#but the job i might take is working with the government documents we get in the library and sounds like it would be interacting with more

[gent]

my only project at work rn consists of just saving pdfs and uploading them and adding them to spreadsheets for 7 hours and it is so incredibly brain numbing

[brunchable]

Reverse Government Watch

《Bucky Barnes x F!Reader》 [18+]

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x f!reader

Themes: Another Comedy, 18+ for Sexual Jokes/Humor.

Summary: You were assigned to watch Bucky who was under the Government Watch List. You are a rookie and your biggest mistake was thinking that Bucky wasn't onto you, let alone flip the tables on you.

A/N: HELP. It's just me again laughing my ass off at my own creation. . . my stomach hurts.

You strolled along the market, eyes fixed on the man across—James Buchanan Barnes, otherwise known as Bucky. Your target. You’d been assigned by the higher-ups to keep a close watch on him. For weeks, you’d trailed his every move, documenting his day-to-day activities. He had no idea. Or at least, you thought he didn’t. It was supposed to be a simple job—observe, report, make sure Bucky didn’t get into trouble.

Easy, right?

WRONG.

For someone under government surveillance, Bucky Barnes had an uncanny ability to make your life hell.

Take today, for example. You were tailing him as he leisurely strolled through a farmer’s market, like some guy who definitely wasn’t a former assassin. He picked up a pineapple and inspected it like it was a rare artefact. Turning it over in his hands, he squinted, furrowed his brow, and gave it a little sniff.

Was this a code? Who buys a pineapple with that much focus?

Your phone buzzed in your lap. Another message from your supervisor:

"Status update on the target?"

You sighed, trying not to sound as exasperated as you felt, and quickly typed back:

"All quiet. He’s… buying fruit?"

As you looked back up at Bucky, you saw it—a flicker on his face. Was that… a smirk? You narrowed your eyes. Could he sense you watching him? No way. You were a professional.

He strolled further into the market, seemingly unfazed, but then stopped to pull out his phone. You kept your distance, casually pretending to check out a nearby stall as you listened in.

“Yeah, Doc, I’m here,” Bucky said, his tone oddly serious. Doc? You frowned. Was he taking a doctor’s call in the middle of a farmer’s market? You shifted closer, your curiosity piqued, trying to catch more of the conversation.

There was a long pause, and you could faintly hear someone on the other end of the line. That’s when you noticed Bucky clear his throat, fighting to keep a straight face.

“Well… how much smaller are we talking?” Bucky’s voice dropped, sounding uncomfortably low.

Wait. What?

You blinked, your mind screeching to a halt. Smaller?

Another pause. Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose and muttered into the phone, his voice a little quieter now, but just loud enough for you to hear.

“Yeah… I guess the size reduction surgery worked a little too well.”

Your hand flew to your mouth to stifle the laughter that was about to escape. Reduction surgery? You stared at the pineapple in your hand, trying to act natural, but nearly dropped it.

From the corner of your eye, you saw Bucky glancing around as if he was worried someone might overhear him. You quickly ducked behind a display of vegetables, barely able to contain yourself.

“No, no, it’s fine,” Bucky said, sounding way too resigned. “I’ll just, uh… I’ll live with a small penis.”

You slapped a hand over your mouth, your shoulders shaking with barely-contained laughter. This can’t be real.

“It’s not that noticeable,” Bucky continued, his tone dripping with fake optimism. “Well… maybe a little. But who’s paying attention, right?”

At this point, you were desperately trying to stay quiet, hiding behind a tower of tomatoes, tears forming in your eyes from trying not to laugh out loud. I’m reporting this. I have to report this. I’m definitely reporting this… right? RIGHT?

Bucky sighed heavily into the phone. “Look, Doc, I’ll just deal with it. If it gets worse, I’ll call you. I mean, I’m managing so far. It’s not that bad—At least I don’t have a third leg anymore.”

Just as Bucky was about to hang up, you heard a loud, very faint voice from the other end of the line:

“BUCKY, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!”

The voice was unmistakably angry, but you couldn’t make out who it was or what was said. You just caught the frustrated tone and Bucky’s subsequent expression as he tried to suppress a laugh.

Bucky quickly hung up, his face the picture of fake mortification. He turned toward you—or where he thought you weren’t hiding—completely unaware that you were barely surviving behind a pile of produce.

With an exaggerated sigh, he mumbled, “Stupid doctors… never listen,” and casually tossed the phone into his pocket like he hadn’t just fake-confessed to penis reduction surgery in the middle of a public space.

As Bucky strolled away, you finally let out the laugh that had been building inside you, leaning against a stack of cucumbers for support. 

The next hour passed in an irritating series of mundane activities. Bucky went to a bakery, and then visited a pet store where he bought a massive bag of cat food. Now you were sure something was up. There is no way he has a cat.

Determined not to lose sight of him, you followed him into the park, keeping a safe distance while pretending to check your phone. He wandered over to a food cart and, to your surprise, bought an ice cream cone. Alright, nothing suspicious there, you thought, relaxing slightly. Just a man enjoying some ice cream. Totally normal.

That is, until he sat down on a nearby bench and began to eat the ice cream in the most unnecessarily slow, deliberate way possible.

At first, you didn’t think much of it. People eat ice cream in the park. But then, Bucky ran his tongue slowly up the side of the cone, swirling it around the top, before taking a ridiculously small bite off the tip. You blinked. What is he doing?

It got worse.

Bucky took another long, languid lick—far too slow for comfort—before tilting his head back slightly and letting out a soft groan of satisfaction. You almost dropped your phone. Was he... making out with the ice cream?

You shook your head, blinking rapidly. This can’t be real. What is even happening right now?

Your mind raced as you sat there, frozen, watching him turn a simple snack into something that looked like it belonged in a very different kind of movie. He wasn’t looking directly at you, but you could swear that every now and then, his eyes flickered in your direction, as if testing the waters.

Does he know?

No. No way. He was just... really into his ice cream, right?

But then he did it again. Another slow lick, this time letting a bit of the ice cream melt down his hand. He slowly licked the drip, eyes half-lidded, as if savoring every moment. You could feel your face heating up, and you were seriously contemplating whether or not to just leave.

Get a grip, Y/N, you told yourself, struggling to maintain some semblance of professionalism. He doesn’t know you’re watching. He’s just... very enthusiastic about ice cream.

But no matter how hard you tried to convince yourself, it was impossible to look away. You were completely and utterly trapped in this bizarre moment, and every time you thought it couldn’t get worse, it did.

Bucky took one last exaggerated bite, wiped his mouth, and let out a final, satisfied sigh. He stood up, stretched as if he hadn’t just devoured the ice cream in the slowest, most horniest way possible, and casually tossed the napkin in the trash.

He hadn’t even looked directly at you once. But somehow, you knew. You just knew. You wanted to disappear into the earth. How had this become your life?

You let out a long, slow breath, your heart racing as you fumbled for your phone to text your supervisor:

"Update: Subject... is eating ice cream. I’m pretty sure he just made an ice cream cone feel... emotions. Requesting transfer. Please advise.”

Bucky, blissfully unaware—or so it seemed—adjusted his jacket and casually strolled away, leaving you questioning your life choices and wondering if you’d ever be able to enjoy ice cream again.

But then things got even weirder.

The next day at the gym, Bucky seemed hell-bent on driving you insane. He spent an obscene amount of time flexing in front of the mirror. But this wasn’t your standard, after-rep, admire-your-workout progress. 

No. 

This was Bucky in full pose mode. First, it was a casual bicep curl. Then, he turned slightly, flexing just enough to give you a perfect view of his ridiculous muscles rippling beneath his shirt.

You were pedalling on a stationary bike nearby, pretending not to notice, but every few minutes, he’d “stumble” just enough to catch himself dramatically, sending a sly wink your way.

You fought the urge to roll your eyes so hard they might get stuck in the back of your head. Is he doing this on purpose?

Your phone buzzed on your leg again, another message from your supervisor:

"Status update?"

Bucky wasn’t done yet. He sauntered over to the free weights and picked up a dumbbell. Then, with one hand, he started curling it, while the other hand was on his chin like he was deep in thought. It was like watching a Greek statue come to life, except the statue was a cocky jerk who knew exactly what he was doing.

You quickly typed back:

"Subject is…exercising. Very… intensely."

He turned his head just enough to catch your eye in the mirror, smirked, and then—oh no—he started pulling up his shirt.

He peeled it off in one smooth motion, revealing abs that looked like they were carved by the gods themselves. He stood there, shirt slung over his shoulder, flexing as if this were a damn photo shoot, while you nearly choked on your own saliva. His grin grew wider, eyes never leaving yours.

Your mouth went dry.

Bucky turned slightly, making sure you had a perfect view, and winked at you again.

You nearly fell off the bike. He knows!

Panicking, you hopped off the bike, pretending you needed to stretch, trying desperately to regain your composure. When you bent down to touch your toes, Bucky started doing overhead stretches of his own, his muscles on full display. It was like he was taunting you, silently daring you to keep watching.

Just act casual. You’re a pro.

Then, to your absolute horror, he reached for the waistband of his pants. You froze. There is no way.

But the grin on his face said otherwise. He slowly hooked his fingers under the waistband, pulling down just enough to make you think he was about to strip right there in the middle of the gym.

Your face turned bright red. He wouldn’t.

But the look in his eyes said, oh, he absolutely would.

Before you could fully process the impending disaster, he stopped, chuckling to himself, and picked up his towel instead. He tossed you one last smug look before strolling toward the locker room, leaving you standing there, humiliated and furious.

Smug. Bastard.

For a moment, you just stood there, heart racing. You were supposed to be the one watching him, but somehow, he had turned the tables on you. He was messing with you, and there was no doubt in your mind now that he knew exactly what you were doing.

Later that evening, during his nightly run, Bucky continued to torment you. He alternated between sprinting at full speed and walking so slowly that you nearly ran into him. He’d glance over his shoulder now and then, and each time you scrambled to hide behind a tree or a bench, but it was useless. 

He knew.

Then, without warning, he turned down an alley. You cursed under your breath, jogging after him. When you reached the alley, it was empty. You blinked, confused. 

Where the hell did he go?

Suddenly, a low voice whispered from behind you.

“Lose something?”

You jumped about three feet in the air, spinning around to find Bucky casually leaning against the wall, arms crossed, smirking like a damn Cheshire cat.

“Oh, uh…” you stammered, scrambling for an excuse. “I was just…uh, taking a shortcut.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow, stepping closer. “Sure you were. You know, you’re not very good at this.”

“At what?” you asked, your heart thumping in your chest.

“Spying.” He grinned, clearly enjoying himself.

Your eyes widened in shock. “I—I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Right.” His voice dripped with sarcasm. “Look, I’ve known you’ve been watching me for weeks.”

Your stomach dropped. “You…you knew?”

Bucky laughed, stepping closer until he was practically in your space. 

“Oh, sweetheart, I knew the second you started. The government thinks they can put someone on me without me noticing? Please.” He leaned in, eyes sparkling with amusement. “You stick out like a sore thumb.”

Heat rushed to your face. “I—well, I wasn’t exactly trying to—uh…”

“Relax,” he interrupted, grinning like he was having the time of his life. “I’m not mad. It’s kind of cute, actually.”

“Cute?” You blinked, completely thrown off.

“Yeah, cute. You’ve been trailing me like a lost puppy this whole time. I figured, why not have some fun with it?”

Your face flushed with embarrassment. “So all those weird things you’ve been doing…?”

“Oh, yeah,” Bucky said, eyes gleaming. “The pineapple? Messing with you. My penis reduction surgery? Messing with you. The gym flexing? Well, that’s for your benefit.”

You narrowed your eyes, glaring up at him. “You are ridiculous.”

“And you are adorable,” he shot back without missing a beat, that smug grin still plastered on his face. “But honestly, if you wanted to keep watching me, you could’ve just asked.”

You threw your hands up in frustration. “I’m working, Bucky!”

“Uh-huh, sure you are,” he teased, crossing his arms and nodding slowly. “Just doing your job. Nothing to do with how you’ve been staring at me like I’m the best thing since sliced bread.”

You stared at him, exasperated. “I was not staring!”

Bucky raised an eyebrow. “Oh really? So you didn’t nearly fall off that stationary bike when I took my shirt off? I thought I’d have to catch you mid-flight.”

“I was stretching!” you shot back, trying desperately to cling to some semblance of professionalism.

He snorted, clearly not buying it. 

“Uh-huh, ‘stretching.’ Sure.” He took a step closer, eyes sparkling with mischief. “Tell you what—how about next time, I give you a front-row seat?”

You blinked, caught off guard. “W-what?”

“Yeah,” he said, looking thoughtful for a second before flashing you a cheeky grin. “I’ll set up a chair for you. Maybe a little mood lighting—make it a real show. Wouldn’t want you to miss any of the good parts.”

“Who are you, magic mike?”

Bucky’s grin widened at your retort, clearly enjoying the banter. "Magic Mike? Nah. More like Winter Soldier: The Deluxe Edition. No cover charge, but tips are welcome."

"Oh my God. Please stop." You groaned, pinching the bridge of your nose. 

"Oh, come on," he said, his voice dripping with amusement. "You know you’d pay to see this show."

You shot him a look, trying desperately to hold on to your last shred of professionalism. "I’m not paying for anything, Barnes. You’re already driving me crazy for free."

Bucky shrugged, stepping even closer, his grin never fading. "I could throw in some choreography. Maybe a little side hustle? You know, just in case this whole ‘saving the world’ thing doesn’t work out."

You blinked at him, utterly deadpan. "What? You’re going to start dancing on rooftops now? Maybe slide down a fire pole?"

"Hey, if it gets your attention, why not?" he teased, a mischievous twinkle in his eye. "I bet you'd be first in line for tickets."

"Trust me, the last thing I need is to see you in stripper mode," you shot back, crossing your arms, though the corner of your mouth was twitching, fighting a smile.

"Are you sure?" Bucky’s grin was downright wicked now. "Because I was about five seconds away from launching into a full body roll at the gym yesterday."

You couldn't help it. You snorted. "Is that what you call your ‘workout routine’? I thought it was an interpretive dance routine. Very... expressive."

Bucky put a hand to his chest, pretending to be deeply moved. "Thank you. I put a lot of emotion into my workouts. Next time, I’ll make sure the music’s louder. Really set the mood. Maybe add a fog machine for drama."

You threw your hands up in defeat, laughing now. "I’m begging you, no fog machines! That’s it. I’m filing a report. Official complaint: Bucky Barnes is out of control. Send help immediately."

He chuckled, clearly satisfied with himself. "I’ll make sure to give them an even better show tomorrow. Maybe bring out the real moves. You won’t know what hit you, sweetheart."

You shook your head, still laughing. "Oh, believe me, I’m already regretting this entire assignment."

Bucky winked, giving you a mock salute as he started to walk away. "See you tomorrow, Agent. And don’t forget the popcorn. You won’t want to miss it. Maybe I’ll dance to Pony."

As he disappeared around the corner, you pulled out your phone to text your supervisor:

"Update: Subject is 100% insane. Considering requesting reassignment. Also, possibly suggest psychiatric help for him."

You sighed, a reluctant smile still tugging at your lips. Tomorrow was definitely going to be interesting.

Suddenly, your phone buzzed again. You groaned, assuming it was your boss with some last-minute instructions, but the message wasn’t from a saved contact. An unknown number. You furrowed your brows as you opened it.

"Oh, by the way, you look pretty today. I like you in blue."

Your heart stopped.

WTF.

Your eyes darted down at your clothes—blue office attire. Your pulse raced. How the hell—? You whipped your head around, scanning the area, expecting Bucky to pop out from behind a corner, but he was gone. Long gone.

Another buzz.

"See you tomorrow, Agent. ;)”

WTF.

[souliebird]

[[and then I met you || ch. 5]]

Series: Daredevil || Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader || Rating: Explicit

Summary:

A one-night stand years ago gave you a daughter and you are now able to put a name to her father – Matthew Murdock. Everything is about to change again as you navigate trying to integrate your life with that of the handsome and charming blind lawyer’s and Matt realizes he needs to protect his new family from not only Hell's Kitchen but from the world.

pt: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

words: 4.4k

It has been one week since you saw Matt Murdock on the evening news, and it feels like it has been a complete whirlwind. First, you reintroduced yourself to him and let him know he was a father, then you had a nice little outing, and to tie it all up, a trip to the doctors to confirm what you already knew. 

Matthew Murdock is the father of your daughter.

It is nice to have an official statement from a doctor and now you can start the process of changing Minnie's paperwork to include his name. You have to go to the courthouse to file for an updated birth certificate. Matt has very kindly offered to take that task on for you - he goes to the courthouse often for his job and he knows the ins-and-outs of navigating legal paperwork. You just have to go and drop off the right documentation. 

You had a brief call last night, after Minnie had been put down, and decided that you would visit his office today to do just that. You are going to kill two birds with one stone - hand over what needs to be filed and give Matt more time with his daughter. 

To your great surprise, your timid little Mouse absolutely adores him. She was not happy to have to be at the doctor's office yesterday and was on the verge of tears before he showed up. Her whole mood shifted, and she had spent the brief time you were in the waiting room and exam room telling Matt about different things around them. 

You have a feeling, when you sit down and tell her the truth, she is going to be thrilled. 

You told her that you are going to visit Matt at work today, and all morning she has been hunched over her sketchbook making pictures for him while you try to get in some hours at work. Try being the key word, as you've been thoroughly distracted by today's news cycle. 

You were half listening to a puff piece about something or other when breaking news flashed across the screen. A neighborhood in Connecticut has been leveled by some sort of explosion, killing hundreds. They don't know if it was an accident or some sort of attack - the epicenter of the blast was a school, so it could potentially be either. You pray it was a freak accident, some faulty pipeline or a weird meteor, because the world doesn't need any more horribleness in it. 

The idea that it might have been an attack makes you nervous. You've been through two horrible attacks on New York, and you didn't realize another big event so close to home would shake you so hard. 

It scares you that you have to raise Minnie in such a harsh world, where monsters of all kinds are very very real and you don't know who you can rely on. The police and government have been shown to be all kinds of corrupt and people who can shoot laser beams fight each other in the skies. 

You end up clocking out and going to sit with Minnie to get yourself to stop your doom-listening. She's got a few drawings scattered around the table and you pick up the one closest to you, smiling at her handy work. 

You recognize the shapes as her interpretation of people - oblongs with stick arms and noodle legs. Unknowingly, she's made her first new family portrait. There are three blob-people all holding hands: you suspect you're the big orange one with a smile, Minnie is the little pink one in the middle with what you guess are pigtails, and Matt is the black one with red eyes, who is also holding a stick. To confirm, you ask her.

"Is this one Mister Matt?"

Her head shoots up and a big grin spreads across her face, "Yeah!  And that's you and that's me and we're gonna go to the zoo!" There is a little flurry of motion and suddenly you are getting a picture show. She holds up the paper she was working on - there's another family drawing, but this time there's green scribbles all around you and a blue square with zig zags all over it. You guess that is some sort of animal. 

"You want to go to the zoo with Mister Matt?" You ask, examining her masterpiece.

"Yeah!" She says, pulling over another picture that you know are her versions of flowers, even if they are all different colors. "And the park!"

"And the park? Wow, that's a lot of things to do. Do you want to ask him if he wants to go to the zoo with us when we see him today?" Minnie eagerly nods at the question and that makes you smile. "Okay, we can invite him to the zoo. When are we going to the zoo?"

The question makes her bounce in excitement, "My birthday!" 

You laugh at her enthusiasm and give her a little back rub, "Exactly. We're going to go for your birthday. And get a big cake with whatever you want on it." That makes her a giggly mess and you temporarily forget all the bad things in the world. 

You hand her back her drawing before kissing the top of her hair, "How about you finish this one up and we get ready to go see Mister Matt? We can only visit for a little bit, because he's working, but I bet he'll love everything you made him."

Greedy little hands take back the paper and instantly Mouse is hunched back over her zoo scene, purple crayon in hand. You get up and go to make sure that you have everything you need to bring to Matt in order. You are extremely lucky that the doctor has the ability to print out things in Braille, so you don't need to make an extra stop to get things translated. 

You debate bringing Matt lunch, but ultimately decide against it. You don't want to push too much too fast, and you think it might be a little weird for his coworkers, to see a random person bring him homemade lunch. You know he hasn't told anyone yet about yourself and Minnie - he had shyly admitted it didn't feel real until the test results were given and you completely get it. 

You tidy up until you spy Mouse dropping her crayons into her bucket and cleaning up her drawing area. You let her do her thing, then approach, "Let's put your drawings with the other things we need to give Mister Matt. That way they won't get lost or wrinkled."

She nods like you've just said something very wise and gathers up her stack of papers before handing them over. There's five in total; the three she showed you and two more full of colorful lines. You decide you'll listen in on her explanation to Matt on those two, as you're curious as to what goes on in her little mind. 

Once everything is safe and ready to go, it's just a matter of getting shoes on. You go with your sensible sneakers while Minnie opts for her frog themed Wellingtons. The plan is for both of you to walk to the office, and after one final wallet-keys-phone check in your purse, you head out hand-in-hand.

It's mid-morning, so foot traffic is decent, but not heavy - nothing that makes Minnie too uncomfortable. Dark clouds are gathering on the horizon, and it makes you wonder if the rain that has been promised in the forecast will be coming sooner than expected and you are glad this outing is the only one you have planned. Taking Minnie around in the rain is never fun. It always seems like everything becomes more bustling in the rain and trying to navigate that with a crying toddler just makes you want to cry as well. 

But the promise of her new favorite person and mild weather has her walking like the born and bred New Yorker she is - a determined little pout with no nonsense steps. No one will be trying to sell her things on the sidewalks once she gets bigger. If she had a different personality, you'd want to teach her to say "Hey, I'm walking here" just to hear a toddler say it. 

As you spy the building Matt's office is in, you realize you should have sent him a text to say you were on your way. You did let him know vaguely what time you planned to stop by and he had assured you that they had no appointments - it was catch up on paperwork day - but that didn't mean walk-in clients hadn't come by. You're so close to already being there that you think the gesture is pointless, so you just keep walking until you get to the building.

"This is where we are going," you tell Minnie as you approach. You scoop her up to show her the business directory on the outside of the building. There aren't very many plaques to begin with, so it's easy to find the Nelson, Murdock, and Page one. "That is where Mister Matt works with his friends."

She leans out and feels over the embossed sign, running her fingers over the different letters. "'M'! For Minnie!" She says, pointing out the letter with a big smile. 

"Exactly. Mister Matt's last name starts with M, too. That word is his last name - Murdock."

That gets her to turn back to the sign, fingers dancing over the letters, brows knitting with curiosity, "How is it spelled?"

You spell out Murdock for her and Minnie repeats each letter after you. You do this a few times until she's able to say it out loud on her own. You don't know how long she'll retain the information, as spelling isn't really on the board yet, but you're happy she's interested. You set her back down and she makes a beeline up the steps, grabbing and pulling at the door with all her three-year-old strength. 

The lobby to the building is sparse, with basically only an elevator and staircase, with a door to what you suspect is a supply closet. "We're going up two staircases," you tell your daughter. 

"Two!" She confirms before taking off towards the stairs. You have a brief moment of panic that she's going to zip up both sets faster than you can catch her, but to your great amusement, she grabs a hold of the banister with both hands and pretends to use it like a mountaineering rope to climb the stairs. She even adds little fake huffs and puffs. You follow behind her, ready to catch her if she slips. She doesn't, and when you get to the floor Matt's office is on, she turns to beam at you, clearly proud of herself, "We did it!"

"We did it," you parrot, offering out your hand again. She takes it and you lead her to the correct door. The same plaque that was on the exterior of the building also hangs beside their door and Minnie astutely points to it.

"Murdock!" 

"That's right, it says Nelson, Murdock, and Page."

"Can I knock?" Mouse asks, raising her fist to do just that.

You hum, then gently explain, "This is business, which means work. For work, we don't have to knock. We can go in if it is open."

As soon as you say that she's opening the door and marching inside and you quickly follow her. 

Matt's law partners, Foggy and Karen, are in the reception area with a man you assume is a client of theirs, talking in hushed annoyed sounding whispers. He radiates intimidation, with a huge black eye and what looks to be a makeshift cast made of duct tape around his right wrist. The three of them turn to look at you and you get the sense Minnie had the right idea in asking if she should knock first. 

Your little one quickly latches onto your leg, turning timid in the space of a second and you can't really blame her. Part of you wants to turn and run. 

Karen recovers first, breaking away from the two exasperated men to step towards you and going into receptionist mode, "Hi. You were here last week to meet with Matt, right?" 

"Uh, yes, that's right. Is he, uh, available?" You ask, feeling like you no longer know how to speak English. The energy in the room is not a pleasant one and you very much feel like you've interrupted something important.

"He's on a call currently but I'll let him know you are here," Karen replies in a voice far kinder than what she uses to address the men behind her a beat later. She turns to them and points to the office you know is not Matt's. "In there. Now."

Foggy throws up his hands, like he's frustrated with whatever is going on and disappears into the other room. The man you don't know doesn't follow, eyes on you and your daughter as Karen crosses the room to knock on Matt's door before opening it and slipping into the office. You quickly decide you are not going to make eye contact with him, instead ducking your head and putting a comforting hand on Minnie's head. She's practically hidden herself behind your legs, clinging to your pants so tightly you fear they might rip.

"I like your boots," the man says into the quietness. You expect him to sound like gravel, but his gruff voice is rather soft, and you get the feeling he understands how to talk to children "My daughter used to have boots like those."

 Part of you wants to tell the man to not talk to your daughter, but that would be rude and just because he looks like he's been through the ringer doesn't mean he's a bad man. You decide to let her determine how she wants to proceed.

You feel Minnie poke her head out from where she's hidden herself. At first, you don't think she's going to reply, as you know how she is, but she surprises you yet again by mumbling out, "They're froggies." 

"Yeah? You like frogs?"

Mouse somehow tightens her grip, "I like animals." She presses her face against your leg, then admits, a little louder, "we're gonna to the zoo for my birthday."

That makes the man smile, and that changes his whole demeanor. Suddenly he looks friendly and kind and not like he's likely to stab you, "That's a good place to go for your birthday. How old are you gonna be?"

Before she can respond, the door to Matt's office swings open and Karen stalks out, followed by Matt, who seems much less agitated than everyone else. The blonde points to the unknown man, a little scowl on her face, "What did I say?"

The man holds up his hands defensively, stepping away from Karen and towards the office he was previously told to go in, "Alright, alright, I'm going. I'm going." That doesn't seem to help soothe her at all, as she grabs the man by the bicep and frog-marches him to join Foggy, closing the door behind them. 

"They didn't make you wait long, did they?" Matt asks, bringing your attention back to him. There is a cut on his lip that wasn't there the last time you saw him, and your instinct is to ask if he is okay, but you don't know if you are at that level with him yet.

So instead, you address his question, "No, no, we just got here."

He motions back to his office, a smile spreading across his face, and you almost forget about the cut, "Come on back and we can review everything." 

Minnie lets go of your pants only to take your hand again and you lead her into the other room. As you pass Matt, she looks up at him and gives a tiny wave.

"Hi, Mister Matt."

Matt's shoulders visibly relax at her greeting, and you can't help but start to smile, "Hi, sweetheart. How are you doing today?"

"Good! I maded you pictures," she says proudly. That causes him to pause as he starts to follow you into his office. You can tell he is surprised by the news - his voice gets a little choked up when he responds.

"You made me some pictures?"

"They are very good pictures," you advise, squeezing Minnie's hand slightly before letting go, "Do you want to tell Mister Matt what you drew for him?" She nods eagerly, so you point to one of the chairs in front of his desk. "Go sit like a big girl and you can tell him."

She makes a dash for the chair, and you take the time to address Matt, "I'm sorry, I should have called ahead."

He shakes his head, and as he walks past you to go behind the desk, he reaches out and brushes his hand along your arm. A little shiver runs up your spine at the touch and you tell yourself the action was so he could orient himself. "Not a problem, I knew you were coming. How is everything?"

"Everything is good," you reply, a little shyer than you intend to. "I, uh, have everything for you. Is there anything else I need to fill out?"

Matt shakes his head, "Just a signature and date. You've done all the work for me already. I don't think I've ever had to file where I don't need to actually do anything but sign the document. It's a refreshing change."

"Do you know how long it will take to process?" You ask as you move to join Minnie in sitting. "The website gave multiple timelines and I just want to be realistic."

Matt takes his seat with a cocky grin, "Not long at all, I know a few judges I can ask to push it through."

You flush at the idea of him asking a favor to a judge on your account, "That's not necessary, Matt, I don't mind waiting."

He shakes his head, getting that soft look again, "I don't want to wait. I want it to be official in the eyes of the government."  

His words make you feel even warmer, and you distract yourself by pulling the file with all the paperwork out of your purse and pass it over to him. "Minnie's additions are at the bottom of the stack. The last five pages"

His fingers twitch slightly, and you wonder if he wants to flip right to those. You get your answer quickly.

"Minnie, is it okay if I go over the paperwork with your mom before you tell me about your pictures?"

"It's okay!" She replies, her voice much more cheerful now that you are alone with Matt. "Do you needs help?"

Her sweetness makes Matt smile more and he shakes his head, "Not right now, sweetheart. I need to read, and I can do that with my fingers, but after that you can help with some other things."

"Okay," she says happily, kicking her feet a little bit.

You catch her attention and motion to your purse, "Do you want a toy while you wait?" 

She shakes her head and beams up at you, "No thank you, I'm a big girl!"

Both you and Matt chuckle at her declaration and he moves to open the file. 

"There's multiple copies of everything," you tell him as you move onto business, "One printed text and one in Braille for the courts and the same for you. I have the same at home, as well. They are bundled in packets. The court papers are on top, Braille first."

He thanks you then begins to read the forms. Mouse sits up straighter in her chair to try and see what he is doing. She can just peek over the edge, and she watches in fascination as his fingers move over the pages. You wait quietly, not wanting to distract in any way. 

"Everything appears to be in order. We will just need a signature," Matt says after a minute. 

"Should I do that now?" You ask. The response is him offering you a pen, so you lean in to sign the various forms. As you set each document aside, Matt adds his own signature. It is silly how giddy you feel just having the forms finally completed. You don't know how long you've had just blank copies, waiting to be filed. 

"And done," Matt says with a final flick of his pen on the last page. "I'm going to the courthouse on Tuesday, so I'll get it processed then. I'll push to get an updated certificate as quickly as possible."

You have to bite your lip to keep from smiling like a crazy person. This isn't some dream or far off fantasy. Matt isn't just saying he wants to be Minnie's father. He is following through, with urgency. This is something he wants and it's almost surreal for you - you are so used to promises being broken and no one being on the same page as you in your desires. Even if this is all for Minnie and not for you, it is still on the edge of overwhelming for you. 

You never thought you'd be so happy over paperwork. 

"Thank you, Matt," you whisper, leaning back into your seat to sit properly.

Immediately, Minnie parrots you, thanking Matt even though she has no idea what is going on.

"No, thank you. Thank you both," he says, and you wonder if he is also holding back from smiling. He gathers the papers and sets them aside before running his fingers over the folder you gave him and addressing his daughter. "Okay, sweetheart. Do you want to come tell me what you drew?" 

You expect Minnie to stand on the chair and even prepare yourself to balance her, but that does not happen. She hops down and scurries around the desk to be at Matt's side and a moment later, he is pushing his chair back and she is climbing up into his lap. Embarrassment rushes through you - she's only ever behaved like this with you. She actually used to fuss and cry if anyone else tried to hold her. You haven't seen her sit in anyone else's lap since she had a say in who gets to hold her.

"Minnie!" You scold but Matt quickly shakes his head as he helps her up.

"It's okay, I don't mind," he tells you even though he looks completely shocked. If he wasn't her father, you wouldn't allow this, especially with someone so new to her, but he is her father, even if she doesn't know, so you don't tell her to get down.

Instead, you give a stern frown, "Minnie, you still need to ask before climbing on anyone, okay? Can you apologize?" 

Your little girl nods, then looks up at him, "I'm sorry, Mister Matt."

"It's okay, sweetheart. Like I said, I don't mind, but your Mommy is right, and you should ask so I know you are there. Next time, you'll know. Now, your Mommy said there were five pictures. Which do you want to start with?" He asks, scooting his chair back to the desk while wrapping one arm around Minnie's waist to keep her secure. 

Once she's able to, she leans in and picks up the first drawing in the stack. It is the family portrait, and you quickly get your phone out so you can record this interaction as Minnie lays out the picture. She then takes Matt's free hand and guides it to the paper before letting go to point at the circle that represents him.

"This is you," she tells him. He quickly finds where she is pointing and begins to trace the figure. 

"That's me?" And there is definitely more than a little bit of emotion in his voice. 

"Uh-huh, and that is me and Mommy and we're gonna go to see the duckies. Mommy said we can go again. But we're gonna get ice cream too. And a balloon," she says, moving her little finger all over the page. 

You watch Matt's finger follow hers - first over the doodle of himself, then Minnie's, and finally yours. Then, he traces back to the center figure. "We're holding hands?" He asks tentatively.

"Yup!" She answers, popping the p. "Mommy says we gotta hold hands if we go outside." 

Matt licks his lips a little and you see his muscles flex under his jacket as he holds Minnie a little more firmly to his chest, like he doesn't want to let go of her. "That's a good rule." 

"Mommy makes good rules," your little one replies wisely. That makes your ego sing a little. Mouse has always been good at doing what she's told, and you are proud that she understands your rules keep her safe.

Before she moves onto the next picture, you gently prompt her. "Sweetie, was there something you wanted to ask Mister Matt?"

Matt's head jerks up at that, looking right to you with brows slightly knit. Minnie bounces in his lap just a little, squirming so she can turn to look up at him, "I'm gonna go to the zoo! For my birthday! Do you wanna go?"

His lips part in surprise at the question and before you know it, he has both his arms wrapped around Mouse, hugging her to him. She instantly responds, looping her little arms around his neck and squeezing back. He rests his cheek against her head, and you see him slightly rock her from side to side. "I would love to go with you to the zoo, sweetheart."

Minnie giggles into his neck and you one hundred percent know that the transition to suddenly having two parents is not going to be hard for her at all. It might be confusing because Matt won't be living with you, but you have never seen her so comfortable with someone who isn't you. You know it's not just because he gave her a toy. They just click together so well.

You switch from video to your camera so you can sneak as many pictures as you can of Matt and Minnie hugging. They've completely forgotten about you and that is a-okay. 

In this moment, nothing else matters to you - not the strange man in the other office or the devastation a few states over or all the other trivial things that nag you and make your stomach turn. 

Your world is right in front of you and for the first time in a very, very long time, you really, truly believe everything is going to be just fine. 

@midnightreids @cloudroomblog @yeonalie @thychuvaluswife 

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Devil May Halloween - The Samhain Ritual - Vergil's Path

Devil May Halloween 2023 - The Samhain Ritual, Vergil's Path

Pairing: Vergil x Reader

Summary: It’s finally Halloween and, even if the demons are a lot more active this time of the year, that doesn’t stop you from going on hunts - the partying can be done later. Or… At least that was what you thought. Maybe Nero had pretty good reasons to worry about that job after all.

Author's Notes: Fucking finally part 2 hahahaha I deeply apologize for taking so long to post Vergil's part. As some of you might have seen here, my dad suffered an accident and my life turned upside down the last few months - I'm still managing, doing damage control hahaha but slowly getting back on track with my writing.

But here is Vergil's part! Be sure to read the Prologue first to understand this madness and, if you're a Dante appreciator, fret not, the red devil part is here.

I have to thank my dear friend @furyeclipse for sending me this idea as an ask a thousand years ago - and now, it is finally done! You can check Fury's work on ao3 right here, I highly recommend it!

I'm also going through a phase of powerful monsters (vampires, demons, the whole unholy pantheon) being on their knees for their human partner and, oh boy, it shows. I'm not apologizing. Oh. And the Helen of Troy/Sparta is NOT a gendered thing. It's more of being recognized as the most beautiful among mortals, enough to cause a war for their love. And yes there's a Ghost reference in there, I FINALLY got to properly listen to their music and man, why did I sleep on them for so long??

Devil May Halloween 2023 - Vergil's Path

Demonic marriages. There was a topic you had to admit you were completely ignorant about.

Vergil had mentioned it once. You did ask him when Sparda’s and Eva’s union arose as a subject in one of your researches one day – for, as far as you knew, marriages were religious and it did make you wander if demons had their own religion or only rituals.

That subject was very muddy, as per Vergil’s words. His own knowledge on the matter was very limited – and that was something new for you.

“Hmmm. A very good question indeed.” Vergil murmured as he put down his book on the table, raising his silvery eyes to you. The library was dead quiet, but his voice was always so low it wasn’t a concern – even if you both were the only living beings in that place at that hour. “You could say some demons are powerful enough to be viewed as gods, but those would be only the likes of Mundus.”

“And Sparda…?” Oh, you had to ask. After all, wasn’t Sparda the only demon strong enough to defeat Mundus? Who could ever defeat a being as powerful as a god? Only a god as well, at least in your mortal eyes.

Vergil allowed a proud smile to spread over his lips as nodded in agreement.

“Well, we do have Fortuna as an example of people worshipping demons as gods, so humans praying to demons doesn’t really surprise me. There are plenty of cults and even churches who do that.” You shrugged, organizing your books and papers, passing him a list of demonic cults you had been keeping track over the years. You weren’t one to judge, but, seeing your occupation was to slaughter demons, it was always good to keep an eye on them. “Eva and Sparda getting married made me wonder. Marriages are very religious, how did Sparda deal with that? Given his story, I don’t think it was only a civil ceremony for government benefits, right?”

“Right indeed…” Vergil once again murmured, curiously reading your list. It was a very thorough and good document, and he couldn’t stop himself to think how it was smart of you to do that. He had a list of people to keep an eye on as well now. “I’ve never really wondered about that as a child, for I didn’t know much of the world back then. We tend to accept that what we see and what it’s said to be true… But after I started researching and learning, it did spark my interest. As far as I can tell you, my father accepted my mother’s faith and married her by her rules, not the opposite. He would never do that just out of a civil agreement, he really did it for love.”

“So even with the power of gods, demons don’t have religions.”

“Again, that is a very good question. I never could really answer it with certainty.” Vergil sighed, leaving your list on the table between you and raising his silvery eyes to yours once more. “As impressive as it sounds, demons don’t lack faith. Some of them do worship more powerful demons as deities, and some of them do join each other in cults. As far as I could observe in Hell, they are very similar to humans on that matter: each has their own set of rules and beliefs and most of them kill each other for their ‘gods’.”

“Huh. Humanity once again proving they can be quite demonic.” You scoffed while rolling your eyes. Religious wars were as old as History itself and it was quite ironic for you to hear that was something present in demonic History as well.

“Or demons proving once again they have something of human after all.” Vergil shrugged after observing you a few long seconds, before turning his eyes to another one of his books again. “I’d argue not all humans, though. Differently from demons, most of them save themselves from being devilish and evil.”

“Hmmm. A few demons can also save themselves from that fate.” You had a slight smile on your lips, turning to your tea mug nearby. “And those who do can be even kinder than humans.”

That conversation would find its end right there that night, as both of you went back to your books and research – but you were able to see a slight smile on Vergil’s lips and how his eyes seemed to have softened after that.

Even if your Dark Slayer could soften under your words, you doubted other demons would do that – and even went as far as doubting they would have something close to a human heart. Vergil was different from all the demons in that place; and so, marriage was the last word you ever expected to hear.

But there you were, locked in a derelict room with Kyrie, surrounded by the long gone gothic architecture of a cathedral that once stood proud among those lands – now rotten, decayed, desecrated and with its colorful glass mosaics shattered everywhere, it was taken by demons to perform their unholy ritual.

“We’re really in it now, aren’t we Kyrie…?” You sighed back to the only human soul with you in that place – the only hope in that godforsaken night, lit only by the flickering warm light of candles. “Marriage. I did not expect it would be this way, though, I’ll tell you that much.”

“I didn’t expect it either…” Kyrie sighed in complete desolation, staring at a loose stone on the floor. “Nero is going to be so mad.”

“I can only imagine.” You answered with a giggle, taking a seat at rotten wood bench that once served as a place for priests to read while doing their own religious researches. “I don’t think Vergil is going to be very pleased as well.”

“Oh.” And it finally seemed to down on Kyrie who your lover was and how much trouble those demons were in. “Did he… Ever tell you about something like this…?”

“Well, marriage is not really a topic that usually arises with Vergil…” You had your eyes lost on an old bookcase, imagining if any of those would be worth a read. Not that you had too much time for that at the moment, but you were quite disturbed. If it was only you in that situation, you would be more at ease, but Kyrie’s presence changed everything. “But he did tell me about a similar ritual between humans and demons. The human usually isn’t a consenting participant though.”

Raising your eyes to hers, Kyrie felt a shiver down her spine. She knew exactly what you meant and that whole situation was also quite frightening for her – in a matter of fact, she probably wasn’t that scared because you were there; but even that didn’t help much. Not when both of you had no idea what was going on.

“I hate the fact they took my weapons. I’m thinking of a thousand ways to get out of here, but I can’t do it without at least my sword.” You rested your head on one of your hands, looking completely defeated. Kyrie had pity in her eyes, sitting by your side right after.

“Well… This isn’t exactly the sort of wedding dress I would choose either.” She sighed in desolation making you snort a quick laugh. “I’m not comfortable in this. I can only imagine how naked you feel.”

“Don’t tell me about it…” You rolled your eyes, pointing at your own attire. You and Kyrie looked positively ridiculous: it was as if the demon in charge of your clothes had only seen a bunch of 80’s movies depicting marriages and thought they had to be even more over the top than that. You could barely move in your own clothes and hated every single second of being in that thing. “If I at least had my gun, I’d shoot the bastard who thought this was acceptable.”

Kyrie had to giggle. It was always endearing to see how some of Vergil’s mannerisms spilled into yours over the time and vice versa. Your voice was as sharp as a piece of ice and your eyes had the same predatorial gaze – even if your words sounded funny in context.

“Couldn’t you use your summoned swords? Like Vergil?”

“I could but I shouldn’t.” Your answer was a little slow, because you were considering it. Using summoned swords was always an advantage, but it did come with its limitations. “Vergil is teaching me how to use all his arcane knowledge, little by little… But I’m human.” As you looked at Kyrie, she seemed to immediately understand what you meant: after all, she was the human companion of a half-demon as well. “It takes a lot of energy. Vergil can tap into his demonic energy that, honestly, it can power a whole city when he’s in the right mood. When it comes to me, though, I can only go so far. It takes a lot more concentration and I can do it only for a while – I’m a novice at it even, so I can’t hold it for too long. I need to train a lot more to be able to take an entire mission, for example.”

“Hmmm. It’s just like when Nero trains me with Credo’s sword…” Kyrie mumbled, resting her head on both of her hands, while her elbows leaned on her knees. You had to giggle: she looked like a bummed out child. “It’s so heavy, I can only do a couple of moves and I get tired quickly.”

“Is that why you’ve been training strength at the gym recently…?” You couldn’t stop yourself from smiling. There was something of sweet about that.

Your little angel was soon going to become a buffed little angel waving a big ass sword around. You loved that concept. Nero’s jaw would hit the floor.

“Exactly.” But Kyrie had the most angelic of smiles on her lips. You knew how it was important to her to be able to use Credo’s sword, even if it was just to protect herself and the children of the orphanage – she was never going to become a devil hunter like you. But she was going to be a guardian angel… Like Credo would’ve been if Sanctus hadn’t taken him away in that demonic cult in Fortuna.

Before you could say anything else, though, you felt a shift in the air. Furrowing your brows, you immediately got up from your seat and put yourself in front of Kyrie: whatever it was, it would have to go through you first. She didn’t say a word, seeming to hide behind you and that horrid thing you were wearing – which didn’t really work, seeing how evident her own dress was.

With a few sparks, one of the demon lords spawned right in front of you: Erlach.

“Everything seems to be ready for the ceremony, then. Good.” His smile spread across his leathery skin as a row of a thousand sharp knives. Erlach carried horns and claws, eyes with desolation and the fiery pits of his home, and a set of large wings fit for an overgrown bat – but something about his features were astoundingly human. Demon lords could tower over humans, sometimes even taller than doors, and carry all the might and horror of Hell, but their kind were built in resemblance with their mortal peers – which wasn’t very common when it came to demons.

“When you force your guests to take part in it, things do get ready at your will, demon.” You had that typical coldness in your eyes – the type that would make the will of a lesser demon waiver. It wasn’t the case with Erlach, though: a spark seemed to have crossed his eyes, as he stared at you for a few seconds with interest.

“Apologize being so rude, but I do think you wouldn’t have come this far out of free will, human.” He spat back, allowing a smile to take over his features once more. It wasn’t the most inviting thing you had ever seen, you had to be honest.

“With this sort of attire, I certainly wouldn’t have.”

To your surprise, Erlach laughed in response. You quickly shared a glare with Kyrie, both of you uneasy with such… Tolerance from him.

“I might have to agree with you. Now, come. I wish to speak to you in private – we have enough to discuss.”

*

Before you could even respond, you blinked and suddenly, you were in an old study. Probably a part of the cathedral that only priests had access, with private rooms where they could make their own little libraries and studies – the desk had books and documents all over it, the fire was lit and a thousand candles burned in orange to give light to one of the deepest nights of the year.

You tried not to sigh: demonic teleportation was always a nuisance to you. Your human body still had to get used to that and you always got a little angry at Vergil when he void teleported you with Yamato: he was wise to always ask your permission first and, if it happened during an emergency and it was the only thing available for him to protect you, he knew he was in for some serious complaining from your part later.

Honestly, Vergil would rather have you safe, complaining at him and as mad as a human could be than have you harmed in a place he couldn’t protect you. He was actually getting well versed in dealing with your void teleportation complaints.

“Your kind isn’t very prone to conversations.” You had to point out, taking a deep breath. Your dizziness would be gone in a few seconds and you didn’t want Erlach to know how much it affected you. “Mindless dismemberments and self-boasting talk seem to be the preferred route for demons.”

“Lesser demons. Demon lords do have a different approach to things… And deals.” Erlach walked around his table, skimming over some documents before turning his fiery eyes to you and smiling once more. “The brainless dismembering style is still preferred by some, though. Like Orcus.”

“The second demon lord here tonight.” As you noted, Erlach seemed to have enjoyed your answer. It meant you were paying attention, not only trying to escape. “Demons are quite selfish as well, I wouldn’t expect to see your kind engaging in alliances. Or is that something peculiar to demon lords as well…?”

Yes, you were trying to provoke him – it was in your fighting style, in your blood. When fighting against demons, they all boasted how terrible they were, how they would smash you into a paste on the pavement and feast on your bones. You had to know how to answer at the same level or the fear would get to you. After all, you were fighting against supernatural things on a daily basis, obviously faster and stronger than you. If you didn’t taunt them to inspire a little bit of fear and belittle them before your humanity, you would cower in a corner and wait for certain death.

It was something Vergil admired on you, though. You had everything to fear those you fought against – and, sometimes, you knew you were overpowered by them. Even so, you wouldn’t allow that to show, you would masterfully control your emotions and only let out those you allowed your enemies to see. Vergil was quite proud of that.

“It’s peculiar to those of us who rather use our minds instead of our powers.” Erlach’s eyes lost all interest they had on the documents and were immediately glued to you and you only. Not once you shifted your gaze, and not once your body seemed to want to run away. You just stood there, immobile, gazing back at his fiery eyes with the same conviction as his – waiting the rest of his answer. “You see, I could break your bones with the flick of my wrist, but that wouldn’t be so fun, would it…?” Erlach approached with a slight smile on his lips, some fun playing in his words. His steps were slow and calculated, everything he could to inspire fear in your human heart. “There’s so much more in this world than bending it to your will by force.”

“It is a lot easier. Or so did Mundus think.” You crossed your arms and slightly raised your head, failing to notice how arrogant you looked… Just like Vergil used to be. Dante said one day both of you would get your ass kicked for looking cocky and, well, your day might have arrived. You wouldn’t let your pride slip out of you, tough, and something about Erlach’s demeanor made you think he wasn’t really annoyed by it. His feelings were… Something else.

“It didn’t take him too far, did it…?” Erlach raised one of his eyebrows, slowly approaching you once again. He looked like a predator ready to pounce on his pray, but instead of running, you maintained your posture. The one the Dark Slayer taught you. The one from knowing the power of being tied to the blood of Sparda. “Mundus was arrogant to think humans were only meat.”

“Apparently we are unwilling wedding participants too.” You scoffed, making Erlach laugh in response. You had to hide how his reaction took you by surprise: how much did you have to taunt him for that demon lord to finally lose his temper? “I don’t suppose you brought me here only to properly propose to me.”

“Differently from the Spardas, I do believe in taking some things by force.” Erlach’s voice had a delight laced in his words that made you… Slightly uncomfortable. “The ritual is taking place tonight, whether you and your friend agree to it or not. I just wanted to look into your eyes and see what the son of Sparda, the Dark Slayer who had been locked in Hell for decades, saw in you. A bond between a demon and any mortal creature isn’t one to be taken lightly.”

“Well, then you aren’t in luck. I am not married to Vergil, nor do I think he will ever want to be.” Your answer was certain and, to the demon’s surprise, carried no tinge of bitterness. You and Vergil had an agreement regarding your relationship: he would be with you for as long as you would have him, but he would never think of binding you to his fate like his father did to his mother. You had said countless times you didn’t mind and you weren’t afraid, but it wasn’t something Vergil was ready for. And you could respect that. “Our bond is not what you think it is.”

“Oh, it is exactly what I think it is.” Erlach’s words carried a truth you feared you weren’t able to see at the moment – as if he knew something you didn’t. You had to control your feelings not to furrow your brows and allow him to see your confusion, hiding it under your unbothered and strong demeanor – like whatever words he said could never affect you. “It isn’t a ceremonial bond, but one of souls. The heart does not lie, my exquisite guest, and the Spardas seem to be haunted by their father’s heartful curse.” His fingers grasped an old piece of paper in one of the desks by your side; Erlach’s indifferent eyes analyzed its contents while he spoke. “I will never understand why Sparda decided not to follow our rituals. He could’ve been great; Greater than Mundus himself. But he chose to diminish and turn himself as human as he could be… and look at what happened to him and his family. A shame, really.” He tossed aside the paper, and you could see an old picture of Sparda and Eva, falling apart from how old it was. Probably cut out from a book, looking like a painting; a portrait made long ago, before Dante and Vergil were even born. “Our marriage is called a binding ritual. It requires two souls to connect, and it makes one of them more powerful than one could ever dream of.”

“Hmmm. It requires one to diminish itself and be a powerless servant, then. I can see why Sparda discarded this option.” He would’ve never done such a thing to Eva, and that you had learned from all the stories Vergil told you from his parents. If you had only known the story from the books and popular tales, you would’ve asked yourself the same thing and have the same questions Erlach had – but you did have Sparda’s own son to tell the story. To paint you how his father was warm, stern, yes, but still kind, graceful and loving… To paint him as human. In all his adoration for Eva, he would never think of turning her into a powerless slave to his will. That was not what love was. “You still have much to learn.”

Erlach’s fiery eyes immediately met yours – but they didn’t carry the offense you thought they would. There was something else inside his demonic eyes. Was it… Excitement? Maybe…?

“Oh, little human, you have much to learn then to think some wouldn’t appreciate being slaves to their partner’s will. It is all a matter of pleasure.” His smile, though, immediately made you uncomfortable. If that subject had been mentioned by Vergil, you would definitely answer with a sassy smile and state that, in a matter of fact, you did know about that – and see where that conversation with your devilish partner would get you. But with Erlach…? It sounded more like a warning rather than anything else. Definitely a red flag waving in front of you. “The other soul does get something in return – some very important things in Hell: protection and status. Desecrating the partner of one of the most powerful demons to ever live could easily be a death sentence to whatever demon foolish enough to do so.”

“If that is the case, and I am bonded to Vergil, I wonder how foolish you have to be to willingly kidnap and forcefully wed the partner of the King of Hell.”

You wouldn’t admit it out loud. You wouldn’t even say it in front of Dante and Nero. Whenever the subject decided to appear, you just nodded, agreeing with the others that what Vergil did was horrifying and terribly wrong.

But you couldn’t deny the power trip on the rare occasions you decided to flex Vergil’s King of Hell title.

It had its perks.

“Only foolish if I don’t finish the ritual in time, my little human. I was also careful enough to find myself some leverage.” Erlach immediately waved at the door, referring to Kyrie. You didn’t want to sigh in acknowledgement, but that was enough to at least try to put some halt in Vergil’s murderous rampage. Or to make Nero hold his father on a leash if Vergil just decided to recklessly kill everything on sight. You had some serious concerns those demons heavily understated Vergil’s power. “I had no intentions to let Orcus partake in this ritual but I did need a brute to carry out most of the killing; it would be terribly boring.” With those words, Erlach approached enough to stop right in front of you. At any moment you flinched or decided to walk back, even if everything in your being wanted to put some very good distance between the both of you. Preferably a Vergil of distance. “Therefore, he can bind himself to the weakest of partners. The grandson of Sparda clearly isn’t as attuned to power as Sparda’s spawns.”

“Only a demon would think a human heart is weaker than a devil’s will.” You scoffed in response, raising your head once even higher – in part to be able to look at Erlach directly in his eyes. Vergil’s gaze could cut like the sharpest of ice, and you had seen those silvery eyes in their worst. Erlach’s gaze was nothing compared to the Dark Slayer. “Maybe that was the source of Sparda’s power, have you ever thought of that?”

You would never throw a demon lord like Erlach at Kyrie, but you were quite certain he wouldn’t appreciate the truth to your words and would never turn to the crew’s little angel as the most powerful of partners. Demons could be quite predictable in your book.

“Hmmm. Maybe humans measure their status through empathy, but in Hell…” Erlach’s eyes leveled with yours, his head bowing to be able to share his gaze with you – and, instead of fear, he found something else… Something closer to pride. You were the counterpart of the King of Hell after all, weren’t you? You would never bow your head and lose your crown, Erlach was beginning to understand that. And appreciate that. “We measure through power. And you carry quite the power within you, dearest human. Vergil, the Son of Sparda, wouldn’t accept any less with all the titles he carries. He is part demon, after all.”

That was some food for thought that had never crossed your mind before. Yes, Vergil was partly human, but without a doubt, it was Dante who got most of Eva’s heart. Vergil always took pride in his demonic heritage and power, and always found solace in that – he slowly came to terms with his own humanity and learned to appreciate the human heart, but the thirst for power ran deep in his demonic veins. He did see something in you more than your human empathy… Or else, his devil would never consider bowing to you.

“Hmmm. If all you search is power then, you can always betray Orcus and perform the ritual only for yourself.” You had a spark of sharp intelligence in your eyes, making Erlach widen his smile as the words poured from your lips. “Surely a creature like you wouldn’t mind some backstabbing and murder to keep all the power to yourself.”

“Oh, my sweet temptation, I have to say, I love the way you think…!” Now his voice had a trail of smoldering lust that not even you could deny it was there. Yes, you were trying to manipulate the demon into killing Orcus and leaving only one demon lord for you to deal with – which would make your life quite easy – and probably releasing Kyrie while at it. But you never expected your little game to backfire so gloriously: perhaps Vergil was right when he said you still had a thing or two to learn about his kind. “And I know what you are trying to do – very exciting. A battle of wits and manipulation with a devil, you are truly fearless.” You didn’t think Erlach couldn’t approach you even more, but there he was, towering over you in a way you could almost feel his hot breath on your face. Even if you wanted to void-teleport Vergil right between you at that very moment, you wouldn’t back down – it wasn’t in you. “When all this started, I thought only to bond with a powerful creature of human blood – now… You have proven to be spellbounding, sweet sweet creature. I see what Vergil saw in you: all the cleverness, might, strength, wits; all that fire.” With those words, Erlach offered you his hand, with those fiery eyes staring inside your soul. “I will take you as my partner, but you can do it willingly. I will give you protection and you will be royalty in Hellish realms. You will rule by my side: everything we want is ours for the taking, and anything you ask, I will give you. Kingdoms, realms, worlds. Every living creature that has ever taken a breath will bow to us – the world is mine and yours to rule… You just have to say yes.”

Erlach’s words took you by surprise – your head spun and you thought soon your feet wouldn’t know how to keep you stable on the floor. Your plans backfiring was a serious understatement. You never gave Erlach a reason to like you: on the contraire, you only gave him reasons to be extremely annoyed and suspicious of any and all of your actions. He had no hidden agendas in his words, as far as you could see, and it was extremely obvious what was going on.

You just didn’t expect that to happen, out of all the outcomes of that night.

“Why would I do that when I am already royalty?” Your answer, though, came back with the icy stare you learned from your beloved blue devil, crossing your arms once more and raising your head high just like he used to do. It wasn’t something you did consciously – with time, people develop some mannerisms of their loved ones, and you were no different.

You just got Vergil’s arrogance – and you were more than ready to pay for your tongue. That little game between you and Erlach had already gone too far: you had spotted a few things in the room you could use as a weapon and you were ready to go feral if he attacked you because of your insolence.

You were disarmed, though, when Erlach started laughing – a laugh of pure delight.

“I will have to steal, then. Just like Paris did to Helen of Troy.”

“But remember: an entire kingdom burned just so that King Menelaus could have Helen of Sparta back.”

“Indeed, Beautiful Helen. I shall keep that in mind.” With those words, Erlach’s rough hands took one of yours by force and placed a sharp kiss on your soft skin – that seemed to burn like a lingering fire even after you were teleported back to your improvised cell.

You had to sit down. You had to sit down. That night was already becoming quite the ride – and you thought your Halloween nights couldn’t be even wilder than the ones you had already had so far. But there you were, proven wrong, by a demon lord with a crazy ancient ritual that required a demonic marriage. You were flabbergasted, shocked, breathless… And a little scared.

Vergil had always warned you not to play with demons – especially with those who were witty enough to answer at your level. You always thought he warned you so you could dodge being fooled and trapped into a deal you never saw coming in the first place – he never told you one of those creatures could develop feelings towards you.

“Y/n? Are you ok?!” Kyrie rushed towards you, sitting by your side on that bench you were before, checking your temperature. You were still staring at some lost point on the ground, clearly questioning your life choices so far. “Y/n! Did he hurt you?! What happened?!”

“I think one of the most absurd things just happened in this lifetime…” You murmured, finally staring back at her with a concerned look – but somewhat empty eyes. Kyrie just had her eyebrows furrowed, because if something worried you then she should be even more worried. “I think a demon lord just fell in love with me.”

“Ooooh, no…” The dread in Kyrie’s voice could be understood by even the most clueless of creatures. She closed her eyes, already foreseeing chaos and destruction. “Vergil is going to go on a rampage.”

Yes. And, honestly, you weren’t looking forward to that.

*

“I know we are in a hurry…!” Lady was leaning out the open door of the Devil May Cry van while Nico drove furiously right behind Dante’s trail. Screaming at the red devil while on the road wasn’t an easy – nor safe – task, but honestly, Lady had done worse. “But what are you trying to do, cowboy?! Not miss the train?!”

Dante immediately slowed down slightly, just so he could be side by side with the devil hunter he knew since his teen years. Looking up at her, Dante didn’t even have to watch the road to keep on going without running over anything – his demonic insight would make up for that.

“Kinda, Lady.” His answer was a little snarky, even if he didn’t want to. “Hey, kid! How are your instincts with your girl?!”

“Not good, I’ll tell ya that.” Nero growled, almost unable to stand still by Nico’s side. The gunsmith had made a mental note not to bother him through that whole evening: Nero’s fangs were already showing, his eyes had a tinge of gold, and his trigger distortion was already appearing in his voice. If she actually took some time to look at him, she would be able to see claws instead of nails and his hair a little bit longer than usual – almost like they were back in Fortuna. Nico still wasn’t used to half-triggered Nero and she could bet it would take some time. “Kyrie’s heart, she’s anxious. Somethin’s unsettling her. And I don’t like it. At all.”

With those words, Nero finished doing whatever he was doing with Red Queen and his sword clicked back into place, revving up with the engines he had installed long ago.

“If the kid is like that, imagine Vergil.” Dante stated back to Lady and Trish, now leaning by the open door completely unbothered by the speed and the wind. “He’s an idiot, but still, man’s got enough power to level a whole city. He’s an asshat who can control his feelings, alright, but he’s got one hell of a trauma and a thing for protecting. His partner is gone. He’s on a bloodlust rampage, trust me. We gotta get to this place before Vergil, or all hell will break lose.”

“Vergil’s our train. Got it.” Lady immediately turned serious, remembering all the times she had ever seen Vergil fight – and all he could do.

“Nico! Hit the gas pedal! We aren’t gonna get there in time going at this speed.” Trish strutted over the driver’s seat – always keeping an eye on Nero. She knew how half-triggers could be disorienting and dangerous, and she could help in case anything went wrong – after all, she was a full devil and, wanting or not, she could take down Nero in a fight, to some extent, if she ever had to. At least long enough to give Dante time to fight his nephew in a fit of rage.

“Already goin’ as fast as I can, demon lady!” Nico had her cigarette between her teeth and her foot never leaving the gas pedal. Indeed, it was the fastest speed for the van.

“We just gotta give it a spark, then.” With those words, Trish rested one of her hands on the van’s panel, her eyes immediately sparkling with thunderous yellow. Her demonic sparks ran through her body, pooling over her heart and running down her arm, jolting to the van and enveloping it on her signature yellow lighting.

“WOOOOAH!” Nico had to hold her cigarette even tighter, both hands on the wheel as the van seemed to fly on the road. “Are you CRAZY, woman?!”

“Keep your eyes on the road, virtuosa.” And Trish’s own glowing yellow eyes never left the streets. “We’ll make it there on time.”

“That’s what I’m talkin’ about!” Dante couldn’t help but laugh and use part of his own trigger to make Cavaliere go faster, now side by side with the van. “Keep it up, babe!”

They had to make it before Vergil. Dante knew in his heart he was the only one who could speak some logic back to his brother at a moment like that.

*

“Me and Vergil… We have a thing.”

You and Kyrie were being taken to the main event of the night: the ritual at the center of the derelict cathedral, under the light of the moon and the stars, witnessed by demons and the lost souls on the forgotten cemetery nearby. Barely any stained-glass mosaics were left – but those that were gave the cathedral an eerie tinge of color; like ghosts long gone in a place that was once holy. Your steps echoed on the stony ground, and you could hear the crackling of an enormous bonfire in the distance – as well as see the distorted, tall shadows of the demons taking both of you to your doom.

“I’m not saying it’s a good thing. I’m just saying it’s a thing.” You sighed, making her hazelnut eyes stare at you with interest as you walked proudly in front of her. The demons forced Kyrie to walk and kept shoving her until you made them only escort you to the ritual with just a stare of authority – she had to admit, you and Vergil were very much alike in some departments. “I can… Sense him sometimes. And he can sense me, whenever he wants to. It has to do with the arcane studies and the fact that we are partners.” You remained silent for a few seconds, closing your eyes for a while to take a deep breath before opening them again. “He can feel my distress. He knows when I’m worried, anxious, in danger.”

“Hmmm… Nero can do that too… I wonder if it’s a family thing.” Kyrie whispered back, not wanting the other demons to hear your conversation. You kept as close to her as possible, but still walking in front of her: if anything happened, it had better happen to you first.

“I wonder the same, too.” You answered with a breathy laugh, seeing the beauty of Vergil’s son being so alike him sometimes – and you wondered if Sparda had the same with Eva; with your heart already knowing the answer. “Sometimes, I feel Vergil’s rage too. His despair. His loneliness. His pain.” You went silent for a while, not really wanting to elaborate on that. It was the first time you were talking about that to someone on the crew – the first time you told Vergil, you had no idea what to do with those emotions and to say it was a roller coaster of a night to both of you, was an understatement. “What I feel is only a shadow of what he feels. And when he feels me, there is no force on Earth that will stop him. He will find me and, if need be, obliterate whatever is causing me trouble.”

“Oh.”

Kyrie finally understood why you said that wasn’t necessarily a good thing. When it came to her and Nero, their connection was deep and strong – and she had never seen anything like that before. But, the way you were speaking, it was different with you and Vergil… Maybe even stronger. And, when it came to Vergil, that could be for good or for bad.

You had to wonder how it was with Eva and Sparda. He was a demon, after all, and she was human. If Vergil was already that protective towards you, and that ruthless when it came to his enemies, you could see Sparda destroying entire countries for the woman he loved – being a harbinger of nothing but death, ruin and despair, only to have her feeling safe in his arms once again.

The fall of the city of Troy never made so much sense to you before that moment. Even if in the original story Helen’s heart was taken by Paris, still, Menelaus burned, killed, maimed and destroyed everything in his way just so she could be Helen of Sparta again… You could see Vergil and his father doing the same – but, in yours and Eva’s case, you would be longing to be back into their arms once more.

“Vergil is coming. And he is not in his best shape, emotionally speaking.” You whispered back to Kyrie so she could understand the extent of the situation you were in. “What I just felt, I could kill one of these demons with my bare hands. When Vergil’s here, he will do his best not to hurt you, but he is focused in one thing only so… Get out of his way. And I’m not trying to be rude…”

“I understand.” Kyrie whispered back, carefully noticing the demons eyeing each other. She knew you weren’t really giving her a warning, you were playing a little game: planting seeds of terror and discord so they would tear each other apart from the inside just from being afraid of Vergil. It was a clever move and Kyrie would’ve praised you if she had the chance. “I’ve already seen Nero almost go on a rampage. It really isn’t nice. I hope he doesn’t try to join his father, or there will not be a single rock left standing in this cathedral soon enough.”

She decided to play your game, noticing a slight smile of approval on the corner of your lips. All of you hunters always had smart strategies to deal with the demons you did on a daily basis, but, when you were completely stripped of your weapons just like on that moment, you had to resort to other ways of fighting.

Your scheming had to be put to a halt for a while when you approached the decaying wooden doors that opened your path down the church’s aisle – a moth eaten dark red carpet, now almost black from dirt and time, painting the path you should follow; until you would stand side by side with the devil who kidnapped you, now waiting for your presence by a tall bonfire at the center of the cathedral, illuminating an altar right behind Erlach.

Things suddenly seemed even more serious now and your heart sunk in your chest. As you started to walk down the aisle, the demons watching that hellish ceremony chanted and hit their weapons or claws rhythmically on the stony floor. Kyrie was held by one of the demons who guided you towards the aisle, outside of that madness, but soon to go in after your ritual came to an end – after you got married.

A few seconds after your heart seemed to have sunken on the floor, you felt a rage bubbling inside your chest, threatening to come out of your mouth with an earth shattering scream; running through your body like a violent bolt of lightning, resting on your hands that immediately closed to fists as you raised your head high: for a split second, if you saw anything that could be used as a weapon to cut Erlach’s head off its neck, you would’ve taken it and plunged in like a furious beast.

That lightning, though, dissipated as fast as it ran through your body. You didn’t lose your posture and kept walking with certain, hard steps towards your fate – but that blind bloody rage was gone.

It was Vergil.

You knew it was him. It was right after you had that desperate, desolating feeling of not knowing what to do, of watching that harrowing scene right in front of you and not knowing how to get out… Of feeling trapped like a little mouse on a cage. You felt some of Vergil’s emotions in a very fleeting manner – in a bolt of lightning – but he could feel yours more certainly and longingly. That bloodthirst that ran through your body… It was just a fleeting taste of Vergil’s emotional response to knowing how unsafe you felt.

After all he had been through, protection was a big thing for your blue devil. He silently promised nothing would ever happen to his newfound family now that he was strong enough to protect not only himself, but everyone around him. Knowing you were vulnerable, completely exposed, feeling like prey and he wasn’t around to keep you safe… To say Vergil’s demonic blood was boiling was a great understatement.

“Come, brilliant creature among humans. Midnight is close, and the ritual must be completed.” Erlach offered you his rough, devilish hand so you could take and approach the altar with him – a stone containing a couple of candles and an old golden bow, marked by ancient, dry blood.

You stopped right where you were, not taking his hand, but still staring into his eyes. You were thinking of words of defiance, of improvised weapons, of anything you could do to get you and Kyrie out of there. If you had to fight that demon with hands and teeth, so be it, but you wouldn’t back down – and if it was for you to die, you would die fighting.

Your thoughts were interrupted by a roaring thunder rumbling through the pitch-black skies right above your heads. You couldn’t see any clouds and it didn’t seem like it was going to rain earlier that day, but that ominous thunder roared once more – with a flash of a lightning in the distance cracking down from the sky suddenly illuminating your face as you opened a broad smile. Erlach only eyed you with confusion, taken aback by the sudden prelude of rain.

“A storm is approaching.” Your somber voice did not match the smile across your lips and Erlach’s eyes filled with understanding – even if he himself didn’t think that was possible for only a half-demon like the Dark Slayer. “You have yet time to give up this foolishness before he arrives.”

“I am not scared by a little thunder, human. You shall learn that in time.” The demon decided to ignore the warning on your voice, taking your hand with a little too much strength, already guiding you to the altar.

But you heard whispers – among the other demons, yours and Kyrie's words were being replicated, some of them resting silent while others laughed. With your ominous warning over a simple storm, though, they started to wander… To fear. Was that something done by your lover? Was that the extent of Sparda’s power? The Dark Slayer, the one who escaped from Hell and from his imprisonment by none other than Mundus, was that powerful…? They didn’t know. And some of them, didn’t want to find out.

“Oh, you will learn to be scared.” You whispered, back, slowly going up the few steps that kept you and Erlach far from each other. He conducted you with an iron grip, while the only thing you had in mind was to buy Vergil more time to get to you. “As all of you do.”

“Not if I get the ritual done first.” With those harsh words, Erlach gripped your arm in a way you couldn’t escape, even if his gestures were a lot more flourished than brute. You saw a ritualistic dagger in his other hand and you knew what the next step would be. “Then he shall learn a thing or two about fear.”

His hands moved so fast you didn’t have time to quip back – even if you wanted to answer that, after all Vergil had been through, making him feel fear was quite the achievement. Very few things could frighten his heart and soul… And you were oblivious enough to point out that, Vergil’s protective and enraged response that day was not only out of love, but out of fear of losing you.

Before Erlach could resume cutting your hand to harvest your blood for the bonding ritual, you managed to pierce his arm with a white summoned sword. With that surprise, Erlach dropped the weapon and you took it in your hand – twisting it and approaching him enough to press it against his neck, already making him bleed. You just didn’t manage to kill him because his survival reflexes made him snap our of his surprise and hold your hand against his neck, struggling with you in order to see who would win: you, by taking his life, or him, by taking you as his.

“My King of Hell isn’t the only one who should be feared, demon. You will learn that with time.” Your voice was low and filled with pride, hearing as the other demons immediately started whispering to each other: Orcus and Erlach probably didn’t tell them all the titles your lover carried.

As if to support you, another thunder roared in the skies and a lightning cracked near the desecrated cathedral. Some demons seemed to gasp and become startled, expecting Vergil to emerge from the shadows at any moment.

A few drops of water started to fall on your hair, your face, and run down your hands… And between your lips as you smiled.

“You are indeed a rare one.” But, to your surprise, Erlach smiled back. His sharp nails buried in the skin of your arm holding the knife, making you relax your grip ever so slightly as blood started to run from the wounds he inflicted. “Blood is blood. No matter how I attain it. Alas, I wanted our bonding to be beautiful, but this will do.”

With your blood running down his claws, Erlach grasped the blade on his neck, cutting his own hand even if you didn’t let the dagger go. Reaching out for the golden bowl, you once again tried to stab his neck, but the demon finally let go of your other arm only to hold your hand back. As you both struggled, you did your best to keep his hand away from the bowl, with Erlach already muttering some words in a language long lost to your human ears.

It was your blood already mixed with his. Whatever you did, he couldn’t reach that bowl for anything in this world.

You didn’t notice when the rain became stronger. You didn’t notice when Orcus moved Kyrie away from the door. You didn’t notice when the thunders seemed to roar inside the earth beneath your feet. All your strength was concentrated in keeping Erlach away from the altar, and all his strength was focused on completing the ritual on time.

“Before me all things create were none, save things Eternal, and Eternal I shall endure.*” Oh, you would recognize that voice even if you were dead. The words creeped through the stone walls of the cathedral, accompanied by calm, calculated steps approaching with resolve. The demons’ attentions turned to the rotten door, as well as yours and Erlach’s eyes, finally stopping to struggle. Vergil’s silhouette finally made itself visible, as if he was taken by a cold blue aura in the darkness – his silvery eyes set on you and your foe, one of his hands grasping the hilt of the Yamato as the other kept the sword safe at his side. “Per aspera, ad Inferi.”

There was a change in the air. Your very breath seemed to warp around you as time became slurred and thick. For a few moments it was difficult to breathe, as the storm outside that desecrated place looked like it would start bleeding inside the cathedral. You stumbled back, closer to the altar, dragging Erlach with you – you knew what was coming. Some demons tried to run, others froze in place, while some got ready to fight.

You could see how that cold, fiery blue started to cut the air – a split second before Vergil disappeared and all you could hear was the sound of the Yamato slicing everything in sight. Time stopped for a while, your breath disappeared from your lungs, your heart didn’t beat. You held yourself together as strongly as you could, while Erlach stared at that view with a pair of impressed – or maybe even fearful – eyes.

Vergil appeared once more, now standing a few meters away from you – all he had to do was climb the steps to finally reach you. Placing Yamato in its sheath, Vergil took a few long seconds to get the shiny blade to slide down and, with a click, make most of the demons – and whatever decoration that was left standing – fall apart in piles of flesh and blood.

You didn’t want to say you had warned them, but well… You had warned them.

“You’re too late, Dark Slayer.” With those words, Erlach reached the bowl – now even closer than before, since you dragged him back not to be so close to a judgement cut of that magnitude. His words were like a bell, waking you up to the reality that a single drip of your mixed blood in the gold, and it would all be over.

But Vergil unsheathed Yamato once again, as fast as he moved down the aisle to reach you, and the golden bowl was cut in half – cracking in some places, gold dust spilling at your feet.

“You should learn, demon, some things can never be taken by force.” Vergil’s voice was like a velvety murmur in the dark – and you knew, the quieter he grew, the more time he had to marinate his anger. “Love, is one of them. Respect, is another.”

Those silvery eyes finally landed on yours, as a faint smile spread across your lips. Love would be nothing without respect, and Vergil argued that earning your respect was one of the most honorable things you could have graced him with – not that the love was not of importance, but if you had never come to respect him, the love you shared would have never flourished… And the reciprocate was true.

“Well, well, looks like we’ve arrived in time.” You heard Dante sighing by the door, guns already on his hands. “Big bad demon is all yours, Verge. We’ll handle things back here.”

“Kyrie!” And you barely saw Nero as he ran towards Orcus with all the rage of the world in his eyes, slicing demons in the way with a revved up Red Queen and leaving a trail of fire behind him. Sometimes he was a lot like his own father, but other times, his uncle's heritage shined through.

Vergil didn’t even look back at the crew already killing the demons who fought and who tried to run away – he only had eyes for you and the filthy creature holding you in its arms.

“Last time I saw you, my whips cracked on that soft skin of yours, spawn of Sparda.” And for the first time that night, you heard some more emotion on Erlach’s voice – something close to hate. Maybe he wasn’t as controlled as he said he was… Maybe he was prone to violence after all. “You tried your best to hold back your tears as your filthy blood tainted the floors of Hell. But everything cracks, eventually.”

A jolt of pain burned across your skin on your back as if you were naked, as fast as a bolt of lightning. You couldn’t help but to wince at the feeling, even if Vergil and Erlach remained immobile. In a fraction of a second, you understood a little of that pain, of a memory in the back of Vergil’s head that came back like a kick in the stomach, and it seemed not to affect him at all – but you knew, you could feel what he didn’t show.

The pain was fleeting, but the anger wasn’t – that was yours and yours only. As you suddenly flinched, you took advantage of that moment of surprise to move your arms once again and the strength of your boiling anger to slash Erlach as you could, eager to take a piece of him… Eager to kill him after the suffering he put your lover through.

“Everything cracks indeed.” You murmured as he took one of his hands to his face, noticing the considerable gash you opened on his cracked skin – now pouring blood profusely. “Next, I will cut your tongue.”

You heard a quick chuckle from Vergil, silvery eyes observing you with so much pride – and a little of something else. Pride was always easy to see in him: the way he carried himself, the way he posed with his head high, the way his eyes admired that which he respected and loved… But care was a different thing. If you were looking at your lover, it would take you some time to notice, but his admiration for you was never ending behind his pride to be able to call you his.

“I do understand how you came to love this human, that I will admit.” Erlach hissed back at Vergil, licking his own blood from his fingers. Risking a glance at the cathedral, the demon assessed the situation: the bowl was broken, the demons were all but destroyed, fleeing from the weapons of Dante, Lady and Trish, Nero had Kyrie back in his arms and Orcus was nowhere to be seen. “I truly underestimated the depth of your feelings for such a fragile creature.”

“Eloquent words, but no wisdom behind them.” Vergil’s response was prideful as always, as he walked the small set of steps to reach you – and probably slice Erlach apart. “Fragile is far from what I would use to describe y/n. I will burn bridges, destroy cities, crush entire empires to protect those whom I love and respect. There is nothing of fragile in that.” Pointing Yamato at Erlach, the blade almost touched the wound you inflicted in the demon’s neck. “You should remember that as I kill you for this insolence, pitiful scum.”

His stern eyes glinted with a tint of blue, as Vergil’s teeth were already sharp in fangs. His hands around the Yamato already started to resemble claws and his voice, even if you would love it in all of its iterations, had that distinct demonic distortion. His blue fire engulfed him like a faint shadow, but it did make your lover look even taller than he already was. On the brink of his humanity, it would take only a spark to make him burst into his demonic form.

“King of Hell.” You mouthed at Erlach while pointing at Vergil right in front of you, as if to prove a point – the point you wanted to prove from the beginning: no matter what those demons did, Vergil was stronger and more powerful than all of them together.

And, of course, you could use another rush of power whenever you flexed that title. You just hoped no one else in the crew would see it: you’d be in for some harsh judgement if they did.

“I shall remember for the next time we meet, son of Sparda.” Erlach turned his fiery eyes to you. “And I shall see you again, brilliant Helen.”

With those words, the demon used its own blood for an incantation to flee a battle he would definitely lose – a smart move, even if you didn’t know where he went… And if that ominous warning was not something you would have wanted to hear. You would prefer to see him dead.

“Hmmm… Bold of this creature to assume it could steal your love like foolish Paris.” Vergil had to murmur under his breath, immediately turning around to face you, Yamato quickly back on its sheath. Before you could say anything, Vergil took your hand in his with a surprising gentle touch, only so he could analyze the bloody scratches on your arm – as well as allow his silver eyes to burn with wrath. “Are you hurt anywhere else?”

“No, that’s the only wound. You don’t need to worry, Vergil.” Your answer, though, made his eyes fly to look into yours as if you had said one of the most jarring things he had ever heard.

“I will always worry about you. You know that.”

He didn’t have to say, you could feel it. You had felt his worrying ever since he had learned it was Erlach who kidnapped you and wanted to complete that mad bonding ritual. Vergil’s worry was in his fear of losing whatever love he managed to have in that godforsaken life of his, and that usually manifested in an unparalleled anger in him. All that wrath… It was one of the highest praises you could ever get from your lover.

Placing both of your hands to cradle his face, you didn’t allow Vergil to keep on speaking as you pressed your lips against his. It was one of the most effective ways you could rest that flame inside his heart and bring him some peace – the same way the droplets of rain seemed to want to wash away all the blood and fury of that night. It took him a couple of seconds to start melting under your touch, arms wrapping around your waist and bringing you closer to his body, as your kiss quieted the fear that burned inside his heart.

You parted from his lips, even if Vergil himself didn’t seem to want to do so. His breathing, though, was already going back to a normal pace and you couldn’t feel his fangs under your lips anymore. As those silvery eyes stared back at you, the blue tinges were gradually gone. You took your hands to his hair, taking the rebellious strands that were already falling on his vision and brushing them back into his usual hairstyle – and Vergil even allowed himself to thank you with a soft smile.

“I cannot help but wonder, though…” He finally murmured, voice back to his dark tone with no traces of his demonic side showing up. “What, in the name of the gods, you are wearing.”

“Apparently, this hideous thing is what demons consider a wedding attire.” You sighed back, still in his embrace. You refused to look down and see yourself in that ridiculous thing again. “I wanted to get rid of it, but alas, the other option was to be completely naked.”

“Hmmm…” You didn’t know if Vergil hummed or growled, but you did know he was quite unpleased by that sight – almost as much as you. Taking your hand, Vergil guided you around the enormous bonfire behind the altar, in a place the crew couldn’t see you. “Don’t move.”

Before you could even ask what he had in mind, the air around you warped and your clothes fell on the ground after a quick and clean judgment cut.

That was a way to solve things, but…

“My clothes…”

Vergil immediately took off his coat, wrapping it around you and keeping you close, helping you dress it and hold it closed in front of you. It was a lot bigger than your form, and definitely a heavy piece of clothing, but it smelled like him – and that was one of the things that could always calm the distress in your heart.

“We will find your clothes. But you cannot walk around dressed like a clown.” With you still in his arms, Vergil placed a rather long kiss on your forehead, catching you by surprise.

A nice surprise that made you smile.

“On that, I agree with you. If we were ever to get married, I would have never worn such a thing.” You whispered back, making him chuckle while staring into your eyes again. Sometimes, the ice in his silver stare seemed to melt for a while, just like at that moment.

“You would be a beautiful sight to see.” His answer was also a whisper, and a rather unexpected one: that was something you never expected Vergil to say. He often mentioned how Sparda marrying Eva was a blessing to him and a curse to her, even if you insisted on arguing that probably wasn’t true; but you would never expect Vergil, of all people, would have imagined you on a wedding day… With him.

“Hey! Are you both makin’ out behind that bonfire? C’mon, it’s not time for that, Verge! Did mom never teach you to have manners?”

Dante’s voice interrupted whatever you could say in response, as Vergil already started to growl in annoyance at what his twin brother was implying. You headed back to the crew, twins ready to start bickering once again, as always. You saw Kyrie wearing Nero’s coat and couldn’t help but giggle – like father like son.

You sighed, finding Vergil’s fingers and entangling his between yours – his touch reciprocating immediately. It was time to go home.

*

“Your fingers are cold.”

Vergil held your hands close to him as you waited for the crew to drive back to the shop. Nico was smoking behind the wheel and you took some time to rest as everyone tried to find what the demons stole from you and Kyrie as well as where they found out about that binding ritual – or demonic marriage, as you began to enjoy calling it.

Your lover couldn’t stay away from you for too long, though. He came back after a little while, not wanting to admit he was too worried to leave you alone for more then a couple of minutes – even if you were with Nico.

He would argue if something bad happened, you would be the one doing the saving while Nico would be screaming around and trying to run demons over… And you couldn’t really disagree with him on that.

“Well, it’s part of my human condition.” You smiled back as Vergil had his mouth close to your hands, trying to warm them up with his breath. On the other hand, there was your blue devil, arms completely naked under his leather vest, oblivious to the weather. “I can’t keep myself warm while naked under a snowstorm like some.”

“Well, I cannot either.” Even if his eyes were a little harsh upon looking at you, there was also some amusement hidden underneath the ice. “Although I would survive enough to get you to safety.”

Vergil’s eyes went back to your hands while you kept on observing how he occupied himself with the task of warming you. His lips were close enough so you could feel them ghosting over your fingers, but never touching your skin. His rough hands cradled yours with a touch so gentle one would never expect from the likes of him. Everything about Vergil screamed danger, but when it came to you, it was completely opposite.

“I wished so bad you would find me.” You finally whispered, keeping your eyes close. Feelings weren’t easy for the both of you; somehow, you found that closing your eyes while being around only him was easier to allow your heart to open – and there were times Vergil did the very same thing when talking to you. “I… I did my best not to seem frightened. Kyrie needed me to stay strong, the demons couldn’t know and have the upper hand. But I was scared. I was lost. And I wished, deep inside my heart, you’d somehow find me in the darkness.”

“I know.” His answer was quiet, hands still wrapped around yours. You could feel Vergil’s breath as he spoke, slowly opening your eyes to find his looking back at your once again. “I know. No matter where you are, I will always find you.”

For a few seconds, the air lacked in your lungs and the words in your mouth. If you weren’t alone, you would’ve fought the tears that marinated your eyes, even if you didn’t want them to fall – they would rest there, making it seem like you were observing Vergil with a whole universe in yourself, just for him. And he would always appreciate that.

“As soon as I felt your rage, I knew you were coming.” You confided back, making him furrow his brows for a while. “I happen to be pretty good at energy work, Vergil. Remember sometimes I get to feel you back? I did today. And that’s when I knew I was safe.”

The last pieces of the puzzle arranged themselves in Vergil’s head: of course, when he got the strongest emotions from you, it was easier for you to get his. But when his emotions were too strong, that connection could work as well, for better or for worse – and he remembered how you flinched in the cathedral when Erlach mentioned how he tortured Vergil… When he was taken aback for a few moments suddenly feeling that pain he tried so hard to forget.

It was a shame you had to feel that too – his eyes went down to your hands while his eyebrows furrowed now from annoyance rather than confusion.

“Don’t beat yourself up about it.” You whispered back, placing your fingers under his chin and making Vergil look back into your eyes. “I’m here for the good, the bad and the ugly – no matter how harrowing it gets. You can always rely on me, as I know I can always rely on you.”

“As long as time will have us be together.”

Vergil’s murmured response was crowned with a gentle kiss on your hands, making you smile softly in return. You knew he was still annoyed with the fact you felt the worst of his emotions, but at least you were safe – and, for now, he would have to settle for that. You just hoped one day Vergil understood you didn’t see those terrible things that happened to him as a flaw, but as something he didn’t have to carry quietly on his own.

It just made you respect him even more than you already did.

“You don’t realize what you are, do you…?” Your question was a little absent as you kept on observing his stern face, with those silvery eyes now staring at you in confusion and distress: his heart beating a little faster, concluding you finally came to your senses that you had decided to give your love to a devil. “You deem yourself as one of the cruelest and worst creatures to ever walk the earth, but you don’t realize… Demons don’t protect their loved ones like you did today.”

To his surprise, you wrapped your arms around his neck, making Vergil instinctively hold your waist so you wouldn’t lose your balance. All the while, you never allowed those vulnerable silver eyes to leave yours.

“Angels do.”

As you placed your lips on his, Vergil’s embrace held you tightly against him – and even after you parted, he remained holding you, his head hidden in your shoulders and your hair. Vergil was silent and didn’t make a single noise, but you could feel the tears leaking into your mouth during the kiss and later dropping on your neck.

His heart could take a lot of harshness and cruelty, pain and torture, without even flinching. But this time… It was the first time in his life that Vergil was seen as good.

And his heart wasn’t used to that.

----

*Inferno, by Dante Allighieri

[wannabanauthor]

To the 9-1-1 fans who are worried about Gerrard becoming captain again of the 118, here’s some info from a government employee (not first responder but I’ve seen people retire and people transfer and have that all messed up due to a grievance or complaint):

All of them can petition to have Gerrard removed due to his past bigotry to 2 current members. He will be transferred elsewhere. If Tommy gets in on it and writes an affidavit detailing Gerrard being homophobic at the medal ceremony and Buck being his boyfriend, that could get him moved out of being Buck’s boss. Hen and Chimney could also have cases of not feeling comfortable with a racist supervisor due to past filed complaints. If they have evidence of his picture with the lady who sabotaged Mara’s adoption, they can claim retaliation for getting him ousted in the past. They can pretty much prevent him from coming back. I’ve seen it happen at the city and county levels.

Retirement is a lengthy-ish process before it goes into effect, so Bobby can reverse it. He can also be hired temporarily as a retiree who is still on the job because the vacancy can’t be filled. I’ve seen it happen in LA City, but I don’t know the technical term.

Fun fact: even supervisors have a probation period, unless they’re temporarily assigned to a post due to vacancy that can’t be filled right away. Gerrard burned too many bridges at the 118, so they could sabotage him easily and get him out of there. However, since he’s a supervisor and government employee, it could be lengthy, but if Bobby wants to return, the higher ups would just transfer Gerrard out rather than deal with endless complaints and potential lawsuit if Gerrard gets back to his old tricks.

Also, have you met government employees? We are some of the pettiest folk around, and we document everything when it comes to fellow employees we don’t like. It’d still take awhile, but Gerrard would be forced into being nice. Otherwise, he’d get hit with a lawsuit and grievance. Even if he’s not immediately removed from his post, he’d be suspended for some time and not able to work with the people who filed against him.

And finally, word spreads in government work. Bad supervisors/employees will end up with a reputation government agency-wide because people transfer/promote between departments and divisions, and locations often, and they talk. I guarantee that Gerrard has done bad things at other stations that have been documented, so there’s a history to go along with any future complaints the 118 will have.

Oh, one more last point, the 118 could pull a stunt similar to what happened in The Closer tv show. When the detectives heard their supervisor might face consequences for some of her actions, they all signed letters saying they would quit if anything happened to her. It rendered the complaints against their supervisor useless since an empty department looks worse than a few higher ups with grudges.

So worry not, the writers have many real life avenues to choose from to put into next season’s storyline to get rid of Gerrard.

Feel free to add more info about government employees in LA or correct me where I said something wrong.

[massivechildtidalwave]

Interesting prompts involving KHR in case anyone wants to use them. KHR X DP edition

This is part one there will be more. Feel free to use just tag me if possible so I can read them.

After a reveal gone wrong Jazz takes Danny and runs to Italy to escape their parents. (she took Italian for curiosity sake and it makes sense for her to go a area who’s language she could speak). Tucker and Sam help with the escape but because all of them leaving would be weird and raise questions they don’t need, are forced to wait until the end of the school year to join them.

Jazz takes the easiest job she could find that makes money because she’s not relying on her brothers best friends family money even if Sam insists, with Tucker giving school information to get through the required bits as quickly as possible. She lands on a high paying customer service job like hairdressing or

Tucker also gives them fake identification just to make sure the government can’t find them and force them back to the Fentons.

whoops! Some members of the Varia frequents the place that she works and are suspicious. (She is way to capable for the job, No CIVILIAN should be able to catch Bels knifes, do hair to perfection and still have time to coo at a cat from across the street while being completely unfazed by the KNIFE they just had to dodge. It’s just something that doesn’t happen.)

Something is clearly not right with Jazz Nightengale, they just know it! Whoever did the background check is getting fired!

Meanwhile with Jazz, she’s doing her best to be normal but she was born a Fenton and there is just a amount of insanity that is tied to that family no matter the legal connection.

Everything Danny learned came from her and I feel like she’s the kind of kid to have picked up knife tricks or random weaponry for the “experience”

Danny is healing, he’s doing online school, she has a well paying job and is going back to school to become either a psychologist or a therapist. In her mind everything is fine.

(Tucker is the kind of kid who breaks into government documents for fun with outdated technology, he could absolutely get his own handmade documents past Varia inspection, he was making them with the intention of them holding up to government scrutiny and is best friends with Sam. )

(Jazz lived in a murder house her entire life while basically parenting Danny, not only can she multitask she is also Flame Active. However I think she would instinctive hide her Flames because of how ‘unnatural powers’ have been handled in her family. I’d place her as either a Rain or a Cloud depending on how well she is mentally after escaping with Danny. This could lead to Cloud Gaurdian Jazz.)

🦋🦋🦋

For Angst or Hurt/Comfort lovers

Danny as Verde could lead to some interesting angst. Maybe Dani needed some help keeping her form and he went into science, maybe we threw himself into science after a Nasty Burger explosion to avoid becoming like Dan, or maybe he had to quickly find a way to earn money after a Reveal gone wrong and decided to use what he knew about technology from his parents to make things for selling.

Of course once he had money he could experiment a little bit. slowly making more and more things based on his interests instead of just for money. However it slowly gets darker as he makes slightly more unhinged experiments with different methods to explain them.

He wants to create a new better prosthetic out of boredom but doesn’t have any one to give him feedback, until he runs into someone attacking someone else. He saves the injured person but their arm is pretty messed up, he might have to remove it. And his prototype is an arm prosthetic so might as well get that feedback!

He remembers his parents muzzles quite well and makes a more horrible version after a nightmare as a way to help get his footing back. “If someone can get out of this, I have no reason to fear their variation of them because I could probably get out of them too! And I recently had to help someone escape an abusive ex so we already have a willing test subject!”

Just him justifying his projects as they get closer and closer to things his parents would have come up with, without noticing or acknowledging that that was what was happening.

The earth shattering revelation when he’s sitting on the ground recovering from an experiment on how to grow back to how he was before the curse, because he had no other lab rat to test it on, and slowly realizing that he’s acting like his parents.

That his fellow Arcobaleno aren’t just distrustful of him and his experiments because he is a stranger to them but that they slightly fear him.

The realization that they only come to him when desperate for an answer. Figuring out that he knows the least about the others not because he is busy but because they do not fully trust him enough to stay around him long enough to give him that information….

Verde, who used to spend countless nights protecting people so much it became an obsession before the accident and his core turned to discovery and the stars, isn’t sure how to fix this.

He gathers the Arcobaleno after making sure the cure works, sits through a meeting full of suspicion he had to talk his way through, slides the case holding the cure into the table and leaves for his labs. The labs he needs to throughly clean and bleach and sort through to make sure all his projects aren’t as bad as they were before, but at this point he had no clue what is supposed to be morally correct to him at this point.

The Arcobaleno are left confused. Verde was doing his mad scientist shit with the cure but he was acting…weird. Weirder than normal, he didn’t demand anything for the cure, nor did he stay to monitor the effects for *science* like he always did for projects like this. He was acting weird enough Skull even went to the lab they knew he was in and tried to talk to him. They were fully expecting him to get pulled into an experiment but Verde just yelled at him to go away.

He sounded panicked. What the fuck was going on with their resident scientist.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

aita for lying to my husband about a drug test?

recreational marijuana became legal in my state this year, and for the past several months my husband (m24) and i (nb23) have been getting edibles pretty regularly.

he’s never had pot prior to this, while i smoked occasionally in college. always with friends, never around him because he’s asthmatic. he hated that i smoked sometimes, and eventually told me that it really bothered him and he wanted me to stop, so i did. when he and i got our first edibles, i hadn’t smoked in almost a year.

turns out he LOVES getting high. it’s fun for me too, but he wants to do it all the time. i prefer to have some weeks off because it makes me tired, and i started getting concerned about how much he wanted to do it. we got married in june and even spent three nights of our honeymoon high in our hotel room.

i’m not against pot, i think it’s fun, but i’d rather we do it in moderation. however, every time I’ve brought up my concerns to him he brushes me off, says he wouldn’t have a problem stopping if he wanted to, but he doesn’t want to. we spent years without it before this and i feel like we always had fun, but now he doesn’t feel like he can have as much fun if he’s not high.

here is where the asshole part comes in. since we just got married last month, i am changing my name. there are several documents i need, and they’re taking weeks to get. i have to have them to change my name at work, and once i provide them they will reverify my employment eligibility. I know the verification is just a government form, but i told my husband that i think i’ll have to pass a drug test as well. i told him i’m not going to take anything with him during july while i wait for my documents to come in because i’m scared i’ll lose my job. he decided to stay sober with me, because he doesn’t want to be high alone. i feel awful for lying to him, but we’re only two weeks into july and he’s already complained a few times about wanting to be high.

i hate lying, and i might be overreacting in my concern for him, i know pot isn’t that addictive, but i don’t want him to feel like he has to be high to have fun. so aita for pretending that i have to pass a drug test so he will be sober for a month?

What are these acronyms?

[c0smicdrift3r]

There are more than stars in the sky

You dont know who i am, and trust me thats for the best. I’m just a noboby that happens to see things normal people aren't meant to see. Things that the entirety of nasa and any other acrynomn of letters of the government body has been hiding from people like you, the common folk. They've already prepared their ways of getting off our little and feeble planet we call home. But let me just tell you it won't matter where they go. Eventually it will all be taken away, whatever they build elsewhere in the cosmos.

My job was to look at all the info and pictures of anomalies in space with other scientists, and to make sure none were a threat to earth,  such as incoming asteroids and large foreign bodies in space. We've all heard of such things at this point, of potential asteroids and large meteors that are going to hit our little planet and destroy us, but that it won't be for millions of years.

Believe me when I say I've seen all of the small objects, asteroids, and comets that have had a close trajectory to our home. It's our job to keep an eye on it. But none of them could ever be compared to what I found, let alone by accident… I wish... I never did find it. I could have lived in bliss until the end of my days.

But I did find it, and I'm the only one who saw it for what it was… a threat to our planet.  Or so I thought. But I might as well entertain you with the tale of my findings since once you read this whole document you'll wish you hadn't.

It had started off as a normal day, the usual pulling up of files and data on the previous night crews findings on our telescope, we call her selene. She is how we have a job where we can make some sort of small impact, otherwise we wouldn't  have a job. Its real name is redacted, due to the government and that it has to be a secret project and all. You have to love the men in suits and their secrets.

But back to the story.  So it was a usual day. The date was July (redacted) of 2017. I know it's in the past, you don't have to point it out to me. But I'm telling it how it was that day. It was a normal day, me working with my team and looking at data that we had collected from the previous shifts team, and that's when I noticed one of our celestial bodies we keep an eye on was gone. It was there and in the next frame it was gone. I'm gonna clarify here, our telescope, our selena, takes images of the sky and the pattern of the stars every hour. It was over three images, I'm now positive I saw the death of a star and system.

 I had to call my colleagues over to make sure I hadn't just lost it, but they were telling me it was just a malfunction and selenas mirrors just needed to be realigned back into position.  But as I was saying, the three frames I saw were just an absolute mystery. The first image showed the star there in its normal place in the night sky, the second image showed a large eruption of that. It was similar to a star collapsing upon itself. There was a bright orange and it had an almost reflective haze to it. The third image it showed  was of nothingness. Through the lense was pure darkness.

 Then the last image… I'm sorry… but it's taking me a minute… I still don't believe it… what I saw, it looked like a snake or serpent made of planets with a nebula around a burning star in its head… it was devouring a planet and taking its matter… it's something I don't think I can get out of my head. But we started trying to follow it and we found a path! It's eating planets that wouldn't be able to contain life. Uninhabited planets rich in resources! 

We somehow found it again today and we are watching it. We've seen it go through three planets already, but we've also seen it turn away planets that can support life on them. It's showing intelligence! We can't believe what we are capturing. It's absolutely stunning! We can't take the pictures fast enough.

So…. Its been a few days since we found the celestial. We might have done something wrong… it's noticed us..  It was in the middle of devouring a frozen planet and then, it.. it turned direclty towards us. It has noticed us. We are doing our best to redirect the telescope, but it's like it's been locked. We can't get any access to it at all. We've tried everything from wiring and the pistons holding it in place, to actually hitting it with our heavy tools to try and break it. Nothing has worked… it's like it's being protected… it couldn't be the celestial could it?

I've reviewed the data… it's still coming toward us and it's moving fast. In a vast distance since it started heading towards us, it has covered light years in a matter of days. We can't even turn off the screens anymore. It's making us watch it. Watch as it moves at an astonishing speed towards earth… what.. what have we done?.

Its nearby now. I've watched it move. It's in the sol system now. I can feel its presence alone in my mind. The things it tells me about the universe… it's not malicious, it's sentient and it's telling me about other races and species… It's beautiful…

It's here now… everyone has left but me and my wife. She believes me. It's not here to harm us, it wants us to grow. But we have met too soon. It's come to erase our minds as a collective species on our planet. It let me speak to it, it consumes  material rich planets and recreates new ones with the matter in places life will grow upon them. There are more than homosapiens in the vastness of space. It told me many things about the universe…so many things. We aren't limited to this planet in our star system. We are a forgotten branch. The split from the rest of the civilization. And we've lost our way, alone in our remote location. It told me so much about other species it has encountered and who have visited us. I thanked it after our conversation.

I found this all written out in a notepad in my desk drawer. I don't know where it came from. We haven't registered or recorded anything like this in months, just a few other anomalies and other things that are pretty extraordinary.

But this feeling after I read this, I can't explain it so im posting it to share with you. It doesn't make sense, we would notice a massive celestial snake in the sky of our planet! But I feel it happened. We were not ready for it though. Its amazing, there's a massive snake in the night sky haha. Hey it's almost as crazy as these other stories my coworkers have told me and that I've seen the effects of. I think I'm going to talk to them some more and see what they have to say about some of our anomalies we've run into.

[sweetbottletops]

Fic Roundup - 2022 Edition

My favorite fic for 2022. Rec for Arcane, Jujutsu Kaisen, with some Spy x Family and The Dragon Prince. Have you read any of these?

The Phantom Guardian by MissingN000 Jujutsu Kaisen (Gen Fic / multi-ship) – Found Family / Canon Diverging AU! *manga spoilers* Toji comes across a child named Maki he is convinced is the missing piece of his scattered memory. His life changes when he decides to take her in. He eventually finds himself smothered in found family. (in progress)

Love, Sex & Robots by AmberZ10 Arcane (Vi/Cait) – Modern Scifi AU "In the two years she’d worked at Kiramman Enterprises, Vi had never seen anyone else go in or out of that door, had never caught a glimpse of what it concealed." You guessed it... She goes through the door. (in progress)

There is No Road Forward Without Pain and Struggle (but neither are we born only to suffer) Series by haline Jujutsu Kaisen (Nobara/Maki, multi-ship) – Found Family / Canon Diverging AU! *manga spoilers* Massive multi-part series following Nobara and Maki through the series into eventual fixit territory. Yuki Tsukumo enthusiast friendly. (complete)

Make Me Feel Loved, Again by Writer_blues Spy x Family (Twilight/Yor) – Amnesia Twilight Twilight wakes up in the hospital with his memories set to Pre-Operation Strix times. As he's piecing his life and work back together he grows suspicious Past!Twilight might have blown his identity along the way with his cover family. (in progress)

I'll Find You When the Sun Goes Black by haline Jujutsu Kaisen (Nobara/Maki, Maki & Mai) – Ghost Hunter AU Sister ghost hunter duo is assigned to investigate a cursed spirit incident in rural Japan. Gojo perhaps did not brief them fully for the job. (complete)

Arcane Sports AU Get an Entire Section

Run at the Cup by TheHomelyBadger Arcane (Vi/Cait) – Hockey AU Two longtime league rivals end up drafted into the same expansion club - the Zaun Sumprats. Their inaugural season documented by an upcoming Zaun filmmaker. (in progress)

Is Love Just Violence by Chelsayyy182 Arcane (Vi/Cait) – Kickboxing AU Zaun fighter needing to go the next step in her career hires a Piltover coach with an impeccable resume who wants a challenge. Everyone has trauma. (in progress)

Save the Last Dance for Me by panglosian Arcane (Vi/Cait) – Dance Company AU Two dance worlds collide when a member of the prestigious Piltover School of Dance plays wingman and attends a life changing Lanes Academy showcase. (complete)

Honorable Mentions

Fic I found had an interesting concept, rare pair, or were long left abandoned, but I still want to remember.

Homeward Bound by seriousam Arcane (Vi/Cait) – Space Scifi AU Caitlyn is the aloof owner of a spaceship that plucks a prisoner off the surface of an unstable planet. She impulsively decides to have her as a guest onboard her ship as she digs deeper into her file. (complete)

Diplomatic Relations by ravensurana The Dragon Prince (Amaya/Janai) – Post-War Modern AU Rival generals find themselves dealing with being out of place in the new normal as the two governments prepare for a historic peace summit. (long incomplete)

Say It Softly by seunflwr Jujutsu Kaisen (Nobara/Maki) – College Omegaverse AU Alpha Maki is ghosting her way through college while dealing with trauma from an accident that sets her apart from everyone and a family she can't conform to. Until she meets someone very loudly going through life on her own terms. (incomplete)

Open My Heart and Let it Bleed Onto Yours by pearlgarner (KiWy) Arcane (Vi/Cait) – Undercover / Fake Girlfriend Canon Diverging AU Teen Vi turns herself in to spare everyone the consequences with only Grayson's visits and letters to Stillwater connecting her to the outside world. After helping Grayson over the years on smaller jobs she is introduced to a young officer with a dangerous theory about a case. Lots of trauma. (complete)

Wintery Arcane Fic Because I'm Feeling Festive Still

Wanted: A Girlfriend for Christmas by RedPanda92 Arcane (Vi/Cait) – Holiday party / Coffee shop AU Caitlyn's boss Marcus keeps scheduling her to work holidays every year and the only way to get out of it in order to visit her parents is to prove she has a significant other. 25 day countdown begins now. (complete)

Counting Down Til Christmas by loveshazel Arcane (Vi/Cait) – Hallmark Holiday AU A small town welcomes in a mysterious outsider who has opened up a bookstore and has ties to the past. (in progress) And They Folded Like Cardboard by SarcastCity Arcane (Vi/Cait) – Winter Olympics AU A Piltover biathlon and a Zaun slopestyle medal winners meet at the Olympic Village during the last night of the games. (in progress)

[emypony]

fucking sick and tired of this dogshit country only making laws for people who can benefit from it due to having connections and knowing higher ups and basically taking advantage of nepotisms

fuck the romanian government and their shitty "laws" that are supposed to help someone starting out but instead they are vestiges meant to suck out all the soul away from you

go get a job!

now find an apartment to rent!

now go get the owner of the apartment to go with you to register you in the space!

make sure you write this apartment is FOR LIVING HAHA WHAT IF YOU'RE RENTING IT TO STORE THINGS HUH???? WE THE GOVERNMENT MUST MAKE SURE YOU AREN'T RICH!!!!!!!!!!!

get your documents!

wait 4 hours in line for said documents!

also go to work in the meantime, btw, and hope for a decent-ish boss! good luck calling and searching and visiting apartments to live in all while this is happening and explaining this to landlords who don't want to pay for your health insurance (a requirement now) as well as renter tax! haha! hahahahaha!

job sucks? barely make it through 3 months crying almost every night and wishing to kill yourself maybe?? praying to god a car hits you on the way to and from work is TOTALLY normal! im sure!

finally out of the shitty job that destroyed you mentally and physically? good luck finding a new one?

oh you found one where it might be decent well SUCKS TO BE YOU BUDDY, all entry level jobs only offer work employment contracts on either 3, 6, or 12 months with the possibility of renewal but NEVER an undetermined period!

oh what's that? you didn't know? you need to be hired at a place that does an undetermined contract for it to count, also you have 30 days and GOOD LUCK if you don't have anyone to help you with money in the meantime.

if you're on your own you're better off dead!

LIKE JUST KILL ME AT THIS POINT JUST TAKE ME OUT

the fucking. WAY you have to prove to the government you're actually piss poor just to get a fucking bone to chew on is insane

if i knew it was THIS much fucking trouble to get a small help from the government i would have just fucking stayed home instead!

ive been through this hell since february and at this point i did not even see one fucking cent from the government even though i should have gotten at least one month's worth

no fucking wonder people are killing themselves left and right. survival isn't living and quite frankly im tired of this shit

tired of doing my best and working so fucking hard and taking so much shit and for what

have the rug pulled out from under your feet

either work a soul crushing job where you end up a shell of a person just to be able to afford to buy food and have a roof over your house or just go HOMELESS i guess ! if you have no one you're FUCKED good luck BOZO

a rapture sounds pretty damn good rn. come on you can just concentrate it real good and smite me on the spot and put me out of my fucking misery

at this point i am just considering forgoing that money all together it is so not worth my mental fucking sanity and my physical wellbeing

the STRESS it has caused me over the past months! i've just up and had it with this piece of shit !

[thessalian]

Thess vs "Help Desks”

Sweet blessed gods, if people are going to try to phase out and or cheap out on phone helpdesk staff for the sake of their bottom line, they could at least do it competently. I’ve been using automated phone trees of one type or another for a long time, since the days when “hold the line while we transfer you to an operator” meant “some people are still using a rotary dial phone”, and it’s amazing to me how they get smarter and yet somehow more ridiculous every time I turn around.

There’s a thing I’ve been dealing with at the behest of my parentals regarding my state pension. Basically, over here, your state pension is based on your National Insurance contributions, and you have to have 35 years of full National Insurance contributions before you can get your full state pension. Thing is, because I worked as a temp a lot, there are a lot of years when I didn’t make a full contribution, and there weren’t National Insurance credits available for a lot of reasons. (It doesn’t help that I was allowed and in fact encouraged to use a temporary National Insurance number for years and it doesn’t look like those years count towards my state pension now, even though I paid above the odds those years. Ugh.) Now, theoretically, if everything goes to plan, I should be able to claim my full state pension because I’ve got fifteen years of full contributions as of this tax year and I’m not due to claim my state pension until 2044. Or later, because they might change the laws on that again; wouldn’t put it past the government as is. Anyway, point is, I should be fine. But it’s possible I won’t be fine, because I am, after all, disabled. Also, let’s face it - my luck with jobs has been made of dogshit for ... well, most of my life, if you think about it. My luck’s holding so far but shit does happen, often, and often to me. So anyway, the point of all this is that you’re allowed to make voluntary contributions towards your state pension for the last five years that a full contribution wasn’t made. My parentals intend to make that voluntary contribution to take five years’ worth of pressure off my quest for a full state pension. Which is nice of them.

Now, if they just didn’t make it so damn complicated to give them money in that way, that’d be great.

They tell you to go to the website and follow the instructions to pay online or by direct debit. They don’t tell you that you need an 18-digit reference number until the box requesting one is staring you in the face. You actually have to go to ancillary information sources (non-HMRC help sites) just to find out how to get that 18-digit reference number they’re apparently so hot for. There are apparently two options for getting one: write to them and wait two weeks while they send one back by post, or call.

However, their automated voice-recognition phone tree piece of bullshit does not understand the difference between National Insurance reference number and National Insurance number. There is a difference. One you get given on a card so you can write it down on tax documents (like a social security number); the other is a very specific number used only by HMRC internally to deal with voluntary National Insurance contributions. However, the automated phone tree does not recognise this difference, so giving it the key phrase “National Insurance reference number” is useless. So is “voluntary National Insurance contributions”, and similar phrases. It’s not that the automated phone tree doesn’t understand it to a point; it just doesn’t recognise it as something I literally need to speak to a human being to sort out. Thus it just says, “Our lines are busy, look up the information online, good-bye”, and hangs up. No option to ask to speak to an advisor, nothing. Just “Check our website; bye. *clik*”

It took awhile, but I finally figured out how to actually speak with a human being in this instance. Every time it repeated the Google-perfect phrase I gave it and asked, “Is that correct?” ... I said “no”. Even if it technically was. See, at that point, deliberately playing obtuse is the only way to go, and even then it was a nightmare. First they just let me try again - “Is this correct?” “No.” Then it suggested some key phrases I could give it as search terms. I picked one that sounded close-ish but no cigar - “Is this correct?” “No.” Then it gave me even simpler verbal options that really did sound like basic Google search terms - “Is this correct?” “No.” Finally, they gave me a number menu, and at the end of that list was “To speak to an advisor, press 4″. They went all the way around the houses to make it as hard as possible to speak to a human being, because every one of the options I was given in the first three tries were designed to point you at the website and hang up on you. I know because I tried them on and off for a fair bit of last week.

Then I spent over an hour on hold. I can’t blame them that much because we are coming on to tax season but especially when you consider how hard that phone tree works to shunt all callers to the website ... fucking hell. All of that for an eventual conversation with a pleasant lady who asked a couple of questions, seemed grateful I had all the information she wanted to hand, and dealt with the whole thing in three minutes.

Don’t even get me started on the power company. On one hand, it’s a little easier to get to the “please hold for an advisor” stage. Not much, but a little. On the other hand, I’m pretty sure they outsource most if not all of their call center and web help staff overseas. Leaving aside the whole “You’re just outsourcing this work overseas so you can get a service while drastically underpaying your staff ... more than you can get away with here, anyway” problem, the other issue there is that if you’re providing call centre services to a company that does business in an English-speaking country ... it might be good if you at the very least made sure the staff providing the services can actually speak English to a reasonable degree. It’s hard to say that without worrying that I’m judging these people for not speaking English, but I swear I’m not judging. I don’t expect them to speak English because I’m fairly sure they’re not in England, or in any other country that speaks English as its first language, come to that. This is bad enough when it’s the web chat help system, where it’s pretty obvious that the person at the other end just copy-pasted your question into a FAQ search and then copy-pasted the result back to you without necessarily knowing what it said; it’s worse when it’s a human being and you need three tries for what effectively boils down to “I want to check my balance” but is a bit more complicated than that.

I’m sure that companies were wetting themselves in sheer joy when technology allowed for the automation of something vaguely resembling a help desk. Thing is, as my brother-from-another-mother says, computers are just very fast idiots. They will do exactly what you tell them, and only exactly what you tell them, and if your request deviates even a little from their parameters of what a request looks like, they will throw a fit. As for outsourcing overseas ... like I said, I don’t blame the people on the other end of the phone or web chat who don’t speak English very well. I blame the people who hire them on at ludicrously low pay and horrific hours and then setting them up for hours of abuse from customers who are a lot less polite than I am about their understandable inability to speak fluent English when they live in a country that doesn’t.

I think this pisses me off to a greater degree than usual these days because of a certain piece of rhetoric regarding jobs and people in this country doing them since the fucking Brexit referendum. They yell about “foreigners taking our jobs” while throwing ones that would actually be perfect for people in this country on a work-from-home basis - for the disabled, carers for small children or vulnerable adults, even for second jobs that wouldn’t require even more time spent on commuting - at places with fewer employment rights and minimum wage laws, which only results in a worse service and more stressed staff. If the xenophobes in this country don’t want “foreigners taking our jobs”, maybe they should demand that we stop throwing 'our jobs’ at ‘foreigners’ in a massively exploitative model that does nothing but fatten the profit margins of the CEOs. And also maybe don’t throw it at computers that require a certain specificity to function in a helpful way, when help desks are generally called by people who don’t have specifics - THAT IS WHY THEY ARE CALLING FOR HELP.

I mean, I think a lot of this boils down to “stop using technology to exploit people in the name of The Great God ECONOMY, you shitheads”, but with specific examples and a lot of frustration.

[gayreligousfallout]

Unless you're up for some barely coherent unedited thoughts, feel free to ignore.

TW for religious trauma and light homophobia

Do things need to be the way they are? We made everything up. We made up what is and isn't a family. We made up what is and isn't a job. Money, language, gender, community, church, government, religion, nations, borders...

I mean it's all just made up right? So what if why does it feel so viscerally wrong for things to change. I want to shout to the void without scaring my friends so I made this account.

The good we have right now won't last. I never had lasted in the past and it won't start lasting now. In a way that's what makes it special. The beauty of the finite. I want to enjoy this because one day, before I'm ready and without my consent, it will end and it will hurt. I know that. So if the hurt is coming, I might as well enjoy it as much as possible until the hurt gets here.

I love my job, I get to make a safe loving community for people who have been cast out of their family and church because of their gender identity, sexuality, or romantic attractions or lack there of. I get to run D&D games for them, cook them dinners, listen to them share their emotions, fears, hopes, and jokes. I get to meet over coffee and sandwiches. I write lessons for them about how to heal, build relationships, and communicate with others. And I don't have to ask them for anything in return. I just get to help them. They mean so much to me. They are my best friends and I love them.

But the money is drying up. The people supporting my work will eventually find out that my great Christian missionary journey has changed from religious fundamentalism and Evangelical nationalism into loving queer people and giving them permission (that they shouldn't need) to question the bible and God.

My wife's job is grinding her into the dust and she needs to leave, but I can't support us. Hell I can't even support myself with the money the mission agency sends. I might have to get another job. Go back to writing code to make ends meet at the cost of my mental health, joy, and all my time that I could be using to help my friends.

I don't want to work for myself. I don't want nice things, I just want to help my friends. I want to love them as well as I can. To show them that love is worth trusting and that they deserve to be loved. But I have to provide for my wife and myself. We have to eat, pay for our roof, and get medicine.

Sometimes I wonder if I could run this whole thing by myself. My coworkers are even more pressed by life to find new jobs than I am. But I don't know how to run a non-profit.im awful at paperwork and administrative tasks. I don't want to have all that authority and power. That's how/why pastors become insane control freaks who sexually assault their members, shame them into hiding, and steal their money.

Is it possible to do this without structure. Is it possible to just be a group of friends without any formal documents and legal recognition? It has to be. That's how it must be in other nations.

I don't want to stop doing this, I don't want to get another job, I don't want my community to disband. But it will I think. It will all end. Even if we make it 10 more years somehow. I'll get too old. People tell me it's possible to stay young and keep doing this work, but I've never seen those people stay young and do it.

I asked where all the 40 year olds were before I started. The pastor handwaved away the questions and promised it was a lifelong career. Well he had the system rigged in his favor and was lying through his teeth.

The system is rigged in my favour to I guess. I feel bad for taking people's money and using it to do what I do. They want some holy warrior to stem the tide of the culture war for Jesus and America. They want me to "fix" gay kids as if there was anything wrong with them. But still they give me money and I take it under false pretenses.

They pay me to study the bible, Christian tradition, Jewish history, 2nd temple writings, rabbinic discourse, church debates, theological nuances, Hebrew, Aramaic, Greek.

Well the deeper you look the less certain things are. The closer I look the more I see the scared, hurting, imperfect people who wrote these letters, poems, and court documents. I don't see a grand plan designed and orchestrated by an all seeing all knowing God, I see what may be a god of limited power interacting with a people group and struggling with their own emotions or it may also be a people group rationalizing their own struggle and success through a god. I've done that more times than I can count.

I think I still have faith, but it's not what it was. It's a softer, kinder, less sure, but more welcoming faith. Maybe that disqualifies me. I don't know. But I love my friends. And they love me. If I deserve to be cast out of Christianity at least I'll get to be cast out with them. If I am cast out of gods grace at least I'll be cast out with them.

I'm not going to give up trying to keep my work going, but I also want to give up the idea that if it ends I will have failed. All things end. That doesn't make everything a failure.

god if you're out there, my people are hurting because of "your people". Please do something.

I can't imagine why someone would read this but if you did, thanks for witnessing me and my life, my anxiety & peace, my hope & hopelessness, & my processing.

[thetetra]

When I graduated college (2013) I applied for 5 GOOD jobs everyday. I was willing to travel world wide, learn a language, pick up new skills, whatever I had to do to get a job.

I did that for 6 months before I got a job that was worth doing (full time position 40 hours paid me enough that I could have an apartment and feed me). I got the position from a friend who I was the dungeon master of his DnD game. I got let go after 14 months because my position was downsized and I was back at it.

I applied to every fastfood place and they all told me my 2 college degrees made me overqualified. I spent so long looking for another job (over a year) that my mother more or less committed identity fraud and tried to make a fake application to fast food with only a highschool education. They pulled up my old resume via my SSN# and called me to tell me "my trick wouldn't work" and that's how I found out that my mother had done such a thing.

The only people who gave a shit that I had been to college were the guys who were trying to collect on the loan. And fast food who said "no thanks, an understanding of Greek Lyric and logical systems is a detriment to the burger flipping process"

Im still an "underachieving embarrassment" to my mother who finds ever more creative ways to call me lazy.

I showed her how hard it is to apply for a good job and why 5 good jobs might take me till 10 pm if I started at 9 am.

You have to rewrite your resume to tailor it to the job position and use specific language from the job posting to get past the robot. (Btw some robots prefer pdf and some word documents. Some have font preference and some take any resumes that are too long and toss them). You have to research the company the position and make a cover letter that's professional and easy to follow. If you get to an HR person they will just toss anything that's hard to read. So no 5 dollar words. You have to provide 3-6 references and keep up with them regularly to make sure they will pick up on unknown numbers. Oh and also the process of submitting data in a resume then retyping all of that out into a forum is just wearisome.

Then do that 4 more times IF you can find good jobs offering an actual amount of money that one can live on.

2016 I applied for a job on Craigslist and I didn't even get interviewed they just confirmed my info for tax purposes and said "you're hired" I went out into my car and cried I was so happy. Showed up the next day ready to start and they said "never heard of you, welcome aboard I guess?"

We need government regulations for hiring and we need them fucking yesterday.

[songvitko]

Revolution ID Photos: The Elegant Intersection of Personality and Privacy with iFoto's AI Headshot Generator

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where a formal ID photo just doesn't seem to capture the essence of who you are? We've all been there – the stiff pose, the awkward smile, the ‘just-right’ outfit that's a bit too formal. Enter the world of iFoto's AI Headshot Generator, a game-changer in the realm of personal image enhancement without compromising on privacy and compliance.

Think of your everyday photo – a candid shot taken during a casual stroll, a candid laugh with friends, or a candid selfie. Now, imagine those photos converted into something formal, professional, and perfect for identification purposes. That's the magic of iFoto's AI Headshot Generator – it's not just about looking the part; it's about feeling confident in that part.

Why does this matter?** Well, for starters, let's talk about the context. In a world where first impressions are formed in the blink of an eye, your ID photo can be the very first thing someone notices about you. It's the snapshot that stands between you and countless opportunities, from securing a job to obtaining a visa. So, how do you ensure that this snapshot is a true reflection of who you are, without feeling like you're posing for a formal portrait?

iFoto's AI Headshot Generator is a tool designed to walk that fine line. It uses artificial intelligence to take your everyday photos and seamlessly change them into something that looks like it was taken by a professional photographer, all while maintaining a high level of privacy and compliance. Here’s how it does it:

1. Privacy with a Personal Touch

When you're putting together an ID photo, you want to feel secure in the knowledge that your personal data is safe. iFoto understands this concern, which is why their AI Headshot Generator ensures that your privacy is a top priority. The technology doesn't require any personal information to work, and the process is completely secure.

2. Compliance Made Easy

Compliance with various ID photo requirements can be a headache. iFoto's AI Headshot Generator takes the guesswork out of it. The tool checks for things like background color, facial expression, and posture, ensuring that the final product meets the criteria for government-issued IDs, visas, or any other official documentation.

3. Personal Image Enhancement

But let's not forget the fun part – making your photo truly yours. iFoto's AI Headshot Generator allows you to fine-tune the final product. You can adjust the brightness, contrast, and even the smile to ensure it captures your personality.

Personal Anecdote

I remember a time when I had to get a new ID photo for a work visa. The standard photos just felt... standard. They didn't reflect who I was. It was then that I finded iFoto's AI Headshot Generator. I uploaded a candid photo I had taken during a casual lunch, and the tool converted it into a professional-looking ID photo that truly represented me. I felt a sense of pride every time someone looked at it – it was like a mini portrait of my personal brand.

Ask Yourself:

How often do you find yourself in a situation where your ID photo just doesn't do you justice? Have you ever wished you could have a photo that captures your essence but meets all the formal requirements? iFoto's AI Headshot Generator might just be the answer.

What's Unique About iFoto's AI Headshot Generator?

One of the standout features of iFoto's AI Headshot Generator is its ability to adapt. The tool isn't just for one-off uses; it's designed to evolve with your needs. Whether you need a new ID photo for a job, a visa, or even just for a personal project, iFoto's AI Headshot Generator can accommodate you.

The Future of ID Photography

As we direct the future of photography, it's clear that technology will play a significant role. iFoto's AI Headshot Generator is at the forefront of this technological revolution. It's not just about making ID photos; it's about personalizing them in a way that feels both secure and enableing.

To sum up, the world of ID photography is evolving, and iFoto's AI Headshot Generator is leading the charge. It's a tool that balances personal image enhancement with privacy and compliance, creating a snapshot that truly reflects you. So, the next time you're in need of a new ID photo, think about how you can incorporate a touch of personal flair into your formal portrait. After all, your ID photo is more than just a requirement; it's a canvas for your personal brand.

Remember, with iFoto's AI Headshot Generator, you're not just taking a photo; you're taking control of how the world sees you.

[qnewsau]

The real-life impact of Queensland's new birth certificates

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/the-real-life-impact-of-queenslands-new-birth-certificates/

The real-life impact of Queensland's new birth certificates

Following changes to laws, trans and gender-diverse people from Queensland are receiving their new birth certificates in the post. We spoke to Emily Wells about her experience.

On the 14th of June 2023, the Queensland parliament passed new laws for trans and gender-diverse people regarding their birth certificates. 

This allowed changes to their birth certificates to occur without having to undergo gender-affirming surgery. 

For Emily Wells, it’s a date she remembers well. 

“It was the 14th of June and I know that because it was an early present as my birthday is the 15th,” she told me. 

“It went through late at night and I listened to the debate in Parliament all day as I couldn’t get down to Brisbane because of work.”

The law passing was after a long campaign that Emily had been at the forefront of for many years.

  View this post on Instagram

  A post shared by Yvette D’Ath MP (@yvettedath)

She would have to wait another 12 months though until the process was put in place to apply. 

“I wrote a few times asking where it was up to,” Emily says.

“They would go ‘Well, you know, we’re still working on the process,’ so when it finally came out I was ready to go.”

The law finally came into effect on June 24 of this year and Emily was on to it straight away. 

“When they released it online, I immediately emailed to get the package, had it all printed off, got everything signed and sent it straight down to Brisbane by certified registered post.”

Receiving her birth certificate

The moment she received her new birth certificate in the mail, is one she will never forget. 

“When I finally got it, I  ripped it open and it t was sort of like it was real,” she explains. 

“It’s a really hard feeling to describe, but it was like something had been completed. Like, ‘Yes, this Is it, this is me.’ Because the front of the birth certificate it’s got my name, and it’s got my gender.” 

Emily also took her new birth certificate to work where colleagues celebrated with her and took photos.

Although other government documentation has previously been put in place, Emily tells me that birth certificates have a special meaning. 

“You might get your license with your name on it, but it’s still not the same as having that primary document showing the correct name and the correct gender. It is just absolutely unreal.”

Emily explains the need for the laws was paramount as not all trans and gender-diverse people can afford the high costs of gender-affirming surgery. 

Equality Australia’s reaction

Ymania Brown, who is trans and at the time was with Equality Australia, described the laws as “life-changing” for trans and gender-diverse folk in Queensland.

“What most people take for granted as a simple piece of paper is for trans and gender-diverse people the right to exist and be seen for who we are,” she said in June.

“Queensland was one of the last places in Australia to have cruel and outdated legal barriers that deny many trans people ID that accurately reflects their gender.”

Having a birth certificate that fails to align with your gender identity means many trans Queenslanders must “out” themselves when applying for jobs, bank accounts, rentals, university or support services.

  View this post on Instagram

  A post shared by Equality Australia (@equalityaustralia)

“It is a distressing experience to be forced to reveal intimate and private details about our bodies and lives, often in public settings,” Ymania said.

“Everyone deserves the respect and dignity of being recognised as themselves.”

The impact of the campaign

Emily often had to be the face of a campaign with many media appearances that did receive some backlash. 

“I knew it was going to be a bit of a tough gig, but someone has to do it,” she tells me matter of factly. 

“I gave up counting the amount of emails I got that were really, really disgusting. My Facebook is open, and so of course I got messages that way and I’ve got a couple of death threats, maybe three or four. But the biggest thing is you just got to keep pushing forward.” 

The fight has certainly been worth it as many other people have reached out to Emily to share the celebration of getting their new birth certificate. 

“The first thing they did was ring me up and let me know that their birth certificate had been corrected. They were so excited, it was fantastic to hear from them, and just to hear the excitement in their voice when they got their first certificate in the mail.”

  View this post on Instagram

  A post shared by LGBTI Legal Service Inc. (@lgbtilegalservice)

LGBTI Legal Service information kit

Queensland’s LGBTI Legal Service is now offering free support to all LGBTQIA+ Queenslanders navigating the new laws.

The service sends a free information kit, containing the forms needed and fact sheets with all the details about the changes.

For Emily, she doesn’t see this as the end of her campaigning and has a final message for the LGBTQIA+ community. 

“We have to stick together and we’ve got to keep fighting for the rest of our rights and defend what we have because it can be taken away in an instant.”

For more information on the LGBTI Legal Service information visit lgbtilegalservice.org.au

Read more:

Queensland’s life-changing new birth certificate laws start

Queensland allows for trans people to change birth certificates

Queensland gender service should be expanded, review finds

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

[shorttermsloansuk]

You Can Resolve Your Financial Emergency with Short Term Loans Online

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There are a few standard requirements to be eligible, such as being a citizen of the United States of America, being at least eighteen years old, working a permanent job that pays at least $800 per month, and having an open bank account. After completing an online application form on the internet and meeting all of these requirements, you can get the fund directly into your bank account. This medium is completely devoid of all kinds of annoying formalities, such as credit checks, long paperwork, and document faxing, among many others.

How Can I Quickly Borrow $1000? What You Require

The requirements for obtaining a $1000  short term loans online vary depending on the loan source. It shouldn't be difficult to obtain a $1000 loan because no collateral is required and credit score requirements are generally lax. However, you need to fulfill the following requirements before you can obtain one: be at least eighteen years old. Give evidence of consistent income. Possess U.S. citizenship or permanent residency status. Present a valid identity card issued by the government. Display your financial records, such as tax returns and bank statements. How Can a $1000 Instant Loan Application Be Made? Four Simple Steps

How can I borrow $1000 right now?" is a question that has an easy solution. Here's where to begin:

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