#but..... humanity never lives up to the ideals the scouts had again

[rivangel]

their uniform is ugly their insignia is ugly and the way they spit on the meaning of the wings of freedom is perverted

[umichenginabroad]

Madrid Week 11: Basque-ing in Nature

Hola a todxs! Niko here, back again with week 11 (writing this during week 12 oops [I had a huge databases project that I grinded on all of last week, expect a double blog week soon]) of studying abroad in Madrid!! I’ve got a little over a month and a half left in Madrid. Near the beginning of the semester, I mentioned a VSauce video about time that I enjoyed a lot. Recently in my culture class, we discussed the same concepts. Upon reflection, I think that I’m experiencing time in an incredibly ideal way.

What do I mean? Time flies by fast. It feels like weeks go by in the blink of an eye. Last week, what seems like yesterday, it was March, and now we’re already halfway through April. Time flies when you’re having fun, and I think that much is true. I’m having a blast, experiencing a new world every week, and as a consequence, I’m not thinking about time as it passes. It doesn’t drag; It goes by quickly. 

But I’m still in lecture every week. And two of my classes (the engineering ones) are oftentimes unbearably boring. I feel time pass when I’m sitting in those chairs waiting for the time to go home. My life during the week is simple: go to class, cook meals, go to cafes to study. But on the weekends, I’m traveling across Spain and Europe, meeting new people, partying, the list goes on. So it’s kind of like a long-short time sandwich. I get to experience time dragging on in the moment, and I also get to experience it flying by. And, because the exciting experiences happen regularly and frequently, weekends fill up huge blocks in my memories that make it feel like I’ve been here for years. I would say that “it feels like just yesterday that I stepped foot off the plane” but no, it really doesn’t. It feels like an eternity ago, truly. 

So, I’m kind of milking time for nearly all that it’s worth, which I think is a W. We’ve only got so much of it in this life. Anyways, there goes my bi-monthly rant on time. Hopefully it didn’t drag on too much. Or hopefully it did. Or both. 🙂

Anyways, last weekend, I learned a very important lesson. Two of my roommates (Eli, Max) and a close friend (Jack) rented a car (#JeepTrailhawk) and took a trip up to Northern Spain (Please don't mind the terribly cheesy title), splitting our time between Basque cities and Spain’s best national park. The lesson? As much as I love cities — incredible amalgamations of culture, humanity and energy — I’ll never experience the same type of awe and amazement looking out over a skyline as I do gazing upon a range of staggeringly huge snow capped mountains. Let’s talk about the trip:

Gatzetelugatxwho?

We set out from Madrid late Thursday evening. After a short-lived yet intense fiasco with google maps sending us in a couple of loops around Madrid after someone (the driver) (Max) missed a couple of turns, we were on the highway headed North. We had about 4 hours of driving until we reached Bilbao, where we had rented an Airbnb for the night. It was a pretty drive — Madrid is surrounded by a beautiful Sierra not even 30 minutes outside of the center. We arrived at our Airbnb (which was situated in a weird liminal space-ish neighborhood) and crashed, ready to tackle the morning task: Gatztelugatxe.

Huh? Yes, I was as confused as you probably are the first time I read that word. Especially the tx, which is pronounced as ch in Euskera, the mysterious language of the Basque people that has no known origin or connection to any modern tongue. It looks and sounds weird, and in the Basque country you’ll see it everywhere. It almost feels like it could have been spoken in some far off kingdom in Game of Thrones. 

Speaking of, we went to Dragonstone, AKA Gatztelugatxe. Shout out whoever the location scout was for those scenes, because they absolutely killed it. The site was beautiful, and I think the pictures will speak for themselves.

After that, we drove a few more hours to San Sebastian and explored. The energy was incredible. Sunny weather, beautiful city side beach, Burnt Basque cheesecake, calming sunset and delicious food (pintxos = tapas in Euskera!). There’s not much more that I can say other than the fact that simply walking around and taking it all in was an absolute joy. 

We proceeded to drive 4 hours west that evening to our second stop of the weekend: Picos de Europa national park (driving quickly through Bilbao, which has a really cool modern architectural style). We arrived at our Airbnb in the pitch black around 12 am, stumbled our way inside, cooked a comically oversized dinner (1.5 kg of pasta is too much for 4 people btw) and prepared for our big hike the next day.

The Hike

We woke up bright and early (it was like 10am) Saturday morning, ready for the 7.5 mile, 3000 foot climb ahead of us. I’d done a 13 miler with a similar increase in elevation once before in the Texan desert (Marufo Vega trail in Big Bend, highly recommend), so I wasn’t too concerned with the difficulty — only with whether we picked a worthwhile trail. I was silly for underestimating “Lon - Río Burón - Peña de Mañimoco”.

We started by driving into a tiny town in the national park, parking on the side of the road and setting off into a dirt trail that winded shallowly up the mountain. At this point, I was unimpressed. Most of our view of the mountain ahead of us was blocked by trees, and the path felt too well kept to be the basis of the true rugged backcountry experience I desired. Jokingly, we pointed to the top of the mountain we were hiking towards when we got to a clearing, asking damn, wouldn’t it be crazy if we went up there.

Yeah, it would have been crazy, but I guess 3000 feet is not to be underestimated, especially if you start at 1000. The paved trail split off into a smaller one once we broke through the treeline, which split off into a gravel shoot winding up the ridge of the mountain we had joked about a mile or two earlier. The wind started picking up, threatening to throw us off the mountain at any second as we climbed higher and higher (it was seriously intense wind. Jumping up, we actually caught a little extra airtime).

Each switchback revealed a view of the mountain and the valley below that was more stunning than the last. We passed through a huge diversity of different terrains, each so distinct they felt like Minecraft biomes stitched together. We even happened upon a herd of domesticated cows (which we were terrified of passing out of fear that they would attempt to butt us off the face of the mountain... we thought they were wild at first). At one point, we came across a meadow that looked like it came straight out of a studio Ghibli movie. We quite literally frolicked in the grass as another hiker (the only other person we saw on the trail) watched us from behind a tree, hiding from the wind. We talked to that guy later, we called him the Wind Wizard.

On this hike, I felt something reminiscent of the feeling I got as a 6 year old playing imagination games in the basement of my childhood home — unashamedly wide-eyed excitement. Looking out over the Picos de Europa (literally, the peaks of Europe) I couldn’t help but smile. This is the feeling I mentioned at the beginning of this blog that I think I can only experience whilst totally immersed in nature. At its core, it’s rooted in mindfulness and gratitude for the present moment -- something that I try to practice as much as possible in my everyday life. 

However, the reason this trip ended up being one of my favorites I’ve taken so far wasn’t just for the things that I saw — it was for the people that I spent it with. As much as I enjoy the independence and exploration of solo-traveling, I think that experiencing new things with trusted friends will almost always be more enjoyable. Being rooted in that feeling of wonder with others makes it feel more exciting, more significant, more real — both while it’s happening, and in the memories that stay with us forever. 

We finished the hike with a steep decline down the mountain and ended up back at the car, where we drove into the larger town and got some drinks at a local cafe (where they had original craft beers on tap, and where I tasted the best Vermouth I've ever had). We left our airbnb early the next morning, but not before buying a block of cheese from the local Queseria (which was also absolutely fire). En fin, this was one of the most beautiful and rewarding hikes I've ever done, rivaled only by the aforementioned Marufo Vega. I think we chose well!

So, my key takeaways from this trip? Nature is awesome, and so is experiencing it (and life in general) with other people. At the end of the day, we’re just really smart animals who evolved (in nature) to be biased towards social behavior, so I guess that makes sense (#evolutionarypsychology?). I’ll be in the Bay Area this summer for an internship, and I’m really excited to go backpacking over the weekends in all of the epic nature that surrounds the area, meeting new people along the way.

Here's the itinerary list for this week's trip:

Basque Country Google Maps List

That’s all for this week’s blog! As always, check out the picture descriptions for a little more info. Thank you all very much for reading, and I’ll see y’all next week 🙂

Adios,

Niko Economos

Aerospace Engineering

Universidad Carlos III de Madrid

Madrid, Spain

economos@umich.edu 

[ohmypawsandwhiskers]

Chapter 5 of Of Devils and Monsters is live on Ao3

Of Devils and Monsters Summary:

Fate brings two old friends together again and sets them on the path to truth. In a last ditch effort to save her own skin, Lozen Daniella Pierce reaches out to an old friend in hopes of gaining her freedom. In doing so, she and Erwin Smith find themselves thrust on a path to truth- the truth behind the walls, behind secret organizations, and the truth of who they turned into. Rating will go up, but I am setting it at M for now. Eventual Levi x OC in later chapters.

Chapter Snippet:

“That spot over there is ideal for reading around mid-day,” he said, pointing towards a bench bathed in sunlight situated beneath a willow. “Most of the Scouts eat in the mess hall, so there’s little distraction.” Maybe it was formality to fill up the uncomfortable silence that threatened to settle, but that wasn’t like Erwin. He was never one to fill the air with meaningless conversation- not like what she experienced amongst her peers in Stohess. Fools who thought eloquence and intelligence could merely be achieved by being the most verbose, opting for antiquated words that were seldom found outside of the older novels society considered to be the classics. Other books were lost to time, scrapped to allow for the publication of newer materials, but the classics were safe.  “If you want, you can often find Miche over there at the stables after training…” Erwin was continuing with his tour while she was lost in thought, the noises of the horses white noise to grumpy musings. Those dinner guests never considered what secured those books on their seemingly immortal pedestal. Yes, it obviously involved word choice, but not in the way they thought- big obscure words equating intellectualism. They never considered the ever evolving nature of language as words went out of vogue, not because of the intelligence to wield them properly, but because of the nature of everything in this word. Changing, adapting, evolving. The amount of times she tried not to roll her eyes. Tried to refrain from beating it into their thick skulls with those beloved books that classics retained their status by the craft of the story- words coming together to paint a narrative with themes that transcend human differences, each word carefully placed to draw out emotion, to hold a mirror to the reader that created space for introspection. Overarching themes that allowed each reader their in instrument in the orchestra of human experience- some wood winds, others string, timpani, or brass- all with a unique sound that would clash if played simultaneously were it not for the theme. Introduced, echoed, modified, inverted, yes, but all making it into a complex and beautiful piece, unified in commonality and diverse in the sound produced by each section.  Erwin understood that about language- gleaned its power at a very young age and applied it to everything he did. Words weren’t to be insulted or watered down by careless wielding. And at that thought, Lozen scowled inwardly at herself for getting lost in past grievances rather than pay attention to his words. Those points of interest had history for him- one he was trying to share with her. 

Read the whole chapter here (x)

[caelumangeli]

Forgotten Realms/BG3

Accumulation of quick and easy reference sheet for muses in different settings Check out my Carrd for more in depth character detail!

Name: Jesse

Age: 27 Gender: Male Race:Half-Elf Sexuality:Bisexual Height: 5'7" Class:Rogue/Warlock Subclass: Thief/--- Occupation: Guild thief/lackey in The Black Watch Guild History: Jesse grew up in the lower city of Baldur's Gate, his mother human while his father was an elf. His father had gotten himself associated with a rather questionable guild, which in the end caused his early death, and forced Jesse to step up in his place. He was around 13 when he lost his father, and was forced by said guild to step up and take his place, learning to and getting in the habit of picking locks, thievery, and occasional arson(though that one's for himself).

Now he is still working for said guild, despite his less than ideal treatment and pay for his doings. Mostly in fear for his mother as she's all he has left, and loves her dearly. Her safety, and security for the two of them was a big reason why he didn't fight against them, despite his mothers pleas. Oftentimes this can include a variety of acts, such as stealing.. anything really, breaking/sneaking in, planting evidence, occasionally it can often involve traveling . Less frequently does it include poisoning or assassinating someone. While he has been part of a group on a mission to do such, he scouted and broke-in, but he had a harder time trying to bring himself to kill someone who wasn't attacking him/putting him in a life or death situation.

______________________________________________

Name: Zelene Strongmoon

Age: 37 Gender: Female Race:Leonin/Human Sexuality:Bisexual Height: 6'7" Class:Barbarian Subclass: Path of Beast Occupation: Pirate Captain. Admiral of The Moonraiders (pirate fleet):3 Self proclaimed Admiral Queen. History: Zelene was exiled from her homeland at the age of 17 after being pinned for the assassination of the tribe's leader, and the attempted assassination of the leader's daughter. After being wrongly exiled, she began traveling on the sea's, soon taking on the life of a pirate.

After 20 years sailing the sea's, she's become a rather well known and feared Pirate, Captain of the Crimson Star, Admiral of the Moonraiders, and 'Queen' of the Trackless Sea. Since being exiled, and knowing she was innocent, without being given proper trial, proper justice, she has been building her strength, her crew, her allies, her artifacts, so that she may return back to her tribe. Back to the island she was exiled from, banished never to step foot or see again. Return, and burn it all to the ground.

______________________________________________

Name: Nita

Age: 267 Gender: Female Race: Fairy Height: 2' Class: Druid Subclass: Spore Druid

History: While not originating in it, Nita spent majority of her life in the Underdark, having befriended Myconids and lived amongst them for generations. She had one myconid sprout who grew fond of her, and once they grew large enough joined her in her journeys and adventures in the underdark, often influencing her to leave a good, positive mark, even if she would care not to. This Myconid spent their entire life with Nita, becoming one of her closest companions, even amongst the Myconids. When it was time for them to pass on, and spread their spores, instead of spreading and creating a new bundle of life, they went to Nita, and while she isn't sure how or what happened to cause it, they had fused with her. They are what made her a Spore druid. Now, she is enver really alone, as she has not her old friend anymore.. but a variety of new ones, which feel warm and familiar to her. Comforting. They whisper and tell her the secrets of the spores. They sing her their song so that she may call upon them for assistance and power. They protect her, influence her, care for her. They are seperate. They are their own beings, yet they are also part of her, they are her.

[ly0nstea]

Bringing this back and I want to add to it seen as the anime ended:

Floch regretted what he said to Armin, but he never found the time or nerve to say that to Armin's face, it was a mix of pride and social isolation.

He grew up in the capital but he always wanted to live in a village like Dauper

Floch is thought of VERY highly by Eldian society, not even because of his leadership role and sacrifice, but because he was a very down to earth leader. He spoke to his soldiers and drank with them, unlike Shadis, Erwin, or Hange. He wasn't charismatic but he was genuine.

Floch is really good with kids.

He would personally break the news to every family of the soldiers who died under him, he felt a responsibilty to all of the Eldians that he got killed, even if it was necessary, he was fighting for their freedom and safety as well as civilians, Floch's ideal world sees a useless military like Hannes.

Despite growing up in a city, Floch was very isolated, he wasn't good at making friends which is why he put everything into the Jaegerists. He figured if he couldn't get people to like him, he could get them to respect him, and that formal social interaction made it easier for him to talk to people, which is how he made friends eventually.

Vim was his best friend and his second-in-command, he took over after Floch died. Vim is the one who told Floch's family, and he told them personally, not in a formal military setting.

Ever since Shiganshina Floch wanted to be in Squad Levi but he fucked up his first impression so bad he never tried again.

After he died, Floch joined the Scouts in the Afterlife.

Eren had a conversation with floch that he remembered right before his death. Eren told him is family was safe, but he also told him that he never intended to wipe out all of humanity and that paradis would eventually fall. Floch died heartbroken, but with no regrets, he only mourned the Eldians he wasn't able to give safe and peaceful lives.

My headcanons about Floch's family because the anime never gives us anything:

Flochs dad died in the military when he was very young, he wasn't in the servey corps so it was a very shocking thing

Floch has an older brother and a younger sister, and when he pictures Eldia and Eldian's it's their faces he thinks of. His brother is Eldia's strength and it's pride, and his sister are the innocent Eldians that he wants to protect, when he died it was them he was thinking of, not Eren.

Floch's brother is in the Garrison and his sister is a medic for the military, they both survived the rumbling

Floch really looks up to his brother

Floch's family were told by the government that he died fighting valiantly, and he was given a very large and mournful funeral considering his role in establishing the Jaegerist Regime, he has an empty grave next to Eren's, with a very large headstone with engravings on it

Floch's sister named her first son after him.

Floch planned to settle down and have a family after the rumbling, he was going to name his first son Eren Erwin Forster

Floch didn't have any romantic partners at the time of his death because he wanted to give all his energy to Eldia until it was secure, leading to him being very lonely in the last months before the Rumbling

[niccymo]

The ‘Spice of Life’✨ Legacy Challenge

Sometimes playing the sims can get a little stale, and somewhat repetitive, especially The Sims 4. I know I can get stuck playing the same stories over and over again, so I decided to create this challenge to add a little excitement and variety to my, and hopefully your, game-play!

After all, variety is the spice of life!

Gen 1: The Wild Child

You’re a sim who loves to get down, go on adventures and spend time with other sims! You can be a bit of a handful for some sims, but that’s okay! You’ve been wild since the day you were born and you wouldn’t want to be any other way. You have about a million things you want to do in your life time and you’re gonna do them all!

Aspiration: Friend of the Animals

Traits: Dance Machine, Adventurous, Outgoing

Generation rules / goals:

Join the secret agent career and get to the top of it before your sim becomes an elder

Once your sim is an elder have them start a new job, keep them on their toes!

Complete the Friend of the Animals aspiration

Master the Dance & Pet training skills throughout your sims lifetime

Have five animals in your sims house-hold at one time (these should be cats, dogs, raccoon, foxes, etc.) - you don’t always have to have five but you should at some point

Have you sim have at least 10 friends and having a falling out with one of them and become enemies

Have a best-friend that is NOT your partner / spouse

Have your sim go out at least once every weekend to either the club, the bar or somewhere else they can dance! They’re a dance machine remember!

Your sim can have as many children as you like, but keep in mind that they have a lot of animals in the house

You must have at least one child in order for them to become heir, they can be adopted or biological, it doesn’t matter!

Go on at least two family vacations, one of these must be to Mt. Komorebi

Have your sim be a very relaxed parent, no rules, no pressure to get good grades, etc. (Parenthood is needed for this but if you don’t have it that’s okay just do your best without it!) 

Gen 2: The Money Maker

Your parent was the coolest! but you always wished there was more structure in your life. You’re a perfectionist, and truth be told a little materialistic, but that doesn’t make you a bad person! You love to hangout with friends, playing video games and chatting about the latest Sci-Fi movies. From the time you were a child you knew you wanted the best things in life and were determined to work your butt off to get them! 

Aspiration: Mansion Baron

Traits: Perfectionist, Geek, Materialistic

Generation rules / goals:

Have your sim start working as a teenager to save up for their future house

Complete the Mansion Baron inspiration

Reach the max level of the Business Career in either the Investor or Management branch (although the Investor branch makes a bit more money!)

Master the video gaming skill throughout your sims lifetime

Have your sim start their own club once in their teens with ‘Play video games’ as the main activity. Keep this club going throughout your sims life and try to have a club meeting once a week 

Make your sim go to GeekCon whenever they can, once they have kids bring them along as well!

Have a hobby that can make you money - kind of like a side job. Whatever skill you choose (painting, flower arranging, etc.) master it

Once your sim completes their Mansion Baron aspiration have dinner parties once a week - Your sim is materialistic and they want to show off the nice house they’ve worked so hard for!

Once your sim becomes an elder have them retire and focus only on hobbies and relaxation (only once they’re reached the max level in their career though)

Gen 3: The Tree Hugger

You grew up in a wealthy household with pretty much everything you could have wanted. You had a great childhood and your admired your parents work ethic, although you knew that when you grew up you wanted to do something more meaningful for the world than investing. So you packed up your bags as soon as you hit young adulthood and moved to Evergreen Harbour

Aspiration: Eco Innovator

Traits: Green Fiend, Vegetarian, Good

Generation rules / goals:

Your sim should be a vegetarian as soon as they hit their teenage years

As a teen your sims should also start their own garden and begin working on their gardening skill

Your sim should complete the Eco Innovator aspiration within their lifetime

Master the Gardening skill throughout your sims lifetime

Master the Juice Fizzing skill throughout your sims lifetime

Join and reach the max level of the Civil Designer career

Your sim should live as sustainably as possible for this generation, this includes owning a bee box, having a dew collector and recycling with the home recycling machine

Have your sim marry someone as Eco-friendly as you bonus points if it’s Knox lol

Have an at home, eco friendly wedding in your sims backyard / yard. Having the wedding cake be a honey cake, get creative with it!

Adopt an animal that’s not a typical pet (raccoon, fox, etc.) your sim found this little buddy while dumpster diving and bonded instantly

Gen 4: The Undecided

You grew up with a parent and grandparent who accomplished great things; they were sims who worked hard and stuck to their guns. You have always been..well a bit different. You can’t even decide what you want for breakfast, let alone pick a career or spouse. This makes you jealous of others like your parent and grandparent who you believe have their life together.

Aspiration: You must change your sims aspiration 3 times during their life but never complete one, not even their childhood one.

Traits: Non-committal, Jealous, Erratic

Generation rules / goals: 

Join and quit scouts as a kid; get about halfway through before you quit

Have your sim join at least two jobs as a teenager. They can join and quit more if you like

Get your sim to level 5 of at least three skill during their lifetime before they quit those as well

Change your sims career multiple times, making sure they never reach the top of any career

Get your sim married, and divorced...twice. It’s up to you whether you sim ends up finding someone to stay with. However, your sim must have only have one child from all of their relationships.

Have your sim have an affair during one of their relationships. It’s up to you whether the partner finds out about this or not

Your sim must lose their relationship with the Gen 3 sim (their parent) after a big fight over Gen 4′s jealousy issue. Your sim should never speak to that parent again

Your sim must never be best friends or true lovers with anyone; they are non-committal and that means no matter how much they care for another sim they feel somewhat unsure about every relationship

Gen 5: The Vampire Groupie

Your childhood was less than ideal, although your parent loved you they had a lot of their own problems and that left you pretty lonely at times. Your solace was a particular vampire movie about a sim who falls in love with a vampire. “That could be me,” you though, “That WILL be me.” So when you become a young adult you take everything you have and leave in search of your dream life in Forgotten Hollow, the only problem with your plan is that you’re just a bit squeamish... okay a lot

Aspiration: Master Vampire

Traits: Romantic, Family Oriented, Squeamish 

Generation rules / goals: 

Your sim should watch a lot of movies as a child and teen. Of course your sim loves that particular vampire movie that definitely doesn’t rhyme with Highlight, but really they love all movies

As soon as your sim becomes a young adult move them into Forgotten Hollow

Meet and start a relationship with a vampire of your choice; you can put a sim from the gallery in your game or date Caleb Vatore, Lilith Vatore, or even Vlad Straud if you want!

I think this goes without saying but your sim should be turned into a vampire for this generation lol

Complete the Master Vampire Aspiration

You can have any career for this generation, it doesn’t matter!

Master the Vampire Lore skill throughout your sims lifetime

Master the Pipe Organ skill throughout your sims lifetime

Start a ‘Vampire Club’ with only other vampires present, you can use this club to do any kind of vampire activity - however, since you left your old life behind, these sims are your only friends

Your sim is squeamish so they personally choose not to drink other sims blood unless absolutely necessary, this means your sim must grow and sustain a garden full of plasma plants

Once your sim obtains a plasma fruit (and two garlic) they can prepare a Sunlight Reversal Cocktail if they like, that way they can go into the sun during the day; this isn’t required though

Your sim must have at least three kids. One of these children should NOT be a vampire. This will be the heir. If all of your children are born vampires you can use a mods to make them human. I recommend MC Command Center, which you can find here: https://deaderpool-mccc.com/#/releases

I also recommend this mod: https://modthesims.info/d/589300/child-vampire-manifestation-v1-9.html which basically makes it so that child vampires can perform any vampire actions, just like teens, young adults, etc.

Gen 6: The Beach Bum

Your parents are absolutely wonderful, but are weird. In fact, you’re convinced that you’re the only sane one out of your whole family. You love them but who in the right mind would want to live the life of a vampire? You knew early on that the vampire life was not for you, and thank goodness you just so happened to be the only sibling born human! I guess you can thank those recessive genes. You want to live the Beach Life, spending your days out in the sun and working to conserve the beautiful island of Sulani!

Aspiration: Beach Life

Traits: Child of the Ocean, Loves the Outdoors, Free Trait / You can pick your sims third trait!

Generation rules / goals:

Your sim must move to Sulani as a young adult and spend their whole life there

Reach the max level of the Conservationist Career

Complete the Beach Life aspiration

Befriend as least one mermaid - your sim can become a mermaid to if they want but it’s not necessary

Marry someone who already lives on Sulani as well

Have your sim live in a house on the beach at least once during your their life

Complete the sea shell collection

Spend ALOT of time outside; fish, ski-do, tan on the beach - your sim loves the outdoors and the Sulani sun, anything they can do outside they will

Keep a close relationship between your sim and their parents & siblings - even though they don’t love the vampire life they love their family

Gen 7: The Tinkerer

You’ve always been a homebody, hanging out in your house on the computer and tinkering with things in the home. Your parent was always nagging you to go outside and play as a kid. As soon as you were old enough to hold a wrench you were fixing things. You knew when you became a young adult you wanted to go to Foxbury Institute and learn to program and create robots!

Aspiration: Computer Whiz

Traits: Genius, The other two traits can be anything you choose!

Generation rules / goals:

* For this generation I ABSOLUTELY recommend this mod which shortens university. It just makes it sooo much easier to complete a degree: https://modthesims.info/d/646803/shorter-university-degrees.html *

Your sim should spend a lot of time inside as a kid, using the computer, reading books, playing video games

Have your sim complete the Whiz Kid aspiration as a child

Master the Logic skill throughout your sims lifetime

Master the Robotics skill throughout your sims lifetime

Master the Handiness skill throughout your sims lifetime

Once your sim becomes a teenager they should be the one who fixes ANYTHING broken within the household

In order for your sim to attend Foxbury Institute for a Computer Science degree your sim must have certain skills (such as computer programming, robotics, etc.) since it is a distinguished degree. You’ll need to work on these skills as a teen to have a chance to be excepted there. If you don’t feel like having your sim work on those skills as a teen your sim can attend Britechester University but they should still work on the robotics skill!

Complete the Computer Whiz aspiration

Graduate university with a degree in Computer Science

Live in a modern style house in any world

Gen 8: The Believer

Your parent has always been a technological genius, creating artificial intelligence. But you’ve always known that science wasn’t needed for there to be fantastical things in this world. No one else in your family believes your crazy ideas about alien but hey, you once heard that your great grandparents were vampires, so it could be possible! Sure you’re a little erratic but you’re determined to prove the existence of aliens, and befriend them. How will you do this? Well by becoming an iron pumping, rocket building astronaut of course!

Aspiration: Bodybuilder

Traits: Athletic, Self-Assured, You can pick your sims third trait!

Generation rules / goals:

You sim must join and reach the top of the Astronaut career

Your sim must live in Oasis Springs

Have your sim complete the Body Builder aspiration - astronauts have to be strong after all!

Master the Rocket Science skill

Your sim will unlock a rocket when they reach level 10 of their career (the rocket can either be the Apollo Rocket - unlocked though the Space Ranger branch of the astronaut career, or the Retro Rocket - unlocked through the Interstellar Smuggler branch. You can choose which rocket you want)  but honestly who wants to wait for that, so as soon as your sim gets to level 5 of their career use cheats to unlock the rocket and start building!

Once your sim has completed their rocket you must level up their Rocket Science skill to level 10 and then install the Wormhole Generator upgrade. This will allow you to travel to Sixam and meet aliens!

Your sim must befriend and marry an alien they meet on Sixam. If you don’t like that particular alien you can either come back to Sixam or open CAS and edit them, either is fine.

Have your sim have a baby with their new alien spouse. Only have ONE baby.

If your sims baby is born NOT an alien you can use cheats to make them one. MC Command Center can be used for this and is linked above for Generation 5

Gen 9: The Star of Sixam

You’re an alien and you’ve proud of it! You loved listening to your alien parent tell stories of your home world and knew that when you grew up you wanted to make your relatives on Sixam proud. The best way to do this is of course to become the most famous alien musician the Sim world has ever seen!

Aspiration: Musical Genius

Traits: Self-Assured, Perfectionist, Music Lover

Generation rules / goals: 

Your sim must NEVER wear their disguise unless absolutely necessary - they are very proud to be an alien and they don’t see any reason to hide that

As a child your sim should complete the Artistic Prodigy aspiration

Master the Violin skill throughout your sims lifetime

Master the Piano skill throughout your sims lifetime

Your can have your sim master the Singing skill throughout their lifetime if you want, but it isn’t necessary

When your sim becomes a young adult move them to San Myshuno, where their musical dreams can really take off!

Have your sim busk for money in San Myshuno at least 5 times

Have your sim reach the max level in the Musician branch of the Entertainer career

Your sim should marry or be with someone who is also musically interested - you can enter CAS and cheat this or create your sims partner

It doesn't matter how many children your sim has for this generation, but the heir should NOT be an alien - you can use MC Command Center to make them human if you need to

Gen 10: The Apprehensive Actress / Actor  AKA the Final Generation!

You grew up in a VERY artistic household, with parents who were both interested in music and one parent who made a huge career of it. You love acting and knew your parent was ecstatic when you started showing interest in acting as a teen. Unfortunately you don’t really like the idea of being famous...

Aspiration: Master Actress / Actor

Traits: Loner, Good, Creative

Generation rules / goals:

Your sim is an artistic child, however we aren’t gonna worry about completing the Artistic Prodigy aspiration as a child because we did that last generation - you can do it if you want though!

When your sim becomes a teen they should begin working on their acting skills

Your sim should reach the max level of the Acting career

Have your sim master the Acting skill

Your sim should marry someone non-famous in a private ceremony with only those sims (or family and close friends if you like) present

Your sim should maintain as good a reputation as possible - they are still a good sim, they are just a bit anti-social

Once your sim finished the acting career and has achieved the Global Superstar rank they should retire

Your sim, now retired from acting moves to one of two lots in Brindleton Bay that have NO neighbours

They should spend the rest of their life making money off of artistic projects such as knitting, painting, etc.

Have your sim leave the house only when necessary to avoid the paparazzi, and if they do go out they must wear a disguise

Your sims spouse can have any career, but they should NOT be famous in anyway

It is up to you whether you decide to have your sim have children and continue the family :)

Well we’ve come to the end of the challenge!! I just wanted to say if you decide to play this challenge or even have taken the time to read it, THANK YOU SO MUCH! It means the world to me to be apart of this sims community ❤️

If you decide to play this challenge on your tumblr pleaseee use the tags #spicechallenge or #spice of life challenge. That way I can see what you do with this challenge, that would be amazing 😊❤️

[safertokiss]

Lost in Translation

A/N: Heyyyyy guys...remember when I used to post like every two weeks? Yeesh that’s awkward...but I’m backkkkk woooooooo party time! I was so excited that my discord buddies organized another fic swap because it was so much fun the first time. This time around I was chosen to write a doozy for the wonderful @writing-in-april and I have decided to bless you all with a beautiful subby boy. Sub Spencer lives in my head rent free, no cap. So sit back, relax and pretend it's you getting fricken railed. Peace out girl scouts;)

Pairing: SPENCER x READER

Category: SMUT hehe oh yeah and fluff

Word Count: 4.8k

ENJOY:)

~~~

MASTERLIST

~~~

For as long as she could remember, Y/n had always wanted to learn Russian.

So, naturally, when she found out that their newest case involved two lovers who also happened to be Russian criminals trying to escape the United States government, she simply couldn’t help but jump at the opportunity to become more involved in the investigation. 

It’s not that she’d never been on a stakeout for the Bureau before, in fact she’d probably been on so many at this point that she’d lost count. The only difference that this specific stakeout brought to her life was the fact that it was her first one to have ever been shared with Spencer Reid.

Her and the young doctor had lived in the same apartment building since her first day at the BAU, but their relationship pretty much began and ended at that. Of course they greeted each other whenever they passed in the halls of their building and ricocheted off of each other’s theories whenever necessary during their meetings in the round table room, but it would be a lie to label their relationship as anything other than casual acquaintances as well as amicable coworkers. 

She had never been able to fully get a grasp on the elusive Dr. Reid. The fact that he was already such an integral member of the F.B.I. at the ripe age of 25 astounded and, well to be honest, perplexed her. Not that she doubted his abilities or intelligence in any way, quite the opposite really. She admired how utterly brilliant he proved to be day in and day out, even with the shy exterior he presented himself with to the world. Well, shy was definitely more of an understatement. 

She had never met someone more socially awkward in her entire life, but with that being said, she couldn’t help but find it endearing and pretty dang adorable. Y/n constantly found herself enjoying his pathetic attempts at human interaction on a daily basis. From the nervous stutters to the out of this world hand gestures, there was much for her to dissect about the young doctor. And while she could openly admit that he was quite easy on the eyes, in a boyish-innocent kind of way, she had never really been able to see him in that sort of light.

If she thought his normal social interaction skills were entertaining to witness, his reactions to any of the conversations that took a more raunchy turn were to die for. The speed at which his features would ripen red like a tomato whenever anything of a sexual nature was brought up during cases was truly amazing, impressive even. However, unlike the rest of their team, she knew he wasn’t completely innocent. The walls in their apartment were as good as paper when it came to thickness, so it wasn’t that big surprise that the sounds created within them carried fairly well. 

Or at least that was what she had discovered after the first night she heard him touching himself just through her bedroom wall. 

Yes, it was less than ideal that their bedroom walls just happened to be adjacent to each other, but what could she do about it? It wasn’t as though she never sought out her own pleasure while alone in her apartment...although she would bet money that she was much better at withholding her noises. Instead, she learned to adapt to the sounds from next door and continue on with her life, having accepted that guys will in fact be dudes, no matter how innocent and meek they may appear.

When her boss had explained the nature of the assignment to them, there wasn’t anything of significance that had jumped out at her. It was all pretty standard instruction. They would wait, parked, in a government issued SUV overnight at a location close to the whereabouts of the criminals and simply translate their conversations using the mics that were planted prior. While Hotch knew that Y/n herself couldn’t understand Russian, it was common knowledge that the resident genius easily could transcribe the language.

And that was how she found herself cramped next to Spencer Reid in the stagnant vehicle, pen and paper in hand, patiently waiting for the translations to begin. 

It was almost completely silent inside the car, apart from the quiet whirring of the heat coming through the vents, and she could basically feel the nerves coming off of the man next to her in waves. That’s why she was completely thrown off her game when his timid voice was the first to break through the silence that had encompassed the space they inhabited together.

“So um Y/n..h-how have you been recently?”

She did her best to hide the small smirk that started to form on her face from the stuttering mess that spilled out of his mouth. She definitely didn’t want to make him feel even worse about himself so she decided to humour his adorable attempt at conversation with her...well...sort of.

“Oh ya know Reid, just counting the days until I get some action. How about you?” If she  thought he was sputtering nervously before, that was nothing compared to this treasure.

“Oh um well uh I-I mean...I don-I don’t...uh...w-what was the question a-again?”

This time she couldn’t stop the airy chuckle that escaped her lips as she leaned over and patted him gently on his thigh.

“Relax Reid, I’m just fucking around with you. Well for the most part...I certainly wouldn’t be opposed to some action, but that’s a whole can of worms I am not about to open during a stakeout”, Y/n laughed, not at all missing the steadily spreading blush that coated his sharp features.

“Yeah...no..yeah right of course...I t-totally knew you were just um fu-messing with me! Uh we should probably um r-review our assignment...you know just so we’re all s-set before we start.” How adorable.

“Aye-aye captain Reid. Ok so..”, she muttered while fiddling with the listening device to secure the right frequency. “...we just have to wait until they get back so we’re in range of their conversations. That’s when you’ll have your time to shine and prove yourself as the resident genius once again. And I’m sure that you’re aware that I don’t know a lick of the Russian language so I will be the best damn transcriber for you that the world has ever seen”, she finished with a smirk. 

Even Reid chuckled a bit at her words, the ever-present blush slowly creeping back upon his face and neck. 

“I’ll uh-I’ll hold you to that then.” Y/n had to admit she particularly liked to see the boy smiling, especially when it was the result of her own words. His innocence seemed to call out to her like a siren and she didn’t know how to feel about it.

“Oh-oh there they are! Ok get the pen and paper ready because as soon as they’re in range I’ll start translating.”

Getting themselves situated, they waited the few seconds it took for the couple to get close enough to the vicinity of the SUV for their conversations to begin to be broadcasted through their system.

“Как вы думаете, они идут по нашему следу?”

“Do you think they’re on our trail?”, Spencer easily understands, leaning slightly closer to her so his words were clearly heard.

“Ни за что. У этих глупых американцев нет шансов поймать нас.”

“No way. Those stupid Americans don’t stand a chance at catching us.”

At this point, the couple had already disappeared behind the door at the entrance of their current base, leaving only their words to give the closely listening agents much needed context clues.

“Я когда-нибудь говорил тебе, как сильно мне нравится твоя уверенность?”

“Have I ever told you how much I love your confidence?” 

Even Spencer let himself smile at the chuckle that left Y/n’s lips. “Awww how cute...they’re flirting with each other over mass murder. I strive for that kind of intimacy.”

“Да у тебя есть. Но почему бы тебе не показать мне, насколько тебе это нравится.”

“Yes, you have. But why don’t you show me just how much you love it.”

Uh oh, Y/n thought to herself. Not a second after the untimely thought permeated her brain, the sounds of wet lips sloppily colliding against each other filled the otherwise silent vehicle. After the few seconds of shock wore off, their heads whipped to face each other, eyes wide and mouths wide open. “Huh...well this was certainly an unexpected turn.”

“I uh um-uh well w-what do we do now?”, Tomato Boy nervously sputtered out over the chorus of moans and groans that were currently bouncing off the SUV’s walls. As unexpected as the present situation was, she was absolutely eating up his reaction to the crude sounds.

“Well, Hotch did say he wanted us to take down every single word that was shared between them so...I guess we’re just gonna have to keep moving forward with the translations. You can do that, can’t you Reid?”, she explained, not even attempting to hide the growing smirk on her face.

“Yeah! Yes! Mhmm I can do that, I c-can definitely do t-that.”, he gushed, trying to subtly clear his throat to clear the steadily growing tension in his body.

“Good to hear, Doc.”, she cheekily replied just as the raunchy sounds echoing through the system transitioned to different methods of communication, more legible ones.

“Ты была для меня такой хорошей девочкой. Я думаю, ты заслуживаешь награды.”

Quickly clearing his throat once more, he jumped back into action, with what Y/n noticed was considerably less confidence than before. “You’ve b-been such a good g-girl for me. I think you deserve a r-reward.” Spencer’s voice had noticeably dropped to a whisper by the end of the sentence, forcing Y/n to lean closer to be able to hear his translations, only magnifying the already present tension in the air. 

“Пожалуйста, папа, я сделаю что угодно.”

“P-please daddy.” His voice broke at the end igniting something deep inside Y/n’s being. “I’ll do anything.” In that moment she truly believed he would do anything, his own words or not, based on the obvious strain in his pants that her eyes glanced over, and also by the way his skin completely succumbed to goosebumps as her warm breath caressed the shell of his ear. She didn’t really know what the hell was happening, why her body was absolutely loving the way he gradually leaned into her’s, submitting all of his vulnerabilities into her hands. 

“Тебе это нравится, не так ли, маленькая шлюшка. Как член папы глубоко внутри тебя?”

She watched the way he inhaled a deep breath and released a high-pitched sigh before continuing on, subtly pressing her legs together to control the excitement thrumming through her body at his pathetic tone and mannerisms. 

“You like t-that don’t you, you little-uh-you little s-slut?” From their close proximity, she could clearly make out the speedy heartbeat clambering against his chest as he spoke. And if that was the case, he must’ve been able to feel hers as well. “Like daddy’s c-cock deep inside of y-you?” She could’ve sworn she saw his dick twitch slightly in his pants.

“Маленькая шлюшка уже придет за мной? Тогда умоляйте об этом. Бля, умоляю позволить тебе кончить.”

Y/n certainly did not miss the airy sigh that escaped his lips, watching as a bead of sweat dripped down his temple, confidently guessing it was not from the heat that had been coming through the vents.

“Is the little-little s-slut gonna come for me already? B-beg for it then. Fucking beg f-for me to let you c-come.” Spencer was speedily falling apart at the seams and she was loving it. More than loving it. She was craving it. Craving the little noises that he was trying to stop from escaping his lips. Craving the way he slightly bounced his leg in an attempt to control his arousal, which was futile because it had obviously already reached its full potential in the confines of his khaki slacks. 

“Пожалуйста, папа. Пожалуйста, позволь мне прийти. Мне это надо. Пожалуйста.”

Without even hearing the words translated back to her, she could hear the utter desperation in the girl’s voice. She no longer needed to understand the Russian language to be able to finish the translation, and as she sat there with her thighs tightly pressed together, she knew exactly what it meant.

“Please!” The utter need that was present in the original audio was somehow mirrored perfectly by the young doctor’s breathy voice, his eyes squeezed tightly shut, a prominent vein popping through the skin of his smooth forehead. “Please, p-please, please let me come. I n-need it. Please!”

“Приди за мной, детка.”

Deciding that she could regret her actions in the morning, Y/n quickly grabbed his face before he could translate, angling his head so she could whisper directly into his ear at the same time he spoke the last line of the night.

“Come for me baby.”, they both spoke at the exact same time.

Pulling away as fast as possible, she watched his clamped eyes shoot open as the most obnoxiously loud moan she had ever heard escaped the poor kid, his whole body spasming as a result. And using the large stain on the crotch of his pants as a guide, she was pretty certain she knew what had happened.

For the next few minutes there was silence in the SUV, apart from Spencer’s heavy breathing as he came down of course, leading them to believe the couple had fallen asleep after their...activities. Of course she wanted nothing more than to tease the trembling mess next to her, but she could already tell he was mortified beyond belief because of what happened so she didn’t want to make it any worse for him than it already was. 

After waiting a few extra minutes just to make sure that they had actually gone to sleep, the pair drove away from the stakeout location, Spencer not having said a word since his...big finish. As much as she loved watching him fall apart in front of her, she really didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable around her. 

“Well that was certainly an unexpected turn of events for the night, huh?”, she said, lightly chuckling with the intent of lightening his mood. She was very glad to see it had the intended effect.

“Uh y-yeah...you could definitely say that again.”, he mumbled with the ghost of a smile on his plump lips, though she could still clearly make out the blush coating his features.

“So hey, I know that you usually take the metro, but I’d be more than happy to give you a ride home after we drop the SUV off at the office if you want.”, she warmly smiled in his direction without taking her eyes completely off the road.

“Oh um..yeah that would be perfect. Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it Reid.”

~~~

The rest of the ride back to the office was pretty much spent in silence, but it was much more comfortable than it had been before, which was a huge relief. After dropping the keys to the SUV in the lock box inside, the two agents piled into Y/n’s car to go back home to their shared building. On their way back she considered just asking him if he wanted to ride with her everyday just to make his life a little easier in the long run.

Once they got to the parking lot and exited the vehicle, they began walking towards the entrance together, the awkward tension from before creeping back into the air around them. Soon enough, they found themselves standing in front of their respective doors, both unsure of how they were supposed to end the night’s interactions. After a few moments of painful silence and eye contact, Y/n was the first one to rip off the band-aid.

“So...I guess I’ll see you tomorrow Reid?” He seemed to be broken out of his trance by the sound of her voice, snapping back to attention.

“Huh? Oh yeah uh yes of course. S-see you tomorrow Y/n. Goodnight.” He scampered into his apartment before she could even get a chance to respond to his bidding.

“Goodnight.”, she whispered to no one other than herself as she unlocked her door and headed inside to shower quickly before diving into her soft sheets.

She was sitting up in her bed, book in hand, with only the small glow of her reading lamp illuminating her room when she heard it. Of course she knew immediately what they were, a talent that had developed and strengthened from living adjacent to a pretty much pubescent boy.

The tell-tale sound of moans and groans vibrating right through her wall.

She knew she probably shouldn’t be listening, something about a violation of privacy or whatever, but she just couldn’t help it. He sounded so desperate it was driving her insane. So much in fact that she was in the process of skimming her own hand downwards when she was interrupted by a certain something from the Doc’s room.

“Y/n! Oh god, please. Please.”

Oh. Oh.

Not even giving herself a second to consider her actions, she was up on her feet basically sprinting to his door, pajamas and all. Not even bothering with knocking, she noticed it was unlocked and let herself in, beelining for what she assumed was his bedroom by the increasing volume as she approached it. Standing in his doorframe, she was utterly mesmerized. There he was, sprawled across his sheets, completely bare with sweat coating his hair as he rapidly pumped his angry, red cock, her name tumbling from his lips like a chant.

“You’re so beautiful like this.” She smirked as she watched his head shoot up to where she was standing, his hand immediately stilling it’s rapid movements. Watching the panic spread on his face was intoxicating to her as she slowly approached his bed.

“Y/n! Oh my god, I’m so sorry! I uh-I didn’t um...” His words trailed off and his eyes widened as he watched her slowly begin removing her clothes as she moved closer to him. 

“Shhhhhh.” She managed to remove both her shirt and pajama pants in the short trip over to his bed and she had no intention of stopping there. Now standing directly in front of him, she let her eyes wander over his still frame completely, soaking in the amazement in his dark eyes and the slight tremble that was periodically rippling through his body. Maintaining eye contact with him the whole time, she reached behind her back and unclasped her bra, letting it pool on the floor next to her.

It was honestly shocking his eyes didn’t actually fall onto the floor with how far they bulged out of their sockets, a small moan leaving his mouth. 

She giggled at his enthusiasm before bringing her soft hands up to caress his face gently, his body shuddering at the contact. “Do you want me to keep going baby boy?” Taking a second to process the question that had left her lips, he slowly nodded while looking her in the eyes, his own full of awe. 

Happy with his answer, she reached for the edge of her panties before pushing them down to join the other pieces of clothing already inhabiting his floor. Spencer couldn’t speak. He could barely even breathe. Five minutes ago he had been jerking off to his neighbor, who also happened to be his coworker, and now said neighbor was crawling onto his bed, completely naked, with a wicked smirk on her face.

Straddling his lap, but making sure that there was no actual contact, she reached up to cup his face again, slowly rubbing circles into his defined cheekbone. “Is this ok baby boy? Is this what you want?”, she cooed. 

Spencer looked like he honestly might cry from the pure compassion laced within her words, but still found a way to nervously nod his head in affirmation of her questions. With a warm smile on her face, she leaned forward and placed a feather-light kiss on his lower jaw before continuing up the side of his face, basking in the small whimpers that fell from his pretty lips. Finally reaching his ear, she let her warm breath tease him before proceeding. 

“Do you want me to take control of you? Is that what you want sweet boy?” While the whine that immediately escaped him was answer enough, she pulled back searching for a more concrete answer to her question. “Hmmmm, you’d like that?” 

“Yes.”, he whispered, nodding his head anxiously. 

While he was answering she had leaned back towards his face, placing soft kisses all over. “As you wish baby boy.”, she whispered, changing course to attack his neck with her eager lips as soon the words left her mouth. Spencer gasped instantly and she couldn’t help but smirk against his pale flesh, increasing the pressure in which she was assaulting his neck.

Through the groans that spilled past his lips, she was able to make out his pathetic attempt at words, not slowing down her lips at all. “J-just make sure not to leave any m-marks. We’ll g-get in trouble at w-work.” Of course Spencer would be the only person on the planet to remember their office guidelines while getting his neck sucked like a vampire.

“No marks...that’ll be difficult. I want everyone to know just how thoroughly I fucked you.”

Feeling extremely satisfied by his enthusiastic response to her vulgar words, she slowly lowered herself down his body, pausing with her mouth right above his groin. Somehow the poor kid already looked completely fucked out and she hadn’t even done anything yet. Hearing him wince as she gently grasped and started stroking his cock, she knew this was gonna be fun.

Staring directly into her eyes, he watched the string of spit leave her mouth and drip directly onto his dick, eyes bulging at her bold actions, still in shock that any of this was actually happening. 

Entranced by the way his chest expanded rapidly as he watched her curiously, she leaned forward and licked the tip, his head falling back onto the pillow behind him. “I’m gonna suck your cock...but only because I want to see if you can not be a spaz about getting head from me.” Her words made Spencer whimper and she smirked as she took him fully into her mouth, soaking in his pretty noises. 

Y/n had only been going for a minute or two when she heard his groans get louder and felt him twitch in her mouth. Pulling off of him with a pop, she hummed at the sight of the completely wrecked boy in front of her, panting and shaking adorably. It wasn’t long before the perfect idea infiltrated her head, her body thrumming with anticipation and excitement.

“You’ve been such a good boy for me. I think you deserve a reward.”, she smirked, reciting the words that they had heard verbatim. Seemingly catching on to what she was pushing for, he responded accordingly.

“Please Y/n. I’ll do anything.”

She quirked her eyebrow in his direction questioningly, slowly grinding her dripping core against his achingly hard cock. “Anything, baby boy?”

Snapping his heated stare directly to her eyes, he cracked a beautiful smile. “Anything.”

She couldn’t control the grin that overtook her lips as she lowered herself down onto his erection, writhing in pleasure at the feel of him inside of her and the sound of his wanton moans. “Good boy.” 

Wanting to give Spencer time to fully adjust and control himself, she started her movements out slow, lifting herself up until only his tip remained inside before dropping down completely into his lap repeatedly. He was a moaning mess on the sheets below her, sweat coating his body along with goosebumps covering every visible expanse of his skin as he panted like a dog. He was so fucking pretty like this. 

Deciding enough was enough, she picked up the pace considerably, bouncing like a mad woman on his dick, while her sharp nails scratched down his creamy, pale chest in front of her, leaving angry, red streaks in their wake. Spencer had devolved into a blubbering mess underneath her and that lit her soul on fire.

“You like that don’t you, you little slut? Like your cock deep inside of me? Huh?” 

Y/n was pretty sure that he was short circuiting below her, his brain cutting off all control over his body as he spasmed uncontrollably and moaned for the entire fucking building to hear. Good, she thought. Let them hear how whipped he was for her. Even though it had only been a few minutes since she increased her speed, she could feel his cock starting to twitch violently inside of her and she knew he was close, really close.

“Is the little slut gonna come for me already?” All he could do was whimper in response, having to nod his head emphatically due to his loss of speech.

“Beg for it then. Fucking beg for me to let you come!” She was on fucking cloud nine right now, floating through the motions, as his whimpers increased in volume and speed. Mustering up all the strength he could, he spit out as many audible words as possible.

“Please! Please, please, please let me come! I need it! Please!” He was crying now, tears rapidly pouring from his eyes and spilling down his cheeks out of sheer desperation and need to release the tension built up within his body.

She was in awe of him. As she watched the tears pour down his face, she couldn’t help but whimper too. Desperately needing to finish, herself, she brought one hand down to make circles around her clit, while the other she brought up to wrap gently around his flushed throat, leaning over to whisper in his ear like she had earlier that night.

“Come for me, baby.”

She once again pulled back to witness his reactions to her hushed words, the outcome only more amazing than before. She watched as his eyes rolled back as far they could possibly go into his head as his mouth dropped open in pure ecstasy, high-pitched whines escaping his lips, his release shooting up into her like it had always belonged there. Maybe it had.

Watching him come undone below her, combined with her hand speedily rubbing circles on her clit, she was catapulted into the most amazing climax of her entire life, her body buzzing with excitement as she tightened around him and collapsed on his chest, weak as could be after that activity.

The pair laid silently, apart from the heaving breaths whirring through the room, still in shock over what had just transpired minutes before. Slowly shifting her eyes to the shivering boy below her, she saw he was caught in a trance, his eyes dazed, a soft grin on his lips. 

Breaking him from his stupor, she gently cupped his cheek with one hand as the other drew lazy circles on his blotchy chest. Rubbing the skin on his face lightly, she leaned forward and kissed his nose, making him scrunch it up and giggle as a result. “Such a sweet boy for me. Such a sweet, sweet boy.” Her words made him melt inside and words tumbled out of his own mouth before he could even think about stopping them.

“Вы красивы внутри и снаружи.”

She looked up at him in shock, before breaking out in giggles. “Did you just serenade me in Russian? How romantic.”, she giggled, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

He couldn’t seem to control his giggles either, a fact that warmed her heart. “Yes, I suppose I did.”

Smiling up at the adorable boy she just had to ask. “What does it mean?”

Y/n watched as his signature blush quickly coated his features once again as he looked down at her with a shy smile. “You are beautiful, inside and out.”

With the warmest grin she could muster, she leaned up and kissed his jaw once more before snuggling up against the young doctor who had melted her heart.

Tag List: @hopebaker @pastathighs @psychedellic-phase @gloryekaterina @sleepysnapesnake @racharr @etherealgubler @furiouspartyrebelhoagie @andiebeaword @liaabsurd @cielo1984 @starkeybaby @victomizedbyreginageorge @rainsong01 @moonlight-jukebox @gretaamyk @httpnxtt @rachelxwayne @goldnratio @cheyxminds @kricketc29 @cupcake525 @pinkdiamond1016 @slutforthegubes @shadyladyperfection @emilysallysmith @babblingbrookex @legendaryanimeaestheticclou @sunstspidey @ashwarren32 @pixels-impulse @eviewildflower @spencerreider @awkwardsadaa @dirty-pan-goblin @spencerspecifics

[findopulencerp]

                                             𝖌𝖗𝖊𝖞 𝖑𝖆𝖕𝖎𝖓𝖘𝖐𝖎

he was born 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲-𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞 years ago, he is a 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐰𝐨𝐥𝐟 who lives in 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐥 as a 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫, and is in 𝐧𝐨 𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐤. he looks an awful lot like 𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐧.

“All too often someone spoils my enjoyment of their company by talking to me.”

Grey grew up on a run down farm in a rural township in New Jersey. He spent most of his time by himself, collecting sticks and rocks, and fishing anything he found interesting out of a nearby creek. He was a selfish child with a low tolerance for others, even going as far as to be removed from Scouts for biting other children that got in his way. As he got older, he remained similarly self-centred, enjoying his own company and merely tolerating those around him if it benefitted him in some way to do so. That was, until he met Bea.

Bea was a young lady from a rich family. They docked their boat in his town to avoid fees. They would only meet briefly, speaking mere sentences to each other. But, it was enough for him to know there was nobody else like her. Every Summer, he would walk past the docks on his way home, waiting for her arrival. The last day he saw her there, the two agreed the town had no future for either of them and made arrangements to run away together. They would meet under the biggest tree on his parent’s farm, at midnight.

It was a trap. 

As he waited for her in the moonlight, he was suddenly surrounded by large, shadowy figures. Inhuman beasts he’d never seen the likes of before. They beat him savagely, one piercing his skin with its fangs. They withdrew sharply and he felt himself beginning to change, his own body becoming a stranger to him. The beasts fled, their plan having gone awry. Grey passed out from his injuries shortly thereafter. 

When he came too, he was human again. Too sorely beaten to pick apart his memories of the attack to decipher what exactly happened. He tried to move on, but found himself unable to. Every night he lay awake, anticipating another beating. Every sound, no matter how minute, was a sign of immediate danger. As the next full moon graced the town, he learnt the gravity of what had occurred that night. Still unsure of his newfound lycanthropy, he went outside to give himself space to adjust. It was then that he smelt the others. Signs of their presence were all over his home. He knew he had to run. 

He fled the moment the sun rose, hopping buses until he ran out of cash. His new home was closer to the big city, ideal for remaining unknown as most people were simply passing through on their way to New York. He used his credit card to stay at a run down hotel, passing his time by watching TV or sitting at the bar. As not many visitors stayed for very long, the family that owned the hotel were quick to take note of him and over time befriended him slowly, offering extra food at breakfast, or a spare blanket in the Winter. As his card declined one month, the head of the family made a deal with him. Grey could stay there for free, on the condition that he befriended the owner’s son who was in the throes of grief and needed someone other than his parents for support. Seeing it as a fair deal, and not really having another option, he agreed. The son was quiet and overly submissive to anything Grey suggested. This meant Grey spent a lot of time watching TV or renting video games. On a good day, they would talk while Grey played. They had very little in common, but all they had was each other.

This arrangement lasted for a couple of years. They were the first time in a long time that Grey had felt any peace. However, they weren’t to last. With little warning, the hotel closed down and the family moved away. They left some money for Grey, slipping it under his door in an envelope, along with a note apologising for how things had to be. Despite the hotel now sitting abandoned, slowly decaying, Grey remained, even as the power failed and the cold and damp crept in. One night, Grey was awoken to the sound of the hotel door being broken in and the building quickly filling with the sounds of everything being ransacked. Assuming it was rowdy teenagers, Grey went out to scare them off. But, he was met with the same shadowed beasts he’d come to meet before. They attacked him again, and were only fought off by his own lycanthropy offering him the agility to run. He knew the building better than almost anybody and escaped down a cordoned off maintenance corridor which had concrete steps down to a fire exit. He fled into the night, eventually collapsing in the brush on the outskirts of a golf club. He now knew that even if he stopped running, they wouldn’t stop chasing. 

Using the money he’d been gifted, he moved to Opulence. He had nothing other than the clothes on his back and was fearful to speak too much to anybody on the off chance they knew of Bea and her family. Now confident with his shifting abilities, he spends a large portion of his time as a wolf, both for hunting purposes and for surviving the challenges that come with living outdoors. More recently, he’s occasionally headed into the town, worried that he’ll lose his humanity if he spends forever in isolation.

“what power did he attain when settling in opulence?”

Grey gained the ability to shift fully at will with ease. He also gained strong hunting instincts and a keen eye.

this character is…retired

[lunaekalenda]

I'm sorry for sending yet ANOTHER request, I just love your writing so much 😭

What about Soulmate AU where you can feel the pain your soulmate feels?

The reader is Zeke's soulmate even though she's from Paradis and with the Scouts, so she definitely feels the pain when Levi decapitates Zeke (he killed Zeke before the rumbling begins).

(I was thinking of this as platonic levi x reader? The Soulmate thing is with Zeke just to be more dramatic 😂)

hiii!! omg thank you so much! also your ideas are really cool, and i’m really happy to see your user on my requests!! <3 i hope you like it <3

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❁ levi x reader, zeke x female!reader (kind of ??)

❁ death, spoilers from the manga, blood, again swearing against zeke lol, canon violence, non canon events!!!! btw sasha is alive because sasha <3

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

You feel small punctures on your hands. Again. It’s been a whole day feeling them, as if you are squeezing needles in your hands. It was harmful and really uncomfortable, but when you looked at your hands, they were smooth, without a cut. 

“That’s because is your soulmate who’s getting hurt there.” Hange told you, once you found them out of their tent. They were holding a book, and Moblit was following them, carrying some more. Hange looks at you, their gaze low, looking directly to your hands. “Anyway, whoever your soulmate is, is probably making you regret all your training period.” You laugh. You were specially headstrong during the training. It didn’t care how many times you fell or how many wounds you got. You kept training and fighting without a break. Maybe your soulmate felt all that pain too.

In the other side of the map, Zeke Jaeger is crushing rocks with his hands. The little fragments of broken rocks make cuts on his hands. He clenches his jaw and throws them, hitting some enemies. He feels Porco’s titan fast steps behind, probably trying to break the machines. Also Pieck’s fighting near him, as usual. He feels all his body tired and the blood in his hands is starting to get dry. But he keeps fighting. Maybe that’s why destiny made him your soulmate.

Sometimes, you can’t even differentiate if you’re feeling bad or if he is the one feeling bad. Your bodies are connected in a way that even biology can’t explain. But, considering that you never met - or so do you think.- it's kind of weird. Having a soulmate wasn’t rare, half of the population has it. You’re meant to find each other and be together. You walk back to your barricade, thinking about it. Maybe he’s one of the Corps soldiers. Someone who might be very resistant to pain. Someone strong and...

“Oi, have you seen Hange?” Levi asks. He’s in front of you, and he has some books in his hands. It seems like he’s helping Hange as well. You look behind you, where Hange was a minute earlier. They're gone.

"They were here a couple of seconds aho, but I guess they moved..." You saw Levi was looking behind him, to a table full of books. You guessed that all those heavy books were the ones Levi and Hange were moving. You take some of them as well. "It's not necessary..." he says, but you're taking four books now. Walking again towards him, you look around, searching Hange and Moblit.

"Didn't they told you were they are moving the books?" Levi sighed before clicking his tongue.

"That four eyes... They didn't say anything about it because I told them to leave the war room free for new reunions, so they moved all theyr shit." he says. The books are heavy and he has been holding them for a time now, so he's kinda edgy. He walks towards a tent in the sand, near the one where the Special OPs squad sleep. Connie was out of the tent, looking at the sea. Behind him, Sasha was taking care of a bouquet of white roses.

Pain hitted you like a train, literally. Zeke's body was so tired that the train hitted his titan's legs, making him and you feel the pain. You fell, crying of the high level of dolor. Levi left the books near you, on the floor, and Sasha and Connie walked fast toward you. You were there, feeling like your legs got crushed. Levi took your boots out easily, and, looking at you for consent, raised your pants to the knee. Your legs where perfect, as always. You couldn't stop crying. Even when Levi, a total hater of affection and physical contact, started to massage them carefully. Sasha took some cold water from the sea on a jar, and put the cold metal jar on your muscles, trying to ease the pain. Connie gave you potable water.

In Marley, Zeke was also feeling a lot of pain. His legs were totally crushed and smashed because of the fucking train. He knows that his human form will repair his muscles once he's out of the titan, so that's why, searching Porco's company, he leaves the titan's body. Porco covers him while his intern muscles get easily cured. In Paradis, your legs start to feel a bit better, and you're able to feel something more than pain on them. Something like the smooth touch of the Captain. Levi keeps massaging them, doing little circles and looking at you.

"Are you feeling better?" he asks. You nod. "What happened?"

Since everybody respects someone who has a soulmate, Levi is not different to the rest. Once he knows that you have a soulmate, you'll have 0 opportunities with him. Even knowing that he probably doesn't feel the same for you, having that little unknow will play at your favor. If he does feel something, you'll just ignore all the pain your soulmate is giving you. After all, you two are people with different lives and nothing more than a stupid bond between you. You have no affection towards him because you don't know who he is, to begin with. And, also. maybe the feelings you have developed for the Captain doesn’t let you think about any other person. 

At least from now.

“Yes, yes. Thanks, Captain.” he shakes his head, as if he was saying that you shouldn’t thank him. 

“Your pain has been increasing lately, doesn’t it?” he asks, in a whisper. It’s normal for him to care about you, after all you’re one of his soldiers. You move your legs. They just feel heavy, but the pain has been gone. “You should rest here a bit. I’ll call Connie . He’ll make you company while the meal isn’t ready.”

Levi lefts the tent quick. You have been here stuck for months now, after you killed all the titans left in the island. You know there’s a bigger enemy than the colossus humans that killed a lot of your comrades and friends. You remember once the pain was so bad, like if someone had cut your arms and legs and then just put a thunderspear on your abdomen. And it exploded. You were conscious of every single organ of your body. You were unable to walk for a week. Your soulmate was really fast healing, so you have the belief that he is a titan. No doubt.

Ha, you’re bonded with a titan shifter. What if that one is the one that Levi promised to kill?

You shake your head when Connie enters.

“Oh, wow, you look better!” he says. You smile at him and he sits near to you. Connie is basically your best friend here, and he was always trying to make you feel better. 

“Yes, I’m feeling way better.” you answer. Connie gives you a glass of water, “Thanks.”

“Your soulmate must be having fun, doesn’t he?” Connie and Hange were the only ones you told that you’ve probably a soulmate, but lately, the magnitude of the pain that man has to resist was a really obvious indicator of your bond. Probably, the Captain also knows it just because of intuition.

“He definitely is. for sure.” You say, after drinking all the glass. Connie puts it on a near table. You let out a sigh. “Y/N, listen, maybe you should tell the Captain. Like, he’s the Captain of our squad. What if your soulmate looses an arm and you fell in the middle of a battle?” But you don’t want to leave the Corps. They are your family, your most treasured ones. 

“But I don’t want to leave...” you whisper. Connie sighs and looks at the front, through the window.

“You don’t have to leave. Just work here, as a healer, or...”

“I want to fight. With you all. I don’t want to make Levi lose another soldier. We’re just seven on his squad. He needs all the people capable to follow his pace.” It was true. Armin, Mikasa, Jean, Connie, Sasha and you, with Levi, are the most capable soldiers of the army. That’s why all of you are in the Special Ops squad. 

Later, Jean brought you the dinner. It took you a bit to start to train again, and time passed. Eren announced the rumbling, and Levi told you all the plans for the mission. 

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"Just execute the plan. We just have to stop the rumbling, even if that means killing Eren." The plan made all your comrades uncomfortable. Specially the ones that suffered with him all this time, those who saw him grow and express his ideals. That’s what you were thinking when, time later, you’re fighting hand to hand with the squad. Titans are everywhere and you only can see blood and hear screams. Jean is near Pieck and there’s a weird sensation growing up in your chest. Like if you knew what was about to happen to your soulmate. Levi was behind you. A big stalactite can be seen, at a figure seems to be on top of it. A blonde boy you met, knowing that he was a shifter. You can see him from Falco's titan's back.

Maybe he is your soulmate?

If someone kills him and your supposition is true, that means you’ll be in problems. 

Levi looks at him, his gaze full of anger. He goes near him, using the ODMS and, taking out his blades, before you could react, he decapitates him.

You felt like your soul was about to leave your body, how your head hurts so much that it seems like it was about to fell off your shoulders. You can’t breath and your lungs seem to stop working. Levi comes back and found you screaming of pain.

“y/n!” he yelled. Taking you with him, he puts you again on Falco’s titan back. You search his eyes, lying down on the soft back of the titan.

“He... was m-my... soulmate.” Levi opened his eyes with horror.

“I’m so sorry, I... I didn’t know that.” he says.

“I didn’t either.” You say, but your voice was breaking because of the pain screams. You hold your head, like if you wanted to avoid it from getting parted away from your body. It hurts so much.

Levi holds your head softly. Your neck feels really bad, but it is starting to heal slowly.

“Sorry.” he whispers. “I didn’t want to hurt you in any way.” It was okay. No one knew that Zeke, the man that he promised to kill, was your soulmate. So it was not his fault. Your face is full of tears, but you show him a little smile.

“It’s okay. After all, we weren't mean to be together.”

“I’m sure you’ll find a better man.” he says, while Falco keeps flying.

I hope so, you think, while his warm hands caress your hair, trying to make all that pain disappear.

[alittlewhump]

Unbidden - Act 1, chapter 4

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Content warnings: fantasy violence, death mention, fantasy religion

They had travelled for another half a day before reaching the remains of the little town. It had been thoroughly sacked, most of the buildings now just burned out husks. Blaise was staring down at the body of what had presumably been one of the inhabitants. Morgan could tell she was distressed, and she was also sending signals of anger. It was becoming apparent that anger was a standard underpinning of most of her other emotions. Her hands were balled into fists at her sides.

"He was just a kid."

Morgan didn't know how to respond. The boy had been prepubescent, the small size of his body accentuated by the large and ungainly prosthetic leg still partially attached under one knee. The forces of darkness did not discriminate, equitable in their ruthlessness. That would not be the correct thing to say right now. He ventured a soft "Yes," to which Blaise did not respond. He raised a hand, thinking to lay it on her shoulder in a gesture of sympathy he'd seen many times, but then let it fall back to his side. She would likely only take offense, not comfort, from that action. He didn't particularly like touching other people anyway, if it could be avoided.

Morgan squinted instead toward the ruined town, looking more with his mind than with his eyes. There were more like the boy, all adults but recently deceased, their bones partially scattered above the ground. It was most often undead that left their victims this way, torn asunder carelessly. They were slow enemies whose movements were easy to predict. Should be simple enough. Hopefully the scholar they sought had been fast enough to hide himself away or make an escape.

Morgan's skeletons turned in unison, raising their swords in challenge. He often relied on their perception to fill in the gaps where he wasn't paying attention. There was a yelp, and a small red demon scampered out from behind a ruined building. It didn't make it far. Before the skeletons had a chance to charge, Blaise had planted an arrow between its shoulders. Its dying cry echoed through the remnants of the town, prompting a rush of activity. It seemed a number of demons had settled in. The undead had simply been scavenging, then. That could complicate things.

Morgan urged his skeletons forward, taking a step back as he started on a clay golem. He'd managed to get the time down to about thirty seconds, but it was evident that wouldn't be fast enough for most combat situations. He would have to keep working at it.

Blaise was proving to be an extremely skilled archer. Her shots were both quick and accurate, devastating to the smaller demons. It wasn't just the imps, though; there was a group of larger demons as well, goatlike bipeds wielding wicked-looking glaives. They moved to flank the invading humans, but Morgan spotted the maneuver and commanded his minions to intercept the closest ones. Their awareness was reasonably comprehensive, but his own let him down. If the goatman behind him hadn't bleated as it raised its weapon to strike, it could easily have finished him with a single blow.

He twisted sideways, narrowly avoiding the strike. Drawing his sword was easier from the far hip after all. He plunged it blindly into the demon's middle before it had a chance to raise its weapon a second time. Accuracy wasn't paramount at the moment, just so long as he got the point far enough in and wrenched to the side with sufficient strength. He jumped back, avoiding the spray of viscera that followed his blade as the demon fell.

He should have been checking for other threats instead; if he had, he might have noticed the small one creeping up behind him, emboldened by the presence of the stronger demons. It swung its blade with a battle cry, slicing into the flesh of Morgan's thigh. He cried out in surprise and pain, lashing out with his shield to gain some distance. The demon was already backing off, its fit of courage fading. It was watching him so intently that it didn't notice the skeleton behind it. A single well-aimed thrust saw it fall with a gurgle.

Morgan pressed a hand to the cut on his leg. The blade hadn't severed anything crucial, but the pain would hamper his mobility and the wound was deep enough to warrant treatment. He ordered the skeleton closer as he felt around in the pouch on his belt, fingers seeking a familiar shape - there. He uncorked the small bottle with his teeth and downed its contents. The taste of the potion lingered on his tongue, but it was mildly sweet and herbaceous, not at all unpleasant. It would only be a few minutes before the injury was fully healed. It already felt a little better.

The few remaining demons had incapacitated the other skeleton but they were fleeing now, not that it was doing them much good in the face of Blaise's arrows. She was merciless and efficient. Morgan could see why Kashya had chosen her for the task. Something was amiss, though. He couldn't quite put his finger on it. He looked around again, and his eyes fell on one of the deceased civilians. That was it - the body showed signs of undead interference, but they had slain only demons. The two types of creatures often coexisted peacefully, so it wasn't likely that one group had driven out the other.

"That's the last of them," Blaise announced, lowering her bow. "Now let's hope we can find this guy quickly so we can leave. I don't like this place."

"It looked like there would be undead, so be - oh, look there-" Something was stirring, far enough away that Morgan couldn't make out exactly what it was, but the movement wasn't promising. He pointed with his sword, his minions already on their way to investigate. Blaise nocked another arrow and raised her bow.

An enormous zombie staggered toward them. Had it been... hiding? Or just somehow unaware of the skirmish? It was surprisingly fast for its size. It was also unexpectedly strong, Morgan realized as it shattered the skeleton's skull with a single powerful strike. Blaise was on the retreat, peppering it with arrows that didn't seem to be having much effect. The clay golem made it stumble with a blow to its side, but it struck out in retaliation with such force that the construct crumbled to pieces. Morgan weighed his options quickly. It was too fast for another golem. A new skeleton might be fast enough, but it would only be able to serve as a momentary distraction. With his injured leg he wouldn't even be able to outrun this one if he fled, never mind what that might mean for Blaise. He had to find a way to separate the head from the body, or destroy the brain. Not ideal, given his limited physical capacity, but then again neither was dying.

Blaise called out, "Some support would be nice!" Yes, it - oh, she meant from him. The zombie was focused on her as the only aggressor. He did have the weaponry better suited to dispatch it, if only he could reach its head. He struck the hilt of his sword against his buckler and shouted, hoping the noise would get its attention. It did not. If it was going to ignore him, maybe he could use that to his advantage.

Morgan darted in, intending to strike at the zombie's knees. Joints were always vulnerable, good targets for incapacitating an enemy. He was too slow - it finally turned toward him with a fierce swing of its arm. He managed to get his shield up in time, but the blow still lifted him off his feet. The uneven terrain and his injury made for a poor landing but an idea sparked as he stumbled, falling into a crouch with one hand braced on the ground.

He sent a tendril of magic shooting forth through the soil, just a small one for the sake of speed. If this didn't work, he might not have the time for a second try. The earth in front of the zombie rose up and curled back to cover its feet. It was not coordinated enough to avoid the crude trap. Morgan picked himself up as the undead fell to its knees, finally bringing its weak point within range. He quickly positioned the tip of his sword at the base of its skull and gave it a hard thrust, pushing with the force of both hands. There was a snap as the spine gave way, and the body collapsed.

That had felt a little too close for comfort. Morgan summoned another skeleton and sent it to scout for any more undead. Another surprise like that would be disastrous. If he kept a steady trickle of magic flowing between himself and the skeleton, he would be able to tell immediately if it had been damaged or destroyed.

"All right, now let's look for your man Deckard. Carefully. There had better not be any more of these big fuckers lurking around." Blaise nudged the body gingerly with her foot.

They moved through the town warily at first, growing more relaxed as it became apparent that they had fully cleared out its new inhabitants. A few of the buildings had cellars dug out beneath them, but they had all been empty. It was starting to look like there had been no survivors at all when Blaise spotted something.

"Wait, is that him?"

Morgan followed her gaze to a crudely constructed cage leaning up against a building. He had assumed the prone figure inside it, half hidden by rags, had been another body. But when he reached out, first with his mind alone and then with an extended arm to better direct the magic, there was no response - no bones he could use, unlike the rest of the unfortunate townsfolk.

"That one's not dead," he said, moving in closer. The pale figure was unconscious, yes, but still living. It looked like it might be an old man.

"How do you - ugh, I don't want to know, never mind." Blaise made it to him first, reaching through the bars of the cage to check for a pulse at the old man's throat. She must have found one, since her next move was to shake his shoulder gently.

He startled awake, eyes wide. "Back! Back, foul demons!" he cried out.

"Whoa, hey there, it's okay. Don't worry, my name is Blaise and I'm here to help you. The demons are gone. Are you all right? You hurt at all?" Her voice was reassuring, soothing. Her features had softened into an expression of genuine concern.

"You... oh, thank heavens! It's so good to see a friendly face. No, my dear, I'm a little worse for the wear but I'm not injured. I don't suppose you might have some water to share, would you? I'm absolutely parched."

Morgan had reached the cage by that time, and passed his waterskin through the bars. Blaise moved to examine the lock on the cage, giving it a very brief examination before fishing out two slender metal tools from her pack. "I'll have you out of there in no time," she reassured him as she began working at the lock.

The scouting skeleton hadn't encountered anything of note, but the earlier surprise was still troubling Morgan. He decided to raise another golem to join the perimeter guard, just to be on the safer side. To his surprise, the old man brightened as the shape began to take form.

"Ah, geomancy! It's been a rather long time since I've seen that particular school of magic. And so sombre, too - would I be right in guessing you to be followers of Rathma?" The old man pulled himself upright, leaning on the cage bars for support as the lock cracked open in Blaise's hands.

"Just me."

"Just him."

Blaise seemed surprised by their response in unison, but it didn't appear to faze the other man at all. "Well," he said, "whatever your origins, I'm grateful for the rescue. My name is Deckard Cain." That was excellent news. A stroke of luck that the sole survivor was the man they had been looking for. He kept talking as he stepped out of the cage. "When the demons descended, I was sure I was not long for this world. I can't imagine what possessed them to lock me up in there, but it certainly saved me from sharing a fate with everyone else here." He looked sadly at one of the human bodies, a woman who appeared to have died in the street, reaching toward the door of a house. "I only wish there was something I could have done to prevent this tragedy. These were good people. They didn't deserve this."

"I could give them their final rites," Morgan suggested. Nothing could undo what had happened, but at least the dead could be laid to rest properly. It might give some measure of comfort to the old man as well. All things considered, it felt like an acceptable delay.

Cain laid a hand on Morgan's shoulder. He flinched only slightly at the unexpected contact. "Thank you, friend. It is kind of you to offer, and I can think of no one better than a priest of Rathma to lay these people to rest."

Blaise coughed. "Are you sure about that? You... you know what they do with skeletons, right?"

"My dear, I assure you there are none more suited to care for the dead. I visited a temple of Rathma once for several months in my younger days, far to the southeast..."

Morgan half listened as he stowed his shield. It was a simple enough line to draw, though it seemed unlikely that Blaise would be interested in the particulars: bodies that had been consecrated, no matter the particulars of the faith that informed the process, felt different than ones that had not received that treatment. They were easy to sense and avoid, and besides that, they were considerably harder to raise. Powerful practitioners were capable of such feats, but despite their reputation, priests of their Order gave the dead every courtesy they would afford the living. It wasn't uncommon to meet resistance even in the dead that had passed on unremarked; in these cases, a necromancer could either leave the spirit be or pass it through the veil as they deemed appropriate. Morgan preferred the option of assisting with the passing on, though he hadn't ever personally had the opportunity. It felt like it would be better than just leaving them to linger.

The first stages of preparation for this particular ceremony didn't require much concentration, just some physical effort to collect and lay out the deceased. Including the boy from the outskirts of the town, there were six bodies to inter. There was a good spot near the central part of the town, likely once a market of some sort. It seemed unlikely that anyone would be rushing to rebuild the town any time soon, he reasoned.

"Excuse me, young man." Morgan stopped to look at Cain, who was wearing an apologetic smile. "I hate to be a bother, but..." He gestured toward the remains of the enormous zombie. "This gentleman is... or was, rather... Griswold, the town blacksmith. Stone deaf but a heart of gold in him. He did great things, in life. Is there any way you could include him as well?"

"Yes, of course." Morgan considered the body for a moment before calling his golem back over from where it had been patrolling the area. Even with its help, it was difficult to maneuver the corpse over to the others. But they managed eventually, making him the seventh in the line. Cain chattered on to Blaise the entire time, but clearly he was also paying some attention to Morgan.

"That's everyone," he confirmed before Morgan had even opened his mouth to ask. "It saddens me to see this lively town reduced to so little. Rest well, my friends."

That was a recognizable cue. Morgan began by consecrating the zombie, drawing a small phial of oil from his chest pocket and anointing its head and hands. The oil glowed faintly as he said a brief incantation, an ancient prayer. The first step completed, he switched to a different oil and drew a simple sigil on the forehead of each of the deceased. This anointment was to help guide the spirits up to Anu. As he recited the liturgy, he was surprised to hear Cain's voice joining his own during the repeated segments. He filed that away to consider later. Right now he needed to concentrate.

Seven was a lot of bodies to inter, but if he let the constructs fall and paced himself he could probably manage. He knelt by Griswold and touched the earth. Carefully, slowly, it parted beneath the giant of a man. Once the body was several feet deep, the dirt filled in on top of him, leaving a small mound on the surface. The effort left him slightly winded. It had been a good idea to start with the largest. The next two were easier, but the cumulative strain was growing faster than he'd anticipated. Sweat was beginning to bead on his forehead and he'd lost his breath again. Better to pause now than to have to stop in the middle of an interment, he decided.

He took a small bottle from his belt, uncorked it and tossed back the bitter bluish liquid in one motion, kneeling again before the dizziness set in. The familiar buzz of magical energy crackled through him. It itched under his skin. He would have preferred to rest instead of taking the potion, but interrupting the ceremony was not an option. The whole point was to respectfully lay them to rest; stopping for a break would have felt disrespectful. He had to press on.

Despite his measured approach, Morgan was trembling with exhaustion by the time the last body was safely entombed. Seven had turned out to be too many. The potion had helped, but its borrowed energy left as suddenly as it came, and the body shakes it left in its wake were uncomfortable. He fell into a cross-legged position, elbows braced on his knees, head hanging as his chest heaved. Meditation wasn't going to cut it after this. He was going to need real sleep. Still, it was satisfying to feel he'd done a good job of the burial ceremony. He was also grateful that Blaise had elected to keep watch during the proceedings. He'd been forced to abandon his minions to save energy. Had he been alone, safety would have been a serious concern.

Blaise cleared her throat. "Not to kill the moment or anything, but we need to start going before it gets dark. It's a long way back to the Sisterhood."

"Perhaps I can help with that," Cain said. Morgan raised his head to see him produce a small scroll from the pockets of his robe. "This is a scroll of town portal. Have you ever used one before?" Blaise shook her head. "Oh, it's very simple. You just need to picture a place in your head as you read it, and it will open a portal to that place. It only works for human settlements, and the place has to be within a certain distance. But if your description is accurate, as I'm sure it is, the Sisterhood of the Sightless Eye should meet those requirements." He held the scroll out for Blaise to take. "I must admit I've never visited, so I can't use this to get to our destination."

Blaise took the scroll and opened it, peering at its contents. Nothing happened. She turned it sideways, then upside down. No portal materialized. She looked up at Cain. "Am I missing something here? I thought this was supposed to be easy."

He frowned. "It should be. Let me look - no, no, the scroll is in order. It should work for you if you're following the instructions. Unless - well, there are a few reasons it might not be working. It could be a matter of lineage, for instance. Were your parents both human?"

Blaise stared at him as though he'd just grown another head. "What else would they be?"

"I've used those scrolls before," Morgan said, rising unsteadily to his feet. He had used the portals fairly regularly, running errands during his training. A throbbing ache was building behind his eyes, and he wanted very much to rest. He was seriously considering curling up in one of the ruined buildings at this point. But that wouldn't take the other people into consideration. Assuming the portal scroll worked, it would be the best course of action to take.

Blaise held it at arm's length. "If you can make it work, go ahead. But if not, we start walking."

Morgan took the scroll, scanning the familiar runes. It wasn't reading, exactly, but they started to glow all the same. He thought about the rogue encampment, focusing on the spot just outside the gates where he'd first waited for Blaise. A shimmering blue circle materialized in front of him, the image of the camp faintly distinguishable in its centre. It stretched until it was big enough to walk through. No problem with the scroll, then.

"Magnificent!" Cain clasped his hands together. "It will be wonderful to be amongst people again. Please, after you."

Morgan would have preferred not to be the first one out of the portal, but Blaise wasn't moving to enter and he didn't have the energy to try to sway her. He stepped into the portal. It was like walking down a short hallway, the distance to the destination collapsed into a few steps. As he stepped out of the portal, he found a sword pointed at his face. His hands came up automatically in a gesture of surrender. Of course the rogues would be suspicious if they weren't accustomed to using this type of magic. That was precisely why he hadn't wanted to lead.

"Oh, it's you." Kashya lowered her sword. "Where's Blaise? Did you find Deckard Cain?"

"They are following," he said, letting his hands fall as he stepped to the side of the portal. He hoped they were following. He was too tired to explain if they weren't.

Sure enough, Cain emerged a few seconds later, peering around. "So this is the Sisterhood of the Sightless Eye! I've heard much about you. I wonder if you would indulge an old man's curiosity. I have some questions for you..." He had honed in on Akara without hesitation, taking her by the arm. She appeared surprisingly amenable; something about him seemed to put people at ease.

Blaise came through shortly after, straightening when she spotted Kashya. "Ma'am."

"Give me a full report."

The commander turned on her heel, going back into the encampment, and Blaise followed her. Good. That meant nobody wanted to talk to Morgan, and he could get some rest. He tore the scroll in half, disrupting the magic holding the portal open. Only living humans could use these portals, but it still felt safer to close it behind him. Unlike the others, he did not enter the encampment. Now was not the time to solicit an invitation. He'd noted a large, sturdy willow tree outside the northern corner of the rogues' camp. He dragged his weary body over to it, nestled in against its trunk, and promptly lost consciousness.

[hei-ch0u]

Oh boy. Here goes... Shingeki no Kyojin Final chapter (139) thoughts and analysis ✰

Well, where do I even begin to accumulate my thoughts on the final chapter of Shingeki no Kyojin? Even after some time to reflect and read the chapter many times, over and over - I’m still going to struggle to form this analysis. But, alas I shall try my best despite this.

I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this and understand my own views of the final chapter. Proceed with caution - ⚠️ spoilers ahead ⚠️

This chapter and ending overall has left me with a love/hate relationship with the overall tale in full. I’d even go as far as saying it has tainted my view slightly of the entire series in one way or another and I will never look at it the same way I did - as much as I wish I could. My reasoning for the love/hate relationship I have will come, but, I want to start off by saying that despite it’s ending I will always appreciate this story and Isayama for his work, even if I myself don’t approve of his steering towards the ending.

It is just like I said in my theory, the thing we all need to recognise with this story is that the characters we love and have cherished, were never going to get exactly what they desired and if anything this chapter is a clear indication of that fact. It has been a story that was paved for a bitter, somewhat ‘bittersweet’ ending (yes, I hoped it wouldn’t be in the form of ‘that’, but it was). It is just as Mikasa said - “The world is cruel and merciless, but it is also beautiful”. This tale became the typical embodiment of humanity and how ruthless it can be.

Again, like I said in my theory, it was heavily foreshadowed that Eren was playing devil’s advocate and might have to sacrifice his freedom in this life to save the ones who meant the most to him. We heard hints in OST’s such as My War, Red Swan, Vogel Im Kafig, among others…

“Angel playing disguise with Devil’s face”

“I’ll cry for you in a dream”

“All of my kingdom, for your return, I’d let it burn!”

“Spread your wings, which are dreaded in blood”

“And eternity as you, fly to heaven”

“Like a fallen angel”

“Looking down from above I feel awful”

“Every living being dies someday, whether we are ready to die or not”

“Is that the angel who flew down from the twilight sky?”

“Is that the devil who crawled out from the crevice?”

“Tears, anger, compassion, cruelty, peace, chaos, faith, betrayal.”

It was foreshadowed, all of those things in the last example is humanity in a nutshell. The use of birds to symbolise the dead was shown on multiple occasions. Hell, even in the Levi ova, his friends are shown as 2 birds above him as he continues forward. It didn’t shock me that Eren’s soul was represented or “reincarnated” in the form of a bird - simply because birds are the most free creatures on our planet, they can fly over land, sea and maintain the air around them. Realistically, we should’ve analysed the birds presence more (it was even implied in the opening trailer for season 4. Falco awoke to a bird flying above him, we saw the bird present many times in even past seasons and don’t get me started on how many times it was present in the manga). Our Angel was Eren. He was a fallen angel - a slave to the story and what it means to be human, to feel deeply and make sacrifices. He was never a monster, just a pawn in a wicked game.

For a split moment of initial shock, I let the “judging a book by its cover” ideal kick in. After calming down and having access to proper translations, again I can’t say I love this ending or hate it - it has the bittersweet notion that was intended, but it was also lukewarm. It is not perfect by any means, there are some plot holes and loose ends that could have been tied up by extension. However, Isayama maybe intended for it to remain open for interpretation. Something of which, I’ll reveal what I personally took from the ending.

One thing I am surely certain of, is that I can hold my hands above my head and say this chapter 100% embodied my love for my favourite character - Eren Jaeger. He had such a tragic outcome, he did it all for his friends and loved ones. He was never free, not in life and partially not in death. He was a broken child, in a broken world with a broken fate of shouldering mass amounts of responsibility with no idea of how to change or control the past, present and future. To witness your best friend talking of all the things he was going to see, yet knowing you wouldn’t be there to see it yourself. To know the girl who was there for him forever and always, could never be his to cherish. He had no freedom to do so. To live the life he wanted to, he would have died anyway. If he had ran off with Mikasa, he would have damned his friends. The life he wanted was not feasible, therefore he chose to sacrifice his desires so his friends could live long lives, unlike the one he was damned to. He was a character who was torn along all sides of the coin. Torn between his desires, his duty and his self - all while experiencing memories from all angles. He was not a monster or a psychopath and I won’t let others spit on his name due to their lack of analysis and empathy. He is human. He is allowed to feel. He isn’t pathetic for wanting to live, for wanting to be with his friends or the girl he loves. He is 19. Can you really say you wouldn’t feel the same? It is natural to be frustrated at your life being ripped from under your feet at such a young age. He was damned if he did, damned if he didn’t. Look at his face in paths when he talks with Armin, he is devastated and he had no solution.

However, I do believe he will be reunited with his friends once more. After all, the scouts were reunited in death, so why shouldn’t he? His friends will not live in vain, his sacrifice will mean something. They will live their life to the fullest and find peace in life and then in death - they have Eren to thank for that. Another misconception I want to pick out of the fandom is that they did not condone genocide, they did not thank Eren for ridding the population of 80%. Armin states it as an “error”. What they did do, was acknowledge Eren’s sacrifice for them to live and that they understood it’s not what he wanted himself, but that due to unseen forces. - did he really have a choice? It is not by any means perfect, but it gives them freedom to live out with the walls - was this not Eren’s dream? To be free, not confined within the walls by Titans. He did exterminate all titans, that is one goal Eren Jaeger accomplished. We don’t know the full extent of the power of the attack titan or the founding titan, this is one of the open plot holes. Eren himself explains this, he himself has no clue and his head is a mess - is it any shock that his head is a mess? People would go crazy over less. He was a pawn in a story with no happy ending. At least not for him.

Even in the bird reincarnation theory, I hope he is happy and free. Free to roam the skies, perch upon the tallest mountains, titter along the grass banks of the world and watch over his comrades, his friends, the ones he loves deeply… The tragic protagonist I will always remember. (Especially as one who was done so dirty by his author)

There was so many routes this manga could have taken, fan theories proved this and I do think the ending could have been executed better. We were not getting a happy ending, it is not happy by all means. Those characters left have to live in the aftermath, aware of their friends sacrifice and all he had to put himself through for them to live the lives they themselves desired. My favourite quote will always be:

“Don’t pity the dead. Pity the living”

Mikasa lost her family in more ways than one, she has to live a life where she didn’t get the one person she desired more than anything, but I believe she will move on and Eren will be by her side the entire time until they are reunited in death. Levi is the same, he lost everyone and whoever his love may have been - Erwin, Hanji, Petra (who knows). Either way, he didn’t have those loved ones around in the end. But, he no longer has to fight for survival and can spend the remainder of his time resting until the day in the future he can be reunited with his comrades, friends and even kick Eren a big one, ruffle his hair, tell him its okay and tell him all the things he wanted to tell him like he said. Armin lost his best friend, he held the burden above his head that he himself killed Eren and not Mikasa. However, he has an abundance of friends, he has Annie and he can travel the world like he desired - like Mikasa, he will have Eren by his side for the remainder of his time.

Jean can meet the woman of his dreams and have the children like he desired, knowing that even in their silly quarrels - Eren was loyal to him always. Connie can have his mother back, his family and move on. Reiner can live, not die like he once desired and live on knowing of Eren’s sacrifice, that he wasn’t a monster himself. He is free from the curse, as is Annie, Pieck and Falco. The warriors have their families back. Gabi and Falco can be together unlike their comparisons, sad, but fitting. They are in Paradis, a place we never expected them to be in the end, advocating for change alongside Onyakapon looking after their elder, Levi, alongside them. On Eren’s death anniversary, it is implied they all return to his grave to be together, none of them are alone like we initially thought. Mikasa is not alone in Paradis since it is implied that Levi, Onyankapon, Gabi, Falco, Historia even… still live amidst the walls - I think it would be wasteful to assume such a strong character secludes herself after the love of her life’s death. She does not have to love another man, she can choose to live her life for herself, a long one alongside her friends. This manga has never necessarily needed to have love stories, they are implied, but not needed. For life itself is the embodiment of their freedom.

This above is the rosy way of looking at it and it’s what I personally will take from it. I overall think it is terrible writing and use of dialogue - there’s no denying it. I myself as a writer and artist would have done it differently. Isayama has created a manga with a tragic story that reveals the raw, tainted feeling of what it’s like to be human. We all want things, we all have desires…but we don’t always get them, no matter how hard we try, some will slip from our grasps. That is life, no matter the universe. Yes. But, I do think in ways Isayama did taint and obliterate Eren as a character. This I am disappointed in. It is a typical author ideal of damning his protagonist and the sad thing about being a stories protagonist - you risk being ruined due to being written so complex initially that the author loses sight of how to conclude your arc respectfully. I believe from what we have been shown, he would not have accepted his death that easily and would fight for another way. Although, I cannot blame him as I myself would have felt defeated, suicidal and depressed at learning everything he did after his contact with Historia at such a young age. Remember, how you are brought up in an already cruel world is key - he didn’t stand a chance. But alas, I still feel he would’ve fought. This Eren is not the Eren we saw the majority of the manga, but then again he did change and I feel so sorry that the Titan power had that effect on him.

This is the character development true Eren stans are enraged with. TATAKAE! Fight the attack titan, fight the founding titan, fight against your cruel fate - don’t succumb to defeat. There is always another way. I don’t accept this version of Eren, due to the development we saw built by Isayama of his character, I can’t. It leaves so many gaps among other plot reveals. I don’t see what was accomplished. Eren’s being, his life, was a ploy to keep the other characters we care about alive, but at what cost ? If I was Eren’s friend, I would go forward like he wanted me to, but I could never forget the burden he bared and what he had to go through and what he did to achieve that outcome for me. I would forever be sad. I would be living in a world much like this one, lacking in peace and serenity and above all is that not what we all desire in one way or another? He did not necessarily know the Dina titan would go for his mother, but he had to direct it away from Bertholdt since in the timeline it was not his time to die. Always remember the theory of time, one thing changed, drastically changes the outcome. He did not want civilians or people within Paradis to die, it became collateral damage and no one would be able to fight for some time because of the 80% notion. He gave them time to live, time to change things to the best of their abilities and experience all they possibly could. They became the ‘heroes’, but again, at what cost?

Now, to the plot holes and answers I feel needed to be present for the story to knit together in a better way. This will be less “paragraph” based and more pointed, since…well these things were not explained. Majority of potential foreshadowing was swept under the rug like it meant nothing to bring about the lukewarm feeling I was talking about.

The alien like hallucigenia, what exactly was its purpose? It’s reason for being? It disappeared and ceased to exist. No mention of how it came to be. Even Ymir just vanished. Everything ceased to exist and Eren himself couldn’t understand Ymir’s reasoning other than being able to witness love. This seemed to be cop out on Isayama’s part.

Historia’s pregnancy was heavily implied and emphasised on within the manga, making readers think it meant something (when a creator zones in on these things, its usually for further plot reveal) Her character development was destroyed and she deserved better. She sidelined herself and stayed away till the final moment where it is implied she and Armin will become the negotiators of a new world, all while housing tyrants (Jaegerists). Again a further implication of Shonen manga and its poor interpretation of women.

The conclusion to Ymir and Eren’s particular character arcs was shocking and this can’t be dismissed. We needed both their sides of things to explain more. It lacked real conclusion and didn’t match up to past events or character development. This chapter should have purely been an Eren POV with the ending moments of how the scouts moved on. Of course this couldn’t have been done in 1 chapter, hence the recognition that this manga needed ‘more’ and it wasn’t enough to tie it all together. Another flaw in Isayama’s writing and continuity.

The Ackermans? Don’t get me started. My theory again will entail my rage about this one. Did the Ackerman power cease to exist like the titan curse? What is their origin story? To imply the Ackerman blood concept in all its parallels and foreshadowing to not even have the 2 remaining characters from said bloodline talk about their shared experience in thorough detail is such an abysmal hole in plot. Especially with it being heavily emphasised throughout the entire manga.

I barely saw any signs of Eren being in love with Mikasa? If this was the case, then it should have been shown in the manga and emphasised like isayama did with many other things that eventually had no meaning. I always viewed their relationship as very toxic to both sides and needed amending. So for Eren to suddenly turn round and say he doesn’t want her to be with another man....I find this a very bad continuation and completely disregards how Eren has been the past 138 chapters. Why was it so hard for him to say these things even before he made contact with historia and unravelled it all? Was it the power of the attack titan preventing him?.... (below)

The attack titan and founding titan, explain how it works. Why does Eren himself not fully understand yet he embodies them? Why could he not have flipped the switch? Why could he not ask for help? Explanation is needed.

All the time loop links diminished to nothing other than Eren’s past, present and future…yet its implied in many characters even in their childhoods mentions of things they could not be aware of. How can it merely be coincidence?

I wholeheartedly believe that this was not the initial ending of Shingeki no Kyojin, specifically because I and a few others I’ve seen noticed the shift in the story around 10 or so chapters ago. It seemed to be going in the route of a few particular fan theories and then suddenly (quite drastically I’ll add) shifted into this ending. I can only theorise that Isayama changed his original ending along the way to please editors and readers in different ways. In interviews past, he has completely contradicted things he has said about the manga and its ending with what he has produced in the final chapter. When you look at it from a marketing point of view as a selling point, if Isayama had killed certain characters like “Levi” for example or left the ending dark as it possibly could have been (something I wouldn’t have put past yams to do) it would be bad from a marketing point given the likes of Levi is the targeted favourite of the series (even with being a side character) and editors would heavily warn him of this.

People are saying that it’s Isayama’s story and editors won’t have influence - you’d be heavily surprised how much the editing team can have influence, especially when a story of this magnitude becomes so popular. I do think in ways, Isayama gave up. As an artist even myself, its very abundantly clear when a fellow creative loses drive and how the concept of something becoming popular can influence you to become bored and look for a way out. Hence, the clear signs of the story coming out as rushed, its all there, the loss of continuity, the holes in plot and even though Isayama’s art can be inconsistently coherent - some parts of the past few chapters weren’t at the full potential we saw previously. We watched him get better to suddenly somehow revert? That to me seems like a creator who had just had enough and maybe in the end chose to veer off his original plan.

Alas! As I said, I will always love Shingeki no Kyojin despite its ending and loose ties, it holds a place in my heart and has been a favourite of mine since my school days. Being an adult now In her 20’s and experiencing the many troubles of what its like to be human and a creative can sympathise with the struggles and stress Isayama would have been under all these years as his manga gradually became the phenomenon it is now. As it is our favourite characters time to rest and move on, it is his also. Although the story is not where I and many others hoped it would go, I still thank him massively for giving me characters like Eren Jaeger, Levi Ackerman, Mikasa Ackerman, Armin Arlert… the list goes on. Thank you for embodying why Eren was my first and last favourite character. Goodbye Shingeki no Kyojin.

[simibraun]

"You taught me the courage of stars before you left How light carries on endlessly, even after death With shortness of breath, you explained the infinite How rare and beautiful it is to even exist

I couldn't help but ask, for you to say it all again I tried to write it down, but I could never find a pen I'd give anything to hear, you say it one more time That the universe was made, just to be seen by my eyes"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzNvk80XY9s

This song is almost like a lamentation to me that I connect Erwin with his father.

The Midnight Sun.

Erwin always held his own personal ideals and motivations inside him ever since his father passed. Since a child, he always had a curiosity about the world, and with his father being a teacher, he taught him and shared many personal ideas and theories about the history of the Walls, and that made him even more curious to learn the truth that lies outside.

How many hours could they've passed together after school, talking and dreaming about these things, how exciting and astounding could all these be for Erwin, hearing his father's theories, carefully listening to his mentor's words and creating worlds and dreams in his mind. Erwin was so excited to share all these with the other kids, but how could an innocent child known what this entails.

"Based on what I knew, my father was killed by the government. Why did he have to die for nothing more than getting close to the truth? My father was killed by human greed.. And by the foolishness of his own son.."

Ever since his father passed, Erwin lived with regrets but also with the purpose to justify his father's death, by finding the answers of the world and prove that his theories are right.

Erwin became a Scout for this reason. He talked with others about these theories on his journey in the Legion, but in time he stopped talking about it, and kept it inside him. Through the years, this purpose became an obsession that changed him a lot, his way of life, way of thinking, abandoning even safety and love, and chose to dive into the Hell outside the Walls, to find these answers he was looking for. It became a life mission for him.

After he became a Commander, he had soldiers following his orders, with inspiring words to fight for Humanity and offer their hearts for the cause. In time he became more cold hearted, fooling his own self and comrades, stepping into corpses for the path to the truth and he realized that in the end he was fighting for himself and for a dream that he only wanted to see.

Erwin ended up suffering restless in his own thoughts, and was enslaved in his own lost self. Even if he had faithful comrades and friends by his side like Mike, Nile and Levi, still, none of them knew his true struggles, and he rarely opened himself to them.

How melancholic could Erwin be through all these years of searching, how patient could he be in each step he made, in order to move forward and being closer to the answers he long wanted to find, how lonely could he be in his personal times filled with guilt for the loss of his father, and also how brave and determined he was to fight against a government and folk who were against the Survey Corps for many years, blaming him as a Commander for the death of soldiers who had families of their own awaiting them in their return, fighting against Titans every time he went outside the Walls, without knowing if this could be the last time for him and that he may never return back. All his years were filled with restless agony.

"What will you do when that dream of yours comes true, what will you do next?"

Only Levi could set him Free from the Hell he was living in. Levi understood that he was suffering, by hearing him talking about his dreams in the Battle of Shiganshina, in the middle of a War, in a life and death situation. Even at that time Erwin would still speak obsessively about his dreams, and in his final moments even then he still was dreaming of something he only wanted to see. In the end it was not a dream, it was torture.

"Everybody had to be drunk on something to keep themselves going. Everyone was a slave to something."

Levi understood that if he would give the serum to Erwin, he would never rest, he wouldn't be revived to be given a chance to live again a normal life, he would be dragged again in the Hell he was living in, and with the Power of the Colossal Titan, he would destroy himself and would be restless even more. At that moment Levi decided that it was time for Erwin to finally rest. Even if it was a very hard choice to make, it was the right one to do, to finally set him free and let him rest in peace.

"You've fought well. It's all thanks to you that we've come this far. Give up on your dream and die."

Erwin had to hear these words from someone. That he gave his everything, and that he did well. That he did more than that. That it is ok not to do something anymore and give up on it. That he is allowed to rest.

"Levi, thank you."

[darkfeyfanatic]

An Unpromised Future  Ch.1

I really want to start writing again so im finally going to start posting this story. 

  --------------------------------------------------

 Riza had a feeling that something was going to happen soon, she only wished she knew what. 

 Standing in the shadows of a cave opening, the woman stared at the horizon. The dark sea stretched out in every direction around her, a sight she had become familiar with since childhood. And just like any other night high beside the sea, it was cold and snowing, not the ideal weather for a jungle fey.

   Wrapping her bright wings around herself tightly, the fey did not move despite what her instincts told her. Some part of herself said she needed to be here.

But again, for what?

   Looking towards the sky Riza took in the position of the moon, it was nearing midnight from what she could guess, and she wanted to return to her nest. She had several things planned the next day, and being well rested would insure she got everything done with time to spare. 

  Just as she turned to leave she took one last look at the cloudy and star filled sky, and saw a dark figure quickly moving through it. Flying through the clouds was another fey, most likely a scout returning late she thought at first.

  But it wasn't.  

  Looking closer she realized that it was two fey, one carrying the other. Never a good sign.

   Watching as the figure flew closer and landed before her she was greeted by the sight of Conall, the leader of the forest clans, and in his arms was a woman Riza had never seen before. The woman was pale, dressed in long black clothing, and a forest fey based on the shape of her dark taloned wings. 

“She’s injured,” Conall said, worry lacing his deep voice. “I pulled her from the sea.” 

   Closing the distance between them Riza examined the unconscious woman. There were no obvious injuries to be found at first glance. But when running her fingers over the woman's sides to check for broken ribs, she felt something warm on the woman's damp dress. 

 Pulling her hand back, the tips of her fingers reflected in the silver moonlight. 

 Blood. 

“Come with me.”

  Being incredibly grateful that she was a healer, Riza led Conall to a small cave with a few barren nest, gesturing towards one. Conall layed the hurt woman down and took a step back, giving Riza room to work. 

 “Where exactly did you find her?” Riza asked as she examined the tear that covered the woman's wound. 

 “Near the human kingdom, just off the coast.” Of course the humans were involved with this, their kind had been slaughtering fey for centuries. 

 “Wake another healer. Tell them to bring water and bandages.” 

 Accepting his task Conall left the room, leaving Riza with the bleeding woman. Quickly checking to see if the woman was breathing properly, thankfully she was, Riza removed the woman’s dress to reveal the injury. It was wasn't too big, probably no bigger than a plumb seed from what she could tell, but was steadily oozing dark blood. 

   Hearing the beating of wings only minutes later, Riza turned to where Conall had left to see another fey rushing towards her. Ranev, skilled forest healer she had worked with many times before. 

 “How bad is it?” Ranev asked as she began to wet rags from the water-skin she carried. Taking a moment first to check the unconscious woman’s pulse and temperature. 

“I’m not sure. The wound seems small, but her magic hasn’t began to heal her yet.” Riza trailed off as she spoke, normally a fey’s magic, no matter how strong or weak, would have already healed a injury like this. So why wasn't hers? Something wasn’t right. 

   As she began using one of the rags to clean away the blood she quickly found her answer. Or, heard it.

 Motioning for Ranev to stop, Riza listened to what she could just barley hear. Leaning closer to the woman’s side she could hear the sound of quiet sizzling. Like the sound of meat being cooked. 

“Iron.” 

  Riza had hardly heard the other healer speak as she placed her hand just above the wound, focusing on the magic that flowed through her as she called if forward to collect into her open hand. Thick strands of golden light wove itself around Riza’s brown fingers, curling and swaying slowly before delving into the wound. 

  Feeling through the golden energy, Riza traveled deep into the wound until she felt something unnatural. Something burning and draining. Pushing her magic further to curl around the iron Riza pulled with vigor, but the iron hardly moved. For a moment she thought that she would not be able to remove it, feeling her magic being slowly drained itself. But to her relief the iron eventually gave away, sliding out of the wound with nothing but a wet squelch. 

   Dropping the iron bolt onto a discarded rag both healers watched as the wound quickly shrunk to half of its size, not fully healed, but it would surely help stop the bleeding. Using the bandages the two women wrapped both the iron wound and any other bleeding injuries the woman had, which was thankfully not many. Once finished, Ranev dressed the woman in a long skirt before removing the wrap on the woman’s head and turning her to lay on her side, fanning out her dark wings like a blanket. 

  “It’s a good thing you’re a spiritual,” Ranev said quietly as she collected the bloodied rags that surrounded them, “I wouldn’t have been able to remove the iron myself. It would have inevitably killed her.” She was right unfortunately. As a spiritual fey Riza had trained for years to control her magic to her fullest ability. But she was still years away from fully mastering her skill to the level the elders had.

   Leaving to tell Conall that the woman would live, Ranev bid Riza goodbye. Riza had ultimately decided to stay with the woman for the remainder of the night, wanting to make sure nothing went wrong with the woman’s health. 

  Making herself comfortable on one of the empty nest Riza attempted to fight the urge to immediately fall asleep, thinking of how the world outside of the nest of origin was becoming even more dangerous for her kind. But even the stressful thoughts of a still dangerous world could not stop sleep from overtaking her. 

  Hours later the fey awoke rubbing the sleep from her eyes, taking in the now bright room of the late morning. Sitting up and stretching out her wings, Riza looked at the the still sleeping woman across from her. Thankfully she was still breathing, and hadn’t moved at all during the night. 

   Finding the discarded rag from the night before, Riza couldn’t help but stare at the iron bolt that it held. The humans were getting far more creative with their weaponry. And if they could down a fully grown fey with such a small piece of iron, then what else were they capable of?  

[attack-on-kiwi]

what are your thoughts on the manga ending?

I feel like I’m one of the few who didn’t mind it. Yeah, there were a couple things I had issues with, but there were just as many components I really enjoyed. I’ll talk a little about it under the cut in order to avoid spoiling.

Attack on Titan 139 spoilers below

I thought that the vision of Armin meeting Eren and Eren explaining his plan was intimate and emotional. Though I don’t agree with some of the steps taken (justifying Ymir’s curse as a consequence of her love for King Fritz) I don’t think it’s done bad enough for it to warrant much of the hate it received. I think with stories like this, it’s extremely difficult to end it on a note that everyone will be happy, and it’s important to respect that the writer is influenced by editors and people on top who might suggest or cut their intentions. Isayama might have wanted it to end like this or be justified like this from the beginning, and I think people are allowed to have their opinions, however I find the crying and threatening I’ve see due to the ending to be quite childish lol.

A point that I’m iffy about is Eren’s sudden confession about Mikasa. A lot of people think it was out of nowhere, and whether you ship them or don’t, it could have been nice to see more development between the two. I don’t think it was out of nowhere. By the end, Eren was so used to lying to his comrades and himself as a way to convince himself of his mission. It was natural for him to repress until Armin finally knocked some sense into him. 

As we know, a good portion of Mikasa’s character is being unyieldingly loyal towards Eren, which is a quality he could easily take advantage of to further his own goals. I also believe that within the setting of Attack on Titan, it’s unreasonable to expect a lot of romantic scenes. We get a few panels of characters blushing around one another, and it should be taken with a grain of salt. I wouldn’t say the two didn’t hae development, it just wasn’t emphasized. Though, you could see Eren’s declaration of wrapping her scarf around her as his most potent confession to her. I thought that was a really good scene that showcased that even though he felt inferior to her in the beginning, he still wanted to ensure her safety. Small (but notable) moments like that are what I think count as development for them. I’ll talk more about Mikasa in a bit.

Personally, I absolutely loved this shot of Armin and Eren embracing one another. There’s a lot I could say about what it represents, such as the two finally finding common ground. Their ideals and missions both led them to the same end, though Eren would be taking the extreme fall for it. I also wonder how long the two of them had gone without a hug or form of physical affection. From a human standpoint, I imagine it must have meant a lot to the two, and I’m happy they shared the hug. I don’t really have a way of properly expressing myself in regards to this, so I’ll just leave it at that. 

Though it was in death, I was glad Mikasa and Armin were finally able to reunite with Eren. This scene honestly gave me chills.

One thing I’d like to mention is the development of comradery between Reiner and Jean. Yes, Reiner eventually ends up gaining the trust of the others as well, but the relationship between these two has always been interesting to me. It was nice to see Reiner presumably check in on Jean out of everyone. 

I would have liked to see snippets of everyone else’s visions of Eren since it seems he visited them as well, but I can see why they would stick to just Armin. However, leaving what he said to Mikasa out of the story leaves room for interpretation. Is the reason she seems at peace due to Eren finally confessing his true feelings, whether they were his intimate romantic feelings or simply his true intentions? Regardless, I would have very much loved to see that, but leaving it a mystery is acceptable as well, since we can form our own conclusions.

The final salute of the scouts. I don’t really know what else to say about this. It felt like a genuinely good conclusion to their mission, and was one of the few conclusions I have no complaints about. 

I thought the reunions were really short and to the point. Seeing Gabi nearly kill Falco was a nice way to lighten the mood and give a sense of normalcy. For me, the scene where Gabi throws Falco cemented that kids could be kids again. 

I might be reaching here with how this scene parallels Armin’s first time defending Eren against the Garrison back in season one. Where Armin was panicking and ran out of the smoke to try and convince them of Eren’s innocence. Seeing how he’s able to power through it now and with the utmost confidence express himself made me really proud. Armin’s character had to be one of the most heart-wrenching yet powerful stories of Attack on Titan. The way everyone looks to him as their leader and the way he accepts his role readily though he knows he still has a lot to learn would make both Eren and Erwin proud. 

I’m glad that winning against the titans didn’t suddenly fix everything. It would be really great to see a possible sequel or even a one shot epilogue showcasing the political climate of the world. Since Eldia seems to be it’s own nation now, I wonder how they’re going to manage backlash and adversity from other nations. As we see with Armin and the others on the boat, it seems they want to get their story out there, but how much will that actually solve? 

I’ve seen this panel get a lot of backlash. There’s even a petition to get signatures to remove Reiner commenting on Historia’s letter. I thought that was a bit much, honestly. I think it’s done in jest, and that Reiner might be reverting back to his old self, whoever that might be. He’s obviously much more relaxed, and it looks like he’s taking care of himself now. I think this is his way of joking around and maybe even poke at Jean and tease him. He knows Jean’s going to bite back at anything he says. I did think that out of all the comedic panels we could have, going back to a crush that likely meant nothing was strange. But again, it was a crush that meant nothing, and it’s the butt of a long running joke at this point, so they’re humoring it. After this one panel, he’s back to his usual serious self, though. You can’t say much, I suppose, but i don’t see him as latching onto this or it meaning anything deeper. I’ve heard Isayama is planning on adding a few pages to the last chapter, and I wonder if he will be convinced to redo this particular panel. I can see why other’s would have an issue with this, though.

I’m happy to see that these four were together. I wonder if Onyankopon works closely with Levi. I can see him in contact with Armin, especially since the two have an interest in engineering. Seeing Levi with Gabi and Falco made my heart happy. I’d like to know how exactly Levi decided to let these two in. Again, we don’t get much from a single panel, but I personally like to assume they visit him or even stay with him sometimes and he’s become something akin to another father or uncle figure for them. Levi seems to be doing well, and it’s nice to see him able to relax. I imagine being with the two kids is revitalizing in a sense,

The last thing I wanted to mention was Mikasa’s end. She’s still mourning Eren and has seemingly secluded herself. Though I understand that she’s grieving and now that there’s no need to fight, she can do as she pleases, it’s a bit sad to see her like this. She misses him dearly, and I would assume that takes a toll on her health. Hopefully she sees the others regularly. I know others aren’t too happy about her conclusion, and I was personally underwhelmed. However, I think that she’s not stuck. She’s looking towards a future and a world that Eren sacrificed himself for. It’s a world where she can live as herself- someone who is kindhearted and peaceful. She never wanted to become an aggressive fighter, but that was the hand life dealt her. One could say Eren saved her from that fate. 

This is all just word vomit in the end. All of this to say I’m content with the ending.

[attack-on-neverland]

4. Ending the Cycle of Hatred

Eldians vs. Marleyans, Humans vs. Demons

Everything discussed so far has led back to the question “How do you stop the never ending cycle of hatred?” Both Attack on Titan and The Promised Neverland have explored the possibilities of negotiation, intimidation, violence, and full-on annihilation of those who get in the way. However, despite ending up in different paths, one hopeful message reigns clear.

The Alliance - a group made of Eldians, Marleyans, and those from other nations

In Attack on Titan, it was mentioned that conflict will always exist as long as a diverse set of people with different ideals exist in the world. Conflict is part of our world and it will never cease to exist. The only way around things to work through them, even if it is seemingly impossible. Even Eren knew that the Rumbling was an unnecessary act of violence, which was why he wanted to take the blame for himself. While it’s true that the attack on Paradis would have ensued immediately if Eren didn’t act quick enough, there were definitely other alternatives that didn’t involve purging the whole world. If the Survey Corps and the Marleyan captives were able to form some sort of truce with one another, why can’t it work with the whole world?

The conversation between Grisha Jaeger and Kruger

As Eren Kruger puts it “Love someone within the walls. Even someone on the street, it does not matter. Your wife Your child. If you can’t do it, we’re doomed to repeat it all again. The same history. The same mistakes.” This is one of the most beautiful quotes in the whole series because as cheesy as it sounds, it shows how unconditional love caan really change things around. Eren Kruger is a Marleyan (and is naturally discriminatory towards Eldians). However, he urges Grisha to love these ‘devils’ or else hate and history are bound to continue in a never-ending cycle. In the end, it does work out. He ends up loving his wife (Carla) and passes on the duty to his son (Eren). In fact, Grisha becomes one of the characters most loved by the others in the story as he took in Mikasa without hesitation, cured countless Eldians from their illnesses, and was a loyal ally to Keith Shadis. Going back to Kruger, what’s interesting is that it’s eventually revealed that Eren utilizes Paths in order to deliver that message to Grisha. Eren /did/ believe in the power of loving the other, but his desperation caused him to prioritize the lives of his friends instead.

Niccolo and Sasha

One example of the “Love someone within the walls” idea was the relationship of Niccolo and Sasha. As an avid food lover, Sasha immediately took a liking to Niccolo’s Marleyan cooking, and despite being deprived of seeing their relationship develop (in both the manga and anime), we do see glimpses of what had happened between the two. After Sasha’s death, Niccolo proclaims how Sasha had saved him from this “stupid, worthless war” and showed him that he could bring happiness through his food. Despite his prejudices towards the Eldians at first, it is evident that Niccolo changes over his time with the Scouts. Even after Sasha’s death, he keeps his ties with the other Scouts and even saves them from a potentially fatal event. He even invites Sasha’s family for a meal to honor their daughter. Here, it is evident that the cycle of hatred has been broken. However, we see the remnants of this cycle when we backtrack a little.

Gabi and Udo witnessing the death of Zofia who is crushed under the rubble

The one who killed Sasha was actually Gabi Braun, one of the younger Marleyan warrior candidates. After Eren’s destruction of the city and the Eldians coming to save him, Gabi is left in shock and distraught as she sees Edo and Zofia die before her very eyes. The young girl is suddenly exposed to the realities of war as innocent civilians are ruthlessly crushed, bombed, and murdered. If you think about it, this is actually Eldia’s counterattack for the hatred they’ve endured all these years and their seeming “banishment” from society. So this shows how the cycle continues. In the beginning, it was attacks towards other civilizations, then attacks towards Paradis, then counter attacks towards Marley, and now a little girl fighting back by killing one of Paradis’ elite soliders. The cycle was even supposed to continue right then and there if the senior Survey Corps members weren't there to stop them from killing Gabi. However, you do see how the cycle of hatred continues to manifest in Gabi as she continues to belittle Eldian civilians, calls them devils, and rejects any offer of kindness from them. This goes on and on until Gabi is saved by Sasha’s family. It was only when it dawned on her that she was saved despite killing their daughter that she realized that the Eldians are not devils, but people like her. From that moment forward, she began to cooperate with them and the vicious cycle stopped (for this group of people, at least). The selfless extension of generosity by the Braus family has touched Gabi’s heart as her hatefulness turned into understanding. AOT has shown that the cycle CAN be broken and that there was a possibility that Eren didn’t have to take those extreme measures to save the Eldians.

Sonju teaching the Gracefield kids the necessary skills they need for survival

In the Promised Neverland, the cycle of hatred for most of the Gracefield kids was broken early on due to the enthusiasm and empathy that Emma immediately extended to Sonju and Mujika. It was also relatively easier for them to break this hatred because it was the demons who rescued them out of their own volition. However, this cycle of hatred had continued to be perpetuated by the Lambda experiment kids for quite some time.

"Mass-produced" humans who never get to see the light of day

Those part of Lambda were subject to human experimentation and torture by the demons. However, it is interesting to note that while the demons are the ones acting out these abuses, they are really primarily working under the order of Peter Ratri, who is a human himself. Still, this caused Norman and the Lambda children to develop a deep-hatred for demons for treating them as mere cattle, and mercilessly torturing them to understand how to produce the best meat. Experiments of Lambda have experienced adverse side-effects which include uncontrollable headaches, coughing blood, development of disabilities, or bearing some strange human power. Apart from that, Norman saw how the “mass-produced” children were attached to tubes, had no names, and never even experienced consciousness. These cruelties caused him to hate the demons even more. While Emma was optimistic about using Mujika’s blood to stop demon regeneration (therefore ending the need to farm humans), Norman stays a realist and tells Emma that there is still no surefire way that demons will stop hunting humans until they are all exterminated. Norman reiterates demons have the utmost advantage physically as they are huge creatures that are agile and would beat humans in a race thousands of times over. Apart from that, they could also be outclassed intellectually because demons can keep eating and eating humans to boost their intelligence. As crossing to the human world was also deemed an impossible dream (at that time), Norman believed that the only way to end the cycle of hatred is to exterminate all the demons.

Eren distancing himself from his friends, Norman stylistically drawn as a child when he realizes that he was wrong to carry out the genocide attacks

Like Eren, Norman knew that this was not the right choice. This is why he also distanced himself from his friends and took up this heavy burden alone. However, he could not bear the thought of any human suffering again, and continued on with his attacks to regenerate the demon villages. In the midst of this chaos, Emma finds him and makes him realize that the demons are also capable of joy and sadness, have their own groups of children and elders, and like them were just thrown into a cruel world where the cycle of hate already exists. Emma also goes on and reassures Norman that they would be there every step of the way to help out with the reversal of the regeneration. Once again, it is Emma’s unconditional optimism and selflessness that gets to Norman and he agrees to stop the attacks in favor of finding an alternative. It can again be seen here how the cycle of hatred is broken with the one act of kindness enacted by Mujika and Sonju onto Emma, with Emma spreading this love to Norman. This is something they eventually pass down to all the humans and demons in the farms as well. This one act actually trickled down and became one of the reasons why they were able to overthrow the Ratri clan and forge a new promise that allowed both sides to live in peace.

[ghostmartyr]

SnK 128 Thoughts

Pacing, I think, is the single most difficult thing to do correctly when telling a story. Out loud or in text, you have to juggle every cue you’re giving off, keep it all relevant, and make it so when things fall into place, they’re falling to the gravity that the story’s been given.

That’s why we’ve got something of a problem in this arc.

I complain a lot, because it’s easy, and this is hardly a flawless work. Organization has also been one of the regular things this series just has trouble with.

Still, while I really feel that the last few chapters aren’t the best way to tell this story, the story chosen is a monster to keep in line.

[insert amusing pre-cut joke of your choice here]

Conflict is the root of every story. Character vs self. Character vs character. Character vs nature. Pick one, then plant the seed and watch the clash reform the setting. Knowing your protagonist often involves knowing your villain.

Eren has always been the best protagonist for this series. He embodies the fury of humanity in an environment that embraces complacency. He is the voice that shouts for people to do something.

Back in Trost, everyone on his starting squad plans on picking the Survey Corps. Because of his constant, unfettering influence. He’s the one who is always reminding them that there’s a world outside that they’re abandoning. He never lets Jean forget it. He interrupts parties with the vocal equivalent of hammering 99 problems to every door.

Eren is one of the top ten soldiers in the 104th, and he makes sure everyone knows what he’s using his skills for. And before they themselves are confronted with what’s being asked of them to join him, everyone in his social circle is ready to make the same choice.

Moving forward is what Eren does in a world that’s been trapped in stagnation. He is a force of change. He is a force of impotent rage in the face of disaster.

He is every reaction the humans inside the walls don’t have, because as a people, they can’t imagine what there is to be done about their problems. Staying within the safety of the walls and limiting their potential in return for not dying a bloody death seems fair, to them.

They are imprisoned, so Eren, our protagonist, seeks freedom.

Being born free is the linchpin of his first successful transformation.

His first rather disturbing act of violence comes from him murdering slavers.

The wings of freedom are the iconic brand of his chosen military branch.

Subtlety.

That’s all very straightforward and simple to work with.

Then we open up the setting, and things are still rather simple, just in a turn that kicks off one hell of a problem.

The world itself is a cage. Physically, in the form of internment camps, or culturally, in the form of how people think about each other and act. There is no freedom for the citizens of Paradis now that they have broken out of their shell. There is just another prison, and a ticking time bomb.

Naturally, in its most basic form, this would make the world Eren’s enemy, because Eren is the champion of freedom.

Only then, if you stick to the most basic form of the concept, the simple answer is that when everyone else dies, then you will have your freedom.

Eren might be the story’s protagonist, but that’s because he stands at the fulcrum of all the story’s core ideas. He makes the rest of the plot move. He is the focus point. He is why there’s a story, and not a jumble of confused, dying people throwing themselves at the problem of titans.

He’s not everything that’s going on.

The world’s cruelty is not what this story is about.

Eren starts thinking about the outside world because a boy shares his dreams of the ocean.

Mikasa takes the time to salute a little girl on a battlefield.

Sasha fights a titan off with a bow and arrow to save one child’s life. She dies because she won’t kill a little girl.

Levi chooses not to revive Erwin so that Erwin can die without being brutally abused as the rest of mankind’s sacrifice.

Niccolo’s entire concept of what he’s fighting for is disrupted because people like his cooking.

Gabi is protected and treated like a child by the 104th even after they know she pulled the trigger on their friend.

Colt dies because of his insistence on giving his little brother comfort.

Reiner’s still breathing because there’s a few little kids he can do some good for.

Annie just wants to see her dad again.

Humanity, as a general concept, begins in an easily condemnable place in the manga. One of the first things Paradis does is send out a large percentage of its citizens to die so that the rest can live. Meanwhile, the only people who do try to go outside and learn more about the world are smeared even as they’re bringing back corpses.

By the end of Uprising, there’s a crowd of cheering people waiting for the Scouts to succeed.

People are awful.

They can do better.

A lot of Eren’s objection to Jean is highlighted through that. He never gives Connie a hard time for wanting to join the MPs. It’s Jean, who’s vocally joining up just so he can take it easy, that Eren objects to. Jean doesn’t have to be a jackass. It’s a decision he’s making.

Jean decides to do better.

In the beginning, people are willing to settle for ‘good enough.' Slowly, as the arcs go by, we approach a near universal take of people seeing problems and taking preventative action.

Here, with the Yeagerists, we come back to the original sin of Paradis.

As long as this one little island is okay, and no one on it has to worry about death, what does the outside world matter? Especially when that outside world has repeatedly promised to kill them? Killing them all first isn’t a problem, it’s a solution.

Samuel’s there at the start of Trost.

Sasha saves his life.

Connie kills him.

They don’t hate each other. Neither one wants to pull the trigger. But Samuel is willing to see the rest of the world die if it means keeping Paradis safe. Connie isn’t.

Over and over, the cycle plays out the exact same way. People kill each other to free themselves. As long as there’s always an Us vs Them dynamic, the bloodshed continues indefinitely. The Eldian Empire enslaved the world through titans. Marley won its freedom and decided it was okay to do the same thing as long as they only enslaved Eldians.

The methodology is what’s going to fuck everyone over in the end.

During Uprising, it is routinely discussed that it’s possible the royal family and the upper brass do know something that makes a coup a bad idea. It’s possible that overthrowing them will bring Paradis into an even darker landscape.

What it comes down to is that whatever they know, they’re willing to let everyone else die if it saves their own skin.

Since that particular Everyone Else is united, the coup continues, and the island’s given its chance at actual peace.

Now, the Yeagerists are making that same argument.

Meanwhile, before we were dealing with this, we had Zeke. His argument was that seeing as the world would never change, Ymir’s people were all cursed and damned, it is for the best of all of us if we all die.

He’s the ultimate counter to Eren. Eren is fighting for life, while Zeke is only searching for the best death.

Only by all appearances, Eren’s fight has landed him in the exact same place. It’s only the question of which people are dying.

Getting back to Connie and Samuel, if you squint, Connie is betraying his allegiance to his comrades. ...If you squint. I know he feels that way, and I know what the chapter title is, but the Yeagerists are a genocidal cult who bully their way into power and try to kill off their actual Commander, who Connie is still following.

Samuel might not be aware of that, but that’s what we’ve got.

The closest Connie came to betrayal was throwing a Warrior Candidate into his mom’s mouth, and we wrapped up that subplot.

Without squinting, Samuel is betraying the ideals that Connie chose the Survey Corps for. Connie wants to save people. He doesn’t want all this death, regardless of how it benefits him.

So this whole conflict, throughout this entire chapter, is really all about who wants which people dead.

The Warriors are still fighting for Marley. Despite everything, that’s their home, and their base of operations if they ever want a chance at fixing things. Paradis has more friends on it than they like thinking about, but Paradis is not their problem.

Kiyomi and the Hizuru flock are pretty much... she is just so done, and it’s very easy to see why. This is not their war. They were looking for a beneficial partnership. For power and resources, sure, but they were willing to play ball. Now they get to watch as the nation they helped kills off the world and their only allies are rushing them to a basement. Hopefully to do something significant before their country burns.

What’s left of the Scouts who are actually following the legitimate chain of command is, surprisingly, focused on stopping Eren’s genocide.

Then I guess the rest of the world probably has opinions, but they don’t get any pages. But it’s pretty safe to assume Eren’s high on their ‘want dead’ list. If not all of Paradis.

We’ve got one group of people who are actually, actively, doing the anti-genocide thing.

The rest is just fighting over the biggest piece of the pie.

The conflict is that some people think genocide is bad, and some people think genocide is okay, actually.

And, you know, fine.

Only then we have Eren.

Protagonist boy.

We don’t know his conflict, and he has more power than anyone else in the entire cast. Unless we count the primordial ooze as a cast member. He is a giant stegosaurus monster who has threatened the entire world, and as far as anyone with eyes can see, he’s actually going through with it.

Nothing presented anywhere suggests that there is a way to stop him.

At best, if people succeed in killing him, they will have unleashed a bunch of mindless Colossals into the world. If we revisit our volume 1 knowledge, we know this to be a problem.

Making all of this really, really pointless.

Obviously, this is what all these characters would do in this situation.

Obviously, we have some feelings about them being forced to kill their allies while the world falls apart.

Obviously, the author probably being willing to fast-forward through all of this is not necessarily an indication that that is what creates the optimal story.

Obviously, these are important details.

The plot still might as well be a glacier.

There is one person moving pieces around. Everyone else is just scrambling on the board he’s created and rehashing whether or not genocide is a good thing every time they’re considering shooting someone they kind of don’t want to.

All of the tension is literally an ocean away.

As great as the character moments are, there’s nothing to ground them in. There’s just a baseless hope that somehow, there’s a way out of this, and the story doesn’t end with yet another genocide kicking off a rebellion.

Magath flips on his worst hot take immediately. He does that because his country is dying and it’s reorganizing his priorities and beliefs to line up with what he’s actually feeling instead of parroting the world that created him.

Yelena goes from being catatonic to being a nuisance because -- reasons?

Connie almost kills Falco then doesn’t, because he really, honestly, was never going to kill the kid and we all knew that.

The driving force of all these potential conflicts is just too distant. As much work as everyone’s doing, they’re only making progress towards getting to Eren.

When you have a character who can end the world choosing to end the world, it creates problems. When that character is your protagonist, it’s even worse.

In the past, Eren’s absence has spurred characters to action and revealed more of the world’s secrets. Presently, unlike in his various kidnappings, Eren is the one with the secrets. His absence is making people do stuff, but not stuff that has any tangible meaning outside of putting actions to the belief that genocide is bad.

Secrets, and people seeking answers, has been a major player in moving the plot from the beginning.

Here though, we have the issue of no one having the luxury of investigating why this is happening. Mikasa and Armin might be desperate to know, but they have no tools available to them except the airship. Which, again, just puts them in the same place as Eren. It does not give them much more than they had the last time they were in a room with him.

Whatever secrets are in place, they are insignificant next to the fact that the world is ending as they watch.

Only, you know, slowly.

Because the decision has been made that Eren’s perspective is going to be a Reveal. It has to stay private until the moment it’s relevant to the other members of the cast, or otherwise, what was the point of holding off so long?

The result is this. Too much going on in too little time, and all of it technically mattering, but not enough that spending 40 pages on it really changes how the story is progressing.

I’m not sure this is a problem that would be easy to see coming. In the design phase, I mean. I’ve kind of been cautiously whining about these concerns for several months.

But the stage is set like this: Eren pulls the doomsday trigger. Enough time must pass for Paradis to cultivate a new normal and for Eren to reach land with his squad of titans. The goal is gathering our cast and stopping Eren.

There’s a disconnect between what needs to be done and how much time it takes to portray those things.

Connie’s breakdown over feeding Falco to his mom is a character moment that helps to inform his emotions this chapter. That’s probably why it survived. It still drags four named characters off to a village in the middle of nowhere while Floch’s reign is establishing itself.

Magath’s turnabout this chapter is the culmination of a lot of the emotional connections he’s made with Eldians, and the attachment he has to his home, but it comes after driving in the point of why Marley is so fucking awful. He’s spouting rhetoric last chapter, then he’s immediately confronted with the birthplace of that rhetoric being destroyed thanks to events he’s had a part in forging.

Yelena goes from being willing to let Floch shoot her to having an interest in watching things play out. Courtesy of one background dump.

The emotional beats these characters are all due do not match up with what they have to do, and it’s making things come across as really disjointed. It’s a frustrating combination of this needing more pages, but the idea of yet more pages being spent off where the main plot actually is going on is exhausting.

The world is ending, but the world has been ending for months.

We’ve clearly got a checklist of things to get done before we meet up with Eren, but he’s hoarding the plot. Sticking around to watch the list be physically checked is...

To paraphrase some tumblr post from the past few months, it feels like laundry, mostly.

The story wouldn’t survive just jumping to Eren. The more time we’re away from him, the greater the impact when we finally know what’s up. The more time we have with our squad of unlikely, plucky heroes, the more we’re going to want to punch Eren in the face for not listening to them. Again.

It’s not that there’s no value in devoting chapters to all of this planning and reeling. It’s that no matter what happens here, it is not fixing the larger problem of Eren’s genocide campaign.

The plot is across the ocean, and we are months into watching our cast try to reconnect with it.

For me, that makes it a bit dull to read, but it is hard to hold it against the story. Writing the end of the world when you intend to make the audience care about the world -- even though the protagonist is ending it -- that is a lot of plot. Knitting it all together is not a simple task. You can see the seams popping.

Oh well.

One of the things I will stand by is that this manga is a great story told gracelessly. If you read it all linearly, problems are going to be noticed. Stuff be weird. Plus timed terribly.

But there’s a lot of emotion packed into it all. It’s a story that, when you look back in retrospect, free of any time line and observing only through the lens of your knowledge, it holds up and has power.

So I’m glad all of this stuff is being drawn, because one day, when the story’s over, having a fragmented, disjointed thread of progression isn’t going to matter so much.

Some stories survive on how they’re told.

Arguably, that includes this one, because the anime got people through the first few volumes.

This story, primarily, survives on the quality of what it is attempting to lump together.

...Not that I don’t wish it wouldn’t try a little harder to pace itself, but I suppose all that energy is being spent on Eren. You know. Since he’s the only one who has any of the parts of the plot that matter.

Uh.

As far as what actually happened this chapter, yay for Mikasa showing attachment to Kiyomi and crew. Intrigue for the question of where Eren is being such a topic (he’s a fucking giant stegosaurus last I saw figure it out). Sadness for Samuel being on the wrong side after surviving so long (Connie probably remembers Sasha saving his life). Sadness for Reiner trying to spare his friends the pain of what he went through for his cause. Pat on the head for Annie still being impossibly Annie. Pat on the head for Onyankopon just because (sorry about your life yikes).

The absolute funniest part of all of this, to me, is that Daz is now dead.

Beats freezing to death in a blizzard while two teenagers shout about philosophy over your unconscious body?

Anyway, another month goes by.

Much the way waves do in Wind Waker.