#c&c far older than the album. which by the way is not the same shade of green

[cocksley-and-catapult]

the color is too close to brat green for my liking. you’ll scare away the hoes girlie????

[writersshock-deactivated]

Nobody ever sends these asks so imma do ‘em all.

lets get personal.

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

Um, right now? I really don’t know... Probably Panic! at the Disco’s new Pray for the Wicked album. Eh,,, Dancing’s Not A Crime, Say Amen, High Hopes, Old Fashioned, and then a couple older one’s, maybe Don’t Threaten Me With A Good Time and Miss Jackson.

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

Jeremy. My crush from summer camp. Just to see him again instead of having to wait 10 months (that is if I can afford it when the time comes -- otherwise I may never see him again). So not exactly ‘meeting’, but.... Celebrity-wise, I don’t know. Perhaps Kamala Harris, a California politician.

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

“DNA is often too small to obtain reliable results.” (my forensic textbook)

4: What do you think about most?

I dunno... stuff.

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

[sleepy face emoji]

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

Usually underwear... it really depends whether or not I’m wearing a shirt.

7: What’s your strangest talent?

I don’t know... I can rap, which isn’t strange per say but it’s weird to me.

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

Girls are freaking amazing; Boys are freaking amazing too.

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

Yes, 2. The negative anon and the positive anon.

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

Last night, with my 1 year old sister, to Nirvana.

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

I’m afraid of fire. Like, touching fire or using an oven or working with boiling water.

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

No, I have never stuck a foreign object up my nose.

13: What’s your religion?

Atheist, but I have a lot of opinions about philosophy and faith.

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

Going inside. Or ‘playing’ with my brother.

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Behind! I love photography! Not photogenic at all though.

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

Well my favorite band song of all time is Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana, but they’re not my favorite band. I’d have to say Twenty One Pilots or Panic! at the Disco.

17: What was the last lie you told?

‘No, I have never stuck a foreign object up my nose.’

18: Do you believe in karma?

Not as a Universal phenomena. But yeah, what goes around comes around.

19: What does your URL mean?

Um, ‘writersblock’ was taken. Shocking, right? My main, ‘almondivory’ is more interesting. It’s for my best friend Amber and me, Ian. And her shade of foundation is almond. And mine is ivory. So it all worked out.

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

Greatest weakaness is probably laziness. Greatest strength? Passion.

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

Olivia Wilde, Jennifer Lawrence, Rihanna, Beyonce, Kristen Stewart, Penelope Cruz, and Michelle Pfeiffer are all contenders. Yeah, Tyler Joseph and Brendon Urie too.

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

Not since I was little.

23: How do you vent your anger?

Sulk. Listen to soft emo music.

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

Mental disorders.

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

Online.

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

Not yet.

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

I HATE nails on a chalkboard.

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

‘What if I was rich’? Or ‘what if i was hot’? Or, perhaps, ‘what if i was straight?’

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

No. And I think there’s a possibility of some form of life from elsewhere in the universe, but not mainstream aliens.

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

Saydon. My neighbor in class. He’s looking at me strangely now. On the left, a cheap “wall” (room divisor).

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

Not much. A hint of coffee.

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

I don’t know... most recently, my brother’s bathroom. It’s supposed to be ‘ours’ but I can’t stand it.

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

EAST COAST

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

Well, my biological sex is female, even though I am nonbinary. So I’ll go with a male singer (also because there are too many hot girls to choose from) ... Shawn Mendes. Or Tyler Joseph or Brendon Urie.

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

This is to complicated. It’s not that I don’t have opinions (i have many) but when i talk about this I talk for almost 2 hours and 40 minutes. Yes, I’ve been timed.

36: Define Art.

Creative expression.

37: Do you believe in luck?

Not really? I’m unsure what this means exactly.

38: What’s the weather like right now?

I’m in class, but when I got here it was clear and a little damp.

39: What time is it?

10:41am Tuesday October 30th

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

No. Too young (14). But yes. I was in a bad car crash summer 2017.

41: What was the last book you read?

Textbook: for my forensic anthropology class. Otherwise: Summer Reading by Hilma Wolitzer

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

Yes!

43: Do you have any nicknames?

By birth name is Fiona. Only one person in the world is allowed to call me Fifi. Otherwise, Ian, Ean, E.K, and E.L. (@scholarlypidgeot)

44: What was the last film you saw?

Not sure if it was Ocean’s 8 or Dangerous Minds.

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

Physical? Not sure.

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

Yeah, probably, but not for long. I raised caterpillars into butterflies onse.

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

No, I said, like a liar.

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

Demi-ace.

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

Yes. So many.

50: Do you believe in magic?

Not in the way you’re asking.

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

No, unfortunately. I forgive too easily and I keep going back to the same abusive friendship.

52: What is your astrological sign?

Virgo, I believe. Sept. 16.

53: Do you save money or spend it?

If it’s my own, save up. Somebody’s else? Spend.

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

2 coffees and a brownie. I’m healthy.

55: Love or lust?

Love.

56: In a relationship?

No.

57: How many relationships have you had?

1 (but liked 3 people).

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

Yes.

59: Where were you yesterday?

Home.

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

Yes. A couple of the flowers on my bag are pinkish-purple. My Ziploc bags have blue and pink strips. My jacket is galaxy-patterned and has a little pink in it. Otherwise, no.

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

Yes. Black with white stars, constellations, and cresecent moons. Mid-calf. Warm.

62: What’s your favourite animal?

Dolphin, elephant, owl, cat, or dog.

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

I ... don’t have one.

64: Where is your best friend?

About an hour away. She moved at the beginning of the month (had lived literally right across the road, like we could whisper to each other from each other’s yards.

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

@thethew​ @gottaenjoythelittlethingzz​ @blacktwittercomedy​ @badjokesbyjeff​ @writersupportgroup​

66: What is your heritage?

English, Scottish, Polish, German. I am a white boi/girl.

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

Sleeping, oddly.

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

Never thought about it.

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

It ... depends on your definition? Think it’s pretty safe to say no.

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

No.

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

Save the fucking dog!

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

a) Yes.

b) I honestly have no idea. Probably contact all my friends from summer camp and tell them how much I love them and the camp. And find Jeremy, my summer camp crush, and tell him that I liked him.

c) Yes.

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

Why?! I’d have to say trust. To not be trusted would drive me insane. And not being able to trust anyone would be awful. But love... I mean, I’d be terribly sad without it. :(

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

Donald MacGillavry by Silly Wizard.

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

8672 (home)

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

Trust, support, communication, and understanding.

77: How can I win your heart?

Stab me and remove it in a battle. Other than that? Love me.... <3

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

YES

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

No idea at all.

80: What size shoes do you wear?

8 or 9 Women’s (US)

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

“Age 117 years, 4 months, and 23 days -- she was happy.”

82: What is your favourite word?

Absolutely no idea. Maybe ‘l’eau’?

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

Red

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

“?”

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

Homemade Dynamite- REMIX

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

Bright yellow - Indigo is where they all are.

87: What is your current desktop picture?

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

I thought about this for a while. Nobody. Because everybody I hate, I’d want them to finally understand why I hate them rather than just exploding. They shouldn’t get to go that easy.

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

What’s the worst lie you ever told?

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Scream, throw my pillows at them, knock them all over, lock them in my bedroom, and sleep somewhere else.

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Well it was okra. Absolutely. No idea what power that gives me? The power to cook delicious food with little effort would be cool.

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

Dancing with Annie in 2015.

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

This thing ... I ... watched. On the internet.

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

Not into sex. I’m gonna interpret this as ‘making out with’. Hmm... maybe Halsey? Or Brendon Urie (assuming I was instantly a lot older). <3

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Scotland.

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

Not yet. My brother’s been close several times. Best friend’s cousin is in jail and her dad almost was (cousin for drug offenses and sexually harassing us, dad for verbally and physically abusing her).

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

Yes. I remember twice right now. Once when I was 7 or 8 in San Francisco. Once when I was 10 or 11 after eating really greasy Chinese food.

98: Ever been on a plane?

Yes. Maybe about 10-15 times?

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

“YEET”.

No, seriously, probably, “Right now everybody in the world knows who I am. And that terrifies me. Also, I’m in a library so I have to be quiet. Climate change is real.”

[cyn2k]

Prompt Fic: Shades of Future Past (Zimbits)

I’ve not posted anything original before, and I’ve never written fan fiction.  But I saw the below prompt posted by a friend (original prompt source), and this outline just begged to be written.  Of course, it just kept getting longer and longer.  I’ve left it in outline form, as I truly don’t have the skills to turn it into the monster it threatens to be.

Prompt:

Cleaning out your grandfather’s house after his death you’re going through boxes in his attic when you come across a box of photo albums labeled with your name.

You smile and begin to flip through them. Your smile fades, you don’t recognize many of the people. That is when you realize the dates are from ten to fifteen years into the future.

After the overdose and rehab, Jack returns to his parents’ house in Montreal.  He hasn’t lived there for more than a few months since his first billeting for Midgets years earlier.

He has no idea what he will do with his life.  Hockey is all he knows.

He starts seeing Dr. Turgeon twice a week. He doesn’t say much at first, but an anxiety attack in his 5th week of visits starts their discussions.  He does not talk about hockey or his father. He does talk about how alone he feels. He doesn’t talk about his lack of a future. He doesn’t talk about sex, or whatever that was with Kent.

Bob tries to get him to come to meetings with him (keeping him in view for when he’s ready to return to hockey), but Jack can’t see that far ahead.

Seven months in, one of his Peewee coaches contacts him about coaching some of the kids at his old rink.  He says he’ll think it over.

On his next therapy visit, he brings up hockey for the first time.

Jack’s grandfather died a year after the overdose.

Jack’s grandparents live in California.  All 3 of the Zimmermanns come for the funeral.

Grandma has decided the house is too big for her alone and wants to downsize to a senior community in Arizona, or maybe Florida.  Jack hopes she chooses Florida, as it’s closer to Montreal.

Alicia asks Jack to stay with her after the funeral to help clean out the house.  Bob has commitments and returns to Montreal.

Alicia’s brother and sister-in-law help out after work, but Jack does most of the heavy lifting.

California homes don’t have basements, which Jack finds odd.

They can and do have attics, though, and his grandparents had a lot of stuff.

Grandpa had a lot of WW2 memorabilia from his father’s family, including a number of diaries from both male relatives in the war effort, and female relatives involved in the workplace.  One of his great aunts worked at the Douglas Aircraft factory in Long Beach.

Jack takes one of the books on WWII history and spends the rest of his free time at his grandparents’ house reading all the books he can find in the collection.  Alicia arranges to have the books and diaries shipped home to Montreal, as Grandma and his cousins have no interest in them.  (He will later use 2 of the diaries as source material in his senior thesis.)

The box with Jack’s name on it is underneath a quilt Jack recognizes from a visit just before he entered the Q.  Jack smiles. They’d gone to Knott’s Berry Farm because his grandpa loved the restaurant there. It had been a good visit.

There are 3 photo albums in the box - one a deep red, one blue and gold, and one white.  He doesn’t remember his grandparents taking that many pictures.

Opening the red album, the first picture he sees is a pie. It looks good, but he’s never much cared about sweets. He turns the page.

The pages are filled with pictures of a group of men in front of a rather dilapidated looking house. Most of them are tall, but there’s a much shorter man right in the middle. He had big brown eyes. Jack thinks they look happy. He smiles and turns the page.

The same men, now joined by several women, including one of the shortest women Jack has ever seen, are now in front of a large building.  Jack thinks it’s probably an ice rink.

He takes another look at the last picture, and realizes one of the men looks like his father.  He looks again.  The man has blue eyes.  He is standing next to, and has his arms around, the short blond man he noticed before, and a man with a very bushy mustache.

He flips through several more pages. The group appear to be taking pictures at a college campus, and they look like good friends. The man who looks like his dad makes his skin feel shivery. His eyes are drawn, over and over, to the blond man, who isn’t always smiling.  Sometimes he looks like he’s scolding one of the others.

Jack’s heart hurts. He’s never had a group of friends like that. He puts the album down and picks up another one.

The blue and gold album has a logo on the front that he recognizes.

He opens the page to a Falconers hockey team photo on the ice. He doesn’t want to recognize the man in the #1 sweater with a C on the shoulder. He shivers.

He can’t deny that the next photo is himself - a promo shot of him in the same #1 sweater. He looks so old.  There’s a small scar on his chin, and maybe he’s broken his nose at least once.

The next several pages are game shots.  He glances at them, recognizing scrimmages and game shots with other teams. He does not see any that look like the Aces.

He turns the page, catches a glimpse of silver, and shuts the book quickly before he can swear whether he saw a certain large cup.

He puts the book back in the box, and takes several deep breaths before lifting out the white album.

On the first pages he sees have photos of himself with his parents.  Looking at his parents first, he thinks they look good.  He doesn’t recognize the dress his mother is wearing, but thinks they must have been tired, as they look older. He smiles.

He doesn’t recognize himself at first.  His hair is shorter than he’s ever remembered wearing it, and he looks like his dad.  The suit doesn’t look anything like his style. He flips the page.

The next set of pages features pictures of a smiling blond man with beautiful big brown eyes and a radiant smile, surrounded by what must be his parents.Jack recognizes the blond from the red album.

The next two pages hold pictures of a group of people, all featuring the blond man from the previous page. Many of them look like the men from the first album. There are only two women in any of the pictures - the short Asian woman from the red album, and an African-American woman who seems to be coaxing the others into place. Jack wonders why he’s not there.

Two of the pictures were taken when everyone seems to be laughing hard, except the blond man, who looks indignant. He turns the page.

His own face smiles back at him, along with the big eyes and wide smile of the blond man standing next to him.

While Jack-in-the-picture has a regular tie, the blond man wears a bow tie.  They are the same color, as are the suits they’re wearing. Jack’s smile fades. He turns the page.

Their parents have joined them in this picture.  Everyone is smiling. Their moms are wearing corsages.

Jack feels light-headed.  He shuts the album and places all 3 back in the box, carrying it downstairs.

He does not discuss the box with his mom, but decides to bring it home.

They finish clearing out the attic two days later.  Alicia and her mother have been researching real estate online. Grandma still leans towards Arizona, although she might stay in California to be closer to friends.

Alicia and Jack return to Montreal.   The WWII books and diaries he’d picked out appear on one of his shelves, replacing some of his hockey trophies.

Jack looks through the photos once more, avoiding a certain silver image in the Falconers album, before sealing the box and hiding it in the back of his closet.

He feels hopeful for the first time since waking up in the hospital.  Since long before that, really.

He contacts his Peewee coach and agrees to start helping out with the kids. Alicia and Bob are thrilled, but decide to say nothing.

Dr. Turgeon is the first person he talks to about Kent.  While his parents know he was with Kent, they’ve never talked about it. Progress is made.

A few months later, Jack talks to his parents about attending college.  He doesn’t let himself think about the box in the closet, but is pleased when his mom brings up Samwell as an option.

He mostly forgets about the box in the attic.

At Samwell, he chooses history as a major, with a focus on the 20th century and WWII. He joins the hockey team.

Two years later, when he first sets eyes on the small blond frog on the Haus tour, he can’t remember why he looks familiar. This irritates him.

The next three years pass.  Jack graduates and joins the Falconers.  He does not remember the box at all. He and Bitty come out to their friends and families.

Bitty graduates and moves to Providence, to no one’s surprise. Jack takes him to dinner and proposes 2 weeks later, also to no one’s surprise. They marry the next summer.

Bitty’s mom makes a photo album of the wedding.

Bitty keeps a photo and scrapbook of his time with the Falconers.  Jack notices, but doesn’t pay much attention.

In his fourth year with the Falconers, his first year with the C, the team goes all the way. Jack comes out on his Cup Day, which he spends in Montreal with his family and most of the SMH gang.

Jack is traded to the Schooners a year later. He leads his new team to the second round of the playoffs, but they are eliminated by the Sharks.  He is traded again, to the Habs.  Jack suspects his dad may have been involved.

Bitty isn’t thrilled about the paperwork for living in Canada, but does enjoy spending time with his in-laws while Jack is away.

Bitty’s working on his second cookbook, and Alicia has taken to making guest appearances on his vlog.  Bob makes occasional outrageous appearances, leading to the trending hashtags #badbobbakes.

They win the Stanley Cup two years later. Jack is 32 and starting to think about retirement. He doesn’t think too hard around the Cup, because you can’t take chances with Cup magic.

Jack and Bitty have a house and a dog, and perhaps the cat that keeps showing up for chicken that Bitty may slip her from time to time, and are thinking of starting a family. Suzanne and Alicia may be tag-teaming them.

They return to Samwell for Jack and Shitty’s 10-year reunion, after Jack’s second Cup win with the Habs. (He just might have had some thoughts about that). His Cup day is a week later, back in Montreal.

The SMH gang decide to throw their own reunion. They’ve rented a house, and Bitty bakes. The gang devours the first three like they’ve not seen pie in years. (As if Bitty would ever leave his friends pie-less.)

 Jack arranges with Lardo for a photographer friend of hers to come with them and take photos while they tour the campus and spend time together. Jack has his own camera, but knows that time with friends is more important than taking the right photo. The photographer gets his own pie.

The photographer sends him a digital file, but also sends Jack a photo album of the best shots. The album cover is red.

He opens the album to a photo of one of Bitty’s pies.  He turns the page.  There are Ransom and Holster, Shitty and Lardo, Chowder and Cait (no one calls her Farmer any more), Ford and Nursey and Dex, and Jack and Bitty in front of the Haus, which is looking even worse than when he’d lived there. And another of them in front of Faber.

And he remembers. He does not look any further.

He does, however, gather the wedding album, the Falconers album, and the reunion album, and places them in a box. After sealing the box, he asks Bitty to label the box with his name. It sits on the chair in their bedroom.

On Cup Day, he whispers his wish when no one is looking.

When Jack and Bitty get home, the box is gone.  He’ll pick it up the next time they go to visit his parents.

[rougedraconteur]

In one of your last posts about CC you said: "D met B in 2012 in London, showcased by an infamous series of tweets tracking an all night club crawl, lost weekend thing and literal actual orgy these two had with three women" This really happened or it's just a rumor?

The tweets from one of the women were out there at the time, and the intent was to present that first meeting as wild and epic, I think.  As we know, tweets and even photos can be staged. 

 One of the women was supposedly a London DJ, while two of the women were self-described as models and actress wanna be and artist types and close pals who were hanging out in a bar when they were picked up for a wild weekend of debauchery by the other three.  One, a slinky redhead, posted a series of tweets, with everyone’s twitters attached, including some hashtags that were pretty descriptive, including, IF I remember correctly, and I am old, honey, the actual word “orgy” and compared them to playboy mansion nights, saying ‘Lets do it again soon,” or something similar.

 Seems like there was some notion within fandom that the redhead was relentless, talkative, stalkery, and would be trouble.  Sounds a lot like someone he later got saddled with, but best I recall she was well-known to others in London as a local regular on the party scenes who wanted to make it big in show business, and would do whatever it took to make it happen, including trying to make her way to America.  I honestly can’t recall if we got photos or not, but this girl never seemed like a welcomed or sanctioned presence, only a dangerous and uncontrolled one.  It seemed like there was some talk for awhile that D had a dangerous obsession with her for a hot minute, and intervention was required.  It did set him up as a wild and reckless bad boy at the time they were tearing down gay rumors.  So there’s that. 

 D does, and has, made some strange trips (a Saudi Prince’s birthday with Whitney, Usher, and Mariah?) to old London town.  And Washington, D.C.  Japan.  Germany.  Exotic isles with wealthy publishers (Daman) and a soccer team, supposedly for a photo shoot and anniversary celebration.  Wonder what happed to those photos?  D on a beach with other gorgeous men in swimsuits?  Who wouldn’t publish that?  Somebody didn’t, after spending all that money.

 Sorry, I am rambling, which is what pretty pony D causes us all to do.  And he knows it.  But we did get Ben, for those who paid attention and remembered, and pretty much he kept popping up here and there very randomly after that.  D started mentioning him here and there as someone whose music and work he followed, making him more known to us, although he seemed to be well-known in Europe and in the industry.  

Funny, but there was a brunette, too, as the best friend of the redhead.  Maybe this group at iHeart, minus M at the moment, and minus the DJ, is the actual group we had then, shaded to look like something else. Maybe not.

 And since I wasn’t there myself, in the room with the sweaty bodies, I can’t swear that it happened, only that all the tempest in a British teapot happened at least online, and fandom was “aware and alert.” So, REAL real or PR real, it was one of the first with D and his new image, Ben and swinging London added in, we (fandom at the time) were all just learning about PR and the new team, and our focus was D himself. 

 Fandom at that time stretched to folks that were in Great Britain and Europe, too, Paris and nearly anywhere he could go, so it was peak time for D in several global hot spots, and there were eyes everywhere, real and, as we were to learn, paid for, as we witnessed and were part of the actual evolution of social media public relations teams take off,  with interest in Glee actors and their fans around the world.  We just didn’t always know what we were seeing, or who, at first, to trust.  

But we all shared, and learned pretty fast.  Some we thought were friends were PR, some became PR as they were “bought” into a new line of work.  Which usually lasted only as long as they were eventually exposed, then they were dumped.  

They won’t talk, and I don’t blame them, they don’t need to, but the only ones I trust totally are the members of the C and D online site, all good people, as far as I can see.  They were there before me, so I am sure they saw this, have better records, recall more details.  Not saying others aren’t, they are out there, just saying we have all learned better.  And I prefer being the outside agitator.

 I have always kept my distance a little, and am older than the universe (no, I am not M and D’s ‘relationship’), and just say what I need to say, for my own reasons. I sometimes feel the need to “change the story” that we are being fed, since I see what they are trying to do and herd us in a particular direction that normally feels unhealthy. 

 I like chaos theory much better, the truth shakes out usually at random, and out of desperation or necessity. I usually have an agenda, and don’t normally answer asks, so this is rare for me.  I hate bearding as a “profession,” lying as public relations, celebrity news as destroying the respectable institution of journalism (my field, and the decline is tragic and dangerous, imo), celebs leading fake lives to sell themselves to the sheep, as we have been trained to blindly attach ourselves to the stories that we are fed from celebrities in lieu of the truth we should be demanding from our leaders, and the venomous culture of Hollyweird that uses and abuses young artists to create and sell us an image of what the world is, when it clearly is not. 

 And I despise the predators, especially those that eat their own young, like Ryan, Brad, and the Fox crew, then try to whitewash themselves as good guys trying to save those poor young souls they preyed upon, lied to, used, manipulated, and abused, in order to protect the money and investments at all costs, not the actors. I don’t care if D is gay, or bi, or poly, or sleeps around, or sexes to advance his career, or never comes out. He won’t be any different, sadly, than hundreds of others, or perhaps thousands, in that respect.  The whole industry is a nightmare, and they should begin policing themselves and clean up their shit, before the public sees past the curtain of Oz and abandons them for something real.  Or the next sheep movement.  It could happen, don’t think it couldn’t.  I DO want him to find some healthier way of being in this toxic universe, and that includes his team.

 Back to Ben and the wild weekend.  D visited London pretty often after that.  Until he “bought a house!”. And then we got a few random photos of B and D hanging out in NYC while being filmed singing little songs together on the street, and Ben began popping up more in LA.  I suspect that after this album launch, and all the joint exposure they would receive, D will move on to another mentor, and another producer or director or showrunner for that next big artistic venture.  The house made it more convenient for Ben to work with D, and artists often form close relationships, even intimate ones,  with those they work closely with on personal projects or other artistic ventures.  Creatives (although they are certainly not all the same) famously break down walls that the average person would not, in the name of their art.  Or just for money.  Or they just like sex with pretty people.

I don’t like Ben. Many do.  I don’t mind if people don’t agree, this is a discussion, not walking in lock-step. He does have talent.   I call him used car Ben in my head.  He sells luxury, but he is a hitchhiker looking for that long-term limo.  And if he hangs with M, then that blows his whole classy persona, so there’s that.  And it does sort of indicate that D is running with a fast crowd, music wise.  For reference, go back to Rihanna and Kanye and who Ben has worked with, who would set him up with D as a live in producer, and there’s your answer.  Granted, D may not be there much, or very little.  But there is more to it than just M’s sweetie.

But if we get a great album from D, with real critiques and positive public reception thanks to Ben’s work, and it sets D on a new course, upward and onward to A list work, having paid his dues to rise up,  then he would have been at least more useful than the rest of that lot.  Just recall what happened to Kanye after that album, so be careful what you wish for.  We just have to hope that D is WAY more grounded in real life than his fake life seems to be.  But, fake or not, you have to play that shit out.  That means more front page tabloid fodder like all the rest of the crazies, unless you get established for talent, class, and smarts instead of just looks, sex appeal, and charisma.