#but the fandom in general have been dealing with a ton of threats and doxxing

[rat-rosemary]

rat, with all politeness, i dont think q needs therapy. I think something happened behind the scenes between the two (Dream and Q), and Dream upset Q over something that may not be entirely QSMP related--QSMP/USMP may have been the straw to break the camels back. Strong disclaimer, I dont think Dream is abusive/evil, this is just my real life example to illustrate why someone ghosts. It is an extreme--- I cut contact/went no contact with an abusive parent--they took to social media for a year straight with massive posts about how much they loved me, how they dont understand why I did that, how theyre very sorry and support me in everything. They refused to take "i do not want to speak with you, unless you can respect my boundaries" as an answer. Constantly they overstepped. Id tell them "here is why im mad" and they would turn around and say "i dont get why theyre mad?! I apologized?" Or "those reasons arent enough!" Many times other people contacted me on their behalf with claims they were dying/sick. They were not. Some of my parents friends would stalk me/insist I must be mentally unwell.

I dont think Dream is remotely doing that. I think hes a normal, if flawed, guy. However, I empathize heavily with Q. People don't get no-contact. They think its about cruelty. Its about "no matter how much we communicate you continue to not hear me/disrespect me. For my own health, i would like to stop this relationship." Its a last resort for when you tried everything.

I dont know what happened between them, but Im squicked by Dreams refusal to accept Quackity does not want to talk. Its my own personal bias/experience and it bothers me people assume Q's crazy/cruel, because Ive been there. I feel Dreams pain, but I think he might have missed the bigger issue at some point.

But its all speculation. I just ask politely dont label that action crazy. Youre welcome to not reply, i just noticed youre very much trying to see all sides.

Yes, if Quackity didn't want to talk to Dream anymore I think that's fine

But the thing is, he didn't have to talk to Dream to help manage this situation! He could just have made a tweet saying "hey guys, this is not okay, back off" and it would have been fine!

That's why Dream has been so insisting with this whole thing. Because he and his loved ones are in very serious danger, bad enough to get the police AND the fbi involved and Quackity could have helped to make it better by just making a quick comment or a single tweet telling his fans to stop

I absolutely agree that people don't get how hard it is to go non-contact with someone, and I'm sorry you had to deal with that, but Quackity didn't need to be in contact with Dream to do something

Because the people he needed to talk to are his own fans, who he is in contact with

(Also, I'm kind of saying it sounds like Quackity needs therapy because from everything we have been presented with, it sound more like there was something bothering him that he refused to communicate to his friends and it grew until this happen. But hey, I don't know because he refuses to give his side of the story!)

[painted-vale]

Ugh. Another day of bad  arguments that hurt and distract me and many others and poison this fandom. 

I will not name names. But many big Reylo blogs I saw are saying doxing and  Malevolent’s “racially insensitive” fic deserve the same attention. In fact they argue that we should not talk doxing, doxing is a distraction from Malevolent’s racist fanfiction. 

I saw asks and reblogs that  state: “Racism hurts people in real life too, so it is just as important as doxing. No one will stop us from talking about racist fanfiction because that is where our focus should be.”

These arguments are so wrong. On so many levels. 

 What  they say: Racism hurts people in real life.

---> this is very true. Growing up I was called many slurs and had my culture made fun of to my face. I have been passed over for promotions and had people take credit for my work. Treated like an outsider at school and work.  Racism hurts people, yes of course. It has hurt many people far worse than me.

What they say: Malevolent’s work has the same kind of racism that hurts people in real life.

---> Whoa, whoa. How could anyone say the experiences I shared above are the same thing as a racially insensitive fanfic?!  If you say racism in Malevolent’s fic (something I and other POCs disagree on, by the way) causes the same harm as real life racism, you have stated the biggest false equivalence I have heard. If you cannot see you are deluded. 

It is okay to be upset or angry after reading a fic you think is racially insensitive. But if it causes you severe harm, there are bigger issues. I do not say that to be mean. I say it honestly. I wish you healing and peace. But blaming the author is not fair for a severe reaction to a fic. Though the author should hear you and consider further tags. Contact them privately. Be civil. Public comments on A03 are not the place for a talk like this.

Bottom line:  do not treat Malevolent’s race bending and “racist” tropes in her fanfic as the same thing as real world racism. As a POC do not condescend to me like that.

What they say: TSE took it too far, but that is on her. We have to stay on topic. The topic of racism. Do not get distracted by the doxing. 

First off,  Doxing is way more dangerous and harmful than a racist fanfic could ever be. Also, if your issue was how Malevolent handled the discourse, it is still the same conclusion. Doxxing harmed Malevolent and her family way more than people could ever be hurt or offended by her response to the discourse. 

Doxing was a red line. Who knows how many saw Malevolent’s personal info. TSE will never tell.  Any crazy person taking it too far could stalk Malevolent or her family.  They could call work and hurt her livelihood. They know who her mother and husband are.  This is serious stuff.

Malevolent has no idea of what harm might come, or when. And even if nothing does, the threat is awful alone. We are not talking lost followers or flaming comments on A03.  We are speaking of people’s homes, jobs, and family. 

Also, do not forget that doxing arose from the racist fanfic call out. Doxing came from the person who led this call out. People keep trying to brush off the doxing when it was caused by the “Call out Malevolent” movement.

When I see people dodge like this, I keep thinking how it is the Reylo discourse version of,  “You committed obstruction of justice.” “BUT HER EMAILS!!!!”  

Stop it. The doxing came from the discourse. And it was not just TSE who enabled and fueled this. Stop pretending it is one isolated person from a “noble cause”!!!

It was not just one bad apple! TSE uses “we”  in the receipts. She had friends who helped her doxx .

TSE says she sent it to her inner circle, which must have been a very big. Because other discourse blogs  said they saw Malevolent’s facebook posts. 

Who knows how many knew about TSE and her cronies doxxing but said nothing until the rug was ripped out? Maybe this is why TSE had certain “friends”  who denied and avoided the doxing stuff until the evidence was so huge that tons of anons and whistleblowers kept calling them out.

This was NOT ONE BAD APPLE. THIS WAS SYSTEMATIC. 

So what? Not my problem, you might say. WRONG. 

Hundreds of Reylos reblogged call outs started by rotten apples with bad intentions and morals. Most supporters meant well. But they still threw support behind a group of doxxers. What TSE did is not their fault,  but how they handle it  does reflect their integrity. It is simple.

If they were willing to call out Malevolent they must be willing to call out doxxers.

Whatever your feelings on the discourse, only  DOXXING warrants an instant blacklist and condemning without caveats. Learn the difference. 

I am very disappointed in the big blogs who were vocal against Malevolent but now deflect or avoid talk about the doxing of the people who drove the discourse. That is complicity in what TSE and her cronies did.

If these blogs want to have any integrity  they must CONDEMN the doxing with equivocating. Without deflecting to real world “racism.” There is plenty of time to discuss that. And we should. But for now it is false equivalence and avoiding.

If you are someone who did NOT  participate in the discourse, I still encourage you to condemn doxing and blacklist the doxxer.  Because this is a scary new low. We cannot look the other way. 

-------------------------------------

As I said to start, “ugh. “ I hope we end this mess for good. 

Stop deflecting to real life racism so we can heal the  wound from this call out. Condemn doxing and the doxxers.  Blacklist and report the doxxer (TSE).

 Doxing is one of the scariest things that can happen online. It is  grounds for instant blacklisting. A fandom that welcomes doxxers is toxic and unsafe. We know others helped TSE. I really doubt they will turn themselves in but maybe a whistleblower will. I hope so. No one is safe while doxxers are here.

Then reopen discourse for how race is handled in fic. 

I am a POC too. I did not find Malevolent’s stuff racist. But I cannot talk about  the black experience. I want to hear from those people. And I think that racebending is  questionable. I want to talk about racist tropes and racebending civilly, and with no call outs. We can have these talks. No one is trying to stop these talks. I am not trying stop them. I just point out we have to deal with doxxers and doxing first to have any trust or credibility or safety. 

When we do get to this this discourse, it should stay general on the issue of dealing with race in fanfic. NO MORE personal attacks against Malevolent. Especially with her doxxed info from Facebook posts. That is sick. 

When these 2 things happen, Reylos will feel safe to share opinions and content again. The integrity of  big bloggers will be kept. POC will feel heard. And we can all move on.

I want to let this die too. Discourse sucks for me and for everyone.  I have a real life. This takes time and energy. But the community safety is important. Many of us enjoy this fandom. We use it for fun and distraction. We have friends here. This fandom is worth protecting. 

I do not want any more frightened Reylos messaging me to say how helpless they feel. I do not want to see any more deactivated blogs from Reylos scared out of this fandom. While that keeps happening the cancer is still alive. 

Until then, I will speak for silenced and scared Reylos against doxxing and complicity of it in the fandom.