#by acting like there is no issue in the age gap or using the mental age /maturity defense you are indirectly helping groomers

[av-potatogun]

i just realized part of my absolute discomfort w the five being given a relationship in s4 is that the fans of it remind me of every person who spoke out against adult men sexualizing emma watson as a child but defended or participated in doing the same thing to daniel radcliffe.

like it doesnt matter if you are saying the relstionship is good writing, it was still the writers waiting for aidan to be old enough to kiss a woman in her 30s. Beyond that, they used Ritu, they did not actually care about the idea of there being a compelling relationship between the two. They just desperately needed an older woman five would actually go for because they recognized that five wouldnt just date around.

and every person I have seen defending it are women who are currently the same age as the people defending the sexualization of young daniel radcliffe were. everyone ive seen has been old enough to be in Ritu's shoes in the relationship, and that worries me. You shouldnt be able to write off someone your age in a relationship w someone that young. Like kissing a 19 yr old in your 30s is predatory (in their case the writers were the predatory aspect). even if you have good suspensions of disbelief, thats still someone in his mid 20s with a 40 year old. as someone in their mid 20s, it would be super gross if a 40 year old approached me for a relationship. and as the older and more mature party, it is on the 40 year old to turn down that relationship if approached by someone so much younger.

anyone who argues that fives mind is much older, theyve proven that he did not actually spend that time growing up and learning proper socialization at all. Also i would like to point to how gross it is when its written that its fine that someone is dating a 12 year old cause theyre an immortal and have been around thousands of years.

physical age matters more than mental age and saying shit like 'theyre so much more mature then their age implies' is literally a tactic groomers use so by normalizing it for media, you are showing children that its a fine defense against such relationship gaps.

also ive seen people say that the cheating is the main issue with it and ??? thats the one issue that is addressed. like that is the one thing that they didnt play for laughs, they actually had contention about it.

[gh-0-stcup]

One thing that I really wish more people would acknowledge is that relationships can have weird power imbalances that may veer towards being predatory without it correlating to age.

Relationships between two consenting adults are fine. Age gaps are not inherently "wrong".

At the same time, there are definitely relationships people side eye. Where you can see there's something a little...off going on. Where the age difference may play a role in the power imbalance.

But I think focusing in on an arbitrary number of years is not the right way of going about dissecting the situation. Differences in mental or financial stability, confidence, and experience all play a huge role. While age is a part of that, it's only a small piece of the picture.

And when discussing predatory relationships between adults, honing in on age as the sole factor does a huge disservice to the issue.

reading a romance novel where the protagonist feels the need to stop and inform that audience that it's okay for her, a 27 year old, to hook up with a 31 year old because despite the age difference both of their brains are fully developed. the Discourse really has done incalculable damage.

[gladiatorcunt]

- JOYRIDE / VIII.

i drink the honey inside your hive

cw: kinktober prompt (daddy kink), southern florist president’s secret child!reader x secret service agent!toji, reader has a vagina, tits used to refer to your chest, age gap (toji is 47 and reader’s early-mid 20’s), dad bf type shit, willing to expand on this, hints of political intrigue and fictional plots, toji x your mom mention, implied and eventual betrayal (not of reader), typical politician behavior, parental neglect & it’s consequences, anal & lack of proper anal prep, dirty talk, light pet play, arguable one sided incest role play & possible actual incest, plus sized!reader, gun play mention, underlying mental health issues, mention of itafushi, flower language, dead dove do not eat

please do not repost, translate, or feed this work to ai

kinktober 2024

“There. After nearly breaking my back, the seeds are all planted, finally.”

You'd like to be buried under this magnolia tree, it would be a pretty funeral. Black outfits against the white backdrop of rare winter snow. You have big dreams for this sapling, clearly, as unassuming and drab as it appears freshly planted in the soil of your garden. The ones you’re mom took care of are all gone, maybe they got up and walked after her to somewhere on the horizon. If it doesn’t get so hot the state gets put under another burn ban next summer, this little thing should grow into a beautiful thing that obviously showcases how not depressed you are.

Could a depressed person cope with grief by growing a new life? Well, you wouldn’t know, coping isn’t on your to-do list for a long time if ever. What’s the point of getting better when you’re just going to feel bad again?

Whatever, you shake your head and head back into the shop, you have bills to pay and moping around won’t do anything to help with them. Since you live in a pretty small town, it’s a slow day like always. That is until a tough looking man steps in through the door, opening it and making the bell ding.

His loud sports car is still on and roaring outside, a bright yellow Alfa Romeo 4C.

The man notices your wandering eye and smirks, “You like it, doll? Didn’t take you for someone who’d be interested in cars.”

“Uh, yeah, it’s cool. Must have cost you a lot.”

“Nah. I bought it off one of my buddies at work, fixed it up myself. Well, me and my son’s boyfriend that is. You lookin’ to get somethin’ like that for yourself?”

You’re not really on the market for one, no, because it’s loud as hell and practically rumbling in your ear. You rub it off and ask him what he wants, forgetting some of your politeness, but this man doesn’t seem like he’d care if you spit in his face and kicked him in the balls.

“I’m not from around here.” He rasps and adjusts his sunglasses, leaning one heavy arm on the counter and cocking his hip out, “DC, actually. I’m lookin’ for somebody. You could call it confidential business.”

You hum and narrow your eyes, “Unless that confidential business involves a funeral or getting out of the doghouse with somebody, I can’t help you.”

Suddenly you remember your mother telling you about a big shot politician that knocked her up with you, how he hid you both away when she told him she was pregnant. Your mother was down on her luck 16 year old diner girl, and apparently the politician knew all too well how to use and discard her. The money was enough for your mom to give up her dreams and keep you in this town. When you’ve lived so long without what you think you should, you’re fine to obsessively make sure you never go without again.

He’s the president now anyway, even more reason to make sure you’re the bug that stays squashed under the rock.

The man with the mouth scar notices and decides to drop the act, sighing and taking out his gun. He doesn’t shoot you, just scratches underneath his chin with the puzzle and pointedly makes eye contact with you.

“Okay, let’s cut the shit. My name’s Toji Fushiguro, and I know that you’re who I'm after just as much as you know why i’m here, so why don’t ya just appreciate that y’r old man wants you back and come with me?”

You grit your teeth but you know there’s only one way this interaction is going to end is with you getting in the passenger seat of this nutjob’s car. He watches you shut everything off in the shop and leave a message for the only other employee, asking them to take over until you can come back. He’s a gigantic wolf, tall and silent in the corner, keeping his eyes constantly on his prey. Toji’s never let a bunny or prickly house cat out of his sight in his entire career, but in his current line of work it’s at least legal. Essentially.

“Pretty flowers ya got here.” He says, prolonging your unease. “Maybe his office could use some of these, dull ass beige box that it is.”

Your lips quirk up despite the awful situation, “Yeah I guess. The camellias are new, but hellebores are my favorites, I think. Not many people are into flowers this time of year, but I don’t have anything else to do.”

Toji nods, leading you out of the shop with a hand at the small of your back and oddly content to let you stress babble.

“I’m nowhere near good enough to do arrangements for the White House anyway, regardless of who’s sitting all cozy in it.” You spit and bite one of your nails, nipping at a piece of a hangnail. “Probably’d just throw some buttercups, yellow carnations, orange lillies on the floor, a bit of aconite in there too.”

You know that the agent corralling you into his car doesn’t have a damn clue what you’re talking about, but he seems at ease the more you relax into the leather car seat.

You make yourself fall asleep when he puts the car into drive and speeds down the street.

You’ve been in DC for about a week now, without ever actually meeting your dad of course but you’ve met plenty of his staff after Toji introduced you. He’s a secret service agent, who was given the special task of watching over the president’s only child, you can tell he’s not that happy about it.

Probably not as much action as there’d be in his usual position, you’re very willing to go with their plans of you laying low and staying inside most of the time. You’re still so confused, none of this makes any sense at all. You’ve lived your whole life without being involved in any of this but it’s only when your mother’s dead and your father can’t ignore you anymore that he wants to claim you?

It’s all another move in the game towards the re-election. At least he’s a better president than a father, but that’s not by much. Promises to address climate change and the country’s oil dependance getting pushed to the side, worsening class issues and trickle down economics, putting up more anti-homeless measures. You wish you felt like you could leave, but the tiny sliver of hope that by some weird miracle you could do something keeps you from being bold.

There’s nothing you could actually do anyway, you’re never going to be a part of the groups that their agendas support. You’ll always be the small town reject who saw meth addicts at the local gas station more than your own father.

You and Toji have gotten closer, by necessity and the sheer oddity of being polar opposites. You’re both equally as prickly though in different ways, birds of a molted feather. He’s there when you wake up, there during your mundane day, and there outside your door when you go to sleep. Even if you wouldn’t have liked your “bodyguard”, and you’re not sure you do, the distance between the two of you decreasing was inevitable.

He delivers you food, opens your jars, fixes the pipes in your penthouse, drives you everywhere you want to go in the city, carries your books for you in a bookstore, kneels down beside you in the dirt so he can help you with weeding out your garden, and keeps an itemized list of period supplies and your favorite things.

Your favorite minor holiday is national cherry day, he puts a reminder on his phone with the help of his son to always stop by the supermarket and get you some.

You feel like Whitney Houston right now, and if late at night you listen to her albums more than your mom did growing up, fantasizing about a 40+ year old man who treats you like a bug he has to keep alive, then no one has to know.

But no other man’s gonna do

So i’m saving all my love for you

You also think he’s going to assassinate your father. Sometimes you’ll hear hushed whispers late at night between Toji and someone on the phone, he’ll break protocol and leave you alone to duck into another person’s office and end up leaving with a grim look on his face.

You’ve seen the logs he keeps of your father’s whereabouts, which he should have anyway. Maybe it’s just wishful thinking, but you get the most awful storm in your gut when you see them under a gun that’s never been fired, like it has a special purpose.

You only speak to your father briefly, tense hellos and goodbyes exchanged over the bridge of a too tight handshake. You immediately expressed your distaste for being involved in his political career and he accepted that, letting you galavant on your merry way around town with his most dangerous agent. Ahead of Satoru Gojo, Suguru Geto, Nanami Kento, and Sukuna Ryomen, your father’s closest gaggle of hyenas.

You call them that because you could easily imagine drool dripping from their jowls if they felt so inclined to attack, to devour.

They give Toji their own versions of the same look when you pass them in the halls or they need to meet to give security updates, watching and waiting.

They only give you smiles, of every shape and size.

It’s easy to get a closer look at what your father does, the lives he ruins. Peace can only be an option for so long before other courses of action have to be considered. You don’t know Toji’s motives, this could just be another murder for hire paid for by one of your father’s political rivals. You doubt his heart is that deeply invested in those sorts of things, he’s made himself too apathetic, but you can tell that he still cared a little bit. He told you once that he’s had children who grew up starving before he got the job he has now.

They’re your age now, but he’d still do anything to keep it, to support them.

And then you think that maybe someone who’s only ever been abandoned knows what it’s like to hoard any good thing you can get your grubby hands on.

You give him own little bouquet of flowers one day, half because you’re going stir crazy as the weeks go by with Toji being all you know and half because you think you do want him to kill your father.

Purple Orchid.

Red Lily.

Red Anemone.

Gloriosa.

Red Delphinium.

Red Clematis.

Genista.

The next day, he’s barking at you to get packed for a stay at one of the out of the state safe houses. Don’t ask questions, protocol means you heed his warning and hop back in that canary yellow mid life crisis status symbol.

The tension was bound to be cut with a knife, the whole ride to the safe house is filled with sideways glances and slipknot blaring from the speakers. You have the same uneasy feeling that you do anytime Toji even hints at something being wrong, but something seems especially wrong this time. It’s not your job to worry about it though, and the older man tells you as much.

“Shut y’r trap, alright? You never have to get your panties in a twist when y’r with me, sorta.”

The safe house is as boring as expected, something out of a kindergartener's drawing. One story cube shaped, small roof, faded brown door.

You're only in the tiny kitchen for a second when Toji locks the door and comes to prop himself up on the counter, licking his scar.

He chuckles, “You’re a lot different than I thought you'd be, ya know that?

“I could say the same about you, I mean not really, but there are things I was surprised by.” You retort and sort through the cabinets, picking what cereal you’re going to stress eat tonight.

He comes around the counter and his hands slide from the tile to grip your waist.

“Yeah? Like what, doll?” Is cooed right in front of your mouth when Toji leans down.

You’re not immune to the proximity, your heart does a factory reset. “I never knew you could be so sweet, Toji.”

You’re not supposed to refer to him by his name, but you can’t let the word you secretly want to say slip out. You’d have to tell the employee back at your flower shop to be ready to claim the insurance policy on it after you go back and set yourself on fire.

But God, the miserable man looming over your bunny-tense figure really is sweet, distantly warm in the way a generally emotionally unavailable father is. But Toji’s the kind that would actually give you something to hold close to your heart over his long stretches of being absent until months go by and he tries to be better again.

You’re glad Sigmeund Freud isn’t an immortal vampire who would still be around to psychoanalyze you to shreds.

“Sweet to you maybe, ‘cause I have to be.”

“My dad couldn’t care less if you beat me silly.”

“I know.”

He never once said it was your father that compelled him to be as gentle with you as he is. A woman he met decades one, shacking up with an up and coming politician who he didn’t even try and pretend to be better then. They hooked up once and then he met his late wife, but months later the woman from his one night stand swore the baby in her belly wasn’t his. He never asked for a paternity test.

He never will, he’s already enough like your Daddy anyway, there’s no point in getting a confirmation or a denial to what his soul (and his cock) knows is good enough for a rat bastard like him.

You come out of your shame spiral as he splays one of his beefy gigantic hands out on the counter so you don’t get cold when he pushes your head down.

“I’d kill your old man if he kept me from this ass pussy, but it ain’t like he could if he tried.” Toji grunts, pendulous balls slapping your ass like a couple of grapefruits with every rough thrust in your puckered hole.

You gave up on being shy as soon as he clamped a hand around your throat to direct the first kiss you’d share. “Daddy- ngh, you’re gonna break me”.

His hand is so warm, your cheek squishes against the grooves and minor cracks in his skin as your head bobs forward. Despite you already being pressed down into the kitchen counter as much as humanly possible, Toji seems determined to force you to become one with it.

He gropes your thick ass cheeks, watching them bounce and jiggle as his burly hips slam against you continuously. Performance art in its truest form, whiney little baby pushing their hips back to take him even deeper in their fat ass. He didn’t have the means to properly prep you, just spit on his hand and massaged it into your already wet rim and called it a day. No condom either, but he can probably save the pussy job and it's obvious consequences until after your old man’s been made to lie face down in the dirt.

“I like the way your cunt sits under your squishy belly, ‘s pouting, baby. Both you and your pussy are clingy as fuck, huh?” He laughs deeply, reaching the hand that’s not under your face to smack your clit.

Your empty cunt gets wetter at the teasing, clenching around nothing because Toji likes to play pretend that he can be halfway considerate to the poor thing until he can’t. You want it too much right now, when you’re all loopy from his mean pounding in your ass is the moment he’ll regretfully have to pull himself out to sheath his hung length in your chubby pussy.

You moan, thought it gets precariously close to a wail the longer it goes on. “Daddyyyyyyy, oh fuck, shit- ‘m gonna tear.”

Your words end in a squeal of delight, your off the cuff rambling driving Toji to speed up his thrusts to piston his fat cock harder into your ass. Like he almost wants it to tear, your biological daddy gave you some nasty emotional scars, let your real one leave you with a couple physical ones. That’s what good daddies do, they take care of their babies and always give them something to remember them by when they won’t like their ancient relic of a father so much.

“Now don’t get mad at me, but- Oh, fuck- i was gonna kill ya, that was the plan. Take ya back, blow your brains out in front of your dad, make ‘im piss his pants because he knows he’s next.” He smiles knowingly when his hand on your clit feels it throb at his dark thinking-out-loud musings, wishing he could scrunch his fingers all up in your scalp and roughly pet you. “You like it like that, baby bunny? Daddy gets you gooey and syrupy sweet when he touches you, huh? Could just gobble you up whole, bones and all.”

Fuckin’ hell, you’re more precious than diamonds or gold or any loot he could’ve swiped from your old man’s crib. He’ll have to remember to slide his cock between your slick girls later, soap them up in the freestanding bathtub and spill his thick off white load all over them. You’ll lick up what you can but cleaning you up is obviously Daddy’s job, slurping up his own jizz like a wolf smoothing his rowdy pup’s fur down, nuzzling his nose in the valley of your tits and in the crook of your armpits.

“Daddy-” Your mouth gapes, little punched out ‘unh-unh-unh’s fly out of your mouth as your ass ripples. A few of your hairs stick to your forehead and you look over your shoulder, flushed and overwhelmed.

He just said he was going to kill you, you couldn’t even say when he changed his mind if he’s even telling the truth. But all you can focus on is that you really hope no other security personnel arrive at the safe house to check on you, whatever the fuck you’re doing definitely isn’t protocol.

Toji leans forward and scruffs the back of your neck with his canines, nipping the skin and leaving a mark as he slams his hips forward again. His grip on your love handles becomes iron clad and binding, wishing on a shooting star for bruises to form. He plunges in to the hilt with every thrust and gnaws at your sloped shoulder, he’s gonna cum and fill your cute little butt up. Pump your backdoor so full of cump it bulges and trickles down your trembling thighs.

You keen brokenly, floating up and away into his kiss. Which is basically more of an affectionate bite, but his tongue is mapping out your teeth and your cherry chapstick lips glide against his cold weather chapped ones. So it can be technically considered a kiss, but it leaves you reeling, someone just smashed a rock into your face and you’re collapsed on the ground unable to walk it off.

You try to squirm away from the earth shattering pleasure.

“What i’d say about givin’ me a chance, doll? Anyway, you were good as dead until I actually laid eyes on ya. Pretty thing, soft heart with a softer touch, ripe for the picking and left all alone…”

He can feel you getting close, you’re humping back against him like a bunny in heat as his thumb does a frenzied dance on your clit. He slides his big hand up your body to strum your nipples, his soft as a butterfly’s wing touch contrasting deliciously with his diabolically rough strokes.

In the fantasy he coos in your ear and asks if you agree that he did such a good job making this body, didn’t he? He twists his wrist on your pert bud, timing his ministrations with the upwards angled stroke of his cock. Your whimpering, his thick tip hitting the sensitive place you’ve never been able to reach with your fingers or your extra large toys.

“Fill me up, Daddy, please.” You beg, tears streaming down your face and sticking to his hand cushioning you. You turn your head the tiniest bit to wetly smack your lips together, kissing the rugged appendage. “It’s so hungry, I need it, give it up to me already. Not goin’ anywhere.”

Your cock-crazed eyes widen in panic whenever he acts like he’s gonna pull out, allowing you only the tip before grinning and sliding all the way home once again.

“Don’t worry, baby. I fixed it, didn't i? Got you all plugged up and owned doll, would sooner ride the muzzle of Shiu’s gun than kill ya now. Y’r soakin’ my balls so goddamn good.”

“Thank you, Daddy. Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you-“

Holy fuck, you can’t breathe. You can’t fucking breathe because how can you when all the air in your lungs is beaten out of you by some 47 year olds’s massive cock. The coarseness of his body is so right for you, abrasive where you’re soft and riddled with signs of being battleworn where your body’s only enemy is you. You feel split right down the middle and you’re half afraid that when Toji eventually pulls out, you’ll fall apart and actually become two bleeding halves of a whole fucked out person.

Your clit throbs at the mental image of his hairy swallowing the muzzle of a gun, Toji licks his lips and mercifully lets you reach behind yourself to claw at his rippling muscular glutes as he fucks you. Your ass squeezes his cock in a vice like grip as you shoot your load onto the pale wood laminated floor below. Your ass cheeks jiggle as your hips jump forward, grinding against the air as you get it all out. Riding that lightning off to who knows where.

“Jesus, oh, Jesus- You’re so fucking insane, Jesus Christ!”

At least Daddy will be there, because you’re certain you’re gonna crave keeping him inside and Toji seems like a terrible guy to try to do cockwarming with.

“Shit, baby bunny, this bouncy cottontail is gonna milk me dry, take me for all my money, isn’t that right honey bunny?” His voice is coated with sickenly toe curling condescension.

He roars a guttural groan, his nails forming crescent shaped indents in your hips as he pushes his cock as far as it can go and spurts his hot cum into your ass with a gruff grunt. He can feel your walls spasm around his dick, the sensation hurtles him further over the edge and his hips jerk and the joints begin to creak from the effort.

He’s not the wild and reckless young man who fucked your mother anymore, but you have him all wrong if you think he’s going to roughouse your shit any differently.

When you’ve both calmed down, his salt and pepper stubble gives you beard burn between the fleshy globes, punctuated by a breathless snicker and a barely there peck to your ass hole.

“Sleep in tomorrow, baby bunny” He says abruptly, his tone dropping to become startlingly serious. “I’ll bring back some breakfast for ya, give you a massage. I better come back and find your adorable ass right where I put it to bed, ya hear me?.”

“Yes, Daddy. ‘Said I wasn’t going anywhere.”

He pats your lower back, curling his thick digits around an invisible ball of fur.

[bugflies00]

sorry this is referencing a few month old post/s you made about the dream situation and a question you’d asked about dream stans, you can delete this msg if you want since it’s not as relevant anymore. Again I’m sorry if this is weird or you don’t gaf (that’s fair bc who does lol)

TW for grooming and dream being fucking gross. You can just scroll fast and delete if you don’t want to read or deal with this, I understand that

-

To preface Im about Tommy’s age now, when I was 15-17, used to be a huge dream stan, and I was very vocal about defending him online. —I was extremely parasocial and weird, and looking back on it I really regret how I acted.

So. Idk how much people who weren’t stans of his saw, but dream- as stupid as it sounds- was our friend.

He had bath calls with us, sleep calls with us, he told us in depth about his personal life and his health issues and his trauma and his moods and his habits and just basically everything. Most of his interactions with us was through his discord, and then someone in the fandom would stream his discord calls for people who weren’t there. A running joke was that dream had a parasocial relationship with us. there was absolutely no gap between creator and fan, he followed me more than once, he brought fans onto his discord streams and talked with them and he knew a good amount of us by name. He called us cute and talked about how much we all (as individuals) meant to him,

when drama happened he’d usually either do a space/call or go on his private and vent to us, there were I think two separate times he’d have full panic attacks over drama happening, and we’d have to talk him down. He also would, when responding to callouts or accusations, use arguments that his fans were making.

He did this during almost all his pitfalls, including the grooming allegations, his wording was often taken word for word from tweets by people I was friends with. I dropped him after the initial allegations, but for a while after i still checked in bc i was really hoping he’d be innocent (he wasn’t) and i can confirm he still does this. He also regularly dmed his fans, mostly his black fans, to ask for “help” on being less racist.

I don’t use the word “grooming” lightly, but dream was and is absolutely grooming his audience. Thats why dream stans seem so cult-like these days. The amount of guiltripping, lying, forcing an us vs them mentality, and manipulation I saw this man pull was actually sick. He’d frequently, privately, to us, vent about tommy or quackity, and about how “all his friends hated him” and “we were all he had left” (legit, not joking). He is extremely good at emotional blackmail, he is good at making his fans hate other creators and turn on them, he is very good at utilizing his tears and using wording that he knows will make his mostly teenage fanbase think he’s a good kind person.

He wants to impress on his fans that he really was just a kind person, the only kind person and the only voice of reason. That’s why when the Cantu thing happened, he started posting “messages” of him being so kind to the Uber driver. He needs his fans to think he’s a kind and loving person, and that Tommy and quackity and literally everyone who’s pulled away from him was just a fake friend who couldn’t be trusted. He somehow was always, always the one being fucked over.

I remember when I told my friend about dream (this friend had a completely neutral opinion on him and barely knew the guy beyond his manhunts) and he told me that sounded like grooming.

He gradually isolated his (primarily young, female) fanbase using private accounts, discord calls, Snapchat, and whatever else. He got extremely personal with us far beyond the level any creator should be, he used kindness and flattery (like calling us “mature”. Also legit) to make us feel genuinely loved by him, again, NOT in the way a creator loves their fans. In the way a friend loves their friends, even in the way a partner loves their partner. He lashed out at us and had panic attacks when we did criticize him, he used tactics to make us think he was always right and good, and more than that, make all his detractors seem like terrible people out to get him AND us, he played himself out to be the perpetual victim and used carefully cut clips and emotional manipulation (like how he brought up his ~poor innocent family~ when harassing quackity. Weaponizing trauma like that was something he did ALL THE TIME to us whenever he was criticized.) in order to use us against people he didn’t like, making us take the bullet for him.

He uses his kindness and supposed goodness as a weapon, he used Tommy’s own trauma around doxxing against him when Tommy dared to criticize him (“I supported you when you were getting doxxed, yet you won’t do the same for me?”)

He used trauma to relate to his audience, making us feel like he was the only person who got it.

It’ll sound stupid, but it was genuinely really scarring. The way he made me and my friends feel was so confusing. I often found myself feeling used and violated, but also like I was in debt to him. I dreaded when he’d have fans on call, I dreaded him but also he felt like all I had. The tone of him and the fandom was that “we have to defend him at all costs, they’re out to get him and we’re the last line of support he has”. It was embarrassing, it was stressful, it was horrible. I wasted so much fucking time and energy on him.

it was really traumatic and distressing, especially as a teenager who’d already been at a vulnerable point and used him as an escape originally. I know that sounds melodramatic but I mean it.

He is a groomer through and through. He’s barely getting any new fans, but he’s barely losing any either bc the grasp he has on them is so tight.

Worst of all, if you leave the fandom, you’ll lose your friends and become an enemy. He encourages that behaviour and that mentality. He encourages harassment of his ex-friends, he encourages harassment of anyone who doesn’t like him. He wants you to feel like he’s the only good person, and like he’s the only one who will care about you. And I know at least in my experience that the way I acted when I was a fan of his did genuinely cause me to feel alienated in my social life. I lost friends, I felt like I couldn’t talk to anyone “safely”. That’s how he wants his fans to feel, because at some point he really is all you have.

And that’s why dream stans are still sticking around. It’s at the point where the only way they’ll leave is on their own volition, and the more publicly fucked shit he does, the less hope I have that they’ll do that.

i don’t have much to add but i agree, and several people i know who used to be big dream fans also agreed that there was a heavily insidious ‘us vs them’ atmosphere

[milliebobbyflay]

Okay so I've spent a while thinking about how to word my actual problem with homestuck 2, and the works that make up post-canon homestuck more broadly. I think a lot of people resort to nitpicking bits of awkward writing or art in some attempt to pinpoint a source to an underlying sort of hollow uncanniness, which is funny because homestuck's supposed golden age of acts 1-5 are themselves FAR more of a tonally inconsistent mess of odd character beats, jokes that don't always land, and janky looking art.

Homestuck 2 has been written and drawn by very talented and passionate artists from the beginning, I think the actual issue comes down to a mix between the general pitfalls of hiring fans and the particulars of hussie's outsider background and unorthodox writing style.

First is the issue of hiring fans in general; while it can seem like an easy shortcut to finding talented writers already familiar with the voice and story of the original work, you have to be very aware of how fan culture operates. Beyond the obvious pitfalls that fans are unlikely to approach the story from a detached perspective, there is the larger issue that past a certain point fandom becomes essentially self sustaining. Once a fandom has existed for a long enough period, its most avid members have likely spent FAR more time engaging with other fan works than they have with the original art object. Fandom and the art it produces are, in this way, a sort of a folk tradition; artists are imitating and responding to other artists, characters become archetypes through which to explore certain ideas and dynamics, and the values and tastes of the most prolific and influential fan artists become as inseparable from a participants mental image of the character as the original work itself.

For an example, the affected theatrical mannerisms and cruelty Vriska adopts while in her Mindfang persona have become inseparable from the popular view of the character. Despite the fact that it's heavily signposted as a sort of role playing performance from the jump and she's more or less dropped it by the back half of the comic, it was nevertheless how she had acted in the bulk of her scenes around the time the ur-texts of homestuck fandom were being written, and as so an understandable misread of a character became inscribed into the fandom canon, and by extension her characterization in Homestuck 2.

All of this is extrapolated by the sort of unorthdox, building-the-plane-while-flying-it manner in which Hussie's writing style developed.

Based on his commentary, I get the sense that Andrew is an incredibly clever and thoughtful writer who lacks the theory and vocabulary to precisely describe his process. He tends to communicate in sort of abstract metaphors which aim to bridge the gap in explaining the actual conscious process he uses to plot his stories, but the way he talks about technical nuts and bolts writing craft stuff gives me the impression that his approach is largely intuitive, bordering on unconscious. He's a lot better at describing how he writes than what he writes or why.

You can of course piece a lot this together—his approach to art draws from the tradition of videogame spritework, where the visuals exist as a utilitarian vehicle for conveying information first and a work of illustration only inasmuch is needed to serve the greater story. His character writing draws more from a synthesis of literary fiction, sitcom writing, and "making up a guy" style posting humor, where characters are defined more by their life experiences and underlying psychology than by their goals and values, but also seem to have largely been constructed backwards from a starting point of a funny or interesting manner of speaking. Importantly though, I don't get the sense that these were conscious decisions, just that to Hussie they seemed like the logical way to approach these tasks, and I don't really think he could outline them in a way that would actually help a new team of creators grok how to draw and write in a way that feels like homestuck. I also don't think Hussie could actually explain the psychology that undergirds his character writing, I think he was mostly just drawing on his own life experience and imagining how this sort of character might logically speak and act.

As a novelist, and Hussie is one, both your thought processes and the sum total of your worldview and life experience are just as important to your work as the actual conscious decisions you're making, and I think that where there are gaps in understanding, the new writers are filling in the gaps with both a more conventional approach to the creative process and over a decade of accumulated fanon, and I think that's why homestuck 2 never really rises above feeling like a very well-made fanfic to me?

[spookykoolkat]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐝 - 𝐣.𝐦. 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

"𝚜𝚘 𝚕𝚊𝚢 𝚍𝚘𝚠𝚗, 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝 𝚒𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚜𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚐𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚊𝚐𝚊𝚒𝚗."

pairing: post outbreak!joel miller x plus sized!younger!reader

warnings: age gap, joel is 56 y.o, reader is 25 y.o, slow burn, death, violence, su*cide attempt, mentions of depression, anxiety, self harm, su*cidal tendencies, poor mental health, depictions of violence, torture, sho*ting, st*bbing, self defense, mentions of sexual assault, assault, being held hostage, anger issues, etc. descriptions of living in an apocalyptic world with the infected.

more warnings: drinking, smoking, sex, hunting, fighting (physical and verbal), sexual experiences, descriptions of sex acts (porn with a plot), swearing, MINORS NOT WELCOMED.

summary: joel finds his way back to jackson with ellie after the incidents with the fireflies, and made it his home over the next year. the winter was harsh this year round, hitting jackson a bit harder than they figured. you were a hardheaded girl in her mid twenties, fighting to survive when you found yourself giving up in the middle of nowhere. that middle of nowhere just so happened to be right in the middle of an alarm system outside of the commune. so what happens when the people that find you happens to be none other than the miller brothers?

notable mentions: this is a dark fic! apocalyptic au! set after joel's hospital massacre. ellie is now 15. no use of y/n.

this is an 18+ fic. mdni.

chapter one - stiff and cold

- joel and tommy find your blood soaked body under a thin sheet of snow near the commune, and take you back where you wake up a week later.

chapter two - hell above

- your first week in jackson went just as expected. the world you lived in was hell, but this seemed like paradise to you. except the fact that it seemed like living under joel's roof made him a bit uncomfortable, weary even, and it showed.

chapter three - protection

- it's been three weeks since you made jackson your new home, taking classes in order to patrol, working, and joel is doing his best to try to get used to having you around while you are figuring out your feelings towards him.

chapter four - no good

- one month in jackson and you're still having a bit of trouble fitting in like ellie and joel (sort of) did, until you finally get your patrol route and partner. after he hears that your new partner has invited you for drinks, joel isn't to happy to watch you get ready to see another man.

chapter five - forfeit

- it was your first day of patrolling after earning the right to, but it was flipped upside down when tommy decided he needed to use you and joel for his own little mission. things go awry and soon there's nothing but heated tension that causes little spats to and from the destination.

chapter six - a good man in a bad time

- the next morning after coming back from your unexpected mission with joel was very eventful, and unbeknownst to you, joel felt the need to invade your privacy. it was your birthday, turning twenty six and you were feigning for a little pleasure. at the end of the night, you got it.

chapter seven

chapter eight

chapter nine

chapter ten

this is an prolonged series! out now! updates will continue during the last week of october!

[ in the mean time, check out my kinktober masterlist for some upcoming joel miller oneshots! ]

[maryangelex]

hey hey !! I just read your recent ex husband price fic and it’s EVERYTHING , your writing is impeccable 💕

I was also wondering if i can request angst/hurt no comfort ex-husband price! Is it bad that I kinda want to see this man suffer ?? 😭

a/n: thank you so much anon!!!! and ofc you can because...i too love a man in dispair D: something about price in shambles just mmmmmmm delicious!!!

i hope you love it :D (maybe cry a lil)

c/w: afab! reader, divorce, angst, hurt no comfort, grown man crying, alcohol use, fertility issues, age gap

He should have known better than to take you for granted. He shouldn't have anticipated you'd be fully okay with his line of work and everything that came with it. He should have made more of an effort to be there for you rather than feigning ignorance about how you were feeling, how lonely you had been, how difficult it had been for you to be alone when you needed him most when every pregnancy test would come back negative, or the pregnancy wasn't viable.

Instead, he'd come home to you pretending there was nothing wrong between you two. You gave him the benefit of the doubt time and time again; this was the way he coped coming back from missions, by coming home to the 'perfect' life he had built with you. You don't know what hurt you most, the facade he put on that everything was fine and dandy and there was nothing to be resolved or the cold shoulder he gave you when it was just too much for him to put on a fake smile.

He should have taken it as his cue to drop the act and be the husband he swore to be the second you brought up divorce. And instead, he kept his mouth shut, nodded his head, and gave you a mask of understanding. Once again, being passive about your marriage because too much of his energy had been put into his work. Not only that, but he already knew how much of a failure he had been at being your husband.

He knew you were too good for him since the very beginning. He was too old for you who had just started your life. He was too busy to even begin dating you, much less marry you. He was mentally (nor physically, really) not fully there to provide for you.

So when the divorce was finalized and a year passed, it was no surprise to see you had moved on. You looked happy in the pictures with your new beau, happier than he had ever seen you leading up to the divorce; maybe since after your honeymoon. Your smile was radiant and wide, your skin glowing, and your eyes glinting with newfound hope that this other man would be the husband you really deserved. He knew you deserved better, accepted it, even.

He dwelled on the fact that he failed you at providing you the love and dedication he vowed to you at the altar. The warm feeling of whiskey had become more familiar on his lips than the feeling of your lips.

He missed you like hell, he couldn't think of anything else he wanted back more. He sobbed himself to sleep thinking about how he let you slip between his fingers and lost you, his precious wife. The thought of being with another woman made his skin crawl, feeling repulsed by it. He requested extra missions to get away from the city and the apartment you two shared, but only got himself extended leaves for his mental state.

At the two-year mark, he found himself sick of moping and grieving and decided it was about time he took action. Moving on to someone else was not an option; it was you or nothing. When he picked the pieces of himself back up and could finally stand on his feet, he made his way back to you.

He hadn't heard from you since he saw that picture of you and the new guy on your social media, but he got in contact with your mother and she willingly gave him your new address. And when he stood at your doorstep, a bouquet of tulips in hand and his best attempt at a smile, you opened the door to him and it hit him like a trainwreck.

Seeing you with an infant on your hip made his knees nearly buckle.

"John?" was all you could say, and the sound of your voice after so long made his ears ring.

John Price was a man of steel, a man with infinite courage who braved terrorists and bullets aimed at him. But the sight of you with the babe he couldn't give you, the love he couldn't fill you with, the life he swore to provide and failed to, made him lose any will to live that he had gathered in the last year.

[causticflower]

A Ship Template!  

a shipping template (a fancy + a simplified/more readable version) that I made for fun

so here! have fun too :3

originally inspired by @awfulalignmentcharts and [their ship chart]; I borrowed the general layout and some of the wording, otherwise the graphics & rest of the words is me ^^

more + explanations down under vvv

> a general note: you can fill this thing out any way you want; you can write the answers, draw them, you also don't have to fill out everything, and you can even delete/replace stuff you don't like (it's not like I'd be able to stop you lol) ((also the title, you can edit the [--] or the whole thing too))

> you don't need to tag me or reblog the post if you fill it out

> if anyone wants a different combination of the graphical parts or different font or something else let me know, I'll see what I can do <3 

= Explanations =

(I explained everything just to be sure, feel free to skip parts)

Top part – Introductions:

the big squares → you can put their faces or profiles or whatever of theirs there

the small square (“describe their vibes”) → what their dynamic is like, what vibes do they give off when next to each other etc; for example, are they a cat-person & dog-person kind of duo, or it's a scary dog privilege kind of situation, or do they look like enemies, etc

ship name → their ship name, or their ship names if they have multiple

age+difference → what are their ages + how big their age gap is

height+difference → what are their heights + how much is one taller/shorter than the other 

fandom(s) -> what fandom are they from, or fandoms if it's a crossover ship

name → their name, full or nickname or other

gender → their gender

sexuality → their sexuality; you can specify if it's a romantic, sexual, both/neither type of attraction 

alignment (of your choice) → what the character’s alignment/personality is, up to you if you want to use the classic DnD alignment chart (good/neutral/evil x lawful/neutral/chaotic) or if you want to use whatever else (like add in bastard/fish/pirate etc)

Left Column (the many sliders): 

big spoon <--> little spoon = when sleeping or cuddling; who is the one hugging <--> the one being hugged

actually functions <--> messy mental wreck = how well they are doing mentally; are they mentally well adjusted/stable <--> are they a mess/have mental issues

ball of stress <--> YOLO = what their general attitude to life is; are they stressed/worried about things constantly <--> are they carefree/careless/going with the flow

hermit <--> social bee = how social they are; not social at all <--> very social

scaredy-cat <--> fears no god = are they afraid of everything <--> do they fear nothing

bleeding heart <--> then perish. = how sympathetic they are; almost too sympathetic <--> don't care at all

incompetently competent <--> competently incompetent = basically: their attitude x their actual skill (with the middle being “normal”); look clumsy/careless but are very competent <--> look competent/confident but are actually useless

the world is ending (I fell in love) <--> blushing giggling kicking feet = what their reaction is when they realize they have a crush/fell in love; is very upset/miserable about it/hates it <--> very happy/giddy about it

allergic to PDA <--> sickeningly affectionate = how they act in general situations/around others; acting like they're strangers <--> constantly holding hands/kissing/complimenting each other

wants to get matching things <--> would rather die than change their style = they want to get something (very visible) to signify they are a couple <--> they like their style and won't change it no matter what

cuddles<3 <--> the table is broken again = the horniness meter; they have little to no sex (or it’s an ace/qpr ship) <--> they have sex as often as physically possible

has zero game <--> has insane game = how attractive they are to other people; cannot get a date no matter what <--> everyone wants to date them no matter what they do

crime doer <--> crime stopper = how likely they are to engage in 'bad' activities (either actual crime or just being a nuisance/prankster to their friends); constantly doing something nefarious <--> is actually more likely to stop crime/pranks from happening

watcher <--> meddler = are they more passive in conversations/situations <--> do they have to take part in everything

doomed by the narrative <--> blessed by the narrative = how much has the universe fucked them over (in canon or fanon); their life is/was pretty miserable <--> they are/were doing very well

Questions pt.1 

what brings them together? → what do they have in common / what might have brought (and kept) them together in the first place

what keeps/kept them apart? → what is/was preventing them from getting together (themselves, outside forces, etc)

Right Column:

Questions pt.2 

(badly) describe their meetcute → describe how they met, you can make it funny if you want

what are their fandom tropes/their ship appeal → what are their most common fan depictions (whether they are canon or not), or what about their ship dynamic is appealing to you/everyone

Questions pt.3

who fell first? → which one of them was the first to fall in love with the other

who first Realized (they're in love)? → which one of them had The Realization happen first, when they actually realized they are in love with the other person (basically the Oh. Oh. moment)

who confessed first? → who was the first to confess their love

who cleans up more messes? → who takes care of the mess they make/the trouble they get into more often

who is the first to apologize (after a fight)? → who apologizes first if they had a fight (where both of them might’ve been at fault)

who steals the bed covers? → who ((un)consciously) takes all the pillows/blankets/etc during the night/when they're sleeping together

who's the headrest? → example: A likes to rest their head/chin on B's head/shoulders/chest/etc, so B’s the headrest

who's the chef? (what they cooking?) → which one of them makes their food (and what the food is)

who takes charge of home decor? → which one of them is more likely to set up/design their home (pick the house, furniture, decor, etc)

who's the 3AM texter? → who's more likely to text the other in the middle of the night (for whatever reason)

who randomly brings home a new pet? → who's more likely to adopt random animals as pets / bring animals home to help them / etc

who's more likely to just straight up trip and die? → who is more clumsy/accident prone

“The Touchzone”

no touch <--> yes touch = in general circumstances, how do they feel about others touching them

the figures → you can draw on them or replace them with the characters, then you can color/otherwise indicate where and how they feel about touch on their body (either from their partner or in general, up to you)

you're dead → “I despise this”

do not → “I don't like this / I hate this”

not really → “I'd prefer no touch but it’s tolerable”

…eh… → “I have no strong feelings about this”

mayhaps → “I don't mind this, actually maybe even like it”

yes please → “I like this a lot”

YESss moreE → “I love/adore this”

note for the uncolored version of this: you can put your own colors/symbols/etc in the -[   ]- square next to the words

…and that's it, let me know if you have any more questions <3

[agendabymooner]

colour me your colour || toto w. x ofc (2)

Summary: Tilly Marie nearly loses faith in her passion as she refuses to listen to everyone who told her to quit. Everyone but one. And it’s the man she met years ago at a racing event she didn’t want to attend. Who would have thought that her father’s partial ownership of three brands could take her to the zone of Mercedes and meet the love of her life?

Chapter summary: It's 2014. Tilly fills up the position temporarily as Red Bull's Communication Liaison and meets the man she spoke to all those years ago in Dubai... only for her to realize that he's her best friend's Team Principal. Lewis Hamilton is more than amused with her situation, if anything.

Content warning: Age gap, mentions of an absence of a father figure, brief use of explicit language, mentions of nepotism, discussion of mental health and burnouts. Platonic!Lewis Hamilton content, Platonic!Daniel Ricciardo content. Fictional family and business involved (Hearth family and Hearth Automotives Group). One character is fictional but came from a family (Ford family). NO PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS INVOLVED SORRY

Note: This is actually my demon time. I took a break from posting too much Danny Ric even if I love him sm (this fic needs attention a little bit). Should I make him go feral and chaotic again? I dunno. But anyways, here's for the Toto stans. Please tell me what you think in many ways - reblog and reply even! Enjoy xx

ii. tilly marie wants to go to hell

Tilly Marie. 

That is the name that hides everything that relates to my life and purpose. Truthfully, everyone knows who I am, but I act like a stranger to everyone who works in the location during the races. Everyone has heard of my name but never really knew what I look like. Of course, they would know who I am. I’m sharing my surname with the man who partially owned three teams— all through his shares. 

Julius Hearth is a billionaire who invested much more in motorsport than he should have in his racing career. Instead of becoming a professional driver, he remains a billionaire, relatively close to creating a monopoly in the racing industry. 

A greedy man, they call him. He dislikes the idea of being unable to control his businesses. He could have sold his shares before, yet he keeps a tight grip over each of his holdings and keeps his position in each team as an executive. He’s not even the one at the race right now. He has his daughter act on his behalf and play his part in keeping his teams popular. 

The surname Hearth is practically engraved in each team’s zones. I hate it. Wherever I go, even if I hadn’t attended a grand prix for a while now, eyes would settle on me. Everyone knows my name. I hate it. It should have been Ford instead, maybe I would have allowed it.

And so I stuck with Tilly Marie. Tilly Hearth catches the eyes of everyone in the racing industry. Tilly Marie is just a woman with access to three zones and additional pit access from her friend. Tilly Hearth is for business— for handling problems and solutions in media outlets and communications.

Now that I think of it, I remember considering quitting my job before I was even told to attend the British GP. Have you ever been so exhausted from doing what you love? Or is that something not really something you desire?

I enjoy writing fashion and design articles for everyone’s entertainment. But to be told you’ll be given a better angle on the following magazine issues and still drooling after that promise? Now that’s just an embarrassment. 

Everyone I’m close to knows how badly I am treated at the company. Their sympathy came with advice to leave the company. Yet, despite the gratitude that I felt, I refuse to resign. I have faith in my career. They’ll give me a better angle soon enough. Or not.

One of the many people who told me to quit is here standing behind the gate. His tightly braided hair is covered with a branded cap. His chest is covered in a white polo. He stands there with a cheeky grin as he holds his arms out. Lewis Hamilton never failed to make me smile.

He engulfs me with a tight embrace and lifts me slightly in joy. We have not even exchanged words yet, but I am already smiling widely. 

“Oh, Tilly, I thought you wouldn't come!” Lewis exclaims once that he puts me down. I straighten my slightly wrinkled skirt and look at him with a questioning frown. “You’re going to watch me win in person this time!” 

“You act like I don’t see you almost every month,” I scoff, shaking my head at his pout.

“You haven’t attended any of my races for almost six years,” he points out, referring to his championship when he was in McLaren. That’s how we met. My father was bored and had decided to buy a part of McLaren, Lewis’ first team. I hung around him more often during the past few seasons while I consulted with my father’s other teams - Scuderia Ferrari and Red Bull. Lewis values our friendship more than his team, as we remained friends after he departed from McLaren. 

I was going to protest and defend myself, but he cut me off before I could even talk. “You were working hard at Vogue, I know,” he rolls his eyes before he wraps his arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer as we walk down the Mercedes zone. He still has an assistant with him, and she’s nice enough to ensure that Lewis isn’t doing something stupid like getting our photos taken by paps while his arm is around me. I can see the headlines we’ll make if they see me.

Tilly Hearth’s Comeback Spiced Up by Forbidden Romance as She Snuggles with Mercedes Driver

The Lifestyle of the Rich and Famous: Lewis Hamilton Seen Cozying Up with the Hearth Group Heiress

He continues, “I love you. You know that, right?” 

I nod as he playfully scolds me, “Then why aren’t you listening to me? To your three sisters, even? You’re writing a smaller piece in a magazine for how long? Six years? Why don’t you quit and find a better opportunity?”

“You ask a lot of questions,” I frown, slightly shoving him away while his arm remains wrapped around me. I try kicking him in the leg, but he quickly avoids my attack as he laughs. People that walked past scowl at us. “I knew I should’ve stayed on the Red Bull pit.” 

“In my year of winning? At the British GP?” He scoffs haughtily. “You wound me, Tilly Marie.”

“And while I’m against the idea of staying in your paddock, I’m glad we can agree on calling me by that name so I'm staying because I love you that much,” I grin, kissing him on the cheek as we arrive at the Mercedes hospitality. 

Indeed, I haven’t attended a race for a while now. Putting more time into my job would give me a way to a promotion or an opportunity to publish a meaningful piece in the magazine. But as years go on, I’m slowly backing away from that optimism. So being in this event… yeah, I think I’ll choose this lifestyle once more over that god-awful thing I call a career. 

Still, why haven’t I quit yet? I have little faith in them. I might as well resign. But this advice came from other people. It didn’t come from me. They cannot change my mind, and I wish I’m not this stubborn and stupid. I wish Lewis would bang my head against the wall to get me to quit. 

I know that I have more options if I quit. But even then, I know my options will come straight from my surname and father. Nepotism follows me wherever I go; even if it’s inevitable, I try to control the fire before it spreads. I know that using my name will not help me learn more. 

Even Lewis knows how much it’ll affect my career in a different industry. One that isn’t racing. It’s bad enough that everyone knows me by name, but to use it proudly? Yeah no. Lewis keeps me humbled by calling me Tilly Marie. I love him because of that. 

All of those thoughts have left me alone when I hear a voice ring out behind the two of us. One that calls for Lewis, which has my friend turning around. Out of curiosity and instinct, I immediately turned around to see who called for him. 

Would it be a shame to admit that the man you met eight years ago looked as handsome as before? No. Maybe not. 

My eyes respectfully move from his attractive face down to the polo that he’s wearing. Slight chest hair peeking out from the unbuttoned collars as my eyes finally look at the title on his chest. 

Team Principal

Mercedes AMG Petronas

While it’s not something to be ashamed of, admitting that the older man is attractive will cause bloodshed. One that would begin with Lewis. 

I must admit the man in front of me makes me nervous now that I have grown older. My legs will turn jelly if I hear his accent again. 

“Ah, you have a guest,” the older man smiles at me almost charmingly. 

My legs didn’t turn into jelly. But I wish I had gone to hell earlier than expected because of the heat I can feel on my face. All because of this man. 

Lewis doesn’t catch the reddening of my cheeks. Instead, he nudges me with a grin, saying, “Of course I have. You know how I want people to watch me win.”

“I like that confidence,” the man chuckles, probably still staring at me while my eyes remain on the floor. 

Lewis nudges me again, leaving me to clutch the strap of the bag that nearly fell off my shoulder. I glare at him, and he doesn’t see it as he introduces me, “Tils! This is Toto Wolff. He’s the Mercedes team principal. Toto, this is Tilly Marie. She’s a friend.” 

I can’t longer avoid his eyes as I look up at his dark eyes. I have forgotten how to speak briefly before I clear my throat and greet the man, “Nice to meet you, Mr. Wolff.” 

His stare isn’t intimidating. That’s what I think, but my body says otherwise. Suddenly, the hospitality feels 30 degrees celsius hotter because of his look. 

But he doesn’t say anything about my obvious situation, and with Lewis not saying anything, I assume he doesn’t notice. The team principal then extends his hand in my direction as his accent leaves a tingling sensation in my ears with the words, “It’s lovely to meet you. Miss…?” 

Oh um. Shit. 

Suddenly the roller coaster in my stomach fades as I stammer, “Hearth. Tilly. Tilly Marie.” I immediately reach for his hand to shake as I shudder slightly. God, those hands are cold. I still shake his hand like a fan excited to meet her idol. Lewis, god loves him, has immediately put a stop to it by putting an arm on my side. 

Not realizing I'm still holding his hand, I immediately pull away and offer Toto a sheepish smile and apology. I’m 28, turning 29. I’m not 18. I’m still acting like a child. 

But my internal dialogue is interrupted by a hum coming out from Toto. He watches me move in one place, assumingely unable to reply for a moment. He's thinking of something and it's unnerving.

The silence doesn’t last long as he finally asks, “Are you Julius Hearth’s relative, by any chance? You look a bit like him.” 

I immediately answer, my voice slightly cracking, saying, “Yes. Yes. I’m the eldest daughter.” 

Knowing my family history, Lewis winces at the title I used to describe myself. Even he knows that this is a sore spot for me.

“Ah,” Toto hums in understanding, nodding at the response while he looks around. It seems our surroundings don't interest him, all while people around us are beginning to whisper at the drop of my name and relationship with a prominent figure in the racing business. 

Nevertheless, he ignores the whispering and instead tells me, “It’s surprising to see you here, Miss Hearth—“ 

“Just call me Tilly,” I immediately interrupted him with the insistence of a worried person. “Tilly works just fine.” 

He doesn’t blink at it, even if I can tell he has a question or so at my insistence. He continues regardless, “Well, Tilly, it’s surprising to see you here, in a rival team’s hospitality.” 

I only laugh at that. I laugh at him like he’s an idiot. Or the other way around. He’s calling me an imbecile in his head now, I tell myself as I watch his brows wrinkle slightly.

I tell him, “I’m here as a friend of your driver, Mr. Wolff. And I can hardly be biased about teams seeing as Julius purchased some shares from almost each. There are no playing favourites in my book.” 

“Is that right?” He asks with amusement in his voice. 

“I like to play fair,” I shrug and offer him a grin, “besides, I’m not as good at interpreting races as he is. I’m only here to keep their head checked before they can lash out in front of the cameras.” 

He likes that response even though I mentioned I have limited motorsport knowledge. He chuckles again, nodding in my direction and at Lewis, who I have almost forgotten is with me. 

He doesn’t say anything to me anymore and tells Lewis, “Remember your interview.” 

“Yes, sir,” Lewis nods at him. 

Toto looks at me again and suggests, “Miss Tilly, you should be in our zone more often.” 

For once, my face hasn’t flushed. I offer him a grateful smile and joke, “It’s a bad idea to give me such a privilege. I suppose you’ll see more of me then, Mr. Wolff.” 

“Call me Toto, liebling,” Toto tells me with a wink, “besides, I won’t complain if I see you here— I might as well snatch you up from Red Bull and McLaren, hm? Or is Ferrari also a competition I have to fight for?” 

He turns around and leaves the premise, walking away from us with a big smile while Lewis and I remain silent. 

There’s a scoff that leaves Lewis’ mouth. I watch him shake his head and ask, “What? Did I do something?” 

“No, no, love,” Lewis answers, chuckling in disbelief as he says, “I can’t believe I just watched my boss hit on my best friend.” 

“Who says you’re my best friend? Sylv, Steve and Aims are my best friends,” I scoff. 

“Stevie, Sylvie and Aimee are your sisters, love. There’s a big difference–whatever, you were just flirting with my boss!” He exclaims, making other people look at us at the abrupt loudness.

I wish I had gone to hell earlier.

[alicefromwhichplanet]

Alice’s Ship Guide: Blitzbee

Good day. The Blitzbee Week 2024 has just concluded. I had a lot of fun attending it. However, after seeing some of the interpretations of this ship, I find them quite different from how I understand this ship. At the same time, many of my friends who share my interest don’t ship Blitzbee, which probably has something to do with the popular interpretations of them. So I would like to share my views on this ship, and see if I could inspire some new thoughts on them. Should be fun.

*most of the following analysis is based on tfa, but not limited to it. I like shipping two generally consistent characters in different universes, as a way of training my imagination with slightly different dynamics.

1） They are two childishly reckless young adults. There is an age gap but not very big/important.

Most of the ships I like are “mutuals”: they are equal in strength and mental status. They understand each other better than others.

In tfa, we see many “corresponding” characters in the two camps, for example, Lugnut and Bulkhead are both “the bulky one with destructive power” on both teams. Blitzwing and Bumblebee form a “corresponding pair” as they both play the role of “the funny talkative guy in the team”. They are both young and reckless, having an immature side of them compared to other teammates.

Examples are:

Examples are: Blitzwing (in particular his “random” alter) made a free fall into autobots to have fun messing with them , forgetting about the task Megatron repeatedly told him to do first. Likewise, Bumblebee acts recklessly on many tasks/occasions as well (for example, challenging “Colossus” on a tv show).

The two have an amazing interaction in the episode “Velocity” when they chased/raced with each other, which clearly shows their similarity in personality. Many have noticed the childishness of Bumblebee but failed to see that in Blitzwing as well.

As for the claims of Bumblebee being “underage”, you have to admit autobots are using child soldier in their army to prove that (which is not likely). Bumblebee attended military school in preparation for the elite guards, which should only take adult/ almost adult students, long before he joined Optimus’s team of engineers. The team doesn’t treat him as a child. And seeing from Blitzwing’s personality, he is not so far from Bumblebee’s age. The two are like 20 and 25 year olds mentally.

Also I want to mention that the age of transformers should not be the counted the same way like humans, because they are alien robots who don’t die easily unless they are killed in a military conflict. There is little chance they will perish for old age (all the parts are replaceable), so they can actually live for a very long time if no fatal accident happened. In this case it should be natural for adult bots with an age difference to date, for there is no obvious physical deterioration as age increases. In this case similarity in mental age/ state of maturity is more important than actual years of living. This makes Blitzbee a couple with similar ages rather than a couple with huge age difference.

2） “Growing up together” is the most interesting theme in their relationship.

As I have said, Blitzwing and Bumblebee are both reckless, immature young bots, I would like to see them growing into more responsible and stable ones through learning to take care of each other.

Blitzwing has the mental issue that causes mood swings. He also might have experienced more trauma of war and abuse compared to Bumblebee (the famous triple-changer adaptation being the major one in my fan fiction ideas). After he developed a secret relationship with Bumblebee he would become more stable and his trauma will be healed to some extent by Bumblebee’s powerful, devoted love.

This leads to my major take that Bumblebee should eventually play the role of a “caregiver/protector” in this relationship, speaking of mentality. He should learn to be the one that “fixes” Blitzwing with love and trust. I love to see Bumblebee grow up and learn to be the responsible one that takes care of his lover, rather than staying in the shell of childishness forever and letting traumatized Blitzwing do all the dirty work. Growing up together is an amazing part of this ship and I would love to see more of this in their dynamics.

3） Megatron and the Decepticons are not their enemy.

This is also a major issue I’m having with the majority of Blitzbee fandom. I’d like to propose that since we’re depicting a cross-fractional relationship, it is an excellent chance for us to explore the autobot/decepticon dichotomy in a more meaningful way. Both camps attracted numerous followers and lasted long in the civil war. It is neither reasonable nor meaningful if Megatron’s reign is sorely established on threatening, violence and jungle rules. The decepticons should have fraternity/comradeship inside their camp if autobots do. Decepticons love and respect their battle mates as well, and Megatron as a much trusted leader does show care towards his decepticon soldiers (no need to say that tfa Megatron has shown amazing tolerance and a cool mood in all three seasons). Dehumanizing decepticons to create obstacles for blitzbee is the cheapest and most shallow way of interpreting them either as a couple or as two individuals. Blitzwing as a decepticon soldier has his beliefs and loyalty to his camp too. It is sad that many blitzbee writers simply dismiss Blitzwing’s choice of being a decepticon as being threatened or forced into it, which is just unreasonable since Blitzwing is one of the most trusted subordinates of Megatron. There is a way of exploring both Bumblebee and Blitzwing’s struggles of dating an enemy and their guilt of betraying their camp they willingly joined. This makes the ship more in-depth and lively, only that it requires the shipper to have enough knowledge of politics and an unbiased attitude towards the decepticons.

4） They don’t follow traditional heterosexual roles. They are a homosexual couple (basically, gay. I can also accept genderbending both of them women).

This actually applies to every couple I ship. I don’t like the traditional depiction of romance that requires two individuals to either play by the “feminine script” or “masculine script”. I think this kind of view is rooted in unreasonable expectations/ gender stereotypes of patriarchal society, and is harmful and outdated. I don’t want to assign Blitzwing and Bumblebee fixed roles as “top” or “bottom” as well. Everything should be dynamic in their relationship.

5） If they become mature enough to handle children, Blitzwing is the carrier.

This conclusion comes from 4), and also simply because of the fact that in tfa, decepticons are larger than autobots, this naturally makes the possible cross-fractional kid a “middle size between autobots and decepticons”. This means the kid should be bigger than usual autobot kid (if spark-sexual reproduction is possible) and it would be dangerous for autobots to carry a half decepticon child. If such rule exists, there should already been natural selection working on Cybertron to let the decepticons carry the child if pregnancy happens. Also, as I mentioned in 4), I don’t want to assign traditional gender roles to Bumblebee and Blitzwing, so when it comes to carrying, it is actually the same as other things they should do as a couple: it is alright for the fittest one in a relationship to do it. If the child is big, Blitzwing be the carrier. It’s natural and smooth.

6） (nsfw) Size kink? They have so many more kinks! They actually enjoy non-penetrative sex and spark sex.

This is also based on my take of dismissing traditional gender stereotypes. Penetrative sex is not the only way to get pleasure. Since there is a size difference, it should be uncomfortable/ unpractical for Blitzwing and Bumblebee to carry it out often (If you think they have a size kink, I’ll have to say that kinks shouldn’t be the main reason they get together as a couple, or the relationship would become unhealthy with objectifying the other for sexual pleasure. And it’s certainly not the kind of serious relationship that involves love and respect that I’m trying to write about.).

For one thing, they are very playful childish individuals, besides, sexual reproduction is still not in the codes of Cybertronians, it is actually a perfect chance to break the stereotypes of sexual pleasure solely achieved in penetration. I would like to imagine Blitzbee having all kinds of kinks that may entertain both of them trying all kinds of tricks. Penetration is just a bit too old-fashioned for them. Spark sex, as a more daring method free from any trouble of size, should also be a good choice for them.

7） If there are humanformers, I would like to see Bumblebee being Latino/from Latin America, and Blitzwing being German.

This is my personal interpretation of their human forms based on their accents and designs in canon, and some of the interpretations in fandom. Their personalities fit pretty well for people coming from these two regions, and Blitzwing in particular. There are simply too many German implications in Blitzwing (his accent, his helmet and look, icy) that I just can’t imagine Blitzwing’s human form being anything else.

If you like my interpretation and would like to try this ship, I’ll recommend you my blitzbee fan fictions (ideas). Though they’re limited in number, they’re all consistent to my interpretation above.

Tfa:

Old World, New World

Tfp:

One More Light

Bayverse (Bumblebee movie):

(And the just finished Blitzbee Week 2024 piece)

The Phantom of the Opera

More works are under construction. And if you want to hear out my headcanons just search for #blitzbee in this blog. Thanks for reading!

[tightjeansjavi]

Burning in a Hopeless Dream

Boston QZ: Part 5 ‘Long Long Time’

A/N: holy fuck. Can you see my tears through the screen? This chapter was so difficult to write. It’s so fucking beautiful and it hurts. My god does it hurt. Hope you all have the tissues and wine ready, you’re gonna need it ☻

Summary: Joel and Tess leave the Boston QZ and go to Bill and Franks to retrieve the medicine for you. Joel is determined to hold his promise to you true and return in 3 days time. Will he keep that promise? Or will logic of the situation at hand and his conflicted feelings for Tess, get in the way?

~word count : 5k~ (longest chapter yet, babes!)

Warnings: age gap (m/c is 28) angst, love triangle, mentions of death, mentions of child loss, swearing, unrequited love, conflicted feelings, betrayal, implied smut, feelings of guilt (+18) minors dni !

Songs for this chapter:

“Long Long Time” by Linda Ronstadt

“tolerate it” by Taylor Swift

“Roslyn” by Bon Iver & St Vincent

“my tears ricochet” by Taylor Swift

“It’ll All Work Out” by Phoebe Bridgers

“Lover, Please Stay” by Nothing But Thieves

“illicit affairs” by Taylor Swift

“Fine Line” by Harry Styles

________________

October 2020: 10 miles outside the Boston QZ

Joel was never one to admit that he was good at communicating his feelings. Even before the world as he knew it, ended. He struggled. Sarah was always there to help him along the way, always encouraging him, and he never thanked her enough for it. Joel however, was good at picking up on a person’s body language. He could figure you out with just one look. If you were deemed a good person, he’d know. If you were nervous, he’d know. He had no issues picking up on human emotions and moreso, with those closest to him.

So when Tess had barely exchanged more than a few words with him as they made the trek out of the Boston QZ, he knew she was upset. When she refused to take his offered hand over a pile of rubble, he knew she was fucking livid with him. As they moved through the barren city, he took a mental note that there were more infected crawling through each year. He recounted the safest routes, and the unsafe ones. Joel was extremely observant when it came to the possibility of life, or death. Tess was always a good talker, Joel had come to find this out quickly when they had first met. She was fierce, determined and loyal to a fault. When it came to interrogating someone, Joel always let her take the reins. While he would be in the back of the room, leaned against the door, arms crossed casually, and his teeth grinding. His eyes would be locked on whatever fucker crossed them this time, waiting for his moment to come. Tess was the brains, and Joel? Joel was the guns. Their partnership flowed flawlessly, till you came along.

The truth was, Tess probably wouldn’t have hated you as much as she did if you hadn’t thrown a knife at her man’s face three years ago. She remembers the rage she felt towards you like it had happened just yesterday. She’d be lying to herself if she hadn’t wished that you had been infected, just so she could kill you herself. Tess believed that you two probably could have been friends if things had gone differently. If you had stayed at an arm's length, instead of living in her home? Sure, you could be friends. Tess knew that you were useful. That was one thing she would willingly admit but ever since you stepped into Joel’s life, she felt him slipping away from her, day by day. Feelings were dangerous, especially in a world where you had no clue if you would wake to see the sunrise again. Tess never asked Joel to reciprocate her feelings for him. It was an unspoken rule between them. She knew he did care for her from his acts of service, it was his love language. She had figured it out the first time he had taken care of her when she was wounded, nearly a decade ago. It made her feel special but now that he had given you the same treatment, those feelings dissipated.

She had walked far ahead of him as they had made it out of the fallen city, unscathed. She wanted him to know that she was upset with him. That this was not worth risking her life. She wasn’t doing this for you, she was doing this for him. Her loyalty was to a fault, even when she knew he was wrong.

Joel had to take long strides to keep up with her, muttering about his back as the sun beat down on them. It may be October but it was unseasonably mild for this time of the year. Finally, he spoke. Raising his voice an octave so she could hear him.

“Can you slow it down for a minute? Tess?”

She slowed her pace then, coming to a stop before she turned towards him, hands on her hips. She was annoyed.

“I thought it was absolutely crucial to you that we get to Bill and Frank’s before nightfall.”

She watched as Joel had finally caught up to her, one hand on his lower back as he straightened his posture, letting out a low huff. “Yeah.” he spoke. “That’s what I said, and we’ll still make it there no problem. But there ain’t no reason for us to be using up all our energy on walkin this fuckin fast.”

She nodded then, her lips curving up into a small grin as she shook her head at him. “Oh, alright. Well considering it’s really not all that important after all, why don’t we catch our breath? Enjoy the absolutely fuckin breathaking scenery.” She deadpanned.

He chuckled then. Using his hand to shield his eyes from the sun as he looked around at the vast amount of trees surrounding them. “Y’know what? You’re absolutely right. Let's stop here for a while and I'll get us some cold ones. Doesn’t that sound nice? Give me a fuckin break, Tess.” He walked ahead of her then, shoulder checking her as he passed.

“Look at you old man. Real jokester now, huh?” She walked after him then, giving his back a good shove because fuck him for getting annoyed with her. He had no right.

Joel spun around then, kicking up a cloud of dirt from how quickly he had turned to face her. His eyes were narrowed and the veins on the side of his neck were bulging out. “You really want to start this right here, right now? You gotta be fuckin kidding me.”

“We shouldn’t even be out here right now Joel. This is fucking stupid and you know it. She has a fever, for fuck sakes! She’s not dying and there are far more important things that we could be doing right now. I swear to god if we end up dying to get this fuckin medicine, I will haunt you for the rest of your dying days.” She threw her hands up in the air exasperated.

“Then why the hell did you agree to come with Tess? Hmm? You think this is so stupid? Fine, go back home then. I can handle this shit on my own. No problem.” He spoke sternly. She could hear the hint of disappointment in his tone.

“I agreed to come with you because we’re a team, Joel.”

“Yeah? Are we really a team Tess? Cause lately all you’ve been ‘fuckin wantin to do is argue. Getting this medicine for Gwen is important to me so like I just said, you don’t wanna be here? Then leave.” He looked her in the eyes momentarily before he turned on his heel and continued down the trail, his shoulders tense and his knuckles clenching at his sides.

His words stung, cutting into her like knives and she stood there for a moment, hesitating. A part of her wanted to turn around and go back home. Except, the Boston QZ was never her home. Not really and especially not with you in it. She half expected her partner to turn around, to make sure that she was still behind him. Her hope was diminished as he continued walking. Tess was beginning to realize in that moment that Joel was no longer entirely hers. The shimmering mirage of their once flawless partnership was fading fast; faster than she could keep up with.

Joel was pissed, furious even. His feelings were conflicted. Tess had been his partner in crime forever and he had grown to care for her. How could he not? He had seen her through her highs, and her lows. He had taken care of her when she was injured and she had done the same for him. With you now in the picture, things had become muddled for him. He couldn’t quite grasp what he felt for you. You were attractive, there was no doubt there but why the hell was he going out of his way for you like this? Risking his life? Why did he care so much? Deep down, Joel knew the answer, but he was too ashamed to admit it.

Joel knew he had to be the bigger man. His nature was to be stubborn, hard headed. It’s my way or the highway. Hit the road Jack, fuck you mentality. Being the bigger man was never easy. In order to appease Tess, he was going to have to go against his nature.

When he could no longer hear her footsteps behind him, he stopped in the middle of the dirt trail. Digging the heel of his worn boots into the dusty earth, physically having to ground himself from continuing forward without her. Swallowing his pride, he slowly turned around and walked back towards her. Each step he took felt heavier and heavier. Once she was close enough where she could hear him, he stopped. Turning his head to the side slightly, his jaw clenched before he finally looked at his partner.

“Alright. I’m only gonna say this once so please, just listen to me Tess.”

He watched her slowly come to a halt in front of him, arms crossed over her chest and she gave a slight nod, indicating that he was allowed to continue.

“Now I know how you feel about Gwen. Hell, I know that last night you were probably prayin for that device to turn red, right? Just so you could shoot her yourself.”

“You’re right, I was.” She spoke with zero hesitation.

He gave her a slight look then, a disapproving one.

“Yeah, that part is pretty fuckin clear to me. What I’m tryin to say is that you’re right. Goin out here to get her some medicine is fuckin stupid. She ain’t gonna die. It’s just a little fever, right?”

“What are you fuckin tryin to get at here Joel? If you’re just gonna throw it back in my face, don’t waste your fucking breath.” She spoke, already turning her body away from him to walk away.

Joel had reached out and grabbed her arm firmly, pulling her back around to face him.

“Don’t you fuckin turn your back on me when I’m talkin to you Tess. Don’t you dare.”

She narrowed her eyes at him then before glancing down at his fingers wrapped around her arm, his touch burned. She hated how he had this effect on her.

“I agree that it’s fuckin stupid but I made a promise back there. I promised her that we would get her the medicine, and be back in three days time. I intend to keep that fuckin promise with, or without you.”

His grip softened slightly, their chests were close enough to touch and every fiber in his being was screaming at him for allowing them to be exposed out in the open like this. Their breaths were mixing together, he had sweat dripping down his brow from the sun beating down on them and his chapped lips were slightly parted. Even in this condition, he looked kissable. He always looked kissable.

“Please, Tess. I don’t wanna fight with you anymore.” His tone was soft, whispering to her like the soft breeze through the tri-colored leaves dangling from the branches above.

Tess could feel her walls crumbling from his every word. Her mind was screaming at her to not fall for the trap he had set. He was playing her like a violin, a perfect melody, only for her ears. Her heart sang for him, their lives could end at any moment and it wouldn’t have mattered because at least now she knew that Joel Miller still felt for her.

“Fine.” She finally spoke. Her free hand had been gently placed on his chest, pushing him back a few steps because the close proximity was killing her, depleting the oxygen in her lungs and shrouding her sense of self control.

“We’re wasting precious daylight just standing here. Let’s move.” She refused to meet his eyes as she pulled her arm from his grip, and walked past him once more.

Joel stood there for a moment as she walked ahead of him. Grinding his teeth together before he took a deep breath. He hoped that this would be the last argument they would have over you. He was naive to believe that this would be the last time, not when you were unknowingly driving a wedge between him and Tess. He couldn’t blame you, not really. You hadn’t done anything wrong. Other than the fact that somehow you had chipped away through rough terrain enclosing his heart. You had chipped away the rubble, piece by piece and Joel knew then that he felt for you.

After stopping at the abandoned gas station where the pair had stashed ammo from their frequent trips out of the QZ, they had a 5 mile hike ahead of them before they would reach Bill and Frank's oasis. Their walk was silent, both parties were deep in their thoughts. The tension could be cut through with a knife. Joel hated every second of this hike. The only comfort he could find was from the gentle breeze through the trees and the occasion song of a nearby cardinal.

He walked behind his partner, his gaze burning holes into the back of her head. She could feel it. Tess had come to a slow stop up ahead. Joel knew why. He remembered the first time they had come out here. Finding the skeletal remnants of people. Healthy, innocent, people. Tess had collapsed into his arms that day, her sobs sinking into the sweat soaked fabric of his shirt. He remembers the way his hands held her body close to his, his fingers splayed across her lower back. He felt his own tears begin to well in his eyes. He had past visions of Sarah. The sound of his pleas for the soldier to not shoot. The bullets whizzing, her fallen body in the dried grass. “You’re okay. Please, you’re okay. Move your hand, baby.” He remembers the fear in his baby girl’s eyes. Her blood soaked shirt. her blank, lifeless stare. Her body going cold in his grasp as he clutched her to his chest, sobbing.

Joel came beside her then, looking down at the remains. These people were not infected. They were innocent and healthy. Just like his baby girl and the government didn’t care. They were just as merciless as the cordyceps. He lightly brushed his fingers against her arm, catching her attention as she leaned into his embrace. They stood over the makeshift grave, unspoken. The moment ended when Tess could no longer feel his warmth. He had walked away.

They continued on. Approaching the abandoned town shortly after, that now only inhabited Bill and Frank. You remember the first time you met Bill and Frank. Bill didn’t like you, naturally. He didn’t like anyone you came to find out. Except Frank, he adored Frank. Frank had adored you. Called you his little bird. You both shared passions for the simple things in life. A good book, wine and art. All kinds of art. While you and Frank would be puttering around the house showing you his new paintings, Joel, Tess and Bill would be talking business. Joel remembered the first time he saw your true smile, when he heard your infectious laugh. This little piece of normalcy, hidden away from the cruel truths of the outside world made you so fucking happy. Joel saw the way your eyes lit up and god, did it twist his heart.

It felt wrong to him that moment that you weren’t there with them. He imagined your misery back in the quiet apartment with your lucid fever. Pushing his emotions aside, Joel and Tess stopped at the chain link fence before he pressed down on the buttons, typing in the code he knew by heart now. The gate opened seconds later as they walked through. Listening to the gate close behind them with a light clink.

Bill and Frank were not expecting any guests today. You, Joel and Tess were their only “friends” and normally, Joel would give Bill a heads up through the radio system but this time he hadn’t. Bill wasn’t phased when Joel and Tess popped up on the monitor screen while he sat in his doomsday bunker. He muttered under his breath then, something along the lines of, “these fuckers really couldn’t give me a heads up?” “Fuckin Joel.” He continued, slowly rising from his chair and headed up the ladder, pushing the latch up before his head appeared from the bunkers opening.

“Frank!” He yelled. No answer. With a huff, he pulled himself out of the bunker and latched the door shut.

“Frank!” He yelled again, frustratingly this time.

“Yes?” His lover’s voice answered him from the sun room, which was now his own art studio.

“We got company.” He could hear Frank's excited footsteps padding towards him then. It had been awhile now since they had seen their friends.

“Our little Bird?” He asked hopefully.

Bill shook his head then. “Just Joel and Tess this time. Woulda appreciated the heads up.”

Frank’s face fell slightly when his lover confirmed that you weren’t with them this time. He hoped that you were okay and that nothing had happened. He was quite fond of you.

“Now, where would the fun be in that?” He mused. Leaning down and grabbing his lover's face gently, pressing a quick kiss to his lips before he pulled away, heading towards the front door.

Bill was already walking towards the kitchen. He was annoyed but he took pride in being a good host. He loved to cook. Just as much as he loved a good bottle of wine, specifically a bottle of ‘Louis Jadot Beaujolais-Villages.’ It paired nicely with roast rabbit and sautéed root vegetables. Just the right amount of sweetness to spice; notes of strawberries and black cherries. Light on the palate.

While Bill was tending to the meal, Frank was outside, greeting the unexpected arrival of their friends. He knew Joel wasn’t a hugger by any means but Tess was always open to one. He embraced her, giving her a light squeeze. Joel had given him a slight head nod, hands shoved deep in his jean pockets. Small talk was shared as Frank brought them over to the outdoor dining set up, pulling the chairs back for them like a good host. He went inside momentarily, grabbing the wine and plates and shortly after, Bill had come outside with their meal.

Once the plates were set, the wine was poured, the conversation ensued. Bill was the first to speak as he cut a small chunk of the perfect roasted rabbit on his plate.

“So to what do we owe the pleasure? Would it also kill ya to use the damn radio Joel? That’s what it’s there for. Y’know, to communicate.”

Joel had taken a sip of his wine, letting it seep into his taste buds. It was far more satisfying than his hooch at home.

“Sorry ‘bout that. I had meant to give you that heads up but we were in a rush. Didn’t have the time.”

Bill raised his brow then as he stared at the broader man across the table and as he was about to speak, his lover cut him off.

“Where’s our little bird?” Frank asked, a sense of caution in his tone. If something had happened to you, he would be devastated.

Joel paused then, looking at Tess for a moment before he sighed, leaning back against the chair slightly as he spoke.

“She’s sick.”

Bill was already pulling his gun from his holster, pointing it at Joel. He didn’t hesitate.

Joel didn’t even flinch. Bill had pulled a gun on him the first time they met so there was no room for him to be surprised and he couldn’t really blame him. He would have done the same thing if he were in Bill’s shoes.

“Easy now. Don’t point that gun in my face. She ain’t infected and neither are we. She has a fever, a bad one. Chance she might not make it. We came out here ‘cause she needs medicine. There’s nothing in the QZ, and the hospitals outside the city have been picked over.”

Bill, seeing that there was no immediate threat, grabbed his gun and tucked it back in the holster.

“You really didn’t have a fuckin chance to say that over the radio?”

“Nope. Didn’t want to risk someone hearin and we had to move quick.”

Frank was already getting up from his seat, his body turned in the direction of the house to go and get the medicine and some herbal teas for you. Bill had reached out and grabbed his arm firmly then. “Hang on there just a minute, Frank.”

“She’s sick. They need the medicine and I'm going to go get it.”

Bill let out a deep sigh then, releasing his lover’s arm then before he faced forward.

“Well, I'm sorry that she’s sick. Hope she makes it through.”

Joel could only nod then as he reached into his pocket, pulling out a carton of bullet cartridges and a packet of strawberry seeds, sliding it across the table.

“Sorry it’s not more. Fedra has been ‘crackin down hard lately and we don’t have the particular taste to end up in lock up. Can’t really afford that right now.”

Bill nodded, grabbing the bullet cartridges and the packet of strawberry seeds.

“Don’t sweat it, Joel. I know how those fucks can be. We’d be all better off if they would just fuck off and eat a bag of dicks.”

Joel couldn’t help but grin a little then and he imagined you would have found Bill’s comment to be humorous. Maybe you would even giggle. Joel swore that he could hear your sweet laugh now, it was haunting him.

“Thank you. You know how much I appreciate it.”

“Like I said, don’t sweat it.”

The three returned to their meal, savoring each bite. The only sound that could be heard was the occasional clinking of cutlery on china.

Frank had returned with a small burlap sack, tied with twine. Inside was the medicine you would need. Aspirin, cough drops and herbal teas. He had also included a small portrait of you on a homemade canvas. The canvas edges were rough and bumpy, but your face was distinguishable and life-like. He walked over to Joel then, placing the sack down in front of him.

Joel gave the other man a slight nod then, grabbing the small sack and slipped it into his coat pocket.

_________

The sun was beginning to set and there was a slight chill in the air. Joel and Tess were kind enough to help the couple clean up after their meal, Tess helping with the dishes in the kitchen while Joel was out front with Bill, checking to make sure there were no weaknesses in the perimeter fence. He was on edge as it grew darker, all he could think about now was getting back to you.

Bill seemed to have been reading his thoughts then.

“You’re not seriously thinkin of turning this into a suicide mission, are you? We had raiders last month man. Had to reinforce the fence. You don’t wanna be out there when it's pitch black out Joel. Trust me.”

Joel rolled his shoulders back then, he knew it was completely illogical for them to travel back to the QZ overnight. It was dangerous and there was no doubt in his mind that it could turn into a suicide mission in a flash.

“We don’t have much of a choice. You don’t understand, Bill. She could die from this. Common illnesses can still be unforgiving, especially now.”

Bill chuckled then. Shaking his head cause he knew Joel had it bad for you. It was obvious considering the lengths he was going for you. Risking his life like this. It was completely irrational.

“Well, good luck with convincing Tess that you’re leaving tonight.” He gave him a small salute then and headed inside.

Joel felt his shoulders slump inwards then, watching as Bill walked away and he knew he was going to have to fight tooth and nail with Tess, again.

“Yeah. Thanks for that. G’nna need all the fuckin luck I can get.” He gruffly spoke to himself.

The sun had completely dipped on the horizon, darkening the sky as the million of stars above were beginning to peek through the black cloak.

Joel had headed into the house then, lightly closing the door behind him and he could hear Linda Ronstadt’s ‘Long Long Time’ crackling through the old record player in the living room and Tess and Frank’s warm chatter flowing through the kitchen. The worn wood creaked under the heavy footsteps of his boots. He paused outside the opening of the kitchen, leaned against the cabinets, with his arms crossed over his chest.

“Tess, we gotta head out. It’s gettin dark.”

Tess slowly turned her head then, her face falling ever so slightly at her partner's request and she set down the towel she had been using to dry the dishes. Frank gave her a sympathetic look and grabbed his half filled glass of wine and left the kitchen quietly.

“You’re honestly out of your goddamn mind if you think we’re gonna travel tonight and make it out alive Joel.”

“You knew this was coming Tess. We ate, we got the medicine, and now we have to leave.”

She ran her fingers through her hair then. Smoothing her ponytail down slightly to ground herself.

“Joel. We’re not gonna make it 5 miles out there without the daylight and you fuckin know it.”

He scoffed then. Chewing on his lower lip hard because while he was being stubborn and irrational, he knew Tess was right. They wouldn’t make it very far out there like this.

“I don’t care. We can make camp at the midpoint and I'll stay on watch the whole night.”

Tess took a few steps towards him then, finding herself standing between his legs, smoothing her hands up his chest, feeling his muscles tense beneath her touch.

“Joel, we’re staying here. We’re spending the night. We’re gonna shower and have a decent fucking nights sleep and then we’ll leave in the morning.”

He breathed through his nose then, turning his head to the side slightly with his jaw clenched and his hands balled in fists at his sides.

“Fine. You can stay here and have all that Tess. I’m leaving.” He spoke with a sense of finality in his tone.

She had grabbed his jaw then with her fingers, forcing him to look at her then. Her other hand was wrapped around the collar of his shirt, fingers threading through the worn material.

“Joel. I’m exhausted. You’re exhausted and we’re safe here. We will leave first thing in the morning, I promise.”

Joel allowed her to turn his head to face her. He didn’t have it in him to argue anymore. He was exhausted and a shower and warm bed sounded fucking delightful. He felt guilty in those moments because he felt like he was betraying you and breaking the promise he made.

His fists slowly unclenched as he brought his hands around her waist, playing with the thin material of her shirt. He looked into her eyes and gave her a short nod of his head. He had made his decision then.

“Fine. we’ll shower, spend the night and leave first thing in the morning.”

Tess had loosened her grip on his jaw then. Letting her fingers gently brush across the coarse hair of his beard.

“Good. You could really use a shower. Could smell you a mile away.”

He felt his lips quirk up slightly from her playful remark but his heart hurt, and the guilt swirled around his gut like crashing waves on the rocky shoreline.

He helped his partner finish with the dishes then as if this was a normal routine for them. As if for a moment this was their simple, domestic life together. They bid their goodnights to the couple before heading to the guest room.

Joel allowed her to strip him of his clothing while the steam from the shower enveloped them in a comforting warmth. Coating their skin and the mirror behind them. He allowed her to scrub away the dirt and grime from his body under the scalding stream. His eyes were closed as the water beat down on him. He shouldn’t enjoy these simple pleasures. Not when he knew you were in pure misery, miles and miles away. He allowed himself to open his eyes, dip his head down before capturing her lips between his. Kissing her languidly with his hand gingerly cupping her face as he backed her into the shower wall. He allowed himself to bury himself in her, drinking in her whimpers as he jutted his hips into hers over, and over again. Your image was plastered into his brain with each sharp thrust. He could see the disappointment painted on your beautiful face, your tears soaking your soft skin, leaving salty streaks in their wake.

He finished with his face buried in her shoulder, biting down on her soft skin, panting out her name, above a whisper. His heart was screaming yours. He allowed himself to share one final kiss before he pulled away, turning the handle to the side and listening to the water still and lightly drip. He grabbed a towel for himself, wrapping it around his hips and grabbed the other for her. Gently wrapping her in its warmth.

That night while his body was tangled with his partner, holding her close to his chest, enveloped under the warmth and comfort of fresh sheets. He thought about you and the guilt of his betrayal. His sins against you. He broke his promise and he was going to have to live with it.

In your misery, you cried yourself to sleep that night. Clutching the blanket through trembling fingers. The worn pillow beneath your head soaked in your tears. Your last thought before sleep overcame your senses was Joel, and his promise of return. You held onto his promise like an oath.

CHAPTER 6:

[limi-pie]

Longing or love pt. 2

A/N: Heyo my lovely peaches, am back from inactivity. And I have finally overcome my laziness and procrastinating ass and managed to deliver pt. 2 of my hot, spicy and sexy🔞 ff, hehe.🙊🤤

Anyways, less talking and let's get into it, YUH‼️ Lemme know if you find something I can improve or do better, any form of feedback and support is highly appreciated! For the steamy scenes I highly recommend listening to TXT's "Sugar Ride Rush". 🔥👀

Previous part – Next part >

Pairing: Nakamoto Yuta, (Specific) Female! Reader, and Lee Taeyong

Contains: Babygirl asf‼️Y/N, Professor! Taeyong, Boss/CEO! Yuta, Comedy, Complicated relationships, Classroom sex, Dark themes, Dysfunctional relationships, Estranged relationship, Financial struggles, Mature themes, Melodrama, NSFW, Secretly dating/hooking up, SMUT, Student/Office worker! Y/N, Romance, Slight age gap (nothing too serious or illegal, lmao. In other words they're all adults.) Unprotected sex, (homegirl is careless and dirty like that lmao. Just like me fr)

Warnings: Aftercare, abandonment (idk, I’m just adding it to be safe tbh), alcohol, absent parents, blowjob(m), bullying, breast sucking, breast play, consensual sex, cockwarming, cuddles, cursing, cunnilingus, cum eating, cum play, daddy issues, divored parents, drinking, dirty talk, exhibitionism (slight), face fucking, family dysfunctions, fingering, foreplay, gambling, gaslighting, hair pulling, harassment, kissing, manipulation, making out, oral sex (f), PDA, pregnancy (also mentioned), praise kink, public sex (semi), tattoos, titty-fucking, two-timing, teasing, unprotected sex, verbal abuse (feel free to let me know if there are thing I should add/update!)

Wordcount: 21,2K, honestly RIP☠️ and AM SORRY🙊

–🌹–🌺–💚–🦋–🌹–🌺–💚–🦋–🌹–🌺–💚–🦋–🌹–🌺–💚–🦋–

Disclaimer: (I wrote this fanfiction purely because of my wild imagination and finally let horniness loose‼️)

This piece of writing is fanmade and all just my imagination, I have no actual intentions of actually shipping NCT members like this nor do I mean they would behave/act like this in real life. Another thing, the main theme in this story has deep-rooted issues which involves an abusive, toxic and unhealthy relationship with a father, in other words ‘Daddy Issues’. If you have daddy issues (like myself) or is easily triggered by this kind of theme, then I suggest to read this with caution or not read it at all, up to you. It’s not severely bad but it’s a lot about losing trust, abandonment and mentally abuse, etc., see my warnings to get more clear discriptions to avoid feeling uncomfortable and such.

Finally, regardless if you have daddy issues or something else, please remember that you are deeply loved and that your past relationship with your parents don’t define you as a person.💚 Please, love yourself, cherish and take care of yourself, you’re an incredible person.

–🌹–🌺–💚–🦋–🌹–🌺–💚–🦋–🌹–🌺–💚–🦋–🌹–🌺–💚–🦋–

���Did you fire your tutor?” Yuta asked, eating a cookie and leaning against the kitchen counter when Yuka sighed, “yeah I did.” She huffed and crossed her arms, “–now it’s just time to find a new one…” She chewed her cookie. “I’m proud of you,” he smiled and hugged her, “–and sorry,” he muttered, patting her hair, “It’s okay, Papa.” She nodded, drinking a bit from her glass of milk.

“I’m sorry for making you do this.” Yuta muttered, protectively hugging her as she mumbled, “I wish we didn’t have to hide like this, Papa,” she pouted, cuddling into his chest. “I know, but these crazy reporters and paparazzi won’t leave us alone if they find out I have a daughter and you would get a lot of unnecessary questions, attention, and hate.” He patted her head, “I just want you to live a normal life not feel the pressure of me being a public figure; a CEO,” he confessed, patting her shoulder as she nodded understandingly.

“Papa…?” Yuka mumbled, lying in her bed as he tugged her in, “mhm, what is it, Sweetie?” He looked at her deeply, “are you seeing someone right now?” Her eyes were directed at the hickey on his collarbones, “oh, well,” he mumbled, “–not really, Yuka-chan,” Yuta laughed nervously, rubbing the side of his neck, “liar. Papa’s definitely seeing some woman,” she scoffed sassily. “It might be just a fling, Yuka-chan, nothing serious,” he confessed, patting her hair.

“Just tell me once it’s a serious relationship… I want to meet her too, someday,” Yuka said, turning around as she closed her eyes. “When it happens I will, don’t worry,” Yuta promised, patting her shoulder as he left her room. For my 15-year-old teenage daughter, I really can’t fool her by lying, she picks up on things quickly. 

Dating wasn’t a problem for me, but it was rather a bit of a taboo since I already had a child. And now that I’m a single father, I’m often met with prejudices and stigma. I’ve been to several dates but none of them ever caught my attention or interest. After all, I’m no longer as carefree and naive as when I was young… Besides, I would never introduce a new woman to Yuka if I wasn’t 100% sure that she was the one. I just can’t ever bring myself or her to get attached to someone who could abandon and hurt us again…

Yuta went to his office room, wearing his eyeglasses, and began doing some important paperwork. In the dim light of his desk lamp, his right hand began signing on the piece of paper. “Meeting with Dori-Ani tomorrow, afterwards late dinner with Yuka-chan…” He mumbled to himself while noting it down in his calendar.  However, his head was filled with thoughts of you. That sweet smile of yours, the way your eyes drew attention to him. I should make it clear to Y/N before it gets too complicated… I can’t have a secret relationship with a coworker of mine and hide it from Yuka. It’ll hurt us all in the end.

You were lying in your bed, briefly reflecting on what had just occurred today. Giving your professor a blowjob during the day and then having sex with your Boss at night. You put your hands behind your head and let out a deep sigh. “Park Y/N, you’re really unbelievable sometimes,” you said to yourself and shook your head in slight disbelief, scoffing. You hummed and licked your lips.

“I’m really fucked up.” You confessed out loud before diving back into your deep thoughts.

Funny enough… Threesomes have always been on your bucket list, the intimacy of fucking two different guys at the same time was exhilarating to you. Not to mention the pure pleasure and excitement just by the thought of it. You smirked and nodded to yourself. Never done that before… but two-timing grown men. You poked the inside of your cheek before lying on your right side and resting your head on your forearm. Giving your professor Lee a blowjob wasn’t too bad, if you didn’t do it you would have to drop out! Besides, you lowkey enjoyed sucking on that tasty and big cock of his… You pouted, pursing your lips, and exhaled.

You were surprised though… Never in a million years would you have imagined or figured out that professor Lee Taeyong was secretly crushing on you. Especially with the way he demonstrated his disappointment in you and recalled the countless times of his unreasonable scolding. Then again hooking up with your Boss wasn’t part of your plan, it just happened and you didn’t hate it. You’ve also told yourself and were fully convinced that you were out of Yuta’s league and he probably wasn’t the slightest interested in you. This is probably true but you somehow had tiny hope, something about Nakamoto Yuta made you feel comfortable and safe.

“I wonder when… Mr. Taeyong fell in love with me, mmh~” you snuggled your pillow “–going to ask him tomorrow…” You mumbled, getting super drowsy as you closed your eyes. Your hand reached for your nightstand to turn off your lamp. “Enemies-to-lovers… huh?” You mumbled before succumbing to your sleep.

The next morning…

You woke up after sleeping so wonderfully, “mmh, last night was so incredible~” you stretched your arms and smiled, seeing the rays of sunlight through your blinds. You went over to the bathroom to pee and then wash your hands and face. You wore a white button t-shirt, a lavender-yellow pleated skirt, knock-off black Chanel straps, black stockings, and your black Dr. Martens boots. You wore your silver earrings and headed out to university.

On the bus, you plugged your headphones in and listened to the soft melody of your current favorite song. 

🎶Bogo shipda malhago shipeo I miss you, ije neoneun eopjiman🎶 🎶niga eomneun haruga deo gireo deo gireo, haruga gilge neukkyeojyeo neo eopshi🎶

“I wish we were like yesterday, yesterday…” You were humming happily to Yesterday by CHOA as you made your way to your locker, “mmm, someone seems to be in a good mood today~” Yeonwoo giggled, opening her locker, “heh-heh, you could say I slept great yesterday.~” You snickered, winking at her as she gasped, “oh my god, did you hook up with someone again?” You giggled, grabbing your books and closing your locker.

“I’ll tell you all about it later, for now, let’s eat some breakfast and then head to class,” you smiled, all cheerful and excited. “Mmm~ you seem so interested in Mr. Lee’s classes now, did something happen?” Yeonwoo cooed, placing her notebook on the table. “Wh-what? No, I just realized that this year I won’t slack off anymore,” you pursed your lips, thinking about what happened yesterday between the two of you.

“–Wait, dance practice is canceled today?” You asked, eating some Shin Ramen cup noodles as Yeonwoo nodded, “yeah, Hyoyeon-Unnie is holding a meeting since more students wanted to join our dance team,” she added, eating her fruits. “Anyways, what’s up with your hook-up last night? Which university is it this time? Or is it another unemployed SoundCloud rapper?” She giggled, raising an eyebrow, “wh-what, he’s not a university student or a SoundCloud rapper. In fact, he’s a different league this time,” you prepped your hand to your cheek and blushed at the thought of him.

“Mhm, he’s a bit older and super handsome.~” You bit the tip of your nail and giggled, “yah, Park Y/N, have you lost your mind? Are you banging a rich Ahjussi?” Yeonwoo crossed her arms and stared at you in disbelief, “he’s not an Ahjussi! Jeez, do you really think I would stoop so low to go after someone twice my age?” You scoffed sassily before twirling your hair around your finger, slightly biting your bottom lip. “Then tell me who is it? Is it someone from your part-time job?” She asked, taking a sip of her strawberry milk.

“Maybe…? Ehehe, I hadn’t been fucked so good in a while~” You hummed, sipping your banana milk. “Aish, you’re so shameless,” Yeonwoo shook her head before finishing her meal. “One day you should go look for an actual nice boyfriend,” she said as you nodded. “Yeah, yeah, Mommy,” you waved your hand and got up.

“Could you book me an appointment with your hairstylist? I need to dye my hair,” you hummed, walking with Yeonwoo, arms locked as you made your way to class. “Mmm, you’re going to dye your hair?” She cooed as you nodded, “yeah~ I got paid extra from my part-time job, I’m thinking blonde highlights,” you smiled, walking up to your seats. “Mmh-mmh, I might also need a haircut.” She touched her split ends and laughed.

“But sure, I’ll book an appointment for us,” Yeonwoo said, “by the way, I've been thinking of getting a part-time job as a tutor,” she hummed, placing her books on the table, “oh really, how come? Isn’t working as a barista enough for you?” You asked, fixing your mascara with your small mirror. “Well, it’s just extra easy money on the side, my friend Taeha recommended a website I could use,” she smiled, drinking some water as professor Lee walked inside and greeted us all, “good morning everyone,” he looked around the classroom.

“I’ll tell you about it at lunch later,” Yeonwoo added, opening her notebook as professor Lee began to speak. “Right, so today, we will shortly be discussing the topics for this year’s exams.” You leaned forward and prepped your hand to your cheek eagerly, somewhat excited about today’s class. “It's really beautiful outside,” he leans on the desk, supporting himself. “–How about we work outside and enjoy the nice spring weather?” He suggested while smiling as everyone cheered.

It was strange, just one week ago Taeyong threatened you to drop out of Yonsei University, and just yesterday, you were eagerly sucking on his cock. But today he looked way hotter than usual.

“–Ms. Park, are you listening?” Professor asked as everyone looked at you, “huh? Sorry professor Lee, what were you talking about?” You bowed as Yeonwoo giggled, “Ms. Lee please tell her what she missed,” he sighed as she nodded, “we’re going to be doing some research and reading for this assignment next week, but he said since it’s such nice weather today, we can go and work outside.” She explained as you nodded, “oh that’s so great!” You smiled happily and exited the lecture hall, running to the grass immediately.

“Mmh-mmh!” You pulled the attached Chanel straps down, “this is so nice,” you hummed and took your shirt off, and placed your towel on the grass. Yeonwoo giggled and watched you wear your sunglasses as you lay down as she sat on the grass, “it is nice, however, you should focus on reading instead of sunbathing, silly,” Yeonwoo laughed, writing notes on her laptop.

“I’m kinda jealous of your gorgeous tanned skin, it glows in the sunlight, so sexy and smooth~” she hummed, rubbing your back as you read some articles, “mmh, you think so?” You looked back, feeling her stroke your lower back’s ‘Daddy’ tattoo as she giggled. “Still can’t believe you actually ended up doing it, hehe,” she traced her fingertips on it, spelling out the word.

“Well, I lost that dare after all,” you huffed, lowering your sunglasses sassily as Yeonwoo smiled proudly, “that’s true,” she patted your butt, “–and I’m a woman of my words,” you smirked and winked before popping a blueberry flavored lollipop into your mouth.

“That’s also true, oh Taeha has texted me,” Yeonwoo stroked your back as she texted back, “she wants to meet me in a few minutes since a mutual friend of ours wants to join the dance crew.” She read out loud while also scanning her sociology notes for any mistakes, “mmh, that’s great - the more, the merrier,” you smiled, fanning yourself with your hand. “I should use some sun lotion…” You huffed, kicking your feet.

“Ms. Lee, someone’s waiting for you, near the Yeonhi Hall,” Taeyong informed Yeonwoo as she nodded and ran away to greet Taeha, “what’s up, professor?” You hummed and looked at him while you were reading your book.

“Mhm, are you enjoying your studies or your sunbath, Ms. Park Y/N?” He crossed his arms, staring at you in utter disbelief. “Mmh, don’t worry - I’m multitasking, professor Lee,” you answered, playing with a pencil in your hand, he huffed as he suddenly took a quick glimpse at your smooth back.

“What a mischievous and naughty tattoo, you’ve on your lower back,” you looked at your ‘Daddy’ tattoo and chuckled, licking your lollipop, “and what about it?” You replied sassily and stared at him, “oh nothing, it’s just super sexy,” he laughed before clearing his throat. “Don’t forget sun lotion, the sun’s quite hot today. It's scorching,” Taeyong folded his arms as he turned around about to walk away, “–mmh, oh really? Mind helping me put some on, professor Lee?~” You cooed and snickered, waving the bottle of sun lotion.

He stared at you in disbelief and huffed, “mhm, wouldn’t you think that would be crossing the line, Ms. Park?” Taeyong scoffed and looked around before sitting down on the grass, “mmh, dunno, nobody’s around right now,” you cooed and continued reading your book. “Your friend Yeonwoo could be here any minute–”

“–I sent her over to get me a bottle of cold water,” you smiled and winked, showing your text message, “you’re really a sneaky one, aren’t you?” Taeyong scoffed and crouched down, pouring some sun lotion into his hands before rubbing it on your shoulders. “Wait, let me just,” you reached for your bra’s lock and unclasped it, “there, professor,” you placed your forearm on top of the other one whilst comfortably lying down, “that should be easier,” you hummed, resting your face on your arms as you relaxed.

This woman’s going to kill me… She’s clearly tormenting me.

“Don’t get used to this kind of treatment, Ms. Park,” he rubbed his hands on your back, his fingertips tracing your spine he rubbed your back, you hummed and placed your sunglasses on top of your head, “mmh, feels so good, professor,” you moaned and closed your eyes, feeling completely comfortable in your position. “You have such smooth skin,” he smiled, admiring your figure and the tattoos on your back and shoulders. He took a deep exhale, glancing at your ass as he tried hard to not get any wrong or dirty thoughts about you.

“Here too, professor,” you half-turned and patted on the back of your thighs before snickering, “my, you’re very demanding,” Taeyong exasperated, “you know… you’re sorta making it hard for me right now,” he sighed, rubbing your thighs as his fingertips a few inches away from sliding under your skirt. “How so?~” You asked dumbfoundedly, teasing him as you glanced at him while sucking on your lollipop as you bit your lips.

He scoffed, leaning down to whisper into your ear, “my hands are a few inches from grabbing your ass,” he bit his lips as you snickered and wiggled your ass. “Baby, quit testing and tempting me,” Taeyong patted and squeezed it as you whined a little, he pulled back and averted his eyes. He finally finished, rubbing the sun lotion on your thighs.

“Professor Taeyong?” You called as he turned, feeling you kiss him on the lips, “thank you,” you smiled as his eyes immediately dropped to your bare breasts, “you forgot to rub them with sun lotion, Taeyong,” you caressed his cheek, waving your lollipop and fluttering your eyes as he sucked his teeth, “don’t tempt me like this…” You kissed him, “pretty please, professor~” you asked kindly as he looked around, “this better be the last thing,” he hissed, rubbing his hands in sun lotion.

You nodded eagerly, supporting yourself with your arms behind you as Taeyong rubbed and fondled your breasts in lotion, “mmh, mmh…” You closed your eyes, enjoying the way his hands held and touched your breasts. He looked at you and then your chest, biting his bottom lip as he could clearly feel himself get a boner. You held him by the wrist, making his fingers rub and touch your areola as you blushed, “professor… aah…” you held onto his shoulders as his fingers were playing with your nipples. 

“T-there,” Taeyong said, pulling away as you giggled, “thank you professor Taeyong,” you cooed and then kissed him before popping your lollipop back into your mouth. “Y-yeah, no problem, quick put this on, silly idiot,” he huffed, putting your bra on as you giggled and put your arms up and then locking them around his neck, “sorry~ ehehe~” he closed it as you looked at him and leaned closer as he got a bit shy, “–anyways, class’s over,” he placed your arms down, blushing red as you hugged his arm in return.

You pursed your lips and pulled out your lollipop to look at him, “what?” Taeyong mumbled, “kiss me, Taeyong,” you closed your eyes as he looked around, “you’re such a troublemaker,” he hissed, cupping your cheek and pulling you into a quick kiss as you deepened it. “Mhm… You taste like blueberries.” He hummed, tasting the sweet flavor of your lips. You started to kiss him more and as much as he wanted to push you away, he simply couldn’t.

“Mmh, mmh, professor,” Taeyong embraced you and continued kissing you, “Y/N,” he whispered, pulling you on his lap as you held onto his shoulder, “professor,” you called out when the two of you began making out intensely, you closed your eyes and smiled. “You’re a great kisser professor,” you whispered, placing kisses along his jawline as he panted a bit. “Love your kisses, Baby,” he huffed and kept making out with you roughly, he placed small kisses on the side of your neck as you whined.

He snatched the lollipop from your hand and he put it inside his mouth, he smirked before making out with you roughly. Your tongues rolled and swirled around the round piece of candy. You moaned, swallowing the mixed saliva as it dripped from your chin. He left the lollipop in your mouth and smirked before kissing your neck. “Ooh professor…” You muttered completely dazed by the way he was making you feel. 

You felt something throb against you and looked down, you could clearly tell Taeyong was rock hard. You licked your lips and dropped the lollipop, you began stroking the outline of his zipper as he grunted, you looked into his eyes and smirked devilishly. He groaned as you silenced him by making out heavily.

The making-out session continued for several minutes as Taeyong slipped his hand under your skirt as you looked down and pulled him closer. “You like it?” Taeyong whispered, rubbing your thigh as you simply nodded, his hand started to rub on your panties, “aah…” You whimpered, feeling his palm press on your clothed pussy as he licked his lip. 

He decided to kiss you and slide his hand into your panties, you looked at him and blushed red before making out with him, “mhm, mhm, Beautiful,” he slowly made out with you, “aah…” Taeyong stuck his hand inside your panties and gently cupped your pussy. He pulled back and looked at the beautiful expressions you were making, his fingers traced up and down on your outer labia, “aah… ahh…” You moaned and panted lowly, he inserted two fingers inside your pussy as you threw your head back.

“You like it…?” Taeyong whispered into your ear, touching and rubbing your pussy, “–you like it when I touch you like this?” He cooed, fingering you deeply as you nodded, “love it so much, professor,” you nodded eagerly and smiled, blushing red. He pulled your panties to the side as you smirked and started to make out with him, “love it when you touch me, Taeyong,” you moaned, feeling him rub and finger you hastily as you arched your back. He smiled and kissed your lips, “love hearing you moan like that, Baby,” he whispered, rubbing your clit.

“Aah, ahh…” You moaned as Taeyong pressed his forehead against yours, “you sound so sexy like that,” he grazed your clit as you were starting to get super wet, “you’re so fucking wet,” he chuckled as you gasped, “not my fault your fingering is incredible,” you moaned as he pulled your panties’ waistband down, you helped him slid them to your knees as you kept making out with him.

You felt his fingers curling inside your wet pussy as you kept moaning in between your hot kisses. “You’re so damn wet, Baby,” Taeyong hissed, pulling his fingers out to taste your juices as he kissed you, he swirled his tongue around yours as saliva dripped from your lips. You blushed red and spread your legs as he rubbed you roughly, you ground against him and tried to keep your moans as low as possible.

“Ooh professor, Taeyong…” You gasped, feeling him finger you deeply, you wrapped your arms around him and rubbed yourself against his hand, you moaned into his ear as he smirked and chuckled. “Ahh, aah,” you stammered as he made out with you, swallowing your moans and whimpers. “Beautiful, mmh, mmh,” he hummed and squeezed your ass while kissing you like crazy as you gripped onto his shirt.

“–Y/N-ah!” You heard Yeonwoo’s voice call from a distance as he immediately pulled away from you. “Mmh, Taeyong…” You murmured, pressing your lips together as he looked down and put your panties back on you, “I know Babygirl,” Taeyong whispered as you kissed him one last time.

“Later,” Taeyong mumbled and got up quickly, fixing his tie as he walked off. On the pathway, Yeonwoo bowed to him as she ran over to you. “How’s reading going?” She smiled and sat next to you. You were still dazed from making out with him, you wore your sunglasses and tried to hide your smeared lipstick by covering your face in the book “–It’s going alright, just super boring…” You mumbled, nervously tagging some hair behind your ear when she suddenly snatched your book, “–hey! W–What are you doing?”

“Are you sure that you were reading this whole time?” Yeonwoo raised an eyebrow, staring at your lips as you pressed them together. Crap… she’s gonna know, I’m good as dead! You thought and sighed deeply, “you probably fell asleep and drooled all over this book while I was away,” she huffed, returning your book as you peeked at her innocently. “Ahaha, yeah you know me,” you laughed awkwardly. No way…! She’s actually buying this? You thought as she reached for something in her tote bag.

“Here, you must be thirsty sleeping in this heat,” Yeonwoo said, handing you a bottle of cold water, “ah thank you,” you smiled, taking a sip as you felt super refreshed afterward. “I had to go all the way around to the next vending machine since the closest one wasn’t working,” she frowned, checking her notebook while reading it.

I guess she did, thank God. It would’ve been so embarrassing if she caught me and professor making out here on the grass…

“Anyways, how’s your mother in the US?” Yeonwoo asked as you hummed, “I haven’t called her yet, should Facetime her later, I hadn’t really had time to catch up with her,” you replied, writing some keywords on your laptop. Taeyong observed you from afar behind a tree before sighing in relief.

Fuck, that was fucking close… He wiped the sweat off his forehead and chuckled. Y/N’s is a dangerous one, I’ve to be careful around such a woman. 

You headed to the cafeteria to eat lunch with Youngji and Yeonwoo, along with a random girl you hadn’t met before. “Get a lot of food to eat, Unnie, you seem so skinny these days,” Youngji said, placing some Kimchi on your tray as you giggled, walking to an empty table as you sat down, “so Y/N-ah, and Youngji, this is Nancy she’s a new member to the dance team,” Yeonwoo said, patting her back as she bowed as you did the same while smiling.

“Nice to meet you, Sunbae and Ms. Youngji,” Nancy greeted as Youngji smiled, bowing too, “no need to be so formal with us,” she added, eating her rice, “anyways, Yeonwoo, you said your friend Taeha used to work as a part-time tutor right?” You hummed, eating your pickled radish as she nodded, “yeah, this is the website,” she said, typing the link into your laptop. “–Though she was recently fired, it had nothing to do with her, it was just something personal with the student.” She explained, “Ms. Akiyoshi, huh? She looks like a good kid,” you hummed, checking her profile picture.

“Taeha said that Ms. Akiyoshi usually fires tutors after a third time’s visit, she doesn't know why,” Yeonwoo hummed, eating her veggies, “oh, that sounds super unreasonable. I mean if you’re doing a great job at teaching or helping her with homework - why would you fire her then?” Nancy asked, looking at us while eating her egg.

“Maybe the kid got issues or something, it’s weird though, how much did she pay Taeha?” Youngji asked, drinking her banana milk, “Taeha said it was definitely worth the money, I mean even on her last day. She received an extra envelope with 15.000₩ from Ms. Akiyoshi,” Yeonwoo nodded, drinking her strawberry milk, the large amount of cash mentioned caught your attention as you signed up on the website.

“–Oh maybe I should try tutoring too, I didn’t know you’d get so much from tutoring chaebol kids~” You snickered, cupping your cheek and thinking about the potential money you could earn by teaching a brat. “It’s not that easy, Y/N-ah, imagine you also have to do unusual chores probably even babysitting them, I mean snobby chaebol families aren’t kind-hearted people,” Yeonwoo warned as you were too busy fixing your profile on the tutor website, “she looks cute and kind,” you hummed, checking Ms. Akiyoshi’s profile. Youngji moved closer, “ah, she looks a bit fierce and stubborn, kinda like you Unnie,” she chuckled.

“I hope she’ll accept my request,” you sent your application and hoped for the best. “So Nancy, what’s your major?” You asked, looking at her with a soft smile, “ah, I major in English Language and Literature. You and Yeonwoo-Unnie are sociology majors right?” She replied as you both nodded. “What about you, Youngji?” She asked, looking at her. When a man walked up to your table and knocked on it.

“–Excuse me for suddenly interrupting young ladies, Ms. Park, could you kindly help me with organizing in the library after school?” Mr. Jeong asked as you smiled, “sure I’ll be there around 4:00 PM, professor Jeong” he nodded and bowed, “sweet, I’ll see you there then, enjoy your lunch, ladies.” He smiled before walking away as Youngji smirked.

“Who’s that hottie, have never seen that professor before,” she admired him as he walked away, “oh that’s foreign exchange English professor Jeong Jaehyun, he’s originally from the US. One of the new English professors here at Yonsei University,” Nancy explained, eating her fruits. “By the way, my major’s Music Composition,” Youngji smiled as we all giggled.

“Come see me later in my meeting room, okay?” - Professor Lee T.

You read the note that was placed inside your locker as you looked around to check your surroundings, ensuring no one saw Taeyong’s note. You didn’t expect a random meeting with him once again after school.

You knocked on the door, “hey, professor Lee. It’s Park Y/N, are you in there–?” Taeyong pulled you inside and immediately locked the door, kissing you passionately as you embraced him, “–mhm-mhm, Y/N, you kept me waiting~” he hummed in between your kisses as he carried you to the table.

“–Mmh… Professor Lee… Ooh…” You mumbled and gripped tightly onto his shirt, feeling slightly flustered when Taeyong made out with you roughly. “Mhm, you don’t know how desperate I was to see you after flashing your boobs to me earlier, Y/N~” he cooed, kissing your neck as you whined a little.

“You know, you could’ve just fucked me there, professor Taeyong.” You scoffed, feeling him caress your cheek as you furrowed your eyebrows, “my, you seriously have no shame, do you?” He huffed, hearing your answer, “says the one who removed my panties and was fucking fingering me in public,” you huffed, crossing your arms.

Taeyong laughed before giving you another kiss, “mhm, glad you enjoyed it as much as I did, Beautiful,” he added before holding you close, placing kisses all over your neck and collarbones. “We could’ve gone for a quickie,” you insisted, kissing him while winking. “I’m sure you would’ve liked it, you dirty pervert,” you teased as he kissed you roughly.

“Mhm, you wanted me to fuck you in the public space of Yonsei?” Taeyong scoffed, “–and for your dear Yeonwoo to see?” He added and smirked, tempting you with his words as you sighed, leaning against the edge of his table. “Uh-huh, mmh, I bet you’d enjoyed it~” you smirked, rubbing your knee against his boner as he groaned, “fuck, Baby.” He hissed, glancing at you almost admiring you. You locked your wrists around his neck as you made out with him, “mmh, professor,” you sighed as he kissed you roughly, he was so greedy of your lips, softly nibbling on them as he groaned.

Little Ms. Yonsei’s Goddess is such a tease… Holding back is becoming incredibly difficult for me. I might actually fuck her today…

“Y/N…” Taeyong pulled back, his eyes fixated on you and his forehead pressed against yours. “Mmh, professor,” You hummed, hugging him as he licked your neck. “Aah… Taeyong…” You muttered, feeling him suck on your collarbones. “–I’m getting hard, Babygirl.” Taeyong confessed as you looked at him. Surprisingly, you weren’t expecting him to straight up admit it.

“–So, are you going to fuck a student of yours?” You hummed, pushing him away as you tilted your head sassily, crossing your legs.

You were truly nothing but a menacing brat disguised as a young lady as if you weren’t super horny earlier for him and his attention.

You slid the Chanel straps off your shoulders as he poked the inside of his cheek. “Chanel huh?” Taeyong cooed, pulling it as you hummed, “it’s a knock-off, my ass is too broke to afford real designer things,” you admitted as you cupped his face before making out with him. “It almost could pass off as the real thing, want me to buy it for you?” He cooed as you fluttered your eyes.

“Would you do that for me, professor?” You tilted your head and held onto his shoulders before kissing him, “mhm, of course, I would.” No matter how many times you’d kiss him he could never have enough of you or your lips.

“Let’s continue from where we left off, professor,” you whispered, staring into his eyes that were full of lust as he nodded, deeply making out with you. His hands ran up and down on your back as you whined, feeling him swirl his tongue around yours. You were both panting slightly as he looked at you slowly unbuttoning your shirt.

“Can we really do this?” Taeyong looked at your bra and exhaled deeply, “hmm… You want to fuck your own student?” You taunted him, dangling your feet as he huffed before hesitating a bit. But in the end, he nodded slightly.

It’s funny how the tables had turned, yesterday he was demanding and so dominant. But it seems today you had him wrapped around your finger. You were clearly taking advantage of this situation.

“Mhm, I thought that you would never ask, professor,” you smirked, playing with his tie as you pulled him close, “fuck me good, Taeyong,” you said before making out with him again, “mhm~ good answer, Beautiful,” Taeyong chuckled in between your deep and passionate kisses, he unbuttoned his button-up shirt.

You didn’t mind getting fucked by your professor, especially not when he’s so fucking handsome, hot and super intelligent.

“Don’t be so rough, be good to me, okay?” You demanded as he nodded before embracing and kissing you. “You have no idea how long I’ve liked you and how much I wanted you, Park Y/N.” Taeyong conveyed, looking at you deeply as you fluttered your eyes.

“Mmh, are you head over heels for me, Mr. Taeyong–?” You mumbled, looking at him. “–And you’re as clueless as usual.” Taeyong scoffed, grabbing you by the chin and gently rubbing your bottom lip before kissing you hard. You giggled and closed your eyes before deepening the kiss. 

Professor Lee Taeyong, the man who never seemed to understand why everyone at the university admired or loved you finally understood now. You were outgoing, passionate, and incredibly beautiful; a killer personality. No one could resist your charms or your sweet smile.

“You like what you see, professor?” You took your shirt off and revealed yourself to him, he smirked and nodded in amusement, “oh Y/N, I definitely love what I’m seeing, Babygirl,” Taeyong poked the inside of his cheek and traced the material of your bra. He stepped back to take his shirt off, tossing it on the chair behind him as he flexed his abs to you. You whistled. “Damn, you’re fucking hot, professor,” you licked your lips, grabbing the edge of the table.

“Mhm, you think so?” You traced your fingertips on his abs as he smirked, “super hot,” you cooed, rubbing his torso as he slid your bra straps down. “Taeyong… Aah…” You whined, feeling him place kisses on your neck as he proceeded to take your bra off. You blushed red, seeing the way he looked and admired you. “Come here Baby,” he cooed, cupping your face and kissing you. Your chest pressed against his. You pulled him by the tie to make out with him. His hands ran up and down on your back as you two were making out like crazy.

The physical contact of your nipple rubbing against his turned you on, “aah… ahh…” You looked at him as he smirked and continued deepening his kisses with you.

And before you knew it, you couldn’t stop wanting more of him, his touch and his lips… His love for you…

“I like you so much, Baby,” Taeyong conveyed, kissing you deeply as you wrapped your arms around him. “Ooh… Taeyong, prove it to me then…” You hummed, feeling him place kisses and hickies on your neck and collarbones. “Mmh… My Taeyong…” You whined, feeling him press soft kisses on your breasts as you bit your lips. You could feel him grope and fondle your soft right breast in his warm hand. “Aah… Ahh…” You moaned, feeling him play and cup it so roughly that it was driving you crazy. “You have big and beautiful breasts,” he whispered, running his thumb over your nipple. You moaned, closing your eyes.

“Do you like it when I touch your boobs?” Taeyong scoffed, kissing your neck as you nodded desperately, “mmh, I love the feel of your veiny hands touching all over my tits, professor~” You licked your lips as he smirked, “just call me Taeyong, Beautiful.” He commanded and kissed your breasts. “Aah, ahh Taeyong…” You moaned, watching him motorboat them. “Mhm, Baby~” he cooed and kissed your nipples as he pulled back. You met each other with a sweet gaze then embraced each other. 

“Professor…” You mumbled, letting him play and shake your soft breasts as he hummed. You could barely keep it together with the way you were being touched. “Mhm, Beautiful?” Taeyong cooed, kissing you deeply and passionately, you ran your hand up and down his abs. “I want you to fuck me now.” You demanded, admiring and stroking his ‘Astro Boy’ tattoo as he chuckled, unbuckling his pants as he looked at his watch before holding you close. “Alright, don’t worry professor’s going to fuck you good, Beautiful.” He muttered, patting your hair.

“–Mhm, but we don’t have a lot of time Babygirl, I’ve a meeting after this,” Taeyong whispered as he stripped you off your panties, leaving you in your skirt. You greeted him with a deep warm kiss before pulling his pants down. “I know professor Taeyong,” you hummed, pulling his black Celine boxers down as his cock sprung out. You blushed at the sight of it. You rubbed him, several groans leaving his lips.

“Mhm, too bad we’ve time for only one round, I would’ve fucked you till the sun went down.” Taeyong replied as you hummed, he poked the inside of his cheek, stroking and pinching your right nipple, listening closely to your loud whines and moans of his name. “Aah… Ahh… Taeyong!” You mewled, watching him suck on it greedily. “Aah… You’re like a baby, Taeyong…” He held both of your breasts as he shook them a little, you leaned back, closed your eyes, and moaned loudly.

“Aah… Ahh… Taeyong… You’re such a pervert!” You blushed red, feeling yourself get wet once he rubbed your nipples against each other, “sorry, seeing you moan and whine like that is such a turn-on, Beautiful,” he hissed. “Not to mention how perfect they are,” he scoffed, staring and fondling your breasts before licking and sucking your left nipple, you caressed and pulled his hair, letting out some low moans as you hugged his head.

A few minutes had passed as your breasts were covered in his kisses and your nipples covered in his saliva, “ooh Taeyong…” He smirked, seeing you marked in his love bites, “such a pretty girl,” Taeyong smirked as you blushed red, leaning back when he groped and fondled both of them, you moaned. “You have such pretty boobs, you know that?” He whispered into your ear as you gripped onto his left shoulder, as he pulled his pants down. You noticed his big bulge in those Celine boxer briefs and were super excited. “Professor Taeyong…” You hummed and touched his cock, “you like my cock, hmm?” He huffed, feeling you stroke and rub him gently as he grunted. “Mmh, I can’t wait…” You nodded excitedly while jerking him off.

Taeyong chuckled before smirking. “Taeyong… I’m a bit nervous…” You mumbled as he took your skirt off. “Mhm, don’t worry I’ll take care of you, we can stop at any moment if you feel uncomfortable.” He reassured you, holding your hand as you nodded and spread your legs apart.

“Now let’s warm you up a little, Baby,” Taeyong cooed, placing kisses on your abdomen and torso before pulling your Calvin Klein thong down as you blushed, “mmh, Taeyong…” You felt his warm lips place kisses on your pussy as you looked down. “A-aah… A-Ahh…” You whined, feeling him kiss and lick your outer labia, “mhm, so tasty,” he hummed, licking his lips as he started to suck on your lip, you gripped his hair and stroked his head. “Aah… Ooh, professor…” You moaned lewdly, feeling him suck on your clit as you thrust a little against his mouth.

“M-more Taeyong, please,” you muttered, blushing red as you pressed your pussy against his chin, “ask and you should get, Beautiful,” Taeyong smirked before slipping his tongue inside your folds, licking and slurping all your juices. You pulled his hair and moaned loudly, arching your back and rocking your hips. “Ahh, ahh, Taeyong!” You held his head as he was sucking on your pussy, you got wetter with each second that passed. Then he licked all the juices, not letting a single drop go to waste. He detached himself from your pussy as he stood up, facing you and licking his lips.

Without a warning Taeyong looked at you deeply and shoved his big cock inside your pussy, you hugged him close, “aah!! Ahh! Taeyong…!” You cried at the stretch as he made out with you, “does it hurt?” He whispered under his rough panting. You squeezed his hand, shaking your head, “I’m not…” He fucked you at a fast pace, “–I’m not used to having such a big cock like yours enter me like that…!” You panted helplessly and heavily, trying to adjust to him as he watched you closely, admiring your loud and beautiful expressions.

“You look so adorable whining. But I know you can take it,” He chuckled, kissing you passionately as you ran your hands up and down his back. You inhaled and exhaled, his cock was so overwhelming and intense as a result; you cried a little, “nngh… Taeyong…” You whimpered, hugging him as you spread your shaking legs.

“Sorry, I’ll go slower, I was so excited that I got too impatient, forgive me, Y/N,” Taeyong whispered, cupping your cheek as he wiped the small tear away as you nodded before giving him a soft kiss. “It’s alright,” you replied through your shaken breath as he held you close to him, gently stroking your long black hair. “I’m also super excited and get so easily impatient too…” You hummed, locking your arms around his lower back and pulling him closer, his cock went deeper inside as you both moaned.

“Mmh-mmh… professor…” You moaned as he made out with you. “Fuck, fuck, feels so fucking great,” he cussed, lifting you in his arms as he was slipping in and out your pussy, leaving you frustrated with the way he was moving so hastily and impatiently.

“Aah… professor go slower, you pervert,” you hissed, grabbing onto his shoulders as Taeyong chuckled and smirked, “sorry, Beautiful, I will go slower,” he hummed before kissing you, he placed you down on the table again as he was going at a slower and enjoyable pace. You both moaned as you threw your head back. “So wet and warm, it feels so fucking nice, Baby,” he hissed into your ear as you kissed his neck.

A few blissful minutes passed as Taeyong finally started to fuck you steadily. “I can’t believe that we’re actually fucking right now… Aahh…” You whimpered, feeling him throb inside you, “yeah… I can’t believe it either, feels so unreal,” he threw his head back. “You’re squeezing me so tightly, Baby,” he groaned, feeling your pussy clench around him, you both let out moans. “Ohh, Taeyong you’re making me feel so good…” You whined, arching your back as he chuckled.

You began pushing against him too, wanting him to go faster as you were so needy for him. “Faster, faster, Taeyong! Ahh-aah!” The table was shaking as he kept thrusting, sweat forming on his forehead as you both moaned, “feels so incredible, Beautiful, you’re treating my cock so well,” Taeyong groaned, making out with you.

To think that having sex with your professor in a locked room could be this hot.

“Professor, I can’t believe it, I… just can’t,” you stammered, unable to form words with the way he fucked your pussy. His deep and rough thrusts were driving you to your limits, “you’re making me feel so good, Beautiful…” Taeyong whispered as you blushed red. He thrust a few times as you were panting a lot, “need a little lube, Baby?” He cooed, pulling the bottle of lubrication out of his pocket as you nodded desperately. “Mmh, you came prepared…?” You cooed, making out with him as he used a little lube on your pussy. “Mhm, don’t misunderstand me. I just masturbate here sometimes when I’m bored - that’s all, Baby.” He chuckled, placing his cock back inside as you both moaned, “much better, aah, ooh Taeyong…” You wrapped your legs around him tightly as he held onto your hips. 

You both maintained small and deep eye contact with each other. Your forehead pressed against his, ensuring you that you enjoyed this as much as he did. You look down to see where you were both connecting and blushed red, his cock fits your pussy so incredibly. Neither of you said a word. The only thing that could be heard were you two's loud moans and heavy panting.

“Ahh… Professor Taeyong, please go harder,” you whined, clawing onto his back with your nails, “Mhm, you want me to go faster, Baby?” Taeyong chuckled, going slower as you whined loudly, rolling your eyes as he teased and tormented you. “Mhm, you want to be fucked harder, Baby?” He smirked, thrusting in and out as you winced at the loud and wet sounds of skin slapping. “Don’t be mean to me, you asshole…” You pouted, biting his neck and leaving a hickey as he chuckled. “Alright, get ready ‘cause once I’m going hard I won’t slow down,” he whispered into your ear as you nodded desperately, making out with him.

Taeyong held onto your asscheeks, shoving you up and down on his cock. You grabbed onto his shoulders, those rough thrusts gave you a lot of pleasure. “Aah, aah, Taeyong… Mmh-mmh…” You moaned, feeling your breasts bounce up and down as he was fucking you at a faster pace. “Fuck, I’m getting close, Y/N,” Taeyong scoffed, feeling his precum inside you. “Ooh, Taeyong, d-don’t stop…” You moaned, holding onto him tightly as you were both desperate for your climaxes. He groaned loudly as his thrusts were getting sloppier, fucking you deeper, “ahh… ahhh…” You moaned as he sucked on your breast greedily.

“Mhm… I can’t believe I’m banging Yonsei’s precious and beloved Goddess.” He pulled back as you blushed, feeling shy by his statement. “Goddess? You too, professor Taeyong?” You held onto his shoulders as he pulled you closer, “you also believe in that bullshit rumor?” He let you feel the rough impact of his cock thrusting in and out, causing you to whine and whimper. “Of course I do, you’re Yonsei’s beautiful Goddess, every guy admires and likes you.” You blushed red, you didn’t like that statement of you being a Goddess. You strongly disliked being superior to others who deserved that title more than you did.

“I don’t want to be Yonsei University’s Goddess…” You whined, feeling him go deeper as you saw his bulge moving on your abdomen. He smirked with your silly reply, “mhm, then who do you want to be?” Taeyong cooed and looked into your eyes, fondling your right breast as you moaned, “I want to be yours,” you said flusteredly as he kissed you. “Is that your true answer or is it because I’m fucking you too good right now?” He kept thrusting as you rolled your eyes and gripped his waist before moaning loudly. “Mhm, too dazed to answer your professor?” He placed a hand on your ass as he groped it.

“Aah! Ahh! Taeyong…” You cried, feeling him get rougher as he was deeply fucking your pussy. “My what a greedy pussy, you look super sexy stretched around my cock like that.” Taeyong looked down to where you were connecting and smirked, kissing you deeply as you huffed, “love seeing you like this,” he chuckled as you cupped his face, “I like being fucked by you like this, professor,” you breathed heavily as the table was shaking, your hand gripping tightly on the back of his neck.

Taeyong chuckled, “mhm, good. I’m glad that you’re enjoying this as much as I am,” he hummed, gently biting on your earlobe as you grasped onto his back, “come to me whenever you need advice or something, I’m more than happy to help you out,” he added comfortingly as you felt him fuck you slower, you whimpered and nodded before holding onto him tightly.

“Can I come to you… if I’m horny?” You asked shyly, looking into his eyes as Taeyong chuckled at your request. “Of course, I’ll fuck you real good if you ever need it, Babygirl,” he smiled as you giggled before kissing him passionately, “mmh-mmh, professor, I like it,” you hummed in between your kisses, “I like the way you’re fucking me,” you hissed as he kept you close to him.

“I love the way you’re so wet and the way you clench around me, Baby,” he cooed, seeing your wet juices on his size as you moaned, feeling him suck on your collarbones, “aah… Ooh, Taeyong! Fuck me harder!” You screamed as he pinned you to the table, “fuck, Babygirl! I’ll fuck you good,” he huffed, looking at you deeply as you nodded in desperation. He lifted your legs, placing them on his shoulders as he fucked in this new position. 

He kept plunging into your pussy as you were screaming in pleasure, “ahh! Aah! Taeyong! Taeyong!” He lowered himself to make out with you, “such a good girl, keep screaming my name like that, Beautiful,” he embraced you closely and started panting into your ear. You were sweating and panting like crazy, never had you been fucked this good before except for yesterday…

“You okay?” Taeyong hissed, looking directly into your eyes as you nodded too dazed to even reply. You closed your eyes as he made out with you, his kisses left you so needy and greedy for him. And his thrusts felt so amazing, the way he moved inside was bliss to you. He placed your legs down as you instead wrapped them around his butt, he groaned loudly.

You weren’t sure of what to feel right now, professor Lee Taeyong was bringing you nothing but joy and pleasure. This man you once hated was making you feel so wanted and desired. You couldn’t help but simply enjoy this.

Your mouth was agape as you didn’t realize you were cumming all over him, “my, what a beautiful sight, Babygirl~” Taeyong hummed in pure amusement as you looked down before blushing red, “s-sorry…” you mumbled, seeing your juices drip down his legs as he chuckled, “mhm, what are you sorry for?” He lifted you as you sat up on the table, facing him, “for making such a wet mess on you… and for cumming first…” You muttered as he kissed you, “mhm, don’t be sorry, I like seeing you cum first that way I know I’m doing a good job of pleasing you.” He confessed as you nodded, a few seconds passed as you felt something hot squirt inside you.

“Aah…!” You winced, feeling him release his orgasm inside of your pussy, “fuck,” Taeyong moaned, placing his hands on the table as you hugged him, “o-ooh professor…” You felt more of his semen fill you up, “y-you really came inside me?” He rested his head on your shoulder as he embraced you, “sorry, I could barely keep it in,” he pulled out and sat down on the swivel chair, panting heavily, “sorry… I should’ve pulled out,” he breathed as you watched his semen seep out of your pussy and thought for a bit.

How could you let this happen…? Letting your very own professor fucking nut inside you?!

You grabbed onto the end of the table and panted heavily before poking the inside of your cheek. You looked at him and huffed, his tongue stuck out of his mouth as he nervously ran his hands through his black hair with blue highlights.

My, Taeyong looks so dangerously hot all dazed from cumming in you…

“Mmh… you perverted asshole,” you cussed at him as his eyes widened, “sorry, Y/N, I’m sorry,” Taeyong mumbled, rolling over to the desk in the corner as he opened the bottom drawer to grab a packet of wet wipes. “I swear that I didn’t mean to do it on purpose…” He returned to the table and said, completely ashamed. “Mmh… really?” you huffed, crossing your arms.

He’s so cute being so polite and apologetic about this. You’re truly a menace for secretly enjoying torturing him like this.

“I am, I’m truly sorry,” Taeyong repeated as he began wiping your thighs clean, you pursed your lips. “It’s alright, professor Taeyong.” You muttered, watching him wipe your pussy clean, “I’ll take a pill later,” you hummed when he finished cleaning you as you felt so deeply cared for. “Mhm, I’ll buy you one.” He smiled and looked at you, “you’re not mad at me, are you?” He asked and cupped your cheek, you kissed him, “of course not, I can’t be mad at you, professor,” you pouted your lips as he chuckled.

“You had me worried for a sec, you weren’t saying anything after I kept apologizing to you,” Taeyong huffed, placing his hands on the table as you hugged him close, “it’s because…” You bit your bottom lip, whispering into his ear. “It sorta felt good when you came inside me, Taeyong,” he closed his eyes and smirked, hearing your reply.

“Oh really?” Taeyong pulled back and looked at you, you nodded as he cupped your face before kissing you. “Mhm-mhm, see that’s what I like about you, Beautiful,” he patted your hair as you blushed and giggled, “I like you too, Taeyong,” You hummed happily as he scoffed, “you do?” He asked, wiping himself as you blushed. “Of course I do,” you confessed, stroking your hair, “what is there not to like about you, silly,” you giggled. “Mhm, tell me then, tell me what you like about me, Y/N,” he demanded and wore his boxers.

“Mmh, you’re so handsome, clever, and super cool,” you dangled your feet as Taeyong smirked, “mhm, what more?” He mused, he put on his unbuttoned shirt as you pulled him by the tie, twirling it around your wrist as you finally gripped it. “You’re good at being in control and fucking me with that big cock of yours,” you licked your lips and patted his torso. “Mhm, good answer, Baby,” he cooed, patting your hair as you smiled. “Mmh, professor~” you called as he held you close.

“Mhm what is it, Baby?~” He leaned in, kissing you, “mmh, you have cool and interesting tattoos, Taeyong.” You hummed, cuddling him as he kissed you softly, “mhm, you think so, Babygirl?” You nodded, kissing the ‘rude boy’ tattoo on his shoulder as he chuckled. “You too, Babygirl~ the hibiscus and pink rose tattoos on either side of your hip bones look fucking sexy and beautiful.” He lowered his head, kissing your rose tattoo as you giggled a bit.

“Must’ve hurt like crazy getting them, huh?” He huffed, placing deep kisses on your abdomen as you ran your hands through his hair, “mmh, I felt like I was going to die,” you hissed, feeling him suck on your hip bone.

“Mhm, wish we could stay like this forever,” you hummed, feeling him kiss your pussy as you threw your head back, “me too, Babygirl,” he licked your clit and smirked at you. “What is this meeting about?” You asked as he picked up your panties from the floor, helping you put them on, “just a meeting between new professors and faculty.” Taeyong said, helping you close your bra as he was staring at your breasts, “how boring,” you rolled your eyes before wrapping your hands around his neck, “mhm, I know,” he placed a few kisses on your lips as he stroked your back, “–mmh… I gotta go and help out in the library,” you muttered while he licked your neck before giving you a deep passionate kiss.

“–Understood, get going then,” Taeyong said, closing the buttons on your shirt as you bent over to pick up your skirt. He gawked at your ass and groped it, “you’ve such a nice ass, you know that?~” He cooed, patting your ass as you whined before smirking, “of course I do,” you replied cockingly as he squeezed it, “mhm, what a bold woman,” he scoffed as you turned around before pulling you in a tight hug.

You smiled at the way he embraced you, you sat on the table, “do you like me a lot, professor?” You hummed, crossing your legs and leaning back slightly, “mhm, of course, I do,” he confessed, rubbing your breast and causing a little moan from you. “What do you like about me?” You licked your lips as he stood up, “lots of things,” he groaned, feeling you rub and stroke his cock, “–what things, tell me,” you cooed, rubbing your knee against him, “your beauty and your voice,” you got off the table and stood. He smirked, gently slipping his hand under your skirt to squeeze your ass. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders and kissed him, slowly making out with him.

“Mhm, we should stop before we start fucking the whole evening here, Baby,” Taeyong whispered, looking into your lustful eyes. “Mmh, it’s your fault… You make me so needy for you,” you hummed, letting go of him as he chuckled.

He stood up and began dressing himself. “So beautiful, it’s for good luck, hmm?” Taeyong cooed, looking at your right wrist’s green four-leaf clover tattoo in admiration, “mhm, I got this tiny four clover for good luck and good fortunes in the future.” You hummed, kissing his bird tattoo on his shoulder, “mmh, but your tattoos are even more beautiful and so unique.” You nodded, wearing your bra as he smiled softly, “mhm, I’m getting a new one soon, wanna come along?” He cooed, fixing his blazer and buckling his belt, “I’d love to, professor,” you smiled before kissing him as you were fully dressed.

“About the exams…” You mumbled, tugging some hair behind your ear. “Don’t worry about it, seeing how much you’ve improved since the last test. I’m sure you’ll pass it.” Taeyong smiled, fixing his tie as you tied your hair in a bun, “if you’ve any questions just text me,” he cooed, handing you his number on a tiny piece of paper as you blushed a bit. “Thank you. Right, I’ll get going then, see you next time professor Lee.” You blew a kiss and left as he chuckled, “such a fine woman.” He smirked when he just noticed your back tattoo.

You headed to the library and greeted Mr. Jeong, “ah there she is Miss Yonsei,” Mr. Jeong chuckled, pushing the cart with books. “Hello Sir, so where do you want me to start?” You asked and placed your hands on your hips, taking a glance at the shelves. “You can take this cart and just return these English literature books on shelf number 6.” He said as you nodded, pushing the cart. You saw the empty top row of the shelf 6. You grabbed 3 books and moved the ladder to the left. You started going up, gently placing each book.

About 30 minutes had passed as you were at a different shelf, removing some books. “–Careful you don’t fall, Miss,” a man said as you turned to look down, “ah professor Lee,” you said with a soft smile and small bow. Taeyong took a quick look left and right before holding his hand out to you, “thank you, professor,” you said, holding his hand as you carefully stepped down the ladder. You placed the books in the cart and started pushing it. “Well, if it isn’t Taeyong-Hyung,” Mr. Jeong said with a sly smile, “ah hello, Jaehyun-ssi,” Taeyong waved, and the two guys looked at each other.

Taeyong must be popular and friends with every faculty member, huh…?

“I’m all done with the tasks, Mr. Jeong,” you said and bowed, “good job, I knew that I could count on you, Miss Yonsei,” Jaehyun smiled, proudly patting your shoulder as Taeyong looked at his hand on your shoulder. “Tasks? That’s new, Jaehyun, you’re usually not the type to find tasks in the library too difficult.” He scoffed, and you pursed your lips at the sheer jealousy in Taeyong’s tone.

“Mhm, I like a bit of company - besides Miss Yonsei and I had a lot of fun talking about the US,” Jaehyun said and folded his arms, “isn’t that right, Miss?” He looked at you, “ah yes, Mr. Jeong and I are a great library team,” you smiled as Taeyong poked the inside of his cheek. “Anyways, I’m very sorry but I need to go now or else I’m going to miss my hair appointment!” You bowed and ran out of the library, covering your smile from literally busting into laughter at the sight of Taeyong’s tense jealousy.

You just finished getting your hair done. Now you were home and you changed into your black tight low-waisted shorts, attaching your black laced stockings and a white button-up shirt, you wore your red lipstick as you pursed your lips. “What a gorgeous woman,” you pointed at yourself in the mirror and smirked before taking a few selfies. You grabbed your tote bag and left your apartment. On the way out you uploaded the pictures onto your Instagram with the caption ‘the office’s baddest bit**’. You giggled, putting your phone away as you got on the subway.

“Hello everyone,” you waved, walking into the main office and greeting your colleagues, “hello~ Y/N-ah,” Nayeon smiled and greeted you with a back hug, “you look so pretty today, Ms. Park,” Mina steepled, glancing at your somewhat daring outfit. “Ah, Park-ssi is here,” Momo hummed, lowering her glasses to take a quick glimpse at you. “Wah, so beautiful, hair done and everything, very chic,” she nodded as you twirled your hair, “thank you all, ehehe~” you giggled.

“You all seem to be extra hardworking today,” you replied, placing your tote bag on top of your table as Nayeon went back to her desk, “oh yeah, today’s client is extremely important,” she added, checking her computer as Momo nodded, “yup, it’s Boss Nakamoto’s high school friend,” Mina smiled, “Sakurada Dori, also a very famous actor in Japan.” Momo winked as they all giggled.

What’s the big deal with this Dori guy anyway…?

You shrugged your shoulders as Yuta walked out, greeting you before calling you to his office. You admired his back as you blushed a little, seeing him hold the door for you. You sat in the chair in front of his desk as Yuta sat down in his swivel chair. “As you’ve heard already, we’ll be having an important client today, so don’t screw up or throw a fit, okay?” He steepled his hands, looking at you, “alright, I understand, Nakamoto-nim,” you nodded, smacking your lips. You tugged some hair behind your ear, hoping he’d notice your new hairstyle.

“–Anyways, please help Ms. Im and Mr. Watanabe with our newest advertisement,” Yuta commanded as your mouth was left agape by his dismissive attitude. “Yes Sir, um excuse me, Nakamoto-nim?” You muttered, twirling your hair around your finger as you leaned forward, placing a hand on his desk. 

“Yes, Ms. Park?” Yuta averted his eyes, adjusting his glasses, and looked up for a second. “Do you notice anything different about me today?” You hummed, smiling and stroking the blonde highlights in your hair as he scoffed. 

“You’re wearing a very daring outfit today,” he huffed cockingly, “–but at least it isn’t see-through or translucent. Good job.” Yuta replied shortly as he went back to focus on his paperwork.

What the actual fuck? Is he this dense? How come he hasn’t noticed your new hairstyle!?

“–Never mind, Sir,” you sulked, getting up from your seat as you left his office. Holy shit, this man is so stupid, are Japanese men really this dense?! You sighed heavily and walked down the hall to the vending machine.

Yuta smirked and let out a small chuckle. “Such a silly woman,” he clicked his tongue. The blonde highlights with that long black hair suits her, how alluring.

“Oh what’s wrong, Ms. Park?” Mr. Watanabe asked concerningly and patted your shoulder, “nothing, I just can’t believe that men can be so dense and stupid,” you huffed sassily, grabbing your can of iced coffee from the vending machine.

“Wah, you really think so?” He chuckled as you opened your can of iced coffee, “no, I mean not you, Mr. Watanabe,” you felt flustered as he laughed, “just kidding, Ms. Park,” he laughed, grabbing his iced tea, “also, you look great with the blonde highlights in your hair.” He added before walking down the hall, “th-thank you, Mr. Watanabe,” you smiled and blushed a little, “oh please, just call me Haruto, no need to be so formal around me,” he chuckled. “But Mr. Watanabe you’re my superior, and I don’t want to seem rude–” you mumbled, following him to the conference room.

“You’re not being rude, Ms. Y/N,” he smiled and held the door open for you, “Ms. Y/N?” Nayeon repeated as you both entered, “what’s up with that, Mr. Watanabe?” She raised an eyebrow and cupped her cheek. “I guess Koreans really care about formality, huh?” Haruto chuckled, sitting down, “well, yeah, the Korean society is built on hierarchy and status,” you replied, sitting down and opening your pencil case.

“Sorry, me and Ms. Y/N were just discussing formality within the workspace,” Haruto told Nayeon as she shook her head. “You two always have strange conversations,” she sighed and got up, giggling.

“Alright, so the next commercial is L’oreal Paris,” Nayeon presented on the notice board, you nodded, noting down some ideas. “So the Boss wanted us to find an actress or a female idol to be in this commercial,” Mr. Watanabe said, checking his stacks of papers. “I see, hmm, let me check the internet,” you hummed, searching on the internet. “How about we have Park Gyuri from KARA–” you suggested when the door suddenly burst open.

“–Hey, hey, Nayeon-ah, he’s here!” Momo squealed, pointing in a certain direction, “omg, let me see!” Nayeon immediately got up to peek at the door, “well, here we go, all ladies are crazy for someone like Dori-chan,” Haruto sighed heavily before looking at you, but you were too busy checking your phone as you texted Yeonwoo, “hey! Are you even listening to me, Ms. Park,” he whined as you drew your attention back to him, “yeah sorry, Mr. Haruto, I was trying to find a female idol with the help of my friend, she used to be featured in plenty of drama series,” you explained briefly.

“It’s been a while, Ani,” Yuta said before greeting Mr. Sakurada Dori with a handshake and a small side hug, “it sure has been, this office has changed a bit since I was last here, hmm?” He hummed as he looked around, noticing the wall design and the windows.

“Konnichiwa, Sakurada-san,” Mina bowed and flashed a small smile at him. “I see, so it’s still the kind, pretty, and familiar faces working here,” Dori bowed too and smiled, “it's an honor to be working with you again, Sakurada-san,” Momo walked in and bowed, shaking his hand while blushing slightly.

“Annyeong, Sakurada-ssi,” Nayeon waved as she left the room to greet him, “well, seems like the party has started, let’s go and greet Dori-san too,” Haruto said as you nodded still texting Yeonwoo while exiting the room - only to be met with a surprise. There stood a tall, handsome Japanese man. Your mouth was agape as you simply stared at him. “Yo Dori-san, long time no see,” Haruto waved as they greeted and smiled at each other.

Holy shit… This is Dori Sakurada? This hottie is Nakamoto Yuta’s high school friend?!

“Oh, a new face, who’s this cute lady?” He smiled as you bowed. Cute…? Does this handsome gentleman think I’m cute? Your lips formed into a small smile, earning such a compliment was enough to put you in a chipper mood. “Hello, my name’s Park Y/N,” you bowed deeply, “it’s nice to meet you, Sir,” you said, still amazed by his presence. Nayeon stood next to Momo and winked. 

“Ms. Park, this is Sakurada Dori, a very important person to our company and a good friend of mine,” Yuta said as you nodded immediately, “ah I see! Sir, Mr. Sakurada, please after you,” you replied, holding the door open for him, “thank you Ms. Park,” Mr. Sakurada smiled, walking inside, “please treat him well,” Yuta added, Nayeon and Haruto walked inside as he closed the door.

“Right, so have you two considered an actress or female idol you could feature in this L’Oreal commercial?” Mr. Sakurada asked, checking his iPad as Watanabe started talking, “not quite, but Ms. Park is on the case, right?” He looked at you, “ah yes,” you smiled and nodded.

“Nakamoto-nim, it’s Park,” you knocked on the door, “come in,” you walked inside, holding a cup of coffee and locking the door, “what is it?” Yuta demanded, lowering his eyeglasses as he took a glimpse at you. “Well, since you’re working so hard I thought I’d bring you a cup of coffee,” you hummed, leaning against his desk as he nodded, “appreciate the thought, how’s the progress with the advertisement–?” You walked around his desk to give him a back hug. “–What are you doing?” He asked, looking at your arms resting around his neck as you leaned close to his cheek.

“–Why are you so cold? It’s just us two in here anyways,” you muttered, placing a kiss on his cheek, “mhm, I see,” Yuta scoffed before smirking, “what’s so funny?” You asked sassily before hugging him, he chuckled and patted your hand. “I must’ve banged you so good yesterday that you couldn’t forget about me, huh?” He huffed proudly as you blushed red and immediately let go of him, crossing your arms as you irked at his remark. “You’re so full of yourself, Nakamoto-nim,” you frowned as he began laughing a little. “Come onto my lap then, Princess,” he clapped his lap as you turned his chair and sat on it without hesitation.

“Nakamoto-nim, mmh~” you hummed, locking your arms around his shoulders as he looked at you in admiration. “Are you seeing someone else, Doll?” Yuta moved your hair to see a small visible hickey as you got nervous. “Will you be mad if I am…?” You fluttered your eyes innocently as he chuckled, “mhm, not really, I don’t care the slightest,” he scoffed, stroking the blonde strands of your hair as you pouted at his careless response, “–you know why?” He whispered into your ear and traced his thumb with your lips, “why…?” You mumbled, looking down at his thumb.

“–Because no one fucks you better than I do, Doll,” Yuta scoffed cockingly as you blushed red, “–you…!” You pouted and got completely flustered, grabbing a fistful of his shirt. “Mhm, what’s with that face?” He raised an eyebrow and scoffed, you stared at him.

This man is so fucking full of himself, isn’t he the slightest jealous? Man, whatever, his confident and careless personality is what I like the most about him anyway.

You leaned in before suddenly stopping. “–You want a kiss?” Yuta cooed, seeing you pursed your lips eagerly as you stared at him needily. “You’re so awful…” You furrowed your eyebrows as he chuckled before kissing you, “mhm, you think your Boss is a meanie?” He cupped your cheek, you remained silent and kissed him again, “mmh, no comment.” You crossed your arms as he stared at your chest, poking the inside of his cheek.

“I saw that,” you said, lifting yourself onto his desk, “not my fault, you’re so pretty, Princess,” Yuta mused and smirked at you, “am I just a pretty face to you?” You asked, “get back to work, Park, we’ll talk later.” He pointed at the door, waving his hand and signaling you to leave. You rolled your eyes and got off his desk, “understood, Nakamoto-nim.” You left his office.

“–Y/N-ssi, come here,” Nayeon called, waving her hand as she was seated near a table with Ms. Momo, Mr. Haruto, and Mr. Dori. “So Y/N-ssi here suggested that we should get Park Gyuri for this commercial, what do you think, Mr. Sakurada?” She asked, leaning forward eagerly you walked up to them when a strange unknown number showed on your phone screen, the display left a sour expression on your face.

“–Please, excuse me I have to take this call,” you bowed several times before excusing yourself. You headed up to the outdoors rooftop. The number was still calling you even after rejecting and hanging up for the 8th time now. You took a deep breath before finally answering. “–What is it now?” You replied coldly as you heard a soft chuckle. “You really haven’t changed, still a brat with no sense of discipline or respect–”

“–I have discipline and I do respect people, just not when it’s you, Appa.” You interrupted your dad as he scoffed, “that disgusting attitude is just like your stupid mother.” He huffed, “stop calling and bothering me if you’re just going to fucking nag at me!” You yelled as he sighed, “send me some money and I might stop calling you.” Your dad snickered as you exhaled in deep disappointment and frustration.

You knew this to be far from the truth, now and then he’ll always find your contact information or your email. Scolding you, verbally abusing you, and guilt-tripping you into giving him money so that he won’t interfere with you or your personal life. Even after paying for him countless times, he never keeps his word or promises that he will actually stay away from you.

“Please… Please just stop, Appa, I won’t give you any more money. I had enough of all this.” You stammered, lowering your head as you looked over the tall buildings. Your dad remained silent for a slight moment. “There’s no point in speaking to me or trying to financially manipulate me again anymore. I’m an adult now, so I don’t want to keep in touch with you. Don’t ever call me again.” You hung up and blocked the number, crouching down in defeat. Tears formed in your eyes as you hugged your knees when the wind blew smoke in your direction, you quickly wiped your tears away as Yuta stood nearby smoking. You accidentally made eye contact with him as he exhaled the smoke, you stood up and began walking towards the exit.

“Ms. Park, are you a smoker too?” Yuta asked, walking as he stopped right in front of you. “No, I don’t smoke cigarettes,” you replied coldly, rubbing your elbow. “Please excuse me, Nakamoto-nim but I have to get back to work,” you said and bowed politely before walking down to the office. He looked at you heading down before exhaling.

One part of you wanted to tell him how you felt and that you needed a hug, but another part of you didn’t want to be a burden and ask for others to pity you.

You walked down and saw Momo and Nayeon seated at their respective desks, doing paperwork, they flashed you a smile as you smiled back. “–So Miss Park, you talked about featuring this certain actress for the advertisement?” Mr. Sakurada sat next to you, holding his iPad and checking the beauty products for marketing. You looked over and nodded, “yes Sir, I was thinking maybe Ms. Park Gyuri from KARA,” you spoke while smiling slightly.

“Ms. Myoui, the Boss wants to have a word with you,” Haruto said, pointing to Yuta’s office. “Yes, I’ll be there in a second,” Mina stood up from her desk as she walked over to you. “Hey, Ms. Park, here I know you really like these,” Ms. Myoui said, placing a small bag of Japanese potato chips on your desk as you thanked her with a small bow. “Thank you, Ms. Myoui,” you smiled and appreciated her kindness. Dori looked over as she walked inside his office.

“You wanted to talk to me, Boss?” Mina closed the door as Yuta turned his swivel chair to face her, “yes, I want to ask you to do me a favor, please,” he said, steepling his hands together. “What is it, Boss?” She crossed her arms and stood in front of his desk. “Please keep an eye on Ms. Park, she seemed rather off, and upset when I stumbled upon her earlier on the rooftop area.” He voiced in concern, thinking about you.

“I see, I got it Boss, don’t worry,” Mina bowed. “Thank you Ms. Myoui, I knew I could count on you, “I’ll take my leave, Boss, then.” She said and left his office.

A few hours had passed…

“Alright, so I’ve spoken to Ms. Park Gyuri’s manager and she’s available next week on Tuesday, Wednesday, or Friday to film the advertisement,” you said, holding your clipboard to your chest. “Excellent, great work Miss Park,” Mr. Sakurada said, holding his hands together as he smiled at you. “Thank you, Sir, it’s an honor to be working with you on this great project,” you bowed deeply and smiled as Yuta walked out of his office.

“Ah, Yuta, I believe we should discuss the appointment with Ms. Park Gyuri,” Mr. Sakurada said to Yuta as they bowed, he nodded, “–if it’s not too urgent, may I suggest we talk over the phone, Dori-Ani?” He put on his coat while holding an umbrella when Mr. Sakurada folded his arms, “I see, you must have planned something with your daughter,” he nodded and smiled. “Alright Yuta, let’s discuss the matter over the phone then,” Yuta bowed and thanked him. You made slight eye contact with him as you bowed, seeing him walk past you.

“Great work today everyone, I’ll see you all tomorrow,” Yuta waved, walking away from the office, “say hi to little Yuka for us,” Momo waved and smiled, seeing him leave.

You felt a little weird, seeing him leave the office so soon. It was definitely uncommon for him to be in such a rush. This Yuka girl must mean a lot to him… Should you text him later…? You felt bad for the way you ignored him at the rooftop.

“So where are we eating tonight, Papa?” Yuka asked, opening the door to the passenger seat as she sat, “it’s a surprise, Yuka-chan,” Yuta said, kissing her forehead as she smiled and buckled her seatbelt. He drove off and smiled, looking at the mirror and thinking about you.

Y/N seemed off earlier, but she doesn’t seem to want to talk about it either. I might give her a call afterward. Yuta thought to himself, making a right turn.

Yuka and Yuta entered “Kushikatsu Kushien” restaurant, “good evening, reservation for Mr. Nakamato, please,” he bowed as the waiter bowed back and nodded, “yes, please follow me, Sir,” Yuka followed her father to a small table in the corner, “mmm, did you really have to make a reservation for this type of restaurant, Papa?” She sat and cupped her cheek, looking around. “I know back in Osaka, you can just drop by in these types of restaurants. But since we’re in Seoul and right around 6 PM is the hour when lots of customers enter.” He explained briefly as she nodded.

“I see, I wonder if their Kushikatsu is as good as Osaka’s,” Yuka hummed, “what do you want to drink?” Yuta asked, pointing at the menu cart, “I’ll go with strawberry Ramune, are you going for a beer, Papa?” She snickered as he shook his head, “no way, I’m not drinking when I’m our designated driver, Yuka-chan~” he chuckled in teasing manners as she giggled. “I’ll take the Coca-Cola.” He smiled and poked her forehead.

“So is Uncle Dori in Seoul?” Yuka steepled her hands, leaning forward as he nodded, “yeah, he arrived here a few days ago, today was his first day at the office,” he explained, “what kinds of skewers would you like, Yuka-chan?” Yuta asked, “mmm, let’s go for chicken, shrimp, and vegetable skewers,” she hummed and folded her arms as the waiter walked over, “are you ready to order Miss and Mister?” He asked, holding his notebook. “We would like to have 4 pieces of chicken skewers, 2 shrimp skewers, 2 zucchini skewers, 2 pumpkin skewers, and 3 quail eggs skewers, please,” Yuta said as the waiter quickly noted it down, “thank you, Miss, and Mister, can I offer you something to drink in the meantime?”

“Yes, please, one Coca-Cola for Papa and one strawberry Ramune for me, thank you,” Yuka replied and bowed, “understood, Miss, I’ll be right back,” he bowed and left. “Man, you’re right a lot of customers come here right at this time!” She looked around to see the whole restaurant’s tables filled with customers. “Mhm, your Papa’s very clever by making a reservation in this informal restaurant, huh?” Yuta smirked cockingly as she scoffed sassily, “right, I suppose Papa’s right this time,” she rolled her eyes before chuckling, the waiter came back and placed the drinks on the table.

“I miss Japan,” Yuka sighed, looking at him, “mhm, you miss your mother?” Yuta asked as he looked into her eyes as she avoided it, “not really, I like being and staying with you more, Papa,” she mumbled and pouted, he chuckled before ruffling her bangs. “Mhm, don’t say that she probably misses you a lot, Yuka-chan,” he added, smiling at her as she looked to her left side. “Probably, but I really want to go to Osaka and stay with Grandma,” she hummed, tapping her finger on the table as he chuckled. “Mhm, I see, when do you want to go to Japan?” He asked, checking his phone for flights while taking a sip from his Coca-Cola.

“You’re going with one of your friends right?” Yuta asked, looking at her, “mmm, maybe Chisa or Jurin, they have to get permission from their parents first, Papa,” Yuka pouted and nodded. “That’s true they don’t have a cool and chill Papa like me,” he chuckled and smirked, “Papa, you’re so full of yourself,” she crossed her arms and let out a soft scoff as the waiter placed the food down, “here are your skewers, enjoy,” the waiter said and bowed, “thank you so much,” she smiled and bowed.

“Itadakimasu!” Yuka said before grabbing a zucchini skewer and taking a bite. “How’s school lately, been doing okay with your classes?” Yuta asked, eating a chicken skewer as she hummed and nodded, “it’s been okay, I just need help with my English, I got a -C on my last English test…” She pouted, looking down as he patted her shoulder, “that’s okay, as long as you tried your best that’s all that really matters, Sweetie,” he smiled softly as she nodded and giggled, “I’ll always do my best, Papa!” Yuka smiled.

“Can I sleep at Jurin’s house tonight?” Yuka asked as Yuta parked the car, “did you two plan this, or is it all of a sudden?” He asked, opening the car door and helping her step out. “Jurin’s mother has a late shift tonight and she is staying with her nanny Lim. Jurin says that her mother is okay with me sleeping over,” he unlocked the door and held it as she walked inside, “mhm, it’s 8:30 PM,” he pushed the elevator button, “–you’ll have to pack your PJs and school uniform then if you want to have a sleepover.” He hummed as he walked inside the elevator, and she followed along.

“Yes, Papa, thank you!” Yuka hugged his arm in pure excitement as the elevator went up. Yuta chuckled and ruffled her hair, they exited said elevator and walked inside their apartment. She ran upstairs to pack her clothes, bag, and books. He sat on the couch, checking his phone while waiting for her downstairs. He looked at his contact list, considering if he should text you.

“Don’t stay up too late, I’ll pick you two up tomorrow early morning and then drop you off at school, understood?” Yuta said, before kissing Yuka’s cheek and giving her a small hug. “Mmm-mmm!” Yuka nodded eagerly and hugged Jurin, “hai Nakamoto-san!” Jurin replied as they both nodded, “drive home safe, Mister,” Nanny Lim said and bowed, “I will, thank you. Please look after them, Ms. Lim,” Yuta bowed as she did the same, he walked over to the car and waved before driving off.

“Nee, Yuka-chan, let’s make hot chocolate!” Jurin said, hugging her arm, Yuka nodded. “May we make hot chocolate, nanny Lim?” She asked as Ms. Lim nodded, “of course, let’s get inside and make it, girls.” She smiled as they all went inside.

You had just finished dance practice at the nearby dance studio. Once you exited the building, it started pouring down, “fucking shibal!” You cussed, trying to shield yourself from the rain with your black leather jacket. You walked a few meters when a car pulled up to the sideway, the numberplate seemed similar to you. You stopped walking as the driver walked out, holding a black umbrella. “What’s a stubborn lady doing here cussing in this downpour?” Yuta said before scoffing and holding the umbrella over you. “Nakamoto-nim… Good evening,” you bowed, putting your black leather jacket over your shoulders.

“Let’s go somewhere else, Y/N,” Yuta said, patting your shoulder as he held the car door open. You bowed and sat in the passenger seat, he closed the umbrella and the door then walked to the other side. He opened the door before sitting in the driver’s seat and began driving off.

“Weren’t you having dinner with Miss Yuka?” You asked as he stopped at the red light. “We did and she’s having a sleepover at her friend; Jurin’s house,” Yuta explained briefly as you held his hand, he looked at your hand and smiled. “Want to go to a hotel, Princess?~” He cooed as you nodded immediately while blushing. He drove a few streets down and parked the car.

“What time are your classes tomorrow?” Yuta asked as you walked out of the car, he held the umbrella over the two of you. You held his hand, slightly hugging his arm. “My classes start at 10:30 AM,” you whispered, looking around the fancy lobby, “–I’ll have to leave at 7:30 AM, I need to drop Yuka and Jurin at school tomorrow, just make sure to check out by 9:15 AM.” He said, closing the umbrella as you nodded. You two walked inside the hotel’s reception.

“I’d like to book a luxury room for tonight, check out tomorrow by 9:15 AM.” Yuta told the receptionist as she nodded, “right, your room number is 169 on the 4th floor.” She handed him the keycard, and you two walked to the elevator. “Sorry for my rude behavior on the rooftop earlier…” You mumbled as the elevator went up, “no need to apologize,” he placed a hand on your right shoulder before pulling you closer. “Gosh, you’re so cold, Princess,” he chuckled as you giggled, “I thought I was hot, I just finished dance practice.”

Yuta swiped the keycard and held the door as you went inside and took your heels off. “Did you eat dinner?” He asked, taking his coat off and hanging it on the coat rack. “I had a sandwich from 7/11. Do you mind if I take a shower first?” You asked, taking off your black leather jacket as he sat on the lean chair, “I don’t mind, go ahead, I’ll order us something nice, Princess,” he smiled, dialing the phone.

You went inside and started to undress, you took a warm bath and washed yourself thoroughly with the coconut-scented bar of soap. Nakamoto-nim’s so thoughtful, I really wanna make him happy tonight. You finished showering and dried yourself with the mini towel. Never knew that Nakamoto-nim would have a daughter… He’s so full of surprises.

You walked out, wearing the white bathrobe. “–Yeah, Dori-Ani, I think Wednesday at 3:45 PM. I mean, maybe we should book a small appointment on Friday too?” Yuta spoke on the phone while standing on the balcony, smoking. You walked out, hugging him from behind as he looked over his shoulder and smiled at you. I told myself to keep a distance from Y/N and to not make things more complicated for us all… Yet, here I am still wanting to be by her side.

“Well Dori-Ani, how about we discuss it further tomorrow morning?” Yuta said, exhaling as he turned around you stood on your tippy toes to kiss him. “Mhm, I’ve to hang up, Ani… Something urgent came up–” he hung up and tossed his cigarette into the cigarette trash can.

“Mhm, that was a quick shower, Doll” Yuta hummed, carrying you in his arms as he sat on the couch, you were on his lap as you wrapped your arms around him before kissing him deeply. “Did you order room service?” You whispered, looking into his eyes as he nodded, averting his eyes to the table with different kinds of packets of beverages.

“What do you want to drink?” He asked, turning the kettle on as you kissed him. “Hot chocolate, please,” you slowly slid the bathrobe off your shoulders, revealing yourself in a clean lime green sports bra and black Kuromi panties. “Mhm, aren’t you cold?” He nudged your ass as you bit your lips, rubbing your hand underneath his shirt.

“I’m not cold when I’m on such a fine man’s lap~” You pursed your lips and locked your hands around his neck before slowly kissing him, “mhm, mhm, Princess,” Yuta hummed and smirked, watching you unbutton his shirt in amusement. “–Before we continue this, mind telling me about what exactly happened earlier on the rooftop?” He demanded, pulling back as he looked into your eyes you blinked your eyes a few times.

“Do I really have to…? I mean I already apologized to you, Nakamoto-nim…” You pouted, “mhm, Y/N, Doll. I’m not referring to your dismissive attitude.” He pulled you by the chin. “–I’m talking about why you were crouched down and all teary when I approached you,” Yuta scoffed as he patted your lower back. “…” You remained silent, looking down before speaking up. “I was on the phone with my Appa… Okay?” You explained, looking at him anxiously.

“I see, it must’ve been something serious and personal, correct?” Yuta asked, pouring hot water into the two cups filled with cocoa powder. You got off his lap and sat next to him on the couch. “No… It’s rather stupid and embarrassing. But I can trust you, right, Nakamoto-nim?” You asked, looking into his eyes as you held his hand.

“I’m all ears, don’t worry you’re safe with me but don’t feel obligated to tell me if you don’t want to, Princess,” Yuta reassured, caressing your hand. You took a deep sigh before starting to speak. “Appa and I are estranged. He and I don’t get along so that’s one of the reasons why I live on my own. He has a gambling addiction and is an alcoholic. It was so bad that I couldn’t live with him anymore.” You explained as your voice stammered a little.

“At first he would call to ask how I was doing before his drinking addiction worsened. But then his calls started to center around if could send him money or lend him money. He would always emotionally abuse me and manipulate me.”

“Even after changing my phone number multiple times, he’d always find a way to get a hold of me. If I don’t answer his stupid calls, he will go to my university to try and find me. To show them that I’m a horrible daughter for not taking care of her father, his phone calls are just him yelling and scolding me.” You gritted your teeth as tears started to run down your cheeks.

“I’m just tired of always hearing him nag and constantly belittling and degrading me,” you cried, wiping the tears away from your eyes. “S-Sorry…” You mumbled, “it’s fucking pathetic…” You whimpered, rubbing your eyes as Yuta hugged you closely. He patted your shoulder as he wiped the tears away with a napkin. “I’m so sorry, Y/N.” He said, looking into your eyes as he cupped your face before touching your forehead with his.

“He doesn’t deserve to be a part of your life if he’s such an asshole and terrible father to you, Y/N.” You looked down. “He doesn’t deserve your tears,” you looked up and felt a form of relief hearing those comforting words from Yuta. “Thank you for understanding me… Nakamoto-nim,” you nodded as he caressed your hair, you moved closer and kissed him passionately. He smiled, receiving those kisses from you. “Mhm, Princess,” he cooed, holding onto your lower back as you completely removed your bathrobe, letting it fall to the floor as you cupped his face and started to make out with him.

“You’re so dangerously hot, Nakamoto-nim…” You sighed, feeling him place kisses on your collarbones as Yuta smirked. “Mhm, not as hot as you,” he smirked, watching you lie down he lowered himself to leave kisses on your stomach. You looked down and blushed, “Nakamoto-nim…” You called, caressing his hair as you felt his kisses on your hip bone and abdomen.

“Please make me feel good tonight…” You pleaded as Yuta made eye contact with you, “I will, don’t worry, Princess.” He said holding your hand as he went down on you, feeling him cuddle your hip bone tattoos as he kissed them, you patted his hair and let out a small whine. He left a very visible hickey on your left hip bone and smiled at you.

“Really love that gorgeous hibiscus tattoo of yours, Princess,” Yuta scoffed, gently rubbing it as you hummed, watching him get on top of you again, “love it even more when you leave hickies on me, Nakamoto-nim,” you locked your wrists around his neck as he kissed you deeply. “Boss is going to treat you very special tonight,” he whispered into your ear as you blushed, seeing him carry you in bridal style as he gently placed you on the bed.

He slowly started to make out with you. “Ooh Nakamoto-nim…” You sighed, his kisses were getting hotter and deeper, you swirled your tongue around his and looked into his eyes as he huffed. “Ooh, ahh…” You moaned, seeing the mixed saliva drip from both of your chins.

Yuta’s eyes focused on yours then dropped to your cleavage, you quickly noticed and pulled his head to your chest. “M-Mmh, ooh Nakamoto-nim…” You whined, feeling his face cuddle your breasts. His hands slid under your back, unclasping your bra’s lock. He removed your bra and gently tugged it away on the nightstand, a happy smirk was stuck on his lips.

“Mmh~” You huffed and let both of your arms rest on either side of the bed as he smiled at the sight of your exposed breasts. “Goodness, they’re so fucking amazing, Princess,” Yuta cooed, fondling and feeling your breasts as you closed your eyes and furrowed your eyebrows. “Perfectly perky and round for me, mhm?” He cooed, rubbing your nipples with his thumbs.

“Ahh… Aah,” you moaned, feeling him rub circles around your nipples, “they’re so beautiful, Doll,” Yuta whispered before placing a kiss on your lips, “you really think so…?” You asked, blushing at his compliments as he nodded immediately before kissing your left nipple. “They’re so lovely, round and so soft, it makes me go crazy,” he cooed before swallowing it and sucking on it. You moaned at the physical contact of his warm and wet tongue to your sensitive nipple. You pulled a fistful of his hair as he fondled and squeezed your right breast. “Your lips feel so great, aah…” You moaned loudly as he kept playing with your breasts, you could feel the slight steaminess in your panties.

You looked into Yuta’s eyes, fluttering them and clearly indicating that you were needy. “Ooh Yuta, mmh, mmh,” you hummed in between his kisses, “how do you feel, Princess?” Yuta whispered, sliding his hand into your panties as you felt his palm rubbing up and down on your pussy. “I-I feel good, please don’t stop touching me…” You whined and ground against his palm as he pressed hot kisses on your neck.

“I like it when you touch me like that, I feel so good,” you panted as Yuta made out with you. “Tonight, just let me take care of everything, okay?” He whispered as you nodded eagerly and watched him closely as he pulled back. You looked down as he held onto the waistband of your panties, slowly undressing you. “Mhm, mhm, you’re giving me so many kisses, Princess,” he cooed, seeing how you were constantly smooching his lips. 

Yuta reached for the nightstand, grabbing a condom while unbuckling his belt. He removed his boxers and sighed, rolling the condom on his dick. He climbed over you, “Yuta…” You said, wrapping your arms around his neck. He placed a few soft kisses on your breasts, “aah, Yuta… Ahh…” You moaned, feeling him suck on your hardened nipple.

Yuta held onto your ass, maintaining small eye contact with you. “I’m going in, okay?” He whispered into your ear as you nodded desperately. “Just go in one push, I can handle it, Nakamoto-nim…” You pleaded and cupped his face, he pressed his lips together and lowered himself onto you. He carefully inserted all of his dick inside your pussy. He looked at your stomach and then at your eyes. “My such a needy woman you are tonight.”

“Nngh… A-ahh!” You moaned, grasping onto his back as Yuta groaned and panted a bit, “you okay, Princess?” He whispered, you nodded, moaning as he started to move. “Y-You’re so filling, Nakamoto-nim…” You smiled in relief, holding onto his shoulders as a tiny tear appeared in your left eye. You wrapped your left leg around him as he groaned.

“Your pussy’s always so good to me, Doll,” Yuta scoffed, moving in and out of your pussy as you moaned. “I love your dick so much, Nakamoto-nim…!” You screamed in pleasure as he smirked before making out with you, “mhm, still formal with your Boss even in the bedroom, mhm?” He cooed as you blushed red, “such a good girl, you really love my dick, huh?” He scoffed, slipping in and out of your pussy while you nodded eagerly.

He put his lips on yours, casually making out with you. He slipped his tongue on yours, slowly swirling around it as you gasped and moaned. His saliva dripped from your chin as you blushed red. “Well, I don’t want to be disrespectful and especially not my Boss…” You panted, looking into his eyes as he caressed your cheek before planting another kiss on your lips. “Mhm.” He smirked, giving a few rough thrusts as you moaned loudly.

“Let me hear you scream ‘Yuta’ that’s what I really want to hear tonight, Babydoll,” Yuta demanded as you looked into his eyes, you gripped onto the pillows when you received a few rough thrusts. Your juices were running down your thighs, “ah! Yuta! Aah! Yuta!” You screamed in pleasure as he smirked, “good girl, that’s what I like to hear,” he watched the way your breasts bounced up and down, each time he fucked you. “Y-Yuta, please!” You spread your legs widely as he dove deeper into you. “Mhm, you’re really vocal tonight, Princess,” he smirked at the way you constantly moaned and called his name. “Really love that, Doll~”

Yuta lifted you into his arms, fucking you while holding you. “Aah! Aah! Y-Yuta… Please!” You screamed, grasping onto his shoulders as you threw your head back. “Mhm, you’ve been so good, thought I’d give you a ‘special’ treatment tonight~” He whispered and smirked, rolling his hips as you could hear the constant sound of skin slapping. He was really pushing you beyond your limits tonight.

“Aah… Yuta, aah…” You moaned, arching your back as you maintained eye contact with him. “Mhm, keep moaning my name like that, Doll,” Yuta hummed, you wrapped your legs around him as his thrusts were fast and rough. He observed your lewd expressions as he felt himself get harder. You felt yourself getting overwhelmed and started to climax “Y-Yuta… Aah!” You screamed, squirting all over his size. “Goodness, what a sexy sight, Princess,” he chuckled, rubbing his hand on your inner thigh that was covered in your wetness.

You closed your eyes as Yuta made out with you, he held you close and continued fucking you. “A-Are you close…?” You panted and patted his ass, feeling so overstimulated as he scoffed, fondling your left breast. “Soon, just hold on, Doll.” He hissed through his teeth as his thrusts were starting to get sloppy. “For a man you really know how to last long…” You panted, rolling your eyes in slight fatigue. “Mhm, it’s because this sweet pussy really keeps me entertained for so long,” he cooed, seeing the mess run down your thighs as you blushed red.

A few seconds passed as he climaxed into the condom, and you were panting heavily “Fuck,” Yuta cussed as he placed you down on the bed again. He was above you, panting heavily. “Mmh, you’re so fucking incredible, Y-Yuta,” you breathed heavily and cupped his face before kissing him. “Mhm, likewise, Doll,” he smirked and lay next to you. “You’re so incredible in bed, my God,” you hummed, flipping onto your stomach.

“Such a beautiful woman,” Yuta cooed, placing kisses on your lower back’s ‘Daddy’ tattoo, “aah…” You whined, looking over your left shoulder as he groped your ass. “You have so many pretty tattoos,” he kissed your left shoulder, staring at the ‘69’ tattoo. He ran his hand on your stomach as it slowly reached your breast.

“Ahh… Y-Yuta…” You moaned, “wanna go for a second round?” He whispered into your ear as you nodded, standing on all fours, “you’re taking me from behind, right?” You looked back as he rubbed your ass, smearing his cum from earlier onto your buttlocks “mhm, gonna fuck your ass, Doll~” He smirked, disposing the used condom into the trash can. He sighed, grabbing a new condom and wearing it while getting into position.

Yuta placed his hands on top of yours before slipping his dick inside your pussy, “can you handle it, Princess?” He cooed, nibbling on your earlobe as you gasped, “aah, ahh…” You felt the few thrusts send chills down your spine, “this position is really amazing~ ahh…” You moaned, gripping onto the bedsheets as he kept fucking you, “good to hear you like this position,” he groaned and scoffed, “–your ass makes me so hard, Doll,” he held onto your waist. “I’m not really a fan of getting it from behind…” You whined, closing your eyes in slight frustration, “but you make it so enjoyable and pleasuring, Yuta… Ahh~” you moaned, feeling him roll his hips as you could feel him move deeply inside you.

“Mhm, Boss knows your body very well, Princess,” Yuta cooed, kissing the top of your ear as he moved up and down, the bed creaking a bit as you were both sweating and moaning. “Ooh Yuta…!” You screamed in pleasure, resting your head on the mattress, “you’re fucking incredible at taking this dick, Princess,” he praised you, squeezing your ass, you moaned and panted heavily.

“Yuta, please go rougher, I can take it…” You begged, “I want you to go harder,” he scoffed, “you like it when I’m rough?” He fucked you roughly as you screamed and nodded desperately. A few minutes had passed as you laid completely flat on your stomach, feeling him finally cum into the condom. “Ooh Yuta…” You panted, tears rolling down your eyes as he kissed your left cheek.

“Whew, that felt fucking amazing,” Yuta panted, slowly pulling out of your ass as he removed the condom to squirt on your ass and lower back. He watched his semen dripping on your ass. “My, I sure made a mess on you, Doll,” he cooed and licked his lips, discarding the condom into the trash can. He squeezed your ass as it was slightly covered in his ejaculation. You looked back and blushed, “you aimed to squirt on my ‘daddy’ tattoo, didn’t you?” You stared at him in disbelief and scoffed while still breathing heavily. He let out a soft chuckle and smiled at you blushing, “maybe~ that fine ass really needed my autograph,” you sat up as he kissed you deeply.

“Mmh, then why not just remove the condom altogether when you fuck me, Yuta…?~” You whispered, looking into his eyes while fluttering your eyes. “Mhm, I’m not getting a coworker of mine pregnant, Princess.” Yuta replied, pulling you by the chin as you pouted your lips receiving another kiss from him.

"You know birth control exists, right?” You added, rubbing the back of his neck as he smiled sweetly, “I know but let’s just enjoy safe sex, Doll,” he insisted as you rolled your eyes, “Nakamoto-nim so boring~” you teased as he laughed before standing up and lifting you over his left shoulder, “mhm, I’ll show you something that’s not so boring later,” he slapped your ass on the way to the bathroom.

You two finished washing off as you were ready for a third round of sex, this night felt incredible to the both of you, nonetheless.

Yuta was softly making out with you, a few giggles left your lips. “Mhm, Babydoll,” he cooed, admiring your simple yet complex beauty. He had a hard time believing you were a few years younger than him.

“I love spending time with you, Yuta.” You confessed and blushed red when Yuta smiled, picking the blonde highlights of your hair and stroking them, “so unbelievably charming,” he smirked as you flicked his forehead, “–too late for any compliments on my hair now, hmmph.” You scoffed sassily as he chuckled and looked at you with puppy eyes, “what? You didn’t compliment my hair at the office and you’re trying to make up for it now?” You whined, folding your arms as he pouted a bit.

“Mhm, you’re really one woman who needs constant attention and reassurance, huh?” Yuta cooed, patting your hair as you poked the inside of your cheek and remained silent. “Mhm, no words for your Boss?” He cupped your face, staring into your eyes as you looked down and blushed. He sat you on his lap and kissed you, “if you keep giving me the silent treatment, I’ll make you scream for me again, Princess,” you closed your eyes as he started to make out with you. His right hand dropped from the side of your jawline and slid down to your inner thigh, he started rubbing the area.

“Mmh… Mmh… Y-Yuta…” You whimpered, seeing him detach his tongue from yours. “Finally decided to speak up?” Yuta scoffed, pulling you by the chin with his left hand as you nodded. “Mmh. You’re such an asshole.” You crossed your arms as he chuckled, holding onto your ass. “You’re always playing so hard to get,” you pouted flusteredly, “why didn’t you compliment my hair at the office?” You huffed bratty as he chuckled.

“Because I can’t afford to be seen unprofessional and flirting with a colleague at work, Doll,” Yuta whispered as you licked your bottom lips. “Especially not when my high school friend is there, and you know that we can’t flirt in public or at the office, Princess.” He explained as you kissed his lips. “Do you like me?” You asked, holding onto his shoulders as he looked at you before dropping his gaze to your breasts.

“Don’t ask such silly questions,” Yuta huffed, gently rubbing his thumb over your areola, you whined, “of course I like you.” He continued, looking directly into your eyes before kissing you. “–But we can’t be a couple,” he added, looking at you deeply as you pouted at his response. “Is it because I’m not your type…?” You asked, fluttering your eyes as he held you close. “You’re too young for a man like me, Doll.” He replied honestly.

Hearing that sentence hurts your heart a little. You’ve always seen Nakamoto Yuta as the ideal man of your dreams, although he’s a bit older than you. You couldn’t help but hope he would one day fall for you, somehow.

“–Besides, you should find yourself a good-looking boyfriend, a kindhearted and responsible man.” Yuta pulled back before placing a soft kiss on your lips. “You’re so mean,” you huffed coldly, getting off his lap as you stood in between his legs. He poked the inside of his cheek, “mhm, your Boss being ‘mean’ is nothing new, Doll,” he cooed, groping your ass before stroking it. 

“I didn’t know you were the type to bring up the age-gap between us.” You scoffed, clenching your fist stubbornly. “ Yuta chuckled, spreading his legs widely as you were clearly distracted by his big hard dick. “Mhm, young women like you get so easily attached, hmm?” 

“I’m not that young, you make it sound like I’m an immature brat… I’m fucking 27 years old!” You huffed, crossing your arms as he chuckled, “mhm, my, my.~ You get so easily frustrated and agitated, huh?” He reached over to stroke your chin, you looked into his eyes innocently.

“You’re young and dumb that’s why you get easily attached to older men like me, Princess.” Yuta scoffed, looking at you with slight amusement as you pouted your lips. “You’re not that old…” You rubbed your arm, then blushed red as he moved his hips forward a little. “Mhm, 31 years, you don’t mind the four years gap between us?” He huffed cockily as you shook your head eagerly. He scoffed and he made you kneel in front of him.

"You need to learn some discipline,” he shoved his dick into your mouth as you started to suck him eagerly and obediently, “you look so pretty full of Boss’ dick,” he pulled your hair as tears formed in your eyes as he thrust a few times, causing you to gag as he sighed, slightly rolling his neck, “youngsters like you are stubborn, desperately falling in love with bad men like me,” he scoffed, watching you glare at him as he smiled.

“Mhm, what a sexy expression,” Yuta cooed as you started to deepthroat him. He rubbed the back of your neck and smiled, admiring how you were drooling all over his dick, “you really know how to make a man like me cum,” he scoffed, fucking your mouth a little as he started to cum down your throat. Your breasts were slightly covered in his semen as you giggled, licking your lips while tasting his load. “My, Boss is mean, I really left a mess on you,” he helped you stand up and placed you onto his lap.

You hugged him as Yuta leaned in for a few kisses, “mmh, I like it when you’re mean to me, Yuta…” You pouted, cuddling his chest as he patted your back. “–It makes me excited and super turned on~” you cooed and snickered, he looked into your eyes and chuckled, “what a naughty lady,” he stroked your chin before slowly making out with you. “Mmh, Yuta…” You lay on your back on the bed as he was next to you, cuddling your face, “mhm?” He hummed, embracing you close, “why can’t you be my boyfriend?” You hummed, resting your jaw in your palm as he chuckled.

“Y/N, don’t be foolish,” he scoffed, dismissing your sudden question as you fluttered your eyes and supported yourself with both hands on the mattress. “–But I’m not… I’m being serious, Yuta…” You admitted straightforwardly, deeply looking into his eyes. “You know…” Yuta whispered, stroking the blonde strands of your hair as he looked deeply at you. “You should find yourself a good boyfriend of appropriate age,” you pouted as he kissed your forehead. “But I want to date you…” You sulked as he chuckled, seeing you blush red as he gave you a short kiss on the lips.

“I’m a complicated and difficult man, Park Y/N, dating me isn’t easy.” Yuta confessed and cupped your cheek before continuing to speak, “I’m a single dad with a daughter from a previous marriage after all,” he sighed, pulling back whilst staring at the ceiling. “I don’t care if you’re a divorced man, I just want to be yours…” You insisted, placing your hands on his chest before kissing him softly. “You’re just confused, Y/N,” he told you, pressing his forehead against yours, “I’m not the right man for you,” he spoke when you looked into his eyes.

“–Yet, you find me attractive, don’t you?” You mumbled, placing his hand on your left breast as you fluttered your eyes, “of course I do, Princess,” Yuta scoffed, playing with your nipple as you gasped, “your fierce and passionate personality paired with that beautiful body of yours,” he leaned in, kissing your jawline before leaving a hickey on your collar bones, “–it’s hard for a man like me to not get attracted to you.” He admitted as you blushed red before making out with him.

The next morning...

“Gosh, aah!” You moaned, sitting on the counter as Yuta was roughly fucking you. “I know, Princess, it’s frustrating,” Yuta sighed, holding onto your knees as he kept going at a fast pace. “We’re going for only one round,” he placed a kiss on your lips as you closed your eyes, “–I have to drop the girls at school,” he threw his head back as you pulled him by the tie and made out with him. “I-It’s fine, as long as we get to bang before you go,” you wrapped your arms tightly around his shoulders. “–Then I’m more than happy,” you moaned, throwing your head as he hugged you close.

“My, didn’t know dicking you down could make a young lady this happy,” Yuta cooed and chuckled as you blushed red, closing your eyes flusteredly. “I can't help it… I’ve never been this turned on and so energetic before while having sex…” You whined, watching your breasts jiggle roughly as he held you closer, “mhm, you must really enjoy this, huh?” Your breasts were rubbing up and down against his chest as you whined and panted. “Are you dropping by the office later or is university holding you hostage?” He whispered, holding you in his arms as you rode him a little.

“I don’t know, I’m going to the office later that’s for sure…” You panted, watching the drops of yourself leak on the floor and down your ass. “Mhm, that’s my girl.” Yuta cooed and smirked before kissing you deeply. “Aah!” You screamed, climaxing when he groaned, cumming into his condom as you both panted heavily. “Y-You’re so incredible, Yuta,” you panted, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as he smiled in relief. “Mhm, Boss knows this pussy too well, Princess,” he pulled out and discarded the used condom into the trash can. “What do you want to eat for breakfast?” He offered you the menu cart and sat on the couch, ready to dial the room service.

You jumped down from the counter and went to the bathroom to pee. Then you washed your pussy with hot water, “mmh, dunno, do they have waffles or pancakes?” You dried yourself with some tissues before slipping on your panties. “They have Belgian waffles with fruits, dark chocolate sauce, and whipping cream on the top.” Yuta said, putting on his boxers, you wore your sports bra. “They also have American-style pancakes with butter and syrup,” he added as you lay on the couch. “Mhm, I’ll go with Belgian waffles then,” you flipped onto your stomach, “American pancakes are too sweet for my taste,” dangling your feet back and forth. He put on his white t-shirt and took a quick glance on your ass before chuckling.

“Mhm, nothing’s sweeter than your pussy, Princess,” Yuta smirked, squeezing your ass, you stared at him and giggled, “you sure we can’t go for another quick round?” He shook his head and dialed the number, ordering breakfast for you. “Mhm, don’t tempt Boss like that, Doll,” he warned you, watching your hand rub and stroke the outline of his boxers.

Later that day...

“Papa, I’ve found a new tutor, her name’s Ms. Park,” Yuka said while face timing Yuta on the laptop, “ah, good job, Yuka-chan. You know what to do, right?” He asked her, “I’ll text you the important questions, right away,” he informed her and used his phone, playing with a pen in between his fingers. “So you basically want me to interrogate her?” She mumbled, “–sheesh Papa you’re too much,” she whined, rolling her eyes and frowning.

“You’re just going to ask her some questions, if she gets suspicious of you just tell her that you’re curious about her, that’s all,” Yuta added, taking a sip of his water bottle, “yes, understood Papa.” Yuka nodded, “anyways, where do you want to eat dinner?” He said, writing in his notebook as he looked at her, “mmm, I dunno,” she pouted and tugged some hair behind her ear, she looked rather irritated by something.

“You seem so tense today, is something wrong?” He asked, looking at her deeply as she shook her head. “I’m just tired, sorry for worrying you, Papa,” she mumbled before looking up, “take care, call me if you need me to come and get you,” he reassured as she nodded slightly, “see you, Papa.” She waved before hanging up.

“–Yah, there’s that weirdo Akiyoshi!” A boy walked up to Yuka when she stared at him, “what do you want now, Richard?” She scoffed, putting on her headphones as she tried to ignore him. “Listen to me, when I’m talking to you, bitch!” He yelled, snatching her headphones as she sneered, “hey, give it back!” Yuka yelled, reaching for them as he laughed, “wow you Japanese people seriously have no manners,” he waved them back and forth as she sighed.

“Richard, please give my headphones back,” she said as he raised an eyebrow, “that’s better, well then - how about you beg for it?” He laughed as someone pulled him by the hair, “–what is it that you don’t understand?” A girl tightened her grip around Richard’s hair as he whimpered like a little baby, “o-oww, stop it!” He yelled loudly.

“Chisa-chan…” Yuka mumbled, looking at her friend standing up for her. “Give Yuka-chan her headphones back before I make you bald, Richard,” Chisa demanded, pulling his hair tighter as he screamed, “okay! Okay! Here…” Richard placed the headphones on the table as she let go of his hair, he ran away cowardly.

“Chisa-chan, you saved me!” Yuka said happily before hugging her, “thank you,” she added as Chisa smiled in relief, “no problem, that chaebol guy’s full of himself,” she scoffed and sat across the table. “He didn’t hurt you, did he?” She asked, looking at her as Yuka looked down.

“He just pulled me by the hair earlier during the break, but a teacher saw it…” She mumbled weakly, “I don’t feel the pain but I felt bad for lying to Papa about it…” Yuka confessed, reading her book. “You should tell him about that Richard, I’m sure your father could put him into place!” Chisa scoffed before opening a packet of strawberry Pocky, “you know that I don’t like being a burden to Papa…” She hummed before taking a piece of matcha Pocky, “I guess… then I’ll have to constantly watch you in case that chaebol brat shows up again.”

You wore a simple black floral crop top and a short skirt, along with a pair of sneakers as you grabbed your tote bag before heading out. These apartments were recently renovated, according to Yeonwoo. You followed the directions on Naver's map as you rang the doorbell. The door opened as you entered the building and headed up to the 9th floor.

You gently knocked on the door as it opened, “mmm, you’re quite early, Ms. Park,” the little girl hummed, scanning you up and down. “Annyeonghaseyo, I’m Ms. Park Y/N, it’s nice to meet you, Ms. Akiyoshi.” You bowed as she left the door open for you to enter, “hi, my name’s Akiyoshi N. Yuka, please place your shoes on the shoe rack,” she said before walking into the living room.

You were surprised by how huge the apartment was, “here, please wear these slippers when you’re inside,” she said, placing a pair of slippers as you wore them, “ah thank you,” you bowed as she walked, naturally you followed her.

“Wow, you have a very nice place, Ms. Akiyoshi,” you looked around as she giggled, “mmm, you think so?” You nodded, “anyways, should we get started on your English lesson, Ms. Akiyoshi?” You asked, taking books out of your tote bag as she hummed, “ah yes, let’s go to the kitchen,” you followed her down the hallway that led to a fancy modern kitchen, a stainless steel gas top, and top-quality brand appliances. You noticed a few Japanese cookbooks on the shelf as she offered you to sit on the round leather stool near the kitchen counter. You bowed and sat.

Holy shit this chaebol kiddo must be fucking rich because this kitchen looks so unreal it’s like the one kitchen you can only see and afford in your dreams… 

“So do you have experience in teaching English, Ms. Park?” She asked you, “uh, yes. During high school I was abroad in the USA for about 2 years for an English program,” you answered as she noted it. “Do you live with your parents or do you live in a dorm?” She looked at you, “I live by myself, in a small apartment.”

This shit almost feels like a job interview. What’s with this chaebol kiddo…? Is she going to do a background check on me too?

“Alright, so you mentioned that you're a university student and that you have a part-time job at an advertisement company,” Akiyoshi hummed, flipping through a stack of papers, “wait, hold on, what do these questions have to do with our tutoring classes?” You asked, looking at her in confusion.

“Mmm, sorry, my dad told me to ask you these questions,” Akiyoshi hummed, smacking her lips as she rested her head in her palm, “but why?” You asked, looking at her in concern, “mmm, dunno you can say that I’m super wealthy,” she rolled her eyes and had a sly smile before meeting your eyes, “–and so I don’t need peasants to spread rumors or malicious comments about me and my father.” She scoffed sassily, staring at you.

“Ah I see, that makes sense,” you nodded sarcastically, fucking chaebol kid… “–sorry if I doubted you.” You mumbled, opening your English dictionary, “anyways, let’s get started,” you smiled as she moved closer and showed her homework, “today I need help with learning irregular verbs,” she hummed, pointing at her paper as you nodded.

“There are so many irregular verbs, how could I possibly memorize them all?” Akiyoshi pouted, writing down the past particle of to be. “Mmh, you can start by using them daily in conversations,” you suggested, smiling as she scoffed, “easy for you to say Ms. Abroad,” she rolled her eyes sassily.

Damn… Yeonwoo wasn’t joking when she said chaebol brats would be a challenge. In fact, it’s one hell of a challenge.

You stood up to stretch your arms. “Anyways, what’s your favorite subject, Ms. Akiyoshi?” You looked at her as she hummed, glancing at the ‘Daddy’ tattoo on your lower back. “Korean and chemistry,” she replied, handing her paper to you, “is it correct?” You looked and nodded, “yes, well done, Ms. Akiyoshi,” you folded your arms and smiled.

She traced her fingertips on your shoulder’s ‘69’ tattoo. “–Did you get those tattoos done here or in the States?” You looked at her, surprised, “well, most of them were done here, I only had my piercings done in the States,” you replied, pointing at the piercings in your right ear. “I see, I don’t really see the appeal in getting something that stays permanently on the body,” she twirled her hair around her finger, “well, they’re sorta meaningful you know,” you stroked the cross on your right arm.

“Mmm, my Papa says the same, he also has tattoos,” she tapped her fingertips on the counter, “care to stay a little for some tea?” She looked at you, “oh I’d love that, Ms. Akiyoshi,” you nodded and smiled, “hope you like Matcha,” she hummed, boiling some water on the stove, “Matcha… isn’t that some kind of Japanese tea?” You asked as she nodded, “correct, well I’m Japanese after all. It looks like you’ve been paying attention while stalking my profile, huh,” she added sassily as you laughed awkwardly, “you can say that…”

Man, what’s with this brat’s attitude? She’s seriously testing my patience…!

“Just kidding, don’t take it too personally, almost everyone knows what Matcha is,” she giggled, pouring hot water into a cup and whisking it with the powdered Matcha for you, “I wasn’t taking it personal…” you mumbled flusteredly as she scoffed, “oh you so were!” She laughed, handing you a cup as you thanked her.

“By the way, just call me Yuka, you don’t have to address me by my last name,” Yuka scoffed, “it’s too formal for me and I dislike that,” you nodded, “alright, I understand, Miss Yuka,” you sipped your tea and smiled, “wah, it’s really good, you’re excellent at brewing tea, Miss Yuka!” You praised her as she scoffed, “I know~ you could say that I'm a tea connoisseur,” she smirked as you giggled, “you sure are, never tasted Matcha made so delicious and this tasty.” You complimented her when she was staring at you up and down.

“What is it?” You asked, looking back at her. “Oh, nothing. It’s just that…” She spoke and stopped her sentence midway. –“That what?”

“–I’m just surprised to have such a pretty and stunning tutor this time, that's all, Ms. Park,” she pursed her lips and scoffed, you were slightly taken back by her sudden compliments. “Thank you, Yuka��” You blushed and showed a small smile, rubbing your arm shyly. “–That probably explains the many hickies you failed to hide, heh,” she raised an eyebrow before scoffing sassily, tapping the back of her neck while smirking.

“H-Hey Yuka, that’s so rude!” You yelled flusteredly as Yuka giggled, finishing her tea.

This feeling… Why does her sense of humor and teasing remind me of a certain and special someone…

“Thank you for teaching me today, Ms. Park,” Yuka bowed and looked at you wearing your shoes, “thank you for having me over,” you bowed too as she showed a small smile. “You know… your tanned skin is very beautiful, it reminds me of pretty Hyorin from SISTAR,” she admitted, looking at you. “Wah… You think so…? That’s too sweet, I’m getting flustered!” You giggled and blushed slightly. “Well, I’ll see you next time, bye-bye.” You smiled and waved, leaving her apartment.

Yuka smiled before dialing Chisa’s number, “so how did it go?” Chisa asked in curiosity, “mmm, it went quite well. I think this tutor’s quite extroverted this time, I like that,” she hummed, “anyways, when are you coming over? We can go buy snacks and game together,” Yuka smiled.

“Yah, I think I did okay on the tutoring gig,” you said nonchalantly on the phone with Youngji, “mmm, Unnie, you think so?” She huffed, applying mascara on her eyelashes, “coming to the nightclub in Itaewon, later?” You shrugged your shoulders while holding onto your tote bag, “mmh, dunno, maybe?” You walked towards the bus and got in.

–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞

A/N: My apologies for making it so damn looong, oof–!🤷🏻‍♀️😾

I think I'll try and make the upcoming parts a bit shorter because reading this and correcting it was a HUGE PAIN IN THE ASS. As per usual, thank you a million times for reading and looking at my fanfic. And most of all, thank you for all your patience and support. 💗

–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞–💚–🔞

– Next part >

[modern-day-bard]

Worth The Feeling

Content Warning: 18+

This story includes explicit smut, intimidation, and an age gap relationship (MC is 26, Javi is in his 40s). Minors, do not interact.

Chapter 5:

"Anna, you should have seen the size of my cheeks!" Emma gushes, much to the makeup artist's dismay. "I mean seriously, I was so swollen and I couldn't even swallow. Who knew they put mustard in wasabi?" Sophie, the makeup artist, and I exchange a knowing look.

"Well I'm glad you're alright Emma. It's good to have you back. Now do you have any questions on the directions I got from Naomi? She should be on the set with you both today but Lloyd wants to roll directly into shooting."

"Oh I got it. Look for the tape on the floor, hands on chest, hit the desk, yada yada yada. This one is easy. Fade-to-blacks are way less intense," Emma waves her hand dismissively.

Yeah, way less intense. When Emma is all set in hair and makeup, I escort her to the soundstage before making myself as scarce as possible. I've been in the room during an intimate scene once before, and I don't remember most of it. I was too busy making a mental to-do list. But something about seeing Emma in the same position I had been in yesterday makes me feel uneasy. I radio Dwayne to see where else I can make myself useful.

"You're all good, Ava. They're going to break after for lunch so you may as well hang tight there so you can run errands for Lloyd if he needs anything." I clench my jaw hearing his response.

"Copy. Thanks, Dwayne." I try not to sound as irritated as I feel. I simply don't want to watch this.

"Hey babes," Lana appears next to me, giving my arm a gentle squeeze.

Obviously I called her last night to debrief. She was busy laying sound mats on the ground in another part of the studio during yesterday's escapades, otherwise I wouldn't have heard the end of it. As if my own thoughts last night weren't enough to keep me awake. I actually still hadn't Googled him, but I could tell he was older than me. Definitely more experienced than I was. And, I mean, he's a movie star. Granted I might not have recognized him, but still. I was starting to feel like I was back in school, crushing on the popular boy who didn't know I existed. I didn't like that feeling then, and I detested it now.

I told Lana all the details, knowing that she would have tortured them out of me one way or another. But as giddy as she had been last night hearing everything, I could tell she knew I didn't want to be here right now.

"Hey," I give her a small smile. "Everyone mic'd up and ready to go?" I feel like talking about work-related issues will make this weird feeling go away.

"They're ready," She leans in a little closer, "But are you?"

"I'm fine. These things are always awkward, you know?"

Lana gives me a look that lets me know she isn't buying my nonchalant act.

"Quiet on set!" Lloyd yells at the top of his lungs. Not exactly necessary, but definitely a very Lloyd thing to do. "Places!" Javi positions himself in the doorframe, just like yesterday. Only now his hands are on Emma's back. Her bare back, as I now realize just how short her backless dress is.

"Aaaand, roll camera. Action!"

I feel my body tense up. I think any sane person would look away, but this feels like a car wreck created purposefully to toy with my early on-set jealousy, and I can't look anywhere but that fake hotel room.

But then, my jealousy is put on the back-burner when I see Javi truly devour Emma. I'm shocked she can even stay standing. His hands are everywhere, not just on her back like they were with me yesterday. He's kissing her everywhere, too. Her neck, eyelids, forehead, and the way he attacks her lips... I feel as though I can't breathe. When he backs her up against the wall, Emma remembers to arch her back like I instructed, but now Javi slips his thigh in between her legs. Something he didn't do yesterday, I can feel a heat beginning to pool in my belly, trickling its way toward my–

"Hot damn, he's good." Lana whispers next to me. I blink rapidly, as if trying to wake up to the present moment. All I can do is nod.

"More noise, both of you!" Lloyd barks. As soon as he does, Javi lets out a groan that makes my knees weak.

The pair make their way to the desk, wreaking the same amount of havoc on my emotions and libido before moving their way to the bed.

"Tell me you missed me." Javi demands of Emma, beginning to crawl over her. His expression is just as serious as yesterday, and his vocal register is dangerously low.

Holy. God. I didn't read the pages for today's scene, and I'm not even sure if that was improv or not.

"I missed you," Emma whines as Javi hovers over her. He kisses her lips lightly before dragging one of his large hands down her torso.

"The problem, my darling, is I don't quite believe you," Javi kisses her neck before speaking directly in her ear, "You're going to have to tell me again. Louder this time."

Javi slips his hand in between her legs and Emma arches her back off the bed, sighing.

"Cut!" Lloyd yells, causing me to take several much-needed deep breaths.

"Good job you two. Reset, we're going to do another take. This time, more noise from the beginning."

I cannot watch that again. The mixture of jealousy and heat in my stomach is too much to bear.

"Lana, I need to go on a walk." I whisper.

"You can't. The red light is on, you're not supposed to–"

"I know," I say, already heading toward the door. I go out the side entrance, ignoring the dirty looks of at least five crew members. I know that it might be dramatic, but I hate how envious I am of Emma's position. It's ridiculous. How long have I known this man? A couple of weeks? We made a few jokes, stood close together for a few minutes and now I'm jealous of his co-star? I really do need to walk this off.

- - -

I'm on my fourth loop around the wardrobe trailer when Dwayne, the Key-PA, radios my walkie.

"Ava, we need you back to soundstage one."

"Copy. What for?" I really hope they are almost done by now.

"Gutierrez asked for an escort again. We're about to break for lunch."

Dammit. "Copy. On my way back."

I enter the building, and to my pleasant surprise, they're not in the middle of taping. Javi, Naomi, and Emma are chatting in the middle of the set.

"Alright folks, that's lunch." Lloyd announces.

I take that as my cue to jog up to the stage.

"Oh, Anna! Thanks for the tips. It made taping a breeze." Emma says, tossing her long blonde hair over her shoulder.

I smile at her. "I'm glad I could help Emm–"

"Her name is Ava. Not Anna." Javi said, glancing Emma's way.

"Oh," Emma looks surprised, "I didn't realize, sorry Anna. A-Ava."

"Ready for lunch?" Javi asks me, stepping away from Naomi and Emma. We're walking off the stage before I can reply.

"How are you?" Javi asks, holding the door for me to step out into the bright light. The mundane question catches me off guard.

"I'm alright, thanks. How are you?"

"I saw you disappear for a bit. I wasn't sure if you were feeling well. You looked sort of..." he trails off.

When did he even have a chance to see me leave?

"Oh, no I just had some other stuff to do around set. I can get a lot done when you all are taping."

"Ahh." Javi nods, but his expression doesn't seem fully convinced. "Didn't care to watch the end of the scene, huh?" He definitely wasn't convinced. I'm not the one with the acting chops.

"No, I just already know how it ends," I point out, "Though I didn't know the lines. That took me by surprise."

I probably shouldn't have said that. I'm not sure if it in any way implied how I had been feeling.

"What did you think?" We're almost at his trailer now, but his tone seemed genuinely interested in my feedback.

"It was...convincing." That seemed like the right choice of words. I think.

"Mmm." He muses. "It didn't feel as convincing as I wanted it to."

"How so?" I can't help but ask.

"It's difficult to explain. Sometimes it's simply the chemistry. It doesn't pan out the way you want it to."

"The chemistry seemed pretty palpable to me." Ouch, my tone was a lot harsher than I intended.

We've arrived at his trailer, and instead of walking up the steps, he just turns and looks at me for a long moment. I try not to fidget. He looks as though he's deliberating something.

"Sometimes the chemistry is stronger with someone else," he glances down at my lips, "it makes it difficult to feel successful during the takes with the new partner."

I gulp. Is he implying what I think he is implying? Or am I so warped from these newfound feelings that I'm orchestrating this in my head? Best to err on the side of caution.

"Can you let me know if your food has arrived? If not, I can grab something from crafty for you."

Javi takes a step back, looking at me with a new curiosity. He looks like he's going to say something, but he just walks up the steps to his trailer and peaks inside.

"Yes, it's here," he pauses before continuing, "I actually ordered two this time. I was hoping to keep my fries to myself." He smirks.

"Oh. You wanted me to eat with you again?"

He shrugs. "I told you. I like the company. If you have other things to do though, don't let me keep you."

We haven't eaten together since I escorted him back to his trailer almost two weeks ago. I haven't even been asked to escort him since then. I have too many thoughts running around in my head, and being in his presence is only complicating things.

"That's kind of you, but I do have work to do. I'm sorry." The fact that I did actually have work I could be doing made this lie a lot easier to sell.

His face falls, and I regret my decision immediately.

"Give us a call if you need an escort back to the soundstage, though. I'd be happy to walk you." I smile, hoping to soften the blow.

To my surprise, Javi takes the three steps back down from the trailer until he is standing in front of me again. Looming in front of me is more like it.

"Have dinner with me then," he says quietly, "Please."

"What?" My bewilderment must be as present on my face as it is in my words.

Javi smiles. "I don't mean to make you uncomfortable, Ava. If you say no, everything will continue as usual. But I would like to take you to dinner, if you're interested."

I blink a few times, trying to find my bearings. It becomes obvious, very quickly, that I do want to have dinner with him. At the same time, I don't actually know if that's something that would be frowned upon. But despite all of the thoughts circulating around my head, and despite the nervous knot in my stomach, I simply look up at him and say,

"Yes. I'm interested."

Next Chapter

Previous Chapter

Series Masterlist

[psychicreadsgirl]

SNSD/Girls' Generation Reading/Information

This is based on whatever I can pick up from SNSD. This is a psychic reading. There may be tea so I won't list names.

Some members are really close and are best friends, almost like family.

1 member is generally very disliked by the members and most of them think she is very dumb and ignorant.

Most of the members are dating at least someone. A couple of the members have no interest in marriage or having children. A few members are only into casual dating/flings. One member is particularly known to have many backups/options.

One member enjoys picking her nose and then flicking her boogers at others.

One member is very self-conscious of her looks, especially her hair. She is fearful of balding.

Some members are heavy partiers and also drink a lot. These members have also experimented with drugs and are recreational drug users. They like going to raves/clubs. A few members may be addicted to drugs/alcohol/smoking - I'm sensing pain killers in particular for one person.

A couple of members cannot sleep.

One member is very spoiled and thinks she is better than the rest of the members. She is quite arrogant and makes a lot of sharp comments that are quite condescending. Staff are scared of her passive aggressiveness/vengefulness.

One member likes to use her mental health as an excuse for things and as a way to market herself.

One member insists to have hot/pretty bodyguards around her.

One member hates showering/bathing esp washing her long hair so she can go on without showering for days.

One member has a shopping addiction and cannot stop buying luxury goods.

One member is in a long-term relationship. The love between the partners has died out but they are together for the sake of their career. She doesn't want to marry him.

Several members have cheated on their partners.

A couple of the members are particularly kinky.

One member likes to eat a lot of different food but will not finish any of them, so there's a lot of leftovers and she doesn't pack them up. Lots of food waste.

One member likes to sit in a way that's considered impolite/rude in public.

One member litters a lot and also doesn't pick up after her pet.

One member has a dog and uses the dog as an accessory. She actually doesn't care about the dog at all and the dog has starved on many occassions.

One member likes to post on forums/Naver etc and spread bad stuff about the other members or other idols.

One member really hates a lot of male idols and their groups, including BTS and EXO.

Several members actually do not get along with their parents or siblings and a few have some money issues with the family.

Two members want to leave SNSD.

Several members suffer from eating disorders or mental health illnesses. One has recovered from an eating disorder.

A couple of members have dated within the company, including staff/manager.

Several members have had to do some extra stuff to get their solos/acting gigs.

One member has gone on a date with several popular kpop male idols.

One member likes to date younger people like a huge age gap.

One member likes to make fun of people too much; it's usually seen as a "joke" but really she's laughing at others.

One member in particular is super heavily in debt and is always borrowing money/forgetting her wallet at outings. Some of the brands that she has endorsed are angry at her because she promised to make some posts/videos but they were of subpar quality or never happened.

[terraliensvent]

I’m not defending the anon you’re all dogpiling, but it is an extremely chronically online take to say that 19 and 16 is a “weird” age gap for serious conversations. The trauma dumping should not have happened, and it is the older person’s responsibility to cope with their issues themselves… But sometimes we blurt things out when we’re not in a healthy state of mind. I’m sure a lot of us can say that we’ve unintentionally trauma dumped on someone before when they come to us and ask “hey are you doing okay? do you wanna talk about it?” and we just let the floodgates open.

Maybe I’m just being too sympathetic as someone who’s been in a dark place and has spewed my trauma on friends who try to comfort me. But I guess the difference is that gin needs to acknowledge that they can’t just continuously vent their life issues on some stranger on the internet. Having a support group is good, but you never know when someone you think is your friend will screenshot all your DMs with them and then post them online, right? lol

In all seriousness, I genuinely hope that gin wakes up one day and realizes that they NEED to just take a step back from social media and work out their problems offline. This is not healthy and they seem to just be prone to drama. I think both sides of this argument have their good and bad takes. The 16 y.o probably shouldn’t have publicized this in a whole document, and gin obviously should not have dumped their life problems onto them.

post related

thats why i said IN MY OPINION, it is weird. it is their responsibility to check who theyre talking to, and if it were hypothetically a more egregious gap, like for example 23 and 16, it would still be weird to me for them to use the younger person as a crutch. im not even saying you cant do small vents to your minor friends, this post put it pretty well and its one thing to say "yeah im just having a tough time right now," vs "hey are you ok?" "yeah i just stopped taking my meds and im coping with alcoholism," its also an issue to me that veal seemingly had to manage civ to the point of making sure they go to class and do their morning routine, and when veal was offline for an hour civ spammed them.

having a bad mental state can be an explanation for clouded judgement, but i think its still the responsibility of the older person to make sure theyre staying in line (and if they dont, to properly acknowledge the behavior was wrong, NOT defend it and act like it wasnt a big deal)

theres also the discrepancy that, to my knowledge, civ and veal barely knew each other. the doc says they only met around the terra revolution in April, which means they'd only have been online friends for around 5 months at that point. being online friends with someone is a LOT different than being irls, and it is a lot to dump on someone out of the blue, especially someone who's only in high school.

i do agree though, civ severely needs to get offline, seek professional help, and build a support system irl. the way these issues just pop up continually shows a trend that maybe being so online isnt good for them

[66sharkteeth]

So I read a translated webtoon today and it appears to be 13+, and in the newest episode there was swearing. I don't mind swearing mind you, but with what you had to do and the translators can do it without a single care in the world feels unfair.

What's with Google's "Swearing bad" once a year anyway? They act like children take damage from it or something. There was a lot of swearing around me as a kid. It never traumatized me, and as my mother was honest about what the words meant I never swear much but do not mind it either (once on a train, some teens younger than me put swear words in every other sentence, but they used them grammatically wrong, that annoyed me more 🤣). Something that did traumatize me was the fetish fuel in Totally Spies honestly..! And huge age gaps, like romance books in the 90s where a girl was 10-16 and dating a guy 20-30 like it was the most natural thing in the world, wtf.

So yeah... Keep the swearing panels around so you can swap back if they change their minds again..! But I've noticed that the translations are slightly different based on where I am. So in Scandinavia the first racism arc in Lookism is gone and Vasco's mental health issues isn't gone into in much detail, but when on vacation in Spain, both are there..! 😕

So to be clear, I'm allowed to swear lol. CoB is now currently fully censored and approved for the young adult rating. There's still plenty of swearing in the comic. I can say pretty much everything but fuck. Bitch, ass, shit, damn, etc are all allowed, just not in excess.

People seem to be under the impression that CoB is gonna be a Weenie Hut Jr version of the comic now and I assure you, it's vastly the same minus a couple of panels that I think were way more impactful w/ the inclusion of "fuck" and a couple of panels where it just looks like I forgot to draw blood (+2 very blatantly censored panels. Can you find them?)

I'm chewing my arm off a little here trying to get it across to everyone that CoB is still gonna have blood and swearing in it. It's not going to be a 4Kids version of the comic. The edits to the violence were also very minor and only like 5 panels out of 150 episodes, none of which were actually impactful moments like Rex losing his arm or Stella being skewered. I just can't say fuck or have bitch and shit 50 times in one episode anymore, that's pretty much it.