#by thereoncewasagirlnamedjane

[writing-for-marvel]

“What if—what if he’s gone when I open my eyes?”  

Janie why must you hurt me like this 😣😣

“Promise?” He asks, sounding much smaller than he is.

My baby Steebie 🥺🥺 I just want to hold him

this could be a dream.

‣ pairing — steve rogers x gn!reader

‣ contents — drabble, post-ca:cw, angst, tiny bits of fluff if you squint, hurt/comfort, established relationship, tw: grief?

‣ summary — you find out why steve hasn’t been sleeping lately.

‣ word count — 513

✩ read on ao3 ✩ masterlist ✩ library blog

On the surface, it doesn’t seem like much has changed.

He walks into the safe house and people see their ever-dependable captain, his back straight and chin lifted, oozing authority and control even if he’s not technically captain anymore. 

But you see it—the dark circles, the slight drooping of his shoulders, the irritability, the pained rubbing of his temples when he thought no one was looking, and the off-by-a-millisecond slowed reaction times out in the field. 

He’s tired. Steve hasn’t been sleeping. 

It has been a hard couple of months; being on the run takes its toll, but there’s a hint of something else in his features you just can’t seem to place. 

When you gather the courage to ask him, he brushes you off. When you stand there, dejected, watching his retreating back with resignation and sadness, Steve turns towards you just before he steps out into the night. 

He offers you a sad smile, forced and unnatural, before promising you that everything is fine. For the first time, you don’t believe him. Steve has always been a terrible liar. 

When you tiptoe into his room late one night, you’re not at all surprised to find him on the floor. Sometimes he preferred it there, but this time you pause for a second.

Bucky is lying fast asleep just mere inches away, his metal arm curled under his head, his dark brown hair splayed out across a pillow.

You almost smile at the sight of the two recently reunited best friends sleeping on the floor like they’re two boys at a sleepover. 

Except Steve is awake. He looks too afraid to even blink, let alone sleep. 

He doesn’t acknowledge you until you’ve settled down on the floor quietly behind him. Your hand splays carefully over his shoulder, and then he’s leaning back against you. 

Bucky stirs, a sleepy sound escaping his lips, but doesn’t wake from what looks to be his first peaceful slumber in decades. 

Steve gasps softly, releasing a shuddering breath. 

Realization dawns. However improbable, someone he loves isn’t dead. Someone he loves has come back to life. Now that the chaos of it has died down a little, Steve needs some time to process that life-altering information. 

“This could be a dream,” he whispers, his eyes wide and terrified. 

“It’s not,” you whisper back. Heart wrenching, you lean down to wrap your arms around him, tears springing to your eyes when his tense shoulders begin to tremble.

“How do we know?”

“Sleep, Steve.”

“What if—what if he’s gone when I open my eyes?”  

“I’ll keep an eye on him for you,” you swear as you lean down to kiss his temple. Despite his fears, his eyelids begin to droop. 

“Promise?” He asks, sounding much smaller than he is.

“Promise.”

By the time you’ve finished speaking the word, Steve has finally drifted off, entrusting the personification of his very own heart into your two hands. You watch over them both until morning.

By sunrise, they are rested again.

And the sky is new.

fin.

don't forget to reblog/comment if you enjoyed this! <3

thereoncewasagirlnamedjane © 2024.

[candystevegrams]

Dear @thereoncewasagirlnamedjane

Happy Valentine’s Day lovely 💜

I saw this prompt for these candy grams and it got me thinking about your writing 🍬 What's your favourite piece of their art with Steve in it? 🍬

I feel like all my praise of your beautiful stories has been for your Bucky fics, but I love love love your characterisation of Steve so so much. This has got to be from such a long time ago, but your fractured fairytales series, specifically Just Like Magic, captured my heart beyond belief - I live for fairytales/Disney princesses, anything related to that realm, and your skinny!steve x eccentric princess!reader has always had my entire heart. The insecurity of skinny Steve and how he believed Bucky was the object of readers affection, but in reality it was him all along 😭 the set up and execution of everything related to the couple chapters I got to read of that story were so perfect, I still think about them to this day.

I have loved you and your blog since our very first interaction and it makes me so happy that you’re back on tumblr 💜

Love you always, Em xoxo

@thereoncewasagirlnamedjane You have a candygram! 🍬

[buckbuckbarnesstuff]

since the 2024 is ending, what are your favorite fics from this year? 🤗 (also the ones you've wrote too)

You're so lovely for asking me this, thank you so much!! ❤

These are some of my favorite fics I've read this year and still think about on occasion:

Treacherous by @scrumptious-delusion

A Night of Frights & Delights + Lines Crossed + The Biker's Tulip + Boulevard Confessions by @elixirfromthestars

Blurred Lines by @ellemj

Cold libraries create warmer hearts + second part by @elvenrin

A dish served cold + Me & the Devil + Smog & Spirits by @artficlly

Time after time + About that night (the bugs and the dirt) by @intrepidacious

Unsolved by @shurisneakers

Requiem + Of all the ways to die by @thereoncewasagirlnamedjane

◇◇◇◇

And as for my own I think it has to be Two with College!Athlete Bucky in a corn maze au. It’s actually the one fic where I immediately started writing after the idea popped up in my head and I managed to write it all in one sitting. I also enjoyed how my most recent fic turned out. Whumpcember (day 12). I've never written about something like this and it was actually really fun!

[intrepidacious]

🌴- CYM as your favourite fanfic tropes 👀

*cracks knuckles* alright let's do this

as you're about to be able to tell, i have a lot of favourite tropes 😌

you, my dear @targaryenvampireslayer, get monsters and cryptids (which includes vampires and werewolves and all that good stuff). it's a classic and i eat it up every time

@scrumptious-delusion your trope is fake dating because i still think about That Scene at the end of part three of the little bird series too often

@brandycranby you get fuck or die. it's incredibly fun. you're the only person i'm comfortable assigning this one to. there we go <3

@thereoncewasagirlnamedjane it's hurt/comfort for you 🥺 you're incredible at finding the right balance between fluff and angst

@aphrogeneias your trope is mutual pining. it's maybe my favourite trope of all time and you deserve nothing less

@barnesafterglow yours is arranged marriage because will i ever stop thinking about cosmic love? of course not

my dear @marvelettesassemblenow you get fix-it fics. the backbone of our society

@sanguineterrain your trope is "person a fell first / person b fell harder". i don't know how to shorten that but you know what i mean

@demxters you get time loops and i think you know why 💚 (it's your drabble requests. of course it is.)

@youremyfriend-youremymission it is enemies to lovers for you. the quintessential angsty starter pack

@levans44 your trope is childhood friends to lovers. another staple for a reason, i love this one so much

@nickfowlerrr yours is a royalty au because of your witcher fic that, i think, rewired my brain permanently i'm not joking

@krirebr you are the queen of slow burn so of course that's your trope

@fandoms-writings your trope is "there's just one bed". i'm giggling just thinking about that one

@wildlivelychild yours is friends with benefits. another classic that just slaps every time

@bubbly-moonwarrior you get the fairytale au. the vibes are vibing !!

last but certainly not least, @obsidianvibranium your trope is amnesia. underrated but beloved <3

thank you for joining the sleepover

[itistimeforusalltodecidewhoweare]

10 people i'd like to know better!

thank you for tagging me @barnesafterglow and @demxters ily both!!! 🥺💛

Last Song - would that i by hozier (i'm on a real wasteland baby trip lately)

Favourite Colour - sunshiney yellow <3

Last Book - just started these violent delights by chloe gong

Last Movie - ? ? ? honestly it's been a while, it might've been three wishes for cinderella

Last TV Show - the witcher

Sweet/Savoury/Spicy - yes

Relationship Status - so single i downloaded bumble (but haven't made a profile yet)

Last Thing I Googled - scrivener delete project

Looking Forward To - being DONE with my LIS degree !!!

Current Obsessions - fully been getting back into the witcher again. but also my planners. i adore my planners <3

no pressure tags!! @just-french-me-up @avisalix @levanswrites @catofthebarricades @fandoms-writings @youremyfriend-youremymission @thereoncewasagirlnamedjane @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @bigtreefest @sweetdreamsbuck

[elixirfromthestars]

Hiking Trip Date with Steve Rogers

I can see Steve saying something like I know a place and then he takes you on the absolute most beautiful, scenic hiking trip of your life. It's like a hidden gem amongst nature with something new to see at every corner. He's definitely prepared too, taking care of packing everything you would need for this little trip. Packing your favorite snacks and drinks to enjoy whenever you'd like. He's also dotting and caring the entire trip, making sure you're comfortable and having a good time. Never letting go of your hand to keep you close as you walk along the trail. The warmth your touch brings rivaling the warmth of the sun. He likes to make stops here and there to enjoy the view with you. Finding a spot to sit shoulder to shoulder to take in the beauty of nature. His hand in yours, your head resting on his shoulder, and the gentle noise of your voices joining in conversation mixing in with the sounds of nature. It's peacefully perfect.

This little date made me think of a question. What do you think would be more blue? The sky or Steve's eyes? 🤔💙 Thank you for sending this in for my sleepover @thereoncewasagirlnamedjane!! ♡♡♡

[hawthorne-bias]

@afortoru, @bitchy-bi-trash, @diremoone, @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory

@oswildin, @songsofadelaide, @stellar-solar-flare, @sukunasweetheart, @thereoncewasagirlnamedjane

THIS IS SO PRETTY, ISN'T IT? 😍😍✨

I didn’t realize you were the person who did the fanfiction tag drinks.

ahah yeah that's meeee!!

If you guys are interested they are all available as stickers on my RB!!

[candystevegrams]

dear @elvenrin,

happy valentine’s day!! do you know i always do a little happy dance whenever i see you leave a beautiful comment on one of my steve fics, or in my notifications at all?? i appreciate you so much, you know!! i’m so glad i met you and i hope your day is sugary sweet, just like you 😌

love, janie <3

@elvenrin You have a candygram! 🍬

[intrepidacious]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NIKA!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉

Let's party!!!

🌴 ohana means family

CYM as your favorite movies.

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

i am so so late to this aahhhh thank you so much kris 😭💛

once again i'm just going by vibes here and by order i remembered my own favourite films in lmao

your movie, dear @krirebr, is pirates of the caribbean: curse of the black pearl

@scrumptious-delusion you get pirates of the caribbean: dead man's chest (😏)

@brandycranby of course the movie you've seen so many times, knives out

@obsidianvibranium you get 27 dresses

@wildlivelychild yours is the little mermaid (1989)

@barnesafterglow your movie is the princess and the frog

@thereoncewasagirlnamedjane pride and prejudice and zombies for you (what can i say, it's my favourite p&p adaptation)

@idkitsem your movie is dirty dancing

@demxters my dear, it's the guernsey literary and potato peel pie society for you

@marvelettesassemblenow your movie is austenland

@persephoneceleste you get rebecca (1940)

@youremyfriend-youremymission of course, captain america: the winter soldier

@aphrogeneias you get ruby sparks

@fandoms-writings your movie is the sting

@sanguineterrain yours is mamma mia

@gxrlcinema you get dead poets society

@nickfowlerrr lilo and stitch for you

@navybrat817 you get the princess bride

@targaryenvampireslayer your movie is stardust

@treatbuckywkisses your movie is about time <3

thank you for joining the sleepover

[candystevegrams]

dear @writing-for-marvel,

happy valentine’s day, sweetheart! you were my first mutual ever on this hellsite and your enthusiastic support has always been such an anchor for me even during the toughest of times. all of your fics are amazing, but the way you write steve is 😩🤌🏻 the way you can go from tooth rotting fluff to scorching spice is just perfection, i swear! i hope you are showered with love today, you deserve every last bit of it.

love, janie <3

@writing-for-marvel You have a candygram! 🍬

[candystevegrams]

dear @hawthorne-bias,

your steve fics have made this game of thrones-like winter so warm and cozy, and i do this thing where i clap like an overexcited seal whenever i see you’ve posted something new. plus, your emoticon tags send me they are SO freaking cute (just like you!). happy valentine’s day!

love, janie <3

@hawthorne-bias You have a candygram! 🍬

[candystevegrams]

dear @intrepidacious

you listen to my writing woes, you share your beautiful writings with me, and you send me gifs of the actual loml steve to cheer me up whenever i’m going through a rough patch. i am grateful every single day i met you and you lighten up my life! happy valentine’s day, my love, i adore you so much!

love, janie <3

@intrepidacious You have a candygram! 🍬

[thereoncewasagirlnamedjane]

Hiya!

Did you write that Christmas fic about reader doing special things leading up to Christmas and somehow Bucky is always attending and then he gifts her a magnolia tree?

That fic has been living rent free in my head ever since I read it

hello there! <3

omg yes i did 🫣 that fic was the first thing i ever wrote back in 2021 or 2022 (i can’t remember now) and i’m still surprised people remember it / liked it so much 😭💕 brb while i cry

it’s called 12 days of christmas and is available for reading again exclusively on ao3

[hawthorne-bias]

@anika-ann, @bitchy-bi-trash, @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory, @stellar-solar-flare, @steviebbboi, @thereoncewasagirlnamedjane

Like he said: Captain’s orders.

[thereoncewasagirlnamedjane]

ｍａｒｖｅｌ ｍａｓｔｅｒｌｉｓｔ.

✩ main masterlist ✩ library blog

KEY: ♠️ angst | ❤️ fluff | ♣️ hurt/comfort | ♦️ mature ❊ favourite

✩ more than words ⋆ ♠️ ❤️ ❊ ⋆ completed miniseries ↳ writer!steve x librarian!reader, ao3 exclusive

✩ rabbit on the moon ⋆ ❤️ ⋆ oneshot ↳ asian-coded!reader, ao3 exclusive

✩ small worlds ⋆ ♠️ ❤️ ⋆ oneshot ↳ 1940s!steve; mild sexual content

✩ shenanigans ⋆ ❤️ ⋆ drabble ↳ xmas special, established relationship, implied spice

✩ this could be a dream ⋆ ♠️ ♣️ ⋆ drabble

✩ 12 days of christmas ⋆ ❤️ ⋆ completed series ↳ xmas/holiday special, ao3 exclusive

✩ ain’t life a peach? ⋆ ❤️ ⋆ completed series ↳ flufftober 2024, ao3 exclusive

✩ constellations of vital phenomena ⋆ ❤️ ♠️ ⋆ oneshot ↳ valentine’s day special; greek mythology elements

✩ of all the ways to die ⋆ ♠️ ❤️ ❊ ⋆ oneshot ↳ hades!bucky au, ao3 exclusive

✩ requiem ⋆ ♠️ ❊ ⋆ oneshot ↳ captain hook!bucky, peter pan au, ao3 exclusive

✩ timeless ⋆ ♠️ ❊ ⋆ oneshot ↳ time traveler!reader, ao3 exclusive

✩ what makes a woman ⋆ ❤️ ♣️ ♦️ ⋆ oneshot ↳ established relationship, ao3 exclusive

✩ this body is not mine ⋆ ♠️ ♣️ ⋆ oneshot ↳ self-destructive tendencies; minimal fluff

✩ some type of skin ⋆ ❤️ ⋆ ficlet ↳ for elixirfromthestars’s cinema writing challenge

© 2024-2025 by thereoncewasagirlnamedjane.

[thereoncewasagirlnamedjane]

ｍｉｓｃ. ｍａｓｔｅｒｌｉｓｔ.

✩ main masterlist ✩ library blog

KEY: ♠️ angst | ❤️ fluff | ♣️ hurt/comfort | ♦️ mature ❊ favourite

✩ all kinds of new ⋆ ❤️ ♠️ ♦️ ⋆ oneshot ↳ exiled princess!reader, hate to love, ao3 exclusive

© 2024 by thereoncewasagirlnamedjane.