#but tbh this is already more than I ever thought 911 would do | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

kiss2012 · 7 months ago

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finale thoughts

im done making excuses for this kim and marisol plotline it’s so dumb. they did the marisol break-up off-screen so idk why she had to be here this season at all.

devin kelly deserved better than this…she did the best with what she could but this never should’ve happened at all i can think of a thousand different ways to have done this. we didn’t even get any more shannon flashbacks. we could have seen how they met or gotten flashbacks of her life separate from eddie…

buck and eddie scene is so crazy. and i can’t believe buck didn’t even get the chance to go in and talk to chris THAT MAKES ME SO SICK also thinking about how he chose to call his grandparents instead of buck this time. and it’s like. i think it’s partly because he knew they’d take his side over eddie’s, and he thought buck would take eddie’s side

at least eddie looks beautiful.

what goes on through his brain tho 😭 the happy selfie with kim???? while he was mentally going through it?????

I LOVE HEN AND IM SAD ABOUT MARA

fuck off i hate this athena plotline. u know what if it had been amir he’d be justified. like angela bassett is slaying but yikes.

ohhhh but athena bringing back her past and how she’s connected to amir is good

MADDIE HAN 🩷 i did think they would both hyphenate maddie and chimney buckley-han but since we have jee buckley-han i love this <3

the cartel thing is dumb i can’t believe they got rid of the grant-nash family home (hugely important thing for bobby and athena) and the culprit is the cartel 🙄

girl bobby’s awake already??? he was barely in a coma i expected more from this???

i don’t care about tommy’s daddy issues or lack thereof.

fear im becoming a tommy hater actually. i liked him in 7x03, was fine with him in 7x04-7x05, was not a big fan in 7x06, was even less of a fan in 7x09, but now im actively annoyed…

the daddy kink scene???? 😭 made me cringe tbh. respect to those of you who feel like you’re winning but in my book this is out-of-place and out-of-pocket for the moment buck was trying to share something. genuine and heartfelt. and tommy. was there. and said that. ok. they also had no chemistry in that scene. sorry.

omg im SO MAD about this eddie plotline

MAY 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 thank god you’re here. and im so glad harry’s here too. this was a good scene.

buck christopher scene this is not a drill….

don’t think i would call helena and ramon “awesome grandparents” but ok buck.

EDDIE 😭😭😭😭😭😭

i want to bang my head into the wall why couldn’t they have just said “for the summer” he’s staying with his grandparents “for the summer” WHY DID THEY DO THIS

he could have stayed with pepa??

why did they bring back abuela for the wedding and not for this??

not a single carla mention huh

trying to convince myself that chris going to texas is the 911 version of rory staying with her grandparents in gilmore girls season 6 and like that storyline it will be terrible to watch but in a compelling way because eventually they reunite and everything’s great

but this isn’t helping to console me cause the two situations are different and the 911 one DIDNT NEED TO HAPPEN AND IM MAD

madney taking mara in is the sweetest

i love amir

ok but can bobby please say he also admires amir and that amir should get to build a life also????

ravi <33333333

why did they bring back gerard that’s the dumbest shit i’ve ever heard it makes no logical sense that man should be dead or retired by now

well. i wouldn’t really hate this episode if not for the eddie stuff as that makes me blind with rage (and if they had just said FOR THE SUMMER it would’ve been a tiny bit better). the bathena stuff had its highs and lows mostly lows. don’t appreciate how amir was treated for this storyline. madney slayed. mara didn’t deserve this and neither did henren or denny. buck’s stuff was…ok i guess….his scenes with christopher and eddie and the 118 were great his scene with tommy was bad he for some reason did not get one single moment in bobby’s room??? no one did??? we got one shot of eddie reading from the prayer book and not even the scene??

bad finale. terrible finale. it’s going to the very bottom of my ranking even below s1 and s6.

hm i need to take a moment to reflect. do i regret this month and a half long obsession with 911 now. i dont. but i do wish half of my month hadn’t been devoted to me being unable to stop thinking about the next ep and the next ep

like if i had known this was the endgame i don’t think i would have obsessively watched as much as i did. maybe i would’ve been able to focus on other things for more than an hour at a time

however before i was like Oh My God How Will I Survive The Hiatus and now at least im like yeah im done now peace out going to watch all the vids and fics i have saved and then i will have moved on

im also funnily enough still halfway through a rewatch LOL. which i think i will complete because i am just watching fave eps/skipping what idc about. so. now to go back to season 3. and to an actually good eddie plotline (eddie begins)

#this is soooo long #911 lb

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yesimwriting · 2 years ago

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Chapter 4 had me blushing like a schoolgirl, but also had me ready to call 911 because of Stu's complete disregard for boundaries 😭 Billy did the same thing, but at least he knew better than to go any further. Stu was trying to put A BUN IN THIS OVEN 😭 I glossed over any possible smut bc I didn't wanna read it, but I read a couple lines in and NAHHH you ain't giving me no kids. These two are the type to get you pregnant on purpose to forever chain you to them and I'm terrified that history is about to repeat itself. I already feared that Y/n was gonna be a Rory 2.0, but I didn't think Billy and Stu would move this fast.

The part where Y/n was like "I need you guys" made me WANNA DIE. GIRRLLL, you need to just shut up. They do not need to be praised; they need to be kicked out and TASED. We need to steal Well's taser and show them what happens when they try to take advantage of us. Imagine how devastated Y/n would have been to know she slept with them...she wouldn't be able to look Tate and Sid in the eyes. Y/n was so drunk she wouldn't have been able to probably fight back much. If she did fight back, they would be like "you want this, you know you do," but I also feel like Billy MAYBE would have stopped if he saw that Y/n was crying and clearly scared of him, but idk about Stu. I feel like Stu is more twisted and he'd be too selfish to stop.

I was surprised at how fast they were moving, but it just goes to show how little of a threat they see Gloria as. Billy and Stu are not scared of Gloria or Wells and that's a problem bc who else is going to make them back off? Y/n basically lied with that "making progress" comment and I'm so happy Gloria is so protective bc she isn't gonna be afraid to call Billy and Stu out and she's the only other strong support system Y/n has. She has a very strong influence on Y/n, and she will be able to convince Y/n that she might not be able to trust them. Billy and Stu are jealous of their relationship, but their so confident that Y/n 'needs them' that Gloria not liking them is an afterthought. I'm so ready for Gloria to give Y/n some advice 😭

love your reactions!! obsessed with you tbh,, asks about final girl make my day

i'm glad you felt that way bc that's what i was going for 😭 like a few moments that are a little like aw <3 and then something else happens and it's like...wait a minute 👀that's ...not right AlSO BUN IN THE OVEN PLS GLORIA WOULD KILL THEM ALL SHE'S SO CLOSE TO HAVING HER IVY LEAGUE DAUGHTER DREAM FULFILLED

also "These two are the type to get you pregnant on purpose to forever chain you to them" SO REAL, THEY WOULD LOWKEY,, especially if they feel like Y/n likes kids?? but also at the same time i feel like they'd have fun with it for five minutes and then get mad if you cared more about your kid than them 😭 but i'm not a fan of writing the pregnancy trope, so the odds of this actually happening are kinda low lol (might do something that draws parallels to history repeating itself tho 👀)

and Rory 2.0!! (you watch gilmore girls!! ahh!!) i do kind of get a rory energy from y/n now that you brought it up lol. Single mom support system, ivy league dreams, potentially derailing their future for a boy(s).

also boundaries!! that's such a big thing here! In Stu's "defense "(and i use that word loosely), he doesn't mean to push boundaries like that. Not deep down (at least to y/n, he doesn’t care too much about anyone else lmao) He just gets caught up in the moment and gets excited and is so good at justifying his actions in his head that he starts to believe it. His thoughts are wired that way. In my opinion, the only thing that ever gets him to be like 'oh, bad, let's stop' is the external reactions of those he actually cares about. Meaning Billy, basically, lol.

I don't want to write them in a way that makes it seem like Billy's in control of all of Stu's actions and kind of babysits him, but I do think that Billy's a bit of a moral compass/guideline for Stu. Like, Stu knows that Billy has similarly messed up interests, so if Billy is like 'dude' Stu knows he fr needs to take a step back, or at least think things through a little more.

Stu also cares about what Y/n thinks, but it's a little different. Stu is selfish, especially when it comes to impulsive moments, and when he's in that mood, he isn't really thinking about the consequences of his actions. Plus, Y/n's a girl, and a slightly sheltered girl too. He justifies--and subconsciously believes--that she wants it/him too and she just doesn't know it. Or she's just too scared to admit it to herself bc of her upbringing and morals (he is dating Tatum, and Y/n loves Tatum)

Now, this in no way justifies his actions or thought process, but Stu's not completely wrong, per say. Y/n is kinda scared of dating let alone having sex, and she wouldn't go for someone dating her friends, and she does...or at least is, starting to like Stu and Billy more than she'd ever let herself even acknowledge in her thoughts. Doesn't make it okay though!!

but if you want to go into hypotheticals the aftermath would have been BRUTAL! Billy is more worried about Y/n finding some way to leave them bc of his mom, so he wants to go about their entire relationship in a more methodical, careful, patient way.

He's willing to put in the hours (we know Billy likes his plans lmao) as just a friend. Sure, a friend that might be around a lot, and is just smidge more touchy than someone like him can get away with, but a friend. He can monitor your reactions and figure out how to set the pace of your friendship-to-relationship pipeline according to you. That way he knows you won't get scared off.

Stu agrees, but sometimes he just can't help himself. Plus, he can get away with more bc everyone knows that Stu is touchy.

I don't think Stu would have done anything assault-y to Y/n that night unless Y/n initiated something (which, considering his warped perception, could have been something small) or he got really triggered and lost control. (tbh, his worst intentions were overly cuddling/lowkey feeling up Y/n...and maybe stealing a pair of her underwear) but still!! too far!

but if something did happen and Y/n was upset the next morning, Stu would for sure be trying to smooth it over. If it didn't work and Y/n started crying?? game over, Stu actually feels remorse for once,, Billy is super mad about the whole situation, everything would be so bad!

Fortunately, though, my fic world is nice :)) there will be character development :) now, it is Billy and Stu, so will the situation ever be 1000 percent free of toxicity? Nooo,, but things can get better, especially when it comes to boundaries and things of that nature. I don't want it to be like a whole 'oh she fixed him' thing, but things do get nicer,, sweeter. But a lot of rough things have to happen first!!

never straight up SA though!! as someone that knows what it's like to have a guy force a kiss and feel them up, i can't even imagine how traumatic a darker turn of events would be.

#final girl fic #billy loomis #billy loomis x reader #stu macher #stu macher x reader

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fresh-bag-of-ham · 4 years ago

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@melatovnik ok here we go finally! first: my thoughts on body wash and moisturizer!

1) body wash: there are probably some really high end body washes out there that feel lovely but this is one step where i have not been convinced that i need anything more than a basic drug-store brand moisturizing wash a la olay ultra hydrating shea butter, dove something or other, cerave something or other, aveeno, etc. there's lots of brands with nice cheap hydrating gentle formulas, i don't think it matters a ton, just as long as it's not that suave garbage UGH it's so harsh if i'm ever staying somewhere that only has that i just skip body wash altogether, i've been burned too many times. medicated washes are a different story (which will be a different post) but otherwise it just goes down the drain! as long as what you got works fine and doesn't ravage your skin, spend the money elsewhere.

IF i wanted to upgrade, i have my eye on the skinfix eczema+ foaming oil body wash, which is $24 for just 12.5 oz, which, again, silly for something i'm going to immediately wash off! but i have a sample of the facewash that i just tried and it was very nice and i like their other products, so there you go.

2) moisturizer: that cerave cream... yes. probably the best bang for your buck out there, nice feel and absolute cheapest price per oz. the aveeno eczema therapy is awesome too, loaded with panthenol which is super soothing, though not an emollient. IF you wanted to upgrade, if those weren't cutting it for you and you were still dry/scaly/flaky and wanted more liquid oil emollient content (me lately), these are my thoughts rn:

a) slight upgrade option: la roche-posay lipikar balm ap+. decent size 400 mL pump bottle for $20 at target, kind of ointmenty smell and greasy feel putting it on, but you've got sunflower seed oil and shea butter pretty high up the ingredient list, but still at a really good price point. the petrolatum and mineral oil will really grease you up if you use a lot but you really don't need to, and they're both great occlusives anyway. plus it has niacinamide. i'm generally a fan.

b) serious upgrade option: skinfix eczema+ line. i have an old tube of the hand repair cream i really like, i was just using the remedy+ 911 ointment on my scaly dry legs bc it was all i had (which worked instantly), and i've just ordered a new hand cream and the body cream to see how they work for my current scaly lizard body. a definite step up in price per oz (i just spent $18 and $34 for those two products) but the ingredients are great, basically all various natural oils right from the top of the list, so you should definitely be getting more/longer relief than from your cheapy water/glycerin/cetearyl alcohol lotion formulas.

c) mad scientist: if you really want something more emollient-y than what you're using, cheaper than b and probably more pleasant than a, here is what i would try. take your cerave cream. now go find a bottle of pure squalane oil. the ordinary has one for like $7, timeless has one for $10, other places sell it for more. it's a little couple-ounce bottle with a dropper. squalane is a stabilized version of an oil that everyone already makes in their skin, and because it's stabilized it shouldn't break you out. just squirt your lotion in your hand, and add a drop of squalane oil, mix, and apply. you can play around with how much or how little you like, try putting squalane directly on without the lotion, or ditch it if you hate it (and you still have the original lotion you already knew you liked!). i kind of like just putting the squalane directly on my face at night tbh, just lube me right up.

d) if we're talking just face moisturizer, and you already know you like the cerave cream, the cerave pm facial moisturizing lotion is SO good. basically the same formula as the cerave cream with the addition of niacinamide, which is a b vitamin with extremely strong evidence for doing many things for your skin including regulating oil production, boosting collagen, evening pigment, etc etc. it's basically the first active ingredient i would recommend to anyone because it has so many benefits and there's basically no downside.

you can doctor up a combination of regular cerave cream plus a basic $5 niacinamide serum for cheaper if you really wanted, or the cerave pm is like $15 for a bottle. cerave pm is a lot of people's first rec on the road to upping your skincare game bc it works so well for so many people, it's hard to go wrong

#i will have to do my moisturizer theory hot takes and answer your acne treatment questions later because it is my bedtime #but i hope this helps!#skincare #sorry this isn't under a readmore try a functional blogging platform next time

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ellelans · 3 years ago

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You made a tag comment about how Buddie wasn't planned from the beginning. And therefore what we got in Season 2 wasn't (at the time) the groundwork for a love story. I agree completely! Much of it I can see as either a bit of fun (the Christmas elf, the instagram girl) or that kind of hyper-masc heterosexuality that loops around itself and becomes gay (Buck's whole...thing with Eddie in the beginning, the focus on Eddie's body/hotness/physical appearance). But sometimes I step back and look at the whole and I'm all 🧐 🤔.

I don't even know what I'm asking lol. Would just love your thoughts/feelings on the confusing spectacle that are Buck and Eddie in season 2. And when/how/why did the show change their mind?

Thank you so much for the ask and you know what? Let’s talk about it.I recently had an in depth chat about this pretty unpopular opinion with a friend and I tried to explain to her why I don't see buddie as an actual pairing or having any canon potential until early s3 and why I don't believe they were planned from the beginning.This will be long and all over the place of course lol

The first and the most obvious reason is the way 911 deals with main characters and their romantic arcs.They don't actually drag it on for long because there is no need or time for that since every single main character has a strong storyline of their own and any romantic development between any pair as an additional combined storyline. Relationships happen fast on 911 because they are planned ahead and the only relationship that took longer than usual few episodes was Chim and Maddie and they were already kissing and planning a date in 2x11.

Also when shows enter their second season there is never a way to predict how long it will stay on the air and because of that it is impossible for me to believe that buddie was planned as some epic old school slowburn that is nowhere as close to be resolved after 3 seasons.When I say old school slowburn I mean shows that have this one heterosexual romance at the center of the universe that is usually stretched across seasons and builds up sexual tension between characters and it takes literally years for them to finally get together.We have these two characters that where made for each other and you KNOW that they will eventually get together because of some ridiculous pining that will eventually end in a kiss and everyone will scream and cry.And maybe that’s how buddie feels to me now after years of careful build up-but the way I see it they as a potential something didn't happen in s2.

We all joke about how character introduction of Eddie is the gayest we have ever seen and Buck's reaction to him as true bisexual and I do that myself too because I am a bisexual too and tbh its hard to unsee (also I don't want to) but lets remove our rainbow glasses for a second. What really did happened in that scene? Eddie's perfect abs on display,Chim and Hen fun comments on how beautiful he is,Bobby's praise and bragging about getting Eddie and his Silver Star on the team and Buck's insecurities flaring up as a reaction to all of this.Buck immediately feels threatened.At this point we of course have no idea how deeply his insecurities run or why,but as episode progresses we witness Eddie on his first call making a better decision to how to handle a medical situation and backed up by Bobby.It has sort of a devastating effect on Buck,who suddenly starts acting like we have never seen him before.Then there is a that scene at the gym where Buck tells Eddie how he is his problem. And later we of course have the scene in ambulance when Eddie asked what exactly they are measuring. Because that's what it looked like - a usual macho men measuring context. But the thing is 911 doesn’t toxic masculinity when it comes to main male characters and we saw many examples of that already by then,but the biggest one was supposed to be BuckandEddie. Equals,partners and best friends.

911 was already pushing boundaries with cast,characters and relationships diversity and I strongly believe that what they wanted to show us was a male equivalent of what we are used to see in female bffs -a different kind of a friendship between men. Men who care about each other,who talk about feelings,discuss sex,dating or why they don’t,who again openly acknowledge that they find each other attractive and giving advices on how to take a more flattering selfie,who are not afraid of crying, admit they are struggling or heartbroken or loving their kid.Honestly when was the last time any of us saw a male friendship like theirs?Men are not allowed to be like that on TV (I am still shocked that its a Fox show tbh) and especially with each other.We are not used to see such a development so no wonder people started paying attention-which was what writers wanted,of course.

But that also brings us to that important question about queer undertones,subtext and do what we actually see in s2. Are there queer undertones?Absolutely. Subtext?It’s right there but you will probably not get it unless you’re reading between the lines.Before we get to Christmas Elf,there was ‘’He is cute!/He gets that a lot,you should’ve seen his kid...’’ Maddie and Buck scene that is once again reinforces that Buck finds Eddie attractive and it shouldn’t be a surprise because we already know from 2x01 he has eyes - but they mention it AGAIN and that personally made me raise a brow or two.By the time we get to that Christmas episode,we already have Shannon back and Buck finally moved on from Abby with Taylor and then Ali and then we are given another queer coded scene-with Christmas elf.And its very cute and to an average heterosexual viewer its a nice little joke,but any queer watching that scene was probably taken aback a little.

So why imo did Tim&Co do it and when they realized they can actually see where they can take BuckandEddie and when they started becoming buddie?My answer is ship teasing.It’s what a lot of people actually mistake for queer baiting,but we are not talking about that rn.Ship teasing works like charm and if shows can get away with that-they will totally use it to their advantage.It’s usually not always malicious,but it IS always intentional because that brings in a category of people that were overlooked for a long time-online fandom.Now I have seen some opinions that fandom doesn’t really matter,it’s the ratings that count and that is NOT TRUE.You can have your ratings,but if there is no buzz online?Your show is going nowhere.For at least a decade now every self-respecting production has teams to monitor fandom activities because it gives them better ideas about how consumers(fans) are interacting with their product (show).Fandom is important because we generate the buzz.So I do believe that BuckandEddie and that sweet ship teasing were to get a certain part of the fandom pay attention.

I wasn’t here when S2 aired so I don’t know if that was the case,but it is obvious that these scenes I talked about above made fans pay a LOT of attention. And maybe that was the reaction writers needed to start changing course from ship teasing to start building up to something else.They maybe didn’t plan it at the very beginning and on paper,but lets also not forget the insane chemistry between Oilver and Ryan,which imo is another big reason-it's impossible to ignore.

Because S3?Is light years away from S2 in terms of BuckandEddie-they became buddie.In s3 Buck and Eddie become each other’s significant other,they are in a primary relationship. ’’Buck invites Eddie...’’?!!!!! It is not yet romantic and probably won’t be until ending of s5 if we are lucky-but it is in your face,they are not subtle anymore.I personally saw buddie only at the end of 3x03 when Eddie came over and said that there is noone in the world he trusts with his son more than Buck, looking like he did into Buck’s eyes,while ‘Photograph’ played in the background right before Buck’s overvoice about being seen and found and a raft to bring one home. After S4 ending tho...we all know that something is about to happen and its like there is electricity in the air as we are waiting for s5!

Probably a lot more thoughts than you expected,but I have many feelings about these two and when buddie goes canon this post will become completely irrelevant lol 💖

#what i was trying to say #is that s2 still can be read as heterosexual #but s3? no way #s3 was different #it was impossible to ignore that something is going on #911 #buddie

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littlespoonevan · 3 years ago

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just finished season four. i literally feel deranged. i already knew exactly what was gonna happen in the last two episodes and i STILL feel unhinged. oh my god

like!!! please please get maddie some help (which i am fully confident that chimney will but it still hurts to see her hurting); send bobby and athena to couples therapy; i did actually quite like hen and karen’s storyline as foster parents this season and i hope we get to see more of that

but eddie. oh my god eddie. i wish we could see his recovery but based on what i’ve been seeing on tumblr that isn’t super likely to happen. i just. i cannot believe what i just watched

and then the fucking CHANGING HIS WILL??? WHAT??? that’s not rly normal best friend behavior that’s like. i don’t even fucking know kind of behavior

so yeah. unhinged. this is incomprehensible —new 911 watcher

I HAD MORE THOUGHTS. why does carla tell eddie to make sure he’s following his heart and not christopher’s. what does that even MEAN. literally how could that be interpreted in any other way than “you have feelings for someone else who is not ana and you should follow up on that” and who else could it possibly be but buck? fuck i am losing my MIND —new 911 watcher

ahh omg anon, you finished it!!! honestly i watched those last few eps almost two months ago and i still feel unhinged lol

i definitely think maddie's ppd storyline is one that will be carried into next season so hopefully we'll see a lot more of that. and honestly i would kill for bobby and athena to dig into their problems more too!

as for everything eddie related.......I Know. the absolute chaos 911 unleashed in those last two episodes was incomprehensible, you're right. for what it's worth re: eddie's recovery i think people jumped the gun way too much about us getting nothing bc of the time jump at the end of the ep but like, even if he's back to work at the beginning of s5 and we don't see the immediate recovery, at the very least i'm expecting them to reference it.

tbh i'm envisioning something similar to buck's storyline in 3x01 like maybe eddie's only just back to work and struggling to adjust bc his recovery doesn't end when his shoulder is healed y'know!! while we don't always get the immediate aftermath for the characters, none of their traumas have ever been completely forgotten (buck's leg carries through half of s3, maddie's trauma with doug comes back in s3, bobby's alcoholism comes up multiple times including the s4 finale, chimney and the rebar are addressed again at the beginning of s2, even hen brings up evelyn and the ambulance crash in the crossover)

so i'm not too worried even though i would've killed for seeing him get through the first few weeks of everything. but tv shows love a good old time jump :/

but carla's line..............honestly out of every single thing 911 has done that was the one thing that made me stop and go, "wait we're dOING THIS?????????" people had theorised about it for weeks and i never expected it to actually happen. and you're so right!!!! the phrasing really does suggest there's someone else eddie wants and i don't know what to do with that!!!! @ tim you better address this in s5 ok i have questions

anyway i hope you had fun watching, anon, bc i loved hearing your thoughts throughout! :D

#anon #asks

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sunflowerhae · 4 years ago

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Omfg the story of us is one of my fav Taylor songs so can you write that with mark 🥺🥺 thank youuuuuu

|📣 ▹▹ brooo it’s one of my favorite too 😩😩 I hope u enjoy! 💕🌙 ok tbh I don’t really like the ending so sorry abt that😔😔

Send in your music requests! ✨👼🏻

“I used to think one day we'd tell the story of us How we met and the sparks flew instantly And people would say, "they're the lucky ones’”

“Jesus you two are so lucky” Yeji couldn’t keep her comments in as you turned away from Marks retreating frame and to the green-eyed girl sitting in front of you at the library desk you two were currently occupying. Late night study sessions for the upcoming college exams called for loyal boyfriends to bring coffee from the campus starbucks for you and your best friend, effortlessly gaining brownie points with you.

“What do you mean we’re lucky?” You snickered as you handed her coffee to her and immediately sucked in your own cold, bitter sweet; feeling the coffee practically revive your body.

Yeji sighed with an elongated eye roll to express her clear annoyance at your confusion. “Y/n, everyone knows you and Mark are the cutest couple on campus. I mean you two met at what, a frat party?-“

“-yeah” you mumbled.

“-Yeah, and you two immediately clicked. I mean your two year anniversary is coming up, right? I won’t be surprised if you two are telling your children how you met in 10 years.” She laughed at the end of her sentence as you gasped and balled up an empty piece of paper in front of you; throwing it at her giggling and arm-protected frame as you whisper yelled,

“Yeji - shut up!” The light pink hue undoubtedly covered your face and ears at her claims as you both went back to the notes in front of you. Yeji - quickly forgetting the conversation - started complaining about the riparian plants of the San Joaquin (“-like we’re not even at the San Joaquin-“) but your mind was too preoccupied with the previous conversation, and a smile slowly etched it’s way onto your face as her words settled deep into your heart -

Unfortunately setting you up for heartbreak.

“Oh, a simple complication Miscommunications lead to fall out So many things that I wish you knew So many walls up I can't break through”

“Well you were supposed to come over and help me pack!” You couldn’t help your voice from failing you and slightly raising in accusation and anger, and you cringed at the annoyance of your tone. You could hear Mark sigh on the other side of the receiver - even over the sounds that occupied his side of the call.

“Y/n, I know, I’m sorry. I thought you meant later. I didn’t know you needed the help right now.” You wanted to ask him to come over now; to drop whatever commitment he was already at and come be with you like he said he would, but the idea of stressing him more than the situation already is, you’re sure, left a twisted feeling in your stomach, and a metallic taste in your mouth. And, with yet another sigh - maybe the 40th one through out this entire, 6 minute call - you told him that it wasn’t a big deal and he could make it up to you later. You both mumbled your I love you’s before he hung up first - leaving you in complete silence.

Your heart burned at the thought of yet another conversation passed where you refused to let out the feelings that were too overgrown for the space of your chest. There was so much you wanted to say to Mark; so much that you wished he knew. Usually, you wouldn’t hesitate to tell him how you feel - but lately the conversations seemed strained and overworked, and you had reserved yourself to the insecure thoughts that maybe Mark didn’t want to hear how you felt, and maybe it was best for your relationship if you kept them in.

You spaced out your gaze as you looked around your almost empty dorm room. It was the end of your junior year of college, and you and Mark were supposed to be packing up your room. Mark, however, forgot about it and chose to instead spend his time hanging out with his frat brothers (like he always did).

No. You slapped the side of your head and shook it back and forth while trying to get rid of the jealous thoughts. It’s okay. It’s not that deep. You’re fine.

To distract yourself, you shot Yeji a text to come help you with your room. At this, your thoughts wandered back to that late night in the school library, and your frown deepened.

You’re fine. We’re fine.

“Now I'm standing alone In a crowded room And we're not speaking and I'm dying to know Is it killing you like it's killing me yeah I don't know what to say since the twist of fate When it all broke down and the story of us Looks a lot like a tragedy now”

The music blasting through the speakers of the party was giving you nothing short of a migraine, and the unknown, red alcohol in your cup was doing nothing to soothe it. In your defense, it’s not like you wanted to be here. You would have preferred to be back in your new apartment, unpacking your boxes with a romcom playing, a candle burning, and your new cat, Ivy, cuddled up on the couch. Yet, when Yeji all but bullied you through text to come to the first party of your last year of college, you didn’t have much of a choice other than to attend. You hoped that maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as your mind was playing it up to be, this thought being reinforced by your best friend. The minute you walked through the doors of the quite familiar frat house, however, you instantly regretted ever showing your face in these hallowed halls.

You knew almost everyone in this room, yet also felt like you knew no one. Lately, that was a pretty normal feeling for you. You had spent the majority of your college experience being friends with the people that partied all around you; getting to know them at events not so different than this one. Yet, you - ever the shy one - wouldn’t have even known them, if it weren’t for a certain person that occupied the majority of your thoughts. The very same person standing across the room from you, playing beer pong with his fellow frat members.

This summer had not been kind to you.

Your uncertainties about your relationship with Mark bled into the summer heat, and were reinforced by the distance you two shared. Calls became far too in between, and texts were sporadic and short; usually just quick check-ins and awkward hellos and goodbyes.

Those were all okay for you. Well, they weren’t okay, but they were better than nothing; better than not having him.

The climax of the summer, however, came mid July, when you called and he did not answer. This wasn’t a new thing, so you left it. Yet when you called him a second, third, and fourth time (in the span of 24 hours) and he never answered, never texted you, never even acknowledged you, you knew something was wrong. You didn’t want to be the annoying one in the relationship (always so insecure), so you left it once more.

For a week.

A week had gone by without so much as a two letter word between each other. Deep in your heart, you knew the relationship was over at that point. But how could one admit that they had lost the love of their life so easily? So finally, after three weeks of no contact, you texted him a four letter message that hopefully explained everything you felt.

So this is it?

Mark responded.

I think so.

That summer was recorded as one of the hottest since 1946, but you never noticed. Your tears kept you cold.

“See me nervously pulling at my clothes And trying to look busy And you're doing your best to avoid me I'm starting to think one day I'll tell the story of us How I was losing my mind when I saw you here But you held your pride like you should have held me”

If you could cross the room and pull Mark into your hold and hug and kiss him like you two never even broke up, you would do it at as fast as the speed of sound. But Mark didn’t want you anymore, he made that clear. He was laughing at something Haechan said, and he looked beautiful; you felt idiotic for staring. You prayed he - or anyone else, for that matter - didn’t notice you there, but after shooting a text to Yeji that you were leaving, and looking back up at him for the last time, you were surprised to see that he was already looking at you. His eyes were rounded larger than usual, and even from your corner across the room, you could see the shock in them at your presence.

Time stopped as you two stared at each other, before you finally let out a small cough and looked down at your shirt to “fix” it, while Mark quickly looked anywhere but you. Satisfied with whatever you were trying to do with your clothes, you looked at Mark’s awkward figure one last time through your eyelashes, before turning and walking out of the party. When Mark looked back to where he last saw you, you weren’t there anymore, and his heart became hyperaware of the ever present twinge of pain that seemed to constantly be there, whether he numbed it out or not.

To be clear, Mark isn’t too sure why he broke up with you. While he still was deeply in love with you, you and him didn’t seem to be on the same page anymore, and that was enough reason for him to leave you. He wished he could hold you, hug you, love you like he used to. But every time you came to his head, the cringe at the way you two ended things quickly followed, and he’s too embarrassed to even think about talking to you again.

With a sigh, Mark turned back to his friends, and spent the rest of the night trying to drink away the memory of your face across the room.

“The battle's in your hands now But I would lay my armor down If you'd say you'd rather love than fight”

The insistent knocking on your apartments door at 3am scared more than annoyed you, and you couldn’t help yourself from grabbing the bat next to your bed before slowly making your way towards the door. You had 911 on speed dial in one hand and your bat in the other. It was moments like this that made you especially miss Mark, because lord knows you couldn’t fight back if someone tried to break in (not like you wouldn’t try).

Trying to distract yourself from the fear, you thought back to the party a month earlier, and your terrified thoughts had you thinking ‘if this is how I die, I’m going to regret never talking to Mark again’ as you arrived at your door.

You slowly lifted yourself to your peep hole, and let out a gasp at who you saw on the other side. You quickly placed your bat on the ground and your phone on the counter by your door, and opened the door wide.

“Mar-“ you didn’t get far before Mark took one huge step towards you, cupped your cheeks with his hands, and smashed his lips onto yours. You both stumbled into your home before mark pushed the door closed and spun you both, slightly pushing you against the door. After about 45 seconds of intense making out, Mark broke away and placed his forehead on your own.

“Hi,” you giggled out, to which Mark laughed himself.

“Hi.”

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reyescarlos · 4 years ago

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Honestly I'm not sure I wanna see Paramedic TK... I mean, they seem to be "less" important in the show (well I feel like the show is more about firefighters than paramedic...) Anyway, I don't know much about firefighters in the US but based on Station 19 in every station they have a Captain and at least one lieutenant (and the others are regular firefighters I guess). In Lone Star we have only one Cap', Owen.... The obvious choice for lieutenant would be Judd but.... Well maybe TK want to apply for being a lieutenant? I would love to see that tbh... But in any case (paramedic or lieutenant) it feel like it would happen very quickly (something like 2 episodes?) it feel a bit rushed imo.... But we'll see!

Sorry for the rambling ^^'

It would be interesting to see how they’d incorporate it. If it’s anything like what we see in 911 with Hen and Chim where they are active and out on every scene, I don’t think it would make much of a difference. TK would just have a new expectation/role to play when they respond to a call. Tbh I’ve lived in NYC my whole life and never put much thought to the ranking of fire stations. These two shows are the only ones I’ve ever tuned into with firefighters and the like so my knowledge is 110% based off what I see on screen.

I would LOVE to see Judd as lieutenant. He would be so, so perfect in that position. It would make more sense to me for him to get that job. TK is far too green; Judd has way more experience. And just logistically, I think it would be a better option if they ever got around to making someone on the crew step into a higher up rank within the 126. Hell, we’ve already seen him be a temporary captain so yeah, he’d be the best bet. He has a good command of the group and he’s very knowledgeable.

Ha, I don’t mind it! It’s a good conversation and I like getting the chance to think about possible roads for these characters to go down. Whether it’s a lieutenant gig or a paramedic position, I would be curious to see how they do it. I mean, we have a pretty solid gauge given the episode description but I’d like to see TK going through the motions of making this decision. This week seems to be going by quickly so Monday will be here before we know it and we’ll get an answer one way or another!

#911 ls spoilers #911 ls speculation #anon #message #ask

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spnreactionblogging · 4 years ago

Text

CARRY ON

spoilers below but I’m very late to the game

here we go!!! there's Some Woman in the thumbnail for this episode and I'm like oh boy did you fuckers turn castiel into a girl to make it Not Gay, I will riot. we're off to a dread-inducing start I'm honestly not even sure I want to watch this? I have not heard anything good but since my options are either keep SPN blacklisted forever but ultimately get spoiled anyway, or use my dwindling remaining time to see it for myself without being told what happens, may as well be on my own terms I am hearing that misha and possibly j2 were not happy with this, whatever this is (?????) yikes I don't understand how you even have another episode after the last one. that seems like a traditional ending. you either beat a dead horse or go ultra meta and it sounds like they dropped the ball, big time but let's see jack's sweet and deserved better. there's a clock but it's NOT heat of the moment playing, damn oh the dog. we love you miracle dog sam's still jogging where's eileen!!!! I like seeing sam cooking I actually enjoy watching them do domestic stuff dean sneaking food to the dog 😭 can this be the whole episode, just them doing chores I meant to catch which book sam was reading I can't tell but it looks like it's old this is extra bonus sad for knowing that they couldn't even like, have a wrap party or anything. extra isolated. :( SPECIAL GUEST STAR JIM BEAVER!!! "Are you sure you're ready for this?" "Oh, I don't have a choice." dean hasn't been this relatable to me in years, this is how I feel watching this lmao akron pie fest dean dies of complications from diabetes god I miss bakeries or restaurants or anything I do love Sad Sam Face "I"'m thinking about Cas, you know? Jack. If they could be here." thank you Sam that pain isn't going away for me either "stop being an eeyore" Sam's the Eeyore of the series, Dean, okay, and same lmao jared fucking slammed that pie into jensen's face and they just filmed it. you can see the actual glee on his face brady??? like sam's old classmate? wasn't that his name? or no some kid. is this just a regular-ass monster of the week. do sam and dean just get killed by like. regular people? are there no monsters anymore. I would actually love that. humanity is truly the worst monster of all. didn't we learn that in season 1 :') in "the benders" are these guys sam and dean? are they just murdering monster families like they did in the holiday episode? what is happening. are those dean's shoes. I could probably recognize how they walk if I really paid attention i guess not. probably. "singer and kripke, FBI" ha fucking clowns lmao poor sam they still have dad's journal, huh. THE LORE evil mimes. vamp-mimes. I guess they kill these dudes? we gonna unmask them or what there we go this guy looks like joseph gordon-levitt oh we love torture on this show this is definitely "dean who's NOT the ultimate killer" amirite "if those kids are dead he's gonna use a spoon" how very walter sullivan of you also I feel like sam would not do this anymore but hey who am I, someone who likes consistent characterization? lol we're back to creepy barns instead of wet pipe factories dean has a fucking shuriken lmao I honestly for real need a machete for the overgrown weeds I don't hate this so far? I'm tired of the constant torture but I guess this feels like early seasons, kind of. idk. lmao sam with the concussions. classic tie them to a chair. it's what we do. i will be disappointed if they are not tied to a chair jenny? cue studio killers. I do not remember whatever episiode this is but it looks very early based on sam's hair oh thanks sam. couldn't get out of this episode without beheading a woman too one of the suggestions for me typing "woman" was a high-heeled shoe emoji. thanks, predictive text...?????? true feminist oh damn he could very well get tetanus from that. that's how trinity dies, man. should've gotten your booster shot, dean. vaccines save lives this is like the plot of signs why don't you guys wear bulletproof shit. your plot armor was holding you together until now. GUYS THIS IS HOW HUNTERS GO OKAY don't ever un-impale someone, guys like "dean we are in a major city, there are ambulances" call fucking 911, someone could be there already "I've always looked up to you" because you're taller than me lmaoooo idefk what to say about this like. we all know this is how hunters die. you fucking leered at jessica is what you did, dean if sam makes it out of this I'll accept it. if sam lives I can be okay. if this is the only way sam gets free of this, I'm okay. CALL 911 AND CALL JACK "always keep fighting" aw :( they're both very good at crying, I will give them that we never think it's gonna be the day. at least you got pie. OH THE WINCHESTER FAMILY MUSIC don't do this to me dean got a way better death than castiel. this actually reminds me a liiiiittle bit of the end of season 2? with how dean holds sam's body. the writing here is overwrought though. jared and jensen do the best they can with the script they're given but like you guys just FOUGHT GOD. they're a bit too up their own ass with this. you can tell that dabb thinks he's very clever. sam... gets a dog again? at least. i guess. the pacing is bad. I don't hate this on principle but it is not executed well. I am having like no emotional response to this except maybe relief for sam in a horrid way. like, you're free! at what cost. it's like the opposite of season 5? sam survives instead of dean. and... sam marries a dog. where do they get all this fucking lumber!!! did sam chop that all himself dude if he woke up to "heat of the moment" i'd lose my shit in the best way. gabriel wins. "gotta keep you on your toes." what had to change in this because of the pandemic? at least sam has a dog to be in scenes with him. the two guns as big and little brothers is an interesting choice of a shot. god the fucking phones. "DHS" "CIA" "dean's 'other other' phone" "state patrol" what's the paperwork on his desk? (512) is an Austin area code I have this on amazon prime and the saddest thing thus far is X-Ray: Jared Padalecki as Sam Winchester, with no other actors at all. meta ways, pandemic related. "this is agent bon jovi" donna's alive??? sam just quit, babe. just quit. or take a day off at least, jesus. didn't you just drive back from ohio are you even gonna go back to the bunker DEAN IN HEAVEN!!! how'd you get here. "well at least I made it to heaven" lmao he said the same thing oh hey bobby!! I love jack god i've missed jim beaver you guys moved on to dream bubbles!!!!! RUFUS how very homestuck + narnia of you, starring sam winchester as susan pevensie so jack just like melded all of these metaphysical spaces, I'm cool with that "so the question is what are you gonna do now, dean?" get a better beer so I can drink and drive with my car that's in heaven, I'm already dead so who cares what I hit TELL ME WHERE IS BALTHAZAR FOR I MUCH DESIRE TO SPEAK WITH HIM break everyone out of the empty I do get the impression this was supposed to be a big cast reunion and the pandemic clobbered that :( oh it's the original license plate on the impala sure do love that cas and jack "helped" to give dean everything he's ever wanted. the only time "carry on my wayward son" has been diegetic I guess sam and the dog had a child I like jared in glasses are we doing a bunch of elderly makeup yeah there he is did they just spray grey temp dye on his hair or what is sam gonna drive into toluca lake!!! buddy please don't just run the engine in a garage, he took off his glasses and that makes me nervous jake gyllenhaal looking dude which cover is this must be nice to have healthcare I so appreciate that sam's wife has zero personality and is merely in the background, of no importance whatsoever compared to his kid named dean are the two impalas gonna meet in heaven????? vancouver is beautiful, or wherever this is at jared looks so cozy in that coat you can tell j2 really do love each other for real the majesty of that forest/that river got me choked up a bit, it's such a lonely thing. like. I can see what they were going for? like dean just... getting sick, falling off a ladder, getting in a car accident, etc etc would've been more potent, I think. the execution was not good. I'm not that unhappy though. it's all right. eh. it's fine. the heartfelt message from the cast (what's left of them....) and the crew was sweet. I want to know what they were intending to do? I feel like you can definitely feel the weight of COVID fucking this up which is genuinely upsetting. sam gets like 50 years of being free of dean I GUESS???? perhaps the only way to break the cycle.

at least there was no sexual assault in this episode. i have definitely watched way worse episodes of this show. it's like. twee. but I can't be mad at these guys especially with how much I know jared in particular has been struggling with the state of the world this year but jensen talked about it with rosenbaum on his show too. 2020 has been rough. like. at least they filmed it. whatever. I feel like I get what they were trying to do even if circumstances meant it wasn't really pulled off. it seems like they were supposed to have a big cast reunion and the pandemic took the wind completely out of their sails. this feels incredibly tacked on. 15x19 would've been a much better place to stop. I feel like I just read andrew dabb's notes. I get what they were trying to go for but they didn't pull it off. I thought it was gonna be a lot worse tbh in summary: EHHHHHHHHH

#s15e20

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astarlightmonbebe · 5 years ago

Text

~DMing the Wrong Person; Stray Kids Hyung Line~

Bang Chan

So, Chan is a music producer and he has around 300k followers on Instagram

You honestly only followed him because he was good looking (yeah that’s a bit shallow but you actually bothered to listen to some of his beats and now you stan his music, too)

You’re just a chill fan of his, only have his post and story notifs on because you like to keep up but you’re not obsessive

Anyways so you found this really funny post with some screenshots of his recent live (which was at like midnight...and Chan was pretty tired...you love memes, you had to take advantage of him)

Chan’s insta is @prod_cb97 and you’re just scrolling through your contacts to ‘p’ to send to your friend, but it’s late and you accidentally click Chan’s name and send it before realizing your mistake

Of course you’re like ‘omg, I have to unsend that now’, but by the time you’ve exited over to it, it already says ‘seen’???

Cue: major freakout because what the heck is happening, why is he looking at your messages

AND THEN IT SHOWS HE’S TYPING?

911 is this a drill it’s 2 a.m. in the morning

He finally sends a message, ‘ik i’m a meme why do you guys bully me like this’

And you’re like; ‘jkdahfds I’M SO SORRY I’LL ESCORT MYSELF OUT’

But he’s all ‘noo, I was kidding’

Then he also adds; ‘those are high quality memes, I saved them’

Like, please, Chan, those memes were so ugly and you both knew it

You don’t know what else to say so you end up being all; ‘it’s two a.m., you should be sleeping !! us fans want you to be well rested :)’ and it sounds so weird???

You’re not that big of the fan...

It takes him a couple minutes, but he responds; ‘music doesn’t sleep :), but thank you for the concern!’

How is he so cute and cool at the same time...you’re a little bit starstruck because you’re follower account waves at 502 and his has a big ‘k’ on the end

You decide it’s time to get sleep, but then he sends you !! another !! message !!

‘Well...you know all about me, can I know a little bit about you? Anyone who creates such wholesome memes is worth getting to know’

Hmm, it almost sounds like a pickup line, but you’re not crazy

(okay, maybe a little, because you respond back with probably a little too much information than he had wanted and/or expected)

‘hi, I’m y/n and I’m just a uni student who likes way too many groups and people, I’m an art major at my college...’

He probably didn’t need to know that, you should stop, definitely

He replies back with three laughing emojis

Laughing emojis???? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??

You panic and say; ‘why are you laughing at me???!!!!’

‘oh...I’m sorry if that offended you, I just wasn’t expecting your present life story’.

Oh. You feel bad now. He was just being a nice person :(((.

‘No...I’m the one who is sorry.’

There is silence

It says ‘seen’ but he’s not typing?

Oh gosh you messed up for real this time

Ahhhhhh who let you be on Instagram at two a.m. again?????

Then, out of the darkness of that ‘seen’, there comes the sweetest words you’ve ever seen.

‘Tbh I actually was really touched at those memes because I sometimes really feel like I’m only appreciated for being handsome and not for my music...but you really made me feel like a real music person who even has memes made for them, and it made me happy 💗’

You’re over here in a puddle of tears because literally you feel like a fake fan since you don’t really keep up with him and you were so shallow in the beginning.

What comes out of your fingers is; ‘haha wow. that’s so sad because honestly you’re amazing and I have mega respect for you for being so young and doing all this stuff, also living off two hours of sleep (don’t do that). So my tbh is that you’re awesome and I’m not and like...2 a.m. feels???’

Someone stop you before you fully word vomit all over this conversation

Yet, he replies with a ‘:)’

After five minutes, the ‘typing’ icon pops up again, and he sends; ‘i hope we can talk more, y/n’

Uhhhh heck yeah you would love that, Chan would probably regret it when he learns you’re a mess all the time, but anyways!!!

‘me too’ you opt to say, and then; ‘but first, we should both sleep’

Chan likes your message; ‘we have an agreement’ he says, and then his online flag disappears, leaving you smiling at your phone.

Kim Woojin

Woojin actually goes to the same college as you

You have a few mutual friends and at a meet up one day you all exchanged numbers and instagram handles

Though you unfollowed a lot of those people, you personally found Woojin very cute and he posted song covers with his guitar too! and as you know, you’re a big music fan :) so you kept on following him

And he kept following you! You guys even comment on each other’s posts sometimes and join lives, as well as say hello to each other on campus

So maybe you started having an interest in him...but who’s to say?

Anyways one day you’re just bored and looking through insta stories instead of working on that big assignment that requires way to much work

Woojin’s posted a clip of a coming up cover on his story and you’re all like ‘oh that’s super cool’

Yet you have no courage to tell him that, so you’re just swiping past again when you’re sweaty fingers are all like ‘oh we would rather slide up instead of go right’ and suddenly you’ve sent a 100 sticker to him?

You’ve done what now?

You’re blessing instagram for being able to unsend things, but he has, once again, already seen it

It’s just your luck, really

‘thx so much’ he replies after liking your story response

‘ahaha...np’ you say, then add tentatively, ‘you’re so good at music, like you’re voice is so beautiful??’

‘aww, thank you~’ he says, and you let out a breath because you think the crisis has been averted, but suddenly...

‘you’re actually so good yourself! I really love your art, you’re super talented!’

(you personally think you SUCK at art but like,,,if Woojin thinks you’re good you must be a little, right?)

‘thanks but I’m not that good’ you reply with a laughing emoji

He sends you angry emojis next! and you’re like ??? what did I do wrong??

You wait anxiously as he’s typing

‘y/n, believe me when I say you and you’re art is so breathtaking’

It’s so short but...so good...you’re heart...is fluttering

Unsure of what to say, you like his message and send some soft heart emojis, unable to convey the emotion you feel right now

He sends a heart emoji right back, along with a blushy face

(what does that mean???)

You send one more heart and then the conversation is over, but you have a feeling that maybe something new has started as well

Maybe

Lee Minho

Minho is a famous model under JYP entertainment, and his handle is @youknow_itsminho

Firstly, you’re in love with his aesthetic, because every model picture he posts is like looking at an angel without wings.

Secondly, he always goes live all the time and it’s with his cats

People who respect and love their pets??? Yes.

Lives is how it happens, actually

You’re clicking around on Instagram, watching his live, and a notification from your friend comes in. You click on it, but your phone shorts out suddenly.

When it turns back on, it opens back up to your messages, so you quickly type out a response ‘lol’ and hit send.

It sends...but, ummm...that was not the convo you were having with your friend.

In fact, it’s to someone you’ve never even had a convo with

You quickly check the handle and, omg, it’s Minho’s account djshjkad!

When you clicked on the notification, you’re finger must have accidentally hit his account name instead.

‘At least he’s live still, so he probably won’t notice and doesn’t bother to check...’ you thought to yourself, because you were sure many people tried to talk to him since he had almost one million followers.

Haha...right?

So you go to sleep, turn off your phone and put it face down

But you forgot to turn off your ringer

At three in the morning it goes off right in your ear, really loudly

You’re already pissed at being awake and still half asleep, so when you see it’s an Instagram notification, you automatically assume it’s your friends and reply as you would to them without bothering to read the message.

‘WHY ARE YOU GUYS UP AT THREE A.M., LET ME SLEEP FOR GOODNESS SAKE I’M GOING TO BEAT YOU UP TOMORROW’

Not your finest moment,...but please, you need your beauty sleep

With that, you roll over and go back to sleep

In the morning, you wake up and go check Instagram, like you do every morning

You check your pms, but the top one shocks you so much you have to blink several times to make sure you’re not dreaming.

Minho??? He saw your ‘lol’?

Ahh...as it turns out he saw much more than just ‘lol’.

Remind you to never respond to notifications at three a.m. x.x

Then-this dude- sends you a selfie he took from snapchat or whatever with the caption ‘woken up at three a.m. from my fans’

Yes??? That’s you??? You’re sorry???

‘I’m sorry about that but dang man, no need to be so salty...’; you send

Also, you realize as you’re looking through instagram, he posted the snapshots of your message to him on his story with all these laughing emojis...THIS BOY NOW YOU’RE MAD

I mean he crossed out the handle and profile picture but you know that’s you and, really, that’s what matters right now

So you dm him again; ‘hey did you really need to post that I DIDN’T THINK I WAS THAT FUNNY’

More laughing emojis

You’re about ready to snap, but he sends you another picture with ‘i’m sorry’ scrawled over his beautiful face

You can’t help but smile at that, especially when he adds ‘i’ll talk to you tomorrow?’

‘to clear up this misunderstanding of course :)’ he is quick to add

‘of course’; you say, smiling as you log off

Seo Changbin

Changbin is your best friend’s scary older brother

He followed you first so you followed him back for courtesy’s sake

Plus you like to laugh at his bucket hat posts...

The bucket hat posts is how it all starts

He posts another one and you’re sending it to your friend to laugh about how he looks so soulless, but...ahah...their contacts are right next to each other and maybe you accidentally clicked his?

You’re really not sure how it happened, except the message is sent to Changbin and definitely not your friend

And wow, reading it back, that sounds so mean, especially considering you sent it to the person the message was about

He’s seen it

Oh...wow...you’re really screwed

You immediately try and send an apology that goes something along the lines of ‘I AM SO SO SORRY I SWEAR I DIDN’T MEAN FOR THAT TO COME OFF SO MEAN OR ANYTHING REALLY’

He sees it again

And leaves you like that for a whole hour

Where you just kind of turn your phone off and try and do something else but the anxiety keeps you checking your phone constantly

Finally he says ‘I’m used to people making fun of me and my hat, no big deal’

But that’s actually kind of sad, so you’re all like ‘:(((’

And he’s all ‘is this conversation done’

Which kind of slaps but like it’s all your fault anyways so whatever

You find some hug gif and send it to him, and then you get radio silence before he actually sends a ‘thanks’

Hmm...you can’t read sarcasm online...

‘are you being sarcastic?’ you ask

‘no, that made me smile’ he tells you and wow, you weren’t expecting him to be quite so touched by a random gif you found

‘i’m glad!’ you send him, and he actually sends a smiley face?

(he uses emojis? in all your years you had never pegged Seo Changbin as the emoji sending type of person. surprises happen, you guess)

‘I really am very sorry though :(’ you send again because you’re REALLY sorry

‘you’re forgiven, so don’t sweat over it haha’ he tells you

You guess that’s that but you still feel really bad about the whole situation, like you never thought you were a mean person, but that was pretty mean of you

You don’t want to bother him by apologizing again

So you just say ‘ah okay, I won’t~I hope you have a good day’

And he’s like ‘you too’

You can’t tell if he’s just using etiquette or if he really means it, but you’ll take what you can get

(you also never make fun of him or anyone ever again, having learned your lesson)

(your friend also finds out about this exchange and mercilessly teases both of you)

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zipp0flare · 5 years ago

Text

Infection part 1

(So, this is an old relic piece back from when I first started playing Left 4 Dead. I loved the character and infected designs so much back then (still do, tbh) that I actually made several characters, whom I still love to this day. I only have stories for two of them, back from my deviantArt days, which is why this may look familiar. Anywho, this is the origin story for my Hunter, Luke (based off a GaiaOnline avatar I made one day, which is why the design choice is kinda funky.))

The rave that was so often filled to the brim with people on Saturday nights was close to being empty, mainly only filled with the loyal regulars that spent their free nights dancing amongst the music and flashing lights. A young male made his way to a small group of men gathered around the bar, some of which gave him surprised greetings.

"Whoa, Luke! Didn't think we'd see you here!" A man with a large, orange dyed mohawk called as he motioned the other male over. 'Luke' merely scoffed and sat down next to the man, as well a second man, wearing a ridiculous, tie dyed ski cap. "You know you look like a moron with that on, right Mal?" Luke asked, to which he received a punch in the arm from 'Mal'.

"You don't look any better. What's with the goggles, and the hood? Hell, what are you doing here in the first place?" Luke gave Mal a scowl, which only grew when the first man piped up; "Yeah, he's right. I mean, you have heard about the Green Flu going around, right?"

Luke leveled a glare at the man. "I could ask you the same question. I could ask everyone here the same question. I came here because I had planned to ever since Tuesday. But it looks like the hype about this flu has caused everyone to run for home with their tail between their legs."

Luke coughed into his arm, causing his two companions to inch back a little farther. "Damn, did you come here with it? What the fuck were you thinking?!"

"Vince, I don't have the flu, my throat's just been sore. You can calm down." Mal and Vince still looked leery. "I think you should go back home. You don't know if you're not infected, and none of us want to come down with the thing. I mean, I've heard some people are dying from it." Vince actually sounded somewhat worried, though it was hard to tell if the worry was for his friend, or for himself.

"That's just the media making this whole thing look worse than it did. Remember their last, so-called 'epidemic'?" Mal choked back a laugh. "Yeah, you boarded yourself up in your apartment for a week and a half. You thought the world was ending or something." Mal may have controlled his laughter, but Vince had begun to guffaw at the memory.

"And nothing happened, which made me look like a damn idiot."

"Yeah, you did look like a fool when you finally came out of your 'house of safety' with the fire axe you practically stole from your apartment building."

"Exactly. So, just like nothing happened then, everything's just going to go over in a week or so, and everyone will soon forget about the Green Flu." Luke raised a hand into the air with three fingers up, and waved to the bartender, earning a nod as the woman behind the bar got to work.

"So... you're sure your not infected, right?" Vince asked cautiously. "Yes. I know I'm not infected. I haven't even been near someone who's sick. Though..." His face scrunched up in disgust, to which his two friend gave him odd looks. "You remember my weird ass neighbor? Who lives in the apartment to the right of mine?"

"You mean crazy old hag Meri-something?" Vince received a nod. "What the hell did she do this time? Start up a story about her toe jam again?" Mal had to keep from retching when he heard Vince, even though he hadn't been there for whatever this story was, unlike poor friends. "No, not another toe jam story. I went to get my mail this morning and saw her walking my direction. I've gotten to the point where I wait for her to start going through whatever crap she's received until I leave. I stood there for two minutes and she didn't start rummaging through her mail. Instead, the crazy bat reaches over and bites me in the arm!"

"The fuck?! I knew she was out of her mind, but biting people?"

"I have no idea what was going through her freaky mind, but it was hard enough to break the skin." Luke rubbed his bandaged arm, currently concealed under his black arm warmers. "What did you do?" Mal asked, knowing that the story couldn't have ended there.

"I immediately elbowed her in the stomach out of reflex. She whined like a dog and took off after that."

"She broke the skin? Did you disinfect and all that crap?" Luke nodded. "I pretty much bathed it in rubbing alcohol, which burned like hell I might add."

Mal and Vince still looked disgusted with the story, thankful that neither of them had a out-of-their-mind neighbor that went around biting people. "Maybe you should head back home." Vince piped up after a few moments of silence. "If she bit you and all, maybe she's infected?"

"I'm sure the cause of that is from being out of her mind. I'm fine." Luke stressed the word 'fine'. "So, you wanted to come here on a Saturday, mainly only because we always do. You also think that all of this is just the media hyping things up a bit. I still don't see you going out, risking getting sick. You're the one who's always against that kind of-"

"It's nothing!" Luke exclaimed, startling his two friends, along with other people that were close by. "It's... just your normal flu."

"Dude... what the hell has your panties in a bunch? You're never this worked up." There was only silence from Luke, who seemed to almost be refusing to answer Mal's question.

"Maddie's sick." Those two words were so quiet that Luke's friends almost didn't catch what Luke had said. Maddie, Madeline, was Luke's five-year-old sister; she meant the world to Luke. "Maddie's sick with it. And if I start freaking out about this whole thing, I"m basically telling myself that my little sister's going to die." He bit his lower lip. "So, all of this is just nothing, alright?"

"... Sorry, I.. I had no idea, man." Mal apologized. "How's she doing?"

"She's currently in quarentine with CEDA. Or, that's what I'm being told." Luke coughed into his arm again, a bit more harshly this time. "I'm not sick, you can drop it." Luke knew what his friends were thinking and his words shut them up before they could say anything.

The bartender came back with his drink, but Luke could tell that she was keeping her distance as well. "Damn, why the hell is everyone acting like this.." He growled. Luke was hardly ever this agitated but Mal and Vince took it as him simply being worked up about his younger sister.

There was silence amongst the friends once more (minus Luke's coughing every few minutes) none of them knowing what to say. The silence was broken by a loud swearing from Luke. "They need to turn down these fucking lights. My eyes are burning from them!" His friends cringed, not expecting Luke's outburst. "Uh... the lights are the same as they always are. You sure you're oka-"

"I'm fine! Dammit, I'm fine!" Luke held his injured arm close to him, his fingers digging into it. Vince simply held his hands in front of him as if to guard himself from Luke's verbal lashing.

Luke's coughing seemed to have quickly and steadily grown worse, and he was beginning to notice a slightly red stain decorating the inside of his arm. Maybe he was seeing things though, his eyesight seemed to steadily be growing worse, and it was hard to think of anything with the pounding headache that had suddenly overwhelmed him.

Luke could barely make out his friend's worried looks, only seeing their lips moving while no sound came from their mouths, but the music in the background seemed to only be getting louder and louder, the noise assaulting his eardrums and causing his headache to grow worse.

As his eyes began to slowly bleed was when he fell backward and off of his seat, his head making a sickening crack as it hit the floor. Luke could barely see now, barely think, barely even keep his eyes open. "Holy shit! Someone call an ambulance, or something!" Mal and Vince had only become more and more concerned for Luke, giving him questions and suggestions, both of which went unanswered. None of that, though, compared to the panic going through their systems when their friend suddenly fell off the seat, bleeding out of his eyes.

"C'mon, Luke! You've been through worse, stay with us!" Vince exclaimed with frustration, trying to make things not at bad as they seemed, as he crouched down next to his friend. The bartender had already called 911, though Vince and Mal were wondering if it would do any good now.

When Luke slowly started to come to, letting out groans and what sounded like low growling, the duo's hope skyrocketed. It came crashing down, though, when Luke suddenly rolled off of his back and onto his stomach, crouching and growling at his 'friends'.

"Whoa, calm down, buddy... everything's alright.. you're going to be okay.." Neither of them had anymore time to say anything before 'Luke' pounced and attacked them both.

When the ambulance finally arrived, along with several people in hazmat suits from CEDA, they found the rave a bloody, gruesome mess. Several bodies were scattered on the floor and against the bar's counter. All of them were viciously torn into. "We need to block this place off. Don't let anything come out or into here." One of the CEDA workers commanded. While several people rushed to various parts of the club, a lone ambulance worker looked out at the horrific scene and sighed. His eyes turned down to see a man at his feet, with a large, orange mohawk, who looked even more torn into than the rest of the bodies at the scene. He didn't seem to pay much mind to the smeared blood trail that led away from the body, simply assuming that it was caused by the thing that had caused all of this. "God, this sickness is horrid..."

#left 4 dead #l4d #l4d hunter #left 4 dead hunter #infected OC #Luke is lowkey me tbh #Oh i may be sick?#still gonna go to work lol #I’llbe fine!#I wasnt fine #neither was he #A Hunter and a Smoker Walk Into a Bar

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seagreen-meets-grey · 6 years ago

Text

When you’re close to me

After the realization hit her, it was impossible for Astrid to look at him the same way anymore. (Aka being a teenager and having a crush on your best friend is the best set-up for prom night.)

[Part 1: Revelations] [Part 2: Chicken Dance] [Part 3: Night Owls]

(The quoted song is “Sway” by Blue October.)

Crossposted on ao3 and ff.net

Astrid didn’t know exactly when it started.

She remembered lunch in the cafeteria, trying to squeeze in some homework, and a slightly nasal laugh when the math equations didn’t make sense to her and she let that out in a menacing tirade under her breath. She remembered wondering why it had pleasantly filled her ears, why it had made her look up.

She remembered standing in the school’s hallway shortly after last period, students jostling around, a cacophony of girly laughter, loud testosterone-filled exclamations and the general buzz of conversation surrounding her. She remembered turning away from her locker, ready to head out, and catching a glimpse of auburn hair in the crowd. She remembered smiling and waiting for him to catch up to her so they could walk out together.

She remembered her smile growing at every new text, remembered her sudden awareness of how much fun it was to hang out together.

But most of all, she remembered that one Saturday before finals.

It had been a busy couple of weeks, crammed with last-minute papers and presentations, long nights filled with caffeine and frustration. She was nothing but an ambitious student, always determined to ace every test coming her way, to prove herself and excel in every subject. Astrid Hofferson had goals, and she’d do everything in her power to reach those goals. That meant a very rigorous studying schedule, no distractions allowed. That again involved not being able to see her friends outside of school. She had no time for smoothies and movies, for afternoons in the park, the cove or on Heather’s couch, and certainly no time for Hiccup Haddock. Which sucked, because he was her best friend – the best she’s ever had, if anyone asked her.

She had first met him in kindergarten, but never really had had anything to do with him. Only when they got paired up for a project in freshman year – the classic way of getting to know people you never talked to – and after the initial rounds of awkward silence, did she have a real conversation with him. Up to that point, she had thought they couldn’t be more different people and that she couldn’t be less interested in the person that was Hiccup Haddock. But when he mentioned his dog with a missing tail and she told him stories about the parakeet she’d had as a kid and the puppy she had recently adopted, the conversation just kept flowing. Not always smoothly, but that didn’t matter. She liked talking to him. She found out he had a strong passion for what he loved and what he thought was right. He deeply cared for the people in his life and would do anything for them. Besides, it turned out they shared a lot of interests, and that made becoming friends even easier. And being friends with Hiccup was just that – easy. It was as if they clicked on another level, able to read each other like a book. There was no one who Astrid rather spent time with. He always made her forget about her troubles, but unfortunately finals – and therefore studying – were her troubles at the time.

Astrid groaned and buried her face in her physics textbook. She was lying on her stomach on the ground in her room, every surface covered with binders, notepads, textbooks, post-its, and index cards – the aftermath of a whole Saturday morning filled to the brim with studying, right after a short few hours of sleep preceded by a Friday afternoon and night study session.

Her brain was overflowing with equations, bullet points, half-sentences and phrases that refused to fall into context. The more she read and reviewed the less sense everything made in her head. Astrid sighed. She needed a breather. Placing her textbook aside, careful so the post-its didn’t shift out of place, she reached for her phone. She lay on her back and, holding her phone above her face, skimmed through various group chats. They all basically said the same; people were either studying or procrastinating, asking for help in several subjects, and the overall vibe screamed for salvation in the form of finals to be over already or a distraction of any shape or form.

Astrid was just grinning at a few memes sent by the twins when her phone suddenly buzzed several times from incoming texts, prompting her to drop it on her face.

Hiccup [11:48am]: your brain melted yet? i think i’m seeing smoke signals coming from your house

Hiccup [11:48am]: or did you try to make lunch and the house is burning down

Hiccup [11:48am]: do i need to call 911

Hiccup [11:49am]: where are your parents

Hiccup [11:49am]: omg did you finally snap from all the studying and killed them?

Rubbing her aching nose where her phone had met her face a moment ago, she typed back.

Astrid [11:50am]: Who do you think I’m cooking? ;)

Hiccup answered with a series of shocked emojis. Astrid grinned and imagined him placing a hand on his chest, pseudo-shocked look on his face. She rolled back onto her stomach, eyes set to the little dots indicating he was typing.

Hiccup [11:51am]: tbh i’m not surprised

Hiccup [11:51am]: always knew it was just a matter of time until someone died at your hands

Hiccup [11:52am]: how did you do it? axe or feeding them your version of an edible meal?

She could easily picture him gesticulating, waving his hands around, never able to keep them still while talking. It was kind of charming.

Astrid [11:52am]: Axe, of course. My cooking might be basic, but it doesn’t kill people.

Hiccup [11:53am]: biggest

Hiccup [11:53am]: lie

Hiccup [11:53am]: ever

Hiccup [11:53am]: hofferson

Astrid was about to reply when another text came in.

Hiccup [11:54am]: HOLY SHIT IS THAT WHY YOUR STEW WAS SO BAD? WHERE YOUR NEIGHBORS IN IT???!!

She rolled her eyes. A few months ago, she had made dinner for her friends. She had tried to follow her mother’s recipe but with her own twists, wanted to create something new, something originally Astrid – and, apparently, had succeeded. Only that her friends were rather spitting it back out on their plates than praising her cooking skills. The only one who at least tried and gulped down a few spoonfuls was Hiccup, and she loved him for it, despite the following teasing she had to endure.

Astrid [11:55am]: Shut up, Hiccup. I’m trying to study here.

Hiccup [11:55am]: how’s that going

Hiccup [11:56am]: have you even eaten anything yet

Astrid sighed. At his mention of stew, her stomach had growled viciously. Aside from half a croissant early in the morning, she’d had nothing to eat yet. She’d been so absorbed in studying that she hadn’t even noticed her parents leaving for their shopping day. Just one more chapter, she told herself while reopening her textbook, then she’d look for something to eat in the kitchen.

She put her phone away, not giving Hiccup the chance to further tease her on the subject of food. She would never admit this to him, but he was right. Astrid didn’t know how to cook, no matter how many cookbooks and articles she read, no matter how often she tried even the simplest meals. She was a lost cause. This was the reason why her motivation to look for something edible wasn’t necessarily high. She knew for sure there were no leftovers, and the fridge was likely mostly empty anyway; her parents would buy groceries at the end of their day at the mall.

Forcing herself back to her textbook, she pushed the notion of food to the back of her mind. Soon she was buried deep in her notes, trying desperately to press new information into her brain. When she stared at an equation and the numbers and symbols started dancing all over the page, she groaned in frustration. She needed to know this stuff by next Friday, and there was still so much more to revise.

She got up and went to the bathroom, filling the sink with cold water which she then dunked her head in several times. But it was of no use, it wasn’t ice water, of course this wouldn’t work. The only thing it did was to make her aware of how thirsty she was. While towel-drying her hair, she trudged down the stairs to grab herself a bottle of water. A quick check of the fridge confirmed her suspicion that there was basically no real food in this house. She found a few crackers in the cupboard and resigned herself to her dry excuse of a lunch when she heard the bell ring.

Bag of crackers in hand, she went to open the door and was greeted by a pair of familiar green eyes and a lopsided smile.

“Hey,” Hiccup said. His hair was as tousled as always and she noticed he was wearing an old green sweater that he only dug out on lazy weekends. Astrid didn’t have to ask if he had opened a textbook at all today.

“Hiccup, you’re smart,” she said in lieu of a greeting. “How do I restart my brain?”

Following her into the house and stealing a few of her crackers, which earned him a ferocious glare, he shrugged. “That’s exactly why I’m here.” He threw a cracker in his mouth and nearly missed. “I read the smoke signals.”

Astrid gave him a punch on the arm. “That’s for wasting my last food ration. Now I’m going to starve!”

Rubbing his arm, he motioned his head toward his car that was parked outside. “Then let’s go get some food.”

She crossed her arms, empty bag crinkling in her hand. “I can’t. I have to study.”

“We both know you’re not going to come far like this. Come on, I know you need a break.”

Astrid sighed. They both knew he was right.

“And something to eat,” he added when her stomach chimed in on the discussion. “See? Now let’s go before you kill and eat me too.”

Astrid bit her lip. She knew he wasn’t going to drop this. And a short break from studying could surely recharge her concentration.

“Alright,” she gave in with a sigh and put the bag in the trash, grabbed her jacket and followed Hiccup back outside. “But I lied, I didn’t cook my parents. They’re out shopping.”

“In that case, I’m even more scared, in such proximity with you when you’ve clearly not yet let out your daily dose of violence.”

“It’s not violence,” she protested, “it’s communication!”

“If it is, people should even be more afraid of you. You have some strong opinions.”

Astrid grinned and shut the car door. “Hell yeah, I do.”

“So communicate with me then,” Hiccup said while turning onto the street. “What do you want to eat?”

“Anything that’s not a dry cracker.”

“Or stew.”

She punched his arm lightly and he glared at her. “I’m driving here, you insane muttonhead.”

“You’re the muttonhead,” she retorted brightly before plugging his stereo cable in her phone and selecting their special car playlist. The songs that made it in were a bunch of shared favorite songs, songs they listened to on longer car rides together, songs that had a special meaning to them, or songs that were some sort of inside joke between them. They referred to it as their car playlist, but Astrid thought of it only as her Hiccup playlist. Whenever she felt down, she listened to it, finding comfort in the memories it held and the promise of their friendship that came with it.

While the music blasted through the speakers, Hiccup hummed along.

“How did you know?” Astrid asked as he turned onto the main road.

“Hm?”

“That I needed a break from studying.”

Hiccup glanced at her before turning his eyes back on the road. “Like I said, I read the smoke signals from your brain. I call it,” he made a grand gesture with one arm, “Astrintuition.”

“That’s not a thing, you dork.”

“It is now, I just named it.”

Astrid looked out the window to hide her smile. Of course he knew. He knew that she would spend her entire weekend preparing for finals and that she’d prioritize that over everything else. That’s why he decided to come by and make sure she ate something and still saw the sun. A fond feeling spread in her chest.

They ended up at Pizza Hut where they shared their favorite pizza, a Cheesy Crust Chicken Supreme. Hiccup watched in awe as she devoured slice after slice and when he exclaimed that he was stuffed, she ate the rest of his half too. She might not look like it, he thought, but that girl could rival his father when it came to eating. Astrid was so busy with her pizza that she missed the affectionate look he gave her.

On the way back to her place, the sun came out. It hit Hiccup’s hair at just the right angle to create a fiery halo around his head. Astrid rolled down her window to enjoy the warm breeze.

When their playlist jumped to a loud and fast song, Hiccup amped up the volume. He and Astrid automatically started duetting, jerking their heads along to the fast parts and swaying in sync to the slower ones. It had taken them a lot of tries to finally get all the lyrics right in the proper pace, and even now one of them sometimes fell out, provoking a snort from the other while they spluttered to jump back in.

Astrid loved moments like these. It was her and Hiccup, a team, enjoying each other’s presence. When the song faded out, their last chuckle dying down with it, she propped up her elbow and leaned her head on her hand. She closed her eyes, felt the wind in her hair, on her skin. She smiled when she recognized the next song, her favorite from three summers ago. Silently mouthing the lyrics along, she got struck by a feeling of utter contentment, accompanied by a swelling in her chest while familiar, memory-laden streets around her where dipped in sunlight.

Forget about the trouble Forget about the drama Cause I ain't Casanova Baby I can dance for days This time with you Is just amazing in so many ways

She looked over at Hiccup who slightly bobbed his head to the music, his eyes on the road, a small smile gracing his features, the sunlight dancing in his hair. She couldn’t stop looking at him. It was as if she was suddenly seeing him with new eyes. She felt a swoop in her stomach. In the light, she could make out slight stubble on his chin. His fringe and thick eyebrows cast shadows over his face. She had never really noticed how handsome he was.

Feeling a blush heat up her cheeks, she averted her eyes. Well, this is new, she thought.

For the rest of the day, she couldn’t really concentrate on anything and fell asleep much later than usual, confusion and strange new revelations keeping her awake until early in the morning.

From then on, she noticed the little things. The small touches that were suddenly too much, the glances, the dragged-out goodbyes, the increasing frequency of hugs that tended to linger a moment too long. She wondered why she had never noticed how green his eyes were, how much taller than her he had grown, or how broad his shoulders had become only in the last year.

Every day, she noticed it, noticed him more. And it only got worse over time.

When he looked at her, her heart skipped a beat or two. He invaded her thoughts regularly and often in the most inconvenient moments, like when she wanted to sleep or needed to pay attention during class. Astrid was in no way a sappy romantic. But every time the topic of love or romance was brought up even in the slightest, her mind wandered to Hiccup, much to her chagrin. They were friends. She didn’t want to ruin that with sudden, stupid feelings.

Eventually, she came to admit to herself that she had a crush on him (just a small one really, no big deal). It was when her grandmother asked for a nice photo of her and Astrid sorted through her pictures on her laptop. After an hour or so she suddenly noticed she had moved from looking at pictures of herself to staring at pictures of Hiccup instead.

It took her a while to come to terms with it, before she tried to block it out and hoped it went away on its own. When that didn’t work, she changed tactics. Going out with someone else would certainly help her forget about her crush. But whenever she tried to find a guy she’d go on a date with, the qualities she looked for in them were traits she associated with Hiccup. In comparison to him, everyone else quickly faded into the background.

By the time she gave up changing targets, she could no longer deny to herself that this crush was indeed not small at all. And her plan to not tell anyone so that it couldn’t become a bigger deal than it was – and it really was a big deal – failed spectacularly when Heather caught her staring at Hiccup from afar and asked her if she ever noticed how she wouldn’t shut up about him. Astrid tried denying it at first, but there was no fooling Heather.

“Hiccup this, Hiccup that. Astrid, you couldn’t be more obvious.”

Sometimes, though, Astrid was glad that Heather knew. She would do her all kinds of little favors, like “accidentally” forgetting something in her locker when the three of them were on their way to class, saving Hiccup a seat that happened to be right next to Astrid, or cancelling at the last minute when they decided to go to the movies so Astrid and Hiccup were to themselves. Although Astrid loved her for doing that, it didn’t help her frustration about her one-sided crush.

Heather, however, had a different opinion. She believed that Hiccup had feelings for her, too, based on the way he acted around Astrid. Despite her hopes that her friend was right, Astrid nevertheless argued that Hiccup had always been like that since the beginning of their friendship; Heather just hadn’t been there to see it since she’d come to their school later. Besides, Hiccup was the one always stressing that they were friends (best friends, but still just friends). Heather would just look at her like she was missing something obvious.

Time went on like this, with Heather always trying to nudge Hiccup and Astrid in the right direction and telling her to just talk to him or make a move herself. And it’s not like Astrid didn’t try. She gave Hiccup signals all the time, like shuffling closer and leaning against him while they were watching a movie, dropping comments here and there about the two of them together, touching him on the arm or chest or hand whenever she got the chance to – not that she minded at all – and even going out for ice cream on Valentine’s Day. But either he didn’t notice the signs, like the dork that he was, or he read them wrong. And there was still the possibility that he wasn’t into her at all – a notion Astrid hated but had to admit could be true.

Her frustration got especially bad when prom rolled around. While she normally wouldn’t even think twice about the ridiculous need to find a prom date that other girls seemed to have, a part of her still hoped Hiccup would ask her while she tried to work up the nerve to ask him herself. But whenever she opened her mouth to bring up the topic, she chickened out. If she asked him and he said no, she didn’t want that to affect their friendship, didn’t want to jeopardize whatever it was that made their whole dynamic so easy and comfortable. And it wasn’t like she needed a prom date to have a good time with him, anyway.

She kept going back and forth with her reasonings, caught between her idea of simply having fun with her friends without conforming to high school society norms, and the inevitable pull Hiccup had on her, creating her desire to be close to him, closer than she was now. And she just couldn’t find a solution.

Astrid was sitting in the cafeteria, picking at her vegetables, while she glared daggers at the girl who was currently talking to Hiccup on the other side of the room. The girl was tall, blonde and pretty, and she had her hand on his arm while she threw her hair back laughing at something he said.

“I know cafeteria food is awful, but even those peas don’t deserve what you’re doing to them,” Heather said next to her, watching as her friend tortured squashy peas and radiated jealousy like a miniature Chernobyl. When Astrid only grunted in response, Heather sighed. “Just ask him already. I don’t know how much longer I can take this unnecessary pining.” She snorted. “Or Snotlout.”

Astrid rolled her eyes. “Don’t remind me.” She’d been asked to prom nine times by now, eight of those by Snotlout (the other one by an overachieving freshman named Gustav).

She cut into her steak, pretending she wasn’t secretly watching Hiccup and that girl. Her plate made a horrible sound when she got through the steak and ran her knife over the cheap china. She and Heather cringed at the bloodcurdling noise and Astrid mumbled an apology.

When she looked up the next time, that girl was gone. Hiccup came towards their table with his food tray and sat down opposite them.

“That’s the fifth time this week that I’ve been asked to prom,” he said. “Is there some kind of prank going on?”

Astrid scowled. She only knew about three. “If there is, I’m going to kill the person responsible,” she mumbled and chewed on her steak. Hiccup frowned at her sour mood but didn’t comment on it.

“Hiccup, do you even know how popular you are?” Heather asked him. “And you’re an eyecatcher. Girls notice you.” Hiccup looked at her as if she’d grown a second head. “It’s true, just ask Astrid.”

Astrid almost choked on her (awful) steak and felt Hiccup’s eyes burning through the side of her face. “Yeah well, kind of,” she stammered, fighting the blush growing on her cheeks while she avoided his gaze, “I mean, everyone gets more handsome when they grow up, not specifically you, but everyone, you know, which doesn’t mean that you didn’t, I mean… You’re fine, I guess.” She shrugged and stuffed half her steak into her mouth so that she couldn’t start rambling again like that.

“What Astrid’s trying to say here is that I’m right.”

A quick glance told Astrid that Hiccup was still frowning at her weird behavior. “Are you alright?”

She gave him a strained smile and swallowed the ball of dry meat in her mouth. “I’m fine.” He didn’t seem convinced but didn’t question her further either. Instead, he went back to complaining.

“I just can’t catch a break from turning down prom invitations. Which I most certainly never thought I’d ever even have to do in the first place.”

Heather took from that that he’d immediately said no to all of them. A smile grew on her face as an idea crossed her mind. This was a perfect opportunity.

“Hey, why don’t you guys go together?” she asked, looking back and forth between Astrid and Hiccup. Both of them simultaneously started to protest.

“It’s not like that.”

“We’re not… It’s not…”

“We don’t date.”

“Yeah, that’d be weird, because we’re just–”

“We’re just friends.”

“Yes, exactly.”

They were both blushing pretty hard, avoiding each other’s gazes. Heather rolled her eyes.

“Then just go as friends. That means you,” she pointed at Hiccup, “will be left alone by all those girls, and you,” she pointed at Astrid, “will get Snotlout off your back.”

Astrid pondered that for a moment and came to the conclusion that she liked that thought. She and Hiccup shared a look.

“Alright,” he said and gave her a lopsided smile. “Wanna go to prom?”

She tried not to break into a wide smile while she felt the familiar tingle in her stomach. “Sure,” she shrugged and went back to eating her cafeteria food which suddenly didn’t taste so bad anymore. Hiccup did the same, suppressing a grin himself. Heather just shook her head at them and sighed. Hopeless dorks.

#hiccstrid #httyd #ff #fanfiction #fluff #modern au #high school #prom #crush fluff stuff #two chickens in love #this wasn't supposed to be so long #teenagers amirite #pining #my fic #maja writes

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seventeencelcius · 6 years ago

Text

Coffee Shop! Joshua

after a horrible first paper that kicked off your finals season, you headed to your regualr coffee shop to continue studying after the closing hours of your college library

“17 Celcius” was the place you fondly regarded as your second home since you spent most of your time inside

especially when you needed a space to escape from your noisy rommates in the cramp dorm you were staying

you usually went there just before your 8am classes to receive your morning dose of caffeine or for any project discussions, but it was probably a first for you to arrive at this hour

you couldn’t really blame yourself because every time exams was round the corner, you automatically became a zombie by staying up all night studying and crashed in the afternoon while powering your night with additional zcoffee

while it was not unusual for you stay up late, your roomates had an issue since you were the one the kind who acted up as they studied,

which was sort of creepy to listen to when someone was trying to sleep so they ‘unofficially’ kicked you out of the dorm unless you were actually back to, you know, sleep

luckily for you, this place was opened 24 hours with the owner’s intention to attract college students who had a messed up sleeping schedule

or even to those who had their hearts broken at an odd hour and needed some warm hot chocolate to mend their soul

it was the cafè’s one and only policy to serve any customer without any questions asked regardless of the time and their appearance

having a sweeter tooth, you usually leaned toward drinks such as a caramel latte and a mocha

however, you already had a shitty enough day from pretty much flunking your test despite how much you had studied the week before and the stress from seemingly not being prepared enough for your other subjects

with those thoughts constantly running through your mind, you had forgotten to grab your wallet you had left on the library table

you could only pray hard that you could still find it in the morning since it was already closed by the time you remembered

you only had a few loose change to spare after digging around your tote bag but thankfully, it accumulated enough to get you the cheapest beverage on the menu - a black coffee

butter drinks weren’t exactly your favourite but you had to suck it up

you desperately needed that fix of caffeine to continue studying or you would have collapsed from fatigue in no given time

furthermore, the environment from the cafe was much better than the silent library

with the occasional sound from the coffee beans being grounded and roasted made it lively even with the lack of customers

you barely paid attention to the cash register as you dropped the amount to the cashier’s hands and muttered out your name

exhaustation was evident on your face and your mind was genuinely worn out from the amount of things you had to memorize for your upcoming tests

whoever was in the college exam board, you hated them with your entire heart, mind, body and soul

geez who in their right mind thought it would he a great idea to schedule all your exams back to back?!?!

pulling an all nighter for the last few days was seriously driving you mad and you felt that you couldn’t even hold a proper conversation without spitting out some theory in between

to add on to your frustration, none of yourlecturers were being helpful whenever you took the liberty to email them questions

what came back to you was usually “check the previous slides” or “I’m taking a break, contact me again at xxxx”

you couldn’t wait for finals to be over so you could be a normal, functioning human being again

a notification from your phone caught your attention and by the time you skimmed the first few lines, you were on the verge of a mental breakdown

you were close to hyperventilating as your palms become clammy

it was an email from the college board to notify all full scholarship holders that should they not reach the minimum requirements of 3.5 GPA for finals, their scholarship will immediately be revoked

you really didn’t need to be reminded by this constant nightmare and it felt as if your demons were closing in one b-

“Here’s your order. Enjoy!”

for a moment you panicked since it was accustomed for the barista to call your name and for you to collect your order, yet here this person was bringing it all the way to your secluded corner where your tower of lecture notes seemed to be covering your frame

“i didn’t order any of this???? Wasn’t it supposed to be a black coffee?”

glancing downwards, a chocolate chip cookie deocrated your table along with a drink that was clearly too milky to be a black coffee

also definitely more than $3 you paid for

you begin panicking when you looked up at the barista because were you THAT sleep deprevied that you somehow gave the wrong order??

your pupils dilated even more when your line of vision moved upwards, immediately distracted by the person infront of you

this was totally the worst day of your life

here was the probably the most handsome person you had ever laid your eyes on and you looked like you haven’t sleep in days with your panda eyebags and the hoodie you slept in

if looks could kill, you would probably be death by now

& wow if you were still alive, you were going to put a drink recommendation in the suggestion box called: Death by chocolate cause those eyes of his were more than just mesmerizing

considering you were a regular gere, thsi worker was most likely someone who only worked the midnight shift,

you guessed you needed to bug your friend who also worked here, Seungcheol, to know of his name

“oh, you looked like you needed it. don’t worry, it’s on the house. have strength and just endure a little more!”

you never deemed yourself as a particularly emotional person

sure there was the occasional outburst when you watched Hachiko or when Peter K. confessed love to Lara Jeans in To All The Boys I’ve Lived Before

but this, this was something else.

you didn’t know what struck you but you started crying

you would like to think it was because this situation too much for you to handle since you weren’t familiar with kindess during this bleak period of time known as exam season

yes, crying in an empty coffee shop at 1:15AM with the cute as heck barista standing right next to you

you had your fair shares of meltdowns in public before but most of the time, the crowd would just ignore you, with the belief that everyone goes through a hard time anyways so there wasn’t a need to pause their lives just to comfort a complete stranger

truth to be told, you thought the cute barista would just bolt through the entrance and call 911 or be like everyone else by giving your the cold shoulder treatment

to your surprise, you felt a warm hand patting your head before moving down to gently stroke your back in a rhythmic yet tender movement

“you will feel better after crying it all out.”

hearing his voice gave you more than just confort but you sought solace in both his words and presence

“i’m sorry *sniffs* e-exams ar-re jut ... so hard right now ..... i’m gonna fa—il and not-ot make it .... in my life ...”

the barista called your name, making you divert your full attention to him and tbh you were wondering how did he even know your name until you remembered you were the one who gave it when you ordered your drink lol

“you’re doing fine and I know you’re trying your best right now. That’s what most important.”

those words were all you needed for a smile to crack up and for your spirits to be lifted up

maybe what you needed all this while was an acknowledgement from others, to know that your hard work wasn’t going nowhere and that someone can see how much effort you are putting

“those are on the house so have faith in yourself and enjoy what you are doing!”

his encouragement had you lifting the corner of your lips to form a smile

sighing, you were sure the barista was only being nice to you because based on the fact that he looked like your age, he probably understood what you were going through and pitied you right from the start

to avoid being a food, you didn’t dare to think much about the encounter when you thanked him at the counter, cheeks reddened from your earlier outburst

you stuttered when you struggled with what to call him because you were rather embarrassed by the nickname of ‘cute barista’ you labelled him

“jisoo, but I usually let the people I like call me joshua so you can call me that.”

his twinkling eyes paired with that dangerously sweet smile of his took you off guard for a second

you had to shyly looked away to organize your thoughts because pray god that you weren’t interpreting this situation the wrong way

thanking him again with his name this time, you told him you will drop by to pay him back so won’t owe him anything

instead, he smiled and asked you to give him a second so he could tell how you could repay your ‘debt’

while you remained confused, joshua took one of the napkins sitting on the counter and scribbled something down before passing it to you

it had his number written neatly with a:

“i only work the midnight shift, you can repay the debt by going on a date with me :)”

#seventeen #seventeen fanfic #seventeen scenarios #joshua hong #hong jisoo #seventeen joshua #joshua fanfiction #joshua scenarios #seventeen imagines #seventeen fluff #kpop fanfiction #kpop fluff #seventeen fanfiction #svt #admin cinnamon roll #joshua #kpop scenarios

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williamcheart · 6 years ago

Text

- ̗̀ * ( bill skarsgard + cismale + he/him ) have you seen ( william ‘colt’ heart ii ) walking around campus ? they are a ( twenty-four ) year old, studying ( business + literature ). we hear they are in ( omicron tau xi ), and can be ( composed & detached ), maybe it’s because they are an ( aquarius ). they sort of remind us of ( chicken scratch handwriting, trembling hands, a coach’s whistle ), maybe we can find out more ! * ̖́- + literary magazine

u were all wondering whomstve the bill skarsgard fc reserve was . . . . it was I and i have no mcfuckin’ regrets. we love. and stan. william colton heart the second

tw. cancer, death, substance abuse, car accident, mental illness.

gen info!

full name: william colton heart ii

nickname(s): will to his family, colton/just colt to p much everybody else. his full name is reserved for family and when he’s in troubule tbh

b.o.d. - feb. 19th he an aquarius bby

label(s): the fallen, the phoenix, the crestfallen, etc. etc.

height: tall but taller than benjy tall like we’re talking a whopping 6′4″ jfc

hometown: beaufort, south carolina !!

sexuality: b...i...?

bio info!

born n raised in beaufort, south carolina--william is the eldest heart sibling

was a really quiet kid, tbh, like he minded his business and stuck close to the people he knew

always, always wanted to impress his parents, so he always studied hard for school and kind of put all his focus into it ??

it was a pressure for him, really, bc he’d always been told that he’s gonna inherit the family business like how his dad did, etc. etc.

and like...sweetie never wants to disappoint anyone, ever.

he was never considered a nerd tho?? like he’s always been freakishly tall, and his quietness sort of made him intimidating to be around b/c it always felt like he was judging u bc he’d always have to look down at u

has always been super protective over his younger siblings, feels as if it’s his duty to be the put-together brother

he’s never had to fight anybody tho, and like, thank god for that b/c he’s definitely not a fighter, considers himself to be a pacifist for the most part

bc like...he can just stare u down and ur like uuuh gtg bye !!1!111!!!

anyways, grew up riding horses, finds it v v peaceful but he stopped when they moved to california

but track has always been his kinda thing regardless of where he’s at, tried out for track his freshmen yr of high school n was the star of the team tbh

he met a gal going by the name dinah during a track meet the middle of his freshmen yr

she was taking photos for the yearbook and stuttered over her words more often than not, even when she teased william

and like...tbh? william adored her immediately

it really wasn’t soon at all until they started dating, like, they were the high school couple

they complimented each other v v well and were prolly always together lbr

i’m hc’ing that his family also adored dinah like it’s law

dinah is the one who like...really encouraged him to pursue writing as something more serious than just for fun, because will had always enjoyed writing--esp poetry--but he didn’t want it to get in the way of his future w the stables ??

and like...fuck, they were so cute, guys. they were so mf cute.

dinah got diagnosed w/ lung cancer in the beginning of their junior year; she began online school halfway thru b/c she didn’t have the energy physically to go to class, went thru a looot of chemo

william was with her the entire time, y’know, if he wasn’t in school or at track he’d probably be with her the most, trying to cheer her up in the ways he could, helped her study for their SATs bc he knew it was rly important to her

by the summer she was in remission and they thought that was it--still super fucking careful, but they really genuinely thought that that was the end of it y’know ?? that she’d just be better ??

they got into a few months of senior year with her being healthy enough to go to school again, but the further time passed...dinah relapsed, rapidly, and the cancer had spread to other parts of her body

they spent their last valentine’s day in the hospital, and the next day she was gone

it...crushed william, just kind of changed his life, y’know? dinah was all he knew and he really didn’t know how to live w/o her

spent a lot of his time locked away in his room or never even home to begin with, just wandering about hopelessly or sleeping, or trying to sleep that is

poured his heart into his poetry, though--in dinah’s honor, he tried so mf hard to keep doing what he loved even though he was so hurt

it was because of his constant hard work, and dinah’s past encouragements, that william entered and won a poetry contest during his senior year. got a hella scholarship that made everybody proud of him, just b/c he was ~defying odds~

kinda put on this mask so that others wouldn’t see how bad he was doing ?? b/c he’s the level-headed brother, y’kno, the one who always had his shit together and knew what he was doing

dinah and william won cutest couple and even prom king n queen as a sort of tribute to dinah but will didn’t even go to prom tbh he got drunk and threw cans of beer off of a cliff

anyways, he graduated high school n attended ucla bc that was his dad’s school and gdi he’s tryn his best to follow in his footsteps

even got into his dad’s frat b/c he was that determined

he didn’t rly partake much in parties but he did indulge every once in a while, y’know, just to do it, was finally getting his shit back together and doing well for once y’know?? he joined track n took it p seriously

when angela heart died, all of that fell apart again

he took an entire year off of school b/c at that point his mental health had taken a really bad turn, depression was sort of controlling his life and he was spiraling so mf far down that he sometimes couldn’t recognize himself

during that time he published his first and second poetry book under w.c. heart; it’s super morbid, depressing, you can pretty much feel his depression as it manifests in the pages. it begins with poetry from his earlier years, of when he was with dinah and then afterwards, when she dies

the second poetry book is about healing, and then how sometimes you can fall back even when you’re doing good (i.e. around the time lil baby angel died)

when he finally did go back to school he had a much better mindset, seemed to be doing well--was one of the best on the track team--partied a little harder, did drugs more often than usual but nothing too extreme y’know ??

his junior year he got into a p bad car accident n derailed into a body of water after crashing his side of the car into another and losing control of his vehicle

like honestly thank god for the stranger who immediately stopped their car and went totally-hero on the situation, they got william out of the car before he could drown and essentially saved his life, before calling 911 and just. disappearing as soon as the sirens were audible

somehow his left leg got mc’fucked in the incident and it just so happened to ruin his track career

also gave william a fear of swimming/deep water + driving. like. he never wants to be in control of a car again. it really added onto his anxiety and was probably the root of his panic disorder tbh

he took another year off of school to recover from his injuries and to just fucking...put himself in some therapy, because he knows. when it’s time to take care of himself. is really still determined to b the best, he’s just trying to take his time now.

got addicted to painkillers b/c of the injury, sought them out after his prescription ran out; it varies between oxy, vicodin, n percocets and like...they mix really badly w/ his antidepressants tbh ??

that’s v v hush-hush bc he doesn’t want people to worry about him moreso than they already do after like...all these tragic mf events y’know.

he had moved out of his greek house to live on his own but after his second time coming back to ucla he moved back in b/c that way somebody could kick his ass if he fell down the rabbit hole again y’know

his antidepressant, lexapro, causes hallucinations and now he’s been seeing dinah everywhere, hearing her voice, etc. etc. he thinks he’s finally going insane and also keeps it v hush hush b/c he doesn’t want people to think he is

he looks worse for wear but he just. keeps on pretendin’.

personality!

he’s just ... really calm tbh?

he’s always been the (or one of the) least fussy child, hated starting conflicts

if anything he’s always been a mediator ?? the peacemaker, tries to resolve things before they get outta hand

he hates fighting, physical n verbal, refuses to partake in it

even when dinah n him would get into arguments he’d be really quiet during them

that being said he wasn’t like antisocial or anything just bc he was quiet y’know ??

he was the quiet cool dude who was always popular for some fucking reason (its the height im telling u) and offered rly good advice

he’s a big fucking softie lemme tell u . . . he cries at most movies tbh

v intelligent, still carries small dumbass energy b/c he doesn’t make the best choices as u can tell

v v good at his craft, has been working on his third poetry book but has a lil bit of writer’s block atm and it’s ? torturing him tbh ?

he’s got a sense of humor but it’s like . . . kind of morbid tbh like he deals w shit via locking up his emotions and using humor as a coping mechanism

he’s a sentimental piece of shit tho we love him. he has a bottle of dinah’s favorite perfume and sprays his bed w it before he goes to sleep

that being said he really...isn’t over her, still, y’know ??

he’s 100% sure that she was his soulmate and he doesn’t think she could ever be replaced

(silly boy u cant replace people ! u just. meet people who fit u in other ways.)

hates being babied b/c he’s the oldest goddammit, that’s his job

he has a lil bit of a limp but like . . . that’s just bc his leg hurty

did i mention he’s protective bc he 100% is like listen.

he can bully his siblings. u cannot. that’s the rule sorry

even when his siblings r bullying each other he like body-flops on top of them and is p much like fucking Stop

he’s in his last yr of college but he’s doing grad school right after b/c he rly. doesn’t wanna b a partner w his dad. he doesn’t wanna own the stables or breed horses. he’s troy bolton and writing is his singing, horsebreeding is his basketball.

okay he really wants to know who tf pulled him outta the water b/c he never got to say thank u and he’s just like ?? LET ME SAY THANK U GODDAMMIT

he’s lowkey in the party scene but he’s also a bit of a wallflower when it comes to them, he prefers to drink his alcohol n watch ppl b idiots or sit on a roof high off his ass with a pal

he’ll fuck u but he wont date u but like so will most of the guys so he’s not unique he’s just a hashtag tortured artist

like it’s so hard for him to connect w others in a potentially romantic way ?? bc he just doesn’t feel anything and u cant really blame him for it tbh

has panic attacks n insomnia but u aint hear it from me

ironically........has taken up smoking cigarettes, as well.......even tho his gf died from lung cancer.......will why?

oh right bc i commanded thee

wanted connections !!

WHO PULLED HIM OUTTA THAT MF CAR CRASH ?? - i wanna know mf !!

his siblings uwu - GIVE US THE LAST HEART. PLEASE.

roommate - !! they can b chill or hate each other tbh who knows

frat bros - please.

uuuh general friends i guess ??

will they wont they - they’re rly close but will is really dumb and straight refuses to acknowledge the fact that they’d b like . . . perfect together

general unrequited things - william is emotionally unavailable, lmao, let’s see how that works w others

current hookups - he’s a bit of a slut, let’s b real. we ain’t shaming him b/c we don’t do that in 2k19 but we also speaking truths

good influences - please...help him get better

confidantes - somebody he just can fuckin complain to w/o feeling shitty or guilty for it

bad influences - make him. worse. he’s doing bad but he’s not at his worst yet.

anything. else. u want. i will do. i can do. i am god. i have ultimate power. william is my pAWN.

#uclas:intro #lmao here he is #please love him he's fragile #he's a good boy he's just a lil damaged #very damaged #but ykno...he's fine #smoking tw #uwuwuwuwu

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lexiauteur · 7 years ago

Text

Don’t Take Him Away

A Jumin/Reader Oneshot

Request: anonymous

Hello pretty ❤️ I really really like your writing because you are so good ❤️ can I request a fic about mcxjumin where he have a heart attack ( i tried to find a rules post but I couldn't so I don't know if you are okay with it but if you are uncomfortable with writing it you can just drop it ) sorry for my bad English

Warnings: This story contains mentions of death, please proceed with that in mind.

Wordcount: 1,411

A/N: I did it! I finished it! Took me longer than expected, but tbh honest it was quite difficult for me to write such a dramatic scene. I’m also not super happy how the ending turned out but I hope you enjoy it anyways and as always, if you have constructive criticism to share please do so. Oh, and if you wanna be tagged in future posts, please let me know as well. <3

“Honey, are you okay?” I asked Jumin, lightly touching his shoulder.

He was sitting at his desk as usual, his back facing the huge window front of his office. Frantically typing on his computer, he was clearly stressed and had been the past week. I just came in to bring a stack of documents for him to sign. His brows knit in confusion, as he looked up from the screen and eyed the documents I was neatly putting on the glass table.

I have been working at the C&R building for about 6 months now, partially because I wanted to reduce Jaehee’s amount of work, but also to see my husband more often. Due to his business, we had been rarely seeing each other (besides sometimes having dinner together) and I missed spending some quality time with Jumin.

“I’m fine y/n, it’s just a little warm in here” he said, his voice raspy and dry. Loosening the collar of his button-down, his eyes never left the computer screen. Not believing him, I glanced at his profile. He was looking quite ashy and beads of sweat were already forming on his forehead.

“Shall I open the window then?” I suggested. His state was starting to concern me, I’ve never seen him like this before.

He nodded and I turned around to open one of the big windows. Then I walked up behind him, massaging his shoulders and temples. He closed his eyes for a second, I could feel him relaxing under my touch and he sighed in contentment.

“I know you have a lot of work to do, Jumin, but you have been so stressed lately and it’s really starting to concern me. Can’t you take a day off, or maybe two?” I carefully asked him, but I also already knew my answer.

“I’m sorry if I’ve worried you y/n, but you know I can’t do that. It is very important that I get everything done before my business trip” He mumbled and I could hear the exhaustion in his voice.

“But Jaehee and I can do the work instead. You should get some rest. Please consider taking a break” I pled with him. I knew Jumin could be extremely stubborn, but as of late he was neglecting his own body and I couldn’t bear seeing him like this anymore.

“Fine, I’ll take a day off. I’ll make you a list of the things that need to be done over the course of next week and -”

He stopped mid-sentence, suddenly hunching with pain as a wave of coughs overcame him. His body heavily jerked with every cough and he tensed up immediately.

“Oh god Jumin, are you okay?” I jump to his side, eyes wide with shock, grabbing his arm to support him. But he wasn’t answering, just coughing and desperately gasping for air. He stood up from his chair, leaning onto the desk. His coughs became even more rapid and started choking.

The look in his eyes was frightening, I’ve never seen so much terror in someone’s eyes. I quickly removed his tie and almost ripped his shirt open. Jumin was clutching his chest with his right hand and supporting himself on my arm with the left.

I was starting to panic, because he didn’t stop coughing and it was getting worse. Frantically searching the room for something to help him, I tried calling Jaehee but she didn’t answer her phone. Cursing under my breath, I ran to the bathroom, filling a cup with ice-cold water and sprinting back to his office, almost tripping and falling over in my heels.

I gave him the water and he chugged it down, his face contorting with pain. But he could breathe again, taking gulps of air as if his life was about to end. He slid down his desk, his body was so weak that he couldn’t support his own weight any longer.

After the coughing had calmed down, Jumin was shaking. His hands were feeling cold and clammy, but his forehead was burning up. He was still in pain and it kept getting worse. I clutched his hand, tears started streaming down my face.

“Y/n, I... I think I’m having a heart attack” His words were barely a whisper, as another wave of pain flooded his body. He slid down his desk, his body was so weak that he couldn’t support his own weight any longer.

It felt like someone punched me in the stomach. My mind went blank and it seemed like the earth stopped spinning for a second.

My body moved on its own, grabbing the phone and calling 911. To this day, I still have no idea how I managed to tell the woman on the other end that my husband was dying.

“The paramedics are on their way Jumin...” I smiled through my tears, grabbing his ice-cold hands. His eyes were closed and his body had stopped shaking.

“Jumin, did you hear me? The paramedics are on their way... Jumin? Jumin!”

I couldn’t even hear my own screaming, tears streaming over my face and blurring my vision. I violently shook his body, over and over again, until the door flung open and someone pushed me to the side. Jaehee and a team of paramedics rushed in, taking Jumin’s lifeless body out of my hands.

I never thought I would ever see someone performing CPR on my husband. And although I was conscious the whole time, at this point I don’t remember what happened anymore.

The next thing I know, I was in the hospital, sitting in the waiting room. Alone. After pleading with her, Jaehee had finally agreed to stay at Jumin’s office to take care of the paperwork. But now I was almost regretting that decision because I was longing for comfort. My husband was in a critical condition and my anxiety was slowly starting to take over my thoughts.

The hours were passing; I stood up, restlessly pacing around the room, then sitting down in my chair again, burying my face in my hands.

Then finally the door to the waiting room opened. “Mrs. Han? You can see your husband now” a nurse called. I basically jumped up from my seat and followed her down the hall to the intensive care unit.

“Please have a seat, the doctor will be here any minute” she said and opened the door to Jumin’s room. I hesitantly walked in, suddenly scared to see my husband, and sat next to his bed. The nurse left and I was alone with him.

I had never seen my husband like this. His skin looked gray and dull, his hair had lost its shine and there were dark circles under his eyes. The room was quiet, except for the breathing noises of his oxygen mask and the steady beeping of his heart monitor. He looked so weak, almost fragile, and I was scared to touch him, scared that I would never feel the warmth of his skin ever again.

After another 10 minutes, the door opened and the doctor walked in.

“Hello Mrs. Han, I’m Dr. Lee” he introduced himself and shook my hand. He told me that the surgery went well and that Jumin should fully recover from the injury. A heart attack at such a young age was very unusual, the doctor explained, considering the fact that Jumin doesn’t smoke and excercises a lot.

They had given him strong pain medication and told me he might be delirious and disoriented when we would wake up.

Tears were filling my eyes again, I was so relieved to hear that Jumin was going to fine. My hands were shaking as I thanked the doctor over and over again.

For the next month I visited the hospital every single day. Jumin looked better each day, he was even starting to smile again and became stronger. I brought him gifts and took care of him so much, to the point where I thought I was overdoing it.

But Jumin reassured me that he wouldn’t want anyone else at his side.

“It’s all thanks to your amazing care and your love that I will continue waking up next to you every morning and seeing your beautiful face” he said to me, taking my hand in his. I could see the adoration in his eyes and feel the warmth of his skin again, and I knew then that this man would never ever leave my side.

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