#but yeah mostly the way i know songs that aren’t officially released is

[stone-stars]

okay you talk about naddpod music all the time and i love it and i want to listen to more naddpod music!!! but there's only like two albums on spotify.. where are you listening to em? is it a patreon thing?

hi! so here’s a post i made a bit ago breaking down what music has been released! there’s a few more songs out there on the patreon than just the ones on spotify, but unfortunately most songs haven’t actually been put anywhere outside of playing in the background of the podcast.

since i made that post there are a few extra notes i can add, though!

home is where the hearth is, the new c3 lyrics song, was released after i made that post

also, some of the songs from emily’s old albums on bandcamp were later repurposed as naddpod songs. notably, from spooky grooves and groovy spooks, “mummy strip tease (sex beat)” became “stallios” and “demon strut (ambient strut)” is “the mindflayer’s lair”. (“halloween at philip glass’s house” also became “broken heart banshee”, but that one is available on the patreon already)

[thestarsanctuary]

BNHA CHARACTERS SEEING YOU DRESSED UP FOR THE FIRST TIME

definitly a random post but whatever.

Gender Neutral reader. Let me know if there are any pronouns or indicators that aren’t that!

BAKUGOU -

Bakugo was waiting for you at the formal party that UA waa having for the end of the year and in all honesty, he wanted to leave. Bad.

It wasn’t you, it could never be you, but it was all these people, and the awful music and dancing, it was too much for him without you there, and he looked like an idiot because he was just standing there making him want to leave even more. But then you came.

And wow did everything that he hated on before become so irrelevant so fast. Record time honestly, but he couldn’t help it. Here you are in this gorgeous dress, and wait...makeup? Seriously? Score, Bakugou thought of this as an absolute score. He couldn’t even respond properly when you said hi but quickly covered it with annoyance.

“I’ve been waiting for 15 minutes why’d it take you so long? And why couldn’t I come get you so I wouldn’t have to wait in this disaster.” He spat, avoiding your eyes just slightly.

“Ah, sorry Katsuki! My hair wasn’t really cooperating so it took longer than I expected...but I’m here now!” You grinned, and he couldn’t even find it in him to argue more.

You just looked so good.

“Yeah yeah alright, lets go extra the others are waiting over there.”

“Why didn’t you go over there before I came then?”

“I didn’t want to go without you.” He didn’t want to go at all at this point, he just wanted to be with you and you only.

As you two reached most of class 1-A you could see everybody so dressed up, it was a bit of a spectrum honestly, all the girls were talking amongst each other but quickly stopped when they saw that you had come and you were bombarded with compliments.

“Ahh you look so good!”

“Where did you get that dress from?! God?!”

“Literally how do you look like this and you get with Bakugou?”

“HEY EXTRA SHUT YOUR TRAP.”

“truth is truth.”

Conviniently enough one song that you absolutely adored came on and interrupted the entertaining banter going on as you dragged Katsuki onto the dance floor. Although he didn’t really move at first he slowly began to try his best and attempt to dance. Only for you would he do something so ridiculous.

You two had been dancing for who knows how long, maybe 10-20 minutes but it felt like two the way you had been smiling so wide, and been so happy to be there. It made Katsuki feel so lucky to have somebody who enjoys him as much as he does them.

After Katsuki had said he got tired and left, he saw you had went to dance with the girls and you looked so confident and happy, it made him feel so infatuated with you. If anything. Obviously he liked you, he wouldn’t date you if he didn’t, but he had never seen you look this good and act like this, it was almost tol good to be true. But it quickly ended because he was getting a bit jealous of how close the others were.

“Hey extra, let’s go sit down before you whine and complain because your feet hurt.”

“How did you even know-

“Shut up and just come with me, they have drinks.” Quickly, off you two went.

The rest of the night was plenty calm, with the exception of Denki or Mineta being their usual selves and getting caught by Aizawa numerous times.

“Katuski~” you whispered, as he looked to you with a side glare.

“What do you want.”

“Nothin’ but just wanted to say thank you for coming tonight, I loved being with you.” You had NEVER seen him this red before. People actually could’ve thought he was dying by the aggressive tone of red.

“I- thank you. I love you.” He whispered back, a bit embarrassed to say it in his usual tone, he was okay saying these things to you because he knew you felt the same. And that’s all it is.

“I love you.” You smiled and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek as he held you hand, rubbing the back of your palm.

“....can we go to your house and watch movies or somethin’ this is incredibly annoying now. All these lights and this trashy music, your house is at least a little less trashier than this.” He said louder this time, and once you had stood up he immediately led you outside only to kiss you softly.

“I love you a lot. Don’t forget it.”

TODOROKI -

You and Todoroki had agreed to meet up at the zoo for your first date, as you adored animals and Todoroki...tolerated them.

Shoto arrived first, mostly because he was a good 5 minutes early. He liked to be on time, everytime. It showed that he cared, and it also gave him time to think about how he wanted to talk and approach you, because honestly, he had no clue what he was supposed to do. He quickly texted Midoriya (like he should have done before) to help him calm himself down but right after he sent the text he looked up and saw you walking towards him and.....you looked stunning.

“Hi! How long were you waiting for me?” You asked with a hint of playfulness.

“Um, not long, maybe 5 minutes, really nothing long.” He stumbled a bit with his words, and his cheeks were kind of red, but he still managed to make you feel shy. “I like your outfit, the skirt is really nice” he said, and you laughed and did a tiny spin.

“You think? I don’t wear skirts that often to be honest with you. I only really wear the one at school.” You said and he didn’t react but simply nodded.

“You should more often. I think you look pretty in them.” Yup, there it was, and now the roles have reversed.

“Okay okay, enough of that, let’s go!” You grabbed his hand and inside you went.

Todoroki had been walking around basically just listening to you talk the whole time, and when you didn’t speak it was a comfortable silence. You hadn’t released his hand either. Not that he minded, if anything he held it a bit tighter.

However, there was one thing Todoroki was constantly doing. Looking at you. There wasn’t even a hint of embarrassment. When you two left the zoo to go get lunch whenever you looked up he was looking at you. He seemed a bit more well....affectionate? Not that he was all over you with hugs and kisses, but he insisted on holding your hand, and when driving you back home he kept complimenting you. The whole time.

“I like your hair today, it looks really good.”

“I like your shoes, where did you get them from?”

“Those socks are cool, why are they so long?” At this point you weren’t sure if he was trying to create conversation or he was generally interested but either way it was so cute to you. He even asked to take photos with you, and offered to send them to you. As if he was just going to keep them for himself.

Once you had finally reached your house he thought you were going to simply leave but you invited him inside, and obviously he wasn’t going to decline, so he went inside.

You had made him and yourself some drinks and carried them back to the living room.

“So...is there a reason you’ve been all lovey-dovey on this date? Not that I mind, I’m just curious, is this your hidden persona?” You question, giving him an adorable grin.

“Ah...no- I, I thought you looked really pretty. And you still do, you always do, but I wanted to reassure you so I thought being more affectionate would help you know that I liked you.” He stated and he looked so serious but his cheeks were so red, it was probably the cutest thing you had seen and heard from Shoto yet. So you did what any sane person would do with Shoto Todoroki in front of them. You kissed him.

It was quick, nothing extensive and definitely nothing heated, but it was effective. Because now you had Todoroki wrapped around your finger. He just looked at you, mouth agape with shock, but he wouldn’t look away. Was he even blinking?

“Sho, would you like to stay over tonight? We can watch movies and y’know, just get to know each other more.”

“Yes. Yeah I- I would like that.” Whatever you had said Shoto would probably say yes to anyways. He swore it was you and the skirt.

It was simply just you.

MIDORIYA -

Midoriya is a simple guy. Whoever he likes is going to know. So when he found out you were going to ask him out to go to the formal on Friday from Mina, he was basically panicking. What is he supposed to do? Should he wait for you or keep on with his day? When are you confessing? Should he do it first? There were too many questions in his mind. He didn’t know what to do or how to respond when you actually asked him out either.

“So, did you want to go out with me?” You had asked after school, which definitely caught Midoriya off guard because you were not off school grounds and you were definitely not in private. You were literally still in the classroom for God’s sake he could see Uraraka shaking Iida from here.

“I- um, I’m not exactly sure why you’re going with me but yeah! That would be awesome!” He said, trying to play it cool. If he thought of you like a friend he could talk to you better but he couldn’t deny his obvious feelings for you.

“I think you’re cute, and I like you anyways so I’d rather go with you. How about you pick me up at 6 on Friday yeah?” Midoriya has officially died. Inside of his head but that’s basically the same thing as the literal meaning.

“Oh yeah! I can do that! I’ll uh, see you there!” You smiled at his immediate response and kissed his cheek before giving him a quick ‘great’ and walking off with your group of squealing girls and whining boys. (Denki really tried to make a bet that you would wuss out.)

Midoriya was definitely in over his head for this.

He was basically panicking because he wasn’t sure if you even liked him the way you said you did or if you were just pranking him. It was common for that to be a thing in UA, with so many people and their superior-complexes they were bound to use it to entertain themselves. But he pushed those thoughts away because he never wanted to think of you like that again. You were too cool and too nice to be that way. At least, that’s what he hoped.

As he arrived at your house he quickly sent you a text but you opened the door a few seconds after he had sent it. And oh...OH. You looked...amazing. Midoriya is definitely blushing by now, and this is exactly what he was hoping. He finally got you, the most attractive person he’d ever seen to look his way, and thank god he had because the way you were looking had him hoping nobody could outdo him.

You were wearing a suit. But it wasn’t like Midoriya’s suit, not a simple tuxedo, but it was with this sort of, silk top and the pants were long and fit. But instead of a blazer or something you had on this long sort of coat but you looked straight out of a magazine. Especially with the heels.

There was something electric happening in this car. Whether it was Midoriya and how much he was looking at you every two seconds, or the way everytime he did you were already looking at him. You made him feel a bit incompetent with the way confidence was radiating off you.

“You look good Izu. I like the tuxedo. Sorry if what I’m wearing wasn’t what you we’re hoping for.” You had said this calmly but you weren’t looking at him, as if you were scared of his response.

“Oh!! Thank you, I actually enjoy your outfit a lot more, you look really good! So good I don’t even know why you look so good jeez...sorry!! Rambling” he said before he got to into it. He had finally pulled up to the school.

“It’s fine. Your rambling is very cute~” you said, giving him a grin. He blushed a tiny bit and took the initiative of grabbing your hand and you had strolled inside.

As you had walked up to your friend group you were surrounded by your fellow friends as they complimented you almost excessively.

“Okay okay thank you guys. Please let me get back to my date huh?” You said smoothly and the cheering began all over again, so you quickly grabbed Midoriya and left to the drink bar.

“You do look really good today though, the compliments were, very well deserved.” Izuku said as he got you both punch.

“Well I could say the same about you. Along with a bit more.” You teased as he laughed.

The night was ecstatic. You and Midoriya had danced the whole time, and there was almost no time when the two of you weren’t together, and that was only because you had promised Mina a dance as a joke and she took it very seriously. The only other time was you yelling at Bakugou for saying Izuku’s suit was ugly. You didn’t even say anything bad you just said,

“IF HIS IS UGLY THEN YOURS IS ACTUALLY HIDEOUS, SO WHAT NOW.” And apparently yelling isnt exactly accepted so you and Bakugou both had to get a tiny scolding from Aizawa but he was so bored of how stupid the conversation was and let you both go with a warning instead. So you two stayed away from each other but glares were definitely shared.

As quickly as the night began it was over. And you were back in Midoriya’s car. Except this time you were kissing. A lot.

“You looked so good today~ it was hard to not kiss you on the spot.” You mumbled on his lips.

“Same here, everybody was looking at you and I felt...kind of jealous actually.” He whispered blushing.

“Well if it’s any comfort I could only look at you. You do know that I like you right?”

“Yeah yeah I know!” Why did he sound so excited?!

“So do you like me then? I never exactly got an answer.” You said leaning back into your seat. He however, basically jumped in the car and hit his head.

“Ow! Yes yes I really do like you, I thought you could tell and that’s why you asked me?” He said and you giggled.

“Well I mean I could tell but I asked you because I liked you first. That should’ve been more obvious.” You had said with another laugh as he also laughed.

“Yeah yeah that makes a lot more since huh? Well then...are we dating then? Or do there need to be y’know dates because I understand that we should probably get to know each other more but- another kiss planted right on his lips.

“I’d like that a lot Midoriya. You really don’t have to question yourself this much, I do genuinely like you.”

“I-I know! I genuinely like you too, a lot.”

“Well then stop worrying and just kiss me again.”

Who would’ve known this is how his night would go? Well...he was not complaining. Now he had to all to himself. What a win!

El FIN

to be honest i have no clue what this is pls, but where it says heels in Midoriya’s section that can be any shoe i just find heels powerful beings.

Alright hope y’all enjoy this mess lol

-SS

[btssmutficslovingfan01]

Seducing Suga - Part 2

⮱ Summary: You were happy to find out that Yoongi likes your rap skills, and your original plan involved him, but then the unexpected happened.

Back to 🌼 PART 1 🌼 ⇖

⮱ Words: 2k

⮱ Pairing(s): Yoongi x Reader, t i n y Jungkook x reader

⮱ Genre: Smut, Angst

⮱ Warnings: Cheating, graphic depictions of sex, swearing

                                _______________________

“I’m just moving forward, no matter what happens behind me,

Even with the tears running down my cheeks I, I, I am a survivor.” You finish recording the demo as the girl group looks at you with curious wide eyes. You weren’t just singing, you were crying. The leader of your girl group, Nadi, made sure to give you a tight squeeze before patting you on the back and sending you out. It was official, you were the biggest loser of an artist the company had produced.

You’ve been crying a lot lately, and everyone knows it’s because of your idol boyfriend. Because of certain obligations, you had to come clean about your relationship to Yoongi, so that your company could take measures to help you come up with a cover story. You weren’t in a good place with him at the moment, since you hadn’t texted each other in a little over a month and you expected him to text you first.

Your company had declared you their new solo artist and you just had to work on a collaboration with BTS. This one wouldn’t feature a rapper though, you were to record vocals with Jungkook and they wanted you both there to get a sense of your sounds together. Old fashioned producers prefer it that way. 

You know you’ll have to meet Yoongi, Namjoon, or Hoseok but most likely Yoongi since he was on the list of producers for the song. You already released your first album and you were planning on dropping two singles. The first one would be the finished version of “Survivor,” the song which you just recorded a demo for, and the second one will be the song you’re working on with Jungkook.

“There you are! The girls told me you were crying? Come on honey, look over the lyrics for your new song. Jungkook himself wrote it after sitting down for five minutes. This boy has a knack for writing about feelings.” Confused, you take the sheet of lyrics from her hand and you see them handwritten in cursive english. You could tell the song was meant to be sung in Korean but for whatever reason, Jungkook decided to translate them to English.

“If there’s a love that must be true,

That would be the love I have for you.

No matter what may pull us apart,

In the end you have my heart.

P.S I hope this collab makes you feel better, I know you’ve been hurting just as bad as my brother has been.” You sigh at the note, smiling and feeling my spirits lifted higher after reading Jungkook’s neat handwriting. You thought it was sweet that he still believed in old pen and paper as his main form of communication. Obviously, he has a phone and he could’ve texted you, but he opted for the letter.

You open up your phone and send him a picture of the paper. A few minutes later he replies back, and you talk more about the collab. Then you stop talking after he tells you he has to practice. It has been a while since you sat down and talked about your life with anyone. Normally you stay away from talking about work when it comes to Yoongi, but it’s so natural with Jungkook.

You decide to sit down and start writing. “Dear Jungkook,” You start.

Your POV

The day for our first collaborative project has arrived. After sending each other letters back and forth for the past month or so, me and Jungkook were joined at the hip. So much so that Jimin pulled me aside to tell me off about my closeness with Jungkook and how it was like I was forgetting about Yoongi.

“How is it any of your business, Jimin? Me and Jungkook are friends. If Yoongi thinks there’s something more, that’s his problem. Did you know that I was heartbroken after he decided not to text me after telling me he needed a break? We haven’t even talked to each other since then. Things aren’t the same between us. I didn’t realize how much I had in common with Jungkook until after that happened. So in a way, I’m glad that me and Yoongi are no more,” As soon as I say those words, Yoongi steps out of the shadows. “Gah! Where did you come from?”

“I was having my coffee in the other room. I heard about what you said. It sounds like you and Jungkook really hit it off. I’m happy for you, really,” He sets down his mug on a coaster nearby. “So that’s why I wanted to tell you that we should break up.” I feel a pang of sadness inside but it’s nothing compared to the immense longing in my heart I have for Jungkook. The positive feelings took over the negative ones, and for the environment and mood in the studio to be good, I needed to concentrate on that.

“Okay. I agree with you. Shall we start?” I ask him as an artist would to a producer, and he nods, sitting down with a blank look on his face. This time, it really does look blank. I can’t read him as well as I used to, I suppose.

Me and Jungkook ended up spending four hours together, and after a lot of time holed up in the studio, we were a lot closer than before. Enough for him to kiss me during our 30 minute break. I returned the kiss gingerly, savoring the taste of his strawberry lip balm. This boy smells and tastes good.

“Will you please go on a date with me?” He asks after recovering from the long-winded kiss.

“Yes.” I smile in response, happy to jump back into recording with Jungkook. We even filmed a Bangtan Bomb, and it was so obvious that there was a spark between us. But the closer I got to Jungkook, the more gloomier Yoongi got. 

“And it’s time for Yoongi to hop in the booth with you. It’s the rap verse.”  I check the paper quickly, noticing that Jungkook hadn’t written a prior note about Yoongi.

“There’s a rap verse?” I ask in disbelief.

“Yeah, I added it after hearing you guys together. It didn’t sound like enough…” He dissed my singing skills right in front of me! We sit through two grueling hours of that before we’re dismissed for the day.

I grab Yoongi’s collar and I drag him towards the janitor’s closet. “How romantic. Isn’t it sweet that we have candles already here to set the mood?” I raise an eyebrow, pinning him against the wall.

“Shut up. I just wanted to be happy and I was starting to really like Jungkook. Why do you always have to ruin everything?” Seeing his blank expression soften, my heart started to race. What’s wrong with me now?

“Your lips say one thing, but your eyes say another,” He shushes me as he suddenly has me pinned to the wall, reversing our predicament so that I was in his trap again. “Maybe we should see what your body says.” Before he puts a hand on me, I stop him.

“Yoongi…” He stops midway, making sure he has my full consent before proceeding. “...Kiss me.”

We start off slow, with kisses so fiery they could melt my heart into a puddle. Yet my heart was encased again, as my body was telling me to act on impulse. The lust takes over each of us, pushing us into the wall-literally, as Yoongi’s tongue slipped into my mouth and I parted my lips so that he didn’t have to force his way in. Our tongues danced together as our lips collided in a sad, forbidden way, and we pulled apart for air after the anticipation had died down.

“You didn’t think we were stopping just there, did you?” I feel his hand circle my thigh and I warm heat shoots up my core. 

“I don’t know. Depends on what you want.” He lets his hands linger for a bit, groping me in ways that should make me feel dirty but instead I feel excited. The thrill of the moment makes me feel good.

We kiss again as he pulls off his shirt and I lose my own, our bodies filled with lust for only each other again. I haven’t felt this way about anyone in a long time.

“Shit, I’m hard. You feel that? You make me so hard, princess.” I roll my eyes at the cliche line.

“Don’t call me “princess.” I ain’t royalty. Call me by my name, kitty cat.” I allude to his nicknames from the fanbase, mostly cat-based since he resembles a cat with how tired he is whenever a camera is in his face. Little do they know that behind the scenes, Yoongi is a hard worker and that is why he is tired all the time. He barely had time for me when I was his girlfriend.

“Don’t call me kitty cat. It’s bad enough I gotta deal with crazies on a daily basis who baby me and call me lil meow meow.” I suck in a deep breath when he drops to his knees, his fingers hooking on the sides of my panties before he pulls them down. I shudder at the feeling of the cool air hitting my sensitive region at first, and I practically melt when Yoongi puts his lips on me.

I groan and buck my hips as he savors my juices, making me climax with just his lips and tongue. He smirks, burying his head further between my legs as I smother him with my clit, stroking his smooth tufts of grey locks as he kisses me to my orgasm.

“Yoongi, Oh it feels too good. Fuck yes.” I moan as he drives me over the edge, slapping my clit with his fingers before lapping up my juices. 

“That felt good, didn’t it sweetheart?” I nod, unable to speak as the aftershocks of my orgasm leave me unable to stand straight for a minute. He helps me up, lifting me to my feet since my legs forgot how to function from the crazy orgasm that Yoongi administered. “Well you’re in for a treat. Don’t worry, I’ll do all the work. Now, sit back and relax.” I nod as he makes me sit with my legs wide open in a chair and he strips down completely so that I have a great view of his giant dick and cute butt. “I’m gonna fuck you now, is that okay?” He asks as I gulp, feeling thirsty as he lowers his cock into me slowly.

“That hurts.” I groan, earning an apology from him before he turned me around and unclasped my bra so that I was fully naked as well.

“Shit, such a nice ass.” He spanks me as I bounce on his dick, moving involuntarily since he was the one slamming into me in the first place. I feel his warm hands on my ass, taking in the pleasurable feeling of his cock sliding into me with ease, as he was hard and dripping. I realize somewhere in the middle of riding his dick that we forgot to use protection.

“Yoongi, are you cumming yet?” He shakes his head, his pale cheeks flushed red as sweat drips down his forehead and our bodies cling together from the extra sweat. He looks a bit more exhausted than usual, but that’s probably because he was tasked with fucking my brains out for over an hour now.

“Shit, I’m close now. Y/N, hold me.” 

“But I-” He kisses my neck, holding my hips in place as I attempt to bounce off his lap, and before I can say anything his hot white semen has painted my inner walls. Cream drips down my inner thighs, leaking onto his stomach as I pop off his dick with an evident look of fear on my face.

“That was amazing, babe. I haven’t cum like that since—”

“I’m not on birth control, Yoongi,” And with those words he freezes, his look of pleasure replaced with fear. “That’s not all. I just cheated on Jungkook. Oh my god.” I feel my heart beating out of my chest, blood rushing to my head all at once before I pass out.

[domesticblisss]

Late Night

Timothy Thatcher x Female Reader (Mentioned Fabian Aichner x Female Reader) Rating: Mature (Minors DNI) Word Count: 1064 Warnings: Smut. It is mostly talked upon than actually acted on except for one tiny paragraph. Is it cheating if it's not an established relationship? Summary: Reader and Tim give in on their primal feelings. Inspired by Foals' song "Late Night". A/N: This was written with the power of hate and horny by my side, because; 1 - I forced myself to finish this and, 2 - this song always made me feel a certain way (this is also my favourite band lol). So I don’t know if this is any good. Also I think it would be nice to listen to it while reading, it sets the vibe.

Their relationship was an odd one. If you could call it a relationship.

They couldn’t say that they were friends exactly, acquaintances maybe. Truth is, things between them started as purely beneficial.

They met on one late night, right after Tim got signed to NXT. Marcel had decided to throw a last minute dinner party to celebrate his older friend’s achievement, and as Fabian’s… well, girlfriend wouldn’t be the exact word, but they did have something going on, and being in the apartment was an instant invite to pizza and some drinks.

Marcel's larger than life presence and his and Fabian’s constant talking and bickering was enough to distract the two european men from what was happening right in front of them.

It felt like magic. Instant attraction. Two opposite pole magnets finding each other.

She always went for the ‘in your face’ pretty ones, those that probably spent too much time staring at themselves in the mirror to care about anyone else. She couldn’t figure out what was it that made her instantly fall for him. Maybe it was his chocolate brown eyes and how it felt like they could stare into her soul or, maybe it was how passionate he was while talking about things, the way his hands moved, complimenting the words that fell out of his mouth.

The confusion wasn’t one sided.

Tim wasn’t one to easily fall for women and the few relationships he had were built slowly through the course of time, but her… she had a spell that circled around her, something in the way her lips turned into a lopsided smile when Marcel fueled Fabian’s rage in a joking manner, or how her eyes would turn to Tim while he was talking, gazing at him through her eyelashes.

They gave into their feelings a couple of months after their first encounter.

Arriving together at the bar the four of them always went together near the performance centre, they engaged in small talk, accompanied by a couple of beers, as they waited for their friends to arrive. The mood instantly changed when they got texts saying that their respective companion had bailed on them.

The air shifted right after the texts, the façade that they had been holding on for so long finally breaking.

Not even five minutes later and Tim asks her if she wants to go somewhere else quieter. They didn’t go far, their first time happened right there in his car, in the bar’s parking lot. And once again after he dropped her off at her place.

She awakened something in Tim. He was never one for one night stands or crazy encounters but she quickly changed that. It began as a once every two weeks thing. After a frustrating day at work, after a lost match, they always looked for each other in need to release bottled up feelings. Little by little it escalated. Quickies on dirty bathroom stalls of crowded bars while Marcel and Fabian waited for them or on a dark alley before one of Tim’s matches. But no matter where, how or how long, they never kept each other company after they finished. It was a ‘clothes on again and goodbye’ kind of deal. Both agreeing that they didn’t need a serious relationship, at least not right now.

Sometimes Tim felt bad for sneaking around Fabian, the italian had been anything but welcoming to him. He brings it up one day, as she is on all fours, arms propped beneath her breasts holding on to the edge of the hotel’s mattress. Tim is hitting one particular good spot, almost sending her to climax when he slows his thrusts and opens his mouth “Aren’t you afraid Fabian might find out?”

All he hears is muffled laughter slowly getting higher and higher as she lifts her head up and looks at his eyes through the mirror in front of them.

“Are you serious? You are inside of me thinking about Fabian? Tim, that man is dumb as a door and full of himself, he will only find out if we tell h– fuck right there.” she feels Tim picking up speed after her moans.

“Well, but he’s nice. I feel kinda bad for him.”

“Tim, one: I’m not even his official girlfriend; and two: if it makes you feel better, he goes out with different girls all of the time. Now are you making me cum or what?”

“Yes ma’am.”

He never mentioned or thought about Fabian after that night.

What they have is raw. It is pure want. Two adults looking to give in into their deepest desires.

Tim’s time away from competition – three long weeks – made him crave her and the comfort she provided even more. Texts between them became more frequent, her visits were practically nightly ones. Tim was borderline needy and she thrived on feeling wanted in a way she never was before.

They started noticing there was something different about their feelings towards the other, but always brushed off and blamed the hormones and whatever was going on at the moment.

It finally happened on a late friday night. Tim had given her three of the strongest orgasms she ever had and sitting on his bed, a sheer sheet covering his waist, with his breathing still a little off as he watched her make her ‘get dressed and go’ routine.

“You arrived a bit late today.” he began, feeling awkward for trying to strike a conversation.

“Yeah, Fabian noticed we hadn’t seen each other for almost two weeks and started complaining so he took me out on a date.” she let out a snarky laugh by the end.

“Did you guys fuck?” Tim blurted without thinking.

She laughed at his question, knowing how out of pocket it was for him to ask these kinds of things, but she knew how this had something to do in how his demeanour had changed whenever Fabian was mentioned or when some other man tried to hit on her. She turned to meet his eyes as she secured her bra clasp, finally answering him. “Yes.”

He didn’t miss a beat, asking “Did you cum?”

“No.”

She took longer than usual to finish getting dressed, something inside her telling that this night was different, telling her to wait. As she finished buttoning her pants, Tim spoke again.

“Stay with me.”

→

[secondhandnewsradio]

SHN INTERVIEW: Sleep Walking Animals

by Claire Silverman

photo: Ryan Hall

Sleep Walking Animals, the indie-folk alternative rock band from Manchester, England, have just released their self-titled debut EP. Since SHN first interviewed the band at the start of the year, they have released two more singles, started playing live shows again as restrictions opened up, and have announced a co-headlining tour around the UK in October. At their EP launch gig at the Fiddler’s Elbow in Camden on the 20th of September, they performed their new music to a sold out crowd.

CS: Congrats on the EP coming out. When we spoke back in February, you mentioned your plans for the EP, so it’s very exciting that it’s here now. How are you all feeling?

Tom: Like it's about time.

Jack: “Angus’ Fool.” “Wild Folk,” and “Dance Laura Dance” are on the EP, so we started recording this EP in October 2019. So it's been a big process, and the EP is kind of about that process.

Tom: We didn't want to release things until we were happy with everything, because we did record enough songs back in 2019 to go on an EP. But in post [production], we were a little bit concerned that they weren't all up to the standard that we wanted. It was our first time in a studio together as well when we recorded those songs, so we needed to practice, we needed to get together more and get more experienced in the studio. Then we ended up going up to Stockport and using a studio called Green Velvet Studios and we laid down five tracks, three of which are on the EP.

Jack: So, yes, excited.

photo: Ryan Hall

CS: Is there an overarching theme across the EP?

Tom: It feels like it's very much about things that have happened to us in the time it took to put the EP together, and things that have inspired us enough to write about, you know, various introductions to people, to new experiences, illnesses, life events that sparked something within us to try to make a good song out of.

Jack: The whole EP spans across when we started the band in 2018 right up to now, so a lot of the songs are about growth and change. But the songs are about our growth musically as well, which is a nice kind of coincidence.

Tom: “Angus’ Fool” was the first song we ever wrote together, so the EP spans from our first song together to things we were writing in lockdown. So like Jack said it’s a span of two and a half years.

Alex: “Native” was written after we played Farm Fest [this summer].

CS: So now that you have more music out and have started to establish your sound, how did you figure out what genre of music you wanted to make?

Alex: It's funny, you just mentioned “Native” and I think that was the point that pushed us to fatten up the sound a little bit. I mean, the style of the song made us realize that we can push it a little bit more. And we have a few like one recorded songs, which are definitely a lot more rock-y.

Tom: We're inspired by all sorts of different bands as well. And, you hear it said a lot but a lot of great artists steal from other great artists and that's how they become great, so we're taking influences from people that we all listen to. So this is why it's hard whenever anybody asks “so what kind of genre of music do you play?” I can never really answer that because it’s changing all the time.

Jack: But I was saying to Bill the other day, (he's not officially in the band yet but he kind of is. He's the drummer who played with us on Monday) we've never really spoken about what genre we want to write. We didn't speak about influences, particularly.

Tom: We're just going with ideas. We all have our own little pockets of interest that we bring to the table and I think that’s what makes out sound quite unique

Alex: When someone brings something and then all of a sudden there's so many layers on top of it, which are coming from all kinds of different directions. And it's just hard to put your finger on what it actually is. But it's cool and we like it.

photo: Ryan Hall

CS: It seems as though COVID restrictions are kind of mostly lifted here in England. At least, concerts are happening again. What's that been like, through the pandemic till now, and being able to play live shows again?

Tom: It’s been a massive relief, really, it means that we can get out there and get some gigging experience, start playing our stuff live. It's a completely different beast to be in the studio, it’s a completely different skill to have. And the more we do it, the more we’ll improve, and the more people will respond well to our gigs. There is such a massive impact from a live gig that you don't get from sitting down and putting your headphones in and listening to the Spotify track. You get the performance, you get the live engagement with music, and with the people on stage. That's just palpable.

CS: Since you're all performers, you're all actors, how do you think your other stage experience impacts your music?

Jack: That's an interesting one. Because I think the three of us are definitely coming out of acting and want to follow music, solely. Obviously, Tom, you both really well. [Laughter] And Nuwan’s also still following both. It's just something that when we are playing live, and it's going well, and there aren’t any technical issues, that we can just give ourselves completely to that moment. And I think that's easier for someone who has trained to do that, which is kind of what we did at drama school, I guess, to give yourself to the moment,

Tom: Yeah, there are great artists and performers, actors, musicians who haven't haven't gone through a formal training process. I think it's actually more important than training. Personally, I find the two things very different, being onstage as a member of Sleep Walking Animals and being on stage or on screen and being an actor in a role. I think the only similarity for me really, is the fact that when we go on stage as Sleep Walking Animals, I feel myself put on a character. I'm not Tom, I’m whatever else that is.

Jack: John. [Laughter]

Tom: I think we all do that whether we realize it or not. Because we'd be crippled with anxiety and insecurity and all the other horrid things that sort of flood into you when you're onstage performing in any way, you know, those don't happen or they sort of diminish if you put on that guise. So I guess that helps in that sort of transition.

photo: Claire Silverman

CS: You mentioned Farm Fest a bit earlier. What was it and how did it come about? And how was it?

Tom: So Farm Fest is a new, upstart festival that myself and my girlfriend Lottie host and organized. It's on her childhood farm and it's something that Lottie had wanted to do for a long time, to use that land to provide a space for a festival, entertainment, camping. We started it a couple years ago. There was that little bit of time between lockdowns where we got a weird freedom in the summer of 2020 and people felt like it had kind of gone away. Luckily, we all collectively know a bunch of musicians and comedians. It started small and then this year, we did it again. We charged a bit more money for tickets, and we are getting bigger and better. It feels like it's sort of gaining a bit of momentum. And it was the highlight of our year, we got to perform on a mainstage with a great sound set up. For us it was a big crowd to play to who all knew the songs and were singing along. It felt like a real festival, right.

CS: You guys are pretty active on social media, at least on the Sleep Walking Animals account. You guys don't always take things super seriously, which I like. What’s your approach to using social media? What do you think of it?

Jack: I wish we didn't have to. I think we probably all do realize the importance of it because Instagram is pretty much the only way of promoting anything, which is so fucking sad. Yeah. And I thought today, because Joe and I are reading a book about Joy Division and the start of the punk scene stuff, and they didn't even have t-shirts, because they wanted to stick it to the man and that kind of thing. But you just can't do that now. It's just like times have changed and there’s so many bands and so many artists that you have to be on it. Like, it will only be a matter of time before we go on to TikTok.

Tom: As an unsigned band without management or label yet, you know, we're left to do it on our own. Like Jack said, it's our only way of letting people know about our music. We might as well try and enjoy it if we've got to do it.

photo: Ryan Hall

CS: Now that the EP is out, what are your future plans for the band?

Tom: World domination?

Joe: Recording.

Tom: Yeah, more tunes. We've got quite a few unrecorded ones. Keep doing what we're doing, really, following the footsteps of the people and bands and artists who have inspired us. Just keep going with it and see what happens. We're not putting immense amounts of pressure on ourselves. We do it because we love it. We do it because we think our music is worth pursuing. Yeah. Just see where the wind takes us.

CS: And you've got a tour coming up in October.

Jack: Yeah, a UK tour. It’s a co-headlining tour with Polary and My Pet Fauxes. So we're playing in different cities and we're all sharing the headlines slot and supporting each other at the different venues.

Tom: The 17th of October we're playing Leeds at Oporto, then on the 18th at Dublin Castle in London, the 19th we’re in Bristol at Crofters Rights and then the 20th at Night & Day in Manchester.

CS: Good luck for those shows and again, congratulations on releasing your debut EP.

This interview has been lightly edited for clarity and length.

Listen to Sleep Walking Animals’ debut EP here

Follow the band on Instagram Twitter Spotify YouTube 

sleepwalkinganimals.com

[coolgreatwebsite]

Cool Games I Finished In 2020 (In No Real Order)

Oh, hey! Right! I have a website! I’m like a week late on writing this, but what’s a week on top of an entire year of not writing, right? 2020 was... well, we all know what 2020 was. For me personally, it was simultaneously the best and worst year of my life. The worst in both ways you can probably assume and ways you definitely can’t (neither of which I’ll be getting into), and the best in ways I absolutely never would have guessed. That uncertain job I mentioned last year got very suddenly much more certain, at a much bigger company, for a much larger amount of money. That allowed me to get my own place, making my weird living situation much less weird. Still haven’t gotten the majority of my belongings off of the east coast, but if the entire world wasn’t currently fucked up by a global pandemic I’d have sorted all that out too. What I’m saying is that, for the third year in a row, my life has been a complete whirlwind that has left me very little time to get comfortable with any aspect of it. But I did manage to play more video games than I did last year! Which is perfect, because it’s once again time for another one of these. Here’s a bunch of cool games I experienced for the first time in 2020.

Astro’s Playroom (PlayStation 5, 2020)

My one word description of Astro's Playroom is "delightful". It's just an absolute goddamn delight. A total surprise too! Included with every PlayStation 5, Astro's Playroom is, in my opinion, one of the best pack-in games of all time.

First off, it's an incredible tech demo for the PS5's new DualSense controller. It was easy to brush off Sony's talk about the controller's haptic feedback and triggers as some Nintendo-style HD Rumble bullshit, but it really is incredibly cool once you get your hands on it. The game is obviously more than a tech demo though, or else it wouldn't be on here. It also just so happens to be an extremely solid and fun platformer on top of that. Astro controls exceptionally well and the levels are all well-designed and fun, even the gimmick vehicle ones designed to show off different features of the controller. It also has an oddly compelling speedrun mode, made all the more compelling by the PS5 notifying you when your friends beat your times and the ability to load into it within two seconds from anywhere on the console. But the biggest thing for me and, call me a mark, because I am, is that the game is an honestly incredible love letter to PlayStation history.

For the first time ever, Sony has pulled off a nostalgia piece without it ending up as embarrassing garbage in the vein of PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale. There's a Nintendo-like joyful reverence for all things PlayStation oozing out of every single corner of this game. There are so many nods and references and gags for literally every PlayStation thing of note throughout the the last 25 years, and then on top of that there's a whole heap more for the things that AREN'T of note that only hyperdorks like me would get! A sly reference to the ill-fated boomerang controller? Yep. A goof on the fat PS3's Spider-Man font? You betcha. A trophy you can earn by repeatedly punching a Sony Interactive Entertainment sign until it breaks and reveals the Sony Computer Entertainment sign it was slapped on top of? Yeah buddy. It's deep cuts all the way down, even up until the final boss which had me grinning like a total dipshit the entire time. The game is endlessly, effortlessly charming.

Animal Crossing: New Horizons (Nintendo Switch, 2020)

Animal Crossing: New Horizons was the perfect game at the perfect time. That doesn't mean it's a perfect game, I actually have some issues with it, but it could not have released at a better time than when it did. It came out at the very very beginning of everyone going into lockdown due to the pandemic, and it was the biggest game in the world for a couple of months as a result. I played like 300 hours and that pales in comparison to the amount of time many others put into it.

Animal Crossing: New Horizons is the most different Animal Crossing game there's ever been, and I'm of two minds on it. Like, I loved the game, I played a ton of it, but it's lacking so much of the stuff that made me love Animal Crossing in the first place. The series has been slowly trending in this direction for a bit now, but it's not really a game that happens around you anymore. It's all about total player control. You select where everything goes, you customize every detail of everything to your liking, hell, you can even terraform the landmass to be exactly what you want. Your neighbors take a backseat in focus and end up as little more than decorations with limited dialogue and next to no quests associated with them. Series staples like Gyroids are missing in action. Facilities and services that have been around since Wild World aren't implemented. It's similar to past Animal Crossing games in a lot of ways, but on the whole it feels like a different thing.

But like I said, two minds. New Horizons strays from what I truly want from an Animal Crossing game, but I can't deny that the game as it is is a hell of a lot of fun. There's SO much you can do and SO many options, it's super addictive. Plus it implemented my long-requested feature of letting you effortlessly send mail to friends online! Too bad the actual online play is as cumbersome as ever.

In conclusion, Animal Crossing: New Horizons is a land of contrasts. I'm kidding. It's good, but definitely missing something in a way where I can understand some people being disappointed in it. I had a ton of fun though, and I'm probably going to get back into it later in 2021.

Trials of Mana (Nintendo Switch, 2019)

Late in 2019, with the physical release of Collection of Mana for the Switch, I decided I was going to play through each game on it for the first time and finally find out what this whole Mana thing was about. I went into Final Fantasy Adventure (the first game in the Mana series, because every RPG had to be Final Fantasy back then) with zero expectations and found a totally serviceable little Zelda-like with light RPG elements. I enjoyed my time with it. I went into Secret of Mana with the expectation of it being a beloved classic and found the worst game I beat that year, hands down. That game fucking sucks. I get why it made an impression on people at the time, but it's just so so SO awful to play. Needless to say I was pretty disappointed. Honestly, I would have been disappointed even if I hadn't heard it was one of "the best games" for so long. It would have been a disappointing follow-up to Final Fantasy Adventure, a game that in and of itself isn't anything incredible. Secret of Mana is just that rotten.

I braced myself for more disappointment when (after a much needed vacation from the series) I started up Trials of Mana. This game had a reputation too, as a long-lost classic that never made it stateside. One of the best games on the Super Nintendo, criminally never released for western audiences! Like Secret of Mana before it, I'd heard nothing but effusive praise. Unlike Secret of Mana, however, I was very pleased to find out that Trials of Mana mostly lives up to the hype. From a gameplay standpoint, Trials is an improvement on Secret in almost every single way. It's not perfect. The menus are still kinda clunky, animations for things like magic and items are still frequently disruptive. But the main thing is it actually plays like a sensible video game designed by humans with brains. Attacking is responsive! Hitboxes aren't complete nonsense! You don't constantly get stunlocked to death! There are more answers to combat than casting the same spell for five straight minutes to kill your enemies before they get a chance to move! It's great!

On top of being an enjoyable video game to actually play, the presentation is top notch. Secret of Mana could be a pretty game with decent music in some spots, but Trials is consistently gorgeous and the soundtrack is across the board great instead of randomly having songs that sound like clown vomit. And while Trials of Mana doesn't have the deepest story in the world, it manages to avoid being completely paper-thin like Secret. The story actually kind of has a reason for being a bit straightforward, and the reason is that it has a really cool system where you pick your three playable characters from a pool of six. Each character has their own goals and storyline, some of which line up with other potential party members, some of which don't, and you'll even run into the characters you didn't choose as NPCs along the way. This and the relatively brisk pace of the game make it highly replayable.

I'm really glad that Trials of Mana made it over here in an official capacity, even if it was like 25 years late. It's as good as I expected Secret of Mana to be and singlehandedly saved my interest in seeing any more of the series. I'm aware the quality of what came after is very spotty, but I'll get to the rest eventually!

Final Fantasy VII Remake (PlayStation 4, 2020)

They (almost) did it. They (basically) pulled it off. They remade (a chunk of) Final Fantasy VII and (for the most part) didn't fuck it up. Ok, funny parentheticals aside, Final Fantasy VII Remake is astoundingly good coming off of over two decades of just absolutely dreadful post-FF7 sequels, side games, and movies.

Final Fantasy VII has been historically misremembered as this kind of miserable, angsty, brooding thing, both by fans and by the company that made it. FF7-branded media after FF7 itself is a minefield of changed personalities, embarrassing original characters, and monumentally lame stories. Final Fantasy VII Remake is the first post-FF7 anything that actually remembers the characters, setting, and plot of Final Fantasy VII and what made them memorable and special to people in the first place. Which isn't to say it's a slavish recreation! There's a ton of changes and additions, and I actually like almost all of them! Except for some really big stuff I'll touch on in a bit!

The combat in Final Fantasy VII Remake is great. I was super skeptical about it when the game was first announced, but they actually managed to make the blend of real-time action and turn-based RPG menuing fun and engaging. The characters all play super differently from each other too, which is a huge and welcome difference from the original game. The Materia system fits like a glove in this revamped combat system as well. The remixed music is good as hell, and the visuals are beautiful (outside of a couple of very specific spots that I'm kinda of surprised they haven't fixed in a patch yet). It's a well-executed package all around.

But alas, as always, there are negatives. For starters, this is only part one of the overall Final Fantasy VII Remake project. It goes up to the party leaving Midgar which, as you may or may not recall, is the first six hours of the original game. They compensated for this by fleshing the hell out of the Midgar section the game, ballooning the overall playtime to total of about 30-ish hours. The game feeling padded is a common complaint but for what it's worth, I didn't really feel it until the unnecessarily long final dungeon, There's also the previously mentioned and funny parenthetical'd changes and additions I don't like.

This is big time spoilers for this game so if you don't want that jump ahead to the next game on the list. The Whispers suck ass. Final Fantasy VII Remake should have been brave enough to be different without having to constantly derail everything in the most ham-fisted and intrusive way possible. You can have Jessie twist her ankle without making a spooky plot ghost trip her. I don't want to fight the physical manifestation of the game everyone thought they were getting as an end boss. If you're not doing a straight remake, that's fine, but have the fucking guts to stand by your artistic decisions without feeling the need to invent the lamest deus ex machina I've ever fucking seen. The last couple of hours of this game are 100% about the Whispers and are awful for it. It's a true testament to the strength of the rest of Final Fantasy VII Remake that this aspect didn't completely sour me on it. I can only hope that they stay dead and gone for good in the games yet to come and the remake can be different while standing on its own two feet.

I truly cannot wait for the next entry in the Final Fantasy VII Remake project. I'm excited for Final Fantasy VII in a way I haven't been since the late 90s. I have a bit of trepidation that they could royally screw it up. I mean, they already got kinda close, as I said in my last paragraph. But they got so much right in this entry that, for the first time in decades, I'm willing to believe in Square Enix when it comes to Final Fantasy VII.

13 Sentinels: Aegis Rim (PlayStation 4, 2020)

My one word description of 13 Sentinels is "fucking crazy". I realize that's two words, but shut up. A bizarre hybrid of visual novel, adventure game, and strategy RPG, 13 Sentinels not only makes that work, but makes it work incredibly well. 

The story is fucking bonkers. It's told entirely non-linearly and is purposefully dense and confusing, but it does an amazing job of hooking you with a cast of likable characters and some impressively well-paced twists, made all the more impressive by the fact that you can tackle the story in basically whatever order you want. I'll say it again for those in the back, the story is Fucking Bonkers. Wherever you think it's going, it's not going. Where it is going is PLACES. Seriously, if you want a wild goddamn ride, this is the game for you. The presentation is also stunning. It's a drop dead gorgeous game with a really nice soundtrack. Easily Vanillaware's best looking game, which is saying something seeing as looking good is Vanillaware's whole deal.

If I had to levy one criticism against the game, it's that the strategy RPG portion is just kind of ok. It's enjoyable enough, it doesn't get in the way and there's not too much of it, but once it starts introducing armored versions of previous enemy types it's kind of done doing anything different. It is really good at getting people to out themselves as having no idea what tower defense is as a genre though!

Hyrule Warriors: Definitive Edition (Nintendo Switch, 2018)

I haven't really historically been a "Musou Guy". Not to say I've actively disliked them, they're just not something I've seeked out very often or played very much of. Hyrule Warriors: Definitive Edition kinda turned me into a "Musou Guy" a little bit? It's good, surprisingly-less-mindless-than-you'd-think fun.

I actually super don't care about the Zelda branding. I think all the fanservice stuff is meh at best. What I do care about is that there's a ton of character variety and a metric shitload of content. There's so many different characters and weapons for those characters that all play differently from one another and SOOOOOO many levels to play. Like the story mode is, again, kinda meh, the real meat of the game is the Adventure mode and there's a ton of it. It's 8 different world maps, each based off a different Zelda game, with each square of the map containing a little mini-scenario with unique objectives and rewards. There has to be at least 1000 scenarios between all the maps. There's so much. And that's not even getting into some of the other side stuff like the challenge modes and the fairy raising. It's a crazy amount of game in this game.

And again, it's not as mindless as it'd seem. It's not really a game ABOUT destroying 5000 guys, it's an area control and resource management game where the 5000 guys are one of those resources. Knowing who to send where and when to fight who is way more important than pressing the XXX YYY XXX YYY on the more than one million troops.

I'd say that if you're even cursorily potentially maybe interested in a musou game, this is the one to try. And if you like it, it could literally be your forever game. A sequel came out recently too, and I'm looking forward to trying that out soon.

Phantasy Star Online 2 (Xbox One, 2020)

Phantasy Star Online 2 finally came stateside in the year 2020, eight years after its initial Japanese release and initial American cancellation. It's no Phantasy Star Online 1, but it is a really fun game in its own right provided you can find the willpower to break through its clunkiness and eight years of confusing poorly tutorialized free-to-play MMO cruft.

The main thing going for PSO2, and this is a major improvement from PSO1, is that the act of engaging in its combat is fun. The combat is just feels really really good. There's a bunch of different weapon types and classes, and once you find the ones that really click with you you're in for a good time, whether you're izuna dropping dudes with wire claws or literally doing air juggles and rainstorm from Devil May Cry with the dual machine guns.

The other stuff around that combat is weird. I generally like it, but it's weird. The story mode is one of the most bizarrely presented things I've ever seen. It apparently used to be something you'd seek out in the levels themselves, but presently it's just a list of scenes you pick from a menu and watch with next to no context until it makes you fight a boss sometimes. There's some weird moments in there that MIGHT have been cool if it were presented in literally any other way?

The systems and presentation are also way more... I dunno, pinball? Pachislot? In very stark contrast to how chill original Phantasy Star Online was, everything in PSO2 is designed in a way to maximize that flashy light bing bing wahoo you got ~*~RARE DROP CHANCE UP~*~  feeling. Which isn't to say I don't like flashy light bing bing wahoo, but it's a weird different thing.

Was it worth the wait? Yeah, sure! For me! This is another one that I played like 300 hours of! I haven't even seen half of it, I fell off right before Episode 4 released because it coincided with my move! I'm gonna go back and see all that shit! PSO2's fun! A different flavor of fun than the original, sure, but fun all the same. Another one that I'm glad finally made it over here.

Riichi Mahjong (A Table, 1924)

Holy shit I fucking did it I finally learned how to play Mahjong and it rules.

It started when I picked up Clubhouse Games for the Switch. I saw that it had Riichi Mahjong and something in my brain snapped. For whatever reason, I decided that this was the time I was going to rip the band-aid off and figure this shit out. It wasn't too dissimilar to the first time I decided to try eggs, but that's a different and much stupider story for a different time. I did the tutorial in Clubhouse Games, looked up some more basics and advice because the tutorial wasn't super amazing, and I kept playing while being aided by the game's nice helper features like the button that pulls up recommended hands. I kept playing and... sorta got it. I learned the basic rules, but none of the strategy. And then I stopped playing for a few months.

In that few months, for whatever reason, a decent amount of people I know had their brains snap the same way? Like a more-than-two amount of people I'm either friends with or following online also decided to learn Mahjong. I decided to get back on the horse and downloaded Mahjong Soul and I don't know whether it was perseverance or the power of anime babes, but this time I got it. I still refer to a sheet with all the hands and whether they work open or closed, and I'm by no means a master player, but I actually honest to god understand what I'm doing and it's an incredible feeling.

Mahjong has such a huge amount of what I like to call "Get That Ass" energy. It is the energy you feel when you get someone's ass. In Mahjong you are either constantly getting someone's ass or getting your ass gotten. Someone puts down the wrong tile and you fucking GET THEIR ASS DUDE! They're got!! They're a fucking idiot that put down the wrong thing and now you have their points!!! Or you draw what you need yourself and you're a brain genius all according to plan and everyone gives you points because you're so wise!!!! It's great!!!!!

Mahjong has long been one of those games where I'd say "I'll learn this someday" and never reeeeally actually try to learn, and I'm so glad I finally took the effort to because it's good as hell. And, truth be told, it wasn't THAT hard to learn? Like you can get to the point where I was where I didn't know the strategy fairly easily in my opinion, and once you do that It's just a matter of continuing to play to understand the rest. I highly recommended that you also go out and learn it if you similarly revel in getting that ass, it's so satisfying once you do.

Yakuza: Like a Dragon (PlayStation 4, 2020)

Ryu Ga Gotoku Studio took a big gamble with Yakuza: Like a Dragon. After seven games (more if you take spinoffs and remakes into consideration) they decided to focus on a new main character and, even more unexpectedly, they decided to change things up by turning the series into a turn-based JRPG. Their gamble paid off in spades. This is easily in my top 3 favorite Yakuza games.

The JRPG gameplay is surprisingly solid. There's definite room for improvement, but they nailed a bunch of it right out of the gate. Some mechanics are a little janky and I wish the job system was more fleshed out or just worked more like Final Fantasy V's, but they nailed one of the most important things and made the battles brisk and fun. It's a great foundation, especially for a team that's never attempted anything like this, and it's way more fun than the combat's been in any of the previous Dragon Engine games. I can't wait to see them iterate on it.

Everything else is top fuckin' notch. The music is great, the side content is fully fleshed out in a way it hasn't been since before they switched to the Dragon Engine, and I love the characters and story so much. Yakuza has a new main character in Ichiban Kasuga, and he's my son and I love him. Kiryu was great, and I love him too, but he was a bit of a passive protagonist. Stuff happened around him and he mostly just stoically reacted to it. Ichi is a much more active lead and it's great. He's a big lovable dope, and his tendency to keep an upbeat attitude and eagerness to leap into action is such a breath of fresh air. And it's not only Ichiban, since this is an RPG you have a whole party of characters and they're all great! Having them with you at all times bantering with each other and reacting to things is another great change of narrative pace, too. 

Yakuza: Like a Dragon just straight up rules. As someone who has historically not been too much of a fan of the Dragon Engine games, it's simultaneously a refreshing new take on the series and a fantastic return to form. I can't wait for what comes next. Wherever Ichiban goes, I go.

Moon: Remix RPG Adventure (Nintendo Switch, 2020)

After 23 years of Japanese PS1 exclusivity, Moon: Remix RPG Adventure finally got an English release this year for Nintendo Switch. I'm glad it did, because Moon isn't just the very definition of A Sebmal Game. It's the Sebmal Game missing link. In addition to being just a great video game, it helped me make a mental throughline for a bunch of games I love and a large part of my taste in video games.

To keep a long story short (seriously, I have a much much longer version of this saved in my drafts that I'll maybe finish someday), Moon turned out to be not the JRPG I assumed it was, given the title and basic story pitch, but a secret prequel to a game I love named Chulip. Moon's developer, Love-de-Lic, was formed by a handful of ex-Squaresoft employees, many of which worked on an extremely formative game I love named Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars. Love-de-Lic broke up in the year 2000 and its staff went on to form a bunch of different studios that ended up making a BUNCH of different games I love like Chibi-Robo, Freshly-Picked Tingle's Rosy Rupeeland, Dandy Dungeon, and the aforementioned Chulip. These games, when you make the connection and line them up, all have a very distinct weirdness in common that makes perfect sense once you've realized many of the same people worked on them. Figuring this all out felt like snapping a piece of my brain back in place, and it was really crazy to come to understand exactly how much this studio that formed and disbanded decades before I'd even heard of them had impacted my tastes and, hell, my life.

So what is Moon, for those who don't innately understand what I mean by "a secret prequel to Chulip"? Moon is an adventure game where you explore a world with a day/night cycle, learn about that world's inhabitants, and eventually solve their problems. Think of it kind of like The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask, but if the sidequests were the entirety of the focus with no Groundhog Day time reset mechanic and none of the Zelda stuff like combat and dungeons. You play as a young boy who, after a late night JRPG binge session, is sucked into the world of the game he was just playing. Everything is off from the way it was portrayed while the boy was playing the game, though. The hero he had previously controlled is actually a silent menace, raiding peoples' houses for treasure and slaughtering every innocent animal that crosses his path in an endless quest for EXP. The townspeople seem more concerned with problems in their day-to-day lives than the supposed world threatening crisis outlined in the game's intro. It's up to you as the boy to investigate this world's mysteries, help the townsfolk, mend the damage the hero has done, and eventually restore love to a loveless world.

Speaking of love, I fucking loved Moon. I loved the story, I loved the characters, I loved the music, I loved the way it looks (even though the Switch port is a little crusty in that basic emulator-y kinda way), I loved how constantly bizarre and surprising and funny it was. Like I said earlier, it's the very definition of a game made for me. It was essentially the progenitor of a long line of games made for me, and of games potentially made for me but I don't know yet because I haven't played them due to not understanding Japanese (UFO: A Day in the Life translation next please? Anyone from Onion Games reading this??). For as similar as Moon and Chulip are in their systems and pacing, I think I might actually like Moon better despite it coming earlier? It's not as full force maximum impact absurd as Chulip is, but it is a lot more playable and less obtuse once you get a grip on the time limit mechanic. You don't need a full strategy guide included in the instruction manual for Moon, and you don't need to exchange business cards with every single character to get information vital to finishing the game either.

I truly cannot recommend Moon enough if your taste in games ventures anywhere off the beaten path. Maybe this is a little conceited of me, but I assume if you're reading this article, let alone this far down into it, you relate to my video game opinions at least a little bit? You should play Moon. Everyone reading this sentence should play Moon. Moon: Remix RPG Adventure is my game of the year for the year 2020.

These games were also cool, I just had less to say about them:

Death Stranding (PlayStation 4, 2019): Death Stranding, much like Metal Gear Solid V, was a game I enjoyed for the gameplay and not much else. The story, characters, and writing were a huge disappointment for me, but man if I didn't enjoy lugging those boxes around and setting up my hellish cross-continental goon summer camp lookin' zipline network. Mr. Driller Drill Land (Nintendo Switch, 2020): I am a known Mr. Driller Enjoyer, and I enjoyed this Mr. Driller. Originally released for the Gamecube, Mr. Driller Drill Land is another long-time Japanese exclusive that finally came stateside this year and it's packed with new and novel twists on the Mr. Driller format. It looks super sharp, the music's great (also the credits music is the most impossibly out of place and extra as hell shit in the world and it's hilarious), and it's just a good ass time. The main campaign is pretty damn short, but if you're a post-game content kinda guy it has that and it's all super hard. Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 1+2 (PlayStation 4, 2020): They finally made another good new Tony Hawk game, and all it took was perfectly remaking two of the best old Tony Hawk games! Plays exactly like you remember it with the added benefit of the best mechanics from up to THUG1, looks great, packed full of content, even has most of the music alongside some mostly crappy new stuff. It's the full package as is, but I do hope they end up adding THPS3 to it eventually. Mad Rat Dead (Nintendo Switch, 2020): Mad Rat Dead was a pleasant surprise that I only picked up because I saw a couple of people on my Twitter timeline constantly talking about it. A fun and inventive platformer where all your actions need to be on beat with the music. The gameplay feels great (aside from some not so great performance issues on Switch), the soundtrack is fun, and it's got a real good style to it. Demon's Souls (PlayStation 5, 2020): I love Demon's Souls and this is Demon's Souls. It plays exactly the same with some minor quality of life changes. I don't agree with many of the artistic changes, but there's no denying it looks incredible on a technical level. If you want to play Demon's Souls again or for the first time, this is a perfectly valid and fun way to do so. Groove Coaster: Wai Wai Party!!!! (Nintendo Switch, 2019): Groove Coaster is one of my favorite rhythm games, and they finally made an acceptable at-home version with Wai Wai Party. It's not a perfect replication of the arcade game control-wise, I have some issues with the song choices, and the pricing is frankly fucking ridiculous if you're not a Groove Coaster maniac like I am, but the same ultra satisfying gameplay is all there. You can even play it vertically in handheld mode! Flip Griiiiiiiip!

And we're done! Phew! Honestly didn't realize I played that many good games until I typed all this out. Thanks as always for reading this far. I'm gonna try and get back to regularly posting Breviews this year at the very least. Honestly don't know if I'll get anything else up on here, but we'll see. Here's to hoping 2021 is a little bit less of a nightmare!

[fmdjaeyeol]

word counts: 274 + 260 + 276 + 320 + 251 + 261 reward: +5 tracker points

assuming your muse has changed in some way, be it internally or as a result of a change of the external factors around them, how is your muse different? these can be as small as an opinion on a song they hadn’t released previously or as big as a major change in their background.

jaeyeol changed the most out of all my muses admitted. there’s been a couple major switches with them. the biggest one is the change of pronouns that yeol is using (which are they/them/he/him) in addition to the bit of a gender crisis they’re having at the moment. they view of gender was always a bit skewed because of their parents, mostly their dad and all the rather conservative and religious beliefs he has. it took jaeyeol years to accept that they were queer and interesting men/male-presenting people, and still they struggle to admit that out loud even in spaces where they know no one will judge them. honestly i don’t think jaeyeol though much about gender and how they perceived their own gender, and honestly neither did i. it kinda hit me out of nowhere too, so that’s the story that jaeyeol is also getting. for now, they’re still very confused and have no idea what’s going on and the story here is that jaeyeol is testing out new pronouns to get a full idea of how not being perceived as only male makes them feel within space they’re comfortable in and giving everything a good, long Think. 

other changes include yeol being a year younger now, it never felt right to have them as a 97 liner tbh so i bumped it down a year and moved the date a couple days back as well. and of course jaeyeol got a faceclaim change. lastly, they are no longer a main vocal, they are now a dance and rap legend ft occasional vocals and honestly i love it for them. 

what does your muse think of their company and their group?

in short, jaeyeol likes catalyst overall. the music and lyrics are a bit weird some times but honestly it works for them somehow, and it also fits well with their personal style of dancing, which they’ve been able to bring to the forefront in helping choreograph for songs. the group has allowed them to continue to explore dance styles as they’ve choreographed and tried to figure out things that wouldn’t just work nicely for himself but also all the other members and how they dance. in addition to liking the general concepts and music, they’ve made some friends along the way, which is always nice. in terms of how they feel about gold star, just like every idol probably does, jaeyeol would like to fight them sometimes for the decisions they make or the way they lay out catalyst’s schedule, and their favorite pass time is stressing out their poor manager. though there’s no boiling hatred or anger towards anyone and they’re just vibing. all of this is pretty much the same way jaeyeol felt towards dimensions/unity prior to the restructuring of everything. the only real difference there is that previous jaeyeol was a bit salty they weren’t getting solo schedules and opportunities but that’s different now (maybe because i’m getting better at making claims and establishing what i want to do with my children, maybe not, the world may never know). so yeah, like i said, generally jaeyeol is pleased with catalyst and their success, even if that success isn’t what gold star has initially expected of them. 

is your muse on their first contract or their second? if they’ve renewed, what were their feelings around that at the time and what were their hopes for their second contract? if they haven’t renewed, what are their current thoughts on the end of their eventual first contract?

catalyst is still on their first contract, having debuted only in may of 2018. they haven’t been around long enough to move out of their dorms and jaeyeol is still stuck with a roommate and no pet to love on. their first contract renewal isn’t going to be happening until 2025, so both yeol and all the catalyst members have lots of time to think on what they want for their futures. jaeyeol is very appreciative of the fact that it’s still a good few years off because honestly, they have not a clue what their thoughts are on the end of their first contract. it’s weird for them to think that they would have dedicated seven years of their life to catalyst by then, and almost a full decade in total once you factor in the amount of time they spent training prior to debut. the few times that they have thought about this contract ending and them potentially signing onto another seven years spent at gold star has resulted in them going back in forth onw hat they want to do with their lives. on one hand, money is great, but on the other they could potentially have a successful solo career and be doing their own thing. also they’d be thirty-four years old by the time the end of a secret control rolled around to an end and ideally jaeyeol would like to have done the whole settling down, got married, and maybe even had a kid or two by that point. it really isn’t appealing to them to still be bopping around and going woo woo woo woo firetruck at that point. 

what are your muse’s goals and motivations?

jaeyeol’s main goals right now are to continue what little bit of a solo career that gold star has let them begin to build. it was just doing some choreography for catalyst but now they’re also being allowed to do modeling projects and expand more outside of the group, which is something that they are firmly enjoying. it’s not that they don’t love catalyst and being a member of the group, but they also like the idea of having an established solo career that is separate from just being an idol so that when catalyst eventually comes to an end sometime in the future, they have something to fall back on and rely on. i guess this is also their motivation in many ways. stability is something that they never really had growing up, which is odd considering that their family was well off in many different ways, but still, they want something more for themselves than the environment they grew up in, which was rather unpleasant. their current goals in relation to that is just continuing to grow and try more things, eventually they want to go on and start choreographing outside of the group and for other groups and maybe even solo songs if the opportunity arrives. in addition to their motivations i mentioned earlier, jaeyeol also just wants to like have something to take pride in and prove to people in their life that were trying to steer them in an entirely different direction where they didn’t want to go, that their happiness was most important and that they could be successful and respected even if they hadn’t gone on to be working a standard desk job or become a doctor or lawyer. they just want to be more than what they thought they could be while growing up and maybe one day be confident enough to speak out more and motivate others to do the same.

what is one conflict, internal or external, that your muse is currently dealing with, has recently dealt with, or will need to deal with in the future?

i touched on this fairly extensively in the first question honestly and explained the one real large ordeal that they are internally dealing with at the moment, and to reiterate, that is their gender and their gender expression. the idea of being anything other than male had never crossed jaeyeol’s mind, let alone potentially questioning their gender to a point of going outside the standard binaries. on top of doing that all in a country where something like that isn’t a widely accepted or supported thing. they thought the only struggle they were going to have like this was their sexual orientation but at least, they were proven wrong. the conflict was brought upon because of me actually and suddenly i realized that i was naturally using gender neutral pronouns to refer to jaeyeol and took it as a sign that my brain was trying to tell me something. so here we are. the idea of jaeyeol questioning their own gender crosssed my mind briefly when i first conjured the image of the muse in my head but it was never any substantial thought, but apparently i had the thought for good reason. and like i also said earlier, they’re testing out the whole option of being non-binary and being perceived as such with those closest to them, including their partner and friends as of right now. though they have no idea where they would be on that spectrum, in terms of whether they feel like they are agender, genderfluid, etc.

if your muse has established career claims, what are their thoughts on their career so far? if they do not, how do they feel about not having individual activities yet? what would they like to do in the future, if anything? if they don’t have ambitions for individual activities, explain why.

jaeyeol is living their absolute best life in their career right now if they were to be straight up asked, even though it isn’t much of a solo career outside of their group in the way that people would probably think about having a solo career like having solo music (which is something they aren’t super interested in honestly). the only things that they really have done on their own is some solo magazine covers because gold star media finally came to their sense and realized that they have that absolute beauty that is jaeyeol jeon and are putting those looks to great use other than being (arguably) catalyst’s center or one of the unofficial center’s of the group. so far there’s only been two but they look forward to doing many, many more in the future when the calls come in asking for them. the other part of their established career claims come from partial choreography claims on a few of catalyst’s tracks, including: firetruck, cherry bomb, simon says, and kick it. the list is short but in my brain they’ve been doing their own dance choreographies to songs on instagram/ social medias as well, those are just some of the real official things they have their name attached to at the moment. both of those paths are ones that they would like to continue on with and hope they get to for a long time. the next step they would like to take is choreographing for other groups or people so they can keep expanding their talents and abilities.

[fanfic-inator795]

Once Rise sucks me back in on the seventh, I plan on drawing that Hippoworm wedding pic (sorry about the wait btw), so if you wanted to elaborate on that (either the mutant or Repo’s Seven AU version of their wedding) I would like to see if I could work any headcanons in, or at least have them in mind while I’m drawing?

Awww, thank you! ^v^ And no worries! I totally get kinda losing interest in a project for a bit cause of various things, and your art is totally worth the wait! ^v^

Heh, I’m not sure how many of these you can fit into a drawing, and it’s totally fine if you can’t fit them in, I know I’m gonna love your drawing no matter what! ^v^ 

But I’m gonna list out as much as I can just cause I love gushing about/thinking about fictional weddings (if only because a. I love my OTPs and I wanna see them happy and b. there’s a good chance I’ll never get married, and if I do it’ll most likely be a quick courthouse thing, so this is my outlet. Apologies in advance if this gets kinda long, lol). Anyway:

Mutant:

For obvious reasons, they couldn’t go all out, but they did as much as they could, having a small ceremony in Central Park at night with the reception being at an empty warehouse down at the docks (since their apartment would be WAYYYY too small, even if there’s less than a dozen people attending their wedding.)

The ELoM attend (mostly for the free food, but also because hey, it’s a sweet occasion and despite their villainy, they aren’t heartless.)

Meatsweats even offers to bring the cake, and Warren and Hypno agree since it’s the one dish he can’t put mutant meat in. Todd officiates so who knows if it’s completely legal but whatever, it’s a real wedding to them at least and that’s all that matters. They also make sure to record their wedding so they can watch it over and over

Warren was a bit of a groomzilla, because he loves Hypno so much and just wants everything to be right and perfect. He never takes it out on Hypno, thankfully, but everyone else kinda has to keep their distance until he’s able to chill tf out

Hypno makes all the flowers for the ceremony himself through his magic. LOTS of roses - mainly pink, purple and yellow with red at the tips (which, of course, symbolize friendship turning into love)

They walk down the aisle together, Warren on Hypno’s shoulder and the two of them holding hands (er, finger).

Hypno’s vows are so dang sappy and romantic that it takes Warren a few minutes to calm himself down enough to say his own vows. Warren also includes a bit of Maori in his vows as a nod to his husband’s culture. It’s a bit broken, but the message can still be understood and Hypno is still touched by the gesture

At the reception and after the first dance, Warren sings a love song to Hypno, wanting to give Hypno a little something extra since their dancing is really just Hypno swaying back and forth with Warren in his hands, and Hypno absolutely loves it, practically falling in love with him all over again on the spot.

Not that it matters really cause of the mutant situation, but Hypno takes Warren’s last name, hyphenating his own and becoming Mezmer-Ron “Hypnopotamus” Patel-Stone.

...idk if they’d actually do this but the idea is kinda funny to me so I’m mentioning it here: A couple weeks later, they stage another wedding and invite the Turtles to it, turning it into an elaborate trap.

“I can’t believe it. You would pretend to get married and fake a whole wedding just to try and capture us?!”

“Oh no no, the marriage is legitimate. We had our actually wedding at the start of the month.” “Technically this is our honeymoon.” *the two share a kiss* “We just thought that since we had all this leftover wedding stuff, well, two birds with one stone and all that.” “Just consider it a wedding present to us, since getting you four out of the way for good really would make my happiest day even happier!”

Of course the Turtles escape and Warren and Hypno are defeated, but they quickly shrug it off. It was worth a shot, and at least they still have each other.

Repo’s Seven AU:

While they may be human, they still can’t afford a HUGE ceremony, but it’s still a lovely one. They’re able to rent out a nice dining hall, at least.

Warren’s parents and work friends come, and while Ron’s able to invite friends as well, his mother and a couple of his relatives are unable to attend since they’re all the way in New Zealand. It’s a bit of an emotional hurtle that Ron has to get over, but at the very least his mother is able to send her love and they’re able to send her video and photos in return

I could see Ron wearing a sharp looking black suit with a purple tie while Warren wears a very handsome baby-blue suit with a white tie

Maori songs and vows are incorporated into the ceremony

Again, Warren takes a moment to sing a love song to Ron during the reception, because I love that idea too much for it to only exist in one universe

The two pretty much spent all they could on their wedding and couldn’t afford a honeymoon at all, but they didn’t mind. After the reception, they just went back to their apartment and spent the rest of the night together. Talking, cuddling, kissing, a bit more singing on Warren’s part since he got a bit tipsy lol, lots of expressions of love since it is their wedding night after all, and eventually falling asleep in each other’s arms. 

Both were admittedly disappointed that they couldn’t take a trip, but after such a perfect wedding night, they couldn’t really be disappointed anymore and just enjoyed their long weekend.

After the events of Repo’s Seven/they’ve become secret millionaires and after they’ve moved out to California and settled down some (Warren getting a new newscaster job, Ron getting a couple nice breaks as he continued working towards his dream career as a professional stage magician, getting a house, etc.) the two decide to have another wedding ceremony and are able to renew their vows in Ron’s New Zealand hometown.

Granted, even with all the money they have now, they don’t go insane with it or anything, but they are still able to treat themselves and have elements of their dream wedding

This includes doves being released when they have their kiss (Hypno’s idea), lots of gold incorporated into the decor (Warren’s idea), and an actual band for the reception (both of their ideas). Stuff like that, where it’s a bit of a splurge but it’s not like they’re burning money on stupid or unnecessary stuff

So yeah, these are just my ideas, and I’d honestly love to hear a fellow Hippoworm fan’s ideas, since I’m sure yours differ at least a little from mine, and like I said, I just love talking about fictional weddings ^v^

[tigerkirby215]

5e Seraphine, the Starry-Eyed Songstress build (League of Legends)

(Artwork by Jennifer Wuestling. Made for Riot Games.)

I mean I’m going to have to build her eventually, right? Honestly Tasha’s Cauldron comes out tomorrow so I may as well take a bit of a cheat day and make a build for the new champ. I mean I still have to and pick out a bunch of spells so at least I’m doing that?

Samira build is going to come out sometime in the year 3587 lol.

GOALS

Lookin' for a song in everything I meet! - Seraphine is a stage performer, rallying the whole crowd into song to make it loud and proud!

You're all breathtaking! - Seraphine can unite everyone around her with shields and heals. COUGH SONA COUGH.

Sing it with me! - When the time comes Seraphine can bring the whole world closer together! Good thing she isn’t mute.

RACE

I would really love to do a funny joke and say that Seraphine is a Tiefling or an Orc or something but no: she’s a Human. I can’t even justify any of the Eberron races so we’ll just be going for good ol’ Variant Human.

As a human you can increase two ability scores of your choice: pump up your Charisma and Dexterity to keep fit and beautiful. You can also learn a skill of your choice and for hearing so strong you can hear the voices of a dying nation inside your special necklace take Perception proficiency. You can also take any language of your choice so I’d suggest one that fits with your group, or whichever one you think is Korean. Actually I think Seraphine sung in Chinese which also made people mad? Man Riot can’t stop making her controversial, huhn?

But of course the main appeal of Variant Human is the free feat at level 1. I think Alert is pretty good for mimicking super sensitive hearing. Along with a +5 bonus to initiative you can’t be surprised nor can you be snuck up on. Being able to hear everyone has its perks, huhn?

ABILITY SCORES

15; CHARISMA - If you’re gonna get the crowd to adore you you’ve gotta look the part.

14; CONSTITUTION - I don’t care if Seraphine is a squishy midlane mage we simply don’t need anything else more. Feel free to swap this out with a different stat if you want better roleplay but worse health.

13; DEXTERITY - You need to be able to keep your balance on a moving platform as well as be able to dance along with the K/DA crew.

12; WISDOM - Seraphine’s big thing is being able to hear the emotions of everyone. Knowing what makes people tick is Insight, which is a Wisdom skill.

10; INTELLIGENCE - Seraphine is just your average, everyday girl. Ditzy and a little clueless.

8; STRENGTH - Seraphine can best be described as “petite.” Muscles in the chest hurt your nice soprano.

BACKGROUND

Now you may not know this but Seraphine is a singer, which is a type of Entertainer. As an Entertainer you get proficiency in Performance (obviously) and Acrobatics as well as a music instrument of your choice (Indie Seraphine plays guitar so grab a Lute) and a Disguise Kit, so maybe you can disguise the fact that you’re a copy of So...

Being the premier superstar of Piltover means that you get to tour around a lot By Popular Demand. You can perform in exchange for a place to stay, and doing so will get people to notice you! "Music helps you keep your head up."

(Artist unknown. Blame LoL Wiki. Artwork made for Riot Games.)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - BARD 1

YOU MAY BE SURPRISED TO HEAR THAT SERAPHINE IS A BARD. As a Bard you get proficiency in three skills as well as three instruments! Choose whatever instruments you want (you mostly sing, and the majority of magical instruments are Lutes anyways which you’re already proficient in) (my secret advice? Pan Flutes and Horns have a few magic instruments) but for your skills take Insight to hear the crowd, Persuasion to rally the crowd, and Arcana to learn why your magic crystal is screaming.

You also get Bardic Inspiration! Seraphine talks about being inspired so she can inspire others, and you can inspire your allies with a d6 to add to Attack Rolls, Saving Throws, and Skill Checks!

But of course Bards are spellcasters with Spellcasting too! You can learn two cantrips from the Bard list: Prestidigitation will let you get some special effects on stage and Vicious Mockery doesn’t have to be mockery... It would just be a lot cooler if it was.

You also learn four spells from the Bard list: Comprehend Languages will let you understand everyone’s song, and Faerie Fire will let you light up their life. On the more unnerving end Dissonant Whispers will let folk listen to your crystal, and Detect Magic will let you tell exactly what kind of magic you’re hearing. That’s weird: why is the Hextech crystal radiating Necromancy?

LEVEL 2 - BARD 2

Second level Bards are Jack of All Trades, being able to add half their proficiency bonus to any skill check. Because you see the rhythm in everything! Additionally you get Song of Rest, helping your friends take a break and recover more health during short rests.

But most importantly you get another spell! Another way to cheer someone up is to give them a good laugh, and Tasha’s Hideous Laughter will make them do just that! Maybe they’re laughing about the fact that Riot keeps insisting your not a copy of Sona? Oh don’t worry the jabs at Seraphine as a character are just gonna keep coming.

LEVEL 3 - BARD 3

Third level Bards get Expertise in two skills: choose Insight to hear the souls of both cities, and Performance because... yeah duh. You don’t become famous in a day.

But much more importantly you get your choice of Bard College, and for the rich and fabulous the College of Glamour will make sure everyone loves you! You can now officially captivate the whole audience (up to your Charisma modifier) with your Enthralling Performance, charming them and making them idolize you and defend you on Twitter. To both shield your allies and speed them up with Surround Sound Mantle of Inspiration takes a Bonus Action to give them Temporary Hitpoints and let them take a reaction to move out of danger. Yeah this was pretty much on a silver platter for me so I figured I’d take it.

You can also learn another spell and for an effective Beat Drop take Hold Person, rooting them in place for long enough that your ADC can do their magic.

LEVEL 4 - BARD 4

4th level comes with your first Ability Score Improvement. Charisma is pretty much everything for us now so pumping that up would be helpful!

You can also learn another spell and another cantrip! For your cantrip Dancing Lights will let you light up your stage and also pulls double duty by letting your dumb human eyes see in the dark. As for leveled spells Suggestion is a more direct form of emotional manipulation, suggesting actions for the other person to take. These actions can’t be directly harmful or against what the character would normally do, but “you should buy my $30 release skin” is a fairly ordinary request, right?

(Picture from Seraphine’s Twitter. Yup Seraphine is definitely real.)

LEVEL 5 - BARD 5

5th level Bards get Font of Inspiration, allowing their Bardic Inspiration to come back on a Short rest instead of a Long rest. This is great because your Bardic Inspiration die also increases to a d8, increasing your Mantle of Inspiration Temp HP too!

You can also learn third level spells but the keyword here is can because I’m actually going to stick at second to take spells like Calm Emotions. Man you’ll never guess what this spell does.

While Calm Emotions is a nice spell feel free to deviate from my builds as you see fit. Like seriously a temporary ceasefire is nice but so is a huge Fear cone.

LEVEL 6 - BARD 6

6th level Glamour Bards can make people dance like they have a magical instrument from Ionia. Mantle of Majesty lets you Concentrate on a not-spell once per Long Rest and get the ability to cast the Command actual-spell as a Bonus Action for one minute. Command lets you make one word commands at your enemy as long as they can understand you and you aren’t asking them to do something harmful to themselves. So commands like “Dance!” “Sing!” and “Cheer!” are all viable (though perhaps not effective in a teamfight.)

You can also add another spell to your spell list but again the third level Bard spells aren’t too enticing to me, so take Enthrall to make sure they concentrate on you and you alone.

Oh and you get Countercharm, letting you use an action to give allies against Frightening and Charming effects. Or they could buy some Tenacity. Or you could get a Paladin.

LEVEL 7 - BARD 7

7th level Bards get 4th level spells and Confusion will get the crowd mixed up in the noise, resulting in a cacophony that would sound like unbearable noise to most. Because it is unbearable noise. But at least your friends can fight them in the madness.

LEVEL 8 - BARD 8

8th level Bards get another Ability Score Improvement. Do you know what’s helpful for a class based entirely on Charisma? Maxed out Charisma!

You know what else is helpful? Charm Monster, so you can talk to any crystal scorpions that might be looking for their family. I mean, assuming the Brackern speak human.

(Picture from Seraphine’s Twitter. Yup Seraphine is definitely real.)

LEVEL 9 - BARD 9

9th level sees your Song of Rest increase to a d8. Does this ability scale really poorly? Yeah kinda.

At least you get 5th level spells now. If you want some high notes that’ll dance around you Animate Objects will let you make a bunch of tiny objects to hit your foes! Honestly at this point all the Enchantment spells become uhhh... evil? So we have to go for a different school if we want “good” spells.

LEVEL 10 - BARD 10

10th level Bards get Expertise in two more skills: Persuasion will help you shift the hearts of a nation. Take whatever skill you want as your secondary one since it honestly doesn’t matter too much. (I personally opted for Perception.)

But more importantly it’s Magical Secrets time! This will let you get any spell from any class’ spell list and add it to your own! Most of the time when you get this feature you want to grab some stuff at the max level you can cast but I’m actually going to go down to third level for some support and buffs! For a healing aura around you take Aura of Vitality from the Paladin spell list. To quickly charm a crowd Incite Greed will force everyone to be charmed by you as they want to see your 50 dollar Brackern Corpse... I mean Hextech crystal.

Along with your two Magical Secrets you also get another cantrip. Message is always good to keep plans in team chat.

LEVEL 11 - BARD 11

11th level Bards get 6th level spells like Otto's Irresistible Dance, which forces everyone to get into the rhythm! It’s much harder to fight when you’re dancing: it’s like being stunned! Good thing only you can force a stunning dance on enemies.

LEVEL 12 - BARD 12

12th level Bards get an Ability Score Improvement but now that your Charisma is maxed you can grab Inspiring Leader to rally everyone together for an awesome performance!

(Artist unknown. Blame LoL Wiki. Artwork made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 13 - BARD 13

13th level Bards see their Song of Rest increase to a d10, and this is the point where I make a joke about Song of Rest scaling poorly.

You at least get 7th level spells, and because none of these really fit Seraphine I’m going to suggest Mordenkainen's Magnificent Mansion for a K/DA stage. But again I need to remind people that I’m picking options for RP and you’re welcome to build the character however you want. Take what you think will be useful and make your own song!

LEVEL 14 - BARD 14

14th level Eloquence Bards have Unbreakable Majesty! As a Bonus Action you can put on your Ultimate Skin to force enemies to make Charisma saves if they try to attack you. If they fail, they’ll target someone else! This is a great way to keep the damage off you since you don’t exactly have great HP or AC. Do remember that it only lasts for a minute though, but you can get it back at the end of a Short or Long rest.

Additionally you get two more Magical Secrets! If you want to sing to enemies far and long (but maybe not Wide) Gravity Fissure is a Dunamancy spell that forces everyone in a line to take a massive amount of damage and be pulled to the center of the spell.

Now that you got your ultimate the world is honestly your oyster. My recommendation to get a crowd to put their hands up would be Chain Lightning, but that’s more because the spell is good than because it fits Sera.

LEVEL 15 - BARD 15

15th levels get their maximum Bardic Inspiration die of a d12! This also means that your Mantle of Inspiration will now give everyone 15 temporary hitpoints! "Harmonize!"

LoL Wiki doesn’t let me link to voice lines anymore and that’s a true crime.

And hey; 8th level spells! If you want to make some Gamers™ mad about your “cash grab” Twitter account just inflict them with Feeblemind so they can spam pictures of Skarner like the marketing department gets to choose what the champion designers make. Because remember: even if Seraphine isn’t real the people pretending to be her are, so don’t be an ass please!

LEVEL 16 - BARD 16

Who likes ASIs? We haven’t used our hyper-sensitive hearing enough so take the Observant feat for a +1 to Wisdom and a +5 to passive Perception and Investigation. And the ability to pick up on lyrics by reading people’s lips!

Are there more useful feats? Yeah, but we build for character here. If you want a powerbuild check out Reddit.

(Picture from Seraphine’s Twitter. Yup Seraphine is definitely real.)

LEVEL 17 - BARD 17

17th level Bards get to pretend that Song of Rest is a good ability! It’s a d12 now so I’m sure it’s useful now that your party all have around 100 HP!

But you finally get access to your mythical 9th level spells! Honestly all the options are great for a girl who has everything, but I’m going to go for the fun Music Video option of True Polymorph. Turn Akali into a dragon! Turn Evelynn into a demon! Turn Skarner into a battery! The possibilities are endless! (Unlike the #BrackernRights memes.)

LEVEL 18 - BARD 18

18th level Bards get their last two Magical Secrets. This is also the last two spells you’ll be getting so better make them count! Of course the best way to make a spell count is to Wish for anything. With this you can finally unite Piltover and Zaun, as long as you believe enough! Or you can bring back Skarner’s family...

For something a little more in-character and a lot more immediately practical: Mass Heal is the perfect Catch-22 to negate any burst. A burst of 700 HP to everyone is never not useful for a bit of Redemption.

LEVEL 19 - BARD 19

19th level Bards get their last Ability Score Improvement: we have an uneven Wisdom score thanks to our last Feat so eh. May as well take Resilient Wisdom for better saving throws and even scores.

LEVEL 20 - BARD 20

20th level Bards have Superior Inspiration! When you roll initiative and have no uses of Bardic Inspiration left, you regain one use. That is literally how the ability is worded. I mean, okaaaaay? At least you can spam Mantle of Inspiration a little more?

FINAL BUILD

PROS

Whole world hears me now! - You’re a full caster with no multiclassing! 9th level spells: no strings attached! You’ve even got a nice spread between Concentration spells and Non-Concentration spells, as well as both utility and combat spells.

Everyone fights to be heard; I'll fight to listen - Being a Bard means you’re good at just about everything, and particularly good at a select few things. 29 Passive Perception? +17 to Persuasion?

We've only just met and I'm already inspired - Who would’ve guessed that a Support class built to support well would be a good support? You’ve got charms, heals, and CC a plenty along with Inspiring Leader to bolster everyone before a battle and Mantle of Inspiration to keep everyone moving with the music!

CONS

Stage fright? Never heard of it - A lot of your BADDEST™ toys are locked behind big spell slots. You’ve only got two 6th level slots, and just one 9th level slot despite having three different 9th level spells to choose from. Again feel free to build your spell list however you want as I just picked what fit in character.

Pretend it's a big rehearsal - Your DEX is meh, your CON is meh. 140 HP isn’t godawful but it isn’t great when you’ll likely have 14 AC at best with Studded Leather. You know what’s really hot right now? Tattoos. See if your DM’s a cool dude who’ll pass you a Rare Barrier Tattoo from Tasha’s to essentially get Medium Armor! Elven Chain is also nice and pretty.

Joy's too quiet without sorrow on the downbeat - I don’t want to make two points related to your stats but they’re the only thing that’s really hurting in this build. Your only good stat is Charisma: and everything else ranges from meh (+2 in DEX / WIS / CON) to bad (0 in INT, -1 in STR.) While you’ll still be able to roleplay with Jack of All Trades skills your Saving Throws hurt. Your concentration is bad and anything heavy will break your petite spine in two. Luckily INT saves aren’t common but anything Strength or Constitution based will quickly put an end to your performance.

Uniting the world in song isn’t easy, but if anyone can do it it’s you. Harmonize, move with the rhythm, and unite everyone through song. There’s nothing you can’t do, and no one can bring you down down down down down down. Well, except perhaps an angry crystal scorpion monster and his army of Twitter followers.

(Artist unknown. Blame LoL Wiki. Artwork made for Riot Games.)

[radramblog]

Linkin Park Retrospective Part 6: The EPs

I can’t listen to One More Light yet. Don’t have it in me to tackle that. So instead, we’re going to cover the two EPs released by the band, Collision Course and Songs from the Underground.

Collision Course

…who’s idea was this?

Apparently MTVs, as part of an “Ultimate Mashups” series, though their involvement seemed mostly hands off. A 6-track Jay-Z/Linkin Park crossover album isn’t an idea I would have tried to sell, but Mike and Jay seem pretty into it based on the snippets of studio chatter you get in between tracks. The album opens with that, in fact- Chester (?) going “I ordered a Frappucino where’s my fuckin Frappucino?” is certainly one way to start things off.

I’m just going to make it clear now that I’ve never heard most of the Jay-Z tracks being mashed up here, so I can’t really comment on that end. As these tracks are mashups with songs I am quite familiar with, though, I can at least give some degree of assessment. And unfortunately, I’d argue Collision Course compares unfavourably to Reanimation as far as crossover albums go. Largely speaking the remixes done to the Linkin Park instrumentals are uninteresting, though they do match the new vocals done over the top of them, and Jay-Z is basically fine but not overwhelming.

I think my biggest issue with this album is that a bunch of the songs just drop just about everything new about them and are just the Linkin Park track for the last like minute or so- Dirt off your Shoulder/Lying from You, Jigga What/Faint, and Points of Authority/99 Problems/One Step Closer are all pretty guilty of this. That isn’t to say that the rest of these tracks aren’t good, but this in particular is a sticking point I couldn’t ignore.

Track-by-track, then. Dirt off your Shoulder/Lying from You is the most straightforward track on the whole project, and probably the biggest sufferer from eventually just being Lying from You (seeing as that’s kinda the worst of those three LP tracks). I have no idea whats going on in the instrumental from Big Pimpin’/Papercut, but the Papercut verse on top of that sounds just sort of weird- Jay-Z’s verse fits better, but also, that’s probably the one written for that instumental isn’t it. Jigga What/Faint is interesting, with the first half’s backing being a heavily remixed version of the verse instrumental from Faint, but a minute in it’s just Faint oops. With that said, Jays bars over that instrumental actually does fit pretty well.

I don’t know rap that well, I can’t really comment on the flow or anything, but while the vocals are new recordings, they are the same verses from the songs being mashed up, so some originality is lost there.

Numb/Encore is the one single from this album, and it’s definitely one of the better ones, yeah. You’ve got Mike and Jay both working together in bits, the remixed Numb instrumental feels like exactly the extrapolation you’d want for a track like this, and that “what the hell are you waiting foooooor” is super satisfying. Unlike some of the other tracks, the final bit (with Chester, yknow, doing Numb) maintains that remixed instrumental, making it stand out a bit better from the original versions, which is nice. However, Jay-Z basically just isn’t on the latter half of the track, making it extremely awkward when he did a live performance of it after Chester’s passing.

For a song called Encore, however, it’s a bit weird that it’s not the last track on the album.

Izzo/In The End opens with this really bright instrumental and Mike, thanking a live audience like it’s a concert, sure. It’s just super odd that this is the same song with the In the End vocals, the emotions not really fitting the fun of the instrumental and previous verse. It is performed significantly more light-heartedly, but it still feels like an odd fit. To be fair, though, I’m not sure what Hybrid Theory/Meteora era track would have worked better there, so fair play. The album ends with Points of Authority/99 Problems/One Step Closer, ther first half of which I actually think is better than Numb/Encore. It’s got an actual fresh verse from Mike over Points of Authority, and him doing the cop bit from 99 Problems’ pull over bit actually works super well. Unfortunately, when the instrumental switches over to One Step Closer, the song gets a bit worse- the mix on Jay-Z’s vocals is way too low for a lot of it, being drowned out by the instrumental most of the time, and the last minute is just One Step Closer again but also Jay-Z is occaisionally repeating the 99 Problems line. It’s a weak finish to an otherwise solid song and album.

 Songs from the Underground

Released in 2008, Songs from the Underground is a collection of tracks from Linkin Park Underground collated into an EP along with a couple of unreleased live recordings. Linkin Park Underground, or LPU, is the official fan club, which gets a yearly CD as part of membership that has assorted demos and live versions on it, which is where this EP pulls its tracks from- its also a set of CDs I desperately want to get my hands on but their limited nature makes their price obscene. I have managed to get LPU 9, which is the one I wanted most, but the remainder have eluded my grasp.

My precioussssssssssss

Side note, this album isn’t on spotify, and the only Youtube upload I could find was a shit recording, so you’re best off looking for each individually.

This compilation opens with Announcement Service Public (from LPU6), a pretty decent instrumental with Chester screaming unintelligibly in the background. This is more of a joke than anything- as the name suggests, it’s a PSA reversed, and reversing Chester’s vocals reveals he’s yelling a reminder to brush your teeth and wash your hands. I mean, I’ve been in an LP mosh once, and I can confirm that this was an announcement that needed making.

The second track QWERTY (LPU6), sounds like it wasn’t even written by Linkin Park, rather, one of their contemporaries. Allegedly, they wrote it on a long, long plane flight, which I could see- a non-studio environment leading to a more different track. Honestly, this could fit right on to Meteora, as much like Faint or Nobody’s Listening it’s a different take on the sound they’re known for. This one’s a lot of fun- the riffs are sick, and the chorus, if simple, is solid to sing along to. This deserves main album status.

And One is one of the tracks on this album that’s actually a rerecording off of the EP made by the band when Hybrid Theory was their name and not just their first album (though the EP was self-titled, so it’s pretty confusing). This album would later be rereleased as the first LPU, and then again (with an official video) along with the 20th anniversary edition of Hybrid Theory. And One is interesting, as it’s the first track recorded after Chester joined the band back in the day, and it’s so fucking edgy holy shit. I think it’s pretty decent, but unlike with QWERTY I’m kinda ok with this being a little by the wayside. With that said, I really like the little breakdown at the end, and the verse Mike is doing over it.

Sold My Soul to yo Mama (LP4) is a real track, huh. It’s a short, heavily electronic piece, ganking lyrics from Points of Authority and Papercut, but like, it’s mostly just Joe Hanh fucking around for 2 minutes. Not a huge fan of this one.

Dedicated (LP2) is another of this album’s better songs. It’s very Lose Yourself, that sort of emotional rap track about doing a rap track, and while obviously it’s not at the same level as that one it’s still excellent on its own. This is just such an excellent demo, one of Mike’s best performances- and considering he’s carrying it on his own (I’m not sure Chester’s even on this, unless those background aaaahs are him) that means a lot.

The next track is Hunger Strike, actually a live recording by Chris Cornell (of Soundgarden and Audioslave fame) with Chester as a feature. They were good friends, which is going to come up tragically when we get to One More Light. To be honest, though, this track kinda sucks dick. It is far from Chris’s best performance, nor Chester’s, and the instrumental is fucking boring. It picks up around the two minute mark, but at that point it just sounds like a bad Audioslave song, and I’m not really down for that, yknow. Just go listen to Like a Stone or Black Hole Sun again.

Another live recording is next, My December (a B-Side from One Step Closer, also on LPU2). My December is far from my favourite track- I think it’s kinda overdone, and this live version is so much worse. Look, it’s just Chester singing over someone (maybe him?) playing the song on piano? It doesn’t work, man. Not a fan.

The album’s final track is called Part of Me (HTEP/LPU1), and feels a lot like a better version of And One, if I’m honest. Mike’s actually going hard here in the verses, especially in the pre-chorus, and said chorus is actually pretty solid, even though the instrumental there is a little weak. It’s a slow, chugging song, heavily affected through Hahn’s DJing, that does do a nice little build to the track’s ending.

Except it doesn’t end, because there’s a hidden track in it. I don’t think this one has an official name anywhere, but it’s an electronic instrumental. It’s basically ok. Tangent, but I remember thinking when I was younger that if I was ever in a band, I’d want to write an electronic instrumental named Oxymoron- because of course, it wouldn’t have any real instruments in it.

That closes out Songs from the Underground, and I’ve never really broken it down in my head before, but it’s a lot more mediocre than I thought. The live songs are not good, and several demos or rarities that should have been on it absolutely weren’t- Across the Line, Drawing, A6, and where the fuck was High Voltage? Honestly, more of a miss than I remember. If I’m low on ideas, I might break down LPU9 individually, but I probably won’t spend any other time on LP demo stuff- I’m sure you’re sick to death of me talking about Linkin Park by now.

[takethistoyourstardust]

OH I should give my thoughts on LRFes maybe. Overall: I loved it and I cried. More detailed thoughts below.

EVERYONE WAS IN COSTUME!!!!!!

Everyone was also in character so in this I flip between their va’s and their characters I apologize.

Argonavis was first up and I swear I love Masa’s voice but for some reason Goal Line was super rough to start out with. As they proceeded with the setlist it got better thought! They played Starry Line and Pray back to back so they REALLY wanted to wring the tears out of people but the song that made me most emotional was Ameagari no Sakamichi, the ending theme to the anime.

Next up was Fujin RIZING! and oh my god Run-Gun-Run FUCKS SO HARD. For some reason Yoshiki had a very ikemen quality to his voice when he sang RGR which made me at 5 am go *blushing emoji*. Aoi’s VA was also there too (also in costume!!) and Yoshiki ad-libbed a bit about the typhoon that almost delayed the live hg. With Aoi’s VA they did Dachi Friend and Banzai RIZING. I think bc of covid restrictions the audience had to p much stay silent which I understand but it kinda stinks bc Banzai RIZING is literally a call and respond song, YOKATAI (YOKATAI) IKUBAI (IKUBAI) YOKATAI IKUBAI MINNA DE (BANZAI). Very fun!

Then it was Fantome Iris and oh my god they did NOT have to go so fucking hard but they did for US!!!!! Arthur we knew would be in full costume but he was the only one of the singing only seiyuus that had a support band AND THE SUPPORT BAND WAS DRESSED LIKE THE OTHER MEMBERS OF FANIRI!!!!!!!! Shout out to the support band!!!! Especially the HARU cosplayer how the hell did you play with those fucking sleeves!!!! He did historie, Zakuro, and Gin no Yuri, and honestly he embodied the more mature vibes his character has, at least onstage. His movements were so elegant, even during the harder rock vibes of Zakuro. He understands his character extremely well, and it showed on stage.

Epsilon Phi was next, a complete tonal whiplash, but Yuki was SO much fun to watch. I was so glad they gave him full pants and not the shorts Shuu wears I think my brain would’ve melted out of my head if that happened. He opened with Sake It Love! (it’s pronounced “shake” but the official name is “sake”) which is probably my favorite EpsPhi original with just Shuu singing. He brought out a fan near the end it was cute. The whole idea is that his character is twelve but a musical genius and also “face of an angel mind of a demon” thing, which rly hit with the song progressions. The second was Play With You which is my least favorite of the EpsPhi songs BUT near the end he brought out the puppet version of Ren and that made me fucking scream. With delight or confusion I’m still not sure, probably both. He yeeted it across the stage I was fucking wheezing. The last song was Hikari no Akumu, and I’m gonna be honest, until this point I was not sold on Shuu. But at the very end, Yuki let out this really loud laugh, and then just... slumped over, and suddenly I was reminded that Shuu is a lonely child who’s the heir of a record label but has no “real” family and doesn’t know how to connect to the world around him without seeing it as “his toybox”. It felt... disturbing, which was exactly the vibe he wanted I think.

Finally, GYROAXIA. And can I just say that OgaJin here sounded better than even in the Ignition live a month ago???? Like oh my god even when they opened with MANIFESTO I was like “holy shit he’s actually hitting the notes and not falling flat on them”. I SOUND SO MEAN TALKING ABT MASA AND OGAJIN I really do adore their voices. Anywhoms, it was mostly songs we already have studio releases for, with the exception of GETTING HIGH, which fucked hard. During GETTING HIGH OgaJin ended up taking off his jacket and didn’t put it back on for the rest of the setlist, and his shirt was sleeveless. All the simps lost their minds. I also thought SCATTER was going to be their final song and was like “oh thank GOD they aren’t playing Ignition or else I’d fucking cry” and at the very end OgaJin was like “this is our final song... Ignition” and I realized I was BooBoo The Fool. Teared up.

They didn’t do nyrn Starting Over for the encore but they DID play it announcing the WeGO NayuRen collab. PLEASE look at it. Who the fuck chose Nayuta’s outfit. Ren’s is very cute but the word on his hoodie is the word for the seven stars of the big dipper which is Literally Just His Last Name (Seven Stars = Nanahoshi).

BUSHI ROCK FES IN FEBUARY WITH RAS AND GYRO AND RONDO LET’S MOTHER FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOO

The encore was cuteeeeeeee, Masa almost cried ;w;... AND THEN THEY DID THE FIVE VOCALIST VERSION OF AASIDE WHICH I FUCKING CALLED!!!!!!!!!!

This is kinda unrelated but during AAside, this fanart of Kasumi Toyama from the Girls Band Party half of the franchise popped up, with the caption “looking for the kirakira dokidoki” and that pushed me over the edge to full on sobbing, but the good kind. It made me realize how far this franchise I love had come, from just Aimi announcing she was making a band to this huge franchise popular enough to get a spin off as good as AAside... like I put on my twitter, “thank you for paving the way, our little star”.

SO YEAH overall I’m super happy with LRFes! I hope they keep livestreaming these lives,,, weh...

[eldritchsurveys]

865.

Are you still in quarantine/under stay at home order? (if you're taking this during Covid-19, that is) >> No, the governor’s executive stay-at-home order ended in June. Personally, I still stay at home except for weekly grocery trips and trips to the Wayland house because... well, where else am I going to go? Aside from take walks.

Has stuff been opening back up where you are? >> Eh. It’s been kind of confusing. Many restaurants are still closed / doing takeout, but I’ve heard that they’ve tried opening bars back up, which sounded completely dumb to me, like... of all places? but whatever. Most stores are open, I believe, with mask-wearing encouraged (I say it like that because it really is just a suggestion. There are no actual consequences for walking into a store without a mask, unfortunately, so some people still do it).

What have you missed most that you haven't been able to do due to Covid-19? >> I’ve mostly missed J. Gardella’s Tavern, which was on its way to being shut down anyway because they’d been bought out by some gastropub fuckers. But because of the executive order, I never got to go there for a last round. :( Also, I miss just being able to go downtown etc and walk around and do stuff. In general.

What state do you live in? >> Michigan.

Do you personally know anyone who has had Covid-19? >> No.

Have you had it? (or think you might have?) >> I have not had it, nor do I think I have it. Sometimes I get paranoid because there’s apparently quite a few “non-obvious” type symptoms that have gotten connected to COVID infection (like digestive issues), but, whatever.

Do you know anyone who is a healthcare worker? >> No. Sparrow works in a podiatrist’s office, but that’s not really the kind of healthcare worker I think this question means.

Have you still been working these past few months or not? >> I don’t work, period.

If you weren't working, are you still in school? >> No.

What is/was your major in college? >> ---

Or if you're not in college yet, what do you want to study? >> ---

If your school closed due to Covid-19, do you miss it? >> ---

What are you most excited about when life goes (somewhat) back to normal? >> I will be glad when we can stop wearing masks. You know, in like late 2021 or whenever. Because it sure won’t be any time soon, I can tell that much.

Did Covid-19 impact any major plans you had for this spring/summer? >> I didn’t have any major plans. All my ideas for the summer were pretty minor.

Do you collect anything? >> No.

What's the name of your favorite restaurant? (chain or local) >> Long Road Distillery.

What is your favorite thing to order when you eat there? >> I don’t remember, we were only there for dinner once but I immediately fell in love with the menu (and the drinks, by god).

Have you still been able to get food from there during Covid-19? >> Yeah, they have online ordering and curbside pickup. They make cocktail kits, too, which is cool.

Are you planning on eating there anytime soon when they reopen? >> Oh god, yeah. Definitely not any time soon even if they do reopen sooner than I think is safe, but... yeah.

Have you discovered any good new music during quarantine? >> I discover new music all the time.

What's a new song you've been loving lately? (not necessarily newly released, just something you've recently discovered) >> Heard a cover of Huey Lewis and the News’ Stuck With You by Twelve Foot Ninja recently that I thought was fun. Honestly, that song is just fun no matter what, though.

Have you been able to keep in touch with friends during this time? >> The majority of my social interaction was online anyway, so.

What is your favorite Starbucks drink? >> ---

Do you prefer Starbucks or a local coffee shop? >> I prefer local everything.

What was your favorite TV show when you were a kid? do you still ever watch it? >> ---

Have you been watching a lot of movies during quarantine? >> No more than I would be usually, since my daily life didn’t change as dramatically as most people’s did. But yeah.

What is your favorite Disney movie? >> Lilo & Stitch.

Do you have Disney plus? >> Nope.

Are you a fan of Hamilton? >> Never seen it.

Are you planning to watch Hamilton on Disney plus? >> No, because I don’t have Disney+...

Have you seen Hamilton live? (Broadway or elsewhere) >> No...

What is your favorite musical? >> Phantom of the Opera.

Have you watched any musicals online recently? >> No.

What was the last live performance you went to before quarantine? >> The last live performance I saw was the various acts at the Endless Night Vampire Ball in October.

What was the best concert you've ever been to? >> I’ve been to too many concerts to answer this.

Do you volunteer anywhere? >> No.

What is your favorite movie on Netflix? >> ??? There are... so many movies on Netflix.

Did you relocate due to Covid-19? >> No.

What is one positive thing about the past few months for you? >> I’m not sure.

Do you prefer streaming music or buying it? >> I stream it. I can’t in any way afford to buy the amount of music I listen to.

Do you use Spotify? >> Yeah.

What was the last book you read? >> The last book I finished was Making Friends With Death.

Have you been baking during quarantine? >> No. Sparrow did when she was furloughed.

What is your favorite thing to bake? >> I don’t like to bake.

Do you enjoy doing crafts? >> Eh.

Have you ever done crafts for money? >> No.

Do you shop on Etsy? >> Yes.

Have you ever sold anything on Etsy? >> No.

What song are you listening to right now? >> None. I thought about putting some on and then I forgot.

What genre of music is your favorite? >> ---

Can you speak any foreign languages? >> Not fluently.

What is/was your favorite class in school? >> ---

Who was your favorite teacher most recently? >> ---

What is the lock screen and home screen on your phone? >> Lock screen is a shot of Sam from Death Stranding. Home screen is from a live performance of Phantom.

Do you play Animal Crossing? >> Sometimes. Sparrow plays it more than I do, but even she’s stopped playing it as much because of that whole “get your island to a 5-star rating!” bullshit. It’s just aggravating.

Do you have any pets? What kind? What is/are your pet(s) name(s)? >> Sparrow has a cat and his name is Spooky.

what is a song lyric you love? >> Right, I’m definitely not going to think of that off the top of my head right now.

Have you done anything recently to support Black Lives Matter? >> No.

Are there any songs you feel transport you to a world that doesn't exist? >> They transport me to worlds that do exist. Just not on this plane.

What songs do that for you? >> Wardruna is good for it. But there are plenty of others, I’m just not trying to think of them all right now.

What is your favorite ethnicity/cuisine of food? >> Can’t choose.

What are some popular things that you don't like/aren't interested in? >> TikTok is one. Sparrow loves it and I watch the videos she shows me, and I don’t hate it or anything, but I would never download the app myself. Just not interested.

When was the last time you got a haircut? >> I last cut my hair... uh... a week ago? Roundabouts.

What was the last movie (or musical) you watched? >> The last movie I watched was The House That Jack Built.

What was the last movie you saw in the theatre? >> Birds of Prey.

How soon are you planning on going back to work? (If you've been off) >> ---

What is an item you own that means a lot to you? >> I finally got my Death Is the Road To Awe t-shirt and it means a lot to me because of what it references.

Do you have a favorite t-shirt? >> No.

What other proshot musicals would you love to see streaming online? >> *shrug* Haven’t thought about that.

What is something you're looking forward to? >> This heat wave to be over. I’ve had to skip so many daily walks because it’s just so hot so early lately.

How do you plan on celebrating Covid-19 being over, whenever that is? >> The problem with this idea is that... it’s not that simple? From what I understand, it’s not like one day we’re all gonna say “that’s it! we’ve officially eradicated this virus from the earth and we will never have to worry about it again!” I’m guessing it’s going to be a slow process of reopening with a lot of false starts and rollbacks (as new waves crest and protective measures have to be re-implemented). Even that first day that I go out to a restaurant is probably going to feel really weird and even a little “wrong”. I’m not sure how much celebrating is really going to be happening.

[purplesurveys]

718

If you lived in Bikini Bottom, would you befriend Spongebob or Plankton? Obviously Spongebob. I’m there to have a good time and catch jellyfish, not eat holographic meatloaf and make it my life’s goal to steal a secret formula. Do you have any bananas in your house right now? I think we still have some left. My dad bought a pack? a group? a bunch? of them so he can make banana cue and turon for my mom and sister while we’re all stuck at home for the meantime. Which overrated tattoo are you sick of seeing? Eh I don’t judge this easily since I assume tattoos mean a lot to people but where I’m from, line tattoos are pretty overused. They DO look nice and I get why they’ve been trending for a while, but yeah they’re evvvvvverywhere. Is it easy to distract you? Yes haha I have a rather quick attention span. Do you prefer to drink from glasses or mugs? Depends on the drink. I drink my water from a glass but I prefer my coffee in a mug, that sort of thing.

What was the last thing you taught a younger kid? I don’t feel confident teaching kids just yet, huhu. It usually works the other way around: when I’m with kids, they teach me how to play their toys or whatever game they’re playing on their parents’ phone/iPad. Are the clocks in your house mostly digital or analog? We only have one analog clock. We mostly tell the time from our phones. How long have you had your television(s)? Answered this before but we have two TVs that are 12 years old and two others that were bought within the last decade. Do you like watching movies made with CGI or do you prefer hand-drawn ones? I don’t care. As long as the end product is done well I can enjoy the movie. Where did your parents buy their car(s)? I know for sure the two family cars were bought directly from the official dealers. I think mine was a secondhand one. Do you know why your grandparents chose your mother's name? No. I think they just liked the name. That makes me want to ask my grandma though. What is your favourite kind of soup? Miso is the only one I really like. Have you ever made your own musical instrument? Nope. What do you think of Leighton Meester's singing voice? I only know one song of hers and I reeeeeally loved that when it came out, but I don’t think it’s enough for me to have an opinion for her music altogether. I definitely don’t hate her voice though. Do you think you'd do well at teaching the English language to a foreigner? Yeah, it’s my other everyday language and I’m a little bit more fluent in it than I am in Filipino. How long have your neighbours lived there? About the same time as us, I think. We all moved in at sort of the same time when the village was newly developed. Is it weird to hear your name in movies or TV shows? It’s not a very common name so it does feel a bit weird to hear, yes. It’s weirder if I have to refer to the character in third person cause I never liked saying my own name :/ Why do so many people seem to hate the Jonas Brothers? Am assuming this refers to the Jonas Brothers pre-reunion because I’m sure no one hates them and their new music now lmao. I think, simply put, it was because they were teenagers then, and pre-teen and teenage girls was their main fanbase? Most people liked to shit on that category of celebrities, even today – case in point, Justin Bieber, 5SOS, One Direction haha. What is a store you like that is exclusive to your country? Fully Booked! It’s the most complete, up-to-date, and chic bookstore brand we have. The Fully Booked branch in BGC in particular is a partnership with Starbucks, so you can immediately walk over there to get a coffee and read after buying a book heh. If you attend school, what time do you usually get home after? I always have extracurriculars like org stuff, meetings, or fieldwork after my academic schedule so more often than not I’ll get home by 9 or 10 PM, which leaves me feeling exhausted as fuck at the end of the day. When was the last time you really needed to just let loose? Like two weeks ago? I was bored out of my mind being stuck at home so I chugged a lot of soju that I asked my dad to buy so I can at least be drunk while being bored lol. Have you ever been blackmailed? Kinda. There was a time when I didn’t talk to my sister and didn’t really feel well enough to reconcile with her yet, but my mom threatened to go to our class guidance counselor and expose me and ‘the kind of older sister I am’ if I didn’t make amends with my sister immediately.

This might sound sarcastic but thanks, survey, for reminding me what kind of mom my mother actually was during the years that were the most critical to my development lmao. I always need reminders like this because despite how our relationship has ‘improved’ now that I’m older, I shouldn’t forget the trauma she caused me and the fact that I had always planned to detach myself from her as much as possible once I’m fully independent. I can’t disappoint my younger self by keeping her in my life as if nothing happened.

Do you suffer from Restless Leg Syndrome? No. I keep forgetting what that means. Would you rather have novels based on your life or a series of comic books? Novels, so I’d be more interested to read it. Have you written a resume before, either for yourself or someone else? I did a resumé when I applied for my internship. Did you know that they plan on releasing a movie based on The Smurfs? This survey is sooooooo old hah they’ve made a bunch of films on it already. Do you ever wonder what it would be like to live underwater? Not really. Mostly I’ve just wondered what it would be like to be a creature from the deep sea, where it’s totally dark and most of the animals there look prehistoric as fuck lol. Have you ever worked in a bakery? If not, would you like to? No but this question reminded me of Harry Styles, aw :’) ANYWAY if I did I’d probably take up a job in the office, since I can neither bake nor deal with people on a regular basis even if one argues that bakeries aren’t really particular spots for angry Karens or Barbaras. What is your favourite thing about snow? I like that we don’t get them because it’s bound to make my first encounter with snow in the future magical as fuck. Is there a big personality difference between you and your sibling(s)? Yeah. I tend to adapt to new environments way better than they do and I’m definitely the most extroverted of the three in all aspects.  Do you enjoy decorating things with stickers? Hahahah yes, it’s an uncontrollable urge. I keep my stickers to just my laptop case these days, but back then I used to put stickers on my phone case, my ID case, clipboard, wallet, etc. Did you lose anything recently? Did you end up finding it? I lose my hair tie every now and then; my hair’s a bit short for a ponytail now so my hair tie gradually slips out my hair with me barely noticing it, so it always ends up in random places around the house. I do end up finding it after a while but it gets frustrating whenever I realize it had fallen off again. What colour oven mitts do you have? We don’t really use the oven so we barely use the ones we have. I don’t even know the color of it.

Why do you/don't you watch award shows? Because there are sooo many commercials in the middle of it, some presenters are awkward as fuck and I’d rather save myself from the secondhand cringe, and most of the time the choices for the winners are undeserving and end up pissing everyone off. It’s always easier to just wait a few hours and check the results on Google; and besides, the only fun parts are seeing what everyone is wearing and who attends to begin with hah. What do you think of Ellen DeGeneres as the new judge on American Idol? God this was a lifetime ago. I think I mostly didn’t mind it but I never did get over the replacement of the OGs Randy, Simon, and Paula. Do you ever do the exercises featured in some magazines? No. Have you ever watched What The Buck? What do you think of it? I don’t think I’ve heard of that. How long ago did you switch from cable to satellite, if you did? We didn’t make a ‘switch,’ per se. We had cable in our old home but when we moved to our current house in 2008, having extra channels wasn’t really the priority as moving already entailed a whole lot of expenses to begin with. That meant we only had free TV for a while which was extremely fucking boring, but eventually my dad got us satellite in like 2011 or 2012. When was the last time you partnered up with someone to complete something? I decided to partner up with Andrew for my undergraduate thesis in like August last year. Do you consider Lady GaGa's appearance artistic, or just plain weird? Artistic. What do you usually do when you have trouble sleeping? I put a lengthy YouTube video on so I can fall asleep to the background noise. At least that’s what I do these days - I always thought I needed complete silence to fall asleep, but apparently that’s not the absolute case. What was the last thing you used scissors for? I opened a sachet of 3-in-1 coffee.

Have you ever used some kind of food as a facial mask? Nah I always just use Korean sheet masks. How many USB cords do you have lying around? I personally don’t have any but I do have a hard drive. Are you satisfied with your social life (or lack thereof)? I’m very satisfied with it and I’m glad I got to open up in college. Do you know anybody whose initials spell something? Sure. What is your favourite flavour of Kool-Aid? I’ve never had Kool-Aid. Is there a specific food you think NEEDS to be at Christmas dinner? My grandma’s steak. Would you be able to re-string a guitar? I wouldn’t even know where to buy guitar strings. What TV show do you just assume you wouldn't like? How I Met Your Mother, just because their fans love to make fun of and compare their oh-so-great show to Friends so much when I’ve never seen a single Friends fan make fun of HIMYM like ????? Why the one-sided, unsolicited hate??? I was always planning to watch the show and appreciate Friends and HIMYM at the same time but because the fans are so pathetic I just stopped wanting to watch it altogether. Do your friends have more money than you? Seems unfair to pit ourselves against one another when we’re all still depending on our parents’ money lmao. Who always has the power to make you feel intimidated? Ate Frances has always had a very strong personality. Do you have more bread or cheese in your house? Bread. What was the last movie trailer you saw? Not sure. I don’t really like trailers since most of them give away too much of the plots already. Did you purchase any meat product when you were at the store last? My dad did. Have you ever been told that you have chubby cheeks? Well I don’t, so no I’m not usually told this lol. Do you know how to properly use a saw? Nope. Isn't it a shame that what Kanye West did at the VMA's overshadowed what was supposed to be a night dedicated to Michael Jackson? Hahahaha not really, I found it hilarious and so so stupid. There were a billion other tributes to MJ that year that went smoothly so it doesn’t really matter to me if the 2009 VMAs will always be known as the Imma-let-you-finish VMAs.

[meepmorpperaltiago]

Intertwined, part 2

Aka an extension of the pop star AU that I’ve been way too obsessed with for way too long! You don’t need to have read the other fic set in this ‘verse to understand this fic, it’s a standalone thing. Thanks so much to @397bartonstreet and @jake-and-ames for all your help with this fic! 

He sees that she’s shaking a little as she leaves. He takes her hand, runs his fingers over her rings.

He says softly “You don’t have to do this”.

“I know”, she says in response. “But it’ll be good to get everything out there”.

He nods. “Ok, as long as you’re sure”, he says, kissing the top of her head.

“I love you”

“I love you too”

 When I meet Amy Santiago in a four-star Brooklyn hotel, she’s a far cry from both the fresh faced, bright eyed 15-year old I first spoke to at the ’98 Popfest and the troubled megastar whose life was crumbling around her around a decade ago. There’s a new wisdom in her eyes, but there’s also a sense of calm and stability that’s clearly come about since her darkest days. 

She’s surprisingly humble compared to most people with her level of fame, handing me a coffee before we even sit down and then momentarily panicking when she considers that I might’ve preferred tea.

But she’s also unsurprisingly guarded, responding to my casual question of if she lives close to this area with an almost sarcastic glare. It’s a look that says “come on, you know my life, why would you ask me that?”.

In hindsight it was a pretty stupid thing to say. From the time when she first burst onto the scene to become the biggest selling teenage artist ever in only 2 years, the amount of scrutiny into her life so suddenly and so young must’ve been overwhelming.

“It was a really crazy time and for a while it was incredible”, she says with a hint of nostalgia in her voice, “but it was so so overwhelming and I never had any time to just breathe, y’know?”

When I ask tentatively if that was the real root of her later troubles, she silently nods.

 “I have a confession to make”, he says with a smile, as if a joke is forming on his lips. She grins back at him, inviting him to say whatever it is he’s thinking.

“You were my first ever concert”

“No way”, she says, her hand flying to her mouth dramatically as her grin grows to match his.

“Yeah way - don’t tell Gina I told you this but she was obsessed with you, we went to your shows in matching T shirts, we had different ones for each album”

“Awww, babe that’s so cute”

 For the next seven years it seemed like the undisputed Princess of Pop could do no wrong as she brought out three more critically lauded and record-breaking albums and sold out corresponding tours within minutes. Rather than dropping off like many of her contemporaries, she also grew as an artist, transitioning from cutesy bubble-gum pop of her debut album Amy and follow up Dulce into the more grown up sounding, R n B infused dance pop of Fascination and then into the pop punk and guitar sounds of My Lullaby and Our Song.

But from what she says, things weren’t so perfect behind the scenes.

“I was lonely; I didn’t get to just be a normal kid, I didn’t have any real friends, I didn’t feel like I could trust or turn to anyone. And my whole life other than my music was controlled by my management and even then every song I wrote had to be vetted. And over time I started to get really depressed”

She sighs then, looking down, as if preparing herself for the next topic of conversation.

“And”, she says slowly, “that’s when the drinking and the drugs started. That was my medicine”

 “Ames, are you sure you’re ok?”, he asks as they sit in Shaws.

“Yeah”, she says, looking away from him. But he knows her too well.

“Do you wanna just go home and watch a movie? I’m sure everyone will get it”

She smiles then, takes his hand and they leave together. The warmth of his hand in hers doesn’t take away or fix her demons, but the love she feels for him does drown them out on nights like this.

 “I kept it under control for a while and no one knew. But then as it got worse, it started to get to the tabloids. And then Vegas happened”

She was of course referring to the infamous incident that triggered the start of her fall from grace in 2008. The crazy vacation and a drunken fling leading to a marriage that was officially annulled within 24 hours was what turned the previous buzz of press around her constantly into a storm. The man, a failed musician named Constantine Kane, selling his story to every paper he could find for a very tidy sum also didn’t help.                    

“I guess that was the point where they figured out how lucrative it was when I messed up”, she comments, a sarcastic tone thinly veiling wounds that are clearly still present.

“After that, they were everywhere”

 He doesn’t understand why they’ve suddenly stopped. Why Amy is looking around so nervously. Until he sees and hears them. There are 2 cars, both with different photographers speeding up behind them. His heart drops at the fear in Amy’s eyes as they race away.

She brushes it off, but later, when they’re back in his apartment, he can tell there’s something on her mind.

“Ames, are you ok?”, he asks, wanting to make whatever’s upset her better. She sighs and then says:

“I think we need to talk about what happened today. Things like that are scary, but they’re something I’ve gotten used to, I’ve been in that world for a really long time. But being with me… it means you’ll probably have to deal with shit like that too… and that’s not fair on you. Are you sure you want that? Because you could just walk away from all this now and you’d be fine-”

“Amy”, he interrupts, taking her hand. “I’d deal with all of that every day for like 100 years if it means I get to be with you. This is special. And I’m not giving up on us just because of some shitty papparazos.”

She smiles and laughs a little at that and kisses him and he’s never been so sure of anything in his life. He knows in that moment that he’ll be with her no matter what.

 After we bring up Vegas and the press intrusion that followed, strangely enough she seems to zone out for a second and smile a little, as if she’s fondly remembering something. Then she comes back from whatever she was thinking of and we move on with the conversation.

Not wanting to upset her too much, I let her drive the conversation on the rest of her breakdown – the increasing stories of her crazy parties, the infamous incident where she hit a photographer with her car after he jumped in front, the lawsuit that followed in spite of the man being completely unscathed, her fines for drink driving and the crazy braids that started to appear in her hair. Then the climax of it all, for want of a more appropriate term: when she barricaded herself in her bedroom for over 24 hours in the lead up to the Grammys, where she was eventually forced to perform after her management broke down the door. She snuck out of the awards show afterwards and eventually collapsed from alcohol poisoning. I can tell that she’s holding back tears when she answers my next question: what happened?

“It just felt like everything was spiralling so far out of control and it just kept getting crazier and crazier and as things got worse, all I did was drink more and do more of whatever substances I could find. And in the end, all I could do was shut myself off, by shutting myself in. And it happened so long ago, I shouldn’t still be crying over it…”  

I try to comfort her as best I can and ask her if she wants to continue the interview or scrap the whole thing.

“No, this is a story I need to get out. If I keep it all in and internalise it and never talk about it, it’ll be even worse.”, she responds, wiping the tears off her face. In the face of everything she’s been through, she has a remarkable strength.

What happened after that is something she’s kept pretty under wraps, but she tells me now, after taking a few minutes out.

“After I got out of hospital, I quit everything, I left my record label and went straight to rehab. Then, I wanted a fresh start, so I moved to New York and started therapy, which is where I met my husband.” She smiles as soon as she mentions him, looking down at her wedding and engagement rings. Although not many details of him or their relationship are public knowledge, other than the fact that he’s a cop from Brooklyn, he’s been assumed to be the subject of some of her most well-known love songs since she came back to music.

 “So, what are you in for?”, he asks jokingly. “Sorry, I use humour as a defence mechanism, it’s kind of my thing”.

“It’s ok,”, she says with a smile. “For me, it’s a heck of a lot of childhood issues, mostly typical child star stuff”

“Samsies!”, he responds, “Except my childhood issues aren’t to do with being famous and I’m also here ‘cause I got framed and went to jail, I’m a cop, it’s a whole thing – but almost samsies”

They hi five at that and both smile. The therapist calls him in and before he leaves, he turns around.

“Hey, I’ll see you later, right?”

“Sure”, she responds.

 “After we met in therapy, we started hanging out a lot and after about a month we started dating and eventually we got married. I honestly don’t know where I’d be without him. When I was at my lowest point, he was there to make everything better, and I’ve never felt happier or safer than I do with him”

“I’d also been writing music the whole time and eventually I set up Brooklyn Records, so I could release new music on my own terms and support new artists. I still have struggles – things like addiction and depression don’t’ just go away. But I’m ok now and as I’ve already said, I have an amazing family to support me now”

When I comment on the success of both her label and the five new albums she’s released since her comeback in 2011, she smiles fondly. It seems clear that in spite of all the bumps in the road and how much time has passed since her debut, I’m talking to a pop star still very much in her prime.

 “How was everything?”, he asks when she gets home.

“It was great”, she says as she hugs him.

“Did you mention me?”, he says jokingly.

“Actually, I did”

He looks at her softly, before turning serious with genuine concern. “Aww, babe – but seriously, are you ok?”

“Yeah. I’ve never been better”, she responds. And she truly means it.  

[girl-in-the-library]

My official review of Green Day’s “Father of All Motherf*ckers” after I’ve spent the last week listening to it.

the InMy initial impressions of the album after listening to it one time last Friday can be found here and here is my long post on the day the first song dropped in September.

New discussion under the cut.

This is what I wrote to my friends after hearing the album once or twice: Overall, I like the sound of the album. I enjoyed listening to it, and some of the songs have good lyrics. Other songs aren't all that inspired, but I don't think any of them are particularly bad. The album is mostly just that...it's fine. It sounds like Green Day, it's enjoyable, but overall it's forgettable. There are no stand out songs except the titular single that was played on the radio, and having heard that before made it so it didn't stand out as much on the album. I'd probably give the album itself a 7/10 rating. 

New Impressions: I like the album a lot more the more and more I listen to it. I think I would still give the overall album rating a 7/10 - because even as I personally like it more and more, I do still think, for the most part, the songs album as an album is forgettable and there are no truly standout songs in the way that something jumps out at you and wows you. Upon actually listening, however, I think there are two standout songs, which I personally really enjoy. Those are “Stab you in the heart,” and “Take the money and crawl.” 

“Father of all...” is fine. I didn’t like it at first because it didn’t sound enough like Green Day, but now I recognize it as a pretty standard song. Same thing with “Oh yeah!” Pretty much it’s just like...yeah, I like the radio singles. I’m glad to hear Green Day on the radio. But I’m not screaming with joy.

“I was a teenage teenager” is the most disappointing song on the album, in my opinion. I really liked the title, and I was looking forward to the song. I was hoping it would be something like a mocking look back at all the bullshit teens do from an adult perspective. But the lyrics are absolutely uninspired drek that sounds just like a song a teenager would write. And maybe it’s a commentary like I was looking for just by being that, but it falls flat as it comes across as sincere.

“Graffitia” sounds like it came right off of American Idiot, but in a good way. “Sugar Youth” sounds like it cam right off of American Idiot, but in a bad way.

I can’t remember anything about “Fire Ready Aim,” “Meet me on the roof,” or “Junkies on a high,” as I’m writing this. That’s probably not a good sign.

All in all, I really do enjoy the album, but it is WAY TOO FUCKING SHORT. It’s 26 minutes long. Unless they’re releasing a recut with more songs, I'm disappointed...and I’d be really disappointed if they’d do that...that video game DLC thing except in music form, even if I’d be thrilled with more content. But I’m getting over the disappointment of the length the more I listen to and enjoy the music itself.

WHAT I AM NOT GETTING OVER:

THE PROBLEMS I HAVE ARE WITH THE MARKETING AND THE DISCUSSION BY GREEN DAY SURROUNDING THE ALBUM. BJA keeps making comments about "the state of music today" and how they're bringing back real rock. He tweeted an absolutely awful ad (the tweet has since been deleted) which said "No swedish composers. No Trap Beats. No..." blahblahblah I don't remember but it was really bad. Not only is the idea behind "no trap beats" racist, going against Green Day's previous attempts at being anti-racist (whether they succeeded is another question) I would argue that even up through RevRad they were truly a "punk" band insofar as they at least attempted to walk the walk regarding anti-establishment and equitable ideals, even if to some extent they also are the (music) establishment. But with this there is literally nothing I can say to BJA other than "OK, Boomer." And I fucking hate it! Green Day is my favorite band and I am so disappointed in the context of this album. I don't know what this means for the future of the band and it almost reminds me of the episode BJA had at the 2012 iHeart Radio music festival. That's what this feels like to me, I guess, a rage-powered, privileged tantrum thrown by an old man who is trying to be cool but isn't. And I'm so, so disappointed by that. It makes me feel empty inside.

I am upset and disappointed by what’s going on in the background. It sucks when your heroes let you down. Though I did just learn that they are donating the sales from the single “Oh Yeah!” to the International Justice Mission and the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network...at least according to wikipedia...which makes me feel a bit more like my band is in there somewhere.

Green Day doesn’t owe me anything. I know that. I’m just a singular fan. And I’ve been a fan for so long that it seems like it’s become a part of my identity. I had to find a new favorite book after 5 years of it being Ender’s Game (from 2004-2009) because I refused to support OSC even in thought after finding out what an awful bigot he was. Green Day hasn’t really done anything like that, except for some ignorant comments that do seem more, well, ignorant than malicious. But if I continue to be disappointed...who will my favorite band be? It’s been 16 years. Green Day has been my favorite band more than half my life...so it /hurts/ to be so disappointed in them. 

I wasn’t even disappointed when I thought they had sort of written their last good album and were done when “Uno,” “Dos,” and “Tre” were so bad. I was sad, then, that I thought they were done, but I was like, “Thanks for all the music, I will always appreciate it.” I can still say that now, but it will be tainted by my personal disappointment, even if I am still musically pleased.

“Father of All Motherf*ckers” is a good album. It’s short, there’s nothing super stand-out about it, but it’s solid, and it’s fun. Green Day continues to be a good band. But that doesn’t stop me from being disappointed.

TL;DR: Album? Solid! 7/10 Drama? Bad! Disappointing! If you can 100% separate the art from the artist, and you like the band, you’ll love the album. If you are looking for something new in the genre to listen to, it’s definitely got some songs you’ll like and some you may think are “eh” or bad, regardless of if you like Green Day or not, but it’s worth a listen. And if you’re disappointed in the actions of BJA in particular...well, try not to let it taint a perfectly good album. I’ll try too.

But I’m still super hype for the concert

[carnistcervine]

Parasitic Raava AU

F-it. Everyone is posting their awesomeness. I’m just gonna go out and post this. I’ve been sitting on this AU for months. Only having the courage to write a one-shot for it for Halloween. And that was for an off-shoot of this AU! Yeah, the main AU actually isn’t about Zuko and Azula at all. That was just from a random idea I got listening to a song. xD I am working on an outline for an expansion of that idea called “Cain and Abel” but it’s heavily in the rough stages for now. ewe

The main AU just follows off canon Avatar lineage, and Vaatu doesn’t get to have any fun at all. D’: Poor Vaatu, rest in rigatoni.

Okay so the inspiration for this idea originally came from when I was listening to the song Control by halsey, and I started thinking about the avatar state. It made me start thinking about a darker interpretation of the relationship between Avatar and Avatar Spirit. Then I was looking at a TvTropes page about animalistic abominations, and I started thinking about ATLA, cause some of the spirits look like animals and then the thing mentioned that Raava and Vaatu look like flatworms and oh god the mental image, it burns! ;n; I liked it better when I thought they were carpets... But anyway, after that horrifying revelation, my brain came up with this idea- What if Raava(and by extension Vaatu) was a parasite? Like she's still (mostly) good, but it's a pretty heavy case of good is not nice.

-If I had to describe this AU badly, it would be ATLA meets Venom.

-Big note: I have not seen Korra yet, so this is almost all based on what is established as canon in ATLA. Not that it really matters, since I'm not exactly trying to be accurate to canon anyway. :'D

-One note I should make right here is that for Wan's story at least, since it takes place in an era around the beginning of bending and benders, there is no four nations yet. There are four definitive elements, and four main divisions of people. Also because this is basically before/at the very beginning of the bending age, people aren't really benders, they have been gifted with the power to control the elements, but they're still learning to properly use said powers. So instead of benders, they are known as tide-pushers, earth-shifters, fire-makers, and cloud-sitters. The water tribes are broken up along many islands, swamps and the north and south poles. Instead of an Earth Kingdom, there's the Earth Continent which is made up of many cities and kingdoms and tribes; The Mountain Kingdom, the Sand Tribes, The Great City of the Steppe, etc... What will be known in the future as the Fire Nation is known as the Volcanic Archipelago, which contains many cities and tribes. The biggest and most prosperous city is Dragon City, this is where Wan is originally from. The people of the air are a majority nomadic people, but they do have a temple up in the clouds known as the Cloud Sanctuary.

-So Raava is still the spirit of light and peace, but I'm thinking that either she and Vaatu are two halves of a whole who cannot exist independently, or something happens to her and Vaatu that causes them to be unable to exist independently of a mortal form. But either way, Vaatu has been sealed away, and only Raava roams free.

-Another idea that I got is that both Raava and Vaatu were originally sealed away due to being parasitic spirits, but Raava's seal was broken and she was released into the world. This idea would play into why no one lives in the lost wilds, as it's said that a "dangerous being" lurks there.

-Wan is an ordinary fire-maker who lives out in the lost wilds after being exiled from his home. He lives a fairly quiet life, mostly trying to avoid the creepy spirits and monsters that lurk in the lands around him. His time is peaceful until he starts to come across the withered carcasses of animals.

-The corpses are all rail thin, ribs showing, eyes milky white and sunken in, bleeding from the nose and mouth. Other than that, there is no clear cause of death, no mortal injury, or even bite wounds to indicate infection, they all just look like they withered away and died. Like something had come and drained the vitality from them.

-Wan is gathering tinder one day when he comes across a strange sight. A polarbear dog wandering about. His first thought is wondering how one of those got this far north, then he noticed just how thin the creature was. The beast was facing away from him, it looked horribly thin and gave ghastly groans, like it was in horrible pain. As much as Wan was curious as to the cause of the mysterious deaths, at the same time he didn't want to suffer the same fate. He prepares to back away when the creature senses his presence. It stops and looks over it's shoulder, blazing white eyes gazing into his soul.

-Officially freaked out, Wan makes a run for it. He can hear the labored breathing of the creature bounding behind him. He briefly wonders if some kind of animal jiang shi is chasing him down. His thoughts are interrupted when the beast tackles him. Wan tries to push the beast off of him, but as soon as he hits the ground he feels a horrible stabbing pain. Not physical pain however, a strange spiritual pain, like something is drilling it's way into his very soul. Something seems to be worming it's way into his mind. The beast flips him onto his back and gazes deep into his eyes. Under the blank, burning gaze the bear-dog seems to be begging for Wan to help it. As he makes this revelation he starts to hear a faint feminine voice in his head.

-The voice attempts to soothe Wan. It tells him to relax, that it will all be over soon. The presence invading him had a strangely peaceful aura, like it was a graceful and soothing presence, but at the same time it was forcing it's way into his body. And he quickly figured that this thing was likely what was causing all those animals to die.

-Not wanting to suffer such a fate himself, Wan fights back against the spirit invading him. However, he realizes very quickly that this is a loosing battle. The deeper the spirit digs into him, the more Wan feels his thoughts loose clarity, like a warm blanket is enveloping his mind.

-Suddenly a harsh blast of air forces the bear-dog off of him. Someone rushes in to wrangle or fight the polarbear dog, despite the fact that he's still reeling from the feeling of something worming it's way deeper and deeper into his very being, Wan attempts to stand and warn the stranger of the situation. He weakly calls out to them to beware, but soon passes out from the pain.

-When Wan comes to, he's burning up with a fever. His spirit feels heavy and there's a soft feminine voice in his head cooing soothing things at him. Trying to lull him into a sense of security and comfort so that she or it can take over. Or so he assumes at least. Outside of his head, he can hear two people talking about him.

-When Ami and Onu went out to look for Ami's beloved polarbear dog, Taki, they did not expect to find the ursine-canine in such a state, and they expected to find a sickly fire-maker even less.

-Seeing Taki assaulting someone, Onu took immediate action and sent a blast of wind to knock the beast off of the man. Onu rushed in an attempt to calm Taki, he paused when he saw just how bad Taki looked. The polarbear-dog was starved thin, eyes milky-white and sunken in, and bleeding heavily from the mouth and nose despite no apparent injuries. He could only utter her name softly as the bear-dog fell to the ground, having reached the end of her strength.

-With Onu going after Taki, Ami rushed over the felled man's side. He attempted to sit up, moaning something about danger before immediately collapsing back onto the ground. He's very pale and burning up with fever. Her worries are only compounded when she cannot get the man to open his eyes or respond in any coherent manor.

-Of course Ami's day was only about to get much worse. She glaces over at Onu and sees the state Taki is in. Ami's heart shatters into thousands of pieces seeing her beloved companion in such a state.

-Using the moisture of her tears, Ami examine Taki's chi paths. Unfortunately Taki's chi had been drained, and her chi paths had been withered and burned through. There was no saving her. Despite this, Ami insists on trying to save Taki. Onu helps her drag both Taki and the strange man back to their base camp.

-Taki passes away soon before the man starts to regain consciousness. As heartbroken as Ami is, she focuses her energies on reading the chi of the mysterious man. She isn't sure what's causing the fever, as he lacks any signs of infection. She realizes that he's a fire-maker, and his inner fire is blazing out of control which is causing the fever. But why?

-The man, Wan, as Ami soon learns, weakly cries out about something draining the life out of the living, and how it's infested him. Ami assumes that it's just the fever talking, as by all means he should be fine. Aside from the fever, there's nothing wrong with Wan.

-Neither Ami, nor Onu know why Wan is ill, nor can they explain the mysterious death of not only Taki, but the other mysterious corpses they found in the Lost Wilds. However, they figure it best to take him away from this place. They opt to take him to the Southern Island Tribe to see a proper healer.

-They do eventually make it to the Southern Island Tribe and see a healer. The healer, a grizzled elder, tells Ami and Onu that Wan's fever is not natural, it is a spirit fever caused by the battle between his own spirit and one invading his being. Wan is deeply concerned, remembering the bodies he found back in the Lost Wilds, but the elder healer tells him that she can find no evidence of his chi being stolen or damaged.

-Wan wishes to purge Raava from his being, so Onu takes the group to see the elder monks at the Cloud Sanctuary.

-On the way there, the trio is attacked by a group of dangerous rogues. Seeing his new friends in danger, and being too weak to do anything about it, Wan reluctantly gives Raava control. Using Wan's body, Raava wipes the floor with the goons. Wan collapses afterwords because channeling that much energy is exhausting. It's at this point that Ami finally believes that Wan is actually possessed and not just loopy from fever. Both Onu and Ami are very impressed by the show of strength however.

-Continuing on the journey to the Cloud Sanctuary, the trio comes across a village that has been ransacked by pirates and subsequently torn apart by seemingly malevolent spirits. Ami and Onu want to move on, but Wan insists that they help the people. He tries to help, but he doesn't really know what to do. Reluctantly, he asks Raava to help him.

Okay so some more generalized notes about the AU~ -At first Wan is completely opposed to sharing his body with Raava. However, after some time he starts to work with her and learns to live with her.

-Not that Raava has any intention of giving up her host.

-After Raava infests him, Wan starts to manipulate all of the elements. At first it's just while Raava is in control, but slowly he starts to use other elements without Raava's influence. Also, he does notice a connection to all four elements right away, he just isn't sure what to think of it until it manifests into manipulation of all four elements.

-At first Raava is only motivated by the need to sustain herself. Being one of the greater spirits, she doesn't concern herself with mortal matters. However, the more time she spends with Wan, the more she learns to see the forest for the trees and empathize with the struggles of mortal beings.

-Dragon City is ruled by a gang of ruthless thugs who hoard wealth, food, resources, and rule the populace with an iron fist. The leader of this gang is the Dragon King, Ryuusei. Sure enough, Wan and Raava eventually take this asshole out.

-There needs to be a pirates arc where someone is kidnapped and Wan has to work with Raava to save them. If I don't write this, then what's the fucking point?

-Ami is a caring, but skeptical tide-pusher, and Onu is basically the stoner friend cloud-sitter.

-Raava calls Wan her Avatar, and eventually the name sticks.

-As time goes on, Wan and Raava's spirits become fully fused together. This makes Wan part spirit, and Raava part human. Of course, Wan is mortal and eventually dies a natural death, but because Raava is eternal, she is reborn into another body and such starts the avatar cycle.

-By the time that Wan passes away, the whole Raava is a parasitic spirit and the Avatar is actually possessed fades from the public consciousness and even the Avatars eventually forget that Raava is actually a parasite. Hell they soon forget her name and identity entirely, only knowing her as the "Avatar Spirit".

-In this AU, Raava is an incomplete being. As such she cannot sustain herself, she must attach to a mortal being to live among the mortal realm. And being half of the world's spirit, if she were to leave the mortal realm, the world would fall into chaos and eventually die. So she initially tries to sustain herself by fusing with plants and animals. Neither work, as her spirit is too strong for them, which causes their own spirits to burn up and their bodies to wither away. Wan is the first human and compatible being Raava attempts to fuse with. His human spirit is strong enough to withstand Raava's own spirit without being destroyed.

-As for Raava's characterization, I'd probably describe her as being a combo of good is not nice and well-intentioned extremist. Being a spirit of light and peace, she radiates a peaceful aura that she uses to soothe her host to make them reject her less. Or before she started possessing people, she'd use it so that her potential victims would be lulled into a false sense of security so she can latch onto them. She acts nice, again using her peaceful aura and gentle voice to soothe her victims. I'd hesitate to actually call her nice because she does casually ignore the independence and self-determination of her host. Well-intentioned or not, she is a parasite after all. And no, she doesn't feel bad about it. Bigger picture- Raava fades, the world dies. Raava's host dies, nothing particularly bad happens.

-Raava can be pretty vicious too tho. If kind words and manipulation, err I mean, gentle persuasion don't work, she's gets to be mean as hell. :D Even to the point of forcibly taking control and asking her host if they really think they're in control.

-Vaatu? He's just a straight up dick. Okay, fine, he pretends to be on your side while poisoning your mind and turning you against everyone that cares about you. Why? He thinks it's funny. And yeah, he's pretty much just straight up evil. He isn't above driving his host into madness and using them as a means to cause as much mayhem as possible. But he does so subtly, and works as insidiously as possible. I also kind of picture him as being the type that messes with your head by making you re-examine the very definitions of good and evil.

-Or maybe he does have some good in him. But you'd have better luck getting a polarbear-dog to speak perfect common tongue than getting any good out of Vaatu.