#but so be it. I can't possibly humiliate myself more than this | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

candy69gurl · 7 months ago

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INSUBORDINATION

PAIRING Toji Fushiguro x f!reader

SYNOPSIS The reader, a young woman of wealth, is married to Toji and consistently treats him as her servant, much to his dismay. Fed up with her behavior, Toji resolves to teach her a lesson.

WARNING non/con, brat taming, spitting, face fucking, hair pulling, spanking, face slapping, fingering, nipple play, missonary, bondage (hands tied only), cock riding, squirting, doggy style, multiple orgasms, degradation, use of vulgar words (dog, bitch, slut, whore, cum slut), humiliation, raw sex (cumming inside mouth, creampie, face cumming), breeding kink, clit slapping & rubbing, man handling

Marrying this seemingly charming and powerful Toji Fushiguro, you believed it imparted a greater benefit upon him than it did upon yourself. His overwhelming infatuation for you was not reciprocated, and instead, you treated him more as a pet than a partner. As a young, rich woman with an air of superiority, you demanded his obedience and submission, constantly reminding him of his place. You were unaware of the brewing storm inside him, waiting to unleash its fury upon you. Little did you know, the love and adoration he had for you were a ticking time bomb about to go off. The way he was treated drove him insane, pushing him to the brink of insanity, and he couldn't take it anymore.

"Hmm, so.. Toji I would like to talk to you, my dear", your eyes never leaving your nails.

Toji glares at you, his eyes smouldering with rage and lust stored inside him. Despite his inner turmoil, he forces a smile and responds, "My lady, I am here." His voice drips with false sincerity, reflecting the pain within him. It's clear that every moment spent serving you gnaws at his soul, fueling his desire to teach you a lesson you will never forget. Yet, he can't let you sense his true intentions - not yet.

He waits patiently, his muscles tensing beneath his clothes, as he anticipates your command. His heart pounds wildly against his chest, and his mind racing with thoughts of revenge and domination. He knows that he's about to snap anytime.

"I need you to stop wasting my money on gambling", your gaze finally shifts from your nails to Toji, who's standing before you with his head bowed.

A chill runs down Toji's spine as he hears your words. Your demand has cut him deeper than any blade could, igniting a firestorm of emotions within him.

How can he possibly stop himself from doing that? It's his sole means of earning money for himself. And it's not like he constantly relies on your finances for that. But the way you phrased your money, it really struck a nerve and left him feeling utterly humiliated. He understood that you were implying he should beg you for money, but that's something he would never do.

He tries to maintain his composure, swallowing the bitter taste that filled his mouth. With a stiff nod, he replies, "As you wish, my lady. I shall cease all gambling activities and dedicate myself entirely to your needs. But I would like you to stop ordering me around"

"Excuse me? who do you think you are?", one of your eyebrows raised, utterly confused by his sudden back-talk.

Toji's eyes flash with defiance, and his voice take on a dangerous edge, "I am your husband, a man scorned and abandoned. I have given you everything I have, my love, my heart, my trust. Yet, I receive nothing in return. I am sick of being treated like a mere toy. My passion for you burns like a thousand suns, and it is time you recognized my worth!" His face contorts with rage and hurt, his entire body trembling with suppressed power. "Do not mistake my patience for weakness, for I am far from it. One day, you will learn the consequences of disregarding those who truly care for you."

Your countenance remain devoid of emotion as he uttered those words. Instead, you advance towards him, drawing nearer... and nearer... until you stand face-to-face. Despite his height advantage, you are aware of the superiority you hold.

In an instant, your hand delivers a sharp slap to his face, causing his head to jerk to the right. "How dare you talk to me like that?"

Your slap lands across Toji's cheek with a loud smack, jolting him back to reality. His eyes widen, shock etching lines onto his face. For a brief moment, he stand frozen, the sting of your hand burning a trail across his pale skin. Then, without warning, his expression twists into one of pure fury. In a single, fluid motion, he grabs your wrist and pins you on the ground.

"GET OFF ME YOU SICKO", you scream.

Toji snarls, his eyes blazing with a feral intensity. "No, little miss high-and-mighty, I decide when this ends. You've played your games, and now it's time to pay the price," he growls, his grip on your wrist tightening. He leans closer, his hot breath washing over your face as he whispers, "You thought I was weak and submissive, but you sorely underestimated me. I am a man consumed by desire and rage, and I will make you pay for your cruelty."

His other hand moves to fondle with your clothed breasts, "Coming to think of it.. I never touched.. Maybe tonight is the time .. I finally discover your secrets."

"Don't even think of it.. Move your filthy hands off me!!" your legs pushing his chest away from your body.

Toji's eyes narrow, his lips curling into a predatory smile. "Oh, I think I've already discovered your secrets, my dear. You're just as desperate for my touch as I am for yours. You can scream all you want, but no one will come to save you. You're mine, and I will have my way with you."

His grip on your wrist intensifies and he begins to move his hand lower, towards your thigh. "You've pushed me too far, and now it's time for you to learn a lesson you'll never forget. I'll make you beg for my touch, and when I'm done, you'll be mine completely."

"I should have kept a body guard..", your eyes get teary as you start feeling vulnerable. The thing that you hated the most.

Toji's eyes flicker with a hint of victory at your admission. "Yes, perhaps you should have," he murmurs, his voice thick with satisfaction. "But it's too late now. There's no one coming to save you."

His fingers trail along the edge of your clothing, teasingly close to bare skin. "I plan to make it as painful and pleasurable as possible. You'll come to cherish these moments, begging for more, even as you curse my name."

His eyes gleam with malicious intent as he leaned in, his breath hot against your ear. "Every benefit you receive carries a price; for the service I've rendered you over the years, my dear wife, I require my due compensation. I'm not interested in payments via cheque, cash, or phone apps. I seek recompense through your body."

"I will never.. ever.. submit to you .. Toji Fushiguro..", you land kick on his side, attempting to run away from his grasp, yet he remains unaffected. He does grunt as your kick connected with his side, but he doesn't release you. Instead, he smirks, his gaze heated. "You.. Keep struggling, but you're only making this worse for yourself. Give in to me, let me show you the pleasure you've denied yourself for so long."

Slowly, he slides his hand underneath your clothing, his fingertips brushing against your skin unclasping your bra, taking it off you easily. You squirm beneath him, but his grip remains firm, unwavering.

"D-dont do it ..", you try squirming again.

Toji's lips twitch into a cruel grin. "Ah, but I must. After all, I promised to teach you a lesson, and I always keep my promises." His fingers continues their relentless exploration, caressing your nipple gently before pinching it firmly.

"Feel it, wife. Feel the pleasure I can give you, even as I punish you. Let your body betray your reluctance, let it crave what you claim to despise." He leans in closer, his breath ghosting over your ear as he whispers, "And remember, this is all ya fault. You made me this way."

You buck beneath him, trying to escape his grasp, but his hold on you unyielding. He pushes your top up, yanking it off you, exposing your breasts.

"S-stop ..", your hands escapes his grip swiftly, trying to hide your bare chest from his monstrous gaze.

Toji's eyes roams over your exposed body hungrily, drinking in the sight of your exposedness for the first time. "Such beauty, wasted on someone like you..."

He reaches out, his finger trailing down your sternum, then moving to your neck, causing goosebumps to rise. Your hands pushing his face, gripping his hair, trying to yank him off you.. But everything fails. And you know if you try hitting him, it'll enrage him further. Your hits are nothing in comparison to the hits requried to knock this giant man down.

Toji chuckles darkly, his grip on you unbreakable. "You cannot escape me, my dear. Not tonight." His fingers dance lightly along your collarbone, tracing patterns that sent chills down your spine. "You wanted control, you craved dominance, and now you shall experience both in equal measure."

As his fingers reaches your breast, he gently slapped your hands and, cupped your breasts, squeezing slightly before letting go. His eyes sparkling with mischief as he watches you writhe under his touch. "Soon, you'll beg for more."

Refusing to yield, you remain steadfast in your refusal to submit to him. You attempt to land kicks once again, this time more haphazardly and with greater force.

Toji catches one of your legs easily, his eyes gleaming with a mix of anger and lust. "Keep struggling, wife. Make it harder on yourself." He responds, his voice thick with emotion. His gaze lingers on your body, taking note of every twitch and shiver.

With a swift movement, he rolls you onto your stomach, restraining your arms behind your back, squeezing your face on the ground. His veins bulged on his hands as he gripped your hair tightly, pressing your cheeks against the cold floor with force.

Toji smirked, enjoying the fight in you. He pressed his body against yours, his erection evident through his clothes. "What happened to the lioness?" he mocked. "Got defeated by a mere dog?"

He reaches for your hefty priced skirt, ripping it down, revealing your bare ass. His hand hovers over it for a moment before bringing it down, delivering a sharp slap. You cry out in surprise and pain, arching your back.

"Fuck you that dress's worth is more than yours", Toji's eyes fall on your reddened teary-face. He gazes for a while before laughing cruelly, the sound echoing in the quiet room.

"Is that all you can muster, a reprimand for my actions? I thought you'd beg for mercy by now." His hand falls again, this time harder, the sting of the slap searing through your body.

"You are tough I must say" He speaks, his voice dark and heavy with emotion. His eyes flash with mischief as he prepared for his next move.

"L-let me go now", your tone somehow shifts to a plea.

He looks down at your red, angry cheeks and puffy lips, his gaze shifting to your ass, the imprints of his five fingers are distinctly visible on your skin. "Shall I?"

"YOU WILL LET ME GO BASTARD i WILL KILL YOU," you yell at him, hating the way he was treating you, as if he owns you.

Toji pulls you up by your hair, leaning closer to your face, "Looks like you haven't learned your lesson yet. Need to shut that big mouth,"

You forcefully expel saliva from your mouth, deliberately directing it towards his face, "Never."

Toji's face flashes with a grin as he wipes off your spit from his face and licks his finger, his grip on your hair tightening. "Nasty bitch!" he snarls. His free hand frees his erection and you gasp on seeing how big he is. Big enough to nearly kill you.

"W-what the fuck do you think you are doing", you swallowed in anticipation.

Without responding, he pulls your mouth towards his erection, rubbing the tip on your swollen lips.

Your hands reach up to squeeze his shaft, intending to hurt him. Toji winces, his eyes flashing with pain and anger. "You really don't want to die, do you?" His voice shaking with fury as he grasps your wrists, locking them on either side of his legs, his precum leaking shaft rubbing against your cheek. "This is your punishment, and you're going to take it like a good girl."

Despite your resistance, he thrusts his erection into your mouth, forcing you to take him off. You could barely take in his entire length as drool cascades down your chin and your neck swells with every push. You struggle but he remains firm, so you use your teeth, nibbling on his dick.

Toji hisses in pain and anger, releasing you. "You fucking cunt! I should've known better." He slaps you, causing you to cry out in agony. "That's for biting me!" He grabs your hair again, pulling your head toward his dick and begins to thrust roughly.

"Hnghh-", tears stream down your cheeks, smudging your flawless makeup.

Toji's eyes squint seeing you cry, his lips curling up trying to hide his laugher. "Crying? That's cute. You're crying while servicing me!" His grasp on your head tightens as he keeps fucking your throat relentlessly. "Didn't think you could handle it huh? Too bad, because this is just beginning!"

Your eyes twitching in anger, you keep making noises of struggles.

Toji's thrusts increasing in speed. "Shut up, you ungrateful whore! This is what you deserve!" He slamms into you harder, ignoring your protests.

Why is he acting like that all of a sudden? You never thought the man you married is going to treat you like this. But yes karma, you have hurt him, you made him like this. HE IS RIGHT, you deserve this.

His grip tightened on your hair, his thrusts growing more violent until you screamed, tears streaming down your face. Finally, he cums, flooding your mouth with his seed. "Swallow it. I want to see your Adam's apple moving."

You involuntary swallow his seed. Toji stares at you, his breathing ragged, his eyes fixated on the sight of you swallowing his semen. "Good dog," he sneers, wiping his shaft clean.

You wipe your mouth weakly, "I will never forgive you. You are gonna face the consequences."

Toji chuckles coldly, releasing you. "Oh, the night just started.." He picks you up walking towards your bedroom.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT.. WE ARE DONE.. I AM GOING TO FUCKING DIVORCE YOU", you throw punches on his spine, your nails scratcing his clothed back.

Ignoring your threats, Toji places you on bed, tying your hands with his XXL tshirt to the headboard. His eyes glinting with excitement. "We're far from done, darling. Now, spread your legs, or shall I do it for you?"

"You are not allowed to touch me.. TOJI FUSHIGURO!"

Toji grins wickedly," Oh yeah?", with a swift movement he pulls your panties off you. You legs hiding your core from his gaze. His eyes locked on your resistant form. " He reaches down, spreading your legs apart with force. Your protest is soon silenced by a hard slap accross your clit.

"Now Now.. Look at that," he gathers your wetness with his finger and licks it, "Taste of a bitch in heat."

You bite your lower lip from embarassment. Toji's eyes darkens with lust, his fingers running through your damp entrance, teasing your hole. "You're so wet, yet you are protesting? Ah, I love it." He smirks before inserting his finger inside you, feeling you tense. His eyes searching for your reaction.

"You are lying.. It's not possible-", you still keep on protesting.

Toji pulls his finger, "Hmm?" He raises his eyebrow at you, "Am I? Prove me wrong!" He inserts another finger, stretching you wide. You gasp, arching your back. "Mmm, see for yourself", he then pulls his fingers out. He holds his fingers near your face, covered in your essence, "See?", forcing them into your mouth making you taste yourself.

Your eyes widening, cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

Toji's eyes gleam triumphantly, his fingers finding their way back inside you. "Pretend all you want, but your body knows the truth." His thumb rubbed your clit, expecting a moan from you. "You want to feel my cock inside you, and let us both know the truth."

"D-do what you want.. but I will not moan."

Toji's grin never wavered as he pulled out his finger. "Stubborn till the end, aren't we?"

He adjusts his position above you, his erection poised to enter you. "Very well, but you won't be able to help yourself soon enough." Before you can react, he thrusts into you roughly, invading your core. He groans at the tightness, his pace increasing.

Your hands tugging on the restraint, eyes watering again from the invasion. He leans in, whispering in your ear, "Let me hear it, your pleasure."

"F-fuck fuck.. pull it out already.. Toji", you nearly beg him.

Toji does not pull out instead he leans back, his dick sliding inside you further hitting your womb as tears spill out of your eyes from the stretching.

"Ohh.. What a sight to behold! The mistress is crying.. Is that how you request your controller?", he slows down a little.

"Please.. Toji... pull it out already", you feel your insides getting ripped everytime he pushes himself in you.

Toji laughs darkly, "Call me master Toji"

"Bastard", you reply.

He starts thrusting, roughly and harshly. "You want to die?"

"Pls master toji .. It's tearing me," your voice shaking with pain and confused pleasure.

His thrusts slows down again, his eyes scanning your tear-streaked face. "That's right. Who owns you?"

"Y-you..", you reply, your self respect crumbled against Toji's feet.

He smiles cruelly, "Mmm... What's that? I wanted to pull out, but your walls are not allowing me to." with that he keeps slamming into you. This time gentlier than before. Your face twisting in anger and tears.

"No, no..." he murmurs, leaning down to kiss your forehead softly. "It's alright. Embrace your submissive nature. You'll thank me later." His thrusting intensifies, his pace accelerating. You whimper, unable to control your pleasure. "It feels good hah?"

"N-no it does not," you lie. Toji's eyes glint at your lie. 'We will see about that" as he speeds up his thrusts, pulling your nipple causing you to cry even louder.

Suddenly moan escapes from your mouth, biting your lips you hide your shift your head right avoiding eye contact with him.

"There it is!" he whispers, his thrusts growing more erratic. "Didn't you just say, you won't moannn?" his mocking evident. "That's it, let go! Enjoy it!" He rams into you, owning you fully.

Your eyes locking on his again. "You look so beautiful, when you are this vulnerable and submissive." His words, punctuated by his thrusts, your moans filling the air. "So obedient..."

Your walls tighten, your climax reaching soon. Toji's thrusts slow down as he realizes your nearness. "Not yet..." He pulls his dick out, causing you to cry out.

"I decide when you cum. Remember that." He reaches down, playing with your clit. "Beg for it."

You look at him, your mind still not wanting to give in.

"Beg for it, or I will keep doing this the whole night" He repeats, his voice firm.

He strokes his cock, your eyes widened, realizing the threat. "Please Toji, let me cum.." Your voice trembled, your body tensing.

"Please what?", he smirks biting his lips.

"P-Please master..", you pout after saying the words.

Toji smirks, placing the tip back to your entrance. "Complete the sentence," he rubs your wet, puffy clit with his tip.

"P-Please master toji let me cum", your respect for yourself almost vanished as your eyes begged for him.

"Louder" He pushes his tip inside you, painfully slow.

"PLEASE MASTER TOJI LET ME CUM.. PLEASE .. I BEG OF YOU"

Toji lets out a satisfied growl, thrusting deep. "That's more like it, my good slave." He pounds you mercilessly, your pleas for release filling the air. "Cum. For me."

Your body tenses, toes curl as you orgasm hard, walls spasming rapidly against his cock. Toji watches your orgasm unfurl, his dick pulsating inside you. "Mmm, nice." He thrusts faster, his climax approaching. "Fuck, yes. So tight.. I never imagined you felt this good." He grunts, his breath hitched, his release imminent. "Gonna fill you up. Bet you won't remain selfish anymore once you have your own baby."

Only moans come out of you as he thrusts into your oversensitive pussy. Toji finishes his thrusts, spilling himself inside you, pulling out just to see his seed drooling out of your clamping walls. "Shit.. Look at that, so dirty", he pushes his dick inside you again, watching your body shuddering.

You mutter a low appologise as your breathing starts becoming stable once again. "Oh so now ya guilty?" Toji laughs, his dick twitching inside you still, he's getting hard once again. He pulls his dick out and drags you onto his lap.

He caresses your cheek, "Do you think I can ever forgive you baby? with all these years of disrespect that you flung at me?" his other hand pats your ass. "I dont want to hear your apologies. I will divorce you just like that."

You feel as though everything is falling apart around you. It's the last thing you expected to hear from him. You know you love him, but you chose to ignore your feelings up until this point. "Pls master.. d-dont divorce me .. I love you", you lean towards him, kissing his cheek.

Toji's eyes flickered for a moment, as you kiss his cheek. "Wow.. Just an orgasm out of you, put you in your place? Perhaps.. There's only one way to change my mind", he licks his tongue wanting to push your buttons. You look at him expectantly.

Toji's eyes sparked with devious delight "Show me how much you love me, my slave".

Sighing, you take his erect cock and insert it inside of you. You begin to flex and extend your hips along his girth.

Toji watches as you ride him, his eyes never leaving you, his eyes twinkling. "Mmm, nothing sexier than a woman in need," He growls, grabbing your hips and pushing you into his hips. "Ride it harder!" He groans, moving along with your rhythm. You nod and increase your pace, bouncing harder, his veins popping on his forehead.

"Impressive, but more!" His hands move to your neck, pulling you closer. "Yes.. Open your mouth whore" He grips your throat gently, tightening his hold.

You open your mouth, and Toji spits in it, "Swallow it". Without any delay you swallow it.

Toji laughs, "How the tables turn, huh?"

You lean to kiss him, but he grabs your neck not allowing you to get closer to him. "I don't want to kiss your nasty mouth bitch"

"P-please master toji.. kiss me", you beg him, hands reaching to caress his hand on your neck.

"Hmm?" he whispers, "Why would I do that?" He tightens his grip, making it harder for you to breathe. You gasp, your eyes locking with his.

"I am sorry," you cry and pout, hips slamming against his pubis while riding him.

"Apologizing?" He loosens his grip, allowing you to breathe easier. "Now that's better." He watches you, how you are engulfing his cock with each movement.

"Still want my kiss?" He taunts, as he release his grip on your neck.

"Yes.. please.. Kiss me"

Toji captures your lips, his tongue invading your mouth. You moan, wrapping your arms around his neck. He groans, the taste of your submission sweet. "Mmm, such a good slave." He pulls away, "Appology accepted". His mouth leans in to latch onto one of your breasts, tongue circling your nipples and his cheeks hollowing.

Unable to control yourself you squirt all over him. He grunts at your sudden tightness. "What the fuck- so tight ah.." He removes his dick from you, putting you on your knees and hands. "Pissing like a dog? Want me to piss on you too?"

"S-sorry master, I was unable to control myself", your eyes rolled from the experience, collapsing on the bed.

Toji spanks your ass, bringing you to your knees. He lines up his dick to your entrance, holding you steady. "Ya looking like a used slut." His dick slides in your entrance, stretching you again. You whine and whimper, thighs shaking from the ecounters before.

"So sensitive..", Toji scoffs.

"Please .. I am near .. fuck me harder", your voice pleading, eyes rolled, drools driping down your chin.

Toji's thrusts speed up, taking you from behind. "Such an Insatiable cum slut " He groans, his voice hoarse. "Tell me how much you want my cum inside you."

"Fill me up pls.... I am master Toji's cumdump"

Toji roars, slamming into you. "Mmm, yes. My cum dump bitch." He releases inside you, feeling you cum and contract around his dick. He pulls out, watching his seed dripping out of you. His eyes lingered over your pussy, "Maybe you deserve a reward after all."

Your whole body convulses. Toji pulls himself out, "Do you want the reward?"

"Please.. reward me master .. I am your good slave," you falter.

Toji smiles, "Very well, my pet. You're a good slave then" He licks your thighs "Mmm, I love you. But if you dare to disappoint me again..." His teeth nibbling on your clit, making you moan loudly. "You know where you stand." He coos and blows on your wetness, licking you clean. Your body trembles, his tongue exploring your folds.

Toji moans, licking your and his cum.. He suckles your clit, his tongue dancing around. A huge cum drop falls on his tongue which he thrusts inside you again.

"Such a good slave, you'll give me a healthy pup" He hums, kissing your inner thighs. Your breath hitches, your orgasm nearing.

Unable to make out anything, you keep taking the pleasure he gives you.

Toji chuckles, his pace unrelenting. "Make me feel needed, slut" He tongue flicks your clit, you shaking. "Cum for me girl" He pinches your clit, your juice flowing freely. "Ahh, so fucking delicious..."

"Gonna cum .. Love you Toji .. a-ah", you blabber. "Yes, my whore. Go ahead" He growls, licking your juice dripping on his lips. Your thighs wrap around him, cumming again. He licks your cum from his tongue, your legs trembling.

"Good girl". He kisses your neck then pulling you closer to his dick.

"Clean your mess from it" He whispers.

Toji breathes heavily, your mouth enveloping his half-hardened dick. It gets hard again, "Mmm, yes, clean it nicely" He cups your head, his shaft coats in your saliva. "Like that, slut" His hand affectionately messes your hair, your moaning muffled. "So good... God.. I should have done this a lot earlier." He watched you swallow his dickhead, your saliva running down your chin. He laughs, his breaths hitched.

You suck on his balls while he strokes his length, "You know how to make a man happy" he whispers. He pulls you by your hair rubbing his dick on your cheeks.

He leans back, hips jerking. "Mmm, shoot!", his cum splattering across your face, your tongue sticking out, trying to catch some cum drops. He smiles, wiping your face.

"Mmm, so obedient, my little cum dump" He whispers, kissing your lips. "You did great today and if you dare to mistreat me again.."

"I will put you in your place.. Like how I did today."

DIVIDERS FROM @/cafekitsune

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wintrwinchestr · 6 months ago

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an overture of indulgence (joel miller x f!reader oneshot) 18+

summary: it's been a long time since you've seen joel, and some things have changed, but a lot has stayed the same. namely, how quickly he can still get you on his knees for him, ready to show him exactly just how much you like what has changed about him.

warnings: 18+, smut, post-outbreak, jackson joel, d/s relationship dynamics, pet names (baby, babygirl, sweetheart, sweet girl, etc), body worship, belly kink, talk of weight gain, belly riding, m/f masturbation, lil bit of humiliation kink, lil bit of edging, reader is an adult but age otherwise unspecified, reader is shorter than joel and has hair long enough to grab, let me know if i missed anything :)

word count: 4.3k

a/n: just fuckin outing myself left and right these days huh. idk what came over me with this one. started this late last night and here it is now. belly enjoyers rise!!!!!!! nice comments/reblogs appreciated if you enjoyed <3 you can't kink shame me bc i like getting bullied so now what. also i avoided daddy kink for once in my life please clap. i know i’m spoiling y’all this weekend don’t get used to it.

divider by @saradika

“...Joel?!” you shout, your leisurely walking pace quickly turning into a hurried jog as you leave Tommy behind, making a beeline toward the man you would swear on your life is Joel Miller. A small handful of years ago now, he was kind of your boyfriend, kind of not, kind of something else more complicated and unlabeled, because who can afford to put a label on anything in times like these?

Joel’s head turns in your direction at the sound of his name, and as soon as you spot that crooked scar across the bridge of his nose, you’re certain it’s him.

“Holy shit, I can’t believe it,” you half-cry, throwing your weight into him as you wrap him in a tight embrace. He’s much taller than you, but you still managed to knock him off his balance a little. He envelops your whole body in one of his signature, all-encompassing hugs, and it’s like no time has passed at all.

The two of you had ended whatever it was you had on good terms, no hard feelings or animosity shared between you. It was just hard to maintain any kind of relationship in a world like this, and trying to nurture romance in the Boston QZ was much like trying to grow a rose garden in toxic, radioactive soil. You can put as much care and effort and something like love into it as you have in you, but the circumstances will just never allow it to reach its full potential. The end of your “relationship” was mutual, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. Especially when he had disappeared one day without so much as saying goodbye.

When you had stumbled upon Tommy and a group of patrollers in the snowy forest outside Jackson just earlier today, you were alone, tired, and losing hope that this rumored safe haven even existed at all. You had heard crackles through the radio in the QZ about the community, and even though it sounded too good to be true, what else did you have to lose anymore? After months of travel and survival and pain and hunger, you’d never been so happy to meet a bunch of strangers in the woods in your whole life. You didn’t hesitate to get on the back of Tommy’s horse, and let him lead you to the sanctuary they spoke of.

As he was giving you a tour, proudly showing off their electricity, running water, fresh food, and clean houses, you had started to look forward to what the future may bring, for the first time in a long time. You could never have imagined you’d ever run into Joel again, that this is where he had ended up, of all places. And now here the both of you are, bodies pressed as tightly together as possible, breathing in each other’s familiar scents and never wanting to let go again.

Joel is the first to break the embrace, grasping your head in his large hands and frantically searching your face for any sign that he could be dreaming, that fate hasn’t really brought you back together again after all.

“Jesus Christ, it’s really you,” he breathes, and you swear his voice breaks just a little bit as he presses his lips to your forehead, closing his eyes as he does.

When he blinks them open again, he meets Tommy’s gaze, who’s standing quietly a few yards back from where you’re having your sentimental reunion. Tommy gives an understanding nod, and gestures that he’ll be waiting inside the community’s dining hall, gathering that whatever this is happening between his brother and some girl he only just met, he shouldn’t interrupt. Joel is grateful for many things today, one of them being the rekindled bond he has with Tommy, the other being how you somehow miraculously found your way back to him.

Small groups of other Jackson residents follow Tommy into the dining hall shortly afterward, and as the sun begins to set behind the mountains, Joel realizes it must be about time for dinner to be served.

He detaches his lips from your forehead, brushing some of your hair away from your face as he takes you in again. “You poor thing, must be starvin’ I bet,” he wonders aloud, giving you a sympathetic look.

“Kinda always am, just as a rule, but yeah,” you reply, trying to make light of your situation. Though, Joel doesn’t seem to find the humor in it the way you do.

“Long as you stay here, ain’t ever gotta worry about that again, that’s for damn sure.” He runs his tongue across his lips as he finishes his sentence, already knowing that whatever meal they’re serving tonight, it’ll be some of the most delicious food he’s had in a long time. He suspects you’ll feel much the same. “C’mon, let’s get you inside. Get you warm and fed for once in your life.”

–

Your heart, your stomach, your soul, all feel full as you relax into the comfortable couch in the living room of Joel’s cozy home. He wouldn’t even entertain the idea of you staying in an empty house all by yourself tonight, insisting that if you’d like some company while you settle in, you were more than welcome to his. He had let you spend as long as you wanted to in his shower, and he didn’t mind if there was hardly any warm water left by the time you were done. He sure as hell wasn’t paying the bill, and you deserved to feel truly clean. He can remember clear as day how he felt after his first Jackson shower, like he had stripped off a layer of grime he hadn’t been able to scrub all the way clean in twenty years. He had gone to Maria to get you some clothes and underwear while you were bathing, and set them silently on the sink counter for you to put on whenever you were done.

And now here you sit, feeling full and clean and satisfied and comfortable and safe, watching Joel stoke the logs in his fireplace as it casts the whole room in a honey orange glow. You take a moment to admire him while he isn’t looking, and even in the dim and flickering lighting, you can see he’s just as handsome as he was the last time you saw him. He looks older, with more gray in his longer hair and meat on his bones, the latter trait likely due to years worth of the hearty cooking you both indulged in tonight. He looks… good like this.

“It really is nice to see you again, you know. You look…” you start, not being able to help the way your eyes wander to his soft lower belly, the way it pushes taut against his tucked-in flannel shirt and just barely spills over the edge of his jeans.

He turns his head away from the fire to face you. You’re not very subtle in your staring, and he knows what you’re referring to right away. He huffs a light chuckle, trying to brush off the way he thinks you’re poking fun at him.

“I know, I know,” he acknowledges, placing a hand on his stomach. “Been tryin’ to get Maria to give me some more patrol shifts, see if I can get some of the weight off. But hey, you try havin’ three square meals a day for the first time in twenty some odd years, see what it does to you, huh?” He pivots his attention back to the fireplace, and he seems to turn his body further away from you on purpose, so that you can’t see the round profile of his tummy as much.

“No! No, it, um… It suits you. I was gonna say you look good, actually.” You’re quick in your reply, trying to make it clear that you didn’t mean to offend him, without letting too much on.

He scoffs. “C’mon, you don’t gotta flatter me, sweetheart. I know I don’t exactly look the way you remember–”

“Joel, will you stop?” you interrupt, your voice laced with exasperation. “I’m being serious. Do I look like I’m making fun of you?”

He cranes his neck to look back at where you’re perched on the couch, and gives you a once over. “Guess not… Look a lil’ like somethin’ else, though, if I'm bein’ honest,” he says with a teasing smirk. And there he is again, the same quick-witted Joel you remember from back in the QZ.

You choose to engage in his banter, just to see where he’s going with it. “Oh yeah? And what’s that?”

He shrugs, beginning to mindlessly poke at the firewood again. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you look like you might like it.”

He’s just kidding around with you, trying to rile you up, you’re sure. But when he gets silence in return instead of the sound of you jumping to defend yourself with another playful jab, he turns to face you once more, and is met with your stunned expression.

“Oh…” Joel looks down at himself, then back to you again, just in time to catch your eyes flitting from his middle back up to his face. “What, you like ‘em big, sweetheart? ‘S that it?”

The truth is, you do, you always have. It was never a requirement, of course, as the guys you’d been with before Joel all had varying body types. But you’d be lying to yourself if you said that your eyes didn’t linger just a bit longer on guys with a little more to them, with wider arms and thicker legs and a softer middle. You’ve never admitted your preference to anyone before, and Joel calling you out on it now has your face running hot, skin feeling prickly as he sees through you like you’re made of glass.

“I-I don’t– I mean, I do, kinda, but not like that… Well, it is like that, I just mean–” You stumble over yourself, fearing you’ve revealed too much, wishing you could rewind the conversation and just tell him it was nice to see him again, plain and simple.

Joel lays the fire poker down on the granite ledge of the fireplace, approaching where you’re sitting and cupping the side of your face with his calloused hand.

“Sh, sh, stop, baby. ‘S alright if you do, nothin’ to be ashamed of,” he comforts, and it takes all the willpower you have left not to let your eyes drift down to his stomach, so close you could kiss it, if he’d let you.

“It’s just… I missed you. I thought about you all the time, wondered what ever happened to you after you left. Didn’t even know if you were alive until today. I’m just happy to see you… doing so well. To see that you’re healthy, and everything.” You swallow hard, hoping you sound convincing enough that he’ll let this go, forget all about your little admission just now. But of course, Joel is as stubborn as he’s ever been, and he doesn’t plan on releasing you from his trap now that you’re ensnared in it.

“That’s sweet, baby, ‘s real sweet,” Joel says, softly, stroking his thumb across your cheekbone as he speaks. “Thought about you too, all this time. Practically every day…” He rakes his eyes over you, noticing the way his touch has you starting to melt already, how you’re looking up at him with your wide, needy eyes. “Why don’t you show me just how much you missed me, hm? How much you love seein’ me healthy, as you put it.”

You’re stunned into silence once again, jaw slack and pupils wide as you search his gaze for proof that he’s just messing with you, making fun of you just to watch you squirm. But you don’t find any.

“O-okay,” you agree in a half-whisper.

Joel smiles down at you, satisfied. “All these years later, still just the sweetest thing, ain’t you? You still just as obedient, too?”

You nod without even thinking, words catching up with your instinctual response a second later. “Mhm, yeah, I am…” You had forgotten how easy it is to submit to him, how good it feels to let the hypnotizing tone of his voice carry you somewhere far away from yourself, when you need it the most. Whether it was after a shitty day of working for shittier rations in the QZ, or after a harsh trek in harsher weather to a forested oasis, Joel always knows how to make you feel like submission is your most natural state.

“Good… Kneel for me please, sweetheart,” he commands, and you obey immediately, his hand slipping from your face as you slide from the couch onto the woven carpet beneath you. Like second nature, your hands automatically fold themselves on your lap, remembering how you were never to touch Joel until he permitted you to. He takes note of this, and praises you accordingly. “Look at that, didn’t even have to ask. Such a good girl.”

He’s so enamored with you, he almost forgets where he was going with this until he watches your eyes flash to the growing bulge in his jeans, then back up to him. “Not tonight, sweetheart. Was thinkin’ you could put that pretty mouth to use on somethin’ different this time, hm?”

You knit your brows together, not sure what he means, but he doesn’t let you wonder for long. Slowly, he starts to unbutton his flannel shirt, starting at the top and working his way down. He tosses it onto the ground, then pulls his undershirt off over his head, adding it to the other discarded clothing. Without the confines of his slightly-too-tight button-up, you can see how much he really has filled out. Everything about his upper body is just a little more plush, with petal pink stretch marks adorning the soft skin in various places. You want to make it your personal mission to kiss each and every one of them, commit their exact coordinates on his body to memory.

There's a deep scar, you notice, to the left of his belly button, that has almost successfully disguised itself as one of those pretty marks. It’s definitely new since you saw him last, and it looks like it hurt, especially with the evidence of how crudely it had been stitched back together.

“What happened?” you wonder aloud, worried eyes glued to the healed injury.

He has to peer over the curve of his belly to see what you’re looking at. “Long story. Happened on my way out here, after I left Boston. Nothin’ for you to worry about, sweet girl, hardly even hurt. Forget it’s even there, most of the time,” he answers, still with a dominant edge to his voice that does a mostly good job of convincing you it’s the truth.

“Can… Can I?” you ask, waiting to receive his permission before you move your hands from your lap.

“Yeah, baby, go ahead,” Joel allows.

You reach out a small hand to gently trace over the raised scar, then press your lips to it with your hands splayed out on either side of your head, just barely pressing into his belly. He releases a soft groan, cradling the back of your head with one of his hands, applying the lightest amount of pressure to let you know this is where he wants to keep you.

“Why don’t you keep goin’, sweetheart? Gimme some more lovin’ like that, know you wanna,” he encourages, and you think you get the idea now, what it is he wanted to put your pretty mouth to use for.

With his explicit permission to continue, you don’t need telling twice. You move your face to hover just in front of his belly button, admiring the dense salt and pepper happy trail that sprouts from where his jeans push into his soft skin. You drag your tongue along the hair, nipping at the soft curve of where it disappears into the divot in his stomach. He makes a noise in response, half pained and half pleasured, but he doesn’t stop you. Just for good measure, you place a kiss to the little blushing mark where your teeth had scraped him.

Almost of their own volition, it seems, your hands begin to knead at his stomach as you make good on your promise to yourself to kiss every single one of his stretch marks. You allow your tongue to dart from your mouth on the last one, and Joel sucks in a breath.

“Oh, fuck. Forgot how good that wet lil’ mouth feels on me, sweetheart. Keep goin’,” he says, voice coming out strained. His fingers curl tightly into your hair, and he begins to maneuver your face around his belly. You lave your tongue over his skin as he does, slicking him with wet, sloppy kisses. “Yeah, baby, you fuckin’ worship it, show me how much you like me like this.”

It’s a little humiliating, but just enough that you like the feeling. You’re breathing hard and fast, letting out little whimpers as your fluttering cunt begins to soak your underwear. He brings your face to a stop at the most tantalizing part of him, the part that truly evidences how much more he’s allowed himself to indulge since settling in Jackson. The ample curve of flesh that just barely conceals the waistband of his jeans, the part you’ve wanted to get your mouth on since you first saw how it strained the lower buttons of his shirt. You latch onto it, massaging the skin around it as you use your teeth and tongue to suck a mark into him.

A growl rumbles from deep in his chest, and he curses under his breath. “Like it that much, huh? Fuck, naughty thing, look at you.”

You’re so fucking turned on, you’re shivering, rocking where you kneel and squeezing your thighs together in an attempt to get some kind of relief. You let one of your hands drift to the hard shape in Joel’s jeans, and it seems he’s enjoying this as much as you are. He spots your pathetic little squirms as you rut against nothing, and then he’s using his grip on your hair to pull you up from the floor.

“Got an idea. Up,” he commands roughly, and you detach your lips from his belly to obey his order. “Get these off, there we go.” He pulls down your sweatpants and underwear, helping you step out of them. “Christ, you’re soaked,” Joel teases, eyeing the sizable wet spot in your panties as he tosses them aside to join the other forgotten clothing. He reaches a hand toward the apex of your thighs, teasing your wet pussy and gathering some of your slick on two of his fingers. You let out a tiny yelp, but let him play with you, and then he’s bringing his fingers in front of his face and examining the sticky strings of your arousal when he spreads them apart. “All this just from lettin’ you worship all this, huh?” he taunts, patting his stomach once for emphasis. “Who’d’ve thought? Not that I’m complainin’...”

He quickly rids himself of his jeans and briefs, then reclines onto the couch with a quiet groan, stretching out his body along the length of it. Your mouth waters at the sight of his cock, hard and leaking as it bobs against his belly, his precum adding to the dampness still there from your tongue. “Come sit, sweetheart,” Joel says, softly, motioning with both of his hands for you to come closer.

You grip a hand onto the backrest of the couch to balance yourself while you move to straddle him, prepared to sink down onto his length for the first time in way too fucking long. “Uh uh, not there, baby,” he instructs, smirking when he sees how you hesitate in confusion. “Take a seat right here for me.” Again, he pats that most tempting area of his lower belly, and you just about fall apart at the sight of how his flesh ripples in the wake of it.

“Yeah, there you go, good girl,” he praises, both hands gripping your waist as he helps you settle your weight onto his soft abdomen.

“I dunno, don’t wanna hurt you–” you start, but he cuts you off swiftly.

“You won’t, baby. I’m a big man, ain’t I?” he teases, flashing you a devilish and knowing smile. “Go on, sweetheart, ride it.”

You inhale a shuddering breath, then place both of your hands on his shoulders to hold yourself up. You start an experimental buck into his belly, and that trail of dark hair tickles your clit so perfectly. It takes a few tries for you to get the positioning and pressure just right, and then you’re truly riding him, using his full stomach to get yourself off while he watches.

“God, that’s good. Use it, baby. You love me bigger, love that I’ve been eatin’ so good, prove it to me, c’mon,” Joel goads, and it spurs you on to grind against him harder, faster, as incoherent mumbles and curses tumble from your lips.

“Love it, Joel, you look so good, fuck. So fucking–mmh–so big, makes me so… so–”

“I know it does, sweet girl, I know. Makes you fuckin’ soaked is what it does, god damn. You gonna get my belly all messy, hm? Gonna rub your lil’ cunt all over it, get me all fuckin’ wet?”

“Uh huh, yeah, gonna… I’m gonna–” you whine, eyes shutting tight as your hips pick up their pace. You move your hands from his shoulders to place them on his stomach instead, grabbing at handfuls of his tummy in an effort to create something more solid to rub yourself against.

You’re already embarrassingly close, the humiliating edge to your earlier worship having gotten you most of the way there on its own. So swollen and sensitive it almost hurts, you won’t need much more to reach your high.

“Not without me, you ain’t. Gonna be right there with ya. You remember how we used to do it?” Joel asks, as if you could ever forget. He’s referring to your many late nights, early mornings, in his bed or in a back alley or wherever in the QZ, where he liked to make sure you both finished at the same time. You’d always be the first one to reach the edge, because he’d focus all his attention on getting you there before him, just to make you wait. It was never something punishing, just something he liked to do as an extra bit of control and dominance, and he knew it always made your orgasms that much more powerful and satisfying when he would finally permit you to let go.

With your eyes closed, so focused on your own pleasure, you hadn’t noticed that he had reached behind you to start fisting his cock some time ago. But you can hear it now, the wet schlick of his hand moving up and down his shaft as he works himself. “Hold it for me, sweetheart, I know you can. Keep rubbin’ your pretty pussy against me, jus’ like that, almost there…”

You mewl, screwing your face up as you force yourself to slow down your thrusts, muscles tense as you try to keep your orgasm at bay for as long as you can.

Thankfully, he must be worked up enough from seeing you fall apart for him so easily for the first time in so long, that his permission comes just a few minutes later.

“Come for me, babygirl, soak my fuckin’ belly, c’mon,” Joel growls, and you fall forward immediately, twitching and spasming and crying out into the soft muscle of his shoulder as you ride out the shuddering shocks of your orgasm. He groans next to your ear as he comes, and you can feel the warm ropes of his own release as some of them land on your lower back. You’re both wet, heaving messes, as you embrace each other for the second time today and work on catching your breath.

So exhausted from the day you had, you must’ve fallen asleep against his chest as you laid there, because then you’re being woken up by the dull scratch of his fingertips against your scalp and his familiar voice working its way through the thick fog that clouds your tired brain.

“You alright, baby?” he asks, and you can hear that he’s smiling, amused at this sleepy little thing he’s got clinging to him.

“Mhm, jus’ tired,” you answer, a barely-there mumble of a sentence.

“I’ll bet… You wanna get cleaned up? Get all tucked into bed?”

You shake your head against his neck, and he chuckles.

“No? Whatcha wanna do then, hm?”

“Jus’ lay here. Missed you. Don’t wanna let… go…”

Your sentence drifts off into silence before the temptation of sleep allows you to finish it, but Joel gets the idea. He smiles to himself, kissing the top of your head, and hugs you closer. Both of you are still sticky and damp, but satisfied. And together again. And that’s a hell of a lot better than the alternative.

So he agrees, and you stay like that for the rest of the night. Joel doesn’t worry about whether or not he remembered to set his alarm clock for his extra patrol shift the next morning, or if he’ll even hear it all the way from his bedroom upstairs, because it doesn’t matter anyway. He has you, and you made it very clear tonight just how much you like him exactly the way he is.

Maybe, your rose garden can finally begin to bloom, now that the pair of you have somewhere safe and comfortable and healthy to try your hand at nurturing it again.

tag list: @beefrobeefcal @iamasaddie @rebel-held @dilfgestivo @zliteraturehoe @joeldjarin @kamcrazy123 @hellowoolf @rexamongthestars @stevie75 @luxurychristmaspudding @noisynightmarepoetry @mewantpeepaw @pedritoferg (if your name is crossed out, it won’t let me tag you!!)

#my writing #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x you #the last of us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #daddy!joel miller #joel miller smut

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ellebakers · 9 months ago

Text

☆ My love (+18)

Aemond Targaryen x reader (twin sister)

Summary : Being Aemond's twin sister is a good thing, he is gentle with you, always kind and affectionate because you are his twin but also his wife, but with the others, he is cruel and you have more than enough of it.

Warnings : Smut, slight angst, language, incest.

You would be his wife, that's what your mother Queen Alicent decided when she gave birth to you, three minutes after Aemond. And until today everything was perfect between you, obviously as a child there was only platonic love and joy, over the years this love was transformed into desire especially for Aemond who knew that you were going to be his but who had to watch you become a woman without being able to touch you, suffice to say that your wedding night was not very relaxing..

“To these three strong boys.”

You let out a sigh as you heard your husband's cruel words directed towards your nephews.

In a split second things escalated, Jace hit your husband and Aegon slammed Lucerys onto the table, everyone stood up, screaming and panicking.

Aemond wore a smirk as he turned to you, hoping to see you laugh at the situation, but it was a tired and cold look that you gave him, shaking your head.

You got up from the table and informed your mother "It's time for me to retire mother, have a good night."

Hearing your nonchalant tone of voice, Alicent offered you a sad smile "Of course my dear."

Aemond watched you leave the room, a little disappointed that you didn't appreciate his provocation.

You sighed and walked towards the nursery where one of the maids was sitting, watching your daughter, you smiled tenderly and whispered to the maid "You can go and rest, I'll keep Aenora in our marital bedroom."

The servant bowed "Of course princess, I inform you that Aenora does not want to drink my milk, it is possible that she will ask for it later."

You smiled and nodded, taking the little girl, only three months old, into your arms.

The small Valeryan looked at you, cooing as you stroked her cheek while taking her to your room.

When you arrived, Aemond was sitting on your bed, waiting for you, he raised his head when you entered. “I told myself that my wife had fled the castle.” He tried to joke.

You didn't bother to answer, settling into your reading chair you kept Aenora close to you, rocking her lightly.

“Did I do something to make you angry ?” Aemond asked with a hint of sadness in his voice.

You sighed. “Why do you have to be so cruel to everyone other than me ?”

He sat down next to you "You are my wife, the love of my life, I only need to be nice to you and our daughter."

You shook your head slightly and handed him Aenora. “Take her, I have to change.”

Aemond grabbed the baby and wrapped his arms around her, smiling tenderly at her as you stood up to take off your dress.

"You know what I'm talking about, why did you need to tell our nephews that ?"

Aemond scoffed "Because it's the truth, they're bastards."

You gave him a cold look. “Don’t use that kind of language in front of our daughter.”

He chuckled "She's four months old honey, she can't understand."

Once changed into your nightgown which left nothing to the imagination, you sat down again next to Aemond. “Even if that is true, why do you constantly need to remind this poor childrens of that ?"

Aemond scoffed, his jaw clenched. "Children? They're men, didn't you see the way Jacaerys was looking at your breasts ?"

You frowned a little, not paying attention to the way your nephew was looking at you. “What are you talking about ?”

"My love, you should stop thinking that everyone has good intentions. Jacaerys almost had a hard-on looking at your dress hugging your chest."

You slapped his shoulder, laughing lightly, “Stop.”

Aemond smiled "It's my role as a husband to protect you and if I can humiliate these.." He was about to say an insult but seeing your look he did nothing "Boys.. by the same opportunity, so I do it."

You rolled your eyes and smiled "You're stubborn, are you aware of that ?"

He smiled and kissed your lips “That’s why you love me.”

Aenora started to get agitated and cry, Aemond handed her over to you, understanding that the little girl was probably hungry.

You lowered the strap of your nightgown, letting your left breast come out, and the little girl hastened to put it in her mouth to extract the milk.

After a moment you saw Aemond moving out of the corner of your eye, pulling on his pants that were becoming too tight.

“Don’t tell me that seeing me breastfeed turns you on?”

Aemond couldn't help but moan "Can you blame me ? It's been a week since I've been able to touch you... do you have any idea of the torture you're inflicting on me ?"

You couldn't help but laugh, "You're insatiable." Aemond came closer and nibbled on your neck making you moan slightly, thanks to the gods Aenora had finished drinking and was starting to fall asleep.

You gently placed him in his little bed, and as you turned to face Aemond, he threw himself at you, kissing you furiously.

You stepped back and fell on the bed, your twin took the opportunity to lift your nightgown, he pulled on your thighs, bringing you a little closer to him.

You propped yourself up on your elbows, looking up at him lustfully, he maintaining eye contact with you as he knelt down and attached his mouth to your pussy.

You gasped and threw your head back, your hand came to his hair instinctively, pushing his head a little closer to your pussy to feel even more pleasure.

“Lords.” You moaned and moved your hips as he continued to devour you, his tongue working magic as you arched up moaning harder each time, and when you felt the orgasm approaching you grabbed a pillow and put it on your move to cover your cry of pleasure so as not to wake Aenora.

Once recovered from your orgasm, you looked up at Aemond and saw him take off his pants, leaving him with his tunic, he grabbed his hard cock let his hand slide over it to harden it a little more, once ready he grabbed a pillow and put it under your pelvis, then, with these firm hands he grabbed your thighs and spread them a little further.

You closed your eyes and gasped as his length entered you slowly and deliciously.

“Still so tight.” He whispered to you, letting out a moan in your ear. “So hot, wet and good… you’re perfect.”

The act was so sensual and romantic, different from what he used to do before your daughter was born.

“Aemond.” You cried with pleasure.

He grabbed your thighs, wrapping them around his hips, he continued his slow and terribly delicious movements, you felt every inch of his length as he moved in and out.

"My love." He moaned, with his fingertips he pulled down the top of your nightgown, exposing your breasts to him, he grabbed the left breast, licking and sucking your nipple, extracting some of your milk while he massaged the other.

Having enough of his slow movements you swapped positions.

He let out a groan of pleasure, you placed your hand over his mouth "Shh, you're going to wake up Aenora." He smiled against your hand and gave you a thrust making you moan.

You started moving on his cock quickly making you moan mutually

"That's my little dragon." He groaned, running a hand over your face, letting his thumb brush over your lips, you grabbed it and sucked on it while looking at Aemond.

He growled and slid his hand between your legs, playing with your clit, and in no time he had a hand over your mouth as you came, letting out cries of pleasure.

It was up to you to shut him up with your lips on his mouth as he finished inside you after you clenched your pussy around his length.

You pulled yourself off of him and dropped to his side with one last moan, both of your bodies sweating, out of breath.

He turned and kissed your lips while caressing your breasts “I love you.”

"I love you too." You sighed, trying to catch your breath.

After a while you fell into a deep sleep, but before you fell asleep you heard Aemond's words as he stroked your hair.

My love...

#house of the dragon #hotd x y/n #aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen x you #aemond targaryen x female reader #aemond targaryen x y/n

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starcurtain · 2 months ago

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Hey! I apologize if this question has been asked before since it seems like a pretty obvious one, but where do you think the idea of Aventurine being a sex slave came from? Other than the obvious factor of it being something fun for the fandom to mess around with, I mean.

It's something I kind of took for granted as being true before playing his quest, but after finishing it I realized there wasn't really any indication. The only thing I can really think of is his master's comments about him having a good body. Is there anything in his behavior you can think of that would lead to this conclusion if it wasn't a popular fan interpretation already/kind of just an easy conclusion to reach with a slave character?

(also kind of related but what do you think of the idea that he sleeps around/with his clients to make deals? he's obviously willing to sexualize himself with the boob window, but that doesn't necessarily mean he goes further.)

As far as I can tell, the idea that Aventurine was involved in sexual slavery comes from three (maybe four) places:

First, the comment from the master about Aventurine's appearance. People were holding this comment up as refutable proof that Aventurine was used in sexual slavery on top of being tossed into the Hunger Games; however, the response from other players on this interpretation, especially the Chinese side of the fandom, was very mixed, with a lot of people pointing out that the context in the game probably meant the slave master was talking about Aventurine's ability to attract attention from fans watching the literal Sigonian Hunger Games, rather than having a direct sexual-slavery connotation.

Second, the comment from Sparkle about stripping naked and getting on his knees for Sunday. This one has way more implication in English than I think it might for an Eastern audience, actually. In English, this pretty much sounds like Sparkle saying Aventurine trades sexual favors for success in his gambles. However, I suspect the original intention in Chinese was more about humiliation. Western audiences don't have as much history with honor-based prostration, i.e. accepting corporal humiliation as a form of reconciliation that Eastern audiences might be more familiar with. And in any case, Sparkle is Sparkle. She probably just went for the lowest blow she could think of here.

Third, the general assumption that if Sigonian slaves were being chained, branded, beaten, sent to death matches, etc., it seems logical that they would also be taken advantage of in other ways. I honestly think this is probably the fairest take--many, many real slaves around the world faced (and still face!) sexual abuse, so if slaves from Sigonia were treated so poorly you could make them fight to the death for entertainment, it stands to reason they were probably also not safe from other forms of assault. We also have no idea what happened to Kakavasha in any of the years between his being a tiny child fleeing the massacre and then being purchased as a slave as a late-teens-early-twenties person. That's a very long time for a child to have to survive on their own on an extremely hostile planet and not face risks of all kinds or end up needing to do unspeakable things to survive. So I think this is at least not that far-fetched, although it's important to say there's nothing in the game that directly confirms this.

And fourth: I read a tweet semi-recently that stated that one of the Chinese (or maybe it was Japanese) names for a quest Aventurine was involved in was actually a reference to a book about a teenage sexual assault survivor. However, when I tried to verify this myself, I couldn't find any quest Aventurine was in that was based on a book about sexual assault in either English, Chinese, or Japanese. It's possible I just missed something, but I'm taking this one with a bit of a grain of salt currently, since I can't confirm it personally.

Regarding your other question, about whether I think Aventurine sleeps around to make deals...

I definitely think he does not, for one major reason.

First, I will admit that Aventurine is definitely willing to use his appearance to his advantage. This is pretty obvious. He wears incredibly flashy clothes, baths himself in cologne, overloads on glittering golden jewels, and absolutely calls attention to his appearance when working with clients.

We see him actively doing this in his Moment Among the Stars video, where he is clearly using his looks as an equal tool (to his wealth), to daze his target.

It's not an accident that he says things like "Use me as you wish," with all the explicit connotations preserved. The implication is there. However, unless he was absolutely backed into a corner, I think that implication is all it will ever be.

The reason I think this is that the devs go out of their way to give Aventurine three fairly noticeable physical behaviors in his in-game scenes:

For one, he has some of the most closed off body language of any character in the game.

Aventurine's default conversation pose is arms crossed directly and tightly in front of himself. This is like "Defensive Body Language 101." By crossing your arms, you put a symbolic barrier between yourself and the person you're speaking to, and also ensure that your hands are up and available in case you actually need to physically defend yourself.

Virtually all of Aventurine's conversations take place from this stance, no matter who he is speaking to (from the Trailblazer all the way to Topaz). He deliberately closes his pose off and tightens up his silhouette, which just sends a glaring "Don't touch me" message.

This closing off is also blatantly apparent when you compare it to the deliberately open poses he strikes while trying to make himself seem accessible to others (like tempting clients) or seem powerful (to intimidate):

Complementing this habit of closing himself off is a second noticeable aspect of his body language: He frequently avoids eye contact to the point that he even holds conversations while entirely facing away from the person he's speaking to.

I might be a bit lenient and say maybe he's doing this to on purpose to be mysterious, whoo~~ But... in all honestly, he just does this with everyone, even with Ratio while trying to talk about an actual important issue (wanting to look into Acheron's real identity). Hell, even the fake Aventurine does it to himself!

We can even say that wearing the rose-tinted glasses in the first place is another intentional barrier, one Aventurine deliberately removes in specific moments to give people the (false) impression that he's "letting them in" to his circle:

Now, this might be a bit more complicated in Aventurine's case, because eye contact has a whole extra meaning when eyes are the defining trait of your species and come with particularly challenging racial stereotypes. So it may be that Aventurine is simply used to conducting conversation while looking away to minimize racial prejudice against his eyes' unique appearance.

However, I'd also argue that the devs deliberately turned his entire model away in cutscene after cutscene to create a clear sense of being inaccessible, unapproachable, and unwilling to engage in the physical intimacy of standing closely, directly facing, and staring at his conversation partners.

While he faces away, he controls both the figurative and the literal direction of conversation, forcing people to keep their eyes on him while he is free to move as he pleases. Over and over again, it just says "I want to be the one in control. I'm not afraid to show my back to you, but you are not welcome to come near me."

And, in fact, that's a third aspect of his character's body language that I am sure the devs did not include accidentally: More so than other characters, many of Aventurine's conversations are conducted from weirdly far distances. Like, half the time he's talking, he's standing all the way on the opposite side of the room!

This habit of speaking from a-larger-than-normal distance is apparent in the first scene with Himeko...

And then in just about every other conversation too:

The bubble is twenty feet in every direction.

Like yes, he does approach and have conversations like a normal person... sometimes... But it is significantly more noticeable with Aventurine than with other characters that he often conducts whole conversations--even with his allies--from a distance. Just genuinely weirdly far apart.

Leaving space for Gaiathra, I guess.

And it's because these significant decisions were made with Aventurine's in-game body language that, when he deliberately alters his own behavior, it is instantaneously noticeable.

In 2.0, he closes the distance, the glasses come off, and he gets directly up in the Trailblazer's face.

It's uncomfortable not just because the player is suddenly being loomed over, but because this behavior has already been subconsciously established for the player as out of character for Aventurine.

The barriers the character himself was putting up are deliberately stripped away so that he can use physicality and demanding eye contact to intimidate his target. He has to reverse his own normal body language in order to come across as domineering (and, I guess if you're into that, appealing in a domineering manner).

And ummmm, just a tiny aside here because I can't resist:

This does mean that when the game goes out of its way to demonstrate Aventurine altering his own normal habit of distant and defensive body language, it is absolutely intentional.

Yes, this is a Ratiorine post in disguise. There literally isn't any other character in the game that Aventurine is shown being comfortable standing so close to and interacting with in this manner. This doesn't occur in every one of their scenes, but Ratio is the only character that this happens with repeatedly. It's not an accident that the devs literally added "They were walking side-by-side" as flavor text.

But look, I'll be fair: There's a great example of this in Aventurine's scene with Acheron too, where he closes the distance and attempts to make eye contact with her--seeking her guidance and closeness--and she is actually the one stepping away, speaking with her back turned, demonstrating her power and control (and issues with connection!) in that scene.

Anyway, this was a whole longggg tangent into analyzing Aventurine's body language, but my point is that, overall, the devs deliberately adjusted his model's actions in-game to give the impression of a person who clearly wants to be in control of every interaction he has with other people, who insists on distance over intimacy, and whose stances and habits suggest that he is significantly less accessible and open than his "Use me as you wish" motto might suggest.

Long story longer, I think that there is almost zero chance Aventurine is willingly ceding control over himself or the actions expected of him to anyone he isn't 100% comfortable with, and I think that using physical intimacy of any kind would be an absolute last resort for him. Frankly, he comes across as more likely to shoot himself in the foot than let someone he doesn't trust lay hands on him.

To me, he reads very much as "You may look, but you may not touch."

#honkai star rail #aventurine #honkai star rail meta #ratiorine #aventio #lowkey though #body language analysis #I fully respect people's sexy Aventurine headcanons #and I read many many fanfics too lol #but as far as what we're shown in-game is concerned #I think Aventurine would rather eat live scorpions than kiss a stranger #don't get me wrong #I think Aventurine will always do what he NEEDS to do #to win the gamble complete the mission etc.#BUT I also think #that he is FAR more likely to jump off a bridge to solve his problems #to commit MURDER to solve his problems #than use himself as a (literal) honey trap #it seems to me that this would be the last resort and only the last resort ever #not out of a desire to avoid sex or anything #but simply because of the issue of control #any form of vulnerability that would leave him at another person's whims #seems off the table unless absolutely absolutely necessary

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bluecollarmcandtf · 4 months ago

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Fast Food Snack

My story starts with a close, but I'm hungry...

An intimidating glare from the baggy-eyed manager tells me to back the fuck off, but I have no intention of leaving. I'm starving and this asshole has no idea who he's staring at! After all, how could an old fast-food worker named Darryl know that I just discovered the ability to control dumb little minds like his?

"Open up," I say, licking my lips at the feeling of inserting myself into his head.

Mind control isn't like how it's portrayed in movies. I don't just snap my fingers and bring victims into a vacantly drooling state. No! It's much more invasive than that, and it's much, much more unpleasant for my poor targets. Imagine a sickeningly stiff presence pushing through the back of your skull. It shoves your own ideas and intentions aside, ripping away the control you had over your body. You probably always took that control for granted, but now you can't cause so much as the blinking of an eyelid. Most people spend their time in my thrall screaming internally.

Being sidelined in your own body takes some getting used to, and Darryl isn't enjoying it in the slightest. Nevertheless, I use his hands to unlock the front door and invite myself inside.

"Please, come in," I make his gravelly voice speak, "Can I suck your dick as an apology?"

I feel the man cringe on the inside. He hates hearing and feeling his own mouth make such a vulgar offer, but his stoic face doesn't crack. This idiot is trapped inside his own mind while I get to puppet around his body. I don't even have to tell him what to do.

"Maybe later," I pinch the manager's cheek, "Let's get you deep-fried and seasoned first."

With a vice grip on his brain, I steer the fast-food worker off to do my bidding. Humiliating my playthings is the perfect appetizer...

Darryl spends the next few minutes collecting all the leftover food from the garbage, dumping it all over himself. The manager doesn't stop there, proceeding to lay on the floor and rub all the grease and ketchup into his clothes. That trademark glare stays frozen on his face the entire time he soaks in the day's old fries and ketchup.

"I'm a messy little bitch," he states blandly from the ground, "And an ugly, dumb, low-life."

His words make me chuckle, even though I'm the one making him say it. My metaphorical arm is rammed up his ass like a ventriloquist with a dummy. It's also me that's puppeting his hands to rub the food into the pits of his polo and the crotch of his khakis.

"You really should've just let me inside," I purr with my own mouth, "Now I'm gonna make you act like a messy bitch forever."

Darryl's face remains unbothered, but I feel the real man panic inside. If he had control over his eyes right now, they would be bulging in pure terror. Instead, they gaze passively back at me from the floor.

"Boss? Where'd you go?" a smooth voice interrupts my fun with Darryl.

A tall, dark, and handsome young man walks out from the back kitchen. His thick arms and bushy beard make me salivate. The name tag on his juicy pec reads 'Josh' but there's plenty of other things I'd rather call a stud like him.

"I thought you said we'd leave early if we got everything cleaned up," he grunts quietly.

The handsome fool is too preoccupied with wiping down tables to notice his manager rolling in grease and condiments. Briefly glimpsing in his mind tells me that he wants to finish his shift as quickly as possible, but I won't be letting him off work any time soon.

He jumps when he finally notices me, startled to find a customer still lurking after closing hours. His scowl shortly returns to his face as he pushes out his chest to address me.

"We're closed. You need-" his voice cuts as I commandeer his heavy body and thick neck.

With me in control, Josh's autonomy is squeezed into a corner of his skull, but he still retains all his senses; feeling his muscles relax, licking his salty lips, taking a deep breath of greasy air, and staring at his new master. I make him walk forward until his bulging chest is brushing against my own.

"I can give you a much better show than that dried-up, old, dishrag," I make him say, gesturing to Darryl with his broad hands, "My man-tits are fat and juicy just for you. Let me be your little slut. Fuck me like the breedable piece of meat I am."

Internally, Josh is furious, but his voice doesn't waver as he delivers the words I wrote for him. He's like a Ken doll I'm playing with, only none of it is pretend.

"I think I'd prefer dinner and a show," I giggle, "Why don't we let that dried-up, old, dishrag fuck your ass. He is your boss, after all."

Josh doesn't visibly react to the idea. He doesn't wince or crack the scowl I'd left on his handsome face. He just marches to the back and lays himself out on the dirty floor. Darryl follows, per the instructions I'm pumping into each of his limbs.

"Give it to me hard, boss," Josh says in a low monotone.

"Prepare for a rough ride, muscle-slut." Darryl answers his employee dryly.

Of course, internally, both men are freaking out. It's hard to tell who's more panicked; the manager who's about to dog-fuck his employee, or the roided up gym-rat who's about to take it like a bitch. Darryl wants nothing more than to pull Josh off the floor and run out of the building, but I hold his body firmly in place, making the man unbuckle his stained khakis like he's about to get lucky. Josh is the same, desperately trying to break free and attack, but I've got full control over his bulky body. I make him stick out his tongue and lick the floor like a pathetically horny animal. He still has to taste every inch.

"Papa's ready for ya," Darryl moans, pulling out the cock I easily inflated to full mast.

"Hurry Papa!" Josh squirms as he thumbs his pants below his wiggling bubble butt.

"What the hell?" a nervous voice stutters.

Turning, I find a much less impressive man walking into the kitchen. His name tag reads 'Aaron' and he must've been bullied into cleaning the bathrooms for the last twenty minutes. He's missed a lot, but it doesn't take long for me to catch him up.

"I'm enjoying a meal here!" I bite, mildly annoyed, "Shut up and make yourself useful."

His mind folds instantly to my efforts, and I know exactly how to put him to use. Aaron snaps his mouth, marches around before me, and kneels. Without a single breath of pause, his hands unzip my jeans and pull out my aching penis. He swallows it whole, bobbing his head expertly. Aaron's never done this before, but I've had a few blow jobs and I know exactly how I like it; with a throat wide open and lips at the base.

"Continue," I sigh in pleasure towards Josh and Darryl.

The pair unfreeze, resuming the messed up porno I'm forcing them to star in. The manager leans into Josh's back and enters him from behind. "You're gonna have to take Daddy's dick every time we close. Got it, boy?" he grunts down at his employee. The bearded stud looks up to his boss, and sucks some of the various condiments out of the man's stained shirt. "Yes, sir. I want to end every day like this, here, with you inside me." Darryl continues slapping his groin into Josh's splayed rear, pushing the younger man's face against the cold damp floor.

It isn't long before Aaron's expert dick-sucking leaves me cumming in his stomach. Finally, I'm satiated. "FfuuuuUUUuuuUucck..." I grunt out a long guttural moan of relief.

When my eyes flutter open, I see the mess I've left in this little restaurant...

The three men stop with the act; Aaron pauses, my dick still halfway down his throat; Josh freezes in the middle of writhing with fake pleasure; Darryl even ceases his brutal rape of his employee despite never reaching a climax. None of it matters anymore. My rocks have gotten off, so my little puppet show is over. I'm left with three terrified fast-food workers with broken wills.

"Sorry guys," I pull away and zip up my pants, "I get a little carried away when I'm horny."

"It's, ok," they all answer back nonchalantly, but I can hear their true thoughts screaming, locked away somewhere in their minds.

With a wave of my hand, I wipe the experience from their memories. I turn off their consciousness and set Darryl, Josh, and Aaron on autopilot. Like actors in a bad hypnotism movie, they rise and get back to their nightly chores. This time, their jaws are slack and their eyes are vacant. They'll finish closing down the restaurant and go home, where they'll scrub themselves clean and get a long night of rest. By tomorrow, all of the psychological and physical remnants of what I've done will be gone.

For them, it'll be like I never set foot inside this place. For me, I'll have to pretend that I didn't just become an evil and sadistic super villain. I never did end up eating any food, but I did satisfy some sort of hunger inside me...

...at least for now.

I let my urges get the better of my powers. Being a mind controller is hard. I can barely even control my own mind at times. Wandering away from the isolated, little, restaurant, I wonder how long it'll take before I lose control of myself again...

To be continued?

#gay mind control #degredation kink #humiliated slave #hypno story #ChaptersofaMindControllerslife

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spngi · 4 months ago

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My tears ricochet | mafia!carlos sainz jr x reader

Prologue

part 1 | part 2

summary: Mr. and Mrs. Sainz lived in a dream for many years, now everything is falling apart and they need to deal with their feelings

warnings: Grammar mistakes, citation of violence, Carlos is an idiot, mentions of cheating

Carlos Sainz Jr was a true gentleman, a loyal and kind companion, a loving lover. A captivating man who won me over at first glance, with his chocolate-colored eyes and million-dollar smile. I didn't know who Carlos really was until I became deeply involved with him, until I realized I loved him so much that it wouldn't make any difference if he were a prince, a fisherman, or a mobster.

I met Carlos at the art gallery where I worked in Madrid; he was charming, affectionate, and too perfect to be true. He made efforts to create perfect dates and show all the affection he had for me; loving Carlos was as easy as breathing.

He was always very open about his feelings, his plans for the future, but he avoided revealing what his job was as much as possible. I tried to guess, after all, there aren't many job options in the market that could justify a huge mansion and the need for many security guards around him, but I never succeeded.

It took him a year to open up about his illicit activities to me, perhaps pressured by fate with subtle gestures. Before I could find out on my own, Carlos came clean.

I loved him deeply, but a woman has her limits and there are things I can't tolerate. I loved him infinitely, but thinking about all the things he did or was involved in made me sick. I had to overlook many things to be with him because, after all, I loved him, and that was what mattered, right?

"A monster is not a monster when you love it." This phrase was never more true. Carlos was never a monster to me, even after he told me all the terrible things he had done. I would still love him anyway.

Carlos loved me for five years, loved me while we timidly got to know each other, loved me when I tried to leave his life, loved me with all my mess when I moved into his house, loved me on our wedding day as we shared tears, loved me through three wedding anniversaries. But he didn't love me when I had to mature, when I realized that in the life we were living, you either bite or get bitten, when I realized that staying clean-handed would only bring me grief and sadness.

He began to distance himself gradually: the bed seemed too far away, he kept his hugs at bay, stayed late at the office to avoid sharing a bed, left early from our house to avoid breakfast together. I spared no effort to keep him close, planned dinners he would make excuses not to attend, tried to surprise him at the office only to be chased away. Then came the day he decided to move rooms. I was startled to enter the room we shared, where we had been so happy, now empty, without his clothes, without his pillow, without his bath products.

It hurt too much to see him so distant. He claimed he needed time to think, but there was no emotion in his words. We were both scared of what had happened in the previous months. After the incident where they tried to hurt me, I needed my husband's help. I wanted him to protect me, I needed his support, needed to be strong like him and not just his helpless wife.

Even after all my efforts to make him love me again, he never returned to our room. Then the girl came into the story. A woman's intuition is funny; I knew the moment he came home on a certain day that he had found another woman. Even with all the moments I tried to change Carlos's mind, using every possible means and humiliating myself more than I would allow at any other time, nothing stopped that moment from arriving.

"What is this?" I ask, not daring to touch the envelope in front of me.

"They're the divorce papers, y/n..." Carlos sighs, appearing for the first time in a long time for breakfast. "I tried to be as fair as possible, but you can look at them and then we'll negotiate."

"There will be no negotiation, Carlos! Because there will be no divorce," I reply, trying to stay firm. This day seemed close, but something in me still refused to believe it would come. Something in me refused to accept that I would have to divorce Carlos. This was just a phase, something that happens to any couple; we didn't need to be extremists.

"Y/n... please, be rational. We can't prolong this; it's the best way out for both of us," he tries to negotiate.

"And I disagree with your opinion. My God, Carlos! We're talking about our marriage! You didn't even try to give us a chance," I respond, frustrated.

"There's no solution anymore, y/n..." he murmurs to me, and that breaks me even more.

"I won't sign them, Carlos," I push the envelope away from me. The wedding ring gleams on my left hand with the movement, a simple touch of irony to the whole situation.

English is not my first language.

Leave your comments and opinions ❤️

#carlos sainz #cs55 x reader #cs55 #carlos sainz x reader #máfia!carlos sainz #f1 x reader #au!carlos sainz #f1 imagine #fórmula 1 #f1 fanfic #angst

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bridellashiper · 2 months ago

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My Darling Dove

Paring : Bridget x VK! reader

Genre : Fluff/comfort

Fandom : Descendants: The Rise of Red

promot : being a VK isn't easy, nor is being related to Hook, especially when a group of VK'S who think their tough shit starts making trouble towards yourself beloved girlfriend, who just so happens to be the sweetest girl this school has met.

''My dove, I...'' Your voice trailed off as your pink haired sweetheart came into view. Green paint colouring her clothes and face. And the smell was horrible. The paint smelt old and crusted, and the paint itself looked even worse, it looked like a old worn out faded colour of green

You sighed inwardly, you knew how humiliating it was for Bridget, yet she always managed to pull through and forgive.

It was one of the reasons you were so drawn to her, she was sweet, too sweet for her own good but you'd make sure she knew when to stop being so nice to everyone.

''Uliana...I tried, again, today with the cookies but...'' Bridget muttered, attempting to smile but it did little to conceal how she truly felt, and your heart ached for her. You'd already told Uliana there was no need to be so harshly rude towards her.

''Come now, dove, let's get you cleaned up and you can tell me all about it later on, yes?'' You felt guilty, guilty because you'd tried your best in the most subtle way possible. But your effects never seemed to work. No matter how little or subtle they were.

''Oh, no, honey, it's okay. Really I'm fine, it's just a little paint...she'll come around, eventually.'' You hummed dryily and shook your head, taking her hand in yours and lifting in gesture as if you were helping her climb stairs.

''You'know, you don't have to do..this, right? I'm a princess, I can do it myself.'' Bridget giggled softly, a slow but warm crimson blush coaxing her cheeks as she smiled at you.

You brushed off her concerns with a wave of your hand and grinned. ''Please, I'm the sister of Hook, my dove. Everything we hooks do is to charm and impress our lovers.''

Bridget laughed, a sound like tinkling bells that always made your heart feel lighter, even in moments like these. But behind her laughter, you could still sense the lingering hurt, the weight of the day pressing down on her delicate shoulders.

You led her to the washroom, where a basin of warm water awaited. Gently, you dipped a cloth into the water and began wiping away the remnants of the day—the streaks of green paint that marred her soft skin, the smudges that stained her clothes.

The task was tender, almost reverent, as you worked in silence, the unspoken understanding between you two growing stronger with each careful stroke.

Bridget watched you with wide, adoring eyes, the blush still staining her cheeks. ''You know,'' she murmured, ''I don't deserve you, Hook or not.''

You paused, looking into her eyes, the intensity of your feelings threatening to spill over. ''Do not say such nonsense, Bridget. You are worth more than you realize. And you do deserve me, just as much as I deserve you.''

She bit her lip, her gaze dropping to the floor. ''But I always seem to mess things up… Uliana, the others… I'm not sure I fit in.''

You set the cloth down and cupped her face, forcing her to meet your eyes. ''Bridget, My Darling girl, listen to me. You are perfect just the way you are. The others, they may not see it, but I do. You are kind, patient, and forgiving—things that are worth more than any skill or talent. And if anyone fails to see that, then it is their loss, not yours.''

A tear escaped her eye, trailing down her cheek, and you caught it with your thumb. ''But… I want them to like me, too. I want to be someone they can rely on, not just a burden.''

You sighed, your heart aching for her. ''Oh, my dove, You are not a burden, Bridget. You're a blessing. And if they can't see that, then they are the ones who need to change, not you.''

She nodded slowly, her resolve hardening even as a vulnerability shone in her eyes. ''Maybe… maybe you're right.''

You smiled softly, pressing a kiss to her forehead. ''I know I am. Now, let's finish getting you cleaned up, and then we'll use that cook book of yours to make something deliciously sweet, Hm?''

Bridget's smile returned, more genuine this time, as she leaned into your touch. ''Okay, Honey. Thank you.''

As you finished cleaning her up, you both sat down on the small couch in the corner of the room, the day's weight slowly lifting. You knew this wouldn't be the last time Bridget faced such trials from Uliana, but as long as you were by her side, you'd make sure no one hurt her again.

#lesbianism #descendants #descendants: the rise of red #bridget of hearts #sister of hook #Bridget x FEM reader #fluff/comfort #mentions of bullying #descendants red

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volklana · 24 days ago

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If Only You Could See Yourself Through My Eyes

Titles Comes From This Song:

Request: I have an idea for a one-shot with Sihtric for the future, where the girlfriend doesn’t allow him to tell his friends that they’re dating, and he starts to feel sad, confronts her, and discovers that she feels too ugly to be with him.

My darling wangjiangelangel I really hope I did your idea justice and I'm so sorry for the long wait ❤️❤️

Warnings: Reader is definitely struggling with self image issues, possibly body dysmorphia- If that's not something you feel able to read right now there is no pressure you can catch me next time xx

Sihtric collapsed down on the bed beside you trying to catch his breath.

He placed his forearm over his eyes as he came down from his high.

You padded into the kitchen to fetch a glass of water and he watched you in awe as you walked back to bed.

“How did I get so lucky,” he mused and you felt the heat rush to your cheeks, unable to take the compliment so you brushed it off.

You snuggled into Sihtric’s chest, your ear pressed against his skin, you listened to the steady beat of his heart, as he absentmindedly ran his fingers up and down the naked skin of your back.

You could not quite believe that you got to be with him like this, by some fluke, or mistake from the universe you got to love him.

You had been friends with Sihtric for years now. You had been there for all the heartbreaks, all the great loves, all the situationships and by some utterly divine mystery he had chosen to pursue you.

You, who had carried a flame for him from the very first moment you met him.

Who had accepted your place as his friend and expected nothing more from him.

Until his last relationship failed and he made a point of pursuing you.

“I think the reason it's never worked out with any of these other girls,” he confessed into the darkness one night “Is because it's always been you. All this time it's been you.”

He'd sat up suddenly to look into your eyes “I thought I was so protective of you because you were my friend but it's always been so much more than that hasn't it?”

You wanted to believe that was the case with all your heart but your head told you it was simply because he had exhausted all his other options that he now found himself in your arms, in your bed. But you weren’t complaining, you were just happy that you got to share this time with him.

“When can we tell the guys?” he asked, disturbing your inner thoughts, ear still pressed to his chest.

“I don't want to keep lying to them,” he sighed “I don't want to end every night out in separate taxis just to end up in the same bed anymore. It feels dishonest and I don't want to hide us anymore.”

You sighed and traced a finger along his chest “Can't we keep it between us just a little while longer? You know how the guys are, they will be all up in our business and I would just like you to myself that little bit longer.”

He smiled a beautiful and shy smile, but relented.

“Just promise me we will tell them soon. I'm beginning to think you're ashamed to be seen with me.”

Your heart sank into your stomach because it was very much the opposite, you did not think you were good enough for Sihtric in the slightest. He looked like he was carved from the gods, his muscles were no joke and his mop of dark curls framed his face in a way that made him look angelic. But his tattoos and fashion sense gave him that bad boy edge that made girls go weak at the knees, you had witnessed it first hand, you were one of those girls. You saw the effect he had on women, you saw the way they desired him and for some reason you hadn't quite figured out yet, whether it was humility or ignorance, Sihtric either paid no heed to it, or simply didn't notice.

You on the other hand, your love life before Sihtric had been nothing short of tragic.

You had been cheated on, ghosted, broken up with and humiliated more times than you cared to count and it had made you somewhat jaded.

Sihtric had been there for you through each breakup, back when he was just a friend, he had gotten into fights with exes on your behalf and you couldn't understand why he hadn't run for the hills yet like all the other guys before. But here he was after months of sneaking around, falling asleep in your bed, wanting to be honest with his friends about your relationship.

It was a few weeks before Sihtric broached the topic of telling his friends again and you froze on the spot.

“Come on, it's the Christmas work party babe, everyone is bringing their significant others and I want to bring you as my date I want to show you off. I even got you this, thought maybe you might like to wear it. It might make you feel special, because you are to me.”

He pulled out the most stunning, sparkly dress you had ever seen and your eyes immediately began to water.

“Sihtric it is beautiful,” you gushed, running your fingers over the material.

“You are beautiful,” he mused and his eyes lit up, “Go ahead and try it on I’m dying to see it on you.”

As you spun around in the sparkly dress in the mirror, Sihtric burst into the room, eyes wide in pure joy as he placed his hands over his mouth, “Oh my god you look incredible!!” he mused coming to spin you around, he watched you almost with childlike wonder and then he took your hands in his “We are going to look so incredible together!” His excitement was absolutely contagious and that was how you found yourself agreeing to go to the Christmas Party with him and finally being honest with his friends about your relationship.

Walking up the steps to the swanky bar, you suddenly wanted to tuck tail and run, and Sihtric seemed to sense your anxiety.

He gripped your face in his hands and stroked your cheeks lovingly, “Hey, don’t be nervous, it’s my friends and they love me and they will be so happy for us.” he reassured, and you leaned up to kiss him, despite the nerves.

You were Sihtric’s friend, of course you had naturally hung out with his friends once or twice but you were far from close with them, and every time you had met them they had been nothing short of lovely, but you could not shake the fear that they would reject you once they knew that you were together.

That they would somehow see what you knew to be true, that you were not good enough for him.

Sihtric spotted his friends already gathered, drinks in hand and with a hand on your lower back he directed you towards them.

“Hey guys, you remember y/n right?” he asked and without warning Finan surged forward and pulled you into a bear hug, “Of course we remember,” he teased spinning you around “Ya haven’t stopped talking about her since the day you met her.”

You were still giggling as he placed you down, and Gisela stepped forward to pull you into a gentler hug, “We have always known he had a thing for you,” she said softly, “He never stops talking about you.”

“He is smitten,” Uhtred chimed in, shaking your hand kindly when Gisela stepped back.

Osferth, always the more reserved, just smiled shyly your way.

“I am smitten,” Sihtric beamed, coming to slink his arm around your waist again “And now I can finally tell the whole world about it.”

You felt your cheeks go red and the anxiety began to stir in your stomach again.

Suddenly Sihtric’s hands felt too heavy on your waist and you began to feel too warm.

“I’m just going to pop to the bathroom,” you announced jittery, and dipped out from under his arm and made your way to the nearest restroom in a hurry.

You rushed towards the sink, splashing cold water on your wrists to try and cool yourself down, forcing yourself to take some deep breaths.

Sihtric was deep in conversation laughing with Finan about something stupid when Osferth began scanning the crowd looking for you.

“Is everything okay with y/n?” he whispered into Sihtric’s ear and then he too was scanning the crowd for your face.

He bumped into you just as you were exiting the bathroom and he looked at you worriedly.

“I just…I just needed a breather,” you lied, patting your sweaty hands on your dress.

“A breather? Y/n we just got here,” he was trying not to sound annoyed but you could hear it in his voice.

“I know- I know, I’m fine now let’s get back to your friends.”

The drinks were flowing and you really did try to have fun, but the truth was you just felt so uncomfortable. Every time you saw a woman look Sihtric’s way your heart fell a little, even though he never once placed his eyes on any other woman except you and he always found some way to keep his hands on you.

You made small talk with Gisela and found yourself in a debate with Finan about football, both of you talking animatedly over each other until he jokingly put you in a headlock because he could not admit defeat, your squeals of laughter caught Sihtric’s attention and he demanded that Finan let you go, you took that opportunity to dig him into the ribs and he was left momentarily breathless and dropped you immediately.

As he was bent over trying to catch his breath he pointed a finger straight into your chest “I really like this one Sihtric. You better not fuck up or I’ll swoop her off you.”

You laughed and Sihtric laughed too but there was a hint of jealousy behind his laughter.

You finally felt yourself relaxing when Sihtric’s boss Alfred made his way over to your table with his wife. From Sihtric’s stories you knew she was meant to be a piece of work, so you tried to make yourself as small as possible in her presence but she still singled you out anyway.

“You are quite different than the last one he was with aren’t you?” she sniped, and you felt your cheeks tinge red.

“She worked on Fleet Street right, in Financing?”

“I believe so,” you answered shyly.

“And what exactly is it that you do?” she shot.

“I’m a freelance photographer,” you answered shyly “And I take shifts in my local pub to make up the difference.”

She scoffed a laugh and regarded you from the corner of her eye “So not bringing much in terms of value to the relationship really if you’re not able to make ends meet. I suppose you will be relying on Sihtric’s money too then?”

Your nostrils flared in anger, you wanted to snap at this bitch but Sihtric’s honey laugh pulled your attention to where he was sitting and you felt your anger dissipate.

She had only spoken aloud what you had known to be true from day one, you were not good enough for that beautiful force of a man, he laughed again and you couldn’t help the sad smile that spread out across your face, as you excused yourself out onto the balcony for some air, grabbing a free flute of champagne as you passed.

Sihtric was once again frustrated to find that he could not find your face in the crowd, he called your name, pushing through bodies on the way to the bar and he was still coming up short.

He finally spotted you through the glass doors out to the balcony, leaning against the railing, staring absentmindedly up at the skyscrapers across the London skyline.

“Y/n, what are you doing out here?” he snapped but he didn’t mean to, “I feel like I’ve spent all night looking for you and you’re nowhere to be seen. This was supposed to be fun, our first night out together officially as a couple and I feel like you’ve been avoiding me all night.”

You stiffened, and took a deep breath but your hands were shaking and you refused to face him.

“I’m sorry Sihtric,” you whispered, voice small, and he instantly regretted sounding so harsh.

“Talk to me. What’s going on?” he hushed, reaching out for you, alarmed at the tears in your eyes when you finally turned to face him, “What’s wrong babygirl?” he soothed, taking your hands in his.

“Sihtric,” you cried. “I don’t think this is a good idea anymore. Us. We- we’re just not suited, you deserve so much better than me and what I can give you.”

Hurt flashed across his face and he reached out to cup your face “Hey, where is this coming from?” he shook you a little and you just retreated further into yourself and doubled down.

“It’s for the best,” you continued, still refusing to meet his eye.

“Don’t do this here?” he cried “Please, let’s go home and talk about it. Please?” he begged.

“Please baby,” he begged again after you didn't relent, placing his forehead against yours.

“Sihtric, no,” you sniffed, untangling yourself from his grip and pushing him away to create some space.

“This whole night I have been trying to be perfect for you, trying to make myself someone that your friends would deem worthy of you, and I’m failing because the truth is- The truth is and I’ve known it all along is that I don’t deserve you. Your friends can see that. Your boss’s wife can see that, I don’t know why you can’t.”

“What are you talking about, not good enough for me?” he looked exasperated, and tried to reach for you again but you shrugged him off.

“You forget that I’ve been here for it all. All your exes that could have been models. All the successful girls who had nice apartments and were good for you, and I can’t compare an inch Sihtric, it’s why you kept me as a friend for so long, that’s the truth. And you just don’t want to admit that so I’m doing it for us both.”

Sihtric took an involuntary step backwards and his back collided with the railing behind, he ran a hand messily through his hair and you both stood in silence for a moment.

“Do you love me?” he finally broke the silence, leaning his whole weight on the railing behind him, your eyes snapped up to examine him and his mismatched eyes were already boring into yours “Do. You. Love. Me?” he enunciated each word, and you nodded, tears slipping down your cheeks because you couldn't lie to him.

“Yes, I love you but it doesn’t change anything, I can’t change myself” you cried.

“I don’t want you to change a thing,” he pleaded, voice raised “I fucking love you. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever known, inside and out. You are the reason those other girls are my exes, how could I ever fully commit to them when I was already in love with you! And now what you’re telling me that you think you are not good enough for me? Well you don’t get to decide that for me. You don’t get to tell me that I can’t love you, because I do! There is no one else on this earth for me but you,” he was angry and his chest was rising and falling rapidly as he tried to control his temper.

You looked at him, his face stern but hurt at the same time.

“I just feel like I am letting you down all the time. Like my career, my life, my looks are not enough to earn my place by your side. I was so afraid that once we went public, someone else would make you realise that and you would leave me. I just thought if I ended things first it would hurt us both less,” you finally admitted.

“That’s why you put off telling my friends?” he asked softly “I thought you were ashamed of me, but it was the other way around this entire time?”

“Sometimes, I feel like the ugliest person on the planet,” you confessed, now it was truly time to start being honest with Sihtric “There are some days I can barely stand to look in the mirror and I can’t understand why someone as beautiful as you would even want to look at someone like me, let alone be with me.”

Sihtric sprung forward cupping your face in his hands and forcing your eyes up to meet his, “It’s crushing my heart to hear you talk about yourself like that. From the moment I met you I have thought you were the most beautiful woman on this earth. Earlier you made a jab about me leaving you in the friendzone and that was partly true, not by your reasoning but because I was so afraid to be rejected by you I chickened out of pursuing you for years. Y/n if you could only see yourself through my eyes you would see what a stunning, kind hearted, creative and strong person is looking back at me right now. But if you can’t believe that for yourself can you at least give me the chance to try and make you see?”

You nodded in his hands and he leaned in to kiss you.

“I’m glad you were honest with me in the end about what has been going on in that beautiful brain of yours, but please don’t ever talk about leaving me again, I couldn’t bear it.”

You leaned up onto your tiptoes to kiss him again, when the balcony door opened and a loud Irish man stumbled out.

“Everyone thought ye were gone!” he shouted “I said ye were fucking in the bathroom, but ye hardly did it out here for all to see did ye?”

“And you missed it all,” you teased “We literally just put our clothes back on,”

Sihtric laughed in your arms as Finan picked you up, “I’m doing shots with this one, are you coming?” he tossed you over his shoulder and your laughter made Sihtric sigh in relief, the tension of the last few minutes flowing out of every pore.

“Put her down Finan!” he shouted after the form of his retreating friend as you reached out to try and grab a hold of Sihtric's hand.

You stumbled into your apartment having done one too many shots with Finan and forcing Osferth to dance with you on the dancefloor, spinning him around so much he was nearly sick.

“I think I found my new best friend,” Gisela shouted into Sihtric’s ear over the loud music, and he gave her a squeeze in joy.

“She was so worried you guys wouldn’t like her,” he told her honestly.

“It’s not always so easy to go from friends to lovers,” she reasoned. “It’s a different dynamic. Be patient with her. You knew you had feelings for her all this time, but she didn’t.”

“Okay let’s get you to bed,” Sihtric laughed when you started hiccuping, and he picked you up bridal style carrying you to bed, and placing you gently down.

He went to fetch paracetamol and a glass of water, “Take these my darling, it will help with the hangover in the morning.”

“Good girl,” he mused when you swallowed down the glass of water, and you curled into him.

He brushed his fingers through your hair and placed a kiss to your forehead “I never want to hear you say that you don’t think you are good enough for me ever again,” he stated in a way that told you not to argue.

“You are the best thing that ever happened to me and I will never let anyone say anything bad about you again, including you!”

You chuckled at that and he smiled too, “Tell that to the voice in my head,” you slurred and he laughed out loud “Oh I plan to, every day for the rest of our lives!”

Tagging:

@canyonmoon-2 @sihtricfedaraaahvicius @whitedarkmoonflower @thenameswinter99 @foxyanon

@acdassenza @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @gemini-mama

@troyottonick @alexagirlie

a-beaverhausen nebulamorada izzydlb knight-of-flowerss

justcuriousandbored

#sihtric x reader #sihtric kjartansson x reader #sihtric kjartansson #sihtric fic #sihtric smut #the last kingdom fic #volklanawrites

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painfulstretch · 8 months ago

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had this daydream recently about living in a relatively remote area with few houses next to mine, in front of a huge park. not too long ago, i got a new neighbor - a pretty woman, in her late twenties maybe early thirties, sporting a big, round belly. even massively pregnant, she still seems to care about her body. every day at precisely 4:30pm, i can see her leave the house to go on a walk, all the way around the park, and without fail return at 5:15pm. i make it a habit to spy on her from my window.

today though, she's late. she came out of her house with a few minutes delay, her waddle more pronounced than ever, one hand pressed against her back and the other supporting her belly - even all the way from my window, i could tell how low it is.

an hour passes and she's not back yet. i'm starting to think about going to look for her when i see her stumble along the path, slightly bend over. both her hands are now clutching her round middle, and her face is scrunched up in effort and pain. i raise an eyebrow, watching her make her slow way to her house. she's almost directly in front of my home when she suddenly drops to the ground with a scream that i can hear even through the closed window and distance between us. i realise this isn’t just normal late term pregnancy pains or braxton hicks contractions but actual labor. she's in labor, in front of my house, with no one else around. i know the rest of the few neighbours we have is on vacation. it's just her and me. i feel the heat between my thighs start to build as i jump into action.

i run outside and up to her. as i come closer, i see that her pants are drenched with amniotic fluid. her fingers dig into her skin. sweat glistens on her forehead and she's panting frantically before breaking into a loud guttoral groan. the contraction consumes her for what seems like eternity, making her tremble all over. when it subsides, she struggles and fails to get up. she lets out a sob.

"do you need help?" i ask, trying to make my voice sound as innocent as possible.

her eyes open and her head snaps in my direction. for a split moment, embarrassment fills her features, humiliation of being found like this, but then it's replaced by relief. she thinks help is here. she tells me yes, yes she does, and, thank god i'm here. i offer to take her inside, so she can make herself comfortable until an ambulance arrives. she gratefully nods.

i help her up and lead her to my open front door. when her eyes squeeze shut to ride out another contraction, i can't help but smirk to myself. she has no idea what she's agreed to. there won't be comfort and there will definitely not be an ambulance. why would i give up this golden opportunity of enjoying myself for the next several hours? hell, maybe the next few days. that baby won't come out any time soon

#labor pain #birth kink #giving birth #painful birth

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jgys-hat · 3 months ago

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Now I've rewatched The Untamed having now read MDZS, here are some thoughts (in no particular order):

I found myself liking Jin Zixuan a lot more this time around - the first time I watched I found him kind of boring, but this time I really appreciated him for seemingly trying to be kind and fair despite being posh and privileged. I also found his awkwardness endearing... Oh, and Wei Wuxian is a total dick to him on several occasions, to be honest.

I also liked Su She a lot more this time.

I liked Wangxian a more in CQL than in the novel. I think this is because in the novel, WWX can't read LWJ very well, so sometimes I felt that novel!LWJ came off as somewhat of a flat character, whereas in the show the acting gives a better sense of what he might be thinking and feeling at any given moment.

The flashback episode scenes at Cloud Recesses where they're all young, alive and more or less happy are Painful to watch knowing what's coming next...

I really intensely dislike CQL's inclusion of the second flautist plot point. I think the story is more interesting and tragic if WWX really did just overextend himself and lose control.

On a similar note, I preferred that in the novel the curse put on Jin Zixuan was nothing to do with WWX at all - I think something that's got nothing to do with him being pinned on him anyway adds an extra level of tragedy to the story and adds to the themes the story is trying to put across.

I much preferred the greater level of moral ambiguity that the novel had - it made me really sad that WWX does some really awful things but eventually gets to live happily ever after having had a chance to redeem himself, whereas JGY never gets that chance and just dies horribly :(((

I really enjoyed the extra development that CQL gave to the female supporting characters! I feel like CQL gives a much better sense of how Wen Qing is as a person than the novel does.

JIN GUANGYAO THE CHARACTER EVER... Everything I could possibly say about him has already been said by people who are much smarter and better at writing than me, but I love his character so much... He does do some pretty awful things, BUT he gets put in a lot of impossible situations where he would have been absolutely pilloried no matter what he did, poor guy. "JGY did some awful things" and "JGY was genuinely badly treated by a lot of people" are statements that can and should coexist.

The other thing that I find really sad is that JGY meets his end because of the person he (at least in the novel) killed in self-defence and was genuinely afraid of, and not because of anything actually evil he did, like having his dad's pet serial killer murder twenty women... It's really not justice at all, but I think that's likely the point the story is trying to make.

Listen, I'm just so sad about A-Yao... Maybe people should have been nice to him and he wouldn't have committed crimes :)))

He lived so much of his life in fear of one kind or another and then dies humiliated :))) I'm fine this is fine :)))

I am continually astonished that the censors decided "no zombies for you" but something as gross and horrible as the way Jin Guangshan was bumped off is A-OK.

I think that given how different the structure of the drama is from that of the novel, introducing the Yi City trio earlier on was an understandable and sensible change to make.

I think I may need to scream forever about Nie Huaisang's character arc... The fact that by using LXC to kill JGY he's become as manipulative as the person he hated, and has also forced Jin Ling into becoming sect leader at a very young age, just like NHS himself was by the death of his brother, makes me Feel Things...

...As does the fact that his face as he leaves the Guanyin Temple in CQL is not the face of a happy man - it comes across to me as though he's realised that getting revenge hasn't really given him any sense of satisfaction at all. He must know that his peers are unlikely to really trust him again. I love how in his final scene he's dropped the buffoonish act totally, because now his plan has come to fruition he can outwardly be the person he has been inside for a very long time.

NHS is clearly just as capable of Rage as his brother once was, he just expresses it very differently.

Also, the fact that by the end of the story NHS is likely older than his brother ever got to be :)))

I wish CQL had had some way of working in the scene from the novel where NMJ had NHS' things burned - I think it was nice on getting some background on the brothers and on NHS' relationship with JGY.

JGY and NHS were clearly close once, so watching this happen to their relationship is so interesting to me... The betrayal on both sides is just *chef's kiss*... I actually think they're both quite similar in a lot of ways, but that's probably a topic for a separate post!!!

They are both such cool and interesting characters and I love them both!!

#this was meant to be a post about what I thought MDZS did better than CQL and vice versa #but it's just devolved into me screaming about JGY and NHS for way way too long...#CQL #The Untamed #MDZS #Splash witters

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alex-turners-world · 4 months ago

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Alex looks like a ghost of who he once was, it's so sad to see him looking so drained of life especially in his eyes. After seeing Taylor's live it seems apparent now that they had issues brewing in their relationship for awhile before splitting, although there genuinely did seem to be love for one another. I think about that interview with the journalist who asked Alex what he thought of Taylor's fights with the fans; I wonder if he was aware of it and the extent. I could imagine that being confronted with it was humiliating for him and possibly feeling a sense of betrayal, particularly if he wasn't aware. Now, imagine meeting someone like Pauline where you 'think' you've met someone with common interests and perhaps made a genuine connection with only to discover the person you thought you met isn't 'real'. Personally, I think Alex feels remorseful about the cheating, I don't think it was something he was proud of as evidenced in his lyrics and behaviour for example shaving his hair off time period. Whilst Alex certainly has his flaws and made some questionable choices I still think there is a decent and kind person underneath. In regards to Alex's present relationship you could say he made his bed...However, I personally think he's dealing with a slightly deranged individual. I mean none of us know the depths Pauline went to get into his circle in order for their first meeting to have happened but what we do know about her is that she was highly obsessive about him and some of his previous relationships most noticeably Alexa. She's displayed stalker-ish behaviour and as we've all witnessed 'cosplaying' of previous girlfriends again, Alexa evidently being the favourite. We've seen how over time she has made multiple attempts to recreate a new 'identity', being caught out in her lies and manipulation of the truth via her own media. Even before the affair came to the fans attention she was already hinting and teasing about her hooks up with Alex infact, I think it was through her social media activity that fans where able to join the dots to the cheating as well as through Taylors. Pauline has displayed since the beginning a complete lack of respect and remorse towards Taylor even going so far to cosplay her too!! At some point Alex must've seen the 'real' Pauline, perhaps earlier than later but what could he do?! Such a big mess was made. Maybe he wanted to make the best out of a bad situation, try give the mistress and him a real go so it wasn't all for nothing. Clearly, this has led to the 'situationship' we know today. Alex has the upper hand in more ways than one; He makes decisions - she follows, He has the money - she doesn't, What he says/gives goes - she settles for what she can get. Anything to please him enough that she can keep him and this lifestyle from slipping through her fingers. Alex is being used. So is Pauline but for different reasons. Neither are happy, it's plain to see but still Pauline wants it all. I'm of the opinion that getting out of this 'situationship' is not so black and white. I have at times thought to myself, perhaps Alex thinks he deserves this; That it could be a way of self sabotaging. It can be debated that Alex doesn't think highly of himself and is deeply insecure (The Bourne Identity) Also, I think Paulines behaviour could be unpredictable and potentially damaging to Alex's reputation. I could imagine she has not seen or received the best of him as a person at times. It wouldn't surprise me if she's quite the manipulator, we already know she's a liar! I do hope if it is something that Alex wants for himself that they will be able to part ways with minimal chaos as possible (unlikely). A separation for them at least seems imminent and even Pauline can't disguise that as hard as she tries. Just my two cents anyways, apologies for rambling on! X

Very well said! I must say it's all very sad

#alex turner #louise verneuil #the situationship whatevership #anon ask

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strlingsav · 1 year ago

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Drive: Seven

– Simon "Ghost" Riley x F!Reader

Explicit content under the cut. Read at your own risk.

Johnny called you out of the blue, wanting to meet up following your leave. Up to that point, you weren't sure how Johnny felt about you- you had an inkling he'd known all along about your secret affair with Simon, though not to what extent. The phone call didn't allow for much insight, either, a quick conversation that did nothing to settle your nerves. Surely, he'd be curious; if not pissed off.

You were a bit hesitant to blindly agree to meeting him, and when he mentioned Kyle, your blood ran cold wondering if Simon or John were sitting with them.

You finally agreed, after reassurance that neither men were there. He purposely emphasized that Simon was on base for the evening and had declined his invite. The thought made you cringe- you worried you'd isolated him from his friends, his teammates, and it was your fault he was hiding away and not out drinking.

You managed to peel yourself from the confines of your bed; pulling on causal clothes, running your fingers through your hair and washing your face. Your mental health had certainly suffered the last few months; your motivation to take care of yourself had been hindered by self-deprecating thoughts.

You managed to apply a bit of makeup and pull your hair into a suitable condition. Though it wasn't your usual standard, Johnny and Kyle wouldn't notice a difference- and you didn't care.

The two men were at opposite sides of the table when you arrived, Johnny's arm resting on the seat while he nodded along to something Kyle was saying. They greeted you, quick hugs and hellos offered before you sat down beside Kyle.

"You been alright?" Johnny asked, his hand wrapped around his beer.

You could tell he practically spat the question out, like it was trapped in his throat, waiting to burst out. His face showed no expression- not empathy or anger, and you knew you needed to proceed with a cautious response.

The noise of the bar drowned out any worries you had of awkward silences or pauses while you tried to come up with a story better than the truth.

"Yeah," You nodded, cracking a small smile. "Aside from being discharged and publicly humiliated."

"Donnae think too hard on it. Nobody blames you- shoulda been Ghost gettin' tossed; Price kisses his fuckin' arse."

"It's not his fault," You shook your head. "I also should've known better."

"He was your superior officer," Kyle added. "It was his responsibility." You winced at the word 'was'- another reminder of the loss you'd suffered.

"But we both wanted this- it," You corrected yourself. It was silent for a few moments, before you spoke up again. "Let's just move on," You smiled awkwardly.

"Aye," Johnny nodded. "You heard from him?"

"Thought we were moving on?" You raised a brow.

"Too good not to share details," Johnny grinned.

"I did, and then I ended it- I guess."

"Ended it?" Johnny asked. "Ghost's been chattin' my fuckin' ear off about you. You sure that's what you want?"

"You're not my therapist, Johnny," You rolled your eyes, a grin on your lips.

"No- but the lad's desperate for you, tell you that much."

"It's not feasible," You shrugged. "Not when we don't work together. I can't put that on him."

"Anythin's possible," Kyle entered. "Even if it's just to shut him up," He laughed, watching Johnny.

"I can't," You interjected. "I got ahead of myself with the feelings part- I know that. I just think I felt more for him than I thought I did."

"No shame in it," Johnny shook his head. "If it makes you feel any better, I'd never seen that big bastard happier. Y'should tell him."

You tilted your head, sighing softly. "It doesn't- and I won't, but thanks." You grinned.

"So what now?" Kyle asked, leaning in.

"Nothing. Find a job, settle down. Like a normal person."

"We'll miss havin' you around, that's for sure," Johnny nodded.

"Thanks, Johnny."

"Normal people tell other people how they're feeling," Kyle eyed you down, an eyebrow raised while he subtly scolded you. "Instead of avoiding it."

"I'm not normal just yet, Kyle. Can't you just say you'll miss me?"

"I'll miss you," He teased.

You sighed at his response. Their advice was well-intended, but a voice in your head still warned against being honest with Simon. You worried it would create expectations, standards that he couldn't uphold from across the world.

If he didn't reciprocate your feelings, the humiliation of being discharged would only be accompanied by rejection from the very reason you were let go to begin with. It made your stomach churn to imagine telling Simon- the lingering stare he'd give, the apologies and polite goodbyes. It would sting far worse than just leaving it as it was.

You must've been staring off into the distance, hardly touching your drink as Johnny and Kyle dragged you back onto shore. They offered to play a round of pool with you- take your mind off everything, but you wanted to sit and stew.

You took up a seat at the bar while they played, fingers playing with the plastic toothpick you snagged. You felt like shit. Not just because you'd lost your job, but because you'd lost Simon. You were sure he'd take you back in a heartbeat, but it didn't mean anything. Your feelings were as pointless as they'd always been. You felt absolutely ridiculous for knowing that from the very beginning, but proceeding anyway.

You wanted to be mean. You wanted to keep being unavailable and distant, until he lost interest and left you alone. It was hard- hard not to call him, hear his voice. So you promised yourself to be mean, because if you were to see him, you'd crumble, fall into the abyss where he'd been waiting for you.

Your attention was grabbed by a man sliding in next to you, getting a bit too close for comfort and leaning into your personal space. You looked up to meet his gaze, finding an unfamiliar face beside you.

Ordinarily, you'd have been flattered by his bold actions, but your mind only had enough space for one man at the moment- Simon.

"You drinking alone?" He asked, leaning over the bar.

Your expression remained flat as you nodded. "Yeah, I guess."

"Want another one?" He nodded toward the drink in your hand.

You lifted your head again, uninterested in anything but the woodgrain of the bar.

"I'm okay," You smiled politely.

"C'mon," He grinned. "I'm a stranger offering to lend an ear- nothing more."

Your patience had already begun to wear thin, especially as he kept that same grin across his face. Before you could say another word, someone else did for you.

"Fuck off, yeah mate?" Simon's voice interjected from behind you, causing your eyes to widen.

"That's- I'm sorry," You said, offering an apology to the man.

Your jaw clenched as you spun to face Simon, watching the stranger you were politely chatting with turn away with widened eyes. Your eyes met Simon's, your brows furrowing with frustration.

"That was rude," You said. "What are you doing here?"

"Weren't gonna tell me you were here?" Simon asked, his eyes surveilling the room before he leaned closer and looked at you.

"I don't report to you anymore," You said back, watching him grimace.

"Quit the fuckin' attitude," He growled. "Didn't think I'd find out you were meetin' with Johnny and Kyle?"

"I was sure you would," You shrugged. "Just didn't realize I needed permission to be here."

He leaned down and ordered a strict, 'come with me' while he herded you out the front door. His hand gripped your arm, gently guiding you forward so he could talk with you in peace and quiet.

It was damp outside, a bit of a chill while progressing into Spring. Your breath in the air appeared before you, and Simon's hand on your arm offered a comforting warmth.

He lead you to his truck, opening the door as he gestured for you to get in.

"Simon-"

"Get in the fuckin' truck."

You sighed, stepping in to sit in the warmth of his vehicle, while he rounded the front of his truck to get in the driver's seat. He put it in drive, starting toward your apartment without allowing you to get a word in.

"What's goin' on?" He asked, hand clinging to the wheel as you leaned back against the seat. "Y'can't keep avoidin' me. You just fuck me and leave?"

Your eyes dodged his, staring at the street ahead of you. You knew you'd break down- one drink in, and it had loosened you up just enough to get emotional and honest.

He huffed; drawing your name out in that low, raspy voice that tugged on your heartstrings and sent chills up your back. Your gaze met his pleading eyes, lifting your head to find the brown irises that made your knees weak.

"You didn't have to come," You said finally. "Did Johnny call you?"

"Doesn't matter who called me," Simon tilted his head. "Answer me," He said, briefly peering over at you.

"I don't know, Simon," You narrowed your eyes.

"Don't know why you're avoidin' me?"

"I don't know about anything," You laughed, exasperated and tired.

"Talk to me, sweetheart," He said, voice just above a whisper, soft and gentle- like he usually was with you.

"Don't do that," You shook your head, your eyes closing so you wouldn't have to see the look that could break you in seconds. "Don't be sweet and nice to me."

He chuckled, "Why's that?"

"I've been an asshole," You sighed, tears welling in your eyes.

"Just tell me what's goin' on, and we can fix it."

"There's no we, no us."

He quickly pulled over, finding a spot on a quiet gravel road that had trees hanging over it, and long grass in the ditch. His head turned as he gave all his attention to you.

"I beg to fuckin' differ. Don't care if you ain't answerin' my calls, you're mine, remember that?" His hand came to rest on your thigh.

"I can't-," You shook your head, squeezing your eyes shut as stray tears fell. "I can't, Simon. We can't do this."

"Why's that?"

You exhaled harshly, sniffling as a lump grew in your throat. You swallowed, finding his eyes in the darkness.

"Because I love you," You whispered. "And I can't do that while you're miles away. And I can't ask you stay." Your voice began to quiver, which was more irritating than bearing your feelings to him.

He was silent for a few moments, his eyes darting back and forth between yours. His chest was tight, your admission of your feelings made him feel warm, content.

"Y'don't have to ask," He shook his head. "'It'll always be you. I'll always love you," He said quietly. "Y'know that, right?"

Your breath caught in your chest, desperately holding onto your last shred of self-control, eyeing down his lips. Your eyes dried themselves with the help of his words, a yearning forming in your chest that begged to be satiated by him.

"I don't know-" You started, shaking your head.

"It's you," He repeated, craning his neck to meet your eye line. "It's you, love."

His voice was low, quiet and full of sincerity. It churned your stomach.

"I just want you to be sure," You nodded. "And I want you to be here. And I don't know if you can be either of those things- and I understand." Your voice wavered again, the lump in your throat returning.

"Fuckin' 'ell," He nearly grinned, letting out a short chuckle of disbelief. "I have to get you a ring to sort you out? 'M sure. Always was- am."

"Don't joke about shit like that," You sighed, looking away, attempting to fight off the vulnerability of your position, and keep him at an arm's length.

"Jokin'? It ain't far off, love. Just waitin' for the right time." His hand briefly touched your cheek.

"It doesn't change the distance," You reasoned, watching him shake his head.

"It's finished," He answered. "My work with 141- overseas- it's done. 'M here for good, sweetheart."

"Johnny didn't mention that?" You said, tilting your head.

"'Course he didn't. I asked him to let me tell you myself."

You gasped, "I knew he called you!"

He shrugged. "Johnny ain't what I was here to talk about."

"You're here? For good?" Your brows raised themselves as you interrogated him.

"Long as you'll have me."

A rush of relief, excitement flooded through you. All the walls you'd broken down to find the gooey centre of emotion within him- it was more than worth it. The fruition of a crush you'd had since the first time you saw him; it made your heart pound.

He was real, genuine, more than just the stoic lieutenant you pinned him as. And he loved you- wholly and without conditions, obviously and without shame- even when it threatened his career. It was the perfect ending to the most fucked-up fairytale you'd ever seen.

You pursed your lips, slotting yourself closer to his seat. "As long as you want to stay," You said- resolute.

"Have t'kill me to keep me away," He teased.

Your stomach flipped, a laugh exploding from you before he cut you off with a kiss, soft and apprehensive. You shivered against him, warm lips against yours awakening the nerves in your body.

Once your mind had caught up with your body, your hands grabbed at his shoulders. It made you sigh into his mouth, savouring the feeling you'd missed. You missed him, undoubtedly, and the thought of one day being more than what you were in '141' made your heart jump.

Your smile broke through the kiss, and his greedy hands were grabbing and pulling at your waist in an attempt to keep you close. You giggled while his hands worked their way down to your ass, squeezing harshly, pulling you onto his lap. You could feel his arousal through his jeans- his hard cock pressed against you.

"'Member the first time I had you like this," He whispered against your neck, his fingers working at your pants' button. "Naughty fuckin' girl you were. Still are," You could hear the grin on his face.

His hand slipped beneath your pants, running his fingers gently over your pussy. He let out a short exhale.

"Still get so fuckin' wet for me, don't you, sweetheart?"

His rhetorical question made goosebumps appear over your skin. You pulled yourself closer to his chest, ground your pussy over his hand. Your deep breaths fanned over his chest, your fingers digging into the tight T-shirt covering his skin. You wanted more- wanted to feel him again.

Your hands worked quickly to slide his shirt off, your palms running down the thick muscle of his chest, fingers tracing the divots and protrusions of his abdomen. He let out a quiet grunt, his cock twitching in his jeans at the feel of your soft hands on his body.

He grabbed your wrist, dragging your hand down to his groin, allowing you to grab a handful of his crotch- he moaned quietly when your gentle hand caressed his cock, short huffs from his nose as his fingers worked their way inside you.

"Take 'em off," He ordered, fiddling with your waistband with his other hand.

He helped you to sit forward while you slid your pants down your hips, removing your feet from the confines of your jeans before settling back on his lap.

His calloused hands slid up and down your thighs, rounding your full hips. His fingers found the scar, the patched-up hole in your leg; you shivered as he looked down at it.

"First time I've felt it," He said, out of the blue. "Hurt at all?"

You shook your head, "No." Your cheeks flushed, overwhelmed by everything that had come together in the last few moments but especially as he dusted his fingers across your scar.

He squeezed your flesh reassuringly, leaning up to press a soft kiss against your lips. Your hands, in turn, moved quickly to unzip his pants, gently taking his cock in your hand as you knelt up on the seat.

He helped to guide his cock to the warmth of your pussy, the soft, wet flesh beckoning him closer until he sunk in, and you began to relax, sliding down his cock. Your pussy swallowed him whole, his pulsating cock twitching within your welcoming walls- his head fell back, and your hands landed on his shoulders.

"Shit, baby," You exhaled, your hips stationary while you acclimated yourself to his size again.

"Just as fuckin' heavenly," He whispered, strong hands kneading the flesh of your ass and hips. "Though now s'all mine," He grinned, smug and assured.

Your hips rolled forward, the first thrust easing any discomfort, and making you flinch when your clit rubbed against the short curls at the base of his cock. You exhaled again, a quiet shudder as he filled you entirely, so deliciously hot and hard inside you.

Your hands met behind his head, pulling yourself closer as you found your stride, taking his cock deeper inside you while grinding your clit against him.

"That's right, love," He said approvingly, his hands gripping your hips, helping you forward. "Ride it- y'know how I like it, don't you?" He cooed, greedy fingers squeezing your waist and ass in his hands.

"Keep talking," You whispered against his cheek. "I missed your voice," You said.

"That right?" He practically hummed, though a bit choked as you rode his cock. "Think you missed more than that- greedy fuckin' girl."

His hand left a slap against your ass, making you hiss softly.

"Simon-" You warned. "No teasing, been too long," You groaned.

"You wanna cum, sweetheart?" He asked, his voice dripping with mockery.

You nodded, your breaths heavier as you chased your orgasm, his voice leaking into your abdomen and pushing you forward with every single word. Your hands clawed at his shoulders, your breasts flush with his chest.

"Make me cum," You sighed.

He put two fingers in his mouth, before reaching your clit and stroking softly in a circular motion. Your back arched into his touch, practically bouncing yourself up and down his cock.

"Yes- yesyesyes," You gasped.

He let out a short, strangled grunt at feeling your pussy flutter around his cock.

"Fuckin' Christ, love," He spat, his fingers digging into your waist as he helped you ride him.

Your breath caught in your chest, warmth flooding your abdomen as you clenched your jaw, your pussy contracting around him. Your vision blurred for a moment, squeezing your eyes shut while your climax rushed over you within a matter of moments.

Stars obstructed your view of him while you blinked softly, and he wrapped a gentle hand around your throat. You quickly realized he'd released inside you already- overly sensitive and cringing each time you moved forward.

"Sorry," You gasped, relaxing into his chest, his cock still erect inside you.

"S'alright, sweetheart." He pulled your forward to kiss you, soft lips against yours.

He helped you over to the passenger seat, offering his T-shirt to help clean yourself up. Once settled back in your jeans, and sliding the seatbelt over you, you turned to him with a soft smile.

"Let's go home."

#cod mw2 #simon riley #ghost x reader #cod mwii #mwii #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost smut #simon riley smut #strlingsavwrites

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