#but what he could've been haunts me
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hello I’d love to hear about natsu. do you have any thoughts abt what he was like before we (and lucy) meet him in fairy tail? like with growing up in the guild and all that
You were the first one in here but I literally had to let your ask marinate in my head longer to answer it properly lol.
So we don't know much about Natsu's childhood, whether it be pre-guild with Igneel or pre- main story when he joined the guild apart from a spare handful of moments and facts, these being:
Makarov was evidently the one to find him.
That god forsaken scene of the others laughin at him for not being able to read.
His moments with Gildarts as a kid
Macao being a teacher to him at some point who taught him to use his fire other than to burn things ( hello Natsu vs Erigor )
Finding and raising Happy with his bestie Lisanna
He never officially formed a team with anyone in the guild before the main story.
I think I might be missing a spare few but you get the idea.
For a main character we know scarcely little about him. His thoughts, his views. Zero. Which honestly for such a long running series is so odd to not even get a peek at what's goin on in his head.
There's nothing absolutely solid about his past that we can get to use to dig into his head. Save for the fact that he loves his friends and his family.
Across the board for a lot of his moments in his past we know he's got a lotta love to give. He loves his Dad, he loves Happy, he loves his guild. But just because you have something doesn't mean you know how to work with it.
He loves Igneel. Igneel disappeared. And that forced him into a denial of his dad being dead so strong that up until present in the main story he still desperately searches for him even when the other slayers had accepted it. ( And i'm almost sure he got laughed at for over the years. Can you imagine? Saying your looking for a dragon in a dragonless world?)
He loves his friends. But I think after that damning moment (which honestly I think is a moment really early is his joining the guild. Like he hadn't gotten to know em 100% yet) of them laughing at him he clams up about certain things.
Any moment of vulnerability he could have with them down the line is tossed out to avoid something like that happening down the line.
Lisanna (lisanna, lisanna ilu. I should draw u more.) was a blessing in that she was working on getting those walls down and she was close! Then her incident happened and he clammed up again even fucking harder than before!
Man this is such a long winded way to answer your question but I think growing up in the guild for Natsu, I think as much as he loves everyone- and he does! He loves em all! Even the mfers who piss him off sometimes- I think even though he was there with everyone he didn't feel as though he could open up (or well risk opening up tbh) to them. So he played along to make things in general easier going forward. (Whether intentional or not is up in the air)
So whatever perceptions everyone had of him he rolled with it. He's a lil bit dumb, he's loud, he's inattentive, etc. He doesn't deny what's said about him. Hell he might even play it up. He just doesn't do anything to break the perception as time went on. And since no one really dug like Lisanna did there was no reason to break it.
So he grew up in the guild as the happy go lucky loner. Nothin more and supposedly, nothing less.
#fairy tail#talking to the firebird#bro.....#bro just listen to me man#i KNOW what natsu's meant to be#he is supposed to be ur average happy action anime protag#i know this so badly#but what he could've been haunts me#bcus what little is known about him plus his actions at times dont match up to what others in universe say about him#its interestin to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee#plus what i said about him bein there with everyone but no one rlly lookin deeper into him#thats not a dig at the other characters!#everyones got their baggage at issues so them not lookin closer to him when he seems fine while their dealin with their own things is neat!#cause friends aint gonna know every heartache bout each other alotta times and the same with family!#u can be there with ppl u love and not know how to open up!#which i think wouldve been a super cool character flaw for natsu to have bcus he cares and tries to help in his own ways but simultaneously#REFUSES to open up about himself and how he feels and still keeps himself at a distance from everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#its interesting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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i think the thing that really gets me about all the "we've got to kill this guy kabru" meme redraws with mithrun is that in the very first conversation mithrun has with laios, he trusts him with, essentially the fate of the world and his life long revenge quest against the demon
#dungeon meshi#mithrun#laios touden#i just think is neat really.#like in a way. laios is entrusted with what has haunted both kabru and mithrun for a significant portion of their lives#actually i think its. pretty interesting how trusting mithrun tends to be. while he says outright that he knows kabru is plotting something#he lets him go and execute his plan to start with..think its only until kabru says hes going to go get the shadow lord's help that mithrun#is like 'yeah okay thats not going to work im going to go ahead with mine'#is just really interesting to me. how he gives people chances where others wouldn't. bcs im sure any other canary captain wouldn't#not that its not deserved but the demon benefits so much from people seeing the canaries as this unreasonable unforgiving threat#also it was absolutely to the winged lions benefit that marcille become the dungeon lord- even if it liked laios more marcille was more#vulnerable to his manipulation and brainwashing#i think laios could've been reasoned with before becoming the dungeon lord but marcille couldn't#dungeon meshi spoilers#went back to these tags after looking again and you know i think mithrun let kabru talk with the shadow lord so kabru would not interfere#with what he told the rest of the canaries to do#my post
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#red vs blue#rvb#locus#felix#sam ortez#isaac gates#felix mcscouty#lolix#mine#*24#art#rvb19 spoilers#just to be safe ig?#i love how even no one in the mercs discord rly knows what the hell was up with the random felix 'cameo' in restoration lol. we're all just#'idk man. maybe it's charon maybe sigma just used him as a base. who knows.'#its kinda hard to even make it into a merc plot point bc the reason WHY he's even there is non-existent. if epsilon didn't namedrop him#i wouldn't even have noticed tbh. like yeah his armor has felix's colors but that also could've just been sigma/omega mix too y'know#ofc tucker's relationship w/ felix can't be discounted reg. meta and epsilon and betrayal of trust etc. idk maybe i'll expand on this later#like maybe felix is in there bc tucker felt very betrayed by epsilon and felix to tucker is the embodiment of betrayal so meta = felix?#BUT i do like ghost felix haunting shit. even if it's not actually him but like a narrative/traumatic thing#he said you'll never get rid of me what i did to you will always linger <3#i do have some thoughts abt... Everything and the concept of haunting. wash's 'ghosts' and the guilt. meta wanting to destroy epsilon/the#past to be free. resentment of the past. nostalgia for it. the guilt of survival. moving on as a complete severing vs carrying it w/ you.#ok i'll stop rambling now lol#this didnt turn out exactly how i envisioned but i dont wanna work on it anymore and its not bad or anything so
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I imagine Jason didn't fully really see Dick as his brother, that was more like a distant figure. Nightwing who's a hero and very cool and sometimes tells him he's doing a good job. Like? Augh. Putting this into words
He never truly yearned or hoped for Dick to hang out more, to be his brother, to take him on trips in and out of uniform. Like he thought about it, but it just. Didn't seem the realm of possibility. Dick was cool, he liked him, he would've loved to hang out with him more. But the idea having an actual proper relationship never really fully crossed him. He didn't agonise over Dick not being a brother because it just. Didn't come to mind, it didn't seem a possibility, it just wasn't a thing. Why would he expect Dick to be a brother to him, why would he ever expect Dick to hang out with him more
#and OBVIOUSLY when tim comes by jason is like hey. what the fuck.#nightwing could've been my BROTHER? we couldve hung out :(? how come he didn't :(#i dunno it just. there's an extra hit to it yknow? different fun thing where instead of being a distant brother#jason just fully never comprehended he could've been#i dont mean this in a set up for ship way to be clear#i mean it in a. god thinking about dick and tims closer relationship and jasons nonexistent one devastates me all the time for forever#jason is the character i place in the cold snow outside to look into a bright window with a happy and warm family but cannot enter#<- thats not fully related to this specificpost i guess. but man. short stories you read in elementary school thag haunt you for forever hu#uh#jason todd#for filtering rly#brothers in blood where jason sent the note saying we wanted to be family :(
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fellas it has been three months since the beach episode and thinking about neil and eva in any capacity still makes me ILL
#the beach episode came out right after i lost someone very dear to me so it hit extra hard#every line of dialogue in that final scene cut to my core#it's not even just neil's death for me#it's the way he pushed away his father and his friends and his literal soulmate in both a platonic and a romantic sense all his life#in order to avoid hurting them when he passed and in the process ended up hurting them way more bc if they'd been close#they'd at least have memories with him to look back on when they missed him and could find comfort in said memories#but bc he never let people get close to him he left his loved ones with nothing to remember him by except for the way he distanced himself#HE AND EVA COULD'VE LIVED A HAPPY LIFE TOGETHER#EVEN IF THEY DIDN'T END UP DATING THEY COULD'VE MADE BEAUTIFUL MEMORIES TOGETHER AND BEEN EVEN CLOSER IF HE HADN'T BEEN AN IDIOT#THEY. COULD'VE. HAD. THEIR. GARDEN.#and sure there's many messages meant to be taken away from their story and it was always meant to end tragically#but that doesn't mean i have to be content about it#PRESS ESC TO LEAVE???? WE DON'T TALK ABOUT THAT ENOUGH#idk man. would this have emotionally scarred me this much if i hadn't been (and still am ofc) grieving irl? maybe not.#but i was and we'll never know the answer to that question#what hurts more is i played all the other ttm games before my loved one died#and you know what one of my very last memories of him was?#him hanging out with our family in our living room while i showed my sister the first ttm game#so yeah i think these games are gonna haunt me forever. fun.#i mean i think they would've anyway#you can't play a game series with an overarching storyline this intricately woven and music this good and characters this complex#and then NOT think about it forever#anyway i like these games a lot#they impacted me more than any piece of fiction ever has and as someone whose whole personality revolves around stories that's saying A LOT#to the moon#ttm beach episode#rosawatts
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so for Writing Reasons I've been going back through all my old personal writing (including some very old social media posting) and the sheer force with which I wanted to dress up or roleplay "as a guy" from ages 12 to 15 is truly stunning. WHILE BEING AWARE OF TRANS AND NONBINARY PEOPLE. AS A OPTION. FULLY ZERO-BRAIN-CELL AWARENESS-ZERO ASS EGG
#im MAD#I went into this project thinking haha it's funny I was so secure in my gender as a kid#surely. SURELY. I will not find a simple TON of both public and private Indications#That Maybe#I Maybe Wanted To Be A He/Him#Or At Least Stop Wearing Fucking Dresses#I'm HAUNTED!! I've been compiling all of it over the past week and I keep finding MORE#thinking about that one video 'and none of you told me???? none of you told me I didn't have to be a girl??????'#from the writer's den#void talks#the worst fucking part about this project also is thinking. it could've been different.#it could all have been different.#the thoughts were THERE...#there are SO many instances where I wanted to be more masc or straight up cosplay men#I mean you can take a quick look at my roleplaying history and go ''wow void's played a lot of guys''#''void spent a lot of time from 8th to 10th grade roleplaying as guys''#''including sexually. huh.''#but basically every time I wanted to Try Something irl I just.........didn't................#part of it was anxiety#I was so anxious about it being weird or awkward#and being like 'I like feminine terms of reference and whatnot tho'#but aaaauuugghhhhhhhhh.#I want to shake my seventh-grade self's shoulders and say ''there will come a day when you realize gender is fake#and that you don't have to pretend to be a girl''#''and just because your desires aren't going to perfectly match what you think it means to be trans. TRUST ME''
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I can see some of y'all are deep in the colonial romance fantasies re silna 😒😒😒
#terrorposting#the thing about goodsir/silna is that it's good because it didn't happen#she doesn't love him like that. he's the man who (symbolically) killed her father he's her jailer he's the information leech worming#it's way into her vocabulary#he loves her like that of course. how could he not with the tales of native romances he's been spoon-fed. and she knows that he doesn't see#her as a Whole Unique Person. she's the arctic to him. she's the unyielding ice and wind that cuts at your skin and the beast haunting them#they're not made for each other it's not 'anything could've happened' - it's good because it didn't#there was clearly a draw and a connection there - but this show is EXCELLENT at illustrating how fuzzy the borderline between chemistry and#what people are truly capable of at their worst#can be#it's 'for all the love that could have been if we were both different. if the world was different. if we weren't here (but if we weren't#here we never could be)'#it's you are clearly bad for me but I cannot tear myself away#it's you bring me comfort but I wish you weren't here (I wish we both weren't here)#it's we're going through this awful thing together. despite it all despite what either of us wants we're in this together#it's not some fuckign. uwu THIS white man will treat her good. how can you say that after a single second of considering the sexualization#of native women#they're fascinating because of the situation not because it's some 'better' romance#some of y'all suck the nuance right outta things like a juice box I swear to GOD
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thinking about the spare springlock suit that michael gets trapped in in sl. what do you guys think it was :)
#worst options are some sort of spring bonnie or fredbear prototype. of course#like there definitely could've been more but ?? there's not really any hints as to what it was so i'm just inclined towards pain as well as#The Themes And Motifs Of It All you know DFJHDSFK#yes it was most likely just some random suit but to me that's just free real estate#spring bonnie 'they thought i was you' sins of the father following his call being doomed to never escape#OR fredbear and the GUILT of it all the inverse where he is now trapped and terrified evan Haunting The Narrative (the plush and cameras in#the private room!) as well as night 4 also being heavy on the michael and circus baby dynamic!#how could i possibly choose you know#just thinking about him escaping and seeing what it was. im normal#⁂ ・゚: i was looking for a job‚ and then i found a job‚ and heaven knows i’m miserable now ➛ ooc
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oh wait. Did i ever tell you guys about a scrapped kenix idea i had like over a year ago. i just called it waltz of death and well. I think you get the idea from just that
#it is exactly what it sounded like. at the times a dance with kenix was a Threat instead. like about 2 minutes of excruciating pain#as this stupid guy sings and dances and just has a good time. Whenever i depict kenix dancing that scrapped idea always Haunts Me#you agreed to a waltz with kenix! Oops You Have Died From Severe Blood Loss and Your Limbs Torn Off!#Sorrgy! Better luck next time! ^_^#now listen. It is interesting to take it into account if i ever depict kenix and ken dancing becaue Well Uhm#The Implications. What seemed to be a friendly invitation has actually been a graceful death from his hands all along#with how much hatred yet that. ?. ? . kenix holds for his other self. To him it could've been the best death he could offer#to someone that always been a reminder to him. A reminder of Well. You Know. ^_^ The Past#yomo ocs?!#kenix
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ᴄᴏᴜʀᴛɪɴɢ ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ
featuring: protective!heian!sukuna, kindhearted!servant!reader. slight angst/hurt -> comfort. synopsis: you're sick. to your surprise, you're rescued by the man second closest to death himself. masterlist
you should've known he wouldn't come. sukuna has never set foot in the servant's headquarters in his life, let alone to chase after a sick servant. you lower your head, trying to ease the headache that has plagued you through the day.
sukuna loves his bloodshed and his gore. him and death would be good friends, you think to yourself. he wouldn't care if your body was burnt or buried, you think to yourself; wouldn't care if you died at all.
the room the others put you in is empty. ash spreads neatly over the cold floor. the scent of kibble haunts the atmosphere. it's where they put the dogs before sukuna killed them.
ever since you took care of the king of curses while he was sick, the other servants had been careful in keeping a distance from you. not in ill of heart; they're simply terrified at what you must've done to survive in your week long stay with the monster. honestly, you don't blame them.
but now when you're laying on the freezing ground, struggling to breathe, it's hard not to.
'this is where you live?'
your eyes look up. shock. then, with all the strength you can muster, you heave yourself one step away from the man at the doorway, which only serves to piss him off more.
sukuna ryomen, in all his glory, looks down at you. bending down to pick you up like a limp doll to be seated against the wall, he seems to revel in his regained strength. you can't help but feel happy for him, to have survived this fatal disease. not many men can attest to that...
then again, he is no ordinary man.
'i asked you a question.'
you nod, a small thing, barely a movement. he seems to clench his teeth.
he takes off his long white coat, flaunting a layer of dried blood, and drapes it over your shoulders.
yet it doesn't end there. he retrieves from his pocket a bottle of what looks to be a golden syrup.
you know exactly what it is.
he takes your hand and wraps it around the flask, making you hold it, sparing, not one, but two of his eyes, to stare at you, making sure you do as he commands.
'swallow.'
you shake your head. you know he's asking you to do. this is a medication is so rare for your disease that no sorcerer has found in over a hundred years. he's brought this thing of myth right to your very lips. now he's asking you to drink it, and thus take away any chance of it saving anyone else's life.
you scowl, but the tickling sensation in your throat grows stronger, eventually erupting out of your mouth in a harsh cough. you look away from sukuna.
'leave,' you whisper, weakly. 'don't wanna infect you.'
'i survived the illness already. i've developed an immunity.'
you shake your head again. you couldn't threaten your king's health with your own weakness. you just couldn't.
'i can't take this.'
he growls. without any notice, he swallows your lips in a kiss. in the momentary haze, you could hardly resist, fisting the front of his kimono to ground yourself. then, you feel something sweet, honey-ish, hit your tongue.
with his hand locked on your chin, it forces you to swallow.
you pull back, pushing him away. he groans.
he wipes his mouth, still with two eyes staring.
no... no, why did he do that?
'y-you- how? no... why did you waste it on me?' you whisper, desperately searching his face for an answer. 'i'm just a servant. you could've given it to a princess, or a scholar, or priest-'
he grabs you by the arm and forces you into his arms. its heat astounds you, and you find yourself crawling closer. a vague thumping sound seems to press against your ear-
oh. you calm your breathing.
it's his heartbeat.
alive.
'sleep in my room tonight,' he demands.
what did he say? you strain your mind, trying to replay what he said earlier. no... maybe you heard correctly.
'but i'm no concubine,' you respond, instantly.
his arm supports your waist, helping you up effortlessly to your feet. he then directs two of his eyes to the doorway, his cadence low and domineering.
'it doesn't matter.'
he leads you placidly through the servant's quarters. you notice all conversation cease at your entry, bodies dropping into a low bow. a small voice in you whispers that it's where you should be too. you tug at sukuna's arm.
'i'm only a servant, sukuna.'
you know what it looks like, a servant clutching onto a man, more god than human. a man who has slaughtered villages, blood staining the base of his kimono crimson, and turned half a province on its head, just to save you.
'whatever you are in my eyes is what you are to the world,' he states, his expression unchanging. 'if i deem you a queen, that is who you are.'
exiting the servant compound, you know you can't say no- not like you wanted to. the wide expanse of his chest is comforting.
yet however sweet this feeling remains, you can't help but gulp. perhaps this is the closest a human has ever come to courting death.
#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna ryomen#jjk#jjk sukuna#jjk x reader#jujutsu sukuna#sukuna x reader#sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna#sukuna fluff#ryomen x reader#jjk fluff#sukuna angst
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Interesting reunions
Tim and Danny are twins, Danny was given up for adoption by the Drakes when he was a baby and Tim was never told he has a brother.
After a reveal gone bad, Danny, Jazz, Sam and Tucker became thieves after closing the portal. They mainly target supernatural or cursed items. Their target, a necklace, is being held in a museum with their in being a private event to show off the piece before it's sent back to its owner.
The heist would've gone well if Tim hadn't also been in attendance.
------
'Lmao and here I thought you didn't want to be here'
It was a text from Dick.
Not exactly the strangest thing to happen when Tim was forced to attend an event.
He'd been benched after a mission resulted in a minor concussion. He'd personally been planning on going over his paperwork for Wayne Enterprises, but apparently that wasn't 'rest', instead he was sent off to be bored out of his mind at some art function. He didn't have time to prepare notes or even do any real research. But he still had Dick who had apparently been dragged along as his babysitter (And was fortunately interested in the items on display)
They'd been texting throughout the night. Dick fed him enough information to be mildly interested in topics of conversation, and when that failed the strange history of the main display. An old necklace that supposedly was connected to a string of deaths and all around misfortune.
So no, the text wasn't strange, but what was, was the photo attached. It was a picture of a man, grinning and chatting amicably with a woman whom he could barely make out as the collection's curator. His hair was longer than Tim's, tied neatly back to be clear of his glasses and to give clear view of the man's face.
Tim's face.
There was a clone at the event.
'can u get me another pic?'
Tim was now significantly more interested. Tim could identify the room they were in, housing the main display and it was about two rooms over from where he was currently hiding out. He could get there easily enough.
Dick sent him a thumbs up before replying with another, distinctly more uncomfortable photo of the man. He smiled awkwardly and Tim could finally get a better look at his face. Tim's brows scrunched together. A lichtenburg scar stretched up from beneath his collar and trailed along his jaw and in the light the man's eyes almost looked green.
He ran the photo through his facial recognition software, getting at least a few pings on himself before finally landing on Jonas Spencer, private security currently assigned to shadow one Morgan Deveraux. His history was solid, highschool records, even a spotty criminal history (points where he'd almost been arrested for bar fights) before he'd joined up with his firm.
So. not a clone. Probably.
Tim would still need to check it out. He pushed past a dark haired woman and entered the main show room. Dick, luckily had kept him in conversation but Jonas looked flighty, his eyes always drifting back to his charge.
Then he caught sight of Tim.
He froze. Staring at Tim for a moment before he tapped his ear- and what Tim assumed to be a comm. He made a move for Morgan, leaving Dick in the dust.
The lights flickered. Jonas reached for Megan, his hand wrapping around hers. Tim could've sworn his eyes darted upwards. Then there was a complete blackout. There was a clatter as a vent grate fell to the floor, shouts arose from the attendees.
Then the lights flickered back to life.
Jonas and Morgan had vanished, and so did the necklace as well as three other paintings.
Good news, its not a clone. Bad news, he might have a twin brother who is in a gang of thieves.
--
Daniel Fenton, or as his ID currently stated 'Jonas Spencer', wouldn't exactly call himself a thief- personally he was more of a collector. Or a curator, whatever the hell you might call a guy who grabs haunted and or cursed objects and dumps them in an alternate dimension.
And it wasn't exactly like he was normally the one stealing things either! That was mostly Sam, he'd done for a bit when they'd first started up (pushing his hands through the glass and taking a necklace with him, or making a painting completely invisible as he whisked it away) but then Sam started calling it 'cheating' and claimed 'his technique was lacking' and promptly took over his position.
(He didn't exactly mind, using his powers too often made his skin crawl. He may not have the GIW constantly hunting him, but he'd had enough run ins to make him sweat. He also didn't want to think about his parents.)
So maybe their entire deal wasn't completely altruistic. When you've been on the run since seventeen and had decided that you, your best friends and your older sister are going to become international thieves, sometimes you have to steal things so that you can have an income. And sometimes stealing is fun.
Unluckily their current job wasn't recreational. They'd heard word of a haunted necklace, there was a string of bad luck connected to it. Mirrors shattering, injuries popping up only days after interacting with the piece, lights falling out from the ceiling. There'd also been a case of near death.
Very clearly the latest display piece was cursed meaning they needed to grab it before it was shipped back into it private collection in France. That meant a time crunch, meaning they wouldn't be fully prepared. It was fine- they'd stolen the dagger of Amon Ra when they had half a day to plan, so three should've been fine.
He and Jazz manned the floor, Jazz kept to grifting while Danny worked as support if things went sideways on any front. Jazz, currently wealthy socialite 'Morgan Devereaux', draped an arm around a politician as he guided her through the collection. Jazz shot him a glance telling him to stay back, keep monitoring the main floor with the necklace.
That was fine. He could do that. He approached the curator and complimented the piece, letting her tell him about the struggles she had getting it overseas let alone her conversations with the owner. Ok, so definitely cursed.
Danny felt eyes on his back, and from the corner of his eye he saw someone take a photo. Tall, dark hair and a bright smile.
Sam pointed out that it was a Wayne.
At that point Danny made an attempt to leave, if he was going to get into a fight we wasn't going to do it there. He'd be too close to the necklace for Sam to get in and grab it without attention being drawn to her too. But Grayson cornered him impressively fast. He asked Danny for a photo, claiming that he looked just like his brother. Danny relented.
Then Tucker chimed in that someone had ran his face. Fuck. Dick kept him in conversation but Danny was eyeing their escape roots. Sam warned that another was coming through the left entrance and that she'd already lifted his phone. Danny turned, preparing himself for confrontation.
Then Danny saw him, his doppelganger.
Grayson hadn't been lying. That thought was terrifying.
Danny sent two taps into his earpiece and made his way towards Jazz. They couldn't risk staying any longer. Danny didn't know if they'd been made or not but he wasn't taking chances. He nodded to Sam who went for the jewels as Tucker cut the lights. Jazz and Danny took a painting each.
Sam went for the vents and Danny and Jazz disappeared through the front door.
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𝐡𝐚𝐮𝐧𝐭 𝐦𝐞— gojo satoru
pairing: gojo satoru x reader summary: even after you leave the jujutsu world behind, gojo satoru finds himself unable to get over you. genre: fluff! some angst but happy ending, friends to lovers notes: inspired by the song "haunt me (x3)" by teen suicide, gojo is awful at realizing his own feelings and dealing with them wc: ~4.8k
the day that you leave tokyo jujutsu tech is a dull one.
gojo think this must've been months in the planning, especially considering the fact that you're standing with nothing but a backpack slung over your shoulder with the rest of your belongings nowhere to be seen.
(he later learns that they had already been moved to your new apartment, and nanami and shoko had helped you move out over the course of a month.)
he also discovers that he's the only one that hasn't been informed of your departure, especially since he seems to be the only one taken by surprise as you stand by the entrance and say your goodbyes. he wonders if it's his fault for taking so many missions after geto's defection, and he feels his stomach lurch uncomfortably when he realizes that he's been so distracted that he once again couldn't see something happening with one of his friends.
and now you're leaving.
"you have to promise to visit," shoko says, engulfing you in a tight hug. gojo feels his mouth run dry at the sight, and he can't help but feel panicked when you give shoko a soft grin.
"i'll certainly do my best," you respond, reaching over to tug on her hair. she sighs in return, grabbing you by the shoulders and shaking you gently as she stares you down.
"answer your phone, ok? you can't ignore my texts now that you're leaving."
a quiet laugh leaves your lips at her words, and you nod reassuringly before giving her a loud smooch on the cheek and moving down the line. gojo watches you closely as you say your goodbye to yaga, the older man turning away from you to brush a fake tear away from his eye. he presses a soft, floppy doll into your hands before you move away from him, and gojo can see the distinct shine in your eye that lets him know that you're holding tears at bay.
he looks down at the ground when he realizes that he's the only one left for you to say goodbye to, and he can't help the way he tenses up when he sees your shoes come to a stop in front of him. there's a moment of silence during which gojo can feel everyone's eyes on him, and he begrudgingly looks up at you and removes his sunglasses.
if this is the last time he's seeing you, he's going to make sure he remembers every little detail.
there's a sharp intake of breath as you steadily meet his gaze, and you find yourself rendered speechless at the sight of his eyes. gojo can hear shoko cough lightly, and he steels himself before giving you a forced smile.
"so you're leaving," he whispers, his eyes widening slightly when he realizes what he's just said. you seem to be caught off guard as well, eyebrows raising in surprise before giving him a nod. he takes a moment to breathe, aware of shoko's lingering gaze as the two of you face each other. "oh. i didn't know."
"yeah," you breathe, rubbing your arm as you look away from him. "i hadn't gotten the chance to tell you. it seems like you're always off on a mission these days."
"you could've texted," gojo attempts to say jokingly, wincing when his words fall flat. you laugh lightly at his words, recognizing the teasing undertone even if the delivery had been less than perfect. you always seem to understand gojo, regardless of whether or not he wants you to.
"we both know you never look at your phone," you tease back, giving him a pretty smile that he hasn't seen in a while. he chuckles breathlessly at your jab, and he nods his agreement before glancing at shoko.
"neither do you," he shoots back, the corners of his lips turning up into a small smile when you follow his line of sight. "you gotta get better at that. can't risk pissing shoko off."
the space between the two of you is filled with uncertain laughter at gojo's remark, and you take a moment to study gojo before taking a step forward and wrapping your arms around his neck. he stumbles back a step or two at your sudden action, tensing up when you tuck your face into the crook of his neck.
"i'll miss you," you whisper, your breath warm against his neck. he tries to ignore the goosebumps that rise up along the smooth expanse of his neck, too focused on wrapping his arms around you and pulling you closer to him when he feels you start to step away.
gojo knows that everyone else is watching the two of you, he can feel shoko's soft gaze and yaga's sad look as he does his best to ignore them and bury his face into your hair. there's an intense urge to ask you to stay building up inside of him, and he clamps his lips shut tightly in order to keep himself from blurting out his plea. the two of you remain in each other's arms before you finally take a deep breath and step away, giving gojo a watery smile.
"i'll miss you, satoru," you whisper, looking away and blinking back your tears. "i'll see you later, yeah?"
gojo nods dumbly as you finally walk away, giving everyone one last wave before slipping into the car that's been waiting for you this entire time. it isn't until he sees it disappear from view that gojo realizes that he didn't tell you that he would miss you too.
he wastes no time in slipping his sunglasses back over his eyes, clearing his throat quietly before turning and making his way back inside the building.
a week later, gojo hears that nanami has left jujutsu tech as well, and he can't help but wonder if he'll ever see either of you again.
gojo likes to think that he's matured, even though shoko might say otherwise because she's certain she's right. and also to piss him off.
but the truth is, he's no longer the same spunky, reckless teenager he was before everything went wrong in his life. he knows how to sort of work through his emotions now— in a way he thinks is healthy, he might add, but he can't help but find himself frozen in this very moment. there's a weird ache in his heart, one that he silently notes seems to be brought on by the flurry of emotions he's feeling in that very instant.
he wonders if they're visible on his face. they are.
gojo satoru is the most powerful jujutsu sorcerer in japan, maybe even in the world, and yet he feels like he's been reduced to almost nothing when a familiar face slides into the seat across from him.
five years is clearly not long enough to forget you, gojo realizes, physically wincing at the way his heart seems to race at the sight of you. his eyes meet yours, and he holds steady eye contact with you for a few seconds before ducking his head and quietly excusing himself from the table.
he takes a deep breath to attempt and soothe his rattled nerves as he takes a seat at the bar, squishing himself into the corner so that he's not visible from your table. he orders a soda from the bartender, ignoring the disbelieving look he gets in return before he ambles off to prepare the drink.
gojo has barely taken a sip of the soda before shoko is crashing into his side, settling onto the barstool next to him and digging her elbow into his side as she calls her order out to the bartender. neither of them speak until shoko gets her drink, and she immediately lifts it to her lips and takes a big sip that makes gojo shudder with disgust.
"surprise," shoko says dryly, glancing at gojo as he spares a look in your direction. he notices three extra people at the table, and he lets his shoulders drop in relief when he sees familiar heads of blond, white, and brunette.
"yeah, quite the surprise," gojo huffs, taking another sip of his soda. he stares at shoko until she turns to face him, a mildly displeased look on her face as she takes in his furrowed eyebrows. "i didn't know you still kept in contact with them."
"i didn't know you didn't still keep in contact with them," shoko shoots back, raising an eyebrow as she studies gojo's conflicted expression. she continues before he can gather his thoughts, earning a loud sigh as she speaks. "you kept in contact with nanami just fine. in fact, all he does is complain about how you never leave him alone."
gojo swallows harshly at shoko's words, and he thinks long and hard before deciding to remain silent for the time being. he can't find it in himself to admit that the thought of reaching out to you hurts him more than he cares to admit. you had left the jujutsu world, the one part of your life that included him, behind. even if he wanted to, gojo doesn't think he can find the words to express how he's feeling.
"switch seats with me when we get back to the table," gojo says suddenly, pausing to slurp up the rest of his drink. shoko glares at him when he sucks on nothing but air, the obnoxious sound causing her to reach over and flick him in the cheek. gojo grins widely when she hits nothing but air, his infinity protecting him from shoko's incredibly violent wrath.
"no," she says, getting off her barstool and picking up her drink. gojo realizes too late that she's heading back to the table, and he scrambles after her in an attempt to get there before her. his attempts are fruitless, and he finds himself awkwardly standing behind shoko's seat as she takes her place two chairs down from you.
gojo acts normal when everyone turns to glance at him, and he stiffly makes his way back to his own seat, avoiding your questioning gaze as he sits down. it takes a second for the table to break out into chatter again, and gojo doesn't hesitate before turning to the seat next to him and striking up a conversation with utahime. he notices mei mei grab your attention out of the corner of his eye, and he can't help but sigh in relief as he focuses on utahime once again, disregarding her annoyed look.
gojo is certain that ignoring you is much easier than dealing with whatever the hell is causing him to feel like he's dying inside.
the days that follow the dinner at the restaurant are unnervingly quiet, and gojo finds himself sitting on his couch and wondering if he should reach out to you.
there are no missions to take at the moment, and gojo is left with nothing to do but stare at his phone and wait for a message that never comes. megumi takes note of his sullen behavior, and although a part of him is curious about gojo's sudden attitude change, he doesn't think he actually cares enough to ask the white-haired sorcerer about what seems to be bothering him.
a few more days pass before gojo ultimately decides that reaching out to you would do more harm than good, especially with the way he completely ignored you at dinner. he's given no time to even think about changing his mind, and the very next day, he's being sent out on yet another mission.
he eventually falls into the same monotonous routine his life had prior to his run-in with you, and he wonders what would've changed if he had decided to take the chance and reach out the day after seeing you. there's a dull ache in his chest that seems to linger even after he makes his decision, and it only seems to get worse whenever shoko deigns to share updates about you with him.
the two of them know that gojo is more than grateful for her updates, even if he refuses to ask about you outright. he's certain that if he were to fully give into his curiosity that his heart would feel like it's giving out on him, and not even shoko's displeased looks are enough for him to get over himself and just ask you directly. he's even stopped pestering nanami, too afraid that he would give in and ask him questions about you.
it isn't until a long time passes (a year and a half; he's kept count) that gojo thinks he's finally getting over it— getting over you. his heart finally starts feeling lighter and breathing becomes a little bit easier and he can't help but think about how silly he was being, staying hung up for so long on somebody who probably never even thought twice about him.
they're small improvements but they're still improvements, and gojo reminds himself of that even as he walks down the busy streets of tokyo. he breathes out a sigh of relief as he slips into the local pharmacy, the cool air conditioning a welcome reprieve from the sticky heat outside.
he mumbles to himself as he moves through the aisles, scanning the shelves as he looks for children's allergy medication. the sudden weather changes had affected megumi and tsumiki in a way none of them had expected, and gojo was left alone to deal with their pitiful sniffles and soft complaints.
"allergy meds," he whispers, reaching out to grab a box only to put it back when it's not the one he's looking for. "there's so much cough syrup, where's the aller—"
"gojo?"
so maybe he hasn't improved, gojo thinks to himself as he freezes up at the sound of your voice. he holds his breath as you approach him, and he squeezes his eyes shut when he feels your sleeve brush against his.
six and a half years isn't enough to forget about you either, it seems.
"it's been a while, huh?" you ask, giving him a soft glance before looking at the shelves in front of you. there's a light hum that escapes your lips as you bend down to grab something before straightening up and holding out a box in your hand. "allergy meds, right?"
gojo nods silently as he takes the box from you, quickly scanning the text on it to make sure it was the right brand. there's an awkward silence as he thinks about what to say, and he blurts out the first thing that comes to mind when you turn your face away from him.
"it's not for me!"
a noise that gojo thinks might be a giggle leaves your lips at his proclamation, and he mentally kicks himself for starting up a conversation with you.
"it's for megumi, right?" you ask softly, unaware of the way gojo's eyes widen at your question. "that zenin kid you took in?"
when you notice gojo's shocked look, you hastily ass onto your statement. "shoko told me about him when i asked about you."
'shoko told me about him when i asked about you.'
gojo thinks he feels his head spin when he hears those words come out of your mind. he does his best to remain calm, reaching out a hand to lean against the shelf comfortably and wincing when he instead knocks down a row of the cough syrups he had been studying earlier.
"uh, fushiguro, actually," he mutters, doing his best to focus on straightening out the products he knocked down. "his dad took his wife's last name or something like that. but yeah, the medicine is for him and his sister."
he finds himself shuffling awkwardly as you look down at your watch, eyes widening slightly when you take note of the time. he watches as you turn to face the shelf behind you, quickly plucking some eye drops off the shelf before turning back to him.
"i have to go, i'm running late for a meeting," you say sheepishly, giving gojo a soft smile. he gives you a half-smile in return, accompanied by a lazy wave as he waits for you to leave. you stand in front of him for a second, hesitating slightly before leaning in and wrapping your arms around him in a quick hug. gojo tenses up in your embrace, his breath catching in his throat and hands freezing mid-air before he hesitantly places them on your back. you pull back slightly after a few seconds, looking up at gojo with a stare that makes his heart feel like it's about to beat out of his chest before you address him once more. "it was nice to see you. we should catch up sometime."
you're gone with a smile and a wave, quickly paying for your eye drops before darting out the door. gojo remains in his spot for five minutes after your departure, only moving when he sees the amused look the cashier seems to be giving him. he doesn't speak as he pays for the allergy medication, and he hastily makes his exit back into the stifling heat. he starts walking down the street as he tucks his change into his pocket, eyebrows furrowing in confusion when his fingers brush against a piece of paper that hadn't bee there before.
there's an annoyed grumble from a passerby when gojo suddenly stops in the middle of the street, his fingers clutching onto the paper that contains very familiar handwriting.
'can't wait to see you again! :)'
the line is followed by what he assumes to be your phone number, and gojo can't help but wonder when you had the chance to write the note. he begins moving down the street again, his steps sluggish as he hesitates near a trash can. before he can think any harder, he lets the paper flutter into wastebasket, only pausing for a brief second before moving away.
not seeing you over the past year and a half made his heart feel lighter, yet all it took was a five minute interaction with you to make his heart feel worse than it ever had before.
the world loves to play cruel jokes on him, gojo thinks.
the past two years have been a whirlwind of chaos and uncertainty, and he's had no time to stop and think about you while dealing with geto, sukuna, and the emergence of the cursed spirit that calls itself mahito.
if he really thinks about it, he's had no time to sit and rest. from geto's attack to yuuta's training to megumi's missions to yuuji's interesting choice that led to him eating sukuna's finger, he's had no time to sit and truly enjoy the little things life has to offer.
(not that he's ever had the time. the life of a special grade sorcerer is a busy one, but gojo can't deny that things weren't always as complicated as they have been the last couple of years.)
so when yaga tells him that nanami is returning to jujutsu tech, gojo thinks that it's the perfect time to let yuuji learn from someone other than him while he takes care of some unfinished business. what he doesn't expect however, is to see you standing next to nanami, a pretty smile on your face as you greet yaga with a hug.
ten years. ten years and somehow, you still manage to make gojo feel the same way he did way back then.
there's something wrong with him, he thinks, especially because it's starting to seem like he's cursed to always somehow coexist with those he cares about without ever fully being a part of their lives. there's no way he can turn around and pretend he never saw you, not with the way yaga is already yelling at him to go over and greet the returners.
gojo wonders why this happens every time he sees you. he doesn't know how to label what he feels whenever you pop up in his life, and it isn't until you give him a hesitant greeting— your tone shy and awkward after receiving nothing but radio silence from him— that gojo thinks he might finally know what it is he feels for you.
and when the thought of him being in love with you crosses his mind and makes him feel like he wants to die, all he can do is tamp down his swirling emotions with a goofy grin aimed at nanami.
"nanami! what a pleasure to see you here," gojo sings, immediately pulling the blond man into a reluctant hug. he gives you a polite nod in greeting, and he can't help the way his heart sinks when you nod in response and look away.
"likewise," nanami replies, his tone strained as he pulls away from gojo. he fixes his shirt as he steps over to you, and the two of you stand silently as you wait for yaga to speak.
"introduce them to yuuji," yaga says, turning around and heading back towards his office. "and don't cause trouble. i mean it, satoru."
gojo giggles at yaga's words before clapping his hands and motioning for the two of you to follow after him, leading you down a series of hallways before you come to a stop in front of an empty room.
"yuuji! there's someone i'd like you to meet!"
you're taken slightly aback when your eyes meet bright, brown ones, and you can't help but stare as a teenage boy with pink hair comes to a stop in front of you and nanami.
"this is nanami kento!" gojo all but yells, once again slinging his arm around nanami's shoulders and swaying him back and forth. the boy, yuuji, looks at nanami curiously, his eyes focused on the glasses perched on his nose. he has no time to speak before gojo is introducing you as well, his voice softer than it had been when introducing nanami. yuuji's eyes sparkle as they shift to you, and all of a sudden he's breaking out into a boyish smile that only serves to remind you just how young he really is.
"woah! i didn't think you were actually real!" he proclaims, earning a strained laugh from gojo. "when gojo mentioned you he said you were really p—"
the rest of his words are muffled, gojo's hands clamped tightly against his mouth as he pulls yuuji away from you. out of the corner of your eye, you can see nanami staring at you, and you only give him a shrug in return as gojo pats yuuji's head and lets him go.
"you'll be following them around on missions," gojo finally explains, pushing yuuji towards you and nanami. "they're both grade 1 sorcerers so don't worry, you'll be safe! now if you'll excuse me, i have to go."
gojo's out of the room before either of you can breathe out a goodbye, and you tense for a second before excusing yourself and following after him. he hasn't gotten terribly far, but his long legs give him the advantage of staying ahead of you even as you start jogging lightly in an attempt to catch up to him.
"gojo!" you call out, huffing lightly when he ignores you and turns a corner. "hey! gojo, wait! satoru!"
the sounds of his given name has his steps faltering, and he reluctantly turns around when he hears your footsteps getting closer and closer. there's a rigidity to his stance that you've never seen, his shoulders hunched in an almost defensive way as you finally come to a stop in front of him.
"yeah?" he asks, an uncomfortable grin settling on his lips as he looks anywhere but you. he's grateful for his blindfold in this very moment, the dark fabric preventing him from seeing you in your entirety and preventing you from seeing the way he can't seem to look at you for more than half a second.
"i—," you say, starting to speak and cutting yourself off before looking down at the ground. you sigh softly, shaking your head lightly as your shoulders slump. "never mind. forget about it."
you turn to walk back to the room, and gojo feels like he might actually keel over and die right then and there if he lets you walk away yet again.
"how have you been?"
gojo's question hangs in the air, and he can't help but flinch when you finally look at him again, your eyes swirling with hurt and sadness and other emotions that pass so quickly that gojo isn't sure he could figure out what they were even if he tried.
"you'd know if you hadn't thrown my phone number away," you retort quietly, crossing your arms as he approaches you. gojo breathes in sharply at your words but remains quiet, his throat going dry as he realizes that you had seen what he did that day. "why, gojo?"
gojo weighs his options, vacillating between telling you the truth or spewing a lie. the words seem to spill out of his mouth before he can even think about whether or not to say them, a trend he notices is extremely common whenever he's in your presence. "because you've ruined my life."
okay, so the truth it is.
your eyes widen in hurt when you take in his words, and it takes everything you have to not burst into tears on the spot. "oh, i see."
"wait," gojo says, scrambling to fix the situation that just keeps getting worse and worse with everything he says or does. "that's not what i meant."
"then what did you mean?" you ask sharply, your eyes narrowing slightly as you stare him down.
"what i mean is that i think i love you," he says in a rush, ignoring the way your eyes widen in surprise at his admission. he doesn't give you the chance to respond, too focused on saying everything that's been building up for the past decade before he gets cold feet. "you've ruined my life, you know? it's been ten years but it's damn near impossible to get over you. my heart still feels as heavy as it did the day you let, maybe even heavier, and i threw away your number because i didn't see any benefit in reaching out to you. why would i torture myself by keeping in contact with you when i belong to the world you wanted to leave behind?"
"i wanted to leave the jujutsu world behind," you interject softly, taking a hesitant step towards gojo before coming to a stop. "that doesn't mean i wanted to leave gojo satoru behind."
"oh," gojo breathes. he wonders if you can hear how loud his heart is beating in his chest, and he decides that maybe he doesn't care. "does that mean that—"
"i liked you?" you interrupt, nodding your head softly. "or like, i guess. i agree, ten years isn't enough to get over you."
"i was talking about you," gojo mumbles dumbly, earning a shrug in response from you. a loud crash sounds from the direction of the room you had left nanami in, and you give gojo a hesitant look before motioning in the direction of the noise.
"i should probably go and check that out," you say quietly, a smile twitching at the corners of your lips. "y'know, make sure that nanami is okay."
"um, yeah. yeah that sounds reasonable," gojo says, his mind still focused on your impromptu confession.
"i don't think this conversation is over yet," you continue, breathing out a laugh when gojo nods in agreement. he jumps slightly when you take his hand in yours, slipping a piece of paper into in before tugging him down to press a kiss to his cheek. "let me know when you're free, yeah? maybe we can get dinner or something and talk."
"are you asking me out on a date?" he asks cheekily, doing his best to compose himself.
"maybe i am," you say slyly, squeezing his hand once before letting go. you turn to walk down the hall, only pausing to look at him over your shoulder once before you turn the corner. "don't lose my number this time, okay?"
gojo chuckles at your words, nodding in agreement as he gives you a lazy salute. "i wouldn't dream of it."
it isn't until you're out of sight that gojo realizes his heart feels the lightest that it's ever felt in years, and he finds himself once again wondering when you had gotten the chance to write the note.
reblogs are appreciated <3 ty for reading !!
#gojo x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo x you#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk imagine#gojo imagine#jujutsu kaisen imagine#gojo satoru imagine#satoru x reader#gojou x reader#jjk fluff#gojo fluff#gojo satoru fluff#gojo imagines#jujutsu kaisen fluff
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play pretend ! ₊⟡⋆ nsfw.
the premise of fake dating your best friend, for just a weekend, is hilarous.. and scary. but what happens after is even scarier.. it's just play pretend right?
warnings / includes — sex, heavy fwb themes, bit of angst
shame coated you when you woke up in one of the guest rooms, carefully placed onto the bed at about 3am by no other then jungkook while you were dead hungover. pure rotten shame rests in your cheeks, paints them red when you say bye to his family a few hours later as jungkook couldn't quite even look at you.
everything about him was different. the way he moved around you, the way he avoided looking directly at you. hell, even his voice sounded quieter, less confident, like he didn’t know what to do either.
something had changed him, for the worse.
and it was all your damn fault.
you had thought the car ride would give you both time to defrost, pretend that whatever happened the night earlier did in fact not happen, crack some jokes but to no avail — long, defening silence.
silence and shame don't go well together, the color they create on the canvas of yours, it soaked through you. stayed with you for the next five days, it's the color of the message you send him at 11 pm on saturday, asking him how he was doing.
it's the ugly color of the 'delivered' button that stays there for the following two days.
the dress you wear to the next party is bright, anything to drown out the guilt that was eating you alive.
the music is loud, and so are you. laughing a little too hard, moving a little too close to anyone who shows you attention. you take another sip of whatever is in your cup, the liquid burning its way down your throat but dulling the ache in your chest.
and then there’s him.
you don’t see Jungkook immediately, but you feel him before your eyes catch his across the room. you feel the way the air shifts, the way your stomach churns when you notice the familiar set of his jaw, the way his eyes flicker toward you.
you almost drop your drink.
because it feels like a candid flashback of that night—only now it’s all so different. why did things have to be so complicated?
you’re pressed against some guy you barely know, his lips grazing your neck in a way that should distract you. you’ve been letting it happen, letting him flirt, letting his hands wander because it’s easier than thinking about the mess you left unresolved.
but then there’s jungkook. he stands on the other side, the neon light painting his face; his look wasn't judging. maybe light disappointment but more observing then anything, really. and it reminded you of how you used to stare at him whenever he was going after various girls at these exact sorts of parties.
it makes you sick, makes the unfamilar hands on your body feel foul and uninviting, it's not the fire burning through you like it had that night, it's cold ice, slowly creeping through your veins, making it's way to your brain.
said ice whispers things you don't want to hear, reminds you of things you don't want to think about.
"fuck, i think i like you."
you run of upstairs to the nearest balcony, the house was familar one of your mutual friends', this place was where you used to play spin the damn bottle in high school. now it feels haunted, just as univiting as the guy's hands felt a few minutes ago, why did everything feel so distant now? first jungkook, now everything else. why was it so consuming?
you light up a cigarette, you didn't usually smoke but you wanted to feel that fire again, the warmth, the pure need from a week ago. you regreted not having fucked the guy because you were sure he could've made you forget for longer then this cig could.
“thought I might find you here,” he says behind you, kneeling next to you yet keeping a safe distance, his voice low and cautious.
"you shouldn't have," you respond coldly, because anger is a better emotion to feel then regret and you had plenty things to be frustrated about, "you've been avoiding me for a whole week, don't pretend like you give a fuck." you don't meet his eyes, just take another drag.
but you see him flinch in the corner of your eye. great, the guilt sits in you once again.
he shifts slightly, and you can feel the tension radiating off him , “i know I’ve been a jerk, but it’s not that simple—”
“then make it simple.” your voice is sharper than you intended, but the hurt has festered for too long. you finally turn to face him, “i need to know what you want. because this? whatever this is? it’s fucking misery.”
the words hang heavily in the air, and for a moment, silence stretches between you. jungkook looks like he’s grappling with his thoughts, the tension in his body palpable. then, slowly, he closes the distance between you, his eyes softening as he cups your face in his hands.
“can I kiss you?” he asks, his voice a whisper, as if the question itself is laced with vulnerability.
you nod, and the moment your lips touch, it’s like everything else fades away. the kiss starts soft, gentle, as if he’s savoring the moment, and you can feel your heart begin to race.
it's nothing like the previous fire you had wished to experience earlier, it's delicate warming sunlight, brushing over your skin, washing away the hideous color that had built over the last few days.
“friends with benefits,” he murmurs against your lips, his breath hot and sweet. “we get to have this-” he kisses you again, slow and lingering, “—without the pressure of expectations.”
“expectations?” you echo, your mind racing as you try to process his words.
“yeah,” he replies, his lips brushing against yours, each touch sending shivers down your spine. “we can enjoy each other without worrying about where it’s going. just... pure fun.” his hands toy with the hem of your dress, before returning your gaze.
time slips quick, it all feels so raw, so different from that night yet all so much better.
his hands grip your thighs, pulling you closer, driving deep inside you with a primal urgency. you can feel the way he fills you, stretching you perfectly. you're so glad you aren't drunk, that you'll remember this in the morning and the day after.
you claw at his back, nails digging in, urging him on, needing more, wanting all of him. and he curses, runs his mouth like the talkative brat you knew he always was, degrades you one second, tentatively kisses your cheeks the next.
his hands rest on your tighs as he kisses along your clit once again, sweet, real. taunts you 'for the mess you made on your friend's coach' but he doesn't give you time to feel guilty, just starts nuzzling his face back into your pussy, licking along.
no, jungkook will never make you feel the same guilt again. you're sure of it, well — not that you could really properly think under these conditions anyway.
#bts fic#bts x reader#jungkook#bangtan fic#bangtan x reader#jungkook fic#jungkook imagine#jungkook smut#bangtan x you#bts jungkook#jeon jungkook x reader#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#jungkook x y/n#bts fluff#bts smut#bts fanfiction#bts fanfic#bts x y/n#bts x fem!reader#bangtan smut#bangtan fanfic#🐈⬛✧˖° play pretend! verse
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Little Girls Shouldn't Be Out Alone
Pairing: The Salesman x Fem!reader
Summary: running away from home might've been the worst decision of your life.. but its not because youre homeless now, its because you met him.
Warning: dead dove do not eat, brief knife play, dubcon, light bdsm, kidnapping/stalking, age gap, mentions of suicide + more.
A/N: not proof read. I tried doing the salesman justice..I promise
6.9k Words
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the scene you were in was so cliche it was almost funny. your mother died not too long ago, and it was really hard for you because she was the one person in your life that seemed to really care about you. she was everything you wanted to be in life..growing up she was your idol, and to this day she still is... you just wished you had noticed it sooner.. maybe if you did you could've prevented it.. prevented her suicide. its been 2 months but it still haunts your brain, the scene of it. you wanted to throw up thinking about it. her bright smile ceased to exist, her intelligence couldnt impress you any more. it all ended with the gun going off in her mouth..intelligence splattered all over the walls of her shared bedroom with the gun laying next to her... and in result of your mothers suicide your father had to take you in. they had divorced when you were around 4 years old...you don't remember much. but living with him made you realize, your mother did the best choice she could've made then..even if she cried over it for years.
your father was an alcoholic, he didn't abuse you with hits and violence but he abused you with words. blaming you from the divorce and suicide of your mother. you tried to not let it get to your head..it wasn't your fault and he knew it. if anything the blood of your mother stained his hands.. but with the never lasting tournament he inflicted on you a part of you thought maybe he was right...maybe she didn't end her life over you but you could've prevented it. you were the closest person to your mother and vice versa..so..how did you never notice it? her suffering? did you miss all the signals..how stupid were you... she ended her life and you did nothing about it. you were useless...as per usual...
anyways...as you were saying. the scene you stood in the middle in was so cliche, it was like it belonged in a teenagers wattpad story. you were crouched down in an alley way, rain soaking you and everything around you as you sobbed into your hands. you couldn't live with your father anymore, you just couldn't. you knew if you stayed just one week longer..you'd follow your moms footsteps.. you hated this, you just wanted to live a happy normal life. apply for a nice university, move into a dorm, and visit your mom and dad during breaks... but the world wanted otherwise. here you were, drenched in water as you sat in the middle of nowhere...you had run away from home. you had no idea what to do next. your covered your backpack in a plastic bag but it barely helped. all your necessities were wet and your money was probably soggy by now. you're so stupid. couldve you just checked the forecast. to make sure the day you run away from home was a day the weather wouldn't freeze you alive? you couldnt do anything, nothing at all. should you just head back home? deal with your fathers screams for just a few months more before you could save up and move out? or should you just stay here..soggy and homeless... you knew what you were going to do... you'd stay here. you could take what the world would throw at you. you knew you could..but you just couldn't take another second of your dads tormenting. hes probably hoping you went off and jumped off a bridge or something..ending your fate just like your mother did.
you had fallen asleep, it was still raining and cold...but it was notably less than before. you were shivering, shaking in both fear and how frigid you were feeling. your teeth were clattering and you were being hyper aware of everything around you. if someone comes up to me all scary and intimidating I'll throw my backpack at them. it'll give me time to run away.. the sound of cars driving on the slippery wet roads filled your ears ever so often...the street was dead. if something happened to you no one would know.. squish squish squish you could hear the sound of foot steps echo around the streets...and it was getting louder..closer... until... "what are you doing here." a man holding an umbrella was standing Infront of you, he looked neat and tidy. the opposite of what you looked like at the moment. his suit was ironed to perfection, not a wrinkle in site. his hair slicked back neatly with gel.. and his features... they were striking and fierce.. he was handsome.. he tilted his head to the side and stared at you with his souless dark eyes. "well?" his tone wasnt soft but it wasn't stern either...it was like he was asking a child if they could hand him over the toy they've been playing with... you gulped down the lump that was forming inside your throat. "n-nothing..nothing important.." you spoke, barely over a whisper. you were nervous and scared. you felt like something was off about him, he just seemed too good to be true. handsome men like him always have something they hide from the rest of the world. he raises his right eyebrow at you, obviously not believing that you were doing nothing.. "do you need help? I could get you a new pair of clothes. this area is dangerous, did you know that?" he smiled at you, but it wasn't genuine at all. it was like one of annoyance...if he was so annoyed why would he offer a hand to you? it didn't make sense... you stared up at him from the floor, you felt like a stray puppy left in a box. and he was here to pick you up and become your new owner.. you knew this was probably a bad idea, you knew he was bad business. but.... you were so scared and cold in the rain..what would be worse than this? "yeah...I need help.." you spoke softly, you refused to look at him as you did so. you felt embarrassed....asking a stranger for help because of a stupid mistake you did with your own free will..you're pathetic... "great, I'd love to help you. follow me." he spoke, but it didn't seem like he was glad or happy to be at help at all.. he spoke with a deadpan voice, as if he was bored and wanted to get this over with. was this some sort of community service thing he has to do? help the homeless during the rain? whys he acting like he's being forced at gunpoint to do this... you got up from the ground, all wet and soaked in rain water. you felt so uncomfortable you wanted it to end..you grabbed your bag and followed him at a small distance... he lead you to a car. a black suv, it was clean and pretty...and it looked warm. you kept walking until you were right next to him, was he gonna let you inside the car? but you'd make it dirty and wet..and was this even a good idea??? heading inside a strange mans car in the middle of the night in the pouring rain.. but you didnt have much time to think much about it as he had opened a door to the car..the interior was a lot like him. clean, tidy and sleek... "well? get inside, don't worry about getting it wet. I don't mind." he smiled at you again, with the same fake smile that made your skin crawl because of the sheer eeriness to it. "ah- yes okay..." you crawled into the car, your wet clothes making a slight squeaky sound against the material of the car seat.. you set your bag next to you as he slammed the door shut...and it was pretty aggressive. the loud slam that echoed through the streets from it made you flinch as you stared at him walking around the car to the drivers seat.
you were sitting on the toilet, inside of this strange mans house...I mean, nothing happened yet so you should be safe right?... you turn to look at the shower that was running, waiting for the water to turn warm..and then you stared at the folded clothes. he grabbed some clothes he thought would fit you and sent you to the bathroom with it. you were confused, he was being nice..but for what? it seemed like he didn't want anything from you..maybe he was a little annoyed but he was still helping you.. he seemed normal.. you were so confused. he even put the clothes you were wearing and the clothes that got wet in your backpack into the washer. maybe humanity is just getting better and he's truly just a kind man who wants to help? you stare around in the bathroom, its almost all white with black accents. it was very modern and clean..paintings on the walls that probably cost more than your houses rent..because truthfully this man was obviously very rich. his house was huge and it seemed like he had rows and rows of guest rooms..it was impressive. maybe he was just a snobby rich guy that was trying to fix his attitude. so maybe that's why he seemed so annoyed and put off with you.. he was trying to fix his views on dirty poor people by helping them!! that had to be it..you just cracked the code!! you smirk to yourself and give yourself an imaginary pat on the back before checking the water to see if it was hot now..and when it was you stepped into the shower. the warm water fell onto your body, like it was engulfing you in a tight hug. even though you were in a strangers house, in an area you didn't even know existed...you felt like you were at home. taking a warm shower, getting ready to go out with your mom..... you and the strange man haven't spoken much, he just gave you clothes, put your old clothes in the washer, gave you food and sent you to a guest room.. he was cold, you'd expect a man that was willing to help a stranger from the streets to be nice..and warmer. but he wasn't. you were getting curious about him, what was his name? where did he work? why'd he even help you...but you decided to stay in your place. at the end of the day, you two were still strangers who would never meet again after this. the thought kind of left a pang in your heart. you wanted to know more about him..maybe..maybe he'll want to stay in touch..? but you highly doubted that considering how cold and silent he was. he probably just felt pity seeing such a young girl sleeping in the rain on the streets...he didn't do this to get close. just to make himself feel better.. that's how rich people just are.. you sighed and stared up at the ceiling of the room..you'd be out of there by tomorrow, left in the streets all alone again. you felt your eyelids getting heavy, you started to black out until you closed your eyes and fell asleep..sound asleep.
you woke up to the sound of knocking on the bedroom door, you could only assume it was the man that helped you last night because..who else could it be? you woke up, still droopy as you stretched and looked out the windows. it was bright out now...it was time to get up... you didn't want to but that didn't matter because this wasn't even your house. you got out of the bed and put the slippers the man gave you on. you pulled the shirt that was slipping off your shoulder up as you lazily shuffled your way to the door and creaked it open. you started up at the taller man, again in his neat suit and styled hair. he always manages to unintentionally..or maybe intentionally embarrass you. "still sleepy, huh? you should change and put your clothes in your bag. breakfast is being made." he flashes you another smile...a fake forced smile. its like he doesn't know how to smile or something...you just slowly nod your head at him before he turns around and leaves... you were hoping he'd get the sense of pity again and let you stay longer. you wouldn't mind being treated llke shit here if it meant you got to stay in this house. but of course..people don't like it when cockroaches sneak inside. you closed the door In front of you and did the bed. you didn't want to leave with a bad impression In case he even gets this weird savior complex again..you did the bed and packed your clothes, you headed your way downstairs to the kitchen with your bag in hand...that smell..it smelled like home. the smell of bacon filled your senses as you got closer and closer down the stairs. you haven't smelled something like that in the morning since your mother died, she would always make you eggs, bacon and toast. it was simple but you loved it. you just wished you had savored it more because with no shocker,, your dad doesn't cook. at all. you almost always order something and if you don't you're the one cooking. but even then, he always complains about how shitty your food tastes..even though you know its not true. you finally get to the end of the staircase, the stairs end right near the kitchen so you get a good look at what's going on. it seems he has a personal chef cooking up breakfast as he's sat at the table, sipping on coffee while on his phone. "ahem.." you awkwardly announce your presence to the man at the table, he stares up at you with a blank face. eyes full of nothing but darkness..the more you stare the scarier he gets. as if he were a walking body with no soul inside of him. "sit down. breakfast is almost finished." he speaks blankly, just like his face. something about the atmosphere feels a lot more awkward than before. it seems he isn't even bothering to smile at you like earlier...maybe something happened while you got changed? or maybe he's just not a morning person...you wouldn't really know but you started day dreaming. wondering about his life. maybe its because of how mysterious he is, or his face or wealth..you weren't really sure but something about him allured you. you wanted to know more even if he didn't want to know more about you. you didn't really care if the interest was one sided. you were just too curious... but again, not your place.. at least you felt like it wasn't..he was clearly not interested in having small talk with you. like at all. you didn't want to annoy him more than he seemingly already was. you wanted him to help you again because truthfully, no matter how scary he was or seemed..he was still helping you.. and you need the help. and appreciated it.. minutes passed and nothing was even muttered, a small cough or creak of the chair every now and then but that was it...and the silence was deafening. it was so awkward you could die..you were fiddling with your fingers waiting for the food, you almost just wanted to ask if you could leave now and that you didn't want to eat but.. that would be rude, and you didn't want to be rude. so you just sat still, letting the silence explode your eardrums. . .
"your food is ready" those four words felt like an angel had just saved you from hell, you were about to explode from the tension. and it wasn't the good kind. "ah, thank you!" you bowed your head at the lady that cooked the breakfast as she walked away.. you looked at your plate and then at the mans non existent one..he wasn't going to eat breakfast? he has seen your confused stares because he set his phone down and placed his chin on his hand, he was staring right at you. "I don't eat breakfast. I was just waiting for you to get your food." he stared at you before smiling at you, it wasn't as eerie or fake as the other smiles he's given you but..it was exactly genuine either. like a pity smile..something along those lines. "oh..thank you for waiting.." you bowed your head at him too before you began to eat..it was the same breakfast..the same one your mother had always made for you..what were the odds?..right? you felt yourself getting emotional, eating this simple breakfast just reminded you of your mother. but you couldnt cry Infront of this man...he'd probably just stare at you and do nothing about your sad state...you didn't feel like embarrassing yourself like that. not Infront of this stranger. . . . . "I finished..." you stare up at him, your entire plate is finished due to not eating all day yesterday. he stared at your plate and then at you, you felt kind of embarrassed..like he was judging you for eating.. "okay, should I leave you where I found you or at a house" he stared at you with a blank face, emotionless as he awaited your answer. you help in a frown at the way he worded it, sure he found you but...it felt like he was referring to you as if you were a stray animal. you bit the inside of your right cheek, you really didn't want to go. you wanted to stay safe in shelter but you didn't have a choice...you could either ask him to take you back to the place you dreaded the most, or a place you dreaded a little less... "take me back to the alley way you saw me in.." you stared at your lap as he nodded. he pushed his chair back before taking one last sip of his coffee. "follow me to the car." he pushed his chair back under the table as you got up right after him... I guess now my journey as a homeless person really starts now...I need to find a job soon...
time skip
its been a couple of days since the strange man helped you from the alley way. your delusional side tells you one day he'll be back for you so you sleep there everynight, letting a dumpster bin hide your sleeping body from those who pass by the alley way. todays its been awfully gloomy, cloudy, windy and cold.. you were hoping it wouldn't rain since you didn't want to stay there cold and wet again..and you highly doubted the man would be back for you if it did...you spent most of these days searching for a job, with no avail.. rejection after rejection ...it was wearing you down... how long would you even hold up for in these streets? you were barely 20 but you were already on the streets. not like you had a choice. it was either suicide or homelessness for you.. you decided to just take a break from searching for jobs today. you didn't have much money left from your savings but you had enough spare change to go to put your dirty clothes and buy an ice cream in the park nearby...you went looking around for a big enough plastic bag to cover your backpack in. you had a feeling it would rain hard again, you could smell it even. and you didn't want to play princess waiting for her knight in shining armor to come save her. you need to think ahead..and be smart..
as always..you were right. it was going to rain today, and it was raining hard. it brought you back to the day you were found by the man all cold and scared in the rain. you were lucky he didn't rape you, you were too trusting of him.. you were once again shuffled up in the alley way, wet and cold. you were sitting on the ground hugging yourself while your backpack sat next to you. at least you found a bag for it, at most it'd get a little wet but nothing compared to last time... your hair and clothes were soaked, you could feel water droplets form on your eyelashes as you tried to wipe away the water that was landing on your face with your equally as wet hands. you were scared..again. you were hoping to god the man would come back, you even place your backpack in view to the street and road Incase he passed by..he would know you were still there. your entire body was ice cold, your breath, fingers, clothes, you were freezing.. after a few hours of sitting in the rain you decided that it was about time you just go to sleep..no one was going to come by and save you again. you leaned your head onto the dumpster next to you and fell asleep. the sheer cold and wetness of the situation didn't leave your senses but..it was almost like you had forgotten about it while you slept. . . . "again?" you heard a voice, a very familiar voice..you jumped out of your sleep and looked up at the person standing infront of you. it was the man that had helped you last time this happened. you felt your cheeks warm up, both at how embarrassing this was, and how sweet (?) it was.. he came back to check on you. whether it was out of worry or pity, you couldn't tell. but either way it made you happy to see someone checking up on you. he just started at you, with the same dark, soulless eyes as always. he just turned around and started walking away. you didn't know whether you should follow him or not..but you trusted your guts and you did. he led you to the same suv as before, it even looked the same. clean, sleek..like you hadn't gotten it dirty that day you got in. "get in" he stared at you, waiting for your response. his sentence threw you off a little, it was as if he was commanding you...but you didn't pay much attention and got inside the car. watching him as he slammed the door again..and walked around the car into the drivers seat. he was still the same.. but in his defense its only been 4 days since he had helped you.
you two were sitting at the dining table, his cook had made the two of you steak with some veggies.. you weren't that hungry but you still ate to be respectful..the same awkward silence corrupted a seemingly 'wholesome' moment. you wanted to say something, it was itching inside your throat. you just wanted to ask his name so you didn't have to call him a stranger anymore.. but he still didn't seem interested. why the hell would he help you if he wasn't interested in even getting to know your name? this was the second time. and even if he denied it was obvious he went there for you..to help you. "you, what's your name." he had put down his fork and knife and stared at you, obviously asking you the question. but you still felt unsure if you should answer. what if he was looking at someone else..or what if he was insane and talking to himself..you were so lost in your thoughts you didn't even notice how his face was changing. he was getting irritated with you. "well? I asked you a question." his voice was more stern than before, his eyebrows were raised and he looked at you with an expression you couldn't read. it was probably annoyance though. "oh- I'm sorry..I've just been kind of out of it...my names y/n" you stared at him and give him an awkward smile. you fiddled with your fingers under the table, you didn't know if he was going to keep talking. "I can tell. well y/n, what are you doing outside all alone? don't tell me you're this young and so in debt you had to go homeless." he stared at you, his facial expression changing to disappointment. but you ignored that and processed what he said first, what does he mean he can tell? did he bring you here just to insult you?? you internally scoffed before shaking your head not to him. "I'm thanfully not in any debt... I just left my home for personal reasons.." you weren't staring at his face but you could tell his facial expression changed, he simply just hummed at you and took a sip of his wine. "what about you? what's your name..and how old are you? you felt it was fair to ask him questions back since he had asked you some. it isn't rude to just be curious right? "you can just call me sir. and I'm 42 years old.. old, huh?" he sarcastically laughed and took a sip of his wine. all that you were thinking was, why was he trying to be so mysterious?? "oh..okay..sir" it felt awkward calling him sir, what if it was a weird kink of his..he could've atleast given you a fake name if he wanted to be like that.. . . . . "thank you for helping me again sir" you bowed at him, not too 90 degree angle but just enough for your thankfulness to be clear. "I appreciate it." you smiled at him, and unlike his smiles..yours was genuine. you truly were happy to have been 'safe' from the rain. even if it soaked you for a while... you were at the alley way again, the sky still looked cloudy and sad. you were scared itd rain again but that's a worry youd have to think of for later. "youre welcome y/n." he just gave you another fakeass smile, the one that's painfully obvious like he's doing it on purpose before he got into his car and drove off. leaving you there to figure out what you should do if it does rain again. but you werent too worried..maybe he'd come back..?
history repeats its self, at least it was for you. you kept finding yourself hugging yourself for warmth in the same alley way, with the same rain pouring down on you. was this strange man gonna save you from this rain aswell or has he given up on saving you from the cruel weather. maybe its still you gulp up the courage to go back home because the weather was driving you insane. the mans help wasn't even helping , it was just giving you a false sense of hope. you sat there for hours, under the pouring rain. and even worse, this time it was thundering. your skin was cold and freezing, every inch of you was soaked in water. you wanted to melt into the ground, the scene was so pathetic. you were pathetic. . . . after what felt like an eternity you came to the conclusion he truly wasn't going to help you. you were nothing but a prop to fuel his ego.. you let your heavy eyelids close as the rains soaked you and everything around it... you would just sleep it out..and find somewhere to sleep that wouldn't leave you like this. . . . you fluttered your eyes open not long after you had fallen asleep. you weren't fully awake yet but you have a strange feeling that someone was looking over you...watching you... you turned your head and rubbed your eyes. you stared at the person watching you, it was the strange man!! he was here to save you from the rain one last time.. your eyes brightened as you stared at him, but something was off. he was holding something..your eyes were a little fuzzy so you couldnt see properly but you knew it wasn't an umbrella like always..he was also getting soaked in the rough rain. before you could ask him about it you felt something hard hit your head. like you've just been struck a pipe... you stared up at the man, eyes going droopy as you fell to the ground... did he just hit you? what...what was happening..why you..?
you woke up in a barely lit, red room. you were confused and scared. you didnt remember much.. just the fact that you were hit by some sort of pole and woke up here. did karma finally get to you for not helping your mom in her time of need? were you going to get raped and killed here?? you started to hyperventilate, you wanted to scream for help but you found it hard to even make noise..your throat was closing and it felt like you were going to pass out again.. your breaths were rapid and your body was shaking. you wanted to get away but you couldnt. your wrists were bound to a chair that seemed to be super glued to the floor. you were pulling at the restraints, you were gasping for air. your eyes were slit as they darted around the room..looking for anyone that could help you... "fuck you look so hot when you're scared" a figure walked out from the shadows of the room...it was the man that had been saving you from the rain??! his dark eyes pierced holes into your head, you were trying to process what the fuck was happening.. he stepped closer to you and stopped right Infront of you. you pushed against the floor and chair, trying to find a way to magically get away. your eyes were wide and filled to the brim with fear, your breathing only got worse as you started to let out choked sobs. "p-please..don't do anything to me please..please.. let me go....I wont..tell anyone..please" you closed your eyes shut, not wanting to look at the man that you were hoping just hours ago would come save you. when you wanted to be saved you didn't mean it like this.. your salty tears dripped from your chin onto the collar of the dry shirt you were wearing. it seemed while you were out he had changed you out of your wet clothes and into the same pair you had worn last time you were here.. your head held low as you were sobbing for your dear life, he hasnt done anything to you yet but you knew he was going to. his cold hands touched your chin, yanking it up to stare at him. the action only made you sob harder, your eyes still glued shut. you didn't want to look at him, you did- "open your eyes and stare at me if you don't want to end up dead." you flinched and opened your eyes quickly, your large eyes stared up at his. they were wet and teary...you just wanted to be free..you didn't want to be here..before you could act upon anything he leaned down and licked one of your eyes, licking away the forming tears that were prickling at the corner of it. you didn't know if this was some sort of weird kink of his or if he did it just to make you uncomfortable but you hated it. it felt uncomfortable and too in your space. you hated this foul man. disgusting. your face was a mixture of uncomfortability, anger and fear. and he loved it. "I love that weird face you're making, doll, keep doing it" he smirked at you..he was staring you down. making you even more uncomfortable than before. he was a freak, was he into peoples pain or something?? can he just let you go.. he stared at you even longer..inspecting every little movement your face made...he loved it. he loved seeing you in discomfort and fear. it fit you, really well. "ever since I've seen you I've been mesmerized... don't mistaken my words as a confession though. this isn't love. this is desire." he reached his hand out to your head, patting and petting you. ruffling your hair and making it all messy..as if you were his pet. "you know, when I saw you..I thought to myself.. 'little girls shouldn't be out alone'..especially in the rain.. where gross men like me could stick their slimy dicks inside you with no consequence." his hand wandered down from your hair to your cheek, down to your neck.. his large hand gripped at your neck, causing you to squirm under the fear he might choke you to death. his eyes and list scrunched into a smile as his hand pressed on your neck, watching you squirm under his grip. "I wouldn't kill you before putting my dick inside you. so calm down, will you?" he grips tighter around your neck as his other hand crawls its way down up body....
he stripped the clothes you had on from your body, you were sitting on the chair, naked. your wrists are still bounded to the chair so you couldn't move or go anywhere. you felt so gross. a random middle aged man was manhandling your tits, grabbing them so hard it left red marks on them. you were holding in moans, you were scared but fuck did his hands feel good on your sensitive nipples. but you didn't want him to know you didn't want him to know you were feeling go- "AH!~" you let out a mixture of a scream and a moan, his right hand had snuck its way down from your chest to your now wet pussy. he shoved two fingers inside, no warning, no prep, just shoved them in. only using the wetness of your pussy to help his movements. your back arched against the chair, you were moaning in both pain and pleasure now. he was handling you like a piece of meat, roughly 'massaging' your boobs and ruining your insides. he made rough scissor motions with his fingers, occasionally curling them inside of you. it hurt so bad, it hurt. so. bad. "you cried and sobbed like you didn't want this but look at you now. moaning under me. you were even wet when I put my fingers in. slut." his voice was deep and full of need,, he took his hand away from your tits before he slapped you. really hard. the skin on your cheek stung and was probably starting to turn red.. but it felt good..even thought you didn't want this, and all you wanted to do was go home...his fingers..they felt too good to go back. "fuck I wanna make you go through so much pain, I want to ruin you. fuck." his fingers continued to ravish your insides as he shamelessly started to rub his hard on. he was getting so turned on by this. a scared young girl, pleasuring the older scary guy Infront of her so he can make it out alive.. he wanted more. he took his hand out of your pussy, your clit was twitching. needy for more. you whined at him, you wanted to cum, you wanted to release.. you wanted it all... he scoffed at you before spitting onto your face and giving you another harsh slap. "stop complaining bitch, be grateful anyone would even want to fuck a dirty mutt like you." he tsk'd at you before turning around and grabbing something from a small box nearby. your heart was pounding, your mind was racing and your hole was pulsing. the way he disrespected you, the way he spoke to you.. it turned you on. were you just needy for approval and wanted to do what it takes to impress the guy? or maybe it was so you could keep your life..or maybe you were just insanely horny. you didn't even know at this point. you didn't know what was taking over you. the man turned around...holding a knife. you started to feel your heart race in fear again, your breath hitched as you tried to push away from the chair...and of course you couldn't. he stepped closer, and closer, an closer. until he was barely inches away from you. he raised the knife and pointed it at your stomach, pushing it into your skin.. not enough to stab you or make your bleed, but enough for it to hurt. it was like getting a shot at the doctors office that lasted too long for your comfort. you shifted under the knife, you were uncomfortable. not that scared but you were anxious..you didn't like the thought of a sharp knife being pushed onto the skin of your stomach that much.. "you look cute like this. I would cut you but I don't think it's time for that right now." he smiled at you, like you had just won a grand prize..and frankly you think you did. you didn't want to deal with more pain than what you were already feeling. he put the knife down, dropping it onto the floor. your pupils were blown. he looked so hot like this. it was scary but, hot as fuck. "opinions on getting your insides ruined?" he spoke, flashing his signature fake smile.
you were finally free from the chair, your wrists felt so much better. they felt less imprisoned.. but you didn't have much time to think about that as your insides were getting rearranged by the man you had once found safety in. you were in mating press, your thighs were rubbing against the skin of your stomach. loud gross sounds of skin slapping and wet pussy filled the room, he was filling you up. you let out loud unstable moans as he ruined you. his face was stuffed into the crook of your neck as he bit and nipped at it harshly. leaving dark bruises and hickeys on it as he kept slamming into you. your felt sweat dribble from your forehead as your eyes rolled to the back of your head. it felt. so good. you could hear him panting, louder and louder as his dick was hitting places you couldn't dream of reaching on your own. it hurt a lot, it felt like you were going to get split open any second now but..the pleasure..the pleasure of your pain and of his thick cock was flooding your brain. you'd worry about the pain later.. "fuck you look so hot when your insides are getting blown out" he grips at your neck, hard as he fucks you like a ragdoll. your hands fly to his, gripping and clawing at his hand. an attempt to unblock your airway, to no avail. his movements started to get rabid and sloppy, he was close. you knew he was. he let go of your neck, leaving a faint bruise due to his grip before he slapped your cheek again. the stinging, it only got worse. you felt like every inch of your body was getting ruined and beat. and truthfully, you loved it. "fuuu- fuuck.. sir- i- fuck..m' gonna cum! m' close! please let me cum! please please please!" your words were fast and sloppy, you were close, you needed to cum you needed it. he spat on your face again, making you feel like a disgusting piece of meat..but you loved it. you wanted to make him proud. he took his left hand and started to rub your clit as he slammed into you. each time it got faster and faster. "cum for me baby, show me how much you love my cock..fuuck.." you arched your back against the bed as it started to make a loud annoying squeaking sound from the rapid movements on it. "fu- ah~! fuckfuckfuckfuck yes yes please ah more more please ah ouh..~" your loud moans filled the room as you came all over his cock, leaving a white ring of sticky substance at the base of his dick. shortly after he came inside of you, filling you up with cum with a loud(ish) grunt. he didn't stop though, he kept moving, not only to help you out your high but to bring you to another. this man doesn't intend to stop until youre full of bruises and unable to walk..
Another note: I REALLY HOPE THIS IS GOOD, I fr spent all day on this (started at 8am, its already 8pm rn omfg) I hope I portrayed his character well, idk if I made him too mean or tame or wtv idk hshshhs, reqs are open!! pls check blog rules before u send them though:)
TAGLIST: @pollys-doublelife @gongyoosgf
#ᡣ𐭩 saymio#squid game x y/n#squid game 2#send reqs#squid game#squid game fanfic#squid game x reader#squid game x you#the sales man x reader#the salesman#smut#squid game smut#x reader#dead dove fic#dead dove do not eat#mdni#fanfic#prob ooc#not proofread
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Every breath you take (I'll be watching you) - Ekko x reader
(Ekko POV)
wc: 4k
ekko travels to another timeline. he experiences a glimpse of what could've been. maybe in another life.
warnings: angst
Ekko knew he was somewhere he was not supposed to be. He was in Zaun, but...he was not. This Zaun was something that looked like it came out a fairytale. It was not drowned in the chaos of the undercity. It was not darkened by the gloomy fog that existed ever since he came into this world, haunting him every day. He was not in Zaun. Of this, he was certain.
Because how else would you explain the sight in front of him? In front of his eyes stood six figures from his miserable past. Benzo, Vander, Mylo, Claggor, Powder and…you. But it wasn't possible. The former four were dead. Powder was no longer Powder, but Jinx and you..
You were his biggest mistake. His biggest regret. His biggest what if? He loathed you and loved you all the same. His enemy and his greatest love.
You looked wrong. God, you looked so right. You were smiling. He could see your pearly white teeth. He could see the crinkle of your eyes. He could hear the melodic tune of your laughter. You were happy and bright, not at all like the girl he knew, the one he fought tooth and nail to kill in his timeline. You were beautiful. You had always been but there was a special spark in your eyes now. The one he wanted to capture a picture of and etch it deep in his heart. The one he hoped would never leave you.
He snapped out of his daze once he noticed your eyes on him. Your eyes seemed awaiting. You had asked him something. He rubbed his neck a little sheepishly. “What were we talking about again?”
You chewed at the straw of the drink Vander had poured you. Ekko watched you.
"Your competition. It’s in two days.”
Ekko blinked, trying to hide his confusion. “R-right. The competition.” He cleared his throat, racking his brain for what possible ‘competition’ his other self couldve signed up for. He prayed you wouldn't ask for progress updates.
You blew air through the straw, watching it bubble at the drink. Ekko watched you.
“You ready?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” he said, trying to hide the tension in his voice. He had no idea what the competition was for. He’d have to play along till he finds out. “You coming to watch?” he asked, trying to hide his nervousness as he eyed you.
You plopped your head at the bar table and turned to face him with a cheeky grin. “Course. I’d be a shitty girlfriend if I didn’t.”
Ekko’s heart skipped a beat. He hadn't expected that—girlfriend. This other version of himself had everything. His friends, his home, you. He swallowed, shoving aside the mixture of feelings swirling in his chest. “You’re not shitty,” he mumbled. ‘You’re perfect.”
You smiled softly as you weakly punched him. ‘I was joking.”
He playfully winced at the hit, but a smile pulled at the corner of his mouth. “I know, I know.”
Ekko reached out to grab your hand, idly running his thumb along the back of it. His eyes darted around, taking in everything about you– your smile, your every gesture, your laugh, your eyes. He hadn’t expected to feel so jealous of his doppelganger.
You noticed his dazed state and gently gripped his hands. “You alright babe?”
Ekko paused for a moment, the weight of the question hanging in the air. He wanted to tell you everything. He wanted to spill out his guts to you. He was in the wrong timeline. This was not his world. He was not your Ekko. Yet, he couldn't bring himself to say it.
He settled for a forced smile. “Yeah. Just nervous about the competition, I guess,”
You pulled yourself up and grasped at the straw, delicately placed it in your mouth. Ekko watched you. “No way. You and Powder have been working on it for months. You’re gonna crush it,”
There. That feeling again–that pang of jealousy mixed with guilt at the mention of ‘Powder’ that spilled so casually from your lips. He had lost that chance to know her in his world. Here, she was a shining memory, not the monster he knew.
Ekko forced a nod, trying to hide the way his jaw tensed. ‘Yeah,” he muttered. ‘I know. I just..I don't want to disappoint you, y’know?”
You smiled at him softly. “You know you could never do that.”
Those words hit harder than he expected, a pang of longing in his chest. This other version of himself had everything he’d ever wanted, everything that had been stolen from him. He swallowed, fighting back the tightness in his throat.
“Yeah. I know.”
He gave your hand a gentle squeeze, letting the moment linger between them. For a brief moment, he let himself imagine what it would be like to stay in this timeline, to forget about everything else and just… be.
Ekko took a deep breath as you turned to continue conversation with Mylo, Claggor and Powder, finally allowing him to truly take in what's around him. Old memories flashed through his mind. Powder was smiling, blissfully innocent, like the timeline itself was protecting her from becoming Jinx. Mylo looked less brooding, and Claggor stood beside him with a smile.
It was strange, seeing them like this. They were so young, so carefree—the opposite of how he’d seen them last.
Vander handed out drinks, a fatherly smile on his face. It was odd, seeing him alive and well, like the past hadn’t chewed him up and spat him out. Benzo sat next to him, chuckling away at something. Ekko doesn't know how he doesn't burst into tears every time from the sight of him.
He was still waiting for somebody to slap him out of his daydream. They were all alive. Powder was innocent. You were at his side. This world… it was like a sick twist of fate, dangling everything he’d lost right in front of him, then snatching it away. It was a bittersweet reminder of all the friends and family he had lost in his own timeline.
He accepted the drink with a nod of thanks, taking a sip as he half-listened to the conversation around them. Ekko couldn’t help but observe how at ease everyone seemed. There was none of the tension or the edge that came from surviving on the streets of Zaun. They were safe. They were happy.
Ekko found himself getting lost in your laughter, the sound melodic and full of genuine joy. It made him ache. The more he saw of this life that wasn’t his, the more he wanted it.
Claggor nudged Ekko to snap him out of his daydream. “Oi. Quit that loverboy.”
Ekko snapped out of his dazed staring, a flush of embarrassment creeping onto his cheeks. He had been caught—staring at you like a lovesick puppy. Claggor’s comment made the others chuckle, including you, and Ekko couldn't help but admire how magical you looked at every moment.
“Shut up,” Ekko muttered, shoving Claggor lightly. “I can look at my girlfriend if I want to.”
You chuckled at Claggor and beamed at him and Ekko felt his heart skip a beat, the happiness in your smile hitting him like a punch to the gut. He smiled back, though his was tinged with a hint of melancholy.
Every moment he spent here, every smile and laugh from you, felt like a taunt. This world wasn’t meant for him. He was an intruder, someone who didn’t belong. Yet, he couldn’t help but wish he could stay in this world forever, surrounded by friends and with you in his life.
The night sky appeared, and Powder sneakily tweaked the the speaker to play some tunes that Vander deemed ‘not age appropriate’. As he tried to figure how to ‘turn that darned thing off’, Powder, with the knowledge he would not be able to do so, pulled Claggor and Mylo to the dance floor and moved with the music, laughing and giggling at the horrid moves Claggor was exhibiting and the pathetic attempt of flirting Mylo was once again torturing the poor waitress with.
He watched them, his mind a swirling mess of emotions. This world… it was everything he had ever wanted, yet so far out of reach.
He took a long swig of his drink, trying to drown out the ache in his chest. If he looked at you any longer, he was going to do something he knew he’d regret—something like stealing you away from this perfect world and bringing you into his messed-up one.
Soon after, you stood up and extended your hand towards him, bowing slightly, with a grin on your face, “Care to indulge me, my good sir?”
He looked down at your outstretched hand, warring emotions in his eyes. Part of him wanted to take it, to let himself get lost in the dance with you. The other part knew it would only make the inevitable hurt worse.
But looking into your eyes, seeing the happiness and the innocence there, he couldn’t resist the pull.
“Yeah,” he chuckled, standing up. “I’d love to.”
Powder noticed movement from the corner of her eye and swiftly rushed to the speaker where Vander was still fixing it or rather just yelled and hoped it listened. Powder ignored Vander's protests and changed the song to one of a slow dance and grinned to herself. She held up her fist expectantly, and Vander watched your figure dragging Ekko to the floor and smiled slightly as he formed a fist of his own and bumped it against hers. Pinching her cheek soon after.
Ekko followed you to the dance floor, allowing himself to be led by your hand. As you reached the center, he hesitantly wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close against him. He was acutely aware of how right it felt to have you this close, your body pressed against his.
He moved with the music, though it was clear he was a little clumsy compared to this body’s natural rhythm.
Despite it all, Ekko found himself grinning, laughing as you both stumbled through the dance together. It was far from elegant, both of you occasionally tripping over each other's feet or losing the beat.
Yet, in that moment, none of it mattered. It was the most fun he'd had in a long time. He was dancing with you, holding you close, and just for that single moment, all his worries seemed to fade away.
Once the song ended, Ekko suggested leaving the crowded dance floor. The noise and the dancing had become too much for him, and he needed a moment to clear his head.
He led you up to the rooftop, the cool night air a gentle breeze against your faces. The view from up here was breathtaking, the city lights below like a sea of stars against the darkened city.
You smiled as you interlocked your hand with his, recalling a fond memory. “Remember Ekko? Here's where you confessed. Here's where I became your girlfriend 5 years ago.”
He chuckled, a fond yet bittersweet smile tugging at his lips. “How could I forget?”
Here was where, in this timeline, this version of himself had confessed his feelings for you. He could imagine it—the nervous energy, the hope in his heart, the pounding of his own heart in his ears. But that wasn’t him. Those memories, those moments—they belonged to the Ekko of this timeline. Not him.
He tried to ignore the pang of jealousy in his chest as he looked at you.
“It was sunny. So bright. Like the sun had come out just for us.”
He closed his eyes, picturing the scene. Sun rays streaming down, a soft, gentle breeze, and a clear sky overhead. A perfect day, a perfect moment.
He could see it in his mind's eye—the other Ekko, confessing his feelings to you here under the sun's warm glow. The jealousy clawed at his heart once more.
"Yeah.”
You gently pulled him forward to seat yourselves at the edge of the roof. Ekko watched the city lights below, making the buildings look surreal and dream-like. He leaned back, the cool night air a soft caress against his skin.
His mind was still a tangled mess of thoughts, his feelings for you and his guilt for being here mixing in a confusing jumble. But sitting here, this close to you, he couldn’t force himself to pull away.
You watched the city life below, dangling your feet, making it hit the wall back and forth. You don't look up as you ask, “You're not my Ekko, are you?”
Ekko's heart dropped, the words hitting him like a punch to the gut. He closed his eyes, his breath catching in his chest. He had tried so hard to keep it a secret, to pretend like everything was fine.
But you had seen through him. You knew.
He didn't say anything for a moment, the silence between you hanging heavy. Then, finally, he spoke, his voice barely above a whisper, "No. I'm not.”
You don't look up from where you watched your feet dance in the air. The silence hung heavy between you both, each in your own thoughts. Ekko's mind whirled, his heart aching at the fact that you had figured him out. He had wanted to keep pretending, to enjoy this one moment for just a bit longer.
He swallowed, his fingers clenching and unclenching where they rested against the rooftop. "How did you know?"
“It was raining the day you confessed to me.”
Ekko's heart clenched at the words. It was a small, seemingly insignificant detail, but it was enough to give him away. He hadn't even noticed that, amidst the tangle of feelings and memories he was trying to keep straight. Well, memories that weren't even his. He looked down at his hands, his fingers clenching tighter against the edge of the rooftop. He felt exposed, naked in a way that he didn’t like.
"Yeah," he finally whispered. "It was.”
You gripped at the floor where your hands were resting and Ekko could see the hesitation in your face as you asked a question.
“Who are you then?”
He paused, debating on what to say. He could lie, make up some convoluted story. But looking at you, seeing the curiosity in your eyes, he knew it would be a pointless lie. So, he took a deep breath, and for the first time, he confessed the truth.
"I'm Ekko. Just not the one you know. I'm from a different timeline. A different Zaun.”
Your eyes widened as realisation sunk in. “Parallel realities. They're…real.”
He nodded, the reality of it still sinking in for him. Parallel realities, alternate timelines. He'd known they existed in theory, but to experience it... it was something else.
"Yeah," he said quietly. "A little hard to believe, right?”
For the first since you sat down and fixed your eyes down, you lifted your eyes to look at him, a soft smile gracing your face. “Not really. I'm looking at it.”
He chuckled at that, a small laugh of disbelief. Here you were, accepting the impossible so easily, while he was still struggling to wrap his mind around it.
He looked at you, that soft smile on your face, and his heart ached. Everything about this world was so perfect, so right. And here he was, an intruder from another timeline.
‘You know me in your world then?,” you asked, fiddling with your fingers.
He nodded, his eyes looking out at the city below again. He imagined his own Zaun, so different from this one. The streets were darker, the sky a permanent ashen grey, and you...
He swallowed, forcing down the sudden wave of emotions that threatened to overwhelm him.
“Yeah. I do. You and I… we’re…” he trailed off, unsure how to explain the tangled mess of your relationship in his timeline.
“Are we not on good terms?”
He winced at that, the question making his stomach churn with guilt. In his timeline, things were complicated. "Good" was a generous way to describe it.
He took a moment to find the right words, not wanting to hurt you any more than he already had.
"It’s... complicated. Things between us... they’re messed up in my Zaun. We’re on the worst of terms,” he mumbled. “We... we’ve spent years apart. We haven’t seen each other for a long time. And when we do, it’s always a fight.”
“Oh,” you whispered, tone inexplicably sad.
His heart twisted, seeing the sadness in your expression. It hurt, knowing that he had caused it, even if indirectly.
He reached out, his hand hovering over yours. He wanted to touch you, to offer comfort, but he stopped himself at the last second. He didn’t deserve to give you comfort.
You noticed his hesitance and gently huffed as you took his hand in yours. He sucked in a breath as you took his hands, the simple act sending a shockwave through his body.
Your hands felt warm, small, and familiar against his. He closed his eyes, taking a moment to just feel you, to remember what it was like to touch you like this. He missed it so damn much.
He held your hands tightly, his fingers wrapping around yours. He didn’t want to let go.
You gripped his hand as you posed the question. “Do you…like the me of that world?”
He chuckled at that, the question making his chest ache.
Did he like you? Like was such an inadequate word to describe what he felt. He loved you. He always had. He’d been in love with you since they were kids. Even in his timeline, where things were so messed up. Even there, he still loved you desperately.
“I do,” he admitted quietly. “I like you so much, it hurts."
Ekko watched you bit your lip and stared down at the city sadly as you asked a question you didn't really want the answer to.
“Do I….like you back?”
The question felt like a punch to the gut.
He knew the response he should give, the truth behind the relationship between him and you in his timeline. It was a mess. A complicated, painful mess of feelings. Of love, hate, and betrayal. Of trust broken and hearts shattered.
He swallowed, his hands clenching tighter around yours. The answer was on the tip of his tongue, and he hated himself for saying it.
“No,” he whispered. “You don’t.”
The sadness in your expression, the way your eyes closed to hide the hurt, it was like a knife to his chest. He wanted nothing more than to take it back, to tell you everything was fine, that you loved him too. But he couldn’t. It was the truth, and lying wouldn’t change that.
He looked away, his eyes back on the city lights, the brightness suddenly blurring in his vision. Damn it, he should have never come here.
“Ekko.”
Hearing you say his name, in that soft, gentle voice, made something in him crack. He looked back at you, his eyes meeting yours.
“Yeah?” he asked, his voice quiet and strained.
You turned your gaze from the night life to his eyes as you hesitantly asked, “Do you…want to kiss me?”
The question took him by surprise, jolting through him like an electric shock. He had wanted to kiss you, yes. For years, he’d desired to kiss you, to touch you, to have you closer. He’d dreamt of it, yearned for it, ached for it.
The word was out before he could stop himself.
“Yes.”
So you slowly moved forward and gently placed your lips against his. Time seemed to slow, the world around you fading into a muffled hum. His lips brushed against yours, featherlight at first, testing, savoring. The contact sent a shiver down your spine, warmth spreading from where you touched and radiating outward.
The kiss deepened naturally, an unhurried exploration of emotions he'd kept bottled for too long. His hand slid to your waist, pulling you closer while your fingers tangled in his locks. It was soft yet searing, a meeting of hearts that spoke in a language words could never capture.
When you finally parted, you rested your forehead against yours, breaths mingling, staring at his eyes, so rich of love and guilt. “You won't be staying, will you?”
The question broke through the fog in his mind, bringing him back to reality. The kiss had been perfect, but it was a lie, a false hope. He knew he couldn’t stay. He wasn’t supposed to be here.
He swallowed, his eyes glued to the ground, unable to meet your gaze.
“No,” he whispered. “I won’t be staying. My Zaun...it needs me.”
You smile sadly as you whispered, “I hope…the me there changes her mind.”
At that, he chuckled bitterly. You, changing your mind? The thought was laughable. He loved you, but even he knew that ship had sailed.
But seeing the sorrow in your expression, the hope in your eyes, he couldn’t bring himself to tell you. He couldn’t snuff out that hope, that last shred of optimism you still had.
“Yeah,” he said, forcing a smile. “I hope she does too.”
You slowly pulled your hand up to caress his face, fingers moving across the soft skin of his flesh. The tenderness of your touch, the way your hand against his cheek, it sent a shiver through him. He closed his eyes, letting himself lean into your hand, to relish that feeling for as long as he could. It soothed the ache in his heart, that constant, aching longing for you.
“You deserve happiness Ekko.”
He placed his hand over yours, gently holding it to his face. “So do you, you deserve the world,” he mumbled.
You smiled sorrowfully as you watched Ekko. “You might not be the Ekko of this world, but you... you still have the same stupid hair. Same stupid eyes. Same...stupid smile. Same stupid heart. You're still my Ekko. I hope you can you can get your happy ending there.”
His breath caught at your words. It was too much. It was everything he'd been aching for, everything he wanted to hear.
He opened his eyes, looking at you, his heart clenching. A part of him wanted to tell you everything. To spill the truth of what the two of you had become in his timeline. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t do that to you, not when you were looking at him like that.
He played with your hands, traced hearts on your palm.
"I'll try," he said softly.
You smiled at him and he mirrored your smile, his heart aching. He didn’t want this moment to end, he wanted to just stay here, with you, like this.
But the inevitable was closing in. The longer he stayed, the harder it would be to leave. He needed to go, needed to get back to his timeline before things got worse.
He took a deep breath, steeling his resolve. “I have to go now, don’t I?” he whispered.
Ekko watched as tears welled up in your eyes as you chuckled a sad laugh. “I think so.”
Seeing the tears in your eyes, hearing the acceptance in your voice, it took all his self-control not to pull you closer, to hold you to him. But he forced himself to stay still, even as every part of him wanted to keep you within arm's reach.
He closed his eyes, letting out a shaky sigh. "Yeah," he whispered. "I think so too.”
You suddenly pull him into a hug, wrapping your arms around him and he couldn’t hold back anymore. He closed his eyes, returning the embrace, hugging you tightly against him.
He buried his face against your hair, taking a deep breath, trying to commit this moment to memory. He didn’t know if he’d ever get to hold you like this again.
You place a soft kiss on his cheek. “ I won't ever forget you.”
The feeling of your lips on his cheek, it was too much. He held onto you tighter, like if he let go, he'd lose you forever.
He swallowed the lump in his throat, trying to keep his voice steady. “I won’t forget you either. I couldn’t even if I wanted to.”
Every instinct in him was screaming to keep holding you, to not let go, but he forced himself to release his hold. He looked at you one last time, taking in your sad smile, before steeling himself and stepping back.
He took another deep breath, his heart heavy with the weight of all the things left unsaid. “Goodbye.”
“Goodbye Ekko. Smile some more, hm?"
Ekko felt a mix of emotions well up within him. He wanted to say so much, to tell you not to hope for his happiness, that he wouldn't find it. But the words stuck in his throat.
He managed a strained smile, but it didn't reach his eyes. “Yeah. Take care of yourself,” he said quietly.
He took one last look at you, the image of you standing there, sad but beautiful, seared into his mind.
With that, he turned and walked away, his footsteps growing fainter as he left you there, alone on the rooftop.
You turned your gaze towards the night life of the undercity and huffed a sad sigh as you turned your gazed up at the moon.
Ekko had decided to stop in his tracks and hide behind a wall so he can watch you one last time. The moon illuminated your features beautifully and although the smile on your face was one full of melancholy, Ekko could only find it in himself admire your beauty and mirrored a similar smile of his own.
Ekko watched you. He always had. That's all he can do.
—--- Epilogue
When Ekko returned to his timeline, it felt like he'd stepped into a world of shadows, a dark and menacing realm. The familiar alleys, the broken streets, it all looked so different, so wrong.
He trudged his way back to the Firelights base, his mind still focused on the you he left behind in the other timeline. The feeling of holding you, having you so close, it was like a fresh wound, reopening the aching loneliness within him.
He stood for a moment, to stare at the moon, to remember the image of you staring at the sky mere moments ago when he caught a flash of something from the corner of his eyes. Ekko watched you fall to your death.
Ekko watched you. He always had. That's all he can do.
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Oh god. Now I'm empty headed exept thinking about how trails gone cold au Etho is haunted in every way possible. He looks like a ghost, he acts like a ghost of his past self and he's constantly haunted by memories, nightmares and regrets..
I imagine the urge to return to the cave would've been so irresistible at times that Gem would have to like. Monitor him. Like a child. And sit him down, and talk sence into him, and take his keys
Poor guy :(
YOU GET IT YOU GET IT
i imagine at first it was very difficult to exist in their house, too quiet, too obvious that pearl and tango are gone. no more laughter, no more random noises, no more random singing. and etho just sat there, wallowing in grief, trying to process that they really are not coming back now. because it's a hard thing to grasp, that one day someone was here and now they're just poof, gone. reliving their time in the cave and spiraling endlessly for what he could've done differently until he has a meltdown. because the guilt and loss and panic are all too much...
and gem is there to help him calm down and bring him back to earth, but there's not much she can do to ease his pain. she's in pain too, but she has to be strong for etho. because yes he's like a child. etho probably realizes the state he's in and he hates to be a burden, but he can't help it, not yet at least.
also this made me think, so have a doodle
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