#but that's not gonna stop me from attempting to connect them... something's weird okay i can sense it

[stop-breaking-my-heart-dragonage]

I'm continuing my DAO replay and like....... are we just not going to talk about the fact that Anora's handmaiden is Orlesian?

I'm sorry, how did the Queen of Fereldan end up with an Orlesian handmaid? Did Loghain approve of that? Because I bet he sure didn't! Given everything about him, I bet he threw a real stink about that! And yet, Erlina is close enough to Anora to beg the wardens to save her after she's locked up by Howe, appearing entirely loyal to her.

So I broke out the World of Thedas vol2 to see if it said something in there about her and I couldn't find anything. All the wiki has to say is, "Erlina is the handmaiden of Queen Anora. Not much is known about her background but she apparently escaped from Orlais. Arl Eamon suspects that she is more than a simple servant."

Gee, ya think, Eamon?

I just find that to be a very interesting detail, one that has my theorist gears cranking and spinning.

[songmingisthighs]

Oddeleny

introduction pt. i | pt. ii | pt. iii

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ch. lxxiv - you WILL cry

ghost!yeosang × reader

genre : ghost!au

rating, warning : mature; crude jokes and filthy language, attempted murder (smothering), mentions of (y/n) being attacked, head trauma

wc : 1.7 k

buy me coffee ?

a connection once had, broken with the expectation that the ending is final. but life has an odd proclivity of making attachments from detachments. in the end, we don't know what we lost until we look at what we have

You stared at the person in front of you who looked like he was simply sleeping when in fact you know he was trying to get his consciousness back. It was odd that for such a long time you had been annoyed with him just popping in your screen out of the blue, even his voice made you roll your eyes. But now? You actually hoped he was just trying to find a moment to surprise you by jumping up from the bed or something.

Maybe you were torturing yourself by staying by Yeosang for so long without a break. The sight of him unconscious was one thing, but the fact that there were tubes put in made the visual worse for you. Especially since you kept thinking about the day you found Wooyoung in Yeosang's room, the reason why he had to have more machines to support his life.

Leo had rushed you to the hospital so that the doctors could check you up after the attack just in case.

"This is stupid, I don't need to be checked up! I need to find Wooyoung!" you huffed, trying to get up from the ER bed only to have a hand push your head back down. "Sorry, can't have Leo hyung whooping our asses for letting you run away to do reckless things after he whooped our asses for leaving you alone at the house," Mingi said, moving his hand away when you tried to bite it. "I'm serious, I have a bad feeling about Wooyoung being gone this time and it's not just because he broke the phone Yeosang is in. I knew I should've just plug him into Leo oppa's computer," you whined, still trying to get up but Yunho kept you in place. "(y/n), you need to stop blaming yourself and you're just being paranoid because you just got attacked. We have to wait for the doctor to come back with your test result so just sit still and be calm okay? You told us you'd be calmer if we took you for a check-up at the hospital Yeosang's at but here you are still acting cuckoo," he sighed, shaking his head in disappointment. You glared at him in annoyance, "We can't wait okay, we really need to go!" "Go where?" Yunho asked, sounding like he was taunting you a bit. "To Yeosang, I have a feeling that Wooyoung is gonna do something to him and I need to make sure that nothing bad happens to him because it's bad enough that the technological vessel he's in is broken, we can't have his biological vessel " you answered, not bothering to point out his sarcasm and instead simply trying to get up and out of the bed to make your escape with both Mingi and Yunho watching you. "The phone is with Hongjoong hyung and Jongho, you've screamed at them loud enough to get their assess moving," Mingi chuckled, remembering the way you clawed and screamed at Hongjoong and Jongho who were tasked to try to repair the phone as it was a condition from you to go to the hospital. "Not to the repair shop, genius, I have a feeling and it's a bad one," you muttered more towards yourself because you were trying to figure out the weird things that were happening.

Seeing you so determined, Mingi and Yunho were of course more worried about your wellbeing. And theirs once Leo came back and realized that their resolve was faltering rather spectacularly. They looked at each other and it was as if they had a wordless conversation that resulted in them agreeing that it would be better if they accompanied you doing whatever plan you had. That way, they could prevent anything stupid from happening and you could shield their asses from being handed back on a silver platter by Leo.

"Fine we'll come with so you but you have to be very careful," Yunho stated, crouching down to help you put on your shoes while Mingi helped steady you. "What makes you think Wooyoung is gonna do something to Yeosang anyway?" Mingi asked and you answered him by staring at him with a blank look as if you were saying 'really? you're asking me that?' and thankfully Mingi just shook his head, "Nevermind."

That was how you found yourself sneaking out of the ER and into the private wing with your two large friends trailing behind you, making sure that you wouldn't get in trouble. That was also how the three of you came to find Wooyoung on top of Yeosang on his bed with his heart monitor turned off and a pillow pressed on the unconscious guy's face.

"Wooyoung!" Mingi called out, bursting through the doors and rushing into the room to get Wooyoung off of Yeosang only to be beaten by a vase of flower hitting Wooyoung on the side of his head, causing him to fall off the bed. Mingi turned around to see you huffing with your face red, pausing as you tried to comprehend what you just did. But the shock came down rather quickly because as soon as Wooyoung grunted and tried to get up, you rushed in and pushed him down to the ground again, this time sitting on his back to prevent him from going anywhere.

"You fucking psycho, what were you trying to do!?" You yelled at him, trying your best to keep Wooyoung on the ground but Wooyoung was writhing about trying to get out of your grasp. "Need to stop him! He's going to ruin my life!" Wooyoung screamed, still kicking around to either get him out of your grasp or you off of him.

You knew your twin was crazy but his words still managed to surprise you due to how fucked up it was. "He's unconscious and immobile you daft asshole!"

Luckily, Yunho came rushing in with security guards in tow. It took a bit of maneuvering and keen reflexes because Wooyoung tried to dash when you got off of him but of course, one scrawny asshole against two trained guards was a fool's game.

"...And that's why when you wake up, you owe me another thing to be thankful about," you chuckled after talking to the unconscious Yeosang.

Your words rang in your ears and your smile fell gradually, thinking about what you just told him. "You will... Wake up, right?" tears welled in your eyes and you shuddered thinking about the chances of Yeosang not waking up after so long.

His parents, who had been made aware of the truth (except for the part where their son was stuck in a device, of course), slowly opened themselves up to you being there. They were obviously still reluctant which was normal considering that there were over a decade's worth of grudges and animosity even if it was just from their side. But with Seonghwa, San, and Mingi vouching for you, they allowed you to spend time with Yeosang. Though Yeosang's friends vouches were credible and helpful, his parents also saw how determined you were to be there for Yeosang and unlike Wooyoung, they could absolutely see your genuinitty be it in action and emotion once they put aside their personal feelings and allowed objectivity to show them the truth.

"We have so much to catch up on and I refuse to let Wooyoung's antics separate us again," you then move to sit on Yeosang's bed and lean down to put your face close to his, "We have been through so much together so we owe each other the courtesy of being there for each other now. So I'm keeping my promise here but you have to promise me you'd try to come back so you can reciprocate," you whispered as you planted your lips gently on his forehead. Somehow the feeling of his cold skin made your skin crawl as your brain couldn't help but fear that he was truly gone. The thought made your eyes water and you couldn't do anything, you couldn't move away as you let tears drop from your eyes onto Yeosang's smooth skin. "Please come back, Yeosang. I need you to come back. This is so unfair and I won't stand for this," you sobbed in a hushed tone, "I swear, if you don't come back soon, I will... I will astral project to wherever you are and I will kick your ass."

Silently, you cried to yourself in that room, feeling defeated for the first time which was funny because thus far, you were keeping his friends positive by assuring them that he would come back. You had even joked that if Yeosang could survive his electrocution by surviving in a phone, he could get himself back. You kept reassuring them that Yeosang just need his friends, both old and new, to rally in his side and give him the support he so clearly deserve. But with days and even hours passing, you couldn't help but feel more discouraged.

It wasn't until you felt something creeping up your right hand did you pull away and looked down only to see Yeosang's fingers curling around yours.

"What?" you gasped, immediately pushing yourself off to see Yeosang slowly opening his eyes which seemed hard to do but you saw that he was trying his best to open them and regain his consciousness. "Oh my God," your breath hitched and you immediately reached over to press the call button on the wall which made the nurse from the station outside to rush in. "Yeosang is awake, call his doctor and his parents!" you screamed at the nurse who thankfully nodded and reacted quickly.

Looking back, you saw the corners of Yeosang's lips curling into a smile and you couldn't helo but let more tears drop. "Yeosang is awake, oh my God, you're fucking awake," you shakily repeated before launching yourself to hug Yeosang tightly as you freely cried on his shoulder.

For years, you had had the occasional thought of what would happen if you were to see Yeosang again. You had expected that you two would ignore each other or that he would just hurl hurtful accusation your way, opening up old wounds. Now that the moment arrived, you were never more glad to be wrong.

network :

@cultofdionysusnet @sandsofire @kflixnet @pirateeznet

taglist :

@luvt0kki @aestheticsluut @stayatinykatsy @miaatiny @yukichan67 @maidens-world @wlv-asteria @bee-the-loser @junstulip @keinskpopcorner @donghyuckanti27 @axo-l0tl @cyber-innie @oddracha @dinossaurz @vcutparis @redzie02 @blackb3ll @mizumigi @jan-l @zoro-nanami-wifey @charreddonuts @itasluv @green-agent @teenyfinds @gxlden-bxbyy @that-irrelevant-ricecakeaddict @tinyelfperson @jenowithjaem @mayonnaisehoeshit @allisonleannn @raspberrysannie @surveilenceysystem @borahae-reads @watanabehan @boo-ven9eance @cosmolight @ateezourstars @potatos-on-clouds @iinsomiac @kirbrary @conwunder @akunoeyebrows @kimhongjoongssmile

[hyperfixingfr]

I just had a 2 x Cree shipper try to follow me on main so I'm gonna say this bullshit again since grown ass adults can't get the damn point. Content warning for some mentions of weird proshipping stuff. Not in depth.

2 x Cree is a proship/comship. Aside from the disgusting age gap and role Cree has over Hoagie (most likely having babysat him and/or kids his age), she ASSAULTS him. With no reasoning behind it or comedy/playfulness to it. That's two different types of proship: abusive x abused, and authority x controlled. If you wanna say it for what it really is, much younger x much older.

I. Do. Not. Care. What. You. Change. NO ONE WITH A BRAIN DOES. You can't say, "but I made them adults", "but I made Cree nice" and expect people to take you seriously. The fact that you go as far as to change the canon character just to attempt to justify a disgusting ship should make you stop and think. If you need to change an aspect of canon to make it look better, your ship is disgusting and probably wrong. I don't know why you 2 x Cree shippers keep insinuating this makes it okay, because it doesn't. You don't look at siblings and decide, "how about we make them just really close friends so I can ship them!".

Cree is, as far as the canon has told, unwilling to change. She has no intention of it. She has "nice moments" with her sister, but that means nothing when you think about how people who act like that irl do it. They can't be all evil, or else no one would let them into their lives. It's completely unreasonable to change the very key villain aspect just for some stupid ship. If something were to happen in canon where she has a change of heart, then I would retract my statement. But she hasn't. And it doesn't seem like that will EVER happen, because Cree is supposed to be the villain of the Lincoln family. Her tendency to assault him alone makes it weird, but him being a very obvious abuse victim almost seems like a sort of non con justification/abuser support message. He has been hit and berated by his grandmother for at least since Tommy was a baby... His "feelings" for her in the show are most likely a trauma response at most (similarly to how S/A victims suffer from hypersexuality) and at least, they're just because he's confusing his feelings for Abby with Cree.

And that's just one reason why it's a disgusting ship. What makes it even more concerning is the gap. Look, if they met as adults with fully developed frontal lobes (aka 25+), I'd raise an eyebrow but I'd let 4 years slide. But they didn't. They met as little kids. Hoagie had been in the KND for a long while and most likely knew Cree ever since first grade - when she would've been in fifth grade. She has been there to watch him grow four years behind her ever since he was 7 (estimate). Not only that but the one episode implies that Cree frequently babysits for children of Hoagie's age, if not for Hoagie himself. Betty seemed to be extremely familiar with Cree and extremely trusting in her capabilities to babysit, implying it wouldn't have been her first time. Yes... I get that it was a dream. But the dream was also rooted in reality at the beginning. Hoagie thinking of her as someone to babysit him alone should make you feel weird about the pairing being together, even when they're adults. Because even as adults, they'll still have the same connection they had back then. Those connections don't go away. Normal people tend to always think of their babysitter as, well... Their babysitter. They would remember feeling that sort of connection with their babysitter, and vise versa. But even if she wasn't babysitting him, it would still feel weird. They have four years between them (for all we know, it could be closer to five due to uncounted months). That would make Cree in 9th grade (high school) while Hoagie is still in 5th grade (elementary school). That's such a big gap that Hoagie isn't even in the school level behind Cree, which would be middle school. He's so young, he'd still be in elementary school by the time Cree finally goes to high school. And to remind you once more... They know each other very well during this period. I'm sure they see each other frequently due to teens clashing with the KND. That, or visiting Abby and seeing Cree there.

I'm just gonna say it... It's ridiculous to ship them and try to justify it. If you're just proship and like pedo ships go ahead and just say it. I'm not gonna think of you any differently, but saying it out right is better than trying to hide it. There is NO REASON to want to ship them unless you like the problems the ship has. Abby is right fucking there, and she isn't abusive nor too old for him. It's the same family too - come on! If you personally don't ship 2/5 that's fine. But trying to ship 2/Cree instead is almost blatantly saying, "I wish 2/5 was more problematic". Cree is the older, more malicious counterpart of Abby. Aside from that, they're very similar. Cree is literally Abby's foil. There is no reason to think 2/5 isn't your flow, but 2/Cree is... Unless, once again, you like disgusting ships. And none of you hit me with the "but I ship Abby with someone else" because I don't recall anyone in this fandom bashing multishipping or polyamorous relationships. A matter of fact, most people in this fandom think of Sector V as polyamorous. Don't you dare use the fear of a harmless thing such as multishipping to excuse a creepy ship.

The maturity of you 2/Cree supporters/neutrals is shown very clearly through the amount of bashing and hatemail I've gotten from grown ass adults. None of you have acted any more mature than me and that says a lot.

To sum it up... I'm not a shipping wars person. I'm someone who has very reasonable evidence to support my feelings of disgust towards this ship. There's no reason to want to ship it unless you're proship with the existence of a near identical, canon, within normal age range, much more kind and loving character.

[crimmson]

i'm about to vaguepost about playing helldivers 2 because i'm feeling zesty. I have cramps and no patience.

I play helldivers 2 for fun. do not have the audacity to metagame at me while also being the single biggest source of teamkills every time I play with them.

and this isn't specific to them because i love y'all but a solid 75 percent of my helldivers 2 friends do this, but the person I'm mad at also does this, see previous statement about teamkills:

say words when you are throwing your fucking stratagems perhaps?? perhaps say you are throwing a giant nuclear bomb of death near us so we have time to make an attempt to get clear?? like yes silly accidents happen, that's part of what makes helldivers 2 so fun. I laugh my ass off when shit goes sideways. yes, it is genuinely funny when your teammate gets ragdolled and drops their Big Explosion Button right on the team, and I cannot emphasize enough how much I am not being sarcastic. it is genuinely the funniest shit.

but that is completely different from what I'm talking about. I need people to stop shutting down all your fucking lines of communication and going silent every time a fight gets hectic. SAY WORDS. PLEASE. I can at least work with SOMETHING better than I can work with NOTHING. like literally even just making weird noises works because i literally have learned what those noises mean and honestly it's great shorthand. and even something simple like "danger close" is great. but I cannot fucking interpret dead silence.

also open your fucking ears sometimes maybe. I have to assume this is connected to going silent when you're focusing. but nothing pisses me off more than me saying I'm gonna go take out an enemy structure, I have the equipment, I get all the fucking way there, and then they just fucking show up and do it instead. like oh. Okay. so nobody was listening to me at all actually, or did not care. i'm giving fucking status updates the entire time, and half that time I'm being ignored. and i guess it only bothers me because i'm always fucking listening and absorbing everything as everyone is running around and giving their own status updates. Even while i'm fighting for my fucking life in some trench. so i just cannot fathom why it's that hard for other people to fucking listen to me. i'm not saying that's right or fair on my part, but it's happening.

realistically I can forgive a lot of the above when it's literally anyone else except this one person, because I know my other friends' playstyles and personalities so I can adapt pretty well, and everything else just sort of makes up for it, and I don't mind it. But with this one person I lose my fucking mind and i just sit there grinding my teeth because it's also compounded with 500 other things that has nothing to do with the game but I am just always at like 50% Annoyance Capacity with them by default.

i think a good tldr is this game is really great and showing who works well under pressure and who doesn't, and jesus christ some of my friends are really really bad under pressure. and i know this and i love them. and then there are the people who are not my friends, and I cannot forgive them for this.

christ anyway I just don't mesh particularly well with this one person's playstyle but they always fucking show up and I can never seem to play with any of the people I want to play with, WITHOUT that one person. and i'm trying not to be a huge bitch about it but jesus christ i fucking miss playing with some of the other people and other group comps. but I have to be nice and fucking tiptoe around for reasons.

[canonicallysoulmates]

Mr. Rolin Jones, creator and showrunner of Interview with the Vampire appeared on the post-finale episode of the companion podcast to talk about this first season but also season 2, and the future of this series. It's super insightful, I highly recommend giving it a listen, we learn so much about the process behind creating this show and this season but also about what's coming next like he's thinking about this show in long-game terms like going on for 8yrs minimum, and by the sounds of it so is AMC. The first book is going to be explored in 15 episodes total, we've got the first 7 which means s2 would be 8 episodes. And start getting excited for s3 because the current plan is that the third season will give our brat prince the opportunity to tell his side of the story and explore the second book, The Vampire Lestat.

In this post, I have compiled some highlights of his interview but I reiterate that if you can do so to give the full thing a listen cause it's really interesting.

On getting picked to be the showrunner:

"I came back to the loving arms of AMC. I had done some work with them before and there were a lot of really savy executives, I had a big overall meeting- here are 19 things I wanna do for you guys, talk, talk talk, talk, talk, as I'm leaving the door one of them goes 'you know we forgot to mention our bosses bought the Anne Rice books' and I stopped, and I put everything down, sat back down and said 'we're gonna take another 45 minutes for this meeting' and by the time I walked out I kinda knew that's that I was gonna do. And then they put me through a gauntlet of things to prove that I was the guy and it wasn't just about what's a good pilot story, what's a good first season it was what does this thing look like 8 years from now?"

Up until today, I didn't know showrunners basically had to audition.

About the decision to change Louis race:

"I kinda came around to his ethnicity through a very weird way which is through Lestat. So, there's a very famous sort of rewrite of Lestat starting with book 2 he's an aggressively different character than he was in book 1 but that's the Lestat that she carried on for the rest of time. And I was like okay that should be Lestat and so we tried to take the given circumstances that are set with Lestat and put him back into this time period, and so he had this sort of super emo relationship with this guy named Nicki, and then he had a very...uh, excitable relationship with his mother as his second companion choice- get into that season 3 y'all. And then I was like let's give Lestat a legitimate third attempt at trying to figure out how to be with somebody for the rest of his life and how do you not repeat your mistakes. So, I started from there and I wanted somebody who had some money cause I think he wanted to be you know with his own folks there, and I think he wanted someone I thought who could fight back and who could be a challenge and who would force him to restrain himself. And nobody at AMC was really interested in seven seasons of the regretful plantation owner so you know- even with that though you want it to have some connective threads to the novel so we made Louis come from a lineage that once did own a plantation, did own slaves. The other thing was sort of aesthetic if you were gonna take away the ruffled shirts and all the swampy goodness and you wanted to make this something new, what's the next hot time that had a sense of smell and taste and sound? The birth of jazz seemed pretty right on, and it just so happened there was a spot at that historical time where a black man could get in on some business and still have the sort of morally grey thing that owning a plantation would and- I don't know it all actually clicked into place pretty quickly."

How do they decide when they deviate from the books?

"There were a couple caveats. Make it here and now, make it grand and big but we said you know look she wrote a very transgressive groundbreaking novel in 1973 and try to put her in the room where she was tasked in 2021 with making a tv show out of this and you want it - there's no reason to do something if you're going to just run rough shot over it. So you're constantly, constantly revisiting the book and that's not only in the room where you're building story but that's when you're in draft, that's when you're in after production draft, that's when you're last minute like little things and you find some things that you had passed over didn't think were relevant like 'I'm screaming back at you' and dropping in as much Anne as we could, and that we were gonna write this sort of heightened language that is in the novel we're gonna make our actors talk like that; she is our safety net all the time."

This is insane, when they were in pre-production they were writing scripts for the entire book but due to covid and the cost of lumber AMC called and asked if they had enough in the first half to stay in New Orleans for the entire season. At first, Rolin's put up a fight but what they did was they turned what was originally the first four episodes into this first season. And they did so 50 days before they shot the first day! His original pitch was 10 episodes, they were aiming for 8 but it's now a 15-episode book. He does think the change was to the benefit of the show. I agree, it's mind-blowing to think that the amazing 7 episodes we got were originally compacted into just 4 and that they managed to change course and deliver a product of such high quality within just 50 days.

"Memory is a very, very huge part of this show. The tagline for this show should be: memory is a monster. We're only on episode 7 of 15, you only know half of it. Maybe." 👀

Why is Louis truly doing this interview?

"It is absolutely the question. If you wanna know what we're still digging out of it, it is the why of it. There's a real reason why this is a second interview and the first interview is super important. Tune in season 2. And I will just say this, these two (Daniel and Louis) have been brought together because something very significant happened, life-altering happened to them in 1973. And they didn't get it right and they weren't the right people at the time to do it, and know they think they are, and yet like all of us you still don't know who you are and you still gotta go deeper but that just means there is a lot of meat not only on Louis side but on Molloy's side and most importantly Armand's side who has become for us the single most fascinating character of season 2. Yeah, there's a lot in Dubai that's yet to be revealed."

I need s2 to hurry tf up because what does that mean sir 👀👀👀👀

The real reason he wanted to do this show is s3, The Vampire Lestat. He really knows how he wants to do it, and he couldn't be more excited about it. As goofy as body switching is, and they'll come up with some elegant way, he thinks there's something in the Tale of the Body Thief, Queen of the Dammed he has to think about because it's so massive, and he doesn't know if that's gonna be covered over one season or two.

[feelo-fick]

Scarab & Prismo & Snufkin & Muddler for the character bingo!

(doesn’t have to be all of these of course. But can be)

I NEED TO KILL SCARAB. ITS A NEED. I NEED HIS BLOOD (<- will weep at any angst including him). HES EVEYTHING HES HORRIBLE HES A WRETCHED THING I HATE HIM HES THE WORST I WILL KISS HIM. AUGH. what the hell.

anyways i find him relatable.. something something vulnerability hard and shit yada yada but ALSO i make weird squawking/squeaky noises when im annoyed and i like to imagine he does that with the chirping... its funny

ALSO THE FANDOM KEEPS MAKING HIM SUFFER AND I LOVE IT AND WANT MORE BUT ALSO OW FUCK THAT HURTS WHY OW OW OW everything about his - concerning - respect (kneel for your life.) for authority (he was only following orders.) and isolation (he was never invited to those parties.) from the rest of. well everyone (he doesnt need them. he enjoys being alone. he doesnt need anyone else. he doesnt want it, he doesnt want it, he promises he doesnt.) is just SO. augh.

and the self sabotaging aspect of it. no one will love you, youve accepted that, so you stop sanding down your teeth. you bite and claw at any attempt to soothe your aches and stroke your spikes down, theyre only trying to find a soft spot near your belly.

your worst fears come true. youll never let it happen again. youll stand straight, youll make yourself seem bigger to scare off anyone who tries to come close to you. which leads to anyone who couldve helped you being dissuaded and backing off. serves them right, you never needed fixing. you never needed anyone. ...the clycle begins again. it aches. why? it shouldnt. that isnt allowed.

they should stop that, stop poking at the weak spots. it hurts to feel. you KNOW its to help. you dont want to be helped. stop it, stop. everyones going to know. they cant know it aches. theyll use it against you. keep kneeling, head lower, arch your back. maybe theyll be amused enough to give you mercy.

...cough. well anyways. im gonna stop here before this turns into a full on character analysis and MOVE ON TO THE NEXT ONEEEE WOO

(youll start to notice a pattern that i express love for characters by wishing to kill them cough)

ANYWAYS MY SECOND HUSBAAND WHOM I WANT DEAD . hes. hes so. i cant.

i honestly love his aesthetic i dont know why. the tv/light/dream shit has a lot of potential methinks. i love the thought of a job swap au where prismo uses light/tech as a way to interact with the world while still being stuck somewhere else... and also the visual funkiness of him being projected onto many many tv screens brings me joy. i want that gender...

also. in general i love it when gods are depicted ss being really mortal-like... like, youre a cosmic being with power and omnipotence over the multiverses you watch over, and yet. you like sandwiches and pools and games and hanging out wih friends and its just. on every level but literal you are mortal and alive and wholly r e a l. but youre not. youre a dream, a projection, youre not even in the dimensions of the people you (love) watch. youre an outsider and its very clear. youre THIS CLOSE to being just like them. but youre not. and you never will be.

youre admired by those who are like you, but you dont really care for it. but those who you do care about either dont see you as anything more than a tool to manipulate the multiverse or see you as too grand to be able to connect with in a way that isnt "you are god and i am not". youre stuck in a prison you yourself control. but a prison is still a prison. people want what you have- how you wished they had it instead of you! maybe then, youd be loved. maybe then, things wouldnt be so ear-deafingly quiet. silence sticks out like a sore thumb in the yearning- the wish to not be alone.

OKAY AM I JUST GONNA DO THIS FOR ALL OF THEM. WHAT THE HELL. MOVING ON.

okay this time im not gonna intensely analyse his character. hopefully.

AHEM . SNUFKIN!!!! my best friend i love him so so much.......... i need to absorb his fucking vibes and gender so hard what the hell. LIKE BROTHER. HOW DO YOU PULL OFF THAT MUCH SWAGGER WITHOUT EVEN TRYING oh and also there are so many things wrong with you are you like okay bud...

i like to think that "omg hes just like me frfr" but the fact that i get so excited about that thought proves that I actually kin moomintroll nsnxjsjjsj WHICH MAKES SENSE. makes a lot of sense

i love how people interpret his personality... and i love seeing all the potential angst/drama/whatever you call it that could pop up because of how avoindant he is... and his relationships with the other characters... the way he so easily distances himself from others while (i know this isnt about him but once you talk deeply about one of them i suppose you cant leave out the other) moomintroll clings a little too hard onto him...

ill be honest im a bit rusty on anything moomin related, so forgive my poor memory + hesitation, but i do love em a lot still!!! no hyperfixation is dead, just dormant, as they say........... havent thought about them in a while but i should really brush up on everyones characters and the way they interact ... would be really helpful for some analysis and application to my own work and- YEAH WHATEVER YOU GET IT NEXT ONE

OKAY SO I HAVENT HEARD TOO MUCH ABOUT MUDDLER (aside from bloom's stuff - bless you bloom) BUT WHAT I DO KNOW IS THAT HES VERY RELATABLE AND FUNKY AND I LOVE HIM FOR THAT... button collector.... so me fr............

im quite neutral on account of the fact that (again) i havent seen much of him, but i think hes really neato and also(!) i actually used him as inspo for my sona design... ITS JUST THAT, his design fucks so hard so so hard its such a good design. PEAK. absolute peak...

IDK ! i think muddler is such a nice and cool little critter... i would love to have more content of him!!! i need to know more about him!!! honestly atp someone could tag me on muddler content id be happy to have it... i think id really really love him if i just knew more(!!!) but i dont unfortunately waaah..

[aprillikesthings]

OKAY I meant to start earlier in the day but I know once I start it will be difficult to stop lol

but I have some tasty pasta to eat let's go

(how much do you want to bet EVERY EPISODE after this is a two-parter due to the sheer amount of plot bumping into tumblr's images-per-post limit)

s4 ep11 beast island

They're talking about their plan to go to Beast Island and get Entrapta--and side note, the ship goes about as fast as an airplane, judging by the clouds/ocean's movement

will she tho

(I actually don't know! This is one of those plot points I forgot in part because I marathoned the last season and change of the show almost four years ago lol; like seriously from this point on I can remember random specific scenes but not which order or why they happened; it definitely doesn't help that a couple months ago I watched a bunch of She-Ra humor videos that are all, like, just clips from s5 in no particular order)

(seriously if you're a She-Ra fan they're great, they're especially funny if you're high as balls, which Daci and I were when I was like "hey you have to watch these with me they're hilarious")

the globe map is throwing some kind of angry alarm and Swift Wind's senses are tingling

They hit....something!

points to whomever designed that, it looks really cool, and yes, vaguely menacing

okay but you were ALSO told that Princesses were all evil soooo

They find Entrapta's mask and a Horde-made skiff and Swift Wind can hear some kinda weird noise

the ship did call it a Hazardous Materials Disposal Site...

anyway a bug-robot-thing starts to attack them--and Adora can't transform to She-Ra here!

OH HEY so the droning sound Swift Wind keeps hearing that's super fucking creepy is a Shepard Tone! (more info via wikipedia of course)

("April how do you know so much random shit?" I have ADHD and an internet connection. Also in this case specifically, Alex Hirsch once did an AMA in character as Bill Cipher, and he linked to a Shepard Tone and said it was his favorite song.)

Anyway they're attempting to fight the bug and losing

:D I KNOW WHO THIS IS :D

He scares the bug off with magic!! (Shadow Weaver did say he was a powerful sorcerer...)

dun dun DUNNNN

okay so I was confused as to how Glimmer was gonna get in there and duh SHE CAN FUCKING TELEPORT ffs

anyway Light Hope is a computer program and you're not the correct input??? you can't just order it to work pfft

YOU'RE NOT SHE-RA lol

Anyway King Micah hasn't been around other people in a loooong time and is bad with things like "personal space" lol

they're asking about Entrapta and I love that everyone in this show just Knows that Entrapta is like. Into robots. Sexually.

(I'm not looking right now but SOMEone has to have written a fic of Entrapta just making, like, really wild sex toys or fuckable robots, right? Right???)

LOL THAT'S HER ALL RIGHT

Entrapta apparently went to the center of the island but Micah is discouraging them from going. The sound Swift Wind keeps hearing is a signal of some kind from the center--

Apparently the signal is enough to draw people in and drive them mad.

poor dude

Also he thinks Glimmer is still a child and asks about Angella, and Bow and Adora just do a 😬

But they promise to take Micah with them once they find Entrapta and leave

I dunno I think it's kinda cute

Anyway as they keep walking both of them start having moments of borderline-crippling self doubt

Glimmer's killed the spiders that the Crystal Castle sets on intruders and is still trying to harass Light Hope into talking to her:

Apparently yelling that she wants to use the Heart of Etheria was the right thing to say

Back on Beast Island, the signal is getting stronger, Micah is trying to get more information about Glimmer from Bow and Adora, and also they're being hunted by critters:

There's some kind of distorted speech in the signal (which still mostly sounds like a Shepard Tone), and Swift Wind is frozen in place by it and this is happening--

CREEPY AS FUCK

D:

D:

Adora, trying to convince Micah not to give in, blurts out that Glimmer is Queen, oops

D:

D:

oh god there's a flash of light and Adora relives Angella kissing her forehead and telling her "take care of each other," then a bunch of moments of her and Glimmer, then:

"I won't give up, not on my friends, not on Etheria,"

--and she transforms into She-Ra :D

NICE!

The blast frees everyone of the vines and they're back to being themselves

"It wasn't the signal stopping me from being She-Ra, it was me. I was afraid Glimmer was right,"

"But I promise I'd take care of her--take care of everyone, and I will"

(actually you promised you'd all take care of each other, but whatever; like, this is part of her whole character arc)

Side note, She-Ra is taller than Micah by like, half a head minimum

The scary critters all run off because some huge monster shows up, the monster opens its metal jaws, and

and I've run out of images with three minutes to go pfft okay hold on

[cheswirls]

a:tla la thoughts 1.2

so i guess instead of a bucket list, aang's leaving it to zuko's notebook of info to guide their journey which really is different from the original and i'm not sure i like it. it seems more like a typical american drama plot segway instead of everything atla is. like uhhhh

atla was so meticulously crafted and everything had a thousand different meanings. it's why there's so many analysis videos nowadays on every possible angle in the show and why they're so long every time. the writing has been praised so highly and for good reason. changing elements just to change it and having them be less intentional and less meaningful than the original is not great and it reflects. like, using the notebook isn't a big deal, but at the same time, why couldn't they just have gone the bucket-list route? especially if it took up the same amount of time? now there's most definitely gonna be a long scene of zuko getting the notebook back instead of, like, something they could've fit in that they didn't.

the water scroll is fine. but if they're cutting the pirate episode, it makes me wonder how they'll handle certain things. the pirates come back later bc zhao hires them to blow zuko's ship up before heading to the north pole. iroh's white lotus tile is given attention in a way that's not in-your-face abt it's later importance. there are little things in each episode that come back later.

sokka saying momo would taste like chicken i get is a joke but it rly took me out of the moment. is there poultry in your ice village???? are there regular chickens like anywhere in your world???? afaik the only non-combined animal is bosco the bear and the main cast thought that was weird. the joke still could've been made while actually using an animal sokka would've eaten before and, y'know, exists in the atla universe. like why was that necessary. that line was really approved? no one questioned it all the way thru post? what?

okay after watching the whole thing :) it's ten minutes shorter than the first and i didn't like the writing but the acting was noticeably better. the director in charge of this one is clearly different bc no one is reading lines like they're reading lines. that being said, a lot of the dialogue itself is... not great. through the episode.

i think what i said abt episode 1 applies here too: i don't mind the changes, but i hate the additions. zhao being at kyoshi island is fine. maria zhang is super pretty and i love her as suki. but i don't like what they did with suki's character in this episode. the village being closed off and her mother being in charge and such like yeah it's a change but it's not bad?

what was bad was all the stuff with kyoshi herself. aang is only able to connect with past avatars at their shrines???? o.k. i didn't like any of kyoshi's dialogue. i really really hope that wasn't the spirit world her and aang were talking in bc 1) no explanation to a critical aspect of the atla universe and 2) it looks awful. the purple filter would be fine without the strange blur lighting effect that makes everything hard to look at. not to mention that if that rly was their attempt at the spirit world, it just looked bad bc i could tell that it was a plain regular forest they were standing in. it didn't look otherworldly at all, it jus looked like a poor attempt at a filter. when hei bai was introduced, the spirit world aang enters into is still the village, but we know it's not exactly because he's outside his body and he can't interact with anything in the physical world, which sets it apart even if it looks the same. i'll give it another chance but uh. not liking it rn.

also i rly don't like the direction they're taking the show in. so they're going to the north not to find aang a waterbending teacher but to stop some impending conflict he was given cryptic flashes of. getting a teacher is only a pro of going in the first place. which means it'll be a race to get there in time to stop whatever's coming instead of a journey, which imo sucks all the life out of the show. atla is supposed to be an adventure travel too, not just cut-and-dry solving the 100 year war.

i said earlier cutting the pirate episode is fine, but i did forget a key detail that they didn't add back in at all when showing katara practicing the forms in the scroll: she doesn't have her jealousy spat with aang. katara hasn't been immature at all so far, and i hope that changes bc it's such a key part of her character that she has to overcome and it rly shows how much she's grown through their journey around the world. aang's holdups abt practicing bending makes me think they're gonna cut out jeong jeong and aang being impatient to learn firebending which causes a world of conflict for him later on but is also a host of other things of importance that first get addressed - the first renegade firebender, katara's healing qualities, zhao's stubborn and head-first tendencies that cause problems later, and our first look at fire being not only destructive but an element that is full of life.

side nitpick but i liked sokka's outfit this episode (under his coat) but not katara's. idk if it's the pants on sokka's that sets his apart, but katara's looks too new. it's not worn at all, it's a lot more complicated than her outfit in the original show (which i get cartoons are simplified, but realistically, it rly does separate the two later on from the prestige of the north and the northern water tribe's people) and it looks out of place in some parts bc it doesn't seem authentic. like, it looks like fake material. if that makes sense? it needs to be rougher.

i hope they show roku at some point bc it seems like we're hauling it to the north so i wonder if they'll do the winter solstice stuff at all.

speaking of the writing tho! i finally know what's off about iroh. it's not paul and it's not his look or his voice or his mannerisms. it's all his speaking lines. some of them are not good. most of them are passable, i guess? none of them are iroh, though. it doesn't feel like things iroh would say. two full episodes in, and iroh hasn't said anything thought-provoking or even that would be deemed wise at all.

the sets are stunning still and the choreography is good, so again, it's really the writing direction that i have the biggest problem with. like, it's so easy to tell that bryke left early into production and that the letflix adaptation doesn't have the writer's room that the original atla did. the changes (mostly) would be fine on their own, but i feel like it's people getting in over their heads and deciding they want to add so much content that is ruining this adaptation for me.

also for a whole entire episode spent on kyoshi island, they sure didn't meld any other stuff into it as much as i thought they should've. and idk that i like the direction they're going with zhao.

omashu and haru's village are supposed to be stops before the winter solstice stuff, so i'm hoping they're done right if done in the same episode (hopefully not concurrently but they can share run time perhaps?)

real quick list of things i hope are given focus and not written out

katara's mother's necklace

the structure of omashu not being a flat city

katara getting haru caught by trying to help someone and this coming back to bite them in the ass

^ despite this, katara again trying to help someone to make up for her mistake (in a way that shows her resilience and compassion)

some nod to momo earthbending would be cool bc to me that is one of the funniest moments in atla s1

i want bumi to be silly goofy and trap katara an sokka in rock candy bc that was visually cool in the cartoon and i'd love to see it in live action cgi

bumi having aang guess his name and figure out for himself who the king really is :)

[buckyownsmylife]

Memory - Bucky Barnes smut

The one where Bucky's a vampire but still manages to develop a breeding kink

Warnings: smut, breeding kink, vampire!AU, creampie, daddy kink, mention of blood because of biting

A/N: this is for my darling cousin @whisperlullaby​‘s challenge, and also my own! Like I explained here, I’m going to try to fill every single AU I listed with the characters I picked for the challenge, and since the deadline if May 27, these fics will be posted randomly, as I finish them, instead of on Thursdays, which are my usual one-shot posting days. I hope you guys will enjoy this silly idea of a vampire with a breeding kink 💛 I had a blast writing it! Unbeta’ed because I almost died this week and cannot be bothered to stare at my writing for any longer.

Bucky’s P.O.V.

“Okay, let’s play truth or dare!” I groaned as silently as possible at the proposition. One of the downsides of dating someone in college was having to deal with the immaturity of their friends, especially when I was unable to escape yet another invitation for a weekend getaway.

There were only so many encounters a man could refuse before mysterious became annoying, and I knew I was toeing the line, even if my girlfriend never complained.

She understood just how irritating these gatherings could be to me. It would have been easy to imagine if there was a realistic age gap between us, but considering the centuries that separated our birth dates, it was laughable that anyone would entertain the idea of me with a bunch of young adults who only wanted to get laid, smoke some weed and drink their asses off.

Of course, her friends didn’t know my true age, so they only thought I was a little bit irked by their behavior. Y/N knew the truth, and so evidently she tried to get me out of it, but I resisted.

I wanted her to take part in the normal experiences people her age were having. There was already so much that she was missing out on just by being with me - and I wasn’t even referring to the blood that she granted me every night.

I’d accepted to be there with her that evening. I was going to immerse myself in the full experience, if only to learn a bit more about her and those she surrounded herself with.

Her best friend let out a little excited yell when she noticed that we were joining the circle and I forced myself to smile at her. “Alright, let’s do this.” One of the male friends rubbed his hands before reaching for the bottle, making it spin as I frowned. I thought that was a different game, but apparently I was mistaken.

It landed on a girl I had yet to get acquainted with, and so I disconnected myself from the conversation as I watched my beloved laugh and have fun with her friends. It made me feel warm. It made me grateful I had decided to join.

A few more rounds went by without anything of essence actually happening. I was about to excuse myself when the bottle surprisingly stopped while pointing at Y/N.

She gasped as she stared at the man who was responsible for deciding her fate, and I already knew I wouldn’t like what was coming next. But she was smart, so she avoided the dare that would undoubtedly enrage me, leaving her to answer a question that I also would have preferred not to hear.

“So… Y/N…” He began, taking far too much pleasure at the situation, and by the way she rolled her eyes, I knew she was thinking the same.

“Yes, Simon.” He opened his mouth to say something, but instinctively looked my way. I was trying my best not to let any emotion slip through the cracks of my perfectly constructed mask, but whatever it was that he saw seemed to make him change his mind.

He closed his mouth and frowned, for a second deep in thought, before he sighed and finally voiced his question. “Just tell us one of your kinks.”

It sounded like he was trying to get this over with, and although Y/N seemed just as confused, she cleared her throat and gave him an answer.

“Oh, I don’t know… I guess.. Creampie?” Little giggles and comments rose around the circle, but nothing really stuck out and they were quick to motion her to spin the bottle so another person could have a turn.

It was a different reaction that I was expecting, especially considering what everyone did for much tamer answers, but the explanation for the lukewarm crowd was made clear by a groaned comment from Simon to the man beside him.

“This is no fun now that she isn’t single.” A small giggle resonated by my side, and I turned in the direction it came from to find my girlfriend trying to suppress her amusement behind her palm.

“Something funny, little one?” I knew they’d take notice of the pet name, but I honestly couldn’t be bothered to even pretend to care, and the fact that she smiled openly up at me showed me that she didn’t, either.

“Not at all.” She pulled me closer to deposit a quick peck on my lips and I was sure if my heart was still beating, it would have fluttered at the way she looked at me. “Thanks for coming tonight.”

“Of course.” Thankfully, the game didn’t last much longer - for us, at least. Somehow, the bottle didn’t land on me once, and Y/N started to yawn, her head resting against my shoulder after the third consecutive “Who would you rather bang?” question.

“I think we’re gonna leave for the night,” she excused us even though I knew she wasn’t really sleepy. She really could be an excellent actress when she wanted to.

We walked up the stairs to where the bedrooms were located, quickly getting in what had been assigned as ours for the weekend. She smiled softly at me as she reached for her backpack, no doubt looking for the one shirt of mine she always slept in, but I had a few things in my mind I wanted to ask her about.

“Why do you like creampies to much?” The words spilled out at me so unusually, considering the silence in the room, it didn’t surprise me that it took her a while to answer. When she did though, I was surprised to find her biting her lip, a look between amused and horny in her eyes when she approached me.

“Dunno.” She shrugged, taking my hands in her and playing with my fingers. I knew it was a way to avoid my intense gaze. “Guess I have a bit of a breeding kink, actually. It just felt too personal to share with those guys.”

The answer took me by surprise as I stared down at her, blinking a couple of times as I made sure to really process what she had said.

“A breeding kink?” I confirmed, and she rolled her eyes in that way I knew she did when she was embarrassed but trying to play it off as annoyed.

“Yeah, you know.” She pulled away from me to sit on the bed, legs dangling off of it almost like a child. “I like the idea of being bred. Even though I’m in no way ready to become a mother,” she added in a serious tone, making sure I understood what she meant.

But I didn’t. I didn’t and I guess it was clear in my face, because she quirked an eyebrow and jumped out of the bed, coming to stand before me once more.

“Why is this so weird to you?” She inquired, head tilted in amusement. “You’re over a century old, I’m sure your expectations regarding sexual relationships were related to impregnation for most of your life.”

And I mean… she wasn’t wrong. But I hadn’t thought about that for so long, I guess it didn’t occur to me that there was an actual term for it these days.

“There’s no way you don’t have a breeding kink.” The affirmation sounded almost like a dare, so my instinct was to fight it, wrap my arms around her torso so I’d keep her close to me, but deny it.

“You know I can’t ‘breed’ anyone anymore, darling.” But she wasn’t giving up. Her fingers softly traced my jawline, eyes sparkling with a dangerous glint as she countered, “Doesn’t mean you can’t like the idea of it.”

Even though I didn’t need the oxygen, I inhaled sharply, suddenly fascinated by her every movement, the way she gently unwrapped herself from my arms to slowly unbutton her simple dress, the one she made it look like a fucking gown.

“Think about it, Buck…” Every inch of skin that became exposed to my eyes still had my mouth watering, desperate to taste her all over.

“Wouldn’t you want to see me round with your child?” The question provoked my imagination, playing with her features as I thought about what she proposed. Her breasts fuller, stomach protuberant, and maybe a little feet rubbing against the skin, something I could kiss.

“See me carry your genes, continue your lineage… Wouldn’t you want that?” Her innocent eyes spelled trouble when she stood before me again, close enough to touch.

And I couldn’t deny that the idea did something to my heart - even though it didn’t beat anymore. Most undeniably, it definitely did something to my cock, which now strained against my pants, the arousal that the image of her impregnated by me provoked bursting as I looked at the creature that I loved in wonder and fascination.

“Are you trying to tempt me, doll?” She bit on her lower lip to stop herself from giggling before I pulled it away from her teeth when I took her in my arms again, naked breasts rubbing against my shirt.

“Is it working?” She breathed out, eyes connected to mine while she tried to gather my feelings about her attempt. I pressed her body closer, making sure she’d feel the hardness in my pants before I even voiced it.

“Very well,” I whispered in her ear, enjoying the way my cold breath awakened goosebumps all over her warm skin. She never complained about the difference in temperature, something that I was profoundly grateful for, since I loved to feel her hot blood pumping underneath my fingertips whenever I trailed my digits over her flesh.

“So tell me,” she pressed, still going for seductive even though she sounded slightly out of breath, her desire evident in the way her pupils had dilated. “Would you like to breed me, James?”

A shiver went down my spine at the question and I closed my eyes for just one second, just to relish in this sensation before I opened them to confess, “You have no idea how much I’d like that.”

My hand easily spread her lower lips, middle finger running between them to test her wetness and finding her soaked, like she always seemed to be for me. The knowledge had me smiling as I lifted my hand to taste her before making quick work of my belt, observing her slowly walking backwards towards the bed as I followed, almost like there was a thread connecting us, keeping us close.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” he moaned against my ear as he buried himself inside of me and I clutched at his shoulders, desperate to feel every part of him connected to every part of me.

Only he could get me this way. Chest heaving, mouth open just from the simple act of feeling him stretching me open. It didn’t matter how many times he took me, it still burned the same - and I loved it.

“Tell me, doll,” he panted, hypnotizing eyes connected to mine, unwilling to let my gaze escape his hold. “Tell me you’d want to have my child. You’d look so beautiful with your body changing because of me, wouldn’t you want that?”

I groaned, throwing my head back as James fucked me senseless, his cock ramming against my sweet spot over and over again. He knew no mercy, I knew that. I just never anticipated to have such an overwhelming reaction to a silly little kink I never even thought I’d ever get to explore.

“Answer me, little one.” His fangs came into play then, piercing around the nipple that he sucked, galvanizing me into actually responding, “I would, I would, daddy,” while pulling on his hair without even realizing.

He let go of my breasts to look at me with dark eyes - not because he had come in contact with my blood, oh no. It was clear that this was the reaction to the name that escaped me so easily, waving its way into him until it broke the last bit of his control and left him completely undone, only determined to fuck me.

I watched him lick his lips before he ordered, “tell daddy you want his cum inside of you.” Hearing him acknowledge this other secret kink, refer to himself as it had me delirious, unable to formulate any words to obey him, so I opted to hide my face in the crook of his neck, hoping the feeling of my burning cheeks would satiate him.

What a mistake.

“Oh, so now you’re shy?” He mocked, rubbing his jaw against my cheek as I whined against him. “Want daddy’s cum so much but can’t be a good girl and beg for it?”

I came with a long drawn-out gasp right then, my body twitching underneath his as his cock dragged along my walls once, twice, a third time until it spilled his cum inside of my channel. The act was so hot to me that it had me pulling on his hair, whispers of “I love you, I love you,” tumbling out of my lips.

He silenced me with a kiss, still managing to keep on thrusting until I had to push him away because of my sensitivity.

“Spread your legs for me, little one…” He ordered, brushing his tongue over his lower lip in contemplation. “Let me see the mess I left there.”

I was still a bit nervous about the whole ordeal now that the wave of horniness had left me, but I did eventually spread my legs for him, whimpering as he bit down on his own lip at the sight of his spent dripping from my abused pussy.

“Oh, you look so good like that, darling.” I could barely contain my giddiness as he laid down by my side and pulled me to rest on his chest, pressing a kiss to my temple while he caressed my arm. “But one question remains unanswered.” To my almost sleepy hum, he proceeded, “Why do you like the idea of breeding so much?”

That got me thinking, wiping the tiredness off of my muscles like a bucket of cold water. It felt weird to admit it, but at the same time, I wanted nothing more than to bare my soul to the man I loved, to have him aware of every little thing about me…

So I admitted, “I like the idea of being yours… in this very scary, slightly territorial way.” At his silence, I giggled, hiding my face on his chest as I waited for his response.

“But you are mine,” he reminded me, and even as I rolled my eyes, a silly smile painted my lips, loving that he felt like he needed to tell me that.

“I know I am,” I recognized. “It’s just another way I’d like to be claimed by you. Besides, I can just imagine how well you’d take care of me…”

Silence filled the room as we both got lost in the images of what could never be. Me with a fully-grown belly, walking like a penguin as he held up tiny onesies that looked ridiculous in his huge hands.

My heart ached for what could never be, surely, but I couldn’t really grieve a future I’d never have while I was so happy with the man who wanted to give me one.

“I’ll always take care of you.” He kissed the back of my hand, and even though he knew it wasn’t exactly what I meant, it was just enough. “I’m sorry that I can’t ever give you children.”

The guilt in his tone was almost palpable, and I wanted to do anything in my power to make it disappear. This wasn’t what I intended when I shared my sexual fantasies with him. They were just that - fantasies. I wouldn’t trade my reality for any alternative version the universe could offer me.

“It’s alright, babe,” I assured him, depositing a kiss on his chest, right where his heart would be beating for me if it could. “I think the way you want to claim me is just as territorial… and much more final.”

Bucky held me close, breathing me in - even if he didn’t need to do that to survive - before he asked me the last doubt that still hovered in his mind.

“Aren’t you scared?” And as I laid there in his embrace, feeling loved and cared for, I knew the only acceptable answer that I could give him was, “It’ll be worth it.”

[dannyphantom-justiceleauge]

As much as I believe Vlad to be an iredeemable asshole in cannon, I like the idea of a begrudging mentor Vlad. Like, say in an alternate universe everything starts of the same but he's not got some evil plan to kill Jack and marry Maddie. He's bitter and resents them for turning him into this abomonation, resents them for being happy when he can't, he tries to stay connected, but he just can't stand being near them and fears their reaction to his ghost side. (1/3)

(2/3) He takes advantage of his new powers, he steals and cheats his way to power, living life lavishly, but it doesn't make him happy, none of it fills the emptiness in his heart. He spends most of his life miserable up until one day he invites the Fenton's on a whim, perhaps in some desperate attempt to find happiness again, where he meets Danny. It goes similarly how it went in the show, Vlad discovers he is a halfa like him, see's how his parents treat him... ~ ~ ~ i think part 3 got eaten, bro, but i'm gonna work with what i got.

Vlad sees this kid who's like him who's parents still talk about killing ghosts and destroying them in front of him. not knowing that they're threatening Vlad. that they're threatening their own son. he see's these so called scientist haven't learned anything about ghosts in the years that they've been estranged and that they've managed to make the same mistake twice.

and he see Danny, a moody teenager, going through the traumatic process of dying and gaining hard to control powers on top of being a highschooler and social pariah. he sees this kid in desperate need of guidance and sees his parents who are neglectful and unaware of a fact he learned within a day of knowing Danny. and he says, "if you can't handle the responsibility of having a kid, he's mine now." yoink

except, obviously, he's really, really bad at it. being a mentor, winning Danny over, being a good person. all of it.

initially he just straight up offers to help Danny learn his powers and that works, Danny agrees, because Vlad isn't trying to kill danny's parents or attacking him, or stalking them, so Danny has no reason not to accept the help. Vlad seems okay for all his rich guy eccentricities.

but then the lessons actually start and danny realizes. oh. this guy has no idea how to teach. and oh this guy has the moral compass of a rotary fan. and Danny initially goes with it. in canon danny's can be swayed by petty stuff and money up to a point. he can let a lot of shit go and is even willing to do some soft crime if he thinks it's for the right reasons. and Vlad might beat him up when trying to teach him to fight, but that's part of training, right? and he might be changing a little under Vlad's influence but danny doesn't see that as a bad thing, until Sam and tucker basically call him out and he accidentally hurts one of them. something that Vlad had told him to do.

so danny bails. basically confronts Vlad and tells him he's a shitty mentor and that he's gonna peace out. suck eggs, fruit loop.

but Vlad had thought things were going well. he's gotten attached. he doesn't want to go back to being alone and he and danny are the only two of their species in the world. so typical villain/stalker stuff happens between them for a bit. Vlad tries to win danny over with money, with manipulation, with blackmail. and Danny isn't having it. (he has blackmail on Vlad too). Vlad is growing increasingly desperate and looks and acts a mess. this is a vulnerable Vlad. we're not getting well kept always cocky and put together except when danny embarrasses him Vlad. we're getting a pathetic man trying to cling to the only human(ish) connection he has and slowly falling further into depression and insanity.

and Danny pities him. because Danny had that human connection too. in the early days before he decided he got to see vlad's dorky and cool side. Vlad was generous with his money. vlad only swears in food. he lights up when he watches a packers game and is a total fanboy.

and Danny kinda gets how he became like this. how his isolation and loneliness and fear drove him further and further down the road of corruptness and evil. Danny learns what he would become without his friends and if anything Vlad is better than that. it's almost similar to how he is with val. he understands where she's coming from and sees that she's a good person even if her actions have taken a turn in the wrong direction. he feels the same about Vlad. he thinks maybe he can convince Vlad to be better.

so redemption arc/reverse mentor relationship because danny is gonna be trying to teach Vlad how to stop being a fruit loop and start making some friends his own age. the comedy potential of that is amazing. i have the mental image of Danny convincing vlad to go on a date with Harriet Chin and coaching him from behind her even though he has next to no dating experience either. pure shenanigans.

i also see there being several back and forth instances of kidnapping. Vlad locks Danny in his house because he doesn't want to be alone (Danny eventually escapes and gets mad. Vlad learns never to do that again). Danny kidnaps Vlad to be a chaperone at a school event, mostly to get Vlad to lie for him. another time Vlad kidnaps danny to go to a rich person party because he said he had a kid in a pathetic attempt to make a friend (moral of the episode is lying to make friends doesn't work) so he just has Danny pose as his son that whole episode and they're trying to get along and seem happy, meanwhile snipping at each other in whispers. they think no one is buying that they're related but ironically them arguing at the end of the night is one convinces the person they're family. "me and my daughter would fight all the time, especially at events she didn't want to come to." probably muddies the moral but that's common enough in dp.

just gradually develops into a weird redeemed uncle/mentor dynamic. Vlad really isn't teaching Danny much. he still occasionally has his moments to shine with explaining new powers and showing danny how to commit tax fraud or lie to the police. but he's mostly just this weird guy who's first friend in twenty years is a teenager.

- Hestia

[cevaannss]

Just Friends (Reader x Chris Evans)

Pairing: Reader x Chris Evans

Prompt: “you say we are just friends, but friends don’t know the way you taste” but with a happy ending? - Anon

Warnings: R rating, Some sexual content/Smut, Minors DNI. Brief mentions of/allusions to anxiety.

Authors Notes: This is my first prompt fill on here in years, so I might be a little rusty any feedback is appreciated, please let me know if there’s anything I missed warning or tagging. I also didn’t intend for this to be so long but I got a little carried away with it.

When you and Chris first met, you had been young, wide eyed, fresh faced kids. He was barely 20, filming at your old high school, and you a member of the local theatre group were recruited as an extra. You had graduated a year prior and were coming to the end of your gap year, you would be going to college in a few short months. After seeing each other in passing on set, you and Chris had your first conversation in the kraft services trailer, both leaning in to grab the last remaining bagel. After a back and forth of “you take it” “no you” “seriously its okay” you agreed to split it and thus began your friendship.

It was weird, from that first day you had a connection like neither of you had experienced with anyone else. You talked daily, would be each other’s dates to your friends weddings, hung out with each other’s families without the other around. You were mistaken for boyfriend and girlfriend many times throughout your years of friendship but that was never what it was about. You’d both dated plenty, often times ending relationships because the person you were seeing couldn’t deal with your closeness to each other. But for you both that was just how it was, and if they couldn’t accept it then they weren’t worth your time. Maybe they were right, you had always had a crush on Chris, and you had a feeling it was reciprocated but you’d always had an understanding, a common ground that you were friends and that’s all you’d ever needed to be.

The first time you had edged into more than friends territory was on Chris’ 37th birthday. You had thrown him a party at his house and he had been a little, okay a lot drunk and while you weren’t far behind him you were still sober enough to take care of his messy ass. After everyone had left you had attempted to clean up a bit, collecting garbage and wiping down the kitchen, the whole time Chris was passed out on his couch. You had managed to wake him enough to get him up and into his bedroom, out of his jeans and shoes and into his bed. You bought him a glass of water and two Advil placing them on his beside table, him grabbing your wrist as you placed the water down, pulling you on top of him into a half hug as he tended to do when he was drunk. He’d always been touchy when he was drunk, letting his hands linger on you longer than normal but it had always been innocent. He mumbled something into your ear, something he’d said a million times, and you replied the same response you had given a million more. But what he said next had changed it all.

“No, not like that”

It stopped you in your tracks because what did he mean not like that. It had to be like that. It had always been like that. This wasn’t how this went. Not for the two of you. You weren’t “those” friends.

“Then like what” you had whispered, panic setting in, soberness hitting you like a Mack truck as you looked back at him. But of course he had fallen asleep again, dead to the world, arm wrapped around your waist as you perched on the edge of his bed. Silence filling the air except for the light snoring he was emitting.

The next morning you had been awoken by clattering coming from the kitchen. Stumbling out of the guest room you walked in to Chris attempting to make breakfast, standing in the door way you watched him, his eyes squinted and slow moving, lingering proof of his previous inebriation. He was making blueberry pancakes, it was a post birthday tradition, but you were usually the one who made them for him on the day after his birthday.

Seeing him standing there sliding another half burnt pancake onto the stack he had started made you smile, he tried bless him, but he was never great in the kitchen. The conversation from last night soon flooded your memory and you couldn’t stop yourself.

“What did you mean”

Chris looked up from pouring more batter into the pan, finally noticing your presence.

“Morning” he mumbled, clearly not fully awake yet “What do you mean, what did I mean?”

“Last night, in your room, you said you loved me...”

“I always say I love you?” He let out a low chuckle but looked confused, you weren’t sure if he really didn’t remember or if he was just pleading ignorance, usually you were quick to spot if he was lying but this time your radar couldn’t pin it. He turned his attention back to flipping the pancake in the pan.

“Yeah but when I said I love you too bestie... you said ‘No, not like that’ what did you mean?”

His head snapped up, redness filling his cheeks, and it was in that moment that you had known things were changing whether you had wanted them to or not.

“Oh” you said, your breath escaping you, as the realization hit.

“Yeah” he said eyes focused on the pancake burning in the pan.

“Chris...”

He pulled the pan off the stove dumping the last pancake on the plate before placing the pan in the sink letting the cold water run over it before turning back to face you.

“I don’t...what do you want me to say” He started, raising his voice slightly, obviously flustered. “You want me to say I was drunk and didn’t know what I was saying? Because I cant okay, I can’t say that. Would I have said it if I were sober? No, probably not...in fact definitely not. But I did and I can’t take it back or just pretend I didn’t because I do love you, I’ve always loved you”

“I’ve always loved you too Chris” you looked up, your eyes connecting with his blue ones.

“Yeah, but not in the same way” he stepped around the counter standing in front of you now, his frame towering over yours.

“Said who”

“What”

“Who said I don’t love you in the same way?”

Chris lunged forward, one hand grasping your waist, the other coming up to cup your face as he leant down, his lips pressing against yours gently. It took you a second to realize what was happening before your hands found their way around his neck pulling him down to you, deepening the kiss.

From that day onward you became the friends who make out occasionally, it wasn’t the right time for you to try and be anything more, yes you loved each other, more deeply than you first understood but your lives were all over the place, you were rarely in the same city for more than a few weeks at a time and Chris’ career was exploding more than ever. It wasn’t the right time. So you’d both take what you could get when you could get it and that was enough for either of you.

It wasn’t until Chris’ 38th birthday a year later that you let things go any further. He had wanted a small celebration, so you had gone to dinner with a few friends, had a few drinks and then headed back to his place to watch a movie. You had been cuddled up on the couch, passing a beer back and forth between you when he placed it down on the coffee table, his hand sliding down your thigh, before pulling you into his lap. You had placed your knees on either side of his thighs, your hands on his shoulders while his trailed down your sides and over your hips before slowly moving to cup your ass. You leant down to place a soft kiss on his lips, him reattaching them as soon as you pulled away, biting your lower lip roughly.

There was something different in the way he was kissing you, the way he was touching you, more heat, more passion. Your hands were running down his chest as his grip on your ass tightened, holding you close to him, the intensity taking over. Before you knew it your shirt was on the floor and his hands were sliding up your back as your lips found their way to his neck. There was a tenacity in every movement, every touch, every kiss. His hands finding the clasp of your bra, undoing it with ease and discarding it with your shirt on the floor. He pulled away slightly, his eyes raking over your body perched on top of him, eyes filled with need and want, pushing up to connect your lips once again as you could feel the hard length of his cock pressing against you through his jeans. His large hands sliding to your thighs before standing you both up, your legs wrapping around his waist, hands in his hair.

He stumbled his way into his bedroom laying you down on his bed placing a soft kiss to your lips before hurriedly kissing down the side of your neck and chest, between your breasts and down to your belly button stopping at the waist of your jean shorts, fingers dancing over the button as he looked up at you, eyes questioning as if to get the go ahead, you nodded gently. He slid your shorts and underwear down your thighs, discarding them and grabbing at the hem of his shirt, pulling it over his head before sliding off his jeans and boxers. You let your eyes trail his body as he situated himself between your legs leaning down to kiss you again.

“Are we really gonna do this” he laughed as he tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear.

“I think so” you blushed, eyes meeting his once again, yours filled with anticipation, his with desire.

When you woke up the next morning, your head on his chest, his fingers running through your hair, you didn’t know how to feel, but you knew things were moving into a far more complicated territory.

The two of you went on this way for a while, hanging out with friends and family as if nothing had changed, but when it was just the two of you it was different, intimate. When you were away from each other you facetimed daily, you shared everything, you always had but now it felt like everything you were used to but magnified. When he was gone you missed him, when you were together you felt complete. It was so familiar but so new at the same time. At this point you were dating without the title, which had been fine with you both, you liked what you had together it was easy, simple, no pressure.

In early August you had moved in, the apartment you rented was being sold and Chris insisted it would be helping him, and besides he had said, you were there whenever he was anyway. You had your own room but it was rarely used, most nights falling asleep together in Chris’ bed, both finding you slept better when you were together. It was one of those nights, curled up in his bed, Dodger at your feet, watching a rerun of some sitcom when Chris had asked you if you would go to Toronto with him the next month, his latest film Knives Out was premiering at the film festival there and he had been equal parts excited and nervous about it. You had been taken aback at first, sure you’d visited him on set before and attended a few premieres but this felt different.

“You want me to?” You sat up turning to face him.

“Obviously” he laughed “I’d take you everywhere with me if I could”

“Aww cute” you chuckled pinching his cheek as he kissed the tip of your nose.

“I have press a lot of the time, but you could hang out do some sight seeing, then come to the premiere with me?”

“With you...or with you?”

“Whichever one means I get to have you beside me on the red carpet”

“I don’t know Chris...you know that will start a shit storm” you knew how bad the rumours that had started when fans spotted you just attending the premiere for the last Avengers movie had been, and while it really didn’t bother you, you didn’t want it to have an affect on his career.

“Honestly? I don’t care.”

“Okay” you knew he wouldn’t say it but you could tell from his face that he was feeling anxious about it “I’ll come with you, but if you decide any time that you’d rather walk the carpet alone thats okay”

“I won’t” he reassured you, placing a kiss to your temple.

The day of the premiere came around quickly, Chris had been doing press for the past couple of days and you had spent most of your time exploring the cities sights. Chris held true to his word and didn’t change his mind about you walking the carpet with him. He had been a ball of nervous energy since you had woken up, you had left him eating breakfast to go take a shower and start getting ready for your day.

When you came out of the bathroom towel wrapped around you tightly, wet hair loose and ready to be dried you had found him pacing the hotel room in his underwear trying to keep himself busy, it was something that would put most people on edge but you had seen this so many times before with him, always getting in his head, always doubting himself and usually you were able to talk him down easily, but this time you had decided to try a different method.

Calling his name you let go of the grip you had on your towel letting it drop to the ground as he looked up having not previously noticed you had come back into the room, freezing instantly eyeing the curve of your body, a slight smirk across his face.

“What’s this for” he laughed as he closed the gap between you, hands finding your hips as you rested yours on his chest.

“You needed to get out of your head” you whispered as your lent up to kiss him, one hand sliding down his chest and finding its way into his boxers taking his length in your hand and stroking it slowly as you felt it harden beneath your grip. You pecked his lips before dropping to your knees on the plush hotel carpet pulling his boxers down with you. You pumped him a few more times with your hand before letting your tongue lick over his head tasting the saltiness of pre-cum. You took him halfway into your mouth, letting your warmth surround him before pulling off and sliding your tongue along the underside of his cock. Surrounding him with your mouth once more, this time dropping down deeper and with more intent, you hand finds its way to play with his balls, Chris letting out a breathy moan. You started to bob your head up and down as his hand found its way into your hair guiding you as his hips began to thrust, his tip hitting the back of your throat with each movement. It didn’t take long before he was warning you that he was about to cum, and cum he did, hard and fast right down your throat as you swallowed the taste of him before letting his cock slide out of your mouth. Chris pulled you up from the floor crashing his mouth into yours, tasting the remnants of himself on your tongue as he guided you back to the bed determined to make you cum just as hard as he had.

An hour later you found yourself in the shower for the second time that day, this time joined by Chris. You took your time, him massaging shower gel onto your back, while you reached up lathering and rinsing out the shampoo from his hair. You made sure to gently scrape your fingers along his scalp the way you knew, from many nights laying on the couch fingers curled in his hair as he fell asleep in your arms, relaxed him. Once you got out of the shower you realized Chris’ stylist and the hair and make up artist you had insisted on hiring yourself would be showing up any second.

By the time you were in the car waiting to pull up to the carpet Chris had seemingly relaxed, he held your hand the entire car ride over but you knew he was in a much better place mentally and that the second he got out he would turn on his charm and have everyone eating out of the palm of his hand the way he always did. When it was time to get out of the car Chris stepped out first leaning in to offer you his hand as you stepped out behind him, you could here the gasps of fans and media alike, all surprised that Hollywood’s most eligible bachelor had bought a date. Chris had pulled you into his side at the photo area, his hand on your hip as you placed yours on his chest posing for the cameras. You had been surprisingly pretty calm about the whole thing until that moment, cameras flashing in your face and paparazzi screaming from behind their barricade for you to look in twelve directions at once. It was overwhelming and something you don't think you could ever get fully used to.

“Just breathe” He whispered to you out of the side of his mouth, knowing that you had started to spiral.

After what felt like an hour but was probably ten minutes Chris’ team moved you along to the press portion of the carpet, you had expected to just stand back with the team while Chris answered questions from reporters from all of the different networks and publications but he had refused to let go of your hand as he approached the first reporter so you found yourself next to him through it all. Of course the first question was about you, and you just knew every headline tomorrow would mention it. It used to frustrate you, how the media would hone in on any female he was seen with, making the story about that and not the hard work he was doing, but you knew they were just trying to sell papers, page click and views.

“So who do you have here with you today” the reporter smiled tilting her head in your direction

“This is my best friend” Chris started before motioning for you to finish, that was one of the many things you had always loved about Chris, he never wanted you to feel like you were in his shadow, you had your own voice and you could use it. You introduced yourself to the reporter who asked a few questions about how you met and then switched to talking about the movie. After a few more interviews that went in a similar fashion you were escorted into the theatre for the screening, Chris took your hand as the two of you sat side by side in the theatre waiting for the film to start. You had enjoyed it a lot and really loved seeing this side of Chris’ acting ability. When the movie was done he joined some of the cast at the front of the theatre for a quick question and answer session for the attendees before you all headed to the after party.

Chris had introduced you to some of his cast mates, and reintroduced you to a few you had met previously during a quick visit to set one afternoon. You had downed a few glasses of champagne by the time you were ready to leave the party, tipsy but not quite drunk. The two of you found your way back to your hotel, and you laughed as you entered the elevator remembering something you had thought about mid interview earlier that day.

“What?” Chris laughed pushing the button for your floor and leaning against the back of the elevator, as you pulled off the heels that you hadn’t realized until that moment were killing your feet.

“Earlier...I almost made the worst comment in the middle of that E! Interview”

“....oh god what were you gonna say?” He chuckled, amused at your tipsy candour.

“Well you introduced me as your friend...”

“Yeah....” Chris laughed, looking at you as if to say that’s what we agreed on.

“Well, you say we are just friends, but friends...friends don’t know the way that you taste” you smirked at him pointedly, both remembering the activities of that morning.

Chris burst out laughing, his full belly laugh, hand coming up to his chest before reach across and pulling you into him, placing a kiss on your nose as the elevator doors opened on your floor.

“True” he mumbled before leading you down the hallway to your room, “that is true” he had one hand in yours the other holding your heels that he must have picked up on the way out of the elevator. “Well, how about next time I call you something else?” He started tone playful “This is my fuck buddy, no my slam piece, no thats too informal he laughed, girlfriend? No, hmm” He opened the hotel room door letting you slide in past him as he reached around to flip on the light switch closing the door behind him.

You stopped in the entry way a gasp leaving your lips. The room was filled with flowers. The pink and white Chrysanthemums filled every spare counter space, they had always been your favorite and Chris had sent you some for every birthday without fail. There were fairy lights lining the room and a small cart with a bottle of champagne on ice and chocolate covered strawberries by the window.

You turned back to Chris, your heart racing only he wasn’t where you expected....

“How about Wife?” Your eyes connected with his, where he was knelt on the floor behind you an open green velvet ring box in hand.

“What” was all you could get out.

“How about next time I call you my Wife. Marry Me?” Chris said, laughing at the shocked expression on your face “I’ve loved you for almost 20 years now, you’re the best thing in my life, and I never want to be without you...”

“Yes.” You said before you could even really think about it. “Yes!?!” You repeated realizing what was happening as Chris pulled the ring out of the box, sliding it onto your finger quickly before standing up to kiss you.

You’re not sure how long you stood there in the entry way making out, but when you pulled away you noticed that Chris’ eyes, like yours, were a little damp as you went to run your thumb across his cheek you caught a glimpse of the ring on your hand realizing you had barely even looked at it before it was on your hand. Chris pressed his lips into your hair holding you to his chest as you admired it. It was beautiful, delicate, subtle, it was just the kind of ring you would have chosen for yourself.

“Do you like it” Chris whispered into your hair

“I love it” you smiled up at him, lightly pressing your lips to his

“I love you” he smiled, not letting go of you.

“I love you too bestie” you giggled as he grabbed you around the waist lifting you over his shoulder and tapping your ass lightly as he took off towards the bedroom.

[jiminrings]

petition for stem koo to do all the things for oc he originally said no one does (make her lunchboxes, makes her cheerful...) bc i think that’s a beautiful redemption arc

cold senior!y/n x stem major!koo masterlist :D

jungkook's day one of his redemption agenda doesn't go that well in the end

"namjoon!!! my man. got any updates for me?"

seokjin strolls coolly on the way to his office, hair slicked back and his dress shirt definitely missing more than a few buttons

what's head admin gonna do??? dress-code him???

fire him???? PLS HE'D BE BETTER OFF!!!!

jin makes student affairs his bitch,,, not the other way around

"for the last time, i am nOt your secretary!!" namjoon stresses as he ceases his typing just to glare at him

he's the university registrar and everyone needs to go through him and at this point he's like a historical landmark from how he's made impact in less than two years

and he and seokjin graduated from the same batch!!!! they're the uncanny always pair for the subjects they shared together

it was definitely weird but functional lol cause one is uptight yet hardworking and the other's relaxed yet smart

sue them for working in the same place they swore they'd never go back to after graduation </3

"if you say-"

"some kid's been waiting for you even before i opened the office. made him sit inside but i just told him that he'd be expelled if he even tries to touch your coffee machine."

namjoon says even before jin could finish the sentence, clearly holding that in until the last minute

jin's obviously a lil annoyed because he's starting work as early as now but the way that joon laid all that out on him is a highlight for him

"thanks. knew you're a secretary for me first and a registrar second."

"no. i'm a national citizen before-"

alright alright he's not listening anymore

this bETTER be important because jin has to hold out his morning routine for whoever this kid is

"what can i possibly do for you today?" he rubs his eyes in preparation, intentionally dragging his steps because just looking at how near he is to his work computer gives him vertigo

"mr. kim!!!"

no

there is no way

there is no fATHOMABLE way that this has got to be happening to seokjin right now

"..... jungkook. what a pleasure."

he sits on his chair, voice gritted and monotone and he could just feel his eye twitching, his clenched fist under his deck now flipping off the kid in secret

it's a last-minute realization that he grasps that jungkook doesn't know you're his friend and it presents some really unique vantage points

like the time that seokjin recounted about a ridiculous student's filing for theft of his lunchboxes and he turned out to be your crush

or when he used his student affairs capabilities and pulled up resources left and right when jungkook broke your heart then seriously contemplated about messing up his academic record

or that time when he delivered a high and sleepy you to bed and then heard the entire conversation (if you could even call it that) between yoongi and this fucking nerd

"i need your help, mr. kim. you're the closest one to me i could ask!!" jungkook pleads desperately, the big doe eyes not really inducing an effect on him whatsoever lmao

"mhmm. i may not be the person for the job. counseling is right next door."

jin hums without even attempting to get jungkook to elaborate because for all he knows, his services aren't exactly open for people who hurt his friends >:(

(a guy once bumped shoulders with yoongi twice on the same day with aTTITUDE!!! and seokjin just dismissed the dude's concerns when a prof of his, who's a buddy of jin's, suddenly gave him an F)

seokjin IS student affairs

“no, no. you’re the only one who can help me!! you see, i-i just feel this brotherly connection with you and-“

“we talked once.”

god what did you used to see in this kid??

a crybaby aND an easily-attached personality to him? god it’s like jungkook’s just asking jin to pick on him

jungkook doesn’t seem to pick up how jin’s making it obvious he really doesn’t want to be of help if it has something to do with him

he likes interrupting and jin’s just the perfect match to interrupt him even earlier so now they just sound like one of those dubsmash snippets

“MR. KIM!!! how do you make lunchboxes? i don't know how.”

jeez where are his manners :O aren’t nerds like him supposed to worship the ground that admins walk on,,,

but what did pique his attention is the content of what jungkook just said

.... lunchboxes?

jin doesn’t want to give the kid benefit of the doubt because the last time he did that, you got hurt!!!!

if he has to hear hyeji’s name one more time, he’d really waste no time in stripping jungkook’s name from the honor roll

“remember that time i thought someone was stealing my lunchboxes?” he quizzes jin like it’s his job, clueless how he’s poking the bear even more with where he decides to go with this, “yeah. turns out no one was.”

was that not made clear the first time around!!!!!! he knows for a fact that a uni student would trade a classmate for a pack of gum but nO ONE would go for stealing a lunchbox

no one wakes up one day and decides that they’d steal a lunchbox. literally none

“but then this random girl claimed that it was hers a-and well i-...”

kook pauses to gauge jin’s reaction, clearly seeing now the one brow that’s raised at him

oh so if jungkook just asked him how to make a lunchbox, and he called h-word random,,,, then that would mean-

“i may have hurt the original giver of my lunchboxes at the process.”

.... that means he’s asking how to make a lunchbox for you

well that was a pleasant surprise

seokjin snorts briefly at that, dryly chuckling with his eyes widening to stress out his “non-threat” that’s pretty mUCH a threat

“wow. i might just give you a sanction for that.”

does he think jungkook’s a good person? lol he has to think about that for a month

was he wrong for hurting you that way? ultimately yes

but did he think at some point that jungkook’s completely heartless and wouldn’t try to redeem himself to his senior? no, not completely

but is he still on your team, regardless if the kid begs for mercy and you forgive him? yea a hundred percent :D yoongi and seokjin could never be brought out from your circle

"and you're doing this why?"

this is a no-brainer question for jungkook but the question still spooks him, feeling the chills at his neck that responding to seokjin is like a sTEPPING STONE when it comes to you

lmao if only he knew

"i uh, i just really wanna make this right. i messed up completely and it's pretty much unforgivable, but i atleast wanna try and give my best even if she doesn't forgive me, y'know?"

interesting

"mhmm. right, right."

???

he's still mad but he appreciates that jeon's doing the bare minimum of redeeming himself

speaking of, the poor kid looks like he's pissing himself because he may have just embarrassed himself with how long the silence stretches out

maybe,,, just maybe jin's gonna try and be a bridge this time

but like as soon as jungkook lacks for a fourth of a second, seokjin would BURN that bridge faster than a blink

"well first of all, you buy a lunchbox."

RIGHT RIGHT

:O

jungkook grabs a literal pocket notebook and jin pretends he didn't see that because WHO the hell does that!!!!

"of course... okay, proceed!! i'm taking notes," jungkook nods in understanding, jotting down the very important advice of not ordering from online because you can't smell the material through a screen

p.s. smelling containers before you buy them is a VITAL thing to do!! it already tells you about the quality at the first sniff

"are you buying one?"

"buying one for every day of the week. i'm thinking if i should get extras too-

"good idea. i recommend buying eight."

alright seokjin's mentioning some very specific colors and schemes and jungkook's not complaining!!!

MAYBE HE'S ONTO SOMETHING!!!

"what meals should i make? i don't even know what she likes!! and even if i knew what, how would i make it?"

why is his heart racing

yoongi may have taught you how to do your taxes but jin taught you how to cook food that's more than four steps!!!

he taught you how to not flinch at all when you're frying and that's the equivalent of raising you to be the woman that you are now <3

look at him and yoongi being your best friends!! teaching you about taxes and being unnerved at cooking oil and busting out a smoke ring or two <3

in fact, the lunches you've cooked for jungkook are all inspired and derived by seokjin!!!

the fact that jungkook's plan isn't bad and the way everything pieces together with his insight,,,, goosebumps luv

"....hypothetically? what i think she'd like?"

jungkook eagerly nods with stars in his eyes, fingers gripping onto his pen for dear life as he tries to channel all his listening techniques into this lecture

"get a bigger notepad."

:O

wow

"look at you!!" yoongi gushes the moment he sees you, waiting at you from the front door

you're going back to your classes again :D

you don't look as worse as you did four days ago!! you're not as sluggish and as animated too

"please don't," you snort as yoongi doesn't seem to stop looking at you like you've saved the world, giving no fight when he insists on carrying your backpack to your first class of the day

the past four days,, yeah they were undoubtedly rough

you slept as much as you could and for the moments you weren't dejected enough to be awake, you spent it surrounding yourself with seokjin and yoongi as much as possible

that's the beauty of hanging out them!!! you're not required to have a single thought lmao

except for the time when yoongi wondered aloud how eels even live and die (or if they even do???) in the first place and that sent everyone in a spiral and you didn't think of jungkook for a single seconds

you're not intimidated to go back to regular programming or with the fact that it's nOT unlikely you'd see a glimpse of jungkook in the hall and such

but that does mean that even if you're the bigger person, you're still gonna avoid him for as long as you could

speaking of!!!! you're looking for the person now that you're eager to find

"taehyung!!"

there he is :D you'd recognize that fluffy mop of permed hair anywhere

"y/n!!"

tae jumps over chairs in excitement to finally see you again after being so worried for you, engulfing you in a hug immediately

alright you see why yoongi thinks he's a golden retriever

you're clearly not a touchy-feely person but you'd let this one pass,, tae helped you (even indirectly) throughout your downtime anyways

"thank you so much for the cookies. i tried taking smaller bites just because i didn't wanna have them disappear that easy," you confess sheepishly, knowing how you had to pull the i just got my heart broken like two days ago multiple times so the two menaces would stop stealing from your stash

:D

jungkook's excited!!!! seokjin may have given him a tip that "he felt it in his gut" that you were gonna go to class today

he came a little late because he wanted to perfect the very loaded lunchbox that's in his backpack right now

oh weird

you're not in your usual chair

bUT jungkook sees a glimpse of your hair and he's certain that you're there and his heart may be beating out of his ribcage

a baby peach lunchbox with a sticker (of what seokjin said he thought you'd like) on the middle of the lid :D

pork katsudon with furikake rice aND coffee jelly pudding on the side!!! it was definitely pressure-racking to strictly adhere to jin's recipe but god does it look worth it

jungkook's only did miniature taste tests on it and he had to stop himself from devouring the lunch that he's made specifically for you

the lunchbox itself is tied neatly with a silk wrap, adding his touch of sewing your name visibly on it aND there's a scribble taped to the lid too

god jungkook really can't wait to make it up to you

sheesh that was one of THEE longest lectures you've ever felt you had

it was actually the same amount of time it's always been but maybe you've been out of practice from just staying at your dorm for days

tae's great company but he could be a little bit chatty!!! you just nod when you feel his voice go up and he apparently gets excited by that easily

.... he apparently also has a small bladder and he told you that within the whole hour of class

"hold on. i gotta pee before next period. go without me!!!' taehyung hurriedly slings his backpack to his arm, looking ridiculous in a rush

tae's sometimes unintentionally funny because you don't even share next period anyways

you're on your way to the exit when a shiny scarf catches the corner of your eye, having to squint at it because wow does it look pretty

is that-

is that your nAME???

you pick it up before you could even rationalize it, realizing then what it was wrapping when you feel the warmth on your hands

:")

"sorry i forgot my headband!!!"

taehyung stumbles back into the room, catching his breath to run back to his seat and fetch the headband he took from his hair to play with awhile ago

he looks shocked to see what's on your hands, flicking his gaze between you and the item but he doesn't think much of it

wOW that's a really shiny scarf!!!

"tae?"

"hmm yeah? what's up?"

he's about to jog back to the comfort room because he hasn't really relieved himself yet, not bearing to leave his headband in the room when anyone could snatch it up

you raise your lunchbox, a thankful gaze on your eyes that looks so close to crying which is why tae's mORE than lost now

"thanks for the lunch."

..

.....

jungkook could only helplessly watch.

[songmingisthighs]

[14.01] hongjoong × roadie!reader × yunho

⇀ when hongjoong realized you've been spending quite some time with yunho, he felt threatened. you thought he'd appreciate you more than this, but boy did he have to prove you wrong once again.

⇁ tw : joong being an asshole

⇁ part 1 / 2 / 3

Feeling lighter than usual, you walked into Hongjoong's studio with a spring in your steps, obviously showcasing your happiness. Maybe it was the weather that day, maybe it was the favourite shirt you wore. Or maybe it was the fact that you were at a very lovely low-key lunch with Yunho.

Ever since the unfortunate event a couple of weeks ago (i.e. Hongjoong leaving you behind and Yunho rescuing you), you had been spending quite some time with Yunho. When you both went out to get dinner that day, he had somehow convinced you to give him your phone number.

You had your reservations initially, telling him that it wouldn't feel right for someone with your status as a nobody to have an idol's number. But he sweet-talked you by saying that he doesn't have many friends other than his pre-existing group of friends that he formed back when he was still just a trainee. He put on his best puppy eyes and guilt you into promising that you'd be his friend.

Of course, he kept his words even to a stranger. You had even met his friend group.

99z was everything you assumed and even more. You've got tweedle-dee and tweedle-dum, the tsundere who's secretly a nerd, the gentle giant, and of course him, the heartthrob with bad luck in romance.

Surprisingly, you made an immediate connection with them and they dubbed you the honorary member.

Yunho had never missed a day of contacting you. Even with his very busy schedule, he never missed checking up on you. Of course, the simple gesture made you feel all warm and fluttery, you felt appreciated and cared for.

"What took you so long?"

Your train of thought broke when Hongjoong called you, eyebrows furrowing as he stared at you with a weird expression. You smiled at him nevertheless as you put the food you bought him on the side of his desk, "Sorry, I got caught up a bit," you told him vaguely.

Hongjoong kept staring at you as if you had sprouted a second head.

"You were with him, weren't you?" he asked.

You turned your body to him, nervous about what to answer. But you nodded nevertheless, confirming his assumption, "if by him you meant Yunho, then yeah, I was," you said.

Seeing how happy you looked after a short lunch with Yunho somehow struck something in Hongjoong. He felt his left eye twitch as he scoffed, "You've really been neglecting what you promised to do around here," he complained.

Initially, you thought he was just joking or being sarcastic, so you shrugged it off by chuckling. It wasn't until a few moments later that you realized he was being serious.

With furrowed eyebrows, you decided to make sure that you weren't imagining things, "Are you serious? You really think I've been neglecting my duties? The duties I've been doing so splendidly with minimum pay since the beginning of your gig?" you didn't mean to sound harsh, but it just slipped.

Hearing your harsh tone seemed to irk Hongjoong as he stood to size you up with his hands on either side of his waist. If it weren't for the sudden tension, you would've surely broken into a fit of giggles by now.

"Yes, because if you haven't noticed, you've been nowhere around when I needed you to do things for me," he stated so daringly. You sighed in an attempt to remain calm, "Hongjoong, I don't think you realize that I do have my hours. I've always been present during working hours, more than other people in fact. Other than your manager who works 24 hours a day, seven days a week, four weeks a month, and twelve months a year, I work from eight to eight, sometimes twelve if things are crazy, six days a week. But I've never taken a day off because I know you'd need me," you told him.

Maybe it was the heat of the moment, or maybe it was his anxiety talking, but Hongjoong didn't know why he uttered his next words. By God, he could swear that he blacked out momentarily.

"Then maybe I don't need you," he spat. Your eyes widened, unable to believe what he just said to you. But he wasn't even close to being done.

Hongjoong looked at you with such intensity that you could take it as hate. "You said you wanted to be my roadie because you admired me and you wanted to be a part of my crew, but what are you doing now? You're slacking off to cater for a guy who you barely know. Isn't that just pathetic?" he scoffed.

At the mention of being pathetic, something finally snapped in you. You felt your left eye twitch, there was something bubbling in your stomach and you felt like you were going to puke.

Before you could even stop yourself, you slapped Hongjoong across his face.

When he registered the impact, he stared at you with eyes wide as saucers. The expression on your face was one he had never seen before. Around him, you were always bright and smiley, never had you showed him your anger or annoyance.

"Me hanging with Yunho is pathetic? PATHETIC!?" you asked, voice getting louder by the second. Hongjoong so wanted to reply with something snarky, but the slap you delivered seemed to have shocked him more than he would ever care to admit.

"You know what's pathetic, Hongjoong? Me following you around for two years. You had never spared me a glance, never thanked me for anything, and you even belittled me for literally EVERYTHING I do. THAT's pathetic, Hongjoong. I knew Yunho for like what, half a month? And not only had he thanked me even for small things, but he also asked me about my day and my feelings, Joong! I know! What a concept, right?" you told him sarcastically.

The situation was rather foreign to him. None of his staff had ever told him off like this. Or at all for that matter.

Hongjoong opened his mouth to defend himself but you raised a hand to stop him from saying anything else and continued, "I... I have always admired you, Joong. I never stopped. Not even when you humiliated me in the staff meeting by calling me an obsessive delusional fan, not when you called me a tone-deaf lay when I had an opinion about that one song your CEO didn't even let you release, and not when you left me at that broadcast station because YOU were pissy, so don't you question my loyalty when you're supposed to question your manners and actions towards the person who you know cares about you more than just as an idol but also as a person,"

You spoke at such speed that you couldn't even remember what you told him.

But saying all that felt like such a relief. It was such a rush that you never thought you'd be able to feel.

It was exciting, your mind had never been clearer, and your chest never felt lighter. There was a fluttering feeling in your stomach and your heart beat faster than before. Suddenly you felt like you could do anything you want, anything at all. Then a thought popped into your head, an idea that never popped into your mind until that very second, an idea that you know was right for you.

Without thinking twice, you blurted out.

"I quit," you told him.

Hongjoong's eyes widened and his mouth opened and closed like a fish. He never thought that you'd ever quit on him yet there you were, proving him wrong for the second time that day.

As you processed what you had just told him, you exhaled shakily and nodded your head, "I fucking quit, Joong! I-I-I- I'm gonna go out there and do something where I'd be appreciated, where I can make my own mark, you know?" as you spoke, you walked closer to him and when you were toe-to-toe with him, you grabbed his hands and gave him a gentle smile, "thank you so much for everything, Hongjoong. Without you, I don't think I would've gotten here in the first place, take care, okay?" you told him genuinely.

Before he could question how serious you were being, you leaned in and gave him a peck on his cheek. A peck that to you, was a symbol of you finally moving on to the next chapter in your life, whereas to Hongjoong it was a symbol of his screwup.

The peck you left him lingered for a bit before you pulled away. Your lips felt warm and comfortable on his skin, it made him feel fluttery inside. Which was why he was so dejected when you pulled away to give him one last goodbye.

"I hope you'll keep being great and you'd find the perfect people to work with, Joong," you told him as a single tear dropped from one of your eyes without you even realizing it.

As your hand left his, Hongjoong's chest suddenly felt heavy. As you turned your back and walked out, most likely forever, out of his studio and his life, Hongjoong's head suddenly spun. And when the door of his studio slammed shut behind you, Hongjoong felt like something cracked in him.

You left that day with much hope and excitement.

Whereas Hongjoong felt like the sturdy pillar that was supposed to support him was demolished by a wrecking ball and he didn't know what to do with the foreign feeling.

[happyandticklish]

Disarming Your Demons

Notes: Okay, so I’m only halfway through Jujutsu Kaisen, but I had an idea and I had to write it down. I’m not sure if I’m gonna write anything else for it until I actually finish the show, but I said that before and now this exists, so who knows really. 

Summary: Itadori discovers a new method to deal with misbehaving curses. 

Sharing a body with a thousand-year-old curse could have its downfalls, something Itadori was quickly becoming familiar with. Though he could control it most of the time, it was difficult, and took a strain on his mind and body. He put on a brave face afterwards, insisting that it was no big deal, but the truth was anything but. Sukuna’s ability to switch out with him was growing stronger, and the exhaustion was setting in faster now with each time Itadori wrestled back control over his body. In the heat of battle was one thing, edged on by desperation and the will to keep his friends alive. But it was the other times, when Itadori was tired and vulnerable and fully unprepared to battle his literal inner demons, that he regretted the lifestyle most.

Say, for instance, in his dorm room, half-asleep and dreary from a battle earlier that day.

“Hello again.”

Switching out with Sukuna was strange. He didn’t feel it in a physical sense, no pain or sensation inflicted upon him. One moment he was in his body, and the next he was trapped, a helpless bystander to the other’s will.

“You know, it’s awfully bold of those teachers of yours to leave you all alone like this at night.” Sukuna stood, stretching his arms above his head in satisfaction. “Do they really put so much stock in you to assume you’d be able to fight me, like this?”

“Sukuna.” Itadori’s voice was inaudible to anyone who might be passing by, an aimless thought floating around in his consciousness, but he knew the other could hear him nonetheless. “Give me back my body!”

“Please,” Sukuna dismissed, waving one hand as he strolled around the dorm, examining objects with a vague curiosity. “After you used me earlier? I’m growing rather tired of this dynamic, you know. Only ever summoning me when you need your friend healed, or a new big baddie rears its odious head. Then, afterwards, you hide me away without so much as a thank you.”

“I do appreciate your help,” Itadori started carefully, trying to keep his tone neutral. It was difficult though, when the other could easily read his true thoughts. “But you can’t expect me to simply hand my body over like some kind of puppet. I know what your true intentions are, and I won’t let you harm my friends or anyone else.”

“Oh, of course not, not heroic, selfless Itadori.” He placed a hand on the doorknob, twisting it and pushing the door open with one hand. “I wonder what would happen if I went to pay them a little visit now?”

“No!”

“Oh? Don’t like that, do you. Then why don’t you do something about it? Force me back, take over your body once more.” Sukuna chuckled dryly, pausing in the doorway. “If you can, that is. Don’t think I haven’t noticed the toll this is taking on you. Do you really think you have the strength to best me now, when you’re tired and weak from battle?”

Itadori tried, he really did. He knew he had to do this, but Sukuna was right. In his current state, he could hardly focus enough to remain present enough to speak to the other, let alone reclaim his physical form. With his last remaining willpower, he managed to gather enough strength to take control of one arm before he found himself blocked by the other. 

Sukuna’s eyes widened, and then he laughed, a throaty, derisive thing that made Itadori clench the fist he had. “One arm? Is that it? You truly are in for it now. I must say, I am impressed though. I didn’t think you had even that in you. Still, it’s no matter. I could end your world as you know it with both my hands tied behind my back. This pathetic defense is but a pebble in my path. I must thank you for the amusing display though—I needed a good laugh.”

Itadori watched helplessly as his body moved forward against his will, his mind racing as he tried to think of anything he could do in his position.

I needed a good laugh.

That was it!

Itadori would have smiled if he could use his mouth. An idea was formulating in his mind, crazy and nonsensical, but possibly just the thing he needed. It was a method that Gojo had employed once, to train him to focus on maintaining curse energy and resist distractions. He had no idea if the same thing would work on Sukuna, but seeing as he was in his body and therefore should be just as susceptible as Itadori had been, it just might work.

Sukuna stopped short as a jolt of sensation shot through him, and he snapped his head down to see his own hand squeezing his hip. “What the hell?”

“Ha! I didn’t think it would actually work!” Itadori’s voice rang out triumphant through the other’s mind as he squeezed again and again, quick and sudden so that Sukuna had no time to adjust to them. “Who knew that my own ticklishness would come in handy one day?”

“Tickli—what?” Sukuna started in confusion, but quickly slapped his other hand to his mouth to hold back… was that laughter?

He stumbled back against the wall, torn between shoving the other’s hands away and holding back the embarrassing noises leaking between his fingers. It was in times like these that he missed his four arms. It was hard enough to work with only two arms—one was impossible.

“W-What are you d-dohoing?” Sukuna grunted, trying to sound intimidating despite the silly grin quickly taking hold of his features.

“Tickling you, duh.” It was weird tickling his own body, and weirder still to have the sensation disconnected from him. He could feel the AC in the hallway on his arm, and the warmth of his hip under his hand, but that was all. It was disconcerting, but Itadori was grateful for it in this moment. He wasn’t sure he would’ve been able to continue if he could feel everything the other was feeling. He could only imagine how Sukuna was managing to stop himself from collapsing into an Itadori-sized puddle of laughter on the ground. “Haven’t you ever heard of tickling before?”

“I-Is that some k-kind of hihidden Jujutsu?” Sukuna snapped angrily, annoyed at the chuckle that had slipped into his words halfway through.

Laughter rang through his head, unhelpfully as Sukuna tried to hold back his own. “Dude, what? Of course not! Tickling is… well, it’s a human thing you know? When you lightly touch the human body, like this—” he scribbled his fingers up his sides suddenly—“They laugh! I’m not sure why though… science is still a bit iffy on that.”

Sukuna had stopped listening at this point. He had burst into panicked giggles the second Itadori touched his side, unprepared for the other’s change in strategy. Sukuna’s hand come down, wrapping around his wrist and pulling it up, away from his sides.

He drew in an exhausted breath, grinning in relief as he held the other firmly away from him. “There. Your… tickling, or whatever it is, is ineffectual now. Seems like you didn’t think this plan through, did you now?”

He was right. It was a temporary solution, but the truth was that Itadori was going to get nowhere with just one hand. Which was why…

Sukuna’s eyes widened as he felt a sudden pull at his person once more. His body was rebelling, and he fought back, trying to push back at Itadori’s attempt to switch back. He was getting stronger now, and Itadori was still weak, so it should be nothing to keep control from the brat. What he hadn’t expected was for Itadori to focus all his energy on reclaiming a single part of his body, leaving Sukuna unprepared for the concentrated force. He felt his fingers slipping on his wrist, his left arm losing connection just like the first one had.

“No!” Sukuna growled, but it was too late. Both arms were lost to him now, and he knew if Itadori could, he would be smirking.

“Yes,” Itadori countered. Surprisingly enough, he kept his one arm raised. He lowered the other one, poising his fingers under his arms and wiggling them in the air threateningly. “I remember this always being one of my worst spots. Unfortunately for you, I’m afraid.”

Sukuna narrowed his eyes in confusion, but before he could say anything he was stopped by the sensation of nails gently spidering under his arm. It was a slow, unhurried process, that never missed its mark. Instinct shot through him like a bullet and Sukuna attempted to bring his arm down protectively. He was stopped by the other’s remaining control of the limb, which kept it raised exposed and vulnerable over his head. It didn’t help that Itadori hadn’t worn a shirt to bed the previous night, so Itadori had full access to his bare torso.

Sukuna spluttered over a laugh, a hysterical cackling that only grew in desperation as time went on. Sparks flurried through him, his stomach erupting with what felt like millions of butterflies all taking off at the same time. It was impossible to explain how unbearable the feeling was, and Sukuna wondered how humans lived with such a weakness on their body all this time.

“A-Ahaha, stahahahap, eh, gah, stahahahap i-ihihit!” Sukuna’s head was thrown back, his eyes squeezed shut as a wild grin danced along his features. “Y-Yohohou irritahahating b-brahat!”

“Intense, right?” Itadori asked, not even trying to hide the amusement in his voice. “If only you had chosen a less ticklish vessel. You’re in for it now, though. I got to be honest, it’s kind of funny seeing a bigshot curse like you writhing around like a worm on a hook.”

“Shuhuhut uhuhuhup!” Sukuna demanded, though it came out far more giggly than he would have liked. He couldn’t concentrate like this, couldn’t even begin to start to try to reclaim his arms. He needed him to move his hand, maybe back to his hips, or somewhere else, anywhere else. He wasn’t sure if the rest of this body was less ticklish, only that he needed Itadori to move away from that spot.

“Not a chance,” Itadori scoffed. “This is way too much fun! Of course, you could always stop me. Just switch back and the tickling won’t affect you anymore; it’s that easy.”

“L-Lihihike hehehell Ihihihihi wihihihill!” He was slipping now, his body sliding down the wall in an attempt to get away. Unfortunately, you can’t run away from yourself, and those wiggling fingers followed him all the way down. “Cuhuhut ihihit ohohout wihihihith thahahat sphohohot!”

“Why?” Itadori asked innocently, loving this a bit too much for his own good. But could he really help it when he was given such a perfect oppurtunity for revenge? “Does it tickle too much for the big bad curse?”

Sukuna was going to kill him. Then, once he was sure the pest was well and truly dead, he was going to bring him back to life so he could kill him all over again. Right now, however, his focus was only on those devastating nails, light, barely-there touches that had his mind reeling. When his fingers traveled a bit too high, skittering at the top of his armpits, he finally gave in. “Yehehehes, ohohokay, ihihit tihihihickles, ohohor whahahatever y-yohou cahahalled ihihit! Sohohomewhehere ehehelse!”

“Are you sure you want me to go somewhere else?” Itadori questioned teasingly, circling the area with just one finger. Sukuna ducked his chin into his chest, unable to hold back the flood of giggles that caused. “Really sure?”

“Y-Yohohou, ahaha, yohou lihihittle—”

“Okay, okay.” Itadori moved his hand away, pulling his other arm down. Sukuna exhaled in relief, an exhausted grin still dancing on his features. Unfortunately, Itadori noticed. “Hey, don’t relax just yet. I’m not done with you. After all, you still haven’t given me back my body, have you?”

“What the hell—noHOHO!” Sukuna burst into laughter anew as his arms wrapped around himself, trapping him in a tickly hug as fingers wiggled up and down his sides. “S-SHIHIHIT!”

“Regretting your words yet?”

Sukuna thrashed wildly, howling as he doubled over in a useless attempt to protect himself. The snarky remarks were gone now, so completely was he lost to his own laughter. His skin twitched and goosebumps scattered up his sides, a helpless reaction to the playful tickling.

Because it was playful. Despite everything, he could tell that Itadori was having fun with this. And maybe, just maybe, the other was too. His insides felt warm and fuzzy in a way they hadn’t in a while, his laughter peaking between desperation and silly giggles. It was strangely addicting to give in like this, allowing the tickling to consume his thoughts and blur out any remaining negativity.

It was… nice.

“I-IIHIHITADORI!” His head was thrown back, a hearty flush spreading across his cheeks and warming his skin. “I-IHIHI CAHAHAN’T!”

“You know how to stop this,” Itadori reminded him. “Just switch back and the tickling stops.”

Sukuna fell back on the floor, unable to hold himself up against the relentless tickling. He let out a frankly embarrassing squeak, the sensations breaking through the last of his revolve. And finally, at last, he caved in.

With a start, Itadori felt the other ducking back into himself, releasing his body in the process. He stopped wiggling his fingers, sitting up slowly as he regained control of himself once more. He was sweaty and exhausted, like he’d just ran a marathon, and he could feel that familiar floating sensation in the pit of his stomach that came with being tickled.

“Damn brat,” Sukuna complained from inside him, and Itadori smiled fondly. He would have to remember this method for next time.

“What the hell?”

Itadori startled as a voice shot through his thoughts, and he glanced up to see Megumi standing in the hallway. He was still in pajamas, and his hair was sticking out in several directions. The look on his face implied he’d just woken up. The two made eye contact, Megumi taking in Itadori’s flushed features and his sprawled position on the floor.

Megumi furrowed his brows in confusion. “Itadori? I heard a noise and I thought… are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, totally,” Itadori dismissed, sitting up slowly. “I was… sleep-walking. Yeah, that’s it. Just a weird dream, that’s all. Nothing to worry about.”

Megumi continued to stare at him for a moment, clearly debating whether or not to believe the other. Finally, he sighed, rubbing his forehead tiredly. “Alright. If you say so. Just keep it down next time, will you? Some of us are actually trying to sleep.”

Itadori threw the other a hearty thumbs-up, grinning innocently. “Will do!”

Megumi frowned, but eventually disappeared back into his room, slamming the door behind him.

Itadori stood up fully, his legs a little shaky from the previous tickling, and decided to do the same. It was the middle of the night after all—sleep was probably in order. However, as he turned the knob to shut the door behind him, he heard a voice loud and clear in his head.

“Sleep tonight, young sorcerer, and get your rest. Because tomorrow—” a sudden pinch to his side as Sukuna wrestled control of his hand—“it’s your turn.”

Itadori regained control almost instantly, and his hand was his again as though nothing had happened. He smiled nervously, not doubting the other’s words for a minute.

And as he got into bed that night, pulling the covers tight around himself, he found he couldn’t wait.

[sweetpxxches]

✨Hcs or a small one shot, if you write those!✨ Just a cute thing of Tabi and a really good friend (y/n),t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶h̶e̶’̶s̶ ̶t̶o̶t̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶c̶r̶u̶s̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶o̶r̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶, engaging in a war or sorts: trying to make each other laugh or chicken out, with dirty jokes and being suggestive..Mayyybe it ends with them deciding to give into their feelings, and there’s a lil sex time? 👀

A moment of grace.

Contains: Smut!

"Tabi, is everything okay?" Was the first thing he heard when he was too busy spacing out when he was gazing upon your face, you unnoticed of his stare up until now. His body jolted, his head immediately jerking away in attempts to try and hide his blush. "Erm, yes. Everything is fine, I was just... out of thought." The two of you were sitting on a bench waiting for a ride home, you unfortunately walked your way home today so you couldn't give Tabi a ride. But this gave him the time to wonder if there was a chance he could at least get closer to you. You saw him grew nervous, you know he was assuming that he was making you uncomfortable, but you reached your hand to his to assure him. "Tabi, it's alright, you aren't creeping me out. We've been hanging out all day, remember?" He rubbed the back of his neck, sighing. "I know, but it's just... I feel like I'm pushing things too far, you know? I don't want to invade your space, and I definitely don't want you to feel awkward around me. But it's fine if you do feel that way, you aren't the first, and you won't be the la--" You squeezed his hand, brow furrowing. "Absolutely not! I won't let you feel that way around me, one way or another! You're a good man to me, Tabi, so let's just... make this night worth while, okay?"

It was silence, and it was hesitation. But long behold, Tabi sighed in response and nodded. "Of course, of course. I'll stay with you for the night, but please let me know if I'm doing anything wrong." You smiled at him, keeping the grip. "Tab, you're fine. If you were really freaking me out, I wouldn't of let you in my house, would I? Besides, I want to do stuff with you at home." That caught his attention, what did you mean by that? Is there something you're hiding from him?! His head filled up with assumptions, all he could ever connect to was, are you planning to do something with him this very night?! His eyes spaced off again, but you saw the bus driving by and you tugged Tabi to come along. It wasn't long until the two of you went to your place on the bus ride, but throughout Tabi was only assuming what could be happening.

. . .

Tabi saw himself in your living room, invited to play video games with you. There were occasions of you struggling on certain levels, but Tabi knew what he was doing, his hands holding yours as he helped guiding you around the game. Your cheeks lightly blushed in a rose tint as you noticed how careful he is with you. Tabi was rambling along the way of the gameplay, explaining the methods and the game's story, you couldn't help but smile at him being content and being himself for once other than being an anti-social rude jerk that he keeps that mask on for around others. You two weren't tired at all in that late evening, Tabi was only chuckling at your times dying in the game and he took the control from you, and playfully he wouldn't hand it back to you after he died in the game as well. He laughed as he watched you try to crawl on top of him, only for you two to end up realizing the position you were.

Tabi stared, seeing your body pressed up against his on top, and you blinked at him seeing how he was staring at you intensely again. "Tabi?" You blinked. He flinched and lightly pushed you off with the controller on your hands and crossed his arms immediately. "N-Nothing! Sorry, I apologize, I never meant to get that handsy with you." Tabi looked away. "What are you talking about? You hardly touched me, silly. We were just messing around!" You playfully nudged him with your arm, but he was trying very hard to keep himself together. "It's... It's not that." He mumbled. You paused the game, tilting your head at him. "Tabi, is everything okay?" He froze, looking at you. "I'm... fine. R-Really, I am."

"You say that but here you are shaking, come on, you're hiding something from me, aren't you?" You crossed your arms, smiling at him in a smug manner. He immediately grew defensive, sitting up. "E-Excuse me! Why would I?!" He obviously wasn't scaring you that easily, the fact he was trying to be huffy puffy with you was genuinely adorable. "Tabi, you've been staring at me all day, the way you brushed your hands against mine and the fact you tried to be funny and got immediately nervous when you succeeded, Tabi, you can just say you like me." He tugged his hat over his skull, huffing. "Stop, I know, it's embarrassing, creepy, and weird, and--"

"I like you too, Tabi." You smiled.

"... You. Do." He looked through his hat, blinking. "You do?" Tabi repeated. "Yes, I do, Tabi. And you don't need to worry about how you are around me, I love the way that you are. Even if you are a hothead at others, doesn't scare me at all!" You reached to hold his hand, and for once his fingers coiled with yours, the moment of serenity washing over him. "... Right." Was all he could mutter. You giggled, tugging him over. "Tabi, lift the skull up, will ya?" He immediately flinched at that response. "What?! But there's nothing there- I have nothing! How will you even-" You cut him off once more, lifting his skull that he had kept to hide the fact he was invisible, your hands holding his cheeks, to feel them and find his lips. Tabi was silent the whole time, but he was nervous, he didn't want to ruin this moment, but he had no other choice but to let you venture. Your thumb brushed his lower lip, and you leaned in to give him a kiss, a shock of joy and fear filled Tabi, and his only response was to hold your hips. "Y-You really find every chance to get what you want, don't you?" Tabi commented as you held your head back, and you smirked. "C'mon, Tabi. I'll give you some affection I've been dying to give you since we've met."

. . .

This was the first time he's ever done this with someone before, invisible of course. The first time he had intimacy was with Girlfriend, who he regret even giving that sense of trust to ever since she backstabbed him. But this is different, you were different, you never wanted to put him through high expectancy and still hurt him for failing you once. He's messed up so many times, but you forgive him and you worked with him, and that was all he could ever ask for. Now there you were, sitting on top of his lap giving him passionate kisses as your hands gently rubbed his groin, making his legs twitch from time to time in your bedroom. This was the first time you've seen him this way, allowing you to touch him, the way his body warms up as you kiss from his lips down to his neck, he couldn't help but purr. His hands were under your pants, tugging down both the garments with it. You found it cute that he was a bit impatient, but you didn't want to waste time yourself either. "Tabi," you leaned back, hands on his chest to let him get comfortable against the bed, "I'm gonna do most of the work, okay? You sit tight." He looked up at you, nodding quietly. "Of course."

You kissed him once more, your kisses trailing down to his neck, then his chest, and you crept down to his crotch. You can tell he was getting desperate, his bulge throbbing in need of you. You bit your lip, unzipping his pants to let his cock out. He was embarrassed though, because he knew you can't see it, but you don't care. But with it out, your thought to yourself was 'How big exactly is it?' The only way you can find that out was to suck him off. You held his shaft, carefully stroking it. Tabi gripped the bed sheets, trying not to get ahead of himself. He muttered your name, feeling his cock get hard from your touch alone. You smiled, spoiling his cock with kisses, but as your reached for the tip, you've realized something... this man's huge. Your eyes lightly lit up at the realization, but you didn't want to back down now. Swallowing your concerns, you began to put his cock in your mouth, your eyes shut as you felt him throb again from excitement. His hands crept their way your hair, getting a gentle grip on you. Your one eye opened up at him, and you closed it again as you knew he wanted more, your head moving down forward. As you did so, you heard Tabi's breathing grow louder, his hand gripping tighter. You loved how desperate he was getting, the way his body moved up for you, you couldn't help but put your hands on the rest of his shaft, bobbing your head back and forth as your hand stroked along with it. Tabi moaned your name, his hips moving up to have his whole cock in your throat. Your eyes widened as you felt him take control.

Though as you felt him getting rough, you moved along with him, hearing the loud adorable moans he was muttering. His hips thrust one last time, filling your mouth with his cum. Cursing in Russian, he kept your head still, making you gag slightly from his large size taking up your throat. But as he began to calm down, you held your head back to breathe, letting the excess of his cum drip on your chest. Tabi looked down to see you in a mess, and he couldn't help but grow excited again. You giggled at his cock throbbing back into an erect place, you moving back up to level above his lap. "You're fucking cute, you know that Tabi?"

"Please just put it in already." Was all he could ask. You smiled, leveling yourself against his cockhead against your entrance, and the moment you slipped it in entirely, Tabi leaned back up to give you a messy kiss, you felt his tongue slide inside your mouth as he grabbed your rear to make you move your hips. As you did so, he kept his focus all on you. He's in love with you, and that was given. The sounds of you bouncing on him, as his moans continued and your own matching with his, he couldn't help but push you back, him on top of you. You gasped, seeing the glint in his eye changed. He didn't want to waste time, nor did you. You felt him thrust deeper inside of you, hitting your g-spot as he held your wrists up. "T-Tabi, I'm almost gonna cum--!" You squeaked as you felt him reach down to your neck, giving it a harsh bite. From the pain of his bite, you couldn't help but reach your climax, his cock then thrusting harder inside of you feeling your body quiver. He then reached his own ecstasy, thrusting deep within you to fill you with his cum once more, the warmth making you sweat. With a satisfied grunt, he pulled out, flopping on the other side of the bed, huffing to himself.

"S-Shit, Tabi, you did a number on me." You wheezed, sitting up to see him just looking like he did something he never thought would happened. You couldn't help but laugh, coming over to pull him into a hug. "C'mere, you. I think you're done for today." Tabi blinked back into reality, seeing you were hugging him with your head pressed against his chest. He couldn't help but stare again, then smiled softly. His hand gently stroked your head, and his other arm pulled you into a complete hug. "T-Thank you for this moment between us..." Tabi sighed, leaning his head on top of yours.

"Of course, I love you, Tabi."

"... I love you just as much, love."

[onceuponastory]

boyfriend - bucky barnes x y/n

"I love everything about you girl, don't you understand? I love you from head to toe girl, but I hate your boyfriend" - boyfriend: lou bega yes mambo no. 5 lou bega

Plot: Bucky is in love with his best friend Y/N. But unfortunately, his best friend has a boyfriend, and Bucky hates his guts. Warnings: Alcohol, some violence (but no abuse) and a small mention of sex. Also a small spoiler for TFATWS finale - just Sam's new job. Notes: So, my first Bucky fic is here! I've loved this song for a long time, and I listened to it again last week, and this fic was born. I recommend you listen to the song, because it's so upbeat and catchy, and I've tried to reflect that in this fic by making it more funny than angsty...but there is some angst ;) Oh also, Lou keeps calling the girl darling in the song, which is definitely a thing Bucky would do I think.

Also this is at least 7k words, probably even more. So sit back, relax and enjoy!

As Bucky Barnes watches his best friend Y/N sing to herself as she moves around her apartment, he smiles. The two of them have been friends for almost two years by this point, and hang out together almost every day. And for almost two years, Bucky Barnes has been head over heels in love with her. He loves everything about her: her smile, how gorgeous she looks, her sunny disposition, the way she’s the only one who can cheer him up after a nightmare...and so on and so forth. Y/N comes and sits beside him on the couch, grinning. “What are you thinking about?” She asks.

“Oh nothing.” He lies. Of course, he knows he can’t tell her that he’s in love with her. Especially since he knows there’s no way she feels the same about him. Before Y/N can reply, there’s a knock at the door, and she springs up to answer it.

“Sean! Hey!” She grins, pecking him on the lips and leading him inside, her arm wrapped around his waist. “Bucky! You remember my boyfriend Sean, right?” She asks.

“Yes, I do. Hey Sean.” He gives him a small wave from his position on the couch, which Sean returns, before being led into the kitchen by Y/N. Once they’re out of sight, Bucky’s smile falls. Sean is the big reason why he can’t tell Y/N that he’s in love with her. He might not know much about love, given he’s over a hundred years old, but he does know that you can’t tell people things like that and destroy their happiness, even if he wishes it was him she was with. Everytime he’s around, or even when she talks about him, a big grin is present on her face. And it tears him apart inside. But despite how happy she is around him, and how he knows that her happiness is all that matters, Bucky can’t stand Sean at all.

It’s not even just because he’s dating the girl he’s been in love with from the moment he met her. Bucky just...gets bad vibes from him, and doesn’t trust him as far as he can throw him (which, considering his metal arm, is quite far actually). He can’t explain why he dislikes him so much, he just does. And because of that, he refuses to get to know Sean any more than he has to, despite Y/N’s wishes for them to both get along. He knows it breaks her heart, but he can’t help it. He got through the last eighty or so years of his life trusting only himself, and isn’t about to stop now. But, his distrust of Sean for no reason is still confusing to him, so he decides he has to get to the bottom of it.

So, as soon as he can, Bucky visits another friend of his and Y/N’s.

~*~*~*~*~

“No, I cannot send Red Wing after her boyfriend to spy on him. Are you insane?! I thought all that mindless killing and spy stuff was behind you?” Sam asks.

“Okay first of all, ouch, and secondly, it is. I just hate HIM. I don’t trust him one bit.”

“Well...is he hurting her? Do you think she’s in danger?” Mulling it over, Bucky shakes his head.

“No. I just....think he’s weird and gross. He just...I don’t know! I just don’t like him Sam, is that really a big issue?!”

“It is when you’re trying to send The Avengers after him! And besides, if she’s not being hurt, there’s nothing we can do.” Huffing, Bucky rolls his eyes. “Why don’t you just spend time with him?” Sam asks. “I mean, you don’t like him, but Y/N has clearly got her heart set on this man, so there’s got to be something you’re missing. Maybe that robot brain of yours needs re-working.”

“Well, he did ask if I wanted to hang out, maybe get some coffee together a few weeks ago. And it’d make Y/N happy if we hung out more...” He trails off, and Sam starts nodding.

“See! You’re right! And after all, as long as Y/N’s happy, that’s all that matters...right Bucky?” Bucky is silent for a while, and Sam almost makes another crack at how he can hear the gears turning in his robot brain, but Bucky soon speaks up.

“Okay, I’ll do it.” Sam starts grinning. “But I uh...I’ll need some moral support there. Some help...guy to guy, you know.” Sam’s grin immediately disappears.

“Ohhh no. No no no. I am not getting dragged into this. Whatever’s between you and this dude is your business. I want no part of this.”

“Come on Sam! Please?!” Bucky asks. “That way you can see that it’s not just all in my head. I’m not wrong, I promise. You can trust my judgement.”

“Ah yes, because your judgement has been so great before...” Sam mumbles, but Bucky doesn’t respond to that.

“And after all, I think it’s an important part of my therapy, you know, making new friends and all that. I’m sure both the doc and Y/N will be pleased to hear that.” Sam shakes his head.

“I don’t care, I’m still not getting dragged into this.”

~*~*~*~*~

“I hate you.” Sam whispers, glaring at Bucky from across the Starbucks table. Bucky ignores him, and stares out the window, looking for Sean. “I cannot believe you dragged me into this.” Sam continues to complain.

“Shut up Sam.” Bucky orders, continuing to stare out the window.

“Oh, you’re going to be like that? You know Bucky, it’s really rude-“ Bucky suddenly sits up straighter, seeing Sean walking through the door.

“Shut up Sam.”

“Hey! You don’t- ouch!” Sam gasps as Bucky’s foot makes a connection with his ankle in an attempt to shut him up. “Thank god his foot’s not made of vibranium...” Sam hisses.

“Sean! Over here!” Bucky calls, waving him over as Sam rubs his ankle, continuing to glare at Bucky. Sean heads over to the table and sits down, greeting Bucky with a smile and a hello. Then he notices Sam beside him.

“Oh my god, hi! You’re Sam, right? It’s really nice to meet you. I’m a big fan of Captain America.” He gasps, holding out his hand, which Sam shakes, clearly happy with the attention. Bucky suppresses a groan, knowing Sam will not shut up about this, and will think Sean is great, no matter what he says. “Gotta admit, I didn’t expect to have you join us, but I’m glad you’re here.”

“Yeah, well...I was in the neighbourhood, so.....Bucky invited me to join you both.” Sam lies, giving Bucky a hard stare.

“Well I’m glad you’re here. Both of you. You seem to know her really well, so I’m glad to hang out with you both.” Sean grins, ignoring or failing to notice the tension between Sam and Bucky. “She talks about you both a lot, actually.”

“Oh she does? You know, she talks about you a lot too. It’s nice to finally meet you man.” The pair turn their eyes to Bucky, who still hasn’t said anything, and continues fixing his gaze on Sean.

“Um, hi Bucky. It’s nice to see you again. How have you been?” Sean asks, suddenly looking like he’d rather be anywhere but here.

“Good.” Bucky responds, continuing his staring. Sean’s face flushes.

“Does he uh...does he always stare like this?” Sean whispers to Sam, clearly loud enough for Bucky to hear.

“Yup. All the time. I wouldn’t worry about it too much. He does it to me too. It means he likes you.” Sam lies. Sean starts smiling.

“Oh, it does? That’s good then! Right, I’ll get the drinks then. What are you guys having?” He asks, heading up to the counter after both pass on their orders. As soon as he’s out of earshot, Sam rounds on Bucky.

“What the hell is wrong with you? You’re going to frighten the poor guy to death.” Sam hisses.

“Well, he’s weird right? Something’s off with him. He just doesn't seem genuine.” Bucky fires back. Sam frowns.

“No! He’s been nothing but polite, and you’re staring at him like you’re in Winter Soldier kill mode. Wait, you’re not actually in that...mode are you? You’re not gonna hurt him, right Bucky?”

“Depends how the rest of this goes.” Bucky keeps a close eye on Sean as he waits for the drinks to be made. But so far, Sean seems to be doing nothing wrong or weird, and for a split second, Bucky wonders if he’s the one in the wrong, and that he’s just misguided. That is however, until Sean notices a pretty auburn haired woman is in front of him in line, and Bucky thinks he notices him look down towards her butt. Okay he’s definitely looking at her butt. His gaze lingers for a little while, and Bucky feels the rage building up in him. How could he disrespect Y/N like that? A girl just as beautiful, actually more beautiful than the one in front of him, and yet he disrespects her like this? “See?! He just started staring at her ass!” Bucky hisses, and Sam glances up from his phone, looking over.

“I don’t see anything.” He shrugs, going back to his phone. Bucky huffs.

“Are you serious? You barely looked! And that’s not an okay thing for him to do! I’m going to say something.”

“No. No you aren’t.” Sam orders. “You have no way to tell if that’s even what he did. And even if it was, you are not confronting him in a public Starbucks. Remember what happened last time everyone saw you fighting people?” He asks, and Bucky is immediately reminded of his face all over the news when people thought he killed King T’Chaka, and during the bar fight in Madripoor, when everyone was filming him, ready to post about how dangerous he was all over the internet. Even though he hates to admit it, Sam is right. Making this whole thing public was not a good choice. ...That doesn’t mean he can’t do it in private though. “Listen Bucky, I don’t get why you hate this guy so much, and sure, if he’s really rude or gross, I’d get it. But I’m telling you, I just don’t see it. And in the nicest way, I think you’re just grasping at straws here.” For a second, Bucky considers launching Sam’s phone across the room, and making him look at Sean so he could see what he does, but decides that’s probably not the best thing to do. Stay low and all that. “Now. We’re going to have a nice coffee with Sean, and you’re not going to antagonise him. Right Bucky?” Bucky shakes his head. There was no way in hell he’s going to agree with that. Sam sighs.

“Why are you being like this? Y/N is someone I care about a lot, and I know you care about her too, so why won’t you listen to me and trust me on this?!” Bucky asks, and Sam raises an eyebrow.

“Of course I care about her Buck, but I think you’re going too far with this, and I’m worried it’s going to hurt her in the long run. Trust me on this. This kind of thing never ends well.” Bucky scoffs, and is about to say that he’s not going too far at all, and if Sam just listened and watched, he’d understand where he was coming from. But before he can open his mouth, Sean comes back, carrying a tray with their drinks and some snacks.

“Hey, sorry about your wait. It took longer than expected. I know you guys didn’t ask for them, but I got some cakes too. Y/N told me that you guys love them, so I thought I’d get them too.” He laughs awkwardly, still clearly intimidated by Bucky.

“You did? Well thank you Sean. Isn’t that nice Bucky?” Sam asks, giving Bucky a look.

“Thanks.” Bucky hisses, glaring down at the cake pop on the tray. Sean starts smiling. He’s right, he does like them...just when Y/N buys them for him though. And even though Sam was right about not confronting him in public, that doesn’t mean Bucky has to eat the cake. “I’m not hungry though.” Sean’s face falls, and Sam sighs, rolling his eyes.

“Oh, well...you can eat it later, right?” Sean asks.

“Mhm.” Bucky gives a tiny nod, making Sean look even more scared. Noticing this look and trying desperately to avoid the impending catastrophe, Sam starts up a conversation with Sean, whilst Bucky drinks his coffee and pipes up every so often with a grunt or a nod.

After a while, mostly filled with conversations between Sam and Sean and complete silence from Bucky, Sam gets up to go to the toilet. As he leaves, Sam gives Bucky a look, clearly pleading with him not to launch Sean through the window while he’s away. Bucky rolls his eyes and gestures for Sam to just go, which he does..whilst keeping his eyes on them the entire way there.

“So...” Sean trails off, laughing awkwardly.

”Let me get one thing clear.” Bucky says, and Sean audibly gulps, clearly startled. Bucky leans forward, and Sean immediately looks like he’s about to shit himself in fear. “Y/N means a lot to me. And if you do ANYTHING to hurt her, you will have me to deal with. You understand?” He hisses. Sean nods, still looking startled. “Say it.”

“Y-Yes Bucky...” He stammers out.

“Good. And let me tell you. Don’t think you can just...stare at other girls without repercussions. It wont end well, trust me.”

“But I didn’t...” He begins, and Bucky gives him another glare. He can see the guilt written all over his face. “Anyway. As long as you remember that, that’s all that matters.” He leans back into his seat, and takes another sip of his coffee. The pair sit in silence until Sam returns.

“Hey guys, I didn’t miss much did I? You’re both okay, right?”

“Yup.” Bucky and Sean say at the same time. Sam looks surprised by this, but smiles, clearly happy that Sean hasn’t been launched through the Starbucks window, even though that’s still what Bucky wanted to do.

~*~*~*~*~

After the trio are finished in Starbucks, they stand outside to say their goodbyes. Well. Two of them do at least. “Well, bye guys, it was uh...nice to see you both.” Sean forces a smile, clearly trying to not anger Bucky even more.

“Yeah it was fun! Hopefully we can do this again.” Sam grins, clearly not noticing the awkwardness between them both, or ignoring it. Sean grimaces, and walks away from the pair. Sam waves him off.

“I don’t get why you like him so much.” Bucky sighs, starting to walk back towards his apartment, closely accompanied by Sam, who’s still grinning.

“At first I didn’t understand why you don’t like him, but I think I do now. I realised it when I was in the bathroom.”

“Well, that is where you do most of your thinking.” Bucky counters, rolling his eyes. He already told him why he didn’t like Sean. In his eyes, there wasn’t much else to think about. Sam ignores the dig, and continues:

“It’s because you have a crush on Y/N, isn’t it?” Bucky stops in his tracks, turning towards Sam.

“Uh no, I don’t. Who says I do?!” Bucky lies. Sam’s grin grows even wider.

“Oh yes you DO Bucky. I can’t believe I didn’t notice it before. It’s SO obvious!” Even though he tries desperately to stop it, Bucky feels his cheeks flush. Sam picks up on this immediately. “Ha! I knew it! You like her. I mean, I should’ve noticed sooner, with the way you look at her, and the way you speak about her.”

“Sam, can you shut up?” Bucky hisses. “Please.” Sam’s face softens. “Yes..I like her. I think she’s the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen, and I’m so glad to be her friend. But that is NOT why I hate Sean. I don’t care who Y/N is with, as long as she’s happy and they treat her well, and I'm worried he isn't going to.” Bucky feels his heart sink as he says that he doesn’t care who she’s with. Of course, he wants it to be him more than anything...but life doesn’t always work out like that. After all, it had treated him so shittily in the past, there’s no way it would also give him the girl of his dreams. Bucky had learned a long time ago that his dreams weren’t meant to come true. But despite that, if he was destined to just be Y/N’s friend, that was okay with him.

“I’m sorry Bucky.” Sam says, sounding genuine. He reaches over and gives Bucky a pat on the back. “For what it’s worth, despite me not seeing Sean the way you do, your support and love for Y/N is really admirable, and shows how good a guy you are. I hope you find love and happiness with someone, even if it’s not with Y/N.”

“Thanks Sam.” Bucky gives a soft smile. He knows he doesn’t deserve it, but it was still nice to hear. The pair resume walking towards Bucky’s apartment.

“I will say though, you gotta work on your anger issues.”

“I don’t have anger issues.”

“...Yeah you do. I saw the way you looked at him. Anyway, I know the best way to do that...video games at your place.”

“Why is it always my place?”

“It’s nice, and you have better games than I do. I have Y/N to thank for that.” Sam walks on ahead, and Bucky rolls his eyes. Even though Sam sometimes gets on his nerves, he’s still incredibly glad to have him as a friend. Even when he eats all the food in his fridge.

~*~*~*~*~

The duo soon arrive at Bucky’s apartment, and are midway through a game of Mario Kart when they’re interrupted by the sound of banging on Bucky’s door. Pausing the game, Sam and Bucky exchange a cautious look as they slowly move towards the door, not wanting to be surprised by something that could be The Avengers’ newest threat. That is however, until a voice sounds through the door:

“JAMES BUCHANAN BARNES, I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE!” Y/N calls. “I NEED TO TALK TO YOU.”

“Ooh, full name. You’re fucked.” Sam says, clearly trying not to laugh. Bucky glares at him, before steeling himself and opening the door. Y/N stands there, her arms folded and a glare on her face. “Oh she looks like you when she glares.” Sam whispers loud enough for just Bucky to hear.

“Um...hey Y/N.” Bucky gives her a small wave.

“Don’t ‘hey Y/N’ me asshole. I need to talk to you.” She orders, walking into the apartment. “Oh, hi Sam. Can I speak to Bucky please? Alone?” She asks, almost hissing the words.

“Don’t have to tell me twice.” Sam responds, holding his hands up in surrender and leaving the room, taking a bowl of M&Ms with him. As soon as the door clicks shut behind Sam, Y/N unleashes her anger on Bucky.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” She asks. For a second, Bucky almost responds with ‘many, many things’ but he realises that might be the wrong thing to say. Y/N does not look like she can handle jokes right now. “Sean told me about your coffee date. I know you’re not the best person with socialising but GOD Bucky, are you even trying to be civil to him?”

“Doll, listen...” Bucky begins, but she cuts him off.

“Nope. Nuh uh. You do not get to call me that right now. And I’m not even finished speaking.” Bucky takes the hint and shuts up. “Everytime he speaks, or even breathes, you look like you want to wring his neck!”

“No I don’t!”

“Yes you do! I’ve seen it! And not even that, you THREATENED HIM!”

“Hey, I’m just being protective of you!” Bucky defends, trying not to feel bad. This is their first fight...ever, and he hates it. Especially because he’s trying to protect Y/N, and she just won’t listen.

“That’s not being protective! That’s being weird and creepy!”

“Exactly what I said!” Sam calls from the other room.

“Thanks Sam.” Bucky and Y/N say in unison. They both look at each other, the argument the last thing on their minds. “...Jinx.” Bucky whispers, smiling. For a second, a smile creeps its way onto Y/N’s face, and Bucky feels hopeful that they can have a civil conversation. But then, Y/N clearly remembers where she is, and the smile falls.

“Bucky...please don’t do that. Please don’t.” She pleads. She looks sad to be fighting with him, and Bucky feels a pang in his chest. Both about their fight, and about what he needs to tell her.

“I’m sorry d-Y/N.” He quickly clarifies. He takes a seat on his couch, beckoning for her to join him, which she does. He takes her hands in his, gently running his thumb over her knuckles with his non metal hand. “It may seem like I’ve been too hard on Sean, but trust me, I do have my reasons.” Y/N frowns, and Bucky continues. “When we were out...I saw him staring at another girl. He definitely stared at her butt. And because I care about you, I wanted him to know that wasn’t acceptable, and if he hurts you, he’ll have to answer to me.” Y/N is silent for a few seconds, frowning as she takes it all in. Bucky waits patiently, waiting to support her when she needs it. Finally, she speaks.

“Oh my god...” She begins. But just as Bucky is about to comfort her, she finishes her sentence. “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.” She scoffs. Bucky starts frowning, and before he can speak, Y/N stands up, pulling her hands out of his grasp. “I can’t believe you Bucky. First you threaten my boyfriend, and now you stoop so low to make up lies about him! I know you don't like him, but even so, that's no excuse.”

“B-But I didn’t! I saw it!” Bucky stammers, quickly getting up.

“Oh you did, did you? Did you also see a unicorn? Did you see a flying pig? Come on Bucky, just tell me the truth. You didn’t see those things because they don’t exist. I know he wouldn’t do that to me.”

“...And you don’t trust me?” He asks.

“I thought I did, but I don’t know if I can anymore.” She replies. Bucky swears he feels his heart shatter in that moment. A mixture of anger and pain begin to build in his stomach, and he feels tears welling up in his eyes. “I know. Why don’t we ask Sam what he saw?” She asks, walking towards the room. Bucky gasps, trying to reach out and stop her.

“No...no you don’t have to.” Scoffing, she turns around.

“Why? Because he didn’t see it?” She asks. Instead of letting him answer, she opens the door to a startled Sam, still clutching the bowl. “Sam. Did you see what Bucky said he saw? Did Sean cheat on me with a girl in Starbucks?”

“Well, I personally didn’t see it, but-“

“And that’s all I need.” Y/N sighs. She turns back to Bucky, her eyes shimmering with tears. “Just...I don’t know what I can say to you.” She sniffles. “I thought you were my friend.”

“Doll, I am, I swear-“

“I SAID DON’T CALL ME THAT!” She snaps, tears spilling from her eyes. “I...I need to go. Sean’s waiting on me. Just. Leave us alone please. I can’t be friends with you if you can’t respect me and my relationship. If you want to apologise, you know where to find me.” She starts walking towards the front door.

“Wait.” Bucky gasps, and Y/N stops in her tracks. “Please believe me Y/N. I wouldn’t lie to you about this.” She stays silent. “Please Y/N.” Bucky repeats, moving closer towards her. When he sees he’s getting no response, he feels the anger rising. “I’m not apologising for being right!” He says louder than he expected to. Y/N sniffles again, and Bucky immediately regrets his tone.

“Well....I guess this is goodbye then.” Y/N says, and Bucky can hear her start to cry. ”Goodbye Bucky. Bye Sam.” Without another word, she opens the door of Bucky’s apartment and leaves, closing the door behind her.

Bucky stands there for what feels like an eternity, just staring at the door. Part of him knows he should run after her, but it feels like his feet are rooted to the ground. So instead, he stands there, waiting for the slim chance of her coming back. At this point, he doesn’t even care who’s right or wrong...he just wants to apologise to her and have her back in his life. As time goes on, he slowly starts to accept she’s not coming back. When he said he felt his heart shatter before, this feels like the tiny shards were stabbing him, and piercing every part of him. And despite everything Bucky has been through, the fights, the torture, the nightmares...this pain hurts more than anything he’s ever experienced in his life.

“Bucky...” He registers Sam’s voice from beside him, but can’t even say anything back to him. “Are you....are you alright?” Sam asks. Bucky can tell from his voice that he knows he’s asking a dumb question. How the hell could anyone be okay after an argument like that? But he knows that Sam’s a therapist, and that’s what they do. His own doc would do the same. But the question still made him realise that he is definitely not okay. A tear falls from his eyes and rolls down his cheek, and Bucky says the only thing he’s able to say.

“I’ve lost her forever Sam.”

~*~*~*~*~

In the weeks after his argument with Y/N, Bucky has become even more reclusive than he is usually. He barely leaves his apartment, only venturing outside to go to his appointments or to get food. Aside from seeing his doctor and occasionally replying to Sam’s texts, he has no other social interactions. Y/N was his everything: his best friend...actually, his only friend, and one of the only girls he’s ever loved. And now, she was gone. And it was like Bucky’s happiness and joy for life left with her. After all, she was usually the reason why he was happy. Well...the only reason.

But he doesn’t judge her for being upset at him. Bucky has started to blame himself for what happened. Maybe he had seen things that didn’t exist, or taken things the wrong way. All he wants to do is go over to Y/N’s apartment, apologise to her and get her back. He doesn’t even care about being with her, he just wants to be her friend again. Unfortunately, Bucky is far too scared to do it. The last time they saw each other was filled with so much pain and tears, he didn’t want to put them both through that again. That and he was terrified it wouldn’t work out, and that he’d never see her again. So instead, he did nothing. He felt horrible about it, but he knew it was the best option, and nobody else would get hurt.

However, one day, Bucky has decided he’s fed up with being stuck in his apartment, and chooses to go for a walk. Once he is outside, he walks towards the park. As he walks, he takes a deep breath, enjoying the fresh air and the sun on his skin. He just wishes Y/N was here with him. Memories flash through his mind of spending time with her, having picnics together, buying ice creams for each other, giving her piggy back rides, running for shelter in the rain, playing catch and almost hitting people in the face because he forgot about the true strength of his arm. The memories are full of laughter, and Bucky almost starts laughing as he remembers them. But then he remembers that they’re not friends anymore, and his smile fades. He continues walking, trying his best to ignore the guilt.

As he looks around, he looks up and sees a familiar face from across the park, stopping him in his tracks. Is that...Sean? It definitely looks like him. Bucky realises he’s finally been granted a second chance. All he has to do is go over there, apologise and then everything would be better again. But as he’s making his way over to him, Bucky realises he’s not alone. Sean is accompanied by a woman. A woman who definitely isn’t Y/N. Although the can feel anger rising within him, Bucky takes a deep breath. Maybe he got it wrong again, and this isn’t Sean, or the woman he’s with is a distant relative? Or a friend? ...And then Sean pulls her close, and kisses her on the lips. Okaaaay....maybe Sean somehow has an identical twin who just so happens to live in the same town as them, and who neither he nor Y/N have mentioned before? Bucky suddenly realises the pair are heading towards him, and he’ll have to hide, or risk being discovered.

Thankfully, even though Bucky is still trying to forget the time he spent as the Winter Soldier, he hasn’t forgotten the stealth that came with it. So, he manages to find a hiding spot. Unfortunately, the park isn’t the best and most stealthiest place to hide, especially not for a man with a metal arm. So, Bucky has to resort to turning away and using his jacket’s collar as a form of protection. Thankfully, neither notice him, and walk past him. As they do, he hears a part of their conversation:

“Sean! You’re so bad!” She laughs.

“Can you blame me? You’re just so gorgeous baby.” Bucky feels his fists clenching as the reality begins to sink in. He was right. Sean is cheating on Y/N. He’s cheating on his best friend and the girl he’s been in love with since they first met. Bucky almost runs after Sean and confronts him. But before he does, his mind pictures Y/N, sifting alone in her apartment, completely unaware of the truth. And he realises what he has to do. So he starts to run towards her apartment.

On the way there, all Bucky can think about is the heartbreak that will be on her face when he tells her the truth. It’s going to break both of their hearts, but he has to do it. Soon, he reaches her building, and heads up to her apartment. As he knocks, he hopes to every god that she’s not in, so he doesn’t have to break the bad news to her. But despite all his hopes, the door opens, and Y/N peeks out. A smile grows onto her face when she sees Bucky, which causes another pang at his heart. How can he do this to her?

“Bucky...hi.” She smiles. “I was wondering if you’d come round. I need to talk to you. I-“

“Y/N listen.” Bucky cuts her off. She looks at him, her eyes curious. Sighing, he continues. “I have to tell you something. I was just at the park, and I saw Sean with another girl.” Y/N scoffs, and almost cuts in, but Bucky continues. “Please, hear me out. I know you probably don’t believe me, but I did see it, I promise. And the way they spoke about each other....I’m so sorry.”

“Seriously Bucky? You’re doing this again?” She sighs. “I’m sorry, but I don’t believe you. I trust Sean. I know you don’t trust him, but I know him better than you do. He wouldn’t do this. You don’t need to lie about him.” Bucky feels himself deflate slightly at that. Why won’t she believe him? Okay, maybe the first time, it was unbelievable, but now?

“...That’s not it at all! I’m just trying to protect you!” Bucky says. Y/N looks at him, a sympathetic look in her eyes.

“Well, I appreciate it, but I really don’t need you to. Sean and I were talking and-“ Bucky groans. That’s just what he needed. “And maybe...I don’t know, you’re jealous? Or you’re upset that I’m not spending as much time with you? If you are that’s okay, I’d understand. You don’t have to make up these lies. Both Sean and I are willing to sit and chat with you about this if you want, or I can come with you to your next therapy appointment if that’s easier.”

“No.” Bucky shakes his head. “I’m not lying. Please...why won’t you believe me?”

“Because I love him, and he loves me. When I'm with him, I'm happy, and so is he. Why would he do anything to jeopardise that?” Bucky feels his heart break again. Especially because he knows Sean doesn’t love her as much as he says he does. “Look, why don’t you come in for some tea, or a beer?” She offers, standing aside for him. Close to tears again, Bucky shakes his head.

“I’m sorry Y/N. But I can’t. If you don’t want to hear the truth because you’re so in love, I..I guess I understand. But I can’t stay here and watch you both together, knowing the kind of person he is.” He reaches out and gently takes her hands in his. “If you need me, you know where to find me. If not...well, I guess this is goodbye.” He whispers. He can see her face fall, and he turns and walks away. Bucky manages to maintain a straight face until he reaches the elevator, and then...he lets the tears fall.

 ~*~*~*~*~ 

In the days after Bucky said goodbye to Y/N, he feels even worse than he did the first time. This time feels more final. Now he doesn’t venture out of his apartment at all. Sam has been trying his best to talk to him, and get him outside, but Bucky has been ignoring him. He knows he shouldn’t be ignoring his friend, especially after losing one already...but by this point, Bucky has decided that he might as well lose all his friends at this point. He just doesn’t care anymore.

One day, almost two weeks since Bucky said goodbye to Y/N, he gets up around the middle of the afternoon, ready to spend this day like any other. But he’s soon stopped by a knock on his door. “Go away Sam!” He calls. But the knocking continues. “I’m not answering the door!” But still, the knocking doesn't stop. Bucky huffs, and stomps towards the door, flinging it open. “Sam! I told you to leave me alo-....Oh.” There, stands Y/N, tears streaming down her face. Seeing her there, Bucky is silent for a while. Part of him is convinced he’s still dreaming, and almost pinches himself to check he isn’t. But before he can do that, Y/N speaks, her voice shaky. 

“I owe you an apology.” Bucky stands aside, letting her in, which she gladly accepts. She sits on his couch, bringing her knees up to her face as Bucky closes the door. 

 “Do you uh..do you want something to drink? Or eat?” He offers. Y/N shakes her head, and Bucky sits down beside her. “What happened?” He asks, although he already has a feeling what it is. 

 “Well...you were right. He cheated on me. I uh...I came home from work early, and went over to his place to surprise him. I let myself in and...he was fucking some girl on the couch. Guess I got the surprise.” She sniffles again, before bursting into tears.

“Oh doll...” Bucky soothes. “Come here.” He opens his non metal arm, and she scoots over to him. He wraps his arm around her, pulling her into his chest, and holds her as she cries. Anger grows within him as she cries her eyes out. He’s going to kill him. 

 “I’m...I’m sorry Bucky. I just feel...so stupid! How could I have not believed you! You were just trying to tell me the truth...and I didn’t listen! I said you were a liar!” She wails, and Bucky rubs her back. 

 “No, no. It’s okay. You don’t have to apologise.”

“B-B-But I was so horrible to you, a-and condescending. I’m the worst friend ever!” She sniffles. Bucky knows his shirt is definitely drenched with tears by now, but he doesn’t care. All he cares about is making sure Y/N is happy. 

 “Y/N. It’s okay. Honestly. You were in love, and that’s totally understandable. I wouldn’t have believed me either.” She looks as if she doesn’t fully believe what he’s saying, but doesn’t say anything regardless. Instead, they both sit together, and Bucky gently rubs her back and down her arms, letting her cry out all her tears. “Tell you what. How about you stay over here tonight? I think there’s still some of your things here from when you last stayed over. I have a shirt I can give you if there isn’t. We can order some takeout, whatever you want, and we can play some video games...watch a movie, even one of those Disney ones you like so much.” Y/N smiles at that, and Bucky smiles with her. "There’s that smile I love so much. And tomorrow, I’ll go with you to his place, and we can grab your stuff. I can also kick his ass, or just stand around looking intimidating, whatever works.” Y/N lets out a loud laugh at that, making Bucky’s smile grow even wider. Hearing her laugh again is great. 

 “You are great at that, I have to admit.” She nods. Bucky winks. “Thanks Bucky. You’re the best. I don’t know what I did to deserve you in my life.” Bucky’s heart soars at that. It’s been a long time since someone told him that. 

 “You know doll, I ask myself the same question about you too.” He responds, making her smile. Before either can say anything though, there’s another knock at he door. Both look at each other, confused. “Sam? Is that you?” Bucky calls. They get their answer a few seconds later.  

“Y/N? Are you in there? Let me in please!” Sean’s voice calls. 

“Oh god, what is he doing here?” Y/N groans. Getting progressively angrier and protective, Bucky gets up off the couch, heading towards the door. Y/N gets up too, and Bucky gently moves her behind him for protection. Bucky opens the door, and Sean looks up, spotting Y/N behind Bucky. 

“Oh of course. She ran to the cyborg.” He scoffs. Bucky can smell some alcohol on his breath. His body tenses. 

“Sean, what the fuck?! Don’t speak to him like that! Especially not when you’re the one who I just caught cheating on me.” Y/N orders, but she’s ignored. Sean looks at Bucky’s angry face, and laughs. 

“I should’ve known. I can’t believe you’re getting mad at me for cheating once. Look at the two of you! Maybe I should’ve kept my eyes on you both. Who’s to say you didn’t cheat on me with him, huh?” Bucky’s fists clench, and Sean picks up on this immediately. “Oh, look. What are you going to do to me, Winter Soldier? Are you going to kill me?” Bucky thinks it over for a moment, then laughs. Sean looks confused. 

“I was thinking about it, but actually no, I won’t. I think I’ll let her handle it.” He smirks, standing aside to let Y/N step forward. She does...and immediately kicks Sean right in his balls, causing him to double over and groan in pain. 

“You’re a fucking asshole. Bucky was right about you, and I should’ve listened to him instead of your dumb ass. Because of you, I almost lost one of the best things I've ever had in my life. And you only cheated on me once? Really? Somehow, I doubt that.” She hisses. “Tomorrow, I’m going to come and pick up my stuff, and you can come and get yours from mine. Whether it’ll all be intact or in the garbage, I don’t know. After that, you’re going to stay away from Bucky and I. Do you understand?” When he doesn’t reply fast enough, she kicks him in the leg, causing another groan. “Do you understand?!” She repeats, her voice angrier. 

 “Yes! Yes! I got it!” He says quickly. Y/N stands up straight again. 

“Good. Now go back to whoever you were fucking on the couch, and leave us the fuck alone.” She orders, walking back into the apartment and slamming the door. 

“Hey! That was great!” Bucky grins. “You sure showed him better than I ever could.” 

“You really think so?” She asks, still slightly hyped on adrenaline. Bucky holds his arms out, pulling her into a tight hug. 

“Yes! Of course I do!” He encourages, squeezing her even tighter. They stay like that for a while, until the pair suddenly realise just how close they are to each other. They awkwardly spring apart, and both blush. Even though Bucky likes being so close to her, and wishes it could be like that all the time...he also knows how weird it is to do that to his best friend, especially when she just found her boyfriend cheating on her. “Um...wanna order a pizza?” He asks, and Y/N nods.

~*~*~*~*~ 

Later that night, Bucky and Y/N lay side by side on Bucky’s couch, a large cheese pizza between their legs, and an half finished bottle of rosé on the floor beside the couch...mostly for Y/N. The opening song to Beauty and the Beast plays on the television in front of them. “Here’s where she meets Prince Charming, but she won’t discover that it’s him til chapter three....” Y/N sings to herself, and she looks over at Bucky as she does. A small smile plays on her lips, and she starts to giggle. Bucky raises an eyebrow, asking if everything is okay. “It’s uh...it’s dumb. Well, not dumb. I was being dumb.” Y/N speaks quickly, before giggling even more. Bucky looks confused, and she continues. “I probably shouldn’t say this until I’m sober, but I’ve had a rough day and I have to let this out. It’s been eating me up inside for the past few days, and this afternoon.” 

Bucky pauses the movie, and turns to her. “Well that line kind of fits us! I mean....uh. I wasn’t being entirely honest with you at first. When Sean came over, and he said he should have kept his eyes on us, uh...” She takes a breath in an attempt to compose herself. “A few days ago, we had an argument about you...well, me and you.” She clarifies. “He was convinced that I liked you more than I liked him, and when I was on my way over here, I had a think about it, and....I think he’s maybe right.” Bucky almost feels his heart stop at that moment. She...likes him? Does she mean..in that way? Y/N continues. “I asked myself why I kept listening to him instead of you, and I realised...I wasn’t ever in love with him that much. But you...god Bucky, I’ve been in love with you since I met you. I just didn’t think you liked me in that way, so when a guy showed up who said he liked me, I kind of jumped at that and didn’t want to lose it, even when it’s obvious he didn’t love me. I was just so desperate to be loved, I blocked everything else out. And look where it got me.” She scoffs, finishes her glass of wine, and places it down. “I’m sorry Bucky. For everything.” 

“You don’t have to apologise. I told you.” Bucky replies, still in shock she might like him back. 

“I know, I know, but I do. And for what it’s worth, it’s okay if you don’t like me in that way. I just had to let it out. I’d understand if you don’t.” Without even responding, Bucky leans forward, and gently presses a kiss to her lips. 

 “Well...I do. I have for a long time.” He whispers. Y/N’s eyes go wide, and her cheeks flush.

“Oh...” She trails off. “Well, would you uh...would you like to go out with me sometime? On a date?” She asks. Bucky chuckles softly. 

“I would love to. But first, can I ask you to do something for me?” Y/N nods. “Can you kiss me again?” He asks. Smiling, both lean forward, pressing a kiss to each other’s lips. Even though both have no idea where their relationship will go from here, they’re ready to face it together.

And this time, Bucky doesn’t hate her new boyfriend. At least...not too much.