#but that’s a WHOLE lot for almost midnight
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frnkiebby · 9 months ago
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https://x.com/fixfaxfvck/status/1793081037553274986?s=46
oh anon i feel like you might be opening yourself up to a lot here with this one~🎃
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bengallemon · 6 months ago
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! SMTVV SPOILERS ! (that and partial nudity)
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- Horned God -
Bored and wanted to draw more of the bino being weird strange and divine. We're now almost done with our first CoV run so we actually know lore now! Please zoom in to look at details especially the horns, eye and ribs. We spent a lot of time on that.
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retrogradedreaming · 5 months ago
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I need to start thinking of ideas for the prompt list I made to get myself to sketch more in October, but instead I'm drawing self-indulgent comics about cats 😭
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cosmogyros · 2 months ago
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#i think getting nearly firecracker-bombed the other evening affected me more than i realized at the time#because this has been by far the worst new year's ever for me#in the past i was never more than mildly annoyed by it and even enjoyed the midnight fireworks climax#but i think i might have actually gotten a bit traumatized by that experience two days ago#and hadn't acknowledged it to myself / processed it. as today/tonight has demonstrated#it's past 3 a.m. now and i'm still crying too hard to sleep#and my whole body has been shaky for the past... 10 hours. or so.#even though the fireworks at midnight weren't really that bad at all#not even close to being as terrifying as the three explosions earlier this evening#which in their turn were easily outdone by the street explosion on saturday night that deafened me#i think i may be having a legit delayed trauma response to that now#re-triggered every time a firework goes off near me#i've never been someone who feels much fear#i feel stress and anger and discomfort and i worry and overthink sometimes#i've done a lot of things in my life while thinking 'well. this might be about to kill me. but we all die someday'#and never till this weekend did i feel terror on this level#(a technically unjustified terror too. bc inside my flat i'm almost 100% safe. so that again suggests a trauma response)#i don't think i've ever cried from sheer fear for my safety before#and every post i see saying 'happy new year' makes me feel sick bc it reminds me of this horrible weekend#it's wild how my lifelong feelings about fireworks could change so completely in the course of just three days#for the first time in my life i feel the need for one of those drugs that blunts your emotions and helps relax you#what is that... xanax or something like that? how do you get it? do you need a prescription?#i feel like a doctor would just scoff if i told them that NYE fireworks traumatized me so bad i need medication now#i've been trembling for hours. i'm so tired. i wish i could sleep#*three days ago
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coffee-and-geto · 5 days ago
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JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY - SATORU GOJO
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“Bet you can’t even handle it,” he dares to murmur so close to your mouth. “I can play the game,” you accept, wrapping your hand around his wrist to free your frowned-face, eyes gleaming with a burning desire to smash his cocky face.
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pairing: satoru gojo x f!reader
summary: he wasn’t supposed to be here. not a the soirée organized by your friends at their home. he was busy — as always, and wasn’t it the right reason you broke up with him months ago? so what the hell is he doing here after months of break up?
warnings: +18 MDNI, nsfw, smut, exes to lovers, suguru, shoko and nanami make an appearance, sex pollen, aphrodisiac chocolates, sex (p in v), fingering (f! receiving), nipple playing, deepthroat, rough sex, swearing, oral (m! + f! receiving), a lot of tension and teasing, doggy-style, fanart by @/knr_Illust on X.
wc: 4,335
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“You will lose.”
“I don’t think so, sweetie,” he whispers back, blowing words on your lips as a tempting move to make you lose.
What you were doing was so wrong.
But how not to take the bet up?
All of this wasn’t supposed to happen.
Just an enjoyable soirée at your friends’ place. Drink a few glasses, chat and laugh until midnight, and sleep before returning to work.
But absolutely not straddling your ex on your friend’s couch in the dimly lit room while everyone is sleeping.
You weren’t expecting Satoru to come. Nanami and Suguru were here as expected, but Shoko didn’t mention your ex. So what a surprise when, in the middle of chatting with your friends and snacking on some appetizers, you hear someone knock at the door.
“Sorry, a lot of traffic, you know.”
You freeze in the middle of your conversation with Nanami, wring your neck at the doorstep, and widen your eyes until they almost pop out of their orbits.
What—
“Good evening, everyone,” the bastard grins, a cocky smile letting the start of his perfectly aligned teeth flash to everyone except you.
His ocean-blue eyes drop immediately on you — under his eternal blindfold — and unlike your staggered face, he smirks at you.
“Well, I see that you all started without me?”
So the whole evening consisted of ignoring him, opting for the strategy of avoidance so as not to have to look at your ex or hear him cackling with laughter with Shoko or Suguru from time to time — poor Nanami remaining the most polite with you by doing all the talking with you even when it was your turn to respond.
And that your eyes took the liberty of sneaking glances at Satoru and his cursed blindfold.
During dinner, you forced yourself to join in the general laughter, answering and going one further on a few points without ever addressing a single word to your ex.
Need the saltshaker near Satoru, you were going to disturb Suguru who was further away.
Water?
Shoko.
To clear away the dishes?
Nanami.
The whole evening’s been spent laughing at a ghost whose presence you’re blissfully unaware of.
Without once stopping to wonder who invited him.
Who dared spoil your evening to invite this little prick?
After much discussion, laughter and reminiscing about the nostalgic old days, as the hour grew late, Suguru suggested we all go to bed, indicating the guest rooms for each of us and the freedom to use the couch as everyone saw fit.
But from tossing and turning in your mattress with sheets freshly washed for you by your friend, the silence of the apartment is far too deafening for your brain.
Satoru.
Your ex.
Here.
In the next room, probably sleeping soundly while you ruminate on his presence in your bed, ruining not only your evening with friends by his presence, but also your sleep by daring to tell Suguru that he’s agreed to stay the night.
You should have refused your friend’s offer and gone home, you ponder, pouting as your turn on your side for the umpteenth time, staring at the wall in front of you in the indistinctness of the room plunged into darkness.
You grab your cushion and toss it across the room, letting it crash pathetically against the wall and then fall to the floor with a soft poof.
You sit up on your feet, taking a deep breath. If sleep doesn't come, you might as well induce it until you're exhausted.
Opening your bedroom door with the utmost slowness, discretion and care, you first poke your head out to scan the corridor and make sure no one's there. All doors are closed and no sound is emitted from anywhere.
At a leisurely pace, you slip into the kitchen, closing the door without pushing it all the way open, then allowing yourself to huff and puff and turn on the light.
Perhaps a midnight snack?
Suguru’s always in the habit of having some in his cupboards.
So you don’t feel ashamed to rummage through his closets, pushing through the many unopened bottles of soda and alcohol, to see if he hasn’t got a packet of sweets or whatever already open, just waiting to be opened and gobbled up by your stomach still rumbling from the meagre dinner you gave him — appetite suppressed by the arrival of your ex, of course.
At the very back of one of the cupboards overflowing with snacks as sweet as they are salty, and even bitter, you stand on tiptoe and reach for the intriguing black box with its gold metal embellishments.
Once in your hands, you turn it over between your fingers, noting that it’s brand new.
...Will Suguru mind?
You shrug, opening the box from its black packaging to discover squares of chocolates as simple as cheap ones.
“Hmph...”
You frown your lips, slightly disappointed by the content of the beautiful packaging that made you dream about a better late-snack than poor squares of chocolate.
However, the box gives off a curious, intoxicating scent, now that you put your nose closer to it. Indeed, it's almost as if it's not calling out to you to—
“Chocolates? And you're not even thinking of offering me some?”
A low, warm voice, like drizzled molasses muttered right in your ear, makes you jump high enough to send the chocolate box flying further away.
You refrain yourself from screaming and rather drop at your feet, cringing yourself to contain your hammering heart against your ribs and threaten them to break.
“Fuck you,” you spit out harshly.
“I take the offer, sweetie,” Satoru responds with a grin in his voice — the bastard proud of what he had done.
After a few calming breaths, you straighten up, ignoring the wild strands of hair hanging in front of your nose.
“What the fuck are you doing here?”
He shrugs, playing with the box of chocolates he caught in the air during your jumpscare. “Heard noises in the kitchen and saw your door half-open.” He pauses, treading a finger under his blindfold to tug it down and freeing his cerulean eyes to lower on your form. “Missed me?”
You scoff. “Not even in your dreams.”
“What a shame.”
He turns the box upside down without taking his eyes off you.
“You wan’ it back?” He smirks.
You squint. “I won’t earn it.”
He smiles drops. “You’re not funny, jeez.”
And instead of giving up and returning to his bedroom, he steps forward, shortening the distance between you two before taking a square of chocolate under your nose.
“Smell it? It’s an aphrodisiac,” he mouths, his breath grazing your flushed cheek.
You take a step back? “A-And? Can’t I eat whatever I want? Or will you impose yourself again?”
“Aw, you didn’t know it was an aphrodisiac?” he coos, this time trapping you against the wall behind you with the chocolate between his fingers as he puts away the box. He rips open the plastic wrapping, snapping it in half. “As much as you didn't know I was coming?” His index finger lifts your chin to look straight into your defiant, wary eyes.
The aroma of the aphrodisiac chocolate swirls between the two of you, enveloping you as closely as it can so that you give in to the tension. Every breath is a soft arousing stroke on each other's skin, like the devil whispering sins in your ear.
“Bet you can’t even handle it,” he dares to murmur so close to your mouth.
“I can play the game,” you accept, wrapping your hand around his wrist to free your frowned-face, eyes gleaming with a burning desire to smash his cocky face.
“That’s my girl.”
The words hit you like an electric current, sliding from your chest to your stomach to end up in your core, which is just warming up despite the little pyjama shorts you're wearing. No, you won't let it happen.
So, with slow, deliberate, provocative movements, Satoru breaks the chocolate square in half and takes the first half to your mouth. Without flinching, you part your lips and sink your teeth into the square before folding your lips around the rest of it — a piece of Satoru’s thumb in the process, causing him to swallow so hard that his Adam's apple wobbles.
The chocolate in your mouth melts almost immediately: a velvety sweetness of bittersweet cocoa with a hint of sugar invades your palate, almost making you roll your eyes — but you hold back with all your might. As it flows down your gullet, the heat rises in the opposite direction. For now, the taste is good and you’re warm.
In turn, your heart beating slightly faster, you take the other half of the chocolate square and hold it out to Satoru’s half-open mouth.
He bites into the chocolate unhurriedly, leaving enough time for his lips to wrap around it — enough to suck on the tip of your index finger in the process. When the whole morsel disappears into his mouth, he swallows as quickly as you do.
Finally, he pulls his face away from yours, impassive, and holds out his hand.
“Let’s get comfortable, shall we?”
~~~~
If you’d known that listening to Satoru’s offer to get comfortable on the sofa in the semi-darkness of the living room would lead you to straddle him in spite of your principles, you’d have held back.
After a few words of polite exchange, occasionally spikes and provocations, your body heat having increased in the process, the tension allowed you to find yourself sitting on Satoru’s lap — more specifically on his crotch, where his growing bulge is crashed under your throbbing core.
Is this how an aphrodisiac is supposed to work?
Your breaths are heavy, measured, begging to be let go.
Satoru sits just as comfortably as you on his knees — back pressed against the sofa, legs spread a little to make room for you and let his bulge rub against you.
You’re slightly above him — much to your delight.
Under your pyjama top, you’re not wearing any underwear, and Satoru is determined to make you notice.
“Not wearing underwear? I can feel how wet you are, how your nipples are red and perking — you’re going to lose, sweetheart,” he breathes in your neck, hands digging into your waist and hips until bruising and rubbing the tip of his nose on your torso as much as he can. He takes his time to inhale your intoxicating and arousing scent — or was it the aphrodisiac? He exhales heavily, closing his eyes when the bridge of his nose gently pushes under the swell of your breast through the fabric of your tank top.
He can feel how the movement made you tighten your arms around his shoulders, nails scratching his perfect, snowy undercut. How every heartbeat inside of your chest pounds against his face.
He is going insane, at his rate.
“I won’t lose, Toru,” you sigh, closing your eyes a sec too. “I’m just enjoying myself.”
And God, he could cum in his pants right now only with you uttering his name. “You do? Because I can make it better, you know?” He looks up at you, fluttering his eyes open to meet yours, his face pressed between your breasts. “Remember how I used to eat you out, hmm?” He cocks his head. “Used to play with those beautiful tits? Shut you up with my dick?” And then he allows his big hands to run along your sides, sliding from your hips to your waist to your breasts and then slowly back down again.
You clench your teeth, ignoring how hard your walls are clenching around nothing and only pulsing against Satoru’s bulge to make your break — and it doesn’t get any better when he himself twitches against you, hardening even more.
“Like when I used to suck you off?” you whisper back, lowering your mouth to let him feel your burning breath. “Ride you like no tomorrow? Of course I remember, Toru. How you used to fill me up so full of your cum until it was spurting out of me,” you purr in his ear, rubbing his cheek against yours and as hot.
And he believes he will burst now, having you trapping him in this arousing cage of your body.
He’s about to give up, because how good will it feel to fuck you? To claim you and shut down that attitude of yours?
“Foreplay isn’t in the bet, is it?” he mouths, parting his lips to wrap them so lightly around your perking, sensitive nipple through the fabric that you’re almost whimpering in his ear. “Is it?”
Foreplay didn’t kill anyone, did it?
“N-No, I think it’s safe—” And Satoru doesn’t even pay any attention about what you can say more, because he’s already tugging hard, sucking at your nipple with fabric like a mad man.
“Fuck, you’re so sensitive,” he groans, his hands roaming on your body to find the hem of your tank top. When he finds it, he lifts it above your chest, letting him freely play with you. 
His warm, soft and big hands mold your breasts, squeezing and tugging them roughly before wrapping each of them in his hands, only letting your nipples free so he can lick them, gently nibbling the sensitive buds times to times until you’re gasping for air, mumbling his name because moaning it would wake up your friends.
“S-Satoru—”
“I know, sweetheart, I know,” he mutters, squeezing your mounds before sucking your buds one last time, not caring if there’s a thread of saliva connecting his lips with your chest.
Down here, it’s even worse. Your shorts, damp with your wetness of arousal were the only thing separating his cock of his fingers from making you cum. And how much you need to…
Shaking slightly from the adrenaline, you kneel between Satoru’s legs and undo his belt, the clicking sound threatening to wake your friends. So Satoru lends you a hand and removes his clothes more quietly, letting his aching cock spring free.
The girth is gorgeous and has not changed since last time, you think, hypnotized by all the veins coursing up his lengths until the reddish tip leaking with pre. It was only waiting for you to take care of.
And without losing any time, you chastely kiss his tip, Satoru wincing and hissing in pleasure as you wrap your pretty red lips around the sensitive tip. You spit a bit of saliva, wetting him enough to suck him until his aching balls will spill every drop of their seed.
Satoru threads his fingers into your hair, fiery cheeks coloring his pale skin. He is dumbfounded on how fast you need him as bad as he does.
You part your lips wider, eager to take more of his lengthy cock until the tip kisses the back of your throat. You stroke what you can’t take and bob slowly your head back and forth. You hum with a small smile; his taste hasn’t changed since last time. Satoru is salty — not oversalted, nor tasteless. Just the perfect taste to make you want to swallow all his semen.
“Shit, sweetheart,” he moans lowly, fluttering his eyes closed as you sucked more of his dick. “I won’t last like this…”
And you nod with his girth still deep down your throat, hollowing your cheek to make him cum faster. You slowly pull him out of your mouth and toy with his balls, enjoying how they react to your touch.
“Cum for me, pretty boy?” you chirp, a bright smile flowering at your lips when you stroke his length from the base to the tip. And he nods wordlessly, tightening his grip around your hair that he’s wrapping around his fist.
You put the tip back around your lips, spitting more saliva on his already soaked cock — as soaked as your pussy, feeling a drop trickling down between your thighs. You repeat the motion, taking him deeper, sucking harder as you run your tongue along the underside of his cock, feeling him twitch in your mouth.
And when he’s about to cum — him throbbing in your hands — you take him back deep in your throat, hollowing your cheeks once more as he explodes, filling up your mouth. Satoru bites down his lower lip, suppressing a loud groan that could wake up everyone.
You swallow slowly, sticking out your tongue to show him that you have drunk everything he has given you.
“That’s my girl,” he sighs, releasing your hair as you get up from your knees.
You take off your shirt and shorts, tossing them on the floor with a rustling sound. All naked and pretty for him, Satoru waits for you to come closer so he can lift you in his arms and lay you down on the couch, settling between your legs when you spread your legs for him.
“Good girl,” he mumbles, bringing two fingers in his mouth that he covers with his own saliva before parting your drench folds. “So pretty for me and all wet.” He looks up at your flushed and embarrassed face. “Does sucking me off still arouse you, sweetheart?” And he can only chuckle when you wrap your thighs around his neck to suffocate him, but it makes him do worse.
He brings his face closer and presses a firm hiss on your puffy, hardened clit. He hums, closing his eyes again and darts out his tongue to lick a long strip between your folds and feel your fleshy core.
“Taste sweeter than ever,” he comments, sinking his two fingers into you as you cover your mouth with your palm to muffle your sweet sounds. “C’mon,” Satoru teases. “Let them hear how good your ex is gonna fuck you.” A low chuckle shakes his chest when your eyes widen.
“And the b-bet?” you gasp with his fingers finger-fucking you open and deliciously.
“To hell with the bet.” He rolls his eyes, wrapping your clit with his pink lips to suck it teasingly and make you squirm under him. “Focus on how good it feels, now,” he mutters, his breath hot against your own warm flesh. “I know you miss me as much as I do.”
His digits hit your sweet spot as fast as he finishes his sentence and you can only clench around him, walls throbbing as they never do in months; even with your fingers when you were in your bed for your alone time. Each stroke swollen your walls, making you close to cum around his fingers.
Knuckles deep, you dig your nails into Satoru’s forearm, babbling how close you are and how good it feels. “F-Feels good,” you pant, biting your fist to contain your moans, “missed that…”
“Did you, pretty girl? Now cum on my fingers, would ya?” he chuckles, thrusting faster his digits into you in a pace that will make you scream — noticing how he missed you in this state — messy hair, swollen lips and rosy cheeks striated with dried up thread of tears.
The moment after, you are cumming hard on his fingers, walls clenching hard and sucking at everything they can grip.
With kitten-licks, Satoru kisses one last time your clit before caressing your trembling inner thigh, drawing soothing circles as you come down from your high.
“That’s it baby,” he purrs. You cover your face with both hands and inhale and exhale slowly. “Breath for me, okay?”
Once he is assured he can safely pull out his fingers, he chuckles for himself and tastes your juices on his tongue. And fuck, your sweetness was enough to make him hard again.
Pulling off both his shirt and blindfold around his neck, Satoru settles this time with his cock aligned between your legs, tapping gently the tip of his thick length against your cute still-twitching clit.
“Want me how?” he asks as if he was preparing a herbal tea and needed to know if you prefer it with or without sugar.
You take a long breath in and sit up. “Fast and rough. Doggy.”
He raises a playful eyebrow. “Eh? Ma’am doesn’t want it gentle anymore?” he chuckles. “I think I can do that.”
He towers you, hands gripping both sides of your hips before flipping you over like you were a pillow. 
You have forgotten how strong he is…
With a real pillow this time, you take one between your arms that you hug and bury your face in, in case you would be too loud.
Back on your hips, Satoru’s hands dig into your skin enough to leave bruises and marks as he is always used to do on you.
Claiming you.
One of his hands snakes up on your soft, supple skin before stopping right on one of your ass-cheeks. He can’t resist smacking it — too loud that you’re gasping.
“They’ll hear us!” you whisper like a scold.
He shrugs, rubbing the sore skin before parting your cheeks to reveal your swollen lips — clenching around nothing and only waiting for him to fill up and leave no room in your sweet, tight pussy.
“Let ‘em hear. They know you’re mine, right?” He presses himself against your entrance, and does it with his broad chest against your back. “You’re mine, right?” he blows in your ear, sending a strong shiver running down your spine.
You nod obediently, pushing back your hips so his tip is pressed against your entrance and screams to be sucked by your cunt.
“Eager, are we?” he laughs softly, pushing his hips too and letting his mushroom tip drag a hiss out of him. “F-Fuck, you’re still tight, sweetheart. We’re gonna make a mess.”
“Just fuck me already,” you pout, slightly annoyed by his too much talk habits.
“I’m going to, princess, don’t worry,” he grins in your ear again, nibbling your earlobe. “Be patient, I want to take my time with you. We missed each other, didn't we?” He thrusts his hips deeper, but not fully, savoring your muffled whimpers as you nod. “Then take this cock, okay? Like a good girl.”
The praise sends a string of arousal straight down your core, tightening your walls around Satoru’s cock while he’s pushing deeper and deeper until he splits your open, and you pant his name like a mantra.
“Too big, Toru, s’big,” you cry, biting the pillow when his tip kisses your cervix.
“Too big, you’re sayin’? Oh, it’s been a while you haven’t been fucked by my big cock, that’s why,” he coos softly in your ear, kissing your burning cheeks. He can hear the squelching sounds of your wet pussy sucking his dick even though it was too much for you, yet.
“But I’m gonna making it fit again, and mold it so it can only take my dick,” he snorts as you babble words he can understand and not at the same time, before you sob and he grabs both your wrists and straightens up to thrust his hips into you with a hard, raw, steady rhythm. 
With one hand, he cuffs your wrists behind your back to pin you down enough so that you can only scream into the cushion as his cock pounds into you.
“Ah, Toru, please,” you cry out, face buried in the pillow as he continues to rut his hips hard and fast into you, each stroke punctuating with the sounds of his clapping full-balls against your sensitive clit.
“Please?” he chuckles, “c’mon, tell me how close you already are.” His free hand grabs your hips and slides up to your ass-cheeks and smacks it loudly. You whine in response, tightening around his thick dick. “That’s it, cum baby.” He smacks the other cheek and thrusts his hips at a frenetic pace.
This time his cock throbs into you, ready to cum with you.
“Cu-Cummin’, Toru,” you whine, clenching hard again around him with the same earlier sensation of a pit in your stomach exploding in you with a delicious release.
“Cummin’ too,” he urges, thrusting harder and faster until he moans loudly with no shame of waking up his friends who are still sleeping. He bursts in your pussy and spurt all the cum that were held in his balls — filling you up like he always used to do.
He breathes out heavily, wiping with the back of his hands the beads of sweat pearling around his face.
“Phew.” He lowers his ocean-blue eyes to your trembling form and doesn’t pull back immediately, leaving you to recover a little after this intense session.
At least the aphrodisiac is working.
“Is everything okay?” he whispers from behind, his long arms wrapping around your torso in a spoon hug. He rests his burning cheek on your clammy back to sooth your trembling.
“M’ good,” you mutter back, inhaling deeply before pulling away your face from the pillow and turning your head to the side, eyes fluttering closed. “Jus’ tired now…”
“You sure you don’t want to finish at my place?” he offers softly, his hands drawing slow patterns on your back. “I have some aphrodisiacs too, you know.”
“You still have Cinnamoroll on your bed?” you ask, opening your eyes suddenly.
His chest shakes through his laugh. “Never touched it. It’s still yours, pretty girl.” His lips stretch in a rascally smile at your interest only for the plushie. “You’ve missed it and not me? So my jealousy was meant for nothing?” He draws a small heart on your shoulder.
“Jealousy?”
“You’ve talked almost all night with Nanami,” he pouts, clinging his face to your face to bug you now. “I was jealous.”
“Aww, poor man,” you snicker, and Satoru’s hurt flutters at the sound of your laugh.
Satoru presses a kiss on your cheek. “C’mon. Come back home.”
You’re about to say yes when a voice low, groggy and sleepy voice coming from the doorstep of the living-room asks:
“What the fuck are you guys doing on my couch?”
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a/n: hello dear readers! 😚 it’s been weeks since i haven’t post anything i’m sorry! i was busy with studies and life, but now i can finally chill out haha. i wrote this when i felt a peak of ovulating so yeah… basically i needed to write this hehe. hope you guys enjoyed it and see you soon <333
tags: @ssetsuka @zara-zara11 @bearwithmoo @elliesndg @lymsfm @mutsu422 @drippymcdrippison @koshhin @v31v3t @wawuwe @catrizzz @sanemistar @monokaix
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flannel-and-rainbows · 2 years ago
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Take the quiz they said, it'll be fun they said
This sounds like a more ideal version of me? Maybe even me in the future if I'm lucky
Lemme just take a uquiz for fun i said
i was naturally obliterated
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no-144444 · 1 month ago
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don’t embarrass me- l.norris
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summary: lando and you have a fight on NYE
pairing: lando norris x fem! reader
୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ
You were angry. Every five seconds you had a friend asking if you and Lando had broken up, all because Maugi (one of Lando’s friends) was trying to make it look like she was with Lando. It was infuriating.
“You alright baby?” Lando whispered as he leant against you, the party already in full swing. You looked fabulous. Silver and gold for the new year. You looked like a million bucks. Yet you felt like a fraud. Every time you saw them together you felt yourself… shrink. Like you had to make room for their friendship. Whenever you’d try to talk to him about it, you were met with more questions than answers, and a lot of aggression.
You didn’t care anymore.
“I’m good,” you smiled. “You?”
“I’m great,” he smirked, pulling your waist into his. “You look fucking gorgeous,” he whispered, dotting kisses against your cheek.
You grinned. “Thanks baby.”
His grip tightened but over his shoulder you saw him. Oscar. Lando’s teammate. Lando’s friend. You had a plan, and you were going to make Lando pay for brushing you off.
“Wanna get out of here-?” Lando had started to speak, but he was cut off when you walked away, and straight into Oscar’s arms. He assumed after a little while, you’d come back. You didn’t. You and Oscar spent all of New Year’s Together, while Lando was stuck with Max and Pietra looking every part the perfect couple.
“Why are you sulking?” Max laughed, clapping Lando on the back.
“She’s gone off with Oscar,” he mumbled, looking up as he leant against the balcony railing.
“He is her best mate,” he pointed out. “Join the conversation, or at least hang off her like you usually do.”
He huffed. “She’s mad at me.”
“What did you do this time?” P asked.
“The whole Maugi thing kind of got to her, and when she’d ask me… I kind of brushed her off. She's been off for weeks.”
“So you fucked up?” Max sighed.
“I fucked up,” he nodded. “And now she’s ignoring me, and it’s 3 minutes to midnight.”
“She’ll let you be her New Year’s kiss, surely,” Max scoffed.
Lando nodded, deciding to go find you, but the uncertainty in his stomach had settled long ago.
He caught you from across the room, the absolute picture of beauty. Dancing haphazardly with Lily as Oscar held both your drinks, you danced, somehow looking somehow carefree and elegant at the same time. He smiled. The anxiety in his chest settled momentarily. You were still you. You were still his. You were just upset.
“It’s almost midnight,” he whispered as he wrapped his arms around your waist from behind, joining you in dancing as Lily excused herself to the bar. The red flashing lights and alcohol in both your systems made your dancing look a lot dirtier than it had intended to be, but alas, he just enjoyed feeling you close.
“Oh yeah?” You asked, turning around to him. “Finding Maugi anytime soon?”
He rolled his eyes. “You think I’d want her over you?”
“You don’t make it look any different,” you scoffed.
“Baby,” he smirked, practically laughing. “You’re the most perfect, incredible, kind, woman I have ever met. I love you. You’re my everything. I’ll admit when you came to me about it, I could’ve responded better, and I’m sorry. I was stressed about the way the media saw it, and I didn’t know how to respond to you. I’m sorry.”
You smirked. “That’s all I needed.”
He giggled, pulling you into him. How had he ever pulled you? He was such a loser when it came to you. He’d do anything.
“Do I get my midnight kiss?” He smiled, his cheeks blushing.
“You’re such a baby,” you chuckled as the timer counted down. You wrapped your arms around his neck. “Don’t ever embarrass me like you have, ever again.”
You pressed your lips to his and bit down on his bottom lip. You made him scared. Is it bad that made him hard?
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pucksandpower · 2 months ago
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Stroke of Midnight
Max Verstappen x Alonso!Reader
Summary: New Year’s Eve sees you crouched under a table, shoving grapes into your mouth as the seconds tick by in a desperate attempt to find love in 2025 … but it just so happens that love finds you a whole lot sooner than you expect
Note: Happy (almost) New Year! Wishing everyone a sweet and fulfilling 2025 ❤️
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The club is too loud, too crowded, too much. Somewhere near the DJ booth, your father is probably breaking it down to the worst remix of an already bad pop song.
You don’t want to know what’s happening. You don’t even want to be here, except here is Monaco on New Year’s Eve, and it’s supposed to be magical. That’s what the internet said when you Googled it this morning. But so far, the magic feels more like sweat and regret.
And desperation. There’s no use pretending otherwise anymore.
Your legs cramp as you shift under the table, pulling your knees to your chest to avoid the sharp heel of a passing stranger. The white tablecloth is a flimsy barrier between you and the chaos outside — limbs, perfume, champagne flutes tipped at precarious angles.
You check your phone. Eleven fifty-seven.
“God,” you whisper to yourself, clutching the little plastic bag in your hand. “This is rock bottom.”
But is it? The thought stops you short. You could argue there’ve been worse moments.
There was your first boyfriend, for starters. The trust fund baby who somehow thought being wealthy made cheating excusable. “It’s not like I need you,” he had said when you caught him. Yeah, no kidding.
Then came the mechanic. Charming, sweet, and exactly what you thought you needed — until you overheard him laughing with his friends about how he only asked you out on a bet. The details are blurry now, but the humiliation is crystal clear.
And, of course, the summer of horror: introducing your third boyfriend to your dad, only to walk in on him rummaging through your father’s underwear drawer. “I just wanted to see what greatness looks like,” he had explained with a sheepish grin, clutching a pair of Fernando Alonso’s boxer briefs like they were relics from the Vatican.
Three strikes. You’re out.
“Not this year,” you mutter, shaking your head. This year, you’re taking things into your own hands.
You dig into the bag, spilling green grapes into your lap. Twelve of them. One for each second before midnight, each representing a wish for the year ahead. You glance at the clock again — eleven fifty-eight now. Two minutes to go.
Someone shifts the table above you, and you nearly choke on your gasp. The tablecloth lifts slightly, and a pair of curious eyes meet yours.
“What the hell?”
It’s a man — dark-haired, stubble-jawed, vaguely familiar, though everyone in Monaco looks like they could be a movie star. He’s crouched, trying to see past the shadows. You stare back, frozen.
“Are you hiding?” He asks, tilting his head. His accent is clipped and Dutch, which somehow makes this all worse.
“Uh — no,” you stammer, holding up a grape like it’s evidence in court. “I’m … I’m doing something. It’s a tradition.”
“Under a table?”
“Yes.”
There’s a pause. He blinks at you, then ducks his head fully under the tablecloth. “Alright, I’ll bite. What kind of tradition involves grapes and hiding under furniture?”
“It’s Spanish.” You’re not sure why you feel defensive, but you do. “You eat twelve grapes, one for each second before midnight, for good luck in the new year.”
“Good luck.” He glances pointedly at the table legs surrounding you. “How’s that working out?”
You scowl. “It’s not midnight yet.”
He snorts. “Fair enough. Carry on.” He starts to retreat, but something stops him. “Wait. Why under the table?”
“Because …” You hesitate, not wanting to explain that part of the superstition involves being in a confined space to focus your intentions. It sounds ridiculous out loud, even to you. “Because it’s quieter down here.”
“Right.” His tone is skeptical, but mercifully, he leaves it at that. “Good luck, grape girl.” He’s gone before you can respond.
The clock ticks closer to midnight. Eleven fifty-nine. You clutch the grapes tighter, willing yourself to focus.
“Okay,” you whisper, heart pounding. “This is it. Love. Luck. Anything but whatever the hell the last three years were.”
You pop the first grape into your mouth as the countdown begins, the music fading just enough for the crowd to yell, Twelve!
It’s sour, but you swallow it quickly, reaching for the next. Eleven!
The third grape is sweeter. Ten!
Someone bumps the table above you, but you keep going. Nine!
The fifth grape tastes like possibility. Eight!
You’re halfway through the sixth when the tablecloth lifts again.
“Sorry, but I just-” It’s him again, the Dutch guy. He ducks under the table fully this time, looking half-apologetic, half-curious. “I couldn’t help it. What happens if you don’t finish in time?”
You glare at him, cheeks puffed like a chipmunk. “Whuh ah oo doin’?”
“Trying to understand the stakes here,” he says, crouching beside you. “It’s fascinating.”
“Go ‘way!” You manage, scrambling for the eighth grape. Five!
“Is this, like, a universal Spanish thing? Or just your family?”
You shove the ninth grape in your mouth, ignoring him. Four!
“You’re really committed,” he notes, watching you chew furiously. “I respect that.”
You jab a finger toward the edge of the tablecloth, signaling him to leave.
“Alright, alright,” he says, hands up in surrender. “Good luck, truly. I hope it works.”
He disappears just as the countdown hits Three!
The eleventh grape is a struggle, but you manage. Two!
You grab the last one, cramming it in just as the crowd roars, One! Happy New Year!
It’s chaos — cheering, champagne popping, music surging back to full volume. You sit there under the table, sticky with grape juice and feeling utterly ridiculous.
“Happy New Year to me,” you mutter, wiping your hands on your dress.
Above you, the tablecloth shifts again.
“I had a feeling you’d make it,” the Dutch guy says, grinning. He’s holding two glasses of champagne. “Figured you might need this.”
You stare at him, utterly baffled. “Do you always bother strangers under tables?”
“Only the ones who look like they’re about to choke on tradition.”
You take the glass hesitantly, unsure whether to thank him or tell him to leave you alone. He raises his own in a toast.
“To luck,” he says simply, his smile oddly sincere.
You sigh, clinking your glass against his. “To luck.”
And for the first time in years, you think it might actually work.
***
The Dutch guy, whose name you still don’t know, doesn’t leave. You expect him to. After all, who bothers someone under a table, offers them champagne, and then sticks around? But here he is, leaning casually against the table, like this is his New Year’s Eve tradition too.
“So,” he says, studying you over the rim of his glass, “how do you know it worked?”
“What worked?”
“The grapes. Your luck in love.”
“It’s not instant,” you reply dryly. “I don’t think someone’s going to walk up and propose to me tonight.”
“Shame,” he says, smirking. “Would’ve been a great story.”
You roll your eyes, standing up carefully to avoid smacking your head on the table. The club is still throbbing with music, the crowd a drunken sea of sequins and suits. Your father is nowhere to be seen, probably charming half the room with drunken stories from his glory days.
The Dutch guy follows you, holding his champagne like it’s an extension of himself.
“So, do I get a name?” He asks.
“Do I get a name?” You counter.
He laughs, setting his glass on a passing waiter’s tray. “Martin. Martin Garrix.”
It clicks immediately. The Martin Garrix. You’ve seen him on magazine covers, his face plastered on Spotify playlists, his name on Coachella lineups.
“Oh,” you say, a little surprised. “You’re that Martin Garrix.”
“Depends,” he says with a grin. “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”
“I haven’t decided yet.”
He laughs again, an easy sound that somehow cuts through the noise around you.
“And you are?”
You hesitate. The last thing you want is to be recognized as Fernando Alonso’s daughter tonight. “Just … me,” you say, shrugging.
“Alright, Just Me,” he teases. “What’s the plan now? Back to the dance floor?”
“I don’t really have a plan.” You glance toward the bar, but it’s swamped. The thought of pushing through that crowd makes your skin crawl.
Martin tilts his head, considering you. “You know,” he says after a moment, “I’ve got to play a set in a bit. But before that, I could introduce you to someone.”
Your brow furrows. “Introduce me?”
“Yeah. A friend of mine. You’ll like him.”
You cross your arms. “Why do I feel like you’re trying to get rid of me?”
“Not at all,” he says, grinning. “But if you’re looking for luck, he’s got plenty of it.”
Before you can argue, he’s already motioning for you to follow him.
Martin weaves through the crowd effortlessly, stopping just long enough to charm security guards and exchange handshakes with people who look vaguely important. You trail behind, clutching your champagne glass like a lifeline.
“VIP,” he explains over his shoulder, as if that answers anything.
“I was in VIP,” you mutter. “Then I left to crawl under a table.”
“Your loss,” he quips.
The VIP section is smaller than you remember, cordoned off with velvet ropes and guarded by men in black suits. Martin flashes a wristband, and the guard steps aside.
You’re led to a booth tucked in the farthest corner, hidden from most of the chaos. Someone is slouched in the corner seat, a drink dangling from his fingers. His head tilts up when Martin approaches, and your stomach flips.
Max Verstappen.
You stop dead in your tracks, heat rushing to your face. Of all the people — of course it’s him.
Max looks at you, then at Martin, then back at you. His brow furrows in confusion, his normally sharp blue eyes a little unfocused.
“Martin,” he says, voice thick with alcohol, “who’s this?”
Martin grins, gesturing toward you. “Stray kitten I found under a table. Thought you might want company.”
You gape at him. “I am not a stray kitten.”
“Could’ve fooled me,” Martin says, completely unbothered.
Max blinks, then sets his drink on the table. “Wait. I know you.”
“Yeah,” you say quickly, “I know you too.”
It’s a terrible response, but you’re too flustered to think straight. Max Verstappen, reigning Formula 1 world champion, is sitting in front of you, looking unfairly handsome even in his clearly drunk state.
Martin claps Max on the shoulder. “I’ll leave you two to it. Don’t scare her off, mate.”
“Wait, what-” You start to protest, but Martin is already disappearing into the crowd.
You’re left standing there awkwardly, clutching your glass like it’s a shield. Max watches you, his expression softening into something unreadable.
“Sit,” he says, gesturing to the empty seat beside him.
You hesitate, then slide into the booth, leaving just enough space between you that it doesn’t feel too intimate.
“So,” he says, leaning back. “What’s this about a table?”
You sigh, rubbing your temple. “It’s a Spanish tradition. You eat twelve grapes at midnight for good luck in the new year. I was under the table to-”
“Focus your intentions,” he finishes, surprising you.
Your eyes widen. “How do you know that?”
“Carlos told me about it once back when we were teammates,” he says with a small smile. “He thought it was funny.”
You relax slightly. “Well, it’s not funny. It’s practical.”
“Under a table, though?” His smile widens.
“It’s quieter!”
He laughs, and it’s the kind of laugh that makes your heart twist in your chest. You’ve always found Max intimidating — cool, calm, untouchable. But right now, with his hair slightly messy and his guard down, he seems … human.
“You’re drunk,” you blurt out.
He nods, unabashed. “A little.”
“A lot,” you correct.
“Fair.” He leans forward, resting his elbows on the table. “But what about you? You’re here on New Year’s Night, eating grapes under tables. What’s that about?”
You hesitate, then shrug. “Bad luck. Bad … everything, really. I figured it couldn’t hurt.”
He studies you for a moment, his gaze steady despite the alcohol. “Bad everything?”
“Love life,” you admit, looking away. “It’s been a disaster.”
“Join the club,” he mutters, taking a sip of his drink.
You glance at him, surprised. “What do you mean? You’re-” You stop yourself, realizing how stupid it sounds. He’s Max Verstappen. He could have anyone.
“Exactly,” he says, reading your expression. “And that’s the problem. No one takes me seriously. They just see the driver, the fame, the money.”
You soften. “That sounds lonely.”
“It is.”
There’s a beat of silence, heavy with unspoken words.
“You know,” he says finally, his voice quieter now, “I always wondered what it’d be like to talk to you.”
Your breath catches. “What?”
“In the paddock. You’re always with your dad, or with someone else. I never knew how to …” He trails off, rubbing the back of his neck. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It does,” you say quickly, surprising yourself. “I always wondered too.”
He looks at you then, really looks at you, and for a moment, the noise of the club fades into the background.
“Yeah?” He asks softly.
You nod, suddenly shy. “Yeah.”
His lips twitch into a small smile. “Maybe Martin was right.”
“About what?”
“Luck.”
You laugh, the sound light and unexpected. “Maybe.”
He leans back, the tension in his shoulders easing. “So, what now? Are you going to wait for the grapes to work, or are we going to make our own luck?”
You raise an eyebrow. “And how do we do that?”
“Well,” he says, a playful glint in his eye, “we could start by getting out of here.”
“And go where?”
“Anywhere,” he says, standing up and holding out his hand.
You stare at his hand, then take it, letting him pull you to your feet.
“Alright,” you say, your heart pounding. “Let’s see where this luck takes us.”
***
The valet pulls up with the car, and it’s … a Ferrari Monza SP2. Of course it is. Sleek, black, and absurdly expensive, it looks like something out of a Bond movie. The kind of car you don’t just drive; you wear it, command it.
Max grins at you as the valet hands him the keys, his drunken sway almost imperceptible — almost. He heads straight for the driver’s side, but you grab his arm before he can open the door.
“Are you serious?” You ask, wide-eyed.
“What?” His expression is equal parts innocence and mischief.
“You’ve been drinking.”
He glances at the keys in his hand, then back at you, shrugging like it’s no big deal. “I’ve had worse nights.”
“Max,” you say firmly, your voice cutting through the noise of passing cars and drunken revelers spilling out onto the Monaco streets. “You’re not driving.”
He raises an eyebrow, his grin widening. “So, what? You’re offering?”
You blink, caught off guard. “I-I didn’t mean-”
But he’s already opening the driver’s side door and stepping aside, holding it open for you with a dramatic flourish. “Your chariot awaits, madam.”
Your first instinct is to argue, to remind him that this is his car and you’re not exactly in the habit of taking over Ferraris from Formula 1 champions unless they’re your father. But the glint in his eye dares you to say yes.
“Fine,” you mutter, slipping past him and sliding into the driver’s seat.
The leather feels luxurious under your fingers, the steering wheel practically begging to be gripped. You know Ferraris — you grew up around them, after all — but this one feels different. It feels … alive.
Max climbs into the passenger seat with surprising agility for someone who’s had more than a few drinks. He looks entirely too pleased with himself, leaning back like he owns not just the car, but the world.
“Where to?” You ask, trying to sound nonchalant as you adjust the seat and mirrors.
He shrugs, a lazy smile on his face. “Surprise me.”
The car roars to life under your hands, the engine purring with a deep, satisfying growl. You pull out of the valet lane and into the Monaco streets, the city lights sparkling like they’ve been sprinkled with diamonds.
You have no plan, no destination in mind. So, you let the roads guide you. Past the harbor, where yachts bob gently against their moorings, and out onto the open road leading away from Monaco.
Max watches you drive, his gaze heavy but not uncomfortable. “You’re good at this,” he says, his voice cutting through the low hum of the engine.
You glance at him, one hand on the wheel. “I should be. My dad made sure I could handle cars before I could even ride a bike.”
He chuckles. “Sounds about right.”
The road begins to curve as you head toward Nice, the city’s glow fading behind you. The winding asphalt hugs the coastline, offering glimpses of the dark sea shimmering under the moonlight.
Max leans his head back against the seat, his eyes half-closed. “This is nice,” he murmurs, almost to himself.
You smile, focusing on the road. “It is.”
The stretch of beach comes out of nowhere, a small, deserted slice of sand tucked between rocky cliffs. You might have driven past it without a second thought, but Max suddenly sits up, pointing wildly.
“Stop!” He yells.
You react instinctively, slamming on the brakes. The tires screech against the pavement, and the car comes to a jarring halt.
“Jesus, Max!” You exclaim, turning to glare at him. “What is wrong with you?”
He’s already unbuckling his seatbelt, his eyes sparkling with excitement. “We’re going skinny dipping.”
“What?”
“You heard me.” He grins like a kid who just discovered a hidden jar of candy. “Come on. The water’s right there.”
You stare at him, dumbfounded. “You can’t be serious.”
“Why not?” He pushes open the door and climbs out, gesturing for you to follow. “It’s New Year’s. Perfect time to do something stupid.”
“Skinny dipping isn’t just stupid, Max. It’s-” You gesture vaguely, your cheeks heating. “It’s ridiculous.”
He leans down, resting his arms on the open car door. “Exactly. That’s the point. Live a little.”
You hesitate, glancing toward the beach. The moonlight glints off the waves, the sound of the surf mingling with the gentle rustle of wind through the grass. There’s no one else around.
“Max,” you start, your voice uncertain.
He tilts his head, his expression softening. “Hey. It’s just water. I won’t look if you don’t want me to.”
You laugh despite yourself, shaking your head. “You’re impossible.”
“And you’re stalling.” He steps back, holding his arms out as if to say, what’s the worst that could happen?
You sigh, unbuckling your seatbelt. “If I freeze to death, I’m haunting you.”
“Deal.”
The sand is cool under your feet as you follow Max toward the water. He’s already pulled off his shirt and pants, tossing them carelessly onto the beach. The moonlight catches on his skin, highlighting the lean muscles of his back.
You hesitate at the water’s edge, the waves lapping at your toes.
“This is crazy,” you mutter, crossing your arms.
“That’s the point,” Max calls over his shoulder, already wading into the surf.
You bite your lip, glancing around one last time to make sure you’re alone. Then, with a deep breath, you pull off your dress, leaving it in a heap beside Max’s clothes.
The water is shockingly cold as you step in, but it’s not unbearable. You wade in deeper, the waves swirling around your waist, then your chest.
Max is already floating on his back a few meters ahead, his arms stretched out like he’s completely at peace.
“See?” He says, his voice carrying over the water. “Not so bad.”
You tread water, glaring at him. “I hate that you’re right.”
He laughs, the sound echoing across the beach. “You’ll get used to it.”
For a while, neither of you says anything. The water is calm, the world around you eerily quiet except for the soft crash of waves.
“This is nice,” you admit finally, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Told you,” he says, tilting his head to look at you. His expression is softer now, less playful. “Thanks for indulging me.”
You shrug, a small smile tugging at your lips. “Thanks for trusting me with your car.”
He grins. “I figured it was in good hands.”
The silence stretches between you again, but it’s not uncomfortable. It feels … easy. Like the two of you have always been here, floating in the moonlit water, sharing something unspoken.
“I’ve always liked you,” Max says suddenly, his voice quiet but firm.
You freeze, your heart skipping a beat. “What?”
He turns onto his side, treading water to face you. “I mean it. For years, I’ve … I don’t know. I never thought you’d feel the same, so I didn’t say anything. But tonight …” He trails off, shaking his head. “I don’t know. It felt like the right time.”
Your throat tightens, your mind racing. You’ve always thought Max was out of your league, untouchable. But here he is, confessing in the most Max way possible — honest, straightforward, no games.
“I’ve always liked you too,” you admit, your voice trembling.
His eyes widen, a slow smile spreading across his face. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
He laughs, the sound full of relief and joy. “Well, I guess the grapes worked after all.”
You roll your eyes, but you’re smiling. “Don’t make me regret this.”
“Never,” he says, his voice soft.
It feels like a promise.
***
When you and Max finally stumble out of the water, shivering and laughing, you head straight to the spot where you’d left your clothes. Only, when you get there, the beach doesn’t look quite the same.
Your dress isn’t where you left it.
“Oh no,” you mutter, scanning the dark sand.
“What?” Max asks, standing next to you, his arms crossed against the cold.
“My clothes.” You point at the waterline, which has crept much closer during your impromptu swim. “The waves must’ve gotten to them.”
Max glances down and then back at you with a smirk. “You mean those clothes?”
You follow his gaze to a small, soggy heap half-buried in the sand.
“Oh, for the love of-” You dart toward them, scooping up your dress and underwear, which are completely soaked and dripping.
Max doesn’t even try to suppress his laugh. “Well, this is awkward.”
“Don’t,” you warn, glaring at him.
“I didn’t say anything!” He holds up his hands defensively, still grinning.
You groan, holding up your dress, which now feels about ten pounds heavier with seawater. “What am I supposed to do? I can’t wear this.”
Max tilts his head, considering. “Guess you’ll have to drive back naked.”
“Max!”
“Kidding, kidding!” He steps closer, tugging his own damp shirt over his head and holding it out to you. “Here. Problem solved.”
You hesitate, eyeing the shirt. “What about you?”
“I’ll live,” he says with a shrug, clearly unbothered by the chilly night air. “Take it.”
You sigh, knowing you don’t have much of a choice. “Fine. Turn around.”
Max smirks but obeys, turning his back to you.
You quickly pull the oversized shirt over your head, the fabric still warm from his body. It smells like him, too — a mix of salt, sweat, and something distinctly Max. You tug it down as far as it will go, grateful that it’s long enough to cover everything important.
“Okay,” you say.
Max turns back around, and his grin is immediate and wide. “Wow.”
“What?” You ask, crossing your arms.
“You look good in my clothes,” he says, his voice dropping slightly.
You roll your eyes, but your cheeks burn at the way he’s looking at you, his gaze lingering a little too long. “You’re impossible.”
“And you’re beautiful,” he counters, his tone light but earnest.
You open your mouth to respond, but the words catch in your throat. Instead, you shake your head, muttering, “Let’s just go.”
Max doesn’t argue, but his grin lingers as the two of you make your way back to the car.
“Where are we going?” Max asks as you slide back into the driver’s seat, the leather cool against your bare thighs.
“I was going to ask you the same thing,” you say, adjusting the mirrors again.
He shrugs, leaning back in his seat. “We could go back to my place.”
You snort. “Why does that sound like the setup to a bad pickup line?”
“Hey,” he protests, mock-offended. “I’m a gentleman.”
You glance at him, raising an eyebrow. “Are you, though?”
“Sometimes,” he says, grinning. “Depends on the company.”
You laugh, shaking your head. “Well, as much as I’d love to see your undoubtedly bachelor-esque apartment, I have a better idea.”
“Oh?”
“My dad’s place,” you say, pulling onto the road.
Max raises an eyebrow. “Fernando’s?”
“He’s not there,” you assure him quickly. “He’s probably still at the club, or passed out somewhere. And I happen to know he stocked the apartment with some really good champagne.”
Max hums, considering. “Fancy champagne, empty apartment … I like the sound of this.”
You smile, turning onto the highway. “I thought you might.”
The drive back to Monaco feels different this time. The adrenaline from the beach has faded, replaced by a quiet comfort. Max sits beside you, his head tilted back against the seat, humming softly to himself.
You glance at him out of the corner of your eye. “You’re not falling asleep, are you?”
He shakes his head, reaching for the radio. “Nope. Just thinking.”
“Dangerous,” you tease.
He laughs, fiddling with the dial until he lands on a station playing 80s hits. The familiar opening chords of Take On Me by A-ha fill the car, and Max immediately starts singing along.
“Talking away,” he belts out, completely off-key but fully committed.
You can’t help but laugh. “Oh my God, Max.”
“What?” He says, grinning at you. “You don’t like my singing?”
“I’m just saying, maybe stick to driving cars.”
He clutches his chest dramatically. “Ouch. That’s harsh.”
The chorus kicks in, and Max leans closer to you, practically shouting the lyrics. “I’ll be gone, in a day or twoooooo!”
You’re laughing so hard you can barely keep your hands steady on the wheel. “You’re ridiculous.”
“And you love it,” he says, winking.
You roll your eyes, but the truth is, you kind of do. There’s something about the way Max is so unapologetically himself, even when he’s being completely ridiculous. It’s endearing in a way you didn’t expect.
The next song comes on — Africa by Toto (not that Toto, the other one) — and Max doesn’t miss a beat, launching into another impromptu performance.
“I bless the rains down in AfricAAAA!”
“Please stop,” you beg, though your cheeks hurt from smiling.
“Never,” he says, grinning at you like this is the most fun he’s had in ages.
And as the lights of Monaco come back into view, you realize you’ve never felt more at ease with someone. Max’s off-tune singing, the salty breeze still clinging to your hair, and the warmth of his shirt against your skin — it all feels like something out of a dream.
“Hey,” Max says suddenly, his voice softer now.
“Yeah?” You glance at him, and for once, he’s not smiling. His expression is thoughtful, almost serious.
“I’m glad it was you tonight,” he says simply.
Your heart skips a beat, but you manage to keep your voice steady. “Me too.”
He turns back to the radio, cranking up the volume as another song starts. And as you drive toward the city, the two of you singing along to the music, it feels like the beginning of something you’re not quite ready to name — but it feels right all the same.
***
The apartment is just as you left it — sleek, minimalist, and undoubtedly your father’s. Clean lines, muted colors, and an expansive view of Monaco’s twinkling lights spilling in through the floor-to-ceiling windows.
Max whistles low as he steps inside, running a hand through his damp hair. “Your dad has good taste.”
You scoff, kicking off your shoes by the door. “He has a good interior designer. There’s a difference.”
Max chuckles, padding after you as you head straight for the kitchen. “Where’s this fancy champagne you promised?”
You open the fridge, scanning its contents. Sure enough, five bottles of Dom Pérignon are lined up like soldiers, condensation clinging to their dark glass.
“Here,” you say, pulling one out and setting it on the marble countertop. “But don’t complain if it ruins you for whatever it is that Formula 1 uses on podiums these days.”
Max grabs two flutes from the cabinet you pointed to and shrugs. “I think I’ll survive.”
You pop the cork with a satisfying pop, pouring the sparkling liquid into the glasses he offers.
“To questionable life choices,” Max says, raising his glass.
You laugh, clinking yours against his. “To new beginnings.”
The first sip is crisp and effervescent, the kind of taste that makes you close your eyes for a second to savor it. Max seems equally impressed, letting out a low hum of approval.
“You weren’t kidding,” he says, taking another sip. “This is good.”
“Only the best for Fernando Alonso,” you say, rolling your eyes.
The two of you settle on the couch, the city lights casting a soft glow over the room. Conversation flows easily, the champagne loosening whatever walls you might have had left after the events of the night.
By the second bottle, you’re both leaning into each other, laughing at stories you’ve never told anyone else.
“So, wait,” Max says, his voice slightly slurred. “You actually punched him?”
“I didn’t punch him,” you correct, giggling. “I just … shoved him. Hard. With my fist.”
Max snorts. “That’s literally a punch.”
“Semantics.” You wave him off, taking another sip of champagne. “He deserved it.”
“Remind me never to get on your bad side,” Max says, shaking his head with a grin.
By the time you open the third bottle, everything is a blur of laughter, shared glances, and a warmth that has nothing to do with the alcohol.
You’re halfway through another story when Max interrupts, leaning closer. “You’ve got …” He gestures vaguely at your face.
“What?” You ask, frowning.
“Hold on.” He reaches out, brushing the corner of your mouth with his thumb. The touch is light, almost hesitant, but it sends a jolt of electricity through you.
“There,” he says softly, his thumb lingering a second too long before he pulls back.
The room feels suddenly smaller, quieter. Your eyes meet his, and for a moment, neither of you says anything.
Then, without thinking, you lean in.
The kiss is messy, fueled by champagne and years of unspoken tension. Max’s lips are soft but insistent, his hands finding your waist and pulling you closer.
You barely register the sound of your glass clattering onto the coffee table as you climb onto his lap, your fingers tangling in his hair.
“Is this okay?” He murmurs against your lips, his breath warm and ragged.
You nod, your hands already tugging at the waistband of his jeans. “More than okay.”
His hands slide under the shirt you’re wearing — his shirt — his palms warm against your skin. The touch makes you shiver, but you can’t tell if it’s from the cold or something else entirely.
“You look so good in this,” he whispers, his lips trailing down your neck.
“Stop talking,” you mutter, pulling him back up for another kiss.
He laughs softly but obeys, his hands roaming freely now, exploring every curve like he’s trying to memorize you.
You lose track of time, of where you end and he begins. The champagne bubbles in your veins, making everything feel hazy and light.
Somehow, you both end up half-naked on the leather sectional, your legs tangled together. Max’s hands stay under the shirt, resting against your waist like he’s anchoring himself to you.
Your hand drifts lower, brushing against the waistband of his briefs. He lets out a low groan, his head falling back against the couch.
“Careful,” he says, his voice thick with a mix of amusement and warning.
You smirk, leaning down to press a kiss to his jaw. “You’re the one who said to live a little.”
He laughs, pulling you back down into another kiss.
Eventually, exhaustion gets the better of both of you. The kisses slow, turning softer, lazier, until you’re both too tired to do anything but collapse against each other.
Max’s arms wrap around you, his body warm and solid beneath you.
“Don’t let me fall asleep like this,” you mumble, your voice muffled against his chest.
“Too late,” he replies, his voice already heavy with sleep.
And as your eyes flutter closed, you can’t help but think that this might be the best questionable life choice you’ve ever made.
***
The first hint of dawn spills into the apartment, a soft, golden hue creeping through the glass walls. The city below comes to life slowly, but up here, in the quiet sanctuary of your father’s apartment, everything feels frozen in time.
You’re vaguely aware of the early morning light as you stir, still half-asleep, tangled in the warmth of Max’s arms. His hands are still under the shirt you’re wearing — his shirt — resting against your bare waist. Your head rests on his chest, his steady heartbeat like a metronome beneath your ear.
You should feel embarrassed, maybe even regretful. Instead, you feel … safe. Content.
The sound of keys jingling outside the door doesn’t register immediately.
Then, the lock turns, and the door creaks open.
“Ah, mierda.”
The low curse comes from the entryway. The unmistakable, groggy voice of your father.
You jolt upright, your blood turning ice-cold as the realization sinks in.
Max stirs beside you, groaning softly. “What’s going on?”
You don’t have time to answer before Fernando appears in the living room doorway, his hair disheveled, his jacket slung over one shoulder, and the beginnings of a hangover etched across his face.
His gaze lands on the two of you — your bare legs, Max’s shirt haphazardly covering you, and the obvious fact that both your pants are nowhere to be seen.
There’s a long, excruciating silence.
“Papá,” you manage to squeak, your voice higher than you intended.
Fernando blinks once, twice. Then his eyes narrow. “What is this?”
Max freezes, his brain clearly struggling to catch up. “Uh …”
You scramble for words, any words, but your mind is a complete blank.
Fernando steps closer, his voice sharp. “You. Verstappen. What are you doing here?”
Max raises a hand, as though he’s trying to surrender. “I can explain-”
“Oh, you better,” Fernando interrupts, his tone dark. “Because from where I’m standing, this looks like …” He gestures vaguely at the two of you, his expression a mix of disbelief and fury. “… a very bad decision.”
You hastily pull a throw pillow over your lap, trying to muster some semblance of dignity. “It’s not what it looks like.”
Fernando arches a brow. “It looks like I came home to find my daughter and Max Verstappen half-naked on my couch.”
“Okay, so maybe it’s a little what it looks like,” you admit, cringing.
Max finally seems to snap out of his stupor. He sits up, running a hand through his already messy hair. “Listen, Fernando, I-”
“You don’t get to call me Fernando,” your father snaps. “Not right now.”
“Okay,” Max backtracks quickly, holding up his hands. “Look, this isn’t her fault. It’s on me.”
You turn to him, frowning. “Max-”
“No, it’s true,” he continues, his voice steady despite the situation. “I shouldn’t have let things get … out of hand.”
Fernando crosses his arms, his eyes narrowing further. “Out of hand?”
“I mean-” Max stumbles over his words, clearly realizing he’s digging himself deeper. “It’s not like we planned for this to happen.”
Fernando’s gaze flicks to you, his expression unreadable. “Is that true?”
You open your mouth, then close it, your cheeks burning. “Well … yes. Kind of.”
“Kind of?”
“It’s complicated!” You blurt out, throwing your hands up in frustration.
Fernando pinches the bridge of his nose, muttering something under his breath that you’re pretty sure isn’t complimentary.
“I don’t even know where to start,” he says after a moment, his voice tight. “You-” He points at Max. “Why are you even here?”
“We were … celebrating,” Max says hesitantly.
“Celebrating,” Fernando repeats flatly. “By taking your pants off on my couch?”
“Okay, that part was-” Max starts, but you cut him off.
“Can we not talk about pants right now?” You plead, your face hot enough to fry an egg.
Fernando gives you a look that could melt steel. “No, we’re absolutely going to talk about it. What were you thinking?”
“Maybe we weren’t thinking,” you admit quietly, avoiding his gaze.
“That much is obvious,” he mutters.
“Papá, please,” you say, your voice softening. “It’s not like we meant to disrespect you or your home.”
Fernando sighs, the anger in his expression giving way to something else — disappointment. It stings more than you care to admit.
Max shifts uncomfortably beside you, breaking the silence. “I know this looks bad-”
“It is bad,” Fernando interrupts. “Do you have any idea what this could do to your reputation? To hers?”
Max frowns, his jaw tightening. “With all due respect, I care more about her than my reputation.”
Your breath catches at his words, but Fernando doesn’t seem impressed.
“Convenient to say that now,” he mutters, crossing his arms again.
Max’s expression hardens. “It’s the truth.”
The tension in the room is suffocating, the silence stretching out until you can’t take it anymore.
“Can we just … take a minute?” You say, looking between them. “Please?”
Fernando stares at you for a long moment, his expression softening just a fraction. “Fine. One minute.”
He turns on his heel, muttering something under his breath yet again as he storms toward the kitchen.
As soon as he’s out of earshot, you let out a shaky breath, turning to Max.
“This is a disaster,” you whisper.
Max reaches for your hand, his touch grounding. “We’ll figure it out.”
“How?” You ask, your voice tinged with panic.
He squeezes your hand gently. “Together.”
Despite everything, his confidence is reassuring. You take another deep breath, trying to steady yourself.
“Okay,” you say quietly. “Together.”
Fernando’s voice cuts through the moment from the kitchen. “You better be decent when I come back.”
Max lets out a low chuckle, and you can’t help but smile despite the situation.
“Let’s just survive the next five minutes,” you murmur, standing to pull on your still-damp jeans.
Max grins up at you, his eyes warm. “I like our odds.”
You glance toward the kitchen, where your father is undoubtedly fuming, and pray he’s right.
***
The tension in the room is suffocating as your father storms back from the kitchen, a cup of coffee in his hand and a sharp glare aimed squarely at Max. You sit on the edge of the couch, trying to make yourself as small as possible. Max, to his credit, doesn’t flinch under the weight of Fernando’s gaze, though his posture is tense, shoulders squared like he’s bracing for impact.
Fernando takes a long sip of his coffee before setting the cup down on the counter with a decisive clink. “Alright,” he says, folding his arms across his chest. “Let’s talk.”
Max leans forward, his elbows on his knees. “I-”
Fernando holds up a hand, cutting him off. “No. I’ll talk first. You’ll listen.”
Max glances at you briefly, then nods. “Okay.”
Your father steps closer, his eyes narrowing. “So. Verstappen. Tell me — were you trying to sleep with my daughter under my own roof?”
The bluntness of the question makes you choke on air. “Papá!”
“Stay out of this,” Fernando says sharply, not even sparing you a glance. His eyes are locked on Max, who blinks in surprise before straightening in his seat.
“No!” Max says quickly, his voice firm. “Of course not.”
Fernando tilts his head, his lips twitching as though he’s fighting back a smirk. “Oh, so she’s not attractive enough for you to want to sleep with?”
“What?” You gasp, standing up. “What is wrong with you?”
“Sit down,” Fernando says over his shoulder, though there’s an unmistakable gleam of amusement in his eyes.
Max looks like he’s been thrown into the deep end of a pool without warning. “That’s not — what? No!”
Fernando raises an eyebrow. “No, she’s not attractive, or no, you weren’t trying to sleep with her?”
Max glares at him, his jaw tightening. “You’re twisting my words.”
“Am I?” Fernando says, taking another slow sip of his coffee.
“Yes!” Max snaps, then seems to catch himself. He exhales, running a hand through his hair. “Look, I wasn’t trying to disrespect you or your home. I swear.”
Fernando steps closer, looming over Max. “You swear, huh?”
“Yes,” Max says firmly.
“And yet,” Fernando says, gesturing at the couch with a dramatic wave of his hand, “I walked in on this. My daughter, half-naked, tangled up with you.”
You groan, burying your face in your hands. “Oh my god, stop.”
Fernando ignores you. “Explain that, Verstappen.”
Max meets his gaze, unflinching. “I care about her. That’s the truth.”
Fernando’s eyebrows lift slightly, but he doesn’t respond immediately. He paces a few steps, tapping his fingers against his coffee cup as though mulling over his next move.
Finally, he stops, turning back to Max. “You care about her,” he repeats, his tone skeptical.
“Yes,” Max says, his voice unwavering.
Fernando tilts his head again, studying Max like he’s a puzzle he’s trying to solve. “Alright. Let’s test that.”
Max frowns. “Test what?”
“Your commitment,” Fernando says simply.
You groan again, standing up. “Papá, this isn’t some kind of-”
“Sit,” Fernando says, pointing at the couch.
“Stop telling me to sit!” You snap, but you drop back down anyway, crossing your arms over your chest.
Fernando turns back to Max, a small, mischievous smile playing at the corners of his mouth. “So. Verstappen. If you care about her, you won’t mind answering a few questions.”
Max hesitates but nods. “Alright.”
Fernando sets his coffee cup down again, cracking his knuckles for dramatic effect. “First question. Do you even know her middle name?”
Max’s eyes flick to you, then back to Fernando. “Of course I do. It’s-” He pauses, frowning. “Wait. Do you have one?”
Fernando lets out a bark of laughter. “Strike one.”
You roll your eyes. “Max, I don’t have a middle name. Don’t listen to him.”
Max glares at Fernando. “That’s not fair.”
“Life isn’t fair,” Fernando says with a shrug. “Next question. What’s her favorite color?”
Max’s frown deepens. “Pink?”
Fernando shakes his head. “Wrong.”
“Wrong?” Max turns to you. “It’s not pink?”
“It’s not pink,” you confirm, biting back a smile.
Fernando smirks. “Strike two.”
Max leans back, exhaling slowly. “Alright. What is it, then?”
Fernando opens his mouth, but you cut him off. “It’s burgundy.”
“Burgundy,” Max repeats, nodding to himself. “Got it.”
“Too late,” Fernando says, waving him off. “You’re already failing.”
“Papá,” you say, your tone a warning.
Fernando raises his hands in mock surrender. “Fine, fine. One last question.”
Max leans forward again, his expression determined. “Go ahead.”
Fernando’s smirk returns. “What are your intentions with my daughter?”
The question hangs in the air like a loaded gun.
Max doesn’t flinch. He meets Fernando’s gaze head-on and says, “I don’t know yet.”
You blink in surprise, as does your father.
Max continues, his voice steady. “But I know I want to figure it out. I care about her, and I want to spend more time with her. That’s all I can say right now.”
Fernando studies him for a long moment, his expression unreadable.
Then, to your astonishment, he nods. “Fair enough.”
“Fair enough?” You echo, staring at him in disbelief.
Fernando shrugs, picking up his coffee cup again. “At least he’s honest.”
Max lets out a breath he probably didn’t realize he was holding, and you shake your head, still trying to process what just happened.
“Just one thing,” Fernando adds, turning back to Max with a pointed look.
“What’s that?” Max asks cautiously.
Fernando leans in slightly, his voice low but firm. “If you hurt her, I’ll make sure you regret it.”
Max doesn’t hesitate. “Understood.”
Fernando nods once, then steps back, his demeanor relaxing slightly. “Good. Now, get dressed. Both of you.”
You groan, covering your face with your hands again. “This is the worst day of my life.”
“Could’ve been worse,” Max says, nudging you gently.
You glare at him, but there’s a small smile tugging at your lips despite everything.
Fernando smirks, heading toward his bedroom. “You’ve got ten minutes before I come back with more questions.”
“Papá!” You call after him, but he’s already gone.
Max chuckles softly, leaning back on the couch. “That went well, all things considered.”
You stare at him, incredulous. “You think that went well?”
He grins, shrugging. “I’m still alive, aren’t I?”
You can’t help but laugh, shaking your head. “You’re unbelievable.”
“And you like me anyway,” he says, his grin widening.
You roll your eyes, but you don’t argue.
***
One Year Later
The club is just as loud and chaotic as it was a year ago, but it feels different this time. Maybe it’s the crowd, maybe it’s the glow of the New Year’s lights, or maybe it’s the fact that Max’s hand hasn’t left yours all night.
You’re back where it all started, tucked into the VIP section of the Monaco club where you had once crouched under a table eating grapes in a last-ditch attempt to find love. That night had been nothing short of chaotic, but looking back, it had been the beginning of something you wouldn’t trade for the world.
“Is it how you remembered it?” Max asks, leaning in close to be heard over the music.
You glance around at the glittering lights and pulsing crowd, then back at him. “It’s definitely less embarrassing this time around.”
Max grins, brushing a thumb over your knuckles. “I don’t know. You were pretty cute in your desperation.”
You groan, nudging him with your shoulder. “Are you ever going to let me live that down?”
“Not a chance,” he says, laughing. “It’s one of my favorite stories to tell.”
“Great. Glad my suffering is so entertaining for you,” you tease, though you can’t help but smile.
Max tugs you closer, his voice softer now. “You know, I’m really glad you ate those grapes.”
You look up at him, your heart fluttering at the way his eyes crinkle when he smiles. “Me too.”
The DJ announces that it’s nearly midnight, and the crowd buzzes with excitement. Max pulls you to your feet, his hands resting lightly on your waist.
“Ready to count down?” He asks, his voice warm and low.
“With you? Always,” you say, grinning.
The countdown begins, and the energy in the room spikes. You can feel the excitement in the air, the anticipation of a new year, a fresh start.
“Ten!” The crowd shouts.
Max’s hands tighten slightly on your waist, and you lean into him, your pulse racing.
“Nine!”
You look up at him, your eyes locking.
“Eight!”
His gaze softens, his smile turning gentle.
“Seven!”
You bite your lip, butterflies fluttering in your stomach.
“Six!”
Max leans down, his forehead brushing against yours.
“Five!”
Your breath catches as the noise of the crowd fades into the background.
“Four!”
“Three!”
“Two!”
You close your eyes, tilting your head up.
“One!”
Midnight strikes, and Max’s lips meet yours, soft and certain. The room erupts in cheers and confetti, but all you can focus on is the way he’s holding you, like you’re the only person in the world.
The kiss deepens, his hands sliding to your back, pulling you closer. You smile against his lips, your heart full and light-
Only to be rudely interrupted by someone literally wedging themselves between you.
“Alright, break it up!”
You stumble back a step, blinking in surprise. Max looks just as stunned, his hands still midair where they’d been resting on your waist.
Fernando stands between you, his arms crossed and a deeply unimpressed look on his face. “Leave room for Jesus.”
You gape at him, your cheeks burning. “Papá! What the hell are you doing?”
“I think the better question,” he says, looking pointedly at Max, “is what you two were doing.”
Max stares at him, then throws his hands up. “We were kissing. It’s New Year’s!”
Fernando raises an eyebrow. “And you couldn’t do that with a little more … decorum?”
“You’re not even religious!” You protest, exasperated.
Fernando smirks, clearly enjoying himself. “And that’s why, by Jesus, I mean me.”
Max blinks. “You mean … you?”
You stare at your father, your frustration warring with the urge to laugh. “Are you serious right now?”
“Completely,” Fernando says, deadpan. “Now, why don’t we all take a nice step back, breathe, and reflect on the fact that I’m allowing this relationship to exist at all.”
“Allowing?” Max echoes, crossing his arms. “With all due respect, I don’t think you get to allow anything anymore.”
Fernando turns to him, one eyebrow raised. “Oh, is that so?”
“Yes,” Max says firmly. “We’re adults. And we’re together. Whether you approve or not.”
Fernando looks at him for a long moment, then lets out a low chuckle. “Well, at least you’ve got guts.”
“More than that,” you interject, stepping between them. “He’s good to me. Better than anyone else ever has been. And I love him.”
Fernando’s smirk fades, replaced by something softer. He looks at you, his expression unreadable, then nods slowly. “I know.”
“You know?” You ask, surprised.
He shrugs. “Of course I know. I’m your father.”
Max exchanges a glance with you, clearly just as confused. “So … what’s with all the drama, then?”
Fernando grins, stepping back. “Because it’s fun.”
You groan, burying your face in your hands again. “I can’t believe this.”
Max laughs, pulling you into his side. “I can.”
Fernando claps Max on the shoulder, his grin widening. “Happy New Year, Verstappen. Don’t screw it up.”
Max meets his gaze, his expression serious. “I won’t.”
Fernando nods, then turns to you. “And you — try to keep him out of trouble, will you?”
You smile, leaning into Max. “I’ll do my best.”
Fernando waves you off, disappearing back into the crowd with a casual, “Don’t make me come back over here.”
Max watches him go, then turns to you, shaking his head. “Your dad’s insane.”
“Welcome to my world,” you say, laughing.
He grins, leaning down to kiss you again. This time, no one interrupts.
2K notes · View notes
lovebugism · 4 months ago
Note
for your smut request ☺️ eddie seeing the love marks he left on reader and getting turned on all over again remember how it got there in the first place 🫶🏻
thank u for requesting :D — the one where eddie realizes quitting smoking would be a whole lot easier than quitting you (established relationship, allusions to smut 18+ | 0.9k)
You lie in the center of Eddie’s bed, trying hard to catch your breath, while the boy rolls off the squeaking mattress on tingling limbs. 
You hear him chuck the used condom into the bin by the nightstand as he goes. He tugs plaid boxers up lanky legs, then fishes for the pack of cigs left in his discarded jeans in one fell swoop. His movements are so practiced now they seem almost fluid. Or maybe that’s just the honeyed haze leftover in your heavy eyes.
Eddie opens the window with one hand, then brings the other up to his mouth. He plucks a cigarette from the carton with his lips and leaves the rest on the sill. A midnight breeze billows past his flushed cheeks and wild curls before finding you. It feels like silk against your buzzing, bare skin.
He cups a hand over his mouth to light the stick. The amber flame makes his face glow. Suddenly, everything smells of sex, nicotine, and midnight air.
You writhe under the thin sheets to stretch your aching limbs before mustering a small smile at the boy across the room. “Smoking after sex is so cliche,” you joke in contented slurs.
“Well, it’s your fault,” the boy insists as grey smoke billows from his rosy mouth. He flicks the filter end of the cigarette to dispel the ash in the ceramic tray, then stretches his arms over his head. It leaves his milky white torso on display for you. Your mouth waters with the urge to run your lips over each of his fading tattoos.
“Is it?” you hum.
“Mhmm,” Eddie nods wordlessly. He sticks the cig back in his mouth and mumbles through it. “If you weren’t so needy, I wouldn’t be smokin’ so much.”
A beam tugs at your lips, threatening to fill the lamplit bedroom with sunshine. You cage it between your teeth because both of you know Eddie was the so-called needy one no more than ten minutes ago –– panting in your ear as he fucked sloppily into you, and leaving his pathetic little whimpers there, too.
“Please cum,” he begged against your skin as his thrusts lost rhythm, weighed down by his own need for release. “Please cum for me. I need to feel it. Need to feel it so bad, baby. Please.”
You watch the memory replay itself in Eddie’s faraway gaze. The notion makes your chest go warm. “Well, you have my deepest sympathies, Eddie Spaghetti,” you murmur in response, soft and sarcastic.
Eddie lifts a pale shoulder in a lazy shrug. “It’s okay,” he mumbles back, cigarette bobbing on his bottom lip. “I can just bill you for all the packs I’m goin’ through.”
“Or we can just stop having sex?” you offer with a knowing lilt to your voice, rising to sit further up on the pillows. You clutch the sheets to your bare chest and look at the boy beneath your lashes. “That’s free, at least.”
Eddie nods, eyes squinted in feigned curiosity. “Hm... That’s definitely an interesting proposition,” he hums with his head angled towards the window to blow smoke out of.
“I mean, I have plenty of toys to keep me occupied––”
“And by toy, I assume you’re talking about Steve The Hair Harrington?” Eddie tries to joke, though his poorly concealed jealousy goes unentertained.
“––But I think you’ll get tired of your right hand very quickly.”
“Hey,” Eddie pouts. “You know I’m ambidextrous. I can switch it up.”
“So, it’s settled then?” you shrug. “No more sex.”
Eddie bows his head sheepishly, silently calculating a way to get him out of the hole he dug for himself. He snuffs the cigarette out in the ashtra, and his eyes flit to the opened box of condoms on his dresser, all but calling his name.
“Well… I mean… We still have eleven condoms left, so…”
You meet his brown-eyed look of expectancy with a cynical smirk. “You see eleven condoms, I see eleven minutes of my life I’m never getting back,” you quip.
Eddie stalks towards you on long legs, brows furrowed in a pitiful look. “Stop being mean to me. I’ll fall in love with you––” he whines playfully, leaning over the mattress with the intent to kiss you. His eyes fall to the blossoming bruises on your neck, and he stops short. “Jesus…”
“What?” you murmur in a mousy voice, eyes wide and glittering.
“Nothin’,” Eddie blurts as he raises his hand to run his fingers over your warm skin. He traces the blooming blood vessels over your collarbone, and his face screws with worry. “Do these hurt?” he wonders aloud.
“Do these?” you echo, motioning to the scratches on his shoulders he hasn’t bothered to notice until now. You didn’t even know you were leaving them there, in truth, as you held onto the boy for dear life while he fucked you within an inch of your own.
Eddie tucks his chin to his chest and tries to eye the scrapes from his peripheral vision. He spots four lines of raging red and puffed-up skin. They feel almost like battle scars –– an aching that he’s proud of.
“A little,” he shrugs, then smiles proudly to himself. “They feel good, though.”
“So do these,” you hum.
His heavy eyes fall to your neck again. His mouth waters at the sight of the lovebites littered there. “Want some more?” he offers lowly.
“I thought we had a deal, Eds? No more sex,” you tease as the boy leans further into kiss you. You smell nicotine and sex on his breath, and your head starts to swim.
“We never shook on it,” Eddie insists, right before kissing you hard enough to steal the breath from your lungs.
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landiary · 4 months ago
Text
privacy ☆ lee heeseung
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pairing stepbro!hee x afab!reader
genre smut.
warning dry humping. masturbating. choking. face fucking (m&f). cowgirl. spanking. overstimulation. squirt. creampie. not proofread.
a/n based in a dream i had, i LITERALLY been writing this during a whole month and finally it’s done hope u like itttt
words 3,5k
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in your house, privacy was not something that your parents considered important, so you always fight demanding your privacy, where you would find shouts from your mother who said "do you have something to hide from us?" or from your father, using the same words as always "dont even think about bringing a guy home."
so you always ended up in your room with the only shoulder you could cry on, heeseung’s, your stepbrother. there were no problems with him, he was the most understanding and the one who always fought with you in some arguments, confronting your parents. although most of the time he was not at home, as he is an adult he work for living and can go a whole week without showing up.
his room? it was a complete mystery. since you couldn't maintain privacy with your parents, you kept it between the two of you. the only thing you knew was that he had a gaming pc, a shelf with some devilish plushies, and more things than any room would have.
it was a midnight friday, you used to call your friends to gossip, but in this case they wanted to play video games. you grabbed your laptop and turned it on, but it didn't take long for it to start working wrong. "this shit doesn't work!" you silently shouted out of respect for your parents who were already sleeping.
"please, y/n i told you to use heeseung's." your friend said via discord call. "im considering it, but if he found out he'd kill me." you laughed despite wanting to cry at the slowness of your laptop. your other friend, decided to speak, "will never find out. hes a man, thinks with his dick, not his head." was what encouraged you to hang out the discord call and go ahead.
this week was one of those where hee was gone for days, and you were ovulating specially to make bad decisions. barefoot, in front of the door of his room with a sign that said in capital letters "DO NOT ENTER", you silently entered. a scent of man's cologne was your first impression upon entering, however when you turned on the light, it left a lot to be desired. it was small, but considering that he was almost gone, it was just the right and necessary size. a small closet, a large bed, as was said before, his computer and the shelves of weird plushies.
"did it." you said to both girls. you felt weird. so comfortable in a gaming chair, clearly hearing every sound with those headphones, with such a large screen in front, dim led lights in the background.
you felt guilty, but you couldn't help but do it, so it happened about three more times.
the first day, it was to play with your friends. second day, you did the same thing, however you were so tired that you didn't make it to your room, so you ended up sleeping in heeseung's bed.
the third day was sunday. your friends were responsible women, so they weren't going to play video games on a sunday night, but you decided to play the sims 4 all night. you lost track of time, but you got bored quickly and deleted your game so as not to leave a trace that you were there.
the headache was present the moment you left the computer, and under the dim lights you began to explore heeseung's room as if it were an escape room. at this point, you didn't give a shit about privacy.
his closet had the most delicious smell in the world: man. all his closet were messy and the drawers even more so. the desk was something you had been looking at for a while from sitting in front of the pc, but you never realized the mess of pens and meaningless sketches that were lying around. you wanted to give him a helping hand and clean him up but the idea was that he would never realize you were there.
finally, the plushies shelf. how is it that a man can collect this shit? you may ask. he was a special guy, because his plushies were disgustingly horrible that they were even scary. you grabbed one, and you were surprised at how soft the fur was. "now i understand why he likes them." you said to yourself.
you don't know if it was that you felt high by his cologne, but a not very holy idea came to your mind after touching the plushie. still with that weird ass bear in your hands, you walked to his bed, threw yourself face down and began to look at it. it was a bear with sharp teeth and red eyes. you already knew what you had to do.
you leaned the stuffed animal's face against the bed, not intending to see it, and knelt on it. you gasped from the pressure, but you quickly got used to it. you had nowhere to hold onto, so you went to the edge of the bed and grabbed onto the bed frame platform.
the swaying of your hips against the soft texture of that stuffed bear made you stop panting and start moaning moderately. for more excitement, you lifted your shirt leaving your bare breasts to crash against the cold atmosphere of that room. one hand holding your trembling body and the other massaging one of your tits, which had a sensitive nipple.
your legs started to get tired and your body started to ask for more. bored of continuing to rub yourself with the plushie, you pushed it aside and lay down while putting your hands inside your panties. you were clearly soaking wet. "so fuckin sorry, hee." followed by a moan, ready not to move until you cum undone on his bed.
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since heeseung had returned home, you didn't go back to his room. that day you preferred not to remember. you almost took the risk of him finding you, because it was the same day he came home, but you woke up to the sounds of cats fighting on the ceiling and you were able to get back to your room sooner.
he never said anything to you, he didn't complain about anything, but it was weird for you to see how he was inside your room without even knocking on the door. "come with me” he said straight and firm. "hee, did something happen?"
"don't make me repeat myself." as he came out of your room, you ran after him.
in just seconds you regretted everything you did because knowing how he is, for some reason you thought he could have noticed. and yes, you take responsibility because you knew he was very angry.
when you reach the door of his room, he opens it leaving you the pass free, two steps were enough to make him also inside and close the door very tightly behind him.
"why don't you act surprised?" he asks, sitting in front of the pc without even looking at you. "why should I be?" you answer with another question. nerves get on you, and you had flashbacks of THAT night because of how your legs were shaking right now. you couldn't do anything because of the shame and guilt.
heeseung leaned back on the gaming chair, which by the way, is reclining. "first, i realized that some things weren't in place. i thought it was simply cuz i get home high as fuck, but i decided to trust my instinct." he paused before continuing. "do you like dim lights? cuz i think you weren't smart enough to notice a very important detail with the lights off." when you looked up your eyes were terrified to see a red light flickering from a small camera.
"heeseung, i-" he interrupted you. "i watched everything, y/n." you didn't want to maintain eye contact but you couldn’t take your eyes off him, you knew perfectly well that on his screen was that fucking image of sunday night. he got up from his chair and slowly approached you. "can't believe my stepsister turned out into a slutty whore."
with a pre-assembled cigarette, he took a puff and blew the smoke in your face. "instead of doing it in your room, you needed to do it in someone else's bed?" purposely set the ironic tone in the question. he put the cigarette in his mouth and he threw you on your back to the bed, without any kind of softness. "you know what's the best thing about all of this?" your legs separated by heeseung’s knee, which wasn't that far from brushing against your crotch. "that fucking bear still has your scent." imagining him smelling the bear made you feel like a patch of moisture was making on your panties. "think i'll have to teach you manners, don't i?"
your parents weren't at home, it was just you and him, so the silence became noisy when your thoughts prevented you from answering him. heeseung’s hands gently lifted your chin, worthlessly forcing you to look him in the eye. "i know how you feel, i wouldn't be able to look you in the eye either if i had done what you did," his thumb moved from your chin to your jugular. "but i didn't cuz i do respect your privacy."
"stop talking about privacy." your demanding tone surprised him a bit, which made him laugh wryly. "god, y/n... you do it on purpose, don't you?" considering that his hand was on your neck, he pressed down. "you're a big girl... big girls take responsibility for what they do, right?" your throat wouldn't let you speak so you just nodded your head.
the image of what came next did not displease you at all. you took responsibility for your mistakes even though you enjoyed it more than in your own bed. he was furious, all he saw was red, you could tell by the way he spoke, the way he was grabbing you, and how his lips moved desperately over yours. following the kiss didn't help to diminish his strength over you, but it did help a bulge in his pants to grow.
his knee subconsciously touched your crotch. heeseung noticing this, he lowered his knee from the bed and stopped kissing you, but both were still connected by your saliva. "can't let you have the same pleasure again, princess, you were very disrespectful." he kept his hand on your neck at all time, but then decided to wipe away the saliva dripping from your mouth with his thumb. "how about you focus on me?"
roles had changed. he was sitting on the bed in his unzipped jeans, while you kept your sanity to endure the knee pain. heeseung never let you go. after a "can you do that for me, pretty?" and accessing, the two of you continued to connect to each other through touch.
his hand grabbed yours to make you touch his marked bulge. was it necessary? no, you knew how to pull and suck it very well. but this isn't about what you know or don't know, it's about your mistake and making him feel good. no matter how much your hand was guided, the sensation of its length made your mouth water. he was big as fuck, you knew it very well.
heeseung was panting from movements he made himself, until he finally let you do it by yourself. besides the fact that it was thick, you could feel how hard it was under the thin fabric, so it didn't take long for you to release it. it bounced and slammed into hee's abdomen, making him shudder. his pink tip had precum, which you decided to make disappear with your tongue. the tip fits, the rest didn't.
the only help he gave you was to grab your hair so it wouldn't bother you while you were doing yhe blowjob.
you kept making circles on his tip, but since it also needed more attention at the base, you used your hand. "just like that." you smiled a little when you heard that, seeing it in a way you never imagined seeing. all horny and needy, panting for a little touch.
you looked up to see him and you took a sublime scene. eyes shut, lips swollen from blocking moans, jaw clenched, heavy panting. the fact that you both must surely have been recorded by the cameras installed, turned you on even more. the lower part of your hips were humping the floor with need, need which heeseung felt. his eyes didn't open completely, yet his eyes penetrated your aura.
it did not help at all to maintain his position. his dick squirmed in your mouth and without warning painted your mouthwalls white, forcing you to swallow. "fuck..." he groaned before collapsing on his bed. you tried to do something to provoke him again, the first thing that came to your mind was to climb on his lap, but in one quick movement he got you on all fours.
your shorts weren't a hindrance for him, because the thin fabric was easy to handle. "i can tell you don't need any prep, don't you?" you seemed to be very wet from what he saw through your panties, but after knowing the size of his member you thought that it was impossible to get in there. "i have no choice but to fuck the shit out of you if you stay that quiet."
"no..." you said quickly, desperately. "no, hee, please." you weren't sure if you were going to convince him just by begging him. "i'll be a good girl from now on, but please..." an unconscious moan came out of your mouth, and the fabric was starting to bother you. "eat me out."
"and do you think you deserve it?" you could feel his powerful gaze against your ass. "no, i don't deserve it at all, but if my mouth couldn't handle that massive cock, i doubt my cunt will." heeseung's index finger went to your waistband and pulled it down. within seconds he took your place, kneeling on the floor to appreciate your drooling pussy.
"taste me." you dared to say. "keep your mouth shut." he said with the same tongue with which he began to gave you a head. unfortunately, you couldn't listen to him and keep quiet. at least not when he was doing his job so well.
the wet sound of you being devoured by the mouth of that hungry man made you even more horny. your moans threatened to come out and you scratched the sheets. you wondered if he did it with such eagerness because he had really wanted to do it for a long time or just because he felt like it. you didn't know, you didn't care, all you wanted to do was untie the knot he had created in your abdomen and release it all in his mouth.
"heeseung..." he had asked you to be quiet a while ago, but the way you said his name had his cock twitching. he kept the same speed, he was being so gentle that it was starting to get boring. you tried to rub your hips on him but it was impossible, his hands caught you to keep you still the moment you tried to give yourself more pleasure than he was giving you. without saying a word, he told you everything.
"can you go faster?" you asked in a low tone. Your face turned red as Heeseung stopped licking you and stared at you. "you see?..." you were quiet making eye contact with him. "it's not that hard to say what you want, pervert." as quickly as he could finish his sentence, he kept eating you like a fucking god, this time being much rougher and faster than last time.
it was already impossible to keep your arms steady with your body trembling from your growing orgasm. your moans hit the mattress drowning them, and the warmth he gave you began to create sweat drops falling down your forehead. "hee... fu-" you were confused. his tongue stopped being in it’s place at the moment you needed it most, you were about to cum. "what the-" heeseung lay next to you on the bed, his cock was again hard and exposed, he had nothing on his bottom part. "you wanna cum? show me how it's done."
in order not to look desperate, as much as you needed it, you decided to approach slowly. you lay on it, not lying down completely, and with your bare hands you lined up its cock in your pussy, brushing the tip. you couldn't help but let out a gasp, which had a quick response from heeseung. "don't tease stepsis." "you were literally teasing me all afternoon, i can do it too, can't i?" heeseung let out a nasal laugh wanting to cover up moans. "know your place princess. now, bounce on me."
you moved its tip a little more and then stuck it in your driveway. if his fat dickhead made you feel that tight, you didn't want to imagine what was going to happen to the rest of his cock. you threw your head back and filled yourself with courage to put the rest in. your throat built a sublime moan for the man's ears.
you had to deal with your own weight for a while, jumping on him slowly so you wouldn't get tired too quickly. you opened your asschecks so you could had more access. if heeseung hadn't eaten you out, you're sure you wouldn't be able to move that easily.
heeseung didn't take his eyes off your clothed breasts. he had both hands free until he finally decided to touch you. his right hand went to hold one of your hips, the other went to lift your baby tee, underneath that you didn't have a bra, so it was easy for your stepbrother to let your breasts free.
"if i had known you were going to be so good to me, i would have fucked you before." his two hands on your hips were a help to make a more fluid moves, also his words made you so wetter. you lied down "need you so much." you murmured over his ear, sending a shiver down his spine.
the pace was frenetic, both skins colliding and moans mingling in the air. a spanking echoed throughout the room, your sensitive skin soon turned red drawing heeseung's big hand.
he felt like you were stroking him, your pussy clenched by a lot of stimulation. you sat on him again, this time increasing speed and rubbing your clitoris. "you're getting tight..." he said. you kept bouncing over him even though you were already trembling over him. he could tell you were about to cum.
"can i cum?" stared you in the eye. "please, please, can i cum? i need to." he felt your legs squeeze his hips. the hand with which you rubbed your was replaced with his, that’s was his answer. those fingers were nimble and fast, you gushed around him, dripping all over his abdomen and a little from his bed.
you lay on heeseung, resting your head on his shoulder, but the two of you were still connected. heeseung continued on his own when he saw that you were already done, following the same rhythm, but causing his tip to hit your g-spot.
"are you on the pill?" you nodded impatiently. heeseung used his strength to keep your hips still, his pelvis was constantly crashing very hard and fast against your skin, pounding into you. and you who were already sensitive because of your squirt, couldn't stop complaining with incoherent sounds coming out of your weak mouth. "hee... 's too.. much!" you cried out.
finally, he split his seed inside you, and his cock came out of you.
both of you collapsed and remained silent for a few minutes. it took you a while to realize the situation you were in. hugging your stepbrother on his bed, after the best fuck of your life.
you opened your eyes for a moment to see him, he was breathing heavily with his eyes shut. to interrupt the silence and discomfort, you decided to speak. "what am i supposed to do now?" you whispered, but it was quite audible. "don't come back in here if you don't want this to happen again." he said in a tired, raw voice. he sounded fine as fuck.
"and what if i want to repeat this moment?" you get away a little from him to have a better view of his face. he barely opened his eyes and let out a chuckle.
"take note.." he started. "next time it will be in your room."
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cuz-reasons · 2 years ago
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I'm almost done 6 day work week from hell oh my god its just today and tmr and it's the easiest and shortest shifts wish me luck
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ohmygraves · 1 year ago
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you and simon were fighting.
it was such a dumb argument too, something that you've forgotten already, but of course he didn't. he got irritated at you and yelled, pointing fingers at you calling you stupid and bringing up all the times you've wronged him. he brought up the time when you got the two of you late for a reservation and costed him both time and money, or the time that you almost burned down the house after you fell asleep cooking something.
you were undoubtedly upset, telling him about how he didn't make you feel happy, how you were alone while he was going away for so long on deployments and you're at home with no means to talk to your husband hoping that he's still alive. or that he didn't even appreciate that you'd drag your ass out of bed when he wants some midnight snack because he's a lousy cook and he only likes your food.
the two of you went back and forth for a while, calling eachother out before simon put his foot down, yelling at you.
"i can't bloody stand you, i shouldn't have married you!"
that got you to shut up.
you looked at him in shock, eyes wide as tears slowly fell from your eyes. your lips quivered as you tried to process what he just said, wondering if he was being serious or not. wondering if he knows how much his words basically stabbed you on the chest.
simon, realizing what he just said, snapped out of his anger. knowing that he had fucked up. he tried to say something, but you quickly retreated back to your shared bedroom, locking it. your tears wouldn't stop and you started bawling, your choked sobs can be heard as he approached the door.
you thought that your marriage was over, seeing that he basically regretted his decision in making you his. he yelled at you without hesitation, making you cry and basically was quiet the whole time. you should probably go back to your parents, start separation, and—
your phone pinged, a message from simon. hesitating to open the text, your fingers trembled as you read it, eyes blurry from tears as you try to quiet your sobs.
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you cried more, unlocking the door as you fling it open, jumping into simon's arms. he whispered lots of apologies, promising to make it up to you, and to never treat you this way again. you cried in his arms, feeling his tender touches on your hair and your back, hands still trembling. you're sure he's bad at this, that he feels awful for what he did (you could tell he was scared because he saw thay he slowly turned to be like his father and it scares him too).
he promised that he didn't mean what he said earlier, and he didn't regret marrying you. he'll do anything to convince you, he hated hearing your sobs and cries.
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animasola86 · 5 months ago
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🐺 A FILLING EXPERIENCE
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knotting!dildo x f!reader 🔥 very explicit 🔥 words: 9.8k
You were a little drunk and very horny when you browsed the website looking for a new sex toy. When your order arrives, however, you feel like you did something very wrong. Or did you? Maybe it'll grow on you? (Not sure that's a good thing, though.) Prepare for a wild ride.
WARNINGS: NSFW! Explicit sexual content! Sex toys! Possessed sex toys. Masturbation. Knotting. Referenced werewolves. Referenced A/B/O dynamics. Possession. Vaginal sex. Breeding. Memory loss. (READ ON AO3!)
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A/N: The prompt was "knotting, masturbation, sex toys". The pairing is what it is. For a reference picture of the star of the show (aka the dildo) check it on AO3! (Also, very surprisingly, but this is not an ad for Bad Dragon, I swear.)
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You spend a whole minute staring at the item you just pulled out of the unassuming box. The sheer size of it both makes your head spin and mouth very, very dry (at the same time, you feel a growing wetness somewhere much lower). Wow. Just wow. What is that thing? You're absolutely sure you ordered it in a different size, the smallest to be exact, so this can't be right.
Licking your lips, you blink, focusing back on the packaging. There isn't anything on the box, but you find a little sheet of paper next to the satin bag it came with. The dimensions listed make you frown. Putting the hefty item back on your desk, you fumble for the ruler you keep in one of the drawers. Then you start measuring the damn thing.
It's almost nine inches long, if you dismiss the large base that holds it steady to any surface. The head is the smallest part, two inches wide and tapered, the shaft flares out then, you measure two and a half inches in width, sloping into a soft curve lined with ridges and little nubs, before the main attraction protrudes in a rather menacing way: the knot, two bulbous bumps, and they even added thick veins to the design. Your hand is shaking when you put the ruler next to it. Three point five six inches wide.
That's a lot. Way too much. This will never fit inside you. Ever.
And still you are intrigued. Of course you are, you ordered that dildo for a reason, even if it came in the wrong size. (You could return it, you know that, but it's been a thrill to order it in the first place, so sending it back seems like too much of a hassle.) But just seeing it now, sitting heavy on your desk, with your small hand resting beside it, with its intricate and strangely realistic textures, it looks too intimidating.
You've read these werewolf stories where some fair maiden stumbles through the forest and ends up getting relentlessly knotted by the monster (or the more modern versions of some alpha male knotting his omega mate to help them through their heat, which always fascinated you a little more because it seemed not as fantastical). The idea to have something big inside you, filling you, stretching you out, and then something even bigger holding you in place, making it impossible to move, gives you chills, in the good way.
You may have been a little drunk and very horny when you ordered this fantasy dildo, but seeing it now, in the “flesh”, makes you very anxious. This was a stupid purchase. It won't be the same anyway. It's just the disembodied dick of a creature that doesn't exist in the first place. You'll be stuffed, sure, but you'll miss the warmth and the strength of whoever this would be attached to.
You sigh. Well, nothing you can do about it. You neither have a boyfriend to test this out with nor do you possess any magical abilities to make that fantasy come true, and as of right now, you don't see yourself using the damn thing anyway. It's too large (your other dildos look downright puny in comparison), and you are too small.
Despite it all, it is mesmerizing you. You chose a deep midnight blue as the color, that blends from a lighter blue at the tip into an almost black at the base, which makes it look slightly slimmer than it is. Slowly you move your hand up and close it around the curved shaft, well, you try, your fingers are too short to reach all the way around. You still slide your palm along the ridges and bumps, feeling the firm smooth silicone. It gives way in some places, you can bend it just a little bit, but when your hand reaches the knot, those bulbs feel almost a little too rigid.
You squeeze them, watching your knuckles blanching, knowing you will never have the same grip with your pussy. Warmth rushes into your cheeks at the thought. Biting your lip, you keep stroking the strange toy, getting a feel for it, trying to imagine how it would fit inside you. With how hefty the base is, you would have to put it on the ground and lower yourself onto it, which sounds like a workout you're not so sure you'd like.
But maybe the base comes off and you can use it like a regular dildo, snuggled into bed, hidden under your blanket? You lift the thing up and try to twist the base, but nothing happens. Hmm. At least it's sturdy. You find a little hole at the bottom, and you remember you ordered it with a... what did they call it, cumtube? Sounds weird, but it's just a long tube you can fill with cum-like lube that shoots out at some point? You're not too clear on the workings of that. But the idea to be filled by something warm and sticky makes your stomach tense up in anticipation.
Shifting on your chair, you inhale sharply and pull your hand away from the dark blue item. Well, this is not going to happen, not now. Maybe never. The idea is nice, but you don't see it being too pleasurable in reality. So you pack it up into its unassuming black satin bag along with the bottle of lube and the long tube it came with, and store it in the lowest drawer of your desk. Out of sight, out of mind.
Or so you hope.
When you go to bed that night, you see the large dildo in your mind's eye, and you recall these smutty stories, you imagine the grunts of the werewolf as he fucks the poor woman beneath him, rutting into her like the feral creature he is. And how she screams when he bottoms out, pressing all those inches into her, forcing his knot to stretch her entrance, how her pussy lips grip around it and pull it further inside. You have your hand between your legs as you try to imagine what it must feel like to be this full, to be bred and filled, with nowhere to go, stuck on those bulging bulbs.
A moan escapes you as your body shudders. You could try it. You have the hardware. It's right there. You just have to get up and get it... But you're too cozy in bed, under your warm blanket, with your fingers rubbing hard circles around your clit. You end up coming to the idea of it, and that's enough for you. Content with your heart racing, you exhale loudly, wiping your wet fingers on your thigh before you snuggle into the bedding and close your eyes, falling into a dreamless sleep.
Maybe not as dreamless as you've hoped. You wake up the next morning with a dry throat and sticky thighs, your mind swimming with images of cocks plunging into squelching holes, of being held down and ravaged, and you shudder at the memory. Blinking your eyes into focus, you sit up – and freeze.
There, on top of your desk, sits the large dark blue dildo, shining in the sunlight filtering through your window. No way. You've put it into the drawer, into its bag, far away, and even though you thought about using it last night, you didn't. And even if, you wouldn't put it back on the desk like that, right? But it's there, almost mocking you. Slowly you stand up and walk towards your desk, reaching out a hand to touch the smooth surface.
It's sticky, almost warm to the touch. What the hell? But you haven't used it, you're sure, you'd certainly remember it, wouldn't you? Shaking your head, you dismiss it for the moment and start your morning routine as if nothing happened.
Before you leave for the day, you grab the dildo and the toy cleaner you keep in your bedside table and give it a good scrub. Then you hide it away again, shutting the drawer with a firm thud. You are tempted to put a lock on it, but that's just silly.
Later that evening, you sit in bed and scroll through the stories on your phone, mindlessly skimming through your preferred genres. Somehow you end up on another knotting story. What are the odds. This one is set in the omegaverse, depicting an alpha bodyguard taking care of the omega girl in his care... by knotting her senseless. Just your kind of story. You end up with your fingers in your cunt, rubbing and poking desperately as you read.
You're close, your thighs twitching with every brush against your sensitive clit, stomach tense, feet curling into the sheets as you pump your hips. Your breaths are frantic, heart thundering inside your chest. Soundless, strangled gasps escape you (you're always mindful of your noises, these walls are thin and you don't want to alarm or entertain your neighbors) and you squirm and writhe, your phone falling out of your hand when you have to clutch at the edge of the bed.
“Fuck,” you croak out quietly while you roll onto your side and press your thighs together, trapping your hand, fingers stilling inside your clenching pussy as your body convulses under the mind-numbing throes of your orgasm.
You lie there for a moment, taking deep gulps of air into your burning lungs, slowly calming down again. Through the dark room you look towards your desk. And you can see it, your new toy, hidden away, waiting, and before you know it, you stumble off the bed and rip the drawer open and the large dildo out of its bag. You don't even care about the lube at this point.
With your back pressed into the bed, you rub the tapered tip between your wet folds, gathering your slick. You need both hands to guide the big thing back and forth, it's quite heavy. With your heart racing and your stomach fluttering, you angle your hips, feet pressed into the bed, and then you push. The head parts your lips and sinks into your entrance, and it's already a stretch that makes you inhale sharply.
But you keep going, your arms shaking under the exertion of forcing the toy deeper. You feel its protruding ridges and nubs rubbing against your soft walls as you start moving it in and out slowly. There's still so much of it in your hands, but the curve of the thing already presses between your tight muscles. You turn it slightly, figuring out which way feels best, and in doing so drill it even further.
You stop before your pussy lips brush against the bulbous knot, and you hold it tightly when you let the thing just rest inside you for a moment, feeling its girth and length and weight, its textures and shape. Clenching around the toy, you try to relax on the bed, grinding your hips slowly against your hands. It feels amazing, those ridges and nubs seem to hit all the right spots. Little moans slip from your parted lips, mouth hanging open as you squeeze your eyes shut.
The base is heavy between your fingers, and you feel them cramping slightly as you continue to move the large dildo in and out, considering using it like it's intended to be used: standing upright on the ground as you impale yourself on it. But it's a daunting thought, and your legs are already shaking badly. You doubt you have enough strength left to do squats on it now.
So you keep pumping half of it into your tight cunt, both hands closed around the hefty base, hips meeting your thrusts, the wet squelching sounds echoing through your room, adding to the growing arousal inside you. Your wrists hurt under the strain, but you're desperate now, hectic whines escaping you as you double your efforts, pushing and pulling, ramming that damn thing into you as fast as you can.
Arching your back and lifting your hips off the bed, you lean into the impending release, so close, a few more nudges, come on – when a sudden cold breeze over your sweaty face alerts you to something you cannot stop. It's as if an unseen force pushes the dildo with you, stronger than your own hands, an assist you didn't ask for.
But you're too far gone, gasping with your mouth wide open, head pressed into your pillow, thighs twitching, the tension ready to explode, and then it does, and at the same time as your orgasm crashes over you, a strange jerk goes through your body, and your usually voiceless cry becomes a real one, an almost scream as you feel your clenching cunt being stretched. Your hands fall away from the toy in an attempt to let it pop out and relish in the empty feeling as your contractions shake your body, but there's no empty feeling, because you're not empty.
You're stuffed. Somehow the knot has made it into your tight channel and your pussy lips grip the shaft beneath it, and as much as you push and clench, it doesn't budge. Cold panic rips you from your post-orgasmic bliss. Your hands claw at the base sticking out of you as you gyrate your hips, feeling every ridge and nub and bump pressing hard into your fluttering walls, but the toy is lodged within you. How did that happen?
Breathing harder, both from the exertion and the anxiety of having a sex toy stuck in your cunt, you wail quietly, rolling onto your side, lifting your leg, pulling on the damn thing. No chance. It's in there now. Knot and all, and the more you squirm, the more you feel the tapered tip pressing into depths nothing has ever pressed into before. It's a strange pain, sharp and piercing, a jolt of electricity with every movement of your body.
You lie on your back now, legs still angled, thighs twitching, trying to calm yourself down. You need to relax your muscles to get it out, you know that, but it's hard, as hard as the toy inside you. And somehow you feel it... expanding? No, that must be your imagination. It's not one of those inflatable things, you made sure of that. But the stretch is there, and it hurts.
Your hands are back between your legs, gripping the hefty base, but in your attempt to rip it out somehow, you suddenly feel it loosening and with another surprised/pained gasp, you realize you're holding the base of the toy – but without the toy.
“No!” you wail louder, staring at the dark piece of silicone between your fingers. It came right off, not as sturdy as initially suspected after all. You throw it aside and finger at the now-base of the fake shaft. It's barely sticking out now, your cunt eager to swallow it whole it seems. Whining in panic, you try to hook a finger between your tightly stretched skin and the dildo, but there's no way you can grip it like this.
Tears prick at the corners of your eyes as your anxiety grows. Chill. Calm down, it'll pop out on its own, they always do, don't worry, you try to soothe yourself. Not the first time you accidentally pushed a toy in too deep, but those were smooth ones, half as long and half as thick, with no ridges or knots, of course they'd slip out again. But this thing? It's a fucking knot, designed, by nature, to keep itself lodged inside any unsuspecting hole.
You think back to those stories you read about the topic. Those were fictional though, and every author handled it slightly differently. In some of them, the knot would just deflate when the man (or werewolf) was done dumping his potent load into his victim or mate, in others it stayed bulbous and inflated for a long time, locking the two people together, which, in a way, is a romantic thing and something you'd like to experience once in your life as well, but there's nobody attached to the dildo in your cunt, no one to hold you, to calm you, to rub your back and ease you through the pain of stretching and being filled.
The thought makes you sad, and in your frustration you buck your hips, only to gasp when the motion causes the toy to rub against these very sensitive spots that make your toes curl. You move your pelvis again, ripping a quiet moan from your throat, and then you fall into a slow rhythm of undulating into the bed, one hand back on your mound, feeling the tight fit of the toy before you start rubbing your swollen clit gently.
Before you know it, you work yourself to yet another orgasm, and the dildo seems to work with you. You even nudge its base a little, pushing it deeper, right against that sweet spot in the far back, and you groan at the sensation of pleasure/pain as you thrash your head into the pillow. Rolling onto your side, you keep grinding against the heavy thing inside you, panting under the exertion, your body curled up tightly, just like the coil in your tense stomach.
You're teetering on the edge, head empty except for that delicious cotton that makes you forget everything. It feels so good. The stretch, the pressure, the snug fit, those ridges and nubs and those seemingly pulsing bulbs pressing right against your g-spot. Mewls and wails fall from your trembling lips, and in your haze, you end up on your stomach where you lift your hips up and start humping your mattress feverishly.
The additional stimulation to your clit makes you cry out loudly, and you can only muffle your noises by pressing your face into the pillow. Your hard nipples rub against the fabric of your shirt with every gyrating motion with how you scrape your chest over the bed, and it doesn't take long before you stumble right over the edge, your muscles clenching hard around the toy, squeezing with all they have, as a million bright lights explode around you.
You're too far gone to think at that point, but if you would have been able to, you'd wonder why the toy doesn't come shooting out of your convulsing channel like most other toys would. It's not just the knot holding it in place, there's a strange force keeping your hips up and the dildo inside you. But you notice none of it, not the stiff position of your body as you tremble and quake, hands clawing at the sheets, knuckles white, fingers hurting, you just keep riding the waves of pleasure crashing over you.
You do, however, feel a familiar warmth gathering deep inside you, and you assume it's your own release waiting to gush past the item if it weren't for the knot plugging you up like a cork. Though it feels a little different, not something your body produced due to high stimulation, but something being added...
You groan deeply when your body makes a forward jerk as you feel the toy moving within you. Which shouldn't be possible. It's almost as if it's pulsing, throbbing, twitching, and with those motions something hot pushes into you, filling you up, seeping into every nook and cranny left by the large toy invading your already tight space. You shudder deeply, wondering in your fucked-out state what's going on, before you feel a strange stretch, a pressure building up inside you, and then, like an airlock being lifted, a strange squelching sound appears and you feel something hot and sticky trickling down your leg.
Remaining in your bent-over position, you move a hand between your legs and feel for whatever is leaking out of you. It's thick, thicker than your own juices, and much stickier. You bring it to your eyes, and whatever liquid it is, it pulls into thin strands as you part your fingers. Feels like cum. You blink at the sight and feel of it, and in your stupor, you roll onto your side, feeling more of it gathering between your legs.
When you're on your back again, you lift your hips, your sticky hand rubbing over your bare stomach, trying to ignore how tense and full it feels, down to your mound, teasing at the stretched opening. You feel the silicone against your fingertips, and it's no longer an intruder you want to get out immediately, it's become a strangely comforting feeling, despite the out of nowhere appearing cum-like substance. Maybe you filled it up before you used it? You can't remember, honestly. Does it matter? Not really.
You enjoy the feeling of fullness, the stretch and pressure, how with every slight movement the toy's ridges dig into your soft walls. The curve of it fits perfectly inside you, and the bulbous knot makes it sit so snug, as if it was made specifically for your cunt. You almost laugh at your initial apprehension and how you thought that huge thing would never fit into your tiny body, but look at you now, stuffed and happy.
With one hand on your mound, now eager to keep the toy in, as you rub your swollen labia gently, you roll onto your side and snuggle into your bed, your other hand pulling the sheets over your sweat-slick, sticky body. You don't care about washing up, you just want to sleep, softly riding out the blissful tremors of what this amazing toy has made you feel.
Closing your eyes, you imagine lying next to your alpha mate, or even a fluffy werewolf, as he holds you tightly pressed to his warm body, cock stuck inside your clenching cunt, knotting you to your (and his) heart's content.
But despite feeling exhausted, you can't stop grinding your hips against your hand, breathing harder when the warmth and tension builds up all over again as the dildo presses into all the right places. Soft moans slip from your dry lips, a shudder crashing through you at the feel of the tight knot stretching your sensitive skin. That last orgasm before you actually fall asleep is a mild one, a soothing thing washing over you, a warm embrace from something that isn't there.
You wake up with a sigh, feeling refreshed and rejuvenated, ready to start the new day. There is a strange soreness between your legs, as well as a very sticky sensation on your skin, but you don't care much for it – before you sit up and yelp when a sudden pain crashes through you. You stand up so fast your head is spinning, and as you press a hand to your mound, you can feel that the dildo is still lodged snugly inside you.
Yet you don't even have time to panic as the room grows dark all of a sudden. Then it all happens very fast. Somehow you are being turned and bent over the foot of the bed, chest pressed into the mattress by a force you can't explain. Your hands grip for the sheets as you struggle against whatever is holding you down. Are you still dreaming? You can't be sure. It feels too real.
And the pain when something pulls at the dildo in your cunt, when the knot stretches your pussy lips as it forces its way past them, is very, very real and makes you wail into the bedding. After the first stretch, the rest of the toy slips out easily, and with it comes a flood of something warm and sticky, spraying against your inner thighs, dripping down your legs, pooling around your bare feet on the floor. You gasp at the sudden emptiness.
All that wasted seed, you think as if someone has planted the thought into your head. Better put in a new load. Before you can properly wonder about where those words came from, you feel something nudging against your stretched entrance. You stand on shaking legs, ass in the air, torso pushed down into the bed, and you struggle, or try to, but you can't move. It's as if you're frozen in time and place, held down by an invisible force.
It's too dark to see anything, not that you could anyway with how your face is buried in the sheets. All you can do is take it, and even that you're not sure you can. It feels like something is standing behind you, something cold that lets goosebumps ripple over your exposed skin, and at the same time there's something very hot sinking into your fluttering cunt. You know it's the silicone toy warmed by your own body, but it feels different somehow. It feels... real.
You grunt with every sharp stab it gives you, parting your folds, plunging deep, but not as deep, teasing you with those ridges and nubs that scrape over your gummy walls, and the swell of that knot nudges against your entrance, never breaching it. Not yet anyway. The pace is brutal, a feral rutting, pistoning in and out fast and hard, and you can barely contain your noises anymore. They're muffled but still loud in your ears. Maybe because they're the only thing you hear, aside from the wet squelching of your cunt.
Whatever is pushing that dildo into you, whatever took over for you, doesn't make a sound, but you can feel it, you know it's there, holding you down and restrained. Whatever it is.
As sure as you are about the invisible force fucking you on your own bed, you are about the impending orgasm creeping closer with every hard thrust. The constant in and out of the rigid toy makes your head spin, your stomach tense, your thighs tremble. You're moaning and mewling, desperate for release as the warmth gathers in your core, ready to burst free. You even manage to press your hips back and meet the motions of the toy pounding into you.
And then you come, wailing loudly, barely restrained, lights exploding behind your eyelids as your body shudders and convulses, and you feel something wet splattering on the wooden floor, adding to the mess pooling around your feet. You've never squirted before, but you just know that's what happened, if you could analyze the moment, which you can't because your head is deliciously empty as you let bliss take over your thinking apparatus.
You barely register how the toy keeps plunging into your wet cunt, those squelching noises obscene if you would care about them, and as you still float on that amazing high, you feel its thrusts getting slower, slightly deeper, more deliberate, those bulging bulbs nudging firmer against your pussy lips, and suddenly the pressure grows stronger, making you gasp and your legs shake badly, and you fight it, stiffen, muscles tensing up, making it all the worse, but whatever controls the large dildo doesn't care as it pushes it further into your protesting cunt.
You let out a deep groan when it finally breaches the tight squeeze, stretching your sensitive skin, slipping into you, and that motion, the getting swallowed by your own body, turns your wails of distress into cries of pure pleasure as you come again around the invading object, your walls fluttering around the knot. You almost lose your footing, but the force that's penetrating you is still holding you up, no matter how badly your body spasms against the bed.
The dildo is back inside of you, all of it, from the tapered tip that teases at your cervix to the swollen protrusions to the bit of shaft after that. Your cunt clenches around all of it, holding it in place, hugging it to its contracting walls, letting it rub against all those special spots. And you keep shaking, so sensitive by now the slightest motion causes you to gasp and shudder. You'd be content like this, having it inside you, just resting, as heavy and large as it is, but whatever decided to take over, doesn't see it that way.
While you couldn't possibly push the thing deeper the last time it was wedged into you, you now feel it moving, nudging further, the hard tip pressing into your depths, stretching you in a way you've never been stretched before. It hurts, but it also feels good. And it's good that you think so, as you don't have a choice in the matter anyway.
The toy is pushed and pulled in slow fluid motions, and you feel the knot pressing hard against your entrance, stretching but never leaving your cunt. That doesn't stop the force behind you, though. The shallow thrusts continue until they turn into a desperate rutting, quick short stabs that make you howl as they bully both your deepest spot and the tight muscles of your hole. It's painful in the best way possible, and you feel your legs trembling, your stomach tensing, that warmth filling you up before it all explodes, catapulting you over the edge all over again.
You scream as you come, luckily muffled by how your face is still pressed into the bedding, but the sensation isn't any less extreme. Your orgasm crashes over you like the biggest tidal wave you've ever experienced, not that you have seen any of those before, but it sure feels like it hits you straight in the chest and drags you along, throwing you around, unrelenting, merciless, as you're being pushed and pulled and gasping for air.
Your walls clench hard around the still pistoning intruder, the curve, the ridges, the nubs, that fucking knot, all playing vital roles in keeping you afloat (or drowning), prolonging the gloriously mind-blowing experience. You feel dizzy, your heart thundering in your chest, lungs burning, body arching and spasming, as you are being hurdled from one orgasm to the next, or so it feels, and it never ends, not even when the toy suddenly stills, pushed as deep as possible, and then it throbs.
Even though you're barely able to feel anything anymore, you can feel its vibrations, the thrum from deep within it, and it shouldn't do that, it's not a vibrating toy, you tell yourself, it's also not an inflating one, but it still seems to swell, or the knot is, and it's pulsing against your tense muscles, stretching them, working inside you, and then... it unloads.
The warmth it fills you with is scorching, so filling you feel it bulging your stomach, which shouldn't be possible, and you may even taste it on your tongue as you gulp for air. It's all around you, but mostly inside you, and there it stays because the knot keeps it from spilling out. You are plugged shut, and it keeps pumping, giving you more, and it feels both oddly comforting and terrifyingly too much. You feel like bursting, so full, way too full, but all you can do is groan quietly.
With your mind still reeling, you are suddenly moved, lifted up by invisible hands (or paws?), cradled against something strangely warm as you're being put onto your side on the bed, your stomach fluttering and bulging, tensing badly under the onslaught of whatever liquid is pumped into your depths. The knotting dildo remains deep inside you, stuck and locked in, and you become drowsy, exhausted from whatever just happened. The darkness is still all around you, but you feel warm and content and taken good care of.
A smile grazes your dry lips as you imagine lying in the embrace of a mate, a lover, holding you after the strenuous ordeal of being knotted and bred, as their cock keeps pumping cum into you, as you remain tied together. And it feels so real...
Your eyes flutter close, and you inhale deeply, shifting slightly with your precious cargo inside you. As you drift into unconsciousness, the room grows brighter again, letting in the warm sunlight of a day already reaching its halfway point. Of course, you notice none of that, gone as you are.
When you stir awake, the darkness is back, this one real, lying like a heavy blanket all around you, while you lie on your side, shivering because you seemed to have kicked off your own blanket. Once you come to fully, you feel a little strange. Your mind is fuzzy, laden with images that couldn't have happened. Did you dream all that? Surely. It would be too weird if not.
But then why do you feel full when at the same time you are blatantly empty? Rolling onto your back, you grind your hips, assessing if you were indeed knotted and bred, but there's nothing. Your stomach rumbles, and when you touch it, it's normal, not bulged and tense but soft, and that's probably where the emptiness comes from. You're hungry, but that hunger also feels like an air pocket inside you, too big to ignore, giving you the feeling of being full? It's a strange sensation, to say the least.
And then there's another kind of emptiness. The one sitting invisibly in your aching little cunt disguised as nothingness. The toy is gone. You recall vividly how deep it's been in you, how stuck and immobile and heavy it sat between your clenching walls, but now they are fluttering around nothing. Where did it go?
You sit up, rubbing your naked arms, realizing you are indeed completely naked. Strange, didn't you go to bed with your sleep shirt? And why is it dark? It's been morning before, what happened to the rest of the day? You lean over to the lamp on your bedside table and the dark room is suddenly bathed in a warm yellow light, causing your eyes to wander straight towards your desk.
And there it is, sitting on its hefty base, the dark blue knotting dildo, in all its glory, with its curve, those ridges and nubs, and the formidable two bulbs making up the knot of the thing. You blink at the sight, confusion washing over you like a cold shiver. Slowly you stand up, groaning as you do, feeling your limbs shaking. Why are you so weak? Rubbing your stomach, you take a few steps before you almost slip on the floor.
Something wet coats the soles of your feet, and when you look down there's a big puddle of something shiny all over the wooden boards. Some of it is clear, but there's also a white shimmer to it, and you feel your heart accelerating as you remember how that came to be (even if the memory is faint, but seeing the evidence makes it all the more real and that frighteningly so). The feeling of being filled to the brim and leaking with the rest of it, the sensation of coming so hard you squirted all over the floor, while a strange force pounded your new toy into your willing body. Has it really happened? Apparently. But how is that possible?
Your heart beats faster as you keep walking until you reach the large dildo, standing proud and tall and girthy. You reach out with a shaking hand, carefully sliding your fingers over the textured shaft, tracing the thick veins on it. It feels warm and sticky, and it makes your blood run cold. It feels real, and it shouldn't. You know that. You're not crazy.
But there are too many things you just can't explain. How did it get back on the desk, back on the base you seemingly broke off last time? How was it possible that the toy fucked you on its own, in that bent-over position, and why weren't you able to move as it happened?
You feel chills all over your naked body. In that moment your rational mind just gives up. Normally you don't believe in ghosts or anything supernatural, but how else could you explain any of this? Is the toy haunted? Possessed?
It's a silicone thing, man-made, fabricated to cater to certain people's needs, a fantasy product, but it feels real, it pumped seemingly real cum into you (or so you think, it could still have been loaded with that artificial stuff without your knowledge and by squeezing it too hard you made it come out?), it fucked you as if attached to the real deal (whatever the real deal was).
Staring at the item, you lick your lips, eyes scanning every inch of its ridged surface. As creepy as this whole situation is, you still can't deny how good it felt also. How full and happy you were, how many times you came as it rammed into you, how those little nubs felt against your tense walls. They clench just remembering it. And somehow, from the darkest corner of your mind, comes the need to put it back in, feel it again, let the knot lock you up...
A shaky sigh escapes you, and you force yourself to look away from its tantalizing appeal. No. You can't. It'll all happen again, a mind-blowing fuckfest, and you'll waste another day in bed or wherever this thing wants to fuck you, or you it, it's still unclear how that happened, and maybe it was just your extremely horny mind who made up the idea of it being controlled by somebody else, maybe it has been you all along, driven crazy by sheer lust as you rammed that knot into your own cunt.
Shaking your head to clear it, you step away and into the bathroom. You spend a long time in there, inspecting and washing and handling your sore body, and when you emerge again, wrapped in a towel with your wet hair falling over your shoulders, the toy is still sitting on your desk. You watch it, but don't approach it. Instead you leave the room and venture into the kitchen to satiate the human need of eating, and after you sat at the counter and shoveled a bowl of cereal into your achingly empty stomach, you return to your bedroom.
The sight of that thing haunts you. You feel antsy just looking at it. In the end, you pick it up and put it down on the wooden desk chair, something you feel like doing, as if something put that thought into your head, a not too unfamiliar sensation. Then you pull the chair back, drop your towel and move to sit down on it. Again, you're barely thinking about it, it's like a need, an urge, a thing that feels right.
So you squat down on the toy, feeling the tapered tip pressing between your folds, and as soon as it breaches your entrance, pushing against your sore muscles, you gasp, hands curled around the edge of the desk to ground yourself as you let gravity do the rest. Or most of it. You feel the curve sinking into your tight depths, carving a way into your gummy walls, but when the knot presses against your pussy lips, you pause, breathing harder.
It feels too big, but you know it can fit inside you, it's happened before. Inhaling deeply, you try to relax, gyrating your hips to ease it into you, but your hole's too tight, unwilling to part further. You're in that weird half-squat, hovering over the chair, arms propped on the desk in front of you, and instead of giving up, you start moving up and down, fucking yourself slowly on the curved shaft, feeling those ridges and nubs and the tip poking at those delicious spots.
You're panting from the exertion, thighs burning under the strain, but you keep going even when sweat drops down your brows. You feel as if your muscles are opening up, and before your legs give in, you slam your hips down. A shrill shriek escapes you as you feel the knot stretching you open, your sensitive skin and muscles giving way, allowing it inside before they close back around it, swallowing it and the whole thing inside of you. You moan when you feel it filling you out.
Sinking a few inches further, you feel your rear pressing against the base of the toy before you sit down fully, ass cheeks on the chair, the entirety of the dildo wedged between your tight walls. A trembling exhale escapes you as you try to relax on it, your arms shaking before you bring your hands to your lap, your chest rising and falling faster, your stomach fluttering. For a few minutes you just sit there, trying to calm your frantic breaths and your rapid heartbeat, adjusting to the filling sensation.
And then, as if you haven't just impaled yourself on a knotting dildo, you reach a hand out, turn the lamp on your desk on and pull the laptop closer that you keep at the edge of it. You've missed an entire day it seems, so you're hellbent on making up for it. As your fingers fly over the keyboard, you occasionally grind your hips into the chair, relishing in the sudden jolts of pleasure/pain as the toy nudges your insides.
You sit there and work until you've edged yourself so badly, you can barely think anymore. Leaning back in your chair with your hands flat on your desk, you inhale sharply, tilting your head back as you undulate against the toy wedged between your thighs. You're so sensitive, every single motion causes you to shiver deeply. Even the hefty base of the toy rubs delightfully against your mound, adding pressure where you didn't know you needed it. A moan escapes you, and you move your hands to your rear and pull your cheeks apart until you can grind against it better.
It feels so good. To be stuffed, to be teased like this, to feel all those little details on that firm silicone shaft. You want to congratulate whoever came up with this design. It's perfect.
In an attempt to feel more of it, you lift yourself up slightly, really wanting to ride that thing now, but of course the knot prevents you from doing so, plugging you up tightly. You can still nudge the curved dildo a little deeper, so you end up humping your chair with small shallow snaps of your hips, your thighs trembling after only a few minutes, your panting breaths loud in the quiet room.
With a little whine you stand up properly, but instead of forcing the toy out from between your clenching walls, you lift up the entire thing, base and all, as it's firmly stuck inside of you. Its weight is heavy between your legs, but you still manage to stumble towards the bed with it where you throw yourself onto your back, spread your legs, lift your hips and start pushing your hands against the base, working yourself up even more.
Once your wrists cramp up under the strain, you focus on stimulating your clit, and the first touch has you already writhing on the bed. Gasping quietly, you buck your hips against your own fingers as you keep rubbing that sensitive bundle of nerves until your thighs spasm wildly. You feel the tension building, the warmth gathering inside you, and then you come with a soundless half-scream, mouth wide open, legs clamping shut around your hands as you ride out the waves of pleasure, the toy practically vibrating inside you with how your walls are fluttering around it.
Your limbs go limp then, hands falling away, legs falling open, as you try to catch your breath. Eyes closed, a stupid smile on your lips, you lie there like a stranded beetle, stomach convulsing, chest heaving. You don't notice how the darkness creeps back in, dimming out the warm light of the desk and bedside table lamp. You don't feel the cold wafting in the air around you, but you do feel the dildo moving, tiny movements, little nudges against your tight muscles until it pops out with an obscenely wet squelching sound, coaxing a deep sigh out of you.
You feel utterly relieved and satisfied and content, ready to fall asleep like that, with your legs wide open, presented on the bed like a strange little offering, and whatever lurks in the shadows around you, seems to take the bait.
It feels like your bed is moving, the mattress denting on either side of your hips, and then you're being lifted a little, and it's cold and warm at the same time as your legs are pushed up and against your chest, and as if you want this to happen, your hands move to grab your thighs, holding your legs like this. In this position you are wide open, a cool breeze on your swollen clit, your cunt clenching around nothing – but not for long.
The tapered tip pushes between your folds, eagerly sinking into your slightly stretched hole, scraping along your soft walls. The curved shaft follows, digging into you, its nubs and ridges rubbing against those sensitive spots that make you mewl softly. You are in a trance, held by lust even as exhaustion wants to pull you under. You don't question anything at this point, you just savor the sensations.
And you feel everything. The shaft moves then, in and out, shallow little stabs, carving its way deeper until you feel the bulbous knot pressing against your entrance. But it doesn't go in yet, it keeps slamming against your puffy lips, the wet squelching sounds a telltale sign of how aroused you still are. There's a strange weight to the thrusts, as if there would be more than just the toy being pushed into you, it feels as if it was attached to something much bigger, a presence you can't see (not even if you would open your eyes), but can sense in a way that feeds your longing.
The pounding continues, and that warmth builds up again, all around the thick shaft that moves between your tight walls with ease and power, in and out, fast and hard, and in an angle that makes you wail, bullying all the right spots until you can't hold it in you anymore. You come with a croaked cry as your body tenses up before it explodes into nothing but bliss, tiny lights dancing behind your eyelids, that soft warmth turning into a burning that devours all of you at once.
Through your orgasm the fake cock (or so you think) keeps pumping into you, those wet squelches are obscenely loud, and you moan and whine, hips bucking to meet the thrusts as your fingers dig into your own thighs, holding your legs squished against your breasts, your feet jumping above your head with every plunge.
And then it happens, your fluttering cunt gives way to the knot, but instead of plugging you up, it pops out, then plunges into you once more, and out again and in again, and you wail under the stretch and strange sensation of being stretched repeatedly. There's pain, but there's also blinding pleasure whenever it forces itself into you, and you keep coming from that motion alone, gasping and writhing, barely able to breathe or think or do anything but let it happen.
Now the whole length of the thing pushes into you, as deep as it'll go, bullying your cervix with its tapered tip, knot fully swallowed by your walls, then it's pulled back almost entirely before doing it all over again, driving you to the edge and over it and back and over in rapid succession. It's all a blur, but it feels so good, you could die on the spot just feeling it breaching your tight space over and over again.
Luckily, you don't die, you are just pushed from orgasm to orgasm, until every single nerve ending is buzzing and tingling, and you come to the point where you don't want to come any more. Not that the thing fucking you seems to mind that very much. It keeps going, in and out, your cunt giving off a lewd wet popping sound every time the knot is forced out and another wet slurping sound every time it's pushed in and swallowed by your walls. Along with your breathless whines and the squeaking of the bed, it's a cacophony of sounds driving you to the edge of sanity, and pleasure, and pain, and all of the above.
You feel yourself fading, teetering on the brink of unconsciousness, but just as you think you'll drift off now, the thing in your cunt plunges particularly deep, a final thrust full of power and strength, a heavy weight pressing you down as it prods painfully against your already battered cervix. You cry out, your body too confused, so it makes you convulse all over again as another orgasm crashes through you. The curved shaft stills inside you, ridges and nubs and its knot settling against your fluttering walls, and you feel as if it's throbbing and twitching, and the bulbs seem to grow, stretching you further, really plugging you up now.
A groan slips from your dry lips as it starts pumping something warm and filling into your cramped depths. Spurt after spurt, more and more, until you can feel your stomach bulging, tensing under the growing load, and your head is spinning as your body comes down from that strenuous but still utterly pleasurable experience. You feel a little drunk almost, dizzy and disorientated, wondering why you are still holding your legs up. But you stay like this, submitting to whatever leans over you, holding you down with their cock.
The last bit of your rational mind tells you you're just dreaming. Of course you are. And what a nice dream it is, hm? But then your eyes flutter open, and you blink at the darkness around you. It feels impenetrable, too dark. Even at night, you can usually make out the shape of your furniture, the outline of your windows, the streetlamps trying to push their light past your curtains. But you can see absolutely nothing. Did you even open your eyes?
You blink. Yeah, you did. There's something eerie in the way you're staring into the black void in front of you, it gives you chills, makes your body shudder, and as you jerk a little, you feel the weight and the pressure inside of you. The toy. It's still in there, buried deep, and it keeps throbbing, spewing liquid warmth into you. It feels so real. Your heart beats faster, your breaths quicken.
Then a strange hum fills the air, you freeze immediately, your eyes widening. It's a soothing sound as much as it is terrifying. It makes you stiffen, frozen in place, a deep chill running down your spine. And then there's this huff, like an exhale, and you can feel warm air wafting towards you, hitting your sweat-slick face. A tiny little croak escapes you as fear grips your limbs after all.
There is something, holding you down, impaling you on its cock, leaning over you, breathing right against your quivering lips. You can't see it, no matter how hard you try, but it's there. Huffing and puffing in a low, deep rumble, an unseen weight resting between your legs. Hot tears fall from under your lashes, running down your cheeks, but they never reach the pillow beneath your head.
It's a warm sensation, wet, almost a little slimy, and it feels like a tongue lapping at your skin, and the thought alone pushes you right to the edge of hysteria. Helpless whimpers escape you, but that disembodied, unseen tongue keeps licking up the tears continuously spilling from your eyes. Warm breaths dry your wet cheeks, those little huffs quieter now, calm and collected, and they slowly ease your own breathing as you stare ahead at nothing but blackness.
A little shriek is coaxed out of your throat when you feel the same tongue on your neck now, something soft nudging your calves until you let go of your legs and let them fall open against whatever has settled between them. They don't reach the soft bedding beneath but are held up now by something else, and you're too far gone to question it anymore. With your legs down, your torso is exposed to the shadows, your breasts trembling as your chest rises and falls quicker.
Those warm huffs of air hit your sensitive nipples before something warm circles them, and you can feel them being pulled and teased, making you shiver deeply, the sensation sending jolts of pleasure straight to your clit and fluttering cunt. The thick shaft inside you throbs as well, still leaking the occasional spurt of warm fluid. The knot is pulsing, tight and harder than before, or so it feels, those bulging veins on it rubbing deliciously against your stretched flesh.
You feel yourself drifting again under all these ministrations, lulled into your own darkness.
In your dreams, or whatever reality you find yourself in, you see a large shadow leaning over you. And you are calm about it, not afraid, but content. The appearance of the figure above you is hazy, like black smoke, fraying at its edges, no clear contour to make out. But what you can see (or think to see) are strong arms, a broad torso, muscles wherever you look. A display of strength and power and dominance, and in its shadow, you feel safe, protected.
You assume it's a large man, but you can't see his face. It's still too dark. But you can feel his breath on your skin, his lips trailing around your breasts, upwards to your collarbones, before you feel that warm tongue against your neck again. You tilt your head, giving him better access, and he hums deeply, showering you with little kisses and broad strokes of his tongue. Your pulse is fluttering against his mouth, and he senses your arousal, smells it. He seems to sniff you, hovering over you, warm and heavy.
“You are mine now,” you hear a low thrum in the air, assuming it's his voice. “My mate.”
You don't know what that means, but you're ready. You want it. And as if he can feel your approval, he leans in, his lips closing around your pulse, sucking softly, his teeth nibbling carefully, before you feel a different sensation. A pinch, a prick, a sudden cold stab when something sharp sinks into your skin.
You moan quietly as a strange warmth rushes through you (and out of you), the smell of metal wafting towards your nostrils, but you keep still, and without knowing what's happening, you let him bite you, mark you, and he grunts against you, holding your neck between his teeth as a shudder crashes through his big body that travels all the way to his cock buried deep inside of you. You feel it throbbing, the knot pulsing, and as your walls clench in response, you feel more warmth seeping into you as he fills you up again.
His hips grind against yours, soft little nudges, and you feel so good. An unusually gentle orgasm washes over you then, like a calming caress through your body that soothes you, eases your sore muscles, the slight pain in your neck, any other ailments you might have had. None of it matters anymore. You've found your mate. You're not alone anymore. You feel like coming home. Safe...
“What's your name?” you breathe out into the black void ready to consume you, not sure why you feel the need to ask this.
A huff of warm air moves over your face before a low hum vibrates in your ear. “Fenrir,” he growls quietly, and it's all you need to know as you inhale deeply, a soft smile grazing your lips.
Then, the darkness closes around you as if someone puts their hand over your eyes, whisking you away to sleep, or back to reality...
The next time you wake up, you are cuddled into your sheets, and the sunlight filters through your curtains. A new day, and you've never felt this refreshed before. Sitting up, you stretch with a soft squeak, rolling your neck, inhaling deeply. Your eyes move through the room, and the sight of the large dildo on your desk doesn't even confuse you anymore. It feels right to see it there. You stand up and walk past it on your way to the bathroom, your fingers sliding gently along its curved shaft.
In the midst of your morning routine, you hear the chime of your doorbell. Slipping into your fuzzy bathrobe, you hurry to the door, but when you reach it, whoever was there, is already gone. Though they left something behind. You bend down to pick up the small package, seeing your address on it and the usual postal stamps. Delivery? But you didn't expect anything.
You close the door and bring the unassuming box to your desk, putting it down next to the big toy on its base. Humming to yourself, mindlessly scratching at a spot on your neck, you open the package – and frown when you see its contents. Slowly you raise it out of its black satin bag. It's the dildo you ordered. The right size also. It's so small, barely as long as your hand, maybe the size of a soda can but much thinner, less than half the size of the toy that sits next to the opened box.
It's got the same design, the same ridges and nubs and the protruding bulbs of the knot, but it's so... tiny. You really ordered this? Apparently so, as you check the accompanying receipt and instructions. You can only half-remember that horny night when you browsed the site, and intimidated as you were, you chose the smallest size: Mini. You had no idea it would be this small. There's a picture of the different available sizes, and you realize the thing you actually fit into your cunt is the Large one. And just how large it is...
You shiver just thinking of having it inside you. But you also can't wait to put it back in. Your mind is hazy with memories of using it, of what really happened since you got it (and somehow you don't even wonder why you received two packages), and it's all a blur of ecstasy that makes you salivate and drip into the panties you put on.
Yet when you notice that the article has a name, you pause, blinking in confusion, your hand still scratching at what feels like a scabby wound on your neck. The name of the dildo feels familiar, like a distant memory, and it is –
As soon as you say it out loud, the big dark blue toy starts humming, its vibrations (even though you're not connected to it) sending shock waves through your whole body, activating all the right nerves. Your heart beats faster, your breaths turn into soft moans, and your cunt clenches hungrily around nothing.
“Fenrir.”
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MASTERLIST // AO3 // ORIGINAL WORKS
KINKTOBER 2024 MASTERLIST
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solarhysm · 3 months ago
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DUST OF US - 01
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> synopsis: 7 years ago Y/N broke Jungkook’s heart when she decided to end their relationship without an explanation. When they meet again at a friend's wedding, after almost a decade, Jungkook needs answers to move on.
> pairing: Jungkook x reader
> genre: romance, ex to lovers au
> warnings: explicit languages, violence, smut, cheating, nsfw, angst, +18 minors dni !!
> word count: 2.6k
*french writer, i apologize in advance for my awful english!
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AGE: 27 years old
“Where are you going?” Baekhyun asks, stretching as you get out of bed and grab all of your clothes. It was late but you hate sleeping in another bed than yours.
“I should go home.” You simply say, pulling on your panties and jeans as the younger man whines, flipping on his back.
“Oh, come on, Y/N, stay the night.” He suggests as you shake your head with an apologetic smile while putting your bra on.
“Hyesun is getting married, tomorrow. I need to get up early,” You explain, but it was an excuse. You don’t want to be more than intimate enough with anyone.
Once fully clothed, you grab your keys and turn to look at the man still laying completely naked in bed. “I’ll see you on Monday.”
“Aight, boss,” He teases making you roll your eyes. “One last kiss?”
“Bye,” You smile closing the door of his room, hearing him laugh before making your way out of his apartment.
Once in your car, you sigh, leaning on your seat as you stare at the ceiling. Eleven pm already, and tomorrow’s list kept growing in your mind.
Your way home was silent, you didn’t even put music on, mentally listing all the tasks to do tomorrow morning. Drive Hyesun to the hairstylist, make sure that the flowers are delivered, get her dress, and a lot more.
The house should already be decorated by now. Hyesun was getting married at her in-law’s house. They have a big yard and suggested to make the reception in there. Since you couldn’t be here to help today, you ended up with the stressful tasks tomorrow. Her friends aren’t yours.
Yes, you still have a small circle of friends in common, but Hyesun was a sunshine and most of all: an extrovert. She met her husband by boldly asking his number at a coffee shop where he was working, five years ago. Something you could never. That’s probably why you’re still single and she’s getting married.
Kicking your shoes off at your front door, you’re greeted by your cat. He was a little terror. Or a demon like Namjoon loves to call him. And you can’t blame your friend. Not only was Trash a black cat with only one ear, the other got cut off. You don’t know how.
He was already like that when you adopted him. He was skinny and really ugly when you first got him. Well... he’s still ugly, but now he’s well-fed, maybe too much, you chuckle as you kneel to scratch the top of his head. But he was also a tiny demon who attacked everyone who dared to visit you.
“Did you miss me?” You coo as the black cat let out a meow husky enough to let you think that he smokes too many cigarettes. He’s not a loud cat, he occasionally meows when he’s hungry or when you come home after a long day.
As you make your way to the kitchen, the fat cat follows you. Opening the fridge, you take out a bottle of water and gives him a treat. Your eyes fall on the dress you’ll wear tomorrow, hanged at the bedroom door.
The wedding theme was midnight sky. So, obviously, your dress is navy blue and long enough to end at your ankles with a slit on the right side. You didn’t choose it, Hyesun did.
Palming your face, you take a sip of your water and walk to your bedroom. You need a shower. You could still smell Baekhyun’s cheap cologne on your skin. And you hate it. Too used to your own scent. Not of any men anymore.
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The wedding was beautiful, but you didn’t expect less from your best friend. And she was gorgeous in her wedding dress. She smiles a lot, but you never see her smile that way. And all you could think was that her jaw muscles probably hurt after four hours.
“No, what I want, is a whole butterfly starting from my shoulders to my ribs,” Your friend, Hwan explains to you as she flips to show her bare back. You can’t help but scoff, taking a sip of your wine.
“Why? You want to become a fairy or something?” You ask arching a brow as she turns to face you, frowning.
“Don’t make fun of me,” Hwan pouts, folding her arms under her chest, “I saw it on Pinterest, I totally fell in love with it.”
“A tattoo is for life, you know?” You sigh, finishing your glass before tilting your head to brush your fingers on her back, right where her ribs are. “And this part is sensitive. It’ll hurt like hell.”
Hwan shivers at your touch, and you chuckle. You know her. She wants a tattoo today, a piercing tomorrow and in two weeks she’ll regret both. The red head -a dye she did without a second thought- rolls her eyes.
“And you think I can’t handle the pain?” She asks with an attitude, a tone that makes you pinch her forearm as she squirms and step back. “Are you crazy?”
“You can’t handle the pain, Hwan.” You conclude while she rubs the part that start to turn red.
“You’re the worst tattoo artist I know. I’ll give you a bad review on Google.” She groans as you smirk and stick your tongue’s out at her, making her smile amused by you.
Your eyes scan the room full of guests you don’t know before a huge smile spread on your lips as you notice the man all alone. He was sipping his glass of whisky as he looks at his phone, feigning to be interested but he’s probably scrolling emptily. You know him. He hates when people try to connect with him.
Excusing yourself from Hwan and the other girls, you make your way to your friend, too busy on his phone to see you coming.
“Yoongs,” You call him once you’re a few steps closer to him, he lifts his cat eyes from his screen before offering you a slight smirk and opening his arms as you nestle against his chest. You’re not really touchy, but with Yoongi, it was different.
“Nice dress.” He simply says, his nose in your hair before you pull back to look at him. He looks nice too. His hair is longer, but it suits him.
“You didn’t cut your hair?” You ask as he sighs, rolling a strand between his finger as you keep an arm around his waist.
“Didn’t have the time for it.”, He mumbles taking another sip of his whisky. “I didn’t know you would be here. Since you own a tattoo shop, we don’t see you often anymore.”
“It’s my best friend’s wedding, I couldn’t miss it. She would have dragged my ass back here.” you chuckle making him smile and nod.
“That sounds like Hyesun,” He jokes as you smile.
Yoongi wasn’t that tall, but he was still everyone’s type. Calm, mysterious, and good looking. If only dating was on his plans. That guy will probably stay single his whole life, too focused on his work.
“I was looking for you everywhere!” Hyesun groans grabbing your arm.
“I was here,” You simply reply, raising your shoulders, making Yoongi looks at you both amused. You probably get along because you’re both sarcastic. At least you know that’s something he likes about you.
“Thanks Sherlock, Mystery solved!” She rolls her eyes, before pulling you away from your friend, “Come on, follow me, I want to take pictures with you.”
She quickly waves at Yoongi, blowing a kiss at him as he didn’t move before pushing you away.
“He’s like a good old wine. Every time I see him, he’s getting hotter.” She smirks as you make your way to the photographer.
“Aren’t you married?” You joke making her roll her eyes.
“Married, not blind. As long as I touch with my eyes,” She adds as you shake your head, laughing, joining the girls.
Yoongi leaves his empty glass on the table next to him, an amused smirk on his face. If you stayed longer, he would have been part of an interesting reunion.
“Shit, I almost peed myself. There is a whole queue at the male bathroom,” The younger man groans, coming back next to Yoongi as he takes back his beer. “Hyung?”
The older man turns to his friend and arches a brow to show that he’s listening.
“Hyesun told me that there was a private bathroom upstairs for the closest friends” Yoongi simply mumbles, making Jungkook groans as he ties his hair into a bun.
“And you tell me only now?” the tattooed man sighs as he pulls up his sleeves, the temperature of the room getting hotter. Or maybe it’s him from running here and there.
“You left without a word,” Yoongi shrugs like it was obvious, his eyes still on the group of girls making funny faces at the camera. Jungkook lets out a chuckle.
“Which one?” He asks his friend who simply arches a brow. “I’m sure it’s the red head. You always had a think for girls with weird hair colors.”
Yoongi didn’t say anything. He’s used to the teasing. It’s a loss of energy, Jungkook was competitive and if you say that the sky was blue, he would tell otherwise until you tell him he's right.
Jungkook smiles proudly, turning his attention to the bunch of girls. Hyesun had pretty friends, but he’s not surprised. Until he recognized a face. A face he knows too well, a face he loved deeply once upon a time.
You didn’t change. Well… Your hair is shorter. You never liked your hair short, not after your mother spent your childhood cutting it into a bob.
The bangs too. You hated them. But today, you wore it gracefully. His doe eyes trail the length of it, how it brushes your shoulders when you laugh, how you have to push your bang asides.
He never hated you. Even after you broke his heart. Even after coming home to an empty apartment because you disappeared, or when you blocked his number and changed yours. He never hated you.
“You said she wasn’t here.” He frowns, turning to Yoongi who simply arches a brow.
“She wasn’t supposed to.” Yoongi replies, taking a sip of his new glass.
“I shouldn’t have come.” Jungkook sighs, his brows still in a frown creating a slight wrinkle between them.
“Kookie,” Yoongi turns his gaze to his friend who’s clearly uncomfortable. “You’re back in town. You both have the same friends group. What did you expect? You’ll have to confront her one day or another.”
“Y/N,” Hwan calls you as you were taking another glass of wine, facing her with a small hm? “The guy you talked earlier,”
“Yoongi?”
“Yeah, something like that. Do you know his friend?” She asks as you follow her gaze to the large man next to Yoongi, his back facing you. You liked the tattoos, and the muscular frame. The long hair was clearly a bonus.
“No,” You reply, your eyes trailing on Yoongi’s friend. You’ll definitely ask Yoongi who that is later.
“He’s hot,” Hwan comments as you nod, taking a sip of your wine before spitting everything out. You cough when the mysterious man turns around, laughing with your friend.
And almost immediately, you hide behind the table that separates you. Was this a joke?
“What’s wrong? One of your one-night stands?” Hwan chuckles clearly amused to see you, on your knees, trying to hide under the table. If only you could be sucked up by the floor. It was stupid. It was an old story. It’s been seven years since you dumped him like an old, forgotten sock.
“It’s my ex,” You almost whisper, making Hwan wide her eyes and hide with you like she even met him before.
You never thought that you’ll see him again. He disappeared for Japan right after your breakup for his studies. And you didn’t think about him since then. Well, it’s a lie.
You thought about him the three first years after your split. But, he was just some old memories from the shoebox under your bed. 
Some love letters written by a teenage boy, an empty bottle of perfume and a shirt of his that you didn’t have the heart to throw. But that’s all he was. A shoebox of memories.
“Oh damn,” Hwan murmurs, “How did you get that hot piece of man?” She asks as you roll your eyes.
He wasn’t that hot when you started dating him. He had a chestnut haircut, was too skinny even if he was the sporty type, and huge doe eyes. Now he’s…. a man.
“I think… I need to get out”, You swallow, get up and finish your glass. Walking to the backyard, you catch a bottle on your way.
Thankfully, Hwan didn’t follow you. A few persons were outside, some of them making out, the others too drunk, and probably getting some fresh air like you.
Did Hyesun invite him? Why did he come? He knows that she’s your friend. That you’d be here. Palming your face, you lean back against the wall, taking a sip of your bottle of champagne. Fuck… This is childish. You’re twenty-seven, for God’s sake. Act like an adult.
“Hiding?” You heard on your right, making you almost jump.
And here he was, a few meters away, a bottle of beer in hand. His eyes changed. He grew up.
“Good evening, Jungkook,” You breathe as he offers you a slight smile, his lips mostly forming a line.
“Good evening, Y/N,” He replies, making a few steps closer, “Long time no see.”
“Yeah...”
A silence falls between you before he takes a breath like he wants to calm his nerves too. Were you two nervous around each other?
“How… have you been?” He asks with a soft voice.
“Good. You?”
“Good.”
“Nice.”
You wanted to punch yourself. That conversation was stupid. Back then, you two could debate about everything for hours. Now, you can’t even have a basic conversation.
“I… Didn’t know you were back.” You say, looking at the grass at your feet.
“Yeah… I- I missed Korea.” He raises his shoulders slightly before taking a sip of his beer.
“Oh…Okay.” You scrunch your nose and take a sip of your bottle to not look too much stupid but his lips crease in an amused smile at the bottle in your hand. Neither of you says anything. And it’s weird. “That’s… some cool tattoos,” You add, trying to make the conversation as you point his entire inked sleeve with your chin.
“Yeah?” He chuckles awkwardly. “I always wanted tattoos.”
“I know.” You reply, almost immediately, making him lift his gaze to you as your eyes widen. “You- hm- You thought that Yakuza were cool.” you continue as he nods, his eyes still on you while you look away.
“You remembered.”
You clench your jaw slightly and take another sip of champagne. You hate champagne, but you didn’t read what was written on the bottle when you took it.
“Your father must be proud of you. I heard you had your own tattoo shop.” He says as your gaze soften. Jungkook and your dad were always close, he even called him ‘son’. Your father was in fact, proud of you.
“He is”, was all you could reply, and he nods silently before taking a deep breath.
“Can I… ask you a question? I need to understand something” He frowns a little, turning his head to look at the backyard before finally glancing back at you. He is waiting for you to answer and you simply stare at him. “Why did you leave me, Y/N?”
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WATTPAD.
buy me a coffee<3 (every chapters/drabbles are posted as soon as i'm done writing them.)
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darkst4lker · 28 days ago
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crawling back to you. // sirius black
marauders era!sirius black x slytherin!reader
plot: sirius and you had been forced to be engaged by your families with the intention of maintain blood purity since you were twelve and he was thirteen. as time passed you became very close in an attempt to survive the situation together but you didn't expected him to leave you behind when he escaped from his family home. months later you decided to follow his steps and like clockwork, you were on the doorstep of the potters, crawling back to sirius one last time. tw: fem!reader, ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LENGUAGE!!, a lot of fluff, mentions of smut (nothing graphic), trauma, abusive families, forced engagement, very slightly unhealthy romantic dynamics between reader and sirius, a lot of angst and trauma bonding. maybe a bit of ooc sirius. notes: hiiii, this was supposed to be a christmas special but i didn't got to post it on time lmao, please enjoy it. this has a couple references to some songs!! iykyk, also my apologies for being so slow with requests i swear i am working on them i just can't help writing a thousand things at the same time. AND YES there's another sirius one-shot in the making that will be ready soon!! stay tuned!!
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your steps were quick even in the cold, cruel snow. it was christmas eve, and a fast look to the clock on your right wrist announced that in two hours would be midnight.
the truth was that you never left your home this late without your parents. and for the first time the wand with a dragon heartstring core hiding in your sleeve didn't provide the safety feeling it did inside of hogwarts.
godric's hollow was full of christmas lights in every house, but the tears that left your eyes proved that you weren't in the mood to acknowledge the beauty of that special night. unlike the last sixteen years in your life, christmas felt uncomfortable and unfamiliar.
nervousness flooded your guts, doubts of the possible resolutions surrounding what you were about to do. the violent and suffocating memories of better times, or worst times if you looked at it from the perspective of the person you shouldn't have fallen in love with were destroying your insides.
and not to mention the ghost of the choice you made, lingering on your face in the form of a bruise you dear mother had planted on your cheek just like a loving kiss.
and the irony of the matter was, that your mother was the one to blame for all the things that were happening.
she had personally arranged your engagement with sirius orion black when you were twelve. she had made you fit into pretty dresses for all the parties in the black family home. she had taught you to care for him, to like him. she put sirius in your life and now that you loved him, fulfilling her desires, she hated you for it.
yet your loyalties were set. and there was no turning back now.
you remembered the night you met sirius, in his family home. grimmauld place was full of pureblood friends of both of your parents and your whole families.
in a display of respect, your parents had put you in a lovely and quite formal black dress. it was uncomfortable but for your mother, you tried.
you always tried.
you were born trying.
and in the moment you saw sirius, who you had seen before in hogwarts but never in detail, a sigh left your lips.
sirius was beautiful, dark. an obscure aura surrounded his face features, proving in an instant he had inherited all his family traits and even perfected them. yet the detail that stayed in your heart was the rebellious look on his face that never left even years later.
his eyes spoke in a secret language, subtly announcing he was a miracle of nature, the lion who was born in a snake nest.
and you quickly understood him. from the way his tie and hair were a bit messy, to the glass of wine he "accidentally" spilled on his mother. you noticed every act of silent revolution, and in some way you adored it.
almost by the end of the night, your parents left the both of you alone in the living room while his parents made a tour of the house for the guests.
to sirius, the first words you said to each other were always haunting his home and when he left, he carried them his chest like a knife, a vestige of resilience.
“i'm sorry.” it was the only words you could say. if sirius was angry before, you managed to escape from his temper radar.
he looked at you, a tortured sigh leaving his lips. his eyes now meeting yours and clouding your brain for a moment. the mesmerizing effect the sound of his voice provoked in your guts prophesied the sweet fate you would suffer one day.
“i'm sorry too.” he answered.
the two of you stayed in silence. sirius was starting to be known in hogwarts as a womanizer. he flirted with every person who caught his eye, and he wanted to experience them all. you were not one of them and you knew it.
he did not mess with slytherins. the known fame of being blood purists and dark wizards catched up with every kid who followed the serpent path even if you liked to think you were not like that because if you really weren't, most of your friends were.
in the end, you were associated with lucius, narcissa, evan and barty. you had hanged out with regulus multiple times, they were your friends and sirius obviously believed you were exactly like the most of them.
another pureblood perfect girl, raised to be tied to a man, bear an heir and die in the resentful solitude of her own home after a long unhappy and painful marriage.
but you knew from the start that you hated just the idea of it, even if was truly the life your parents planned for you because every single one of the things surrounding this kind of living was completely and utterly fake from the very beggining.
it was a game flooded with unhappiness, made to drain the joy of boys like sirius and sacrifice the girls like you by throwing them to the hungry wolves of motherhood.
yet, sirius had the typical greed of a young man and you wanted him to live the teenage love you craved to experience too. you had found a common ground, a piece to move on this board to save the both of you and help you stick together.
you clinged on this hope for dear life before speaking again.
“we don't need to love each other. i won't mind if you keep dating people .” you said, now avoiding his deep eyes. “the only thing i ask is for you to not treat me like an enemy.”
and that was the last thing you said to him before your parents appeared to announce you were leaving, bringing you back to the cold reality outside sirius presence.
after that night, you assumed he would ignore you in school but he didn't. it was a slow process for the both of you but after some time, he showed he now cared for you and you reciprocated.
when you were sick in the nursery, sirius would come around to check on you and he always brought you chocolate frogs. if he was irritated after losing a quidditch match, you would join his friends and take him to hogsmeade to cheer him up.
when your parents threatened you if you didn't had perfect grades, sirius would hug you. and when his parents got angry with him and sent horrible letters, you would hug him back.
sirius made you realize how abusive were your family and his, and how awful were your blood purist friends.
“someday i will leave my house.” he said to you one day while you were having lunch together in the gryffindor table. he didn't seem like he was joking. “and you need to leave too.”
“i don't know sirius. i'm not brave like you.” you answered. “i won't last outside my home, i love my parents.”
“you can't tolerate those assholes telling you what to do all your life.” he always answered when you had that same discussion. “they're going to ruin you in the end.”
and every single time, you fought back the urge to say that you were already ruined.
after a year you became friends, you thought. and when you reached your fourth year, it was clear you both were growing up. he got awfully handsome and a part of you started to fall for him.
every time the feeling invaded your chest, you dismissed it, because you knew he could never love you in the situation you were.
yet, he was still a man, and you started to caught his eye.
a new tradition settled between the both of you: once per week, you would have a date. it was in one of those dates where things would get even more messy than before.
“sirius.” you called him while you walked.
the hogsmeade streets were covered in thin snow, and you had insisted for hours to go to honeydukes but he had been too distracted in zonko's to hear you. now that you were outside, you were desperate to get something sweet.
“i know, honeydukes.” he answered, smilling. “i heard you the first million times you said it.”
“that means you were ignoring me!” you complained, taking your hand to your chest in a gesture of obvious fake offense. then a smile betrayed your little act. “you didn't answered at all inside there!”
sirius softly laughed, and you couldn't avoid noticing the way his leather jacket made him more attractive than you already thought he was.
“oh please, (y/n). you were being awfully persistent and i'm not a man of patience.” he said, jokingly. “would you have rather for me to shut up my beautiful future wife in front of everyone?” sirius added with certain sarcastic tone in his voice and then, he proceeded to softly ruffle your hair.
all he said was a painfully obvious joke, because he was messing with you. there was not a single hint of seriousness on his words and yet they went straight to your soul, making your heart painfully skip a beat.
after a while, you got to honeydukes and he decided to wait outside to smoke while you bought sweets. in the exact moment you were about to go outside with a plastic bag full of candy hanging from your hand, you casually saw through the store windows how sirius flirted with a girl you had seen in hogwarts multiple times. just as you opened the door to come back to him, he gave her a little peck and she left quickly like a breeze passing by.
it was not the first time you had seen something like that, nor the worst. many times before you even saw him making out with different people in hogwarts, but this had never happened in the middle of one of your weekly dates.
after that, you were incapable of hiding your new found bad mood the rest of your date, and sirius suggested in a caring gesture to get back to the school. of course he didn't knew why you were suddenly irritated, but he did noticed that something was happening and his first guess was that you needed to rest.
while you walked back to hogwarts, the bomb in your chest exploded. you stopped on your tracks and sirius walked a few steps before turning, a bit worried.
“hey, (y/n)." he said. "are you oka-...?”
the sudden sound of your voice interrupted him.
“are you really that good kissing girls?” it was the first thing that came out of your mouth. the words came out bitter. “or everyone says it because you just look good?”
“what?” his reaction was truly sincere in the amount of surprise he felt. that was probably the last thing sirius expected to hear from you, but he kept listening.
“seriously, i want to know. are you a good kisser?” you insisted. “because your brains are surely not enough to have the whole school crushing on you.”
“are you calling me stup-...?”
“i am asking why every single person who made out with you has to talk about how good you are.” you continued, still bitter. “because i don't wanna know, and i don't wanna hear it or see it. and i do think you're stupid indeed.”
of course you didn't really took sirius orion black for a stupid man, it was the anger in your throat talking shit you did not thought with the sole purpose of making him feel a bit bad.
sirius made a pause before talking, all the puzzle pieces suddenly falling into place and slowly revealing the motives of your fury. if you were another person he would probably stormed off by then, but you weren't.
and he surely was kind of enjoying this.
“(y/n), are you jealous?”
his question punched you in the face with the strength of a storm.
“no.” you quickly answered. a prideful word that slithered from your tongue in a desperate try to not appear vulnerable, until you fucked up by adding a question. “but why did you have to do that shit in one of our dates?”
a playful smile settled itself on his lips and you noticed he saw right through you. he always did, in some way.
“so you are jealous.” sirius stood with his arms crossed, looking at you. in a matter of seconds, you felt disarmed.
“of course not, why would i-...?” a desperate gasp drowned in your throat at the feeling of getting caught so quickly.
“for a slytherin, you're a terrible liar.” he said, shutting your words off. “but you're right, i'm sorry. i shouldn't have done that in our date.” he was still smiling like a tease.
“i-i-...” you stuttered.
your heartbeat was feral, and the way he calmly dismembered your worries made it all worse.
“you know, love, if you wanted a kiss you just had to ask for it.” sirius bet was high, he knew it. but he could see that you both needed this.
you felt your brain malfunctioning over his words yet you stayed prideful, not wanting to bend your dignity for him.
“i don't want-...”
suddenly, sirius approached you with brutal impulsiveness and got his final revenge for the multiple times you had interrupted him minutes ago. his lips met yours so fast that you dropped your bag of candy in the bare floor before your hands moved straight to hold his face.
he held your cheeks too, keeping you close as he took control. you were now trapped on sirius spell, and he proved how good of a kisser he truly was.
your first kiss, now layed on his heart forever. it would be another thing for him to treasure in the deep core of his soul when he ran away from his house years later.
after your mouths separateed it was clear that your irritation was gone. the look you gave to him in the close intimacy of the moment reminded him of a deer with big eyes.
“look at you, it this what it takes to soothe you?” he teased. “a couple of kisses and you're back to normal?”
you started to like the thought of marrying him.
“shut up, siri.”
it was in that exact moment when your relationship took a step further and making out in empty classrooms in the middle of the night at least once per month became a normal thing between you.
yet you knew he did the same with almost every walking girl on hogwarts so your illusions never grew because they were dead from the very start. it was okay. you didn't needed any exclusivity from him, sirius was feeding all the feelings you didn't fully notice you had and he was enjoying his teenage years.
it's okay, you repeated all the time to yourself. thinking about him with another person made you awfully jealous, but it was really okay. everything was right.
you didn't loved sirius black. yes, you liked him, he was handsome, mysterious and charismatic. the obscure aura that surrounded him still had its claws firmly dug into your skin since the first time you met him but still, you didn't loved sirius black.
or at least that was what you convinced yourself of.
then you got to fifth year and your parents got persistent with the fact that you needed to remain a virgin until you marry sirius. his parents were insisting too and before the year ended you were absolutely tired of it. in a new form of revolution, you and sirius got wilder every time you were alone.
your nights became the tale of a stygian lion hunting a dragon snake and sirius firmly believed he was hooked up to your venom. a soft, sweet serenade of kisses drowned in moonlight. but the innocence of it would die one specific night when he sneaked you into the gryffindor dorms while the students were partying in the common room.
you watched everyone drink and dance the night away while going up slowly by the stairs, sirius holding your hand. remus and james gave you a fast yet playful stare from the sofas of the common room and then you looked at sirius, who was distracted.
in that moment, like a melancholic joke of fate, sirius turned his head for a second to look at you. it was quick and barely noticeable but it was there, almost like orpheus guiding eurydice trough hell with the sole purpose of saving her yet carrying enough love inside of him to not resist the ought of looking if she was still there, with him.
once inside the dorm he guided you to his bed, he made sure to kiss your hands, arms, face and almost every part of you he could reach. sirius took care of all so you could focus on experimenting every single act of love executed that night.
he sneaked his hand between your legs and talked you through it softly, compelling you to fall apart into his arms. he held you tenderly when he went inside you, trying his best to not cause any pain and whispered sweet nothings in your ear as he guided you to your release.
it felt like if he had devoured your soul while allowing you to do the same to him, a ritualistic exchange that from that moment on, stayed in his skin like a tattoo.
you had your first time in sirius arms, and after you were done you knew that hurting you would never be part of his rebellion.
crying in each others arms after spending nights togehter also became more and more common as he started to fight more with his parents. as your fingers played with the dark locks of his hair before you felt asleep, it was clear that the doom for both of you was near and you could feel it.
“shh, everything is okay.” it was the tenth time you said that same sentence in the dark of night, holding sirius head against your chest as he silently cried. “i'm here, siri. we're going to be okay.”
“i just can't understand why they have to do this.” he whispered. “they don't see how much this is hurting us?”
you caressed his hair and his arms locked around your waist.
“i'm not sure what is crossing our parents minds.” you answered. “but i know we're going to survive this. together.”
sirius hid his face against you. his tears had stopped but his face was slightly red.
“one day i'll run away, and i will become a rockstar. and you will write and publish all the books you want.” he said. “we'll be free, i swear it on...”
he took a moment to think his next words.
“on...?” a weak smile settled on your face.
“on james. or maybe his mom.” sirius joked. “maybe on both of them so it's more important.” he laughed softly still having a sad undertone on his words.
you did the same as him, and your fingers interwined with his hair almost like rewarding the way he had managed to make you laugh.
“please don't leave without me.” you pleaded and words came like a whisper but sirius wasn't there to hear them, because he had fell asleep on your arms.
before you could noticed how cruel of a prankster fate can be, when you started your sixth year sirius instantly fleed his home and moved in with james potter.
chaos infested your families. your parents and his were livid, your mother was desperate to find you a new fiancé and sirius started to completely avoid you in hogwarts.
no more kissing, or long nights in each other's company. no more talking and sharing your worries. sirius made clear that you were now in different sides of the coin, and it destroyed your whole world in a second.
but at the same time you were in pain, the situation had woken a fierceness in your insides that you believed you had inside since you were born, but it was repressed for the sake of the peace in your family.
you were furious with your parents for controlling you, with sirius family for what they did to him, and with sirius himself for leaving you behind.
and that was the reason you were now approaching the potter's home with stolen money from your parents and all your luggage in the cold snow of christmas eve.
the truth was, you didn't know what you were exactly expecting or seeking. what you did know was that you wanted sirius to look at you in the eyes one last time and acknowledge your existence, your presence, your tears.
you wanted him to know that even if his family didn't care, you were in pain because you did.
so, with your heart in your throat and your soul hanging from your hands in despair you knocked at the door and patiently waited.
you were freezing outside the house but it didn't mattered anymore. the motivation in your chest eliminated all the doubts you could ever have.
when the door finally opened, james potter face received you. he had a smile on his face that almost faded in disbelief when he saw you.
“oh shit- sorry, hello (y/n).” he said, clearly surprised but polite. “are you okay? can i help you?”
“sorry james, i don't mean to intrude this late on a day like this one” you said, a certain weakness clouding your voice in melancholic chords. “can i speak to sirius?”
james looked at you, not really knowing what to say.
“i- yes, sure.” he finally answered. “do you want to come in?”
“no, it's okay. i don't want to be invasive.” you said. “it'll be really fast.”
the boy in front of you sighed and fixed the position of his glasses. then he gave you a weak smile.
it was not that james didn't liked you because in fact he did, he just had the fear that you were here to convince sirius of coming back home.
a quick and more detailed look at your face and he realized that was not the reason you were in his doorstep.
“i'll go get him, give me a second.” was what he said before entering the house again, leaving the door a bit opened.
you peeked briefly and a warm light recieved you along with the smell of food, making painfully obvious that you hadn't eaten anything since breakfast.
a few seconds later, sirius appeared completely opening the door in a fast and almost desperate move like if you were going to vanish if he didn't got to you quick enough.
james was behind him, distant to the conversation but still supervising to defend his friend if necessary.
“(y/n)” said sirius, looking at you like if you weren't real.
“merry christmas, siri.” you said, greeting him. the first words you both exchanged in months.
the nickname pierced his skin with violence, the vestiges of you and him were standing strong like an unforgettable oath in the corners of his brain.
your face was wet by tears and a subtone of red clouded your cheeks because of the cold and the bruise on your cheek was getting more purple as time went by. his eyes met yours, speaking that same old secret lenguage you now understood. then, you took a deep breath.
“what happened? what are you doing here?” he asked, confused and quite worried. “who hurted you? where are your parents?”
“i ran away from home.” you confessed, answering absolutely and every single one of his questions the sentence twisted sirius guts into oblivion and he stayed silent, thinking what to say.
he wanted to take you in, bring you to live with the potters, shelter you from the cold, heal your wounds and kiss your forehead even if he knew it wasn't that easy. you continued speaking.
“i don't expect you to welcome me into your life again, i assumed you wanted to distance yourself from the part of you that obviously includes me.” you started saying, measuring every word. sirius sighed. “but before we don't see eachother again, i need to tell you what i feel.”
there was a brief silence, and you swallowed back tears.
“i have imagined a thousand times what could be the result of coming here and speak about this, none of them had exactly a happy ending because i know by heart that you don't feel the same as me.” every word hurted you more than you thought. “but now that i've burned everything and followed your path, i have nothing more to lose.”
sirius looked at you and again, he saw righ through you. an understanding smile appeared on his lips, inviting you to continue.
“im listening, love.” he dared to say, noticing you were struggling to continue.
you took another deep breath before speaking.
“i've hated my parents since i was born, im sure of it. and just like you, when they trapped us in this mess, i was livid.” that was it, words started to come out one after the other. “but i was trained to endure so i tried my best to get along with you like my mom taught me. she always said to me that love wasn't important when it came to duty, and that my duty was to learn how to love you, respect you and give you kids. and if i didn't wanted to obey, she would hit me.” you sobbed, and sirius took a couple of steps closer to you.
the nasty mark on your cheek made clear to him that obeying your mother was exactly what got you that bruise. a bruise earned out of devotion for sirius, even if he didn't fully knew that yet.
he used his hand to fix a hair that kept falling on your face, and dismissed one of your tears carefully with his thumb.
“i know what youre thinking, because i thought the same every single time she explained that to me and yet, i tried to follow her words the best i could. and after getting to know you better and speaking of our shitty parents, i started to feel things. i was too young to notice but i know now that i've been going trough this for ages.” air got stuck in your throat, you talked too fast. “and i know i am giving it way too much thought, but my point is that i love you. and i've been doing so not long after i met you. i died inside everytime we layed on your bed and you spoke of getting away from your family because even if it was by the will of our sick, twisted parents, i really wanted to marry you.”
sirius wiped your tears again, giving you all his attention.
“but with time i changed my mind. i don't want to marry you because we have to but because we have the desire to do it. i really just want you to be happy siri, but before leaving me like that you need to tell me because-...” you sobbed again, and sirius caressed your cheek, soothing your cries. “you need to know that your parents, your brother, your cousins; they may not care but i do, i desperately do. im in an awful pain because i care for you so much that when you left everything fell apart in my life, and now im once again crawling back to you like i always do, hoping that you may want to have me.” you finished your monologue, one that you practiced a thousand times before this moment only to end up saying everything by heart and not by practice.
when you ended up talking, your body finally gave you proper permission to burst into tears. sirius recieved you in his arms by hugging you tightly and that was the first moments of warmth you got after a long time.
“shh, it's okay. you're okay now.” one of sirius hands caressed your back and the other went tenderly to your hair. “i'm sorry i left without saying anything and ignored you after.” he apologized, holding back some tears because seeing how you were crying was starting to make him to cry too.
“i really thought that you would be happier and better marrying someone picked by your parents, i had nothing to offer and being seen with a blood traitor would had ruined your image.” he continued. “i-i know it's a stupid reason, but what you said to me years ago sticked with me. you said you weren't strong enough to leave your parents, and i decided you didn't needed to get your life with your parents ruined because of my choices”
“b-but we talked about us running away before.” you answered, raising your head to look at him.
“we did, but once i did it i got so scared-.. ” tears finally won over him and he sobbed. “because i had nothing to offer you, not a home, not a way to protect you and even less money. i would be ruined if it wasn't for james and his family.”
you held him more tightly, as if you were about to melt with each other.
“and the cherry on top was that i thought you didn't loved me.” he admitted. “i was convinced that you didn't wanted to marry me or be with me. leaving was also my way of freeing you from us.”
you broke the hug for a moment, just like the first time he kissed you, you suddenly pulled him to you to lovingly smash your lips against his.
for the first time in a long time, sirius black was genuinely surprised. he grabbed your face and you kissed him softly, the love you spoke of was real.
all his doubts vanished in the cold wind, almost like sealing an oath of devotion. nothing in your sixteen years of life would had prepared you to reveal the secrets you've held inside your heart, but now that you did it and he did too, there was no turning back.
you quickly understood that your place, your home, your family, had always been sirius. the only person who understood the living hell you were going through and who did his best to make it better just like you did with him.
finally, the tale of the the snake and the lion was getting a resolution and they were now finding their ways back to each other's hearts like a forgotten mantra coming back from the death to be recited one more time.
“i love you, sirius.” was the first thing you said when you separated.
“i love you too.” he answered, still holding your face.
after a moment, when the both of you finally stopped crying, sirius interrogated you about where were you going to spend the night.
you didn't planned to stay at the potter's that night, but james had listened everything from where he stood and being the blast of sun and sweetness he was, he spoke to his parents and in an instant you were spending christmas in a warm house with sirius, james and his family.
that night in sirius room, the two of you layed together like many times before. his head on your chest, arms in your waist and your fingers playing with his hair while your other hand sweetly caressed his back.
this time was completely different though, because the whispering conversation wasn't about running away from your parents or his. this time, for the first time, you spoke of what you felt for each other.
“i love you forever.” he said in one moment. your heart jumped of emotion.
“i love you too, siri.” you answered.
he sighed in your chest.
“you don't know how much i awfully missed you” sirius admitted, moving to kiss you innocently on the neck.
“i missed you too, more than i thought i could.” you said, closing your eyes, ready to sleep intertwined with him.
those were the same exact words you would repeat to each other years later when you finally reunited, after fate violently separated the both of you and your godson, harry potter, managed to reveal the truth of the man who betrayed his parents.
and once again you would hold him in the deep night, now inside of grimmauld place, the very house he was raised in.
the house who saw your love being gestated in the middle of a poisoned river.
but now, you both were cleaning the violence, the traumatic memories and the haunted voices out of every wall; writing in the ceiling that a love this strong may never die.
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I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS!! i do think the ending is awful oh my god i might change it. anyways, be safe. xoxo.
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reinreingoawayy · 10 days ago
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sae was super against the idea of having a pet cat. one, he thought they were mean, and two, he couldn’t stand the smell of their shit. so when he sees you holding a small black stray cat, both—you and the cat—drenched from the rain, he couldn’t help himself from shaking his head while he grabs towels for you and for the cat. he suggested bringing it to the animal shelter, which you disagreed right away as you tucked the poor cat into your arms as if he was going to snatch it from you and throw it to the nearest animal shelter.
he exhaled as he watch you give your full attention to the cat.
“so what are you gonna do about it now?” he asked.
“i don’t know—keep it?” you said, gently patting the towel on the cat’s body.
“but—”
“but i want to make sure you’re okay with it first,” you said.
“you know the answer,” he said with finality in his voice.
“can’t i change your mind? at all?”
sae looked away because he knows—he knows himself that he’d eventually give in to those pleading eyes. sae had always been this tough guy, but for some reason, the tough, hard to please, unchanging mind, becomes all too soft for you. it was almost like you had him in a spell that he couldn’t get through, not that he’d want to get through.
for him, what comes first is you. regardless of what he wants, it was always you first, and he was okay with it. seeing how your eyes would light up, the way you curl the corners of your lips when you’re happy was enough reason for him to put you first before anything else.
but having a pet cat was a different topic. he was very open about not wanting it. so, it was a challenge for you to persuade him. it only took a lot of pleases and promises and few bribes here and there before he finally exhaled with defeat. that was your cue that he was finally giving in.
“fine,” he said softly.
you beamed and almost jumped onto him for a hug.
“thank you!” you said again and again.
“but we must have conditions,” he said as you sat back to your seat, ready to listen to his conditions. there was a handful but you were more than willing to cooperate if that meant you could finally have a cat.
after bringing the cat to the veterinary clinic to make sure she was all good, you both went to a pet store to buy some stuff for the small cat. you were all giddy and excited as you survey each aisle, thinking and grabbing all the stuff you thought she might need while sae push the cart behind you.
“do you think this is excessive?” you asked sae.
he quickly shrugged his shoulders. “if you think it’s good for her, then go for it,” he replied, making your heart melt for a moment. you felt a warm fuzzy feeling in your chest that it almost made you tear up in front of the whole store.
after buying all the stuff, you went back home, played with the kitten while sae goes out for his usual football practice. if you don’t have work, you’d stay at home doing random stuff to fill up the boredom. he usually comes back before dinner time, if there’s intensive training, he comes back before midnight, and today is that day. when he comes back, it’s either you were already asleep or binge watching a series with your skincare on.
tonight, you decided to wait for him while you play with the kitten, but exhaustion came faster than sae and before you even know, you were knocked out on the couch with the ball of yarn on your hand. before you pass out, you could’ve sworn you heard the door unlocked but you drifted anyway.
sae sighed, watching you sound asleep on the couch. the blue ball of yarn was still on your hand and the small cat was laying beside you, perfectly loafed.
“hi there,” sae said, kneeling in front of you and the kitten. he felt stupid for greeting the animal, but when the kitten let out a small meow, he was taken aback.
“sorry if i acted that way earlier. truth is, i don’t really know how to take care of someone like you and i’m a little afraid that i might end up neglecting you, but don’t worry. your mom, right here…” he said, pointing at you, still sleeping.
“she’s gonna take good care of you and i will do my best to do my part as well. i’m sorry if i ever had you feel you were not welcome here. i just really don’t know what to react. it’s a me problem. you are definitely most welcome.”
he bit his lower lip as he tried to scratch the kitten’s back hesitantly, but when the kitten leaned on to his touch, he felt a slight relief.
“so how was your day with your mom? did you do anything fun?” he smiled.
“my practice was fine. it was tiring and almost felt redundant, but i love football so it’s fine. i hope you find what you love soon. i’d like to see it.”
“one last thing i have to tell, love your mom as much as i love her, okay? i hope you see how much of a wonderful person she is. she’s the best you could ever have,” he said before finally nudging your shoulders to wake you up.
“wake up, love,” he said in a very soft voice.
you hummed, pretending not to hear all of what he said just now.
“i love you, sae,” you whispered.
“you heard that, didn’t you?” he said.
“maybe?”
“i love you, too. now lemme get you to a proper bed.”
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