#c: leena gaspari

[janeysharkrps]

☁

“Touch me, taste me, tell me I’m not fading Tell me that I look just like a man” — “Chucky Vs. The Giant Tortoise” by Dance Gavin Dance

Leena could see the loneliness in his eyes even as he smiled at her from across the small table in her kitchen. Orion could never hide his emotions. It had always made him a wonderful partner and a terrible poker player. But knowing the look made her heart sink. She was doing this to him. For him, no time had passed.She hadn’t been out of his life for four years, he hadn’t had to grieve her and attempt to pick up the pieces of his shattered life. She had gone through all of that and so much more in the four years he’d been dead. And they still had no idea how he suddenly… wasn’t, anymore. 

But seeing that look in his eyes made her realize something. Even through that distrust in his being here, the fear that he would be gone, and the way she shied away from his touch at times because she was scared his hand would go through her and she’d have to admit he was a delusion of her broken mind, Leena had that bigger pull to wash the loneliness from his eyes and heart. She set down her fork and stood up suddenly, Orion’s head jerking up to follow her movements, confusion evident on his face. He might have been a ghost or a delusion, but fuck, he was here and she could feel him when he did touch her so she was just going to let her heart do the leading tonight, her head be damned. She stepped around the table and Orion pushed his seat back ready to stand too, sure something was wrong as he clearly mistook her determined expression for something else. She put her hand on his shoulder to stop him from rising and sat down in his lap, her legs straddling him, her feet not even reaching the ground. 

He started to speak but she put her finger on his lips and studied his face. That beautiful face that had lit up her world, and haunted her dreams when he’d gone from it. That face that wasn’t aged in just four years like her’s was. He the boy who’d helped teach her to swim, her first kiss, her prom date, her first… everything. He was still him and that knowledge was what had her dropping her finger only to place her lips on his, soft at first, testing. Instantly her body reacted to the touch, muscle memory waking and causing her arms to hook around his neck as his hands slid up her thighs, his lips responding tentatively at first, before becoming more rushed, far more hungry than she’d thought he’d be. But she didn’t mind one bit because her heart pounded in her ears and a soft moan escaped her as her body pressed into his, yearning for him after being starved of his touch for so long. 

He didn’t say anything as he pulled back to look at her, his eyes dancing with that dangerous heat that had always caused her entire lower half to hum with anticipation. His hands slid back to cup her rear as he stood, holding her in place against him as if she weighed nothing, causing another wave of delight to crash through her. Orion kissed her hungrily and Leena gave that same hunger back to him. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he moved from the kitchen. He didn’t know this house as well as their old place, so their trip to the bedroom was halted as he stopped every couple of steps to break the kiss and check he wasn’t about to crash into a wall. Eventually he made it up the stairs and into her room as he sat on the edge of her bed, still holding her in his lap. Leena broke from the kiss and pushed him down, his back hitting the bed as she sat over him, looking down into those lust filled eyes. She didn’t know why he was back, but she knew she would do anything to keep that loneliness out of his expression.

[janeyrps]

[jaifkncourtney]

Leena: Was there ever a point in your life that you thought about ending it in an attempt to see Orion again or did you think that you'd be able to keep going, make a new life, and eventually move on?

“Every day for the first year... then every week, every month... it took people looking out for me and knowing Cody needed me to keep me from giving in. To lose a part of you like that, there are no words to describe the agony that each day without them brings. I never wanted to move on, or start a new life. I held on to as much as I could for as long as I could before I was forced out of my old life by the anguish. Now that person is back, and I can’t figure out how to erase or forget all that pain. I still feel that gaping hole in my heart. Someone coming back doesn’t magically fix you... even though I was hoping it would.”

[janeysharkrps]

"I cross my heart and hope to die"

It was such an innocent comment, something he'd said countless times before, but the words cut through her instantly. Leena felt herself flinch at the last words of his promise and she could see in his eyes he'd realized where he'd gone wrong. Orion had come back to her. Be some insane miracle he'd come back from the dead, no older than the day they put him in the ground. He'd died and by the power of whatever god was out there, he'd come back, unchanged and beautiful as ever. 

No, the only person who had changed was Leena. Broken, fragile, on the edge Leena. She was the one who'd lost her mind in the grief of losing the man she'd loved, almost lost her life in a desire to join him. Lost that spark that made her who he'd fallen in love with. She knew she was different, scarred so much deeper than the surface that anyone could see. Her heart was wrapped in barbed wire, so easily made to bleed if so much as touched. 

She saw him open his mouth to apologize, to take back his words and she put a finger too his lips to stop him, giving him a weak smile and shaking her head. She didn't want him to change. She needed him to be who he was, like somehow that would bring back to life, the girl who died with him that day. "If the next words out of your mouth aren't 'stick a needle in my eye', I'm not listening." She moved her finger as her hand rested on his cheek, still shocked that he was solid beneath her touch. She leaned in and kissed him softly, ignoring the pain as her heart, still wrapped in barbed wire, pounded faster for him.

[janeyrps]

Brit Sheridan [X]

[janeyrps]

[janeyrps]

RP OTPs — 13/?? [in no particular order] ↳ 'Til Death Do Us Part (Leena/Orion) with @stardustion

"We've come a long way from where we began Oh, I'll tell you all about it when I see you again"

[jaifkncourtney]

There's some folks we know They say, "Hello" I miss you so, Wish you were here 

[jaifkncourtney]

"I feel like I can't breath when I think of you hating me." | "I need you."

“I feel like I can’t breath when I think of you hating me.”

“I could never hate you. You didn’t leave me on purpose, I know that. I know that.” She rubbed his shoulder as he laid his head in her lap, both of them exhausted by the fame that his resurrection had caused. There wasn’t a moment of peace and while she’d grown to hate that, she didn’t hate Orion. Leena tried to sooth his anxiety in vain, when her’s was ramped up to ten.

At least in the solitude of their home, they were free to be themselves. The house that was once a prison for him was now their safe haven, a little ironic when she thought about it. “I could never hate you,” she said again. “I love you too damn much.”

“I need you.”

Finally. After so long of her pushing him away, Sienna was finally letting those walls down. She was finally admitting that she wasn’t the biggest and baddest of all and that she needed his help. How many times had she left the house only to come back when she’d cooled down? How many times had she threatened him, telling him she didn’t need him to survive? Too many damn times. 

Adam wanted to say something comforting like he’d be there for her, that he’d help her, that he’d keep her safe. But the words stuck on his tongue. It was too intimate for them. Too open. So instead he gave a small shrug and simply replied with, “I know.”

[jaifkncourtney]

MT - 'til death do us part

“There’s no yellow brick road to follow back from this disaster”- No Place Like Home

The world had faded to a dim dark grey and Leena couldn’t seem to find it strange. It fit. On this raining Sunday afternoon surrounded by all the people that loved Orion as they lowered him into the ground, she couldn’t see how the world would do anything besides dim. She’d cried and threw their belongings until she’d been sedated, hell, she was still sedated as silent tears rolled down her cheeks. Cody whimpered at her side, and she couldn’t decide if it was because of the leash around his neck making him feel stuck in this sad spot or if he understood that “Dad” was never coming home.

The thought brought new tears to her eyes as the people around waited for her to throw a handful of dirt onto the casket after his parents had. She went through the motions, standing under the umbrella until the crowd had eventually left. She stayed in her spot as the cemetery workers filled in the grave the rest of the way, and she stayed when the sun began to set even behind the rain clouds.

She let the umbrella fall as she stared at the fresh grave. “Part of me wishes I was there next to you,” Leena said softly, offering an apologetic look to Cody when he looked up at her. “But someone has to stay for Cody right?” This seemed to appease the animal as he settled into a laying position next to the grave. “How do I live without you, Orion? What reason is there left?” The tears still flowed long after she was sure she was too dehydrated to cry anymore. Would she ever stop crying? Probably not. There were only tears for the lost love, for the lost future, for the loss of the man who had been her everything. 

“I don’t know how to do this without you, babe.” She sank down onto the wet grass, feeling the cold rain seep into the bottom of her black dress. “I don’t know how to wake up in a world where you’re gone.” She looked up and saw him standing there, across three rows of headstones, smiling like he’d just pulled the perfect prank. “Orion?!” The name came out in a rush of fear and excitement. Cody sat up quickly looking around, giving another whine.  But with a blink, the love of her life was gone and in his place was a stranger paying his respects to another that lay there. She didn’t know it was the start of her delusions. She didn’t know that was the beginning of her end. Anything just to see Orion again.

[jaifkncourtney]

A D (A) M / J A X / L E (E) N A

A - P.E. Adam has always been fit and liked being able to get out there and be active but he also loved History.D - He doesn’t. No reaction to flirting at all... unless it’s Sienna, then he is taken aback for a few moments before accidentally flirting back.A M - Adam has no favorite dessert. He eats when he needs to and rarely has sweets.

—

J - LOOOOOL What sense of humor? He finds his pack funny and used to laugh with Reagan but now he barely smiles.A - History and English were his faves.X - It’s not petty but his secret is that he bit Reagan to save her life and he can never tell her.

—

L - She loves Takenoko and used to have long nights of it with Orion and their group of friends.E - Leena is great with kids and loves reading Wednesdays at the library. She used to hope for some of her own before Orion died.EN - She usually makes scrambled eggs and toast, but if she’s running late it’s just toast.A - English, though she used to ditch a lot with Orion to go park somewhere and make out for most of high school. It’s amazing they graduated at all!

[jaifkncourtney]

“Shh– No, no, don’t panic, love. You’re safe now.”“It was so real! I swear! He/she was here!”“I don’t ever want to sleep again. What if– what if I dream about that again?”

“Shh– No, no, don’t panic, love. You’re safe now.”

Leena couldn’t stop the shaking as she reached for Orion in the dark. The nightmares hadn’t stopped, in fact, they scared her more than ever now that he was back. Losing him once and waking up to deal with it was one thing. But nightmares about losing him again was almost crippling. She cried onto his bare chest until his soothing voice had the nightmare almost forgotten. Who could care about a stupid dream as she felt his lean muscle below he fingertips. “I’m okay, now. I promise.” She laid back down waiting to feel the weight of his arm over her, knowing that one day the nightmares would stop and she’d be able to sleep through the night. 

“It was so real! I swear! He was here!”

“I checked the house already. No one was here, not before, and not now. I know, Sienna… I know he gets in your head, and we’re gone now but he stays with you, in your mind… I know more than anyone else. But John wasn’t here. He doesn’t exactly sneak around either.” Adam sat on the bed, “Look, I know you don’t want to admit this, but he gets to us all. He got to you. It’s okay… it makes you strong when you admit that he is the fucking devil.” He pulled her close, “I’m sorry I got you involved with him in the first place. I’ll never forgive myself for that.” He raised he gun he’d had with him. “If he does show up though… we’ll handle it.”

“I don’t ever want to sleep again. What if– what if I dream about that again?”

Jax couldn’t save her from the dreams. She’d seen too much since this war with the mutts started and he couldn’t protect her from her own memories. He couldn’t fight the demons inside her. All he could do was be here for her now. He climbed into the bed and pulled Reagan close. “If you dream about it again, I’m here. I’m not leaving even if you tell me to get out. Sleep, and know that I’m right here and nothing, I mean nothing can touch you.” I love you. The last words were in his head but he knew she understood. It was a protective love and a promise that no matter what he’d be there not in front of her, but beside her to fight anything that threatened her. Even sleep.

[jaifkncourtney]

“I’m not going anywhere.”

Leena tried to keep her breathing calm and her eyes from looking down. Orion didn’t understand how those words meant so little when she knew he couldn’t control it. He couldn’t prevent his death the first time, and they still had no idea how or why he’d come back. He could simply vanish into thin air one day, and he would be gone again, just like that. “Again,” she said tears springing to her eyes. “Not going anywhere… again.” Because if he was going to give her promises he couldn’t actually keep, at least they could sound as close to the truth as possible.

[jaifkncourtney]

BASICS

Full Name: Leena Gaspari

Nickname(s): Lee

Age: 24

Date of Birth: 02/21/1991

Zodiac Sign: Pisces

Place of Birth: Corvallis, OR

Current Location: Corvallis, OR

Nationality: American

Gender: Female

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual

Romantic Orientation: Heteroromantic

Religion: Christian

Occupation: Librarian

Language(s) Spoken: English

Accent: None

Residence: Two bedroom house

Transportation: 2012 Ford Escort

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

Face Claim: Brit Sheridan

Hair Color: Blond

Eye Color: Green

Height: 5’3”

Tattoos: None

Piercings: None

Distinguishing Characteristics: N/A

PERSONALITY

Positive Traits: Kind, Loyal, Compassionate

Negative Traits: Flaky, Distant, Untrusting

Goals/Desires: Before Orion’s death she wanted a family, after his death it was simply to live again.

Phobias: Snakes, Drowing, Fast Driving

Hobbies: Reading, Playing Guitar, Fishing

Quirks: Bites her thumb when nervous, Checks her seatbelt three times when getting in the car, bites her lip

Favorite Foods: Corn Dogs, Mashed Potatoes, Chicken fingers

Favorite Word: Wanderlust

Favorite Book: The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden by Jessica Sorensen

Likes: Rainy days, sleeping in, detective shows, reading, thunder, birds, celtic music, slow dancing in the dark, movie marathons, lazy days, pajamas.

Dislikes: Driving in the car with others, slick roads, lima beans, alfredo sauce, pork, movies with a sad ending, liars, fake people, talking in the theater, reckless drivers

FAMILY

Father: Dean Gaspari

Mother: Cheryl Gaspari

Sibling(s): Morgan Gaspari (older brother)

Extended: None 

Significant Other: Orion Casella

→  BIO | TAG | PLOT | SHIP | OPP | OPEN / CLOSED

[jaifkncourtney]

[X]

[jaifkncourtney]