#c: Vokunaku

[solautumn]

3. [ Hopeful ]

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”   ― Ralph Waldo Emerson  

Solarian’s future loomed closer, and it looked brighter than ever. It had been well over a year since he’d completed his apprenticeship with the Dalaran hospital and made his way to Zandalar as a researcher. Now, the war was over, and the whisperings of N’Zoth in his head had been quelled. The nightmares that occasionally haunted him were a scar that remained, but as someone who walked the fine lines between Light and Shadow, he was fully aware that they were not real. To know Light was to know Shadow, and the delicate balance would forever be tested between them. Most who knew him would say that Solarian wouldn’t hurt a fly-- and in fact was known for his healing!-- but he most certainly knew that shadow magic could bring a threat to its knees, should he be inclined to weaponize it.

Despite being of diminutive size physically, Solarian’s mind was ever growing with its doors and windows wide open to learning new things. He was certainly in his prime. The past year had been one of discovery and growth. Working as a volunteer researcher with the Reliquary granted him access to studies on ancient plants and lichen, as well as having first hand experience with new herbs catalogued from all across Zandalar from the muddy swamps of Nazmir to the arid deserts of Vol’dun and everything in between. With his alchemical studies taking off, and he found himself concocting new versions of old tried and true potions he’d learned to make in the past. Healing through natural means was easier for him than ever before.

Increasingly, he thought about how he would apply these findings to his own future. As the youngest of the Autumnsong brood, he was paving his way in ways his siblings hadn’t, and ways he was chided for from time to time, but was nevertheless supported. Part of the perks of being the youngest was getting away with having a little more leeway than his siblings had, and he took full advantage of it. Lately, he’d been traveling to Silvermoon City more often, both to run errands for his research team and to visit his family. It was nothing out of the ordinary for him until somehow, he began to meet new people he’d never really known before. Introducing himself to others made him feel seen. It was as if speaking his aspirations out loud set the wheels of possibility into motion.

The thoughts of opening up his own clinic had lingered in his mind since his days at Dalaran, but he’d never really given it serious thought until recently. When he voiced it, one of his new friends, Abel, was there to offer up an investment if he decided to open it.

Abel was different from most Sin’dorei Solarian had met in person. They were introduced through Taedalan, a very kind paladin who seemed to enjoy baking, and who seemed like one of the most supportive people Solarian had ever met. Abel was a mage, and yet he wasn’t like other mages. There was a beautiful, unfettered femininity to him that seemed to balance in harmony with his masculinity, and it made Solarian feel as though perhaps he could learn about himself through him. He wasn’t sure how to ask, or how to even broach the subject without feeling as though he were out of line. Oh to have that kind of confidence in being oneself! In a world where most men were broad, muscled, and armored, Solarian felt like a slender reed in the wind, invisible to those whom he felt attraction toward.

There was much still to learn, but the redhead and his boyfriend Maztheric were already offering up financial and emotional support that made Solarian feel less like a tumbleweed and more like a skyward fern, suddenly watered with the sweet downpour of support from people he barely knew. Even Sandellis had been there to express his support as well, and brought up the conversation they’d had just the night before about him guarding Solarian-- something that he’d gone to bed later thinking about in a blush, to be honest.

It seemed much like a busy night, and Rennsley the mule seemed to happily eat kiwi fruit from Vokunaku’s hand. The mage seemed a little eccentric at times, but weren’t all traveling magi that way? Solarian certainly liked him! Quietly, he beamed at the new friends that surrounded him. They seemed like a mixed bag of different and yet like-minded individuals whose paths seemed to cross more frequently these days, until time eventually pulled everyone off in different directions.

Once more, he was left with just the company of Sandellis, whom he’d only known for about a week’s time. They got along in ways Solarian hadn’t expected, and he looked forward to finding any excuse to be sent back into the city just to see him and the others again. As much as he tried not to think about the Illidari during the day, he often found himself wondering about where he was, what he was probably doing, and what he’d bring him the next time they met. It seemed to be a little ritual now for Solarian to bear gifts of fruit, or little vials of mana potions.

They were beginning to get to know one another a bit more through their unexpected friendship. Solarian hinted at the way that the Light and Shadow grappled in his mind from time to time, and in turn, he learned more of the other’s abilities as an Illidari. He also learned of San’s dislike of him having left without saying goodbye. Night after night, the two would linger around Silvermoon City, or venture out into the woods for a walk, not noticing as time flew past them.

Tonight, they ventured out because... well. Sandellis was admittedly smelling a bit ripe, and he needed to get dunked into a river as soon as possible. Solarian teased him a bit, though he certainly offered him his own soap to use. For once, it seemed as though the pharmacy that was his bag was being put to good use, and he happily laid back on the grass, watching the evergold leaves of Eversong’s canopy swaying above. That’s not to say he didn’t occasionally steal glances in the bathing Illidari’s direction, however.

Conversation drifted in and out between them as it always did, but this time, it seemed as though the bond they’d been unwittingly creating pulled them even closer. Sandellis had a certain magnetism that drew Solarian like a moth to the warmth of the other’s flame, and before he knew it, his slender hands were in that thick mane of raven locks. His fingers gently raked through it, detangling it and braiding half of it loosely. Solarian wanted to feel him, especially as his lips craved to feel the other’s. Boldness overtook him in a way it never really had before when he reached out to hold San’s face and turn it in his direction.

“May I kiss you?”

His heart pounded in his chest and in his red ears as he waited with bated breath for the other’s quiet reply. Solarian simply couldn’t take a kiss. He was much too disciplined. Sol had to ask and let his intention be known, lest he be rebuffed and rebuked for it. He didn’t want to ruin a perfectly good thing with a thoughtless act, after all. But it seemed as though Sandellis was of a like mind.

“Yes.”

Solarian felt his heart soaring when Sandellis pulled him into his lap. Their lips met in a soft, chaste kiss at first, but Solarian hungered for more. The more they kissed, the more his body reacted to it, and the less shy he felt about letting his lips explore the Illidari’s face until Sandellis paused them with a confession that seemed to be weighing deeply on his heart. It was a confession that was certainly unexpected, but not one that was at all as dreadful as Solarian had been imagining in his mind. San wasn’t leaving to go off on some Illidari adventure that flirted with danger, and he wasn’t secretly betrothed to someone else. His confession was still important, however, and Sol held his face tenderly, kissing him afterward. His body was different, an obvious fact upon first look, but San meant it in ways others could not see.

Solarian offered a warm smile and brought his fingers up to trail along the ridged horns that curved up menacingly, and he placed a gentle kiss beneath each of his eyes. “You weren’t born with horns or felfire eyes, either,” he said in acceptance of every part of him. He had quite a lot of feelings about the subject that suddenly made themselves known. Solarian didn’t reduce what made a man down to his reproductive organs. A man was so much more nuanced than that, and despite his own inexperience in the bedroom, he knew that his attraction to men was more than a base attraction to said parts.

They kissed again, this time holding one another tightly. The young priest didn’t want the moment between them to end, and he didn’t quite know what this meant for them going forward, but the one thing he knew was that despite his best efforts, he was growing quite fond of Sandellis. That night, he decided to stay at the Wayfarer’s Rest in Silvermoon City once more with him, rather than go all the way back to Zandalar and nurse portal sickness. Consequences of having to get up earlier than usual be damned! He wanted to fall asleep in the other’s strong embrace where he felt safe and happy for once.

Just as before, he would succumb to sleep mere moments after his head touched the pillow, but upon waking, he remembered to keep his promise not to simply leave without saying anything. This time, he gently roused Sandellis from sleep in the early hours of morning with hands that curved along the other’s beard gently and a sweet kiss to bid him farewell once more. It would be a few nights before he was to come back, but he promised to return, and even promised to bring him something new to try the next time they met.

Even though he couldn’t foresee what the future had in store for him in several fronts, Solarian had more reason than ever before to look forward to returning to Silvermoon City.

                                                                🌱🌱🌱