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love-takes-work · 5 years ago

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When someone toxic needs a friend

I just wanna add a little personal reflection to the discussion of Spinel’s treatment in Steven Universe: The Movie.

A few signposts so you know where I’m starting with this:

A criticism I’ve seen:

Steven was not particularly warm to Spinel. He did not hug her. He did not offer to be her friend. He spoke carelessly and triggered her toward becoming murderous again. He only cared about what she could do for him.

A perspective I’ve seen:

LOTS of people with borderline personality disorder or strong feelings about abandonment personally relate to Spinel and are critical of Steven from this perspective.

Rebecca Sugar’s commentary on Spinel:

The thing about Spinel is that she’s a really toxic person.

She’s so toxic that she’s literally trying to poison people.

In my interactions with friends who have had a history difficult enough to make it hard for them to trust other people and sometimes even actively want to hurt others, it’s just a very difficult situation to navigate. In the case of Spinel and all of these characters, that’s extremely exaggerated because cartoons have the ability to be extreme exaggerations. I wanted to explore what it’s like when you’re trying to help someone who really doesn’t want to help themselves, who wants to embody the negative feelings that they have about themselves. I think that’s something really real. I hadn’t seen that in a cartoon before.

Spinel, unlike many other characters, actually has the goal of hurting people, which is new territory for the show. She really wants to hurt Steven, and there’s a reason that she does—because she’s in so much pain. I just wanted to explore all the dimensions of that.

I also think Steven has his way of trying to handle and dissolve conflict. It’s not necessarily a good way for him to handle this situation. It really leaves him in a difficult state, and I think what I wanted to show in the way that they interact is that at a certain point, when you can’t help someone, you have to be able to protect yourself.

Ultimately, he can’t really convince her to change. It’s something she’ll have to want for herself. But what he can do is protect himself from her, making it impossible for her to hurt him.

It’s sort of up to you if you would like to love her. If you watch this movie and she, you know, frustrates you, that is totally fair. I want that to be a big part of who she is.

[From the AV Club interview]

So here are a few things I want to shed light on.

It’s very interesting that Rebecca intended Spinel to be read as “a toxic person” because so many fans fell in love with her, said they’d be her friend, hated intensely on Pink Diamond because of what she did to abandon the poor Gem, and sympathized with her directly. But Rebecca was looking at Spinel from Steven’s perspective. And that’s also what I did.

I’ve been Steven. I have VERY much been Steven.

When you meet someone who was done dirty, when you recognize the horror they’ve been through, when you see how much pain they are in and agree they have the right to be angry, it’s natural for empathetic people to offer themselves as comfort.

But when you’re Steven, you also know it isn’t YOUR fault either. Before you have the ability and experience to set boundaries, you can get sucked into other people’s stormy waters and think you’re helping if you drown in solidarity with them. What’s really important to preserving yourself is learning that you can stand on the boat and toss a life preserver. That it doesn’t ACTUALLY HELP to jump in the water and sink with them.

Some folks are angry that Steven didn’t jump right into sacrifice himself on the altar of friendship in the service of an intense, literally murderous stranger who tried to poison him and his planet and lash out at his friends, robbing them of their rich pasts and their relationships because all of it hurt HER so much. It is SO easy to understand WHY SPINEL WAS ANGRY. But nothing she was doing to Steven, his friends, or the Earth was going to fix her problems, and furthermore, she FULLY UNDERSTOOD that it was NOT THE FAULT of any of the people she took her anger out on. It was irrational, yes, and that is part of her dysfunction. But also, in these situations, what helps explain it still does not excuse it.

Some have railed at Steven saying he somehow forgave genocidal tyrants like the Diamonds but couldn’t be friends with a damaged Gem like Spinel who just wanted friendship. The big difference there is that Steven got involved with the Diamonds when both parties believed he was a different person. The Diamonds believed he was the lost Pink Diamond, and Steven has also spent much of his superhero life believing he WAS his mother and was therefore obligated to accept punishment for her crimes or to clean up the messes she made. Now that he knows he is not her and that she did some pretty horrible stuff, he also wants the right to stop feeling responsible for every person Pink hurt in the entire region of space.

Steven gave Spinel basically compassionate treatment. He did not abuse her. He did not insult her. He occasionally coddled her when it seemed important (and though some said he was too businesslike while he pursued his mission, he was literally looking at the world ending within two days if he didn’t solve the problem). And most importantly . . . .

He let her leave the garden.

Spinel stayed in the garden all those millennia because Pink Diamond told her they were playing a game. All that time, she had visions of Pink returning so she could see her smile, hear her laughter. We see a sequence where she tried to follow Pink out of the garden and Pink manipulated her into staying willingly. We watch those feet leaving and one pair of feet staying behind. We see Pink disappear.

When Steven goes to leave the garden, Spinel follows in the same manner. Some have criticized him for letting go of her hands.

But he invited her out of the garden. He didn’t say stay. He said come with me.

As he sang about her deserving someone better, he was sincere. But he did not say the person to make her feel found should be him. He did not want to take on another person with thousands of years of baggage who would require a specific brand of attention and so much tenderness to avoid snapping. He did not allow her to be held by the hand and led out. He recognized that she needed encouragement to leave this place because of what was done to her, but he wanted her to take the steps.

Compassionate people are crushed all the time under the weight of needy people who make it hurt to love. People like Steven can acknowledge that Spinel deserves love and deserves to be happy without accepting that it’s heartless to stop short of personally doing it. Especially when you literally have to take physical, mental, and emotional damage as a general consequence of offering support and counseling. It is sometimes just beyond what you can do.

I made the mistake several times of getting very close to someone who treated me poorly while taking comfort in my presence. I cared that they were hurt and I didn’t know how to say “You deserve love” without stepping in and loving them. In EVERY case I was involved with, the person went from initially grateful to “why don’t you help me more?” shockingly quickly, and two of them deliberately tried to create situations where I would be trapped with them and isolated from others.

I could get very personal here but I don’t think I need to. Those of us who relate all too well to Steven wanting to help others will have been in this situation. Your heart hurts for people who live with pain that has never touched you, but when they’ve made it clear with one of their first actions that they feel satisfied at the idea of ruining your life, trusting them could mean the end of you. Especially if they demand that you risk life and limb to fix and save them before you’d dare to call it love, and especially if they want to be fixed without feeling responsible for initiating any of it. Some people mistake suffering for working hard toward a goal. Both can hurt but only one is constructive. If I’m expected to spend extensive resources on someone, I need some partnership in the goal, and I can’t accomplish that with someone whose wish for companionship manifests as “I want you to feel as bad as I do, and will take steps to hurt you so I have someone to cry with.”

Steven risked his actual life while he didn’t have powers so he could go talk to Spinel, and he wouldn’t fight her when she wanted to fight. He protected himself while she spent her anger. He STILL put himself in the line of fire far more than a less compassionate person would. He took time and tenderness to listen to her story and sympathize with her, tell her she deserved better, bear witness to what she’d become after being treated like a discarded plaything, and bring her hope with promises of a new future and a way to feel found.

Sadly, Spinel flipped back to being murderous at the first sign that Steven might be about to prioritize someone other than her, reframing his reasonable needs as if he was planning to abandon her, isolate her, discard her. This was a trauma reaction, yes, and she isn’t entirely to blame for being upset because she was worried she was just being used and none of her actions were logically thought through.

But does someone ever “deserve” the friendship of a specific person who can’t feel warm toward them because of their OWN bad experiences?

No!

Steven has a big heart but he has his very own huge storehouse of trauma, and being physically attacked with his family and planet put in danger over the actions of his mother is at the top of the list. Instead of assuming that the person who has trauma the loudest is the most hurt, can’t we just acknowledge that Spinel’s and Steven’s respective traumas make them NOT the best match for friendship?

The ending of the movie, with Spinel going off with the Diamonds, might seem a little disturbing with all the codepencency floating around there, but if you want to talk about compassion, I think this is a good place for Spinel to start.

She just wanted to make Pink Diamond laugh and enjoy her life. She longed to do that for so long and then it all ended when she found out she would NEVER GET TO DO IT. I think bonding with the other Diamonds and having a familiar, safe place to experience the kind of love she’s used to will be a good FOUNDATION for building herself into a person beyond that. For now, she needs comfort. I hope they treat her well.

#steven universe #steven universe the movie #gif #long post #spinel #su analysis #my su analysis #myblog

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princessbunnyblossom · 4 years ago

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First and Last of her Kind Ch 3 Escaping the Garden

Spinel quickly hid behind a half crumbled pillar, she didn’t under and but something inside her didn’t want to be seen like this. All dirty and unkept. Something about this didn’t bode well for the small pink gem. Spinel kept quiet as she listened to the two gems speak.

“So we’re here for a spinel?” One of the topazes asked..

The other nodded.

“Yeah it was said that Pink Diamond had a special gem made just for her in this garden.”

The Amethyst spoke up.

“Really? I thought those were just silly rumors told by the aquamarines.” The purple gem said.

The first topaz shook her head.

“No it’s true, the diamonds made a special gem made with the most specific ingredients for her.” They replied.

“Sounds pretty neat.” The amethyst said.

“Yes, she's also said to be a rare gem too, the only spinel ever to be crested.” The second topaz said.

“Seriously and she lives in this dump?” The amethyst guard said gesturing to the dead garden,.

Spinel winced at the mention of how deplorable the garden was, yet the small gem was finding herself to be blushing a soft red hue at the assumption that she was rare.

She wasn’t that rare? Was she?

Spinel listened closely to what the three gems were saying.

“Rumor has it that this gem has remained in this garden for all her existence.” The first topaz said.

Okay that was both true and not true. Spinel has been out in Homeworld….well sorta. It was one time…..and it wasn’t that long….but still she had been out of the garden.

“Kinda sad that she was left all alone and kept in this dark about what happened to her diamond.” The amethyst said cal,lay.

Spinel swallowed a painful lump in her throat, were they mentioning of her giving up her form and leaving Spinel on her own account while she live a whole other life and made friends on her own without her. Spinel swallowed hard, she didn’t want to think about that right now and no she wasn’t in the dark. At least not anymore.

“Well we need to find her, Pink Diamond’s son wants to see her. Something about getting her old belongings and things since he’s the new pink diamond now.” The amethyst said.

Spinel stood there frozen. She would belong to him.

Steven Universe.

Spinel froze, body going rigid and felt her breaths being caught in her throat. Her mind went blank for a second and once it rebooted she shook and trembled as few gripped her form. No. She didn’t want to go with him, she did not want to be with the new pink diamond. Spinel shuttered and the small pink gem watched with scared Cotton candy pink eyes as the three gems began spreading out looking for her. Spinel needed to leave, she couldn’t stay here. Maybe she could hide and wait it out.

Spinel gasped as one of the gems were getting closer to where she was. What was Pink Diamond’s son going to do to her when he got his hands on her? Spinel trembled, not wanting to think about it let alone went to find out. The small gem could hear those nasty voices in her head saying terrible things about her and her unfortunate situation.

‘When they do find you your as good as shattered.’ ‘That diamond won’t want a broken toy like you.’ ‘If you couldn’t keep your diamond happy what makes you think you can keep the new pink diamond happy?’ Her mind hissed.

Spinel shook, she needed to leave. Could she really leave though this was her garden this was once her home. However did she really want to stay here in the dark and rotting garden all alone to waste away. Did he really want that? To remain in the dark colorless garden with nothing but her awful thoughts that could consume her? Spinel whimpered sniffing softly, remembering now only the bad times she had here it was getting so hard to see the good times as her most terrible and darkest days were spent in this garden. No, she didn’t want to stay here anymore the awful rotting smell the horrible darkness and the feelings of loneliness and despair radiated off of this place. This place was far too gone and now the memories were tainted and ruined by the one person she thought loved her.

Did Pink even care about their friendship? Did she ever care about Spinel at all? That would explain the terrible abuse she got when Pink was in one of her moods. The hair pulling the verbal and cruel words and the beatings. Sweet stars the painful beatings she would get when her diamond was angry with her. Painful blue and purple bruises would litter her small body and she would be limping for a couple of days. But Pink did that only because she loved her. That’s what she said. What had she done to deserve this though? The tiny pink gem peeled out of her hiding spot and stared at the gems who were looking for her. Luckily they were too far away to see her.

However the young gem’s eyes wandered over to the warp pad as it went off and someone else appeared standing tall and strong. They worse a long pink cloak that draped against the ground and the tiny pink gem knew that gems of high estate wore capes; her diamond had told her that when she saw a jasper wearing one. Spinel could barely make out their fave as it was covered partially by the cloak that they were wearing. The small pink gem stared out and it didn’t take long for her to realize from the embroidery and embellishments on the cloak that the individual was a high ranking gem. That’s when she spotted the three gems stopping what they were doing and did the salute….oh sweet merciful stars that was-

“My diamond.” The three gems said in union.

The cloaked diamond lifted his hands dismissing them and stared at them.

“Where is flaucet cut 001 AA?” He said in a rather calm yet form voice.

“My diamond we are still looking for her.” The amethyst said bowing to the higher authority diamond.

The cloaked diamond seemed unhappy but this.

“This garden isn’t that big, you couldn’t have possibly lost her.” He stated firmly.

“Yes my diamond, we’ll keep searching for her..” One of the topazes said.

“See to it that you do.” The cloaked diamond stayed coldly.

The diamond stood there watching as the three gems hurried to find the pink gem and Spinelmshook and shuttered. What was he going to do to her when he found her? Spinel trembled she needed to- Oh ho. He was beginning to walk around and joined in on the search for the supposed “missing gem.” It would only be a matter of time before they eventually find her. Spinel sucked in a breath and stepped out from where she was hiding once he had turned away from where she was hiding. The small pink gem took the opportunity to run and hide in a different area of the garden, Spinel used her elasticity to her advantage and proceeded to hide behind one of the dying trees of the garden.. . The small gem looked at the tree the leaves had long gone and died and the bark of the red was peeling away easily like dead skin.

The small gem could see that all the gems were spreading out looking for her but that was fine side she was close to the huge staircase near the warp pad. In all her existence Spinel had never thought that she would leave the garden, this had once become her home her paradise where she and her diamond could play for hours on end it had been the first place she had ever seen when she emerged but now, now it was nothing more than her personal hell . A painful reminder that Pink Diamond, someone who she dearly loved, had left her...had abandoned her. Left her to rot for six thousand years. Spinel could feel tears burn and swell in her eyes, had she truly been a horrible best friend to deserve such a cruel fate? Or maybe she was just unworthy of love and affection.

Spinel sniffed pitifully and gasped when she saw the cloaked diamond snap his head and turned to her direction, but as quick as a bullet Spinel retracted back into her hiding spot. She could practically hear her own heartbeat ringing in gin her non existent ears. Spinel watched as the amethyst guard called for her diamond.

“My diamond it seems the gem you might be looking for might still in fact be here.” The purple gem informed.

“How so?” Came a calm toned voice.

Spinel watched as the amethyst paused for a moment but cleared her throat to continue speaking.

“Well my diamond based on some of the evidence over here by the vines being ripped I’d say she moved recently from this spot. The footprints indicated that she might have moved somewhere over ther, the amethyst said.

Spinel didn’t waste any time as she quickly ran out of her spot where she was hidden and ran straight towards the pink stairs that lead to the warppad. However the universe wasn’t on her side of the moment and the small gem stepped on a dead twig lying in the ground. The snapping sound the dead wood had caused immediately gave away her location. Spinel froze and saw the three gems and diamond all state at her from afar. They all just stared and everything felt so cold and tense. Spinel at this point didn’t like the pairs of eyes that were on her now yet she enjoyed it when she was entertaining her diamond but now it just felt wrong.

The small pink gem felt her breath hitch and quickly bolted up the stunts she didn’t even stop when she hewed the amethyst shout.

“Hey!”

The pink gem didn’t stop, didn’t turn around, she no longer wished to stay in the rotting garden. It was driving her mad. The garden was no longer friendly and welcoming like it once was. There was only a disturbing dark energy lingering and embedding itself in the soils. It was now colorless and dying sending chills down anyone who dare venture alone in its dark depths. Spinel could hear the heavy footsteps of the topaz guards coming after her and his only furthered the small gem to run faster and when she finally reached the warp pad Spinel turned around to see that the cloaked diamond .had jumped into the air and was now flying towards her at such a speed. She could see his bright pink diamond eyes and she did not like it one bit. They looked…...looked way too much like her own diamond’s eyes. It unsettled Spinel. She felt her body go cold when she saw them and felt herself unable to move but luck have it that she snapped out of her daze and helped in fear as but before he could manage to catch her the warp pad activated and the small pink gem was swallowed up by a bright blue light before being sent to a completely different part of Homeworld.

#steven universe #spinel steven universe #Stevnel #diamond steven

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fanfoolishness · 5 years ago

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In Dreams commentary

SPOILERS AHOY HOY!

IN DREAMS:

Star Eyes Steven <3

He’s so happy to see them all

I love how happy Lars is!

Zach is fucking killing it with that squeeing!

COOKIE CAT, I NEVER THOUGHT YOU WOULD BE EVIL!

Connie has sick dance moves

So does Onion, strangely????

Then again he IS Sour Cream’s little brother

he’s been raving since in utero

Zach also killing it with the panic and the gasping upon waking up

My heaaaart

Why do I keep having these horrible dreams?

So as I suspected Steven has been having problems sleeping for a while now

I suspect it’s been a problem since Bluebird (bad Gem invading his house) and A Very Special Episode (overbooking his schedule, continuing into Snow Day and those suggestive cups of tea on the bookshelf)

I STILL FUCKING LOVE PERIDOT SO MUCH

I also love that Steven is still a little shit when he wants to be I love him so much

“You know, I’m so glad you’re here. I’ve been having some weird dreams lately and --”

Oh Steven! I’m so proud of you! You’re actually trying to reach out instead of stuffing it all inside!!!

Peridot, you kinda fucked it up

awww he was trying!!!

Also oh shit Peridot called him a monster??? don’t be foreshadowing plz omg

YAY THEY’RE SO EXCITED

and then just like me and X-Files season 10 and 11 they were fucked over ;_;

THEIR RAGE IS SOOOOOO REAL I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

man oh man oh man I really need to find a good Peridot voice and write her and Steven together because their friendship is the BEST

Peri: Camp Pining Hearts helped me escape when everything around me was in chaos

shit Peridot you don’t have to call me out about Steven Universe okay

MY SON

“I have to start wearing a tinfoil hat?”

fucking GOLD

“Might be fun to fix something that isn’t the entire universe!’

STEVEN YOU RIDICULOUS CREATURE JUST LET THE WORLD BE SOMETIMES, YOU DON’T HAVE TO FIX IT ALL, IT ISN’T ALL UP TO YOUUUUUUU

also note: remind myself of this as it KEEPS FUCKING COMING UP IN THERAPY damn

no wonder I identify so hard with this little meatball

SILENT BEEKEEPER IS IN THE BIGFOOT POSE I CAN’T

I fucking LOST it about the poutine allergy

Like, rolled over and was laughing myself to death

STEFAN??? REALLY??????

STEVEN YOU’RE DRAWING AGAIN!!!!

I’M SO HAPPY

but you dumb shit why did you make someone who helps other people

now you need to play some music!

Chili before bed? This is such a dumbass idea

STAR PILLOW I CAN’T

Jazmin is a birder? I love it

Please tell Zach voices Stefan

Does Stefan count as Steven with stubble for my bingo card?

Uhhhh Stefan is kinda sexy af

Blue Diamond dolphin and Yellow PInap and White heels aaaaah

PINK STEVEN OH NO NOT AGAIN!!!

You fell asleep and you started glowing pink!!! This happens regularly? Every time he’s sleeping now???????

This is such a good pensive Steeb

I’m so happy that crying Stefan is used for humor, I can’t even

GEMCOPTERS

So I see you’re sleeping great Steven

ooooh Spinel’s injector! first concrete reference we’ve had to the movie, isn’t it?

Nice to have the injector call back to baby Steven, since he was hit with the rejuvenator

Steven blushes at the idea of Stefan kissing Jazmin. Worried that Connie won’t like you, are we?????

I know how you feel, Steven. At your age I was both totally enamored of the idea of kissing boys and also FUCKING TERRIFIED DON’T WANNA DO IT NOPE NOPE NOPE

“I can’t do Rodrigo dirty like that!” fucking dead

Peridot’s hand on the doorknob -- Steven it’s okay! she can come back!!!

Is Rodrigo voiced by J-10? because that would be a delight

MAD CONNIE! Is she mad because Stefan isn’t helping someone??? or mad because she’s going to be kissed???

CONNIE OBSIDIAN????????

because Obsidian saved Connie’s life?

is he scared of Obsidian’s power?

frightened of how difficult it was to be her?

scared of the circumstances in which she formed?

SO MANY POSSIBILITIES

I don’t think anyone called that that shot of Steven was going to be him squished by Connsidian’s foot

oh no oh no oh no he’s in his old room

head in his hands

oh Steven ;_;

A Cookie Cat poster is above the TV in this scene... hmmm

Staticdot is scary!

I’m so tired....

STEVEN stop killing me!!!!

I’m sorry I can’t do this for you --

I can’t

I can’t, he woke up crying, I CAN’T

Peridot -- hug him!!! yay!!! friends!!!!!!!! I love them sooooo much

omfg people are killing each other on CPH???

How many times does Steven have tears in his eyes in this episode?

Okay this got way too fucking long to include Bismuth. Separate post time!!!

#suf spoilers #su spoilers #steven universe future spoilers #steven universe spoilers #spoilers #steven universe #steven universe future #in dreams #in dreams suf

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spins-ter · 5 years ago

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Hi’ya! Long time no fic? This one’s gonna have multiple parts, dunno how many. This first bit is really just a bunch of fluff to build up the next part; soft, warm moments that make me feel fuzzy thinking about. I hope it has the same affect on you? ‘Nough rambling, here’s the fic!

~-♡-♡-~

Best Friends Forgotten

Spinel x Quartz Reader - Word Count: 1,790

[Y/N] = Your Name (Gem name), [Y/NN] = Your Nickname

~-♡-♡-~

You were just a quartz soldier, and not a very important one. The only reason you were in Pink Diamond’s garden was because you had been ordered by her to keep it managed while she was gone. Whatever. It was easy work, just keep the plants alive and make sure nothing becomes overgrown. In fact, it was too easy. The days slowly became monotonous. Trim this plant, water the next. You would try to talk to her Spinel, but she just stood in place and hummed a basic response.

You were moving around the garden, just preparing what you would need to care for the garden and the structures inside it.

“How are you doing?”

“Fine.”

You were tending to the plants, and there were a lot. Your eyes moved to the stationary Gem, longing for help.

“Do you want to help me?”

“Can’t.”

You were lazing around, bored out of your mind.

“I know a good game, wanna play?”

“Already in one.” You huffed, not understanding how she could just stand there.

“Aren’t you bored?”

The Gem just fidgeted in response.

~-♡-♡-~

You eventually got her to look at you when you spoke and give you more than a none to three word answer. She seemed to appreciate the company, growing more and more tired of the game she found herself stuck in as centuries passed. And for you, it felt comforting to finally have someone to hold a conversation with. You were tending to the flowers as a thought crossed your mind.

“Do you have a favorite flower?”

“The blue ones.” Spinel hummed in thought.

“The cornflowers?" You hummed back. "You’re gonna have to be more specific, dear.”

“No, the ones with five petals.” She paused as you just stared at her in confusion. “Here uh.” She stretched an arm, not wanting to move from her spot yet, and pointed to a patch of forget-me-nots. “These ones.”

“Ah, I see. They are lovely.” You fight back any second-hand pain from the irony.

“Yeah.” Spinel hums a tune. You keep note of her words.

~-♡-♡-~

Around the 2,000 year mark, you finally got Spinel to move from her spot. She was very wary, but you convinced her that Pink Diamond would be fine with her taking a break from the game. In truth, you had accepted that Pink would never return. 2,000 years with no word? There was no chance she was coming back.

~-♡-♡-~

You hummed patiently as the pink Gem made her way to you. She was slow and moved a bit stiffly, due to still wanting to stay stationary and it having been two millennia since she had last moved.

“Come on Spinsy, it’s fine. You can help me take care of the forget-me-nots. They are your favorite, right?”

“Yeah,” she croaked cautiously, “it’s just been a long while.”

Eventually, she got by you and sat down, giving a small sigh.

“There ya are. Feels good to move, don’t it?” You purred and plucked a few flowers from the patch. She giggled lightly as you placed them in her heart-shaped buns.

“Yeah, it does. Now, how d’ya care fer them?” You could feel a strange emotion swell in you as she tilted her head to the side with curiosity.

“Well, I’m going to clip off any dead flowers. You can water them, yeah?” Spinel squinted her eyes a bit in response.

“Yeah, I think I’ve seen’ya do that…” She looked away, humming in thought.

“Here, I’ll demonstrate.” You held Spinel’s hand and she followed you as you went to get water.

“There,” you huffed, handing the now filled watering can over to Spinel, “now that it’s filled, we can go back and you can water them.” Spinel’s eyes glistened with excitement and the strange emotion panged through you again at the sight.

You showed Spinel how to water the forget-me-nots when you made it back to the patch and failed to stifle a purr when you paused to watch her. It was kind of like a game to her, and she enjoyed the activity.

Spinel opted to help you with the rest of the flowers, and you were thankful for it. It gave her something to do and lightened your workload. When the two of you were finished, you looked at her warmly.

“Hey, if you want to play a game, we can. You can even choose.” Spinel gave you a shocked yet joyful look and you instinctively smiled at the sight.

“Really?”

“Yes, really.” You didn’t remove your soft gaze from the ecstatic Gem. “You were a lot of help. Only fair I let you choose something fun that you want to do.” Spinel giggled in response.

“Okay!” She jumped up and ran a bit back before stretching an arm to tap you. “Tag! You’re it!”

~-♡-♡-~

You wanted to leave to get word of what was happening, why Pink Diamond had just ditched, but you never did. You didn’t want to leave Spinel alone. You had grown fond of her and knew your presence was keeping her happy. Once she had started moving around the garden, you tried talking her into leaving with you, but she never wanted to. So the two of you would be stuck there until some form of news reached you.

~-♡-♡-~

As time went on, you noticed the dust and dirt accumulate on Spinel, and you ached at seeing the neglect reflect on her appearance. Her heart buns slowly became unkempt and her appearance slowly dulled. In response, you wetted a cloth you used to wipe down statues and called Spinel over. She was taking care of some flowers, and hummed when she got up to you.

“Yeah, [Y/N]?” The Gem smiled as she responded, as she always did when around you.

“I… uh…” You stuttered, suddenly embarrassed by what you were going to do. You closed your eyes and huffed to calm down. “You’re lookin’ a bit dirty so I… I’m gonna wash you off, okay?” The confused look Spinel had gave you melted into a warm smile.

“Oh, okay!” Spinel knelt in front of you. You sighed, glad she seemingly didn’t understand why this would embarrass you. You understood that gems could be sensitive, having one yourself of course, so you decided to start with hers to get it out of the way.

“Alright, this might feel weird.” Spinel tilted her head slightly at your words, but gasped when the cloth touched her gem. You paused, fearful of her reaction, but she just stared at you. You slowly began to rub the dirt off her gem, making sure she was comfortable. Spinel leaned into the contact, and you could feel her arms slowly wrap around your waist as she rested her head in the crook of your neck.

“Mmmnnmm…” The Gem purred and you smiled, once again feeling a strange emotion pang in your gem. You rested your head on top of hers as you slightly zoned out, rubbing the cloth in circles on Spinel’s gem. When you zoned back in, she was still clung to you and humming. It was as if she was unconscious, and she barely even reacted when you shifted.

“Hey sweetie,” you purred softly to her, “can you get up, I still gotta wipe the rest’a you down.” Spinel twitched slightly in response and slowly lifted her head to look you in the eyes.

“Hmm..?” A drop of drool rolled down her chin and her eyes were squinted. You giggle silently, the Gem looked so ridiculous that it was adorable. She hums as you wipe her face.

“I’m gonna need you to get up so I can wipe you down.” Spinel nodded and unwrapped you. Leaning forward, you placed a brief kiss on her head. You saw her completely flushed face as you pulled away, giving another soft giggle as you begin to wipe her, beginning with her neck. She was clean and you were starting to comb through her buns with your fingers to put stray strands back in place when she spoke to you.

“Hey, promise not to tell Pink this, okay?” You paused as Spinel spoke to you.

“You got my word, sweets.” You purred your response, and the pink Gem fidgeted slightly.

“I may’ve been made for Pink,” she began, her voice low with embarrassment, “but you’re my true best friend.” You stroked her hair in response.

“‘N you’re mine, as well.” Spinel beamed at your response. “Now let me fix your hair. Whad’ya want to do when I’m done?” Spinel paused for a moment.

“Can’ya hold me? Kinda like earlier?” You smile warmly.

“Of course.”

~-♡-♡-~

It had been roughly 5,000 years since Pink had left at this point. You had long since accepted that she would never return, though Spinel still held a small hope that she would return. Until then, you kept her company. And with every passing day, Spinel became more attached to you. Much more than she would ever want to admit. She would spend most of her time by your side, offering to help with any task, playing a game with you, or asking for physical contact. It would be a lie to say you weren’t charmed by it.

And you had finally found a word for the pang of wonderful emotion that throbbed in your gem when you saw Spinel happy. It was love. And there you were, sat down and holding Spinel as she rested on you. The sharp throb of love radiating throughout your whole being. Although you had gotten used to the feeling, it was still nearly unbearable. You hummed and rubbed shapes into her back, allowing yourself to doze off as well. The feeling was peaceful, moments like this had become you two’s favorite. You were brought out of your thoughts as you felt Spinel shift.

“Hey Spinsy?” You slurred on impulse. It took a few moments before the Gem replied.

“Yeah, [Y/NN]?” She purred, not moving from her place in your lap.

“I love you.” Spinel stayed silent and you panicked as you felt her shudder. You were about to apologize when you realized she had pushed her face into the crook of your neck and you could feel her smiling. Even before you heard her hum, you could tell what she was about to say.

“I love you too.” She wrapped her arms around you as she spoke and you pulled her in closer. You shifted to lay on your back and let yourself doze off again. The feeling of overwhelming bliss you got from her words was intoxicating. You leaned your head over to give her a few kisses on hers, and found yourself drift into unconsciousness soon after.

#spinel x reader #reader x spinel #self shipping #self insert #y/n #spinel imagines #reader insert #x reader #spinel #spinel fanfic

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princessbunnyblossom · 4 years ago

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First and Last of her kind Ch 1 The game in the garden

Hey everyone before you read aid like to point out in this AU fusions are one being. Meaning that two gems didn’t need to do a fusion dance in order to make a fusion it’s just a one being. However gems cam still do fusion dances and create more fusions of their one its just some fusions are one being, I’ve been wanting to make something like this but I wasn’t sure how I’d go about it. Sorry if this doesn’t explain much you can ask me some things in the comments below and be sure to put down a comment of the story. :3 please enjoy.

Thousands of light years away laid an asteroid in the middle of space and there from that asteroid lay a garden rotting and in ruin. It had once held such glorious beauty, blooming beautiful flowers and organic life. However that was years ago and now the unfortunate garden was left to waste away in decay. The in the rotting garden stood a small pink gem standing so perfectly still hands clasped together and a smile that was beginning to fade from her soft features. Yet she stood there waiting patiently for her diamond.

Pink Diamond.

Before leaving the garden to go to earth, which Spinel desperately wanted to go with. The small gem remembers clinging to Pink Diamond’s arms wanting her to stay a little longer and play a little more. Spinel at that time couldn't see the annoyed look on her diamond ‘s face. The flash of annoyance was gone as soon as it came, Pink Diamond kneed down to eye level with the pink heart shaped gem and told her that they could play one more game before she had to leave. Pink had told the small naive little gem to stand still and wait. A waiting game.

“Now remember Spinel. Stand very still.” Pink Diamond said booping Spinel on her nose.

“This'll be so much fun.” Chimed the innocent pink gem not knowing the true horrors and psychological damage she would face in her game.

Spinel watched as her beloved diamond walked off not even looking back not even once, it stung a little but the small pink gem brushed it off as her diamond would come back for her and they could play all sorts of games in her new colony. So Spinel waited and waited, night after night all alone in the garden. Spinel normally didn't like being alone but she tried to focus on winning the game her diamond made up. So the small pink gem smiled brightly looking up at the warp,pad.

She wanted to make her diamond proud. Spinel had lately been causing Pink to become upset with her which caused her diamond to have to ‘punish’ her. Like pulling her hair, kicking, slapping, pinching, whipping or beating her. Calling her really mean names. Throwing her against pillars and threatening to shatter her if she didn't behave. Humiliating her in front of other gems and threatening to break up their friendship. Spinel sniffed trying hard not to think about those horrible memories and blinking away tears. She swallowed a painful lump and tried to keep a happy face.

She was just being a naughty gem and it was normal for her diamond to put herein her place when she was acting out. It was because Spinel was being a very bad girl. So she must deserve those things….right?

…..right?

However the game she and Pink were playing began to last a pretty long time and yet Spinel was determined to win no matter how long it took.

Oh if only she knew.

The game was pretty boring Spinel had to admit and the more days passed on Spinel had taken up on star gazing to try and pass the time. It was so beautiful, the night sky full of so many stars, they looked to be smiling down on the small pink gem waiting in the garden. Pink doll like eyes stared up at the glittering stars that shined bright above her. The small heart shaped gem began counting some of them smiling as she did so. Spinel after some time of counting stars signed wondering how long it had truly been . Spinel looked around the garden again. Had the flowers always looked so….sad.

Spinel’s eyes gazed at a couple of golden flowers that looked to be withered, the small gem fought the urge to move and tend to them and felt a small knot form in her stomach.. Something about this game didn't…..didn't feel right. Spinel shook her head trying to bury all those weird feelings she was feeling. Her diamond would eventually come for her. She was playing this game right.

Wasn't she?

Spinel had to be doing this right. Spinel looked away from the warp pad and up at the stars again. She just needed to be patient that's all. So as hours turned to days and days into weeks which turned into months Spinel could see that the garden was changing. Not right away but slowly.

Slow and painful.

It started with a couple of flowers that withered and Spinel tried her best to not pay attention but then more and more flows began dying off and Sponel began to get nervous and the poor pink gem began feeling a pit of helplessness. When her favorite flowers, the beautiful blue forget-me-nots , withered away and died off, it was the very first time in a long time Spunel cried. She wept sorrowful tears of sadness at the uncork ate loss of her favorite flowers.

Little did Spinel know that there would be many incidents that she would shed more painful and bitter tears. Spinel sniffed and found herself unable to rub and wipe them away. She could only allow them to stream down her cheeks and drip down her chin.

Spinel sniffed as a few hiccups came out of her. She loved those flowers and it was a terrible shame to see them leave and wither and die. Spinel hadn't felt this sad since Pink had…...had. Spinel’s face scrunched up in pain and sorrow as she didn't want to think about ‘that’ memory. The thought made Spinel psychically ill. The nasty, dirty feeling. The tainting, the cold,floor. Spinel didn't want to think about it. The thought alone made Spinel begin to cry all over again.

Something about crying and having no one to wipe them up made the poor gem feel even more alone. It was just the unable ability to while her wet eyes made her want to cry even more. She was all alone. Absolutely no one was here and she was thousands of light years from Homeworld. Spinel really wanted to play this game with her diamond but...it was terribly lonely and dreadfully boring. Spinel only hoped that her beloved best friend would return safely. Spinel missed her. Sponel loved her. So the small gem waited.

...And waited

….And waited

….And waited.

Spinel looked around the garden which was terribly unkept and slowly becoming more and more dead. Spinel swallowed a painful lump in her throat, when Pink Diamond returned Spinel could tend to the garden and make it all pretty again. The sweet thought seemed to ease the tiny pink gem.

She just needed to wait a little longer.

Her diamond would come soon and say that she had won the game and Pink Diamond would tell her that she was a good gem, scooping her up into her arms and finally taking her to earth. Spinel smiled wistfully at that thought and stared up at the warp,pad. That's when the small gem noticed that there were more stars out than usual. More stars than she had counted before.

How much time had passed?

Spinel shoved her questions aside and smiled beginning to count the newly found stars she was given. Jerez there were so many stars but luckily Spinel was a good counter and managed to count all of them she could see. It was a good distraction but that's when the garden began to descend down into darkness.

Spinel’s legs hurt from standing so long, she wasn't used to standing this still for long periods of time. She was meant to run, jump and play.

Not this.

This was a game...so it should be fun right?

Spinel looked at the warp pad…..again.

If this was a game, why wasn't she having fun? Or at least she thought she wasn't having fun. Spinel sighed, she just needed to wait was all, maybe she wasn’t seeing the true nature to this game. The small pink gem kept her eyes closed but listened as there came a crumbling sound not too far from her. The noise had snapped her out of herd and the small gem turned to see that one of the pillars had crumbled to the ground from where it had once proudly stood.

Spinel had yelped our in fear when she saw it happen as the loud noise echoed against the glass dome of the garden. Spinel stared at the pillars around her some managed to remain while most were in shambles with vines weaving between their cracks and broken pieces. It was sad but Spinel tried to not think about them, maybe they could get a bismuth gem to fix up. Spinel winced in pain again. Her legs hurt for sure but her feet were absolutely killing her. Spinel glanced down with her eyes and gasped when she saw that vines had entangled her ankles and feet keeping her in place. There were sharp thorn growing on them which would explain the uncomfortable pain she was feeling.

How?....how did these get here?! How long was she standing still for?! Spinel swallowed a painful lump as she looked on at the overgrown and dying garden. What could possibly be taking her diamond so long? The small pink gem looked up at the sky again, there were so many pretty stars out, many, many more. Where did all the time go?

Did time even excise?

Spinel could feel her heart sink a little. The small gem tried to convince herself that it was just a coincidence and her diamond was just running a little late that was all. Pink Diamond would come fro her soon. She was her best friend after all. She cared about Spinel.

….right?

Spinel could feel her stomach twist and turn. What if...what if her diamond wasn’t coming back? Spinel didn’t like that thought and decided to not think about it too much. She was her diamind’s playmate, her best friend. She had to come back….right? Spinel could feel tears bubble up in the corners of her eyes, she began to doubt herself and it didn’t feel good.

‘Why isn’t she back yet?’ ‘Is she still colonizing earth?’ ‘Am I doing this right?’

Spinel’s mind began to spiral.

‘What I’d I’m not doing this right!’

Spinel bit her lip and shuttered. She didn’t like to think that she had been playing wrong the entire time. That made her stomach hurt more and then there came a sharp pang in her chest that made her wince in discomfort.

What was she doing wrong?

Spinel gasped softly a thought came about, was it because she was looking up at the stars? Instead of the warp pad. The small pink gem bit her lip and kept her eyes fixated on the transportation device instead of gazing at the stars. There were so many of them now she didn’t think she could keep count. Besides once Pink returned they could count as many as they liked. So the small gem in the rotting garden waited….and waited.

Spunel’s back and legs were aching so bad right now, she desperately wanted to stretch or take a break from standing. Spinel’s ankles and feet wer3 so sore she didn’t think she could stand any longer. The vines were entangled and wrapped around the young gem’s legs and they felt as if they were beginning to embed themselves into her feet. It hurt….it hurt a lot. Spinel tried to look on the bright side. Her diamond would come for her her diamond would bring her back to earth and-

‘Stop. She isn’t coming for you.’ Spinel gasped she didn’t like that voice, it cold, and unforgiving. The small pink gems sniffed.

‘She doesn’t want to play with you anymore.’ Her mind hissed.

Spinel bit her lip she didn’t want to think about any of that. It hurt to think about the bad thoughts. She didn’t like it. Pink was coming Spinel just had to wait a little longer. Spinel could feel another wave of tears on-flowing in her eyes but tried her best to hold them back. Spinel didn’t want to cry but knew that was easier said than done. Spinel began blinking away tears and swallowed a painful lump in her throat. She didn’t want to hear that scary and cold voice in the back of her head anymore but hadn’t known that it was only the beginning. That voice would continue on talking to her whether she liked it or not.

Spinel just needed to wait.

How long had Pink Diamond leave? Spinel tried to remember, it must’ve been awhile ago bu5 now the garden truly was overgrown and was slowly rotting away. It was horrible to watch as the one place she come to love was being destroyed right in front of her. Spinel wept pitifully as she stared at the garden which lay in ruin. Even the pond was changing; the once clean and clear water was now a nasty green-black looking goo. Spinel hadn’t realized that her own appearance had changed too.

Her hair was messy and tangled, her appearance was dirty and unkept and her gem was dull and had lost its shine it had once had; years of grime had caused it to lose its glorious gleam. It would be alright Spinel tried to reassure herself. Surely her diamond would understand why she looked the way she did and get all cleaned up and have a good laugh. It would be alright.

Right?

Spinel sniffed staring at the warp,pad and then she saw it go off a blue flash cake from the transportation device and Spinel was so close to running off towards it to tell Pink that she was sorry that the garden looked so a mess but….there was nobody there….absolutely no one. Maybe the warp pad was broken? Yes that had to be it. Spinel sighed and continued playing the unfortunate game. To think she was so close to winning that she almost was about to run and lose cause she thought she saw Pink. How silly of her. She decided to brush it off however that’s when she began hearing something...it was a voice. But it wasn’t inside her head this time. It was.,,here...in the garden.

It was her diamond! Pink Diamond. She was here?! Spinel could’ve sworn she heard her diamond giggling. Spinel loved hearing her diamond’s laugh but this time it sounded more…

Malevolent.

Something about it was not right. It was as if her diamond was laughing at her rather than with her. She wasn’t even laughing at her in the good way either. The poor gem had to listen on as her diamond’s voice began to mock her, telling her all sorts of cruel and nasty things. From telling her that she was worthless to she was never intending on coming back for her. It even came down to she never wanted a clingy spinel in the first place let alone a friend like her at all.

“You’re such a stupid naive little gem thinking I woild want a a clingy little toy like you. A pearl is far more superior than you.” Pink Diamond said coldly.

Spinel’s body trembled, her eyes widened in horror. This...this couldn’t be happening. Why?! Why was she saying all of these horrible things?! What had she done to deserve that? Had she truly not played the game right? Was Pink angry that she had lost? Or was it something that she had done that she didn’t know yet.

“Having you as a best friend was the last thing I wanted. You were merely a replacement for my broken pearl. I can’t believe the other diamonds gave me an old and boring toy which became useless to me over time.” Pink’s voice hissed.

Spinel shook violently. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“A gem who was so clingy and needy, so annoying you were practically begging for your shattering. You were just a disgusting little parasite p. Clinging to whatever showed it a small amount of attention and love.” Pink Diamond laughed cruelly.

Spinel whimpered choking back painful sobs that she desperately wanted to release. She didn’t want to hear any of this she didn’t want to hear what else her diamond disliked about her. Spinel shuttered as she heard her diamond speak again.

“I hated everything about you Spinel. I hated the way you walked, the way you spoke in that annoyingly high pitched voice. The way your shoes made that awful squeaky sound. I hated how you were presented to me in such a disgraceful fashion with her stupid baby like appearance and your heart buns and clothes. Everyone looked down on me for having such a childish gem like you. They all treated me like a less than...all because of you.” Pink Diamond hissed bitterly.

Spinel shook tremors racked her frame as her eyes wr blinded and blurred by the tears of sorrow that streamed down her soft cheeks. Spinel shut her eyes, her face contorting in pain as she listened on. Was this true?! Had she really been so terribly to her diamond that she was the rea- Spinel opened her eyes to see that...no one was here….it was just her. The small pink gem had blinked..but she had seen...she had seen Pink Diamond..

Hadn’t she?

Spinel blinked a couple more times and shuttered. Maybe….maybe it was all in her head. Maybe Spinel might have imagined all of that stuff. The pink gem didn’t know what happened, it sounded like Pink but Spinel could never see if it was really her. Whatever it was it was both scary and buzzard. Spinel had no idea what had happened to her. Spinel really wanted to move but couldn’t bring herself to investigate the sounds she heard. It was due to fear of upsetting her diamond and fear of what could be in the garden with her.

Spinel tried to ignore the dark feelings and the prickling paranoia that crept up in the back of her head. The young gem couldn’t wrap her Brian around it that she had heard her diamond but hadn’t seen her go through the warp pad. The pink heart shaped gem sighed, she hoped that her diamond would come back soon, she desperately wanted wanted to play something other than this game and move around again.

Her legs, ankles, feet and back were killing her and Spinel was getting awfully tied. Spinel slowly began thinking that what if her diamond really wasn’t coming for her? This left a painful feeling to rattle in her gem causing Spinel to wince and whimper. Pink wouldn’t forget her. Would she? Spinel bit her lip to the point that she had accidentally made it bleed. That was the odd thing about her, most gems don’t bleed yet..,Spinel did somehow.

How strange. Maybe she could ask Oink about it when she got back? Spinel grimaced at the taste of her own blood. That metallic metal taste was both bitter and gross. Then there was a bright pink flash that grabbed the young gem’s attention. Spinel knew that it was the garden's communicator and turned to face it. Was it Pink? Had she connected to the communicator to tell Spinel that she was coming to get her and to be patient.

That’s when Spinel spotted all three diamonds. All three of them. Yellow, Blue, and oh my stars there was White Diamond. She was also there too. Spinel had only seen White Diamond once it was when she wa gifted to Pink however seeing her left the small gem nervous as an aching feeling resinated inside her gem.

#steven universe #spinel steven universe #Stevnel #stevniel #diamond steven #fanfic #crystal gems

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princessbunnyblossom · 5 years ago

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Roses and Bitemarks Ch 1

Out in the middle of space stood a lone garden, it had appeared abandoned the flowers and plant life had long done withered away and died. The pillars of the garden were crumbling and damaged and the grass grew to an unkempt level where it gave the garden a more uneasy look making the garden itself look unsettling and creepy. It was dark and all alone in the garden stood a small pink gem. She looked just as unkempt and disheveled as the garden, her hair a messy and tangled mess. Her once heart buns now slowly dissipating and losing their structure to becoming more pigtail like. Her clothing was also dirty unclean from thousands of years waiting alone for a certain someone to return. Her heart shaped gem was dull and filthy from all the grime that built up over the years. She was made to be a playmate for the lonely Pink Diamond. She was told to wait here and remain still until she comes back. But…. She hasn't come back yet. What could possibly be taking her so long? Spinel. The lovely pink gem’s name was ; waited patiently for her Diamonds return and was getting so bored it could bring anyone to tears and it was beginning to hurt standing so long and so still. Well that might be due to the thorns and vines wrapping around her ankles and feet keeping her in place. It hurt...it hurt a lot. If she moved she could feel the sharp thorns on some of the vines cut her ankles causing blood to spill down her now open cuts. The small young gem winced as she bit her lip trying not to move. If she moved she would surely lose the game. She obviously could not afford to lose this game. Spinel sighed softly as she stared out into the garden which was rotting away,, the pink gem began having doubtful thoughts. ‘What if she doesn't come back.’ Her mind asked. Spinel shook her head but it was far too late as her thoughts were consumed by much darker ones. ‘She left you here all alone because she doesn't want to play with you.’ Her mind taunted. Spinel shook her head not liking these thoughts . She shouldn't be thinking this way, what would her Diamond sa-; Oh...she wasn't here right now. Spinel sighed looking down and rubbing her arms. How long had it truly been? Six thousand years possibly. Spinel yet again sighs. She just wants to see her Diamond again. Then the dark thoughts arose. ‘Why would she want to see you. You got her into trouble sometimes.’ Her mind growled. “Th-that was only on-one time. I-I promised I wo-wouldn't do it again .” Spinel said shakily trying not to whimper as she waited for Pink Diamond to return. That's when a pink light flashed across the screen if the communicator in the garden was…..working all of a sudden. Then she heard the ever so powerful voice of White Diamond. Spinel turned to face the monitor and listened...or tried too as her dark thoughts seemed to sweep into her head causing a whole cluster of feelings and emotions. ‘She let because you were so annoying.’ Her mind hissed. Spinel winced as she shook slightly.. ‘Pink Diamond only wanted to do big gem things not play with baby gems like you.’ Spinel sniffed tears threatening to spill down her cheeks. “My fellow it is with a heavy heart that although our beloved Pink Diamond is no longer with us Pink had given up her form to give birth to her son. Pink brought us her darling son Steven Universe who will be rightfully taking the throne of his mother as a new Diamond among us.” White Diamond said proudly. Spinel could only stare in both confusion and horror. So… Pink Diamond she… ‘She abandoned you.’ Her mind echoed. Spinel swallowed a painful lump in her throat. She could only stare at the pink screen. The young Spinel in over six this and years began to finally move and ran towards the communicator. Spinel tried to run as fast as she could run, it had been so long since she ran she almost thought her legs might not run at all. However just as she thought she could reach the communicator it had began to shut off finishing with its message. Spinel skidded to a stop making sure she doesn't bump into anything. This abruptly caused Spinel to trip over a rock causing the poor gem to crash harshly onto the cold ground below. Spineo sniffed as she sat up bringing her legs up to her chest and wrapping her arms around her legs as she buried her face into her knees. Then she proceeded to cry. Spinel cried softly in the dark garden her broken sobs echoed off against the walls of the garden. Her cries of sorrow and despair would be unheard by those on Himeworld but would only be heard by the lone Spinel herself who wept softly in the abandoned garden which once held breuty but held nothing but darkness. It felt like hours as the poor gem cried her eyes out. Spinel sobbed and shook not caring how red her face was from crying or how violently she shook or how broken and pained her sobs sounded. She didn't care if her eyes were wet and puffy from crying she was hurt. How could her Diamond so something like that to her? Was Spinel bad? Did she not love her anymore?Was Spinel annoying? Why did she leave Spinel all alone?

#steven universe #spinel steven universe #stevniel #stevnel #fanfic #vampire

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princessbunnyblossom · 5 years ago

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Roses and Bitemarks Ch 8

Spinel couldn't reply; she could only meekly groan in pain. She could sense the person near her frowned. “You poor soul.” The male voice said. The small pink gem could feel the male come closer to her and gasped when she felt a pair of lips press gently against her bite wound. “N-ngh- st-stop….please.” Spinel whimpered. The pink gem could feel something warm yet wet lick and trail up her wounds lapping up some of the blood of said shoulder wound causing the heart shaped gem to whimper in fear. Why was this happening? Why was this happening to her? Spinel could feel tears bubble up at the corners of her pink eyes Why her? Spinel didn't mean to start crying, she couldn't help it, from the pain of the bite to the trauma of fighting a jasper and feeling so scared and vulnerable. Spinel shook sniffling pitifully. She was so scared she just wanted everything to stop for a moment so she could at least try to keep up. “I'm sorry if it hurts.” Came an apologetic tone from the male voice. The small pink gem couldn't reply. “Just trust me on this.” The male voice said. Spinel looked up at his direction and surprisingly nodded. She had already been bitten by a jasper quartz soldier and a zircon so she could surely brace herself for more. Though she didn't think she could be bitten again. She was afraid of what had happened, that the poor thing shook out of fear. “Shh~. It's alright I'm not gonna hurt you. Just relax.” Came a calm and soothing tone from the mysterious male voice. As much as Spinel wanted to protest she found herself beginning to let her guard down and allowed her body to relax a little. The small heart shaped gem didn't understand why she listened but so,etching about this male’s voice seemed to ease her of her worries. It honestly felt so nice to not get so scared. So Spinel did as asked and relaxed her body a little more. “Good girl~” she heard him purr. The small pink gem flushed w light red not use to such sweet praise but she happily took it. Spinel shivered as she felt that wet appendage lapping up some more of her blood leaving a rather pleasant feeling behind. “A-ahh~~” Spinel moaned whimpered. There came a chuckle from the figure who mumbled out. “Cute.” Before proceeding on with his licks and gentle kisses. His kisses were oh-so gentle and sweet, there was something about them that was making Spinel relax and oddly enough she began enjoying them a little. They were making the pain she was feeling disappear as if his soft gentle kisses were healing her wound. However she would never voice out her opinions to him. That would be so embarrassing. She would poof from the sheer thought of him seeing her enjoy such affection. She couldn't help it though, it had been so long since she had ever close contact or any gentle touches or hugs. She was terribly touch starved that she eagerly took any opportunity to be held or cuddled. Sides this felt much better than with Jasper. Jasper’s licks made her feel unsafe, dirty and very much unwanted but this. This felt so nice and welcoming and sweet that Spinel very much enjoyed this. Spinel bit her lip feeling him lick her shoulder wound again before giving it a soft kiss. That warm yet wet tongue against her soft skin gave her another shiver it felt so pleasant and delightful that the small gem shuttered and tried to prevent herself from making any noise. “Aahh~~” She moaned softly before quickly placing her hands to her mouth fave fuming a deep red. Did she?...did she actually make that noise? Spinel could feel her face fume a deep red and stared up at the mysterious man who was staring at her, or what appeared to be staring at her. “My~, my~.. Were you enjoying that?” He teased. Spinel flushed a lovely deep rose red looking away shamefully. She quickly began to apologize. “I-I'm sorry! I di-didn't mean too!” She cried wanting to disappear. The male figure simply chuckled again. “It's alright.” He assured the small pink gem. Spinel blushed and looked away; she honestly couldn't help it. His kisses truly felt as if they had healed her wound and the small .pink gem could feel the pain from her wound dissipating. Spinel’s attention was instantly grabbed when the male spoke up. “I would love if we could meet again you know.” He said calmly. Spinel smiled kindly up at the male. This was the first person who had treated her kindly without wanting to hurt her or bite her so his words made her feel happy for a good moment. “I would also like to meet you again too.” She said shyly. There came a mumble of ‘cute’ from the male figure before he spoke again. “Something tells me that we’ll see each other again very soon.” He says. Spinel looked up curious. “How do you know?” Spinel asked. “A little blue bird told me.” The male voice said. A little blue bird? What could that possibly mean? Spinel tried to think but there was no time to dwindle on that as Spinel awoke and looked around anxiously. Did that jasper gem reform? If so was she following her? Spinel swallowed hard and got to her feet. If that was the case she should probably keep moving the last thing she wanted was to have another fight. As the pink gem proceeded to leave she glanced at her bite wound on her shoulder caused by none other than that quartz soldier she had previously fought. To her surprise the wound itself ceased in all pain and was fading and looking much better. Spinel signed hopefully she could find a much better place to stay in. So the young gem with shaky legs pressed onward with determination on wanting to see more of Homeworld. Spinel stared out to what looked to be a city. Well if she knew what a city was that was what she was staring at. Maybe she could seek refuge there. As Spinel ventured into the city with green lights the small gem sorta stuck out like a sore thumb. Her pink appearance popped out more than anything. Spinel gazed around seeing so many peridots and other working gems like a couple of bismuths. Spinel never saw any of them before since she was rarely seen outside the garden. Was Pink embarrassed about having Spinel around? That's why she was kept in the garden, away from anyone to see her. Kept away from higher up gems or Homeworld in general. Because she was an embarrassment to have around. A diamond having a lowly spinel as a best friend, a useless one at that. One who couldn't make her happy since she eventually left her. Pink Diamond didn't want to be seen with such a childish and embarrassing gem so maybe that's why she left Spinel? Spinel began blocking away tears and swallowed a painful lump in her throat. She didn't want to think about any of that. The pink gem stopped and watched as two peridots excited a dark greenish black building and Spinel wobbled inside asking for a room and when offered one the tiny pink gem accepted and tirelessly went inside the door shutting behind her and she sat in the corner of said room. She was tired once again and wanted nothing more but to sleep again, despite sleeping moments ago. Then again she did get out of a rather nasty right with Jasper which exhausted her. Spinel winced feeling the slight pain in her midsection from the blow that Quartz soldier landed on her. Spinel pulled the same blanket given to her when Yellow Zircon had attacked her out of her gem and draped it over her shoulders. At least she managed to keep something a little useful. When Spinel could no longer keep her eyes open the tiny gem drifted away from the world around her . When Spinel opened her eyes again she was no longer in the same green room, rather she was in a completely different room. This room was unlike the room she had been in, it was much larger and the color,pink was pure evidence she was no longer in the same room or building for that matter. The small young gem was laying on something soft and welcoming whatever it was; it had soft pink comforters and silk sheets very comfortable but that's besides the point.. Another thing Spinel noticed was her clothes. The small heart shaped gem was hearing a lovely extravagant gown. A light pink cascading into a darker pink down the gown with lovely pink lace trimmings for sleeves and alongside the sweetheart neckline. However Spinel hadn't changed at all? So…..who changed her? Spinel could feel her face burn a gentle rose red and shook her head not wanting to dwell on it any more. Wait?.....what was that? Was that?....music? Spinel slowly got off of the soft comfortable spot she was laying on and proceeded to follow the sound. Her dress draped against the floor as she opened the door and peered out a long corridor which lead to a pair of double doors. Spinel, walked closer to the door and could hear music playing faintly behind the door. What was in there? Spinel just had to find out curiously was quickly getting the better of her, before she could enter though two pearls appeared in front of her. Their faces were blurred but she could see clear as day that they were pearls. “Welcome.” They both said in Union. .

#Stevnel #stevinel #spinel steven universe #steven universe #fanfic #vampire

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