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crushedsweets · 1 year ago

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Do you have and hcs of how Toby and Ben would act together? - Hoodie

YES SORT OF . u know the drill this is my au and bens story is one that i changed a lot so here we go :9

ok toby younger brother family trauma issues lonely grew up isolated etc. ben only child got killed by neighbor for absurd vr theory now inhabits a virus-ghost-form that he partially shares with several other dead kids.

toby and ben wouldnt have gotten along before ben died. only because ben was just. a 13 yr old boy addicted to video games ... those kids r mean, and toby was heavily bullied in his childhood. the ONLY reason bens not a huge dick anymore is bc his 'form' itself is fucked up (he glitches, he has an electronic vocal fry and occasional stutter from glitches, he has a weird glow to him, sickly drowned boy skin, veins look like those green code lines, red/black eyes, HE'S LITERALLY DRESSED LIKE LINK). bens not exactly insecure about any of this, but he knows damn well he cannot make fun of a tic without toby shooting back 10x harder.

which ok yeah kinda sad that ben has to look weird for him to not be mean but .. . like . . yeah. it is what it is.

they met mmm... maybe when toby was around 21? jeff would be 16, and ben wouldve been 14. SOOO toby doesnt really TRY to befriend ben. he's too old for him and has no interest in being besties w some kid. but he has a job to stop ben from tormenting people online and drawing attention to weird ghost sites and whatnot, so he started talking to all sorts of ai- cleverbot being the main, of course.

of all the proxies, tobys the only one ben likes. tobys a dick, but he has his moments where he's funny and gets distracted during a mission, so he's sat and rambled and bickered with the ai on slow nights. ben immediately knew everything about toby, because he has access to every single file on tobys computer, phone, etc.

ben SCARED THE SHIT out of toby upon their first meeting. he crawled out of tobys janky ass computer one day and toby nearly threw up from being so freaked out. yeah, he's killed people and whatever, BUT GHOSTS R FUCKING SCARY (and he has .trauma with ghosts and hallucinations of them (lyra)). ben already knew exactly who toby worked for, what toby was doing, and thought it was beyond funny. ben was the first being who already knew all the slenderman lore because he spends literally. every. second. on the internet. he is basically the internet. and he watches them, listens through their phones, watches, etc. he doesnt know the details perfectly tho cuz technology gets weird around slednerman/the operator. so toby thought that was helpful, in a sense.

so pretty quickly ben was fond of toby. thought he was like, that cool older brother of your friend. the main issue was the proxies at this time were trying to find and kill jeff because he was infected by the operator and slenderman deemed him 'too far gone.'

ben was actually the one who proposed the whole 'okay. so you want me to stop terrorizing kids online. fair. now ive noticed you keep trying to kill my friend(jeff). stop that and we can be cool :3'.

eventually they all came to some weird agreement where. ben will stop haunting people, the proxies will stop trying to kill jeff, jeff has to stop doing his 'full course' murders, and eventually, ben just likes them enough to start helping them with cctv, police files, etc. it was a complicated agreement that eventually ended in friendship, sort of?

they play video games together. eventually toby does see him as a little brother. it's kinda unsettling because the proxies realize just how much power ben has when it comes to just...... leaking everything. toby thinks that 'ok well, if ben leaks stuff about us, we leak stuff about jeff, and now he has no friends and is lonely, so he can't.' but tim and brian are legitimately freaked out at the thought of their lives being ruined anymore than they already are, so theyre pretty courteous to ben

ben will really just hang around. toby can just be eating breakfast and ben will pop up and ask whats up. he's annoying and clingy, and he can tell toby is biting his tongue half the time. . but toby is grateful sometimes. bens laid back and funny, and toby could use some laughs, so its a decent time for them both

again, overall, toby is just kinda too old for ben(although ben wouldve been a year older than toby if he was alive), but ben is really funny, he's nice to toby, he plays video games with him, he comes and checks in on him randomly. so toby appreciates having a freaky ghost little brother thing hanging around. bens one of his fave people (which is only saying so much when the other people he talks to are like . . jeff)

#ticci toby #ticci toby headcanons #ben drowned #ben drowned headcanons #hcs #creeped #lord do i talk.#um #hey.#sorry.#i hope this does talk enough about how they act around eachother #i just feel the need to explain hella context otherwise i'd feel my explanation on their friendship is too random LOL

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dateamonster · 1 year ago

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webcomics*! webcomics baby!!! i grew up reading these bad boys like they were the sunday funnies. im serious i would get up early in so i could check my daily roster of webcomic updates before leaving for school.

webcomics sort of feel to me like my generations version of zines. not that both those things arent still around, i just mean that, in the same way that there was this big boom of super creative zine self-publishing in the 70s through the 90s thanks to the increasing access to copy machines, and later home printing, the early 00s-10s was sort of the moment people seemed to collectively realize they could kind of just upload whatever they wanted to the internet and people would actually see it, leading naturally to another boom in indie art and storytelling.

a lot of the comics that popped up around this time were sort of... rough. raw. weird. there were no rules about what a webcomic had to be other than 1) a comic and 2) on the web, so there was some freedom to be as messy or as precise as the author wanted. this led to some real bangers, and some absolute flops. but regardless of how it turned out i think theres something to be admired about the sheer amount of creativity going into these projects that, for the most part, were purely passion-driven without any guarantee of greater recognition or success.

obviously webcomics are still around, but the culture surrounding them has shifted quite a bit. most people who are willing to put in the work of a longform serialized comic In This Economy are also doing so with the hope of being able to profit or at least sustain themselves financially on their work. theres no shame in that! but it has made the webcomic scene more competitive, more polished, less experimental. capitalism at work, you know.

people arent really as incentivized to try new things and dare i say get a little weird with it when innovation doesnt pay the pills. however that doesnt mean that there arent still artists out there who are challenging that.

i got the idea a while ago that i wanted to put together a list of webcomics that have been really influential to me and my own creative efforts, but i realized that list would be a mile long and wouldnt really give me the breathing room to talk about why those works resonate with me. so i decided instead to make a list specifically of my (currently) most beloved, most influential webcomics that i feel like are doing something unique that sort of pushes the boundaries of what is considered a "normal" comic.

presented in no particular order, with all attempts made to be spoiler-free, below:

nasty red dogs and feast for a king by kosmicdream (18+)

delicious, dark, meaty comics. ffak in particular is like this massive sprawling scifi stream of consciousness thick with blood and viscera and. a lot of highly transsexual erotic cannibalism tbqh.

personally i find nasty red dogs a lot more like easy to get into story-wise, but both are just chockablock full of this beautiful grotesque unapologetic and downright indulgent physicality. its pages dripping with every fluid you can think of and some you cant, and its also compelling surprisingly empathetic characters set against a backdrop of otherworldly rituals, cosmic pre-apocolypses, and worlds inside of worlds inside of worlds. body horror heaven lives here.

mr boop and crimehot by alec robbins (very 18+)

if youre at all into weird webcomics youre probably already well familiar with mr boop, and if you arent theres really nothing i can say other than Please give it a shot, but if you havent been keeping up with alecs work since then you might not be as familiar with his current project crimehot. and thats a damn shame because it is all the comedy, unabashed horniness, and surprisingly understated storytelling of mr boop taken to its absolute max.

crimehot is set in a future where nearly every aspect of human life and culture is controlled by an all-powerful all-seeing computer algorithm. but who cares about all that when theres a ragtag team of ultra sexy ultra horny master thieves going on wacky little misadventures together!

alecs style is blunt and simplistic in a way that comes off as juvenile at first glance, and then uses that presumption to completely blindside you with its actual content, reminding me weirdly enough of memeable classic tails gets trolled. in spite of their potential as works of ironic comedy however alecs comics really give me this impression of total earnestness. crimehot in particular is so blatantly un-erotic, with its complete lack of any subtlety, comically exaggerated (and surprisingly diagetic) anatomy, and impossible physical positions, that it circles back around into becoming, indeed, kind of hot. i think silliness can be hot so sue me!

blind alley by adam de souza

departing completely from my last couple recs, blind alley is a cozy, peanuts-inspired comic strip about the day to day lives of the children of blind alley. its also occasionally a deeply unsettling horror-mystery that has just barely begun to show its hand more than two years in. its distinguishing factor to me comes from the fact that the cozy exterior doesnt seem to be there to conceal or divert your attention away from the growing sense of unease that infiltrates its panels on an increasingly frequent basis as the story progresses. it feels more like the two elements live side by side, horror and mundanity, otherworldly creatures and secret conspiracies living peacefully alongside lazy summer afternoons and goofing off with your friends. it perfectly captures the anxiety of knowing that theres something the grown-ups arent telling you, the powerlessness of being a kid.

blind alley feels to me sort of like if those "what if Nostalgic Cartoon was secretly DARK" media theories were actually real, and actually scary. i might be getting ahead of myself as the series likes to take its time and is really only just starting to peel back the layers, but what ive read so far feels makes me feel like this could be something very special.

boy island by leo fox

beautiful beautiful beautiful first of all. the dreamy, surreal visuals? the colors?? oujhjh.. boy island is set in a world split violently in two, divided into boy island and girl island, and surrounded on all sides by a sea of monsters mutants and ghosts, those sorry souls who committed the trespass of trying to cross from one land to the other, or even live outside of either! a boy named lucille must strike out on his own to make it to boy island, but in doing so begins to discover things about the world and in fact himself that reveal an even greater mission.

im making this all sound very dramatic. its a trans story. its about trans people, being trans. its also about surviving the ripples of a world laid out for you by your parents, managing grief for the ones that didnt, and a funny little blue guy named jounce. also did i mention its gorgeous? hot fuckin diggity it is gooorgeous.

vivians ghost by hal schrieve (18+)

speaking of trans comics!! (plot twist: theyre all trans comics suckerrrr) look, all of hals comics are fucking baller and im sure the book zes got coming out will be too, but ive like Imprinted on this one. its attached itself my brain. much like the main protagonist collin has been attached to by his suicide victim best friend and ex highschool bf viv!

the sketchy art style threw me off at first but it quickly becomes part of the charm and meshes very well with the chaotic pace and gutpunch emotional moments. theres a strong element of magical realism that i honestly think comics as a medium were made for. viv is a ghost, and viv is grief, and guilt, and fantasy, and shame, and glorious trans revenge taken form, and hes not even the only apparition in this story, taking the stage alongside cameos by jesus christ, a detransitioners fursona, almanda palmer, and (checks notes) gonzo for a second there i think.

as a disclaimer (or incentive, depending) no one in this story i think is someone you could really call a good person. some of them are in fact plainly terrible. they are all so undeniably fucking fascinating though. and viv himself gleefully inhabits that moral gray area, deliberately and loudly disturbing any image of himself as a pure perfect victim, blurring lines and thrusting both the characters and audience out of their comfort zone. its a challenging read thats not going to be everyone for sure, but i definitely think its worth the read.

(and if this sounds interesting to you but youre not sure you can handle it, hal has other equally good comics that are still heavy on the trans gay relationship drama but much lighter on the childhood trauma.)

what happens next by maximumgraves

if youre reading this on tumblr i hope that youve at least heard of what happens next by now. thee seminal tumblrina art of our time i swear. it starts with a true crime podcast exploring the strange story of griffin and his accomplice milo, trans teen murderers, the latter of which has since been released from the psych hospital while the former continues to serve his sentence. but thats in the past, and in the present milo still has to figure out how to live the rest of his life.

the story moves rapidly, though not necessarily chronologically, in and out of the real world and the online lives its characters frequently inhabit like its guiding you through a twisted dream. its a comic on the internet about the internet from someone clearly well aware of its more poisonous aspects, as well as the addictive quality it can have for someone who has become otherwise isolated from the world.

at the end of the day though the major appeal i think is the characters, how messy and horrible and tragic they can be, which is all you can really hope for from a largely character-driven narrative. to say much more i think would ruin the experience, but ill say what happens next absolutely delivers on its ominous title, and im waiting on the edge of my seat for the next chapter.

preeny has to repeat 6th grade by momodriller

on a Much lighter note, preeny has to repeat 6th grade is a super cute adventure series about a magical little kitty named preeny who on her first day of sixth grade is called upon to go on a great mission. its a sparklefur comic!! ive been really starting to dive into furry art lately, and if youre the kind of person who raises an eyebrow at that statement, fine, whatever, but im talking to the cool people right now so keep it to yourself.

art from within the furry subculture is such insanely creative and passionate stuff, and the focus on this subset in particular, calling back to the early 2000s deviantart xD rAWR s0 rand0m era of online culture, feels so intensely nostalgic it makes my chest ache, despite never being heavily involved in the sparklefur scene myself.

the author states in the comics description that the story takes inspiration from her experiences as an autistic child, and even before reading that man i felt it. what really makes this comic unique to me though is that the majority of characters that appear are based on adoptables the author purchased off of, as she puts it, the children of deviantart. i LOVE that. not only is that probably amazing for the kids, it makes every character feel truly unique and adds perfectly to the overall flavor of the world shes created. there is just not another comic i can think of that feels alive like this one.

broccoli soup by secretpie

ok so i know how we might feel about webtoon comics but hear me out. broccoli soup is probably the first comic ive seen to really exploit the otherwise sort of bland and restrictive format of webtoons, utilizing the excess of white space to enhance the feeling of emptiness that characterizes the protagonist broccoli's time in the blank void they call home as well as to make the sparse use of color really pop in contrast.

broccoli soup is a mysterious series thats a little hard to pin down in terms of genre. a strange little being named broccoli spends their days in a vast blankness drinking tea with their loving yet highly suspicious Best Friend and benefactor, doris. doris has the ability to move between worlds, coming and going as she pleases, while broccoli is only allowed to leave when they are on a mission on her behalf. these missions vary, but the goal is always the same: make everything Polite and Good.

as the story progresses, little by little more friends and more color come into broccolis still new existence. the art style also changes from world to world, which imo is a very nice touch. and! theres music! its an interesting project that dances back and forth between fantastical whimsy and some surprisingly dark moments. and thats the shit i like to see.

thats all for now! though if im lucky there will be many more fun stories and projects to talk about in the future. keep in mind as well that this is like barely half of all the webcomics im currently reading, just the ones that most stick out to me as really doing something special.

until next time yall!!

oh wait sike honorable mentions time

awful hospital by bogleech

the only reason this isnt up there with the rest is bc im woefully behind at the moment. ill get back to it eventually! awful hospital is an interactive multimedia horror-comedy webcomic about a hospital that is. well this hospital is simply sub-par to say the least.

hedgehog's dilemma by mellodilla

this ones still a little new to say much on but so far it looks like a cute series. what most appeals to me is that the art style looks like something that fit in seamlessly with an early 90s newspaper comic strip. in particular it has a strong calvin and hobbes vibe to me. just, you know, about wacky lil lesbian animals living their lives.

ok now im done for real

*for clarity's sake, im using webcomic here to mean "a series of comics that was first published and predominantly exists online" so even if a print version exists, i still consider it to be first and foremost a webcomic. this also includes comics that contain a multimedia or interactive element. if its a combination of pictures and words to tell a story, its a comic.

also my list is probably going to end up massively favoring serialized fiction because thats just what i like to read, but i dont necessarily think thats a required element.

#ungodly screeching #recommendations #kinda off topic but also kinda not lol #this got way out of hand #oh also if i got anyones pronouns wrong pls let me know! i tried to track everyones down

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talknerdytome67-blog · 6 years ago

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Loss

What did it mean that there were no handbooks for me? That people asked me to be strong in the face of the biggest loss I'd ever experienced or imagined? At times I felt like I didn't deserve to feel so shattered, especially in the shadow of my parents' immense loss but losing a twin is like losing half of yourself.

When I was 22, my twin brother, who was my only sibling, died. He had huffed duster while driving resulting in immediate brain death causing him to hit a tree at over 90mph. That day wasnt like any other day because a few months earlier I woke up and knew he was going to die. Just not how or when. The day the phone rang and I heard my mom say dark, foreign words like car accident, unresponsive, drugs, life support was the most impactful day of my life. In the thickness of shock, I didn't realize that the rest of my life would be measured in before and after. Before, when my family was intact. After, when I would somehow be forced to learn to live without the person I was supposed to get a lifetime with.

"Be strong for your parents," said blurs of people at Trevor's memorial service. I nodded, but inside me, something twisted. I stood in a daze as people streamed by, offering their awkward words and hugs. Be strong for your parents? I thought. How can I be strong for them when half my soul just died and I dont even know how to be strong for myself.

After

I was barely breathing. I was barely standing there. I was numb and strong was the last thing I felt. One thing is for sure I felt angry at my brother for leaving me here. For abandoning me. It's funny how I found myself consoling complete strangers over the death of my brother and yet these very people werent there for him when he was alive and struggling w addiction. Why is it that no one seems to truly care about you until tragedy strikes and then suddenly your life meant so much to them. They say things like "I didn't see this coming" "Why didn't they reach out"

In the early months after Trevors death at 22, I existed in a heavy fog. Nothing was as I knew it. I'd been forced to abandon the little life I'd once known. My friends were living their lives -- going to college, working, falling in and out of love and lust. Meanwhile, my life had stopped and I no longer recognized the world around me.

My home was filled with the cloying scent of flowers just starting to die. It struck me just then how terrible it was that we send flowers to the grieving -- here you go, another reminder that nothing is permanent, that everything lovely will be lost.

My brother's absence was heavy in the house. Though he had died in Peoria, his room was still scattered with relics: the bed he had slept in for so many years, his skateboarding hoodies hanging like shadows in the closets, a handful of videos and books. Memories pinned to each corner. His beloved Ferret Ember waiting for her best friend who was never coming home.

Having always taken comfort in words, I scoured the internet for a book for someone like me -- a barely adult whose (barely) adult twin brother had died. What I found was unimpressive: There were more books on losing a pet than losing a brother or sister, especially a twin. A few books existed for surviving children after a death in the family, but they were for small children. One memoir documented a sister's grief following her brother's death, but it was out of print.

A few weeks later, I found out I was pregnant and my world took another 360* hit. I decided I needed to join a support group so I sat in a circle with a few widows and widowers, a woman whose daughter had died, and a woman whose mother had died. I was younger than any of them by at least 30 years, but I could relate to their shares: "I feel like I'm going crazy." "I'm so damned angry right now." "I can't sleep at night." "My anxiety is at an all time high"

Though the losses were different, the feelings were the same and we were all barely coping.

My parents, who adopted us at 2 would never be the same. Their pain was almost visible, as if a piece of their bodies had been cut out. I had lost myself, too, or at least the version of me that was unscathed by tragedy: an innocent version, who walked around in some parallel universe where her brother was still alive, ignorant to the incredible fortune of an entirely alive family.

My brother, my twin, my built in best friend. I miss Trevors big brown eyes. His loud laugh. He was the co-keeper of my childhood and my secret's. The person who was supposed to walk with me longer than anyone else in this life. The only other person who knew what it was like to grow up with our particular parents, in our particular home and our particular situation being adopted.

The future.

I cried for the nephews and nieces I would never have. I cried for my own daughter who would never know my brother, her uncle. How would I explain him? How would I ensure that his essence wasn't lost, that he wasn't just a figure in old photographs, a handful of stories? Suddenly i was the only person who could make my parents the grandparents they were soon to be.

I constantly grieve for all the hard times ahead when my brother wouldn't be by my side. When my parents begin to age. When my grandparents die. There would be no one to share these dark milestones with and no one to comfort me in the way he did with just his presence.

And so 3 weeks after his death Im now pregnant and despite feeling like I wanted to die from the pain and loneliness i had to stay alive. I suddenly was needing to stay healthy, to stay safe, to stay positive because I was bringing a beautiful baby girl into the world and theres no time to fall apart.

So I placed my grief on hold.

I felt like our family had been a four-legged table, and one leg had suddenly been torn off. The remaining three of us wobbled and teetered. We felt the missing leg like an amputee, each morning waking to the horrible fact that Trevor was gone and unable to stop the pain.

I wrote letters to my brother in those early months and years. At first, memories blazed through my head and I used the letters to capture them before they flitted away, gone forever: my brother walking towards me when he knew my heart had been broken and embracing me in a giant hug. The time I taught him to make snow angels in the front yard of our home, our bulkily clad limbs sliding in synchronicity under the cold afternoon sun.

Later, I wrote the letters when I needed to cry -- when the grief sat coiled and waiting in my chest, needing to be let out, released. I couldn't find the words of other bereaved twin sisters or brothers to bring me comfort, so I created my own.

One day, when I was lost in my sadness, my mom said, "You won't always feel like this. You'll have a family of your own. You'll move on." This seemed impossible in my 23 year-old new mom skin. I couldn't imagine this potential future where I lived a life my brother was no longer apart of.

But very, very slowly, I began putting my life back together. I gave birth to a gorgeous baby girl and I made the difficult decision to leave an abusive relationship and return home again. As time has gone on I notice my daughter has his love of music and animals and possesses the lighthearted spirit my brother had at the same age and I cant help but smile and think a part of him is in her.

Sometimes adult siblings aren't able to close the distance between them, all those shared experiences and time and space and relationships matter. They tether us, they twine our stories together. I pray that my children will one day remain close as they grow, and that they enjoy a long lifetime together and never take eachother for granted.

After nearly 9 years, the sharp shock and grief I felt in those early months and years are no longer constant but only come back in waves, especially around his angelversary or our birthday. It's hard to explain to people the survivors guilt I feel and the PTSD I acquired from watching him struggle to pass away after being taken off life support. It's hard to explain to people that the week of his death never gets easier to face and I tend to shut down and shut people out because I dont want to be a burden. I distance myself so my sadness doesnt spill into their lives.

Its taken 9 years for the pain to dull and for the words "your brother is dead" to stop pounding in my head -- but they did. Trevors absence is mostly a dull hurt, the ghost of an old broken bone that aches when it rains. I feel it more on holidays and anniversaries, when someone else close to me dies. Or when something funny happens and I go to text him and realize I cant. Because Hes gone.

I'll always wish he was still here. I'll always wonder what he would look like and what he'd be doing if he was still alive -- at almost 32, At 50. At 75. Who would he be today? Would he have gotten sober and started a family? Would his music career had taken off?

So with no other choice I continue on. Perhaps I am even strong, like those well-meaning mourners at my brother's memorial asked me to be. But my brother's loss will remain with me for my whole life -- just like he was supposed to.

I wish I knew how to explain to the people I love that the distance I create during anniversaries is done so they are not effected by my overwhelming sadness. I create distance because even after 9 years I am still learning how to cope and handle my grief and sometimes its easier to do alone so that theres no pressure to feel like you have to be happy and in a way continue healing.

I'm incredibly blessed with an amazing boyfriend who is patient and kind and incredibly handsome and perfect in every way. He has been incredibly understanding and supportive despite the distance I have placed between us lately and that's how I know hes who I am going to spend the rest of my life with if he'll let me.

I will forever be thankful for the time I had with my brother and the lessons he taught me but time doesn't heal all wounds and I am just finding ways to get by.

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groundramon · 7 years ago

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Good meme references are references that are funny without any meme attached and are reminiscent of how the meme first came into popularity, or references that may not even be meme references and I’m overanalyzing this.

Like I’m just saying this scene is really funny and its 100% understandable without any knowledge of the internet’s (former?) tendency to say “halp” instead of “help”. I realize “halp” was never really a meme but I still count it because hearing a show say “its lit, fam” would hurt me just as much as the infamous “NO ME GUSTA” scene in the PPG reboot. (then again, hearing people say “its lit fam” on the internet hurts me as well but i digress)

The reason this scene works is because it puts the “meme” back in its original context. Whatever made the original meme funny makes it funny here. I really dont know how you’d be able to do that with something like the cheating boyfriend meme (or other, older visual memes like no me gusta), word-based memes could be replicated. Like if there was a stoner (or not stoner, but is joked about being a stoner) character who looked at a Hawaiian print shirt and was like “is that a weed leaf” a character responding with “ITS NOT FUCKING WEED YOU PIECE OF SHIT STONER” could potentially be funny. It works because it flows with the story/dialogue. Like that’s a really specific example but that’s because memes are extremely specific and that’s why 99/100 attempts at meme references in pop culture fail. It’s not even because of the timing tbh, but the timing doesnt help. Fidget Spinners are still a relevant meme/pop culture but I nearly broke my tv when what I THOUGHT was an innocent disney channel sitcom/live action show referenced them. Then again that might be just because I have a loathing of fidget spinners except when being used to stim and that show definitely wasnt using them to stim. Like ive always had that (going into the isles near the checkouts at general stores is fucking horrible) so maybe this is a bad example. But in any case, the context is what matters (and tbh the context in the show was...fine. Fidget Spinners are being used by kids at the moment and it was being used by a kid and her young mother. Whatever. Its fine. Fuck everything.)

Like if you had a character say “hewwow?” after calling for their friends a couple times, and then all the sudden their friend runs up and bonks them on the head, that could be funny depending on the timing and context. You’re putting it in its original context - a misconstruction of “hello?” meant to annoy your friends.

//shrugs// im reading wayyyy too much into this. Just avoid memes in pop culture. Just do it. They dont mix.

#stormy speaks #analysis

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1-800-letsgonap · 7 years ago

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All of the odd questions from ready set sex

omg anon i love you hahaha here we go...

1. Are looks important in a relationship?

Yes but not in the traditional sense, looks should matter to the individual. Dress to make yourself happy

3. Are you a virgin?

lol no

5. Are you in love?

nopeee

7. Can you commit to one person?

yessss

9. Describe your perfect mate

theyd be funny, charming, good hearted, unbelievably accepting, forgiving, patient, and they would never fart in my room ever.

11. Do you ever want to get married?

yesssss

13. Do you get jealous easily?

omg yes its actually annoying lol my bad

15. Do you have any piercings?

i have my eyebrow pierced

17. Do you like kissing in public?

mhmmmm

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?

lol no, but maybe one day!

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?

yeah

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?

idk if thats the best thing for me, but if i found someone who could be supportive for me then maybe

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?

not that i know of

29. Have you ever cheated on someone?

...yes, my bad...

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?

literally always

33. Have you ever had sex with a man?

yes

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

yes

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

no, my friends need to approve or i wont date you.

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

lol hi have you met me??

41. Have you had sex so far this year?tech no...i think lol

43. How long was your longest relationship?like 9 months maybe

45. How many people did you kiss in 2011?how the fuck am i supposed to remember that lmao

47. How old are you?twenty fiivee

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?

lol single as a pringleeee

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?

yeah but thats just bc i love my friends more than i love being alive

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?lol nobody cares who im talking to bc im single as fuck

55. Share a relationship story.my first serious gf i brought to a family wedding and it was really cool to feel accepted....i then proceeded to ruin the night as usual but like...lol details

57. Things you want to say to an ex“You always made me feel like I was the problem, and maybe I was...but you were too”

59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)lol too lazy but ill post a selfie before work tm i promise

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?

whether or not they laugh at my jokes

63. What is your definition of “having sex”?if im with a guy his business is in mine, if im with a girl her mouth or hands are in my business

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?

its been too long i dont even care anymore lol how sad

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?honestly the perfect date would be someone managing to make me food that ill actually eat, and then having them read to me.......

69. What turns you off?

when people are sensative fuckholes who dont laugh at my jokes

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?lol dont really have one sorryyy

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?hide reminders for me to eat around my room or something...

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?lol nobodys really done anything nearly as sweet for me as i have for them...like just being honest

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?

honestly at this point it doesnt really matter to me nmw, like do you

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?i dont remember

81. Who are five people you find attractive?my friend dan, cara delivgine, taylor momsen, kristen stewart, harry styles

83. Who was your first kiss with?kid named cory

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?yeah but if they didnt visit me id be bouncing right the fuck out of that

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trendingnewsb · 7 years ago

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Aisling Bea: My fathers death has given me a love of men, of their vulnerability and tenderness

The comedians father killed himself when she was three. She was plagued by the fact he made no mention of her or her sister in the letter he left. Then, 30 years after his death, a box arrived

My father died when I was three years old and my sister was three months. For years, we thought he had died of some sort of back injury a story that we had never really investigated because we were just too busy with the Spice Girls and which one we were (I was a Geri/Mel B mix FYI). Then, on the 10th anniversary of his death, my mother sat us down and explained the concept of suicide. Sure, we knew about suicide. At 13, I had already known of too many young men from our town who had taken their own lives. Spoken about as inexplicable sadnesses for the families, spoken about but never really talked about terrible tragedy nobody knows why he did it. What we had not known until that day, was that our father had, 10 years beforehand, also taken his own life.

When I was growing up, I idolised my father. I thought his ghost followed me around the house. I had been told how he adored me, how I was funny, just like him. Because of our lovely Catholic upbringing, I secretly assumed that he would eventually come back, like our good friend Jesus.

My mother, being the wonder woman that she is, never held his death against him. When she looked into his coffin, she felt she saw the face of the man she had married: his stress lines had gone, he seemed free of the sadness that had been dogging him of late. But it was still tough for her to talk about. She didnt want to have to explain to a stranger in the middle of a party how he was not defined by his ending, but how loved he was, how cherished the charismatic, handsome vet in a small town had been. She didnt want his whole person being judged.

Once she had told us, I did not want to talk about him. Ever again. I now hated him. He had not been taken from us, he had left. His suicide felt like the opposite of parenting. Abandonment. Selfishness. Taking us for granted.

I didnt care that he had not been in his right mind, because if I had been important enough to him I would have put him back into his right mind before he did it. I didnt care that he had been in chronic pain and that men in Ireland dont talk about their feelings, so instead die of sadness. I didnt want him at peace. I wanted him struggling, but alive, so he could meet my boyfriends and give them a hard time, like in American movies. I wanted him to come to pick me up from discos, so my mother didnt have to go out alone in her pyjamas at night to get me.

I look like him. For all of my teens and early 20s, I smothered my face in fake tan and bleached my hair blond so that elderly relatives would stop looking at me like I was the ghost of Christmas past whenever I did something funny. You look so like your father, they would say. And as much as people might think a teenage girl wants to be told that she looks like a dead man, she doesnt.

Aisling Bea with her father. Photograph: Aisling Bea

And then there was the letter.

My mother gave us the letter to read the day she told us, but, in it, he didnt mention my sister or me.

I had not been adored. He had forgotten we existed. I didnt believe it at first. When I was 15, I took the letter out of my mothers Filofax and used the photocopying machine at my summer job to make a copy so I could really examine it. Like a CSI detective, I stared at it, desperate to see if there had been a trace of the start of an A anywhere.

I would often fantasise that, if I ever killed myself, I would write a letter to every single person I had ever met, explaining why I was doing it. Every. Single. Person. Right down to the lad I struck up a conversation with once in a chip shop and the girl I met at summer camp when I was 12. No one would be left thinking: Why? I would be very non-selfish about it. When Facebook came in, I thought: Well, this will save me a fortune on stamps.

Sometimes, in my less lucid moments, I was convinced that he had left a secret note for me somewhere. Maybe, on my 16th no, 18th no, 21st no, 30th birthday, a letter would arrive, like in Back to the Future. Aisling, I wanted to wait until you were old enough to understand. I was secretly a spy. That is why I did it. I love you. I love your sister, too. PS Heaven is real, your philosophy essay is wrong and I am totally still watching over you. Stop shoplifting.

This summer was the 30th anniversary of his death. In that time, a few things have happened that have radically changed how I feel.

Three years ago, Robin Williams took his own life. He was my comedy hero, my TV dad he had always reminded my mother of my father and his death spurred me to finally start opening up. I had always found it so hard to talk about. I think I had been afraid that if I ever did, my soul would fall out of my mouth and I would never get it back in again.

Last year, I watched Grayson Perrys documentary All Man. It featured a woman whose son had ended his life. She thought that he probably hadnt wanted to die for ever, just on that day, when he had been in so much pain. A lightbulb moment it had never occurred to me that maybe suicide had seemed like the best option in that hour. In my head, my father had taken a clear decision, as my parent, to opt out for ever.

My father had always seemed like an adult making adult decisions, but I suddenly found myself at almost his age, still feeling like a giant child. I looked at some of my male friends gorgeous idiots doing their gorgeous, idiotic best to bring up little daughters, just like he would have been.

Finally, just after my 30th birthday, a box turned up.

The miserable people he had worked for had found a box of his things filed away and rang my mother (30 years later) wondering whether she wanted them or whether they should just throw them in the bin.

She waited for us to fly home and we opened it together three little women staring into an almost-abandoned cardboard box.

Now, most of the box was horse ultrasounds which, Ill be honest, I am not into. But there was also his handwriting around the edges and, then, underneath the horse X-rays and files, there were the photographs.

Any child who has lost a parent probably knows every single photograph in existence of that parent. I had pored over them all, trying to put together the person he might have been.

The photos in the box had been collected from his desk after he had died. We had never seen them before. They were nearly all of me. He had had all of these photos stuck on his desk. I was probably the last thing he looked at before he died.

My fathers death has given me a lot. It has given me a lifelong love of women, of their grittiness and hardness traits that we are not supposed to value as feminine. It has also given me a love of men, of their vulnerability and tenderness traits that we do not foster as masculine or allow ourselves to associate with masculinity.

To Daddy, here is my note to you:

Im sad you killed yourself, because I really think that, if you could see the life you left behind, you would regret it. You didnt get to see the Berlin wall fall or Ireland qualify for Italia 90. You didnt get to see all the encyclopedias that you bought for us to one day use at university get squashed into a CD and subsequently the internet. You have never got to hear your younger daughters voice it annoys me sometimes, but it has also said some of the most amazing things when drunk. I think you would have been proud to watch your daughter do standup at the O2 and sad to see my mother watching it on her own. Then again, if you hadnt died, I probably wouldnt have been mad enough to become a clown for a living. I am your daughter and I am really fucking funny, just like you. But, unlike you, Im going to stop being it for five minutes and write our story in the hope that it may help someone who didnt get to have a box turn up, or who may not feel in their right mind right now and needs a reminder to find hope. Aisling

In the UK, the Samaritans can be contacted on 116 123. In the US, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255. In Australia, the crisis support service Lifeline is on 13 11 14. Other international suicide helplines can be found at befrienders.org

Read more: http://ift.tt/2hEbtos

from Viral News HQ http://ift.tt/2iq7Wui via Viral News HQ

#IFTTT #Viral News HQ

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shg11 · 7 years ago

Link

The comedians father killed himself when she was three. She was plagued by the fact he made no mention of her or her sister in the letter he left. Then, 30 years after his death, a box arrived

Aisling Bea with her father. Photograph: Aisling Bea

And then there was the letter.

My mother gave us the letter to read the day she told us, but, in it, he didnt mention my sister or me.

This summer was the 30th anniversary of his death. In that time, a few things have happened that have radically changed how I feel.

Finally, just after my 30th birthday, a box turned up.

She waited for us to fly home and we opened it together three little women staring into an almost-abandoned cardboard box.

Any child who has lost a parent probably knows every single photograph in existence of that parent. I had pored over them all, trying to put together the person he might have been.

To Daddy, here is my note to you:

Read more: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/nov/04/aisling-bea-my-fathers-death-has-given-me-a-love-of-men-of-their-vulnerability-and-tenderness

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kickstarter-promotion · 8 years ago

Photo

Another Amazing Kickstarter (Taking Midnight Runners Graphic Novels next lvl!! by John Hanna —Kickstarter) has been published on http://crowdmonsters.com/new-kickstarters/taking-midnight-runners-graphic-novels-next-lvl-by-john-hanna-kickstarter/

A NEW KICKSTARTER IS LAUNCHED:

I’ve been drawing comics for a number of years now, just selling them to friends and family and in the local convention scene. As I make more stories and visit more cons, this begins to get expensive! And honestly, I dont want to be confined to just conventions forever. I want as many people as possible to read my stories and enjoy them! So I need the resources to keep me going and spread my stories out to the world!

MY PLAN!!

The goals I’m looking to achieve in this kickstarter are: 1) covering print production costs for a large run of my entire comics collection 2) distribution of comics by post to Literary Agents in Australia and overseas in order to find a Publisher 3) cover costs to visit the cons this year

FINDING A PUBLISHER

The main goal here is to find a Publisher. I’m not intending to be famous and rich or anything, I’m not concerned with that, and its unlikely to happen in the comic world. What I want is for as many people as possible to read my stories! The ultimate way for that to happen is to find a publisher who will make my work(s) commercially available to the country and the world. But you can’t just go up to a publisher and go ‘hey, publish this yo!’, theres way too many people who do that and they’re always swamped with a billion manuscripts, so it super unlikely that they would ever have the chance to see it. What you need is a Literary Agent!

A Literary Agent has contacts in the publishing world, and will petition for ones story to be taken on by a Publisher. It’s like having a go-between who vouches for you. Not only is a Literary Agent easier to find, but they will do all the heavy lifting for you once they decide to take you on. Getting an agent involves sending out copies of my comics to them all over the country/world and if just one of them likes one of my stories, I’m in! whoop whoop!

So basically, I’m gonna need a whole lotta copies of my comics so I can send them out all over the place! And that of course means $$$

Getting my convention on!

GOING TO CONVENTIONS

I tend to frequent as many conventions in NSW as I can, though I’d like to someday travel interstate, and eventually overseas. I often attend 6-8 conventions a year generally, selling my stuff and drawing on the spot commissions! As you can imagine, this can get expensive… Not all the cons are cheap to table at, and theres additional costs with travel expenses and accomodation if events are far away. It’s not like I make a million dollars doing these things so often I’m lucky if I break even. This can become a money pit which for most artists I know, is a struggle, and often can be the breaking point at which they continue drawing comics or give up. It happens too often and personally, I don’t want that to happen to me. So I need to make this sustainable.

This year will be a little more quiet than usual, as I have a lot going on in my personal life currently, but the cons I’m intending to attend this year are: * Wollongong Comic Gong – 13th May * Supanova – 16-18th June * Smash -19-20th August * Gamma Con – 5-6th August

Hopefully with your help I can reach a wider more broader audience and take my comics to the next level!

WHAT COMICS?

I currently have 5 stories which I’ve self published. I have many others, but these ones are the best and most polished at this time. They range from true stories to romance to action to sci-fi. Though I’ll admit most of them are romance stories lol and funny enough they’re all inspired by my personal life in some way…

JUST YOU AND ME – 1 volume – 300pgs

Just You & Me

One day about 10 years ago I was going through all my old stuff and found the diary I had kept in year 11, about this crazy love triangle I was involved in. Flicking through it I laughed, I cried, felt all fuzzy inside and I reminisced, thinking ‘damn this would make a great soap opera or something’ which is when I thought, ‘why don’t I draw a comic of it?’ First attempt at drawing a comic since I was 13yo. So 5 years and 300 pages later ‘Just You & Me’ was born.

300pgs of true high school experience

MY GIRLFRIEND THE SECRET AGENT – 3 volumes – 164pgs

My Girlfriend The Secret Agent

Internet dating and secret agents! One of my best stories to date, and its also one of the more polished. This is really where I perfected my art style, and stepped up my characters and story development. Exciting and heart-wrenching at the same time, this is one comic i’m most proud of!

All sorts of action goes on in love and war!

SURVIVAL OF THE LOLEETEST – 3 volumes – 55pgs

Survival of the Loleetest

I was really poor for a number of years, and couldn’t afford to get my friend anything for her birthday, so what did I do? I drew a comic about her. Every birthday I would continue the story until a number of years ago when I reached its conclusion (i finally had a decent job by then). She’s a Lolita, and this is inspired by an interaction between her friends and some Bronies they encountered one day. This is truly a BRONIE vs LOLITA GRUDGEMATCH and it has one of the best conclusions in any of the my comics.

Though this is all about lolitas and bronies, this doesnt pull any punches!

MACHINE//HEART – 2 out of 3 volumes completed – 145pgs currently

Machine//Heart

This is a current sci-fi, 3 part series that I’m doing, of which vol 2. is almost complete. It tackles the ideas of identity and what makes you, you. Robots, mystery, multinational corporations, danger and death feature heavily here. Story and characters wise – this is the most ambitious story that i’ve attempted. Its actually not a romance (crazy, right?), and has turned out to be a con favourite, nearly selling out of my years worth print run in a single con! Will have an awesome and epic conclusion that unfortunately you’ll have to wait for!

Vol 1 is complete, Vol 2 is on the verge on completion, with Vol 3 in development due to be complete beginning of next year

FUNK BUDDIES – 1 volume – 40pgs

Funk Buddies

Theres a funny story behind this one, which is too long to write here, but it’s my first attempt at a hentai (if you opt in on this one, i tell the story in the authors notes). It’s still in production but will be complete once this kickstarter has reached its end. Most of the book design is complete, with only a small number of finished art pages to be done, then screentones and typesetting. I HAVE to have a story and I HAVE to have characters, so it’s not just blatant pornography. This is my first attempt at this kind of material and actually something i’m very proud of! haha I’m certain that it will get anybody off 😉 Due to its erotic nature, I can’t really reveal much about it here tho, sorry :/

As you can see, Funk buddies is still in development, but will be ready once the kickstarter is complete

REWARDS

When choosing hard copies of any of the comics in the rewards, the ‘Hard copy of comic of your choice’ reward, you can choose any individual volumes of any of the stories (excluding Just You & Me). With the ‘Hard copy of any comic series of your choice’, these are the multi volumes stories and includes Just You & Me.

Obviously with the higher tier rewards where I illustrate a comic written by you, have your story ready to go so i can get it out to you as fast as possible. Possibly due to demand there could be a delay from the promised June deadline, but obviously I’ll be keepin you in the loop!

CONCLUSION

Any of these take your fancy? Back me and help make my dreams reality and score some sweet comics!!

Risks and challenges

I self-publish all my comics so the danger of success is always a thin line, as all the costs incurred are paid by myself. If I dont sell enough or my costs are too high, I’m the one who suffers. And if comics are not sustainable then all I’m doing is throwing money out the window. But so far… I’ve done alright! My first 2 years of doing cons, I ran a massive deficit and was almost ready to give up. But I persevered and cut costs and made it work, and the last number of years I’ve broke even! This alone is not enough to get ahead, which is why I’ve come to kickstarter.

I’m a graphic designer by trade, so I do everything (except printing and binding – which i used to do myself) from illustration, design and typesetting all myself. The person I need to rely on here is me. I’ve self published over 1000 pages of comics, so I’m more than qualified for the task of realising this project. I’m fast too, so getting out backer rewards within the June timeframe should easily achieveable, as long as life doesn’t get in the way, but being that you’ve trusted me enough with your pledge, I wont let anything get in the way!!

Other than my finished works, I have a bunch of stories which are still in development, but only two of which will be ready in time for this Kickstarter (being Machine//Heart vol 2, and Funk Buddies). They will be finished by the time this Kickstarter has been completed and are a part of the rewards available to backers. Machine//Heart Vol 3 is still in the writing phase, and will be available to the top tier backers once it’s completed at the beginning of next year (so please be patient with that one!)

If I don’t succeed here, my convention efforts this year will be severely crippled and my dreams of being published pushed back another year. So helping any way that you can will mean a great deal to me!

Learn about accountability on Kickstarter

INFORMATION PROVIDED BY Kickstarter.com and Kicktraq.com VISIT PAGE SOURCE

#graphic #Hanna #John #Kickstarter #lvl #Midnight #Novels #Runners

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sherlockedmindblown-blog · 8 years ago

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THEFINALPROBLEM

‪Im angry for all those who see things which arent there..So i have to write it this way, 140 letters its not enough..its called FRIENDSHIP,not ur fantasy.. I have gay friends and i love them, I am all for LGBT rights,marriages,adoptions and everything so dont try make me a homophobe..Dont be so feisty and offensive..I am a huge fan of tv shows, i saw more than 200 shows, now i activly watching over 100 through the year, so I am bot specialist, but I have my opinion and kind of huge base to build on, cause i saw a lot..And i am also a shipper, so I get that..But the whole team who make #Sherlock (and they are doing some pretty pretty good and brilliant job) they cant make every shipper happy..And I know the world is trying ti change and be open and welcoming to gay people, and its right that way, cause we are all same...But u have to keep your reason and logic and whole thinking together..At first with your attitude they will didnt care about us and there will be no other season, and maybe for all u showing it would be deserved cause u are ungratefull and mean..Sorry u can ripped ne apart but I stand by my opinion and I will give you arguments why..Maybe some of you will understand..‬ ‪In every show u always find ur favorite, and ur shipping..And sometimes it happens and sometimes dont..I get it that u imagine yourswlf on Sherlocka or John place or imagine them as a dreamy oerfect couple which u want to live someday with someone in ur future..They change a lot and make a SPECTACULAR SHOW from old classic..But u want too much and u see things which are clearly not there..There is line between friendship and love. Of course u or i imagine that we change oyr crush to gay or straight or whatever it doesnt matter..But there is clearly totally different story.Not because creators want to make you mad amd furious and filling internet with these crap and throwing a lots of shit on their brilliant work..‬ ‪U dont not anymore concentrate on story..TRY TO THINK..please just try it with me..‬ ‪If ur wish would be fullfill hiw it would looks like abd what would happen with Sherlock, with show we all love and worship???‬ ‪So imagine it with me: ‬ ‪Theyre on a case, so much intense drama like always, everything we love...And in the middle of that they would be holding hands and showing their love and pride to whole world, in this case to whole London...And they would kiss or cuddle in Sherlock chair, or go on a date or whatever John going out of Sherlocks bedroom making him breakfest in the morning..I get it and I dont blame u that u are shipping this and see u in some way at their place...If I will be honest to u, maybe it will help, I imagine myself worh Sherlock so i dont want him with Mollt, Adler or John, dont care about gender..But I am reasonable intelligent person and I dont excpected this happy end for me( i know Sherlock is not real person, i am not crazy..) and I am totally "in love" (we cam call it in love probably) with Benedict Cumberbatch (I wasnt since the beggining, i actually wondering for two years why is whole world so swoon by him..I didnt saw it..I was so blind and stupid, now i get it maybe too much) but it doesnt change anything about that i love the show and i am very excited for what creators bring us and if they hive us more(please we want moooore) and if they give u ur happy ending Sherlock&John=❤❤❤ The biggest world love..That would totally ruin the whole show. It would become a totally different show which would many of us dont wanna watch, not because we are antigay or homophobic or whatever bullshit u will tell me, but because it would be wrong..They would instead of solving case solving they partership and problems in theirs relationship from why didnt u take out garbage to why did u cheated on me..So it would become a show about gay guys living in London splving specially their relationship because its aleays like that when partners work together..And usually they dont solve cases like that and dont get inti situation nearly close to this...So i u want Sherlock (if it ever will be another season, its in stars, but i believe in creators team that they dont ruin my hopes) to become a cheap like some german romantic movue from Rosamunde Pilcher, when u see those films u know it from first shoot, and u also now the whole story, keep preasure and hating what they done, all this amazing job...‬ ‪I would maybe shipping it two in different tv show, if it would be real...‬ ‪Its not my first rodeo, but in furst case I was sitting quitely and kept my mouth shout and my opinions to myself..‬ ‪But this time I am piss off cause u are all, touch ur conscience whi wrote what and where and hiw rude and disrespectfull to vreators u was, everyone one of u by yourself...Because they deserve so much better from us, our fandom, theyre doing it cause we love it so much. But we habe to be normal and think about whole thing ot only that part and gay happy end u want. It would make a joke from the whole show, because theyre both clearly elsewhere than u want them..John was dating, get married, had a baby, almost had an affair and its not still enough. I can almost hear u all argumenting that he or both of them are hidding it cause it happens in real life..Yeah but not everytime.Sometimes its just two huys become friends and after some time family..Sherlock, u could maybe said that he is little confusing about his sexuality at the start, and theough whole shiw, but its not about he being secretly gay( he is so clever and logic and reasonable that he would know that about himself and he would worked it out like everything, with pure logic) he is dofferent in other way, with his emotions, rudness, always bored by usuall stuff and ordinary life and so much mite thing, which we love so much about him..And he goes through some changes in those four bloody good seasons..He find his only friend in Watson, friend for gid sake, not future lover..He find his soulmate but in dofferent way that all lovesexpassion thing..And it was change him, in nice and goid way. But u all wake up and stop with all that hate pointing to creators and whole team..Ur fir no reason, yes i dont see that as a reason to hate all about finale and bitching and wining about it, because its not like u want it..U should appreciate and love the masterpiece they all made and not by bad and angry and rude AF! ‬ ‪I wastalking about that I saw this before, ta kind of funny because it was with Hannibal, it was also such a brilluant show( i became a huge fan of Mads Mikkelsen so see them together with Benedict in Doctor Strange was kind if my happy moment, omething like u wish with Sherlock and John huge gay love story..U are finding things where theyre not..) and it was same but it was probably a lot smaller fandom than Sherlock has, it was probably why it was cancelled after 3 season, but i also hope they will come back cause theyre some serious talks about it, but its not important now, but there was a characters of Hannibal and Will, it would take sometime to explain whole show but in shortcut Hannibal is psychopathic serial killer who eats people and like to cook them very goid, like high chefs stuffs and Will is nit an usuall detective(am I the only one who sees the simillarity yet?) he has this thing he can imagine in his somekind of mind palace how was those people kill when he us on crime scene..And there are some serious creeepy shit, but the point is that Hannibal becomes somehiw obssesed by Will, but not in the way of love, again, how somebody saw it, but there happen a lots of stuff which lead to weird kid of friendship between two very extraordinary people, like saving lives, and helping to other one, even if theyre are enemies fro the begiininf, and they both have relationship with women, doesnt matter hiw disturb those relationshio are, there was no romantic line between who somebody wanna see..It would also ruin the show, it was about friendship, between two not normal at all person, that fragile thing which start after all what they done to each other or to everybody else.Ther was that beauty, and this is the same case..We love Sherlock and Johns FRIENDSHIP...We dont want to turn it in different show, it wouldnt be like all ur memes and fanfiction story cause if this would happen there will be no base for any of this, u would win and what about us? U feel somehow(dobt get it why and how un this case) discriminated by this, but what about us all? There is always so mamy different opinions and tastes, never can make everyone happy, but theyre the creators and its up to them how its gonna be in the end. If u where on their place U could change it but they have theirs vision and they are creating it using their own fantasy and brilliant minds, all those twists and everything..U can express ur opinion, wish or feelings but doung that through rudness and hatefull comments and tweets and complains to BBC? I think its too much...And u being ungratefull amd dissrespectfull to their hard job...And amazing fantastic results... ‬ ‪They all deserve ours DEEPEST BOWS AND THANKS for taking us to this amazing rollercoaster ride of drama and emotions and hard thinking and deductions..It was quite something..And I dont say it like that, it means something cause I saw so many shows, and I usually watch even those which are nit as fun and i dont enjoy them too much, cause i am trying to give it a chance cause sometimes its worth it. But in case if Sherlock (i was never fanof crimi and i was the type "i dont givea fucj whi did that and why"cause they put detective and "maincharacters" aside in every crimi and i dont like that. Maybe I become wiser😂😂 i do t think so highly about myself😂😂with aging..Or i jist change, my taste change...) it was for the first time when I didnt do anything else then sit and didnt move or even breath at every episode, i didnt go to kitchen and let it play cause every minute and word it can be important, i didnt even scroll through my Iphone cause I am type of person who do t concentrate very good and gets easilly disstracted, and I was completly drown into...‬ ‪Yesterday I was being mad because of the finale cause we are now changing an operator and we are without cable tv, and I have this problem...I live in Czech Republic, so u all whos complaining, u cant imagine what i would give to have that chance to saw it cinema..I was prepar to be mad since 21 at England, at my country is one hoyr difference so its 22..And wait fir somebody uploaded online somewhere( not so nice, but when isnt any other usefull choice) so i couldnt look nowhere to avoid saw just a frame...And it was my imagination of pute torture..Longest two hours..Maybe u will think i am posh or whatever butour czech tv channel called Ct2 airs it at the same time, asi in England(surprise, in other cases we ate here at season 2 meanwhile there is season 6) but they made i with czech dabing..AndI just cant..I love it on english, i waych everything in english cause i hate stupid dabing its just looks like two totally different shows, the voice and the picture...Amd i would not even mention theyre picking very weirdly, with consideration(in their case not consideration would be more accurate) of real voice of those actors...So it would be torture and I would have it all completely ruined. So I was upset but I think I can not do anything, so I have to deal with it(u should do that too by the way). And I go to my best friend house around 20:00 and I was there only with my Iphone complaining about my "cruel fate" and how much I wanna saw it, in the best case now! My friend is untouched by Sherlocks charm ( i was trying to explain during watching it but I failed) and he doesnt completely understand my obssesion, so he looked at my like I am crazy. But even so he was trying to be helpfull and I try Google to find Bbc to watch online, it was second link, it was working but I didnt want to get my hopes up, but it was actually working. It was pure happiness and joy. I was literally sitting on the floor, totally carried away, holding my Iphone in ky hands listening to every word, poor my friend even go try to hold the washingmachine so I could hear that, and even I was a visitor for shit, he let me watch it all, and do t throw me out or kill me, for what I am beyond thankfull to him...And i enjoyed to best finale, another brilliant mind blowing episode and i was like on cloud nine, my emotions all over...Today i was little bit sad because I dont want this to be the end, i want more, and sooner than later...But its not in my powers and I have to hope and even if this was iver really like over over I would never be like u to creators even if it would ve there deccisiin if this is the end. I dobt know if its by the anonymity of the internet or what, and i dont wanna start with thinking about where the world going? But u bullying creators I dont have any other word for this. When I dound out today(yes I am maybe stupid but I assumed qhen I was so swooned and touched and excitedx from this episode, that everybody else defenetly must have been too..) And this is actually the reason why I spend half night by writting thus very long essay because of tv show...But this is about mire than that? its about basic human decency, which u dont have at all..Ur all like we want gueer and gay stuff here and the world is mean and bad and u creators are i dont wanna know how u called them, i feel ashamed by u, cause I dont want they to think the all fandom is bunch of mean hatefull people..Ur doing opposite for what u LGBT stands fir, but I really dobt wanna statt with those things..But u wanna be taken like "normal"(its not the right world, we are all same and what is even "normal" in this world...but i think u get how I mean it) but specially by this u putting yourselfs in special group whose calling for special treatment and its angry because its not what happened, and its offensive and discriminated to your LGBT rights...Dibt u see that this doesnt make sense cause it goes against each other....And because of this u make this whole ugly situation..‬ ‪I know u will have million and one things to said to me, to offended me or whatever but actually I am grown enough to take it and make it. I wrote this all just to express my opinion and my admiration to whole team of creators...Because they deserve it.. ‬ ‪So if by any chance this essay of mine gets a hold of eyes someone from whole Sherlock team this end will be for you. ‬ ‪I wanna thank you, so much, for bringing Sherlock to us and give us those amazing moments, and so brilliant tv show that there is hardly a rival somewhere. And I know that its not job of one, but whole team, so I bow to all of you, with hope in my heart that there will be more. I have to admmited that I was never so swallowed up by tv show, to do things like that. But this time I just have to. ‬ ‪To Mark Gattis and Steven Moffat as writters I truly envy their clever minds to get it here. Someone says that its out of line or reality or whatever someone didnt get gay finale, but I think that those two know very well what their are doing and they made it perfectly...So this is my thanks for entertain me...‬ ‪And in the end I have to, all actors are brilliant Martin is awesome (i didt saw Hobbit, so I keep thinking where did i saw him before and in the end i found out and laugh to myself, but I will make it right and watch all three espisodes very soon, i promise..) and i love this chemistry(friends) between John and Sherlock, because when I will be honest I would be like John...Little bit..Even if I would rather be Sherlock of course, i an realistic..And i love Martins looks on his face, those faces he makes, and I admire John for his strong friendship after all Sherlock did to him, even not on purpose..And Martin makes it so real and so good, he is good at his job.. ‬ ‪I am actually one of those who dont miss Moriarty, cause it would became boring if behind everything would be everytime only him..I think he is alive during TheFinalProblem because those subbtitles with time period was little late...And I was in shock but also I was like hell no..But that twist save it very well..And Andrew makes him very cool evilish devilish maniac, so I kind of like him after all..His tick tock on that red video drived me crazy, and I wasnt even there with Euros. Sian Brooke amazed me, she was terryfying, crazy but in the end I was sorry for her...She nailed it..And Mark as Mycrofr when he offers himself insteqd of John, and all was pure perfection together..Nithing was missing, badass Mr.Hudson, and i love just love that Sherlock feels something...And there I am going to the end, I save the best for last. Cause I dont if I dont let myself little carried away... ‬ ‪Because what makes Sherlock Sherlock its huge talent and gift from God and thats Benedict Cumberbatch. I am not any profesional and I just saying what I think but he is the best actor who walks on Earth right now...I did some reaserch today and i cant help myself but he is amazing even when you just listen to his voice reading a poem or audiobook, he has something special and perfect. I bow infront of him, so deep how I could, and that woukdbr be enough, cause he will achive great things, and I am very glad that he didnt go to law school, cause hidding this talent in court room would be such a waste. I really admire all of his work, and I have to say it I just love him..Its not other possibility. And other word wouldnt catch it like saying this love stuff. But we all know how it is, dont we? I am fangirling!!! Very much and I enjoying doing it. But I give myself goal and also fullfill dream if its happen that I wanna go to London to Sherlocked Event and meet him in real, say something nice( I will maybe figure it out till October) and take a pic..I would be very nervous, very, I am nervous from imagine it, making all thise script in my head what I will mess up. But we will see if I make it. And if i will I will thank him in person fir Sherlock and everything else.. ‬ ‪And thats all...And IT IS WHAT IT IS...‬ ‪ Sherlock ‬

#sherlock

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trendingnewsb · 7 years ago

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Aisling Bea: My fathers death has given me a love of men, of their vulnerability and tenderness

The comedians father killed himself when she was three. She was plagued by the fact he made no mention of her or her sister in the letter he left. Then, 30 years after his death, a box arrived

Aisling Bea with her father. Photograph: Aisling Bea

And then there was the letter.

My mother gave us the letter to read the day she told us, but, in it, he didnt mention my sister or me.

This summer was the 30th anniversary of his death. In that time, a few things have happened that have radically changed how I feel.

Finally, just after my 30th birthday, a box turned up.

She waited for us to fly home and we opened it together three little women staring into an almost-abandoned cardboard box.

Any child who has lost a parent probably knows every single photograph in existence of that parent. I had pored over them all, trying to put together the person he might have been.

To Daddy, here is my note to you: