#call the midwife smut | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

kurogxrix · 3 months ago

Text

Rain Hell

[part one]

Viking!Bucky x Wife!reader

IN WHICH Your husband Bucky sets chaos in the village as he fails to find the midwife, in suspicion of you being pregnant.

WC: 2.6k

Warnings: pure chaos, mentions of pregnancy, FLUFF, suggestive, allusions to smut/no explicit smut, Bucky accidentally walking in on people.

It’d been a couple of days past the assumption of a possible pregnancy, albeit your husband and you had yet to do anything about it. Well Bucky had wanted to go forward with the whole midwife situation, but you’d always find some creative excuse to lure him back into the hut to sit his ass down instead of going running around the village. Sometimes you’d lure him in with the mere scent of that delicious fruit pudding you made the best, and on other days all you had to do was unravel your dress and he was a goner.

Everything was going according to plan, your husband was either kept in the warmth of your arms inside of your beloved tent, or out hunting with the other men. You couldn’t help the pang of worry that overcame your senses at the mention of a child, and perhaps that was why you had been running from the subject for far too long.

Yet as you dug your head further into the feather-stuffed pillow, your husband adorning his favourite spot between your legs as his arms caged your head, all of your worries and doubts completely dissipated. Your ears blocked out the sound of all outside tumult but the erotic sounds of your husband's deep breaths. You could feel the warm exhale upon your collarbone as he caught his breath, strong arms holding his sturdy frame up, above you.

You took a moment to admire the hunk hovering over you, the way his eyebrows relaxed from their scrunched up position. Sweat rolled down the side of his face as an equivalent of the absolute workout he’d put the both of you through, dampening the little hairs by his forehead. Your eyes moved simultaneously with your hands, unlatching from his shoulders and further down onto his toned stomach. Bucky shuddered as you ran your fingertips down the curve of his muscles, racking his body with goosebumps.

Finally, he relaxed his eyelids to reveal those baby blue iris that you loved so much.

“If i hadn’t planted a baby inside of you before, i'm sure that i did now.” he boasted, a warm smile plastered on his face. For the first time in a while, the whole baby thing hadn’t scared you. Maybe it was because you were too fucked out to even care, but a part of you screamed that you were ready. And it wasn’t like you didn’t believe his words either, the sticky feeling of your combined arousals lapped down your thighs in dismay.

Silence burned at your tent as you allowed your eyes to look away from your husband’s awaiting iris for a second, letting the thoughts consume you before you could give a comprehensive answer back. Images of a whiny baby burned at your mind, angry as its tiny fists drummed at your chest in discontentment. Like their own father, maybe, if they’d grow up to be your child. A grumpy man who’d grow up attached to you beyond breaking after months of fighting back the feeling.

You couldn’t wait to sit back in the thick grass as you watched your husband teach your kids how to wield a bow, making them fierce warriors for when the time was right.

“Everything’s alright up there?” Bucky settled his entire weight down onto your body as he lied down upon you, his head tilting up to meet your gaze. A stark contrast to the Bucky that spent hours chasing down huge beasts or taking down men of opposing regions, he melted like putty in your embrace. You huffed as he got comfortable above you, squishing you down into the comfortable array of furs but you couldn’t say that you were complaining.

“Everything’s alright…Maybe we should call the midwife to confirm if you’re right or not.” you whispered the last part out, as though scared to even utter the words. Your nails ran lightly down his back as the tip of your fingers felt around for the battle scars that he’d acquired over the years. You could feel Bucky’s body stiffening at the sound of your words, making you groan in unease as he pressed you further down into the soft fabrics.

Rolling off of you, Bucky stared at you for a quick second before recovering and rising into his elbows for proper leverage. He wasn’t a daft man by any means, it was easy to read somebody’s body language and mannerisms when you’d spent so many years together. He’d never missed the ways your shoulders would tighten as the mention of the midwife, or how you’d always find something to do coincidently every time he asked you if you wanted to go get checked out for your potential pregnancy or not.

He’d known that the prospect of children scared you…terrified you even, and if there was anything that Bucky wanted for you, it was to feel unsafe. He’d seen what could and had happened to the early mothers and their children, their equipment and techniques were still underdeveloped, it was bound to fail at most occasions.

If you weren’t ready for the risks then he’d stop nagging you with that everlasting dream of his, and if you said that you weren’t ready yet then he’d wait until his very own end for you. Although now, to hear you talk about wanting to confirm this pregnancy on your own accord made Bucky feel like he was dreaming.

“Pray that you’re serious right now, or I swear to the gods above that I'm going to take a walk outside and once I'm back you won’t even be able to feel those legs of yours.” your heartbeat picked up at the husky sound of his so said ‘threat’, knowing damn well that he was not one to forswear.

Plus, how could you renounce your decision at the sight of those hope filled eyes. You braced yourself for the possible prospect of his dream getting crushed, tainting your husband’s happiness in its route. Though you had this nagging feeling at the back of your head that it was true, that you were going to extend that family of yours in just a few months and you’d be damned for wanting to know just a little bit before you could potentially start to show.

“I am.” you smiled up at him, simply. The look on your husband’s face was enough to have your stomach churning, but not with apprehension. Suddenly, you kinda wished he’d take you upon that threat he’d just promised you of, and you thought of lying for a second to get your way with him.

Nevertheless, with a quick kiss on your forehead and a promise to be back soon, the bulky viking was soon out of the tent, and onto his search for the midwife.

Disaster, chaos and confusion. That was all that Bucky had experienced in the past hour that he’d left your shared tent. So far all he’d managed to do was step into a poor old lady’s flower garden, accidently set a half of the cattle free and low and behold, accidently walked in on a neighbouring couple.

Bucky winced at the memory, still fresh on his mind as he was set on finding that damned midwife. It hadn’t necessarily been on his agenda to just barge in on the poor couple like this. Plus, he’d be damned if this was some sort of fucking mating season for the women because fuck, from every hut that he’d consult, all he’d get for an answer was that “she’s probably with-“ and then the name would change every single fucking time.

‘How many goddamn women did the midwife need to consult today anyways?’ Bucky thought as he stomped away.

He was dead worried about you, alone in your little home wondering where he’d run off to, because he sure as hell couldn’t be out looking for that lone midwife in that tiny village of yours for a whole hour.

He worried if you were ok, if you and the baby needed anything. Stupidly, he was already sure that you were carrying his child, and like any stubborn man, he wanted to prove it right to you.

Bucky’s heavy weight dragged on with his boots, carving deep boot marks into the thin layer of snow that covered the ground. His thick beard and tied up hair were collecting snow the more he stood outside, but it was nothing he couldn’t handle. He was a hunter after all, he’d been out in harsher weathers for longer periods of time.

He thought back at you again, and how soon the village would have to move with the arrival of snow to make it back to the main village where you could all refuge back under the comfort of your longhouse, and for most, their own familial huts.

Bucky shook his head, deciding that he’d focus on such matters once he’d made his way back home to his wife. Nevertheless, he felt uneasy as he approached the last tent for the day. Sure the village wasn’t big, but it felt like such a chore going from tent to tent while the whole village was busy and active. It was tiring moving through and questioning the restless crowd, and truly, he was just afraid of falling on another unexpecting couple like he had just done…

Now standing right before the entrance of the tent, Bucky allowed himself to relax, and take a minute to make peace with his surroundings. From a very young age, Bucky’s mother had noticed how his

abilities had been heightened from the other boys his age. He was smarter, stronger and had developed senses more intense than the men around him. He was taller and also seemed to heal slightly faster than the men that he’d grown up with, and that earned him an adequate place amidst the fighters.

Almost like he had been granted some sort of

super-human gift from the above.

He’d often struggled with the concept of having grown with such unprecedented abilities, and for a while, all that life had been for Bucky was putting his gift to use by helping the ones around him. To this day he bore scars that proved his good favours, and he’d once lost himself along the way, stuck in an endless loop of violence and self-loath.

Then… you came along, and everything that he’d ever known had flown straight out the window. You showed Bucky a soft side that only his mother and sister ever had, and banished every memory of his father’s cruel touch. You’d saved him, and for that he'd love you forever.

He’d long since retired from a fighter to a hunter since they hadn’t had much confrontations as of recently, and he prayed for your sake that it stayed in such a way. He begged for you to continue and live in a healthy environment, and if you were to welcome a child of his in this world, then gods would he pray on his knees night and day for things to remain the way they were.

Nevertheless, Bucky took a moment to stay out. Closing his eyes, the (in all hopes) soon-to-be father tilted an ear out to the world around him. He could hear the neighbours chanting, some jolly and some simply drunk at the hour. He could hear the children running around, entertaining themselves as best as they could while being away from home, and an unexpected smile rose upon his lips.

And then-

“-ould stay out of the tent a little, some fresh air should do you some good.”

The midwife, Andora. Lord knows what she’s been conversing about, but Bucky knew that it had

to have been her. She was the lone midwife in their tribe and it was hard to mistake her for another. Yet as Bucky outstretched the flaps of the tent’s opening apart, the frown on his face reappeared at the unwelcoming, unfamiliar faces before him.

Disappointed, he’d left the tent silently, offering no explanations and no excuses to the offended neighbours.

Devastated as he dragged his feet back home,

Bucky didn’t allow it to show on his face. Sure if someone were to acknowledge him on his frustrated walk back home, they’d just assume that he was angry and to just leave him alone. By the way that his eyebrows were furrowed into that usual angry angle, it was obvious that he shouldn’t be messed with at the moment.

Bucky was simply done for the day, sick of all of his misfortune and needing to have you near to ground him like you always did. It didn’t mean that he wasn’t ashamed of facing you, after being out for what felt like hours just to come back home alone. It felt like one of those deceptive hunts where he’d come back empty handed, ashamed and waspish as he stood under the people’s disappointed glances.

He couldn’t remember the time he’d last had felt as conflicted as then, standing before the entrance of his own home. His displeased expression further stretched out on his face at the sound of your voice, which would normally bring him joy, was now conversing to someone he couldn’t quite make out who.

He wasted no time pushing his large stature through the door, the thick fabric of your tent pushing back against his broad shoulders in resistance. Suddenly, Bucky froze at the sight before him, baby blue eyes wide at the sight of you all cozied up on your makeshift bed all while Andora sat besides you.

She was talking to you and you had been listening intently before both of your attentions had been derived by the sudden arrival of your husband. A smile lifted upon Andora’s face as did you, delighted that he’d finally made it back home.

“Got lost out there?” you teased, giggling at the sight of that semi-permanent frown that he wore. Bucky should’ve been mad, really, he’d spent the whole evening frustrated trying to find that god damned midwife that had just seemed to have disappeared from all sights, just to find you and herself in his own tent conversing.

“Can’t lie and say I didn’t.” he grumbled, amidst the way he eagerly made it back to you. Under all the annoyance that Bucky had lived through that evening, he was all the most happy to see that at least you’d managed to have a moment with the midwife, and now you didn’t need to delay the check up that you were bound to receive.

Baby blue iris were bound, stuck on you as Andora shuffled in the corner of his eye. He couldn’t even seem to care for what she’d said, probably muttering a farewell as she exited the premises of your home.

Then the question had left him, sounding muted to his own ears as all he could hear was the excited beating of his heart. He couldn’t focus on anything else but that gigantic smile you wore on your face, a blurry memory of you standing and embracing him like you did whenever he came back from a hunt, him wrapping his arms around you after coming back to his senses, lifting you off your feet and spinning you around all while indulging in the sweet symphony of your roaring laughter.

Words, kisses and even tears had been shared that night and amongst the instances of exhilaration, the sight of a green blanket appeared in Bucky’s line of sight. There, in that instant, Bucky had vowed that if even the gods above couldn’t shelter you, he’d rain hell on whoever would try to endanger his little family…

His little family of 3 this time.

hey babes, sorry that this took so long so come out:( Anyways, you’ve probably forgot about this fanfic already but i’m still tagging everyone who asked for it since like last year😭

@drewsuncrustables @itsmytimetoodream @ravenmoore14 @aoi-targaryen @sebastians-love

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #viking!bucky barnes x reader #viking!bucky #viking!bucky barnes #viking!bucky x reader #bucky barnes x wife!reader #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes #husband!bucky

263 notes · View notes

urhoneycombwitch · 7 months ago

Note

On dad!Steve !! I would love if you could write something about him coming to terms with becoming a dad/pregnancy and labour/just first time dad!Steve in general makes me melt (especially if he's a girl dad 😔)

kay I’ll speak on it bc I have thoughts for SURE

cw: dad!steve, pregnant!R, light emetephobia ment, childbirth desc (no smut but my page is +18 only)

canon-wise, I feel like Steve’s only gotten smarter. obviously he’s still got a goofy himbo side. but he’s getting cleaner with fighting. sharper with his observations. lighter on his feet that’s only come with lots of protective practice.

but the part of him that really cares goes into overdrive after s4, in the canon I’m building in my head 😇 I think he might get a little obsessive about safety for awhile, in the wake of their heroic, underground-world-defeating victory. that kicks into high gear when he finds out you’re pregnant.

(see more of my to-be-named world building here)

for the first few months of your pregnancy he’s never been more grateful to be working in the same building as you. he takes every opportunity to to visit you at your library posting, between teaching his classes (under the pretense of grading papers. Professor Harrington can generally be found at a one-elbow lean on your front desk any time he isn’t in his office.)

he just loves you so much and wants to make sure you’re doing okay. he brings you ginger soda, the fancy brand you like- kept stocked in the staff fridge when your stomach is roiling with nausea, passed with an apologetic kiss to the back of your hand.

bleeding heart Steve feels so bad he can’t take all the pain away, does his best to alleviate your new and growing discomforts. rubs your shoulders and puffy ankles down with lotion each night. gives up coffee in the mornings (even tho he used to RUN on caffeine) so you can kiss him without aversion 💖. he’s with you for every shaky night-sweat throw up session on the bathroom floor, kneeling to hold you hair back from getting sick in it. warm palm on your lower back in assurance and comfort.

he calls it at 6 months. begs and cajoles and patiently argues (sweetheart, you’re wakin’ up so early with work. you should really rest, anyways- find a nice horizontal hobby to keep you off your feet. treat it like vacation 🫶) which turn into not so patient arguments (practically in your third trimester, goddammit, you want me to go crazy with worry? gonna have premature greys at this rate. let me keep you safe, angel, please. for my sake.) until finally you agree to take the damn maternity leave early.

and u know Steve’s reading all the books. how to be a good first-time dad. 101 lessons for the new parent. mother’s health and wellness magazines. childbirthing books. by the end of your third trimester, he’s gained enough knowledge to be an honorary midwife. could deliver the baby himself, if the situation really called for it. better to be prepared 🫡

and that spring , you’re both lounging on the couch. there’s a sunny spot under the big window, and you’re warming like cats, you feet propped in Steve’s lap. moon of a stomach peeking out from underneath a stolen one of Steve’s soft tees. his eyes are fixed on his library book on gentle parenting until you take a sharp inhale.

there’s a spasming band just under your navel that you press your hands into, and Steve pauses in rubbing absentminded at your ankle. looks up at you in concern and then at his watch and says “whoa, that’s like, 4 contractions in the last 5 minutes. are these for real or what?”

and you’re like “uhmmmm. don’t b mad but my water kind of broke this afternoon.”

and Steve looks at you with this very poorly concealed bewilderment that’s quickly morphing into shock and so you start talking before he can like “no no it’s chill. it’s cool!! 😎 doesn’t even hurt that bad and I knew you’d be home at 4 anyways….”

and you quiet when Steve rips his glasses off and pinches his nose between two fingers and says in a Very strangled voice “yeah. okay. well it’s 5 PM traffic right now which means rush hour which means we need to go to plan C right off the bat…”

and you watch this man unravel in the most efficient way possible. tugging at the roots of his hair until it stands overly-tall but managing to pack all your bags in the car in under 3 minutes. a record. and he gets to the hospital using all the mapped-out backroads so you’re there in a tight 15.

but as it turns out, a speedy arrival to the L&D ward of Hawkins Memorial wasn’t even necessary, because you spend the next 21 hours in the most intense, soul-crushing pain Steve’s ever seen you go thru in his life and it almost breaks him. for real.

he’s so soft for you and no amount of reading about other people giving birth could have prepared him for the heartache and helplessness of seeing you ride the wave of a contraction. or go thru the brutal process of getting an epidural, your hands digging into his forearms hard enough to leave bruises as you leaned on him thru it all.

and Steve did not know he could fall more in love w you but he does, the second you become a parent alongside him, wet and wriggling baby girl placed on your chest. spend two nights in the hospital healing up and fumbling through feedings and giggling over your new tiny daughter. counting her fingers and toes every time you unwrap her. cooing over those big brown eyes that look just like Steve’s.

and with his first baby, Steve is overprotective to the max. only Robin can babysit at first, and that’s only after she’s checked off a rigorous amount of reading material from Steve’s comprehensive required book list. he’s fussy about her routine (truly puts so much of the postnatal stress in himself so you can focus on bonding w/ your babe and resting), is fiercely protective over u and the new baby, like mama bear to the maxxx.

he’s actually GREAT at multitasking and the all consuming constant buzz of listening for certain types of crying and feedings and baby hand-offs thru the night really solidify the fact that he can do this. he’s already a million times better than his own parents at it, a fact of which you constantly remind and encourage him with.

and I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again, best thing to ever happen to Steve Harrington is having a second kid bc it chills him way the hell out. for reasons chalked up simply to It's the way the world works, Steve falls into a natural rhythm w your second kid. finds his stride as they say. he’s just as excited and caretaking and protective during your second pregnancy as with your first, but this time without all of the panic and wire-thin nerves. coasts thru calmly.

perhaps a touch too calm, because when you go into labor with your second kid, it’s the middle of a snowstorm in Hawkins, and since u and Steve went thru such a long hard birth with your eldest, you both take your sweet time getting ready to go. saying goodbye to your 3 year-old while aunt Robin comes to stay. even stopping for a snack on the way to the hospital because last time they didn’t let you eat and you were fucking ravenous the whole time.

but then Steve has to drive so slow and safe bc of the snowy roads and you’re still a good 20 mins out when things progress so rapidly and so unlike the first time around; Steve is so level-headed and lets you crush all the bones in his right hand while he drives with his left, coaching you through breathing exercises, trying to keep calm but oh shit, you’re making the same sounds you made three years ago when you brought your first baby into the world, all low groans and gritted teeth and Steve’s pleading with you to hold on, just a few more minutes as he coasts into the emergency bay of L&D. doesn’t give a fuck about parking in a tow zone, they can take the damn car, Steve’s already launching himself out of the drivers seat to scoop you up and hike it indoors.

in the nick of time. 10 minutes and a few pushes later and your second baby is there, all scrunched and tiny, so much smaller than her sister, got the slope of your nose and Steve’s pretty cupids bow. she arrived so fast it feels like a joke, you and Steve cuddling a bit cramped (the way you all like it) in the hospital bed, laughing a little, marveling at the fact that you’re a family of four now, how different it’s all been the second time around. how neither of you realized how much your hearts could expand to engulf your two kids with so much love, it feels like you’re both bursting at the seams 💖

#lu’s anons #steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #dad!steve harrington #dad!steve harrington x reader #mom!reader #parent!reader #steve harrington x pregnant!reader #pregnancy cw

233 notes · View notes

imvec · 19 days ago

Note

heyo saw this on BB discord, would you be down to draw either this short and sweet one: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54451951

Or this bonus smut (doesn't have to be the smut scene) fic of my call the midwife AU? https://archiveofourown.org/works/55292092

"Carefully, Beatrice’s right hand hovers over Ava’s right above the change-over switches on the electronic panel. She counts in a whisper by her ear, “… four, three, two-” She presses, feeling Ava’s hand underneath hers." (Link)

#my art #warrior nun #wn fanart #avatrice #imerr fanart #asks #My 2015 ipad could never #I promised no masterpieces but I'm pretty happy with this #Also cute story!#Everything I know about film projection is from 20 mins on wikipedia #Trying out Rebelle and made this image 14000px across just cause I could #Rebelle has no hue jitter - which is sad for me

56 notes · View notes

noroi1000 · 1 year ago

Text

Honored One Shot no.16 - @loveusatoru

A/n: It was self-indulgence. One more...

„Hold a little longer”

Warnings: smut, rough sex, double penetration, mentioned oral, sex toys, oversensitive, bondage(?), Anal sex.

In a trembling state earlier, you were placed on top of Satoru's hard cock, which was lying on its back on the bed. Your legs were raised, so you had no control over how you sat on him. As Suguru hovered you over him, he aligned his broad head in a straight line so he could fit inside you very quickly and accurately.

You held on to Suguru's arm to keep from falling forward and you had no influence on what happened to you. After they both ate you and you were literally dripping with their saliva and your juices, you couldn't walk properly. That's why you just watched with glassy eyes and legs spread as Satoru's long cock disappears down Suguru's throat as he decides to give him a reward for being a good boy. And his fingers pushed the metal plug into him slowly, making his thighs tremble.

And it all ended with you staying midwife on his erection as he felt your warm tightness. Despite the orgasm, you were so tight and cuddly inside.

As your clit collided with his pubic bone, Suguru pushed you against his the white-haired man's chest and he took the slippery from your skin with his tip to suddenly press against the relaxed circle of your other hole, and you took a deep breath through your nostrils. To slowly push himself into your walls, encouraging you to loosen up even more for him.

Because of how wet you were and his cock, it wasn't painful. But the initial discomfort was there. You can't feel only pleasure at first because his cock is so wide that it takes longer to get used to it.

But he is very proud that both you and Satoru melt with the feeling as he forces his way inside you, hitting every sensitive spot.

Rubbing his hands over your back, he grabbed the bandages Satoru uses to bind his eyes and tied your wrist to Satoru's wrist.

(His arm is longer than yours, so he must have arranged it differently to make it more comfortable for you.)

As it slammed against your hips, Gojo could feel the toy inside him as he moved. That's why his face was more red and fucked up. A small smile on his face as he smiled at your moans and cries in pleasure as two big cocks abuse your tight walls.

"Satoru, I don't know who look more like a whore, you or her. But if I had to say, more you." The dark haired man chuckled as he arched your ass up more so he could thrust his hips into you harder.

He purred, tightening his fingers on the white-haired hand.

"If you felt the same way as me... you'd look the same..." he laughed breathlessly, moving his hips to dig into your pussy.

"You chose to be the switch in our relationship. (y/n) is submissive, you are dominant to her but submissive to me. I dominate you both." He laughed, pushing his hair back from his face. "Besides, I know how much you both enjoy being in this position."

"Baby, look at me." The white-haired hummed and reached for your face, which was wet with saliva and tears. Small drops of sweat gathered on your forehead.

He kissed you by putting his tongue in your mouth. Meanwhile, Suguru didn't stop punching your ass.

Entirely embedded in you, Satoru stayed in the same place, his tip pressing into your cervix. As he moved, Suguru also rubbed Satoru's length. And by nudging him, he also moved within your walls. What made you cry with pleasure. It was too much.

"Sugu..." You reached back with your free hand and he placed your hand on his chest.

"Yeah?"

"I want to–"

Satoru thrust into you from below, hitting deep with a smile.

"You want to cum?" He purred into your ear as he pressed himself against you and laid his chest against your back. "Hold on a little longer. Your pussy will be full until we're both done. Mmm~ I didn't expect you to clench here as well~. So tight... You're pulling me in, you know?"

"Ah...♡"

"Satoru, I'm talking to her. Are you that impatient?" he called out when he knew he had thrust into you, causing you to groan.

He pushed you onto his chest and leaned down, placing his chest against your back. Squeezing you a little. By making you a horny people sandwich.

You were panting into Satoru's chest as they both stopped moving and filled you to the brim.

Suguru's hand gently grabbed Satoru's jaw and crushed his cheeks. His other hand reached for your chin and wiped the saliva from your mouth, placing his fingers on your tongue.

"How sweet you two look together. But sorry Satoru, she looks cuter." He laughed and pushed himself off the bed to slowly pull himself out of you.

His fingers gripped the toy in Satoru and pulled it out less gently.

He wiped the metal with a towel so it wouldn't be slippery to hold.

And then he gently began to push it into you, making sure you were comfortable.

During this time, you tightened your fingers on Satoru's hand and cuddled up to him.

The bandage on your hands was untied and your body was removed from the white-haired man and placed next to him on the bed. Where you could rest for a while without your back bent.

Your head was spinning even though you were in place. You wanted to close your legs but you couldn't feel anything. It's just that the metal has pressed into your walls.

And suddenly there was a shadow above you which turned out to be Satoru. His body covered yours and he hovered above you. His tip blindly found your entrance and began to thrust into you with soft grunts.

Suguru's hand was placed on Satoru's hip as he widened his legs to make it easier to get to him. And then your mouth was covered by Gojo's as he moaned louder.

Suguru was definitely more gentle with you than Satoru.

"Baby, hold on a little longer. And savor the feeling of being full~."

436 notes · View notes

dizzrespect · 8 days ago

Text

🎀 Carrying Stu Machers Child 🎀

warnings; mentions of birth, mentions of smut

this man just loved to breed you. And to be fair, you loved it too. So it wasn’t really a surprise that your period was lacking for over a month now.

When you bought the pregnancy tests you were nervous at first. You didn’t tell Stu, because you were a little anxious about what he‘ll say. You‘re still both in high school and it wasn’t really the goal for both of you to drop out as teenie parents.

When you took the test you were at his place. You’re always at his place since you found out that his parents just kind of abandoned him there.

You were just checking the result window when your boyfriend chimes into the bathroom. It’s a bad habit of his, he never minds if you’re currently pooping or just washing your hands in there. If he wants to be with you, he does.

He doesn’t even realize what’s going on at first, bragging about something Randy told him. When he finally sees the little white pen looking thing in your hands, he stops mid sentence.

"What do you have there, angel?"

When you silently show him the pregnancy test he snatches it from you, checking the result window with a frown.

"You‘re pregnant?", he whispers, looking at you with a baffled expression.

You just nod quietly, suddenly feeling a little ashamed.

The next moment you‘re scooped up into his arms. He spins you around like a little whirlwind and chuckles happily.

"I‘m going to be a dad!", he cheers, smile brighter than ever.

while you’re pregnant

Stu is still the goofy, lighthearted guy you fell in love with

but now he carries all your books and your school bag in school… well, he’s constantly carrying something for you

constantly talking to your belly like an idiot

he always makes sure that you‘ve eaten enough and that you’re hydrated

he even cooks for you

he‘s more protective than ever, always one arm around you or touching you in other little ways

pregnancy sex? yes. of course.

but there’s no position where you don’t face him anymore. he mostly fucks you in missionary, now.

deep and slow with intertwined fingers, pressing your hands into the sheets while he‘s constantly kissing some part of your pretty face or neck

"Is it safe for the baby?", because this idiot thinks his dick is big enough to poke his mini me inside the warmth of your womb

the birth

this idiot somehow managed to come with you into labour

he holds your hand and supports you

little forehead kisses

he eyes the midwifes, ready to fight them if necessary (it’s not necessary, he’s just overprotective)

he offers you water every now and then

when you struggle the first time a sly grin appears on his lips

"damn, angel, I did a great job, huh?"

he shut his mouth after you yelled at him and called him offending names like "stupid idiot"

he doesn’t mind, though. and he stays by your side nonetheless cuz he is, in fact, a stupid idiot sometimes and he appreciates that you still choose to stay with him, to have his child

when the midwives inform him that the little head peaks out he steps closer to have a look

did you thought he would faint? yes.

but he just stands there in awe, eyes sparkling as he watches how you press out the little being you both created

the midwives take the baby and wrap it up in a soft towel, handing it carefully to Stu, who smiles in awe at his little daughter

he steps to you and carefully hands you the little girl

"I want another one", he says which makes you glare at him, holding the little wonder in your arms

#stu macher x reader #scream fluff #scream #matthew lillard

47 notes · View notes

sempersirens · 1 year ago

Text

a bird in your teeth, III

masterlist

summary: joel deals with the aftermath of a traumatic experience

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

warnings: 18+, mdni, neighbour!joel, age gap: reader is early-mid 20s, joel early 30s. no break-out. reference to past SA, trauma, nightmares, general symptoms of PTSD. eventual smut

a/n: hello lovelies! slightly longer part ahead. i've decided to make the next part the final installment of this mini-series, i wanted to explore some more intimate aspects between joel and reader that didn't quite fit here. i hope you enjoy! <3

word count: 3.5k

The sweet chirping of birdsong felt like Mother Nature was playing a cruel joke on you as you stood on the side of the street, arms hugged tightly around yourself. You felt as though the birds were laughing down at you, cackling at your wretched state, sharing an inside joke at your expense. As dawn drew in, her rosy fingers pulled at the remnants of the night's sky. The beauty of the orange and pink hues was wasted on you. To you, it served as a reminder that even as a new day rolled in, the memories swarming your mind wouldn't fade quite as swiftly.

When Joel's truck came hurtling towards you, all notion of time had faded away. You couldn't tell if seconds, hours, or even days had passed since you had lowered your phone from your face. Fifty dawns and dusks could've gone by for all you cared.

The heat from your pumping heart manifested into a blush that crept up your cheeks, and the consequence of your damsel-in-distress phone call settled in your gut.

Joel was here. You had called him, and he had come.

"What happened?" His expression was stern, hair disheveled, and flannel shirt almost comically misbuttoned. You would've laughed if you could remember how.

He grazed your bloody lip with this thumb.

"Sweetheart, what happened?"

"This was a mistake..." You became aware of his hands now on your arms. "Please, don't touch me."

The words tumbling out of your mouth must've sounded as limp and pathetic as you felt. Joel's eyes softened into confusion, and then concern. You didn't have the energy to pull away, but you couldn't bring yourself to look him in the eye anymore. You feared his gaze would open every locked door inside of you and allow the mess to collapse onto him.

He said your name, softly, removing you from his grip and opening the passenger door.

"Let me take you home."

As you had done all night, you silently obliged. Joel guided you into the truck, his hand hovering over the crown of your head. He closed the door gently and made his way into the driver's seat, starting the ignition in silence. Was he angry? You couldn't work it out. His knuckles were wrapped so tightly around the steering wheel they had turned white.

"Joel, please don't be angry with me."

"I'm not angry. I'm taking you back to my place, gonna get you cleaned up, and then when you're ready..."

"Is Sarah okay?" You interrupted.

"Sound asleep. I gotta take her to school in a coupl'a hours, but I'll come straight back to you."

This wasn't right. You shook your head in soft defiance, staring at your lap where your hands sat, fingers interlocked. As you thought of all the trouble you had caused him, you noticed your thumbnails digging into your hands so sharply that you had drawn blood. You turned your palms shakily onto your bare thighs to hide the fresh droplets.

"Honey, where are your shoes?"

Joel's soft inquiry snapped you out of your trance; you hadn't even realized you'd left those fucking cowboy boots on the bedroom floor in your rush out of the front door.

"I left them... I-I didn't think to..." Your breathing became erratic again, chest heaving with each rise and fall feeling like a weight was crushing into your ribcage.

"Hey, hey hey. Breathe. You're with me. You're safe with me, you know that." He reached across your lap and squeezed your still interlocked hands, filling his lungs with air and then exhaling slowly through his mouth like he was a midwife guiding you through childbirth.

You copied his rhythmic breaths, focusing on the emerging purple colors now littering the sky. It was cruel for the sky above you to be so warm and inviting.

You wished for an English February; for thick layers of ice coating the ground with black ice hidden underneath. You wanted it to be the cold that had caused your muscles to freeze, or the harshness of a dry wind to be clawing down your throat. You wished you could blame the weather for the way your body was reacting.

Of all people, you didn't want Joel to see you as weak. You internally reprimanded yourself for pulling him out of his home, away from his daughter to come and save you. Your body and soul had never taken to relying on others easily. Who had you become? You were supposed to be strong. You moved across the world all by yourself, for god's sake.

"What's goin' on in that head of yours?"

"Everything."

The remainder of the journey was silent.

Joel pulled into his driveway, soon exiting the truck and jogging to your side to help you out.

"Easy, darlin'."

He carried your handbag on one arm and looped the other to support your waist. With his free hand, he unlocked the door and closed it quietly behind him.

"Sarah's not gonna be up for another couple hours, you go make yourself comfortable in my bedroom, I'll bring everything y'need."

You gave him a pathetic nod before traipsing up the stairs you had watched Sarah scurrying up only six hours ago. Despite your years of friendship with the Millers, you had never actually gone into Joel's bedroom. You had snuck a peek or two inside whenever the door was left ajar if you passed on your way to the bathroom, but had never set foot inside.

His bedsheets were haphazardly thrown back, half dangling onto the carpeted floor. The fan on his dresser was still humming, sending ripples through his pillowcases. You were reluctant to make yourself at home as he had instructed, so perched on the edge of his bed eyeing the posters dotted on his walls. His bedroom looked like it hadn't changed since his 20s, reminding you of how young he must've been when he started a new life to bring up Sarah in a home he could call his own.

Joel appeared at the door, shutting it softly behind him. He was balancing a steaming mug and a first aid kit in one hand, and some pillows from the sofa under his other arm. He set the mug down on the nightstand beside his bed. Tears swelled in the corner of your eyes at what you recognized as the Yorkshire Tea he kept stocked in the cupboard, especially for you.

"Want you to sit back and get real comfy, alright?"

"Okay."

You hesitantly lifted your legs to rest on the bed, shuffling backward towards the headboard. Joel set the first aid kit at the foot of the bed and leaned over to place the pillows behind your back.

"That okay?"

You nodded your head without looking directly at him.

Wordlessly, Joel walked around to the other side of the bed, setting himself down with a barely audible groan. He brought the first aid kit into his lap and started sifting through the contents.

"You mind if I take a look at your lip?"

"No. I mean - that's fine."

You parted your lips slightly, Joel's fingers lifting your chin up towards him.

"Washed m'hands, promise."

He pulled your bottom lip down to inspect the wound, cleaning the now-dried blood from your chin. The silence in his bedroom made his touch even more intense. You'd felt his hand on your waist, or accidentally brush past your bare skin now and then, but this... You had never been touched by anybody like this before. His eyebrows were furrowed tightly as he put all of his focus into handling you with care.

You had been with your fair share of guys before; boyfriends, one-night-stands, whatever. But the way you felt under Joel's gaze in this moment, holding your chin between his thumb and index finger, made you feel like nobody had ever truly touched you before. Like you were brand new. It made you want to sob. You had to start regulating your breathing again to prevent your lip from wobbling, shattering your impenetrable exterior.

"M'I hurtin' you?"

Finding courage hidden somewhere deep inside of you, you leveled your gaze with his. This close to his face, you could've sworn you saw his pupils dilate.

"No. It's fine, thank you."

"You're doin' so well, honey. Keep breathin' for me." He moved his thumb to stroke your jaw as he spoke.

"I'm sorry, Joel."

"Don't say that. This ain't your fault."

"How can you say that? You don't even know what happened."

"Don't need to. But, I'd be grateful if you'd be so kind as t'fill me in."

You sucked a breath in and brought your knees up to your chest. The birds outside the window began mocking you with their song again.

"You get in a fight? W'that friend of yours who picked you up earlier?"

Oh god. He really had no clue.

"No, nothing like that."

"Somethin' while you were out? Sweetheart, someone had t'have busted your lip like that?"

"I said no."

"So what, you don't remember? You taken somethin'? You're scarin' me, darlin'."

He was pleading. It was dripping all over his face, this deep despair searching your features for the answers your voice couldn't quite give him.

"No, I do. I mean- I said it, I said no. To a guy. O-one second I was falling asleep and then... he was just there, Joel. He appeared out of nowhere. I thought he had gone home. And I was saying no but he was all over me. He was everywhere."

Hot tears were streaming down your cheeks, a dichotomy of relief and anguish flooding through your veins so intensely that any hope of maintaining a stoic facade had long washed away.

You didn't make a sound as you sobbed. Your entire body jerked with each breath, snot ungraciously dripping onto your upper lip. It didn't matter. Joel wrapped you into him without hesitation, your face nestled against his shoulder. He rocked you in his arms, back and forth, back and forth. Your sobs intensified into his t-shirt, eyes squeezed shut. You could feel the tears clinging onto the material, but all he did was hold you tighter.

"Oh, baby girl. It's okay, I got you. I got you now."

"I'm so sorry, Joel." You choked the words out.

"Don't you dare apologize. You let everythin' go. Give all that hurt t'me. I'll take it for you."

Joel pulled you into his lap, your legs collapsed underneath you. He placed a hand on either side of your face, holding you inches away from his own. He had never seen you like this. It shattered his damn heart. He had to keep blinking to fend off his own tears.

“You did the right thing, callin’ me.”

Every inch of him wanted to go back in time to you lingering in the doorway and ask you to stay the night. Hell, he would've gone back to that first time he saw you and taken you in his arms like a sailor returning home from years at sea. The only reason he'd even had the courage to turn up at your front door, mumbling something about burgers, was because Sarah had caught him peeking at you through the curtains for the first few days of you moving in. If you like her so much, why don't you ask her on a date? She had asked so innocently. But she was right; it was that simple. He fired up the grill before straightening himself up and jogging across the street. A Glenn Campbell record had been echoing through your house, something he found even more endearing when he was struck by that accent of yours.

He wanted to tell you that the reason none of his first dates made it to a second was because none of them were you. He was setting these poor women up to fail; how could they ever compete with you?

But right now, you were here. Safe in his arms. He was going to do everything in his power to bring that light back into your eyes.

An hour or so passed like that. You pressed against his chest, falling in and out of a dreamless sleep, Joel's fingers grazing soothing patterns on your arm.

The sound of Sarah's bedroom door closing jolted you awake.

"Ssh, it's okay. S'just Sarah getting ready t'head out. Gimme a minute to go say good mornin'."

You nodded in response, mustering a small smile.

You felt tiny alone in his bed, the absence of his body leaving you feeling hollow. You pulled the covers up to your chin and drew you knees up to your chest, dreading to think what Joel would tell Sarah. She called me in the middle of the damn night, what was I s'posed to do? Maybe she'll get the hint and leave. Imagined narratives swarmed your mind.

Why was it so hard for you to accept his help?

"Oh my god," you gasped, sitting up. "Daisy."

In your state, you had left her there all alone. Mark seemed like a nice enough guy, but didn't they all?

You reached for your handbag hanging off of Joel's door handle and searched for your phone.

14 missed calls. You tapped your foot against the floor anxiously as the dialing tone sounded.

"Moooornin' Ms. Cocktease. How's ya head?" She chirped, the relief that engulfed you allowed your body to slack back onto the bed.

"I am so glad to hear your voice." You breathed.

"That's romantic. You gonna tell me what had you scurrying off in such a hurry at 3am? Y'left your damn boots behind."

"I was... really worried about missing my 9am. It's with my thesis supervisor."

"Sweetheart, a love you but you gotta learn to relax once in a while. Let off some steam! Unclench your jaw, woman."

"I know, I know. I'll work on it."

"How'd you get home, anyway?"

"Oh, um. I called a cab."

"I feel like you're lyin', and I intend to find out what's goin' on. I swear to god if you're fuckin' that old man I'm not gonna know whether to be proud or-"

"Listen, babe, I'm glad you had a good night. Give me all the gritty details over coffee tomorrow?"

"Oh fine. Enjoy your meeting."

The line disconnected as Joel re-entered the room.

"Hey, sweetheart. I'm gonna drop Sarah to school, but I'll be right back. Need me to pick you anythin' up from your place?"

"No, that's okay. I should get out of your hair-"

"I'll be right back."

He walked over and placed a kiss on the top of your head.

---

Joel couldn't concentrate for the entire drive back to his place. He had to pass the street he had picked you up from hours prior to get to and from Sarah's school. The image of you standing there so broken, now knowing exactly why, filled him with grief for the version of you he knew and adored. He wished he had known there and then what you had endured. He knew how strong and capable you were of looking after yourself, so he had to fight every urge to raid each block of flats along the street to find the guy who had done this to you.

He flexed his knuckles back and forth over the steering wheel, forcing himself to go straight home. Back to you. However you decided to deal with this, whether it be today or in five years' time, he would be behind you.

What he would do to find that pathetic excuse for a man, that boy, and slowly take each finger off that he had dared to touch you with. He would make him hurt in ways he didn't even know he could feel pain.

Joel's mind flicked back to the image of you breaking down in his arms and he sucked a breath in to steady himself. He wished he could take all of your pain away and alter the course of the last six hours to have you waking up in his arms unscathed.

He returned home to find you curled up asleep in his bed sheets. He crept under the cover next to you, about to pull you back into his arms when you started thrashing your arms and legs.

"No, stop!" You murmured, still fast asleep.

"Sweetheart, it's me. Hey, hey, hey. It's me. It's Joel." He spoke, holding your face between his hands to try to coax you out of your nightmare.

"Wake up, darlin'. You gotta wake up. It's me, you're safe."

Your eyes finally widened, consumed with fear and confusion. You searched your surroundings and backed away from Joel's grip, still calculating where you were and what the threat was.

"You're okay. Nothing's gonna hurt you, baby."

"Joel... I'm sorry, I-"

"Stop apologizing, I'm sorry. I didn't mean t'scare you, honey."

You sat in silence for a few minutes, slowing your breathing back down and ridding the sound of blood pumping in your ears.

"Do you mind if I have a bath, please?"

"Anything. I'll run you one now. Sarah has some o'that fancy girl soap if you want?"

You smiled softly.

"Sure, that sounds nice. Thank you, Joel."

Before heading to the bathroom, he placed a small kiss on your forehead, lingering with his lips on your skin for longer than he had before. Your eyes fluttered closed as you listened to his footsteps out of the bedroom.

Part of you was desperate to scrub away Elijah's touch until your skin was raw. But, another part of you didn't want Joel's smell to fade from you. In his arms his scent had consumed you, replacing the smell of your laundry detergent with his.

You squeezed your eyes tightly and shook your head.

Stop this. You're projecting onto him. He's looking out for you out of the kindness of his heart and you're taking advantage of it.

You tried to distract yourself from the fixating on the feeling of Joel's lips against your skin by shedding last night's clothes and replacing them with his dressing gown. Which of course also stunk of him. Great.

"S'ready." He called.

Catching sight of you in his dressing gown, Joel had to remind himself to close his mouth.

"Suits you." He smiled.

The bathwater was obscenely pink, bubbles almost escaping over the side of the tub.

Joel stood uneasily as you smiled at the domesticity of the scene.

"I'll give ya some privacy. Make myself busy downstairs. You just holler if y'need me, alright?"

"Joel, wait. Would you... it's stupid."

"What is it, sweetheart?"

"Would you sit with me? I really don't want to be alone."

Joel’s response came so quickly you didn’t even have time to feel bad for being so forward.

"Of course I will. You get yourself comfortable, I'll wait outside the door."

You discarded his dressing gown onto the floor, sinking into the warm tub. You ran some more hot water, feeling unsatisfied until the water was hot enough to leave your skin red wherever it touched.

"Come in." You called, your torso submerged underneath the bubbles with just your collarbones and toes poking out of the pink waters.

Under any other circumstance, he would've dropped to his knees by the side of the tub and told you that he had never seen someone look so perfect before. Your flushed cheeks and hair bundled behind your head against the tiles made Joel feel like he was staring at an oil painting in a gallery.

He adored you. Fuck it, he was in love with you. From the very beginning.

Joel lowered himself onto the closed toilet seat, arms resting on his knees.

"Temperature okay?" Was all he could muster.

"I added a bit more hot, I hope that's okay."

"You women and your damn hot water." He teased. "S'absolutely fine, honey."

Neither of you spoke for a little while, you rested your head back and soaked in Joel's protective presence.

"Can I ask you somethin'?"

"Of course, Joel."

"Did he..."

"No. It's funny actually, he couldn't get it up." You said dryly.

"But he tried?"

"Yeah, he tried."

"I'll kill him."

Joel's protectiveness overwhelmed you, feeling for the first time in your life that you had someone unconditionally in your corner. You lifted your arms from the water to cover your face in embarrassment, revealing finger-shaped bruises that had formed on both of your upper arms.

"Fuck," he breathed when he caught sight of the way you had been mistreated.

He knelt down beside the bathtub, gently pulling your hands away from your face.

"What can I do, honey?" He searched your face for an answer. "Tell me how to take all this away for you."

"Joel, you've done so much already. More than I could ever ask from you."

"I just wanna fix it."

By nature, Joel was a fixer. He patched up Sarah's knees and elbows after soccer games. He bailed Tommy out of jail more times than he would admit. Hell, he even fixed things for work. It was what he did.

"I want you to take me back there." You exhaled a breath you didn't realize you had been holding. "To the apartment. I need to go back."

"Y'sure that's a good idea?"

"I am. But I need to go in alone. I just want to know you'll be waiting outside for me if I need you."

"Sweetheart, I'll always come when you call."

#joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x reader #joel tlou #my fic #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfic #pedrostories #the last of us #the last of us hbo #tlou fanfiction #tlou hbo #a bird in your teeth #a bird in your teeth fic #breakfastatjoels

459 notes · View notes

wangxianficfinder · 10 months ago

Text

I'm in the mood for...

Jan 27th

~*~

1. Hi!!! I really love the fics that you post!! Recently I read Concord by Deastar and I really really loved it! Are there any similar fics like it? @yilinglaobunny / hi!! for the next itmf, do you have any recs that are like Concord by Deastar? down to the happy ending pwease but i love that level of angst :] thank u so much everyone!!

❤️ A Myriad of Blossoms by Itszero (E, 56k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Arranged Marriage, Forced Marriage, YLLZ WWX, Hurt LWJ, Cruel wwx, he’s cruel until he’s not, Protective WWX, Caring WWX, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Eventual Smut, Bottom LWJ, Dark WWX) I believer it's got angst which is somewhat opposite to how the angst is in concord but still ig it could work! lwj marries out and him & wwx knew eo but wwx is sort of rude in the beginning hence the angst

~*~

2. For the next in the mood for- have you ever found any fics that either A) take place in texas or B) are modern fics where one of the characters is learning chinese? Sorry if thats like, too soecific.

~*~

3. Hi! For the next ITMF could I get some recs for some angst? Specifically either a). WWX gets accused of something (doesn’t matter what) and LWJ doesn’t take his side, or b). Some wangxian arranged marriage. Thanks a lot!

3A)

🔒Life as a House by Terri Botta (Isilwath) (T, 55k, WangXian, Modern AU, Corporate Espionage, Post-Divorce, Father-Son Relationship, Reconciliation, Therapy, Angst with a happy ending)

Visitations by Vir_Abelasan (M, 18k, WIP, WangXian, past XiYao, Modern AU, Corporate Espionage, Post-Divorce, Reconciliation, Father-Son Relationship, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Found Family, Custody Arrangements, Not a revenge fic, Past Abuse)

~*~

4. Hello. I read a fic by deviyude thoolika called once upon a time do you know any fics out there with similar angst levels?

~*~

5. ITMF a fic like brother-in-laws by lovable psychopath

similar in the sense that angst is fine and even welcome but i would like there to be certain comedy aspects about it nothing akl serious and depressing

and mainly a time travel fix-it preferably with begrudging jc and lwj co-operation!

thank you so much y'all do gods work i swear🫶 @body-inabyss-heart-inparadise

❤️ For Both Of Us (And Time Is But A Paper Moon) by sami (E, 65k, WangXian, Time Travel, Some People Live/Not Everyone Dies, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, Healing, Yunmeng Shuangjie, Canon Divergence, Asexual JC, First Time, Getting Together, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ) the one where LWJ and JC go back in time together

~*~

6. I was looking for any fics where Lan Wangji is a doula? Or a midwife or anything like that? Much appreciated.

~*~

7. Hi! I’m in the mood for angsty mpreg. Preferably either complete or updating regularly! Don’t care who is carrying, so long as it’s wangxian. Fic about struggling with fertility can count for this too!

A Thousand Paths, a Single Mountain by RohansEarings (E, 79k, wangxian, WIP, Post-Canon, Established Relationship, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Mpreg, Miscarriage, Fertility Issues, Guilt, C-Section, Period-Typical Homophobia, Trauma, Smut, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Porn with Feelings, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Crying, Hugs, Slice of Life) has regular weekly updates

Impermanence, Transience, Permanence by Best Bepsy (BepsyGray) (E, 39k, wangxian, canon divergence, unplanned pregnancy, mpreg, gore, sunshot campaign, assumed miscarriage, medical procedures, childbirth, golden core reveal)

🔒A Scent of Pine in Winter by mondengel (M, 5k, WangXian, A/B/O Dynamics, Angst, Childbirth, Mpreg)

efflorescent by mellowflicker (E, 21k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Established Relationship, A/B/O Dynamics, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Infertility, Mpreg, Hurt/Comfort)

~*~

8. For an ITMF I was wondering if there are any fics where wwx removes the blindfold on phoenix moutain and finds out it was lwj that kissed him / Hello! For a future mood post... I'm in the mood for fics where Wei Wuxian figures out that Lan Wangji was his mysterious kissing maiden in the woods either during/right after the kiss!

The Breaking of Your Soul (Upon My Lips) by sunsandships (M, 40k, WangXian, XuanLi, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Mutual Pining, Canon-Typical Violence, Golden Core Reveal, Happy Ending) WWX figures out it was LWJ immediately

~*~

9. Are there any fics where wwx or lwj or both is/are racers? Or street racers?

The Fast and The Untamed by Beltenebra (E, 17k, wangxian, modern, Motorcycles, Adrenaline Junkie WWX, Getting Together, First Time, Frottage, Major Character Injury, non-permanent injury, Action/Adventure, Motorcycles as Swords, Stunt racing as Cultivation)

Let the streetlights guide you home by tellthemstories (M, 37k, wangxian, modern, UST, car racing, Mojo’s bookmark) cannot recommend the podfic by jellyfishfire highly enough

~*~

10. Itmf fics more like: caught on 4k

~*~

12. can u give me a bunch of wangxian and nielan fics? no 3zun and nielan doesn’t need to be there in equal measure - background nielan is good too ! @willesnelson

🔒❤️ shades of grey by cl410 (M, 58k, nielan, wangxian, Hurt/Comfort, Accidental Sibling Acquisition, Single Dad NMJ, NHS & WWX Friendship, Fluff, Humor, Happy Ending, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Protective NMJ, Some angst, Blood and Injury, Kidnapping, Protective Siblings, Found Family)

Beneath Your Skin by Wrenwolf (E, 147k, WangXian, NieLan, Modern AU, Tattoos, Small Town, Idiots in Love, Mutual Pining, Fluff and Humor, Angst and Humor, Sexual Humor, Bad Humor, Slapstick, Brotherly Love, explicit sex eventually, Two POVs, A touch of kink, Panic Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Found Family, Rabbit-babies)

🔒Welcome to the Family Series by jiejieaini (E, 231k, WangXian, NieLan, XuanLi, Modern AU, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, London, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Adopted WWX, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Reunions, Hand Jobs, Gay Sex, Consensual Non-Consent, Dom/sub Undertones, Blow Jobs, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Christmas, Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Praise Kink, Rough Sex, Rough Kissing, LWJ and WWX Have a Breeding Kink, First Time, Public Blow Jobs, High School, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Falling In Love, Love Confessions, Blowjobs, Soft WangXian, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Family Fluff, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Drowning, Canonical Character Death, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Dubious Consent, Rimming, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, Marriage Proposal, Weddings, Nightmares, Adoption, Pregnancy)

found in translation by sysrae (E, 12k, LXC/NMJ, wangxian, modern cultivation, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, not LQR friendly, Meddling brothers, Coming Out, Loss of Virginity, Under-negotiated Kink, slight breathplay, Light Dom/sub, Aftercare, Angst with a Happy Ending)

Magic Mishap by Regency_Bunny (T, 8k, WangXian, NieLan, Modern AU, Single parent WWX, Fluff, Humor, Kid Fic, Meet cute, Love at first sight, Himbo LXC, Magic tricks)

A Piece Of Cake by NebulusCharlie (Not Rated, 39k, WangXian, NieLan, Modern AU, fluffy nonsense, you know the drill, WangXian meet cute, Friends to Lovers, no magic, self indulgent fluffiness, All Good Vibes, Photographer WWX, Best man LWJ, LXC and NMJ's marriage)

~*~

13. post break up fics, where they're both moping! modern aus but anythings good!! smrh sad maybe @bunnycoffeeumcat

~*~

14. Hiya! Got two nsfw itmf requests - a) would love some “teaching one partner how to masturbate/have sex” fics, with any pairings except yi city and b) any Yanli centric pwp. Thank you!!

14A)

an inch away from more (than just friends) by occultings (microcomets) (E, 15k, Female WangXian, Modern AU, Rule 63, Femslash, Lesbian Sex, Genderbending, Pining while fucking, sexuality exploration, Compulsory Heterosexuality, Friends to Lovers, Masturbation, Kissing, Cunnilingus, Vaginal Fingering, Getting Together, Swim Team, Diving, Pool Sex, Outdoor Sex, Jealousy) WLW WangXian and a surprising amount of angst for what it is but still amazingly great

sideways by vesna (mrsronweasley) (E, 20k, wangxian, F/F, Modern, Cisswap, butch dyke LWJ, Casual Sex, not so casual sex, many many orgasms, Fingerfucking, Cunnilingus, strap-on sex, So much kissing, WWX gets rekt, straight girl WWX, except for how she isn’t) WLW again sorry, the best ones of these I have are WLW, I'll for MLM in a bit here

solstice: 那夏天的我们 by auberjing (E, 24k, wangxian, canon divergence, no sunshot campaign, cloud recesses study arc, masturbation, sex education, pining, smut, angst w happy ending, getting together)

Fentao-laoshi’s Guide to Cut-Sleeve Pleasures by occultings (microcomets) (E, 31k, wangxian, canon divergence, pining while fucking, friends with benefits, first time, cloud recesses study arc, practice kissing, sharing a bed, jealousy, getting together, confessions, happy ending)

Push It by phonciblepbone (E, 7k, WangXian, Modern AU, lwj FUCKS, so does WWX, straight boy wwx, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Pining while fucking, Blow Jobs, Masturbation, Frottage, Rimming, Anal Sex)

~*~

15. Hello!:D I’d like to know if you’ve got a high school/college AU comp? And if you don’t I’d like to ask wangxian high school or college recs for the next itmf. Thank you ☺️

keep up by mimilamp (E, 27k, WangXian, Modern AU, High School AU, First Time, Practice Kissing, Practice hj, Sexual Content, Compulsory Heterosexuality, Pining while fucking, Teen Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dirty Talk)

boyfriend material by ricken (M, 41k, wangxian, college/university au, mutual pining)

please don’t let me be misunderstood by sysrae (T, 3k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, getting hit by cars, Past Child Abuse)

❤️ save a sword, ride a socialist by sysrae (E, 33k, wangxian, modern w magic, college/university au, fake/pretend relationship, single parent WWX, homophobia, light angst w/ happy ending, idiots to lovers, fluff)

like, comment, share & subscribe by detectorist (T, 22k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, YouTube, Social Media, Flirting, Humour, Banter, Getting Together, First Kiss, Texting, so much texting, Youtubers For Social Justice, The Gang Gets Political, Competitive Flirting Via The Medium Of Youtube, it’s about the yearning, YouTube Rivals To Lovers)

through a window softly by impossibletruths (T, 14k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, Neighbors, Music, They Play Music Together But They’ve Never Met, It’s very romantic, Graduate School)

the moon lives in the lining of your skin by sarahyyy (M, 9k, wangxian, Modern, College/University, Friends With Benefits, Misunderstandings, Oblivious, Pining, Love Confessions, Sharing a Bed, Roommates)

Wei Wuxian’s Super Spicy Kissing Booth! by NoteInABottle (T, 4k, wangxian, Modern, Fraternities & Sororities, Kissing Booths, Kissing, Rush Week, College/University, disclaimer: author has never been in a frat, Pining, , Idiots in LoveHumor, Peppers, scoville scale, Food as a Metaphor for Love)

on your marks, get set, bake! by BlackWiresOnHerHead (G, 41k, Modern, College/University, The Great British Bake Off AU, Humor, no GBBO knowledge required for entry)

if you ever feel alone, don't by livinginaworldofnoise (G, 25k, wangxian, Modern, College/University, Texting, group chat au, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, everyone is chaotic but especially wwx, disaster bi wwx, Matchmaking, Bad Matchmaking, maybe a splash of light angst just for fun, the most dumbassery u have ever seen, Mutual Pining, Miscommunication, an unholy amount of miscommunication really, chatfic, now with a bonus valentine's day chapter, Podfic Available)

But really, why? by Scrippio (T, 52k, wangxian, JYL/JZX, JC/WQ, Modern, College/University)

Marks of weakness, marks of woe by Song_of_Storms (E, 40k, wangxian, WIP, Modern with Magic, College/University, Dark Academia, Rivals to Lovers, Dark LWJ, Slow Burn, Eventual Smut, Murder Mystery, Minor Character Death, Familiars, Fencing, Nonbinary NHS, Poison, Aftermath of Poisoning, LWJ's canonical inability to distinguish between immediate hatred and immediate attraction, furthering the LWJ/JZX/Mianmian friendship agenda, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Intrusive Thoughts, Blood)

How Wei Ying Went from Oblivious Idiot to Shameless Boyfriend in Three Days by misscam (T, 5k, wangxian, Modern, College/University, Getting Together, Humor)

~*~

16. Please find fics where Lwj takes wwx back to Gusu @lostsoul234

~*~

17. Thank you all for fueling my escape from reality. Itmf Su She is a jealous snake and gets what he deserves. 😈

🧡 Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 762k, WangXian, WIP, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Feelings Realization, Getting Together, Sexual Tension, Supportive LQR, Light Angst, Internalized Homophobia, Period-Typical Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, WWX learns about his parents, First Dates, First Kiss, First Time, LWJ is confused, Then he is 100 percent on board, Kink Discovery, Kink Exploration, Bisexual WWX, Dual Cultivation, Slow Burn, Fix-It of Sorts, Not JFM friendly, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff and Angst, Blood and Gore, Supportive LXC, Protective LXC, Canon Divergence, Inventor WWX, Eventual Smut, Possessive LWJ, Genius WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Scheming NHS, Cultivation Discussion Conferences, Pre-Sunshot Campaign, Minor Character Death, NHS gets himself a beard (not the facial kind), POV WWX, Fluff and Smut, Burning of the Cloud Recesses) SS getting punished for his bullshit is a small part of the overall fic but it's notable that it happens more than once because he just Will Not Learn

Su She Eats his Heart Out by KizuKatana (T, 16k, wangxian, modern, Guest-starring the belated but incendiary sexual awakening of LWJ, 3rd person pov, SS is hyperfixated on LWJ, LWJ does his best to pretend SS doesn't exist, WWX isn't even pretending he really doesn't notice SS exists, MM exists and is awesome, implied offscreen wangxian sex)

🧡🔒 rain falls and soaks into the earth series by RoseThorne (T, 53k, WangXian, WIP, Near Death Experience, Attempt Drowning, Madam Yu Bashing, Recovery, No war AU)

~*~

If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic recs #i'm in the mood for a fic #the untamed #wangxian fic search #wangxianficfinder #long post

95 notes · View notes

sixhours · 8 months ago

Text

One Day at a Time - Chapter 7 - Birth

Series Chapter Index | Read on AO3 | Complete

Rating: Explicit, 18+, here be smut Series tags: The Last of Us, The Last of Us (HBO), Joel Miller x f!OFC, Joel & Ellie, mostly follows canon, SMUT, gratuitous smut, dubious consent (drunk sex), unplanned pregnancy, fluff, references to past miscarriages, angst, hurt/comfort, romance, age gap (~21 years), childbirth, fluffy baby stuff, I've probably forgotten some so please let me know <3

It’s December. They passed the date Joel circled on the calendar three days ago and the waiting is slowly driving them mad.

Charlie wakes up restless and frustrated, unable to get comfortable, exhausted but unable to sleep. The baby is restless, too–kicking her ribs, pushing against her lungs, making it hard to take a deep breath. She’s snappish and moody and leaks tears over the smallest things.

They’ve run out of fruits and have settled on calling the baby Pumpkin because it’s the biggest, even though Charlie hates it, she tells him, because the idea of pushing a fucking gourd out of her vagina makes for a horrible mental image.

She’s ready for this to be over.

He’s not ready at all.

On the fourth day, Joel radioes Tommy and tells him to find someone to cover his patrol shift. Something tells him he needs to stay home. He putters about looking for things to do to fill the time. He nails down the loose floorboard in the upstairs hall and patches the tack holes in the wall and fixes the dripping faucet in his bathroom and oils the squeaky hinges on the doors. When that’s done, he goes looking for projects in Ellie’s garage, but she turns him away at the door.

“Nuh-uh, nope. Not happening. The last time you were in here to ‘fix’ something it took three weeks and I ended up with a wall of bookshelves.”

“But you love your shelves,” he says. He looks over her shoulder, eyeing a mostly empty corner. “You could use more storage–”

“You don’t have that kinda time now, dude.”

So he leaves, nesting instinct unfulfilled, and finds himself pacing the floor.

“You’re hovering,” Charlie mutters from her place on the couch after he’s asked for the fourth time if he can get her anything. “You should have gone to work.”

“Like hell,” he growls at the idea of being miles away on horseback, outside the walls and away from her.

They still don’t have a name, a cradle, or any clothes beyond the soft yellow sleeper. Maria, recognizing that the situation was delicate, had dropped off a stack of cloth diapers. They sit in a bag next to the front door, untouched.

That night they assume their usual positions; him propped up against the headboard with his reading glasses and the book, and Charlie on her side, pillows tucked around her in a makeshift nest. His hand finds her stomach, but the baby is quieter now, too cramped to move much.

Charlie squirms, grumbles, shifts, and retucks the blanket and pillows. It takes an hour for her to fall into a restless doze, and he keeps reading the same lines over and over, too distracted and keyed up to sleep. Her stomach tightens under his hand, the baby pressing the hard plane of its back into his palm.

Then it happens again. And again. Every few minutes.

He checks his watch by force of habit, forgetting for the millionth time that it hasn’t worked in twenty years. He notes the time on the bedside clock instead, 10:54.

11:06. 11:12. 11:25.

At 11:38, her hand clutches his fingers and she lets out a soft moan.

“Joel…?”

“M’here,” he says, knowing what she’s going to say.

“I think this is it.”

“I don’t want her here.”

“I know, but–”

Charlie’s eyes are bright and forceful. “Not yet, Joel. I will not deal with that woman. Not yet.”

He gets it. The midwife is the last person he wants to see, either. But she’s the one with the training and experience.

“We have to at least let her know.”

Charlie scowls, then shuts her eyes, taking a deep breath.

“Another one?”

She nods, distracted, and he looks at the clock. 1:03.

“They’re not close together yet,” Charlie says when the contraction passes. “The book says five minutes.”

“The book assumes we can go to a hospital,” Joel counters, and she shoots him a black look. “Look, I’ll tell her to stay put until you’re closer, but–”

“No,” Charlie says, soft but firm. “And would you sit? You’re making me nervous.”

He does then, sitting on the bed, forced to wallow in his terror. Had it been this bad with Sarah? No, because there had been nurses and doctors and an epidural that had eased the way considerably if he didn’t think too hard about the length of the needle and where it went.

He’d also been twenty-two and blissfully ignorant. He hadn’t known loss, hadn’t known just how bad it could get. He sees every little way this could go wrong and the fear clutches at his heart and holds fast.

Charlie takes his hand and squeezes. “We can do this.”

He doesn’t know if he can, but he squeezes back and watches as she folds over her belly in concentration when the next contraction takes hold.

She labors on the bed, walking around, rocking in the chair, pressing tight fists to her lower back. He fills her water glass from the bathroom tap and washes his hands fifteen times, even though he hasn’t so much as touched her beyond letting her grip his fingers during the worst ones.

Ellie comes in to get breakfast before school. He hears her downstairs, calling for him.

“Go,” Charlie says from her current position, curled on the bed with a pillow between her knees. “She needs you. I’m fine.”

He’s still dressed in pajamas; gray sweatpants and a white tee, hair mussed and eyes red-rimmed. Ellie takes him in, raises an eyebrow in a silent question.

“Yeah, she’s in labor,” he says. “Gonna be a day.”

“I’ll make coffee.”

“You don’t have to do that, kiddo.”

She eyes him up and down, scoffs. “You need it, dude.”

“Thanks,” he says. “I’m, uh, I’m gonna let Tommy and Maria know…if I can find the damn radio…”

“You brought it upstairs, remember?”

Right. He kept the radio by the bed just in case Charlie went into labor in the night. Of course.

“Thanks, kid,” he says thickly, suddenly awash in gratitude with a lump in his throat.

“Go,” she says, already scooping coffee grounds into the pot on the stove. “I can burn my own toast.”

He doesn’t taste the coffee, or the not-burnt toast Ellie brings up, enough for both him and Charlie.

The midwife shows up sometime before noon and does nothing to put them at ease.

“I need to make this quick. I’ve got another patient across town and it’s not good.”

Joel stands in the doorway with his hands on his hips. “Don’t you have a…a backup or somethin’?”

“Does it look like I have backup?” she snaps.

She proceeds with the exam with her usual curt efficiency as Joel paces.

“You’re three centimeters,” she says to Charlie eventually, shucking her gloves off. “It’s going to be a while. Get comfortable. Stay hydrated.”

And then she’s gone.

Joel wants to follow the woman outside and drag her back and chain her to the radiator until the baby is delivered safely. It’s either that or strangle her. But Charlie’s pitiful moan from the bed douses the flames of his anger immediately.

“Get comfortable? Is she fucking kidding,” she wails, gripping him tight. “I hate her.”

“I know, I know,” he says. “We’ll…figure something out.”

He calls the only other person he knows who has first-hand experience with childbirth; his sister-in-law.

Maria suggests a beer and a bath; something about the alcohol and warm water acting like natural muscle relaxants. Charlie, exhausted and in pain, is willing to try anything. She sips the beer and undresses as he fills the tub, grateful to have something to do.

He helps her into the bath and kneels on the floor beside it, resting his forearms on the rim and watching over her like a sentinel. Her belly rises out of the water, a glazed wet dome, every contraction causing the water to ripple around her as she grimaces and arches and groans.

Sometimes she comes out of her fog of pain and blinks up at him as if seeing him for the first time, and it makes his heart clench.

“I’m glad it’s you,” she murmurs in one of those quiet moments.

“Yeah?” He dabs a washcloth at her temple, urges her to drink while she’s relaxed.

He hears Maria downstairs, probably boiling water and sanitizing things and doing all the things he should be doing but can’t because he can’t leave Charlie’s side.

He’s scared. He’s never been this scared.

He remembers sitting in the hospital and praying when Sarah was born. He wasn’t a praying man, not even then, but it had seemed the only thing he could do. Now he thinks of her, of his first baby girl, and he silently asks for her help. He doesn’t believe in God, but he does believe in her.

“Joel?”

A hesitant voice at the bedroom door. Joel rouses himself from his place by the tub. Charlie has relaxed a little, but the contractions are still ferocious. Her cries echo in the small space and he winces every time, wishing he could do something, anything to take this away from her.

“Be right back,” he whispers, leaning over to place a kiss on Charlie’s forehead. She nods but doesn’t open her eyes.

Ellie is standing in his bedroom looking small and lost.

“Hey, kiddo,” he croaks. “What’s up?”

She hesitates at the door. “Maria’s downstairs. She, uh, said there’s dinner if you want it. We’re gonna watch a movie.”

He nods. “Good. I’ll eat…later.”

“Maria said you’d say that. She also said to tell you not to wait too long or you’ll pass out like your brother did when Izzy was born.”

Joel snorts. “Alright, I hear ya.”

There’s a groan from the bathroom, a low, primal keen of need that Joel has to physically restrain himself from answering. Ellie’s eyes grow wide.

“You okay, kid?”

She swallows hard. “I just…is this, uh…normal?”

“Yeah, sure, yeah,” he says, trying to imbue his words with a certainty he doesn’t feel. “The first one is always slow.”

“It sounds fucking awful,” she grimaces. “Was it like this with Sarah?”

“A little, I guess. I don’t…honestly remember. We had drugs back then,” he mutters, rubbing the back of his neck. God, what he’d give to live in a world with epidurals again. He’d take a needle to the back himself if it meant Charlie didn’t have to go through this. He’d take worse.

Ellie looks at him then, soulful brown eyes, and her face crumples, mirroring the fear he’s kept an iron-tight grip on all day.

“Baby girl,” he murmurs, closing the distance between them and tucking her against his chest. “S’alright. It’s gonna be fine. Charlie’s doing good. She’s strong. The baby’s fine. Just…takes a while.”

“I’m never having kids,” she mutters in a watery sigh, muffled by the fabric of his t-shirt.

He huffs a soft laugh into her hair, rubbing her back. “Don’t blame you. You don’t have to be scared, though.”

He pulls away, cups her face in his hands, and kisses her forehead.

“S’worth it…can tell you that much.”

She drags a sleeve across her face and nods. “Should I bring up a plate?”

“Yeah. That’d be good, kiddo. Thanks.”

Hours pass. There’s a cold plate of food on the floor by the door and a melted bowl of strawberry ice cream next to the bathroom sink. Joel had three bites for dinner; chicken, mashed potatoes, and something green. Everything tasted like paste, which was not a slight on Maria’s cooking, only that he couldn’t take his focus off Charlie. She’d opted for the ice cream and had done better than him, eating half the bowl in slow, measured spoonfuls in between contractions.

Eventually, the hot water tank is drained and the bath grows tepid, forcing her out. She stands in the middle of the bathroom, leaning into Joel’s chest as he dries her off and wraps her in a robe.

“You doin’ okay?” he asks, rubbing her back as she shivers. “You cold?”

She shakes her head. “Just tired.”

“Bed?”

She nods, then digs her fingers into his arm as a contraction hits.

“Ohhhh, fuck.”

“I got you,” he murmurs, although he’s swaying on his feet, so tired he’s slurring his words. He’s been up for thirty-something hours; when he tries to do the math, everything gets fuzzy at the edges. Then he remembers he’s not the one with a vise grip rearranging his internal organs. He forces his eyes open.

“Bed,” he says firmly when she’s no longer clutching at him, urging her along.

She curls on her side and he faces her, giving her his hand to squeeze. She tucks it against her cheek, closing her eyes as her abdomen tightens again. The water and the beer seem to have helped; she’s quieter, at least.

“Hurts,” she whimpers, a permanent furrow taking up residence between her brows.

“I know,” he soothes, brushing a damp tendril of hair from her forehead. “What can I do?”

She shakes her head.

At some point, she slides his hand under her robe. The baby moves under his palm. For now, everyone is safe. For a little while, he can pretend this is any other night, just the three of them tucked in bed together.

Then she arches and moans, grabbing at him, drawing out his name into multiple syllables.

“Yeah, I know, baby. I know. M’here,” he says, feeling the panic inside begin to take over. He’s so fucking helpless he could cry.

Then she kisses him, pulling his mouth to hers, urgent and needy, and he tastes strawberries. She grasps at the hem of his t-shirt, urging it over his head, suddenly desperate to feel his skin. When she pushes his hand down to the small furnace burning between her bare thighs, the message is loud and clear.

“You want…that? Now?”

“Mmhm, please,” she moans, a breathy little hitch that, under normal circumstances, would have him rock-hard and struggling to restrain himself. As it is, he’s too tired to protest. He can’t deny her anything.

They’ve done this dozens of times since they started sharing his bed. She’s soft and swollen and slick under his fingers. The orgasms come easily and seem to dilute the pain. Soon she’s stretched out against him, one leg thrown over his hips, nuzzling into his chest, and neither of them can keep their eyes open.

He’s jolted out of sleep by Charlie’s fierce grip on his hand and a sound that’s almost animal from her throat.

“M’here,” he groans, cursing himself for falling asleep. “Right here.”

He sits up, glancing at the clock; they’d been given an hour and a half of respite.

“She means business,” Charlie mutters through gritted teeth, clutching her stomach and getting to her feet.

“She, huh?”

Charlie doesn’t answer, fumbling with the sash of her robe. “Need…this…off.”

He gets up, helps slide the robe off her shoulders and she leans back into him, naked, hips swaying.

Refueled by ice cream and sleep, she’s restless; no position can bring relief. Time stretches in front of them, a series of back-to-back contractions that force sounds from her throat that Joel has never heard and never wants to hear again.

She finally settles on her knees at the edge of the bed, arms wrapped around him, pressing her face into his neck. Her pained sobs wrench at him, something animal, and it’s all he can do not to cry in frustration. Instead, he babbles outright lies into her hair, doin’ so good baby, s’almost over, almost done, she’ll be here soon .

She , he thinks dully, then the pain comes and her groan into his neck washes the thought away. Her water breaks, a warm gush down her thighs, and he has the sense that things are about to move fast.

“We need to call the midwife,” he whispers, and he knows it’s serious when Charlie doesn’t protest, just nods limply into his shoulder.

He doesn’t remember calling for Maria, but she’s at the door, radio in hand. She meets his eyes over Charlie’s shoulder, gives him a tight look and shakes her head.

There’s no midwife.

Fuck.

“Okay, okay,” he breathes, quashing down his dread. “Looks like you’re stuck with me.”

Time ceases to make sense; minutes pass in seconds, seconds pass in minutes. Towels and blankets appear on the other side of the bed. He’s vaguely aware of Maria’s movements on the other side of the door, thinks he hears Tommy and Ellie’s voices at times.

Charlie remains on her knees on the bed, arms locked around his neck, shuddering against him through every contraction. His back is throbbing from the lack of movement, but he won’t budge unless she tells him to.

He doesn’t know how long they stay like that. He closes his eyes and holds her and whispers words he hopes she can hear from the depths of her pain.

Later, he’ll blame sleep deprivation for the visions. He sees Sarah, alive and smiling, wearing her favorite Halican Drops t-shirt and handing him a glass of orange juice. He sees Ellie laughing and holding out bright green leaves to a giraffe in the Salt Lake City park. They calm him, silencing the frightened voice inside that reminds him how much he stands to lose.

Eventually, Charlie pulls away, bracing her hands on his shoulders, grimacing.

“I need…I need–”

“Think you need to push?”

“I don’t…know. It feels…different.”

“Different bad? Or different good?”

“I don’t know,” she huffs. “I don’t…I just…”

He urges her backward away from the edge of the bed before another contraction hits. Her fingers tighten on his shoulders and she bears down, a tentative, hesitant little push.

“That was good,” he whispers, grabbing one of the clean towels behind her. “Let’s try again with the next one.”

The next hour passes in flashes, small moments he will remember for the rest of his life.

Joel’s hand covering Charlie’s as she feels for the baby, her panting as she bears down again and again and again.

The pressure of the baby’s head against his palm, the dark, slick hair emerging from the depths of her body as the baby crowns.

The warm, wet weight of a tiny body sliding into his outstretched hands in a sudden, slippery rush.

Charlie’s awed, trembling whisper in his ear, a girl, it’s a girl .

Clutching the child against his bare stomach with one arm as his other arm wraps Charlie’s waist and eases her back against the headboard.

The endless seconds of silence as he rubs the length of her tiny back with firm strokes, c’mon baby girl, c’mon, breathe for me .

The elation when he feels her first breath, feels her tiny lungs inflate under his palm as their daughter comes to life with a roar.

He vaguely registers a whooping from outside the bedroom, but his world has narrowed to three people. He’s kissing Charlie’s forehead, whispering nonsense into her hair, did so good, baby, so good, so good .

Then there’s the baby in his arms, his daughter, and she’s shaking, why is the baby shaking?

Then he realizes it’s him, his hands are trembling, the aftermath of the adrenaline rush hitting hard and turning his limbs to jelly. He needs to put her down, he’s terrified he’s going to drop her, but he can’t make himself let go, can’t stop looking at her, squirming, little legs and arms kicking and flailing as she arches against him, so strong, he thinks, she’s so goddamn strong–

“Please–” he grits out, trying to find the words, feeling frozen as the panic creeps back in.

Then Charlie is there, her hands over his, gently extracting the squalling baby and pulling her onto her chest with soft whispers, yes sweet girl, I know, tell us, I know .

He reaches for the closest thing he can find to cover the child–his t-shirt, worn and soft and smelling like him–and tucks it around her tiny frame. Then he grabs a clean blanket from the stack Maria left on the bed and drapes it over Charlie’s trembling shoulders and back, careful not to cover the baby.

Charlie’s silver eyes are bright and shining as she studies the little girl in her arms, drawing a fingertip down the tiny arch of her nose, her ear, the soft fur of her eyebrows. She smiles so big it makes something in his chest splinter and crack.

He wants to make her smile like that for the rest of his life. He wants to cover their bodies with his and hold them still in this moment forever, keeping the rest of the world at bay.

But he can’t, so he tries to make himself useful. He cuts the cord. He fetches warm washcloths, strips the soiled bedding, fusses, and paces until Charlie catches him by the arm as he’s checking her full water glass for the second time.

“Joel, stop,” she says softly. “Look at her.”

He’s afraid if he stops, he’ll break the fuck down, but she pulls him onto the bed next to them.

“Look at her,” she repeats.

The baby turns her head toward her mother, seeking, and Joel watches as Charlie attempts to latch her, the tiny mouth closing over one dark nipple, and his heart feels like it’s going to turn inside out.

He walks downstairs on wooden legs to expectant faces. Ellie, perched on the couch next to Maria, lights up when she sees him.

The words catch in his throat. “You’ve got a sister.”

The relief on her face is palpable. Then she’s off the couch, meeting him at the foot of the stairs. She almost reaches out, then hesitates, like something might have changed between them.

“C’mere,” he mutters, folding her into his arms, and that’s when the tears finally come, relief and joy and sadness all muddled together. He holds his daughter, a lifeline to his past and a gateway to his future all in one.

He meets Maria’s eyes over her shoulder and gives her a silent nod of thanks. He doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to do enough work around Jackson to pay for her kindness.

“You can, uh, come up and see her,” he sniffs when he can safely speak again. “Both of you.”

“You go,” says Maria to Ellie. “You need some time together. As a family. I’ll bring Tommy and Izzy by later.”

Joel’s throat closes up again. As a family.

“C’mon, kid,” he chokes out. “Let’s go meet your sister.”

The midwife misses the birth by three hours. When she finally arrives, she looks haggard, with dark circles under her eyes and her sharp tongue dulled. She assesses Charlie and the baby with her usual efficiency, but she’s quiet about it. Maybe she finally senses Joel’s mood, or maybe she’s just as exhausted as them.

She asks them questions about the birth, examines the placenta, and makes a few notes.

“The bleeding should taper off after about a week. Some cramping is normal, but if you’re soaking more than a pad an hour, you need to tell me.”

Joel still hovers, hulking over the midwife with his arms crossed, biceps flexing, jaw set. If he thought he felt protective over Charlie before, the baby’s presence has made him fucking feral. He’s practically vibrating when Joanie takes the baby to examine her and weigh her, and Charlie’s touch on his arm is the only thing that stops him from growling and spitting like a wild animal.

Joanie unwraps the baby from her bundle and listens to her breathing and her heart, tests her reflexes, and nods, apparently satisfied. Then she swaddles her back up and hands her to Charlie.

“She looks great,” she says flatly. “You’re lucky.”

The unspoken implication gives him pause; others had not been so lucky.

“Put her on the breast every hour,” Joanie continues. “Let her nurse as much as she wants. It’ll help your milk production and boost her immunity. If she starts losing weight or she’s not getting enough from you, there’s a donor program. We don’t have formula, but she won’t starve.”

Then she’s packing up her things, saying she’ll be back in the morning to check in, and to radio if there’s an emergency.

“And congratulations,” she says before taking her leave. Maybe he’s delirious from lack of sleep, but he thinks he sees the old woman crack a smile.

“So what’s her name?”

That evening, Ellie holds the baby in her lap in the rocker, cradling her bundled sleeping form along her thighs with her head cupped in her palms.

Joel looks at Charlie, raising an eyebrow.

“You still haven’t named the poor kid? Sheesh.”

“She’s eight hours old,” Joel grumbles.

“Consider us open to suggestions,” Charlie yawns.

Ellie considers the little bundle in her lap, sizing her up. “How about…Sally Ride? Sally Ride Miller.”

She looks at Joel expectantly.

“Uh…”

Then her lips twitch and she can’t hold back her smile. “I’m just fuckin’ with you, dude.”

“Oh,” he sighs, a hiss of relief.

“They’re too easy, kid,” she murmurs to her baby sister, still grinning. “Too easy. We’re gonna have so much fun, you and me.”

Joel feels his knees hit the back of the bed and he sags down, watching his children. There’s that pesky tightness in his throat and a fullness in his chest, and he distantly feels Charlie’s hand in his.

“But seriously…the kid needs a name,” Ellie says. She considers the baby thoughtfully, then softens. “What about…Anna?”

Joel digs deep into his tired memory. “After your mom?”

“Yeah,” Ellie says, then shrugs. “But she kinda looks like an Anna, too.”

Charlie smiles, squeezes his hand. “Anna? I like that.”

“Anna,” he agrees thickly, the only word he can choke out because he’s fucking crying again.

The first night passes in shifts. They don’t have a cradle, so they take turns holding the baby– Anna, he thinks, she has a name now, Anna –while she sleeps, in between feedings and diaper changes.

Joel knows he should sleep, but he doesn’t want to miss a second; Anna’s barely there weight in his arms, the way his hand spans her back, the softness of her downy head. She smells like her mother, all warm milk and honey. Sometimes she looks up at him with big, gray eyes that remind him of Sarah’s, and his heart cracks and mends itself and cracks again.

In the morning, he comes out of a doze to the sound of voices and the smell of food downstairs. Charlie is nudging him, baby at her breast.

“We have company. She’s done and I want to shower.”

He wipes at his eyes and takes the baby, holding her to his shoulder to rub her back. He whispers her name, marveling at how perfect it feels on his tongue.

Charlie moves slowly, visibly achy, and he gets up to wrap his free arm around her waist, giving her something to hold as she makes her way to the bathroom on wobbly legs.

“You okay?”

“Just sore. Hot water will help,” she murmurs, but she lets him lead her to the bath and leans on him when she strips out of her clothes.

He stays in the bathroom with the baby on his chest, trying and failing not to hover even when Charlie has stepped into the shower and turned on the water, steam rolling out from behind the curtain along with a groan of pleasure.

“I’m fine, Joel,” she says, poking her head out, then looking down at her feet with a grimace. “It’s a fucking bloodbath in here. You don’t need to see this.”

He leaves reluctantly, keeping the door cracked, then pulls out clothes–sweatpants, one of his t-shirts, underwear, wool socks, one of the thick cloth pads Maria must have brought up with all the other linens.

Anna begins to fuss, so he lays her on the bed and attempts to change her diaper, missing the ease of disposables and their velcro tabs.

“I know, kiddo, almost done,” he mutters as Anna protests the cold, kicking as he fumbles with the folds. It’s coming back to him slowly, the rhythm of the early days with Sarah familiar but also new. Eat, diaper, sleep, repeat.

After a thought, he pulls the yellow pajamas out of the nightstand and dresses her. The outfit is too big, bunching around her legs and arms, but he knows it won’t stay that way for long.

“Better?” he asks when she’s curled against his chest again, warm and soft in the fleecy pajamas. She doesn’t answer, of course, but she quiets, wide eyes blinking at nothing. He finds himself talking to her, low and slow as he paces.

“Been a long day, huh? Think you’ll let your mama sleep for a bit? You did a number on her. And me. Took your damn time,” he murmurs, smiling into her hair. “But that’s alright. Lotta folks excited to meet you, y’know.”

He doesn’t know how long Charlie has been watching from the bathroom doorway, wrapped in a towel, smiling faintly. Her eyes are dark-rimmed and there’s a trickle of blood dripping down her inner thigh, and he thinks she has never looked more beautiful.

She dresses slowly, then reaches for the baby, eyeing the yellow sleeper. “Where’d you get this?”

“Found it at the post a while ago,” he murmurs, ducking his head. “Reminded me of Sarah.”

“It’s perfect,” she smiles softly, then gives him a hesitant sniff, wrinkling her nose. “You need a shower, too.”

“That bad, huh?”

“Mmhm.”

The thought of being separated from them for even a minute makes his skin crawl, but he ducks into the bathroom and shucks off his clothes. He barely feels the water, probably doesn’t get the soap fully rinsed from his body and doesn’t care. Charlie has already taken Anna downstairs by the time he gets out, and he throws on sweats and a t-shirt, not bothering to comb his hair.

He hears their voices drifting up the stairwell—Tommy’s low rumble and Isabel’s toddler giggle and Maria’s soft cooing over the baby, Charlie and Ellie’s lighter tones mingling in.

The sounds stop him on the landing, where he grasps the railing and leans against the wall for support. For one bright, painful moment, he could swear he hears Sarah’s laughter among them.

#fanfic #fic recs #joel miller #the last of us hbo #the last of us #babyfic #pregnancy

123 notes · View notes

witchofhimring · 11 months ago

Text

Loyalty Chapter 10

Synopsis: Ellyn Baratheon is dead and Prince Aemond is plunged into grief. With a newborn son your life forever changes and destiny sets you on a darker path.

Pairings: Aemond Targaryen x Tyrell Reader

Aemond Targaryen x Ellyn Baratheon

Alys Rivers x Aemond Targaryen

Jaecerion Targaryen x Reader

Jason Lannister x Reader (minor)

(more to come!)

Y/n Tyrells Profiles

Warnings: Angst, heartbreak, childbirth, emotional turmoil, death, unrequited love?, humiliation by Ellyn Baratheon, marital abuse, marital consummation, misogamy (internalized as well as external), brief depictions of smut, moontea/abortions, suicide, mentions of rape (not to the reader), Plot twist at the end!

This chapter has mentions of rape and abortions (not inflicted on the reader), so be warned!

A great moan emanated from the forest. Great gusts of wind seemed to hail the birth of your son. Having enough, Lady Mari stormed over to the window and slammed it shut. The infants cries became even louder. Greedily you took in his appearance. He was your son through and through. Your hair, your eyes. In fact you hardly saw anything of Jason Lannister in him. Holding him close your fingers brushed the thin fuzz of hair upon his head. His tiny feet kicked out. "He is strong." You croaked out. With an aching throat you laughed. It was all over. All those months of fear and finally he was born. A son to succeed his father. But more importantly your child was safe. "What will you call him?" Alys Rivers asked. You wanted to name his one of your choosing. Normally it was up to the father. But Jason Lannister was dead and that right fell to him. And by the Gods it was your right. It was you who had borne him. "Owen Lannister." The name had suddenly come to you. Why you were not sure. But perhaps being a parent yourself brought on a burst of feeling towards your own. "Owen Lannister. A good name." Alys Rivers agreed.

The baby would lay with you. Overruling everyone else, you would have your son next to you. He had stopped crying after being fed. Jealously you watched the wet-nurse coo as she fed your son. "Don't you worry My Lady. This boy will grow strong and healthy. We have never failed a babe yet." The pain, in retrospect, had not been as bad as feared. There was still pain but it was all worth it. You watched your son be fed by the fire. Sleepily your eyes closed.

You sleep was not long. A conversation woke you and Lady Dara stood over you. She was breathless and had clearly ran all the way here. "Princess Ellyn has passed." The midwife clutched the babe to her breast and muttered a prayer. There was no such emotion on you face, there would be no show of grief. The woman who had tormented you for the past year was dead, another ghost for Harrenhal. No prayer was uttered from your lips, just as you had not lit a candle for Vaeron and Lucerys. "I see. Give Prince Aemond my condolences." Then you laid down and went to sleep. The covers were drawn up to cover your face. Smiling, you exhaled a great breath and made sure the midwife could not see the jubilation on your face. You did not care if it made you wicked. Ellyn had been a terror to you and been the architect of your misery. You still remembered the day she had made you undress her. All the public humiliations you endured at her hand. Once she had mocked your misery and talked of all the children she would bear Prince Aemond. All that had turned to ashes in her mouth and here you lay with a healthy baby boy while she lay dying. Ellyn had not known the delight of becoming a mother. Nor had she. That was something Ellyn did not have that as of now was out of reach.

To your great surprise Prince Aemond paid you a visit. He was haggard looking. Had Prince Aemond loved Ellyn, as he had never loved you? You did not entertain any notion that he had visited you out of caring. "He looks healthy." Prince Aemond's voice was strained. "He is. And I would have borne you a healthy son." But none of this you said aloud. The thought shamed you. The year had turned you into a bitter woman who thought more of scores than one of compassion. Prince Aemond seemed unsure of what to do. You noticed he bore new scars, one lining his left cheek. Where the rumors true? Had Prince Aemond truly set the Riverlands ablaze? Rumors were bound to arise is such times. Such as the one about King Aegon having his illegitimate children fighting in pits. You were not even sure Kings Landing had fighting pits. "I hope he is." The baby opened his eyes and opened his mouth in a big yawn. Such a little thing should be minuscule, but for you it was a fascination to behold. This beautiful baby boy was the most precious thing to ever exist. At least to you he was, but the same could be said of every mother.

"Where will I be going after this?" With Kings Landing in enemy hands your future there was no clear path. No. It was not just your. Everyone's future was uncertain, and no one was likely to have a happy one. A new fear dwelt within you. Your own mortality had always been a factor you considered. While your possible death had always been a terrifying prospect it was nothing compared to the fear for Owen. If your son died how would you ever survive? This boy....this tiny human not yet a whole week old had your allegiance. From now on you would work for his welfare.

Prince Aemond was still there. Right now you wanted to be left alone with Owen. "I would like to spend time with my son, My Prince." "I-" Prince Aemond cut himself off, and nodded. There was a tenseness in his jaw you could not quite understand. "I will leave you to it." With another nod of his head Prince Aemond was gone. With a weary sigh you rested the baby against your chest. The white blanket had been crafter by Lady Mari. She had sewn lions onto the rim. You appreciated her craft and desired to thank Lady Mari. Maybe later, when you were not so tired. In the mean time you would wander the realm of sleep, where pools of blood and Weirwood trees awaited.

These dreams no longer frightened you like they once did. But you would never get used to the voices that wailed in your ears. And unlike normal dreams you remembered every moment of it. The dawn did not make them fade away into nothing. At first you had not wanted to believe it. Bad dreams like these brought only bad things. It felt like if you were to admit that then those things would happen. To much of this felt so real, waking up to stinging skin. Hearing voices in the trees. Either you were going bad or something otherworldly was happening. Neither was appealing. But what could you do? They would either call you made or take you for a witch. If things stayed as they were, only dreams and whispers, you might be alright. But curiosity was a powerful thing. As was fear. If some malevolent spirit was after you then why? A curse of some sort? But who would do such a thing? Ellyn might have, had she possessed such power. Though she may not be the only contender. There were stories of Gods who punished arrogant mortals. In their anger the Gods may have sought to punish you. The thought only angered you. What had they done to inspire devotion within you? They, immortal beings, dwelt high above while humanity suffered. Bitter, you cursed them in your heart.

You had perused most of Harrenhal's books by this point. Despite the size of the library only a few were actually fit for reading. They were either damaged due to age or poor keep and the rest were written in languages you were not privy to. A few weeks after your childbirth you were once more free to look amongst the shelves. Beforehand the task had fallen to Alys Rivers. After being kept in your room for so long going out was a joy. It was only too bad the grounds were closed off. It had been months since you had been able to be beyond the castle walls.

Baby Owen rested on your lap as the last birds took flight. Your sons birth had been sent out and Casterly Rock had replied. They would send a retinue to take your son to his rightful place. The only thing that worried you was that there was only mention of his departure, not yours. Perhaps it was only a slip up. You had sent word to Lady Joan about the next course of action. Her reply was not what you hoped. Only that her grandchild was doing well and that finally your deceased husbands brother had a son. Apparently Lady Joan wished to betroth her granddaughter to the newborn Lannister babe. "We must grow strong." Was what she wrote. Though your anxiety was great, so long as Prince Aemond lived you would be safe.

"Which book today?" Alys Rivers took a seat beside you. Being tired of your room, you took a small circular room in the tower that had been utterly abandoned. Pillows had been propped up on the window stood. The view was spectacular, you could see the run rise far in the distance. This tallest part of Harrenhal allowed you to see far and wide. Only on Vaehgar had you such a view. Owen slept in his cradle at your feet. His hair had darkened slightly and as each day went by they said "oh, he looks just like his sire!" you could have scoffed. Owen Lannister was clearly all you. Though you never said any of these words out loud.

Alys Rivers walked over to the babe and crouched down. One long finger pressed against his wrist. "He is a beautiful babe." You smiled. Of course he was. Alys Rivers looked at you, then back at the babe, then to you once more. "They told me he looks like Ser Jason Lannister. Although I think he takes after you." The comment brought a mixture of pride, surprise and affection for Alys. It could have risen out of pure loneliness, but it felt nice to have Alys around.

For a moment you watched Alys coo over the baby. Owen opened his eyes and gazed up at the woman above him. Suddenly a tiny hand came out and seized one of her black locks. "Oh, oh my goodness! I am sorry!" Alys laughed as you rushed forward to pry the babies hand away. Because Owen was so little his strength was next to nothing. "Babies will do that. Once this little boy was in my charge, Henry was his name, and by the time he was done with me it was a miracle I had any hair left!" Your own hair was lose and it occurred to you that such as style may be unsuitable in the future. There was a sad look of Alys's face. Once more you wondered about the possible children she lost. Then you considered "what if the children lost were not solely hers?". If Alys had been the castle wet nurse then some of the children would have not been hers by blood. They said Prince Aemond slaughtered every person that bore the name Strong. Had one of those killed at one point been cared for by Alys? Such a thought was unpleasant and you put it away. There was no proof of that, no need to cause yourself unnecessary grief.

Alys finally looked at the book you were reading. It was titled "Gods of Westeros", a book that was controversial in the eyes of the sept. Even you, whos faith wavered, felt slightly uneasy dabbling in what one could call borderline heresy. Alys stood and and sat next to you. "Which Gods?" "The Seven, of course, the Old Gods kept by the First Men, Mother Rhoyne, The Drowned God, R'hllor God of Light. That is all I have come across." You turned the page. "The Great Other" was the next chapter. Familiar drawings of White Walkers crept out at you. "Have you hears of The Great Other?" You shook your head. Alys turned the page. "The God of R'hllor, worshiped by the Red Priestesses. They say the night is dark and full of terrors. The God R'hllor will burn away the darkness. The Greater Other, is his opposite, a God of cold and darkness." "Who worships these Gods?" "Few in Westeros, mostly in Essos." "What of The Great Other?" Alys shuddered. "Only The Others would serve such a God." You wanted to ask which Gods Alys served. The question seemed rude and invasive so you abstained. The idea of Alys being a heathen unsettled you. Though were you in a position to judge?

That night dead corpses haunted your dreams. And a rustling that sounded like the wings of death came ever closer.

You watched them lay Ellyn into the ground. With Storms End blocked off escorting the princesses corpse there was not an option. So she would have to make due with Harrenhal. A kinder woman might have felt sad. As Ellyn was lowered into the ground and the septon spoke all you could think of were her taunts and jeers. You wondered if she knew you gave birth to a boy. A dark part of you fancied that it was despair over your sons birth that carried Ellyn off, spitting bile as bitter as her words. Your eyes went to Prince Aemond, standing over where his wife lay. There was a coldness to him. A rage in his eyes. Beside him stood Lady Maris Baratheon, clad in black and standing suspiciously near Prince Aemond. One of her hands rested on his arm. It would not surprise anyone is Prince Aemond married another of house Baratheon to keep their allegiance. Would it be Lady Maris with a sharp wit or her sisters? They said that Lady Floris Baratheon was very beautiful, having only just celebrated her nineteenth name day. Lady Cassandra was said to be shy, but beautiful as well. What had attracted Prince Aemond to Ellyn? None had made mention of her beauty and you only knew of Ellyn's spite. Perhaps she could be charming, just not to you.

When Owen started to fuss it gave you an excuse to leave. A nursemaid and Alys followed you inside. The nursemaid fed Owen and you dismissed her. It felt good to walk about the castle again. "What happened in this room?" It was on one of the upper levels. Do not ask which one, counting them was hard. This one was larger than the rest and must have been used to house someone important. "Ser Lyonel and Harwin's." A sudden chill ran through you. Lord Lyonel and his won had been burned alive in these rooms. Whether by vengeful ghosts or an enemy you could not say. "Well, let us get going." As if there was a hurry to go anywhere. The next room you ventured into had once been used as a sort of office. Prince Aemond had briefly used it but feeling uneasy in those rooms chose different ones. There was still a desk and chair, forlornly forgotten in this wing of the castle. Banners hung on the walls. "Where these houses that ruled Harrenhal?" "Yes." Now that was not necessarily true. House Hoare who ruled before Aegon's Conquest was unceremoniously left out. House Qoherys, with its x and four skulls. a bad omen of things to come as that house met a bad end. The Harroway family met an even more horrid end. Maegor the Cruel had slaughtered all who bore the name Harroway when his wife Queen Alys bore a malformed creature. The black tower in flames, an imposing sigil for any house. The next house also had towers, though less impressive. The Towers did not last long, even less when you consider the fact that Rhaena Targaryen took over its keep for a time. Poor Princess Rhaena, who might have been Queen ended her days in these halls. As sad fate for anyone, especially for one who was called Queen of the West. Lastly were the Strongs with their symbol of the Tridents three forks. How long Housed Strong would last was anyone's guess. Larys Strong had no heirs, and he was the last of them. Unless one were to count Jeoffrey Velayron who was truly Harwin's son. But his parentage could never be acknowledged, he was a bastard anyway.

" I remember Ser Lyonel working in this room. My job, when I was not doing my duty to the children was to serve the Lord." "Were there very many children in Harrenhal?" Somehow the idea of children in Harrenhal seemed preposterous. Baby Owen fussed. Harrenhal wiped out those who lived there, their lines obliterated. "We do not rule Harrenhal." You told yourself. "More than you would think. There were never many noble children racing around. But there were plenty of servants with children. Every morning I would wake up and run to this room and that. I remember most of the children. Sweet things they were. I remember a little girl called Dania, tiny little girl, with a beautiful smile and blue eyes. Though not all of them were small. Harwin Strong-" Both of you did a double take. Had you misheard? "A different one." Alys quickly said. You laughed to dispel the tension but it did not wholly go away. The room was quickly abandoned.

Whispers were coming from the Red Keep that Rhaenyra's base was quacking. Kings Landing was starving and the Black Queen, as they had taken to calling her, had holed herself up. There were even rumors of a falling out with her husband. How much of this was true or not was unclear. But Otto Hightower always said the man was perverse. There was hope Kings Landing would fall soon. For months Rhaenyra had held out but the situation was not looking good. Jaecerion had been ruling Casterly Rock in the absence of your son. It eased your mind, as some might want to displace Owen. The betrothal of Lady Jenna Florent to your newborn nephew named Lord Jason after his uncle went ahead. They were young but when they turned fourteen the couple would marry and live as husband and wife. At first it was alarming when betrothal letter came in for your son. Lord Hobert had even offered the hand of his granddaughter. Quite a splendid match, Lannister and Hightower. It might have even been the one you chose. Only two days previously a letter smuggled in was sent and penned on the request of King Aegon offering the hand of his daughter Princess Jaehaera The thought thrilled you, a Targaryen Princess for your son! "What do you say to that my love?" Your son snoozed away, completely unaware of the magnificent future his mother had planned. When you went to bed that night there were dragons, crowns, and children with silver hair.

"Another flight?" Lady Dara and yourself watched Vhaegar land. Prince Aemond had returned from this newest expedition. Everyone wore grim expressions. A smoky substance emanated from the old dragons mouth, a telltale sign that Vhaegar had been setting something on fire. But what had she been burning? Whispers spoke of families up in smoke. Lives snuffed out before they had truly begun. Prince Aemond himself was not unhurt either. He bore wounds, though none too serious. The days were Prince Aemond would come to you to patch up his cuts and bruises were long gone. These days he would have a maester to wait upon him. "It is getting cold, come." Lady Dara followed you inside. You made sure Owen was sound asleep, which he still way. He was looking cuter by the day, more plum with such pretty eyes. The warmth against your chest brought on a fierce maternal love for this baby.

Just ahead of you strode Lady Maris with her own ladies. Realizing both of you were about to cross paths you politely nodded. She returned the gesture but there was something calculated in her look. You would have expected anger, after all, she was Ellyn's sister. But surprisingly there was none of that. Her ladies had been discrete. Whether that boded good or ill you did not know. When you got back to the bedroom a wet nurse quickly took Owen off your hands to feed him. Lady Mari was sewing by the fire and once more Lady Clarisssa was absent. "Where is Lady Clarissa?" It was not that you had a great need for her at the moment. Her frequent disappearances had made you feel uneasy. Lady Dara and Lady Mari shared looks. Whatever had fallen upon Lady Clarissa they did not want to divulge. Quickly you dismissed the nursemaid, taking back you son. Owen, often sleepy after feeding was quick to leave the waking world.

"What has happened to Lady Clarissa?" It was your duty as their mistress to be informed of ladies wellbeing's. Lady Dara's hands clasped together, locking like iron. A look of apprehension crossed Lady Mari's face. They looked to one another until it became to much for Lady Mari. "We were on your way to Harrenhal when brigands attacked out carriage. And they stopped us and eventually knights came. But by then..." The words were too horrible to speak and she did not need to. A hand to your mouth, the information settled into horror. Poor Lady Clarissa. And you had no idea. "Is....is there anything I can do to help?" It felt silly to ask. What could you possibly do to comfort a woman who had undergone such an ordeal? When Lady Mari took a deep breath you heart dropped. There was more to come. "Lady Clarissa is with child, we think." You gasped. It was one thing to be raped. To be pregnant made it so much worse. While a woman might conceal the fact she lay with a man outside the confines of marriage, to be pregnant changed things. No one would care that it was rape and not of Lady Clarissa's will. They would judge her just the same. "How far along?" "About three months." Taking a deep breath you closed your eyes. "Someone will need to retrieve moontea from the maester." Lady Dara suddenly shook her head. "He will know. And if he does then it is more likely Lady Clarissa will be shamed." You had to think. So long as this whole issue could be kept private then Lady Clarissa could still be saved. As you were not the lady of this castle the maester was not required to obey. That fell to Prince Aemond. "I will go ask the Prince." "Don't!" The pitch of Lady Maris voice made you and Lady Dara jump. "The prince may not help, if he thinks the act is of her own volition." But there was no other choice. It was that or Lady Clarissa's downfall.

"You are quite sure this was rape?" You scowled at Prince Aemond. "Lady Clarissa is a woman of good character. I do not see why she would sully her name is such a way." You were so worried he would say no. Then, if that were the case, Lady Clarissa's situation would be worse. Perhaps Prince Aemond would kick her out. That would absolutely not happen, Lady Clarissa would not be another Elinor. Prince Aemond got up to his feet. You noticed his left hand was bandaged. When he set it down Prince Aemond hissed in pain. "Have you seen a maester for that?" You inquired. "Yes. Now let us go so the maester. And send a servant to fetch Lady Clarissa.

The maester's rooms were in another tower, inconveniently. Maester Whells was younger than most maesters with thinning brown hair. "So you say the lady is around three months?" "Yes. About that time." You replied. The maester pulled out a role of parchment and wrote something down. The door opened and a pale faced Lady Clarissa stumbled in. "Clarissa, it is quite alright. We will help you." You gently took Lady Clarissa by her elbows and she was steered to the nearest chair. The maester scrutinized Lady Clarissa with steely eyes. "You say this was the result of an attack?" There was a not of incredulity in his voice. "You speak as if this is an anomaly. Tell me Maester Whells, tell us how we women can avoid rape during war, for we would all like to hear it." Under the harshness of his gaze the maester had the good grace to look embarrassed. Lady Clarissa's hand trembled in yours. "I..well..I will need to examine that Lady. Prince Aemond and Lady Y/n, if you could leave the room." Lady Clarissa vigorously shook her head. "My Lady it is highly irregular for-" But you interrupted him. "I will stay." Prince Aemond was quick to leave. Lady Clarissa was undressed and made to wear a thin gown. She lay there on the bed, spread legged and frightened. When Maester Whells pulled out a familiar looking device you said "why is that being brought out?!" "I must check to see how far along she is." As Maester Whells inserted it into Lady Clarissa she cried out and squeezed your hand. Those ten seconds seemed to last forever until Lady Clarissa was finally allowed to sit up. Lastly, she peed in a bowl and was told to redress. By the end she was no longer shaking but look so tired. You sent her to bed and ordered food to be brought. The atmosphere you returned to was tense. Although the wet nurses had no idea they felt the anxiety. Lady Dara, Lady Mari and yourself were quiet all evening. Only Owen made any noise. Dinner was little better. Prince Aemond sat at the head overlooking a small court. The ladies of Lady Maris's retinue, and those who once belonged to Ellyn, quietly stole looks. They would look your way, and then pretend not to. You prayed none of them found out.

It was a blessed relief to dive under the covers. Lady Dara would be your companion tonight. Sleep came in its usual form, with bloody dreams and voices. You were pulled here and there, with no will of your own. The howling grew greater and soon it overwhelmed you. It plunged you into a pool of blood, unable to get out. But somehow in the midst of all that blood there were little butterfly wings.

Two days later the matter of Lady Clarissa's pregnancy had to be addressed. A closely guarded secret, Maester Whells, Prince Aemond, Lady Clarissa and yourself were the only ones privy to this meeting. "At three months this is the latest I would encourage one to rid themselves of the baby. But it should be quick and not too painful in this case My Lady." "Lady Clarissa?" Lady Clarissa was sitting next to you, still as a statue. Even after two days of rest she still looked haggard. "I need...I need time." Her voice was barely more than a whisper. "My Lady, I am afraid time is something we have little of. How I administer the moon tea depends on how far along the babe is. Frankly, I am not comfortable inducing a labor past the fourth month." Lady Clarissa looked like to faint. You placed a hand on her shoulder to stop her from swaying. "Think about it. We will continue this in the morning." Maester Whells looked ready to protest. "Please, she needs it." You were worried because Lady Clarissa was sporting a green hue. The pallor one took before throwing up. Helping her from the chair, you lead Lady Clarissa outside. Prince Aemond and Maester Whells followed, speaking all the time. As the group left you though there was the patter of fear. Shaking your head, you convinced yourself it was an affliction of the imagination.

That assumption was a grave mistake on your part. Whispers were racing around the hall, ones that made your heart stop cold. It was on the way down to breaking your fast that the whole day would be spoiled. Only spoiled was not strong enough for the absolute heartbreak that would render itself upon Harrenhal. Two women were gossiping on the staircase. Paying no mind you continued down until a name cropped up. "Lady Clarissa-well she is no true lady from what I hear-" It was then that both women realized who was next to them. "What did you say? Speak up!" They flinched but you did not care. You went right up to one of them, a tall black haired woman. "What is your name?" She did not want to tell, but could not dismiss a direct order from you. "Lady Ellois Dondarrion." "Lady Dondarrion. And why is Lady Dondarrion gossiping about Lady Clarissa?" Lady Dondarrion was biting her lip. "They are all talking about it, not just me. Lady Clarissa is with child." Internally you cursed. Who had told?! "Where did you hear this information?" "It was not me who overheard. I am not sure who, only that Lady Swann told me this morning." "Which Lady Swann?" "Lady Bella Swann, My Lady." You were livid. The impulse to throw Lady Dondarrion and her companion down the stairs was strong. Instead of that, you departed, leaving both women frozen. You did not know who Lady Bella Swann was but she would feel your wrath.

After breaking your fast Lady Swann was summoned. You chose the nearest drawing-room as an audience space. Sitting in a chair and flanked by ladies you hoped to intimidate this Lady Bella Swann. The woman entered, only one could say she was more a child than woman. A tiny thing, she did not even look fully developed. "How old are you, Lady Swann?" She flushed and bobbed a quick curtsy. "Ten and three, My Lady." Suddenly the idea of intimidating this lady made you uncomfortable. "Take a seat. Lady Dara could you?" Nervously Lady Swann sat down. "I hear that a rumor has been going around about one of my ladies. Lady Ellois Dondarrion says that it was you who told her." Lady Swann looked ready to cry. "Who do you serve?" "I grew up serving Lady Joan Tyrell, I served the Princess Ellyn, now I serve Lady Maris Baratheon." You leaned back in the chair. Was this a plot by Lady Maris to unseat you? For a lady's women were extensions of herself and could be judged for their misdemeanors. "Where did you overhear this information?" "I overheard the Prince and Maester Whells, My Lady." So it was her who started this whole affair. Suddenly any sympathy you held for Lady Dondarrion evaporated. "Do you realize what you have done? A lady's reputation is torn because of you." Tears welled up in Lady Dondarrion's brown eyes. "Plesase....I'm sorry I did not mean to..." You did not care to read the rest. This little idiot might be young, but younger girls had more sense. The idea that this may not be a simple slip but a plot did occur. If Lady Maris wished to settle a score then getting rid of Clarissa was a good way to do it. Rising to your feet, all the ladies curtsied. "Lady Dondarrion, this information will be brought to the Prince. Pray he takes it to mind to be merciful. The woman stumbled out. "My Lady, it may not-" Lady Mari put up a hand. "I will not spare sympathy for those who set out to ruin the lives of others."

"Everyone knows." You sat opposite from Alys who was rocking you son. Owen had fallen asleep, the fire glinting on his hair. Today Alys bore ill new. It was none too surprising but dreadful nevertheless that Clarissa's condition had spread. Clarissa had refused to leave her room by now. You spent time trying to coax her out. Eventually you sent in a septa who might ease her pain. It being late, you headed to your room and spent the evening with Alys. A howling wind was raging inside, the shutters shuddered in its place. You would look at Owen, worried that he may be disturbed. But for today you were safely tucked away.

"Could I get you something to read?" Alys put Owen back into the crib. "No. Let us just sit." Worried over Clarissa and the war, you could not bully your brain into concentration. The maid opened the door carrying a steaming bowl of meat and bread. "Ah, dinner. Put it over there I will be out in a moment." You waiting until the maid was gone. The floor was cold and you considered requesting a carpet. You and Alys took places by the fire. Extra food had been supplied for Alys. By now most knew she spent the evenings with you. It was strange, but her presence made you feel less lonely. The past year had been so isolating that companionship was desperately craved. Even from someone like Alys, a commoner and bastard. Yet even so, if the past year had not happened you might still have sought out her company. She was the most engaging person you had ever met. "Poor Clarissa." You forlornly closed bleary eyes. "A sad thing. Unfortunately too common. Even before the war, so many women would arrive pregnant or child in arms. And yet everyone acts scandalized despite the frequency." "But Clarissa's prospects are ruined. There is no way she can just have this child and move on? Clarissa's family will likely abandon her." "They won't help her? But they are a great family. Surely they could lend a hand." "Unfortunately, Alys, being a great family means they are that more ruthless. Even to their own kin." Alys pondered your words and gazed into the fire.

"It is a strange thought." Alys's eyes looked bright in the light, her paleness illuminated. Like two great emeralds placed against a smooth opal. "Men can father a hundred bastards and none blink an eye. But a girl gets pregnant through...well you know, and is suddenly a pariah. You know I have always felt sorry for Rhaenyra." Shocked, any sleepiness was banished. "Rhaenyra Targaryen? What, the Black Queen?!" The last part you spat out. "But have you never thought about it?" Alys was still not looking at you, her eyes still on the fire. Perhaps her thoughts were a thousand miles from here, so engrossed that she was not aware of the surroundings. "Thought about what?" You looked towards the door. This was not a conversation you wanted anyone to overhear. After what happened with Clarissa one could never be too careful. Getting up, you wanted to the door and opened it. The hallway was empty. "Does the King not have bastards?" Alys said as you sat down. What she said was true. Everyone knew King Aegon had silver-haired bastards all over Kings Landing. "The King has numerous bastards while Rhaenyra has only three. And at least she cares for hers. Is it not odd that women are punished for what men take as their due."

You had never thought about it like that. The situations were familiar in a sense. "Rhaenyra chose to sleep outside the confines of marriage. Cassandra was raped." Alys made a nod of acknowledgment. "But if she were not? Would she deserve to be harassed and abandoned by her families." You could not bring yourself to say yes. It was the way of the world. If one had asked you if a woman should be shunned for such foolish actions a year ago you might have said yes. But now the notion felt....icky. It was true that while men such as King Aegon and Jason Lannister fathered scores of bastards a woman could be ruined by just one. You thoughts went to Lady Redwyne. Was she shunned by her family to? You had never thought to ask. Did they whisper about her in the halls as they did Clarissa? While you had never been pregnant through an affair there were those who scorned you. Thinking you were Prince Aemond's mistress some had shunned you. Although your name had been cleared and most scored Ellyn for the rumors you would never forget. Your friends from Kings Landing had hardly sent any letters at all.

"That is true, and I suppose it is unfair. But she is trying to pass off a baby that is not her husbands. And the next heir must be legitimate." "I suppose your point has merit. This society is based upon legitimacy." Alys looked like she wanted to say more but judged it unwise. Owen saved you from the awkward tension by getting fussy. His wails increased in pitch and you quickly scooped him up. "Shall I get the wet nurse?" You shook your head. "Just give me time alone with him." Long after Alys left, her words remained.

"Has she eaten today?" Lady Mari and yourself stood outside Clarissa's door. Clarissa lay on her bed, pale and death with tangled blonde locks. Two weeks and her behavior had hardly changed. Maester Whells was becoming impatient and wanted her to decide. "She may lose the baby and be spared making a decision." Lady Mari's knuckles were red with rubbing. She had been up all night on vigil for Clarissa. "And has she eaten?" "A little bread. But I doubt it shall account for much." Both of you looked in on the sleeping woman. "Let us get her something appetizing and send for a maester. And you looked tire Lady Mari. Rest for a bit." Lady Mari nodded and went in the direction of her room. You on the other hand went to find a maid. Afterwards you went to the maester and told him to check on Clarissa.

A sudden wave of exhaustion came over you. Clarissa's state made been an all consuming worry. It did not help that Harrenhal's very being put the bravest of souls on edge. You pushed the door open to find an apprehensive wet-nurse and Prince Aemond holding your son. You froze feeling a mixture of alarm and fear. Why Prince Aemond holding your son brought about fear you did not know. Just that the sight of your son in his arms disconcerting. Prince Aemond seemed to sense your feeling for he immediately dispensed Owen into your arms. "Hello lovely." You smiled down at Owen. His little eyes opened and registered you. A happy coo left his mouth and you trace Owen's brow. He had grown strong in a past month. The wet-nurse said he fed well and would grow into a fine strong man. "He looks like you." Prince Aemond commented. You would have thought it mere flatter if not for the fact it was very true. There was hardly any Jason Lannister in his son's face. "I know." You cradled the baby close. "You named him after your father. I remember as children you promised to name a boy after him." A long time ago, practically centuries ago (at least for you) you and Prince Aemond had talked about children. In those dreams you imagined the children with platinum hair. But such fantasies were of no use now. "Leave us." Prince Aemond ordered the wet-nurse. It was not just Prince Aemond, the baby, and you.

"Y/n. Daemon Targaryen will be upon Harrenhal soon." "So I suppose it will be time to leave soon." "Yes." "To Casterly Rock?" Prince Aemond shook his head. "No. Highgarden." You had not seen Highgarden in years. The memories were blurry and so far away. You remembered certain smells, noises and how it felt to wander through those great gardens. "Why not Casterly Rock?" "It is not safe there Y/n. The Ironborn will likely attack again and brigands travel the roads. Rhaenyra is still calling for your head and Casterly Rock is in little position to defend dragons due to the conflict." "I thought the Tyrells were neutral in this war." "Yes, well, you will be smuggled in and hidden." The baby snorted through his little nose. A Lannister in Highgarden. The Kings of the Reach and Lannisters of Casterly Rock once fought together against House Targaryen. They had burned for it. Perhaps the Tyrell's would not hold Owen being a Lannister against him. If life had gone differently you would have been Lady Tyrell and Highgarden would have been home. "When is this supposed to happen?" "When they arrive. During war there is no certainty of when." "Very well. I shall inform my ladies." You turned to leave but Prince Aemond called out. "Yes, My Prince?" He seemed to be struggling for the right words. Prince Aemond's jaw was tense making the gaunt features of his face more prominent. You noticed the dark shapes under his eye. The thin leather on his body did not hide the exhausted bearing of its keeper.

Waiting for him to speak, you focused on the babe. "Can we sit? My legs are tired. Childbirth had taken a toll on your body. Moving about was no longer an unconscious effort. You only hoped that your body would resolve itself soon. Placing the babe in a crib beside the chair you sat down. Prince Aemond's leather creaked as he did the same. "We have not talked in a while." Prince Aemond was not looking at you, but at thin boney hands. Once these hands were pale with a tinge of pink and callouses. These days they were akin to bones. "Are you well?" Much to your displeasure there was genuine concern there. Maybe not what it once was but still there. You were not entirely sure what to think about that. One one hand there was displeasure at this weakness. On the other to lose every part of yourself would be a great sadness. "The war has been hard on us all." Was his unsatisfactory reply. A few more minutes of silence passed before Prince Aemond continued. "Your....friendship has waned." Was he blaming you for this?! "I am not sure waned is the word I would use. Perhaps completely obsolete is the word." You hoped you came off as cold rather than sulky. "I am not blaming you. I just feel this is a matter of importance." You gave a derisive snort that on any other occasion would have been embracing. Decorum was the furthest thing on your mind. And could anyone blame you? After years of friendship Prince Aemond had thrown you to the side. It had been so easy for him, a constant torment for you. "Why do you suddenly care?" Prince Aemond's face was still obscured. "I always have." Your hand twitched in irritation. "I doubt it." "I never meant to hurt you." "Much good that has done me." "Y/n please." But there was no pity in you. No matter how sad he looked you would not give way.

"Do you have any idea what it was like for me!? The constant humiliation I suffered while you continued on. Both of us were under suspicion yet only I suffered its affects. I have been by your side through everything. All those years. But you threw me to the wolves and abandoned me! As if I were nothing! So do not think for a second that any words will fix anything." You felt so light yet so heavy at that moment. These were words you had kept in for a year. To get it out was such a relief. But you were not done yet. "And your wife! Did you hear the things she did? All the rumors she spread and her constant torment. Did you know she had be undress her on your wedding night? Well, I suppose a woman you just met is more important than a friend of many years." The last part you spat out like a curse. Prince Aemond was still staring at his hands, still not looking up.

"Y/n, I am sorry-" You did not want to hear it. You would not hear it! Did Prince Aemond think an apology would fix anything? "Please leave." Prince Aemond finally lifted his head. To your alarm you saw tears in his eyes. There were not flowing like a waterfall but his eyes were bright. He looked to be in physical pain. Never before had you seen Prince Aemond tremble, but here he was. You reached for a bowl of warm water and a towel. Handing it to Prince Aemond you sat back down. Prince Aemond took off his eyepatch and held the towel to his eye. "I apologize if my words have cause you pain." It felt churlish not to say so. No matter how angry you were his pain still brought sympathy. "I think a maester may be of better use than I." The anger was gone. You hated to admit it but there was guilt. Whether it was warranted or not remained unclear. Your thoughts about Prince Aemond had been all over the place. You needed time alone, away from Prince Aemond. Perhaps you would never be able to face him again.

Prince Aemond left. Whatever might have happened one could not say. Not this time at least.

Notes:

Ladies and Gentlemen (are there any gentlemen is the crowd?), part one of this story is near completion. Just a few more chapters (about 3-4) and then the shitshow known as part 2 begins. You will notice that the reader drops "Rivers" when referring to Alys as a way of showing their deepening bond. I promise that Alys's motivations will be revealed in time, but that will have to wait. In the last chapter a few people asked if Aemond was in love with reader. The answer is no (thought this may change), at least not in a romantic way. Reader was his first friend and constant companion. He will always carry something for her regardless of time. When the reader referred to Aemond as a kinslayer in the last chapter it hurt because out of everyone, to hear it from Y/n was too much. We will also be getting an Aemond pov soon.

Also I made a mistake when it came to Y/n's family tree. I named her cousins wife Lady Joan when originally I named her Jenna. I will be going to change all the Joan's to Jenna's so I have that to look forward to. Also I named Laura Reed as a mother to readers father Owen Tyrell. Laura Reed is actually the mother of her mother. Bit of a whoops because Laura Reed being the mother to Amelia Tarley is important for this story.

About the magic. I had a bit of difficulty when it came to introducing magic as a plot device for this book because I was more focused on reader's relationships. But keep in mind that the magic aspect is very important to this book.

I honestly can't believe we have gotten this far into the book and I want to thank everyone who had read, liked and commented on my story!

Happy New Year!

If you want to join the taglist please let me known!

@daenerysqueenofhearts

@le-petit-lulu

@aemondswifeisme

@mandiiblanche

@gknj9495

@minakay

@strangersunghoon

@iilsenewman

@moonlightfoxx

@gknj9495

@heartb8k2

@dahlias-and-marigolds

87 notes · View notes

diazsdimples · 7 months ago

Text

About Me!

Hi! Welcome to my blog! Here's some stuff about me/ what you can expect!

My name is James (he/him)

I'm 23 and an Aries

I'm from New Zealand

I'm also a musician and play cello and piano/ also sing.

I'm a student midwife and will talk about this occasionally cause it's HECTIC and I love it.

My asks are ALWAYS open (send me HCs, fic requests, general thoughts and opinions) but I will call you out if you're being a dick in them.

I write fics and you can find my masterlist here!

I write primarily for Buddie but am writing a lot of Bucktommy/Buddietommy these days

I ship both Buddie and Bucktommy, as well as Buddietommy and Eddietommy.

I take fic requests and prompts but these can sometimes take a hot second for me to complete

Current wips are: Frostpunk AU (Buddie), Single Dads AU (Buddie), Sleepy Mornings (Buddie), Olympics AU (Bucktommy), Disaster Date Fic (Buddietommy/Eddietommy) Ballet AU (Buddietommy), Dr's AU (Buddie), Ranch AU (Bathena, with 2 seperate spinoffs, buddie and bucktommy)

I write a lot of smut and therefore my blog is R18. If you're under 18, please do not interact.

Pro-palestine, pro-choice, pro-LGBT rights, anti-racism, etc. If you take issue with any of the stances, see yourself out :)

#about me #about james #james says things #911 author #911 blog #buddie author

44 notes · View notes

phoenixyfriend · 2 years ago

Text

Star Wars Omegaverse Recs

Here's a couple solid omegaverse fics. This list is shorter than most of the ones I write but Meh.

Stars are for my favorites.

⭐ The Rain Fell Already by @loosingmoreletters: variation on Jedi Indentured AU containing omegaverse. Xanatos is omega Qui-Gon's bio kid but nothing changes, depressing but poignant

House Call by @elthadriel: two idiots knot while on medication that requires no knotting because it can get stuck for literal hours. Kix has to help and he is very annoyed about it

Status Quo by @captainkirkk: (G-rated) Anakin responds to Obi-Wan in a "you are my dad" way and the clones are surprised pikachu about it

⭐ Temporary Like Achilles by @intermundia: standard-ish fuck-or-die scenario where both sides are like "I can't take advantage of you/I just took advantage of you" because of course they are. (This author has a lot of solid Obikin, but they have me blocked (no I don't know why) so I can't tag them.)

⭐ He Said Yes by @threebea: (G-rated) B!Quinlan and O!Obi-Wan get mated for Obi-Wan's safety, the nature of their relationship is unclear to basically everyone (romantic? qp? other? unclear)

venus flytrap by IntoThineHands: Sith!Obi, role reversal of trope standard (omega deliberately takes advantage of an alpha)

Bite of Caramel by @thewriterowl: A!Jango needs a date to the family reunion, asks O!Obi-Wan to accompany him

⭐ good things in threes by @galateagalvanized: Codywan accidental pregnancy after O!Obi-Wan's implant gets nullified by an overpowered EMP (along with Cody's brain chip)

all my roads lead back to you by @tennessoui: idiots to lovers comedy (modern au, Obi-Wan got pregnant in a one-night stand across the country with a bartender who kind of looked like Anakin, because he's in love with his roommate but can't come clean and so hooks up with guys who look like him, and Anakin is in love with Obi-Wan enough that he's decided to be the Dad Who Stepped Up to this kid because anything Obi-Wan makes is part of Obi-Wan and obviously deserving of adoration)

The Theory of Letting Go by @ifonlyweknewwhatiwasdoing: never a Jedi!Anakin, Padme dead of uterine rupture, Obi-Wan hormonally addled and insistent on taking care of the twins like they're his own

The Swan Serenade by @shatouto: heavily AU, Mando!Anakin and Jedi-but-more-like-real-world-monks!Obi. (Has the most adorable art in the end of chapter notes, btw)

For Safekeeping by @glimmerglanger: Sith O!Obi-Wan feels safe because of the army of clones, which is the first time he's felt safe enough to have a heat, ends up fucked by his army of betas

when the snow falls we will wrap ourselves in furs by @hornet394: the fic I reread that had me going "I want Rex with O!Anakin but being in character" because this is one of the few omegaverse Rexwalkers that hits that button for me (though it's technically Anakin/501st poly stuff)

⭐ Find a little stranger by @obimanletkenobi: Villain!Obidala, both alphas, find Anakin at an omega auction, decide to ask him to play surrogate for their child since they can't do it themselves (with the offer to drop him off on a random planet with a wiped memory and enough cash to start a new life as a free man if he doesn't want to get pregnant), followed by smut

Belonging by IronCannon: this is the OTHER solid omegaverse Rexwalker

⭐ Conceal Me by @himboskywalker: longfic that is VERY good imo and builds the tension incredibly. Anakin is an omega pretending to be an alpha (literally the only people alive that know he's omega are his mother and the midwife). Senator Obi-Wan is an alpha pretending to be a beta (for weird reasons relating to his parents being kind of insane). They get married for politics, suggested by Palpatine because he found out about Obi-Wan being an alpha but not about Anakin, and decided a forced alpha/alpha marriage was going to self-destruct and help destabilize the Republic further.

Both by @obimanletkenobi: Anakin is the omegaverse equivalent of intersex and this explores the ways he's fetishized and discriminated against by the culture around him.

Peachy the Series by @the-writing-mill: IDK what to say, if you want 15k of O!Obi-Wan getting absolutely railed by two alphas, this is the fic for you

⭐ Packed Together Like Test Tubes also by @the-writing-mill: Jangobi, forced on both sides. Neither of them wants to mate, but the Kaminoans are forcing the issue with synthetic pheromones. It takes several weeks to get to that point and they are both fighting it with every ounce of willpower they have.

⭐ [Only] Think of Me by @inferior-fairy: Empress Amidala and Emperor Kenobi need Anakin to not go off the rails again, but they need a reason for him to want to stay because they love him too much to force the issue (and make him hate them) with chains or the like. So they give him Babies.

⭐ unfortunately it seems I have written more by @gaily-daily: Look at me. LOOK at me. This is fucked up and ugly and horrible and awful and messy and triggering and so incredibly well written as a dawning horror situation. Dead Dove at its finest. It is incredibly good as a story, but it is also really bad, and you need to go in accepting that. Without details, it's messy/triggering in the GoT sense.

⭐ terribly inconvenient and incredibly terrific by @tennessoui: A classic "Anakin wants to do something he is in no way qualified for and then suffers the consequences for his idiocy" plot, very fun.

I can fill those places in your heart no else can by @pontah: modern au post-breakup revenge sex I guess???

Ba’jurir by @mockingjay34: Rex/Fives, explores the intersection of anti-clone bigotry and anti-omega sexism.

Out in the Corner of the Dark with You by kazmir: a 5+1 fic about Anakin giving Obi-Wan a bunch of soft things as courting gifts

instincts by amidnightlove: just some fun and funky 'cycles make people go a little feral' stuff

EDIT: I missed a bunch so there's a Part Two!

#star wars #phoenix recs #the clone wars #obikin #rexwalker #codywan #obianidala #IDK the fives/rex ship name #codex #quinobi #jangobi #obidala #anidala #omegaverse #shipping #dubcon mention #fuck or die

614 notes · View notes

eleganzadellarosa · 1 year ago

Text

Full Moon (Blood Red sequel)

🩸 pairing: vampire!kyungsoo x fem!reader, Kai x fem!reader, dom!kyungsoo x sub!reader, dom!kai x sub!reader

🩸 genre: smut, angst, touches of fluff here and there

🩸 warnings: EXPLICIT SEXUAL CONTENT MINORS DNI [breeding kink, rough sex, threesome, biting kink, choking, spit kink, spit roasting, squirting, unprotected sex (don’t do it)…honestly just all that nasty freaky shit 😝] blood (again should be obvious), mentions of postpartum depression, death

🩸word count: 13.8K

🩸 A/N: so a few of you wanted a sequel to Blood Red and I loved writing it so I hope this lives up to your expectations 😭 let me know what you think and thanks for reading <3

taglist: @loonloons @doimaru @mrspettysoo @aliencatlady @sleepingbeautydo thank you all so much for the support! <3

part 1 can be found here

“PUUUUUUUUUSH!”

Your heartbeat thumped loudly in your ears, your legs bent and a hand supporting each of your thighs. One belonging to Jongin and the other to Kyungsoo.

This past 9 months has been laborious to say the least. You never expected to get pregnant within your first year of marriage, especially when the child did not belong to the man you married. When you found out, you were excited and happy to be sharing such a deep connection with your husband, however you knew the baby most likely wasn’t his due to your frequent nights spent with his servant.

The child was currently crowning and it took every ounce of strength in you to continue to push.

“You’re doing great Princess, keep pushing!” Vivian called out from below you as she assisted the other midwives.

You were most thankful for her during your pregnancy. She had learned lots of helpful information pertaining to it all from the classes she attended, aiming to become a midwife herself. She was someone you trusted wholeheartedly and couldn't be more grateful for her support.

A few more pushes and the baby was born; a little girl. They laid her on your chest and she instantly stopped crying, but your tears began to fall. It felt weird knowing you were the mother to this child, her safety, security and someone she would grow to look up to. When you looked down to get a better look at her, your heart filled with warmth. She had looks that would be envied by many in her growing years. You hoped it wasn’t so obvious to everyone else, but she shared striking features with her father. Those full lips and big eyes that were undeniably from Kyungsoo.

Of course it was a secret that he was your lover but you knew it would become harder and harder to explain why she looked so much like him. “Maybe because I spend so much time around him” would be an excuse that no one would believe but be the best you could come up with. Now wasn’t the time to burden yourself with the matter, your eyes were heavy and sleep deemed itself more important.

When you woke up, Kyungsoo sat on your left as he flipped the page over in the book he held in his hands. He looked up when you shifted in the bed and immediately put the book down to rush to you.

“Hello my love, how are you feeling? You did so well today.” He rubs your head and kisses your forehead lovingly. He holds your hand in his and rubs it with his thumb.

“Tired, but I want to see her. Her beautiful face is escaping me already.” You sat your body up against the headboard with his help.

“Jongin insisted on staying with her while the midwives made sure everything was just fine. They will bring her back in here shortly, so for now just rest and don’t push yourself too hard.” He paused for a moment before he spoke up again. “She's so beautiful just like you my love. She truly is a bundle of joy.”

He smiled as he spoke about her and it swelled your heart. He often came off as standoffish to everyone else but you knew the real person under the shell. It brought you much sorrow knowing that you would have to raise the child as Jongin's, fearing that anyone would find out the truth.

Jongin has been patient with the affair in itself but you know he wishes things were different. He tries to hide the jealousy that lives inside him like a parasite, a virus that ruins his happiness, but sometimes he can’t help wonder if the aching beats his heart pumps are from wanting you all to himself. Putting a strain on their well established friendship was one thing you hated yourself for but knew there was no turning back the hands of time; not that you would have done anything differently.

"Seems like you have a guest." Kyungsoo says and before you can question him, there's a knock on the door.

Vivian comes into the room with a bright smile on her face as she sees you're now awake. “Hello lovely mama! You did a great job today!” She came over to grab your hand and sit beside you.

Kyungsoo got up and bowed before leaving the room to give you two some privacy.

“You have a beautiful daughter Princess, I know Prince Jongin is ecstatic!”

You weakly smiled at Vivian and nodded. Truthfully and thankfully she didn’t know of your occasional late night erotic adventures and you wanted to keep it that way. If anyone were to chastise you for the deal you made with your husband, you wanted Vivian to have no association.

She holds your left hand in both of hers as tears dropped onto the blanket below. “I was actually quite frightened for you Princess. I wanted no harm to befall you while pregnant. I wish for you to always be blessed with good health…I cannot lose my closest companion.”

The glistening wetness on your cheeks made you realize you were crying with her. It was a fear that frequented your mind yet you put up a good fight to ignore it. An idea that pestered you for your attention like someone waving their hand from far away. She spoke about it as though it would and could never happen, but to you it was speaking it into existence. Just then, the huge double doors to the room opened and in came Jongin with the newborn and one of the midwives. Vivian bows to him and leaves the room with the other woman, waving to you as she closed the door. You straightened your posture and happily open your arms to allow him to place the small child within them.

“She has your beauty my darling, she will always be the perfect princess of our kingdom."

Your eyes filled with more tears. “I'm sorry my first child does not share your blood."

He shushed you and rubbed your cheek. "It’s unfortunate I do not have a child of my own, but I do not hold any resentment to you or how the child came to be. Promise me that one day we will share offspring?" You nodded and he placed a kiss to your scalp. "Is it okay to call the midwife back? She said she will guide you through the breastfeeding."

You nod as you look down at the sleeping child, loving the way she fit so perfectly in your arms. She was on the smaller side but not considered unhealthy. A head full of hair and the softest skin you've ever come in contact with. "Rose" you said out loud but more to yourself, letting your tongue become well acquainted with the name you've just chosen for your very first child.

Later that night while everyone was asleep, you grabbed Rose from her bassinet and wrapped her in a blanket before heading down the long hall towards Kyungsoo's room. You knew he'd get the most time with her when you brought her around while the watchful eyes were covered by their lids. Before you could raise your hand to knock, he softly turned the knob and opened the door. He welcomed you both with a huge smile.

"I could have come to you my love, you need to rest." his brows furrowed with concern as he reached out toward the infant.

"I know, but I felt the need to walk a bit and I wanted to see you."

You weren't sure he heard what you said, his eyes were locked on Rose's face. Everything about him was gentle; his smile, the way he held her, even the usual mysterious aura that he often exuded was gone as if never there. You slowly made your way to sit on his bed, back resting against the few pillows that sat against the headboard.

"She needs much rest I suppose?" He looked up at you while rocking her gently.

You chuckled and nodded. "Yes, Vivian said she will sleep until she gets hungry or needs to be changed. She doesn't have much else to do and sleeping helps her grow."

As if on cue, her face scrunched and her lip quivered letting out a few small whimpers. Kyungsoo's eyes widened and he tried shushing her to no avail. He handed her to you, rubbing her head softly, wanting her to go back to her relaxed state. He watched as you brought her up to your chest to suckle, amazed at how fast she stopped crying. He climbed onto the bed and moved the pillows to sit behind you. He let his arms drape your sides, supporting yours as you held her.

"Would you like to stay with me tonight? I would hate for you to have such a long walk back to your room. "

You thought about it and your body was quite sore so walking right now would be a hassle. One night wouldn't hurt and as you've promised yourself many times before, you'd leave early in the morning before the castle became lively so no one would catch you coming from Kyungsoo's room.

3 months in and you were finding it difficult to cope with the changes that came with being a mother. The lack of sleep, the constant hunger, sore nipples and your decreasing lack of self esteem. You sat in the maid's quarters to spend some time with Vivian and to people watch while everyone partook in their jobs or hobbies. You came to see Vivian and the others often especially since they loved seeing Rose and how much she develops each time. She too loved the bustling atmosphere, never seeming too overwhelmed by the noise or fast pace. Vivian rolled up the sleeves to her dress as she came to sit in front of you, clasping her hands as a signal to hand over the baby.

“Aunt Vivian is finally ready to hold her baby bud.” She excitedly grabbed her and watched her lips spread into a gummy smile.

Once she was in her arms, you realized just how exhausted you felt. Your body no longer felt like your own and the emotional and physical toll finally all came crashing down at once. You suddenly became aware of your slouching posture, pouching stomach and sagging skin. You hated to admit it but you felt ugly, especially when the woman sitting across from you looked like someone painted her with the finest of tools.

Vivian is a beautiful girl and it's a shame no one has come to claim her yet. Fair skin and rosy cheeks, copperish red hair that stayed in a low bun on most days and was let down for special occasions. She was a few inches taller than you and her body was thin. She always smelled like honeysuckle which you thought came from her bubbly and caring personality as no one else smelled like her. She looked so youthful and there was always a light that seemed to follow her. You couldn't take looking at her anymore and asked her to watch Rose for a while so you could get some rest.

You walked back to your room, but instead of stopping at the bed, you dragged yourself to the bathroom where you stood in front of the mirror, looking at the changes to your body that came with being pregnant. The depression was steadily kicking in, your mental health going downhill all in this moment. It sounded like a myth when you would hear women talk about postpartum depression. How could you slip into that mindset when you have a beautiful baby reminding you just how strong and precious you are as a mother? It wasn't about that, you loved your baby but there was an incomprehensible feeling that loomed over you that made you want to curl up and die. There was no cure and you had to let it pass. You wish you could jump in a time machine and skip to the part where you felt better, where you felt like you again.

You retreated to your bed to try and escape your thoughts. Maybe they would go away with some proper sleep and a good meal. However, the more you relaxed, the more your body sunk into a pit of misery, the blanket wrapping you in sadness; and now the tears flowing from your eyes drowning you in sorrow. You needed to be saved from this torture. How long would you have to wait to wake up happy, to not hate the image you saw in your reflection? What happened to the cheery girl that you've always been? It's impossible that one baby changed that and you weren't going to start blaming her now.

It was burdensome wanting to vent your feelings but feeling like no one would understand even though you were surrounded by other mothers. Maybe your feelings were invalid and everyone would think it stupid. Would they tell you it was too early to feel like this and that it only got worse the more children you had? Now did you even want more children? Did you even want Rose? No, don't think like that. Even if she was conceived out of wedlock, you had no right to not want her anymore. It was all a ruse that your heart, mind and body evoked to shift your personality and make your life a living hell. "You can get through this" you told yourself and let your eyes drift you off to sleep.

It's already been 10 months since you gave birth and you were finally at the stage where you can say your bouts of depression have passed. Sadly, you were dealing with a new problem; the distance between the two friends was getting undeniably larger. You constantly found yourself breaking up the silent arguments they were having, almost always over trivial things or you. "She's not even your wife!" Jongin said once and Kyungsoo's hand balled into a fist but he turned and walked away before he did something he would regret. You knew it would only get worse if you didn't take matters into your own hands, so tonight you were going to sleep in Vivian's room and let them hopefully solve their issues on their own time.

"Where are you going my love?" Jongin asks, his face dropping slowly as his realizes you're taking your things with you.

"Jongin I can't handle seeing your friendship with Kyungsoo crumble into pieces. I would prefer not having to be the mediator every time there is a quarrel."

He can't find the words and stutters as he reached for your receding form as it left out the bedroom door. On your way to the other side, Kyungsoo sees you in the hallway and his face lights up.

"My beautiful baby Rose and my sweet love" He then sees that you have more than you needed for a walk through the castle and you were going the wrong way to get back to your room. "Is everything okay my love? Would you like to stay with me tonight?"

You appreciated that he didn't automatically assume that Jongin did something wrong, but he himself wasn't in the clear either. "I would not Kyungsoo. As I told Jongin, I shall no longer be getting myself in between your frequent disagreements."

Disappointment evident on his face, he came to give you a kiss on the forehead and a kiss on the cheek to his daughter. "I understand. My apologies for putting a burden on you often or even at all."

The apology was sincere but it wasn't enough for you to want to end your discipline early. Vivian’s room was comfortable, always just the right temperature so staying with her was never an issue. She loved your company and didn’t get much time with you as she was always so busy with her studies.

You laid on top of her fluffy and soft sheets, cradling Rose against your chest, feeling her light breaths. You pouted and sighed anticipating the end to all of this, you just wanted everything to go back normal. This is not what you expected to be going through right after your emotional slump. You wanted the attention back; the long hours spent talking about any and everything, looking into each other’s eyes, finding security in each other’s embrace. You wanted Kyungsoo. The thought of him is what coast you to sleep and what fueled your dreams that night.

It felt like years went by since you’ve last been in your own or Kyungsoo’s room, but it had only been 3 weeks. “I needed some time to myself” is what you told Vivian, which was part of the truth and the perfect reason in her mind to why you stayed with her for so long, even though it wouldn’t have taken much to convince her. You sat in the garden to watch Rose crawl around and explore the many things she couldn’t when she was strictly confined to your arms. You were so deep in focus that you didn’t hear Kyungsoo greet you when he walked over.

“I’ve missed you, you’re starting to feel like a figment of my imagination.”

“Kyungsoo…if only I could tell you how much I miss you.”

He smiled shyly and grabbed your hand to place a kiss on the back. “You can tell me my love, how much have you missed me?” He cocked his head and stared at you waiting for you to reply and you felt your heart do flips.

Gosh was he a beautiful man; those beautiful big eyes and plump soft lips. Those lips you wanted to kiss and have kissed on many occasions. You were falling in love all over again. Who wouldn’t when he was the sweetest and most caring man? He chuckled seeing you so lost in his beauty and he leaned over to kiss your forehead, snapping you out of your thoughts.

“Perhaps I know now just by how you’re looking at me even though I would have loved to hear you say it.”

A blush rose on your cheeks and your ears turned red with warmth. He roped you in so easily every time, you were weak to him, but you knew you had to stay strong against his attacks if you wanted your plan to work. “I would if you and Jongin didn’t make me so angry.”

He smiled sheepishly forgetting you were still upset with them and hoping you forgot as well. He went over to Rose and picked her up so she could touch the flowers higher up on the bushes. She loved him and he treated her like the delicate flower she was. She would always get so fixated with his face and played with it a lot, almost like she could tell she was practically looking in a mirror. The more she grew, the more their matching features became. Thankfully no one mentioned it as you thought previously and God knows you wanted it to stay that way.

“Is it alright if she stays with me for a few hours? I’ll bring her back to Vivian’s room before dinner.” You nodded and he walked over placing a hand on your waist. He bent to brush his lips over yours. “I’m sorry we’ve caused you so much stress my darling, we’ve been immature but I hope you’ll forgive us soon.” And with that, he was on his way with Rose back inside to spend some quality time.

You wondered what Jongin was up to at this time since it was already getting late. Not having been back in your room for so long, it almost felt foreign like you’d only seen it in a dream. He almost crashed into you when you walked in, he seemed to be leaving out at the same time. His eyes lit up seeing you standing in the doorway.

“Are you staying with me tonight?” His voice almost raising an octave from the excitement, forgetting why he wanted to leave in the first place.

“Hmm, it depends on you my prince.”

It was taunting, almost seductive of an answer and you knew he took it as a challenge. His hand around your waist stopped you from brushing past him to get to the bathroom.

“And what can I do to make you stay?”

There were multiple answers you could give him and ones you leaned more toward like making sure you only had the strength in your legs to sleep next to him. Yet you weren’t going to tell him that and sound so needy, so alternatively you kissed him on the cheek and wriggled from his grasp to continue your journey to the restroom. You could almost hear his wheels turning on the opposite side of the door although he kept quiet.

You walked out of the bathroom to see him sitting on the bed. It was apparent in his posture that he had a goal in mind, one fueled by nothing but desire. In all honesty, you wanted him just as much but you didn't want to seem desperate or like you were going to give in from disciplining him so quickly. When you walked over to him, he got off the bed and stood in front of you, making it press into the middle of your back.

“You know I love you right?” He says, punctuating his sentence with a kiss.

You nod your head and wrap your arms around his neck. “I do know and I know it’s as much as I love you.”

It was a lie. Not about you loving him but the amount in which he loved you could break a scale. He leaned in with each of his hands resting on your sides as he kissed you. The longer it went on, it quickly turned from innocent to sinful. His hands slid up your nightgown and yanked your panties down. With ease, he sat you on the high bed and spread your legs out without breaking the kiss.

He used his fingers to play with your increasingly throbbing pussy. Your arousal made it easy for him to slip two fingers in. They curled upwards and he moved them in a “come hither” motion, still not breaking the kiss. It was turning you on more and you couldn't help but moan into his mouth.

“How badly do you want me? Tell me.” He finally removed his lips from yours and stared at you deeply with his fingers picking up speed. He knew just how much you craved the physical contact and he knew just what to do to satiate your hunger.

It was becoming hard to concentrate but you wanted him to know just how good he was making you feel. “So badly, I want to feel you inside. I miss having you there.” You licked and bit at his lip, earning a small groan from him.

He pushed you back and further up on the bed and came to hover over you. He removed both of your clothing so that you lay naked with each other. He guided his length into you and stuck his fingers with your juices into your mouth.

“Suck as if that was me in your mouth. Don’t stop until I tell you to.”

You had no room to disobey and his building thrusts made you comply. Jongin had his days where he was just as dominant as Kyungsoo, a side of him that wasn't discovered until after you got married, and yet they still could not be compared. There was something about Kyungsoo that made you always want to fall to your knees and have him look down on you, make you feel like the only option you had was to submit.

Jongin sped up his thrusts and got deeper each time. He took his fingers out your mouth and bent your legs to your chest as he held them down at the back of your knees. The new angle brought you more pleasure and your mouth hung open as you moaned loudly. The bed was beginning to rock with his thrusts but he seemed to pay no mind to the creaking.

He pulled out and sat on the bed and pulled you into his lap, his back facing the door. You circled your hips as he rolled his upwards, making him hit that spongy spot inside you. He kissed you sloppily, trailing it from your jaw then to your neck. Your head popped up when you heard the door to your bedroom creak open. You tried to stop moving on him, but he held you in place.

“Jongin wait, it’s Kyungsoo.”

His grip on you tightened. “I know who it is, keep riding.”

You were confused but your hips never halted. Kyungsoo’s eyes bore holes in you as he watched you move up and down on his friend's dick and when your brows furrowed as you moaned, you can see him swallow thickly. He slowly removed his clothes and walked closer towards the bed. Your body warmed and your cheeks flushed when he reached his destination. Not once have you ever had both men in the room with you during such an intimate moment and truthfully it was awakening a side to you that you didn’t know existed.

Jongin broke the silence and spoke from below you. “We wanted to make it up to you, as long as you’re comfortable with it.”

If it wasn’t for Kyungsoo standing at the edge of your bed with nothing covering his body, you would have questioned Jongin. But it was obvious, tonight they were giving you an apology in the most pleasurable form and you weren’t going to deny it. You reached out toward the standing man and Jongin flipped so your back now faced Kyungsoo.

He climbed onto the bed and Jongin laid back with his dick still inside you. His hands rested on your hips and he began thrusting up into you again. Kyungsoo was at your back and his lips came down to connect to your neck. He licked, sucked and bit at the skin and his hands came up to massage and pinch your nipples.

“Feels good doesn’t it?” He bit your earlobe and licked at the shell of it.

“Oh god yes…don't stop” your head fell back onto his shoulder.

Jongin dug his nails into your hips and thrust into you at a vicious pace. With his thrusts and Kyungsoo’s abuse on your neck and nipples, the sensations had your body on fire. You were almost screaming with how loud your moans were, music to both of their ears.

“I-I’m g-gonna cum!” The knot in your stomach begged to snap and your toes started to curl.

Kyungsoo tilted your head back with his hand under your chin. “Open” he says and when you do, he trails some of his saliva in your mouth then brings you into a deep kiss. His hand wrapped around your neck and he squeezed the sides just enough to make your head feel fuzzy.

Under you, Jongin roughly circles the pad of his thumb over your clit and eases you into your orgasm. Your walls clenched around him and he quickly lifted you off of him, his dick spasming against your stomach as he came in spurts. Your chest heaved as you came down from your high and you opened your eyes. Kyungsoo stared back at you calling you “good girl” and planting another kiss on your lips.

“We’re not done yet my love” He slightly whispered in your ear, turning you over in the process. “Suck.” He tapped his dick against your lips and you immediately obliged.

You diligently sucked and stroked him while he bent over to finger you. The mix was lewd and you loved every second of it. His other hand held your head in place so he could thrust up into your mouth. When he felt a tear drop onto his skin, he pulled your head off of him.

“My good girl, lay back for me.” He kissed his way from your lips down to your pelvic bone, sucking and biting. He opened your legs and lazily kissed and licked up your inner thighs. He spread your lips with his two fingers and spit on your pussy before going to suck on your clit. “You always taste so fucking good."

Jongin tapped on your cheek from behind you, making you turn your attention to him. “You didn’t forget about me did you darling?”

He stroked his length and you watched him upside down. He slipped his dick past your lips and you happily sucked. You felt the air leave your lungs slowly the more the night went on. They were wasting no time in making you lose your mind over their actions. Kyungsoo stopped eating you out and stood on his knees. He rubbed the head of his dick harshly against your clit, making you squeeze around nothing. He pushed all the way in one go and cursed when his tip kissed your cervix.

“F-fuck you feel so good.” Was all he said before pulling almost all the way out then snapping his hips forward, his speed just as fast or maybe a tad faster than Jongin.

Your strangled moans sent vibrations through Jongin’s dick shoved down your throat, his moans sounding slightly high pitched the more he tried to hold them back. His hands played with your nipples, increasing your sensitivity. Kyungsoo’s nails dug into your sides and he bit at your ribcage. You felt like you were going to die from the overstimulation, it was absolutely blissful. Jongin eased his way out of your mouth to let you breathe and regain the oxygen you lost.

After a few moments he thrust back in and bent down to suck and play with your nipples. “How does it feel to get fucked like this? How long have you wanted this?” He asked knowing you couldn’t answer with your throat obstructed, but your muffled moans and shaking legs gave him his reply.

“You’re so beautiful like this, dick pleasuring you from both ends. Such a good girl, just listen how wet you are.”

Kyungsoo was right, the sounds that came from your pussy were downright obscene. Your orgasm was approaching for the second time tonight, yet this one proved a lot more intense than the last.

“She’s close.” Kyungsoo says, obviously speaking to your husband as if he couldn’t already tell.

Jongin sped up, your throat now sore from the constant friction but adding to the overall satisfaction. Kyungsoo pulled out causing you to whimper at the loss of contact but Jongin sits you up and then down on his dick. He wraps his arms under your knees and connects them behind your head. The new position gave Kyungsoo the perfect angle to roughly rub your clit as Jongin thrusts ruthlessly into you.

Kyungsoo bites his lip while he quickly strokes his length, watching your face contort from the constant pleasure, chasing his own orgasm. Your toes were curling and Jongin’s thrusts were getting sloppy. Jongin kissed at your shoulder and Kyungsoo kissed the calf on one of your legs. The familiar feeling of fangs bared down into the skin and with a few more swift rubs on your clit, you squirted harshly all over Kyungsoo as your orgasm washed over. The man behind you choked out an “oh fuck” as he came inside you, the warmth from it making you clench even harder. Seconds later, cum from the man in front of you sprayed over your chest and stomach.

As you lay down, not even worrying about the sticky and wet mess over your bodies, Kyungsoo cleans himself off and makes his way to the door.

“Kyungsoo” you call out to him meekly, head lying on the chest of a sleeping Jongin. “Won’t you stay?”

“I will not, I have fulfilled my purpose of pleasuring you and you seem to accept our apology. That is all my heart could desire so I shall not be extending my stay.”

You were greedy and getting too in your head. This wasn’t something they technically wanted but knew you’d enjoy and used it as a way to earn back your trust and your presence back in their beds. The guilt reappeared, and seeing Kyungsoo leave the room made you realize how unhinged the love triangle was.

You were much too fucked out now to run after him, so you instead snuggled under Jongin’s arm and let your eyes close.

The next morning you threw on a robe over last night's attire and headed downstairs to the kitchen for a glass of water. Kyungsoo stood next to the chef as he sampled what was for today’s breakfast.

“Good morning to you both.”

They both turned around and bowed to you, Kyungsoo not bothering to do so fully as he always does. You disregarded it as him being busy and focused. One of the maids poured your water and you thanked her before leaving, taking note that Kyungsoo still didn’t give your existence the time of day.

He ignored you not just in the morning, but in the afternoon and well into the night, even bleeding into the next morning. Now it was becoming concerning, this was so out of character and atypical for him. It came to be that you were running out of ideas to grab his attention but he just wouldn’t budge. Everyone was starting to notice and mention his bad attitude too. “He seems so agitated, the slightest thing might peeve him off” you heard someone say in passing.

You couldn’t help but wonder if you did something wrong, he did only begin to act like this after last night. Even if it was your fault, you’d prefer to hear him say it rather than not have him speak to you at all. It was late now and everyone retreated to their rooms to go to sleep, but apparently Kyungsoo had other ideas when he stopped you right before you reached yours.

“Would you like to come outside and see the stars with me?”

You couldn’t understand why he offered after ignoring you for so long, but alas you were itching to get to the bottom of this even if it meant interrupting your sleep. The night air was cool, breezes skating through the sky every so often. He guided you through the garden that he knew all too well and sat you down in a spot where you had the perfect view of the stars above.

He watched you watch the stars and his heart warmed seeing you smile. “I…I’m sorry.” He continued when you turned to look at him, confusion clearly written over your face. “I’m sorry I have not been treating you well. I’m just…after last night I don’t have the gall to act as if I’m content with sharing you. Yet I know that wanting you for myself is preposterous since you were not mine to begin with.”

You couldn’t agree but you also couldn’t disagree. Your mind was set on Jongin the first day you saw him and you made an oath to yourself to marry him. It was the tug on your heart strings from Kyungsoo that had you wanting more than your original desires, but it was nothing short of fate meeting him in the way you did. You loved them both equally, but knowing that everything made him feel so torn stabbed you right through the heart. The agreement to share you with your husband came easier in its early days.

It made you feel sorrow for Jongin too. He worked so hard to express his feelings for you and wait to marry you, but all of this would have him believe that your love was easily swayed. There was no answer that would make this better for either party and now that you have a child with one, the connection between you grew more complicated by the day.

“What can I do to ease your sadness?” You asked as you place your hand over his.

His head dropped and he let out a sigh. “Nothing. Nothing will make me feel as though I’m not messing things up for you and your future. I deem it my fault that you fell for me in the first place and that, I do regret. It’s on me that you don’t fully express your love for Jongin. As a vampire, love is not something we take lightly. I want a soulmate that can be my source of happiness for as long as I live and that is quite literally forever.”

You reached for words that moved further away from you the closer they got to the tip of your tongue. You didn’t want to lose him and you know he wished for the same. The guilt was getting the best of him and there was nothing to do to make it better. This was your true punishment, living out your dream that slowly became a nightmare.

“I want you to forget me. Act as if you have never known of my existence and I will only live as your servant. I do not wish to continue my life in such grief and want what is best for you.”

“You’re what’s best for me Kyungsoo” is what you wanted to say but the words did opposite of what the falling tears did. “Please!” was all you managed to say as your hand slipped off of his when he stood up to walk away.

The weeks that went by were treacherous. You gave up on trying to communicate with him in any way you could think of. From touches, to glances and the most obvious, just talking to him. Nothing seemed to work and you undoubtedly believed he didn't love you anymore. But how could he let you go so easily when he tried so hard to have you? You weren't going to settle for the thoughts that convinced you of the negative, you had to ask him one last time if you truly meant anything to him.

Today was Rose's birthday and the castle was filled with crowds upon crowds of people ready to celebrate the one year anniversary of her birth. They all greeted you with kisses to your cheek or a hug, congratulating you and Jongin on your little one. It was no longer awkward to act as if she belonged to him, but the smile you put on wasn't genuine. You kept sneaking peeks over at Kyungsoo every chance you could get, losing the confidence to approach him. He seemed so much more scary in this instance, looking like he would bite off the head of anyone who dared to talk to him.

He stood at the other end of the room, not taking a single glance your way. It hurt being ignored like this. You know he did it for his own sanity but why was it slowly driving you insane? Has he really fallen out of love with you? What would it take for him to at least talk to you the way he used to? You felt invisible in his presence and all you wanted was for him to give you just a pinch of attention. You excused yourself while everyone took turns wishing blessings for a long and happy life for Rose.

You pushed through the crowd and went to go toward her room to grab some lighter clothing since she seemed to be burning up in the ones she wore, growing more agitated by the second. Kyungsoo happens to be walking up the stairs already, giving you the perfect opportunity to question him.

"Kyungsoo..."

He turned around and without looking at you, he bowed respectfully and turned on his heels to continue up the stairs, but you rushed and grabbed his arm. He startles and turns around.

"Kyungsoo, please just look at me. Please don't ignore me, I'm starting to break."

He turns to stare, looking at you as if he's disgusted or annoyed with your determination to get him to speak to you. What has he become? What have you done to him?

"Does me looking at you make you feel better? If it does, am I left to deal with my sadness alone?"

"Kyungsoo, I didn't mean-"

"You didn't mean what? To make me look at you so I can fall in love with you all over again just so I once again don't get to have you to myself?"

You go to speak up but hear the abundance of approaching voices, so you quickly drag him up the remainder of the stairs against his will. You take him to the opposite side of the castle where you know it's usually quiet and barren.

"I'm sorry for everything that caused this. I never meant for any of this to happen but I love you Kyungsoo and you ignoring me is tearing me apart." You poured your heart out to him when you came to a halt, somewhere in the middle of the empty hallway. "It pains me even more knowing you no longer love me. How am I supposed to live this way if you don't love me?"

"Who…who said I didn't love you?" He paced around in a small section of the hallway and pinched the bridge of his nose. You can tell he was upset, not at you but at what you were saying because he didn't know how to express how he was feeling. "I've never stopped loving you and that's the problem. You want me to look at you darling? Well I want you in my arms every night but I can't have that! I can't even claim my daughter as my own!"

He stopped his pacing and walked over to you and held your face in his hands, desperation all over his face. "You are my always and forever and I can't let anyone know that. I must love in secret in fear of being exiled or killed. Why would I want that for us?"

You were being selfish again. Only thinking about yourself and how easily things can come to you because of who you are and who you're married to. He doesn't have that privilege and never will, things just don't work that way and never has. Why did he have to fall in love with you out of all people? It would have been so much easier if the love was one sided.

"Kyungsoo, I-I..."

He let his lids close gently and he let out a sigh before he closed the space between you. He kissed you like he needed you, wanted you, craved you. Like he hadn't seen you in years and he's finally able to show you just how much he longed for you. You were quickly melting into the kiss, hands travelling up to his neck as his fell to the small of your back. You thanked God for the seclusion, it would be terrible if anyone caught you two now.

He pulled you in closer to him, and your hands caressed his chest. You worked quickly to unbutton his blouse and slide it off his shoulders. His kisses moved down to your neck and he backed you against the wall. Your hands slid down and went to unbuckle his pants. Although no one was around, your mental clock started ticking, only a matter of time before everyone wondered where you had gone. He easily picked you up by the thighs and you held onto his shoulders for support. Your dress settled on your legs and he moved in between them.

He was able to thrust in no problem with the amount of slick that accumulated just from the kiss. It felt so good having him inside of you again, it's been weeks since your last encounter. His thrusts were slow but deep. He was making love to you and didn't care that it had to be up against the wall. He knew what he was doing right now would only make him want you more but ignoring you was becoming insufferable. To feel your legs wrapped around his torso, your skin against his lips, your walls clenching around his dick. It was perfect. Your moans were the tune that charmed the snake, the siren serenading her prey, he was hypnotized.

"Cum for me my love, I can feel you getting closer." If he was going to enjoy this moment, he was going to enjoy it to the fullest. His tongue glided across the side of your neck and his fangs sunk into the skin. The sweet taste of your blood filled his mouth and he moaned as he felt you tighten around him.

There was something about the danger of it all. He could easily drink to his heart's content and leave you with nothing but an empty vessel but he never did and always stopped when your head was on the verge of getting light. He knew just what to do to keep you wanting more and what would be enough to satisfy him. To orgasm like this made up for all the time you missed with him. You weren't going to be the only one to finish, so you dropped to your knees and wrapped your lips around his throbbing length.

"Cum in my mouth Kyungsoo, don't let me forget your taste."

You slid the underside of the head over your tongue as you looked up at him with doe eyes. His hand tangled in your hair and he released in your mouth with a choked moan. He helped you stand and stuffed his dick back in his pants. He placed a kiss on your forehead and rubbed your back, catching his breath along with you.

“Always remember I love you no matter what, but I can’t live the rest of my life knowing you can’t be mine. I want you for as long as we live and you know just how long that is for me.” Your head rested in his hands now and he looked in your eyes lovingly. “When that day comes my love, I will be here ready for you.”

His lips brushed against yours and he smiled when he pulled back. He bowed and walked back down the hallway, leaving you there to collect your thoughts. To others it would seem like not much changed, but to you it felt like you finally had the last piece to your puzzle. He made your days feel complete and with the distance between you this past few weeks, it felt like your days were starting to mix together. One thing was for certain, you were determined to keep the flames of your love ablaze.

A few nights later, you jolted awake some time after midnight. In contrast to when Rose was a baby, you were actually able to sleep through most of the night without her waking up crying. Something felt off though, and you were only going to feel comfortable going back to sleep if you found the reason you were awake. It made your heart race and your anxiety tickle your senses. You looked over at Jongin who slept peacefully next to you.

Throwing the blanket off your legs, you eased your way off the bed and went over to Rose’s crib. Within the dim candlelight you could see the beads of sweat rolling off of her forehead and chest. It was quite cool in the room so sweating was the last thing you expected to see her doing. You carefully placed the back of your hand against her forehead and immediately felt the burning heat emanating from her.

You guess this is what they call “mother’s instinct”, a force and sense of urgency that only a mother would know which brought you from the deepest depths of your sleep. You picked her up and ran her to the bathroom where you quickly ran a tub with cool water, not knowing what else would work. You removed both of your clothing and sat with her, hoping it did something, anything. A new fear emerged, your mind always thinking of the worst outcome before the best. Rose had always been healthy, only catching a cold once or twice, so seeing her here with brows tightly knit together and her mouth agape as she wailed, you knew something was up. You thought nothing of her behavior at the party and now you beat yourself up for not taking note.

“Oh my poor baby…” you let the tears you didn’t know were building, fall down your cheeks and to your chin.

Your mind searched for anything that could help her right now and it stopped on Vivian informing you on the benefits of breast milk. Thankfully Rose didn't push you away, but her fever just would not budge. Eventually it was enough to relax her to sleep and you too dozed off, still sitting with your bare skin against the cold porcelain.

The sound of the door is what woke you up and made you realize you were still where you last remember. Jongin's smile dropped as his eyes adjusted to the sight in front of him.

“What’s wrong? Why are you in here with her?”

You were crying again, Rose still just as hot as she was last night lying on your chest breathing heavily. Jongin helped you rush her to the servant’s quarters where you’d hopefully find Vivian or anyone else who knew of something to treat her with. By this time you were hysterical, clutching onto Jongin’s arm as he laid her down to be examined. Thankfully word spread quickly and Vivian rushed in to check on you and the toddler.

“Something’s wrong Vivian! I don’t want to lose my baby!” Your nose was red, tears old and new streamed down your face and you were starting to hiccup out your words.

“I’m sure she’s okay Princess, we’ve called the doctor and he’ll be here soon. Everything will be okay.” She grabbed your hands within her own and pleaded with her eyes for you to believe what she said, although tears brimmed them.

10 minutes later and two servants came with the doctor, leading him in the right direction. He bowed when his eyes landed on you.

“Princess do not worry, the examination will be quick and thorough and I’m sure we’ll have something to cure her. Please go have a cold drink for yourself to help relax.”

You nodded through sniffles and left out the wooden double doors with Vivian. Kyungsoo rushes down the hallway, stopping you and Vivian in your tracks, looking very concerned when he sees the state you’re in. He bowed and Vivian excused herself to go back in the room with the doctor. He stepped in front of you and wiped your tears with his thumbs.

“What’s happening my love? Please tell me.”

“She’s sick Kyungsoo, s-she had a fever all night and I tried sitting in cool water with her b-but it didn’t work and she still has a fever and I’m so scared Kyungsoo!” The words poured out of your mouth faster than you planned and your nonstop tears fell with them.

“Shh shh, she'll be alright, I know she will.” He pulled you into a hug and rubbed your back. He had tears of his own to hold back from seeing you cry and knowing of how dangerous fevers were for his young daughter.

The doctor had long gone and he gave you medicine to give Rose throughout the day. She was fast asleep now but you were scared to take your eyes off of her. Jongin was just as scared as you were and sat and watched her with you. He cared for her deeply as if she was his own and losing her would turn him into a mess.

"My love, you need to eat something. You've been watching her all day but what about you? It's alright, I can watch her so you can relax for a while." He tilted his head with his arm wrapped around your shoulder.

"I can't leave her, I won't be okay if I do so..." You brushed the few strands that stuck to her forehead and gave her a small kiss. You physically felt like you couldn't move from that spot and if your eyes ventured off of her, you'd miss a crucial part of whatever was going to happen.

He nodded understandingly. "As you wish. I'll go and get you something." He stood and pressed a kiss to your scalp before leaving.

She opened her eyes soon after and stared up at you expressionless. A soft knock on the door broke you out of staring back at her. Kyungsoo enters cautiously and you gesture for him to come over. He held her within his arms and she played with his fingers.

"Has she been recovering?" He questioned and grabbed your hand.

"Not yet unfortunately. The doctor gave me some herbs to give her thrice a day but so far the fever is still quite high."

He looked back down at Rose then back at you. "I think I might know something that can help, do you mind if I try it?"

"Kyungsoo she is your child also, you don't need my permission to help her."

"But I also wouldn't go against your wishes if you said no. It is not my child alone and most importantly you are the mother so I respect however you may feel."

You smiled shyly and he raised your pointer finger to his mouth. You watched as he used his canine to puncture the skin. You mentally winced from the small pain but the feeling was all too familiar by now. The small drop of blood that leaked from the wound, he brought to her mouth and let it drip inside. Her tongue moved around the inside as if she tried to not waste any although it was a singular drop. Her breathing quickened and she panted heavily. She scrunched her nose and squeezed her eyes shut. You watched in awe as two white fangs grew out her mouth and rested on the top of her bottom lip. She opened her eyes and just like you thought, two piercing red ones like the kind you've seen from Kyungsoo stared back at you.

"Kyungsoo look!" You shouted in amazement and he chuckled and nodded his head. You never thought about how different it would be caring for a hybrid child like this but you were thankful Kyungsoo was there to help you along the way.

She sat up in his arms and reached out to touch your face, bewildered by the sudden changes. When her skin touched yours, you realized just how much cooler she felt.

"It worked...Kyungsoo, my God it worked!" You bawled, thankful that you had your healthy baby back. "How'd you know it would help?"

"I wasn't entirely sure but I knew how much faster we heal, she just needed something to awaken that side of her."

Jongin came back in with one of your favorite meals and sat it down next to the bed. You immediately told him of the good news and that Kyungsoo was the reason behind it all. To your surprise, he hugged him tightly and tears dropped onto his shirt.

"I can't thank you enough Kyungsoo, I am forever indebted to you."

"Please, I am only doing what's right. You being my close friend is enough for me." Jongin looked at him and he patted the crying man on the back.

Rose was cured, but it was only the beginning for the sickness that plagued the castle.

Servant after servant, maid after maid, guard after guard, everyone seemed to catch the disease as it quickly spread within the castle walls. It picked and chose for who it became terminal and soon it seemed like a funeral every week. Jongin as king of this castle had lots of hard decisions to make on how to save his people. He worked all day and night, sometimes never leaving his study or finding the time to sleep. He was overworked but he couldn't bring himself to stop when people were starting to drop like flies from this random illness. Apparently it was widespread and people outside the kingdom walls fell prey to it as well. How it ventured into your circle was still a mystery but that was the least of concerns.

You had the available, uncompromised maids make Jongin some tea that would help him relax. You walked to his study with a cup in hand and knocked on the door.

"Come in." He said muffled on the other side.

"Jongin, I've brought you some tea. You've been in here for 3 days now my love."

"Thank you my dear wife. I'm sorry I haven't been spending time with you and Rose, it's all so much and I need to do what I can to help"

You walked over to him and he welcomed you in his lap. You rubbed his head and he rested it against your chest. His arms wrapped around your waist and he hugged you tightly.

"I miss lying next to you darling, this desk is so hard and cold." He looked up at you with puppy eyes.

You turned slightly in his lap and grabbed his face in your hands, bringing your lips down to his. His body relaxed immediately and he reciprocated the kiss. His hand slid up your leg and under your dress and he playfully rubbed circles high on your inner thigh. Before he could deepen the kiss, he turned away and broke into a violent coughing fit. You patted his back to offer some assistance, but it didn't seem to help.

"My prince, is everything okay? I'm afraid you're overworking yourself, perhaps you should take a break for today."

“I'm fine, just a cough and you know, that sounds wonderful.” He looked up at you lovingly and smiled. “Let’s go, I will come back for this later."

His eyes didn’t hesitate to close once his head hit the pillow. The fatigue was evident in the bags under his eyes and the limpness of his body. Everyone would agree that everything was scary and happening too quickly. It was as they say, “tell them you love them before it’s too late”, and right now was too late. You thanked the heavens that Rose didn’t die from it but not everyone was so lucky.

You decided to give Jongin some time alone and walked down to Kyungsoo’s room. The castle was bare, you didn’t really have to worry about anyone seeing you. When you reached his room, you knocked three times before he opened it. He looked just as tired as Jongin, his eyes looked at you but more so off into the distance.

“Kyungsoo?” You waved a hand in front of his face to barely see a change in focus through his pupils.

“I can hear them; everyone. All the screams of pain and agony, I hear everything.”

You pushed further into the room and brought him in your arms. “Kyungsoo it’s okay, I’m here…”

His larger frame relaxed as you held him at the foot of his bed. Of course there would be downsides to having such great senses but an experience that you didn’t share was hard to put into perspective; you could only guess what that must feel like. Now you wondered if it was taking a toll on Rose as well. Your heart twinged for them; sympathy being the only thing to offer. You put your hands over his ears and he looked up at you, silently thanking you although you know that barely did a thing.

He grabbed both your hands and placed kisses over all yours fingers. “My sweet girl, you’re so good to me.” He moved his lips down to your wrist kissing each two times, alternating between them. “Why are you so perfect? I'm so scared to lose you.”

He cupped your cheek in his hand, using the other to gently brush your hair behind your ear. He looked at you like you would disappear if he stopped and the idea of that frightened him, seeing as he's helped carry more coffins than he could count. You sat up on your knees and he pulled you into his lap. He caressed your back or massaged your hips, whichever satisfied him the most in that moment. He pulled you in by the nape of your neck to kiss him deeply, to close off his hearing and make him forget. You cupped his head in your hands once again, not skipping to cover his ears.

Everything you did made him fall into deeper depths of love with you. Why did you care for him so much and why was there no one else like you for him? You had to be his forever, he wouldn’t be able to take it if you weren't and would find any way to end his misery. He loved you and promised to make every second with you precious. He got so caught up in your presence and actions that he really stopped hearing everything around him happen. He was turning into putty under your gaze, lips puffy from the kiss. He was done with your lips now, moving down to kiss everything he could reach.

He punctuated each of his kisses to your body with an “I love you”. He slowly stripped you until there was nothing left to remove. You mirrored his actions and rid him of all his clothing. You sat back in his lap and ground your hips against his slowly. He hadn’t taken his eyes off you since the kiss started and he watched your reaction as he teased parts of your body. He rolled your nipple between his fingers, earning a small whimper from you. He held your hips in place and stood up to throw you onto the bed, before climbing in himself. His kisses started at your ankles, taking his time showing his appreciation.

Up your calves, to your thighs and eventually ghosting over your pussy. He teased you, his lips never stopping where you wanted them, but you were patient with letting him go at his own pace; whatever helped shut out the world around him. Finally he spread your lips and dived in, keeping eye contact. He flattened his tongue and danced it over your clit, sucking and biting. That tightness in your stomach you knew all too well started to build in the pit. Your head fell back as your hands threaded through his hair. He added two fingers to the mix, thrusting them in and out at a quick pace, your walls clenching around them.

"K-kyungsoo, fuck, please I'm gonna cum!"

Right before you came, he removed his fingers and stopped sucking on your clit to come up and capture you in a hungry kiss. "Don't cum yet, cum with me okay?"

You nodded and he aligned the head of his dick with your entrance and pushed in slowly. You watched with him as he slid in and moaned when he bottomed out. His thrusts were slow and deep, hitting that gummy spot in you.

"Look at me.." He tilted your chin with his finger. "You love me?"

"Yes...of course." Your mind was fuzzy, the deep strokes driving you crazy.

"Use your words, let me hear you say it." He was just as breathless as you but his pace never slowed.

"I love you Kyungsoo, so much. I'll love you forever and always."

He caught his bottom lip between his teeth and sped up his thrusts. If you were close to your orgasm before, you were even closer now. You wanted to wait for him but that was easier said than done. His hand was around your throat now, squeezing tightly. He bent down to kiss you once again and dragged his teeth over your bottom lip. You were clenching hard around him now, waiting for him to give you the okay.

"You want to cum? Cum with me my love."

His thumb rubbing over your clit is what pushed you over the edge, legs shaking and closing around his waist. A few more sloppy thrusts and he pulled out and came on your stomach. He dropped down next to you and pulled you into his embrace. He kissed you on the bridge of your nose and moved the hair out of your face. You laid there with him in silence, eyes threatening to close, but then you remembered Jongin.

"Kyungsoo, I have to go check on Jongin, he didn't look too good earlier."

He sat up on his elbow, clearly looking distressed by your statement. "I told him to take some time to himself, but he's quite stubborn. I'll come with you, maybe I can convince him to let someone else take over for a few days."

You smiled at him and cleaned off before retrieving your clothes that sprawled on the floor. Vivian still had Rose with her so you knew not to worry while she was in such good hands. The journey back to your room felt cold, those same gut wrenching instincts kicking in the closer you got. Unfortunately for you, the feeling wasn't wrong and when you opened the door, you see Jongin slumped over in the bed coughing up blood into his hand.

"NO, Jongin!" You quickly rushed over to his aid, extending your handkerchief. There was already so much blood that it barely cleaned what was left over on his lips. He looked so lifeless with how pale his skin became. "What's happening? Jongin please!"

"No please, go away, I don't want you seeing me like this." He spoke through labored breaths, weakly pushing at your arm to drive you away. "Kyungsoo, take her!"

For a moment you forgot he even followed you in here. He stood in place with wide eyes.

"Kyungsoo please help him! Is there nothing you can do? Can't you help him like you helped Rose?" You begged and pleaded with him, yet he stood stationary.

"I...no, there's only one thing I can do to help but it would take such a toll on him and it would be a burden for you to witness. There's also no guarantee it will work..." He trailed off as he finished his sentence as if it just clicked in his mind what he ultimately would have to do.

"Please Kyungsoo! I'll have to take those chances, just don't let him die!"

You were reliving your fears. Time slowed down and sped up all at the same time, dizzying your brain, shaking your vision. You couldn't lose him. Kyungsoo was important but Jongin was your first love. The man who stuck true to his word from day one and never let his kind heart change. It was now that you regret not spending more time with him if these were his last moments with you. You regret feeling like you weren't giving him your all even though you cared for him down to your soul. But most of all you regret being the cause of all the sadness and sorrow he tried to hide. You needed another chance, a chance to make things as right as they could be.

Kyungsoo looked at Jongin's frail and pale form, brows furrowed. His friendship was on the line before his very eyes yet he felt so conflicted. He witnessed firsthand what would become of the changes he would experience if he went through with the plan. But he wanted to save him and with the way you were crying hysterically next to him, there was but one option he had right now and he could only pray that it actually worked. Time was running out, and Jongin's breathing slowed to a stop. It was now or never.

"O-okay, but you have to leave or else I won't do it." He didn't mean that but he knew how much it would hurt you to see what happened next. "Just trust me."

You nodded hesitantly and stood to leave the room. You left a small crack in the door to peek in. You watched him shakily grab Jongin and cradle his upper half in his arms. He looked down at him, tears painting his cheeks, scared of the outcome. Kyungsoo closed his eyes and took a deep breath, one that seemed to last for days on end. He lifted Jongin's body higher and bared his fangs. He opened his mouth wide and let them sink into Jongin's neck and it almost looked like he was trying to take a chunk of his flesh.

He stilled his movements for a while and when he let go, Jongin took a deep gasp, chest expanding as if his ribs would break. Kyungsoo held his hand in his and watched closely. What happened next made you cover your mouth to stop you from gasping or screaming. Jongin's body convulsed harshly, back arching from the pain that ran through his veins. He screamed in agony, hand clutching his chest. Tears flowed from his eyes as he writhed in pain, screaming, panting.

It was indeed hard watching your husband go through hell. He squeezed on the hand that Kyungsoo provided, trying to find any and every way to help him through this torment. The screaming didn't stop and eventually he resorted to calling out your name and begging for help. That was your last straw. You burst through the door and rushed to his side to coax him through his suffering.

"My love I'm here!" It came out more like a scream to combat the volume in which he was screaming.

His breathing increased more and now he was gasping for air. His eyes were rolling to the back of his head and his back arched one last time before his chest collapsed and his body grew limp. He was no longer breathing, nothing, still as the night wind. You and Kyungsoo watched him, you grabbing his hand for emotional support. You weren't ready to see Jongin like this, to imagine him in a coffin so soon if he didn't come to. Just when you were about to give up, he started to breath normally as if he wasn't thrashing in pain a few minutes ago. His eyes blinked open, a few tears prickling the sides.

It took him a few moments to get his bearings straight, but he eventually noticed the two pairs of eyes watching him like a hawk. "W-what happened? It feels like I died." He questioned as he sat up and looked between the both of you.

You both breathed a sigh of relief, happy he didn't end up on the side of this not working. He brought a hand up to his head, holding in the pain that throbbed in his brain. His eyes were glossy, blinking to bring him closer to reality. He reached over next to the bed and reached for the tall glass of water, lips plastered together from the lack of moisture. The clear liquid slid down his throat easily in one gulp but still not quenching his thirst. Kyungsoo carefully placed a hand on his shoulder, making him face his direction.

"Jongin that's not going to help. You need to-you need something else."

Jongin looked over at him and raised an eyebrow. Kyungsoo looked over at you and you understood faster than the disoriented man did. He pulled you in by the arms and you tilted your head so he had access to your neck. For the second time tonight, he pierced the skin with his fangs a bit more harshly this time and let the blood drip down to your collarbones. Like a flipped switch, Jongin was quickly lapping up the blood like he had been starved. It wasn't until after you flinched when you felt yourself slipping past the point of no return that he slowed down.

"That's enough Jongin, you're going to make her faint." Kyungsoo nudged him on the shoulder and broke him out of his hypnotic state.

Jongin sat back looking at the blood flow from your veins, not understanding what he's seeing. "W-what have I done?"

"I'm okay, you're okay. Kyungsoo saved you." You wrapped your arms around his shoulders trying to calm down his heavy breathing, the feeling being all too much for him. "Just relax, you're safe now."

He clung to your waist for a while, letting his heart rate slow down before he dared to move. If you asked him a few months ago what he’d be doing now, it definitely wouldn’t have anything to do with being a vampire. This changed so much for him, most importantly how now he was destined to live a life of eternity. But what about you? You were his top choice, his only choice. He wanted you and no one but you, yet your fates have changed in a matter of minutes.

He didn’t want to do it alone, of course Kyungsoo would be by his side like always but his wife, you were his everything. He wouldn’t pressure you, he wanted you to think about it on your own and make the decision for yourself, but god did he want it to happen soon if it were to happen at all. When he finally let go, his body felt normal, like it did just a week ago.

Breaking the silence with his voice felt like accepting the change so he opted for thanking Kyungsoo with a hug for now. He had so many questions, so many things he needed to know but right now he wanted to splash some cold water on his face as one last attempt at waking up from what felt like a dream.

Soon everything was back to its lively self, the sickness having ran its course. Jongin received much praise for how well he handled it on such short notice. His work was far from done, still he relished in his achievements and great performance.

You sat in the red and velvety chaise lounge with gold accents in Jongin’s study, Kyungsoo standing right by his side. They discussed further plans to deal with any similar situations with Kyungsoo being his newly appointed privy counselor.

You watched Jongin so closely now, curious if he’d go through any more changes or if all of Kyungsoo’s hard work would go down the drain. He reassured you saying, “don’t worry love, he’ll be just fine, his time isn’t running out any time soon” but you couldn’t let go of the thought of losing him, especially since you damn near witnessed it just a few nights ago.

You thought deeply about what he said, Jongin was no longer mortal, a perpetual promise of life. It wasn’t a new idea but now your mind couldn’t think of anything besides how scared you’d be dying alone. You had a daughter to worry about and a promise to keep to Jongin and if you were just as immortal, it would be easier to carry through.

“Bite me.” You say jolting from your seat.

Kyungsoo raised an eyebrow and chuckled, “What?”

“I want you to bite me too. I can’t be the only one here destined to my grave.”

He glanced over at Jongin who looked back at him. The taller man walks over to you and sits you in his lap.

“Are you sure you want this? I want you to be absolutely sure.” The stern look in his eyes almost made you shy away from your decision but there was nothing that would make you happier.

“I’m sure, I want to be your wife forever and I want our love to be imperishable.”

Kyungsoo walked over now and tilted your chin up, "You saw what Jongin went through, it's not easy. Even though it only lasted for 3 minutes, it feels like years." Jongin hummed in agreement behind you.

Every time you thought about your future, they were in it. Whether you were old or young, they were always there and you didn't want it any other way. As soon as you nodded, anxiety jumped in your nerves making it hard for you to not breathe heavily. The two men looked at each other as if silently making plans and Kyungsoo looked back down at you.

"If you're really sure about this, you need to relax."

As he finished his sentence, Jongin left open mouth kisses to your neck and just below your ear. If this was their plan to get you to relax, it definitely wasn't working. You were already so worked up and they barely did anything. Jongin was at your mouth, tongue exploring inside like he was searching for something and Kyungsoo kissed every inch of exposed skin as he removed your clothes.

All three of you were completely naked within a matter of minutes. Kyungsoo crouched down and threw your legs over his shoulders. His lips were hasty, moving up your inner thighs to eventually land on your pelvis. The little kisses up your stomach gave you butterflies. He joined Jongin at your neck, sucking, licking and biting, prepping the area for what's to come. His fingers were back between your legs and the other had his hands massaging your breasts.

"Are you ready love?" Jongin asks behind you and when you whimper in response, the fangs you were accustomed to sent a surge of pain through your neck.

It felt like hours before they released their grip, the feeling of cold running through your veins making your consciousness slip from you. It was almost scary how fast you were blacking out like they slyly injected anesthesia. Everything soon faded to darkness, you were in a pit of nothingness, floating endlessly. You reached out for stability, anything that made you feel safe, yet you were left grabbing thin air. A bright white light caught your attention, calling you closer.

When you felt within arms reach, it changed to red and your body was viciously pulled down. Now you were falling with nothing to hold onto and apparently nothing to land on. You were suddenly aware of the sharp pain in your neck, feeling much worse than you've ever felt before. It was excruciating and that said a lot as you knew of the pain of childbirth. As hard as you tried to bring a hand up to your neck to bring some relief, your limbs were nowhere to be found. You were falling faster and the pain only got worse to the point that it was hard to find the air in your lungs. You were choking; gasping for any gust of oxygen.

Just as you felt your body make a "crash landing", your eyes opened to you being in Kyungsoo's arms, your legs settled in Jongin's lap. You understood now how you weren't living your life to the fullest. The enhanced sensations were enough to make you believe in magic, you felt spellbound. You've never seen things so clearly, heard things so easily, smelled things so deeply. It was overwhelming nevertheless but the flood of thirst overpowered it all. You tried swallowing the little saliva you had left to hopefully coat your tongue. You sat up, getting nestled in between the two observing men.

"Come here." Kyungsoo pulled you more into his lap, rubbing your cheek with his thumb.

He offered his neck to you, ready to be victim to your first feeding. So when your teeth sank into his neck and this first drop of blood hit your tongue, it became clear just how easily he could have let his mind go blank and drink to his heart's desire all those times he gave in to his fierce impulses. You didn't have that type of self control just yet, gulping down the large amounts of the red liquid. He didn't push you away and you knew he wouldn't. He'd let you leave him with nothing but the feeling of contentment from you being the last thing he gets to lay his eyes on before he closed them for eternity. You hesitantly broke away, blood dripping from the sides of your mouth.

"Satisfied?" The look in his eyes was dark and surrounded in a lusty haze. He licked from where the drop ended on your neck and up to your lips where he swiped a tongue over them to slip it into your mouth. He sucked on your tongue to get the remainder and admittedly the action had you throbbing.

Everything felt so much more intense in this state, your senses awakened in the best way possible. Everything you craved from lust to hunger ate away at you down to the bone. He pushed his thumb past your lips and watched you through hooded lids as you sucked like you wanted the skin to fall off. Jongin was at your back, licking up your spine and came to bite down on your shoulder. Has pain always felt this good?

You moaned out a breathy "fuck" when Kyungsoo slowly played over your clit. "Good girl, that's it. Let us take care of you."

He leaned back and lifted you right over his eager dick. A moan fell past your lips as you eased down his length and he thrust up the rest of the way. The grip on your hips was sure to leave bruises tomorrow. Jongin slid a hand up the nape of your neck and gathered your hair within it and yanked your head toward him, making your back arch. He captured your lips in a sloppy kiss, frantically moving to your jaw and back. The man under you reached the deepest parts of you with the angle you gave him and you were clenching onto your sanity.

"Couldn't handle the thought of not having this forever my darling?" Jongin's breath was hot against your ear, sending shivers down your spine and to your core. "I wouldn't have been able to live without this pussy either."

He snaked an arm around your waist to taunt your clit with his fingers. The pleasure was immense, the salacious sounds being the perfect addition. Kyungsoo pulled out as he reached his orgasm and laid all the way back to bring you higher on his chest. Jongin took the opportunity to push into you without warning and set a merciless pace.

"You're so beautiful love, you're so perfect." Kyungsoo's praises made your head spin. "Be a good girl and cum while I'm watching."

Your walls fluttered against Jongin and he came within seconds. "Don't let it go to waste..." you craned your neck to look at him and you could feel his dick twitch inside you.

He slowly pulled out and watched his cum drip out of your swollen pussy. He used two fingers to fuck it back into you, following your directions. You all calmed down from your high and rested on the long chair; you on Kyungsoo's chest and Jongin using your butt as a pillow.

"Don't forget, we're yours until the end of time." Jongin spoke from his position behind you before quickly falling asleep.

You smirked against Kyungsoo's chest. "Will you stay this time my love?" You looked up at him with heavy lids, hoping he'd answer before you fell asleep.

"Well there's no need to rush, we have always and forever."

You looked forward to it, having your three, soon to be four favorite people in your life for as long as time went on. Though the journey had some rough patches, you finally made it. To the time that you wished for almost two years ago, when you thought you'd lose both men you've come to love.

cr to kgymz for divider

Y’all would never believe how many times I lost connection while writing this 🥲

#kyungsoo smut #exo smut #exo kyungsoo #exo do #exo do kyungsoo #exo kai #exo #exo jongin #vampire #kyungsoo x reader #kyungsoo x you #jongin #jongin smut #kai smut

81 notes · View notes