#c: shepherd evans

[alex-washington-rackets]

I'm glad your through the back end of it and you find things to be grateful for. i feel like i could have gone into a really dark place if it want for the people around me to keep me focused. Sounds like you had some good support structures.

Thanks. I feel like i could go a bit crazy not playing everyday. When i feel like its getting too much ill definitely hit you up.

Yeah definitely don't recommend going through it that's for sure. I'm a senior now so I've had time to process it but it came with therapy and a lot of rehab...a lot of just sitting there thinking. A lot of regret too. But every day I wake up I'm just glad I'm still here.

Well if you ever need someone to do rehab with, hit me up. Or if you need help with stuff. I know what you're going through I don't mind helping. That's pretty smart though- classes will be a good way to keep your mind busy.

[ladyeyrewrites]

Feelings Hurled Like Hand Grenades

Read from Chapter One

Rated M

3258 words

Chapter Eight: So Lovely and Small a Thing

TW: Mention of Matthew Shepherd's murder in the flashback

As much as Gina liked to cook and play hostess, she despised family holiday get-togethers. As a child, she’d been forced to be on her best behaviour despite the adults in her life (i.e. her father and brother) shouting at each other like children. As an adult, her preference would have been to avoid them altogether, only she’d always felt this need to serve as a buffer between the adult drama and the children.

Now that most of those children were adults who a.) didn’t talk to their father or b.) could stand on their own against him or c.) could serve as a buffer between their father and their younger siblings, Gina elected to forgo family holidays entirely, choosing instead to invite herself over to Tabitha’s. At least any shouting that happened over Tabitha’s Christmas Ham was likely to be a result of boisterousness and not a preamble to a brawl.

And yet, three weeks after forcing herself to tolerate her brother’s presence for the sake of celebrating her nephew Noah’s high school graduation, Gina now found herself bundled in a car with her nephew Michael and his daughters, Annie and Cassandra, to attend an Independence Day cookout hosted by people she’d never met. Though, Evan had told her so much about this Captain Robert Nash and his wife Sergeant Athena Grant that Gina almost felt as if she already knew them. They sounded kind, generous, selfless to a degree Gina found frankly preposterous. She couldn’t wait to meet them and the rest of the family her errant nephew had pieced together in LA.

Read the rest on Ao3 or below the cut

The house was situated in a quiet neighbourhood: ranch style with a sprawling yard, the kind of thing that was quickly become a thing of the past. Music and laughter carried from the backyard and the breeze carried the smell of grilled meat through the open car windows as Michael sent a text to Thomas telling him they’d arrived. Gina didn’t understand why Michael didn’t simply go up to the door and knock like a normal person, but she didn’t push him; he was already anxious enough.

“Will there be fireworks, Gigi?” little Cassandra asked.

“Contrary to common sense, yes,” said Gina, smiling at the diminutive her great niece had used. She didn’t usually hold with nicknames, probably because she’d always wished her name was longer, like Angelina, Regina, or Georgina. And yet, there was something about the way Michael’s children called her Gigi that warmed her heart. Although, really it was astonishing that there were any fireworks displays allowed in Southern California in July, even the official displays, given that the state was liable to go up like a tinder box at the slightest provocation.

“Here he comes,” said Michael, just as the front door to the Grant-Nash house opened, revealing Thomas looking relaxed in a short sleeved henley and light wash jeans. Evan trailed behind him in a t-shirt and shorts and Gina drew in a sharp breath, suddenly overcome with emotion at the sight of Thomas smiling at something Evan said and the easy intimacy they exuded. Tears pricked her eyes.

She took a moment to compose herself as the girls scrambled out of the car, eager to meet their uncle. Gina dabbed her eyes with one of the handkerchiefs her mother had always insisted on giving her every Christmas – monographed with her initials. Once she was certain she wouldn’t break into an unsightly display of tears, Gina checked her makeup in the visor mirror. There were no unsightly mascara runs so it would do.

A knock on the car window startled her and Gina looked up to see Evan gazing at her through the laminated glass, a look of concern crinkling his brow. “All good, Aunt Gina?” he asked.

Gina thought about brushing his question aside as he opened the door and helped her out, but there was something about his genuine worry for her well being that brought the truth to her lips. “I’ve never been good at holidays,” she said. “They always feel like a war zone.”

Evan chuckled as he offered her his arm and escorted her into the house in the wake of the others. “It’s a lot of new people, I know,” he said. “But they’re all going to love you. And if you want to ease your way into things, you can always hang out with Athena and me in the kitchen.

The house was open floorplan which ordinarily Gina didn’t like, but this managed to feel grounded and homey rather than echoing and empty, and the space was clearly designed for entertaining. Although, the indoor space was empty at the moment as everyone was gathered outside on the spacious patio. Well, not quite empty. A dark-skinned black woman with a sensible bob stood in the kitchen brushing marinade over chicken wings.

“Buck, there you are!” the woman called. “These are almost ready for you to take out to Bobby.”

Evan grinned as he guided Gina into the kitchen. “Hey Athena, there’s someone I want you to meet.”

The woman – Athena – paused her work and looked up at Gina with a grin. “You must be Tommy’s aunt.” She wiped her hands off on a kitchen towel and offered one to Gina. “Buck’s been singing your praises down at the station.”

Gina smiled and extracted herself from Evan’s escort, offering her own hand. Athena gave her a handshake gentle enough that Gina hardly felt it in her hands, for which she was grateful. So often, when meeting large groups of new people, Gina came away feeling as though she’d been punching a wall. That had been one bright side during the pandemic: no handshakes. “And you must be Athena,” she said. “It’s an absolute pleasure to meet you. Thank you for having us.” She rounded the corner so that she stood on the same side of the kitchen island as Athena. “Now, is there anything I can do to help?”

Athena Grant did not look like the kind of person who welcomed strangers into her kitchen and Gina could respect that, but Gina wasn’t ready to face all the introductions just yet, so she took a chance. While Athena gave her an assessing look over, Gina glanced out the window and spotted Thomas introducing Michael to a man in his mid-to-late fifties manning the grill. The girls were off playing with a group of children who seemed to range in age from five or six to mid-teens.

The sheer harmoniousness of it all was positively baffling. Everyone seemed to be getting along and enjoying each other’s company. There were no forced smiles or tense conversations, no hint of a fight brewing under the surface. These people all seemed to genuinely enjoy spending time together like it wasn’t an obligation.

“You want an apron?” Athena asked. “My corn shucking assistants all wandered off.”

“I could help,” Evan offered.

“You, take these chicken parts over to Bobby and go see if your sister needs any help with that little nephew of yours,” said Athena, handing Evan the dish of marinated chicken.

“Yes, ma’am.” Evan saluted her before spinning on his heel and joining the others outside.

Athena shook her head, barely suppressing a smile. “You drink?” she asked. “We have zero alcohol options if not.”

“I most definitely drink,” said Gina. “In moderation. The addictive personality seems to have skipped me.” Unless loneliness counted as an addiction. She accepted the offered apron and tied it around her waist, one eye on Michael.

“It’s a pretty good vantage point, isn’t it?” said Athena. She brought out two wine glasses and poured them each some Reisling. Gina wasn’t typically a fan of white wine, but this had a decent nose to it and her mother would rise from the dead to remind Gina of her manners if she refused.

“Is that your husband?” She asked, nodding to the man with a beatific smile who was listening to Michael talk enthusiastically about whatever it was that had Michael enthused today.

“That’s Bobby, yeah,” said Athena. A fond smile played across her lips and softened her eyes.

“How long have you been married?” Gina asked. She set her wine aside and began the task of shucking corn. Picking the strands of silk away from the cobs was a bit hard on her hands, but she could soldier through.

“Seven years now,” said Athena. She hefted a pineapple out of the fridge and set it on the chopping block. She gave it a careful assessment before diving in with her knife, flaying the scale-like skin.

“Second marriage?” Gina asked and maybe she was prying, but she sensed there was a sadness in Athena somewhat akin to her own, a loss that was unfathomable to anyone who hadn’t suffered in the same way.

Athena nodded. “My first husband came out as gay eight years ago,” she said. “He and his husband split their time between Florida and Haiti now.”

“That must have been hard,” Gina said.

Athena snorted and paused her pineapple butchery to take a sip of wine, leaving sticky fingerprints on her glass. “I was angry for a long time,” she said. “But I think I was angriest with myself, because deep down I knew the truth and I let him lie to me anyway because I was so tired of being alone.”

Gina paused in her shucking, blinking back the second urge to cry she’d felt today. “You lost someone, didn’t you,” she said. “Even before your husband.”

Athena nodded. “So did you.”

Gina sighed and took up the corn once more. “How did you find the courage to stop being alone?” she asked.

Athena shook her head. “I don’t think it was about courage,” she said. “I knew I wanted kids, and time was running out on that front and so I picked a man I thought would be a good father and who’d be good to me, but I don’t think that’s something that interested you.”

Gina laughed. “No,” she affirmed. “I never wanted children. Or a man for that matter.” She sighed. “My best friend says it’s time for me to put myself out there again, and I just can’t picture what that would even look like. I mean, the last time I went looking for a partner was the nineties, and I moved in with the first girl I danced with.” Why was it so much easier to tell this virtual stranger that she was a lesbian than it had been to come out to her own nephews?

Athena laughed. “The dating scene has changed a lot since then,” she said. “Nowadays it’s all apps and dating sites.”

“How did you and Bobby meet?” Gina asked, the nickname feeling wrong on her tongue, but it seemed that nobody called Captain Nash Robert. She could get away with full-naming her nephews because she was related to them and it was just one of her quirky aunt traits that they could find endearing. Evan didn’t seem to care that she used his name instead of calling him Buck. At least, she assumed that he’d tell her to call him Buck if it really mattered that much to him.

“Oh, we’d known each other a while before we got together,” said Athena. “From the job.”

Just then the door opened, and two more women entered from the patio. “You get lost in here, ‘Thena?” asked the woman with the shaved head and wide framed glasses.

“We were going to offer to help with the corn, but it seems like you’ve got that covered,” said the woman with the honey coloured locs.

“Hen, Karen, this is Tommy’s Aunt Gina,” said Athena, plating up the fruit and skewering each piece with a toothpick.

After another round of gentle handshakes, Hen and Karen poured themselves some of the Reisling and leaned against the opposite side of the island, having been shooed away by Athena.

“I gotta say, you don’t really look old enough to be Tommy’s Aunt,” said Hen.

Gina shrugged. “I was twelve when he was born,” she said. “I’m actually closer in age to Tommy than he is to his younger half-siblings.”

Karen shook her head, a look of awe on her face. “Families are such beautiful and messy things,” she said and her eyes tracked a lanky teenaged boy patiently playing with some of the younger children in the backyard.

“Messy, yes,” said Gina. “I don’t think anyone ever accused us Kinards of being a particularly beautiful family.” She started returning the shucked corn cobs to the pot they’d been in before, where they could wait whatever fate was in store for them.

“Tommy never really talked about his family while we were working together,” said Hen. “Although, back then, we weren’t really much of a family.”

“What changed?” Gina asked.

“Buck,” all three women said at the same time. And then they laughed.

And Gina could see how Evan could work his way into the cracks of anyone’s armour and force his way inside. She’d experienced it herself that first time she’d invited Thomas and Evan to come to dinner, when seeing his open affection with her nephew had had her spilling a secret she’d thought she’d carry tucked under her breastbone until she died and it would be snuffed out with the final beat of her heart. “I’m glad Tommy found him,” Gina said.

“I’m glad they found each other,” said Hen. “They’re both the happiest I’ve ever seen them.”

They lapsed into wine-sipping silence while Athena finished her fruit salad, and a growing dread filled Gina as she realised she couldn’t hide in the kitchen with these delightful women for much longer.

But soon, any thoughts of her own dread were forgotten when Karen casually reached over and took Hen’s hand and pulled her over for a kiss and it was so lovely and small a thing, so everyday and yet so extraordinary because this was the life Siobhan had wanted for them, the quiet confidence to simply be out in the world together and unafraid. And oh, how Gina regretted not being able to give her that.

1998

Gina never meant to come back home. She’d spent eighteen years dreaming of the day she could leave. Four years studying to become a journalist, dreams of Pulitzer pushing her onward.

She’d paused those dreams for two glorious years, cocooned with Siobhan in the apartment they shared. Well, the pause wasn’t intentional, necessarily. She was trying to find a job at a newspaper or a magazine, but nowhere seemed to take her seriously. She’d either be writing puff pieces or fetching the editor’s coffee, so in the meantime, she worked at a bookstore and tried to build her portfolio by writing for a lesbian zine one of Siobhan’s friends ran. It was interesting writing, but Gina had never truly had the heart of an activist.

In the meantime, her mother sent her letter after letter telling Gina how much she wished she’d come back home, how lonely it was now that Bella had moved out east to be closer to her husband’s family, and didn’t Gina want to spend more time with her nephews?

Gina sighed, putting down the latest letter. Mother had also been placing long distance calls recently, which was entirely counter to her frugal sensibilities.

“You want to go back,” Siobhan said. It wasn’t accusatory, but rather like Siobhan was saying out loud the thought Gina had been circling around, refusing to admit to herself let alone out loud because as soon as she spoke the words, her mother’s guilt trap would slam shut and Gina would never be able to escape again.

“My life is here, now,” Gina tried to insist, voice lacking conviction even to her own ears. “You’re here.”

“I can come with you,” said Siobhan.

Gina swept her eye over Siobhan with her buzzed short hair and her tattoos and her lip ring and tried to picture her back home, sitting at Mother’s table. She couldn’t see it. “You’d hate it,” she said.

“It’ll be an adventure,” said Siobhan. “It’ll be fun to pretend to be a small-town girl.” She let her voice slip into something resembling a drawl.

Ordinarily Gina might have laughed, but she thoughts were too swampy to find humour in much of any thing.

Why was Siobhan so enthusiastic about moving home with Gina when the very idea filled Gina with dread? Why would Siobhan want to leave the city where they could openly be themselves? Where their friends were all gay or lesbian or some other manner of other that society would prefer to ignore at best or purge from existence at worst. Her thoughts flashed to poor Matthew Shepherd, who just a month before had been killed in the most horrendous way simply for being openly gay in a small town, by men who reminded her of her brother. The very thought made Gina’s stomach sour, roiling with fear and rage in equal and irreconcilable parts.

“We couldn’t be as open as we are here,” said Gina. Surely that would convince Siobhan that they shouldn’t move, that they should root themselves here in the city and forget the small-minded places that had birthed them. She hated to think what Jonathan would do if he found out she was lesbian. What he’d do to Siobhan.

And for that matter, what would her own very Catholic mother have to say about it?

Nothing good, Gina was sure. “We can’t tell anyone we’re together. They could only ever see us as very good friends. Are you sure that’s what you want?”

“Fine, history can say we were roommates,” Siobhan flipped her onto her back and settled between Gina’s thighs, a wicked grin on her face. “I don’t care so long as we know the truth.”

2025

Maybe it was the wine, or maybe it was how immediately comfortable these three women made her feel, but Gina found herself telling Athena, Hen, and Karen about Siobhan, about how they’d met and how they’d ended, nothing too explicit, just their bare bones of their story.

The injustice of it all.

The dreadful not knowing what Siobhan’s parents had done with her remains.

The lack of a proper goodbye that had followed her for the last twenty-years, chaining her to the past.

“That’s awful,” said Karen, tears on her open face.

“I can’t imagine what that must have been like, not being about to say goodbye.” Hen shook her head. “That was cruel.”

“I could do some digging,” said Athena. “See if I can find out if she was buried and where.”

Gina had long since given up the idea that she’d ever be able to tell Siobhan a proper goodbye. “You’d do that?” Could she dare to trust the hope blossoming in her heart? “But we’ve only just met.”

“Well, if you’re Tommy’s family that means you’re Bucks family,” said Athena. “And if you’re Buck’s family, you’re our family.” Hen and Karen nodded along as if it was as obvious as gravity: a law of the universe.

And Gina let herself give into tears, let them fall from her lashes onto her cheeks, streaking them with mascara that was decidedly not waterproof. “Please help me find her,” Gina hated to beg, but this was about Siobhan.

“Of course,” said Athena and she enfolded Gina in a hug that Karen and Hen soon joined and never before had Gina found herself at the centre of so much love.

[obitez]

White Lies and Big Dogs

Sequel to Meetings. Partial sequel to Fur Face.

~~~~~~~~~

The Buckleys, Evan’s parents, were planning a trip back to California after almost a year away. 

The last time they had been out there was shortly after Maddie announced her second pregnancy, and now… almost eight months later and three weeks after Maddie gave birth, they were making a trip to visit their newest grandchild. 

Which Tommy had no problem with, not really. For everything that he had heard about them from Maddie and Chimney, even though Evan still had some problems with them, they were pretty great grandparents to Jee, so Tommy couldn’t fault them for wanting to visit their newest grandchild. 

Even Evan’s rocky relationship with them had improved over time. Improved as in… Evan liked communicating and catching up with them over the phone, text, and email, but in person? … He still didn’t like to interact with them much in person. 

So what problem exactly did Tommy have with everything right now?

It was simple… kind of. 

Two months ago the Buckleys sent their yearly Christmas presents to him and Evan. And while the gifts themselves were great, they included an additional gift card to Petsmart…

for the dog Tommy lied to the Buckleys about having.

Tommy would have completely forgotten about the little (well, maybe big depending on how you look at it) white lie he had told Buck’s parents about why he suddenly had to leave Chim’s house that one day. 

Hell, Tommy had forgotten about the lie by the time he had turned his truck off Chimney’s street. 

Tommy was only reminded about it last month, when the Buckleys sent them the Petsmart gift card in addition to their Christmas presents. 

Evan had been confused about what his parents were talking about when he read the note attached to the card, and so was Tommy for about fifteen minutes, until they started watching a TV show where the characters were complaining about not knowing how to build a baby crib. 

Tommy should have told Evan about it then. 

Evan had known about the awkward and very unexpected meet-up Tommy had with the Buckleys, Tommy had told Evan everything about it later that same day. 

But Tommy had forgotten to tell Evan exactly how he was able to escape Chimney’s. 

He would have told Evan the complete story right then but, as he looked down at the man sleeping leant right against his arm, Tommy didn’t have the heart to wake his boyfriend up. It wasn’t until halfway through the next morning as he showed up at harbor for his next shift that Tommy remembered needing to tell Evan again, but the start of shifts were always the most busy with equipment and helicopter checks, he didn’t have the time. 

When Evan came home a week later, asking if it would be alright if they pet sat for a guy on C-shift, and have his ‘oh so loveable eighty pound ball of fluff in their house for a couple days while his owner needs to attend a funeral across the country,’ Tommy didn’t even have any objections at first. 

Tommy had nothing against dogs, nothing at all. He and Evan had talked about getting a dog or cat a couple times since they moved in together seven months ago. But well… life kept getting in the way, as it always did. 

Then Evan had mentioned that they would need to pet sit the dog during the same week that the Buckleys would be in town. 

And Tommy could work with that, somehow. 

Tommy could definitely work with that. 

Meeting the dog was something else entirely. Evan had been right when he called the dog a ‘giant ball of fluff.’ A large, hairy, german shepherd who, when standing on its hind legs could reach up to Tommy chest. A german shepherd, who even at the age of eight years old when most dogs start to settle down energy-wise, still loved to jump and run around every time he or Evan so much as moved off the couch. 

Tommy thought it was hilarious when Evan said that the dog’s name was Buck.

He was also pretty happy that, despite the dog’s high energy levels, he wasn’t prone to chewing up furniture. 

And really, the Buckleys should have never met dog-Buck. 

The original plan had nothing to do with them ever coming over to his and Evan’s house while they were in Los Angeles. And that had nothing really to do with the rocky relationship Evan had with them or that Tommy just felt weird when people stayed over for more than one or two days. 

They just simply didn't have enough space for them. 

When, ten years ago, Tommy decided he should finally start to be an adult and buy an actual house, all his savings could really afford the down payment for was a small two bed townhouse. Tommy was just happy it had an attached garage with a driveway driveway and was in a safe part of town. At the time he was in a long single spell and had thought that being a homeowner might make him more desirable (it didn’t really change anything dating wise). 

Anyway, with one of the bedrooms being used as their bedroom and the other as a home office/storage room, there wasn’t much room for guests unless said guests wanted to sleep on the couch or an air mattress. 

And with Maddie and Chimney’s place having the same circumstance (including an additional bedroom being taken up by Jee), the Buckleys had decided to go to a hotel for the week they would be here. 

Tommy couldn’t really blame them. They certainly could afford it. 

And since the entire reason for the Buckleys visit was to see their grandchildren at Maddie and Chimney’s place, the Buckleys really should have never come to Tommy and Evan’s. 

But someone at some point this week mentioned the old car Tommy was working on restoring, and it seemed Maddie and Chimney needed some excuse to get her parents out of the house (“Just for an afternoon, Tommy,” Chimney pleaded.) Philip had asked if they could come see the car. 

Tommy hated whoever had given Chimney his work schedule. He knew it wasn’t Evan,  Chimney had it before he ever met Evan. 

Dog-Buck, although a giant ball of fluff that wanted to jump and cuddle with every being who didn’t look at him with contempt, was like every other dog on the planet. As soon as the Buckleys rang on the door bell, the dog barrelled off from where he was cuddled next to Evan on the couch to run straight up to the door. 

“Oh come on Buck, don’t jump on them,” Evan said as he tried to grab the dog and stop him from jumping up as he opened the front door. “Oh, hi Dad,” Buck greeted the older man. 

“Good morning,” Philip greeted them. Then his eyes turned down to the dog standing in between Buck’s legs. “So, this is…”

“This is Dog-Buck,” Tommy said, introducing the dog. The simpler the introduction, the better, Tommy figured, before Evan had a chance to expose the whole white lie that had gotten way out of hand.

“Dog-Buck?” Margret repeated as she looked down at the dog with a mix of confusion and fondness. Huh, Tommy thought. The Buckleys must be dog people, who would have thought?

“Yeah,” Buck chuckled as he knelt down to rub the dog’s chest. “Isn’t it hilarious?” 

“You named the dog Buck?” Philip asked after initial introductions were made and Evan had gone off to get them some drinks, dog-Buck remaining standing next to Tommy’s legs. 

“Well, we didn’t name him,” Tommy said, stumbling over his words. “He was a rescue… of sorts… and we didn’t have the heart to change his name.”

“Oh,” Philip said. “I guess that makes sense.”

It was about forty five minutes after his parents showed up that Buck was starting to grow suspicious. He knew Tommy had met his parents a handful of times, once when he wasn’t around, and he knew that Tommy spent nearly all of that time trying to avoid them and talk to them as little as possible. 

So why, Buck was asking himself, was Tommy bringing it upon himself to keep talking to them today? Even jumping into Buck’s conversation with his mom? 

“Is there a reason you keep butting in whenever my parents start talking about dog-Buck?” Evan asked as he leaned up against Tommy and wrapped his arms around his torso in a hug. 

“What?... What are you talking about?” Tommy asked in that voice he used whenever he was trying to hide something from Buck. Only - it never worked and it was always completely obvious to Buck with how Tommy’s voice would change pitch and he would pointedly look away and refuse to make eye contact with anyone. 

It was cute, if you’d ask him. 

“I can tell you’re lying,” Buck said and watched as a firm line appeared between Tommy’s lips. “You… You like the dog, don’t you?” Buck asked as he tightened his arms just a little more around his boyfriend. 

“Of - of course I like him,” Tommy flustered as his eyes shifted to watch the dog roll around in the backyard grass. He could feel his cheeks growing warm as he said it, an old annoying habit he had when he lied. “He’s a good dog.”

Buck felt his face break out into a grin. “Well, I’m sorry to say that we can’t keep dog-Buck. Johnny and his kids will be very upset if we did that. But we can start looking at dogs again afterwards.” 

Tommy laughed. “Yeah, we can start doing that again.” 

“Great!”

The Buckleys didn’t stay for much longer after that. 

Apparently outside of Tommy’s car maintenance, there wasn’t much more that held their attention around here. Maybe they weren’t as much of a dog-people as Tommy thought. Then again, they gave them a $50 Petsmart gift card without even meeting their dog. 

Watching them leave his house and head to their rental car parked on the street, Tommy realized he survived it. Survived the entire encounter without Buck figuring out he lied to his parents, and without Buck’s parents figuring out he lied to them. Tommy realized he had now dug himself into a much larger, much deeper hole with this whole thing. But how did the saying go? 

That was something for future Tommy to worry about? 

Yeah, that was something for future Tommy to worry about. 

[identity-library]

Mental Health (TV Shows)

A:

Alladin (1994)

Mechanicles (Low Vision)

B:

Big City Greens (2018)

Alice Green (Phobia - Snakes)

C:

Chicago Med (2015)

Jason Wheeler (Addiction - Alcohol/Drugs, Suicidal Ideation)

D:

Dead End: Paranormal Park (2022)

Barney Guttman (Abuse)

Norma Khan (Anxiety)

Dirty God (2019)

Jade (Abuse)

Doom Patrol (2019)

Kay Challis/Crazy Jane (Abuse, DID)

E:

Empire (2015)

Andre Lyon (Bipolar Disorder)

ER (1994)

John Carter (Addiction - Drugs)

Euphoria (2019)

Jules Vaughn (Depression)

F:

G:

Get Ed (2005)

Loogie (Dissociative Identity Disorder)

Glee (2009)

Emma Pillsbury (OCD)

Grey's Anatomy (2005)

Amelia Shepherd (Addiction - Drugs)

Andrew DeLuca (Bipolar Disorder)

Charlotte King (Addiction - Drugs)

Jo Wilson (Depression, PTSD)

Miranda Bailey (OCD)

Owen Hunt (PTSD)

Richard Webber (Addiction - Alcohol)

H:

Happy Tree Friends (1999)

Flippy (PTSD)

Petunia (OCD, Phobia - Germs)

Hazbin Hotel (2024)

Angel Dust (Addiction - Drugs)

House (2004)

Gregory House (Addiction - Drugs)

I:

Inside Job (2021)

Andre Lee (Addiction, Anxiety, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)

Reagan Ridley (Trauma)

J:

Jessica Jones (2015)

Jessica Jones (Addiction - Alcohol, PTSD)

K:

L:

Lilo & Stitch: The Series (2003)

Clyde (Kleptomania)

M:

M*A*S*H (1972)

Benjamin-Frankling "Hawkeye" Pierce (Claustrophobia)

Mom (2013)

Bonnie Plunkett (Addiction - Alcohol/Drugs)

Christy Plunkett (Addiction - Alcohol/Gambling)

Marjorie Armstrong (Addiction - Alcohol)

Ray Stabler (Addiction - Drugs)

Regina Tompkins (Addiction - Drugs)

Moon Knight (2022)

Marc Spector/Moon Knight (Autistic, Dissociative Identity Disorder)

N:

NCIS: Los Angeles (2009)

Alex Kilbride (Addiction - Substances, Depression)

NCIS: New Orleans (2014)

Patton Plame (Addiction - Gambling)

New Amsterdam (2018)

Lauren Bloom (Addiction - Drugs)

New Girl (2011)

Ernie "Coach" Tagliaboo (Phobia - Boats)

Jessica Day (Claustrophobia, Phobia - Tight Spaces)

Winston Bishop (Panic Attacks)

O:

P:

Person of Interest (2011)

Harold Finch (Anxiety, PTSD)

Private Practice (2007)

Violet Turner (PTSD)

Q:

R:

Roswell, New Mexico (2019)

Alex Manes (Abuse, PTSD)

S:

Station 19 (2018)

Jack Gibson (PTSD)

Robert Sullivan (Addiction - Drugs)

Sean Beckett (Addiction - Alcohol)

Stumptown (2019)

Dex Parios (PTSD)

T:

The Healing Powers of Dude (2020)

Noah Ferris (Anxiety Disorder)

The Infinity Train (2019)

Simon Laurent (Abuse, NPD, PTSD)

The Lion Guard (2016)

Ono (Phobia - Bats)

The Magicians (2015)

Eliot Waugh (Abuse, Addiction - Alcohol)

The Prodigal Son (2019)

Malcolm Bright (Night Terrors, PTSD)

The Second Best Hospital in the Galaxy (2024)

Dr. Klak (Anxiety)

The Simpsons (1989)

Abe Simpson || (Dementia, PTSD)

Artie Ziff (Narcissism)

Bart Simpson (PTSD)

Carl Carlson (Schizophrenia)

Clancy Bouvier (PTSD)

Gary Chalmers (Aerophobia, Anxiety, Borderline Personality Disorder, Intermittent Explosive Disorder)

Gloria Prince (Kleptomania)

Homer Simpson (Kleptomania, PTSD)

Lisa Simpson (Anxiety, Depression, OCD, PTSD)

Marge Simpson (OCD)

Ned Flanders (OCD)

Nigel (Anxiety)

Richard "Rich" Texan (OCD)

Seymour Skinner (PTSD)

Shauna Chalmers (Intermittent Explosive Disorder, ODD)

Snake Jailbird (Kleptomania)

Willie (Intermittent Explosive Disorder)

Total Drama (Franchise)

David "Dave" (Anxiety

Jay (Anxiety, Phobias)

Mickey (Anxiety, Phobias)

Mike (Dissociative Identity Disorder)

Sam (Addiction)

Shawn (Anxiety)

U:

V:

W:

X:

Y:

Z:

#:

9-1-1 (2018)

Robert "Bobby" Nash (Addiction - Alcohol)

Edmundo "Eddie" Diaz (Anxiety, PTSD)

Evan "Buck" Buckley (PTSD)

Christopher "Chris" Diaz (PTSD)

Maddie Buckley (Postpartum Depression, PTSD)

9-1-1: Lone Star (2020)

Judson "Judd" Ryder (Grief, PTSD)

Tyler Kennedy "TK" Strand (Addiction - Alcohol)

[oculiaperticlausi]

— INTRODUCTING CHASE WILLIAMS

welcome to marina, CHASE WILLIAMS ( cis man, he/him ) ! they are a TWENTY-EIGHT year old who has lived over on MARINA HEIGHTS for WHOLE LIFE and works as a NFL QUARTERBACK. everyone says they look a lot like MICHAEL EVANS BEHLING. what do you think? — ALYSSA, 29, PST, SHE/HER.

b a c k g r o u n d;

Chase Williams grew up on Marina Heights, being the son of the coach for the football team that resides on the island, a coach who took the time to championships on more than one occasion and a mom who was a voice for women trying to get out of situations.

He was also a big brother, his little sister Kaylin (can be changed if someone picks her up). In many ways, the two siblings were more alike than they would have admitted. Their humor, their charismatic ways and finding things they were good at. While she was good with schooling, he was good at sports.

There wasn't a single person he didn't become friends, some people didn't like him for his flirtatious ways or even his ego because to some he would act like he was all that.

At sixteen, he met a girl, one that would become the first greatest love of his life. They were together for prom, graduation and she even followed him when he got accepted into one of the best schools on the island for football.

At eighteen, she got pregnant. There was nothing more exciting to him than starting a family with the girl he loved despite how young a lot of people around them thought they were.

But tragedy would strike after the baby was born, they would get in a car accident that would take the baby from them and destroy a relationship he thought would last forever.

After that he buried himself in school, working toward his goal of playing football professional.

During drafting night, he got drunk at a bar where he met a girl who he would get black out wasted with, marry and be abandoned by in the matter of twenty-four hours.

He was never able to track her down, so the best thing he did was try to pretend it never happened.

He remained focused on his career, working his way up to the ranks and becoming quarterback within a few years. He is still a charming flirt but hasn't taken any relationship to the next level and still focuses on his family.

c o n n e c t i o n s;

baby mama/first love —

drunk wife — alara kayacan

sister —

best friend —

hookups/flings — eden shepherd, natalia dubois

exes (good or bad terms) —

friends — asya sahin (family friends), apple kiraz (banter buddies), sebastian holm (unlikey friends), gabriel leone,

can't stand each other — valentina flores

[lotuscricket]

MIE vs ADKR Dream11 Prediction Today Match, Top Fantasy Picks, Player News, 17th T20, ILT20 2025

Hello doston! 👋 MIE vs ADKR Dream11 prediction ke liye swagat hai! MI Emirates aur Abu Dhabi Knight Riders ke beech ek dhamakedar takkar hone wali hai ILT20 2025 ke 17th T20 match mein. Match hoga 24th January 2025 ko Sheikh Zayed Stadium, Abu Dhabi mein, aur timing hai 8:00 PM IST. Kya aap ready ho apni Dream11 team banane ke liye? Chaliye match ki details, pitch report aur top fantasy picks ke saath ek perfect team create karte hain! 💪 Match Details MatchMIE vs ADKR, 17th T20, ILT20 2025Date24th January 2025Time8:00 PM ISTVenueSheikh Zayed Stadium, Abu DhabiLive StreamingZee 5 Pitch & Weather Report 🏟️ Pitch Report: Sheikh Zayed Stadium ki pitch batting-friendly hai, jahan par first innings ka average score 187 runs ke aas-paas rehta hai. Bowlers ko achhi line aur length pe daalne par hi madad milegi. 🌦️ Weather Report: Mausam kaafi shandar lag raha hai. Maximum temperature 23°C ke aas-paas rahega aur baarish ke bahut kam chances hain. Ek perfect cricketing night hone wali hai! Team Update / Player Availability 👉 MI Emirates aur Abu Dhabi Knight Riders ke camps se ab tak koi injury news nahi aayi hai. Predicted Playing XI

MI Emirates: - Tom Banton - Romario Shepherd - Fareed Ahmad - Akeal Hosein - Daniel Mousley - Andre Fletcher - Fazalhaq Farooqi - Kieron Pollard (C) - Muhammad Waseem - Muhammad Rohid Khan - Vijayakanth Viyaskanth Abu Dhabi Knight Riders: - Andries Gous - Joe Clarke (wk) - Andre Russell - David Willey - Roston Chase - Charith Asalanka - Sunil Narine (C) - Gudakesh Motie - Ali Khan - Laurie Evans - Michael Pepper Top Fantasy Picks Captain Choice: 💥 Nicholas Pooran: Pooran ke consistent batting performance aur high-pressure situations mein calmness unhe ek solid Dream11 captain banata hai. Woh innings ko anchor karte hue last ke overs mein accelerate karte hain, jo aapke fantasy points badhata hai. Vice-Captain Choice: 🔥 Fazalhaq Farooqi: Farooqi apne lethal bowling spells se kaafi impactful rahe hain. Crucial moments par wickets lene ki unki ability unhe ek strong vice-captain pick banati hai. Dream11 Team Suggestions Grand League Team:

CategoryPlayersWicketkeepersN Pooran, T BantonBattersK PereraAll-roundersS Narine, J Holder (VC), A Hosein, K Mayers, R Shepherd (C)BowlersD Willey, A Joseph, F Farooqi Head-to-Head Team:

CategoryPlayersWicketkeepersN Pooran, J Clarke, T BantonBattersK PereraAll-roundersA Russell, J Holder, K MayersBowlersAli Khan, D Willey, A Joseph, F Farooqi (VC) Who Will Win Today’s Match? 💬 Prediction: MI Emirates ka squad kaafi strong lag raha hai, aur unka overall balance unhe ek edge deta hai. Humari prediction ke hisaab se MI Emirates is match ke vijeta rahenge! 🏆 Aapka Dream11 team kaisa lag raha hai? Apne thoughts aur comments share karein! Best of luck for your fantasy cricket journey! 😍 Read the full article

[chrancecriber]

Antenne Vorarlberg Chillout Lounge (July 18, 2023)

23:57 Beyhude - Alabora 23:55 Dimitri Vegas - Pull Me Closer 23:50 The Funky Lowlives - Time To Let Go 23:46 Lstn - Sky & Sand 23:43 Kygo & Tina Turner - What's Love Got To Do With It 23:39 Alan Walker - Alone (Restrung) 23:37 Yves V X Bashkar - Halfway (Feat. Twan Ray) 23:30 Leftfield - Original 23:27 Nora En Pure - Life On Hold 23:25 Nathan Evans - Wellerman (220 Kid X Billen Ted Remix) 23:21 Air - Talisman 23:18 Carstn & Ten Tonne Skeleton - Safety Dance 23:14 Schiller - Midnight In Shiraz 23:08 Jody Wisternoff Feat. Sian Evans - The Bridge (Chicane Rework) 23:02 The Last Atlant - Twin Of The Sun 22:59 Mike Candys & Jack Holiday - Saltwater (Rework) 22:55 Liberdade - Otra Vida 22:52 Kai Schwarz, Cayus & Yass - My Love Is Your Love 22:48 Arty Feat. Cimo Fränkel - Daydreams (Sultan Shepard Echoes) 22:43 Les Negresses Vertes - Face A La Mer 22:40 Blank & Jones Feat. Mick Roach - Magnolia 22:35 Buttha - Oceanic (Original Mix) 22:32 Dj Antoine Feat. Craig Smart - Good Vibes (Good Feeling) (Dj Antoine Vs Mad Mark 2k19 Mix) 22:28 Duboss - Losing My Religion 22:23 Aisen - Another Day 22:20 Chicane Feat. Bryan Adams - Don't Give Up 22:17 York - On The Beach (Kryder & Jenjammin Sax Edit) 22:10 Sans Souci - Seaside (Extended Mix) 22:07 Chaël Feat Kaii - Don't Speak 22:04 Cotone - Faded Glory 22:02 Robert Manos - With No End 21:58 Sneaker Pimps - 6 Underground 21:56 Felix Jaehn & The Stickmen Project Feat. Calum Scott - Rain In Ibiza 21:49 Jan Blomqvist - The Space In Between 21:46 Melokind - Tiefgang 21:43 Lucas Estrada, Twopilots - Bloom 21:40 Brando - Don't Call Me (Galantis Remix) 21:37 Alok Feat. Alida - Love Again 21:33 Jan Blomqvist, Elena Pitoulis - More (Original Mix) 21:31 Carstn, Jason Walker - Could You Love Me (Munich Monstrs Remix) 21:23 Armin Van Buuren & Avira Feat. Sam Martin - Mask 21:20 Sam Feldt - Post Malone (Feat. Rani) 21:17 Kungs Feat. Jhart - Dopamine 21:11 Airstream - Your Tears (Del Mar Mix) 21:08 Justin Robertson Presents Revtone - Love Movement 21:04 Monoir, Eneli - 3 To 1 21:01 Martin Trevy Feat. Hedara - Talking To The Silence 20:57 Blank & Jones - Flaming June 20:54 Lucas Estrada & Henri Purnell & Neimy - In My Fantasy 20:49 Ohm-g - Hulectric Soul 20:46 Nora Van Elken - Sumatra (Lstn Remix) 20:43 Hallmann - Always Be 20:37 Parra For Cuva Feat. Anna Naklab - Wicked Games 20:34 Bolier & Arman Cekin - Fade Away (Feat. Rhi'n'b) 20:31 Sum Wave - Backyard Stories 20:28 Kygo Feat. Ellie Goulding - First Time 20:25 Alle Farben & Flynn - I Need To Know 20:22 Passenger 10 - Serving The World 20:18 Avicii - For A Better Day 20:11 David Hohme - Fear Less (Hraach Remix) 20:08 Hagen Feetly - Cry 20:05 Lost Frequencies, Janieck Devy - Reality 20:02 Tomas Skyldeberg - Outside The Window 19:59 Night Cruzer - Timeless 19:56 Dj Antoine & Dead-line - Shout 19:52 Ck West & Sassi K - C Song 19:47 Mahoroba - Chimes In Motion (Passion Cut) 19:43 Edx Feat. Jess Ball - Take Me Home 19:40 Glockenbach - Dirty Dancing 19:37 El Profesor - Bella Ciao (Hugel Remix) 19:35 Mila Feat. Uwe Worlitzer - Teil Von Mir 19:32 Junge, Junge Feat. Jamie Hartma - Wicked Hearts 19:28 Lenny Ibizarre - Pretty As You Feel 19:24 Nora En Pure - Dry Sobbing 19:21 Gibbs - Waiting For Lonely 19:18 Tainted Youth Feat. Lucinda - Teardrops 19:15 Purple Disco Machine - Hypnotized 19:12 Calvin Harris Feat. Sam Smith - Promises 19:07 Scotty & Wilcox - Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (Wilcox Extended) 19:04 Consoul Trainin Feat. Steven Aderinto & Duoviolins - Obsession 18:58 Milan Euringer And Tube & Berger - Lovebreak 18:54 Trinix - Vision Deluxe 18:52 Mellowdy - Rise Up 18:47 Moca - Kleine Träumerei 18:44 Edx & Amba Shepherd - Off The Grid 18:41 Vize & Leony - Dolly Song (Devil's Cup) 18:37 Sise - The Rain (Where Do I Begin) 18:33 Kyla La Grange - Cut Your Teeth 18:27 Dale Anderson Feat. Anil Chawla - Pimento Grove 18:23 Chubbanak Club - Candysnow 18:20 Mount & Emdey - Venus 18:15 Loopaland - Born To Be Alive 18:12 Majestic & Boney M. - Rasputin 18:09 Hypnosis - Pulstar 18:03 Chicane - Offshore 17:58 Elderbrook & Bob Moses - Inner Light 17:56 The Holy Santa Barbara Feat. Madugo - The Sailor Song 17:49 Adana Twins - Strange 17:45 Mandala Dreams - Mirror Lake 17:42 Sans Souci - Nanda 17:36 Sunlounger & Zara - Lost (Chillout) 17:33 Topic, Robin Schulz, Nico Santos, Paul Van Dyk - In Your Arms (For An Angel) 17:30 Lucy Neville - Ransom 17:24 4 Wing - Penelope 17:21 Loud Luxury And Frank Walker Feat. Stephen Puth - Like Gold 17:15 Esteban Garcia - Para Mi 17:12 Blank & Jones Feat. Coralie Clément - Cest Mieux 17:09 Glockenbach Ft. Clockclock - Brooklyn 17:06 Calvin Harris & Disciples - How Deep Is Your Love 17:02 Alex Breitling - Lilie 16:53 Christopher Von Deylen - Heaven Can Wait 16:49 Spanish Armada Movement - Margarita 16:46 Jeremy Loops - Til I Found You 16:42 Cats On Bricks Feat. Zach Alwin - Planes Over Ushuaia 16:38 Vintage Culture And Rooftime - I Will Find 16:36 Feder & Ofenbach Feat. Dawty Music - Call Me Papi 16:34 Colorblast - Message In A Bottle (Colorblast Version) 16:30 Blank & Jones - Grown Minds 16:28 Digital Camel - Shine Bright 16:23 Boozoo Bajou Feat. Wayne Martin - Moanin' 16:15 Miyagi, Sascha Braemer, Dan Caster, Jan Blomqvist - Woodpeckers Love Affair 16:08 Monolink - Don't Hold Back 16:02 Fous De La Mer - Vue Sur La Mer 15:59 Backstreet Boys - Chances (Instrumental) 15:53 Nora En Pure - Thermal (Extended Mix) 15:49 Oovee Feat. Alesha Dixon - Higher Love 15:41 Blond:ish Feat. Bahramji - Omnipresent 15:37 Alina Baraz & Galimatias - Fantasy (Felix Jaehn Remix) 15:34 Nightmares On Wax - Passion 15:31 Lizot - Daddy Cool 15:28 Filous - Let It Snow (Original Mix) 15:23 Sphere - I Fly Away 15:16 Soul Button - Circadian Rhythm (Hraach Remix) 15:13 Melosense - Polarization (Original Mix) 15:10 Lost Frequencies X James Arthur - Questions 15:08 Twisted Harmonies Feat. Mougleta - You & Me 15:04 Alle Farben - Berlin 15:01 Kush Kush & Sickmellow Feat. Kazhi - Blacklight 14:59 Atb & Topic - Your Love (9pm) 14:53 Oliver Koletzki - A Tribe Called Kotori 14:50 Felix Jaehn Feat. Zoe Wees - Do It Better 14:47 Sunnery James & Ryan Marciano - Let It Lie 14:44 Mark Brown - The Journey Continues (Acoustic Version) 14:41 Alle Farben & Fools Garden - Lemon Tree 14:38 Hbz, Anna Grey & Agent Zed - Aloha Hey 14:35 Drenchill Ft. Indiiana - Hey Hey 14:29 Goa Foundation - (I Just) Died In Your Arms Tonight 14:25 Mind Against, Dyzen - Freedom 14:22 Sam Feldt & Sam Fischer - Pick Me Up (Vavo Remix) 14:18 Ac Venture - Rain In Spain (Roberto Sol Remix) 14:11 Desert Dwellers - Union 14:03 Maxim Lany - Riding The Wave (Extended Mix) 14:00 R3hab & Marnik - Candyman 13:54 Sherrie Lea - No Ordinary Love (Arnold T Chill Mix) 13:52 Meduza Feat. Goodboys - Piece Of Your Heart 13:48 Eli & Fur - Come Back Around 13:45 Dimitri Vegas & Like Mike Vs. Diplo Feat. Deb's Daughter - Hey Baby 13:42 Klingande & Bright Sparks - Messiah 13:37 Tinlicker Feat. Roos Jonker - Come Back Home 13:33 Feder Feat. Emmi - Blind 13:30 Blank & Jones - Swept Away 13:26 Patchy - Friend (Original Mix) 13:23 Clément Leroux - Memories 13:20 Dante Klein & Jordiz Feat. Megan Brands - Life 13:17 I Will, I Swear - Long Days 13:13 Nihoni - After Sun 13:10 Shouse - Won't Forget You 13:06 Karen Gibson Roc - Painted Room 13:03 Emily Burns - Im So Happy 13:00 Hanns Feat. Lu - Chemistry 12:56 The Chainsmokers & Coldplay - Something Just Like This 12:53 Winona Oak & Robin Schulz - Oxygen 12:48 Lstn - Times Of Sorrow 12:44 Kungs Feat. R I T U A L - You Remain 12:41 Nora En Pure - Fibonacci 12:37 Lemongrass - Habla Mi Corazon 12:35 Mount & Illian - Fool 12:29 Pete Tong & Tale Of Us Feat. Jules Buckley - Time 12:22 Hansi Lang - Perfect Day (Smacs & Patrick Kong Remix) 12:15 Beyhude - Akasha 12:12 Together Alone - Ain't Nobody 12:08 James Bright - Siempre 12:03 Schiller - Free The Dragon 11:56 Armen Miran & Hraach - Gravitation 11:52 Shaun Feat. Conor Maynard - Way Back Home 11:49 Nora Van Elken - Mount Fuji 11:46 Lucy Neville - Shameless 11:39 Oxia - Harmonie 11:36 Blank & Jones - Coastline 11:32 Alan Walker & Gavin James - Tired (Kygo Remix) 11:27 Fous De La Mer - Luces 11:20 Nora En Pure - Oblivion (Extended Mix) 11:14 Mollono.bass, Ava Asante - Feeling Good 11:11 Agatino Romero - I'm Feeling For You 11:05 Beyhude - Rüzgar 11:02 Calvin Harris Feat. Sam Smith - Promises 10:59 Topic Feat. Nico Santos) - Home (Alle Farben Remix) 10:54 Tinlicker Feat. Nathan Nicholson - Always Will 10:48 Faro - Shape Of Sense 10:44 Robin Schulz & Alle Farben & Israel Kamakawiwo'ole - Somewhere Over The Rainbow / What A Wonderful World 10:41 Tinlicker & Helsloot - Because You Move Me 10:38 Iberis Eguana - Sand Of Time 10:34 Ambyion - Motion 10:30 Armin Van Buuren, System F - Exhale (Tim Besamusca's Lounge Mix) 10:24 Blank & Jones - Coh 10:21 The Alan Parsons Project - The Turn Of A Friendly Card 10:17 Air - Playground Love 10:11 Bay Area - Dolphin Rider (Pianodreamsession) 10:07 Schiller - Summer In Berlin 10:03 Esteban Garcia Junior - Deep Blue 10:00 Sono - Keep Control (Artbat Remix Edit) 09:57 Ofenbach & Ella Henderson - Hurricane 09:52 Lizot Feat. Jason Anousheh - Einfach Nur Weg (Blondee & Roberto Mozza Remix) 09:49 Viva La Panda & Finding Molly - Bring It On (La La La) 09:45 Tinlicker Feat. Nathan Nicholson - Be Here And Now 09:40 Owen Ear, Stereoteric - Screaming Heart (Original Mix) 09:37 L'imperatrice - Peur Des Filles (Montmartre Remix) 09:33 Dead Composers - Starlight 09:31 Alan Walker X Hans Zimmer - Time (Alan Walker Remix) 09:28 Edx - Ecletric (Mixed) 09:22 Thievery Corporation - The Glass Bead Game 09:19 Loud Luxury Feat. Morgan St. Jean - Aftertaste 09:15 Lstn - Undecided 09:09 Schiller - The Future Iii 09:07 Trinix & Ian Urbina - Bad Things 09:04 Steve Forest, Te Pai - Never Gonna Give You Up 09:00 Ivy - Edge Of The Ocean 08:55 Lyke - Stay With Me 08:48 Atb - No Fate 08:45 Sam Feldt X Lush & Simon Feat. Inna - Fade Away 08:39 Hraach & Armen Miran - Nowhere 08:35 Ashcome - Vitamin Sky (Original Mix) 08:32 Together Alone - Let Go 08:29 Lost Frequencies, Zonderling & Kelvin Jones - Love To Go 08:26 Madison Park, Beechkraft - Parts Of Me (Original Mix) 08:23 Nora Van Elken - Interstellar 08:16 John Kah - Carina (Enui Remix) 08:12 Burak Yeter Feat. Danelle Sandova - Tuesday 08:07 Dreamerproject - Horizons (Glenn Main Remix) 08:02 Kid Massive, Yuji Ono, Dtale - Pray (Wolf Krew Remix) 07:59 Bedouin Soundclash - Brutal Hearts (Flicflac ) 07:54 Christopher Von Deylen - Infinity 07:47 Hraach - After Dark 07:41 Hraach, Armen Miran - Aldebaran (Original) 07:38 Milk & Sugar Feat. John Paul Young - Love Is In The Air 07:33 Lemongrass - Angel Wings 07:28 Sans Souci - Venice 07:24 Sono - Trusting You 07:21 Paco Pedilla - Chariots Of Fire (Glorious Remix) 07:15 Tebra - Suton 07:10 Bolier & Leandro Da Silva - Floripa (Extended) 07:07 Bebo Best & The Super Lounge Orchestr - Come As You Are 07:04 Bernward Koch - Lonely Dream (Solo Piano) 07:01 Tiësto & Karol G - Don't Be Shy 06:57 Mahmut Orhan & Colonel Bagshot - 6 Days 06:53 Fritz Kalkbrenner - Good Things 06:51 George Geccoo Feat. Maik Pinto - Dolce Vita 06:47 Moby - Lie Down In Darkness 06:43 Christopher Von Deylen - Heliotrope 06:36 Lexer & Paji - Red Puddle 06:32 Blank & Jones - High Fly 06:28 Nora En Pure - Enchantment 06:23 In Credo - Siesta Del Sol 06:20 Dj Antoine & Deep Vice - When You Want Some Love (Dj Antoine Vs Mad Mark 2k21 Mix) 06:17 Daniel Portman - Sensual Desires 06:13 Rithma - The Return 06:08 Röyksopp Feat. Susanne Sundfør - If You Want Me 06:04 Pascal Letoublon - Feelings Undercover 06:01 Lenny Ibizarre - The Rain 05:58 Mike Candys & Séb Mont - What's On Your Mind 05:55 Alok Feat. John Martin - Wherever You Go 05:47 Edx - We Can't Give Up 05:44 Kygo With Avicii & Sandro Cavazza - Forever Yours (Tribute) 05:39 Moby - The Sky Is Broken 05:31 Garlington - Falling To Pieces (Extended Mix) 05:24 Blank & Jones - White Light 05:21 Wamdue Project - King Of My Castle 05:19 Luca Schreiner Feat. Johnny Chicago - Its All Gonna Be Good (Junge Junge Edit) 05:12 Valeron - Jamal 05:08 Tania Zygar, Sofia Zlatko, Vijay - Wildest Dreams (Extended Mix) 05:05 Deepend & Graham Candy - Belong (Deepend Edit) 04:59 Anrey - The Forgotten (Extended Mix) 04:54 Jonson - S.c.e.n.e. T.w.o. 04:50 Paul Oakenfold, Bolier, Luis Fonsi - The World Can Wait (Bolier Remix) 04:48 Srtw & Mave Feat. Sønlille - Last Train Home 04:42 Mathieu & Florzinho - Maha - Amba 04:39 Edx - Vommuli 04:35 Sam Feldt - Show Me Love (Original Mix) 04:27 Jan Blomqvist - Empty Floor 04:24 Lika Morgan - Ding Dong 04:21 Starley - Lovers Strangers 04:19 Dj Antoine Feat. Ablai - My Corazon (Dj Antoine Vs Mad Mark 2k21 Mix) 04:14 Mr.da-nos - San Francisco 2k20 04:10 Felix Jaehn Feat. Lost Frequencies & Linying - Eagle Eyes 04:07 Neptune & Moonnight - I Need A New Love (Original Mix) 04:04 Armin Van Buuren Feat. Rbvln - Weight Of The World (Feat. Rbvln) 03:58 Estelle Feat. Kanye West - American Boy (Lost Frequencies Remix) 03:56 Dj Antoine & Flip Capella Feat. Evelyn - Dark Love 03:50 Goldfish - Love Everlasting (Extended Mix) 03:44 Fac15 & Jay C - By The Pool (Jay C's Classic Mix) 03:41 Nora Van Elken - Okinawa 03:37 Nora En Pure - Sphinx 03:33 Joachim Pastor Feat. Nathan Nicholson - Saint Louis 03:28 Anrey - Lost Lands (Extended Mix) 03:24 Blank & Jones With Jan Loechel - Secret Hideaway 03:22 Famba Feat. Brando & Mkla - Games We Play 03:18 Blank & Jones - Alone In This Rhythm 03:15 Klingande & Krishane - Rebel Yell 03:12 Trinix - Soweto 03:08 Schiller & Peter Heppner - Leben... I Feel You 03:03 Boozoo Bajou - Caminoux 02:57 Twocolors - Together 02:51 Shakedown - At Night (Afterlife Remix) 02:47 Fritz Kalkbrenner - Void 02:44 Nora En Pure & Lika Morgan - In The Air Tonight (Sons Of Maria Remix) 02:39 Velvet Lounge Project - In Harmony 02:35 Nora En Pure - Tantrum 02:32 Eelke Kleijn - Midnight Affair (Samaha Slow Edit) 02:25 Chris Zippel Feat. Tusnelda - Blade 02:22 Vamero & Lizot - Bleeding Love 02:19 Armin Van Buuren & Avira - Illusion (Mixed) 02:13 Blank & Jones - Give It To Me 02:10 Klingande, Wrabel - Big Love 02:07 Avaion X Vize X Leony - Pieces 02:03 Depeche Mode - Goodnight Lovers 01:59 Kidsø - Fir 01:57 Buchs Feat. Nokyo - Cheverolet 01:52 Airstream One - Southern Light 01:49 Neptunica & Lunax - We Don't Even Talk Anymore 01:43 Max Denoise Feat Claire Willis - Bring To Me Life (Original Mix) 01:38 Faithless Feat. Nathan Ball & Caleb Femi - I Need Someone 01:34 Klangkarussel & Poppy Baskcomb - This Love 01:28 Moby - A Case For Shame 01:23 Deep Dive Corp. Feat. Dennis Le Gree - Water 01:20 Atb & Topic - Your Love (9pm) 01:15 Soho Lounge Feat. Dea Li - Chiaro Di Luna 01:11 Blank & Jones - Twilight Moon 01:07 Lstn - Sïstër 01:03 Thor - Chamka 00:58 Klangperlenspiel - Million Words 00:54 Schiller - White Nights (Don't Let Me Go) 00:49 Nora En Pure - Diving With Whales (Daniel Portman Radio Mix) 00:46 Yves V X Bashkar - Halfway (Feat. Twan Ray) 00:38 Boris Pillmann - Love You 00:32 Banderas - This Is Your Life (Easy Life Mix) 00:30 Nathan Evans - Wellerman (220 Kid X Billen Ted Remix) 00:25 Schiller Mit Moya Brennan - Falling 00:21 Daniel Portman - Vulnerable 00:19 Nora Van Elken - Heaven Is A Place On Earth 00:14 Billy Sizemore - Together 00:11 Sons Of Maria - Always 00:07 Mike Candys & Jack Holiday - Saltwater (Rework) 00:02 Faro - Dreaming In Orange

[openheartfanfics]

Meet OPH MCs: Ethan Ramsey

Ethan x F!MC (A - N)

Dr. Adelaide Nicholson - @dr-addieramsey

Meet MC

Dr. Adelina Nari Lee - @openheartforeverinmyheart

Meet MC

Dr. Alexandria Karlynn Lee (李嘉靈）- @cryomyst

Meet MC  |  The Past  |  The Present |  The Future

Dr. Amelia Catharina Wright - @blossomanarchy

Meet MC  |  The Past  |  The Present

Anastasia Audhild - @luvsyana

Meet MC

Dr. Angel Martin - @rookiemartin

Meet MC

Dr. Aspen Mila Kallie - @zealouscanonindeer

Meet MC | The Past - 1 | The Past - 2 | OC Children

Dr. Casey Valentine - @crazy-loca-blog

Meet MC  |  The Past  |  The Present  |  The Future  | OC Sibling

Dr. Casey Mara Valentine - @coffeeheartaddict2

Meet MC

Dr. Casey Hollyn Valentine - @hopelessromantic1352

Meet MC

Dr. Cass Smith - @custaroonie

Meet MC

Dr. Cassie Valentine - @liaromancewriter

Meet MC  |  The Past  |  The Present  |  The Future

OC Sibling

Dr. Catherine Jane Valentine - @amortentiaopenheart

Meet MC

Dr. Celia Moore - @trappedinfanfiction

Meet MC  | The Past  |  The Present  |  The Future

OC Brother  

Dr. Celia Jade Valentine - @lem-20

Meet MC  |   The Past  |  The Present

Dr. Chiara Ray - @terrm9

Meet MC

Dr. Claire Grace Evans - @tveitertotwrites

Meet MC | OC Children

Dr. Diana Torsha Ramirez - @gryffindordaughterofathena

Meet MC | The Past  |  The Present |  The Future 1, 2

Relationship Stats

Dr. Ellie Madeline Shepherd - @storyofmychoices

Meet MC

Dr. Eiselee Elise Blake - @quixoticdreamer16

Meet MC

Dr. Eve Valentine - @starrystarrytrouble

Meet MC

Dr. Evelyn Long - @starryeyedrookie

Meet MC   |   The Past

Dr. Genevieve Rose McClure - @genevievemd

Meet MC  |  The Present  |  The Past

Dr. Haley Jane Rochester - @parisa-kh

Meet MC

Dr. Jane Fletcher - @inlocusmads

Meet MC

Dr. Jill Valentine - @danijimenezv

Meet MC  |  The Past  |  The Present

Relationship Stats

OC Kids & Pets

Dr Josephine (Josie) Kingsley - @josiesopenheart

Meet MC  |  The Past  |   The Present  |  The Future

Dr. Kaycee C. MacClennan - @jerzwriter

Meet MC  |  The Past  |  The Present  |  The Future

Dr.  Klaudia Helena Craig - @theinvisibledreamergirl

Meet MC

Dr. Leah García - @drethanramslay

Meet MC

Dr.  Li Hui Yin (李徽因) - @beastlyinstrument

Meet MC

Dr. Lilac Allende - @jamespotterthefirst

Meet MC | The Past  |  The Present  |  The Future

OC Children

Dr. Luz Beltrán - @takemyopenheart

Meet MC  |  The Past  |  The Present

OC Children

Maddie Diaz - @beebubbly

Meet MC  |  The Past

Dr. Marchia Ivy Bisognin - @a-crepusculo

Meet MC

Dr. Meera Bose - @headoverheelsforramsey

Meet MC

Dr. Naomi Valentine - @heauxplesslydevoted

Meet MC  |  The Past

Dr. Natalie Cusack - @bex-la-get

Meet MC | The Past  |  The Present  |  The Future

OC Siblings/Friends

_

[audrinahq]

AUDRINA CHOI from GLENDALE UNIVERSITY! the TWENTY FOUR year old JENNIE KIM lookalike is most known for being SELF ASSURED and GENEROUS. but they can also be ARROGANT and CALLOUS. the GENDERQUEER always reminds me of JUMPING FENCES TO GET AWAY, VODKA IN A WATERBOTTLE, AN OLD LEATHER JACKET TAKEN FROM YOUR MOM'S CLOSET. that’s probably why they currently have CANDY BY MGK on repeat. with THEM around, this school year is bound to be interesting.

♡     ───   basics

full name: audrina choi nicknake(s): audrey, rina age: twenty four birthday: january ninth sexual orientation: [redacted] relationship status: unknown, assumed single occupation: heiress, student, model

♡     ───   background

place of birth: seoul, south korea hometown: upper east side, manhattan, new york education: graduated from constance billard school for girls, currently attending glendale university

♡     ───   physical

faceclaim: jennie kim eye color: dark brown hair color: black height: 5′1 

♡     ───   relatives

biological parents: choi myung-dae (father) & choi chi-yon (mother) adoptive guardians: viktor trimme & anika kuhn siblings: none, only child pets: casper, an orange cat & bandit, a german shepherd

♡     ───   biography / personality

when it comes to audrina’s adoption and their parents, there is no scandal- much to the disapintment of new york city. instead of being raised in south korea, audrina’s birth parents made the decision to give them up for adoption. it was an open adoption and audrina grew up with their birth parents as close family friends and their guardians, viktor and anika. viktor and anika were unable to have biological children of their own and after adopting audrina, they started a foundation meant to help in the adoption process for parents struggling. 

it’s not as if audrina is hiding their sexuality. yhey just love having that part of their life hidden from the media and prying eyes. very careful not to be spotted, audrina has become the master at hiding their personal life from not only page 6 but gossip girl as well. it’s become a big speculation if they’re dating anyone at all and who is might be. anyone spotted with them is subject to the “are they dating” questions before it’s clear that whomever it is, is not audrina’s partner. 

audrina is the person you want with you when things get complicated. they have a knack for either talking their way out of anything and when words don’t work, money sure does. most of the time the reason someone is in trouble is audrina’s fault but they don’t leave a friend behind. they do, however, leave pawns behind. “pawns are meant to be sacrificed for the queen to win.” high school it was clear they thought themself the queen bee of constance billard. it seems in college that mentality hasn’t died away but no longer are they making it known they want to be on top. not as obvious, at least.

audrina is a very “love them and leave them” type of person. commitment is a nasty word when it comes to relationships. rumor has it their best friend has a reward for the first person to get them to say ‘i love you’. 

♡     ───   in character questionnaire 

Parents names and occupations? Are they still together? Still alive?

“which set of parents are you talking about? myung-dae and chi-yon are owners of a ramyeon shop in korea. viktor is a criminal defense attorney and anika is a plastic surgeon. they’re all still alive.”

Where did you grow up?

“in the upper east side. manhattan. fifth avenue, to be specific.” 

Relationship Status?

“wouldn’t you like to know? next question.”

What is your major?

“education. and no, i don’t want to be a teacher but i need a background in education so i can sit on school boards and reform the education system.”

Sexuality? 

“you won’t get that answer from me. stop trying.”

Do you have a job?

“what? being a student isn’t good enough? i do some modelling as a hobby. i don’t need to work.”

Do you dorm at school? Have an apartment?

“i live in the same apartment i always have. i lived in the dorms for freshman year- it was required, and then moved out the second i could. community living isn’t for me.”

Hobbies?

“aside from modeling, i like reading. i’m into fashion- what upper east side kid isnt? oh- dancing and art too. recently took up taekwondo.”

If you had a warning label, what would yours say?

“tiny but mighty? no. uh- probably something to do with how i would kick your ass. i don’t know, i’m not that clever.”

What have you been up to over the summer?

“you know that better than i do. seem like a gossip girl reader. ask her, sure she knows.”

Last image taken on your cell phone?

Last text you received?

“next question.”

Where were you the night the fight broke out?

“korea, i was working.”

♡     ───   character inspirations 

blair waldorf

jenny humphrey

narcissa malfoy

harley quinn

ingui "queen" yoon

klaus mikaelson

caroline forbes

rebekah mikaelson

♡     ───   wanted connections

sex money feelings dies ( open ) - think of exes but make it a one night stand but on top of that a frequent hook up. every time you say that won’t hook up with each other again. it’s not healthy, you both want past the relationship and let it go, but the moment y’all see each other from across the bar or at a party you just know you’ll end up in each other’s bed again

i saw you in a dream ( nadine alston ) - you guys were close. so close. thought there would never be a time you guys wouldn’t talk, but one thing lead to another and you’re left thinking about them when it’s just you and your thoughts. without them your life really hasn’t been the same, but is it worth getting past what happened to pick up the phone and call them?

painkiller ( juliana “jules” santos ) - best friends forever. literally. this person knows you inside out and you can’t see a day without them. they’re essentially your painkiller. you tell them everything and them back to you. they can tell if you’re feeling down just by the way you send your snapchat streaks that morning. you can’t see a day without them.

call your girlfriend ( open ) - this one is pretty messy. your muse is in a relationship, but there’s a huge flirtationship between these two. the flirtationship essentially becomes to both of these people attached to each other and maybe... even in love. but there’s still that relationship that’s in the way... YIKES

perfect places ( noah evans ) - party buddies but make it you guys just getting lost in the vibes because you don’t want to deal with life. it’s a good friendship. you guys get the thoughts in your head to go numb, but at a point it’s like what’s the point ?

femme fatale ( jared callahan ) - one muse is a huge fool for the other. they’re head over heels for them but they’re just playing around with the other’s feelings because hey ! it’s fun ! all of their friends tell them to ‘ just leave it you’re gonna get hurt ’, but they just continue to be boo boo the fool 

ex affair ( open ) - basically your muse was the cheater and audrina the other woman but it ended for whatever reason.

family friends ( luca cartwright ) - friends who met through family, could either be close or it be an awkward situation because they don't really get along or know each other well.

squad goals ( tatiana “tati” reyes , juliana “jules” santos , open ) - just a close knit group of friends. the group chat is always going off with someone’s dramatics, one or more of the squad constantly featured together in social media and the press. one or more or all of them constantly sleeping over at audrina’s place. doesn’t matter the university, these friends have been ride or die since childhood at least.

♡     ───   wanted connections

these can be used in any direction the “you” does not mean your muse from the point of view from audrina, it can go either direction. i just like the #aesthetic of writing it this way. 

001. open. you pulled away from me, so i pulled away from you. i pulled away when you hurt me. you pulled away when the world hurt you. and now we are both pulled away during a time when we are supposed to be pulled together. at some point i needed to put it all behind me. forget about you. forget about the way you made me wonder. and what we could have been. because it never happened, and it always got later, morning always turned into nights and the day was eventually over and nothing had changed. but it doesn’t mean that i don’t feel a damn thing, i do still feel a hole in my heart when they talk about you, i do still want to scream when i hear you have another life with someone else, i do still want to feel your kiss on my skin. and i do still love you.

002. open. we have no idea what personal boundaries are and yeah we’ve made out before a lot and yeah it was ok but we’re friends ok friends and why are you staring at me like that? why are you holding my hand always? why are you telling me how much you adore me? oh we’re not dating? oh you’ve been in love with me for years and i’m a doorknob and now things are awkward and i don’t know what to do to fix it.

003. open. i confessed i might be in love with and you said you weren’t interested in dating me because we’re just friends and i’m getting over that heartbreak but you show up on my doorstep and kiss me and we end up in bed and in the morning you tell me this was a mistake and before i can stop you, you leave. you show up again. lather rinse repeat. it’s not good for either of us but we keep doing it.

004. open. we tried the whole dating thing and it didn’t work out and we’ve moved beyond that. you’re my go-to friend on anything and everything and any problem you got i will fucking mow down hell to fix. wow your smile just lights up my world and please don’t be sad. who made you sad i will throw them in hell and mow them down and – oh wow. i never got over you. you’re my fucking world and i just want you to be happy but you can only see me as a friend because when you look at me you see our failed relationship but i’m not the same person i swear.

005. open. we’ve been best friends since we were kids, grew up next to each other and even though we aren’t from the same family we get confused for siblings a lot when we were younger. we’re older now and people keep thinking we’re dating but it’s not like that, we’re just extremely close. oh hey, you’re at my house more often than your own cause i don’t like to be alone at night and the neighbors think we’re together or having an affair and it’s funny to laugh about at dinners and we always get each other valentine’s presents since we were kids and you’re the first person i call when anything happens in my life. what? no, i’m not in love with them, they’re just my best friend.

006. open. “hey, open your front door. i’m here with chips, pizza, ice cream, and your favorite pastries. yes, i know it’s like 3am but i’m your best friend and i know you’re sad right now and i am here to comfort you.”

007. open. you’re not my ex anything. you were a passing moment, an almost a maybe one day we’ll be something but one day never came, you passed by and ‘almost’ didn’t happen. and yet it feels like something did because i know your favorite songs, what you think about late at night and how beautiful you thought i was. and i know you knew even more about me. our story was like an acute angle, a meeting point and then off in different directions. so close and then farther and farther away. we were an almost, maybe, someday.

008. open. tell me where we went wrong because it’s still not clear to me. there are still questions left unanswered and they’re killing me. tell me why we end up here, i thought we’d last a little bit longer. tell me what happened, why all of a sudden you decided to live without me. you just left. tell me how far should i walk away from you because i can’t turn away on my own. i’ve tried my best to let go but my life keeps coming back to you. i’ve tried to walk alone but i keep on looking back, hoping that every time that i turn, you’re there walking with me. tell me when to stop loving you because i don’t know how to stop this feeling.

009. open. if you’re alone, i’ll be your shadow. if you want to cry, i’ll be your shoulder. if you want a hug, i’ll be your pillow. if you need to be happy, i’ll be your smile… but anytime you need a friend, i’ll just be me.

010. open. things were great for a while before suddenly they weren’t. commitment doesn’t look good on you or me and now everything ends in a fight. you pushed me away so i pushed you away harder, the distance became catastrophic and the relationship imploded. hearts were shattered in the process and now you just bring back too many memories of what it felt like to be happy and to be in love so i just ignore you cause it feels easier than facing the truth that i miss you.

[mightystargazer]

Readinglist 2020

Another year gone, another (audio)booklist completed! Not as many as past years, but that´s because I watched a lot of series instead.

Here goes!

Stephen Leather The House on Gable Street

Scott Sigler Pandemic

Jennifer McMahon The Invited

Robert R. McCammon Swan Song

Peter James The House on Cold Hill

Michael McBride Subterrestrial

Karl Beecher Interstellar Caveman

Flint Maxwell Dead Haven

Flint Maxwell Dead Hope

Flint Maxwell Dead Nation

Flint Maxwell Dead Coast

Flint Maxwell Dead End

Andrzej Sapkowski The Last Wish

Andrzej Sapkowski Season of Storms

Andrzej Sapkowski Sword of Destiny

Andrzej Sapkowski Blood of Elves

Andrzej Sapkowski Time of Contempt

Andrzej Sapkowski Baptism of Fire

Andrzej Sapkowski The Tower of the Swallow

Andrzej Sapkowski Lady of the Lake

Nicholas Sansbury Smith Extinction Ashes

Jonathan Maberry Rage

T.W. Piperbrook The Reckoning

T.W. Piperbrook The Change

Jeremy Robinson Infinite

Bobby Akart The Shift

Bobby Akart The Pulse

Bobby Akart The Collapse

Chuck Dixon Blooded

Eoin Colfer Highfire

India Hill Brown The Forgotten Girl

Jeff Strand Cyclops Road

Kevin Hearne First Dangle and Other Stories

Douglas Preston Gideon’s Sword

Douglas Preston Gideon’s Corpse

Douglas Preston The Lost Island

Douglas Preston Beyond the Ice Limit

Douglas Preston The Ice Limit

Douglas Preston The Pharaoh Key

Adrienne Lecter Uprising

Adrienne Lecter Retribution

David Morrell Creepers

David Morrell Scavenger

Greig Beck The Void

Greig Beck From Hell

Peter Clines Terminus

James Herbert Moon

Damian Dibben Tomorrow

Dean Koontz Ricochet Joe

Jack Hunt As We Fall

James Herbert The Dark

Jeremy Robinson Tribe

Michael McBride Subhuman

Michael McBride Forsaken

Mark Tufo Asabron

Dean Koontz 77 Shadow Street

George Hill Uprising USA

J R Grey Supervillainy and Other Poor Career Choices

Simone St. James The Sun Down Motel

Mike Evans Origins

Mike Evans Surviving the Turned

Mike Evans Strangers

Mike Evans White Lie

Mike Evans Civil War

Mike Evans Divided

Mike Evans Flight

Keith C. Blackmore Make Me King, Mountain Man

Dean Koontz Darkness Under the Sun

Craig DiLouie One Of Us

Mira Grant Alien Echo

Ambrose Ibsen The Splendor of Fear

Daniel Kraus Bent Heavens

Dean Koontz Watchers

Jack Townsend Tales from the Gas Station 2

Jeff Strand Dead Clown Barbecue

Patrick F. McManus Strange Encounters of the Bird Kind

Scott Cawthon The Silver Eyes

Scott Cawthon The Twisted Ones

Scott Cawthon The Fourth Closet

Eoin Colfer The Fowl Twins

Richard Laymon The Traveling Vampire Show

Peter Meredith The Queen Unthroned

Peter Meredith The Queen Enslaved

Peter Meredith The Queen Unchained

Luke Duffy When There's No More Room in Hell

Larry Levin Oogy

Joseph  Duncan The Oldest Living Vampire

Joseph  Duncan The Oldest Living Vampire on the Prowl

Jeff Strand Sick House

Douglas Adams Dirk Gentlys Holistic Detective Agency

Patrick F. McManus Mosquito Bay

Clive Barker Mister B Gone

Jeremy Robinson Tether

James Herbert The Survivor

Douglas Preston & Lincoln Child Thunderhead

Darcy Coates The Carrow Haunt

Adam Nevill The Ritual

Ben Kissel The Last Book on the Left

Craig Robertson The Galaxy According to Giddeon

Kc Wayland We're Alive season 1

Kc Wayland We're Alive season 2

Kc Wayland We're Alive season 3

Kc Wayland We're Alive season 4

Stephen King If It Bleeds

Patric F McManus Scritch's Creek

Luke Duffy The Dead Walk

Jeff VanderMeer Annihilation

Jeff VanderMeer Authority

Jeff VanderMeer Acceptance

Adrian Tchaikovsky The Expert System's Brother

Amanda M. Lee Freaky Days

Amanda M. Lee Freaky Lies

Amanda M. Lee Freaky Hearts

Amanda M. Lee Freaky Games

Amanda M. Lee Freaky Places

Amanda M. Lee Freaky Reapers

Amanda M. Lee Freaky Rites

Amanda M. Lee Freaky Witches

Amanda M. Lee Freaky Fangs

André Alexis Fifteen Dogs

Cherie Priest The Family Plot

Danielle Trussoni The Ancestor

Michael McBride Burial Ground

Mary Roach Stiff

Dean Koontz Devoted

Grady Hendrix The Southern Book Club's Guide to Slaying Vampires

James Herbert The Jonah

Mark Tufo Bitfrost

Robert Bevan 7d6

Scott Carson The Chill

Ambrose Ibsen Beyond

Creepypasta Creepypasta storytime

Darcy Coates Craven Manor

Greg F. Gifune Children of Chaos

Joe Hill Full Throttle

Jonathan Janz Exorcist Falls

Linda S. Godfrey Monsters Among Us

Michael Bray Something in the Dark

Terry Pratchett The Colour of Magic

Terry Pratchett Light Fantastic

Terry Pratchett Equal Rites

Terry Pratchett Mort

Terry Pratchett Sourcery

Terry Pratchett Wyrd Sisters

Terry Pratchett Pyramids

Terry Pratchett Guards Guards

Terry Pratchett Eric

Terry Pratchett Moving Pictures

Terry Pratchett Reaper Man

Terry Pratchett Witches Abroad

Terry Pratchett Small Gods

Terry Pratchett Lords and Ladies

Terry Pratchett Men at Arms

Terry Pratchett Soul Music

Terry Pratchett Intreresting Times

Dean Koontz Breathless

Terry Pratchett Maskerade

Terry Pratchett Feet of Clay

Terry Pratchett Hogfather

Terry Pratchett Jingo

Terry Pratchett The Last Continent

Dean Koontz By the Light Of the Moon

Terry Pratchett Carpe Jugulum

Terry Pratchett The Fifth Elephant

Terry Pratchett The Truth

Terry Pratchett Thief of Time

Terry Pratchett The Last Hero

Dean Koontz After the Last Race

Adrienne Lecter Green Fields Book 12

Dean Koontz Chase

Terry Pratchett The Amazing Maurice

Terry Pratchett Night Watch

Terry Pratchett The Wee Free Men

Terry Pratchett Monstrous Regiment

Terry Pratchett A Hat Full of Sky

Terry Pratchett Going Postal

Terry Pratchett Thud

Terry Pratchett Wintersmith

Terry Pratchett Making Money

Terry Pratchett Unseen Academicals

Terry Pratchett I Shall Wear Midnight

Terry Pratchett Snuff

Terry Pratchett Raising Steam

Terry Pratchett The Shepherds Crown

Dean Koontz Shattered

Terry Pratchett Mrs Bradshaws Handbook

Terry Pratchett The Folklore of Discworld

Terry Pratchett The Science of Discworld I

Terry Pratchett The Science of Discworld II

Terry Pratchett The Science of Discworld III

Terry Pratchett The Science of Discworld IV

Dean Koontz Darkfall

Mark Tufo Hvergelmir

Stephen R. George Nightscape

Alan Dean Foster To the Vanishing Point

Barry J. Hutchison A Lot of Weird Space Shizz

Drew Hayes The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales

Drew Hayes Undeath and Taxes

Drew Hayes Bloody Acquisitions

Drew Hayes The Fangs of Freelance Fred

Drew Hayes Deadly Assessments

Drew Hayes Undeasding Bells Fred

Guillermo del Toro Blackwood Tapes 01

Mark Tufo The Bleed

David Haynes Dead Crow

Alex North The Shadows

Adam Nevill Apartment 16

David Gerrold Hella

DC Alden UFO Down

Rachel Aukes 100 Days in Deadland

Rachel Aukes Deadland's Harvest

Rachel Aukes Deadland Rising

Dean Koontz Nightmare Journey

Mark Tufo The Trembling Path

Drew Hayes Underqualified Advice

Tim Lebbon Eden

Eden

Jeff Strand Wolf Hunt 1

Jeff Strand Wolf Hunt 2

Jeff Strand Wolf Hunt 3

L.G. Estrella Two Necromancers, a Bureaucrat, and an Army of Golems

Rick Gualtieri Strange Days

Rick Gualtieri Everyday Horrors

Jeff VanderMeer A Peculiar Peril

Dean Koontz The Taking

John Connolly A Book of Bones

John Connolly The Dirty South

Neil Gaiman The Sandman

Greig Beck The Siberian Incident

Robert A. Heinlein Between Planets

TW Brown Zomblog

TW Brown Zomblog II

TW Brown The Final Entry

TW Brown Snoe

TW Brown Snoe's War

TW Brown Snoe's Journey

Adam Nevill The Reddening

Dean Koontz The Darkest Evening Of The Year

Bernard Taylor The Godsend

Carole Stivers The Mother Code

Spencer Quinn A Cat was Involved

Spencer Quinn Tail of Vengeance

Spencer Quinn Dog on It

Spencer Quinn Thereby Hangs a Tail

Spencer Quinn To Fetch a Thief

Spencer Quinn The Dog Who Knew Too Much

Spencer Quinn A Fistful of Collars

Spencer Quinn The Iggy Chronicles

Spencer Quinn The Sounds and the Furry

Spencer Quinn Paw and Order

Spencer Quinn Scents and Sensibilty

Spencer Quinn Heart of Barkness

Spencer Quinn Of Mutts and Men

Mark Tufo United States of Apocalypse

Robert Bevan Critical Failures VIII

Jeremy Robert Johnson The Loop

Nathan Hystad Red Creek

Nathan Hystad Return to Red Creek

Tom Abrahams The Scourge

Gary Small M.D The Naked Lady Who Stood on Her Head

Dean Koontz The Voice Of The Night

Mark Tufo The Spirit Clearing

Robert Paolini To Sleep in a Sea of Stars

Orson Scott Card Treasure Box

Ted Dekker House

Darcy Coates Hunted

Dean Koontz The Vision

Mark Tufo Encounters

Mark Tufo Reckoning

Mark Tufo Conquest

Mark Tufo From the Ashes

Mark Tufo Into the Fire

Mark Tufo Victory's Defeat

Mark Tufo Defeat's Victory

Brandon Sanderson The Original

Dean Koontz Elsewhere

Mike Baron Florida Man

Keith C Blackmore The Majestic 311

L.G. Estrella Two Necromancers a Dragon and a Vampire

L.G. Estrella The Hungry Dragon Cookie Company

L.G. Estrella a Dwarf Kingdom and a Sky City

Bobby Adair Zero Day

Bobby Adair Infected

Bobby Adair Destroyer

Bobby Adair Dead Fire

Bobby Adair Torrent

Bobby Adair Bleed

Bobby Adair City of Stin

Bobby Adair Grind

Bobby Adair Sanctum

Darcy Coates Ghost Camera

Susanna Clarke Piranesi

Marc-Uwe Kling QualityLand

Darcy Coates The Folcroft Ghosts

Charles Stross Dead Lies Dreaming

D.M. Siciliano Inside

Jim C. Hines Tamora Carter

Jamie McFarlane Junkyard Pirate

Yudhanjaya Wijeratne The Salvage Crew

Andy Mulvihill Action Park

Darcy Coates The Haunting of Blackwood House

Luke Arnold Dead Man in a Ditch

Iain Reid Foe

Micaiah Johnson The Space Between Worlds

Richard Kadrey Hollywood Dead

Richard Kadrey Ballistic Kiss

Orson Scott Card Lost and Found

Greig Beck To the Center of the Earth

Jenny Lawson Let's Pretend This Never Happened

Jenny Lawson Furiously Happy

Guy Adams Arkham County

James Patterson The Warning

James S. Murray Don't Move

Neal Asher Dark Intelligence

Luke Arnold The Last Smile in Sunder City

Jeff Menapace Dark Halls

Darcy Coates The Haunting of Rookward House

Laurel Hightower Crossroads

Pierce Brown Red Rising

Bobby Adair The Liar

Erik Henry Vick Demon King

Alister Hodge The Cavern

Linda S. Godfrey Monsters Among Us

Aaron Mahnke Dreadful Places

R. R. Haywood A Town Called Discovery

Kate Alice Marshall Rules for Vanishing

Ted Dekker The Girl Behind the Red Rope

Steve Alten Primal Waters

Steve Alten Hell's Aquarium

Steve Alten Nightstalkers

Steve Alten Generations

Adam Savage Every Tool's a Hammer

Darcy Coates Black Winter

Eoin Colfer Deny All Charges

David Moody Isolation

Jonathan Maberry Ink

Stephen Graham Jones The Only Good Indians

Barry J. Hutchison The Hunt for Reduk Topa

Lily Brooks-Dalton Good Morning, Midnight

[roswelldetails]

RNM 2x12 - Crash Into Me

EPISODE SUMMARY:

WELCOME TO CRASHCON — As the town prepares for CrashCon, Liz (Jeanine Mason) and Max (Nathan Dean) attempt to piece together who may be behind a potentially deadly plan targeting the festival.  Elsewhere, Maria (Heather Hemmens) and Isobel (Lily Cowles) take drastic measure to learn more about the night Mimi (guest star Sherri Saum) disappeared, while Michael (Michael Vlamis) is forced to do someone else’s bidding.

DETAILS:

Max is secretly practicing with his powers.  Was Max's "light cardio" actually just him trying to strengthen his powers?

Max has a land line. Hee. Which Liz doesn't mind answering for him.

Liz is looking for a pen on his desk when she finds the empty vials of the antidote.  Max plays them off as being leftover from when he had amnesia.

Liz mentions that the phone call was Max's bank calling to verify a deposit for him. 

Max is choosing not to worry about Michael because he and Isobel can feel that he's not badly injured or in serious danger.

Liz called Dirk:

"He said before she left she was getting nonstop calls from a 575 number. The Sunset Mesa facility where Mimi DeLuca lives."

"Wait, Mimi was calling your mom before the abductions?...Mimi was always obsessed with alien movies. Maybe fiction and reality are blurring. Your mom is working with Flint Manes who spent years making an alien-killing weapon while at Caulfield. What if your mom found out Rosa was killed by an alien? She'd want revenge."

Note: Max and I apparently think alike, because this was my assumption going into the episode as well. For the sake of detailing and not making this confusing plotline any more confusing...Max and I were both wrong. 

Also, I love that they mentioned cell service issues during Crash Con.  That is extremely realistic and makes a ton of sense, speaking from experience at like, concerts and baseball playoff games and such.

Maria gets Liz's voicemail and immediately confronts Mimi.

"I just got a message from Liz. Mom...when you disappeared, it was Helena Ortecho that took you...You didn't have butyricol in your system when they found you. You know Liz's mom. You'd remember if you spent a month with her.  Mom, are you covering for Helena?"

"Everything is going to be fine."

"I'm not fine. Alex and Michael are missing."

"Helena is a lot of things, but she won't hurt your friends. I'm sure… (Isobel walks in) You're the blonde. The one that Rosa was afraid of."

"Hi Mimi...I'm your cool Aunt Isobel.  Hopefully we can get to know each other under better circumstances sometime. Sure about this DeLuca?"

"Desperate times call for desperate alien invasions."

Isobel's first trip into Mimi's mindscape:

"Show me what happened the night you disappeared, Mimi."

Mimi turns to see headlights approaching. It's the hunting van. Helena is driving it. After they greet each other they talk in the van.

"I saw her. I saw her in a vision.

"I didn't believe you. I had to see it with my own eyes."

"You saw her.  You saw Rosa."

Flashback to Liz and Rosa arguing over Rosa's necklace in 2x01.  Just as a note, Isobel is in Mimi's head, not Helena's, so she shouldn't really be able to see this flashback since Mimi wasn't there when Helena saw Rosa.

"This is a good thing, Helena. Your daughter is alive. She needs you."

"When Jim Valenti was dying, I came home to say goodbye. He kept saying Rosa could live again, that she was preserved."

"But you didn't believe him. No one ever believes us."

"If Rosa is alive, it means Jim was telling the truth. Which means everything else he said could be true, like aliens are real and Jesse Manes has a weapon that can kill them. It means I have to go to war, Mimi. First, you need some shoes."

Then Mimi somehow kicks Isobel out of her memories, which gives Isobel a nosebleed. But Mimi doesn't seem to know what happened.  It's almost like she has a kind of subconscious protection on her own mind, somehow.

Note: the hunting van must not be Flint's, because Helena is driving it when she first considers teaming up with Flint, I assume based on the above.  Maybe she was the suspicious figure in Flint's house when Max and Kyle were hiding in the closet? And what about the car that Rosa blew up? Did she have access to multiple vehicles? Am I overthinking this?? Haha.

Kyle's tip to Max:

"I found this at Flint's, but it's from a florist my dad used when he was in the doghouse with my mom. I finally guessed the password today. Rosa's birthday. The only thing on it is a note my dad wrote to Helena. It's a lot of romantic crap followed by details for a storage unit he had up near Haystack Mountain."

Haystack Mountain is an off-road vehicle recreation area about 30 miles northeast of Roswell.

Michael working on the "bomb". Charlie is working on the toxin nearby and Helena is keeping an eye on both of them.

"This entire process would be more efficient if I could attach the release chamber to the other side."

"Ay, mijo. Now is not the time to get creative. Time is running out. Follow the blueprints exactly."

"You don't look like an obedient soldier. Who'd she take to force you to do her bidding?"

"A friend. It's complicated. Why are you helping her? Jenna's free."

"Flint Manes has a sniper rifle on the roof pointed at her bedroom window. If I step out of line and something happens…"

"You'll never forgive yourself."

"I'll never forgive myself anyway. Helena has me formulating a pathogen that I invented when I was 17.  It's a poison that dismantles specific DNA. If targeted your death is quick and ugly. A bleeding from every orifice kind of deal… I thought that I was saving people. Okay, imagine a weapon that you could drop into a populated city and the only people targeted would be al-Qaeda leaders and their direct descendants. Okay? In the right hands my weapon could prevent innocent civilian casualties and save our troops."

"I'm guessing these are not the right hands? Why am I building the bomb when the inventor is under Helena's thumb?"

"I do chemicals, not mechanics. And technically it's not a bomb. It's a catalytic toxin atomizer that was developed in a top secret operation involving weapons specialists from both the Army and the Air Force."

"Project Shepherd. One more question for you, Charlie. Whose DNA is that poison you're making gonna target?"

"Judging from conversations I've heard between Helena and Flint, it's alien DNA. Like, literal aliens."

This is actually the part of this story that's crystal clear to me. We've been getting tidbits on this dating back to 1x12, when Flint told Alex about his "smart bomb".  Jesse told Jenna in 2x04 about Charlie's toxin that could pinpoint specific DNA, and even used a similar metaphor in explaining it as Charlie did in this episode. The part that doesn't make sense to me is, why did FLINT need Michael to build it, if he developed the blueprints?

Liz and Rosa in the lab discussing Max taking the antidote.

"He's only supposed to take a drop when he has amnesia. It's not vitamin C. In high doses it could cause surges of adrenaline that could be dangerous."

"No offense, but you sound like a mom. Like a real mom, the kind who actually give a duck. Oh I just figured out what autocorrect is. It's hilarious."

"Speaking of moms, ours hasn't reached out to any of your old dealers and she hasn't shown up at any of the churches in town, so you got any other ideas?"

"It's CrashCon. We usually find her wearing the loudest t-shirts and flirting with the richest nerds."

"Yeah, but Flint and Jesse Manes hate aliens. I mean it's literally their only hobby. If she's with them, I'm betting she's lost her affection for the simple charms of UFO novelty kitch."

"Wait, if you were going to get revenge on aliens, CrashCon is the perfect place. There's all kinds of conspiracy theorists and press. You know how mom loves attention."

"You think something's gonna happen tonight?" 

"Papi is there by himself setting up. I think he should come home."

Note: my phone autocorrected duck to fuck. So I guess that tells you something about me. 😳

Also I just realized that for once ROSA and not Liz is the one who put the pieces together! Good for her. I wonder if that's purposeful since she's the daughter who is more like their mom? Like, she understands Helena's motivations better than Liz or something.

Steph and her father are going to CrashCon together. Kyle helps her with her makeup. Super sweet, but rather pointless since the scenes of Steph at CrashCon were cut. Mostly just including this here as a reminder that she's there in case it comes up in the finale.

Max and Cam, who got her job back!

"Thanks for the assist. I'm guessing that guard wouldn't let me through with bolt cutters unless I had an officer of the law present."

"Oh well, don't be jealous, Evans. Valenti has me on desk duty. So this little adventure is my lunch break."

"Valenti did the right thing, giving you your job back."

"Yeah well, you know, apparently some local bartender gave her reason to doubt the events the night of the gala were my fault. So I owe you."

"I've lost track of who owes who what at this point."

They break into the storage unit. It's empty except for an empty shelving unit, a locked chest, and a puddle of purple alien goo.

"What is that?"

"It looks like embryonic fluid. There must have been a pod in here."

Note: no, Max! Pod Goo evaporates upon contact with Earth's atmosphere/air. So it's not pod goo.

There isn't a super clear shot of inside the chest, but Max pulls out a love letter from Helena to Jim Valenti. I can transcribe it if you want me to. It's pretty easy to read and frankly, there's nothing important there. My heart is forever yours...it feels good to actually love and be loved in return...blah blah cheesy platitudes.

But seriously. Just send me an ask if you need me to transcribe it.  But I'm gonna skip for now.

Isobel is chugging acetone straight from the bottle in the middle of the Pony.

Isobel's second trip into Mimi's mindscape:

"Mimi. I know you think you're doing the right thing, but Helena is holding people hostage. We have to understand her motive."

"You all think I'm losing my mind. But I just...slip out of my time and into a different one every once in a while. Sometimes Maria's. Or Mama's. Other women in our future or past. I saw you when you were a baby. The sky was red."

"What can you tell me about your time with Helena? She had you for a month."

"We were in a motel. We watched movies. We laughed and gossiped. She wanted to trigger my visions...gather information."

"What information? What did you tell her? What did you see?"

"What's important is Helena will take care of our girls. I'm not afraid. That's enough."

Mimi kicks her out again.

"I tried.  She's fading."

"She's tired. It's harder when she's tired. Come on, Mom. I'm gonna take you back to Sunset Mesa."

"Maria, you just have to look for the signs in the water. You have to believe. Go on, you'd better hurry."

"Hurry where?"

"CrashCon closing night! You don't want to miss the fireworks. You always loved the fireworks."

Max and Cam going through the chest of letters back at Max's house:

"Okay, all these notes are from Helena to Jim Valenti. This is from the week Rosa died. I mean even 20 years after their affair she's still writing and he's still saving her letters."

"Pining after an Ortecho for years and years. It's so weird. Who does that. This is a receipt. It's a money transfer he made around the same time. He paid Daniel Fuller a thousand bucks."

"Fuller was the county coroner. Okay we still don't know how Noah got Rosa's body into the pod, right? But Jim had Project Shepherd connections to the morgue. So maybe if Noah knew about Jim and knew that he'd be grieving Rosa, he could have told him where to find the pod, right, and maybe he didn't even take the pod back until after Jim died."

"I mean, this is all a bunch of conjecture."

"Jim pulled me aside at high school graduation, he said I was the kind of guy the sheriff's department could use. Look, I mean maybe… I mean, he never let on, but maybe he knew I was an alien, right? Maybe he knew more than that."

"Okay, Evans? Breathe. You're looking a little clammy. What's going on?"

"Nothing."

"No. See, something's going on, and you're gonna tell me or I'm out, I swear to God."

"Okay you can't tell anyone."

"You know I won't."

"Okay, I've been taking this antidote that Liz made. No...she doesn't know. But its rebuilding some of my memories from before the 1947 crash, right? I was just a little kid, but I had a destiny. I had responsibilities."

"Right, you're the savior."

"Yes! Well, maybe. But I was starting to remember these symbols from our old language, right? I remember what they mean, but it's like the meaning is just out of reach. And I'm out of the antidote. And you know, Liz is getting suspicious. So…"

"No."

"I didn't say anything."

"Really? Can you tell that to your face? I am not using my friendship with your girlfriend to steal alien steroids for you. Okay? Our partnership has limits."

Michael and Helena:

"It's done. So now what? You inject my spine with your mind-eraser?"

"We only used the butyricol on Jenna Cameron because there was still work to be done. And Flint was afraid she'd ruin it for us. You told Flint Charlie was creating a toxin that would kill aliens. But if you wanted aliens dead, you'd be testing it on me right now. 'Cause that's what I would do if I was a criminal mastermind."

"I needed Flint for the schematics and the muscle. Our agendas didn't need to align perfectly."

"You don't have to do this. If you kill anyone tonight, Liz and Rosa will never look at you the same."

"That ship has sailed. Besides, I'm not killing anyone. If disaster never strikes, justice won't be served. Do you want to see Alex or not?"

Liz tries to get Arturo to go back to the Crashdown.  She tells him that the kitchen is backed up because it's so busy.  The interesting part of this exchange from a character perspective though:

"Papi, please. I have a bad vibe, all right? A gut feeling I can't shake."

Diego walks up.

"Who are you? Elizabeth Ortecho doesn't do feelings. She believes in facts and evidence."

"No, I do feelings now.  I've evolved."

Alex is chained up in the house.  There's a takeout box and coffee cup next to him. He's humming a song under his breath. Michael walks in and they talk.

"Guerin, you were right. They used me to get to you. My dad hit me over the head and then he swiped the piece of the console. And then Flint showed up with a gun to my head."

"Did anyone hurt you?"

"Nothing I can't handle. Helena's been weirdly motherly. She's bringing me clothes and meals."

"Your leg."

"Yeah they took the prosthetic. I tried to bludgeon my brother with it. Come on, use your powers. Get me out of this."

"Helena dosed me with something. I'm basically human until it wears off."

"Okay then find something that'll break the cuff or my wrist. I don't care."

"Alex, tonight at CrashCon, your dad plans to release a toxin that kills anyone with alien DNA...Helena made Charlie and I build an identical device, but one that targets a different DNA. She somehow got her hands on your dad's cells. She knows your dad killed Kyle's dad. She wants revenge.  But she wants him to take himself out. When he pulls the trigger on us tonight your dad's gonna die because of a device I built."

"No, that is not on you, okay? Now let me out of here."

"I can't. The atomizer will kill anyone in your dad's direct line. You are safer here."

"Are you serious?"

"And I gotta go. I'm gonna come back for you."

While Michael explains to Alex, we get a flashback to Helena in her totally fake blonde wig at the hospital in 2x02.

Helena disguises herself as Jesse's maid using her totally fake blonde wig and switches out the bombs while Jesse is in the shower.

The @ladiesofrnm have their first scene all together! (With Max...and eventually Michael…) reading through Helena's letters together. Michael makes quite an entrance. Afterwards:

"You're such an idiot! You don't comply with a kidnapper's ransom demands. Without telling me."

"Alex was in trouble. He had to go."

"Mikey, where are Alex and Charley?"

"They're safe. Your mom doesn't want to hurt them."

"Look I don't get it. Does she want to kill aliens?"

"No. She's avenging her murdered lover."

Back to the house where Helena talks to Charlie:

"This atomizer contains the poison that kills anyone with alien DNA. I need you to destroy it."

"Does Flint know that you have it?"

"Flint. Jesse really broke that boy. Some people were never meant to be parents. You can go when you're done.  The door's unlocked. Flint's rifle shoots blanks."

"What's to stop me from leaving now?"

"The knowledge that that deadly device only exists because of you. You decide. I'm off to CrashCon. I hear there will be quite a show."

Note, when Helena says Flint's name she says a word in Spanish that I can't make out and isn't in the closed captions.

Max and Liz's conversation about racism and privilege:

"I want to help. Your mom's not the villain here. All right? She's going about this all wrong, yes. But Manes is already a murderer. I mean, if he'd succeeded today…"

"I know...I could have lost almost everyone I care about in a moment. I remember every day what it was like to lose you and Rosa. I don't think I could survive that again. She could've built a decoy bomb that wouldn't have hurt anyone."

"He'd just get angry and do it again."

"Yeah, but he's not the only one that this would hurt. I mean, the headlines if she gets caught? Illegal Mexican Immigrant Slaughters Decorated American Vet via Bioweapon. People will line up to lay bricks at the border wall. But hey, maybe the president will talk about my family at his rallies. That's gonna be fun."

"That's not gonna happen. This will get covered up like every other strange death in this town."

"In case you haven't noticed those cover-ups don't tend to protect the Mexicans. Even when…"

"Even when Rosa died. You can say it, Liz. It's okay. It's fair. Rosa got blamed. White people didn't. Okay? I get it."

"I know you're on my side, but you don't get this. And that's not your fault, that's just the reality of our experiences. If I mess up. If I so much as roll through a stop sign, it reflects badly on any Mexican who came before me. And it hurts any Mexican who comes after me. I used to think that nothing would ever change that, but lately I think...maybe if something extraordinary happened it could."

"Extraordinary? Like what you're doing in your lab?"

"I've discovered something that could be the key to curing people who have no hope otherwise. I can't walk away."

"So you're gonna turn my family's stem cells into the hottest commodity?"

"No, I won't. I...we'll find a way to synthesize it or replicate it."

"Is this about the people you're trying to save or about becoming the poster girl for immigrants everywhere? You want the president to talk about your family because of you. Because you saved the world."

"If those in power see what happens when people are given opportunity…"

"You want the glory."

"I want recognition. I want to be the example I never had. And people who want glory, they're just in it for selfish reasons. People like Jesse Manes want the glory. He wants to be a big American hero. He wants the parades, he wants the medals. If he sets off his alien atomizer at CrashCon, a handful of twenty-something's will die of some mysterious ailment and it's barely gonna make the news. That's not what he wants. We're missing part of his plan."

"First, something violent. Large-scale that'll draw media attention. And then, once all eyes are in Roswell…"

"He'll blame the violence on the aliens. He only gets his parade if he makes people afraid and then he destroys the thing that they fear. If he makes people think that you're terrorists before he kills you."

Graham Green's reveal at CrashCon.  Graham is announced and takes the stage as Max, Liz, and Rosa arrive to find Michael, Isobel, and Maria nearby.

"Hey, you guys shouldn't be here."

"I was held hostage, Max. I deserve to ride the Sizzler until I barf cotton candy, and maybe watch a bad man die."

"You guys, we think that…"

Graham Green starts his presentation.

"Hello loyal fans and devoted supporters! You patience is about to be rewarded. Today I am thrilled, nay, honored to show you the result of years or painstaking work. The moment we've all been waiting for. Irrefutable extraterrestrial proof! A bona fide alien artifact!"

Graham pulls the curtain and reveals what appears to be something similar to Michael's console, only it is complete and intact.

Flint brings Alex food and they discuss Flint's motives:

"If you're doing this to impress dad, it is never gonna work."

"I'm not trying to impress dad. His shutdown of Project Shepherd was an inform decision, but he's trained me my entire life to take it on.

Flint goes to leave but Alex stops him.

"Do you remember when mom used to drive us to the res, and you would sit at the loom with Granddad? Weaving stories. When was the last time you made something, Flint? Anything that wasn't built to destroy?" 

"Around the time that mom decided that to leave dad, she had to leave us."

"She didn't know what he would do to us."

"He didn't do anything to us. Me and Clay are fine. He'll, even Gregory is coming to see dad today."

"...You are wrong. We are all dad's victims. Sure, he beat me up, but what he put the rest of you through was abuse too. He made you watch while he kicked my ass… He scared you into thinking that there was only one type of man that you could become."

Alex manages to knock Flint out, steal the key to his handcuffs, and free himself.

"You're so pathetic. You don't know me at all. This has nothing to do with dad and everything to do with our history. Aliens are a foreign threat. They're invaders."

Back to CrashCon, where the gang discuss the alien object:

"Alex's piece must have been the last one that Manes needed to finish building it. Where's he been keeping the rest of this?"

Sanders appears out of nowhere.

"Kid, I seen that thing before. Your mother built that back in the old barn. I don't know what it is, but it is definitely explosive. I always wondered what'd happened to the pieces."

"Maybe Harlan or Tripp Manes gathered them up. Rebuilt it."

"Yeah but if Manes is gonna use that to blow up CrashCon, it's gonna make Graham Green look like the bad guy. No one's gonna think an alien planted it."

"Unless they follow the money. I got an alert from my bank this morning. A $10,000 deposit had cleared."

"You think Manes set it up so that the investigation would lead to you?"

"If I become the world's first alien terrorist and he takes me out, the world cheers."

"Guys, you need to do whatever you can to get as many people out of here as possible, okay? Get help."

"Hey, where are you going?"

"Michael and I have studied this material before. It's part tech, but it's also part organic. And if it's part organic, that means it can be killed. I gotta get back to my lab."

Diego sees Max toss Liz his keys.

Max and Michael sneak backstage and convince Graham Green to let them have a moment with the alien ship thingie. Max takes photos of it with his phone.

"Do you think we can destroy it?"

"No. The pieces want to be together and now that it's complete if we break the bonds with brute force we risk a violent reaction."

Max hears voices whispering and reaches out to touch the alien tech. The alien symbol forms under his hand and he pressed it.  There's a surge from the tech and it almost appears like Max is absorbing something from it. The voices get a little louder. When he breaks the connection it almost seems like it takes effort and he seems stunned.

"What the hell just happened to you?"

"Nothing. I think this is a remote. I think this controls a ship."

"It's a what?"

Gif by @maxortecho

Note, the way Max laughs when he says nothing is oddly similar to how he responded to Cam when she called him out on his weird behavior from the antidote. Like he's hiding something or brushing off the worry or something. 

Sanders interrupts before Max can respond. Points out that the top of the stage is varnished which is highly flammable. 

"Wait, if this is fresh varnish, this whole platform is set up like a tinderbox."

"There's gonna be fireworks tonight."

"One spark'll light a fire. I mean, this whole thing, the whole platform will go up."

"If this giant remote goes kaboom aliens will be framed as terrorists. You have to get out of here."

"What? No. I'm not going anywhere."

"Max you are all sorts of worked up right now. What happens when you're worked up?"

"Sparks fly. Right, okay. Yeah. I'll go."

Before Max leaves he spots something on one of the display boards that makes him pause. He grabs it before leaving.

Charlie is working on her chemicals in the makeshift lab when Flint sneaks up on her and puts a gun to her head, demanding that she gives him the atomizer.

Maria and Rosa hurry through CrashCon discussing each other's alien biology and Mimi's vision. They spot Gregory Manes and decide to try to get him to leave since the Manes bomb would kill him. He has 12 kids with them so they suggest that he take them to the Crashdown for free milkshakes. He recognizes Rosa, but they tell him she's Rosa's cousin. 

Liz works in the lab while blasting Alanis Morissettte - great call back to last year when she told Michael that Alanis helped her channel Rosa's creativity. She says to herself:

"Destroy the organic cell membrane. Disable the nanotech." 

She mixes some chemicals which react and explode her flask and start a fire. Really don't know if that's supposed to represent success or not. 

Flint and Helena talk at CrashCon. She is surprised to see him.  He tells her that he cleaned up the mess at the house. 

We flash back to the house which is on fire.  Charlie is chained up and trapped.

Liz hurries from the lab and doesn't realize that Diego followed her there.  He sneaks his way into the building while Liz rushes for the car.

Speaking of cars...they're in the middle of nowhere. Where's Diego's car? I had the same thought last week when Max and Kyle were searching Flint's house and they almost got caught. Whoever pulled up in the hunting van should have seen their car!

Maria and Rosa are helping get the kids loaded onto a bus when Rosa points out Pisces to Maria. Call back to 1x03 when Maria tells Liz that she and Rosa used to compete to see which one of them could spot the constellation first. It gives Maria an epiphany. Pisces is "the water sign" which was one of Mimi's clues from her vision.  Maria goes to follow the sign. She runs into Max who tries to get her to safety. They spot Flint Manes carrying the atomizer. Max tells Maria to get out of there and hurries after Flint. He tries to sneak up on Flint, but Flint is able to disarm him and beat him up. Flint sets the atomizer to go off in two minutes and then throws it like a Hail Mary into the crowd. Max chases after Flint while Maria goes after the atomizer. She pushes through the crowd and spots another clue from Mimi's vision - a poster of aliens asking "Do you believe?" The atomizer is sitting below it. Maria grabs the atomizer and takes off running with it. Cam spots Maria and follows. 

Flint beats Max up again and then pulls a gun and threatens to shoot Max. Max disarms him and is holding the gun to Flint now. He laughs and asks Max if he's really going to shoot a soldier. Tells him that he already pulled the trigger to kill Max by setting off the atomizer. Max tosses the gun aside, and uses his powers instead to kill Flint,

Michael and Isobel are trying to keep the stage from catching fire, but then the fireworks start going off into the wind (which blows the embers towards the fair). The hay bales easily catch on fire. Isobel used her powers to hold back the flames.  She can feel that something is wrong with Max and send Michael to find him. 

Instead Michael finds Jesse and Alex. Their exchange: 

"You know, I actually started to believe that you had changed."

"You never could tell friend from foe. I actually counted on it."

"Hey I know exactly who you are. You were gonna let all of these people die and you were gonna let the aliens take the blame."

"It's high time they got blamed for something, I think. I'm gonna drag them from the shadows."

"Yeah and then what? You're gonna use the atomizer to kill them all? Then you become some hero by destroying the enemy that you created?"

"American children are gonna read about the events of tonight in their history books... And don't worry about collateral damage, son. That's just an unfortunate aspect of war. You know that better than anyone, Alex."

"You're gonna become your own collateral damage if that thing goes off. Helena Ortecho switched the devices. That's not gonna kill aliens.  That is set to destroy your DNA. If it goes off, you are going to die in a puddle of your own blood."

"What are you doing? Are you bluffing to protect the aliens?"

"What I'm doing is I'm trying to protect our family. Dad, if that goes off it kills all of your direct descendants. Flint and Greg are somewhere in here. And I don't care how much I disgust you, I am still your son!"

Greg runs up looking for help responding to the fire. He spots the atomizer and immediately recognizes it as a weapon. Alex tries to get him to leave. Michael runs up and Jesse pulls his gun on him. Greg steps between Michael and the gun to protect Michael for Alex.

Maria throws the atomizer off into the desert and immediately begins bleeding. Thankfully Cam is there to try to help.

Max kills Flint which in turn gives him another heart attack. Liz arrives as he's collapsing and starts CPR. Rosa runs up and tries to get Liz to let her step in to help Max so that Liz can stop the alien device from exploding… And cliffhanger.

MUSIC:

1.  Valley Queen "Chasing The Muse"

2.  The HawtThorns "Give Me A Sign"

3.  Everclear "Everything To Everyone"

4.  Alanis Morissette "All I Really Want"

5.  Gary Numan "I Am Dust"

[crimsoncityhq]

The Washington Gala: Chicago Day of Giving Part II

The night winds down, and the guests gather up their belongings for the long trek home when a voice rings out from the stage, presenting the winner of the door prize. Everyone holds their breath in hopes they’ll be presented with the Bugatti parked out front, draped in a bright red bow and the object of every patron’s desire. The speaker sucks in a breath as he tears into the envelope, just wrapping his lips around a name when a high-pitched, technical beep shrieks from under the stage. The platform bursts into flame, blowing debris, blood, and entrails into the first few rows of tables—and the panic sets in. The guests turn on their heels and find the exits blocked by burly Vasiles cradling machine guns in their arms and wolfish grins on their lips. There’s only one escape, and that’s to the maze garden, but anyone can guess it’s a mouse trap with its winding walls and dead ends. Still, choices are limited and adrenaline is rushing, so the crowd takes the bait, scurrying past the threshold and into the garden. The Vasiles are locked and loaded, hidden in the shadows and thirsty for victims. 

In part II, your character has a choice. You may stay with your group and work together—even with your enemies—to survive, or you can search for a familiar face and pray you all make it out alive. Only the Vasiles and police officers have weapons, save for the tableware your muse may have swiped up before fleeing to the maze garden. Avoid the fountain in the center of the maze; there will be someone waiting for you. No matter how you choose to go about it, there’s one rule of thumb to abide by: don’t get c a u g h t.

The Washington Gala: Chicago Day of Giving Part II begins now and ends on Monday, June 1st, at 11:59 p.m. EST. You’re welcome to have your characters injured ( or injure others, with permission from the mun ), just please let us know beforehand. Again, you may opt to stay in your groups, or your character can find their respective families/connections and work in tandem to escape.

As a reminder, your groups are under the cut—sans the Vasiles, of course.

GROUP 1 — Audric Noire, Fletcher Hargrave,  Rosalie ‘Rosie’ Halliday, Jacob ‘Thorne’ Louthorne

GROUP 2 — Christopher ‘Chris’ Evans, Kitty O’Shea, Xavier Harris

GROUP 3 —  Daniel Adler, Gerald O’Shea, Nova Devereaux, Allegra Cooper, Darren Murphy, Joel Maddison

GROUP 4 — Esmeray Demir, Hana Faust, Koa Naihe, Sebastian Hargrave, Cassandra Harris

GROUP 5— Adrian Brooks, Davut Demir, Juliet Leon, Levi Bohan, August Brooks, Julianna Hellthorpe

GROUP 6 — Audrey Rousseau, Oliver Faust, Chaeyoung Moon

GROUP 7 — Amelia O’Shea, Effie Faust,  Ophelia O’Shea, Veronica Pierce, Logan Washington

GROUP 8 — Angelique Calore, Hayden Dixon, Kian Hannigan, Peyton Bridges

GROUP 9 — Angelo Madden, Clara Davila, Isaak Peters, Tia Valentine, Tyson Kane, Milena Washington

GROUP 10 — Ingrid Vasile, Autumn Dawson, Cecilia 'Cee’ Cavendish, 

GROUP 11 — Amara Ricci, Summer Moore

GROUP 12 — Caleb Duval, Eva Clarke, Faith Williams, Leslie Adal Galahad, Richie O’Shea

GROUP 13 — Calhoun O'Farrell, Erin Cerci, Gemma Faust, Nathan Anderson, 

GROUP 14 — Asli Demur, Charlotte O'Day, Gabriel Hill, Maisie Kane, Samuel O’Shea

GROUP 15 — Arielle Hernandez, Diamond Washington, Penelope 'Poppy’ Levenberg, Ren Daae, Teagan Michaels

GROUP 16 — Blair Faust, Edgar Ortega, Giovanni Rossi, Holden Mercer, Zoe Washington

GROUP 17 — Brayden Adler, Darcy Faust, Liam O’Shea,  Maggie Lee,  Isabella Rossi

GROUP 18 —  Evander 'Evan’ Montague, Wynter Ellis, Christian Yi, Edith Cohen

GROUP 19 — Rylin Dixon, Harley Kincaid, Maeve O’Connell, Teddy Cohen, Sawyer Nichols

GROUP 20 — Alexander Washington, Dawn Montgomery, Andromeda O’Shea

GROUP 21 — David Sharpe, Jace Dubois, Lenny Navarro, Rahi Kumar

GROUP 22 — Dominic Murphy, Sloan Washington, Wesley ‘Wes’ Ahn

GROUP 23 — Aurora O’Shea, Caroline Shepherd, Jesse Valencia, Rosalia Leon

GROUP 24 — Avery Simmons, Genevieve Bisset, Monika Adler, Andrew Whitmore

GROUP 25 — Birdie Mendoza, Zane Washington, Andrea Reed

GROUP 26 — Blue Daniels, Marizia di Greco, Violet Madden

[katiewattsart]

DOMESTIC SPACE LECTURE

Alec Soth – The Reverend and Margaret’s Bedroom, 2002

André Kertész , “La Fourchette, 1928”

King Solomon (Egg Slicer), 1941, André Kertész

Bowl with Sugar Cubes, 1928, André Kertész

In 1952 Kertesz and Elizabeth moved to Fifth Avenue. Their 12th floor apartment had a small terrace that commanded a view over Washington Square Park directly below, and Kertesz had a broad view to the south and west. He began a series of work from his windows and terrace.

William Eggleston

On May 25, 1976, Eggleston made his MoMA debut with a show of 75 prints, titled "William Eggleston’s Guide." It was the first solo show dedicated to colour photographs at the museum; colour photography’s mainstream acceptance still faced a barrier. But where other photographers like Shore and Saul Leiter had tried, to varying degrees of success, to crack it, Eggleston wielded a hammer. The show and its accompanying monograph would become landmark moments in the history of photography.

Born in 1939 In Memphis, Tennessee

William Eggleston assumes a neutral gaze and creates his art from commonplace subjects: a farmer's muddy Ford truck, a red ceiling in a friend's house, the contents of his own refrigerator. In his work, Eggleston photographs "democratically"--literally photographing the world around him. His large-format prints monumentalize everyday subjects, everything is equally important; every detail deserves attention.

Getty Museum

William Eggleston, 1971

William Eggleston, Untitled, 1980, from Louisiana Project

Sian Bonnell

Everyday Dada & When the Domestic Meets the Wild

Everyday Dada

When the Domestic Meets the Wild, Sian Bonnell

Nigel Shafran

Shafran has chosen to concentrate his work on what he knows best, on what he understands more then anyone else: his own life - the most personal relationships, the most familiar spaces and objects, the most ordinary, everyday situations. His work is about preserving identity and uniqueness: it quietly records what is unique to him. As he has said: ‘My photographs are the ones that only I can make.'

David Chandler, Director, Photoworks.

Washing-up 2000

4th January 2000. Three bean soup, cauliflower vegetable cheese. Morning coffee and croissants.

30th January 2000. Flowers for Lillie Donaldson’s 13th birthday. Crumpets and rosehip tea, left-over squash, pepper soup, homemade pizza.

19th February 2000. Toast, smoked salmon sandwich, Thai coconut veg and rice with Dave [Ruth at Charlotte’s tonight].

27th June. Muesli, cheese sandwich at darkroom, Ruth back from Leeds, vegetarian restaurant, Blah blah blah, Shepherds Bush.

The photographer Walker Evans said a great thing: that he worked rather blindly. I don't like to think too much about what I do either. When inspiration comes, I try not to get in the way. My work is about a build-up of images, often in sequences. There is a connection between them all. Basically, I'm a one-trick pony: it's all life and death and that's it.

(Shafran, 2010)

A Room for Solace: An Exhibition of Domestic Interiors

Alec Soth, the acclaimed took on the role of curator for: A Room for Solace: An Exhibition of Domestic Interiors. This is a collection of images that depict intimacy via interiors. Central to the exhibition is the idea of respite, and how by capturing private scenes photographers are able to present a view of the world that is just as powerful as a public image. Photographers have long sought out domestic spaces as subjects, and it is the relevance of such images in the context of uncertain times that Soth hones in on with A Room for Solace.

Belle Hutton, AnOther Journal, 2019

Sirkka Liisa Konttinen, Emma Dowds (Step by Step series), 1982

Fred Herzog, My Room, Harwood Street, 1958

Laura Letinsky, Untitled #38 from the series Hardly More Than Ever, 2001

Elliot Erwitt, Valencia, Spain, 1952

Margaret Watkins, The Kitchen Sink, 1919

René Magritte / Paul Nougé, Intérieur de Paul Nougé, en arriere plan “Portrait de Paul Nougé”; (1927), c. 1928.

Takashi Yasumura, A Doorknob Cover, 2000

Chris Verene, Untitled, from Galesburg series, 1994 “Grandpa and I went to visit his friend, Turney, at the Millionaire’s Rest Home. They used to work on the railroad together.”

“With this exhibition, I want to take a break from the fractious public square of photography and wander quietly into people’s homes,” the photographer writes in a statement about the exhibition. “Behind these doors I hope to find a sliver of solace in these unstable times.”

Alec Soth

Rebecca Norris Webb, Homestead Blizzard (from My Dakota) 2010

TASK

You will ...

• Research an established photographer whose work examines ‘Domestic Space’

• Write a short analysis of the project you have chosen

• Recreate one photographic image as an ‘Homage’ to your chosen artist

• Upload your researched image, a short synopsis of their work, and your photographic response, to a shared slide presentation to present on 21st May.

My response:

[tabloidtoc]

Life & Style, April 13

You can purchase a copy of this magazine at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Angelina Jolie’s Ultimatum to Brad Pitt -- Dump Jennifer Aniston or Lose Custody 

Page 1: Photo Flash -- Bindi Irwin kisses new husband Chandler Powell at their wedding at the Australia Zoo 

Page 2: Contents

Page 6: Twinning -- Tracee Ellis Ross vs. Gigi Hadid, Thandie Newton vs. January Jones 

Page 7: Kristen Bell vs. Meghann Fahy

Page 8: Caitlyn Jenner wants to join RHOBH 

Page 9: Tamron Hall may be a hit with viewers at home but behind the scenes the daytime talk show host has gained quite a reputation for being a horrible boss, Throwback -- Dolly Parton 

Page 10: George and Amal Clooney can’t agree on where to live and it’s causing tension at home, Johnny Depp is selling treasure including his Kentucky horse farm at a bargain in order to pay for his never-ending legal battles with Amber Heard 

Page 12: Jennifer Garner warns Ben Affleck that Ana de Armas is just using him for fame 

Page 13: Lana Del Rey and police officer Sean “Sticks” Larkin called it quits after six months together but instead of jumping right back into the dating pool she is taking a break from men indefinitely, since she’s been hosting her own daytime talk show and coaching contestants on The Voice and preparing for a Las Vegas residency and recording new songs Kelly Clarkson hasn’t had much time for husband Brandon Blackstock but a recent trip to their cozy Montana cabin gave the couple’s marriage a much-needed lift, VIP Style -- Molly Sims (pictured), Antoni Porowski (pictured), Rachel Brosnahan, Perez Hilton, Gwyneth Paltrow and Brad Falchuk, Rebecca Gayheart and Eric Dane, Jesse Tyler Ferguson (pictured) 

Page 14: The Week in Photos -- Nina Dobrev and Shaun White and her dog Maverick on a bike ride 

Page 16: Puppy Love -- Rachel Brosnahan in a staring contest with dog Winston, Tyler Cameron and dog Harley, Brooke Burke took her pair of German Shepherds for a walk 

Page 17: Kaley Cuoco and her dog Norman, Zoe Kravitz and her dog Scout 

Page 18: Simon Cowell grocery shopping in LA 

Page 19: Isla Fisher and a carrot, Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban at his Instagram Live concerts 

Page 20: Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez, Joe Jonas 

Page 21: Candice Swanepoel swimming at the beach in Miami 

Page 22: Stars Behaving Badly -- Post Malone grabbed himself onstage in Atlanta 

Page 23: Bebe Rexha flips the bird, Bella Hadid eats a burrito topless, Dylan Sprouse pretends to attack a photographer outside a party in West Hollywood 

Page 26: Say What?! Kendall Jenner, Keri Russell, Justin Bieber, Octavia Spencer

Page 28: Michelle Williams secretly married to baby daddy Thomas Kail 

Page 29: Zendaya gave boyfriend Jacob Elordi a key to her new $4 million mansion after less than a year of dating, Love Is Blind’s Amber Pike and Matt Barnett are slowing down on their relationship, Romance Report Card -- Kevin Hart A, Sarah Hyland B+, Halsey C

Page 30: Cover Story -- Angelina Jolie orders Brad Pitt to choose: Jennifer Aniston or the kids? 

Page 34: 5 juicy revelations from Colton Underwood’s tell-all 

Page 36: Celebs on Lockdown -- whose relationship will survive? Carrie Underwood and Mike Fisher 

Page 37: Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, Reese Witherspoon and Jim Toth 

Page 38: Fears grow for Queen Elizabeth after her heir Prince Charles contracts coronavirus 

Page 40: Look-Alike Celebrities 

Page 42: Who Lives Here? Gabrielle Union and Dwyane Wade 

Page 44: Entertainment 

Page 45: Star Review -- Whitney Port

Page 46: Beauty -- don’t overlook undereyes -- Kerry Washington 

Page 48: Pink Hair Don’t Care -- Anna Paquin, Busy Philipps, Ashley Benson, Charlotte Lawrence, Meghan Trainor 

Page 49: Kristen Stewart, Lady Gaga 

Page 50: Style Crush -- Shay Mitchell 

Page 52: Diva or Down-to-Earth? Diva Rita Ora has a photo shoot posse, diva Reese Witherspoon gets her makeup done 

Page 53: Down-to-Earth Jon Voight buys a basketful of Bounty, down-to-Earth Alessandra Ambrosio walks her dog Cinnamon 

Page 54: Social Stars Posts of the Week -- Laura Dern and Reese Witherspoon, Jessica Simpson and kids Maxwell and Ace, Dua Lipa, Asa Butterfield and his cat 

Page 55: Amy Schumer and husband Chris Fischer and son Gene, Kourtney Kardashian, Hannah Brown and Tyler Cameron and pals, John Legend and son Miles 

Page 56: Horoscope -- Aries Kristen Stewart, They’re Not Together But They Should Be -- Gemini Chris Evans and Sagittarius Katie Holmes 

Page 58: Made Ya Look -- James Corden and Justin Bieber try their best to follow a tiny dancer’s choreography 

Page 60: What I’m Into -- Pauly D 

[aa-bgen]

Chris Hemsworth 7.5”//10” T100

Leander B 7”//10” T100

Ben L 7”//10” T95

Angus F 6.5”//10” T95

Mikhail Varshavski 6”//10” T100

Zachary Levi 6”//10” T100

Stephen Long 6”//10” T100

Chris Pratt 7”//9.5” T100

Colin Farrell 7”//9.5” T100

Eddie McClintock 7”//9.5” T100

Vin Diesel 6//9.5” T100

Jack A 6”//9.5” T90

Tim M 6”//9.5” T100

Matthew Broderick 6”//9.5” T80

Scooter Braun 7”//9” T100

Hugh Jackman 7”//9” T100

Ben Affleck 7”//9” T100

Jason Statham 7”//9” T100

Ryan Reynolds 7”//9” T85

Jean Dujardin 7”//9” T100

Andy Cohen 7”//9” T100

Max Wyatt 7”//9” T100

Joe Manganiello 7”//9” T100

Ricardo Hurtado 7”//9” T90

Freddie Flintoff 7”//9” T100

Dylan Matthews 7”//9” T100

Luke Evans 6.5”//9” T100

Liam Hemsworth 6.5”//9” T80

KJ Apa 6”//9” T80

Sebastian Stan 6”//9” T80

Michael Landes 6”//9” T95

Harry D 6”//9” T100

Sam S 6”//9” T90

Brendon Urie 5”//9” T70

Jay Harrington 7”//8.5” T100

Finn Cole 7”//8.5” T90

David Boreanaz 6.5”//8.5” T100

Matt Johnson 6”//8.5” T100

Roman Kemp 6.5”//8.5” T90

Frank Grillo 6”//8.5” T100

Elliot A 6”//8.5” T80

Steve Backshall 6”//8.5” T100

Alex Russell 6”//8.5” T95

Bradley Cooper 6”//8.5” T100

Chris Evans 6”//8.5” T90

Ben Stiller 6”//8.5” T100

George Eads 6”//8.5” T80

Kevin Jonas 6”//8.5” T95

Chord Overstreet 6”//8.5” T90

Jacob L 6”//8.5” T100

Luke C 5.5”//8.5” T100

Dan Tai 5”//8.5” T90

Tyler Posey 5”//8.5” T75

Henry Cavill 7”//8” T95

TJ Thyne 6.5”//8” T90

Ethan S 6.5”//8” T95

Michael Grant Terry 6”//8” T90

Ted Pullin 6”//8” T75

Kit Harrington 6”//8” T100

Will Smith 6”//8” T100

Harry K 6”//8” T50

Josh Dun 6”//8” T90

Max Irons 6”//8” T95

Mark Wahlberg 6”//8” T100

James Wolk 6”//8” T80

David Duchovny 6”//8” T100

Daniel Craig 6”//8” T100

Beau Mirchoff 6”//8” T90

Liam Payne 6”//8” T85

Jack Griffo 6”//8” T100

Daniel Ricciardo 6”//8” T95

Miles Fisher 6”//8” T90

Devon Sawa 6”//8” T100

John Legend 6”//8” T100

Chris Ramsey 6”//8” T90

Logan Miller 6”//8” T100

Tom Hardy 6”//8” T90

Alexander Ludwig 6”//8” T100

Ramin Karimloo 5.5”//8” T100

Jake Johnson 5.5”//8” T90

Mark Salling 5.5”/8” T100

John Krasinski 5.5”//8” T90

Matthew Morrison 5.5”//8” T95

Tom Summerbee 5.5”//8” T95

Lee Mack 5”//8” T100

William McSherry 5”//8” T50

Greg Rutherford 5”//8” T100

Darren Criss 6”//7.5” T75

Owen Farrell 6”//7.5” T95

Tom Holland 6”//7.5” T50

Paddy McGuinness 6”//7.5” T95

Gino D’Acampo 6”//7.5” T100

Ben Shepherd 6”//7.5” T100

Shawn Mendes 6”//7.5” T45

Mark Shadrick 6”/7.5” T100

Ben G 6”//7.5” T70

John Francis Daley 5”//7.5” T85

Avan Jogia 5”//7.5” T50

Matt LeBlanc 5”//7.5” T100

David Caves 5”//7.5” T100

Eric Szmanda 5”//7.5” T45

Jonathan Brown 5”//7.5” T95

Alex M 5”//7.5” T100

Jace Norman 5”//7.5” T85

Jimmy Fallon 5”//7.5” T90

Huw Rees 5”//7.5” T100

Asa Butterfield 5”//7.5” T65

Nick Jonas 4.5”//7.5” T65

Fred Siriex 6.5”//7” T80

Jamie Redknapp 6”//7” T75

Jamie T 6”//7” T85

Rhys M 6”//7” T60

Barnaby Wakeford 6”//7” T85

Russell Howard 5.5”//7” T90

Adam Levine 5.5”//7” T85

Ollie C 5.5”//7” T90

Joe Jonas 5”//7” T70

Jake Gyllenhaal 5”//7” T90

Tom Cruise 5”//7” T100

Cory Monteith 5”/7” T90

Claudiu N 5”//7” T100

Ethan M 5”//7” T80

Max Whitlock 5”//7” T80

Gethin Jones 5”//7” T100

John Boyd 5”//7” T60

Jon Richardson 5”//7” T45

Asher Angel 5”//7” T60

Jacob Sartorius 5”//7” T40

Tom Ellis 5”//7” T75

Thomas Kuc 5”//7” T60

Jack G 5”//7” T50

Shawn Ashmore 5”//7” T65

Evan M 5”//7” T40

Josh Hutcherson 5”//7” T75

Aneurin Barnard 4.5”//7” T80

Robert Irwin 4.5”//7” T60

Cristiano Ronaldo 4”//7” T100

Pete Wentz 5”//6.5” T80

Joel Dommett 5”//6.5” T90

Jeremy Renner 5”//6.5” T90

Woody S 5”//6.5” T90

Chaning Tatum 5”//6.5” T100

Ryan Bergara 4”//6.5” T100

Scott Mitchell 4”//6.5” T90

Max Emerson 4”//6.5” T35

Will Mellor 5”//6” T100

Kevin Pietersen 5”//6” T60

Harry E 5”//6” T85

Rob Beckett 4.5”//6” T95

Justin Bieber 4”//6” T40

Jimmy Carr 4”//6” T65

Romesh Ranganathan 4”//6” T95

Richard Wells 4”//6” T100

Dan P 4”//5.5” T30

Lewis T 4”//5.5” T20

Niall C 4”//5” T10

[pamphletstoinspire]

Gospel Reading and Commentary for Tuesday, January 8, 2019 - Roman Catholic - Mark 6: 34 - 44

34. And Jesus, when He came out, saw many people, and was moved with compassion toward them, because they were as sheep not having a shepherd: and He began to teach them many things.

Gloss.: The Evangelist, after relating the death of John, gives an account of those things which Christ did with His disciples after the death of John, saying, “And the Apostles gathered themselves together unto Jesus, and told Him all things, both what they had done, and what they had taught.”

Pseudo-Jerome: For they return to the fountain-head whence the streams flow; those who are sent by God, always offer up thanks for those things which they have received.

Theophylact: Let us also learn, when we are sent on any mission, not to go far away, and not to overstep the bounds of the office committed, but to go often to him, who sends us, and report all that we have done and taught; for we must not only teach but act.

Bede: Not only do the Apostles tell the Lord what they themselves had done and taught, but also His own and John’s disciples together tell Him what John had suffered, during the time that they were occupied in teaching, as Matthew relates.

It goes on: “And He said to them, Come ye yourselves apart, &c.”

Augustine, de Con. Evan., 2, 45: This is said to have taken place, after the passion of John, therefore what is first related took place last, for it was by these events that Herod was moved to say, “This is John the Baptist, whom I beheaded.”

Theophylact: Again, He goes into a desert place from His humility. But Christ makes His disciples rest, that men who are set over others may learn, that they who labour in any work or in the word deserve rest, and ought not to labour continually.

Bede: How arose the necessity for giving rest to His disciples, He shews, when He adds, “For there were many coming and going, and they had no leisure so much as to eat;” we may then see how great was the happiness of that time, both from the toil of the teachers, and from the diligence of the learners.

It goes on: “And embarking in a ship, they departed into a desert place privately.”

The disciples did not enter into the ship alone, but taking up the Lord with them, they went to a desert place, as Matthew shews. [Matt 14] Here He tries the faith of the multitude, and by seeking a desert place He would see whether they care to follow Him. And they follow Him, and not on horseback, nor in carriages, but laboriously coming on foot, they shew how great is their anxiety for their salvation.

There follows: “And the people saw them departing, and many knew Him, and ran afoot [p. 120] thither out of all cities, and outwent them.”

In saying that they outwent them on foot, it is proved that the disciples with the Lord did not reach the other bank of the sea, or of the Jordan, but they went to the nearest places of the same country, where the people of those parts could come to them on foot.

Theophylact: So do thou not wait for Christ till He Himself call you, but outrun Him, and come before Him.

There follows: “And Jesus when He came out saw many people, and was moved with compassion towards them, because they were as sheep having no shepherd.”

The Pharisees being ravening wolves did not feed the sheep, but devoured them; for which reason they gather themselves to Christ, the true Shepherd, who gave them spiritual food, that is, the word of God.

Wherefore it goes on: “And He began to teach them many things.”

For seeing that those who followed Him on account of His miracles were tired from the length of the way, He pitied them, and wished to satisfy their wish by teaching them.

Bede, in Marc., 2, 26: Matthew says that He healed their sick, for the real way of pitying the poor is to open to them the way of truth by teaching them, and to take away their bodily pains.

Pseudo-Jerome: Mystically, however, the Lord took apart those whom He chose, that though living amongst evil men, they might not apply their minds to evil things, as Lot in Sodom, Job in the land of Uz, and Obadiah in the house of Ahab.

Bede, in Marc., 2, 25: Leaving also Judaea, the holy preachers, in the desert of the Church, overwhelmed by the burden of their tribulations amongst the Jews, obtained rest by the imparting of the grace of faith to the Gentiles.

Pseudo-Jerome: Little indeed is the rest of the saints here on earth, long is their labour, but afterwards, they are bidden to rest from their labours. But as in the ark of Noah, the animals that were within were sent forth, and they that were without rushed in, so is it in the Church, Judas went, the thief came to Christ. But as long as men go back from the faith, the Church can have no refuge from grief; for Rachel weeping for her children would not be comforted. Moreover, this world is not the banquet, in which the new wine is drank, when the new song will be sung by men made anew, when this mortal shall have put on immortality.

Bede, in Marc., 2, 26: But when Christ [p. 121] goes to the deserts of the Gentiles, many bands of the faithful leaving the walls of their cities, that is their old manner of living, follow Him.

35. And when the day was now far spent, His disciples came unto Him, and said, “This is a desert place, and now the time is far passed:

36. Send them away, that they may go into the country round about, and into the villages, and buy themselves bread: for they have nothing to eat.”

37. He answered and said unto them, “Give ye them to eat.” And they said unto Him, “Shall we go and buy two hundred pennyworth of bread, and give them to eat?”

38. He saith unto them, “How many loaves have ye? go and see.” And when they knew, they say, “Five, and two fishes.”

39. And He commanded them to make all sit down by companies upon the green grass.

40. And they sat down in ranks, by hundreds, and by fifties.

41. And when He had taken the five loaves and the two fishes, He looked up to heaven, and blessed, and brake the loaves, and gave them to His disciples to set before them; and the two fishes divided He among them all.

42. And they did all eat, and were filled.

43. And they took up twelve baskets full of the fragments, and of the fishes.

44. And they that did eat of the loaves were about five thousand men.

Theophylact: The Lord, placing before them, first, what is most profitable, that is, the food of the word of God, afterwards also gave the multitude food for their bodies; in beginning to relate which, the Evangelist say, “And when the [p. 122] day was now far spent, His disciples came unto Him, and said, This is a desert place.

Bede: The time being far spent, points out that it was evening. Wherefore Luke says, “But the day had begun to decline.”

Theophylact: See now, how those who are disciples of Christ grow in love to man, for they pity the multitudes, and come to Christ to intercede for them. But the Lord tried them, to see whether they would know that His power was great enough to feed them.

Wherefore it goes on: “He answered and said unto them, Give ye them to eat.”

Bede: By these words He calls on His Apostles, to break bread for the people, that they might be able to testify that they had no bread, and thus the greatness of the miracle might become more known.

Theophylact: But the disciples thought that He did not know what was necessary for the feeding of so large a multitude, for their answer shews that they were troubled.

For it goes on, “And they said unto Him, Let us go and buy two hundred pennyworth of bread, and give them to eat.”

Augustine, de Con. Evan., 2, 46: This in the Gospel of John is the answer to Philip, but Mark gives it as the answer of the disciples, wishing it to be understood that Philip made this answer as a mouthpiece of the others; although he might put the plural number for the singular, as is usual.

It goes on: “And He saith unto them, How many loaves have ye? go and see.”

The other Evangelists pass over this being done by the Lord.

It goes on: “And when they knew, they say, “Five, and two fishes.”

This, which was suggested by Andrew, as we learn from John, the other Evangelists, using the plural for the singular, have put into the mouth of the disciples.

It goes on, “And He commanded them to make all sit down by companies upon the green grass, and they sat down in ranks by hundreds and by fifties.”

But we need not be perplexed, though Luke says that they were ordered to sit down by fifties, and Mark by hundreds and fifties, for one has mentioned a part, the other the whole. Mark, who mentions the hundreds, fills up what the other has left out.

Theophylact: We are given to understand that they lay down in parties, separate from one another, for what is translated by companies, is repeated twice over in the Greek, as though it were by companies and companies.

It goes on, “And when He had taken the five loaves and the [p. 123] two fishes, He looked up to heaven, and blessed, and broke the loaves, and gave them to His disciples to set before them: and the two fishes divided He among them all.”

Chrys., Vict. Ant. e Cat. in Marc., see Hom. in Matt., 49: Now it was with fitness that He looked up to heaven, for the Jews, when receiving manna in the desert, presumed to say of God, “Can he give bread?” [Ps 78:20] To prevent this, therefore, before He performed the miracle, He referred to His Father when He was about to do.

Theophylact: He also looks up to heaven, that He may teach us to seek our food from God, and not from the devil, as they do who unjustly feed on other men’s labours. By this also He intimated to the crowd, that He could not be opposed to God, since He called upon God. And He gives the bread to His disciples to set before the multitude, that by handling the bread, they might see that it was an undoubted miracle.

It goes on: “And they did all eat, and were filled: and they took up twelve baskets full of the fragments.”

Twelve baskets of fragments remained over and above, that each of the Apostles, carrying a basket on his shoulder, might recognise the unspeakable wonder of the miracle. For it was a proof of overflowing power not only to feed so many men, but also to leave such a superabundance of fragments. Even though Moses gave manna, yet what was given to each was measured by his necessity, and what was over and above was overrun with worms. Elias also fed the woman, but gave her just what was enough for her; but Jesus, being the Lord, makes His gifts with superabundant profusion.

Bede: Again, in a mystical sense, the Saviour refreshes the hungry crowds at the day’s decline, because, either now that the end of the world approaches, or now that the Son of justice has set in death for us, we are saved from wasting away in spiritual hunger. He calls the Apostles to Him at the breaking of bread, intimating that daily by them our hungry souls are fed, that is, by their letters and examples. By the five loaves are figured the Five Books of Moses, by the two fishes, the Psalms and Prophets.

Theophylact: Or the two fishes are the discourses of fishermen, that is, their Epistles and Gospel.

Bede: [ed. note: The same application to the five senses is found in Origen in Matt. 14, 17, and St. Ambrose in Luc., 6, 80. The latter, probably, was the source from which Bede borrowed it, as in both it forms a portion of a comparison between this miracle and that of the four thousand being fed with seven loaves, in which the latter are said to be a type of the Christian, who has given up external things. Origen, Hom. 3 in Leviticus lays it down as a principle, that the number five is almost always taken for the five sense in Scripture.] There are five senses in the outward man [p. 124] which shews that by the five thousand men are meant those who, living in the world, know how to make a good use of external things.

Greg., Mor. 16, 55: The different ranks in which those who ate lie down, mark out the divers churches which make up the one Catholic. [ed. note: The number fifty is connected with rest from sin, or remission, with an allusion to the Jubilee and to Pentecost by Origen in Matt. Tom. xi. 3, and by St. Ambrose Ap. David 8. On number a hundred, as the recognized symbol of perfection, see Benedictine Note] But the Jubilee rest is contained in the mystery of the number fifty, and fifty must be doubled before it reaches up to a hundred. As then the first step is to rest from doing evil, that afterwards the soul may rest more fully from evil thoughts, some lie down in parties of fifty, others of a hundred.

Bede: Again, those men lie down on grass and are fed by the food of the Lord, who have trodden under foot their concupiscences by continence, and apply themselves diligently to hear and fulfil the words of God. [ed. note: see Aurea Catena in Matthew, p. 537] The Saviour, however, does not create a new sort of food; for when He came in the flesh He preached no other things than were predicted, but shewed how pregnant with mysteries of grace were the writings of the Law and the Prophets.

He looks up to heaven, that He may teach us that there we must look for grace. He breaks and distributes to the disciples that they may place the bread before the multitudes, because He has opened the mysteries of prophecy to holy doctors, who are to preach them to the whole world. What is left by the crowd is taken up by the disciples, because the more sacred mysteries, which cannot be received by the foolish, are not to be passed by with negligence, but to be inquired into by the perfect. For by the twelve baskets, the Apostles and the following Doctors are typified, externally indeed despised by men, but inwardly full of healthful food. For all know that carrying baskets is a part of the work of slaves.

Pseudo-Jerome: Or, in the gathering of the twelve baskets full of fragments, is signified the time, when they shall sit on thrones, judging all who are left of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, the twelve tribes of Israel, when the remnant of Israel shall be saved.