#but was physically incapable of remembering unless i was in my car so as soon as i left the car i kept fucking forgetting.

[marklikely]

going to be established with a pcp for the first time in my adult life this afternoon and as unlikely as it is part of me is trying to work out what 4d chess i could play to get medication that fixes my brain jn some way

[euporie-art]

oh!! i cant remember ever being tagged in smthn like this woah thank you!!!

last song: the judgement is the mirror by dalis car (fucking banger)

favourite colour: either honey-yellow or black

last book: the hound of the baskervilles

last tv show: The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson (1979 Soviet TV with Vasily Livanov)

last movie: the cowboy bebop movie (it kinda sucked balls tbh... not as good as the main show. faye valentine they did you so dirty)

sweet/savoury/spicy: savoury > spicy > sweet

relationship status: taken, i've had a very lovely boyfriend for 5 yrs

last thing I googled: "the return of sherlock holmes paperback"(i am incapable of focusing on a book unless its a physical copy lmao)

current obsession: the great ace attorney, plus the sherlock holmes worms creeping in my brain

looking forward to: i'm going to an 80s alternative night at a local pub soon! i'm excited as fuck

tagging: ahhh i don't want to nag anyone, so anyone feel free to do this!

✨ten people i’d like to get to know better ✨

ty for the tag @eriklehnsherrr !!!!

last song: b2b by charli xcx ft. tinashe

favourite colour: blood orange!

last book: intermezzo by sally rooney (same as prev lol)

last tv show: iasip (rewatch 😔)

last movie: challengers (yet another rewatch)

sweet/savoury/spicy: savoury > sweet > spicy

relationship status: single 💔

last thing I googled: "remy rat"

current obsession: red hood! but the batfam in general

looking forward to: bookfest! hopefully I can find good cds this time 😁😁

tagging: @lovecrimer @myvirtuesuncounted @crow-enthusiast @destroyingangelneveragod @stinkrat-aleks @monsterrae1 @cantchangemypast @probablychemical @savebylou @itolduthings

[bradypnoea]

Healing Factor | indelen | (42/42) - 121k | May ‘20 - Mar ‘21

Loki was lucky to survive the devastating car crash that very nearly claimed his life. Now, resting and recuperating in his brother's home he has every care and amenity available to help his recovery. A professional physical therapist was hired by Thor Odinson to help get his brother back on his feet. But for the young woman the assignment is not nearly as straight forward as it first may seem. The accident is merely the final link in a chain of traumatic experiences that inflicted wounds far worse than any number of broken bones. And it's not as if Loki was a friendly man to begin with. Shrewd, caustic, mischievous and introverted, incapable of straightforward communication, lacking in patience and not overburdened with an excess of empathy Loki is the worst possible kind of patient to have. Unless, of course, you’re the type to enjoy the challenge…

Note: Healing Factor has 13219 hits and deserves every one, like, I was lucky to read this story as it was posted in real time and I remember thinking by the fourth chapter that it would be one of my all-time favourites. I can't praise it highly enough: the characters, the pacing, the plot points, the texting, the dialogue, the tension, the resolving of the tension. It felt like a return to my favourite works of the 2012-2015 era. Indelen's writing is quick and intelligent, questions are posed to the reader and answered as they arise. I just- I'll stop and let the work speak for itself but if you can, avoid reading the Series Title on AO3. The OFC's first name is intentionally withheld and I promise it will be SO satisfying to read the moment its revealed. And as soon as you finish, read the next installment in the series, "In Care Of", of which Indelen has just posted the ninth chapter.

- Author's Tumblr | @indelen -

It is not my habit to make semi-flirtatious banter with a man about to interview me for a job as this is, of course, completely unprofessional.

And it is definitely not my habit to make semi-flirtatious banter with a man whom I knew to be married, no matter how obviously in jest the comments were meant to be. After all, even the most innocuous joke can be misconstrued.

And yet, when the front door of a modern upstate New York home opened and nothing short of a Norse god made flesh and mortal stood before me, all that popped out of my mouth was:

“Oh, my goodness gracious! Are you the one that needs round the clock care?”

Look.

If you were there.

And you saw him.

You would have done the same.

Thor Odinson was tall, fair, with cornflower blue eyes and perfect skin. His shoulders were broad and well muscled, his posture was comfortable and assured, his expression was bright and cheery. On hearing my words, he threw his head back and laughed. Even his laughter was energy itself; pure and friendly and unpretentious. Despite myself, I felt stuck down by his charm. It’s not even that he was remarkably handsome, though of course he was, it was that he projected immense health, joy and vitality.

Continue reading on AO3...

[leisurelypanda]

Here We Go Again chapter 16

Hazel was still brooding a week later. Actually, she became defiant. Refusing to do her homework unless one of them was there to make sure she’d done it. She refused to clean up after herself or eat at all unless she was really hungry. Michael had let her go hungry the first few times until she realized that refusing food was not going to sway him, especially after she had spilled hot soup on herself trying to reach the microwave. After that she just went to Michael to ask for food and he would either get up and reheat some food from that night or tell her to ask her father.

Not that she had apologized. Briar had tried on a couple occasions to get her parents to revoke their punishment so that Hazel would break out of her funk. Craig was tempted, but Michael assured him that she would get over it eventually. Amanda had behaved the same way once over something he couldn’t remember and had said the same things. It had been two weeks before she had come around again. No matter what happened between them, he was still her father. She’d come around eventually.

Still, Craig was a little down in the dumps himself. It didn’t help that he and Smashley had to leave for a week-long business trip in San Francisco. He delayed it for as long as he could, but eventually Michael told him to just go before he was in his third trimester and he was physically incapable of doing anything but eating, sleeping, and going to the bathroom without help. She had said goodbye before she had gone off to school that day, but she had still yet to apologize for what she said to him. And while Craig was still able to go about his business, Michael knew that it still hurt. Hopefully he would be able to get through to her in the week his bro was going to be gone.

They were quiet on the way to the airport. Craig had told him the details of the trip, but to be honest, Michael only followed some of it. He was a financial adviser. He could balance budgets and review stocks and give advice on investments and retirement funds and stuff like that. He knew next to nothing about sales and advertising and manufacturing and everything that Craig’s business did. Craig was good at his business, though, and Michael was proud of him and what he was able to accomplish.

“I’ll miss you,” he said as they stood embracing in the airport. He was crying a bit at the thought of Craig leaving for a whole week. It wasn’t his first business trip, but it was the first while he was pregnant. He would have to go to the doctor alone. Take care of the kids alone. Sleep in his bed alone. He had gotten used to Craig’s presence.

“I’ll miss you, too, bro,” Craig replied. “Don’t overexert yourself. Make sure the girls get their homework done. There’s plenty of leftovers in the fridge—”

“Thanks, superdad,” Michael interrupted. “I will, don’t worry.”

Craig gave a humorless chuckle. “Just… if she comes around while I’m gone, let me know,” he said as he pulled back. There were tears in his eyes. Michael rested a hand on his cheek.

“I will, I promise. Let me know when you land,” he replied.

Craig leaned down to kiss him gently on the mouth. “I love you, bro,” he whispered.

“I love you, too.”

They broke contact and Craig took his suitcase and began to cross the lobby to get in line. River began fussing around and Craig turned back around.

“Dada!” she cried. Craig scooped her up and left butterfly kisses on her cheek, making her giggle.

“You be good, tiny bro,” he said. Michael could tell he was trying to hold it together. He was trying to hold it together himself as he watched Craig hug River gently against his chest. After a few minutes, Craig handed her back to him and turned around to head back into line. He turned around again.

“I forgot to mention,” he said. “I asked my parents to come by and help you out while I’m gone. They should get there this afternoon.”

Michael’s mind raced with a mixture of relief and disbelief. He could, theoretically, take care of the kids on his own, but God was it going to be good to have some adults around to help him out. Especially grandparents, parenting pros.

“How did you forget to mention that?” he demanded. “Thank God!”

Craig just grinned. “Have fun,” he said. He turned around a walked away to get in line. Michael turned around and walked out of the building. If he watched him go, he would just start crying again and he really needed to avoid doing that until he got home. He waddled as fast as he could out of the building and got in the car. ******************************************************************************

Sure enough, as soon as he got home he noticed their car in the driveway. Considering they weren’t at the door, he assumed that they’d found the spare key. He walked up the porch with some difficulty. Great, he thought. Now I can’t even get up the stairs. With some effort and a lot of dependency on the railing, he managed to make it up the stairs and onto the threshold. He got into the house and leaned back against the door to catch his breath.

“Michael, there you are!” It was Courtney. She hastened over to him and helped him over to the living room. “You shouldn’t be on your feet, dear. Not at this time in the pregnancy.”

“I had to get Craig to the airport,” he said. “But thank you.”

Courtney helped ease Michael down onto the couch and scooted the ottoman over to him so he could put his feet up. He couldn’t help but lean back against the couch.

“Thank God Craig had the sense to call you,” he groaned.

“God knows neither of you is the sort to ask someone to help you out,” she replied. “I suspect he wouldn’t have if it weren’t for the fact that he can’t be in two places at once.”

“Guilty,” he replied.

“Now,” she said, standing up. “You hungry?”

“Starving,” he said. Bryce brought in a bowl of leftovers and gave it to him before he sat down in the recliner next to the couch to read his newspaper.

“Now son,” she said. “How have you been holding up?”

Michael told them all about how his second trimester had been going, how he’d had a few good days but overall still exhausted and sore. How he and Craig had been going to prenatal yoga classes to stay in shape but unless he was doing yoga with him, he could hardly walk anywhere without having to stop and take a rest every five minutes. He was extremely glad that he wasn’t having issues with his vision but he was nearly always hungry and never seemed to be able to get comfortable.

“I feel like I’m the size of a cow,” he said, sniffing. “They said that it would get easier during the second trimester, but I really just want to give birth so this will all be over.”

“I can’t imagine,” Courtney replied. “I was pregnant six times and some of them were rough but I never had to have two at once.”

“This is probably the universe’s way of punishing me for telling Joseph that anyone who voluntarily had more than two kids had to be insane,” he said. “Though that was before I knew he had four.”

Bryce chuckled from safely behind his newspaper. Courtney changed the subject. “Have you and Craig decided on names, yet?”

Michael wiped his eyes. “Not yet, but the list has been narrowed down,” he said. “Mostly because it turns out that nature themed names for boys are much harder to find than they are for boys.”

She rolled her eyes. “That boy,” she said. “Where he got this obsession with nature names is beyond me.”

“You mean you didn’t tell him that you wanted to be able to draw a landscape of your grandkids names?” Michael asked, teasing. “Why not? Who doesn’t want that?”

“Normal fucking people, you doofus,” she replied.

Michael gasped and placed his hands protectively over his stomach. “Hey, they’re supposed to be able to hear you now, you know,” he said, laughing. “They’re gonna come out of me cursing like sailors if you keep that up.”

Courtney laughed. “I would pay money to watch that happen.”

They talked for a while about whether Michael had a plan for the birth, which he did, but because he was 40 years old and having twins, the doctors were leaning towards a C-section. They talked about their converting the spare room into the new room for the twins. Which inevitably led to the fight between Hazel and Briar and the dramatic declaration of hatred. Courtney didn’t say anything, just nodded solemnly. There was no profanity, no sharp wit. Even Bryce closed his newspaper and set his hand in a steeple over his chest.

“Hazel’s been sulking ever since,” Michael said. He could feel the tears in his eyes forming again. “I want to think that we did the right thing, but it always sucked when Amanda did it.”

“It always sucks whenever anyone does it,” Courtney replied. “But the first time is always the worst.”

“I would just like to get through to her before Craig gets back from his trip,” he said.

“Well, I haven’t had a moody preteen in years,” Bryce chimed in, “but maybe we can figure something out. We’re grandparents, after all.” ****************************************************************

That afternoon, the girls got home from the bus and burst inside the house shouting for their grandparents. They ran into the living room where Bryce laughed and scooped them up in his traditional hug in greeting. Their backpacks flew to the floor as he swung them around. He set them down on the ground.

“Wait, what are you doing here?” Hazel asked. “I mean, it’s not our birthday or anything. Not that I’m not happy to see you, you know.”

“Your dad asked us if we could help out Michael around the house while he’s out on his business trip,” Courtney replied.

Hazel looked confused. “Dad’s on a business trip?” she asked. “When is he coming back? Why didn’t he tell us?”

“We told you several times, Hazel,” Michael said testily. “You always said you heard us.”

Hazel averted her eyes sheepishly but didn’t respond. Michael sighed.

“He’s coming back in a week,” he said.

“Do you think he’ll change his mind in a week?” she asked.

“No, not really,” he said.

“Why not?!” she demanded.

“Because,” he said looking her dead in the eyes. “It was my idea. I’m the one you need to convince.”

“But it’s not fair!” she shouted. “Tell him, Briar! Tell him it’s not fair!”

Briar looked like a deer in headlights, looking furtively between the adults in the room and her sister.

Poor kid, he thought. No one should have to be in her position.

“I…” she said. Hazel glared at her and she shrank back.

“I hate you all!” Hazel shrieked. She stomped off and ran up the stairs, making sure her stomps were as hard as she could muster. Briar collapsed against the couch and sighed. Michael cringed as he heard the door slam but he got up with some difficulty and walked over to Briar and put his hand on her shoulder. Courtney, meanwhile, followed her angsty granddaughter up the stairs.

“You okay, champ?” he asked.

“Yeah, it’s just…” she said. “Sometimes I just want to scream at her. Is that bad?”

“No, baby,” he said. “It’s normal to be frustrated with family sometimes. As long as you don’t take out those frustrations on them. It’s never okay to hurt the people you love.”

“Then why did you take her out of soccer?” she asked. “Isn’t that kind of hurting her?”

Michael thought for a moment. Damn it, why can’t kids ask easy questions?

He was saved by Bryce, who knelt down in front of her. “Briar, how did Hazel pretending to be you make you feel?”

“Bad,” she replied. “She always blamed me for everything that would get her into trouble.”

“And how many times did your parents tell her not to do that?” he responded.

“A lot,” she said. “Like, all the time. She never listened.”

“Exactly,” he said. “Hazel may not like being punished, but you don’t like taking the blame for what she does. Your parents don’t like getting calls from the school because you got in trouble for what she did. She didn’t listen, and now she has to live with the consequences. Do you understand?”

Briar sniffed but she nodded her head. Bryce smiled. “Good, now what do you say to some ice cream?”

Briar’s eyes widened and she smiled. “Before dinner? But won’t dad be upset?”

“Well,” Bryce said, straightening up to a standing position. “Don’t tell him. A little bit of ice cream when you’re sad never hurt anyone. Unless you’re lactose intolerant, I suppose.”

Briar giggled and followed him to the kitchen where he produced a half gallon container of chocolate ice cream. He put one finger to the side of his nose.

“Our little secret,” he whispered conspiratorially.

Briar laughed. “You got it, grandpa.”