#c!quackity slamming open the door of their broom closet to find c!awesamdream making out:

[cdroloisms]

fuck it i'm making this c!awesamdreamity sitcom AU (dr3 edition) a real thing for the funnies alone. why the hell not

premise: they get thrown into a sitcom. that's it. they're in a sitcom world that plays by sitcom rules, which means that everything that occurs Has to conceivably work within the genre. that means no throwing dream in a cell underground and treating him as a prisoner, sam, that's not funny enough. they can't leave or escape, and if they try to do something that Doesn't work within the genre they'll either just be completely unable to do it or they'll be foiled in some genre-specific way (ex: sam tries to build a cell on the property anyway and ends up in a three-episode arc about his fight with HOA)

the main point of this set up is that anything is technically possible as long as it works within the bit. also, yes, there's a laugh track, and whether or not the characters can hear it has everything to do with what's the funniest option (c!sam fucking hates the thing, for the record.)

highlights of this include:

the sitcom Demands A Relationship. because neither c!quackity nor c!sam is willing to do the whole married couple spiel with c!dream, that means that c!awesamq are the ones that are officially "together." this goes so fucking badly and is like, the primary reason why i'm making this a thing in the first place

c!dream isn't Allowed to be a prisoner, but he does have to stay within the house. between the genre and c!awesamq's opinions, he's not really going to end up as just "the roommate" or family or you know, an official third part of the throuple, so the maid it is

a level of violence is allowed but like, the actual pain/consequences has everything to do with whether it works For The Bit or For The Drama. like, c!q might hit c!dream with the car and nothing will happen bc it'll be played off as a punchline, for example, but also a dramatically timed fall might lead to someone walking around with a broken arm for an 'episode' or two. there's no magical accelerated healing here, just the Power Of The Bit

similarly, a lot will be allowed to slide as long as you're genre savvy about it. c!quackity won't be able to get away with outright torturing c!dream for hours, of course, but pushing him around is fine as long as it's funny enough. especially if it comes with a side of romantic drama

speaking of the romantic drama, hoo boy are c!awesamq a fucking TRAIN WRECK. like my god are they so toxic. c!sam is literally the quintessential asshole condescending boyfriend on that server and c!q has a quick fuse, a hell of a temper, and generally reacts to being talked down to with several knives and cursing. they take to a domestic romantic relationship as a fish does to . uh. lava maybe. like it's BAD

think screaming slammed doors things being thrown there's a glass sailing towards c!sam's head screaming over the banisters holes in the drywall fine! FINE! [laugh track] bad. it'd be gloriously, ridiculously toxic. the crowd goes wild

c!quackity has to contend with the fact that his husband is absolutely down horrendous FOR THEIR STUPID GODDAMN MAID .

the maid also wants his husband more than quackity :/ sidelined in his own relationship once again (i wonder why, Q)

how well they adjust has everything to do with how well they acclimate to the genre. c!quackity does the best job--he knows how to play a crowd and do so well. c!sam by FAR acclimates the worst. he's inherently completely offended by the idea of everything about his job and the prison being turned into Entertainment, into something Funny, into A Show To Consume and basically reacts to the sitcom thing by trying to ignore it. this, of course, means that he ends up generally being the butt of the joke

c!dream is. well. at least he's got less stress about dying i guess. and is generally a lot less injured bc starvation and torture lead to lower comedy ratings smh. is still kinda in hell but you know yesterday he got to watch c!quackity hit c!sam over the head with a frying pan and literal cartoon birds appeared so

honestly he's kinda quietly having an existential crisis and lowkey earning sympathy points from the proverbial audience by being the one that comes off the least as Just The Complete And Utter Worst

(meanwhile: c!sam is yelling at c!quackity for how he's apparently cut up all of his dress shirts while c!quackity screams back about something something and he can stick the scissors up his ass)

[laugh track]