#but we can't help but just be so so grateful- s' been a tough year- it honestly has. Feeling unsafe- mentally drained has been the toughest

[scuddle-bubble101]

Last update from us for this night/day (Its early lol)

People are just awesome you know? Its not everyday it is said and we try to keep what is said and learned close to heart but, people are just great. Nothing sarcastic about it, I'm so honored to have met and enjoyed each day with any person or individual who comes by our little small world. It warms our hearts really and lets us abide back from the constant mental crises we go through nearly daily. I'm grateful to have this, I'm grateful to have you and I hope we all can keep being awesome and enjoy the rest of this year at our own pace. We got this! Keep going, you will get through this! I believe in you!<3

[twobluejeans]

HEARTBREAK ON TOUR!

charles leclerc x famous!reader

summary: in which the lavender haze has been lifted. or in which america’s it couple splits.

part 10: xoxo, barbie series masterlist

faceclaim: madison beer

ally’s radio 📻: PART 10! i recommend listening to marjorie by taylor swift to this chapter so u feel the vibe.

TWITTER, july 19

INSTAGRAM, july 19

liked by camilamorrone, lewishamilton, and 6,348,164 others

yourinstagram just wrapped up the european leg of the Eras Tour, and my heart is bursting with gratitude and emotion. this journey has been an extraordinary one, and i couldn't have asked for a more incredible audience to share it with. 

last night, we closed out this chapter in the city where my mother was born, and i have no words to express how special it was. the energy, the love, and the connection we shared in that moment made it the best show of my life.

to everyone who came out to the shows, sang along, danced, and created memories with us, thank you from the bottom of my heart. your passion and support have been the driving force behind every performance, and i’m endlessly grateful for the moments we've shared together. 

this tour has been a journey of self-rediscovery and growth, and i’m so lucky to have such an amazing team by my side. the dedication, creativity, and hard work they've poured into every detail have made this experience truly magical. 

as we move forward to the next leg of the tour, i carry with me the love and warmth of each city we've visited. your energy and enthusiasm have fueled my spirit, and i can't wait to see where the Eras Tour takes us next. 

from the bottom of my heart, thank you for being a part of this adventure. let’s continue to make memories, share moments, and celebrate the magic of music together. here's to the journey ahead! 🦋🫧

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INSTAGRAM, july 20

yourstory 8h

viewed by henrycavill, aarontaylorjohnson, and 4,563,134 others

yourstory 8h

viewed by carlossainz, gretagerwing, and 4,17,123 others

INSTAGRAM, july 20

liked by landomybbgirl, f1ewis, and 612,122 others

enews click link in bio to read everything we know so far about the controversy that is y/n l/n’s and charles leclerc’s breakup.

View all 123 comments

dutchverstappen_ n e ways…

ripy/nsferrariera CAUSE KARMA IS MY BFFFF

leclerc16ferrari i love charles but to say this isn’t well deserved would be lying 💀

INSTGRAM STORIES, july 20

yourstory 58m

viewed by rudeth, badbunnypr, and 1,578,193 others

yourstory 28m

viewed by landonoriss, authurleclerc, and 643,183 others

TWITTER, july 20

INSTAGRAM july 21

liked by selenagomez, ana_d_armas, and 9,449,167 others

yourinstagram happy birthday to my guardian angel! today, as i celebrate another year of life, i can't help but remember the incredible woman who brought me into this world. we share the same birthday, and though you're not physically here with me, i feel your presence in every beat of my heart.it’s been 15 years since you left us, but your love, guidance, and beautiful spirit have never faded from my life. you were not just my mom; you were my best friend, my confidante, and my rock. losing you at the age of 12 was the most challenging thing i’ve ever faced, but i’ve carried your strength and love with me every step of the way.you were there for all my firsts - my first day of school, my first dance recital, my first guitar lesson. you taught me kindness, compassion, and the importance of staying true to myself. your unwavering support and belief in me still resonates deeply, even when life feels overwhelming. i often find myself looking up at the night sky, knowing that you're shining down as one of the brightest stars. your light continues to guide me, reminding me that no matter how tough life gets, i have your love to carry me through.so, here's to you, mom - the strongest, most beautiful soul i’ve ever known. thank you for being my guardian angel and for making every birthday feel like a celebration of your love and spirit.

wishing i could hug u one last time,

your y/n/n. 🤍

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fernandoalonso she’s watching over you and she’s so proud of how far you come. she’s by your side always, front row at all of your concerts. forever with you wherever you go, your guardian angel

bellahadid she’s so proud of u, babe. we all are 🖤

sabrinacarpenter happy birthday 💗

TWITTER, july 21

INSTAGRAM, july 21

liked by tchalamet, carlossainz, and 15,732,135 others

yourinstagram oh god, i’ve cried at least 3 times trying to type this so hopefully fourth times the charm.

as i take a moment to reflect on my unforgettable journey on the set of Barbie, my heart is overflowing with emotions. i can't help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the incredible opportunity i was given and the remarkable people who made it all possible. 

to the extraordinary visionary, greta gerwing, thank you for trusting me with the role of Barbie and for guiding me through this artistic voyage. barbie played a big role in my life as a little girl, i adored every barbie film series and for you to chose me as you barbie is something i will always be in debt to you for. your passion and creativity was infectious, and i’m forever grateful for the chance to collaborate with such a talented director. the experience has left an indelible mark on my soul. 

and to my lovely cast-mates, fellow Barbies, and Kens, you are the heart and soul of this film. each one of you brought a unique and irreplaceable energy to the set, and i in awe of your dedication and talent. together, we laughed, cried, and supported one another, creating a bond that will last a lifetime. thank you for being my rock on-screen and off-screen. you are my true stars. ⭐️

 the memories we've made during the filming process will forever be etched in my heart. from the exhilarating moments of shooting magical scenes to the heartwarming conversations behind the scenes, every single second has been a treasure. the friendships that blossomed during this journey are the kind that go beyond the silver screen, and i feel incredibly blessed to have shared this chapter with each one of you. 

i can't help but be proud of what we've created together. the love, effort, and dedication poured into Barbie shine through every frame. it’s my hope that this film will not only entertain but also inspire and touch the hearts of all who watch it. i want each person to experience the same excitement and joy that filled my heart while bringing Barbie to life.

thank you to the entire production team, crew members, and everyone behind the scenes for your tireless efforts in making this dream come true. your passion and commitment to the project have been awe-inspiring, and i’m forever grateful for your hard work and dedication. 🙏

so here's to Barbie and to all of you who made it an unforgettable adventure. let’s spread its magic far and wide, and may it bring joy and wonder to audiences around the world. thank you, from the depths of my heart, for being a part of this incredible journey. i love you all! 

BARBIE is out now in theaters everywhere. 💕

View all 234,123 comments

dualipa 🎀💞

fernandoalonso_offical Felicidades cariño, estoy increíblemente orgullosa de ti. Te extraño

sabrinacarpenter i’m sick of kens i need an alan

yourinstagram sabrinacarpenter agreed.

gretagerwing Fourth pic 🥹 my babies!! Love you Guys!!

americaferrira obsessed with you and your performance! can’t wait for everyone to see it

florencepugh IVE RETURNED A CHANGED WOMAN AFTER WATCHING BARBIE

y/nsreputation she’s in her barbie era

lolaransdell_fan33 am i the only one who thought ryan gosling was kinda too old to play ken? like the age difference between y/n and him is weird too💀

yourinstagram lolaransdell_fan33 he was and is kenough.

robertdowneyjr Proud of you, kiddo. Anyways, go watch Oppenheimer in theaters today 🖤💣

yourinstagram robertdowneyjr how do i pin this comment??

TWITTER, july 21

ally’s radio 📻: YASS WE LOVE TO SEE IT!!!!! what r our thoughts?

@incoherenciass@dakotali@405rry@topaz125@sassyheroneckgiant@hevburn@itsmytimetoodream@ivegotparticulartaste@crowdedimagines @asterianax @haydee5010@scenesofobx@christinabae@magical-spit@dessxoxsworld@myareadsbooks@honethatty12@hopefulinlove@diasnohibng@gentlemonsterjennie1@hummusxx@eugene-emt-roe@taestrwbrry @perjarma @cxcewg@chimchimjiminie16@glow-ish@allywthsr @millyswife@mrsmaybank13@black-swan-blog27 @stargaryenx@lilsiz@ohthemisssery@leclerclvr

[cant-get-no-worse]

I’ve been really struggling to connect to the new team the past few years, but I gotta say, players like Pedri, Gavi, and Araujo have made it easier, especially this season. There’s just something about Pedri and Gavi specifically that makes me excited; I feel like the two of them are destined for Barca greatness and I am genuinely excited to witness it, even if a large part of me still misses our old teams, and am still painfully dealing with the loss of Leo

‼️ this :)

I had a tough time especially starting after 2018 (Iniesta's departure acted a shift in the team); I connected less and less with the teams from 2018 to 2021 until, subsequently, Leo's own departure. Felt like 3/4 of the players on the pitch were randoms. Youngsters from La Masia (Gavi) or outsiders just as passionate about the club (Araujo, Pedri) brought a genuine wind of youth and sense of reconnection with the supporters within the team. It is really interesting to observe, starting with the shirts' sales.

I too can't help but compare this current team with the olders; who can forget the incomparable feeling of winning a Treble with a home-grown team like the 2011 squad? Who can forget the familiarity, the stupendous chemistry of the 2011's? The fun, deadliness and warmth of the 2015's one? The insane dreams brought by the 2017's? Who can forget the people who wore their numbers to give us glory? I still read Messi when I see the 10, I still think of Xavi or Andrés in the 6 and 8, Busquets 5, Alba, even fucking Piqué, Alves or Luis. I never trusted any other team that these, and thankfully, those are not meant to be forgotten, rather cherished. But they are also meant to make way for new memories. It isn't fair to no one to cling on to it. We went through a very tough period, results-wise, institutionnaly-wise and team-wise, and we are now getting our head out of the water. Number change hands.

Players like Pedri, Gavi, Araujo have this kind of eerie familiarity, homeliness, like seeing them in Blaugrana just feels right. I like our fellow players very much, but these three do stand out as fitting with the crest, belonging to the colors and the club, it's quite strange. Some feeling I used to only get with a couple of other names. As you said, they help us find this love for this team again, but also, and maybe most of all, the trust. I fall in love with the team all over again when I see Gavi kiss that crest fiercely; and I realize I trust him to fight for each ball regardless of the score. I fall in love when Pedri produces his selfless ever-growing talent in the midfield, and I realize I trust him to inject the dynamism to run to that goal. I fall in love when I see Araujo defending the colors , and I realize I trust him to take on any winger. I realize Ansu is still a kid of 20 years of age, and I hope I can begin to trust him too, as with Frenkie, MTS, Lewandowski, Christensen, Baldé, Koundé, and every other player in the squad. It's just a question of time before these names become as familiar to me, and to the supporters, as all the names before them.

Trusting a team & genuinely liking each of its player is a process of time. And these time of players make me genuinely so damn excited to see them grow wearing our colors and improve their chemistry, talent and the team altogether, and I can only be so grateful we have them hopefully for many years to come. i know gavi aint leaving unless we kick him by the boots (remind u of anyone much?) so i'm quite sure about it but i aint lying when i say if pedri goes elsewhere it will crush me cause be fr They now gotta ciment their place and work together to get to the top — next season is going to be so fun, for players and supporters alike. ❤️

[joe-england]

Reminiscing

This is an old picture, drawn way back in 2014.  Almost ten years, then.  It still applies!  I'm still so grateful you're all here, willing to help this clumsy semi-functional cartoonist out.  Sometimes it feels like most of that time's passed overnight, slipping by like a breeze.  But not this last year.  2023 has felt like one of the longest years of my life.

Like I've said, there've been a lot of family matters demanding my attention.  I guess I could blame my lack of progress partly on those obligations pulling my time.  But I don't really want to blame anything right now, or make excuses, or beat myself up like I usually do, or think about the tough stuff, and how it's probably not going to get any easier any time soon.  I want to be glad for what I've gotten, the steps we've made.  A lot of it thanks to you!  I want to look forward to things.  And there is a lot to look forward to.  Witch Warp is calling next year.  I insist.  I think I was waiting for the perfect premier date, and I can't imagine a better day than February 29th.  Get it?  It's warpy!

But obligations are calling at the moment, I don't even have time to write much.  I was hoping to have some nice new picture finished, but that'll have to wait.  Right now I just want to wish you a very happy holiday, whatever you celebrate, whether or not you celebrate, and hope for all the best for all of us today and tomorrow.  It's crazy out there, and we need all that good hope and love that we can get.  So thanks so much for being here, and for being you.  And if 2023's tragedies have hit close to your home, then let's find a better new year soon, together.

Doctors Without Borders

Save the Children

Alliance for Middle East Peace

- Joe

[shawnjacksonsbs]

Choose.

And there's no law that says I can't change the way I teach.

It's necessary, at times. 6-24-23

"You are who you choose to be." - Hogarth Hughes

That means them, you, and me.

Even the best jugglers can get tripped up. You ever see one of those juggling acts where they have a random person continually throw balls into the rotation?

There's a reason they stop at the number they do. Maybe it's 8, or 15, or 20. It's pretty awe-inspiring, too. But they stop because they haven't trained for that next one. Whether they could do it is a matter of faith and training.

If they did add one more and it all tumbled, would it take away from how good they just were 5 seconds before with one less ball in the mix?

It shouldn't.

It’s still pretty badass. . .what they did do. And they can come back later, renewed, and practiced up to do it better than before.

Tough jobs and spills don't disqualify anyone. As a matter of fact, those are prerequisites for being human. Just sayin'.

Examples that fuel the reverse of growth, but only in my head-sometimes;

Long hours, hard work, and regular boss shit doesn’t get to count in my regurgitated emotional healing cycle, so. . .

Things like, finding out that most “turmoil” and “grief” we get from customers generally seem to come from doing work for “our” people. Weird right? Strangers, the ones that should be skeptical of contractors give us way less trust issues.

But we live and learn and, still being in our 1st year at Pride Fence means wrapping our arms all the way around learning curves and life lessons! Lol no lol The difference between the words proposal and estimate will help, and signed contracts, signed change orders, and initialed drawings etc., etc. Remaining professional in the interim, is as difficult as those days are long. Lol No really.

The irony found in renting a trailer to haul material to a few jobs, because the job I was to start got postponed and none of the others were ready to go, (for good reason), so I decide on picking up enough 1x6x5s for both jobs only to find out that a typo “had occurred” and the majority of those pickets were supposed to be 1x6x6s.

Into stock they go.

Running out of room for material overflow, plus the remaining pickets would have fit on my truck, but at least the trailer wasn’t a total loss because I need to haul a tear out off-site.

“What?”

“The customer doesn’t want us to do that today either?”

“Damn, Ok”

Trailer was rented for no reason, after all. Lol

We work with what got, right? Find things to be grateful for. I did save 2 hours of drive time by not doing the tear out. That’s a win, and the rest we learnt from. Win/win Eh, will call it a draw.

I can remember calling days like these, bad. "Had a bad day" or "having a bad day", and back then they might've been. . .bad days.

We changed all that nonsense, though. We call them tough days now, or maybe difficult. I have plenty of tough days, but they damn sure ain't bad, not really.

You come find me in a year or 2 or even in a few months and ask me if I had any bad days, bet I say no. Hell I probably won't even remember having consecutive tough days.

It's one of the things I do that helps me with my acceptance and my perception of life.

Several tough days can wear on you though and in the moment(s) I can lose focus to remain. . .here (at peace).

Tired is another thing I wear all the time. I wish I could outgrow that as easily as I do clothes. Lol

I also have to remember that I control so much more of my life than I give myself credit for, or allow myself . . .to. It’s easy to lose sight of that when you live in an area where everyone else gives credit to someone else’s will, or fate, or whatever.

It’s not set in stone, until after it passes.

I am pretty stoked about going to see my oldest son tomorrow. He is in a faith based recovery program way down southern Missouri. He’s like 2 months in, and he’s never stayed somewhere before more than a few detox days. It’s a milestone moment for him, and probably the same for me. No pressure though. I just want him to stay ok. It’s not a big ask. It only feels like it is. Lol no lol

Got another son moving out soon. A little sad, or disappointed, or both that he has to move out. It's not how I wanted it, but it's not solely in my control, his . . . behavior has a hand on the steering wheel as well. The learning has to take, or what's the point.

Love is love through it all though. Boundaries and conditions are for all parties to benefit from, even if some won't see, or feel them for a time.

The rest of my kids, are experiencing adult life the best ways they know, but seem like they got it down well enough I can be proud from here.

I love them all.

All the time.

Regardless of their circumstances, frustrations, and visitations. lol

Now, be kind, remain grateful and, and. . .

I was gonna say, stay humble, but, although humility is beneficial, and how! I do believe that to succeed one has to believe in oneself. Pride is too important to pass on.

It's like 60/40 pride/humility, maybe even 65/35.

Pride in myself, and what I do, without being conceded and cocky is instrumental in assuring success.

Plus, the pride I'm talking about comes from the learning from our mistakes and owning our shit. Isn't that what humility is?

Recognize, be kind, and remain grateful. Staying cool is optional. Lol

Until next week;

"Every one of us are a product of all the things we've experienced, seen, read, and heard in our lives. So when I write, I'm remembering things that happened. Those things become part of the story". - Stan Lee

[mossflwer]

End of year streaming retrospective

Howdy folks! I wanted to take some time to process this past year's creative efforts, review my past goals, and set new ones for 2023!

I seriously can't thank each and every one of you enough for making this year such a blast. The only reason I'm still streaming is because of the awesome community, and I look forward to serving ya'll to the best of my ability this next year!

I initially started writing a huge break down of the past two years, all the things I've tried streaming, my different processes, blah blah blah. You probably don't want to read several thousand words of me stroking my own creative ego so instead I've tied to boil it down to some bullet points to share things that helped me but its still way too fucking long lmao.

What I'm grateful for

Before I launch into congratulating myself, I want to thank everyone who made this fucking possible.

YOU! Everyone who shows up to stream, interacts with any of my content, and just in general has been supportive! The only reason I'm still streaming is because of folks like you.

Encouragement from other streamers/creatives. I'd list folks here but its too long and I don't want to leave folks out. But I've legit never had other creative folks encourage me like some of ya'll have.

The awesome communities in which I've been able to make new friends and collab with some awesome folks, its genuinely made my year.

Previous Goals for 2022

Contribute positively to the Twitch / gaming community: I feel like this was the most successful its ever been. Hearing that the streams can be a safe space for folks means the world to me and I want to keep building on that.

Grow as a creative, with speaking and production: I feel way more confident in speaking now but there's still lots of room to grow! And especially with the tiktoks I've loved doing more video editing.

Keep a consistent creative practice: I'm so thankful for chat keeping me accountable to this. Knowing folks expect me live at X times has kept me motivated and I'm so grateful for that.

One collab a week: This went well! The intention was to highlight other cool creators and contribute what I could to their channels. Probably gonna update this to 1 collab every 2 weeks for less stress.

One tiktok a week: This worked great! It hasn't helped build my twitch audience much but it is growing steadily. Updating to 3 tiktoks a week since that pace seems to work for me.

One new redeem a week: Didn't work out as great, but still pushed me to keep iterating my channel/overlay and avoid stagnating.

What I learned

My ideal stream length is 3-4 hours. I only stream as a hobby, since I have a 9-5 job that takes most of my time and pays all of my bills already. This length seems like enough time to hangout and still have time for everything else.

Modding for other people can be a cool way to contribute to the community. I'm still pretty uncomfortable with the idea of people modding for me and doing free labor, but the sorta "we got each others backs" modding that I've seen friends do for each other has been really fun to participate in.

Setting a community vibe can be tough but is extremely important: Initially I set out for my chat to be a safe space to chat about tough topics, since I really value deep/hard convos. I think for now though, I’ve realized that stream is not always the place for these conversations which is really hard for me. I want to listen and support people who are being vulnerable. But I also need to look out for the rest of the chat and community who are just looking to vibe. Wish I had a better way to tackle it and give people support while still keeping a comfy vibe on stream.

Social media is important for growth: Twitter has been fun to just dick around with and connect with existing audience/peers. Tiktok seems great for growth but can be fickle. YT Shorts is similar, with the added furry hate comments that don't bother me too much. And I've been having a blast with Tumblr, but I might make an alt just to shitpost because I've noticed I do more shitposting than actual content shit.

Try new shit!: I've been experimenting with a private stream that you can only get to through my site, which I've used for low-key vinyl streams. I really want to do more weird shit over there, but the important thing is don't be afraid to try new stuff!

Watch other streams: If you want to contribute in a medium, you need to know what other folks are doing. Take notes, be inspired, but don't copy. And support your homies efforts too!

Consistency over Quality: People like consistency, especially in streaming. Someone knowing “oh its tuesday, that means moss is live tonight!�� is fantastic for recurring viewership. And posting one 7/10 tiktok every week is way better than one 10/10 tiktok every few months. See MissJackieCR's Youtube video on content creation AMA for more.

Don't chase perfection: Its cliche as hell, but if you try and get everything you make perfect, you'll never finish anything. With streams, always strive to make your next one 1% better than the last one. With other content, I try to get stuff to around 80% of whatever my quality bar is. There are diminishing returns to polishing shit up, and your time may be better spent just publishing it then starting something new.

Goals for 2023

Explore different sorts of content! Stuff on the games industry, spirituality, and collaborative creation all are on my radar.

More game design stuff! I want to ramp up what I'm able to share with ya'll when it comes to how games are designed and made.

More collabs! I just love hanging with folks on stream and its fun.

Actually post to instagram, since its been working for some others.

Watch my own fucking vods. I know its the best way to see how you can improve your own content, I just need a better routine for it.

More side streams! Stuff on Tumblr Live and the private stream.

Try and make some Youtube content!

Experiment with live bass playing streams, or something to incorporate music into stream even more.

For real, thank you so much for the support, its meant the world to me. For everyone who'se come along for the ride, thank you so much. This might just be a side-project for me but its genuinely a highlight of my week and I'm looking forward to doing even more in 2023!

[elf-ring-system]

Pt1 Pt2 Pt3

Kokichi,

Thank you for the life-changing observation that there is a brick wall in the innerworld /s /t. I miss you, bro. At least you were right about co-hosting for that month or so. As annoyed as I get sometimes, I really am grateful for all you did during that month or two. I don't think anybody's ever been that vocally against my sister until you, and I think I would have gone insane if you hadn't helped out

Me,

Way to only get cancelled one and a half times this year

Kiyo,

Fuck you, your letter to yourself sucked. This is a very corny idea. Spinner said ironic and bulliable you cheesy motherfucker /t. I'm proud of you for still being yourself after what happened early this year. Plenty of us have just stopped fronting and enjoying hobbies and talking after things like that, and those weren't even tied to such personal things as yours was. You've been a reliable host even when it most definitely wasn't your job, and nobody so far has been as understanding of everybody and considerate of people who don't front as much as you have. I'm sorry I stuck you in this role, but I'm glad I did. No matter what anybody says, you deserve the good things going on with you. You deserve to enjoy yourself, you deserve to do things without constantly feeling guilty, you deserve to have someone like Mizuki, and you deserve to be yourself as much as any of us. And you'd better post this, or I'll frontlock you for a month again /hj

-Fukase

((There is no need to threaten me, but thank you <3

Korekiyo 🥀,

I'm sorry for the few times I've been short with you. You're doing as well as you can, and I appreciate your willingness to work with me and the others

Kotoko,

Thanks for being tough this year. You're very brave considering everything you've already had to go through

Kurogiri,

I hope you let it sink in that I rated you above my fiance. You're doing an amazing job. Nobody could expect that much from you, and you do it all day every day anyway. Don't beat yourself up so much. You can't help anything that happened in your source, you don't have to make up for anything that happened there. Fuck everyone else. It's their issue to work through. And the things that happened this year weren't your fault either. You didn't really have any options. Please do something nice for yourself

Licorice,

Thanks for stepping in for a bit. December was stressful. You seem really cool, I hope you stick around

Light,

Technically, you're tied with Stain. Yours is funnier though. Thanks for working us through accepting our NPD

Loki,

Congrats on being so obnoxiously loud that Spinner assumed you were a mental illness /t. As far as I can remember though, you were the first one to give a solid answer that wasn't a vague thought or a random note, so genuinely thank you for rushing the process. Even if it was only because you were pissed we were praying in a christian church. Understandable to be honest

Mafuyu,

I'm so sorry we were not prepared. At all. When you split. Most people understand the system thing off the bat, I swear. Thanks for being a voice of reason

[helloalycia]

a bitch [one] // leigh shaw

summary: you're used to leigh's constant mood swings and unpredictability, but didn't expect she'd ever do something to hurt you like she did.

warning/s: cheating

author's note: an angsty leigh shaw imagine was requested, so here we are! there's one more part to this so enjoy 😊

part two | masterlist | wattpad

Leigh Shaw could be a very unpredictable woman.

Ever since the unfortunate death of her husband, Matt, she'd become very erratic. It was hard to remember what she was like before he died, but then she'd flash me a smile and say something adorable and I remembered. Other times though, she could be as explosive as they came. If you ever got swept up in her mood swings, you'd be screwed.

Despite this, I remained by her side. That's what best friends did. Even when she yelled at me or gave me the cold shoulder or treated me like dirt, I stayed because I knew that was what she needed.

One time, a few months after Matt's death, I was stopping by to see how she was. A prime example of the cold effect she could have on people.

I raised my hand to knock, but the door suddenly swung open, revealing a peeved Jules and a pissed Leigh further behind her in the hallway.

"Hey," I greeted her sister with a smile, but she moved past me moodily. I glanced at Leigh before catching Jules' arm, stopping her. "What happened?"

Jules smiled bitterly. "You know, you should reconsider where you put your care, Y/N. Some people just aren't worth it."

At that last part, she glared over my shoulder, no doubt at Leigh. I turned to look at Leigh, who merely stuck a middle finger up at her sister before storming towards to the kitchen.

"What a bitch," Jules mumbled, making me wince because it was such a horrible word.

Jules shook me off before marching to her car to leave. I sighed and turned around to let myself in to their house. Closing the door behind me, I followed after Leigh and found her making toast in the kitchen angrily.

"Hey," I began softly, not wanting to give her another reason to get pissed off. Sitting on a stool at the island, I asked, "What happened?"

She forced a smile as she grabbed her toast from the toaster and dropped it on a plate. "My sister can't respect my space is all."

I pursed my lips awkwardly, watching as she grabbed butter from the fridge. Noticing my silence, she glanced up at me through her eyelashes.

"What?" she deadpanned, pausing from her actions.

"I don't think Jules is trying to upset you," I began, knowing I'd probably regret it. "I'm sure she understands you want space, but she loves you. And when you see someone you love hurting, you feel like you have to do something."

A sour smile broke out on her face as she scoffed. "Wow. Could you have your head stuck any further up Jules' arse?"

"Leigh, that's not what I'm–"

"What the hell are you even doing here?" she snapped. "I didn't invite you, Y/N."

Tensing my jaw, I refrained from getting annoyed. "Believe it or not, I actually wanted to check on you."

She curled her lips into a frown. "Well, I'm fine."

As if to prove that she was, she continued to butter her toast, but when she set her knife down, it slipped off the edge of the table and clattered to the floor. Frustrated, she slammed a fist on the countertop.

"It's okay, I'll–"

"Just get out," she cut me off when I was making a move to help her. I paused, wondering if she meant it, then her deadly green glare settled on my face. "Leave."

Sighing with defeat, I nodded and wordlessly left.

—

Sometimes Leigh wouldn't apologise. She'd act like nothing had happened and we'd move on. Other times, she actually would, surprisingly recognising that she'd done something wrong.

There was this one time when I'd invited her over for the evening to eat dinner and watch some films. The dinner went perfectly fine – we talked, we laughed, we spent time together – but then when we settled in the living room to watch a film, things started to unravel.

I can't remember exactly what she'd said. One second we were choosing a film on Netflix, then she was trying to make plans with me on the weekend. Unfortunately, I already had plans with my girlfriend, Alex, and Leigh didn't seem to like this. She'd made a comment under her breath and though I don't remember it specifically, I knew it wasn't polite.

Before I knew it, we were screaming at each other, arguing over the dumbest things. It started off being about my girlfriend and then the most unrelated stuff was being brought up on both of our ends. Sometimes she could be so aggravating, managing to rile me up and bring the worst out in me. The argument lasted a few minutes before she left, leaving me seething and full of hurt.

It was the following day at work when she came to see me next. I owned a café a few doors down from her mother's dance studio and was working a shift when her sister came through the front door.

I smiled at her when she approached the counter dressed in gym gear, her usual getup when at work with her family.

"Hey, how're you doing, Jules?" I asked.

"I'm good," she greeted with a smile, before it faded. "Just a warning, Y/N, Leigh is incoming in one minute. She wants to apologise."

Eyes rolling with mild annoyance, I let out a sigh. As dreadful as our spat was last night, I knew I had to also apologise to her. I'd said some hurtful things that made me feel all icky inside. Going to sleep after a fight was never a nice feeling.

"I don't know how you've put up with her for this long," Jules commented, picking up a cupcake from the display. "She can be so horrible to you."

I frowned, not feeling comfortable talking badly of Leigh behind her back. "That's not fair, Jules. You know what she's going through."

Jules gave me a knowing look. "I do, but that doesn't give her a free pass to treat you like she does."

Shrugging, I busied myself with cleaning up the crumbs from Jules' cupcake and giving her a plate.

"I take it you're going to forgive her then," she stated, though she definitely knew the answer judging from her expression.

"We both said some things we shouldn't have," I tried to explain so it didn't seem like I was giving in so easily, which deep down, I definitely knew I was, but Leigh was worth it.

Jules chuckled. "Yep, you're forgiving her. Looks like it's Leigh's lucky day."

I didn't say anything as she picked up the plate, ready to take a seat at one of the tables. Just as she was about to leave, she paused thoughtfully.

"You know, if you didn't have a girlfriend already, I'd say you were whipped," she said casually.

Ignoring her words, I watched her take her a seat on one of the spare tables. She made jokes like that a lot, but the truth was that I would probably do anything for Leigh. We'd been best friends since university – that was way too long to simply throw away our friendship because she was going through a tough time. And yes, the girlfriend talk threw me off at times... by the time I'd realised I liked Leigh as more than a friend, she was engaged. And I got over it, but Jules continued with the jokes and I continued to dismiss it.

As Jules warned, Leigh entered the café and caught my eyes with a nervous smile. I returned it, just as nervous as she looked, before watching her approach the counter. She was dressed in gym gear, like her sister, but a fine layer of sweat coated her skin which made me think she may have just finished teaching a class.

"Hey," she said with a rare gentleness to her voice. Her hands rested on the counter, fumbling slightly, before she put them by her sides instead. "How are you?"

Uncomfortably, I played with a loose thread on my apron. "I've been better, not gonna lie."

She exhaled regretfully. "I want to apologise, Y/N. Last night... it wasn't fair what I did. Just snapping at you like that."

I didn't know what to say, so I stayed quiet and avoided her eyes.

"I just get so angry sometimes," she admitted, noticing I wouldn't speak. She sounded exhausted and I looked up to see her running a hand through her hair. "I can't explain it. My anger at you wasn't about Alex or the plans, it was just me."

"It's because you're still hurting," I told her what I'd observed, shoulders relaxing. "And you're not very good at expressing that."

She shook her head, eyes drifting to the till distractedly. "I should be because I keep hurting the people I love."

My heart ached at the devastation in her voice and I put my hand out, motioning for her to take it. Thankfully, she did and I squeezed hers gently.

"Look, let's just forget it happened," I said with a small smile. "I... I didn't exactly say the nicest of things either."

She grimaced, letting go of my hand. "No, I get why you said it. It wasn't fair of me to just start on you like that. You were just defending your girlfriend... God, I can be such a bitch sometimes."

I winced at the word, it grating my ears. "That's not true, Leigh."

"It is." She nodded slowly, rolling her eyes. "Everybody thinks it. Including you."

"I don't think that," I said with creased brows, meeting her saddened eyes. "You're not a bitch. I've never once thought that."

"Really?" She raised a brow, smiling with defeat. "Not even that time when I stole your doughnuts after that fight we had two weeks ago?"

I shook my head. "Nope."

"Not even when I snapped at you for no reason the other day when you tried to help me write my article?"

"Not even then."

Her expression softened with guilt. "Not even when I called you a selfish jerk last night for not wanting to spend time with me even though you have a life of your own?"

I rounded the counter and stopped before her, looking between her guilt-ridden eyes. "Especially not then, Leigh."

She breathed out quietly and I pulled her in for a hug, glad when I felt her relax beneath me. Her arms clasped around my waist and I was glad we were good again.

—

It was a year later when Leigh and I eventually got together as a couple. It was a long time after I broke up with my girlfriend and it was completely unexpected.

I'd invited Leigh to be my 'date' to my mum's birthday party, since the two had gotten on so well in the past. She was happy to oblige, but as soon as we arrived, her mood changed.

I was helping collect the pizzas from the delivery guy when he started to flirt with me. At the time, I didn't even realise, but I knew that Leigh had acted different since it happened. When I finally confronted her about her sudden mood swing, she proceeded to make out with me completely unexpectedly and then admitted she was in love with me.

I'm not gonna lie, it was a good time. Since breaking up with my girlfriend, I'd been single and falling for my best friend all over again. Leigh making the first move was all I'd needed to finally share how I felt, too.

That was six months ago, and since then, we'd been going strong. Of course, there were still times when she had her mood swings and took it out on me (and literally everyone else) without realising, but it wasn't anything I couldn't handle. I was used to it, used to her. So much that I should have trusted her even when presented with conflicting evidence.

We were at her workplace, Basically News, where she wrote columns part-time. It was a work party she'd been invited to and she'd asked me to be her date, which of course I said yes to. At the moment, we may or may not have been a little tipsy as we stood in the corner, drinking from flutes of champagne.

"Thank you again for coming here tonight as my date," Leigh said with a grin, arms laced around my neck as she held me close.

Pressing a kiss to my lips briefly, she pulled away and left my head spinning, and not just because of the alcohol.

"Any excuse to not be on the closing shift at work is good enough for me," I said playfully, resting my hands behind her waist.

She gasped. "Oh? So it wasn't me who persuaded you to come tonight?"

I pulled a face, feigning forgetfulness. "Hmm, I'm not too sure. Maybe you'll have to remind me why I agreed to come."

She bit her lip to contain her grin, eyes flickering to my lips. Leaning in, her lips met mine and I closed my eyes, enjoying the way she combed her hand through my hair and tilted my head towards her so she could get better access. She was a really good kisser and she knew the effect she had on me as I felt her smirk into it, catching her breath, before chasing down my lips and nibbling on them temptingly.

Remembering where we were, I gently pushed her back and tried to contain my smile. "Make it PG, Leigh. You're at work."

She licked her lips and began to laugh, green eyes darting between mine. "You're just so cute."

I rolled my eyes playfully. "I don't want everyone here knowing how irresistible you are or they might try to steal you away."

Her laughter filled the air, making my stomach flip at the sound.

"Though I think they may already know that because of how sexy you look tonight," I added, eyes fluttering down her body to appreciate just how well she pulled off her fitted black dress.

She raised her brows with surprise, making me mirror her expression comically.

Leaning close to my ear, she said above a whisper, "D'you wanna know something not-so-sexy?"

Her breath tickled my ear and sent shivers down my spine, making me tense up slightly. Judging from the expression on her face, she was very much aware of what she was doing to me.

"What?" I asked with amusement.

"I really need to pee," she said, and I began to laugh because she did, too, and I knew she wasn't kidding. Pressing a kiss to my cheek, she added, "I'll be right back."

Letting go of me, she waved goodbye before going to the toilets. I busied myself with getting to know her colleagues whilst I waited, until five minutes had passed and I realised she still hadn't returned. Deciding to check on her, I headed in the direction of the toilets, only to freeze when I saw something I definitely wasn't expecting.

Leigh was kissing another girl outside of them.

It was her colleague, Abby, that was the first thing I noticed. But I didn't stay to make out anything more as I immediately turned around and walked away, trying to make my brain catch up to what I'd just seen.

Leigh was kissing somebody else. Somebody that wasn't me. Somebody who I had always suspected had a thing for her, but I never considered that maybe Leigh had a thing for her, too.

Definitely not tipsy anymore, I found the nearest table and took a seat, trying not to assume the worst. But how else could I perceive what I'd just seen? It could have been a mistake, though I was so shocked and hurt and angry that I couldn't imagine how. Maybe she'd explain herself to me. Or maybe she'd tell me what actually happened. Maybe.

Leigh returned not long after, finding me at the table. Smiling like nothing had happened, she pulled me up and led me to dance. Not once, for the remainder of the evening, did she suggest that anything was out of the ordinary, nor did she explain herself. And I couldn't help but wonder how I had the worst luck with women.

This one hurt way more than the last time because it wasn't just anyone – it was Leigh.

—

A year and a half ago:

"Danny mentioned the breakdown you had last week because they didn't have doughnuts, so I, er, brought you these just in case."

Leigh cracked a small smile in the passenger's seat before accepting the box I held out to her. I'd just parked up outside the place where she went to her grief counselling group, having offered to drop her off. It had only been a few months since Matt died, but sometimes, the old Leigh shone back through and it made me feel hopeful that she'd make it through this.

"Thank you," she said genuinely, fingers wavering on top of the box, before she lifted her gaze to meet mine. "And thanks for the ride. You didn't have to."

I shrugged, thumb tapping the steering wheel mindlessly. "I don't mind. I just wanna make sure you get here okay."

She sighed, shaking her head, though a ghost of a smile was on her lips.

"Text me when you're done and I'll be happy to pick you up, too," I added casually.

"Thanks," she repeated, though didn't make a move to leave my car just yet. I didn't rush her.

Sadly, the silence was broken when my phone began to ring and my girlfriend's name flashed on the screen in my car where my phone was connected to. Glancing at Leigh, I just about made out the eye-roll she did.

"Sorry," I apologised, before declining the call instantly.

"Why d'you do that? Could've been urgent," she said with a clipped tone.

Oh, no, I thought. Whenever she used that tone, it meant she was picking a fight.

"I'm here with you," I said like it was obvious, hoping that one thing didn't ruin the moment.

She tensed her jaw, looking down as her hair fell around her face. "Whatever."

Before I could think of a way to make her feel better, the screen lit up again and my ringtone echoed through the car. I winced at the glare Leigh sent to the screen. If looks could kill, my car would be toast.

Declining the call, I looked to her worriedly. "What's wrong, Leigh?"

Her glare fell to me. "Why the hell do you keep declining it? She's calling you for a reason."

I raised my eyebrows. "Because I'm here with you? Alex can wait. I'm taking you to grief group."

"Well, I'm here at grief group," she mocked, turning to face me with an unexplainable frustration.

I didn't understand why she was so touchy all of a sudden. The car ride here, she'd been fine. Just a moment ago, she'd been fine. But now... now she was acting unreasonable.

My phone buzzed in my pocket suddenly, followed by a tone that signalled I had a text. Leigh smiled bitterly, rolling her eyes.

"Let me guess," she muttered. "It's her."

Still very much unable to keep up with her mood swings, I didn't answer. Her gaze snapped to mine as she stared at me with disbelief.

"Why the fuck aren't you checking it?!"

I grimaced, my own exasperation slipping out when I blurted, "I'm a little confused to what you want from me right now, Leigh!" Breathing out slowly, I said, "I'm sorry if this is bothering you. I'll turn off my phone next time."

As if I'd deeply offended her, she raised a brow incredulously. "Are you kidding me? Why would this bother me?"

Okay, I was extremely confused now.

"I don't know," I admitted, bewildered.

"Is that what you think of me? Some clingy bitch who won't let you live your life?"

I widened my eyes. "What?! Leigh! I never said–"

"Sorry if taking me is such a task," she said abruptly, moving to put the box of doughnuts on the dashboard.

"I never said that," I told her sternly.

"You didn't have to. I know already. I'm just a burden on everyone."

She got out of the car and slammed the door shut behind her. Meanwhile, my confusion was still trying to make out what the hell just happened.

"Don't bother picking me up," she said through the open window of the passenger's door. A scowl was on her face as she added, "You should go spend time with Alex. She's probably missing you."

Breathing out, I leaned back into my seat and watched her walk away and to the entrance of the building. When she acted like this – so push and pull with her emotions – I was so conflicted. What could possibly be going on in her mind that she managed to flip everything that just happened? A complete 180?

Knowing she'd just need some time to cool off, I shook my head and focused on leaving. But then I remembered my phone went off and pulled it out to see what was so important. Aside from two missed calls from Alex, I saw I had a voicemail, too, not a text.

Grumbling fo myself, still disgruntled by Leigh's attitude, I raised the phone to my ear to have a listen, whilst hoping it wasn't actually anything life-threatening.

At first, all I could hear was some very faint laughing and vague noises, kind of like material rubbing together and breathing. I assumed Alex had left me a voicemail without even realising since I'd done that countless of times to other people, having dropped my phone in my bag without realising it was still on. But then the noises became more distinct and I made out words.

"Jake, stop messing about," a voice said, whom I instantly recognised as my girlfriend.

I furrowed my brows. Jake? Jake as in the guy she worked with Jake?

"If you stop teasing me then maybe I will," a gravelly yet devious voice responded.

My throat went dry when I heard more laughter before it went quiet. It didn't take a genius to understand what was happening, especially when the moans that followed echoed in my ear, begging me not to forget.

Unable to listen anymore, I hung up and threw my phone onto the passenger's seat. Tears welled in my eyes as I glanced over at it hesitantly, almost wishing it hadn't even existed. And as much as I didn't want to accept the glaring fact, it hit me like a ton of bricks.

She was cheating on me.

[so10]

warning: depression

things has always been difficult, there was this time where you got a little better at least you were a functioning human being now however you're back in that dark place again hitting rock bottom

this time though, you aren't fighting this alone

you've got ten by your side .

"hey love" he said entering your very messy room, with you laying on your bed just like how he left you two days ago

you promised him you'd take a shower and change and heat some food he cooked for you to eat, but that's the reason you hate promises, you knew damn well it was out of your hand but it was the only way to make him leave for work and his own life.

he knew it would happen again, but didn't comment on it or give any reaction not wanting to make you feel bad

you couldn't even reply back, you were so tired and in your head, you thought 'well I better save that energy for breathing or something' so you gave him a tired smile instead

"I bet you haven't eaten today, what about we eat together? i got your favourite on my way"

his voice full of energy and worry he couldn't hide this time, you loved this man so much it hurts your heart, you don't wanna drag him into this but this little shithead won't let you go.. so kind and sweet

ten pulled you to sit up straight and got a tray so you two can eat on your bed, knowing how hard of a task eating alone is for you. the last thing he wanted was to overwhelm you.

he kissed your forehead before holding a spoon in front of your mouth "here babe! it's specially delicious today!"

he would always help you with the first bites, cause starting is the hardest part

you opened you mouth and took a bite, he was right it was delicious, then took the spoon from his hand to feed yourself, although your eyes were on the food because you're embarrassed in general you felt him smiling

half way through it you stopped eating, tears rolling down your face.. you put your head in your hands

"hey it's okay, we can take a break to watch something" he patted your hair

'we' .. he always had such a way with words, so caring and careful, knows how to pick them just right to make you feel the most comfortable, to let you know you're not alone in this

"ten I'm so sorry"

he didn't respond, giving you time and space to let it all out

"I'm dragging you in my messy depressing life, you deserve so much better.. you've been nothing but supportive of me but I'm afraid I can't do this anymore, I swear I try my best for you I promise I do .. but it seems like my best is never enough, what if it takes years? this is so unfair for you. I love you so much and I'm beyond grateful but I'm asking you again to just.. break up with me" you said between sobs, it wasn't easy for you either, in fact it was harder

"y/n, babe, I'm your bestfriend before I am your boyfriend, so I'll be here regardless! I'm well aware you're doing your best and let me tell you this again, IT IS enough you Are enough, it's not your fault you're going through a tough time angel.. I wanna be by your side more than anything else, good days or bad days, just like I know you'll do if it was me, I love meeting you here every other day, I enjoy having meals with you, watching shows and movies together, taking showers together, cleaning the apartment with you. I love and enjoy every moment of it"

there was a pause, then his mischievous smile appears

"and you know what's the best part? having s-" you pushed his chest chuckling and wiping your tears "shut up "

"but really, there's some hard days for you and me, both of us, but that's life baby and I will go through them with or without you in my life.. but I choose to have them with you because I want to, don't worry about me cause believe me if I didn't want this I would've left long time ago.. but please give me another chance let me stay, let's try one more time okay? one more time y/n"

you knew he wasn't talking about your relationship but something else, you pushed the food aside and hugged him so hard "thank you ten.. we'll give it one more try"

"... now if you're not gonna eat let's go take a shower because your hair stinks"

"wow..fuck you".

(requests are open :))

[yourmidnightlover]

rock

Summary - spencer wants to figure out what's wrong with you, only to be reminded what day it is and he remembers why you've been so distant.

TW: talk abt: rape, recovery, therapy, case stuff; mention of: drug addiction, rape, miscarriage, being shot, death lol

WC - 4,283

!DISCLAIMER! - i am in no way trying to romanticize recovery from a traumatic event or being upset/depressed/anxious. this is kinda my way of getting through my own issues, so please don't think that's what i'm trying to do in any way. i also don’t know how i feel abt this ending since i wrote it so long ago but oh well!

i just realized there are a few spoilers so i'll put *asterisks* around them. those parts are just explaining how the reader's always there for the team.

----------------------------------

you had always been the rock in spencer's life.

mentally, at least.

when he had nobody there for him when he was going through his addiction with dilaudid, there you were. you helped him through it when everybody else on the team acted as if they never noticed.

you were the one that encouraged him to get help, and pushed him to follow through. you made sure he ate and talked to someone when he had his urges again, even if it wasn't you.

you let him come over and cry about what had happened, and how unfair his life was. you consoled him and would tell him how nothing was his fault. how he didn't deserve anything bad in his life.

*and when emily 'died', he went to your house every day. you held him as he felt himself falling apart from losing her. you didn't even worry about yourself needing to be consoled, because spencer needed you to be there for him.

*when she came back you were the one to convince him to forgive her. you talked sense into him. you reminded him how much he pleaded to have her back, and then he did. so he managed to forgive her... because of you and your logic.

*and you weren't just there for spencer. while, yes, you made a special effort to be there for him, you were there for everyone on the team.

*when derek was arrested back in chicago and the team found out about his past, you were the one he leaned on for comfort. you and penelope. you let him cry on your shoulder and yell at you about how twisted a man would have to be to do something so cruel to a child.

*when jj was kidnapped and beaten to a miscarriage, you were the first she told. you didn't say anything. you knew there was nothing you could say that would relinquish the pain of losing a child. so you let her cry. you let her hug you for what felt like hours. you let her grief her unborn baby for as long as she needed.

*when penelope was shot, nobody cared to check up on her after the fact except you. you went to her apartment for weeks just to make sure she was okay. eventually, she was able to let loose all of her frustrations on you, and you took it like a champ. she ranted about how she just wanted to be loved by someone attractive and how unfair and cruel the world is, in spite of how much good she tries to bring into it.

*when hotch lost hailey, you took care of his files. you offered to watch henry and let hotch cry to you about losing her a few times once you broke past his tough exterior. you even cried with him and jack. you made them dinner whenever you could, and helped him look for good nannies to help care for jack.

*when rossi lost carolyn, you went to her grave with him on many occasions. you brought him his favorite scotch, which was very pricey, and his favorite cigars, also very pricey, and tried your best to recreate 'the rossi special' upon his directions. it helped him feel in control of something when he needed it.

*and when emily came back from the dead, you helped walk her through her own grief. she lost herself, and buried her emotions. you helped her dig up her old self, and grow into an even better woman. you even took care of her cat when penelope couldn't manage. you helped emily grieve her own death when she wanted to deny it ever happened, and she was forever grateful for you.*

you had become like the team's built-in therapist when something bad happened, and you loved it that way. you loved being the one the team went to when they needed it. it made you feel as though you had a purpose, which was something you desperately needed.

but when you went through your own trauma almost a year ago, you refused help from anyone. you knew you should've asked someone for help, or at least someone to cry or talk to when you needed to.

the team had been working on a case for longer than expected, 8 days now, and everyone was really frustrated. you had released the profile 7 days ago, and there was still no new information. it was as if the unsub had gone dormant, and you all couldn't bear that thought.

when the team released earlier than normal from the precinct and you all went to the hotel you had been staying at, you decided to get a drink from the bar quickly. you went alone, wanting to review a few of the case files during the process and not needing a distraction.

you ordered a jack and coke, and opened the case files to begin rereading them, seeing if you had missed anything.

victims were kept for 24 hours, filmed, raped, restrained, cut in pieces, and thrown in the trash like garbage. it was absolutely disgusting, and the worst you had seen in a while. the victims were low-risk and most of them had a place of authority.

the unsub had been profiled to be someone who was bossed around by a woman, narcissistic and egotistical, wanted to feel more power and authority.

the problem is, that profile was most people living in the area. even penelope couldn't dwindle down the suspects.

and alas, you had missed nothing. nothing new appeared or caught your eye. you gulped down the rest of your drink and paid for it before packing up your things to head upstairs. you tossed the file back into your bag and began the trek to the elevator.

you were interrupted by something hitting the top of your head, rendering you unconscious.

the team had woken up, and after waiting around for half an hour, spencer realized something was wrong. he had morgan bust into your room, only to find the bed unslept in. you were missing. and the worst part... you fit the unsubs type.

spencer felt his heart drop at the realization he had taken you. and it seemed as though there was no trail as to where you had gone. penelope checked the cameras, only to find that they were hacked right after you left the bar, and then they resumed after you were taken.

at least they had a time frame.

later that day, after everyone hasting to figure something, anything out, spencer had gotten an email. he opened it and expected it to be relentless spam, only to realize it was a live feed video. a video of you. he instantly called penelope in hopes that she could trace it.

she said she could, but it would take some time because the amount of routers it had been going through.

while they were waiting, you noticed you were alone. you knew who the unsub was too, thanks to his baffling stupidity and narcissism that lead him to believe he wouldn't get caught.

"officer johnson! it's officer johnson!" you looked around the camera for a second, noticing something moving. "he-he here," you cried out. "i love you," you said to the camera to nobody in particular, but someone in mind.

you were terrified. spencer could see it in your eyes. he could see the tears you tried not to shed. you didn't want to please him, but you couldn't help but feel the absolute horror and fear coursing through your body at a relentless pace.

"hi there, missus fbi," he teased, finally walking into the frame with a ski mask over his face, clearly not aware that we knew his identity.

spencer told garcia who he was, and she began her digging. officer johnson's great grandparents had owned a farm that was since then refurbished. it was an hour away.

officer johnson had known that you two had chemistry. that's why he sent the email to spencer. he saw the longing glares, the 'innocent' touches, the smiles you would give each other, the longing looks you shared. he wanted to torment him.

so when he began undressing you and you turned your face away from the camera in hopes of sparing some of your own dignity, spencer felt his heart breaking for you. it broke even more when he heard the yelps, and screams, and please, and "no!'s" you elicited during the act.

they caught him before he cut you, but not before he finished the first part of his plan. your skirt was ripped, and your shirt was practically in two pieces. spencer had given you his jacket to cover yourself as much as you could.

you stayed silent the ride back. you didn't even let spencer hold you like you normally would after a tough case. you were ashamed. embarrassed. you felt worthless. you felt pathetic. you felt stupid. you felt helpless. you felt like you were drowning. you felt like you were without a life raft.

you knew you could talk to the team about it, but you felt so disgusted by the thought of what happened to you that you only talked about it in your therapy sessions.

hotch had given you two months off. he wanted you to grieve, and go to therapy, and try to cope with everything that had happened.

and you did try to do that. you tried your hardest to get over it and move past it, but nothing helped. not the journaling. not the talking. not the crying. nothing was working.

spencer gave you a little space at first, but he then decided to try to help you as you had helped him. he went over to your house almost every day, and sat outside your door after you wouldn't let him in.

you knew he was there... you sat on the other side.

"i-i know that you probably don't want to see anyone right now. and i'm uh, i'm sure you feel alone right now, or like you can't talk to anyone," spencer sniffled. "but pl-please just uhm, just know that i'm here when you want to talk about it. i'm here to listen to you when you need me to. i-i don't want you to be alone during this time, y/n. please, just let me in," he begged.

that was normally what he would say almost every night he went to your house. he would sit outside for hours after he would ask you to let him in without fail. until one day you let him in.

spencer felt so much relief when you opened the door, only for it to be smashed when he noticed your eyes looked red and puffy, your cheeks were stained with the tears you had been crying for so long. your cheeks were sunken in, and there were dark circles underneath your eyes that were once full of life and happiness. your eyes no longer had that gorgeous sparkle in them.

spencer vowed he would get them back.

as much as spencer wanted to wrap his arms around you in that moment, to comfort you and tell you that he was there, he wanted you to make the first move. he wanted to tell you how strong you were and how proud of you he was for getting through that. he wanted to tell you how much he loved you.

he wanted you to make the first touch, because he didn't want to further upset you. he didn't want to trigger a repressed memory, or bring back the feelings of what had happened.

but spencer's touch was nothing like the officer's. spencer's touch was soft and gentle. spencer's touch was feather-light and endearing. spencer's touch was love and home. the officer's was brittle, and rough, and repulsive.

"hug me?" you sniffled as your eyes welled with tears again as they had been for the past three weeks.

"of course," spencer slowly wrapped his arms around your shoulders as yours found his torso.

he walked inside with you still in his arms and slowly shut the door. without breaking from the hug, you both walked to the couch and sat down.

you didn't say anything. you just needed spencer to keep hugging you, so he did. he did whatever you wanted, needed, from him. eventually, you fell asleep in his embrace on the couch.

when spencer looked down at you, now sleeping against his chest, he couldn't bring his heart to remove himself from you. so like any whipped man would do, he carefully picked you up bridal styled and carried you to your room. he took his shoes off as well as his sweater vest before cuddling back up next to you.

as if it was a reflex, you cuddled up into his chest when he neared you again and got underneath the covers. spencer slept the best he did in months with you. and you slept without officer johnson in your dreams for the first time since that day.

ever since then, spencer had been making sure you were eating and drinking. he took you to your therapy sessions and stayed over most nights you had asked and he was able to.

they had a few cases during the two months, so every moment he could, spencer was with you. he coaxed you back to your normal-ish self. he watched as that glimmer in your eye began to slowly grow brighter everyday. he watched as your smile came back, and your tears didn't come so frequently.

the first time he had heard you laugh again, spencer had thought he was dreaming. he wished he had recorded that moment. he was more grateful than he's ever been in his life that he had an eidetic memory, because that sound would forever be engraved in his brain.

when you returned to work, you clung to spencer. he had become your tether to reality, and hope. he had become your rock during the recovery.

over the months, everyone slowly began to forget what had even happened. things went on as usual, and the team forgot the traumatic experience you had gone through. even spencer might've let the experience get lost in his brain.

so when it became 11 months and 3 weeks since the abduction, you began to distance yourself once again.

you politely declined going out with the team a couple days before the anniversary, something you never did. you insisted that you were just especially worn out from the case you had just been on.

spencer had to finish files given to him by derek anyway, so he didn't get to witness the encounter.

once the day of the anniversary came upon you, you found yourself feeling sick to your stomach. you couldn't help the tears that would fall from your face every so often. you knew why you felt this way, but you wanted to push past it.

you had gone into the office wearing a pantsuit and blazer, wanting to avoid the normal office skirt you happened to be wearing the day it happened. you stayed at your desk and quietly did your case files. you didn't even greet spencer as you would every day. you gave him a kind smile, but you would normally give him a hug, or at the very least an eager wave upon his arrival.

spencer just assumed it was one of those days where you just woke up on the wrong side of the bed. it wasn't spencer's fault he thought this. he didn't even look at his calendar to check what day it was. he just knew they had paperwork.

but he did have this day marked in his calendar. he had it marked so he would remember to be extra kind to you, and do your files for you, and come to your place with your favorite wine and takeout. he wanted to help you through the one year anniversary, but he forgot to check his stupid calendar.

you thought he didn't care. you thought the man who you loved, and the man who helped you through everything that had happened had had enough of your complaining and grievances. so, you didn't tell him about it. you didn't bother him with the terrible thoughts clouding your mind because you thought it'd burden him.

so when you finished all of your case files early, you asked hotch if you could leave early, at 2:00, because you had things to tend to. he allowed you to do so, but this rose a flag for spencer.

he saw you exit without saying goodbye to him, something you hadn't done the entirety of knowing him. you had always told everyone to have a nice night and to be safe before leaving, but not today.

finally, he looked at his phone for the first time all day, only to feel like the worst person in the world to realize what day it was. spencer felt absolutely horrible at this revelation and ran into hotch's office as quick as he could after packing his things.

"hotch!" he exclaimed upon opening his office door.

"go. she was practically in tears," hotch informed him. "and reid," spencer stopped in his tracks to turn and look at the stern man, "please make sure she's okay." spencer gave him a soft grin and a nod before turning around and bolting out of the office.

you had gotten home and immediately burst into tears. you shut the door with your back, and slid down it. you had never understood why people had done that in movies until now. you just couldn't wait to break any longer, so you settled for your front door.

you held back no wail, or scream as you cried in front of your door, your knees pulled up to your chest as you held them tightly.

you wondered why you had to go through that. you wanted to know what kind of karma there was for someone who had always tried to do the right thing to be hurt... and for nobody to even care. nobody wanted to console you, or to make sure you were alright.

you had checked up on everyone on every anniversary of their struggles. whether it be a death, abduction, anything, you had been there for every single anniversary or reminder. and nobody was there for you.

nobody was there for you to hug, or to lean on, or to cry to, or to scream at, or to rant to. nobody was there. nobody loved you enough to care about that.

but then you had to remind yourself that they all had lives.

but the person who is your life didn't even care.

spencer didn't care.

and that's why you truly lost it.

he acted like it was just another day. he acted like it wasn't the anniversary of the day you thought you were going to die. the day you wanted to die. the day you felt your most low, and humiliated. the day you lost all hope. and he didn't remember.

if the man with an eidetic memory didn't remember, it must be extremely insignificant. so therefore, you must be extremely insignificant.

spencer raced to your house. he wanted to be there for you today, and he failed. he felt like a failure as a friend. he hated himself for not being there for you when he knew you would need him. he knew how you clung to him in your time of need. you thought he was worthy enough to hold onto when you needed someone, and spencer felt elated at that.

but now he wasn't there for you. and you needed him.

he had quickly stopped by the store and your favorite takeout place to get the things you'd want. he got your wine, chocolate, food, flowers, and a teddy bear that had a sweater vest on him - you've always loved his sweater vests.

when he got to the steps of your house, he felt his heart drop. as he walked closer he heard the wails of your crying right by the door. he could sense the heartache from the edge of your porch, and felt himself feel even worse, which he didn't think was possible.

he instantly ran to the door and knocked profusely. you sniffled one last time, feeling embarrassed that someone had heard you crying your heart out. you had figured one of your neighbors heard you and wanted to tell you to keep it down, so you wiped your tears and the stray mascara from underneath your eyes and opened the door, keeping your eyes lowered in embarrassment.

"y/n," spencer announced sadly, a tear falling down his face. you looked up in confusion from hearing his voice. you noticed his tear and reached up to wipe it away on instinct.

"why're you crying? are you okay?" you asked, forgetting all of your own problems at the sight of spencer crying. spencer let out a small chuckle at your concern.

"i'm alright, aside from the fact that i'm a terrible friend," he admitted as his smile quickly faded upon seeing your stained cheeks. "i brought your favorites," he offered, holding the bag of goodies in one hand and the takeout in another.

"y-you... why?" you asked, wanting to make sure you weren't misreading the situation for him trying to comfort you.

"why?" he asked in disbelief. "because it's the anniversary. i can't tell you how sorry i am, y/n. i swear i marked it on my calendar and planned for us to take off so i could take care of you. i-i just woke up late and never bothered to even check my phone. i kn-know it's no excuse... but i am so, so, so sorry," he rambled out, already tearing up.

you grabbed his arm gently and pulled him inside before you started crying in front of your neighbors. you took the bags from his hands and placed them on your coffee table.

"i thought you just didn't care," you shrugged as you took a seat on the couch, prompting him to sit beside you.

"y/n..." he sighed as he realized how terrible he screwed up. "i will always care about this. i will always care about you. don't ever think differently. i'm just incredibly... dumb sometimes. i can't believe i made you think that," he trailed on. "i will never not care about you, y/n. i swear it. i will always, always care about you. i will always love you," he froze as he realized what he just revealed. your eyes widened, and squinted, and roamed his face, trying to figure out if he meant the words he had just sped out. "i truly do, y/n. i i’m in love with you and i'm so sorry i made it seem otherwise."

it took you a second to absorb everything that he had said.

"you too," you solemnly admitted. "i’m in love with you too. and i could forgive you... for almost forgetting," you gave him a small smile.

"i'm glad you could forgive me. i don't know what i'd do if you didn't," he relished. "you actually love me?" you nodded with a small smile.

"i have for a while," you turned your head to the bags on the table.

"oh! right!" he said, reaching for the gifts. "i got your favorite takeout, your favorite wine, your favorite chocolates, flowers, and..." he trailed on as he revealed each item. "i saw this teddy, and i couldn't resist," he smiled.

you took the bear, taking in its appearance. it had a light blue, navy, and white diamond pattern sweater vest and brown shoes on. it looked like spencer, just teddy bear form. you smiled widely at the sentiment.

"it's you," you grinned as you took it in your arms, hugging it tightly as you saw spencer nodded with a smile mirroring that of your own. "i love it," you chuckled.

"i would understand, the fur is really soft," he relished in the thought.

"i don't think he'd be as good of a cuddler as the real thing, though," you grimaced. "but he'll do for when i don't have you here i guess," you shrugged with a smile.

"i plan on being here as long as you'll let me," he said softly.

"always," you grinned, setting down the teddy bear and trading him for the real spencer reid.

"always," he repeated, taking you in his arms and squeezing you tightly as if you'd float away at any moment. "now let's dig into this food while you talk about your feelings, if you want that is," he said after releasing you from the hug.

"i think i want to," you nodded. "and spence?" he turned from getting the food out of the bag to look at you for a second. "thank you for being my rock through all of this."

"i'll always be your rock, y/n."

@averyhotchner  @greenprisca  @muffin-cup

[pathfinderslog]

Day #10

Tempest. Pathfinder's quarters. On the way to Eos.

🎶 Whatever it Takes - Imagine Dragons

As we can't use mass relays for the shifts between a system to another, like we'd have done in the Milky Way, in the Andromeda Galaxy we have to rely only on ours spaceships engines. Travel times are getting longer, but fortunately the Tempest is the fastest and most agile ship of the Initiative, so we are able to reach Habitat 1 in less than a week. We probably would have been able to get there sooner if Kallo hadn't had to make numerous evasive maneuvers to escape the Scourge's offshoots along the way.

In about 26 hours we will reach the Pytheas system and by then it shouldn't take long to reach the planet.

In these days I have had the opportunity to explore the ship from stern to bow and every corner has managed to enchant me. There is really everything you need to analyze and study all that Andromeda will offer us: flora, fauna, artifacts, new technologies! I even have a private cabin! (I've already said this, right?)

I also got to know the crew. If we need to work together for the good of us all we must do it well, as a team, and the best way to do this is to get to know each other.

First of all I need to know the on board crew: the pilot, the mechanic, the scientist, the doctor. They are essential support figures, without which it would not be possible to complete any mission. They keep the Tempest ready for the action and 100% efficient and take care of analyzing the samples we bring on board, they maintain active communications with the Nexus and they take care of coordinating the informations between my team and those of the leaders of the Initiative.

Gil tried to explain to me in the most elementary words possible how the engine works, which reproduces the ODSY of the arks on a smaller scale. Something related to the static energy accumulated while traveling and used to recharge the ship itself. I do not know. He tried hard, but I've never been good with technicalities. I prefer practice to theory.

Kallo, on the other hand, told me some curious anecdotes about his creation. He was part of the team in charge of designing and building the Tempest in the Milky Way and he left with her aboard the Nexus to follow her footsteps, while the rest of the group stayed behind. In a certain way it's like if he is a living legacy of the past. Couldn't have nothing better, after all, he was the testing pilot, he practiced with her a lot so he knows how she works.

The most curious thing, which both confirmed to me, is that the Tempest's cloacking system is based from the technical specifications of the Normandy SR-1's IES stealth system, but I know for sure that those projects are covered by military secrecy, so I don't understand how the Initiative could get their hands on them. Maybe my father has something to do with it? Maybe some of his old contacts in the N7? What else are you hiding from me, old man? AH! Damn! I wish I had you here now so I can choke you with my hands!

I still hold a grudge against my father for what he did to me.

Don't get me wrong, I am grateful to him for saving my life, but I also wish he hadn't burdened me with this HUGE responsibility. Fortunately, SAM has shown himself to be an excellent support several times, often also emotional, in certain ways, while not being able to show any emotion. Even if he's very sophisticated, he's still an AI, but sharing my father's body and mind for years has allowed him to share with me thoughts able to clarify many of my doubts about him and the relationship he had with us: me, Scott and even mum.

The more time passes, the more I feel I can do it!

This sense of oppression is gradually fading, and I must also thank the rest of my team for this.

Lexi now demands that I have a psychoanalysis session every day, arguing that it's essential to deal with mourn, and I, even if reluctantly, let her do it, because I am sure that my tangled mind is an interesting subject of study for her.

With Suvi we had some interesting scientific discussions, she showed me the results of the researches conducted so far by the Nexus and she passed me all the data of what we know so far about the Scourge. She is ... strange ... I thought I was strange, but she manages to be extremely intelligent and at the same time tremendously naive. She is convinced that behind the creation of the cosmos there is the hand of a god. Well, who am I to contradict her? Everyone is free to believe in what they want, as long as it doesn't interfere with their work.

Liam and Cora are helping me with the reports to send to the Nexus and together we analyze strategies and tactics to use to better prepare ourselves for what we have to face on Eos. Liam's experience with the Crisis Unit is proving particularly useful in this context of uncertainty, where anything that can go wrong surely will. And Cora, well, I understand why dad chose her as his second-in-command: she was part of a team of Asari Commando, Thessia's military and biotic combat excellence, backed by centuries of tactics and experience.

And then there is Vetra.

To have a smuggler's past she is very honest and crystal clear. I enjoy spending time with her. She is a tough girl who grew up alone, away from Palaven and the rest of the turian hierarchy (and I don't know how bad that can be), with a younger sister to raise, Sid. She told me what happened to the Nexus in the months before the arrival of the Hyperion: the clash with the Scourge, the chaos, the mutiny, the expulsion of the exiles, the failure of the first outposts. But she also told me amusing anecdotes, such as when she began retrieving special components for Kesh in the Milky Way - once, twice, three, four times - until she found out about the existence of the Andromeda Initiative and joined her in this undertaking, hoping for a better future - like many of us.

Sometimes, if I need to let off steam, I go to see her down in the hangar and she is willing to listen to me and my problems. On the contrary, she does not really like talking about herself, I have understood this by now, but I know how to be very patient, as well as very curious, and I am sure that sooner or later she too will confide in me. For the moment, I'm just happy to gossip with her about Addison's and Tann's.

[oceansmelodysblog]

Hyrule High School

Promotional fiction for @zelquiwi​ ‘s fanart on Twitter

Chapter 1

Zelda said goodbye to her ballet coach and stepped out into the sultry evening sun. A cooling breeze blew into her face and dried her sweaty face. She undid her braid and let the breeze blow through her hair. Zelda relaxed mentally and walked along the pavement. Bicyclists sped past her, twirling her white polka-dotted red summer dress. She shyly held her hem so as not to expose too much, as the dress only covered half of her thigh. She wore a white short shirt under her dress, white sporty shoes and a small bag with her ballet clothes.

The roar of cars and motorbikes deafened her ears, pedestrians shouted at each other, the paths were too crowded. Fathers and mothers with prams and people in wheelchairs were disregarded and jostled.

Dogs barked at each other while being held back with difficulty by their owners.

Zelda found the chaos too much, so she decided to take a diversion today, away from the main roads.

Fascinated, she watched the retro facades of the narrow streets, the colourful hubbub of the restaurants and the welcome invitations from the waiters to take Zelda to the restaurant. She smiled off gratefully and walked briskly along the paths.

She loved to stroll the streets after her hard ballet practice before returning home bored. As the 15-year-old pubescent daughter of a diplomat and a lawyer, the highest discipline was expected of her. It was tough, but she couldn't complain as it opened many doors for her.

When Zelda finally arrived at her front door, she sighed loudly. She knew the summer holidays were coming to an end and with it her freedom to devote herself fully to her hobbies.

Zelda moved gracefully through the corridors of the school to her classroom in her white blouse, navy blue school uniform blazer and matching skirt and was greeted warmly by her classmates, although she treated everyone equally, she felt most comfortable in the presence of her best friends Impa and Purah. The two were siblings with a year's difference, though they could be as different as night and day. While Purah was older than Impa, she was still a bright and fashionable model student in science. Impa, on the other hand, was the more sensible of the two, very well-versed in languages, politics, history and the subject of Hylia's teachings. While Zelda excelled in all subjects, the poor marks in the teachings of Hylia cast a mocking shadow over her report cards every time.

While Mipha, Robbie and Revali joined them, they were talking about their experiences of the summer holidays when the other students suddenly fell silent. It was still too early for one of the teachers, so the troop turned around curiously.

A young man about their age with blond spiky hair tied back stood in front of the blackboard and greeted everyone curtly.  He stood there with his chest erect and sporting clothes, scratching the back of his head nervously.

" Are you lost Link?" asked Revali mockingly.

"Revali don't be so rude. I hope you are all right." intervened Mipha. A girl who was always sweet and polite to everyone.

"Where the heck have you been all these holidays!" blurted out Impa.

"I'm fine, thanks," Link said, giving Mipha a smile without bothering to give Revali a glance. "I've been helping out in the countryside all summer." His gaze drifted from Impa to Zelda, who paid him no attention. "Hope you didn't miss me too much." He winked at Paya , Impa's and Purah's cousin, who blushed every time Link flirted with her.

He immediately noticed that the rest of the girls were also looking in his direction, whispering and giggling amongst themselves. They couldn't be blamed, because Link had an attractive charisma, fascinating blue eyes, an athletic figure and above all something mysterious about him, which was attractive to many girls.

"Don't pretend you'll be missed, you poor beggar have to sweep up cows' shit on your farm."

He whirled around and stared renegade at Revali, running towards him, but when both grabbed each other by the collar, Sakasai intervened while Cado and Dorian held them back.

"The holidays are only over, yet you are feuding blood. Let's enjoy this year peacefully!", Sakasai soothingly talked to them. His poetic expression was able to melt even ice-cold icebergs.

 Just when the situation had defused, the bell rang for the start of class and the teacher, Mr Daruk, entered the room.

"Link, Revali. As soon as you make eye contact, you bark like dogs fighting for territory in the street. I have a new seating plan here that will make sure you two sit far apart."

Mr Daruk was the linguistics and labour teacher. He was dark-skinned, broad-shouldered, with a muscular chest and a round beer belly. His white hair pointed in all directions and his full white beard went down to his stomach. He always prepared us, apart from the lessons, for the hard life after school. For which Link was particularly grateful, as he had to struggle especially hard in his neighbourhood.

"Revali, you will sit in the front row next to Mipha. Sakasai, please sit next to Paya. Link, you will sit next to Zelda." As an indignant murmur went through the class, the teacher thumped the teacher's desk, creating a silence that had never existed before. "I demand discipline! Now sit down at your assigned seats. You will see that you and your new neighbours will complement each other. Now to the order of the day..."

As he sat down, he felt how uncomfortable it was to sit next to Zelda, as she obviously couldn't stand him.

Therefore, he slid as far as he could to the edge of his chair so as not to get too close to her.

Link barely caught what the teacher was saying, he was too taken with her closeness. To keep a clear mind, he pulled his hood over his head and rested his head on his arms, which were folded on the table. He sighed. It was going to be a busy day at school, he thought to himself.

  "Hey bro, you alright? Up for basketball?" asked Sidon, who was his best friend, despite the fact that he was in a different class from his year. He was a hunk and towered over him by several heads. He had red hair, like his sister Mipha, but gold-shimmering eyes. Despite his imposing and intimidating manner, he was the most likeable Hylian he knew.

"Ayyo Bro, how you doin'? Throw me the ball!"

Link took off his hoodie and bared his muscular torso. He wanted to clear his head and stop thinking about how annoyed Zelda was at his presence. He wasn't even sure why she was and assumed she was looking down on him with her domineering appearance.

The mere fact that he had put his head down on the table and was boredly playing with his pens made her breathe an annoyed sigh and tap her foot impatiently. She was also the first to immediately pack up her utensils and disappear out the door without giving him a glance.

While he was shooting baskets with his best buddies, he was joined by the rest of his friends, including Cado and Dorian, one slim and athletic, the other broadly built. More boys gathered around him, whom he knew from his neighbourhood or from his sports clubs. He greets them all with a handshake and a brotherly hug: a fist to the brother's shoulders. This is how they signal solidarity and friendship to each other.

Sometimes they were joined by Impa, who would then go up against the boys and single-handedly finish them off in every game. Impa was a girl Link liked to have around because she was unbeatable. She was like a second sister to him, whom he respected and wanted to protect at the same time.

But when Link looked out for her, he found her agog with Zelda Purah and Paya discussing something and smirked. He could only guess what they were so animatedly discussing at the moment.

 "Phew, Link put some clothes on, your armpits stink big time."

Abruptly Link's mood changed, as if someone had hit him in the head with a shovel.

"It only started to smell when you got here, Revali."

The young Revali was not much taller than Link, had his hair braided into a boxer braid while two white dyed strands hung out of his braided hair. He had the eye shape of a snake and his eye colour and character were just as venomous. He was always out to make Link's life difficult and to flaunt his parents' wealth.

"Do you want to mess with me? You street dog have nothing to say to me, is that clear?" said Revali provocatively. Just like Link, he was surrounded by his boys waiting to bash each other's heads in.

"You can't do anything but play hardball, come on get lost with your wannabe gangsters."

A horde of girls from different years, cheered Link's and Revali's names as if it was some kind of competition.

Link wrinkled his nose contemptuously and stared renegiously into Revali's eyes. As a final sign of warning.

Sidon noticed the sparkling fire in the eyes of the two rivals and walked between them and stood protectively in front of Link.

"Hey yo bro, how about we settle this problem between you with a contest".

The girls who were just now cheering and gushing for Revali or Link were now screeching Sidon's name together as if his presence could put all disputes aside.

"A competition? Only if I choose the discipline. ", Revali said, but Link was about to intervene when his best friend held him back.

"We will choose three disciplines. Everyone will get one discipline they are particularly good at, while the third will remain neutral. Okay?" asked Sidon. Link nodded in agreement. Now it was up to Revali.

"On one condition, we're going to put this competition out to the whole school so everyone can watch me kick the shit out of that son of a bitch."

"Be careful what you say, we don't want your ego to be hurt anymore." Countered Link and turned away. It was already a foregone conclusion for him that he had to face his rival and win.

  Zelda watched the action of the rival boys while Impa and Purah argued about which motto would be more appropriate as a house party. She squinted over at the silent Paya looking distressed at the tense troop of boys on the basketball court. Zelda followed her gaze and immediately understood her expression. It was Link, who moved away from the group and sat down on a wooden bench, running his hands through his hair.

"Paya, go to him. He will be very happy to receive emotional affection from a pretty girl, like you. He might fall in love with you after all," Zelda said hopefully.

She shyly looked Zelda in the eye and turned bright red in the face. Purah and Impa interrupted their discussion and listened in wonder.

"That's right, Paya! Go get him!" Purah, Paya's eldest cousin, motivated her. Everyone knew that Paya was crazy about Link but was too shy to talk to him.

When Paya finally decided to go to him, Impa was about to stop her, but Zelda and Purah held her back. Impa didn't like it, because she knew Link very well and also knew what his heart was like. Her gaze rested on Zelda, who was looking contentedly behind Paya. Maybe she had to get involved after all and a house party by the pool would be the best option.

[thefreshfinds]

Soul Food: The Fine Arts - Sugar Shacks

By: Natalee Gilbert

With open arms, Soul Food: The Fine Arts took in all walks of life and allowed passionate creatives to express theirselves freely. Beyond a non-existent canvas, souls were captivated by the performer’s artistic flair. Through the means of all-around awareness, relatability and just having fun — Soul Food: The Fine Arts created a settling ambience. But really, it was everyone involved who made this event worthwhile. It was hard to not take notice of the musician and poet’s way with words. In the hands of urgency, they reeled out inner thoughts, doubts even fears. Other times, they would lend a hand (with precaution). Still, everyone was there to simply enjoy the arts. Sparks flied, friendships rekindled and networks formulated in a smooth manner.

A tale of all tales — Soul Food: The Fine Arts is one for the books. Certainly, this event will go down in history.

Here are 5 creatives that I had the pleasure to speak to with at this diverse event and thank you Big Dawg K for the opportunity:

Ivan Polanco: A singer/songwriter who creates R&B and acoustic pop music — Ivan Polanco is one who provides within his lyrics that he’s just a young man growing up in this day in age. Sure, every guy has love/heartbreak songs but for him its to a certain extent. In his perspective, his music speaks about what a young man encompasses during his growth. Sonically, Ivan’s voice embodies real emotion and care. Moreso, it’s very soft, crystallized and adaptable to change when needed be. Initially Polanco started his music career with the drums. Since his dad was also fond of singing and songwriting, he would play the drums for him from time to time. But Pacheco’s dad seen it more as a hobby. Being a self-taught musician, Ivan decided to dabble into singing and sought to write his own music. A source says that Polanco knew Big Dawg K earlier on. But they lost contact, reconnected and discovered (10 years later) that they both were still making music. In a span of 9 years, Polanco has released 4 albums. Currently, he’s working on another called To Grow. Essentially, it comes with the notion that “this man is 26,” he’s grateful for those he’s encountered and very proud of his journey. Besides being an artist, Polanco is a personal trainer. His advice to all is to be happy with who you are. “Find your voice.” he adds.

LINKS:

1. Website: https://ivanpolanco.com/home

2. Instagram: @ivanpolanco.music

Bobby Sanchez: Bobby Sanchez is one who passes it forward. In the name of education — Sanchez does his part in informing the world about current issues that are (sometimes) unheard of. But really, he wants to be more than heard. Sanchez aims to decolonize the way others think and reconstruct the past in a narrative that’s centered around the indigenous perspective. Apart from this, Sanchez’s cadence depicts the pain felt by our ancestors. In pursuit, his words are taken with much intensity and remembrance. A 24 year old hip-hop artist and poet from New Rochelle, New York — Bobby Sanchez started writing raps/poetry seriously after leaving high school. Back then, it helped him to find purpose and healed him from the depression he was going through at the time so, he went with it. At the break of dawn, Sanchez keeps his family in mind because they keep him motivated. Funnily enough, his ancestors are also a source for inspiration. Sanchez adds “I can feel their [his ancestors] presence on a daily basis.” A strength of his in music, comes from the truth. “It takes courage to speak out against issues that others are not talking about.” For instance, his song “Pasion” was him, looking within to find a truth. To warm up, he reads books about new concepts so it can be added between the lines of his rhymes. “Most books have to do with colonialism, relating to Latin America, as well as indigenous cosmology.” Sanchez says. Currently, Sanchez is sitting on about 9-10 songs. He plans on releasing them every week for the next couple of months.

LINKS:

1. Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/bobbysanchezmusic

2. Instagram: @bobbysanchezmusic

Lady Kay: The saying “..walk a mile in someone else's shoes.” goes a pretty long way. Especially when you’re Lady Kay. At most, empathic — Lady Kay possesses the skill to feel and understand. As part of her execution, Lady Kay gives a powerful delivery when it comes to speaking the world’s truth. Still, it gets tough for her to do so, when revealing her own. To define her style, Kay says its moreso persona poems. Essentially, Kay goes into their perspective but it can get difficult at times when she has to come for herself. For instance Kay’s poem ‘Don’t Sleep With An Artist’ takes a jab at those who get romantically involved with artist. And funnily enough, she is an artist. Sometimes, she even offends those who listen unintentionally because they believe her poem is about them. But, she’s just doing her part through bold statements and social awareness. Lady Kay put the pen to the pad in 3rd grade. Then she pursued spoken word after high school. Kay adds “I’m not really emotional, but I can write out feelings.” Really, this is what pushed her towards poetry. Now, Kay is apart of a collective called Femsovl. The goal for all 3 is to create events that are calm, cool and collected. In Kay’s words, she relates with this: “To speak your truth whether on a soap box or stage. Its all you" From her poetry, Lady Kay wants others to feel the intensity. She is currently working on a book that’ll include short stories, interactive pieces and illustrations.

LINKS:

1. Instagram: @kaybeethelady

Smoove Babii: One who armors the heart on his sleeve — Smoove Babii speaks from within and astounds others with his familiarity on personal experiences. But really, he self-identifies as “a fireball of energy who just demands attention with his presence.” Smoove Babii comes with the intent of being a safe haven for those who need it. He’d like for people to feel safe when they tune in. However, what he really means is that he’d like for others to feel safe being theirselves. Babii adds “I want them to feel safe by knowing their not the only ones in life going through or has been through what they might experience.” In a passionate tonality, Babii is able to reel out inner emotions. To put it further, his poetry is raw, aggressive and often times, understanding. Likewise, there’s no theme to his mastery. “My mood really determines how creative my poetry gets.” Smoove Babii says. Speaking of which, his favorite verse out of his poems is: What to do? Is the question I ask myself every day. MJ has been trying to tell us for years that, THEY DON'T REALLY CARE ABOUT US! So, I talk to THE MAN IN THE MIRROR as I put my coat on. Everybody wants to be THRILLER but they out there trying to make us GHOST! I get BUTTERFLIES in my stomach every time I walk out my door. Seeing who's trying to ROCK WITH ME! Hope my family doesn't have to REMEMBER THE TIMES I MOONWALK back through my door. Look at my brothers as JACKSON 5 and go to school to learn my ABCs and make it easy as 123 and stop leaving BILLY JEANS and chasing these girls to ROCK THEY WORLD! We all are not SCARECROWS, WE ALL HAVE BRAINS, we must show them that WE ARE NOT ALONE and together we are INVINCIBLE so they can just BEAT IT with all those images of all us being SMOOTH CRIMINALS! This is bigger than being BLACK OR WHITE, that's why I get down on my knees and pray at night. Not to forgive me for my sins or beg to let me in but for forgiveness, just in case the cops have to JOE JACKSON me and I can't see my kids. 

From Smoove Babii’s upcoming poetry expect it to be more personal, deep, and talk about adventures that have formed him into who he is. Also, expect poetry albums and poetry EP’s as well. Maybe even a collab with Oliver The Writer. His first EP is out now on SoundCloud. It’s called Welcome To My Ghetto Gospel.

LINKS:

1. Soundcloud: https://m.soundcloud.com/user-515974176/sets/welcome-to-my-ghetto-gospel

2. Instagram: @smoovebabii

Acoustic Cat: Acoustic Cat reminds us why we fell in love with music to begin with. As he goes to great lengths to bring back fine tunes, Acoustic Cat adds his flair through guitar progressions and gruffness. Likewise, Cat goes for a sound that’s more 60’s-70’s. To start off, Acoustic Cat got his big break after joining a rock/medal band. Although he toured around New York City with them and considered them “brothers”, Cat ventured off on his own. To describe what he goes for, its moreso a “naked” sound. In a word it’s an exploration of rock, jazz and everything in between. On the other hand, Acoustic Cat says his now-solo career is a learning curve. But the more he does it, the easier it gets. One message he tries to tell others is to stay positive. Through life’s ups and downs, Cat won’t stop until his sound becomes universal.

LINKS:

1. Website: www.acousticcat.com

2. Instagram: @theacousticcat

[treadmilltreats]

10 tips for changing your life

So this week I've talked about narcissism, I've talked about my freedom from my divorce 7 years ago and then yesterday I wrote about holding on and don't giving up when you're at the end of your rope.

So today I want to give you tips on how to change your life if you are in a horrible situation. These tips helped me when I was miserable and helped me turn my life around. But like anything in life, the change has to start with you.

In AA they teach us that to overcome an addiction you first must admit you have a problem. This is also true in any aspect of your life, you must admit you have a problem, you've allowed that person to treat you like this, you allowed them to take away your self esteem, you allowed this to go on for so long. Now please don't think that I'm pointing fingers or giving all the  blame to you, I'm not. I know how this happens but I'm just stating the facts, which is you're in this situation because you allowed it to happen just like I did.

I raised my hand that I allowed it and you must too. You must take responsibility for your actions in order to change. So now that you admitted that this is a problem in your life, now you can take the steps to change it.

It has to come to a point when you're done, when enough is enough, when you just can't take it one minute longer, so now that you're there I'm going to tell you these steps to start to change your life.

 

1.The first step Is to keep a  gratitude journal.

 

Everyday write down something that you're grateful for, start small if you have to but do it every day. You'll be amazed by how much this works.

2. You have to grow tough skin.

I know that at this point you're used to it, you used to be called names, being put down but as you change so will the abuse. It will get rough so learn how to deal with it, learn to meditate, start yoga and go inside to your happy place when they are coming down on you. Mine was my house. I kept imagining it, peaceful, calm and filled with joy.

To keep your attitude right, put up post notes on your mirror, in your car, on your phone. Keep telling yourself that you're beautiful, you're strong, you can do this, anything that's going to inspire you. Anything that will put you in a different mindset and make you feel stronger.

3. Listen to music that will inspire you.

 Whether it be the theme from Rocky, Christina Aguilera, Mary J. Blige, Gloria Gaynor's, I will survive. Anything that will inspire you to feel stronger, listen to it over and over until it gives you that courage.

4. Start educating yourself.

Start reading books, start listening to Podcasts or YouTube videos, anything that is motivational or inspiring. You need to put that in your head every single day. Listen to other people's stories of survival, it's amazing what you'll get out of what other people have been through and survived.

6. Take classes.

 

I know that during the pandemic  we can't go out but there's always groups on Facebook or Zoom, to take a class. It could be a motivational class, a finance class, how to manage money, any class to get your self esteem back. You must invest in yourself.

7. Be around like minded people.

These are people who want to change, who are willing to put in the effort to change. It's amazing how much you can lift each other up. You'll start thinking if they can do it, so can I.

8. Reconnect with your family and friends.

They probably pulled you away from them in the past, but right now you need that support system because trust and believe when you leave you won't have anybody that you thought were "our" friends, you will be all alone.

9. Have a plan in place.

Start planning your exit route, put money away every week from the groceries. Start to buy things you know you need in advance and give it to a friend to hold. Start saying you lost your jewelry and pawn it, I'm serious here, every cent you get, put it away. Start looking for places to live and how much they are, get your resume in order if you haven't worked in a while, see what jobs are out there. If he's watching your every move, go to a friend's or a library with a computer to do this. Get together your important papers and bring them to a friend's or family's house. But get your exit plan started 

10. Know that this won't be easy.

I'm sorry, most of you know I'm not Willy Wonker, I don't sugar coat shit. I want you to know in advance that at first this will be the hardest thing you've ever done but it will be so worth it. 

You need to know that sometimes it will feel like you're  taking 2 steps forward and 3 steps back. You will question everything that you're dealing  and maybe even think you can't  do this and you want to go back. (I never once thought that but everyone is different)

It will be hard but don't give up. keep your eye on the prize. Which is living a peaceful life with no one telling you what to do, how to do it, no one putting you down every single minute of every single day and that is priceless.

So today my friends these are my 10 tips for changing your life for the better. 

Trust me you will get there, you will become the person that you always was and always knew that you could be. You too, will be living an incredible life, free from drama, abuse and heartache but in order to get there, you must do these 10 steps first.

"Be the change you want to see"

 

"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

**Now released my latest book**

The Blessing in Disguise.... revealed

https://www.amazon.com/Blessing-Disguise-Revealed-story-faith/dp/1074340493/ref=sr_1_19?keywords=the+blessing+in+disguise&qid=1561392004&s=books&sr=1-19

***Now available***

My 1st book The blessing in Disguise 

Selling on my website

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Http://www.treadmilltreats.com

And on Amazon.com

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[chronicleofaquarterlifecris-blog]

Inspirational Conversations with my Bestie

Summer

Ryan is gone all weekend for summer camp so I'm trying not to be lonely. Or think about what its going to be like in 2 months.

 

Bestie 

So you're still wanting to break up

Summer

That's nice that you can have the occasional beer. 

Bestie 

Yeah it is

Summer

Yeah, I'm going to help him move to Florida in August, then come back here in September.

Bestie 

Does he know

Summer

Yeah, we talk about everything.

He's my best friend. 

Bestie 

Aw

Summer

It makes it really tough but I know in my gut that it's time to go.

Bestie 

That's super healthy. I can't relate lol

Summer

I know it, but I question it all the time.

Haha awh

I'm leaving Rocky with him.



Bestie 

Really?!!!

Summer

Just for a while... Not forever.

I just don't know what my life will be like and I don't want to put her through trauma... and Chloe is her best friend.

Bestie 

I see aw it's like s divorce

Summer

I just... don't know what else to do.

I know. 

But I know it's right.

It's just fucking hard.

And stupid. Ha

Bestie 

It is hard it's not stupid

Summer

It feels like I'm leaving a sure thing for the unknown. But I know that the sure thing isn't what I want. At least not right now.

Bestie 

It's really hard for me to be alone. You're so brave

Summer

I know we're both excited and scared.

I can feel it from him too.

I'm not brave. haha I just can't ignore my gut.

It vomits if I do. 

Bestie 

Ha it's still very brave. I'm proud of you always! And honestly if it's meant to be it'll happen. You've always had your doubt about the relationship though

Summer

I know. Formal.

*forreal.

My gut is like YELLING at me now. Haha

But its been an absolutely superb ride. It always is.

The last two years have been insane. So crazy. But also so lovely.

I'm so grateful for my life and my friends, and ryan and my puppies and my family and opportunities. Life is really good.

And it will always have good things.

Bestie 

Definitely

Summer

And sometimes it will be stupid and hard and shitty

But it will always have good things.

And I know that.

Bestie 

Absolutely

Summer

And I will be okay.

And you will be okay, too sissy.

Bestie 

Of course you will

Summer

And of course you will be too.



Bestie 

Thank you sis! I am hopeful that my relationship will work but I am still sad about everything especially when things get better. I feel guilty when he and I are having a good time because I feel like I should still be mad at him or not with him. It's not what I want though. I want my family to be together.

Summer

Hey, it's okay. You're okay.

Here's the thing.

Don't "should" on yourself.

That's what my uncle told my aunt on his deathbed.

"I wish I wouldn't have shoulded on myself." I wish I would have LIVED more, done what I wanted to do. Lived the way I wanted to live.

LIVE Bestie. Stay true to your gut.

Stay present.

Think about right now. Is everything okay right now? Yes? Then live in it. Love in it. Be in it.

You are so smart and strong. In the future, if something happens, then think about it then.

You forgave him? Good. Then forgive him. Of course have your guard up if anything happens again.

But don't should on yourself, love.

Bestie 

Okay. That's the thing I don't want to make the wrong decision

Summer

Who cares what anyone says. Fuck them.

Whatever decision you make will be the decision you make.

You will never know if it is the right or wrong decision.

Bestie 

People are just worried and that's understand

Summer

Of course.

Bestie 

You're right

Summer

But this is your life, love.

You are the only one that gets to make your decisions.

Bestie 

'Cause it's not just me. It's my baby too

Summer

And sometimes, yes, they will be shitty ones. But you will learn from them.

Yes, but if she is not in danger, then she is okay.

If something happens again, you re-evaluate.

Or even if you just change your mind one day.

You're allowed to do that.

You're not stuck in anything. You are in control. 

Bestie 

Very true. I guess now I'm trying to make the right decision the first time

Summer

You want to enjoy your family? Enjoy it. You can't pretend it didn't happen. It's impossible. But it doesn't have to taint everything.

You will know in your heart when it is time to go.

There will be a voice that whispers "go, go, go"

And if you keep making the choice to stay, it will get louder and louder. You will know.

Bestie 

Yep ugh that's scary

Summer

Of course it is.

Life is fucking scary.

Haha

But its also so fucking beautiful.

Life is heartbreak and disaster and breakups and breakdowns...

But life is also your babyyour baby giggles, sunrises over mountains, listening to the rain in a tent, laughing in a car with the windows down...

Life is tragic and it is also beautiful.

It's a shit show and its a comedy.

And no one gets out alive.

So live. And enjoy.

Bestie 

Agh yes you're giving me life

Summer

I just admitted on a girls love travel post how terrified I am of traveling internationally after September and some girl said to me, "You have no one but yourself to answer to so you'll have countless opportunities to discover yourself at the raw root of who you are and who you really want to be."

Summer

It seems so relevant to this convo.

And to everything. Haha

Bestie 

Right?! I love that

Summer

I love it too.

And I love you.

You will always have me.

And I will always have you.

And that makes me feel so much better. Haha

Bestie 

Always

Summer





Bestie 



Me too

Summer



Bestie 

Very blessed to have you

🤗

Summer

I'm so blessed to have you too! 

HEY forreal though.

Bestie 

Yes

Summer

Get out that journal that is buried under all those papers and whatnot.

And WRITE about it.

Write all your shitty insides out on paper. Don't hide anything from yourself.

Shove it under your mattress or whatever.

Bestie 

I know I've been writing but I only do it when I'm angry. I need to write everyday

Yes

Summer

But WRITE. You will feel awkward at first, but every day, just write something.

"I ate a ham sandwich for lunch"

Bestie 

I do feel awkward

Haha

Summer

"it tastes like poop... everything tastes like poop. life is poop. poop."

Bestie 

Ok I will get back to it for sure

Haha

Summer

And then all the sudden you're like "and, and, and, and"

"And you know what? FUCK IT ALL. I AM GOOD ENOUGH. I WILL DO IT. Fuck em!"

And you feel all refreshed and badass and powerful.

And in control.

Bestie 

Yeah. I've been writing about my days. It's been hard reliving stuff. Maybe that's why I took a break

Summer

Yeah, I understand that.

Bestie 

My mom told me start with my graduation weekend and it was so long. I was exhausted writing it

Summer

Well then don't start with it. Haha

Start with ham sandwich.

You don't have to should, even there.

Especially there.

Bestie 

Right

Summer

I mean you *should* write butttt 

Haha

And yoga.

I freaking love Yoga

Bestie 

Lol yeah working out is good

I'm going to sleep now love. I love you! This was a wonderful talk.

Summer

Me too! Haha

I love you!!

Sleep well! 

And know that all is well. 

Type a message...

[celebritylive]

Valerie Harper‘s husband Tony Cacciotti is giving fans an update on the longtime actress’ health.

In a Facebook post shared on Tuesday morning, Cacciotti, 78, revealed how doctors had advised that his wife of 32 years be moved to hospice care amid her battle with cancer.

Despite their professional opinion, Cacciotti said he was not willing to listen to them because of how much he adored Harper, 79, and vowed to keep his wife as comfortable as possible in some of the final moments of her life.

“I have been told by doctors to put Val in Hospice care and I can’t and I won’t because of the amazing good deeds she has graced us with while she’s been here on earth,” he wrote in the post.

While the couple’s friend Deanna started a GoFundMe on Harper’s behalf last week, the page, which had raised over $66,100 from Harper’s friends, family, and beloved fans, has since been shut down after members of the entertainment industry stepped forward to help with Harper’s medical expenses.

“She did so much for so many people and once they heard what was happening, they all started coming forward,” Cacciotti tells PEOPLE about the support he and Harper have received. “Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine it would happen like this. It’s really amazing.”

“I just didn’t want to put her into hospice care and now we’re going to be able to keep her here at home,” Cacciotti adds. “She’s hanging in there. We have good days and we have tough days.”

Harper, best known for her role as Rhoda Morgenstern on The Mary Tyler Moore Show, was diagnosed with leptomeningeal carcinomatosis in 2013.

The condition, which the star was diagnosed with just four years after she beat lung cancer in 2009, occurs when cancer cells spread into the fluid-filled membrane surrounding the brain, known as the meninges.

RELATED: Valerie Harper’s Family Launches GoFundMe to Help with Medical Expenses Amid Cancer Treatment

At the time of her diagnosis, doctors told her she only had three months to live, but Harper beat the odds and continued to live well beyond their expectations by six years.

Because of how unbelievably rare her story is, Cacciotti said he refuses to give up on his wife.

“We will continue going forward as long as the powers above allow us, I will do my very best in making Val as comfortable as possible,” Cacciotti wrote in the Facebook post. “There are two special ANGELS on this planet masquerading as humans who live and work together, that have made it possible to have all of Val’s needs taken care of.”

“For those of you who have been in this position, you will totally understand that ‘it’s hard letting go,'” he continued. “So as long as I’m able and capable, I’ll be where I belong right beside her.”

“Many, many thanks for your outpouring of kindness and support,” Cacciotti finished before signing the note with “Tony”.

The couple’s friend Deanna also left a note at the bottom of the post, writing, “We are so grateful for your love and support. I will continue to provide updates on Valerie’s Facebook page from time to time as we know that you will be thinking about her.”

RELATED: Valerie Harper’s Rare Cancer Explained

In the description of the GoFundMe fundraiser she started, Deanna said Harper was receiving treatments on a daily basis, but noted how they had been “unrelenting,” “continuous” and not entirely covered under the actress’ health insurance.

“Valerie is currently taking a multitude of medications and chemotherapy drugs as well as going through extreme physical and painful challenges now with around the clock, 24/7 care immediately needed which is not covered by insurance,” she continued. “This is just part of the daily cost that is without a doubt a financial burden that could never be met alone.”

“This GoFundMe initiative from Tony to ensure she receives the best care possible,” Deanna added. “Your care and support is greatly appreciated.”

RELATED: Valerie Harper Says She’s ‘Ready To Go’ and Has Made Peace With Her Cancer Diagnosis

Harper is best known for playing Rhoda Morgenstern on The Mary Tyler Moore Show in the 1970s. Her incredible performance in the role earned her many awards, as well as her own spinoff show Rhoda, from 1974 to 1978.

The actress later went on to star in the 1980s sitcom Valerie, which was later titled Valerie’s Family and The Hogan Family, once Harper left the show.

After being diagnosed with leptomeningeal carcinomatosis, the actress defied the odds and lived beyond what doctors expected, but continued to undergo chemotherapy.

Speaking with PEOPLE in 2015, Harper explained that she was at peace with her diagnosis.

“I’m ready. I’m ready to go,” Harper admitted. “Maybe that’s the secret. That I’m absolutely – I don’t want to, my God, I want to live to be 102, but I am not banking on anything, really, because we shouldn’t. We don’t know what’s around the corner. I think you just take each day and get the best out of it and do what you can and have fun.”

Harper also revealed to PEOPLE in 2017 that the secret to her survival was her devoted caregiver husband.

“He’s such a nudge,” the four-time Emmy-winner said of Cacciotti, her former personal trainer. “He does everything for me, drives me everywhere, makes sure I’m eating healthy, walking and lifting weights. Really, he’s the best nudge in the world.”

from PEOPLE.com https://ift.tt/2y44zAO