#but she is peak Pacific Bay character

[asharkapologist]

Fandom Opinion Chart + Explanations Under the Cut

I love Giulietta, it's as simple as that,,, her character growth from her selfish attitude towards her sister before the game, to trying to make her way into high society, to returning to her roots but finding love in a man supposed to be her enemy, to trying to stop the gang war that takes almost everything from her, to later leading a resistance against a dictator is incredible to watch. She's the real main character of Crimson Banks and Capital Peak idc. She endures so so much heartache, I cried both times I played In Love and War, that case genuinely makes me feel ill, and yet she manages to get back up because she's just that strong. I hope she was happy after the game ended.

On the other hand, I despise Jack. He makes several sexist comments throughout the game (I've half a mind to compile them to prove my point), and I have no idea how someone as immature and annoying as him managed to get a job in Interpol. His relationship drama with Asal is insufferable to sit through, and the way he constantly whines about her in South America and North America months after they broke up made me want to throw my phone, especially with the awful way he treats her after she's stabbed and almost died. And then in Travel in Time, he's just boring.

I initially didn't like Samson at first because he killed one of my favorite characters for a stupid reason (accompanied by a confusing message--how was Malcolm supposed to know Archie's death was targeted towards him?) but now I love him because his plan was so dumb and he's fun to meme on and he's REALLY hot.

Nebet is like my favorite main antagonist and it's so sad that she's gone for like two whole districts because even though I saw it coming, her betrayal HURT. Like 99% of s6's writing effort went into her, and she would have been a good antagonist even if she hadn't returned after killing her father, but the fact that she comes back and kills her younger self because she changed in exile makes her such an interesting character. I want to know so much about her, her thoughts while she was working with the team, and especially her epiphanies in exile, how she changed in exile and decided to turn against her parents and their goals. That's incredible fanfic material. She's also incredibly beautiful just LOOK AT HER.

Trevor Finn sucks. Fake af shark "expert" who probably just gave himself that title after watching Jaws but never bothered doing any research about sharks because he just spews misinformation and stereotypes about sharks that aren't true. For some reason, Pacific Bay really hated sharks. But other than that, there's not much else to mention about him, when with Jack I at least have stuff to complain about.

I realllly don't like Rozetta and do NOT think she was redeemed, even if Denise was a greater evil. I feel like people brush over the fact that she was KIDNAPPING AND TORTURING HOMELESS PEOPLE TO DEATH. She abducted who knows how many people and conducted horrific, torturous human experimentation on them that only one person (Zoe) survived, and nothing indicated she felt any remorse for those crimes, she only started fighting against Denise when Denise betrayed her and her friends. And even though Zoe escaped, Rozetta started the chain of events that led to Zoe's death. However, that being said, Rozetta is really, really pretty.

Archie is a millionaire and yet he dresses so drab. Lawson isn't as rich as Archie, and yet he dresses more fancy. Also Archie's collar looks weird and like his tie would be strangling him or something

I don't really talk about Penelope, but she (besides Nebet) is my favorite main character of s6! I relate to her a lot because we both like history and writing. I think we'd get along great talking to each other about story ideas, fangirling about fandoms, and talking about history.

Seamus x Giulietta is my favorite because Giulietta is my favorite character and I'm a sucker for tragic, star-crossed lovers. Got really emotionally attached to them even though I knew they wouldn't have a happy ending. Honorable mentions go to Arthur x Bernadine, Archie x Elisa, and Hope x Gwen.

Speaking of Hope x Gwen, they should have been canon instead of Gwen x Pierce. I hate this ship so much. Hope and Gwen had much more chemistry, and the FIRST DISTRICT in s7 proved why Gwen and Pierce wouldn't work out, and then out of nowhere Pierce shows up??? And gets back with Gwen randomly??? Huh??? And they have a kid??? Why. Hope was RIGHT THERE if you wanted someone to comfort Gwen after her mother's death and the complicated relationship she had with her.

I also don't talk about her as much as I should, but I love Priya! I love her character arc, her relationship with Zander is very sweet and well built up throughout the season, and her being a werewolf made her character arc all the more interesting. She's also just a very genuinely kind person, and I feel like she would have been a really good chemistry tutor when I was struggling with it in school lol

Given how annoyed I get with classmates and coworkers who are poor communicators, I would despise being around someone like Frank who's always late, drinking whenever he can, and who treats his female boss incredibly disrespectfully. Plus he eventually becomes a corrupt police officer and yeah, not a fan of those. Wouldn't want to be around one irl. He certainly needs professional help, but I am not the one to give it.

[astra-galaxie]

Hello Astra!!!

In the original Criminal Case universe, what would be that one detail that you would change in each season??

Hey Sereno! It's nice to see you on Tumblr! I have a feeling this won't be the only ask I receive from you, and I look forward to any future ones you might send!

As for your question, ignoring the many changes I have already made in my series for seasons 1-4, here is one thing I would change in each season of Criminal Case!

Season 1 - Grimsborough

I usually give season 1 a pass on most things since it's the first game in the series, and therefore, it's expected that it will not be the best compared to its successors. That being said, something I would change about it is its representation of minorities. I know it can be argued that Grimsborough is a product of its time, and many of its stereotypes show that. Still, I think if Grimsborough were ever to be remade/remastered in the present, its storyline and characters should be updated for better representation. We saw that in later games, the representation was more accurate, like certain ethnicities, so it would be nice for season 1 to have an update to better represent the characters seen in it.

Season 2 - Pacific Bay

I would have liked the districts to have been better connected and for the season to have had a plot that spanned across it to help with that. Each district felt isolated and disconnected from the others to the point where I wondered, “How do such drastically different districts coexist next to each other?” I mean, seriously, you have White Peakes, a snow-covered, mountainous district next to a literal DESERT! While I enjoy some of the plots of the districts, overall, I wish the season could have been better connected and had more foreshadowing of the ending.

Season 3 - Save The World

Besides having someone else (cough Nathan cough) be the coroner instead of Grace and Michelle surviving the season, another change that could be made to STW would be a better foreshadowing of there being a mole on the Bureau. I’m not saying it had to be obvious or stated earlier than its reveal in the Africa Region, but it would have made things more interesting had they been foreshadowed earlier in the season. Likewise, there could have been references to cases from past regions to show how the mole was betraying the team from the beginning instead of just a few things in the cases leading up to In Plain Sight.

Season 4 - Mysteries of The Past

While there are a few little things throughout the season that I would like to change, such as making CelineXGreta canon, the Flying Squad doing a better job at protecting Vinnie, and Giulietta and Seamus getting a happily ever after, one change I would make in S4 would be for Leopold Rochester to live. He was one of the best Rochesters and didn’t deserve to die! I would have loved to see him and Lady Highmore get married and he eventually become the mayor’s husband. This man would have been such a supportive husband and would have done everything he could to help The Resistance like Lady Highmore did! We were robbed of what would have been a beautiful love story���

Season 5 - The Conspiracy

One idea I had for The Conspiracy was instead of Grace joining the Bureau, the way she returned as a teammate again was to replace Rupert following his death in season 5. Not that I don't think Amir was capable of taking over Rupert’s position but going from Lab Assistant to Lab Chief seemed like a significant jump in positions. An alternative could have been for Grace to return to Grimsborough after accepting the job offer from Donna to become Lab Chief, as Grace would undoubtedly have the knowledge and experience for the job. It would have also kept the theme of having two forensic experts that The Conspiracy had going for the rest of the season.

Season 6 - Travel In Time

I would have liked a district set in the MotP era. I’m not saying I wish we lost any of the canon districts, but I think it would have been interesting to visit Concordia and meet the Flying Squad. Plus, it would have helped connect that season to the others beyond references in following seasons since, unlike the other seasons, we can't meet any of the characters outside of season 4. (Excluding Maggie O’Malley, but I don't count her since she was a baby and never mentioned Concordia in S2.)

Again, I do not wish for any canon districts not to exist, but if I had to pick one to replace the MotP one with, it would be The 60s. I feel like it would be the easiest to replace since, to me, it's not as connected to the plot as the other districts after learning about the sabotage and alternate future. I don’t know when exactly during MotP it would take place (before, during, or after the canon timeline), but regardless, I would have LOVED to have visited Concordia during Travel In Time!

Season 7 - Supernatural Investigations

My biggest issue with season 7 is how rushed the final district feels, especially the last case. I already complained about how I hate how PS made Mathison a demon with ZERO foreshadowing and ruined his character with the “twist.” I have also said he will not be a demon in my story, so I’m excluding that plot point from my answer. I would want the ending to flow better and to resolve things in a way that made more sense instead of just, “We saved the world. Everyone’s mistakes are forgiven! :D” (If you know what I’m referencing, I need not say anymore.)

(I’d also love for Arthur not to be the final victim and for him to live to see the Demon Queen’s defeat, but I’m not sure if even I could rewrite the case that much… But that doesn't mean I might not try to!)

Season 8 - City of Romance

Besides rewriting nearly the entire season? It might be easier for me to pick a detail I WOULDN’T change since there are so many things I would change that it's going to take me a minute to pick one…

Okay, minutes up!

One detail (among many) I would change in S8 is that past characters (excluding Jones) didn’t recognize you. I have a solution for this same issue in S7, but for this season, I have a few ideas I’m still considering… Likewise, I would have liked this season to have more references to past seasons and their cases. It also should have had more cameos from past teammates and almost been like a reunion season to help say goodbye to the game.

… Okay, maybe I listed a few details I would change this season, but you can't blame me! There’s a lot that can be changed in S8 to make it better, so I think I’m allowed to make an exception!

I always enjoy seeing what changes people would like to/do make to Criminal Case through stories, artwork, or other content. I have plenty of things planned for my series, and some of the changes I listed will happen along with others, so I look forward to what the future holds!

Thanks for the ask!

[trulyatessfan]

do you have a favorite season? and have you made any OCs for it?

My two favorite seasons are Grimsborough and Pacific Bay! I have made 4 OCs, but will only present 3 of them today!

Kelly Riley, my player character and they are a 21 years old non-binary detective! They appear as my main character for my AU in season 1, 2, 5, 6, 7 and 8! They also dated Tess Goodwin for 3 years before the events of case 41,,,

Vincent Wade Watchbird, he is a policeman from White Peaks who later becomes a detective for Kelly! He appears first in White Peaks and the Wastes as a suspect, but is a main character in my AU in season 3, 5, 6, 7 and 8! He is also dating Faye who is Fluffy's OC (@anxietyfluffy) and was dating Duncan until,,, case 30 events

Desdemona, she is a 47 years old hairstylist from Jazz Town! (I forgot her wrinkles on that pic) She is also in love with Freddie for like 30 years and she helped him do his crimes. She is also a criminal for multiple reasons,,,,

[celestiarambles]

since we’re sharing our cc hot takes now, here are more cc unpopular opinions

- I don’t know why Jars is such a popular ship, Lars is literally old enough to be Jack’s father. Besties, or maybe a father-son figure type of shit would be fine, but as lovers, it just seems weird. If Jack was a girl, maybe you’d see my point.

- Amy in S2 was NOT a pick me. She was a naive rookie that was learning. Even after White Peaks where she went through a lot of stuff, she still wasn’t a pick me. She had a lot of unresolved issues that time to work with. Without all of that character development she went through, we would never had the girlboss Amy in Season 6.

- Continuation of the last bullet, I don’t like it when fans compare Guiletta (hope i spelled her name right) and Amy’s sufferings to each other. Both had suffered a ton in their respective seasons, and it should be acknowledged as such, not compared.

- The Bureau handled the Nomad Case (Case 8, Death in the Desert) very poorly. As an international organization, they should’ve done research and/or a background check on the nomadic people they were interrogating so they know how to communicate with them and to avoid offending/being disrespectful to them.

- The filicide (killing of one’s child) should be talked about more in CC, like the fairytale one and the jellyfish one in Pacific Bay because they were so fucked up.

- The Conspiracy wasn’t the first season to challenge the black and white morality of the police department the player was in. (side-eyeing you TV Tropes) There are countless of cases wherein the player’s black and white morality is challenged, and players should acknowledge that since CC covers countless of murders, not everything is black and white. Not all killers are completely bad nor are the victims innocent.

[appleflavoredkitkats]

you got any criminal case pacific bay headcannons?

bestie i love you thank you for sending me this ask . i haven't though of pacific bay for so long but i DO have some hc's about russell, amy, and hannah

it's long so i will keep it all under a cut:

so hannah and russell are the definition of Enemies But Not, because hannah likes to rile russell up a lot. russell often goes off into confusing, somewhat egotistical monologues and hannah is usually the first to cut him off. she would do it in the most asshole way, find an easy plot hole and cut him off, and it EMBARRASSES him in the bullpen and he would often walk out in frustration

i do hc that both hannah and russell, despite that, get along secretly because they are the only two trans characters in my eyes? i hc hannah as nb with she/they pronouns, while i hc russell as trans masc with any pronouns. they often have gender/sexuality discussions out when hannah has her smoke breaks. usually russell's snobbish façade dies here, and hannah becomes more serious with him. although, russell DOESN'T smoke. he tried once and was. very bad at it. he does try occassionally though, when worst comes to worst.

in terms of amy and russell, i have a hc that amy always delivers russell food if he overtimes (which is, a lot). russell doesn't really have family to get home to, and his office is cozy, so he tends to work late a ton. well, sometimes it's work, sometimes it's overcomplicating his stay with evidence he finds fascinating.

the only time she stays is after the last case in ivywood, because amy would know that russell is. extremely tired and, well, Bothered by the utopians. if you find out a cult you escaped opted to brainwash a ton of people, of COURSE you'd be fuckin stressed.

they have some lovely small talk, both of them talking about family and how they feel betrayed by them. russell, though, is more inclined of wanting jupiter to get out of the cult. maybe wants to help other escapees find psychological resources to help them recover. amy's still fighting all the wounds from white peaks, and is trying to escape miriam's home since she's EXTREMELY overbearing.

russell offers her his place, and amy says she'll think about it.

i still think amy and russell's romantic progression was underdeveloped and needed more hints/points of contexture. like, i do think they like each other and have got it hinted for a long time, but we never really understand Why. i like to believe that russell and amy see a more vulnerable side to each other that we can't really See outside of russell's office. because the main shift i see w their relationship, specifically with russell, is with how damn vulnerable that man gets. and russell isn't usually like that. but with amy he asks if she's okay, and hugs her, and saves her life— and yeah whatever this has now become an analysis of them both but do know i think they are super Neat!

also forgot to mention, i hc them both as bisexuals. in their talks in russell's office, amy rambles on about women and russell with men. that's very Them

[ehliena]

FilAms referring to the Philippines as the acronym PI while they are calling homelanders for the use of Filipinx and Pinxy is peak irony. That is without adding these two facts: the letter F is a loaned letter in Tagalog from the oppressors (and its corresponding phoneme too) and that the demonym is an appellation to Felipe II of Spain. And for someone like me who reads and writes in Baybayin since age 15, to write a Baybayin X seems like a dark humor scene in a Taika Waititi comedy. (Yes, I do Baybayin shiz for fun, but not as serious as Kristian Kabuay and NordenX.)

I first encountered PI among FilAms during Christmas vacation 2002 in LA; and Pilipinx when I joined the theatrical production of a FilAm musical at CalState East Bay in 2016. I understand that it is their culture and I respect it, and I assimilate. I easily assimilate with what I call my Nickelodeon voice, which I have acquired from when jailbroken cable services became a thing in Mega Manila and through my theatre background. But when in Rome, we live the Roman way, so as the Santa Mesa-born foreigner, I have to hide that dark laughter every single time someone uses PI.

But of course, 2020 had to make us see PI-using FilAms pressuring homelander to use Filipinx, citing political correctness and gender neutrality (while white American Pemberton, the killer of Filipino transwoman Jennifer Laude, was given an absolute pardon by Duterte).

So, let us start my TEDtalk.

P.I. is a colloquial acronym for Putanginamo (the equivalent of Fuck You) used by conservative Filipinos who probably are only retelling a story.

Tsismosa 1: “Minura ni Aling Biring si Ka Boying.” (Aling Biring cursed Ka Boying)

Tsismosa 2: “Oh? Ano ika?” (Really? What did she say?)

Tsismosa 1: “Malutong at umaatikabong PI.” (A hard and surging PI.)

Then I imagine PI as the curse when FilAms say some sentences:

“Are you flying back to Putangina?”

“I miss Putangina. We went to Boracay.”

“Duterte is President of Putangina.”

But it’s fine with me. I understand they mean well and I know that Americans, as first world as they are, have poor grasp of history. It’s a little sad though that FilAms have not always been reminded of this special footnote in the history of the United States:

P.I. stands for Philippine Islands. That’s the colonial name of the Philippines as a commonwealth republic under the United States, which the republic stopped using when the 1935 Constitution was enacted in 1946. Yes, in case people are forgetting, the Philippines has long been a state with full sovereignty recognized by the United Nations (of which we are a founding member of and wherein Carlos Romulo served as President) and recognized by Shaider Pulis Pangkalawakan.

Also, RP is used to refer to the Republic of the Philippines before the use of the standard two-letter country code PH.

I’m not saying FilAms should stop using PI to refer to the Philippines but I’m saying that the roots of that practice is from American oppression that homelanders have already cancelledttt.

Our oldest bank in the Philippines is BPI. It stands for Bank of the Philippine Islands, originally named El Banco Español Filipino de Isabel II because it was founded during Queen Isabella II’s reign. It was a public bank by then; perhaps comparable to the Federal Reserve. Upon its privatization during the American occupation, the bank started using BPI for the sake of branding because it was the Americans who christened us with P.I. (I have a theory that Manila was a character in Money Heist because the Royal Mint of Spain used to have a branch in the Philippines and operated very closely with BPI. And my other supernatural theory is that our translation of peso which is ‘piso’ affects our economy. ‘Piso’ means ‘floor’ or ‘flat’ in Spanish.)

Now, going back. To me, P.I. is more appropriate an acronym for the ethnic group of Pacific Islanders. I don't think I need to explain further why. These would be the natives of Hawai’i, Guam, Tuvalu, Kiribati, and other islands in the Oceania continent, and maybe even New Zealand. If a curious FilAm raises a question of whether Filipinos are Pacific Islanders or Asians or Hispanics, the answer is long but easy to understand.

The Filipinos live in a group of islands within the Pacific Plate. The Philippines is an Asian country, following conventions of geopolitical continental borders from the other. We are Hispanics by virtue of being under Spain for three fucking centuries. And Teresita Marquez is Reina Hispanoamericana because why not? (We could’ve been a part of America still if not for the efforts of Quezon.) So, the quick answer is that the Filipino is all of it.

Yes, the Filipinos have an affinity with the Pacific through nature and geography. Think of the earthquakes, volcanoes, flora and fauna, and the coconuts. And they even look like us. The earlier inhabitants of the archipelago were Pacific Islanders who were introduced to Hinduism and Buddhism as being closer to the cradles of civilization India and China. Then, the Islamic faith has grown along with the rise of the kingdoms and polities in Southeast Asia. The Spaniards arrived in the archipelago, to an already civilized Islamic polity - too civilized that they understood how diplomacy is necessary in war. We knew that it resulted to the defeat and death of Magellan who was fighting for Rajah ‘Don Carlos’ Humabon. Then came the 333 years of being under Spain AND (sic) the Catholic Church which made us more Hispanic. Our Austronesian/Malayo-Polynesian languages (Tagalog, Bisaya, Kapampangan, Ilocano, Bikol, Waray, Cuyonon, etc.) have kept our Asian identity intact - unlike Latin American countries where the official language of each is one of the Romance languages; thus "Latin".

(It is only towards the end of that 333-year Spanish rule that the 'Filipino' emerged to be something the oppressed could claim, and for that we thank the poet in Jose Rizal. I see a parallel in how Christians claimed the cross, the former symbol of criminals in Jewish tradition, to become the symbol of God’s love and salvation through Jesus. Wow. That’s so UST of me. Lol.)

You add into the mix that our diaspora is so large and identifiable, the data gatherers decided to mark the tables with “Filipino” - too Asian to be Hispanic and Pacific, too Pacific to be Hispanic and Asian, and too Hispanic to be Asian and Pacific.

What many FilAms do not realize everyday is that unlike the words Blacks, Latinx, Asians, or Pacific Islanders, or Hispanics, the word Filipino is not just a word denoting an ethnic group. At its highest technical form, the word Filipino is a word for the citizenship of a sovereign nation, enshrined in the constitution of a free people whose history hinges on the first constitutional republic in Asia.

By state, we mean a sovereign nation and not a federal state. (Well, even with Chinese intervention, at the very least we try.)

By state, we mean we are a people with a national territory, a government, and a legal system inspired by the traditions of our ancestors and oppressors. It may be ugly, but it is ours, and we have the power to change it.

This one may be as confusing as Greek-Grecian-Greco-Hellenic-Hellene, but let’s examine the word 'Filipino' further when placed side by side with related words.

*Pilipinas is the country; official name: Republika ng Pilipinas. It is translated into English as “Philippines”; official name: Republic of the Philippines. Spanish translates it into “Filipinas”, the Germans “Philippinen”, the French “Les Philippines”, the Italians “Filippine”.

*Pilipino refers to the people. It is translated into English as Filipino. The plural forms are ‘mga Pilipino’ and ‘Filipinos’.

*Philippine is an English adjective relating to the Philippines, commonly used for official functions. It may be used as an alternative to the other western adjective ‘Filipino’ but the interchangeability is very, very nuanced. Filipino people not Philippine people. Filipino government and Philippine government. Philippine Embassy, Filipino embassy, not Filipino Embassy. Tricky, eh?

*Filipino also refers to the official language of the state (which is basically Tagalog).

*Filipiniana refers to Philippine-related books and non-book materials (cultural items, games, fashion, etc.) which could be produced by Filipinos or non-Filipinos, inside or outside the Philippines.

*Pinoy is a colloquial gender-neutral demonym; comparable to how New Zealanders use the word Kiwi.

The demonym Filipino has evolved from that of referring only to Spaniards in the Philippines into becoming the term for the native people who choose to embrace the identity of a national.

It started from when Jose Rizal wrote his poem “A la juventud filipina” and he emerged as an inspiration to the Philippine Revolution through Andres Bonifacio’s leadership. (But take note of ‘filipina’ because ‘juventud’ is a feminine word in Spanish.)

Today, no less than the 1987 Philippine Constitution, which was neither written by Hamilton nor a group of straight white men but by people of different faiths, genders, disabilities, and skin colors, in its first five words in both Filipino and English versions read: "Kami, ang nakapangyayaring sambayanang Pilipino", translated as "We, the sovereign Filipino people” validates the legitimacy of the word as gender-neutral, alive, aware and awake with our history of struggles.

Article 14 Section 7 of the current Constitution says Filipino is the national language. And while I agree that it is not really a real language but an alias for Tagalog, it is a conscientious codification of a social norm during the time of Manuel Quezon as he is aiming for the world to recognize the unified Filipinos as a sovereign people. People. Not men. Not heterosexual men. People.

It is a non-issue for the homeland Filipino that the word Filipino refers to the people and the language. But FilAms are concerned of political correctness due to an understandable cultural insecurity also felt by other non-whites in the US. And there is added confusion when FilAms pattern the word Filipino after the patriarchal Spanish language, without learning that the core of the grammars of Philippine languages are gender-neutral. The Tagalog pronoun "siya" has no gender. "Aba Ginoong Maria" is proof that the Tagalog word 'ginoo' originally has no gender. Our language is so high-context that we have a fundamental preposition: “sa”.

It is difficult to be a person of color in the United States especially in these times of the white supremacy’s galling resurgence. Well, it’s not like they have been gone, but this time, with Trump, especially, it’s like the movement took steroids and was given an advertising budget. But for FilAms to force Filipinx into the Philippines, among homeland Filipinos, is a rather uneducated move, insensitive of the legacies of our national heroes and magnificent leaders.

The FilAm culture and the Filipino homeland culture are super different, nuanced. It’s a different dynamic for a Latinx who speak Spanish or Portuguese or whatever their native language is - it reminds entitled white English-speaking America of their place in the continent. It should remind a racist white man whose roots hail from Denmark that his house in Los Angeles stands on what used to be the Mexican Empire.

Let’s use a specific cultural experience by a Black person for example: the black person not only has Smith or Johnson for their last name, but there is no single easy way for them to retrieve their family tree denoting which African country they were from, unless the Slave Trade has data as meticulous as the SALN forms. Let’s use a specific cultural experience by a Mexican-American with Native American heritage: the person is discriminated by a white US Border Patrol officer in the border of Texas. Texas used to be part of Mexico. Filipinos have a traceable lineage and a homeland.

Filipinos and FilAms may be enjoying the same food recipes, dancing the same cultural dance for purposes of presentations every once in a while, but the living conditions, the geography, the languages, social experiences, the human conditions are different, making the psychology, the politics, the social implications more disparate than Latinxs like Mexicans and Mexican Americans.

I don’t know if it is too much advertising from state instruments or from whatever but FilAms don’t realize how insensitive they have become in trying to shove a cultural tone down the throats of the citizens of the republic or of those who have closer affinity to it. And some Filipino homelanders who are very used to accommodating new global social trends without much sifting fall into the trap of misplaced passions.

To each his own, I guess. But FilAms should read Jose Rizal’s two novels, Carlos Romulo’s “I am a Filipino”, materials by Miriam Defensor Santiago (not just the humor books), speeches of Claro Recto, books by historians Gregorio Zaide, Teodoro Agoncillo, Renato Constantino, Nick Joaquin, Regalado Trota Jose, Fidel Villaroel, Zeus Salazar, Xiao Chua, and Ambeth Ocampo, and really immerse themselves in the struggle of the Filipino for an unidentifiable identity which the FilAms confuse for the FilAm culture. That’s a little weird because unlike Blacks and the Latinx movement, the Philippines is a real sovereign state which FilAms could hinge their history from.

I have to be honest. The homelanders don’t really care much about FilAm civil rights heroes Philip Vera Cruz and Larry Itliong, or even Alice Peña Bulos, because it was a different fight. But the media can play a role sharing it, shaping consensus and inadvertently setting standards. (But it’s slightly different for Peña Bulos, as people are realizing she was already a somebody in the Philippines before becoming a who’s who in the US, which is somehow similar to the case of Lea Salonga who was not only from the illustrious Salonga clan, but was also already a child star.) How much do Filipino millennials know about Marcoses, Aquinos? Maybe too serious? Lol. Then, let’s try using my favorite examples as a couch potato of newer cultural materials accessible to FilAms - cultural materials on television and internet.

FilAms who only watched TFC wondered who Regine Velasquez was when ABSCBN welcomed her like a beauty queen. Those with the GMA Pinoy TV have a little idea. But they did not initially get why the most successful Filipino artist in the US, Lea Salonga, does not get that level of adulation at home that Velasquez enjoys. Was it just Regine’s voice? No. Well, kinda, maybe, because there is no question that she is a damn good singer with God knows how many octaves, but it is the culture she represents as a probinsyana who made it that far and chose to go back home and stay - and that’s already a cultural nuance Filipinos understand and resonate with, without having to verbalize because the Philippines is a high-context culture in general, versus the US which is low-context culture in general. I mean, how many Filipinos know the difference of West End and Broadway, and a Tony and an Olivier? What does a Famas or a Palanca mean to a FilAm, to a Filipino scholar, and to an ordinary Filipino? Parallel those ideas with "Bulacan", "Asia", "Birit", "Songbird".

You think Coach Apl.de.Ap is that big in the Philippines? He was there for the global branding of the franchise because he is an American figure but really, Francis Magalona (+) and Gloc9 hold more influence. And speaking of influence, do FilAms know Macoy Dubs, Lloyd Cadena (+) and the cultures they represent? Do FilAms know Aling Marie and how a sari-sari store operates within a community? Do FilAms see the symbolic functions of a makeshift basketball (half)courts where fights happen regularly? How much premium do FilAms put on queer icons Boy Abunda, Vice Ganda? Do FilAms realize that Kris Aquino's role in Crazy Rich Asians was not just to have a Filipino in the cast (given that Nico Santos is already there) but was also Kris Aquino's version of a PR stunt to showcase that Filipinos are of equal footing with Asian counterparts if only in the game of 'pabonggahan'? Will the FilAms get it if someone says ‘kamukha ni Arn-arn’? Do FilAms see the humor in a Jaclyn Jose impersonation? Do FilAms even give premiums to the gems Ricky Lee, Peque Gallaga, Joel Lamangan, Joyce Bernal, Cathy Garcia Molina, and Jose Javier Reyes wrote and directed? (And these are not even National Artists.) How about AlDub or the experience of cringing to edgy and sometimes downright disgusting remarks of Joey De Leon while also admiring his creative genius? Do FilAms understand the process of how Vic Sotto became ‘Bossing’ and how Michael V could transform into Armi Millare? Do FilAms get that Sexbomb doesn’t remind people of Tom Jones but of Rochelle? Do FilAms get that dark humor when Jay Sonza’s name is placed beside Mel Tiangco’s? What do FilAms associate with the names ‘Tulfo’, ‘Isko’, ‘Erap’, ‘Charo’, ‘Matet’, ‘Janice’, ‘Miriam’, ‘Aga’, ‘Imelda’ and ‘Papin’? Do FilAms get that majority of Filipinos cannot jive into Rex Navarette’s and Jo Koy’s humor but find the comic antics of JoWaPao, Eugene Domingo, Mr Fu, Ryan Rems, and Donna Cariaga very easy to click with? Do FilAms know Jimmy Alapag, Jayjay Helterbrand, Josh Urbiztondo? Oh wait, these guys are FilAms. Lol. Both cultures find bridge in NBA, but have these FilAms been to a UAAP, NCAA, or a PBA basketball game where the longstanding rival groups face each other? Do FilAms know the legacy of Ely Buendia and the Eraserheads? Do FilAms know about Brenan Espartinez wearing this green costume on Sineskwela? Do FilAms know how Kiko Matsing, Ate Sienna, Kuya Bodjie helped shape a generation of a neoliberal workforce?

That list goes on and on, when it comes to this type of Filipiniana materials on pop culture, and I am sure as Shirley Puruntong that while the homeland Filipino culture is not as widespread, it has depth in its humble and high-context character.

Now, look at the practical traffic experiences of the homelanders. People riding the jeepneys, the tricycles, the MRT/LRT, the buses, and the kolorum - the daily Via Crucis of Mega Manila only Filipinos understand the gravity of, even without yet considering the germs passed as the payments pass through five million other passengers before reaching the front. Add the probinsyas, people from periphery islands who cross the sea to get good internet connections or do a checkup in the closest first-class town or component city. Do FilAms realize that the largest indoor arena in the world is built and owned by Iglesia ni Cristo, a homegrown Christian church with a headquarters that could equal the Disney castle?

Do FilAms know the experience as a tourist's experience or as an experience a homelander want to get away from or at least improved?

Do FilAms understand how much an SM, a Puregold, or a Jollibee, Greenwich, Chowking branch superbly change a town and its psychology and how it affects the Pamilihang Bayan? Do FilAms realize that while they find amusement over the use of tabo, the homelanders are not amused with something so routinary? Do FilAms realize how Filipinos shriek at the thought that regular US households do not wash their butts with soap and water after defecating?

Do FilAms understand the whole concept of "ayuda" or SAP Form in the context of pandemic and politics? The US has food banks, EDDs, and stubs - but the ayuda is nowhere near the first world entitlements Filipinos in the homeland could consider luxury. But, that in itself is part of the cultural nuance.

Do FilAms know that Oxford recognizes Philippine English as a diction of the English language? While we’ve slowly grown out of the fondness for pridyider and kolgeyt, do FilAms know how xerox is still used in the local parlance? Do FilAms know how excruciating it is to read Panitikan school books Ibong Adarna, Florante at Laura under the curriculum, and how light it is to read Bob Ong? Do FilAms realize that Jessica Zafra, with all her genius, is not the ordinary homelander’s cup-of-tea?

Do FilAms know that Filipinos do not sound as bad in English as stereotypes made them believe? Do FilAms really think that Philippines will be a call center capital if our accents sound like the idiolects of Rodrigo Duterte’s or Ninoy Aquino’s Philippine English accent? Do FilAms realize how Ninoy and Cory speak English with different accents? Lea Salonga's accent is a thespian's accent so she could do a long range like that of Meryl Streep if she wants to so she wouldn't be a good example. Pacquiao's accent shows the idiolect unique to his region in southern Philippines. But for purposes of showing an ethnolinguistic detail, I am using President Cory Aquino’s accent when she delivered her historic speech in the US Congress as a more current model of the Philippine English accent.

Do FilAms bother themselves with the monsoons, the humidity, and the viscosity of sweat the same way they get bothered with snowstorms, and heat waves measured in Fahrenheit?

Do FilAms know that not only heterosexual men are accepted in the Katipunan? Do FilAms even know what the Katipunan is? Do FilAms realize that the Philippines had two female presidents and a transwoman lawmaker? Do FilAms take “mamatay nang dahil sa’yo” the same way Filipinos do? Do FilAms know the ground and the grassroots? Do FilAms know the Filipino culture of the homeland?

These are cultural nuances FilAms will never understand without exposure of Philippine society reflected from barrio to lalawigan, from Tondo to Forbes Park. It goes the same way with Filipinos not understanding the cultural weight of Robert Lopez and the EGOT, or Seafood City, or Lucky Chances Casino, or what Jollibee symbolizes in New York, unless they are exposed.

The thing though is that while it is harder for FilAms to immerse to the homeland culture, it is easier for homeland culture to immerse into the FilAm’s because America’s excess extends to the propagation of its own subcultures, of which the FilAm’s is one.

We’re the same yet we’re different. But it should not be an issue if we are serious with embracing diversity. There should not be an issue with difference when we could find a common ground in a sense of history and shared destiny. But it is the burden of the Filipinos with and in power to understand the situation of those who have not.

Nuances. Nuances. Nuances.

And while I believe that changing a vowel into X to promote gender-neutrality has a noble intention, there is no need to fix things that are not broken. Do not be like politicians whose acts of service is to destroy streets and roads and then call for its renovation instead of fixing broken bridges or creating roads where there are none.

The word ‘Filipino’ is not broken. Since Rizal’s use of the term to refer to his Malayan folks, the formal process of repair started. And it is not merely codified, but validated by our prevailing Constitution, which I don’t think a FilAm would care to read, and I cannot blame them. What's in it for a regular FilAm? They wouldn’t read the US Constitution and the Federalist Papers; what more the 1987 Saligang Batas?

The bottomline of my thoughts on this particular X issue is that FilAms cannot impose a standard for Filipinos without going through a deeper, well-thought-out, more arduous process, most especially when the card of gender neutrality and political correctness are raised with no prior and deeper understanding of what it is to be a commoner in the homeland, of what it is to be an ordinary citizen in a barangay, from Bayan ng Itbayat, Lalawigan ng Batanes to Bayan ng Sitangkai, Lalawigan ng Sulu. It is very dangerous because FilAms yield more influence and power through their better access to resources, and yet these do not equate to cultural awareness.

Before Rizal’s political philosophy of Filipino, the ‘Filipino’ refers to a full-blooded Spaniard born in the Philippines, and since Spain follows jus sanguinis principle of citizenship, back then, ‘Filipino’ is as Spaniard as a ‘Madrileño’ (people in Madrid). The case in point is Marcelo Azcárraga Palmero - the Filipino Prime Minister of Spain.

But the word ‘Filipino’ was claimed by Rizal and the ilustrados to refer to whom the Spaniards call ‘indio’. The term was then applied retroactively to those who helped in the struggle. It was only later that Lapu-Lapu, Francisco Dagohoy, Gabriela and Diego Silang, Sultan Kudarat, Lorenzo Ruiz, and GOMBURZA were called Filipinos.

The word 'Filipino' was long fixed by the tears and sweat of martyrs through years of bloody history in the hands of traitors within and oppressors not just of the white race. The word Filipino is now used by men, women, and those who do not choose to be referred to as such who still bears a passport or any state document from the Republic of the Philippines. Whether a homelader is a Kapuso, Kapamilya, Kapatid, DDS, Dilawan, Noranian, Vilmanian, Sharonian, Team Magnolia, Barangay Ginebra, Catholic, Muslim, Aglipayan, Iglesia, Victory, Mormon, IP, OP, SJ, RVM, SVD, OSB, OSA, LGBTQQIP2SAA, etc., the word 'Filipino' is a constant variable in the formula of national consciousness.

Merriam-Webster defines Filipina as a Filipino girl or woman. Still a Filipino. Remember, dictionaries do not dictate rules. Dictionaries provide us with the meaning. To me, the word Filipina solidified as a subtle emphasis to the Philippines as a matriarchal country faking a macho look. But that’s not saying the word Filipino in the language is macho with six-pack.

The word Filipino is not resting its official status on the letter O but in its quiddity as a word and as an idea of a sovereign nation. The words Pilipino, Filipino, and Pinoy are not broken. What is broken is the notion that a Filipino subculture dictates the standard for political correctness without reaching the depth of our own history.

If the Filipinx-Pinxy-Pilipinx movement truly suits the Filipino-American struggle, my heart goes out for it. But my republic, the Philippines, home of the Filipino people, cradle of noble heroes, has no need for it (not just yet, maybe) - not because we don't want change, but because it will turn an already resolved theme utterly problematic. The Filipinos have no need for it, not because we cannot afford to consider political correctness when people are hungry, abused, and robbed off taxes. We could afford to legalize a formal way of Filipino greeting for purposes of national identity. But as far as the Filipinx, it should not be the homeland’s priority.

We may be poor, but we have culture.

From Julius Payàwal Fernandez's post

[ccohanlon]

life’s a beach

The Barrenjoey Peninsula points like a crooked finger across the mouth of Broken Bay, a large, natural harbor and estuary, north of Sydney. On maps, it is drafted into Sydney's metropolitan sprawl. Twenty-odd miles from the center by road, the Peninsula is technically the northernmost extension of the heavily built-up suburbs that are strewn along the coast on either side of the city's best-known landmark, the Harbor Bridge.

And yet, as anybody who lives here will be quick to tell you (inevitably, resorting to cliché), the Barrenjoey Peninsula is really a patch of God's own country. The cliché is easy to forgive. On the Peninsula's eastern side, sandstone headlands and surf beaches and wide, scalloped bays face the Pacific Ocean, while its western side forms a shore of a deep, protected inlet — the Pittwater — edged with shallows, rocky flats and beaches. There, gnarled eucalyptus trees, ferns and lantana grow down between wooden boathouses to the water, where hundreds of small craft swing with the tide on moorings or strain against warps tied to white-painted jetties.

When my family first moved to the Peninsula, 33 years ago, no more than a couple of thousand people lived in four small towns scattered along five miles of narrow blacktop that snaked up and around the hillside forests and down beside the surf beaches. It was a casual, loosely knit community — a few shopkeepers looking forward to the weekend and summer vacation trade, some slightly bohemian writers and painters taking advantage of the cheap rents and the scenery, and a nomadic bunch of surfers who, in those days before big-money competitions, were mostly regarded as undesirable, unemployed bums. The houses were fiberboard or timber bungalows with corrugated tin roofs, surrounded by gum trees and tangled subtropical shrubs. Possums pilfered the garbage and koalas stupefied by gum leaves lumbered aimlessly through the streets.

There are still signs nailed to roadside telephone poles warning motorists about the koalas, but there are fewer koalas around these days. A lot of the bushland has been subdivided and sold off for home sites, shopping arcades and offices. The towns remain relatively small but slowly they are being transformed into fashionable suburbs, complete with boutiques, art galleries, fancy delicatessens and restaurants. Nowadays, a tin-roofed shack on the waterfront can cost you a third of a million dollars.

Somehow, though, the Peninsula manages to hang on to its footloose character. The city and its mud-brown pall of smog seems to loom nearer - it is nearer and hundreds of us commute to it every day - but psychologically it's a long way away. The Peninsula's air is scrubbed clean by the salt-laden ocean breezes and the greenery is still dense enough to disguise the close proximity of one house to another. And there are the beaches. Whatever else has changed, life on the Peninsula still revolves around its beaches. Even in winter, many people begin their day jogging along the foreshore or the soft slopes of the dunes, swimming in the rock pools or riding the waves that peak and break on the shelving banks near the headlands. Afterward, they peel off their swimsuits in the beachfront parking lots, towel down and don sober business attire, then drive straight to work.

Everybody here has a favorite surf beach, one that he or she is drawn to most often out of the half a dozen on the Peninsula. Mine is Newport. And if pushed for a reason, I'd have to admit that it's because it reminds me of a beach in 1960's Southern California, somewhere they might have filmed one of those beach-blanket B-movies starring Sandra Dee and Tab Hunter.

Only a row of pines and a parking lot stand between the wide half-moon of sand and the rows of box-like shops and offices that form the town's main strip on either side of Barrenjoey Road. The nearness of the beach seeps into the local consciousness like a drug. Barefoot women in bikinis or light cotton wraps wander happily along the sidewalks; teen-age surfers with impressive muscle tone stand in the open fronts of milk bars, clutching their shiny, multicolored boards. The musky whiff of salt air, hot skin and coconut oil seems to cling even to the postcards.

There is much the same atmosphere at Avalon and Whale Beach, north of Newport — although with an added element of high style. Avalon, Whale Beach and Palm Beach are where the 'A' list of Sydney's social register camps out in summer, renting lavish haciendas in which to entertain a few of the local residents — such as the film director Peter Weir, the actor Bryan Brown and his wife, the actress Rachel Ward, the author Thomas Keneally and the opera singer Joan Sutherland.

Bilgola is different. Quiet and out of the way, it nestles in a subtropical valley below the main road between Newport and Avalon. Thick rain forest grows down a narrow cleft in the hillside to the edge of the beach where palm trees and strange-looking succulents encircle the houses, shutting out all but a few bright blades of light.

Palm Beach is the most northern — and, no doubt about it, the most beautiful — of the beaches: a mile or more of orange sand fringed at its southern end with windblown pine and palm trees, the steep hills above it falling to low grassland and empty dunes. The dunes reach up to the sandstone buttresses of Barrenjoey Head, at the end of the Peninsula, to form a sort of dike between the ocean and the Pittwater. A stone lighthouse stands on top of the Head; built in 1881, it's one of the oldest structures left on the Peninsula.

To the hundreds of visitors who flock there at weekends, Palm Beach is the essential Peninsula — and, maybe, the essential Australian — experience. Families of newly arrived Mediterranean immigrants fetch extravagant picnics for 10 or 20 people from the trunks of brand-new, Japanese-built sedans and lay them out on the grass at Governor Phillip Park. Their children play soccer on the sand or swim in the surf, under the watchful eyes of black-clad elders. Hikers stride along the Pittwater side of the dunes, to the roughly hewn trails that either ascend to the lighthouse — from where the views of Broken Bay and Palm Beach are heart-stopping — or wind around the base of the Head. Deeply suntanned men in white cotton trousers and shirts and long-limbed women in designer beachwear drape themselves on the veranda of the Cabbage Tree Club on Ocean Road, opposite the beach. The club is Sydney's most exclusive watering hole, but oddly, it's an exclusivity based not on wealth or political clout (even though its membership has plenty of both) but on whether one has been an active member of a local surf life-saving club.

There is a natural balance between the outcrops of tumbled-down rock washed by curling surf on one side of the Peninsula and the sheltered calm of the Pittwater, where cormorants, seagulls, ibises and pelicans pick at the sandy crab-holes and stranded shellfish above the low-tide mark. Even the vegetation on the shores of the Pittwater seems more tropical, more abundant: bamboo, palms, rubber plants and banana trees, flowering frangipani, strelitzia, hibiscus and jacaranda trees all grow on top of each other along the roadsides and the unkempt perimeters of private gardens. On warm summer evenings, a sweet, humid scent hangs in the air to mix with the charcoal smoke of barbecue fires. Thousands of cicadas buzz and click in the undergrowth.

These are the kinds of evenings when I like to sit on Paradise or Clareville Beach — both small, secluded stretches of fine, pale sand and flat water, a few minutes' drive from the shops at Avalon — and watch the sun go down behind the green-black hills on the western shores of the Pittwater. The hills are part of the Ku-Ring-Gai Chase National Park, 35,000 acres of bushland covering most of the southern shore of Broken Bay and, farther west, Cowan Creek. When the park was established in 1894, all of the country's east coast must have looked as raw and forbidding: everywhere, walls of fractured sandstone, forest and scrub.

Mackerel is a tiny beach community on the eastern edge of the park, opposite Palm Beach, inaccessible by road. The few hundred year-round residents rely on the ferry service from the Palm Beach public wharf, or their own small craft, to bring what they need across the Pittwater. The inconvenience, a friend who lives there tells me, is outweighed by the tranquillity and unspoiled beauty. Wild ducks, wallabies, ring-tailed possums, koalas and, less welcome, brown, black and tiger snakes stray unafraid into backyards and even kitchens, scavenging for food. A freshwater creek flows through the grass-covered flats to the beach where it warms the pools of salt water left behind by the tide on the sandbanks.

Adjacent to Mackerel, and reached by the same ferry, is The Basin. It is popular as a yacht anchorage and as a pine-shaded, beachside campsite, but The Basin's appeal as a place to picnic, enjoy the scenery and swim in the safe lagoon — a net keeps the sharks out — wears thin in summer when the inlet is crowded and noisy. In spring or autumn, when the days are cooler and the vacationers have gone home, there are well-marked trails that meander up through the bush and along the cliff tops. Half-hidden under rocky overhangs and inside shallow caves are primitive paintings, the last traces of a local aboriginal culture wiped out by white settlers at the turn of the century.

There are days on the Peninsula when the heat and humidity make the slightest body movement seem like a penance. I live in a big, timber-framed place built back in the early 1950's on a half-acre oceanfront at Whale Beach, but even here, in summer, I have to open all the doors and windows to catch a breeze. Often, the only thing to do is prepare a rum-laced fruit punch, find a good book — an early Thomas McGuane novel, maybe, or a collection of Tennessee Williams stories, something with the right mood of sweet-smelling, tropical decay about it — and lie naked in a deck chair on the veranda until dusk.

Today is going to be one of those days. Right now, as I write, the sun is coming up. A warm, almost crimson light spills off the clouds gathered low over the ocean. There's no wind. A long swell is rolling in from the east, foaming over the rocky ledges beneath the headlands as it arcs towards the beach. With the French doors open, all I can hear are bird song and the whispered rushing of the surf.

First published in The New York Times’ Travel & Leisure section (under the by-line, Chris West), USA, 1986.

[4lyeskas]

a dialogue, not a fight

read it on AO3 SERIES: Voltron Legendary Defender PAIRING: Shiro x Keith RATING: T+ (allusions to past character death and violence) TAGS: past character death (Matt Holt); mentions of violence; pre-slash; Pacific Rim AU

a commission for sumafocases on Twitter

[ do not repost/edit | buy me a ko-fi? ]

----------

Five years ago, almost everyone would have pegged Shiro as a champion fighter. One of the Garrison’s top pilots, the Jaeger program’s poster boy, the wonderkid.

Shiro the Hero, they’d called him.

With the Voltron Jaeger, he and Matt had had six Kaiju kills on their list. On their watch, the California line had gone unbreached for three years, until it hadn’t.

Shiro remembers. Those kinds of things, they stick.

He still wakes up some nights to the sickened feeling of someone being there in his head and then not.

The winter starts to roll in. The cold makes his skin sting where it meets the metal and plastic of the prosthetic arm.

He lets it hurt.

He keeps his distance from the Garrison, the Jaeger program. They don’t look for him. He changes the channel whenever anything shows up on the news.

The emptiness of Matt’s room almost hurts more than the cards that Mr. Holt still sends every Christmas.

At the peak of the Jaeger program, the pilots had been rock stars. Shiro had been so uncomfortable sitting for interviews, posing for photos, seeing himself plastered on magazines.

The thing about being the poster boy for success is that it makes you an easy poster boy for failure. Pilot error is as good a reason as any for the failure of a three-Jaeger mission, as the program finds itself on shakier and shakier ground.

These days, nobody recognizes Shiro on the street anymore, which is fine by him.

He’s not a hero.

Allura finds him in Santa Monica, picking up shifts on the coastal wall project.

Not that the wall matters, not after they’ve just seen a Kaiju smash through it like it’s tissue paper. Shiro turns away from the news and walks out of the crowd of construction workers, into the cold. It takes him a moment to realize the gale whipping at him isn’t from the weather.

The helicopter lands some distance away from the construction site. Shiro can already guess what it’s here for.

Allura exits the helicopter gracefully, one hand holding her hair in place. She doesn’t seem at all surprised to see him there.

“Shiro,” she says, polite as you please. “It’s been a while.”

“Allura,” he parries. “You look well.”

“Indeed.” Her smile is thin and sharp, a scalpel blade. No pretenses. “Can I have a word?”

“You were rather difficult to find,” she comments, once they’re inside the relative warmth of the warehouse. “I had to chase you across a few cities.”

“Been moving along the wall.” Shiro shrugs. “Gotta make a living. What do you want?”

Allura looks at him for a long moment before she answers. “I’ve spent the last half year activating anything and everything we could get our hands on. Like an old Jaeger, a Kerberos unit. You might know it.” She raises an eyebrow. “It needs a pilot.”

Shiro snorts. “Doubt I’m the first choice here.”

“No, you are.” Allura leans against a pile of scaffolding. “In fact, you’re my only choice. The other Kerberos pilots are dead.”

This time Shiro takes a while before responding. He sighs, long and heavy; runs a hand through his hair. “Look--” He breaks off, bites his lip. “I can’t have anyone in my head again. And after the Garrison pinned all that on me, I can’t see why you’d want me.”

He shrugs, drops his shoulders, his head. Exhales sharp and pained.

“Haven’t you heard, Shiro?” Something about Allura’s tone makes Shiro look up. There’s the tiniest of smiles at the corners her eyes, her mouth. “The world is ending. So where would you rather die? Here, or in a Jaeger?”

The new base is at Kowloon Bay.

“The Garrison’s cut all funding for the program,” Allura tells him on the way over. “They let us transport the last Jaegers here, but other than that we’re on our own.”

“So we’re the cavalry,” Shiro quips, smirking.

“No.” There’s a twinkle in Allura’s eyes. “We’re the resistance.”

She takes him straight through the hangar to where they’re restoring his old Jaeger. They pass by the other units that are still active, other pilots. Shiro recognizes Ulaz and Thace, their Marmora Jaeger. He knows Pidge will be somewhere in all this, up to her elbows in Kaiju parts. He has half a mind to ask Allura, but saves it for later.

Voltron looms over them, looking almost like new.

Allura beams up at it. “She’s been almost completely done over. Keith tells me she’s got a whole new core, the newest tech.”

Shiro tears his attention away long enough to ask, “Keith?”

“Me,” says a voice from behind them. Shiro turns around to find a young man standing behind them, red jacket and a mess of black hair. He gives Shiro a once-over, then turns to the Jaeger. “I’m the mechanic.”

His scrappiness makes Shiro smile. “I’m the pilot.”

Keith sneaks a glance out of the corner of his eye. Shiro could swear he looks amused. “I know.”

If Keith thinks Shiro doesn’t recognize him after five years, he’s sorely mistaken. He just doesn’t know why the Garrison’s prodigy is out here working as a Jaeger grease monkey.

He’s only mildly surprised to find that when he steps into the gym -- when he can’t sleep, when he goes to quiet the restlessness under his skin -- Keith is already there.

In just a tank top and loose pants, he looks stronger than Shiro’s first impression. Keith startles a bit at the sudden intrusion, expression wary when he realizes who’s there.

“I don’t think I got to introduce myself earlier.” Shiro offers what he hopes is a friendly smile. “I’m Shiro.”

Keith looks at him flatly before pulling out some tape. “I know.”

So prickly, Shiro muses.

“And I know you.” Shiro looks Keith over. Decides to be a little brazen. “I’ve seen your fights.”

“And?” It’s almost a challenge.

“And what?”

Keith almost rolls his eyes. “What did you think?”

“You’re… unpredictable,” Shiro says, trying to be diplomatic. When Keith just stares at him with eyebrows raised, Shiro huffs out a laugh. “Fine. You’re volatile. You constantly deviate from standard protocols and combat techniques. You take risks that put you, your crew, and your surroundings in danger. You couldn’t hold a partner for more than a year.”

Keith snorts, rolls his eyes. “I have a ten-hit kill list.”

“I know.” Shiro grins. “I never said you weren’t good.”

Red blooms high on Keith’s cheeks before he can turn away. “Flattery’s gonna get you nowhere.”

Shiro just laughs again. “Allura said you had a hand in picking out my co-pilot candidates.”

Keith shrugs, starts to wrap his hands.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Shiro says, and heads back to his room.

There are four co-pilot candidates lined up. Allura’s vetted them herself. They’re well-trained and highly skilled. Shiro knocks all of them down to the mat with ease, in thirty minutes total.

Allura is unimpressed. Their audience murmurs in appreciation, admiration. There’s just one person that Shiro’s looking for, though.

(The red jacket tied around his waist is a dead giveaway.)

“Can we change this up?” Shiro asks loudly, turning to Allura where she stands at the head of the room. “Because this is getting us nowhere.”

“Do you have any suggestions?” she asks pointedly.

“Actually, I do.” Shiro adjusts his grip on the stave, swinging it round to point directly at Keith, who’s been standing at the back of the room. “How about we let him try?”

Allura narrows her eyes, just a little. “He’s our Jaeger mechanic.”

“And he’s wasted being stuck back here.” Shiro stands firm, holds her gaze. “You know how good he is.”

Allura stares him down. Shiro holds his ground. Then she sighs, turns to Keith. “Do you want to?”

Keith looks from Allura to Shiro, pursing his lips. Shiro looks right back in a challenge.

After a long moment, Keith pushes lithely off the wall, tugs his jacket off his waist.

“Fine.”

The room falls silent as Keith sets his boots at the edge of the mat, stave light in his hand. He walks up to and past Shiro, shoulders back, head high.

“Remember, this is about compatibility. It’s a dialogue, not a fight.” Shiro takes his place at the other end of the mat, smirking. “But I’m not gonna dial down my moves.”

“Good.” Keith’s answering grin is more feral, bared teeth. “Neither will I.”

Shiro moves first. Keith lets him. The stave stops a hair’s breadth from Keith’s forehead, but he doesn’t even flinch.

“One,” Shiro says quietly.

There is the space of a breath, then Keith’s knocked Shiro’s stave out of the way. He ducks around and Keith’s weapon is at Shiro’s throat.

“One-one,” Keith says, and there’s a smirk somewhere in that tone.

You’re on.

Keith fights like he pilots a Jaeger: fast, reckless, intense. He’s quick, stronger than Shiro expected. His approach makes Shiro think of a scrap fight in a back alley, bruised knuckles and a cut on the cheek.

Shiro does combat like in his own Jaeger: grounded, tactical, a solid and unwavering force. He keeps himself braced against Keith’s attacks, watches for openings and covers. Patience yields focus. Strategy yields victory.

Needless to say, they are evenly matched, and it’s exhilarating.

By the time Allura calls a stop to the fight, it’s four-three to Keith. Both of them are breathing heavily; Keith’s hair tied high and Shiro’s matted to his forehead. There’s a spot on Shiro’s ribs that’ll bruise in the morning.

But Keith’s smirk is echoed by the satisfaction ringing in Shiro’s body as they look at each other across the mat, so it’s worth it.

Here are their truths:

Keith carries anger with him like the knife strapped to his right thigh. He holds too many things close to his chest and resents having people in his head. Fury is an excellent mask for insecurity and fear. When you have lost too much, you remake yourself so that you keep no one and nothing, so you have nothing to lose anymore.

Shiro carries guilt with him written in the scars on his body, the raw edges of skin bitten into by metal and plastic. He wields it like a shield, lets it pool in his lungs. For all that he objectively knows it was not his fault, the thought still imprisons him with its weight. Self-destruction is not redemption but he doesn’t know what else to do.

Here is what they do:

Shiro stands beside Keith and teaches him that he doesn’t have to fight the world on his own, that there is more than enough to him and it is worth every effort.

Keith unspools Shiro’s brokenness and shame and says, I am staying right here, because Shiro is what he is and it is still worth everything.

In the drift, there is nothing you can hide.

But with everything between them, ragged edges and faint hope, they make it work.

The first time they hold the neural handshake successfully, the first time the Voltron Jaeger comes back to life -- the first time Shiro sees Keith laugh, head thrown back and carefree -- it makes the struggle worth it.

Shiro looks over at Keith and winks. “Let’s kick some Kaiju ass.”

Keith’s answering grin is like sunshine.