#but seeing videos like this reminds me when I literally took a nail file to my chin and neck as a KID to make it SMALLER

[kenneduck]

tiktok told me I can't touch grass anymore

[ahjustroza]

Do you have any hcs abt Last Legacy modern au?

Sorry for the wait! I just write very slow 🥺😭 btw I am still writing other requests! I'll post them as soon as I finish writing ✨😌😏 And YES I still take requests😏😏😏

Lol btw I haven't played the catboy Felix tale yet but found his delicious CG. Also, there might be typos etc. My dyslexia was a hoe for the last couple of days (･_･

Last Legacy Modern Au Headcanons

Sage

Lmao the first time you went to his place you faced with an ancient-looking old computer that he found in a garage sale

"It still works"

"Sage with its monitor alone you can heat your entire house in winter"

"Aye, but I don't have to use that to get heated if you catch my drift."

Let me give you a concept: thrift store dates

You took him to a thrift store once and thought it might be fun

But at the moment you entered the store Sage found a damn fake fur jacket and gold sunglasses

He will buy anything with a famous brand logo and say it is original and is an antique

But he'll only do that to annoy people

Mostly.

Sage cares about his looks but doesn't go crazy about it

Before dating you he just lived his life like a street kid like in cyberpunk 2077

Sage and Tulsi grew up in slums and then Sage got an apartment so that Tulsi could grow up in a safe environment

He didn't go to college but made sure that Tulsi did

Sage basically works as a mercenary in the modern au as well

He travels a lot and has to disappear for a looong long time

Tulsi is used to it but you aren't

Once you two are in a relationship and he feels ready to settle down he might get a job closeby to your shared house

You made him realize that he needs his family around him

And now he is not alone to carry all the burden by himself

He knows that if he can't make it in time you will be there to help out Tulsi or take care of all the work for him

He feels lighter around you

Also, he makes many people jealous on the streets lol

Whenever you two are on a date no one can believe that you, a literal divine being, could look at a Boku no pico catboy maid-sama man like him.

He is also jealous of you

But never possessive

He likes to send you out of context memes in the worst possible times ever

Like you got Luigi and Mario animations, doing the waltz, with the Britney Spears' Toxic song during the busiest hour of your shift

He also texted "This us"

The audacity

Sage would also LOVE video games

Especially Final Fantasy games

But he suck at playing them so he makes you play instead

And he'll give instructions too

"I saw a checkpoint in the other room babe,"

"Love, I gotta run away from the boss right now."

"It's not the boss, bosses have their boss rooms. This is an obstacle"

Sage also suck at filing taxes

So good luck with that

I can see Sage having PTSD treatments because of his traumatized childhood and the life he had to live until now after settling down with you

You convinced him to go to therapy and Tulsi backed you up

So he will take medications every day

At first, you had to remind him a lot, but then he just made it an addiction and now doesn't need reminders

He was never happier and finally had a taste of a healthy and caring relationship with you

He is also not so terrible with putting the IKEA furniture together.

Felix

He got expelled from Harvard.

Then his rich father had to convince the headmaster to reconsider the decision and Felix ended up with suspension instead smh

Felix's grades are great but he has disciplinary issues

I can see him majoring in criminal justice and mortuary science

Or maybe just mortuary science

Escell was very disappointed in him.

He is also famous for dating with the valedictorian among Harvard graduates

Then they broke up and you yeeted yourself in his life

Or he yeeted himself to your arms

He literally dramatically fell one day and you happened to be close to catch him

Then the Titanic music played in the background with the slow summer rain fell down to your heads

You are hot so he was flustered

Like he internally screamed when he fell in your arms

Or shall I say fell in love?

You two then started as friends since not too later he found out that he might actually have a chance with you after you mentioned your love of video games and romance books

After starting to date he confessed that he has an AO3 account asddgf

Rime was a burden too

He was the one who broke Felix's heart

But still wanted him to only love him and him alone

Then you were like

"Hoe listen to me..."

Rime hot

But no

Felix cried until morning the day you fist fought Rime in the grocery store parking lot

AAHGDHFA

Scylla secretly approved your determination that day and watched the fight afar

Escell got drunk and Florian came home the day after for everyone's explanations

The deeper your relationship got the more a part of his family you become

I mean every Friday it was now a routine that Felix and you attended family dinner

No one even asks anymore they just put your plate down and Escell hides his most expensive wine bottles from everyone

Felix is not good to live in his own house though

He always lived with someone in the house so he wasn't alone

Ever.

When you moved into the same house with him Felix was relieved

You two will be emos together and watch fifty shades of grey movies during the quarantine

Please ask Felix if he thinks the movie is interesting, he will avoid you all day long

Then become a blanket burrito at night lmao

Oh btw he might tell you random facts about mortuary

Like you are in the shower and he comes in to brush his teeth

Then he'll tell you a fact you didn't have to know then leave

"Truly fascinating, if you ask me."

He is also the type to text you from the other side of the room

Or call you from the other room to ask you if you can bring him something to eat

Felix would also love to go to the farmers' market too

"Finally some quality food."

Whenever you two go on a vacation together

lmao someone ALWAYS takes his hand and reads his palm

Only to be ended up getting scolded and getting a proper palm reading from Felix

Anisa

Call her and ask if she wants drive tru

"Love, it is thREE IN THE MORNING, I have work tomorrow-"

"So two? Or nah?"

"Get a coffee."

Actually, she wants a cookie but won't admit it

She knows you'll get her a cookie

You always get her a cookie with coffee

Anisa might be a great investigator if you ask me

If not a detective or a police chief or lieutenant

But I think she would work in law enforcement

Or she might also start her own company and rise as well

Unlike Sage and Felix, Anisa will not live in the same house with you before she decides to settle down for good

It's not because she doesn't want you around her

But because she is always at work and doesn't want to leave everything to you to handle at home

But she is always with you on her day offs

Will call you once a day at least

Text you during her breaks or whenever she can

If you can show up at her workplace during the lunch break she will take you to the nearest coffee shop

"Their coffee is not nearly as good as yours, but among other shops, this is the most drinkable one."

She will spoil you during your dates!

She likes to see you smile and will do anything for you to have a good time with her

So expect sweets, movie nights, amusement park dates, or just traveling during both of your yearly week/month offs/breaks

She won't admit it but likes it when you try to match your clothes with hers

She will know your favorite everythings lol

Take her to a dinner date and she will be so happy and feel spoiled

She will let you paint her nails

Let you get all the hot water in the shower

Will let you wear her clothes

Pillow fights are allowed every now and then

When she gets sick she'll try to power through but likes it when you baby her

Whenever you get sick she will try to not fuss over you but every 15 minutes she'll ask to take you to see a doctor

She is a cereal gal

You might have to drag her to bed many nights because she will take work at home

Oh my god, do play dungeons and dragons with her

If you visited somewhere she has never been she will ask a lot of questions about your trip

Likes to binge a tv series you two found online

Also enjoys just silent but comfortable moments with you

When you read your book she will gaze at you

All heart eyes

Will put her favorite picture of you two as her profile picture in her social media accounts

Will like your every post

ALWAYS TEXTS BACK TO YOU. ALWAYS.

Never leaves you on read/seen

She will either give you a proper text or just let you know that she is busy at the moment

Also if you come home later than her she will ask if you want her to prepare anything special you want for dinner

otherwise, she'll do dishes that you both like anyway

If she is late, she'll call you to ask if you need anything from the grocery store, etc.

[thisaccisdead]

give up on a miracle - sanders sides au - chp. 1

pairing(s): as of now, romantic nicomas and platonic everyone else

warnings: lots of religious stuff

summary: patton, virgil, logan, and janus are angels in charge of answering prayers. when they find out the earth is scheduled to be destroyed in a week, their only hope for saving it is to set up two humans: thomas sanders and nico flores.

word count: 3.5k

notes: this is a based off of miracle workers but not an exact au, idk it’ll be fun, you don’t have to have seen the show, you just have to like silly angel shenanigans 

Please, God, let this somehow work out.

Thomas didn’t ask for miracles too often. Well—that was a lie, he probably prayed for some inconsequential thing everyday, but he rarely meant it the way he meant this one. The man at the mall felt like fate. He was beautiful, and according to his backpack he was gay, and he was just a few tables down, and... Thomas should have just said hi as soon as he had noticed him, but he had psyched himself out. Like always.

Usually that would be the end of the story, but as Thomas was headed for the exit, the man was there too. In front of him. Speaking to him.

Thomas was too caught off guard to process the first half of what he said—though he did register being given back his abhorrent carrot snack—and when he tuned back in, all he caught was:

“Uh, it’s okay! It’s probably a bit too nosy for me to ask anyway.”

“Uh, yeah! Super nosy! What’s wrong with you, man?” was the sentence that came out of Thomas’s mouth in response. He blamed his lips for coming up with it, because he knew his mind couldn’t have been involved.

“Yeah, sorry about that,” the man smiled apologetically at him, and even that small, sheepish smile was so radiant… yeah, Thomas was mentally beating the shit out of himself. “Well, have a good night!”

So, now the fate-given man was headed somewhere else, and Thomas was about to lose him—probably forever—if he didn’t act. So, obvious answer: he had to act. But he just… couldn’t. Not without a sign at least.

Not without a push.

When no push came, Thomas told himself it wouldn’t have led anywhere anyway. He continued about his day, with only the slightest added weight in his chest.

•••

“Aw, Virge, we have to do something about this one!”

Virgil looked up from his own paperwork to see the prayer Patton had pulled up.

“‘Please, God, let this somehow work out,’” he read out dryly. “Hm, not very specific.”

“Oh, but you didn’t—c’mon, look—“ Patton waved his hand to replay the video of the scene. The figures popped up on the screen, and Patton was reminded all over again of the dopey, flustered expression of the human, Thomas, as he failed so miserably at talking to his mall crush. It was such a silly, hopeful wish—Patton’s favorite kind—and he couldn’t bear to see it go unanswered.

His fellow angel did not share this opinion, evidentially. “Nope. Nuh-uh. No way,” Virgil said, “Love prayers are stupid as shit, hardest of all, never work out. If this whole department’s getting shut down, I’d rather spend my last week answering achievable prayers.”

Patton frowned. His brown-dappled wings drooped as his excitement wavered. “Is that right, though?” he asked, “Should we really stick to… what? Finding lost wallets? Delivering extra sandwiches? Like we’ve done every year of this job? If this is all ending, I wanna finally do something that matters, Virge.”

Virgil looked betrayed. “Lost wallets do matter, Patton. Maybe they don’t end droughts, or heal hearts, but that doesn’t mean they don’t matter. If people wish for it, it matters to them. I always thought you agreed with me on that.”

Patton bit his lip. He did agree with Virgil, on some level, and on any other day he would have considered his words more carefully. But with the prayer department set to close down this very week, he had lost some of his filter. Maybe his ideas were far-fetched, but when he had joined the Department of Answered Prayers he had been hoping to do exactly that--end droughts, heal hearts.

“Virgil’s right,” chimed in Logan. Their manager made his way over, and took Patton’s tablet from his hands. He swiped upwards on the prayer, officially dismissing it as ‘impossible.’ “There is no need to feel bad, Patton. It’s not our fault humans mainly ask for impossible things. If they want impossible, they need God, and God doesn’t have that kind of time. If they want an extra sandwich… we can pull a few strings.”

Logan nodded approvingly to where Virgil was coding breezes on his tablet, screen open to a view of a rural town avenue. He was carefully, cautiously, innocuously blowing leaves into piles one-by-one. This process eventually cleared the front yard of a small house, just in time for a kind-eyed, middle-aged man to come home and cheer at the sight of the finished chore. He even did a stupid little dance to himself, and Patton saw the smallest smile tug at Virgil’s lips.

“I agree with Patton,” came a voice from over by the mini fridge. Janus was doing what he did best: sipping at the canned wine he wasn’t meant to have, not doing any work, and giving his opinion on everything anyway. “Let’s do something interesting. It’s not like it matters at this point.”

“What do you mean?” Patton squinted at him.

“Cuz the prayer department’s getting shut down, duh, what else have we been talking about?” Virgil answered.

“No,” Janus said, “Well—yes, but… you know why we’re getting shut down, right?”

Patton and Virgil tilted their heads at him, and Logan looked away. A smile appeared on Janus’s face, but not one of joy. One that had an edge, a venom in it. “Logan… you didn’t tell them?”

“It would only upset them,” the management angel replied, still not meeting Janus’s eyes.

“Yeah, because they’ll not be upset at all when they see Earth randomly explode in a few days,” Janus deadpanned.

“What?!” Patton and Virgil exclaimed in simultaneous dismay.

Logan glared at Janus. “Are you happy? Now we have to deal with this for the next week.”

“Earth can’t explode yet,” Virgil said matter-of-factly, “that’s not right. Right?”

Patton nodded emphatically. “We should’ve gotten at least a century’s notice! Or had it on a public schedule somewhere!”

“Yeah, God has to call it off. At least for now,” Virgil agreed.

“You want God to stop it?” Janus said with a laugh. “He didn’t even remember it was happening; it was His PA who told the management staff.”

“Yes, it was,” Logan narrowed his eyes at Janus. “How did you find out about it anyway?”

Janus opened his mouth, but before he could answer, Virgil cut in, “God’s not gonna do anything about it?”

“It’s been in His plan. Why would He need to change it?” Logan asked rhetorically, adjusting his large, round-framed glasses as he did so. It was a movement he made often when he was being a know-it-all.

“How’s Earth gonna die?” Patton asked, looking at the floor, still in denial. He had lived his life on Earth, he had been a human—they all had, before they died and became angels. It had been so long since he’d been alive, he couldn’t quite remember the feeling of it. The memory was blurred around the edges, but it still seeped warmth, like dough burning into bread over a fire. Now, the only connection he had to that sensation were the humans--the chance to watch them, how they lived such utterly flawed, full lives. He recalled Thomas’s hopeful expression.

“Asteroid,” Logan replied. He didn’t need to check his files to give the answer, his ink-blue wings stiff behind him--and that was when Patton knew, despite his cold, indifferent attitude, this news was weighing on him too.

“Like the dinosaurs. Well, bigger. But still unoriginal of Him,” Janus scoffed, checking his nails—well, more like checking his gloves, which seemed unnecessary. Something mournful crossed his face for a moment, but Patton couldn’t place what. “The dinosaurs were sad too.”

“You lived in the 19th century. You weren’t around for dinosaurs,” Logan stated, brow furrowed in confusion. Janus ignored him.

“An asteroid? He could prevent that so easily! Earth deserves to at least live to its natural end,” Patton said. He glanced to Virgil, hoping for backup, but his coworker seemed most focused on biting his black-polished nails into dust.

“Well, isn’t it the natural end if it was in His plan?” Logan asked, once again, rhetorically. He also adjusted his glasses again. Patton liked to think of himself as particularly nice, even for an angel, but he wouldn’t have minded seeing those glasses broken in that moment.

“I’m more interested in your claim that Earth doesn’t ‘deserve’ to end,” Janus smiled at Patton. It was a slippery kind of smile, one that he couldn’t grasp the intentions of. “Overall, it’s a dumpster fire of a planet, wouldn’t you agree? I mean, 99% of the prayers are literally impossible for angels to answer at this point.”

“Yeah, well, I know some angels who are too busy with their shitty wine to even try—“ Virgil began to complain, turning on Janus, but Patton was too busy having a revelation to pay much attention to it.

“That’s it!” Patton exclaimed, jumping up from his seat with a grin.

“Please, be more specific, Patton,” Logan sighed. “Define ‘it.’”

Patton was, once again, too busy to pay attention to this. He made for the doorway with haste, only tossing over his shoulder: “I’m going to meet God!”

•••

Logan, Janus, and Virgil made it to God’s office before Patton did. He wasn’t the best with maps, so sue him. The trio was waiting in the grand hallway for him, and he was thankful that they had decided to back him up, despite the fact they had no idea what he was doing. Even though the coworkers bickered their fair share, you couldn’t work as the only 4 angels in a crumbling department without a certain bond forming.

Patton gave them a grateful smile as he strolled past them and right up to the secretary’s desk. The secretary, who was… not present? He checked the name plaque. Engraved in the gold of it was: Mrs. Snuffles, but the ‘u’ had been scratched out and written over so that it was Mrs. Sniffles. Before Patton could even begin to be perplexed by this, a large orange tabby hopped up from the floor, where she had been hidden, and onto the desk.

The cat looked him in the eye, with a surprising amount of purpose, and meowed.

“Hello?” Patton asked, dumbfounded. “...Mrs. Sni—Snuffles?”

She meowed again, this time with an undercurrent of what Patton could only assume was impatience.

“I—“ Patton looked back at the group behind him, but they just shrugged. They were following his lead. That couldn’t be good. “We would like to schedule a meeting with God, please.”

Mrs. Snuffles trotted over to a stack of papers, and pushed the top one aside with a swipe of her paw. She looked up from it after a moment, and then jumped down from the table, going up to the gilded, arched doorway at the end of the hall. She started meowing loudly, and soon an angel with cardinal-red wings and a matching red suit jacket stepped out. He looked down at Mrs. Snuffles, then up at Patton.

“I’m terribly sorry, but God is not available right now. He’s very busy,” the angel explained with a polite smile, the kind that was trained and not felt, “and he will be until Earth explodes. Thank you, goodbye.”

“Oh,” Patton said dumbly. He maybe should have expected that.

Mrs. Snuffles hissed at the angel, and he sighed. “You really think they want to talk to Him?”

“We do!” Patton interjected.

“You think you do,” the angel replied, an undercurrent of bitterness to his tone.

“Same difference, right?” Patton said, giving the other a hopeful smile.

“Just let us in, Princey,” Virgil’s annoyed voice came from behind. “Don’t be an ass. At least not more of one than usual.”

Patton looked between the two of them. “You know each other?”

‘Princey’ gave Virgil a deadpan glare. “Fine. You want a meeting with God? Be my guest.” He stepped aside from the doorway, gesturing to it with a sarcastic flourish.

When no one else made a move, Virgil grumbled and pushed past Patton. The rest of the group followed. When they got to the door, Patton paused and turned to the red-winged man. “Princey—“

“Roman,” he corrected.

“Roman,” Patton repeated. He pointed at the cat curiously, “Mrs. ‘Sniffles’?”

Roman blushed. “I was allergic when I was alive.”

A resounding reply of “Me too!” went through the group, and they all turned to each other in mild surprise.

“It’s how I died!” Patton added cheerily.

“Huh,” Roman replied with a puzzled frown. He cleared his throat. “Well, good luck.”

“Thank you!” Patton said. He looked down at Mrs. Snuffles as well, “Thank you, too.”

She gave him a final, curt meow, and rubbed up to his legs, pushing his feet against the door. He laughed, turned to the others waiting for him, and they nodded. Roman opened the door, and gestured them in.

Patton didn’t know what he had expected God’s office to look like, but it was decidedly not what he found upon entering that door. He had expected something resembling the grand hallway leading up to it: golden statues, velvet carpet, ivory columns. And, sure, that seemed to be the basis of the office; it was everything that was added on that was surprising. The bookshelves were stacked exclusively with trashy magazines, the walls were covered in posters of boy bands and movie stars, and a side-room had been renovated into what appeared to be a personal Starbucks. Finally, in the center of it all, sitting on the sofa and watching TV, was:

“...God?” Patton asked unsurely.

The man--(should Patton call Him that?)--eyed the group from behind a pair of sunglasses. He didn’t bother to turn the TV off as He casually greeted, “Hey, babes! What’s up?”

“Um,” Patton glanced at his friends for help, but they were clearly just as lost as him. Well, not Janus; Janus seemed unbothered. This provided Patton some sense of comfort, enough for him to continue, “We wanted to ask about--”

“Hold that thought, hun,” God held up a finger. “Roman!”

Roman walked in, almost reluctantly, at the call. “Yes?”

“Be a peach and mute the TV, would you?” God asked, throwing His PA the remote. Roman caught it as if with practice, and pressed the mute button with a wry expression.

“Thanks, love you!” God said, then turned back to Patton. “What were we talking about?”

“Well--”

God tried to sip the frappe in His drink-holder, only to find it empty, and He interrupted again to say, “Roman, coffee alert! Mama needs His caffeine!”

Roman bit his lip, presumably to stop himself from letting out a sigh. When he walked to the Starbucks corner, he seemed to purposefully avoid eye contact with the group. Patton glanced at his friends, and found Virgil suppressing an amused grin, and Janus not bothering to suppress his.

“We wanted to ask about the end of the world,” Patton finally said.

God’s brow furrowed slightly. “End of the world? Oh! OH, that is coming up, isn’t it? When’s that again, Ro?”

Roman, from behind the coffee maker, replied, “7 and a half days.”

“Oo, fun!” God gasped, “That’s so soon! I totally forgot that was so soon, isn’t that crazy?”

“So crazy,” Roman agreed dryly, handing Him a new venti frappe.

“Right,” Patton said, almost at a loss, “So, you… want the world to end?”

God shrugged, using one finger to play with his coffee straw as he spoke. “It was in my plan, wasn’t it? Plus, I mean, y’know… Earth’s really, like, ‘ew’ right now, right? Like, sure, I COULD save it, and then I’d let the humans keep doing their little thing, but I don’t want that; they’re mostly messes. I wanna make… I dunno a new place with, like, more Idris Elba’s.”

“And you’re willing to kill the real Idris Elba for that?” Janus cut in. God looked him up and down critically, before asking,

“Hey, do I know you from something?”

“No,” Janus replied quickly, “Certainly not from Eden, and even if I was there, I wasn’t the snake. I’m a real angel, hush.”

Patton turned to him in confusion, but God just shrugged again, and said, “K, whatever. Anyway, yeah, what’d you gals wanna know about Earth again?”

“Um, we wanted you to, maybe… not… blow it up?” Patton asked.

“Hmm,” God hummed, “Thanks, but no thanks! Earth is gross, I’m just so over it, you know?”

“No, I don’t know,” Patton replied without thinking, unable to hide the frustration in his voice anymore, “If Earth’s messed up, all the more reason to be there for your children, and not just kill everything. It’s wrong.”

There was a ‘thunk’ against the floor, and Patton looked to see that Roman had dropped the old coffee cup he had been carrying to the trash. Logan and Virgil were staring at Patton with equally stricken expressions, and Janus’s face was unreadable. He suddenly realized what he had said. He then realized how many angels had fallen for saying much less.

God stood up slowly. He approached Patton until He was uncomfortably close.

 “Awe,” He pouted, “babe, I know it’ll be sad, but how am I supposed to change it now? It’s in the plan, hun. I’m sure you understand.” He patted his cheek once condescendingly--a touch that carried the pleasant warmth of a sunbeam--before He stepped back and took a long sip of His coffee. Patton didn’t break eye contact the whole time.

“I have an idea,” Patton said in a newly sunny tone--the type of overly kind, conversational tone that should be feared-- “How about a bet?”

“Are you for real?” God gaped at the continued insolence, somewhere between disbelief and delight. In the end, delight--or at least novelty--won. “Deal with the Devil is out, deal with God is in; OK, I’m into it!”

“You say it’s too hard to save Earth now? Impossible, even?” Patton asked challengingly. He heard a quiet gasp of realization from Logan, and when he glanced behind himself, he noticed Janus was smiling, as if impressed. This gave him enough confidence to continue, “Impossible, like it would be impossible for a few random angels to answer an unanswerable prayer?”

“Sweetie, I don’t know what you’re saying, but I love the way you’re saying it,” God waved His hand appreciatively.

Patton took Logan’s tablet from his hands. He scrolled to find the ‘Discarded Prayers: Impossible’ file. He held it out to God for proof as he concluded, “If we can answer one of these prayers before the end of the world, surely you can stop it from ending.”

“THAT’S your plan?! Pat, we can’t complete the possible prayers half the time,” Virgil exclaimed. He buried his face in his hands. “Earth’s dead.”

God, however, let out a dreamy sigh, holding one hand against His chest. Patton wasn’t sure if he was meant to feel like the ambitious hero or the prize dog at a pet show. “You know, I should say no…” God bit his lip with the same expression a suburban mother might have when she was about to cheat on her juice cleanse, “...but I never could resist a little twist! Ok, shake on it!”

God extended His hand, and Patton took it without hesitation.

“I, God, proclaim: Earth will not be destroyed next week if, and only if, an impossible prayer is answered.” As He spoke, His palm began to glow white, such that Patton had to look away for fear of being blinded. If God’s touch had been a sunbeam previously, it was now the whole sun, and Patton almost cried out from the burning heat. Technically, he didn’t have skin in the same way he did when he was alive, but he swore he felt it melting off in that grip.

Yet when God pulled away, there was no extra light in the room, no damage to his hand.

God smiled innocently. “Ok! Cute! So, what prayer you gonna choose?”

Huh. Patton hadn’t thought that far ahead. Maybe Virgil’s concern wasn’t so unwarranted. He looked down at the tablet he was still holding. His eyes scanned past several prayers that were beyond impossible--fix capitalism, no more YouTube ads, fix global warming, no more incels--until his eyes caught on just the thing. An unabashed grin overtook Patton’s face in realization,

“Oh, I know exactly what prayer we’re doing.”

•••

“Well, have a good night!”

Nico turned his back on the cute mall man after he said it, and he had to push down the urge to glance back a final time. He tried not to believe in true love—it was at best unlikely, and at worst an extremely problematic trope—but he was a writer, and a daydreamer, and when he spotted the man a few tables down at the food court… he just knew.

Ok, he didn’t know, there was no way to know that kind of thing—but he did want. He did hope. And he did, in a move that was unprecedented for him, pray:

Please, if anyone’s up there: I know it’s silly, but I want this so badly. And I know it’s basically impossible at this point but, maybe… if we meet again... let this somehow work out?

[lucifers-favorite-pen]

Unfinished Lessons

Fandom: Obey me

Genre: Angst, so much angst

Pairings: Lucifer x Blair

Word Count: ~2.8k

Warnings: Mention of death, lots of sadness, lots of angst

I would just like to apologize in advance for any small errors in this writing. I literally could not to a thorough edit because reading it again made me so genuinely sad. Get a box of tissues. You have been warned.

-------------------

Context: Blair was taken from the HoL about a year ago, and was presumed dead. This broke everyone’s heart, but it broke her husband, Lucifer’s, the most. He didn’t know how to exist without her. He buried himself in his work, and in bottles, and wouldn’t let anyone console him. Not even Diavolo. When he finally was starting to learn how to be a person again, she shows back up, in chains due to trying to break into HoL, and has no recollection of him. Her once beautiful, warm black hair was a stark white, and her face looked like she had been modified slightly, like someone had tweaked the sliders in the character creation section of one of Leviathan’s RPGs. Either way, she wasn’t his wife. She was a poorly made copy of her sent here to torment him, to remind him of how he broke the vow he took to protect her when he married her.

Of course they kept her there, to interrogate her about Faerie and the people she was working for. Specifically why she was sent back to the Devildom in the first place. She was confused, and refused to believe she was who they were saying she was, and was extremely hostile.

Over the course of a month, she started to put some pieces together.

-Beel crying while pointing at a picture of him walking her down the aisle on her wedding day, begging her to believe him and to remember.

-Belphie showing her a video of their game of extreme chicken, pointing to Blair sitting triumphantly on Beel’s shoulders in knee and elbow pads as they both celebrated their victory.

-Asmo showing her her wedding dress, and gushing over how much he loved the way she looked and how well he did her hair and make up.

It was all too much evidence pointing to one conclusion. She felt a gnawing inside her chest everyday, like something was begging to be noticed, but she didn’t know what. She didn’t understand what she was feeling, sadness? Anxiety? Uncertainty? She had never felt anything but devotion and determination. How had she gone 25 years feeling only those two feelings?

She decided to go see Lucifer, the man who had been avoiding her like the plague. The man who was supposedly her husband while she was human. She had questions that she somehow knew only he could answer. She was determined to get to the bottom of this.

---------------

It was pretty late, but she couldn’t sleep. Her brain was going a million miles a minute with everything she had learned in the past month, and she needed to speak with him. She shrugged on a cardigan and padded down to his room, hearing a soft classical strings melody from the inside. She knocked timidly twice.

Lucifer knew who it was. That was how she knocked on his door when she first came to the Devildom, and how she knocked on his door everyday after that. Old habits die hard, apparently.

He sighed, filling his wine glass, “Come in,”.

Blair poked her head in and looked at him, making sure it was ok to come in. He glanced up at her from his work, not being able to look at her more than that, and asked in monotone, “What could you possibly need from me at this hour?”.

She hesitantly steps into the room, recognizing the music as Chopin’s Piano Concerto in E minor, specifically the second movement. She didn’t know how she knew that, as she had never heard it before, but she shook it off.

“I couldn’t sleep,” she mutters as she slowly steps toward him. Lucifer couldn’t help but crack a small smile at that. Blair didn’t sleep well her first couple months in the Devildom either. She had trouble adjusting to a new space, it seems that trait didn’t die with her either.

“And what do you expect me to do about that? Belphegor is the Avatar of Sloth, go bother him,” he says harshly, trying to get her to leave.

Blair stands her ground, and holds her head a little higher, “I just had some questions,”.

“About what?” he snaps.

“You know what,” she retorts, just as harsh. If this was what it was going to take to get what she needed, then that was that. She tried to be gentle, seeing as his brothers warned her that he was a wreck, but she wasn’t going to let him bully her into leaving.

Lucifer sighs, dropping his pen on the page and rubbing his hands over his face. He looked exhausted. She noted the dark circles beginning to form under his eyes, and the messiness of his hair. She noticed how his shirt was wrinkled, the tie was crooked, and noted the slight tremor in his hand as he brought the glass of wine to his lips. He gestured his hand out to her, silently telling her to ask away.

She looked around the room a bit before asking. Honestly, she didn’t think she would make it this far, and didn’t even know where to begin. Though, her eyes catch on a large framed painting hanging above his bed. It depicted him in a pressed tuxedo and a tail coat, sitting in a red velvet chair. On his knee sat a woman, with warm black hair, and icy blue eyes. She wore a magnificent black dress that hugged every curve perfectly with a train so long it couldn’t fit in the painting. They both looked at each other with a look of adoration and passion she hadn’t seen before. The way her hand brushed his cheek, and the way his hand held that hand so tenderly. The way his other hand came to hold her chin, and the slight curvature of his lips. It all was… familiar? The scene made her chest hurt in a way she didn’t understand.

“Is that us?” she asks, smiling and pointing to the painting. Lucifer turns to look at it as well, leaning his face on his chin as he stared.

“No,” he says, not looking at her. Her eyebrows furrow together, and she shakes her head. “But-”

“That is my wife and I on our wedding day. I had that portrait commissioned so I could capture her like that for the rest of my days. However, she wouldn't agree to be painted unless I also was in the portrait. I’m glad she insisted, I rather like how it turned out,” he says, a longing in his tone he was too tired to mask as he stared at the painting.

“But I thought-”

“You are not her. You are a pathetic excuse of a copy of her. Your cheekbones are too pronounced, your chin is too pointy, your ears are pointy, your nose is too small, and your hair-” he cuts himself off to sigh and take another swig of his beverage. His words bite at her heart and she feels an unfamiliar pressure building behind her eyes. What was going on with her?

“It’s like they tried to perfect perfection,” he mutters to himself, dragging his eyes away from the portrait and back to his glass. He manages to meet her gaze, cutting more daggers into her soul with his crimson eyes. “My wife is dead. You are not her, and you will never be her. You are a husk of the woman she was sent to torment me. A punishment for my failure to her as a husband by my father, I’m sure” he spits at her. He pours himself another glass and takes a gulp of the liquid, still staring at her even though looking at her makes his heart break all over again. He watches her look at her feet and start to pick at her nails, a tell tale sign she was nervous. She still had all the little mannerisms he studied while he was falling in love with her. She still tucked a strand of hair behind her ear when she read. She still held pencils and pens wrong, and twirled them through her fingers while she was deep in thought. She still ate all the different types of food on her plate one at a time. This was her, but it just wasn’t. He would rather fall a thousand more times, than see her like this.

“I, um, I still had one more question,” she says quietly, barely looking up to meet his gaze. He groans loudly in response, and yells, “What?!”. She flinches at his tone, an action she doesn’t remember ever doing up until this moment. He instantly regrets it, but refuses to look like he does, or to apologize for it.

“I was wondering if you could tell me the name of a piano piece? I’ve been wracking my brain trying to remember the name, and your brothers said you were familiar with classical music. I thought I’d ask,” she says, her tone small as she tried not to anger him. He sighed and rested his chin in his hand.

“I will do my best,” he says.

She nods and mutters, “Thank you,” before turning to go sit at the piano. She begins pressing keys, and he knows by the fourth note that it’s the first movement of Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata. He doesn’t have the energy to stop her though, he lets her play, each note feeling like a lash on his heart.

She’s playing it well, but there’s no emotion. It’s like a robot was playing it, and he knew it was because she was incapable of feeling the emotions being conveyed in the piece. That fact stung more than he thought it would.

She got about two minutes into the piece before she stopped abruptly, taking her hands off the keys and placing them in her lap. “That’s all I know of it. I’ve never been taught how to play, I don’t even know how to read music, but I know how to play this, and I don’t know what it is. Any ideas?” she says, finally looking over at him. He had his eyes closed, and his chin was cradled in his hands. She felt an ache in her chest when she saw the shine of a single tear that had rolled down his face. He slowly opened his eyes and stared at a point in front of him that wasn’t her, before rubbing his face again and standing up from his desk. He moved silently over to a file cabinet against the wall and looked through it for a minute, before sliding out a thin book. Lucifer looked at it, and sighed quietly before moving over to the piano. Blair shifted to the side to make room for him on the bench, which he sat elegantly on as he flipped through the book. When he got to the page he needed, he set the book on the stand, took a deep breath to steady himself, and began playing.

Blair could tell he was playing the rest of the piece for her. She watched intently as his fingers glided expertly over the keys, and watched his face twist into a look of what can only be described as agony held back by sheer will power. His jaw was clenched and his eyebrows were knitted together, creating a dark storm in his eyes. He swore to himself he would never listen to this piece again. Not after what it meant to him. And here he was, playing it as if it didn’t make him feel like his chest was about explode.

He finished the piece, and heaved a great sigh of relief, the look washing away from his face and relaxing back into exhaustion. Lucifer stares at his hands for a second before saying, “The piece you were playing was the first movement of Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata. I just played you the rest of it,”.

He pauses briefly, still not looking at her, “The reason you can play it without knowing how to read music, is due to muscle memory. I was teaching Blair this piece, though I begged her to let me teach her something less mainstream, nevertheless she insisted on learning it, and she practiced it diligently,”. A small, sad smile crawls across his lips as he says that, but it’s gone as soon as it appears.

“You can’t play the last third of the piece because,” he pauses, taking a shaky breath to steady himself as he feels the familiar knot form in his throat and heat behind his eyes. Feelings he experienced for the first time the night he proposed to her. The thought felt like a punch to the gut.

“Because I was unable to finish teaching it to her before-” he cuts himself off. He clenches his fists and jaw, shutting his eyes. He felt like his chest was going to cave in at the memories of their lessons. The image of her having finished playing what he had assigned her to work on, and looking up at him with hopeful eyes seared its way into his memories. Another image of the cute, frustrated little quirk in her brow when her fingers just wouldn’t move the way she wanted them to stabbed like a dagger in his heart.

A quick clear of this throat and another deep breath brought him back to some stable ground. He looked over at Blair, to see her eyes already on him. They were wet, and brimming with tears. Finding out what she knows now solidified that the stories she had been told, the horror of what happened to her was all true. Here sat in front of her was her husband, yet she knew nothing of the love and adoration gifted to the woman in the painting. She felt the hot tears spill down her face at the gaping hole that was just ripped through her chest.

She felt robbed.

She felt robbed of the opportunity to be a wife, to be his wife. She felt robbed of the opportunity of love and to be loved as much as the people in the painting loved each other. She felt robbed of the possibility of building a family with him. She felt robbed of the memories, and the feelings, of everything. They took everything from her. She envied the woman in the portrait to the point of anger, and to know it was once her, and to know he will never look at her like that, only made her angry.

Lucifer, as if on instinct alone, caught one of the tears falling down her face with his finger, and tucked her hair behind her painfully unfamiliar pointed ear. He cupped her face in his hands and used his thumbs to wipe away the wetness gathering under her eyes as he looked into them for the first time since the last time he saw them.

They were the same.

The same eyes he looked into when he told her he loved her for the first time. The same pools of sky blue he could look into and feel at peace whenever he was stressed. The same eyes he stared into when they stood at an altar while he promised no harm would ever become of her.

The same eyes that held sheer terror as she screamed out for him while he was frozen in place by unfamiliar magic; helpless as he watched them carrying her kicking and screaming far away from him, never to see her again.

He was unable to hold back the tears streaming down his face as he stared into his wife’s perfect, baby blue orbs.

“At least, they kept your eyes, darling” he whispered.

As if also on instinct, she brought her hands to meet his and leaned closer up to his face, like she had done many times before in a past life. He also leaned closer, wanting to feel her lips on his, just one last time, but was unable to shake the gut wrenching feeling of someone else’s hands over his, and how her face no longer fit perfectly in his cupped hands.

“No,” he whispered painfully against her lips. He rips himself away from her and strides over to brace himself against a wall. She is left breathless and empty at his sudden absence, and looks over to him. She opens her mouth to apologize.

“Please leave,” is all he says with his back turned to her. She’s frozen, unable to move as a whirlwind of emotions takes over her ability to move. Everything in her body screamed at her to hold him, to tell him everything was going to be ok. Her heart begged her to cling to the body of this stranger who wanted nothing to do with her like it was the mast of a sinking ship.

“Please, Blair” he says, his voice cracking as he says her name to her for the first time since she’s been there. This was enough to bring her out of it. She stands up and walks quickly towards the door. As she opens it, she looks back at him one last time, able to see the side of his face now. His jaw is set, his mouth is set in a straight line, but rivers of tears fall from his eyes and on to the floor beneath him. She turns, and exists through the door, shutting it softly behind her.

----------

Bonus Text Thread!

Blair: I want to fix this. I’m going to talk to Solomon and Satan tomorrow and gather all of the resources regarding Fae magic the Devildom has. If that isn’t enough, we’ll search the other realms as well. But I can’t do this without you, I need your help.

Blair: Please Lucifer, help me take back what they stole from me. From you. From us. Please.

Lucifer: What do you think I’ve been doing for the passed two years? We’ve exhausted all of our resources and then some trying to get you back. Even after you died, Barbatos and I tried for months after I felt our pact snap to try to get into Faerie to bring your body home. There is no hope for us, Blair. I’m sorry, go to sleep.

Blair: There has to be a way! The magic that was used to create me was said to be impossible, but here I am! None of you are familiar with Fae magic, I am. I haven’t had a chance to look over any materials, or try any spells on myself! Look, you can sit there and drink yourself into a stupor, mourning your dead wife for the rest of eternity if you really want to. I am going to do whatever it takes to get my fucking life back, and I’ll do it with or without you. So you can either help me move the process along, or you can stand idly by and suffer some more. It’s your choice.  

Lucifer: ...There might be something. It’s a long shot, but it’s something. Meet me in the royal library tomorrow at 5:00. Bring Satan, and Solomon.

Lucifer: Thank you, Blair.

Masterpost

[alexiessan]

Never alone - Chapter Ten - Soulmate AU

AO3

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Thank you guys so much for your reaction to the last chapter, I’m so happy you liked it :) I love getting your thoughts on the chapters! 

The trip back to France was as tiring as the trip to Gotham was. It was like they had traveled a few hours to the future when they finally landed. It was after saying goodbye to her friends and settling back at home that she was grateful that they arrived on a Saturday. It meant she could use the next day to rest before starting school again on Monday.

The very first thing she did when she got back home, besides hugging her parents as tight as she could, was to put back the horse miraculous in the miracle box. She didn’t have to use it at all during the class trip in Gotham as Hawkmoth has been unnaturally calm for two weeks.

She didn’t want to think about how Gabriel Agreste was out of the country during those two weeks and would be for another two weeks. It was too much of a coincidence for her, but Chat Noir would tell her that Gabriel Agreste has been akumatized and couldn’t be Hawkmoth.

She knew that, and that was the entire reason was the man has been crossed off their list of suspects. But even after his akumatization, there was still a little part of her, deep down, that was suspicious of Adrien’s father.

And Hawkmoth’s silence while the head of the Agreste brand was absent from Paris didn’t help in her suspicions. She hoped that she was just paranoid and that Gabriel Agreste was innocent — or, well, as innocent as a man abusing his own son can be. Something must be done about this too — because if he wasn’t, this would break Adrien.

But Chat Noir didn’t suspect the man at all, and it was all it took for her to not insist too much. For whatever reason, that particular subject was very delicate for her partner, and he had once snapped at her for bringing it up. She chose to trust his instincts and didn’t bring it up anymore.

Chat Noir was her equal, after all. They were a team, not a hero and her side-kick, so she had to take his opinion into consideration.

But that meant that they didn’t have any suspect anymore. And they were no detective. They were just teenagers, and the police constantly reminded them of this fact when they asked for their help tracking the terrorist down.

She understood that they had other matters to attend, but an adult taking advantage of the people of Paris to attack the city was an important matter too, wasn’t it?

But apparently, that was the heroes’ job, since it involved miraculous…

Marinette was scared that they wouldn’t be skilled enough to bring the man down. Robin was right: she needed to learn how to fight properly if she wanted them to have a chance in this fight. She doubted that Hawkmoth would just give up his miraculous the day they find him and confront him. No, there would be one hell of a fight, that’s for sure.

Speaking of Chat Noir, she would have to tell him about her finding her soulmate. That’s a conversation that she didn’t want to have. Chat still had feelings for her, he made that clear with the way he was looking at her, and he was convinced that they were soulmates. That the miraculous was hiding that fact.

That’s a conversation that she really didn’t want to have. Her partner would end up hurt, and in his own pain, would hurt her in return.

She knew him. He didn’t mean it, but when he was hurt, he would snap at her and blame her.

She never held it against him, though. While before, he wouldn’t apologize when it happened, ever since their serious conversation, he would own up his mistakes and apologize to her afterward.

But the conversation still wouldn’t be pleasant.

Sighing, she told herself that it was a problem for future Marinette, and right now, she wanted to sleep. She took her phone out, sending a text to Robin to tell her that she was back in Paris safe and sound, that she hoped he was ok and had a good day and wished him good night.

It was still only six in the evening, but she knew she would sleep until the morning.

Without anything else to worry about, she told her parents and then Tikki good night, and was out as soon as her head hit her pillow.

Sunday passed quickly for Marinette. She did some research on the internet for martial art classes and found some that could fit in her schedule. She thought about telling Chat about it, so he could maybe take some too. She wasn’t very hopeful about it, though, as she knew that the boy has a very full schedule. Plus, he knew how to fence, so maybe it would be enough for him.

She also got to video call Robin, and they talked for an hour or so. It was the middle of the night for him and she felt guilty to keep him up like this but he waved her concerns away. He told her that he usually went to sleep late anyway, and it was a weekend day.

They agreed that they would call once a week during the weekend, so it wouldn’t interfere with either of their sleep schedules. They both needed to be well-rested with their extracurricular activities.

She was happy that she got to see him — even if it was only in video — but she couldn’t help but feel his absence. She could already tell that it was going to be tough for her to be away from him like that.

And they had only known each other for two weeks.

For all she loved this whole soulmate thing, she also hated it for making her long for Robin like that.

Hopefully, she would get used to the distance and it would get less and less bad with time.

After this call, she used the day to make a plan for her paper about her internship. She had to submit it to Ms. Bustier on Friday, which gave her a lot of time, but she would rather finish it as soon as possible.

Surprised Akuma attacks taught her not to do her work at the last minute. She can’t remember the number of times back in middle school that she submitted an essay late because of an Akuma attack.

She even got to write the introduction and the first part of her paper!

Proud of herself, she ate a nice dinner with her parents and related everything about her trip to Gotham. She also told them about the martial art classes that she wanted to take, and they agreed with her, worried about the Akumas that were becoming more and more violent.

Knowing that their daughter would know how to defend herself, they could worry a little bit less when she was out.

But, she was their daughter. They would always worry about her anyway.

After Marinette’s class went back to Paris, Bruce — in his Batman alias — decided to organize a meeting in the Tower about the situation in Paris.

It was decided in this meeting that they would do anything to get the Justice League of Europe to get them to agree to let the JLA send one or two of their heroes — or vigilantes — to help Ladybug and Chat Noir.

They couldn’t possibly let two teenagers alone just because the JLE couldn’t be bothered to help them.

Batman knew that the JLE would fight tooth and nail against them, but he wouldn’t back off. A city was literally taken hostage and they didn’t do anything about it.

To say that the Justice League of America was pissed was an understatement.

At the end of his classes on Monday, Damian went to the guidance counselor’s office, decided to talk with him about the French exchange program.

The young Wayne’s school offered an exchange for the last year of school in different pays. One of them was France. Very few students ever did it, though. The school curriculums being different in the two countries, upon return, the student had to take a test. If you passed, then it was good and you could graduate with your class. If you didn’t pass, you would have to repeat the year.

No one wanted to take the risk to repeat the year, so very few students ever got in this program.

Damian was a very confidant teenager with perfect marks, so he knew he could get into the exchange program without having to repeat his last year of high school.

When he entered the office after knocking, the counselor was very surprised to see him.

“Mr. Wayne! What a surprise! If I knew I would see you besides the mandatory hours…”

The student threw a glare at the man’s way, making him freeze in his seat.

“Uh… Alright… What can I do for you, Mr. Wayne?”

“I would like to enroll in a student exchange program for my last year.”

The counselor raised an eyebrow at that.

“You’ve never expressed an interest in it before.”

“Well, now I do.”

Cold as ever, the man thought, slightly sweating.

“Fine. What country are you interested in?”

“France.”

The older man stared at him for a little while, and then took a file out of his desk when he realized that the son of Bruce Wayne wouldn’t offer any explanations.

“Do you have some basics in French.”

Damian scoffed.

“I’m fluent.”

The counselor — Mr. Tyler — stood up and make his way to the copy machine behind him.

After the copy was made, he handed him a sheet of paper and a form.

“Ok, here is the list of schools that are included in our exchange program, the cities they are in, and their contact information if you need to know more. And here is the form that you have to submit to me before the end of the year. It would need your and your legal guardian’s signature. There will also be a test when-”

“I know that already.”

“Alright, then. That’s all. Have a good evening Mr. Wayne.”

Damian didn’t even wait for Mr. Tyler to finish his sentence before he was out of the office.

Ladybug winced as she got hit on her left side. Three months since they got back from Gotham — it was now August and almost the end of the summer break — and the Akumas has been attacking twice a week for a month now.

This one was strong, too. It was a boxer who has lost an important match for their career and Hawkmoth took advantage of his wrath.

She was happy that she took the martial art classes because she was better at evading him and attacking him, but the guy was a professional and she was still an amateur.

Chat Noir was fairing pretty well too, considering he didn’t take classes like her. Just as she had thought, his schedule was too full to add anything else, and he told her that he was already taking fencing classes.

In the three months since their return to France, Ladybug still hasn’t told him about her soulmate. She had tried, several times, but every time she lost the courage to tell him.

She was so scared of losing him.

It was irrational, she knew, Chat Noir was her partner, and he told her that he would always be her friend and all, but there was still this lingering fear that prevented her to tell him.

Tikki has scolded her every single time she got cold feet.

She hated it when her kwami scolded her. It always made her feel like she was a little girl.

She must have gotten a little too lost in her thought because she didn’t see the next hit coming.

It came right on her left cheekbone, making her gasp in pain. She also felt her eye sting, making it tear up.

“Ladybug!”

In seconds, Chat Noir had kicked the Akuma away, taking her face in his hand.

“Ladybug, are you ok? Are you hu- Your… Your eye… It’s green.”

The spotted hero froze. The sting in her eye must have been her contact falling.

She could feel the panic rise. This was not how she wanted Chat to find out.

“Later, Chat. I’ll explain that after the fight.”

He nodded, but she could see that he was tensed.

After that, more determined than before to end the fight, they found the akumatized item, destroyed it, and Ladybug could finally cast the Miraculous Cure.

Which, thankfully, put her contact back on.

“Ladybug…”

She looked at her partner, who was even tenser than before.

“Let’s recharge and meet at the usual spot. Five minutes won’t be enough for this conversation.”

Chat nodded and disappeared to recharge.

Ladybug found a safe place and detransformed, handing a macaron to Tikki, who was scowling at her.

“See, Marinette? I told you to tell him! But no! You were too scared and look where we are! Chat Noir is not stupid, he knows exactly what your eye means, and now he will think that you don’t respect him enough to tell him that you found your soulmate!”

“I know, Tikki! I. Know.” she snapped.

The little kwami glared at her before eating a bit of her macaron.

Marinette sighed, rubbing her face.

“I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like this. I know that I should have told Chat Noir waaaaaaay before now. I know. He will probably hate me now, and I don’t blame him. Whatever happens next is my fault.”

Tikki sighed and swallowed the last bit of the sweet.

“I’m sorry too, Marinette. I shouldn’t have been pressuring you like that. Yes, you had to tell him, but it should have been on your own terms, and at your pace, not mine. With Chat Noir’s previous behavior, I get why you’re scared about telling him. But, I think it’s going to be ok.” she flew to her chosen’s face, putting her little hand — paw? — on the designer’s cheek. “You and Chat Noir make a good team. He may brood for a while, but he will always be by your side.”

Marinette nodded, eyes a little glassy.

“You’re right.” she took a deep breath. “Tikki, spots on!”

When Ladybug made it to their usual spot, Chat Noir was already here. His back was facing her, and the red-clothed hero could hear her own heartbeat. She was so nervous that she could feel knots in her stomach, and she thought for a moment that she was going to empty it right here.

It took her a moment and taking a few deep breaths to calm her nerves enough to call her partner.

“Chat.”

Finally, he turned, looking at her right in the eyes. He didn’t say anything, waiting for her explanations.

She couldn’t look at him in the eyes any longer, so she chose to look past his shoulder.

“Chat… I met my soulmate.”

He was silent for a moment, and his pained expression was like a knife in the guts.

“When did you meet him?”

She wanted to tell him that it didn’t matter, but she couldn’t lie to him any longer.

She wanted to laugh. She had hated Lila because she was a liar, and here she was, lying to her own partner for three months. She was no better than Rossi.

“I met him three months ago.”

“And you only tell me now?!” he yelled. “No, you didn’t even tell me. I had to find out because you lost your fucking contact!”

She flinched at his voice. She knew that he would react like that.

“I’m so sorry Chat. I’ve been trying to tell you. Every time we saw each other I tried. But I was so scared of your reaction.”

He looked at her with such hateful eyes she wanted to cry. But then, his eyes and his expression softened.

“Ok. I get it. I get why you were scared. You probably didn’t want to hurt me more than your rejections ever did.”

She nodded.

The cat-themed hero let out a laugh, but it didn’t have any joy in it.

“And here I was, firmly believing you and I were soulmates… You told me again and again that it was how it worked, that we would know already if we were… But did I listen? No.”

He shook his head.

“If anything, I’m the one that was hurting myself all this time. I’ve really got tunnel vision with you, Ladybug.”

He tapped her hand, giving her a small smile.

“I’m sorry I yelled at you. I… I’ll be fine. I think. It will take time, but I’ll be fine.”

He hugged her and she hugged him back tightly.

“I’ll see you later, then.”

And then, he disappeared.

That night, when she got a video call from Robin, she was on the verge of tears. Relieved that this secret was finally out — for at least one person, it killed her to have another big secret to keep from her friends and family — and worried about her partner.

Robin’s bluntness about her tears actually made her laugh and made her forget for a moment.

Marinette smiled as Robin told her something stupid that Red Hood did on their last patrol.

And she thought, then, that Chat and she would be alright.

Tag List:

@bigpicklebananatree​ @animegirlweeb​ @crazylittlemunchkin​ @northernbluetongue​ @cutechip​ @justafanwarrior​ @iloontjeboontje​ @resignedcatservant​ @maribat-is-lifeblood​ @i-like-fairytail-and-stuff​ @toodaloo-kangaroo​ @mikantsume​ @dast218​ @amayakans​ @zestyzealot​ @lunarwolfspn​ @corabeth11​ @marinettepotterandplagg​

[purplesurveys]

1193

Have you ever been cheated on?  Nope.

Whose car were you last in?  Other than my own? Hans’s, but that was over two months ago. 

Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?  How timely is this, Andi literally randomly asked me how I feel about septum piercings this afternoon haha. Anyway, I have no problem with it on other people but I personally wouldn’t pick my nose as a spot for piercings.

Have your parents ever smoked pot?  I don’t know, they may have but there’s a big chance they haven’t. They don’t really share much about their youth so I would never know.

Do you tend to make relationships complicated?  That’s definitely not me.

Are you good at giving directions?  Not at all; if anyone asks me directly I usually immediately refer them to whoever I’m with at the time. Or I tell them to check Waze.

Would your mom care if she found condoms in your room?  She would and she’d definitely be pissed about it. Not that I have to worry about this ever happening, though.

Did you speak to your father today?  Yessssssss, I literally just caught a glimpse of him like two minutes ago.

Did you kiss someone before you were sixteen?  No, I was 16 turning 17 when I had my first.

Could you go a day without eating?  Yeah, but I wouldn’t feel well by the end of it. I’ve formed a habit of skipping breakfast and lunch on weekdays now, and I always feel like complete shit once I clock out. Considering I only eat dinner these days, I guess I can say I do regularly go entire days without eating.

Are your nails always painted? I never paint them/have them painted.

Have you ever met any bands/band members before?  Just local ones.

What color is your hair?  Black.

Your best friend needed somewhere to stay, could they live with you? Yes.

Have you danced in the rain?  Maybe? I don’t know. Doesn’t sound like something I would do, though.

When you said something naughty when you were little, did your parents wash out your tongue with soap?  Nope. I never liked getting in trouble, even as a kid, so I stayed out of it.

What do you think of spanking little children when they do something wrong? Okay or not?  That’s a common practice where I live, at least it was during my time. My mom didn’t believe in spanking her kids, which I’ll always be thankful for; but the cousins I lived with didn’t have the same fate so I regularly had to watch them get spanked - with sticks, slippers, belts, etc basically anything that was within reach. I think today’s generation of parents are different; I hope they are.

Who was the last male you hung out with?  Gab, Kyelle, Al, and Hans.

Who is your favorite person to text?  I don’t text anymore, but I do chat with Angela on Messenger everyday.

Who did you last take a picture with?  Does an online photo count? We had an event held through Zoom last Wednesday and we had a photo op by the end of it.

What’s your favorite brand of jeans? I don’t have any. I just wear whichever pair I’d feel good and confident wearing.

Which show is better: Spongebob or The Fairly Odd Parents?  Nooooooooo you’re making me pick between my two absolute favorites. I might have to go with Spongebob, but it barely barely barely won. Fairly OddParents is great too, at least until they added the baby fairy.

Has anyone ever told you that you looked like someone else?  Many times. Idk if I’m happy about it because something tells me it just means I have quite the common face. Idk. I don’t think too much about it and as long as I’m compared to someone I personally find pretty, it’s fine lol.

Do you enjoy the sound of crickets at night and birds in the morning?  Not so much. I find them too loud, especially the crickets.

Who is the most overrated singer?  Taylor Swift.

What is your favourite planet?  I don’t have one, but let’s go with Saturn.

Do you have any pets that you had since you were born?  Wow no. 23 years is a very long time.

Do you own anything that you had when you were a baby?  Yep, my mom kept all our umbilical cord stumps. It’s in our baby albums.

Do you enjoy Mario games?  Very much so. It’s the only franchise I can play HAHAHA

What’s your favorite online game?  I don’t play online games.

Have you ever been hit with a ball in gym class?  I probably have been.

Do you ever turn your cell phone off?  I used to sometimes shut it off whenever I’d fight with my ex and I didn’t want to deal with the world for a while. Now with the toxicity out of my life I never turn it off lol.

Who was last to cook for you?  My mom made pasta for dinner tonight. Then after that I asked her to make me coffee mixed with Milo.

Do you check your texts right away when you receive them?  Depends on who texts. I get anxious when it’s media texting, so I tend to ignore those for a few hours unless they ask something urgent. If it’s someone from my inner circle, like a friend or one of my parents, I would check and reply immediately, or at least as soon as I see the text.

Who is your most trusted person?  Mmm, probably Angela. I literally reached out last night to ask her to log on to my Facebook so she can unfriend Gab and her family on my behalf. I don’t think I would’ve asked that from anyone else.

How late did you stay up last night?  A little earlier than my usual, around midnight or so. I knew my load was going to be packed today since my manager had filed a leave which meant I had to cover for her tasks as well, so I wanted to get enough rest so that I didn’t wake up sleepy and cranky.

When/where are you most likely to sing?  As long as I’m alone, I’ll sing. I like to do it, just not in front of other people.

Would you ever wish to explore a cave?  That would be soooooooo nice. It’s been a while since I’ve been in a cave. :(

You see the person you fell hardest for. What do you do?  I imagine giving her an awkward smile and probably being the first to approach. Then I would ask how she’s been. I’m in a place in my life where I’m sure I’ll be able to do that.

Have you been/are you depressed?  I’ve been there many times.

Are your pop-ups blocked on your computer? Yes.

Have you ever ridden in a car with someone who was high?  No. I would hate to be in that situation.

Who is the best hugger you know?  Laurice.

Have you ever had to be put to sleep for an operation?  Nopes.

Does anybody have any proof of stupid things you have done?  I know Angela has a few. Gabie took a few as well; whether she still has them or not I’m not updated on anymore, nor do I care.

Why did you text the last person in your inbox?  I was just reminding Angela there was a BTS video coming out tonight.

Have you ever been able to do a split?  No but I’ve attemped to do it many times.

Did you ever date the last person you kissed?  Yes.

Are you intimidated by the last person you know talked badly about you?  I never keep track of things like that. I know it would bring nothing but unnecessary stress, so I never snoop or ask around to check if anyone’s been talking not-so-nicely about me behind my back.

Have you ever cried in school?  Maybe only about once or twice in the 18 years I was in school. I absolutely hate crying in front of people, and I mainly do it when I’m alone. I don’t think I’ve even ever cried in front of Angela; that’s how much I hate it.

Last person of the opposite sex you screamed at?  I don’t remember ever screaming at a guy.

Do you have any weird sleep habits?  I...wouldn’t know, since I’m asleep when I do them. I always sleep alone too, so no one would be able to tell me how I sleep. All I know is I’m not much of a mover and I usually wake up in the same position (or almost the same position) I fell asleep in.

Do you consider yourself an emotional person?  Yes, I’m sensitive in every sense of the word.

When was the last time you had a headache?  Last Wednesday when not eating for the entire day finally hit me like a truck by the end of my shift. :/

When was the last time you encountered a puppy? Cooper circa September.

Is there anything that happened a long time ago that you still laugh about?  Yes, many instances.

Do you ever try to interpret your dreams?  No, I don’t think anything of them beyond “just weird scenarios of people I know doing weird things.”

What was the last thing you bought impulsively?  Three orders of sushi, 24 pieces in total.

How do you feel about singing songs out loud in front of other people? No amount of money would make me do it.

When was the last time you were feeling really, really nervous?  This afternoon when a supplier we’re currently working with asked to call. Normally my manager would be the one mainly in touch with people like them, but since she was out today I was next in line.

If you’re no longer in school, what is something you miss about it? If you’re still in school, what’s something you think you’re going to miss about it? I miss seeing my friends everyday and being able to hang out after our classes, even if it just means sitting at a table doing nothing together.

Do you use your turn signals when you’re driving?  Excessively. I use it even in the subdivision lmao, or on one-way roads.

How exactly are you feeling right now?  Content. It’s a little hot and mosquitoes keep flying around me, but I’m not letting these affect my mood. Just focusing on the fact that it’s a Friday night and I can let go of work for a couple of days.

Have you ever had to board up your windows because of a hurricane?  Never happened before. I just close up my windows completely so that they don’t slam if ever the wind gets too strong.

Do you tell anyone to chew with their mouths closed?  I don’t recall ever feeling the need to do this. The sound doesn’t bother me much anyway; definitely not as much as it annoys most people.

Have you ever ordered pizza and sent it to someone else’s house?  Yup I did that for Angela and Kata recently, for my birthday, along with truffle mac and cheese. Basically my favorite orders from Mama Lou’s, haha.

What was the first thing you drank when you woke up this morning? I believe it was water.

Do you think stretch marks from having a baby are ugly or badges of honor?  Ugh this question is so outdated I don’t even want to take the time to answer it.

Ever done a keg stand?  No.

Who is the last person you lent money to?  I don’t lend my money.

Do you share clothing with anyone?  Mmm, sometimes. It’s usually me borrowing clothes from my sister, though.

Have you ever visited anyone in a rehab?  Nope.

Was the last thing you drank a Coke or Pepsi product?  No, it was just water. I’d never be caught craving for soda.

Honestly, do you think that you’re going to be an overprotective parent? No. I experienced having strict parents, so I know it’s not something I would want to pass on to my kids. I want my kids to be able to go out with friends and attend parties and get tattoos (when they’re older) and express their identity without being scared of me.

What was the last kind of chips you ate?  Piattos cheddar chips.

What is one thing that you really wish you could understand, but don’t?  Investing and stocks.

What is the last thing you charged?  My laptop.

Have you ever held a snake?  Yes. I’m always the only one in the family willing to do things like this when we go on vacations haha.

[sassyduckqueen]

Miraculous: Rise of Anatis 21

I really liked how this one turned out and we have an adorable moment between Lady Noir and Anatis. As a heads up peeps, Puppeteer 2 and Silencer will be happening a lot sooner than the rest of season 3 but as you know, I don't really give a crap about chronological order. I believe most of the episodes can be viewed in any order, expect for a few that are have some kind of chronological order. Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter!!

------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Twenty One: Prime Queen

"Tonight on our first edition on Face to Face, you'll have the opportunity of the lifetime! The chance to talk live with Anatis and Lady Noir, along with me. Nadja Chamack," The news reporter smiled on the TV as Tikki watched it, eating a cookie. Luka was in the shower and she had been watching some cartoon when this advert came on. Luka had told her about the interview but she wasn't sure if she agreed with it. "We'll be revealing some sizzling hot information about your favorite superheroes! Don't be bemused, it's just the news!"

 "Sizzling-hot revelations?!" Tikki gasped, flying up as Luka walked in. He looked over at her as he dried his hair. She flew over to him as he grabbed a cookie. "Luka! You're supposed to be a superhero not a star! You're meant to be mysterious and elusive to protect yourself from Hawkmoth!"

 "Hm?" He looked up as he ate his cookie. She looked at him with a worried expression. "I know that Tikki,"

 "Are you sure this interview is a good idea?!"

 "Don't worry," He smiled, holding out his hand. She floated down and landed on his palm. "I only agreed to it because it's an opportunity to reassure Paris about Hawkmoth and so they know me and Lady Noir will do everything we can to keep them safe,"

 "Just be careful tonight ok?" She muttered.

 "I will be," He smiled before rolling his eyes to the side. "But no promises regarding Lady Noir,"

 Tikki gasped in horror as if she had forgotten that he wasn't the only hero to get interviewed tonight. Luka smiled a little as she froze in place, having a mini crisis. Probably realizing that Plagg would not as worried as she was and would more then likely encourage discord given his status as the god of destruction. Or least, Luka had concluded that, since he hadn't actually met the cat god. 

 "Don't worry, Tikki. I'll make sure she's on her best behavior," He laughed before his alarm went off. He grabbed his phone and switched it off. "Speaking of which, it's show time,"

 "Already?" She asked.

 "Yup," He replied, swiping his earring. "Tikki! Spots on!!"

 A few seconds later, Anatis dived out of the porthole of the Liberty and swung across the city towards the TV Studio. He landed on the rooftops and ran as fast as he could before diving off and throwing his yoyo. It wrapped around one of the flag poles, using it to propel himself through the air before throwing his yoyo again. This time catching it onto a chimney. He landed on the roof and saw the TV Station in sight. He dived off the building. Throwing his yoyo, he wrapped it around one of the billboards before pulling himself up to the roof. He landed on the roof and pulled back his yoyo before clipping it back onto his belt. He walked over to the fire door and opened it before heading down into the building. He ran down the stairs before heading to the studio. He frowned to himself as he saw Lady Noir wasn't here yet. He walked over to Nadja, who looked up when she saw him.

 "Ah, Anatis," Nadja smiled. "It's good to see you. Thank you for agreeing to this,"

 "No worries, Nadja," He smiled before looking to the empty sofa. "She's not here yet?"

 "No, not yet," Nadja explained before gesturing towards tea trolley as he took a seat. "Would you like some of the food before we go live, Anatis? Also do you want any make up done? Our team is the best-"

 "Make up wise I'm good but I'll have some of those snacks," He smiled back before taking a small handful and eating a few as they started to go through the last checks. His yoyo vibrated as he took a drink of water. He placed down the bottle and opened it before typing back then he looked at Nadja. "She's on route,"

 "Oh good," She smiled as the crew did their last checks. The door's literally burst open as Lady Noir came in. She ran over before jumping over the camera and landing next to Anatis, who was completely unfazed by her actions before she took a seat and grabbed the water bottle he was holding out to her. She unscrewed it and downed it before gasping for breathe.

 "Thanks, Annie. I needed that," She grinned as he smiled gently at her. "Oh! Snacks!"

 She grabbed a small handful as well and ate them as an intern removed the tea trolley before taking more gulp of her water. The camera men did their final check as Nadja held her earpiece as she listened to instruction. 

 "And we're going live in... 3... 2..." The direction gave the signal as Nadja turned to the camera and put on her best smile.

 "Good evening. I'm Nadja Chumack and this is Face-to-Face," She stated into the camera. Anatis watched as she looked nervous before she lifted her hand and pointed to them. "For our first edition, I welcome the beloved guardians of Paris. Anatis and Lady Noir. Hello!"

 One of the cameras panned onto them as they waved. Lady Noir had a nervous smile but she looked more confidence then Anatis, who wasn't quite sure what to do with himself. 

 "Thanks so much for accepting this exclusive live interview," Nadja smiled, gesturing around them before looking back at them.

 "Thank you, Nadja... um... for having us," Anatis smiled as Lady Noir nodded.

 "We're honored to be here," She smiled as Anatis played with his hands. "Hey Annie, why don't you say hi to your fans?"

 "I have fans?" He asked, a little confused. Lady Noir giggled and gently nudged his arm.

 "Of course, you do,"

 "I'm sure thousands have tuned in tonight," Nadja smiled.

 "Yeah, who wouldn't want to see their favorite bug," Lady Noir grinned before winking playfully. "Though everyone knows I'm the favorite. Right, Bugaboo?"

 "I'd say so but I am kind of bias on the situation, kitten," Anatis smiled, making her giggle softly as Nadja looked at her wrist.

 "Aha, ha, ha," Nadja faked laughed, making Anatis raise an eyebrow. "It's obvious the two of your are very close, right?"

 "Of course, me and Anatis are best friends," Lady Noir laughed, leaning her arm against him as Nadja nodded.

 "Right," She replied before looking back at her tablet then back at the superheroes. "People know you but we don't really know you. We see you saving Paris but don't know anything else about you. We know nothing of your passions or what you dislike. There are some rumors such as Anatis been scared of cats but other then that we don't know. Care to share any details?"

 "Well, I'm not afraid of cats for one thing," Anatis replied, smiling before turning back to been serious. "But with all due respect, we can't tell you anything regarding our personal lives. It could compromise our identities. Even something that may seem trivial to others could reveal who we are under the mask,"

 "I understand," Nadja nodded before glancing at her wrist again. She looked up and smiled. "How about we answer some questions from your biggest fans?"

 "Yep, let's do it," Lady Noir smiled as Anatis nodded. Nadja switched an icon on her tablet, which opened a video chat box on the big screen. To their horror, it was none other than Chloe.

 "Hello, caller. State your name and your question," Nadja stated as Chloe threw away her nail file.

 "Really, Nadja?" She questioned, making the woman and heroes frown. "Who else would be the first caller but me?! I'm only the most prestigious fan of Anatis and Lady Noir!"

 "Oh, yes. Of course," Nadja muttered before smiling. "Hello there Chloe Bourgeois, daughter of the Mayor of Paris,"

 "Don't forget that Daddy is the manager of the Grand Paris Hotel, only the best luxury hotel in all of Paris!!" She declared, making both Anatis and Lady Noir sigh a little.

 "Uh...thanks for reminding us. So what is your question, Chloe?"

 "Oh, I don't have a question. I just wanted to say hi!!" She grinned, waving. "Since... as you know... we are such very good friends, Lady Noir, Anatis and I,"

 Anatis waved back a little but quickly dropped his hand when he saw Lady Noir's expression. He frowned a little as he looked over at Nadja, who pulled a face as she looked at her wrist then smiled.

 "Thank you, Chloe Bourgeois. Next caller," She stated, causing Chloe to start shouting that she wasn't finished before Nadja brought up the next call.

 "Hi there, Anatis and Lady Noir!!" Alya grinned as she held up her phone. Anatis rose an eyebrow as Lady Noir froze in her seat. "I'm Alya and I'm wondering if you'll grant me an interview for the Ladyblog... you know since I get more views then Nadja,"

 "Um... well... uh!" Lady Noir gasped, causing Anatis to smile a little before he turned to the call.

 "Sure, Alya," He stated, making her gasp. "I'm sure we can arrange something," 

 "That totally rocks!! Thank you!! Thank you!!" She gasped as Manon appeared on screen, declaring herself on TV. Both Nadja and Lady Noir gasped.

 "Manon? But where's Marinette?"

 "Oh, she's just getting us some snacks," Alya covered, causing Lady Noir to mentally breathe and for Nadja to look relieved. However, her facial expression changed to one of worry as she looked down as if listening to what someone had said to her. She swiped down on her tablet, ending the phone call before turning back to Anatis and Lady Noir. 

 "Uh... Anatis... Lady Noir..." She mumbled as she clapped her hands together. Her eyes flicker to the side as if she's trying to work out what to say before she looks back at them. "Um... so a lot of fans think of you as a couple of superheroes..."

 Anatis felt the hairs stand up on his neck. He didn't like how nervous Nadja looked. 

 "But also and I quote as a couple," She stated, suddenly getting her confidence back.

 "What?!" Lady Noir gasped as Anatis just stared in shock. When he agreed to do the interview, this was not what he had in mind. Nadja narrowed her eyes and looked ready to pounce. Her eyes were on the prize so to speak and the prize was their love lives. 

 "Can you confirm that you two are dating here tonight?" She asked, causing Lady Noir to stare at the sheer cheek of her question. Anatis cleared his throat as he looked around nervously.

 "I'm sorry, Nadja but we are not here to answer such personal questions," He replied in a stern manner as Lady Noir nodded in agreement. Hopefully, that will put the idea out of her head. Nadja frowned a little at his answer. "Look, we really appreciate the invite to this interview and all but we only agreed to it so we can reassure Paris,"

 "Exactly!" Lady Noir gasped, finally finding her voice. "We're here to assure all Parisians that they're safe and that it's only a matter of time before we defeat Hawkmoth. That's all,"

 Once again, Nadja looked worried before she nodded her head.

 "Ah, fine," She muttered, though Anatis had a feeling she wasn't talking to them. She faced the screen before swiping on her tablet. A picture of Lady Noir kissing Anatis appeared and instantly, Lady Noir sank down into her chair with a light blush on her cheeks but she also looked extremely embarrassed. While he didn't remember it, Lady Noir had told him why she had kissed him. "How do you explain this picture then?"

 "Simple. That was the day that the akuma Dark Cupid made an appearance. As you can see, my lips in that picture are black," Anatis stated, crossing his arms. "Lady Noir saved me from him and that's all that is to it,"

 "What about this one?" Nadja asked, changing the photo to one that looked like Anatis was hugging Lady Noir.

 "That was the same day. I got hit one of Dark Cupid's arrows," He shrugged but Nadja smirked.

 "You mean you sacrificed yourself to protect Lady Noir?" She asked. "That sounds like love to me,"

 "No, it's called been a decent person and protecting my partner," He argued back, causing Nadja to smirk even more before she showed more pictures of the two of them. The next one showed him actually hugging Lady Noir. That had been taken after the defeat of Animan. She had jumped into his mouth and Anatis had been worried that he had lost her for real. The photo changed to showing them to flying through the air. Lady Noir was holding onto him as they did. The next photo showed her leaning over him. It had been taken when she had pushed him out of the way of an akuma's attack and the last one showed the two of them sat on a rooftop together. She was leaning her head on his shoulder as they just sat watching for akumas. Of course, it looked like they were a couple watching the sunset.

 "It's so obvious that you're both in love," Nadja smiled. Anatis went to argue but Lady Noir shook her head.

 "These are just a bunch of photos taken out of context. Me and Anatis are best friends and partners, not lovers,"

 "Lady Noir is right. All we're doing is our job. That photo where we're sat on that building. We're looking out for akumas and trouble. The one that showed us hugging. That was taken after the defeat of Animan, which was a very trying akuma. In case, you have forgotten... to defeat him, I jumped into his jaws so of course, Lady Noir hugged me afterwards. She was worried," Anatis added before pinching his nose and shaking his head. "We save Paris together every day but that doesn't make us a couple,"

 "You two practically are a couple," Nadja countered.

 "No, we're not," Anatis replied back, standing up.

 "Why won't you tell the truth?" Nadja gasped, looking at them. 

 "It is the truth, Nadja," Lady Noir added in, standing next to Anatis, who had his arms crossed and an annoyed look on his face.

 "Come on... the audience awaits your answer," She sang a little but that seemed to be the final straw for Anatis.

 "Uh! Do I have to spell it out for you?!" He yelled, clearly annoyed. "We. Are. Not. Dating!!"

 "Come on. Everyone thinks that you two are a great couple," Nadja stated, ignoring his comment. "You don't have to be shy and lie about it,"

 Nadja must of realized her mistake because she gulped a little as soon as she saw their expressions. Lady Noir's was one of disappointment and disgust but she had nothing on Anatis. To say, he was annoyed was an understatement. His hands were clenched in fists and he was visibly shaking as he stared daggers at Nadja. Lady Noir noticed and placed her hand on his arm, causing him to snap out of it. He took a deep breathe then turned back to Nadja with a cold stare.

 "We are done. This interview is over," He replied, turning on his heel and walking towards the exit with Lady Noir. Nadja stood shocked for a little bit before shaking her head.

 "Hey! Wait you two!!" She gasped, reaching out for them. "The show isn't over yet and your fans will be disappointed!!"

 "If they're our true fans, they'll understand," Lady Noir hissed, making Nadja frown before her and Anatis when to leave. However, he stopped for a second and turned to face Nadja.

 "For the record, Ms Chumack, I'm not a liar and I'm disappointed that you'd go so far as to suggest that I am," He stated then the heroes exited the studio, leaving Nadja alone.

 (***)

 "Are you ok?" Lady Noir asked as they jumped through Paris. Anatis landed on a rooftop before sitting down, causing Lady Noir to sit next to her.

 "I'm fine. I'm just annoyed that she was willing to do anything to make her show a success," He muttered, throwing up his yoyo and catching it. Lady Noir nodded, understanding his frustration. "Are you ok?"

 "Hm? Oh yeah I'm fine," She grinned, knocking his arm with hers. "So people think we're dating?"

 "Urg... please don't remind me," He gasped, rolling his eyes before realizing how that must seem to Lady Noir. "I mean.... uh..."

 "Oh, you wound me!" She gasped, dramatically throwing herself against him as she placed her arm across her forehead before giggling and sitting up again. "Don't sweat it, Annie. I'm just not your type,"

 "That's not the case..." He coughed, going a little red but before they continue the conversation, the big billboard screen suddenly changed to a weird looking woman with red hair and blue skin. She seemed to be wearing a shield over her face and her eyes were completely blue with a hint of pink. Her outfit was pixelated and seemed to have a pattern across it that glowed blue. It reminded Anatis of a mother board of a computer. Her hands faded into bright pink as did her shoes. Anatis instantly jumped up and frowned as they looked at the woman.

 "Welcome everyone to a new show, hosted by me! Prime Queen!!" She declared before laughing. "Don't be bemused! It's just the news!"

 "Nadja?!" Lady Noir gasped, looking at Anatis who frowned deeply. Prime Queen laughed evilly before looking back at the camera.

 "Tonight, Anatis and Lady Noir disappointed all their loyal fans by refusing to admit their love for each other!!" She gasped, dramatically before jumping back and gesturing to a new screen. It suddenly turned on and showed Chloe in her bedroom. She gasped and stepped back in fear as Prime Queen faced her, holding some cables in her hands. "I've prepared some trials to see how they're willing to go to keep the truth hidden from us,"

 The two heroes frowned as the screen briefly turned right then Prime Queen reappeared on the screen, holding a tied up Chloe next to her.

 "Let's welcome our very first guest, Chloe Bourgeois!" She declared, gesturing to the audience before placing her hand on her hip. "Who's apparently a personal friend of our two superheroes,"

 "I certainly am," Chloe replied, making Lady Noir sigh as Anatis watched.

 "Just proves you can't believe what you see on TV," She stated, crossing her arms before flicking her eyes back to the screen.

 "Well then, dear Chloe... let's find out if you really can count on them as true friends," Prime Queen stated before snapping her fingers. The screen turned white again before she appeared again. This time, Chloe wasn't with her. "Welcome to the subway of suspense!"

 Horror filled Anatis' mind as he realized that Prime Queen was driving the subway train and it was more than likely that Chloe was trapped on it. As annoying as Chloe could be, they had to save her.

 "If it reaches 70 miles per hour," She states as she points to the corner of the screen. A speed gauge appeared there, showing the train's current speed which was only increasing. "You can say goodbye to your precious little friend!"

 Both Anatis and Lady Noir stared in horror as they watched the scene play out. It didn't take a genius to work out that Prime Queen intended to kill Chloe to get her ratings. She smirked as she looked down at her wrist. On the screen, they could see the rating gauge was in the yellow zone.

 "Well, well. Look here," She smirked evilly as she pointed to her wrist, showing the bars moving up into the yellow. "The ratings are rising! More and more of you want to know if our superhero friends will get here on time! The suspense is... killing her!!"

 She laughed evilly at her joke before turning back to the screen.

 "Anatis! Lady Noir!!" She called out before smiling wickedly. "Are you willing to travel through the screen to save your darling Chloe?"

 The screen finally showed Chloe, who was still tied up and trying to get some off her jacket. She faced the camera and pouted, clearly not happy.

 "Lady Noir!! Anatis!! I beg you!! Save my jacket!!" She gasped before falling over as the train's speed increased. The two heroes looked at each other before Lady Noir took out her baton and extended it towards the screen. It went straight through, proving that they could go through it. She recalled it and frowned deeply.

"Ready to go through, Kitten?" Anatis asked, making her frown. 

 "It could be a trap," She pointed out. "I'd rather find my own way,"

 "Agreed but there's a lot of subway trains in Paris and we have no way of knowing which one she's on..." Anatis frowned before sighing. "I think if we want to save her, we have no choice but to go through the screen,"

 "Well, I guess we're about to be the stars of this show," She stated, spinning her baton. "I hope you don't get stage fright,"

 "I was born to be in the limelight, kitten," Anatis grinned as the two of them stepped back far enough to allow to break into a run. Anatis looked toward Lady Noir, who nodded back at him before they both broke into a run before diving off the building and into the screen. Anatis grabbed onto the seating, catching himself as Lady Noir rolled and jumped up. She took out her baton as he took out his yoyo, spinning it but Chloe was frowning at them. They lowered the weapons.

 "Finally! What took you so long?!" She shouted. "Hurry up and get me out of this underground nightmare!!!"

 The train jolted, causing her to fall back down, revealing Prime Queen standing behind her on the other side of the carriage. Anatis frowned as she walked towards the other billboard, laughing before she stopped and blocked the door way.

 "You're about to be the stars of the highest rated show in all of TV history!" She declared, holding up her arm. The gaude was moving higher as the seconds ticked on.

 "The akuma must be in that watch," Lady Noir pointed out, causing Anatis to nod.

 "I'll deal with her while you get that door open. We need to stop this train," He ordered, getting a nod of her. He flicked out his yoyo and span it as the two of them charged over to Prime Queen. Anatis throw his yoyo at her as Lady Noir raced to the door. Prime Queen jumped out of the way of the yoyo, causing Anatis to shatter part of the window before he threw his yoyo at her again. She slipped back into a screen, causing him to break it as she watched from the others. Lady Noir tried the door and frowned as she looked back at Anatis.

 "We're trapped," She declared, causing him to look around in his luck vision but nothing lit up.

 "The rules of my show are simple!" Prime Queen declared. "Admit live on TV that you're dating and are in love and I'll stop the train!!"

 "As I already pointed out, I'm not a liar and I'm not about to start now!" Anatis growled back, making Lady Noir frown a little.

 "I want my scoop!!" She growled, making him glare at the screen even more.

 "Lady Noir, use your cataclysm!!" 

 "What if we need it later?" She asked, making him frown. "Like for an emergency?"

 "Now is an emergency!" He gasped but she pulled him closer to her so she could whisper in his ear. 

 "Annie, we have to lure her to us first or we'll never catch her akuma," Lady Noir whispered, causing him to sigh. He knew she was right. "So let's just play a lot with her. At least, it will buy us sometime,"

 "Meaning what?" He asked, looking at her. She winked at him then turned to the screen.

 "Ok, Prime Queen... you win," She gasped, grabbing Anatis' hand. "Anatis and I are dating, like you said... we are in love..."

 The train started to slow down, shaking the carriage and causing Anatis and Lady Noir to fall forward. His back hit the side of the train as she hit his chest. Her face turned bright red as she literally felt his muscles under her hands that were resting on his chest. She had tried to catch herself, which resulted in her placing her hands on him. He rose an eyebrow as she unintentionally purred.

 "Did you just purr?" He asked, slightly amused.

 "What?! No!!" She gasped, blushing madly as she pulled away from him. 

 "Our two heroic lovebirds are saving their fan's life by admitting their true feelings!!" Prime Queen declared, holding her hands together like she was happy. Her expression was one of joy and reminded Anatis of a fangirl. The screen then switched to a picture of their hands with several arrows pointing to them. "Our viewers are going crazy!!"

 Anatis and Lady Noir frowned a little as they watched.

 "But the ratings haven't maxed out yet!!" Prime Queen declared. "You must do better,"

 "Why don't you come and join us then?" Anatis invited as Lady Noir grinned.

 "Yeah, you're the host and star of the show after all," She added in, leaning her arm on his shoulder. "That way you'll have your ratings,"

 Prime Queen went quiet for a second before tapping her chin. She looked back at them and grinned evilly.

 "My show, my rules, Lady Noir!!" She declared, making both of them to frown. "To prove that your feelings are genuine, you'll have to remove your mask, which means you must give me your miraculous then you can treat our viewers with a sweet kiss!!"

 "No way!" Anatis growled, stepping forward. "We're not surrendering our miraculous and we are not kissing!! Even if we are in love, that's not right!! We're not some celebrities to be gossiped over!!"

 Prime Queen frowned and the screen turned black, causing Lady Noir to let out a sigh.

 "Oh, thank god you're thinking on the same lines as me," She muttered before walking over to the screen. "I'd hate to have my first, real kiss projected on screen... it was bad enough that she showed the one from when I saved you from Dark Cupid,"

 "Wouldn't that be your first kiss?" He asked, examining the screens. 

 "Oh, no. That was a peck," She grinned. "And it was to save you so it doesn't count. When people say first kiss, they mean a snog and trust me, that's what she wants us to do. Once we surrender our miraculous that is,"

 "Wow... so you've never actually kissed another person?" He asked, looking at her. She blushed and looked away shyly.

 "Well... no..." She gasped, looking back at him. "Have you?"

 "Um... well.... no actually..." He muttered, going red and looking shy. "um... moving on... think the show is over yet?"

 "No... I have a feeling that it's just beginning but if we can't get to her, we'll never catch her akuma," Lady Noir stated as the screen turned back on.

 "My dear viewers! You're in for the reveal of a lifetime!!" She declared, throwing her arms out. The cameras panned out, revealing she was now the egyptian area of the Louvre museum. She opened the coffin next to her, revealing Alya tied up inside. Lady Noir gasped in fear.

 "Lady Noir!! Anatis!! Help me, please!!" Alya gasped as she struggled before Prime Queen slammed the coffin shut before covering her mouth with her hand as she pretended to be surprised.

 "Oh wait! Isn't this the girl who started the famous Ladyblog?!" She gasped, rubbing the lid of the coffin. "The first one to film the heroes of Paris?!"

 "No! Alya!!" Lady Noir gasped, worry clear in her eyes.

 "Next trial! Your miraculous or your biggest fan will soon be mummified!!" She laughed as the screen next to Anatis turned white. He looked at Lady Noir, who was clearly scared for Alya.

 "Let's go and save Alya," He stated, taking her hand and giving her a reassuring smile before the two of them dived through it. Only the two of them fell into a freezer, causing them to shiver. "Not the Louvre..."

 "She double crossed us!!" Lady Noir growled, yanking at the door before she helped up her hand. Anatis grabbed her wrist, making her look at him.

 "We'll never get to the Louvre in time so don't use it just yet," He stated, making her frown as she rubbed her arms. "We'll find a way to save her..."

 "Aww, don't make promises you can't keep, Anatis," Prime Queen laughed. "The time has come to push those ratings sky high!!! Let's try this again!! Remove your miraculous and reveal your true selves!!"

 Lady Noir growled a little as Prime Queen held up her arm with the watch.

 "The whole world is watching you," She declared before lifting the coffin and spinning it before placing it upright. Anatis frowned as he watched. "There's no use looking for a way... unless you want to see your biggest fan in deep water..."

 She clicked her fingers and a small screen showing the Seine appeared on their TV. She spun the coffin again before pushing it back onto the floor, near a screen before smirking and placing her foot on the edge of the coffin. The two heroes gasped as she slowly pushed it through the screen that led to the Seine. 

 "Hurry up, you two!!" She sang as she pushed the coffin farther. "Don't want to keep your audience waiting,"

 "You're right," Anatis replied, throwing up his yoyo. "Lucky charm!!!"

 A tape roll appeared out of thin air and fell down. He frowned as he caught it.

 "A tape roll? Your lucky charms get weirder every time you summon one,"

 "Blame Tikki," He muttered as he looked around. His luck vision lit up most of the draws and the TV itself. Smirking to himself, he started to look in the draws for something, opening all the ones that were highlighted. Lady Noir blinked as she watched him. She shivered a little as she hugged herself, trying to keep warm.

 "Please hurry," She gasped, looking back at the screen. Prime Queen was slowly moving Alya farther in the screen. "She's about to drop Alya in the Seine,"

 "One minute," He declared, searching more.

 "That's too long!!" She gasped, tears in her eyes. "You promised..."

 "And I'm gonna keep it," He replied, searching them.

 "I'd listen to the cat if I were you, Anatis," Prime Queen declared as she pushed the coffin more. Anatis ignored her and opened a draw with apples before rushing over to another one. He opened that then rushed over to the next draw and opened it.

 "Volia," He muttered, grabbing the pizza box. He took out the pizza and handed it to Lady Noir, who looked at him questioningly as he walked back over to the tv. He placed the box over it and began to tape it to the screen, blocking Prime Queen's view. He winked at Lady Noir as he threw the tape roll, up and down in his hand before pointing to the side of the tvs. Realizing his plan, Lady Noir nodded and moved to the side of it. "Alright, Prime Queen, you win!! We'll remove our miraculous!! No more masks!! The whole world would see us without them..."

 "And we're about to kiss!" Lady Noir chimed in as Anatis moved to the other side. "Such a shame you're missing it though!!"

 "So unlucky!" Anatis teased before mouthing to Lady Noir. "When she comes through, break the tv,"

 She nodded, ready with her baton.

 "If you're lying, you'll regret it," Prime Queen declared before punching her hand through the pizza box. Anatis grabbed her arm and pulled her into the freezer, throwing her to the floor. Lady Noir used her baton to break the glass before walking over to Anatis.

 "And now you're stuck with us," She declared, causing Prime Queen to attack her. She dodged her fist before Prime Queen tried to punish Anatis. He blocked her punch and pushed her back, allowing Lady Noir to grab her arm and used her body to bring her to the floor, pinning her down. Anatis stepped on the watch, breaking it and releasing the akuma. Lady Noir released the now docile Prime Queen and jumped up. 

 "Cataclysm!!" She shouted before placing her hand on the door, destroying it. She stepped out as Anatis followed her, along with the akuma. He captured it with his yoyo then let it go once it was purified before taking out the tape roll and throwing it up in the air, shouting the magic words. The roll burst into the ladybugs that swarmed around fixing all that prime queen had done and reverting Prime Queen back to normal. She looked around, confused as the two heroes fist-bumped each other before Anatis walked over to her.

 "What happened?" She asked, looking around as he offered her his hand.

 "You were akumatized," He stated, helping her to her feet before rubbing his neck. "Look, I'm sorry for having a go at you but you really shouldn't be trying to get us to confession to something that isn't true. We're heroes but even if we weren't, it's not cool to spread gossip,"

 "I'm sorry, Anatis," She muttered, looking down. "I just wanted the show to be a success and then there was my boss breathing down my neck. She wanted me to do whatever it took to get the views but I ended up insulting you and Lady Noir..."

 "Nadja, your show doesn't need false news to be a success and your boss shouldn't pressure you so much," He stated, placing a hand on her shoulder. "You're a good journalist and I know you can make it without sacrificing your morals. Though... I have an idea as to how you can have a successful show...."

 "You do?" She gasped, surprised that he was willing to help her. 

 "Yeah... maybe you could work with Alya. She's got talent but could do with a mentor," He smiled as his earrings beeped. "Uh... sorry... I have to go!! Bye!!"

 He ran out and left, leaving Nadja and Lady Noir waving before Lady Noir gasped her ring beeped as well, reminding her that she needed to go home and check on Alya and Manon.

 ~A Couple of Days Later~

 "Don't be bemused! It's just the news!!" Nadja smiled as she looked the screen. She looked much happier then she previous was and her smile was genuine. Lady Noir smiled to herself as she sat on the roof where she and Anatis meet for patrol. She was watching the show through her baton. "Hi, I'm Nadja Chamack and this is Side-by-Side! Today, I'm joined by Alya Cesaire, who created the Ladyblog,"

 Alya waved nervously at the screen as the camera panned over to her.

 "Together we'll be looking back over Anatis and Lady Noir's greatest feats," Nadja declared as the camera went back to her. "Alya, over to you,"

 "Hello Nadja! Hey fans!!" Alya grinned, waving again. "So, first of all, I've gotta the record straight... Lady Noir and Anatis are not a couple! Well... not yet at least! Sorry to break the news!"

 "Is that Side-by-Side?" Anatis asked as he walked over and sat next to her. She paused the video and nodded, looking at him. "I'm glad Nadja got her primetime show,"

 "And this time she didn't sacrifice her morals," Lady Noir smiled, kicking her legs out. "Sooo...I am your type huh?"

 "What?!" He gasped, blushing as she laughed.

 "Just before we got interrupted by Prime Queen, you basically said that I was your type," She winked, making him blush and groan. 

 "I was hoping you had forgotten that," He muttered, hiding his face in his hands as she laughed.

 "Not a chance!" She grinned, nudging him. "D'aww... look at you... you're all embarrassed and blushy... I never had you down for been so innocent, Annie..."

 "You're evil," He muttered, making her laugh more.

 "Nah, you're just too easy to wind up," She winked but looking at him seriously. "But we could go out you know... I like you... you seem to like me... so..."

 "We can't," He states, making her frown. "It's not because I dislike you cause I don't. Any guy would be lucky to have you but... I'm in love with someone else..."

 "Oh... I understand," She mumbled, nodding. Of course, she already knew this but if she told him that, it would give away her identity as Marinette. "So are you with them?"

 "Oh... um... no... I'm not..." He replied, sadly, looking down. "They're in love with someone else,"

 "Oh, gosh. I'm sorry," She muttered, even those she already knew that. She also knew how hard it can be when the person you love loves another. She's been that situation twice after all. "Well, they don't know what they're missing! You're be a real catch. Handsome, creative, fun, intelligent!"

 "Thanks, Kitten," He smiled a little, making her grin before she frowned. "What is it?"

 "If this person wasn't around... would you consider me?" She asked, playing with her hands. Part of her was dreading his answer. She knew he would say no and mentally cursed herself for asking but she couldn't take it back now. He looked down a little before taking a deep breathe.

 "I.. I don't know how to say this without it sounding insulting," He muttered, making her frown. Was the idea of dating her that bad? "You see it's not that I wouldn't want to date you, cause who wouldn't. You're amazing and honestly, if I wasn't in love with this person, I'd probably fall for you... but I'd never ask you out,"

 Ok, that wasn't what she was expecting. She was expecting him to straight up say no and that he would rather die then date her. She frowned to herself, noticing that her self esteem was very low. She bit her lip as she was wondered why he would actually ask her out. He looked at her and sighed as she realized she had said that out loud. He played his hands and swallowed a little before licking his lips. He was nervous. She hadn't seen him this nervous before. He always seemed so chill and in control of his emotions. Sure, there were times when he got angry and he certain didn't do it by half but he always got his emotions under control.

 "It wouldn't be fair," He answered, causing her to raise an eyebrow. "If I was to date you, I'd want to know who you are underneath the mask. Sure, I like Lady Noir but she's only part of you but I'd want to fall for the person beneath the mask. That person is the real you. Without her, you can't be Lady Noir and that's who I would want to be with but I'd want the same for me. I don't want to be loved because I'm a superhero. This isn't who I really am. It's just part of me. I'm only Anatis for a short amount of time, compared to my civilian self. When I go home after a fight, it's not Anatis who deals with the fact that I just had to fight a supervillain or that my partner took a hit for me. It's the person beneath the surface who deals with that and I'd want to be loved for them, not for some mask I put on so other people don't have to be afraid..."

 "That's really deep," Lady Noir whispered, touching his hand as he looked down. For some reason, it reminded her of some that that Luka would say but the thought quickly got pushed to the back of her mind.

 "But that's impossible with you..." He whispered, looking at the sky as she frowned. "We can never know who is beneath the other's mask so if I ever fell for you, I wouldn't tell you because it wouldn't be fair on either of us and that way Hawkmoth wouldn't be able to use it as a weakness. If one of us got akumatized then the other would be safe since we don't know each other's identities but it was a clever thing to do with Prime Queen... pretending we're in love..."

 "It wasn't pretend for me," She muttered, making him sigh.

 "I'm sorry," He muttered, feeling bad but she gently placed her hand on top of his, making him look at her. She smiled softly in a way that oddly reminded him of Marinette but the thought disappeared among the music in his mind.

 "Don't be sorry. You're my friend above all else and I'm happy to have this time with you," She smiled, reassuring him. Normally, he was the one to say such things but it was a relief to hear her say it. "So this girl you love... does she know?"

 "No," He muttered, looking down. She frowned at the answer before she wanted to see him happy. "I'm not sure she sees me... like she sees me physically but as long as her sunshine is there, I'll always be invisible,"

 "Well... maybe you should tell her..."

 "No... I don't think I could," He muttered, making her frown. "She's too precious to me. Besides, she would never love me the way I love her... what about you? You must like someone else other than me,"

 "Well, there is two other boys," She smiled dreamily, making him smile. "There's both artists and very gifted at their chosen paths. Obviously, I can't tell you names or descriptions but one of them is so supportive. He always encourages me and we're very close,"

 She blushed as she thought about Luka.

 "I like him a lot... I like the other guy too but I can't talk to him. I always mess up my words and my clumsiness goes haywire with him but with the supportive one... it's easy. I can talk to him and I never mess up. He's so sweet and understanding as well. It's like he just gets me," She smiled. "I can gush about my passions and he never once gets bored. He likes my passion apparently. He even came with me so I didn't feel like a third wheel when I was helping a friend of mine with a girl he liked..."

 "He sounds like a keeper," Anatis replied. "Why don't you tell him you like him?"

 "Oh, well... um..." She muttered, rubbing the back of her neck. "Well, because I always mess up stuff like that... not that he minds when I mess up... he's even said it's cute..."

 "That guy likes you a lot," Anatis pointed out, making her blush. "I bet he would say yes if you asked him,"

 "Oh no! I couldn't," She gasped before looking at him. "You really think he'll say yes?"

 "Yeah. You should tell him you like him at least," He stated, making her gush and blush. "You deserve to be happy,"

 "So do you," She smiled before getting an idea. "How about a deal?"

 "A deal?" He asked, wearily before smiling. "Let's hear it,"

 "I'll tell the boy I like that I like him if you tell this girl that you like her," She suggested, holding out her hand. "Deal?"

 "Ummm.... it might take a while for me to pluck up the confidence to do so..." He admitted, making her smile.

 "Don't worry. I'm exactly the same," She grinned, still holding out her hand. "We have to let each other know that we confessed to our crushes as well. Even if they reject us,"

 "I can't believe I'm actually going to agree to this but ok," He stated, taking her hand and shaking it. "It's a deal,"

 "You won't regret it!" She grinned. "Hopefully, I won't either,"

=============================================

Next Chapter: Chapter 22

[silentglassbreak]

I saw your prompts are open and I had to jump in! I love your writings for our boys, esp the fluff it makes me so soft when they’re soft💚 maybe something where they have kids and go SUPER HARD for Halloween and have really intricate family costumes that they work on, like all year and it’s just fluffy and everyone loves each other and is happy 🥺 you’re such a wonderful writer!! Thank you!!

Before we begin, I’d like to say a few things:

Firstly, thank you for requesting this. I had no idea how badly I needed to write this. It made my heart so happy to create this, and I sincerely hope it doesn’t disappoint. 🖤

Secondly, I know this one kind of goes off on some tangents, but I did my best to keep it on prompt as well as I could, but there was so much I needed to include, and so much I didn’t.

Third, let me know what we think of Riley? I kind of really loved writing her into a story with Billy and Steve, and am thinking of exploring her character more in the future. Feedback, please?

Fourth(isn’t this getting ridiculous?), I was chopping down a tree in my front yard when I got this, and literally s t o p p e d to start it. I did have to go back and finish the job, and it’s really okay, the tree was dead, but I’ve been working on this most of the night, and that’s how excited I was for this prompt.

Fifth(seriously, get on with it), I chose Hocus Pocus 150% for a real fucking reason. That movie is everything to me, and -fun fact- I’m actually named after a character in that movie! 😉 (No, my name is not Winifred)

Last(omg, rly?), if you would like a song rec for the story, I highly recommend Crystal by Stevie Nicks. It’s where I got the title, and honestly, it’s kind of the unofficial theme I’ve assigned to the Harringrove ship as a whole. If you’ve seen the movie Practical Magic, you’ll recognize it.

Now, shall we begin?

Like The Love That Had Finally Found Me

October 29, 1993 - Hawkins, IN

“Steve, you’re going to rip the fabric!” Nancy was nearly screaming at him from across the kitchen, coffee in one hand, spoon stirring in the other. “Do you want milk or half and half?” He was only somewhat listening to her by now, but he answered around the pins in his mouth, fingers working to sew the orange and yellow fringe onto the black velvet scarf.

“Uhm…” He finally tore his eyes away and looked up at the brunette girl standing in his kitchen. “Milk, please.” She nodded and poured the hot coffee into the rainbow mug that read ‘#1 Dad’. She wasn’t sure if Riley had picked it out for Steve or Billy, but either way, it made her smile to herself.

“You’re almost done. It’s going to look great,” she set the steaming cup down in front of him at the kitchen table. “unless you oversew and tear a hole in it.” Her hand came to gently rest on his. Her clear blue eyes shining up at him, he finally faltered, snipping the thread with his scissors and setting down the scarf.

He breathed a sigh that wore as tired as he felt. The last three and a half months had been absolute mayhem for him and Billy, causing the entire end of summer and beginning of fall to feel like a never ending shift. He regretted nothing.

Back in July, when Billy took their daughter to see Hocus Pocus for their regular Sunday Dad-Riley Movie Night, she came home starry eyed and as enthusiastic as a firework.

‘Daddy, that was the best movie ever! You have to come with Dad and I, to see it again next weekend! I want to be Dani Dennison for Halloween! And you can be Max, and Dad can be Billy the Zombie! That’s already his name. Did you know I’m the same age as Dani? She’s eight too! Can we get a black cat to be Binx? Please, Daddy, pleeeeease?!’

From that moment forward, Hocus Pocus had become Steve’s life. Billy was working full-time at the auto shop, so Steve had more free time to concentrate on the task at hand. And concentrate, oh he fucking did.

Steve Harrington’s life had become so much more than he had ever imagined. Eight years may be a long time to some, but for him, it was the fastest moving period of time he had ever lived for. One year after the Starcourt ‘burning’, Billy had officially recovered from his near-fatal injuries, and spontaneously confessed his feelings to Steve. It was an angry, awkward, embarrassing time for them, that led to almost a month of denial and avoidance from both Steve and Billy. In that three-week-five-day period, Billy had grown to understand that Steve needed time, and had not actually rejected him. It was a process, that Billy later decided was worth the wait.

The following six months led to the ultimate change, which was Billy finally leaving Neil Hargrove’s house and moving in with Chief Hopper as his ‘adopted’ son. Billy was almost nineteen, so they didn’t bother with the paperwork, but Hopper did bother to get to know Billy, work to understand him, and finally comfort him enough to make him feel at home.

Billy then found himself with two younger sisters, and when Hopper and Joyce married three months later, a younger brother, and a brother his own age. Steve was grateful he got to witness the change in Billy; the growth. He found himself falling for Billy harder every day, resistance dissolving a little each time he saw his toothy, devious grin.

Two years after the disaster, Steve confessed his feelings to Billy, all fast-talking and nerves frayed. Told him that he had never felt this way for anyone, let alone a boy. Told him he had been scared and weak and apologized about three hundred times for making him wait. Billy forgave him with a kiss, an embrace, and a promise that things would be different.

Billy kept his promise.

Six months later, Steve experienced tragedy in the form of his younger brother, Troy Harrington, and his wife, Angela, being fatally injured in a car accident. The loss was trying on Steve, Billy having to hold him too many nights while he sobbed and shook, asking him questions he just could answer like why? And how? And who the fuck let this happen? It took time, it took work, and it took strength to pull out of the dark place Steve had crawled into, but he managed.

Two months later, Steve was approached by Marlena Andowski, Social Services Case Worker handling case number 22496A, Riley Harrington. Riley was two years and seven months old when her parents passed, leaving her an orphan and sleeping at her Uncle’s Steve’s every night. Marlena had asked Steve if he would consider adopting Riley, and Steve said yes with no hesitation, signing paperwork, showing paystubs and rent receipts, taking drug tests, and toddler-proofing his small apartment for the long haul ahead.

It took about one day for Billy to fall head over heels in love with Riley, and only seven months for her to call him Daddy for the first time. Billy didn’t know how to feel at first, until her little hands tugged on his shirt and pointed to the pink stuffed frog at the grocery store, repeating herself, ‘Please, Daddy! Can I get the Frog?’ Steve knew when they walked in the door, stuffed toy clutched in tiny arms, glittery red nail polish on Billy’s fingers, that they were a family.

And then, almost five years later, Steve found himself sitting in the kitchen of the home Billy and him purchased, less than forty-eight hours before Halloween, sewing the last of his daughter’s costume together so that everything was just right.

Steve drank from his coffee mug hungrily, with still so much to do and a very long night ahead, when Riley came barreling into the living room, Nancy and Jonathan’s daughter Madison, in tow.

“Daddy?” Steve looked at her, eyes tired.

“What’s up, sweetheart?” Her smile was sweet, beaming bright as the sun.

“Can Maddie sleep over? We want to watch Jurassic Park, she hasn’t seen it yet.” He raised an eyebrow at her.

“Did Maddie ask her mother if that’s okay?” He eyed the small, light-brown haired girl standing behind Riley, who was turned toward Nancy.

“Mama, can I-“ Nancy put up a hand to stop her.

“Do you have homework this weekend?” Both girls shook their heads in unison. She smirked and looked to Steve. “It’s fine with me if it is with you.” He turned his gaze back to his own little girl, smiling now.

“Okay, Jurassic Park is in mine and your Dad’s room, be careful taking it out of the VCR.” The girls squealed and made a dash for the hallway when Steve called out. “Riles!” She turned her head to him, stopped in her tracks. “Lights out at eleven!” She grinned wide.

“Midnight?” He narrowed his stare and pursed his lips.

“Eleven-thirty, final offer.” She nodded her head and she was gone.

*

Billy opened the door with a loud thump. He really needed to fix the latch. Steve watched from the couch where he had The X-Files reruns playing, taking a break from his Halloween-related chores. Steve still had to finish cleaning the house, put up the decorations, and make the food for the party they were throwing in two days’ time, all while working mornings at Family Video; the back office work that came with owning a business. He did most of it from home, but he had to go in sometimes, if only to remind the teenagers he hired that they can’t make out in the workplace.

“Hey babe.” Billy’s voice was gruff, filled with exhaustion. Steve smiled at him, eyes watching Billy toe off his boots and pull his jacket off, hanging it on the rack near the door. “How’d the day go?” Keys and wallet dropped on the hall table, Billy made his way over to the kitchen.

“As to be expected.” Binx was purring softly in his lap, Steve’s hand idly stroking sleek, black fur. “Riley got her math test back, aced it, of course.” Billy snorted while he washed the grease from his hands.

“She better have. We studied for weeks for that damn test.” Steve turned the volume down on the television and picked up the cat laying in his lap, gently placing him aside on the cushions. He padded through the dining room and into the kitchen, moving for the fridge to grab a beer. He took a long pull and sighed on the exhale while setting another down on the counter next to Billy.

“We had spaghetti for dinner because it’s Friday.” Riley always wanted pasta on Fridays. Billy dried his hands on a dish towel before grabbing his beer. Steve noted his hair was pulled back in a ponytail. “And I got her costume finished.” The last words came out triumphantly.

Billy nodded his head. “Right on. I’m excited to see it.” His gray t-shirt was oil-stained and dirty. The rugged look made Steve want to bounce up and down a little. He took another drink from his bottle.

“Mm, and Maddie’s sleeping over.” Billy looked at Steve, a smirk on his face. His feet moved him toward Steve until his face was close enough to touch.

“Ah, I see.” He set his beer down on the island, hands coming to run up and down Steve’s arms. “So, we won’t be seeing much of her tonight, then?” His eyes were dark.

It had been weeks since they had enough time alone to get their hands on each other, and Steve was so hungry. The smallest things were turning him on about Billy, to a point where he couldn’t watch him lick an ice cream cone without excusing himself. It was complete mania, and the thought of having him alone made Steve’s breathing cut short.

“I guess so.” His voice was low, eyes glancing over to the clock on the stove. Nine-thirty. He had two and a half hours before the girls had to be asleep. If they quietly excused themselves, maybe, just maybe, they could…

“Dad!” Their bodies pulled apart instantly, Riley’s voice filling their heads and clearing the thoughts they were both falling into.

“Hey, baby!” Billy stepped around Steve, arms opening for Riley to plunge into. He wrapped them around her in a bear-hug, bending down to meet her small frame. “How’s my girl?”

“Good! I got an A on my test!” He beamed at her, all teeth and pride.

“I heard! Great job, man!” He high-fived her. The moment made Steve’s heart tear in just a few places. Billy’s eyes were fixed on their daughter, chocolate brown hair falling down her back, pale skin, enormous brown eyes that always seemed to sparkle, purple striped pajamas and pink slippers.

“Hi Uncle Billy!” Maddie stood next to Riley, arms opened for a hug.

“Hey, kid, how you doin’?” He wrapped her in a hug as well, although, not as tight and protective. Those hugs were only for Riley.

“Great! I lost my last baby tooth yesterday!” She smiled as big as she could, showing a gap on the bottom row of her teeth. Billy leaned back, his face feigning something like disbelief.

“Nice! Did you put it under your pillow?” Her jaw dropped, eyes going wide.

“I FORGOT!” Riley was appalled as well, grabbing Madison’s hand.

“C’mon, you can put it under mine! The tooth fairy comes to my house too. Let’s go!” And they were running toward her room, Riley turning back to them for only a second. “Goodnight Dad! Goodnight Daddy! Love you!” Billy smiled after her.

“Love you too!” He echoed. Steve walked toward the hallway.

“Remember, you have to be asleep for the tooth fairy to come!” Steve called toward her door. When he saw it shut, he shrugged. “Well, Nancy’s going to owe me five bucks tomorrow.”

*

Midnight finally came, and Steve untangled himself from where he laid next to Billy on the couch. Steve pressed a kiss to the back of his hand and looked up into his eyes.

“I’m going to go check on the girls.” He stood and watched as Billy stretched out, shirt coming up to expose his stomach, a thin trail of hair leading down to his waistband. Steve could feel his mouth water before he tore himself away, making for the white door with the big green R painted on it. He pushed into the room and chuckled silently to himself when he saw the girls, arms everywhere and hair splayed over the pillows, Binx snoozing softly next to Riley’s head. He reached under Madison’s pillow, slipping the tooth out and sliding a five-dollar bill in its place. He snuck out of the room, leaving the door cracked just enough to allow Binx out if needed, and headed to the kitchen to put the tooth in a plastic bag.

While he was sneaking the baggie into his backpack sitting on the dining room table, he felt arms wrap around his middle. Billy’s voice was air rushing past his ear, making goosebumps rise on the back of his neck and a fire light in his belly.

“The girls asleep?” Steve smirked and turned his body toward Billy, lips coming to rest against his jawline.

“Like the dead.” Billy hummed in appreciation of the soft kisses Steve was leaving near his windpipe, hands reaching down to grab his ass, lifting him up, onto the wooden table. His face bent down, mouth finding Steve’s, hot and desperate. Steve’s arms were reaching the blonde hair, now falling loose over his shoulders. Billy’s hands were making work at the hem of Steve’s shirt, lifting it up over his head.

A hand came down to Billy’s chest, firmly stopping him from pulling at the waistband of Steve’s sweats.

“Let’s not do this here.” Billy nodded, panting. His fingers trailed down Steve’s chest, nails dragging against hot, needy skin.

“I need a shower.” Steve’s eyes were falling closed, the feeling of Billy’s hands making him crumble slowly. “Want to wash my hair?”

“Fuck yeah, I do.”

*

October 30, 1993 - Hawkins, IN

“Daddy, do you know where my Pacers sweater is?” Steve was standing at the stove, eggs sizzling in the pan, coffee brewing in the pot next to him. He was still only kind of awake, but Riley was frantically digging through the laundry basket on the table, bright-eyed and bushy tailed.

“I’m not sure, Riles. Did you check your closet?” He said around a yawn.

“And my drawers. It’s not here!”

“Maybe you left it in your Dad’s car?” She snapped and pointed at Steve.

“I did!” And she was running for the door. Always on the go, that one.

Steve heard the heavy footfall in the hallway that signaled Billy was awake. He mixed the cup of coffee quickly and held it out to his side, not even glancing when Billy slipped it out of his hand.

“Morning, sunshine.” Billy grunted to Steve in response, drinking the coffee before it was cool enough, not caring all the same. “How many eggs you want?”

“Three.” Steve looked at him then, waking a little more, only to admire him. Billy had no shirt on, sweats hanging low around his waist. His curls were everywhere, eyes barely open.

Riley strode toward them then, navy blue hoodie in hand, reaching for Billy.

“Here’s your keys dad.” She dropped them in his hand. Billy raised an eyebrow at Steve, who shrugged in response. “I’ll see you guys later!” Billy put a hand out in front of her.

“Where’s the fire, girl?” She wore a frustrated grimace.

“Nancy is here to pick up me and Maddie, I got to go!” She stood on her tiptoes and Billy bent his head down for her to place a small kiss on his cheek, then jogging over to Steve to do the same. “Bye, Daddy.”

When the front door shut, Billy looked to Steve.

“Where is our daughter going at nine in the morning on a Saturday?” Steve chuckled, plating the eggs.

“They’re going to El and Mike’s to help set up for the shower.” Billy scoffed as he moved over to the table.

“Who has a baby shower the day before Halloween?” He began devouring his eggs once Steve placed them in front of him. Steve paced himself slower, savoring the hot coffee in his hands.

“If they wait any longer they may not be able to have one before she pops.” Billy rolled his eyes and downed the rest of his coffee.

“Are we expected to attend?” His voice sounded of disdain. As domesticated as Billy was, baby showers weren’t really his forte.

“Nah, I don’t think so.” The blonde leaned against the kitchen counter, eyebrows wiggling at Steve.

“I’ve got you alone all day?” Steve laughed, walking over to the coffee pot to get another mug full.

“Jesus, didn’t you get enough of me last night?” Billy pressed his bare chest to Steve’s back, moving hair from his face, startling him.

“Never enough of you, pretty boy.”

*

Steve was feeling groggy, his day finally over, legs heavy as lead when he walked through the front door. He dropped his keys next to Billy’s, eyes scanning the living room for anyone. All he found was Binx, sitting on the back of the couch, pink tongue licking his paw.

“Hey buddy.” Steve reached over and picked up the cat, looking down into his yellow eyes. “Where is everyone?”

The house was dark, still as stone. The Halloween decorations him and Billy set up earlier in the day loomed, giving it an eerie atmosphere. Steve brushed it off and headed for the hallway, Binx in his arms. As he approached his bedroom, he heard the faint sounds of the television playing.

When he walked in, he could have dropped to his knees, smile spreading across his face. Riley and Billy laid on the bed, curled up together, sleeping soundly with small snores escaping. Billy’s arms were locked firmly around the small girl who had her hands tangled in his shirt, gripping it tightly. The blankets were haphazardly thrown around them, making a warm nest of quilt and pillows. The end of The Addams Family was playing on the television, credits starting to roll.

Steve heard a small meow from his hands, and he deposited Binx on the foot of the bed. He curled up, kneading the sheet gently with his claws by Billy’s feet.

After a few minutes to change, brush his teeth, and rinse the very long day off of his face, Steve crawled into bed next to them. He threw an arm over Riley, eliciting a louder snore out of Billy, feeling his breath on his own face. He tucked his daughter’s head under his chin, and shut his eyes.

Finding sleep wasn’t always easy for Steve, so he spent a lot of nights laying in bed searching for it, tossing and turning in the process.

But not tonight. Tonight, Steve faded into his dreams quickly to the smell of bubblegum shampoo and cherry Coke.

*

October 31, 1993 - Hawkins, IN

The house was buzzing with excitement, kids running around, people mingling in various rooms. Steve was looking for the extra plastic cups he bought from Melvald’s yesterday and where the fuck did he put them? The irritation was swelling, the people around him making his anxiety kick up. He huffed out a breath.

“You okay?” He turned to see Robin, prom dress on, red paint covering most of her body. He nodded his head and went back to his task, opening cabinets and drawers.

“Yeah, I just,” He slammed another cupboard, scratching his head under his sunglasses in frustration. “I can’t find the goddamn cups!” Robin took a step toward him, hand falling on his shoulder.

“Hey, take a breath.” He obeyed, finally taking a moment to appreciate her costume. He raised a brow.

“Carrie?” She smiled, putting her arms out and spinning slowly for full-effect.

“You like?” He nodded his head, snorting a laugh. “And who are you?” He looked down at his costume, which was easy to put together, given he dressed nearly the same way in high school.

“Max Dennison from Hocus Pocus.” She nodded in realization.

“And Riley is Dani?” He pointed at her.

“Bingo. Made the costume myself”

“Don’t they sell that costume at the store?”

He shrugged. “Yeah, but Riley said it was all wrong.”

She smiled and looked to the living room where Billy was standing, drink in hand while talking to Joyce, pieces of fake, rotting flesh on his gray painted face, dark, mussed up wig on his head. She raised an eyebrow.

“And Billy is…” She trailed off.

“Billy the Zombie.” Steve said matter-of-factly. She chuckled and looked back at him.

“Love it.” Her eyes glanced to Gina, her girlfriend of three years now, fondness in her eyes. “You know, we did pretty good, Harrington. After everything that happened at Starcourt, I really wasn’t sure, but,” She looked back at him. “I’m proud of us.” He beamed, reaching an arm around her shoulders.

“Me too, Robs.”

*

“Riley! Riley! Riley!” Everyone in the house was chanting, Nancy avidly staring at her wristwatch.

“Ten more seconds!”

“C’mon Riles! You got this!” Billy was cheering from the side of the bucket where Riley’s head was submerged, pulling apples out with her teeth and hoisting them into the bowl next to it. Steve counted eight so far, and for only having one minute, he was thoroughly impressed.

“Time!” Nancy called out and Riley’s head popped up, one last apple in her mouth, and the house roared in excitement. Steve grabbed her by the shoulders.

“You did it! You beat Hopper!” Jim was standing behind him, towel around his neck and fake disappointment on his face.

“She must have cheated.” Billy clapped him on the shoulder and laughed.

“Don’t be a sore loser, Dad. It’s not easy, beating an eight year old at bobbing for apples.”

Steve laughed and helped Riley dry her face. Her grin was 1000 watts of sugar, and her hair was dripping onto her dress.

“Daddy, did I do a good job?” He rubbed her hair between the soft towel.

“You were great, baby. I’m so proud!” She lunged at him, arms wrapping his neck in a grip that would strangle him if she wasn’t so small. Her voice was quiet in his ear.

“Thank you so much, Daddy. This is the best Halloween ever.” He squeezed her, shutting his eyes and feeling the lump forming in his throat. He pulled her back and looked at her, face bright and eyes lit with everything he never knew he needed in his life.

“Thank you, Riles. For everything.”

[saywhatjessie]

Red Eye, Code Blue

Written for Aspec 2019. 5.5k (Ao3)

Things had never been easy between Steve and Tony. They were pitted against each other from the get-go: the soldier and the guy who couldn’t stop railing against the military. Steve, at one point, had also been the guy who railed against the military but he felt like he had the right, actually serving in it, after all.

They didn’t keep that from letting them work together. They bickered and battled bad guys. They took cheap shots at each other and incapacitating shots at their enemies. They got along best when they were fighting someone else.

But that had been before the Accords.

Steve remembered being back in that room in Bucharest. One of Howard’s fancy pens in his hand, the accords stacked on the table both a threat and a lifeline.

“I'm not saying it's impossible, ” He’d said “but there would have to be safeguards.”

Tony had all but leapt at that. A light in his eyes that made Steve feel like maybe he was making the right call.

“Sure! Once we put out the PR fire, those documents can be amended. I'd file a motion to have you and Wanda reinstated–”

“Wanda? What about Wanda?”

And they’d fought again. Tony was keeping a kid prisoner and he didn’t think Steve would have a problem with it.

“She’s a kid! ”

“Give me a break!” Tony had yelled. “I'm doing what has to be done . . . to stave off something worse.”

Steve had clenched his jaw, looking from Tony to the expensive fountain pen in his hand.

“You keep telling yourself that.”

He’d put the pen down on the table, the clack of the metal on the wood loud as a gunshot in the tension of the room.

He went to turn around but something stopped him. To stave off something worse…

He turned back around. “Tony, I have to tell you something. ”

And he’d told Tony about his parents. About what really happened on that dark and snowy road in 1991.

Tony didn’t take it well, gasps of ‘no’ escaping him, leaning against the conference table for support as Steve told his story. His face had collapsed in shock and grief and then in hurt and rage. By the time Steve had finished, Tony tried pushing past Steve out of the conference room. Steve had had to grab onto him to keep him.

“He’s downstairs! The guy who killed my mom is downstairs. I need to– I have to– ” Tony all but sobbed, trying to push himself out of the hold Steve had taken him in. 

Steve was a super soldier. He could keep Tony contained until he had time to calm down.

After a couple moments of weak straining, Tony slumped in Steve’s arms. Steve ran a hand over his back, attempting to comfort, but Tony pushed against him, a silent plea for release.

Steve had let him go and he’d collapsed into a chair, his head in his hands.

“Get out .” Tony had said.

Steve had just looked at him. 

“How long have you known and you didn’t tell me?” Tony had asked. Steve’s face had gone a bit strained and Tony had shaken his head. “I can’t look at you right now. We can stay at this compound as long as it takes to get these accords signed but I can’t worry about that right now. I need–” He’d swallowed. “Get out. ”

So Steve had gotten out. He’d gone back to the conference room Sam was being housed in and shook his head when he’s asked what was wrong. He hadn’t wanted to talk about it.

In the end, Steve was glad he’d said it. Bucky had been reprogrammed, they’d had to break out of the building, Steve had to pull down a helicopter with his bare hands.

They’d fought at the airport – Tony maybe fighting more aggressively than he normally would have, but he hadn’t been fighting to kill. 

And when Zemo had played them that video, after they’d escaped to Siberia, Tony knew what it would be. He’d looked away. Steve had been glad for it.

“I knew that already,” Tony had growled through gritted teeth. “I know what he’s done. You can’t distract me. ”

And they’d brought Zemo in. And on the flight back to the States, Tony slapped down the accords, throwing a Bic ballpoint pen at his chest.

“Sign. ” He’d spat.

And Steve had signed.

And Steve was happy he’d at least staved off something worse.

It had not been as easy as Steve signing and they were off the hook. The other Avengers who’d fought with Steve had still been on the raft, and Bucky was still a security risk. But with Steve now backing the Accords and with Tony willing to fight for the defecting Avengers, those things had been handled. Messily and tirelessly but handled. As Tony kept reminding everyone, “We have bigger threats, people, come on.”

Things hadn’t been easy to start with, so of course, now that things were worse, they had to get trapped in an elevator together on their way out of the police station.

Being trapped with Tony Stark, it was hard to remember those bigger threats. Especially when Tony kept sneering at him.

“You’re a mechanic,” Steve groaned. “Can’t you fix it?”

Tony threw a glare at him, fingers already working to pry open the control panel. “I have multiple PhDs in quantum mechanics, electrical and mechanical engineering, and physics. You can’t just call me a mechanic.”

“You call yourself a mechanic! I’ve heard you do it!”

“Yes: to kids and Rhodey who I just want to see me as a normal guy. You do not get that privilege. To you, I am not a normal guy. I am your god.”

Steve snorted, crossing his arms and leaning dramatically against the wall of the elevator.

They’d come down to the police station to work on getting Avengers clearances for one of their Thanos contingency plans. There was a lot they still didn’t  know and even more that they could do nothing about but Tony had started working on systems of evacuation and defense that he needed a lot of tech and a lot of crossing international borders for.

Steve had gone with him so they could put up a united front. The Avengers were Back and ready to Take Down Evil and Need Your Support so Please Do What We Say.

It was still a slow process; this was their third time coming to the police building that month. Tony had made an innocuous comment about the shitty elevator last visit.

And, you know, Murphy’s Law.

Tony swore, shaking out his hand. It looked like his nail had bent back.

“Don’t you have any of your fancy gadgets that could break that open?”

Tony turned another heated glare on him. “I checked all Iron Man tech at the door in an effort of good will.”

Steve raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t sneak anything in? It’s not like they would know.”

Tony opened his mouth before closing it and taking a deep breath through his nose.

“Good. Will.” He ground out, through gritted teeth. “I’m a man of my word. Trying to be honorable , here.”

Steve’s head jerked back. Sounded to him like Tony was implying he, Steve, wasn’t honorable. Which was complete horse-shit.

But before Steve could snipe back, Tony stood up, gesturing to the panel. “It’s not like you had to check your super strength at the door so could you give me a hand, here?”

Steve scowled, but crouched by the control panel. He felt along the edges, finding a weak spot, and dug in his finger to pry it open.

He bent the metal. That was going to be harder to put back.

Tony seemed to agree because he took another hard breath through his nose.

“Whatever. Fine. If they didn’t want their control panel fucked with, they shouldn’t have such a shitty elevator.”

He pushed Steve out of the way to have better access to the circuit board and Steve felt the touch like a brand. 

Tony was always so full of passion and fury. So was Steve. It’s why they butted heads so much. But sometimes, Steve thought there might be something else to the passion and fury.

Steve stood back up to watch Tony work, leaning against the opposing wall of the elevator. Tony was glaring at the circuits through a hologram projecting on his phone. He tapped at some of the scrolling numbers and reached around the light to tweak a wire here and there.

“Thought you said you didn’t bring tech in.”

Tony growled deep in his throat. “No weapons . Nothing that could have helped me force the panel open. Shut up, I’m working.”

Steve turned his head to hide a smirk.

Tony did something then did something else and then a bunch of numbers and letters started scrolling very fast and Tony stood up, joining Steve against the elevator wall with a groan.

“Give up?” Steve asked.

Tony closed his eyes. “Friday’s running a couple diagnostics and trying to access the motor controls for the building. Fuck you.”

Steve smirked fully now. He slid along the wall so he could nudge Tony with his shoulder.

“Letting your robot do the work?”

Tony’s eyes were still closed. He let out a pained sigh. “She’s not a robot which you know because I’ve told you that at least 300 times. But, yes, Rogers, we do let robots do our work for us. That is literally why they were invented.”

Tony didn’t move away from Steve’s shoulder.

Before what the news cycle called the “Civil War”, this kind of thing had happened all the time. Steve would make sarcastic comments about Tony’s reliance on technology and Tony would take shots at Steve for being old and stuck in his ways. It had been friendly. Schoolyard shenanigans. Maybe a little pigtail pulling.

It hadn’t been as friendly lately but Tony’s shoulder still pressed to Steve’s bicep gave him a little bit of hope.

“Nothing wrong with a little bit of elbow grease, Tones. Rolling up your sleeves and doing the work yourself. That’s what your dad used to do.”

Tony’s eyes shot open, the comment about his dad the trigger pulled.

“All right, dick. You can stop pretending like you knew my father. You knew him for, what, a year in his 20s? I knew him how he actually was. He started all of the robot shit. If he could have built a robot to raise me instead of doing it himself he would have. So you can take your whole ‘what your father would have done’ bullshit and shove it because you didn’t know him. You barely know me or my work. So keep your goddamn holier-than-thou anti-technology commentary to yourself. In fact,” Tony’s voice became low and dangerous. “I’d prefer if you stopped talking altogether.”

When Tony looked at him, Steve saw fire. There was a cruel tilt to his mouth and a challenge in his eyes.

Steve leaned in.

Tony leaned away “Whoa. What the fuck?”

Steve blinked. “What?”

“Did you just try to kiss me?” The incredulousness in Tony’s face made Steve take one physical and several mental steps back.

“What?”

Tony leaned his own body back as if trying to take in Steve in the context of what had almost just happened. “Did you go in for a kiss just now? Really?”

Steve shrugged, putting on an effective air of nonchalance. “Wasn’t that where we were going?” He puts on a smirk with only half the confidence he’d felt when he leaned in the first place. “That’s how this usually goes, right? All the fighting and pigtail pulling and now we’re stuck in an elevator together?” He shrugged again. “I’ve seen the movies.”

Tony bleated a laugh, an unattractive sound. Steve’s not sure he’s ever heard Tony laugh so unrestrainedly before.

Tony put his hands on his forehead, pushing his hair back. “Oh my God, there is so much wrong with so much of what you just said. Starting with you saying you’ve ‘seen movies’.”

Steve scoffed, crossing his arms. “I’ve definitely seen movies. Nat’s been showing me.”

Tony waved him off, not bothering to entertain that line of conversation.

“That isn’t this, pal. We’re not that. I genuinely don’t like you.”

Steve rolled his eyes, slumping back against the wall again. This time Tony did move away.

“Yeah, okay,” Steve started. “Fury always said we fight like an old married couple.”

Tony shook his head. “No. Not that. Not even a little bit.” He took a deep breath and moved to stand in front of Steve, putting his hands on his shoulders and looking him in the eye. “Rogers. Steve. I need you to hear me when I say this. Are you listening?”

Steve nodded, his eyes jumping back to Tony’s mouth.

Tony smacked him weakly upside the head. “No. None of that. Look at my eyes, I need you to listen to me.”

Steve looked at Tony’s eyes. He couldn’t help but feel like this was a little romantic.

Until Tony, looking him in the eye, said, “I don’t like you. You’re mean to me, and not in a fun way. I’m working with you literally under threat of Thanos killing off half of the universe. I would not choose to be in your company if not for that.” He let go of Steve and took a step back. “You’re a bitch.”

And then he moved away, turning back to the control panel.

Steve just watched him, completely speechless, as a bunch of beeps and other mechanical sounds came from Tony’s devices. It took until Tony had worked out the problem with the elevator shuddering back into motion for Steve to ask, “What?”

Tony shrugged, closing the panel as much as he could with the dented door. “I thought we were on the same page here. I mean you did completely betray me and leave me to go and defend your buddy who killed my parents. And that was after he tried to shoot me in the face.”

“He was brainwashed ,” Steve started heatedly.

But Tony cut him off. “Yeah, and I’m using B.A.R.F. to help fix him, but getting you to let me in on that was like pulling teeth. If it had been up to you, he’d be frozen in Wakanda or something.”

Steve tried to open his mouth to defend himself again but Tony wasn’t hearing it.

“So I thought you’d made it clear to me that we weren’t friends. Why the fuck would we be anything else?”

Their elevator arrived at the ground floor and Tony was back to being all smiley once the doors opened. He charmed and schmoozed the people on the desk, apologizing for the door to the control panel and ‘I’d be happy to do a full mechanical upgrade on the building. No, really! How can we expect you to do your jobs with unreliable equipment?’

Steve tried to turn on his Captain America persona, afraid of appearing harder to work with than Tony Stark, but he was never a very good actor. He was feeling put out and unhappy and out of sorts and he knew he looked it. Most of the employees didn’t make eye contact with him as he and Tony left.

When they made it to the front steps outside the building, Tony tossed Steve the keys to the rental car they’d driven to the station.

“I don’t want to ride back with you,” he said plainly, lifting up his shirt to put the Iron Man core back to his chest where the arc reactor used to be. “So you can drive home, and I–” he pressed the mechanism and the Iron Man suit started forming around him. “-will find my own way back.”

Steve looked at the keys, his face screwed up in consternation. “Tony, wait,” he tried.

“No,” Tony said instead, moving into a crouch for takeoff, “I don’t think I will.”

“There’s really nothing here?” Steve tried anyway, not one to back down.

Tony came out of his crouch, his faceplate coming up to give Steve an almost pitying look. “No, Steve. There’s nothing there. A) Because I don’t like you and B) because I’m aro as fuck.”

Steve growled in exasperation. “Come on, Stark, you’re being difficult on purpose. What does that even mean ???”

Steve caught another of Tony’s eyerolls before the faceplate came back over his face.

“Bitch.” Tony said, and then took off.

Steve didn’t want to tell anyone about it. It was embarrassing and he still wasn’t entirely sure what had even happened.

But… he really didn’t know what the fuck had happened. He needed help.

He considered confiding in Bucky or Sam but Bucky was already going through his own thing and with Sam, sometimes it got to be a kind of echo chamber. Sam probably wouldn’t see the situation any differently than Steve did.

Natasha was an option but a) she was never as straightforward as Steve needed her to be and b) she would laugh at him. And tell everyone. For a super spy, she really was all too happy to tell Steve’s embarrassing secrets.

And, anyway, this was about Tony first and foremost. Steve hadn’t done anything wrong on his end – it was because Tony was ‘aro as fuck’, whatever that meant, that he’d rejected Steve. So Steve had to talk to someone who knew Tony and, therefore, knew what the fuck that meant.

Pepper was out. She and Tony had gone through some kind of split and were on a break or something. At least that’s what Tony had said. She’d probably know the most about what Tony had meant about being aro and how that related to not wanting to kiss Steve but he doubted she was willing to share. Also, she scared Steve, just a little.

Steve approached Colonel Rhodes at the compound. Rhodes was still working on walking, the electronic braces Tony had built helping him regain mobility, but Rhodes’s movements weren’t fluid yet. He was in the med bay, working in the PT room, when Steve found him. Steve tried not to feel like he was cornering him where he couldn’t get away.

He stood a few steps away from where Rhodes walked between the bars – hands not touching them, but hovering over in case he needed the help. There was no one spotting him which was lucky as Steve wasn’t sure he wanted an audience.

He crossed his arms and leaned against the doorway, affecting an air of casualness he didn’t feel, letting Rhodes walk toward him.

“You’re progressing really well,” Steve told him. “You should be proud.”

Rhodes rolled his eyes, taking a pause at the end of the walkway to hold onto the bars and take a breath. “I am proud. So I’m going to ignore how condescending that sounded.”

Steve held up a hand. “Sorry. I didn’t mean–”

“I know you didn’t, Cap,” Rhodes interrupted, smiling. This was already going better than Steve had expected. “What’s up?”

Steve took a breath, recrossing his arms. They were most comfortable that way. “I’m worried about Tony.”

Rhodes immediately stood up straighter, his shoulders coming back to military position. “Why? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, he’s fine, I think.” Steve sighed leaning a little bit back onto his heels. “Do you know what aro is?”

Rhodes snorted, his shoulders slumping in relief. “Yeah, fucking Tony.” He chuckled before his head jerked back up, his eyes gone a bit wide. “Wait, did you make a move on him?”

Steve’s arms tightened, his own eyes widening slightly. He hadn’t expected Rhodes to make that leap. He cleared his throat, “Why would you think–”

“You did .” Rhodes interrupted again. “You definitely did. Oh my God.” Rhodes face was spreading in a smile. “Oh my God . This is amazing.”

Steve huffed a bit, refusing to get sidetracked. “What does aro mean? Why would Tony tell me that?”

“Well I’m assuming it’s so you would leave him alone when he told you he didn’t like you.” Rhodes said, laughing under his breath. “I’m guessing you were persistent?”

Steve flexed his shoulder, refusing to answer that. “So it was an excuse?”

“No, it’s true. Tony Stark is aro as fuck .” Rhodes grinned. “But that’s not why he turned you down, whatever move you made. He just doesn’t like you.”

Steve grunted. Yes, Rhodes, he’d made that very clear. “What does aro mean?”

Rhodes shrugged, moving backwards down the padded walkway He looked down at his feet to watch his legs move awkwardly under the different kind of mobility required. “It’s short for aromantic. You can google it.” He looked up at Steve then. “Do not bother Tony about it. Leave him alone, Rogers.”

Steve sighed. “You can’t just tell me?”

Rhodes grinned at him. “Nah. You’re a smart guy – you figure it out.”

  Going to Rhodes had been a mistake. Not only because he didn’t actually get any useful information out of it, but the Colonel had also told everyone that Steve had made a move on Tony.

And everyone had found that so hilarious.

Steve had hoped Colonel Rhodes would have a little more professionalism and respect but, no, he told Happy who told Peter who told everyone , because that sticky teenager lived to, as he put, “roast America’s ass”.

Natasha kept moving boxes of tissues closer to Steve whenever Tony walked away from him. Vision had taken to playing “Careless Whisper” every time Steve entered a room. Bruce only ever looked at him now with a mix of pity and amusement which, when taken with the other things wasn’t so dramatic, but was definitely the most annoying.

He had googled ‘aromantic’ like Rhodes had suggested (Googling just ‘aro’ had done him no good previously as he’d been spelling it like ‘arrow’) but the results didn’t clear up too much. 

“ An aromantic person is someone who doesn't experience romantic attraction. There's no need for an aromantic to pair up with another person for romantic reasons.”

  But Tony had a whole slew of conquests in the past. He was famous for it. And he’d had a relationship with Pepper that was definitely more serious than the others – a romantic relationship! They had been a couple! Steve had followed the relationship from when he and Tony had met to when Tony had told them they were seperated in that conference room in Bucharest. Not that he had schemes on Tony, he was just interested in his friends.

But Tony had been in a romantic relationship and Google said that’s not what aro means. Had Tony been lying?

He thought about this every time he saw Tony walk in somewhere with Bruce tucked under his arm. He watched Tony kiss Bruce or Pepper on the cheek, heard him call people pet names like ‘dear’ or ‘honey’ or ‘sweetheart’. None of it was adding up.

It was during an Avengers Sponsored Social Charity Event – one of the efforts being made to regain the trust and faith of the public – that Steve all but convinced himself that aromanticism was fake and Tony had lied to him completely. He watched Tony slowly guide Pepper around a dance floor, a tasteful but sparkly ring on her left hand. They hadn’t officially told the rest of the team yet, but it was clear the couple were back together and now, somehow, engaged.

That is extremely romantic behavior. Marriage? Romantic.

Steve grit his teeth, his narrowed eyes locked on them as they made their way across the floor. His arms were folded so tightly it was unlikely they’d ever hang loose again.

A shorter figure slid up next to Steve, chewing sounds coming from his open mouth. “They’re cute, right?”

Steve glanced down at Peter, wearing his Spider-Man suit under his tuxedo in an effort to preserve his identity, but with his mask rolled up to expose his mouth so he could inhale the party’s hors d'oeuvres. He’d somehow procured an entire tray.

Steve just grunted in reply.

Peter popped another mini crabcake into his mouth and talked around it. Teenagers were gross.

“Yeah, Tony and Pepper make a good team. Very solid support system.” He popped another crabcake into his mouth despite not having yet swallowed the first. “She would never blame him for an international incident and then leave him to deal with the fallout in the press, including the revision of official security government documents, by himself.”

Steve glared down at the masked hero. Peter just licked grease off the fingers of his gloves. “You got something to say, kid?”

Peter shrugged, throwing a ball of crab up in the air to catch in his mouth. “I’m just saying,” he said around it. “No one who’s ever done any of those things should presume they’re entitled to any relationship with Mr. Stark. How messed up would that be? I mean could you imagine?”

Steve gaped, watching Peter dip a jumbo shrimp into some kind of white sauce. He wasn’t sure he could recall the kid ever being so disrespectful.

“You think I feel entitled ?”, he asked, annoyed at how petulant he sounded.

Steve couldn’t see through the mask, but he could guess by the bottom half of Peter’s face he was raising an eyebrow. “Which answer gets you to stop glaring at Mr. Stark like that?”

“I wasn’t–” but Steve stopped himself, because he definitely had been.

Peter smirked. “Look, Captain,” Steve was a little gratified that Peter was respectful enough not to call him Rogers like Tony did. “This whole Edward Cullen, lurking in corners and glaring menacingly at the one you adore act isn’t working for anyone.” Steve didn’t know who Edward Cullen was but he wasn’t going to bring it up. Not when he’d told Tony he’d seen movies. “It’s better if you just leave him alone.”

Steve refrained from throwing up his hands but barely. “Why does everyone keep saying that?”

That got a laugh out of Peter. “Have you thought that maybe if everyone agrees on something it’s probably true?” Then Peter’s face pulled into a grimace. “Well… considering everyone that agreed on the Accords, I guess you wouldn't, huh?”

Steve scowled at Peter. The kid had an attitude problem – Tony couldn’t be a good influence on him.

“He still didn’t have to lie to me,” Steve grumbled.

“About what?” Peter asked, fishing a stray scallop out of the dip with his still-gloved pinky. He was going to have to wash the suit, that was so gross. 

Steve twisted his face, unsure if this was appropriate to bring up with a kid. He knew times were different and Peter probably knew more about all this than he did, but he still didn’t feel comfortable discussing the romantic life of someone the kid considered a parental figure.

“Just… something he told me,” Steve hedged. “When he, uh–”

“Totally rejected you?” Peter asked, innocently.

Steve grit his teeth. “Yes. That.”

Peter nodded, popping the scallop in his mouth and chewing. Then he stopped, actually swallowing before he spoke. “Wait, is this about him being aro?”

Steve grunted. Of course Tony’s protege knew about his romantic life. Why would Tony think it’s inappropriate to share something like that with a kid?

“Mr. Stark wouldn’t lie about something like that!” Peter’s voice was getting louder, spurred by a sudden outrage. “Why do you think he lied about that?”

Steve refused to answer. He would not bitch out a fifteen-year-old.

“Do you even know what it means? Mr. Rhodey told me you asked about it. You know how to Google, right?”

“ Yes, I know how to Google,” Steve snapped. “And it said there was no reason for people who were aromantic to pair up.” He gestured to Tony and Pepper, hands clasped and slowly spinning. He was trying to say ‘They’re a couple! So ha!’ without actually saying it. It seemed a bit juvenile to say it aloud.

Even not saying it aloud must have seemed juvenile to Peter because he rubbed a hand down his face, bringing the mask back down over his mouth with it. “Oh my God , you’re so old.”

“Hey,” Steve started but Peter held up a hand to cut him off.

“No, I know, you were stuck in the ice or whatever, and there’s been a lot to catch up on. I’m not mad, I’m just frustrated. But I’d rather it be me explaining this to you than you going to bother Mr. Stark about it.”

Steve still felt indignant – why did people believe he would bother Stark? – but it looked like he was finally getting an explanation so he valiantly kept his mouth shut.

Peter quietly flagged down a waiter and passed him the mostly empty tray, thanking him politely. He shook out his arms, turning back to Steve. “I don’t know why, I just felt like I needed my hands for this.”

Steve crossed his arms and waited.

Peter sighed. “So aromanticism is a lack of romantic attraction.”

Steve nodded. He knew that already.

“Which means Mr. Stark doesn’t get the mushy feelings or feel butterflies and all the good soft shit that comes with being in a relationship.”

Steve almost said ‘language’ but heroically resisted.

“ But ,” he said “Mr. Stark still has a lot of love in his heart and was critically under-hugged as a kid so he always makes sure to show his love like that. He’s… what did MJ call it…” Peter waved his hands around his head as if trying to catch the word he was looking for out of his brain. He snapped his fingers but it was muffled by the gloved of the suit. “Tactile!”

Steve nodded, remembering all the times Tony used to clap him on the shoulder or offer him snacks. Before, he’d used that as evidence for why he and Tony were headed somewhere romantic. But, if he’d really been paying attention, he’d have realized Tony did that for everyone.

“Full disclosure: I’m not aro and do not speak for all aros. Every aro is different, blah blah blah, disclaimer disclaimer.” Peter waved his hands, vaguely, making Steve glad he’d given the tray back. “You’re not going to find every aro is so free with cheek smooches.”

Steve nodded, his mind conjuring all those instances again of Tony pet-naming Rhodey or cheek-smooching Bruce. It put to mind something he’d read when he’d googled ‘aromantic’, but hadn’t really thought much about:

   “Aromantics are capable of feeling love - platonic love such as that between a mother and child or best friends is still love.”

  Wording it like that made it seem so obvious to Steve: of course aromantic people could feel love. It was a basic human emotion! Anyone who couldn’t feel love was a sociopath and Steve didn’t think Tony was a sociopath.

And even beyond that, he knew Tony could love. He saw how he behaved with Rhodes and Happy – the kind of fatherly love he had for Peter. 

And Steve guessed Tony could feel platonic love for Pepper. They may be a couple – an engaged couple – and Pepper could feel romantically about him, but Tony’s feelings could be totally platonic.

But– “Then why is he marrying her?” Steve asked, hoping he sounded more confused than whiney.

Peter shrugged, the eyes of his mask going a little scrunched as he smiled. “They make a good team,” he said, repeating his earlier sentiment. “They both wanted kids and they take care of each other.” He chuckles under his breath. “Also, I’m pretty sure Tony wants to make sure that Pepper is entitled to half his money.” He shrugged. “It makes sense.”

Steve nodded. He really was starting to feel better about this whole thing.

“I think I’m beginning to understand,” he mused. “Getting married to Pepper isn’t the same thing as making out with me in an elevator.”

Peter burst out laughing. “Oh my God , is that what happened? You tried to make out with him in an elevator?” Peter cackled.

Steve crossed his arms tighter, narrowing his eyes. “Yes, but it’s fine. You just explained–”

“Captain Rogers – Steve – no. Mr. Stark still likes,” he choked a bit on the word, “sex and stuff. He’s aromantic, not asexual. He just doesn’t want to fuck you .”

Now Steve was offended again. He spluttered a bit, trying to find words.

Peter was still laughing but he held up a hand to explain, “Well, some people are aromantic and asexual, but Mr. Stark isn’t. If he liked you, he would have no problem making out with you. He just really doesn’t like you.”

Steve threw up his hands, completely giving up.

He walked out of the ballroom, leaving Peter laughing behind him and Tony dancing, completely oblivious of everything Steve had just learned.

Tony was just out there existing however he goddamn pleased.

Whatever.

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

CSUAVS prt 13 start... middle...

Floating in space, Lance had found the small shower on the pod he'd lifted. Between the control room and the pod was a blur. A literal blur. He remembered shooting the control panels until they sparked up, but couldn't remember making his way down to the pod, nor escaping Klearo's ship before it exploded. When he came too, he'd found himself floating. His body too tender to move from the cold floor, as everything else came back with frightening clarity. This wasn't what was supposed to happen. They said that pride came before the fall, and now he'd fallen so low he didn't know how he was supposed to recover. His skin itched, his hair stank, his body covered in God only knew what... and between his legs... raising a hand, his eyes widened at the dried blood. He'd... shot... everyone... Curling in on himself he started to scream. His voice wrecked from everything else he'd been through. Appearing beside him, Allura stroked his hair. Her soft voice telling him to let go. When his tears dried, he gathered himself up. Stripping off the layers of soiled clothes until he was naked again. These small pods were used from ship to planet transport, they held the very basics. That's why there was a small first aid kit, a blanket, a change of clothes and tiny bathroom area on each pod. Klearo expected his minions to be spotless and prim each time they appeared before an audience. He owed him nothing, and if he was in the right frame of mind he might even laugh over the fact the man was so prepared as he stepped into his first shower in movements. The heat of the water falling around him felt like razor blades against his skin. His bloodied and bleeding backside the worst of all his injuries. His nails scraping the fragile scabby skin in his desperation to rid himself of what was left inside. Blood swirling through the brown tinged water as silent tears formed again. How was he supposed to ever go home after this? How did he smile again? How did he hold his head high and ignore the pain? Rubbing his skin until the flesh felt so raw it no longer existed, he couldn't get clean. He could feel those large hands pining down his hips. The hands holding his mouth open, a bleeding mouth from where the gag tore at his skin didn't appeal to his holders. It didn't matter. Once he screamed himself out, they stopped gagging him in favour of covering his mouth with their sweaty palms. If he closed his eyes, he'd be slapped for misbehaving. Yet that wasn't what really broke him. What broke him was Allura watching the whole time. Her standing there with no words of comfort, or attempt to interfere. It wasn't like he'd been raped by that many member of Klearo's bizarre cult. Only three or four Galra, and the man himself. The rest preferred to be there while he was tortured. Laughing as he pissed himself in fear. Laughing as they threatened his friends. His family. To leak the videos of their time together. Staying there long after the water went cold, he wasn't ready to leave the safety of the small space. There was barely enough space to sit, but with three solid metal walls, and glass screen in front of him, the space was small and safe. He was still there when the Erathian police boarded the stolen pod. Klearo had reported his ship having been attacked by "space pirates", so when they'd finally tracked down one of the pods, they were eager to apprehend whoever was inside. This was when he met Kre'el. The woman looked like angel in his broken mind. Soft honey blonde hair, blue shimmering eyes, a nose like a pig's... he didn't care. She wasn't a full Galra, and she wasn't there to hurt him. Unable to communicate that he'd been the one to destroy the ship, he was moved from pod to the main ship. From there he was returned to Erathus, where his journey had begun. Organising for him to call his mother, Kre'el sat by his side as he bullshitted his arse off about how well the job had gone. She was concerned enough as it was. Three movements. He'd only left Earth a phoeb ago. His mind couldn't process it. It'd felt like years. How could someone break from something so brief? He felt weak. Weak and worthless. He ended the call with a heavy heart. As he passed the black communicator back to Kre'el, she shook her head and insisted he keep it, because she may have a job for him. The last thing he wanted a was a job. He didn't even want to be, yet, due to her soft ways, Kre'el was the first friend he made at the Erathian police department. Released from hospital only three short days later, Lance was picked up Kre'el and one of her coworkers. Taken from the hospital to the police station, he was slightly lost as to why he was there. Scared by the sheer amount of people, by the Galra looking his way, he'd learned that scent seemed to be particularly appealing to that of the Galra and when one moved to approach him, he damn near screamed. God. He knew he looked so lame. He was filled with anger and fear. Telling himself that Lance went through it all, not Leandro wasn't working as well as it had on Klearo's ship. Under the fluorescent lights of the building he was very clearly a victim, the one thing he didn't want people to see. Whether they thought it or not, neither officer said anything as they continued through the building, both walking slow to keep up him on his crutches. An elevator up to another floor, another long corridor and with no idea how to escape, their snail like pace finally came to end in front of a grey door. For a moment Lance blanched. The plainness of the door reminding him of the plainness of his cell. Opening the door for him, Kre'el waited for him to limp in, before her partner came in to join him. Across half the wall were photos of Klearo. Photos of him, and the rest of the man's security team. Boxes of documents lay around half packed, as Lance simply stared in shock. Klearo's name had gone unsaid. How he'd ended up how he had, went unsaid. The roughness of his voice explained by a long night, to his mother at any rate "Wha... what is all of this?" "An investigation into Klearo. Please take a seat, former Paladin Lance. We need to talk" "Helo, you're going to scare him off before we've even had time to talk. You're not the best at conversations. Lance, take a seat please. You're probably really confused, and you're probably the only one who can help at the moment" Lance. He didn't want to be Lance. Lance was a loser, Touching his tender throat, he coughed "Leandro... it's my proper name" "Leandro then. Helo is a little socially stunted. Helo, why don't you pick up his things from lock up? I'll begin explaining things to him" Helo sighed at Kre'el. The blue skinned alien seemed smitten by the female officer. There was no malice as he replied "You should have told me while we were downstairs. Now I have to go all the way back down" "Ensuring La-Leandro's security came first. This hasn't exactly been sanctioned by our boss" Shrugging his shoulders, Helo kept his steps light as he moved across the room. Lance's heart starting to race at how soundless the movement was. If he wanted, Lance was sure Helo could kill him before he even knew what had happened "It's your arse, not mine" "Thank you!" Kre'el waited until the door was closed again before sitting down next to him so their knees were nearly touching "I know you've been through a lot, but I first want you to know you are under no obligation to talk about whatever happened on that ship. As you can see, we've been investigating Klearo for some time. On the surface he presents himself as an ambassador, travelling from planet to planet to talk about peace now that the Galra reign has ended. Underneath we have confirmation that he's involved in everything. Guns. Drugs. Weapons. Child trafficking. We are also aware of his almost fanatical desire to possess on of Voltron's Lions as his own" So everyone but him had known? The police had known... and... done nothing? The man was pure evil... and they'd let him walk? His fingertips dug into his palms. Why hadn't anyone told? "We want to help you with your mission" Lance's head snapped up. His mission? Tilting his head sideways, he drew his brow "You were working to bring down Klearo, weren't you? You one piloted the Red Lion. The object of his desire, though if you ask me, I think he would have taken any lion could have gotten his hands on" If Kre'el hadn't been so kind, he probably would have lied... Allura didn't seem to like her as much as he did "N-no. I was hired for security before I realised something was wrong" It was a half lie. To cover what he'd been through... "Oh. You did take out his ship, however?" Nodding, he felt a little less stupid... ever so slightly less stupid "Leandro. What I want to ask is for your help. As police, we can't move like you can. We have to uphold the law, while letting someone like him go as he is an ambassador. I talked to my boss over this, but he thought you were on Klearo's payroll. He wanted to arrest you for your involvement in a hijacking that occurred last movement. Once I saw you for my self, I knew someone like you couldn't have been involved. A brave Paladin could never be involved. Especially as we'd recovered your belongings from Klearo's residence" "You don't know me" "I don't need to. Being part Galra myself, I've seen what they can do first hand. The day Voltron took the skies again was the happiest day of my life" Blurting out his question, Lance then dissolved into coughs "You're part Galra?!" "Yes. Not by choice. That's part of the reason I am coming to you. Klearo needs to be stopped, and we need an agent who can move freely" Agent... that's what he'd foolishly let himself be called and talked himself up as "An agent?" "A bounty hunter as such. We can set you up with a room through a local establishment" Shaking his head, Lance didn't know what to do next, only that he didn't trust the idea of working for someone again so soon "I can't..." "I saw your medical file. I know what you went through. You aren't the only one he's done this to. Can you really live with that? Even if you're done with him, he isn't done with you. He still wants a lion to secure his position. What if he goes after your friends? Or the Atlas? Your former Black Paladin is at its helm" He didn't want that. He didn't want anyone to suffer the shame he did. Or this festering, aching anger. Swallowing awkwardly, his eyes grew teary, his nails starting to cut into his palms. Because he'd been fed that weird yellow drug for so long, the hospital needed to wean him off slowly so he barely felt the deep divots "No... no... tell me what you need me to do" "You're being very brave, Leandro. I wish I had the time to take things slow with you. As it is..." "It's fine. Things were never that slow when I was in Voltron" He couldn't take sympathy or pity. If he stopped and waited again, he'd be responsible for what happened next "Alright. I understand. Helo is retrieving your belongings, then I'll take you to you the club. You'll be given a room there while I organise things on this end. You need official permission to take on bounty hunting, a police sponsor so to speak. We've been taken off the case, so I will be liaising with you in an official capacity for now. We may also ask that take on smaller cases. Arrests. Captures. Erathus has developed rapidly in the last two years, meaning we don't have the ability to be everywhere at once" "I don't care. I mean... I don't mind. As long as I can be useful" "Very useful. I won't ask for your trust, but I promise to always shoot straight" It was half a tick for Lance to realise she meant "she'd shoot straight from the hip" or "talk straight". All this bounty hunter thing felt like a Hollywood movie... He'd take a little glamour right about. Plus he needed all the resources he could gather if he was going to hunt down and gut Klearo. Kre'el was in the right position to help him... she'd also said she didn't expect trust, because he honestly wasn't sure he had any of that left. Standing behind him, Allura tried to dissuade him. She'd become more vocal in her protests of his actions, as if she was actually his ex. Nodding, Kre'el relaxed "Excellent. I'll take this as a formal agreement. Is there anything you need right now?" "Do you know anyone who can help hide these marks? They're hardly covert" "I think we can find some way to help with that. Are they functional?" They functioned as a reminder that his body was all kinds of wrong... "No. A reminder of the past" "Perhaps the hospital help? You have follow up appointments booked" "I won't need them. My body is different" "Are you sure?" "I'm sure" He was sure he didn't want to be touched. He didn't want to be examined. He didn't want to wake up screaming and scare everyone around. Holding her hand out, Lance nearly vomited as he shook it. Definitely a big fat no to physical contact "Thank you, Leandro. I look forward to working with you" * Lance hadn't expected to be living in a strip club when he'd moved to Erathus. Nor did he think he'd ever be labelled a prostitute. The second and third floors of the establishment he now called home were designated for such things. At first he couldn't sleep knowing people were doing "that" right beyond the doors to his room. Kre'el was friends with the owner, who was her cousins uncle's something or other on her father's side... it was long an complicated, but he got it. Everyone back home was family, no matter how many branches away they hung on the family tree. If it wasn't for Helo though, he probably would have still been holed up in his room, playing "Lance" who was perfectly happy and healthy. It was another sleepless night where the drugs he'd been given by the hospital were proving worthless in his blood system when there came a loud knock on his door. Pulling his recovered blaster out, the only thing he'd saved from the stuff he'd brought from earth... other than a photo of Varadero which was a whole other story, Lance cautiously crept over to his door as the stupid thing opened on its own. He hated that. He hated knowing anyone could let themselves in, yet it seemed some unwritten rule of the establishment that you didn't. A rule that was surprisingly followed. With a heft alien in his hold and his pants undone, Helo grunted a hello as he dragged the alien into Lance's space. Behind the pair of them was a tiny female alien. Her lip bloodied as she trembled. Looking at her was like looking at himself. Even if touch revolted him, he couldn't let her stand there. Opening the bathroom door, he retrieved the thin bathrobe, offering it to her as she eyed him in confusion "It's alright. You can come in. I'm Leandro" The alien woman smiled, covering herself with robe "Leah... you're the new one?" "In a way. Come through. He's an officer" Pining the suspect down on Lance's bed with knee, Helo struggled to keep him down "Leandro, back pocket" Right. That was him. His mind didn't need to be reminding him of how that position felt. Moving to Helo, he moved the man's jacket back to find a black tranq gun "Hit him in the neck" Between Helo and the alien called Leah, Lance was imploding over having three people suddenly forced into his space. Wanting them out, he did as he was told. A small rush of satisfaction coming as he pushed the muzzle to the aliens neck and squeezed. A few ticks later, the alien stopped his struggling. Wiping his brow, Helo stood back "Thanks. I had my hands full. Didn't expect to find him here" "Who is "he"? And do I want to know why your pants are undone?" Rushing to pull his fly up, Helo held his hand out for his gun "Drug deal. He mistakingly thought hitting the money meant he could hit a dancer. I'll call someone to come collect him" Helo failed at even basic politeness. Leah was still looking tiny "Are you alright?" "I... yes. Sometimes they get a little too forceful. I'm fine, thanks to you and your friend" "That's good. Sorry about, Helo. He forgets how to talk to people from time to time" Leah's face brightened "I was worried I was in trouble too" "A pretty lady like you, no. No, just this piece of quiznak here. You might want to take the night off though" "I think I will. Thank you, Leandro" The look Helo gave him was pointedly ignored as Leah let herself out, and despite the fact all he did was tranq the guy, it was listed as his first official assist as a bounty hunter. Leah was the first prostitute he met. It was her who introduced him to the others. They were the ones who taught him the ins and outs of the club, and the ones who introduced him to the "not so legal" doctor that helped the workers there. She showed him around Erathus, and where to get everything he could want or need in the way of clothes and food. It was also around that time that Kre'el and Helo both started reaching out to him, over who to keep an eye out for in the club. It wasn't getting him any closer to Klearo. The source of his anger and hatred, but making friends opened a whole new world to him. He could hold his own on a call with the old members of Voltron, Keith too when his previous best friend called... which was depressingly rare. It wasn't like any of them bothered to reply to his messages anymore. Even taking calls from home left him feeling depressed. He called Veronica regularly, knowing that if he didn't she'd bring the Atlas and that would cause way more dramas than it was worth. She was also the only one who didn't constantly ask how he was. No, she went around the side of issue by asking how work was. It was... good. He could go down to the club and have a few drinks, knowing that the bouncers would stop anything happening on the dance floor from going further. It still took movements to be confident enough to do so. But he had a job now. He had work being pushed his way, slowly but surely he was getting there. That didn't mean he liked to be touched. Some quintants he couldn't even get out of bed. Some quintants he'd spend the whole day in the shower. Yet most quintants he could be found charting Klearo's every single move. His anger at the man's continued existence only grew. With too many feelings and no way to vent them, he slipped up badly. Leah had found him. High out of his mind, Lance lost control on the thin thread of sanity he still held. He'd taken almost everything he could get his hands on, but it hadn't been enough to rid his mind and body of the feel of what happened. It'd started when he'd punched the mirror in his bathroom in anger over the face reflected back at him. The dark bags under his red eyes, the paleness of his usually glowing skin. The feel of the glass embedded in his knuckles had felt more than nice. Before he'd thought things through, or could think things through, he'd fished a larger chunk of mirror from his sink. Dragging it across the tender skin of his wrist, he relished the feeling of pain rushing to bloom. He felt... finally in control. Laughing in maniacal glee, he stumbled from his bathroom. Oblivious to how much he was bleeding. In the end he barely made it five steps before collapsing. When he came too, he was laying in his own bed. Leah sitting in a dining chair about a foot away. Her eyes red and puffy from where she'd been crying. Confused over everything that had happened, he only grew more confused as he noticed the right bandage around his left wrist. Leah hadn't been happy. Ignoring the way she'd carefully avoided touching him before, she'd angrily snatched up his hand to tear the bandage off. Only, when she did, the skin beneath had healed. A small scar the only evidence he'd done something wrong. Leah couldn't understand it, while he had no explanation to offer. He'd never expected her to be as upset as she was. It'd taken vargas for her to truly calm and accept he hadn't attempted to take his life. She watched him carefully after that. Things strained in a way he didn't like, and in a way that finally pushed him to ask Kre'el for more diverse work. He'd saved up enough for a tiny pod of his own. He could finally go after Klearo... and he really needed off Erathus. A break from ruining the lives of people he'd come to care about. Kre'el was against it. Helo wanted to come with him as back up. Neither got their wish. He had to do this for himself. He had to rip open the wound the man had left inside of him, and drain the infection before he was lost to himself entirely. Buying the pod he'd been eying off filled him with pride. It wasn't the Atlas, nor was it Keith's humanitarian aid ship. Quiznak. It wasn't even a great ship, but no one could take it from him, and once he'd moved everything he'd needed from his room, including his research on Klearo's movements, he took the first wormhole he could off planet.

[writefasttalkevenfaster]

Michael Cutter / Always

Can I request a Michael cutter x reader? Maybe where the reader is an undercover detective and Mike and her go to some fancy formal event and he has never seen her in anything but her usual suit or uniform and he sees her and is just in awe? Maybe a bonus if she has to whip out a her closed-carry pistol from a thigh holster and mike almost melts?

This literally took me months. Months. I had a hard time with this prompt. I don't know why?? But I finally finished!! I hope you all enjoy. I got some Sherlock coming soon, as well as maybe some Harry Hart (and of course, Hotch and Raf aren’t going anywhere either). 

“I look ridiculous,” Your voice floated through the bathroom, as Connie stood guard for you, her heel clicking impatiently for you. You weren’t sure how you even ended up in this position. You were a cop, not a bachelorette. “Why am I the one who has to do this?”

“Because I don’t have a license to carry a gun,” Connie reminded you, and you scoffed, as you pulled on the last touch: a pair of black heels longer than your arm.

“And red is just not my color,” Kevin quipped, as you could hear Cyrus laugh at that and you shook your head, not able to suppress a chuckle at the thought of Kevin in red. Yikes.

“A blue would definitely suit you more, Bernard, you too, Y/N.” And you could almost see the teasing grin scrawled across his face.

“I’ll have you in this dress in a minute, Lupo,” You called out, cutting his laughter short, as you did your final adjustments.

“Stop complaining, detective,” You heard Michael Cutter’s mirthless voice cut through the chuckles, “You’re not the only one unhappy with the current arrangement,” His tone was downtrodden, as you could practically hear his patience thinning, waiting for you in his monkey suit, as he called it. You didn’t know what the man was complaining out, he wore suits all day long, and was forced to attend these galas twice a month, and yet here he was throwing a fit. “Could we hurry this along? I rather get out of his monkey suit before my funeral.”

“You’re not the one who had to wear the ten inch heels so grow some patience before I find another place for these,” You growled out from the stall, as you slipped on the very shoes you had threatened him with. Cutter truly grated your nerves, and the feeling was absolutely mutual. His conniving, brash, and strongarm methods didn’t sit well with you, while your own unwillingness to do his bidding didn’t sit well with him. Well, you supposed it was more than that, but you couldn’t care less at this point. Finally, you had gotten your bearings with the shoes, taking two careful steps in the stall. “Fine, I’m ready,”

You opened the door, walking out carefully. The long crimson silk gown, which had brushed against the floor before, now floated by your feet because of the sheer length of the heels. The gown itself was off the shoulder, your long tresses flowing over your bare shoulders. The dress itself was comfortable enough, the flowy, silky material a nice change from the suit you wore every day. You found four pair of eyes staring at you, as they took in your appearance with various degrees of shock, with Cutter being at the extreme end of the spectrum. His eyes were glued to you as Bernard and Lupo went over to you to nudge, wink, and tease.

“Damn Y/N, you clean up nice,” Kevin exclaimed with a whistle, as Lupo and Connie both agreed while you rolled your eyes at them, a bit disconcerted by the attention. Kevin glanced at Cutter who was still staring, “Close your mouth counselor, you’ll catch flies,”

His words forced Cutter shake himself out his thoughts, glancing away with a scowl. “We should head out, we’re getting late, unless you have anymore wisecracks, detective,”  

Lupo shrugged, “Well actually-”

“That’s enough,” Connie cut through with a sharp remark, her heel clicking against the tile. “You two are going to be late!” She shooed the detectives out, as they catcalled one last time, leaving you and Cutter alone for a moment. His eyes seemed to glance everywhere, besides your general direction, something you found quite intriguing, not to mention entertaining. The famous Michael Cutter tripped up by a mere detective in heels?

Blasphemy.

“See something you like, counselor?” You remarked, as you brushed past him to follow Connie, sparing a single glance to see his reddened cheeks and a miserable attempt at rolling his eyes, but he hadn’t denied it, much to your surprise. The two of you hadn’t gotten off on exactly the right foot when you first started as a detective, not with his rash decision making and impassioned speeches, none of which you had any patience for. No, in fact his brashness irritated you to no end, just as much as it did his boss, who you had spoken to on several occasions, none of which were helpful.  “Let’s get a move on.”

And you still felt him stare for a minute, before following your orders.

“We can’t sit here the whole night, Michael,” You couldn’t risk blowing your cover by calling him by his last name, but hell if you would call him Mike. “We have to go onto the dance floor.” Your hands were on your hips, sighing internally at the situation before you - begging Michael Cutter to dance with you. It wasn’t exactly a shining moment.

“Y/N, I don’t dance, I told you,” And you were starting to get ticked off, the irritation growing more and more evident, but you knew this wouldn’t work. Unfortunately, you couldn’t merely drag him onto the floor, you needed to appeal to him somehow. He leaned against the wall, pulling on his bowtie.

You leaned beside him, your shoulder brushing against his own. “Do you want to nail this guy or not?” You sighed, looking over at him, and he begrudgingly nodded, so you offered your hand, “Come on, I’ll lead, pretty boy.”

“That’s pretty man to you,” And you couldn’t help but note how his hand fit around your own, enveloping you in his warmth, a sensation that sent shivers up your spine. “Let’s get this over with.”

“Just what I love to hear,” Your arms were placed around his neck, while his rested above your waist, near the small of your back, and in this moment, you finally could really look at Assistant District Attorney Michael Cutter. He wasn’t as jaded as he wanted those around him to see. No. The person staring back at you was vulnerable, tentative, but you didn’t to admit you knew why. “I’m guessing you don’t go to these things very often.”

He shrugged, taking a quick glance around, leaning in closer, so his lips were practically beside your ear, “Not exactly my scene,”

You chuckled at his 009 impression, or rather his failed attempt at being coy, “I couldn’t tell,” You tilted your head, much to his obvious confusion. You shook your head, “I just thought, if you want to be DA, you’re going to have to go to a lot of these.”

“I know,” He trailed off, before giving a heavy sigh, “but I’ll enjoy this one being my last one for a while.”

“Well then, please remember the woman who escorted you on your first time,” And he coughed, as your face burned as the implication of your words unraveled upon you, “I didn’t mean -”

He waved you off, “I know what you meant, and thank you, I suppose you wouldn’t be available for one about three years from now?” And you opened your mouth for another snappy retort, but none came, instead you found yourself hesitating. But you didn’t know why.

“Wait, our target,” You whispered, and you watched them walk into a separate room, “Let’s go.” Cutter eyed the bustling ballroom of dancers, “walking around will take too long.”

“How do we get through?” You tugged on his hand, navigating the both of you as you slipped beside, between, and sometimes through, couples. The two of you had reached the door soon enough, and you pulled him close by the collar, and you felt his heart rate pick up, chest against chest, your hand around his wrist. “What are you doing?” He breathed, as his back hit the wall next to the doors, as you pulled at his collar.

“Giving us an excuse to get into that room,” His eyes seemed to widen with the realization of what you were going to do, giving his consent with the shutting of his eyes. And with no hesitation, your lips were on his, burning. Your lips were insistent, pushing the atmosphere to the brink of impropriety, and the odd thing was that you did not want to stop. His lips were firm against your relentless attacks, matching aggression for aggression, and his hands helped, firmly pulling you against him. And you broke the kiss, still staring at him, but leading his eyes to the door handle, which he opened, and you followed him in. The two of you fell silent, though your hands remained entangled in one another’s.

You crept on your target, the New York State Attorney. He had been involved in some flanderous deals, and had slipped away from them one too many times with smooth words and hardhanded connections. But he couldn’t slip away this time, you both had caught him exchanging money with the head of a drug cartel, and you had it all on video, captured courtesy of the New York Police Department and Cutter’s cellphone. You both moved back, not wanting to cause a scene, when your heel hit the marble floor wrong.

“Who’s there?” You heard a gun cock.

“Are you crazy? Put that th-” Silence.

You pushed Mike back, reaching under your dress to pull a gun from a hidden holster. And the man was met with a gun to his head. “NYPD. Drop your weapon, now.”

“Thank god,” He sighed in relief, pushing back the smile on his face, concealed with horror, “this man was trying to kill me. He had followed up in here, and pressed the gun to my back.”

“Save it, Jackson,” Cutter stepped out, hands in his pocket, “It’s over.”

And as you pulled out another pair of handcuffs, police filed in, including Lupo and Bernard, who took the two away. The both of you were checked for injuries, but the worst of it were your bruised lips, which Mike noted with a wry smile, as the two of you bustled into a cab to the precinct.

“Watch it counselor, or I might do a lot worse to you next time,”

“Next time?” He raised an eyebrow.

“The offer for five years from now still stands, doesn’t it?” His smile was wide now, as his hand pulled you to his side, and he paused before your lips, as he waited for you, and for your answer. And you kissed him again, feeling his arms wrap around you in earnest. He pulled away, as he brushed his thumb across your cheek.

“Always.”

[mettic]

Mettic’s OFFICIAL VIDEO GAME AWARDS for TWENTY SEVENTEEN

Because my opinions are IMPORTANT

GAME OF THE YEAR:

PAPER MARIO THE THOUSAND YEAR DOOR

this game still kicks ass baby!!!!!!

GAME THAT SWINDLED ME OF MY MONEY THE HARDEST:

FATE/EXTELLA

You know honestly I was enjoying this game a fair amount when I was playing it. It’s a musou but sometimes you just need some musou in your life. Plus I enjoyed the sort’ve macro aspect of the game, and some characters with fun gimmicks (li) or characters that actually had fun combos are were kinda wasted on a musou (Elizabeth) but whatever.

but ultimately an enjoyable enough gaming experience goes immediately into the trash because wonderful japanese game UI devs decided that it’s a good idea to put the “delete save file” button right next to the “exit game” button and I, in a misclick, lost 30~ something hours of gameplay so honestly fuck this game.

i also bought the heroine x dlc outfit for Saber, because I’m a complete fucking idiot tool, only to find out that saber isnt actually a character in the main story, and her side story is shortest of all the side stories in the game and took me like 15 minutes to clear. I probably deserve this for buying costume dlc tho

GAME I WAS MOST DISSAPOINTED BY:

WOLFENSTEIN 2

well while I definitely think its probably one of the best video game stories of the year, maybe the best idk if I think it’s better than nier i’ll sleep on that, with some really great setpiece moments, the game itself honestly hit a point where it felt more frustrating than fun to play because of just awkward game design choices. The fact that basically all the enmies in the game where hitscan enemies, with even the projectile enemies having projectiles so fast they might as well be hitscan, combined with the game’s “reinforcement system” (not a real system name just one im calling it cuz i guess that makes sense.) lead to a lot of scenarios where I just get killed by a hitscan enemy who literally spawned behind me. Combine this with a lot of weird things like the game’s HORRIBLE damage feedback and the fact that you cant even see 80% of the item pick ups makes the game just really annoying, and it’s honestly  disappointing coming off wolfenstein TNO and Doom 2016 which didnt have any of these issues, and i hate that the game with the best story of bethseda’s “classic fps re imagining” projects is also the worst gameplay wise.

yeah and modern politics in my VIDEO GAME bro haha!!! dont want no modern times in my games!!

GAME THAT REMINDS ME THAT I’M A COMPLETELY INEPT IDIOT WITH SQUARES FOR HANDS THE BEST

TEKKEN 7

I still cant do gigas’s BNB which is literally just D2 / F2 1 / F2 F1 / dash / DF 1+2 because I swear to god I got brain damage or something.

GAME THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE THE BIGGEST PIECE OF SHIT

NIER AUTOMATA

i’m sorry pascal

MOST BUSTED SHIT IVE SEEN IN A VIDEO GAME  THIS YEAR BECAUSE I LOVE POWER GAMING.

ZENOBIA (XENOBLADE CHRONICLES 2)

 WHAT THE FUCK? INCREASED DAMAGE AGAINST UNIQUE ENEMIES, BONUS DAMAGE FOR EVERY ENEMY IN THE FIGHT, BONUS DAMAGE ON ENEMIES HIGHER LEVEL THAN YOU? NOT ONLY THAT HER LEVEL 3 BLADE ART ALSO DOES EITHER BONUS DAMAGE AGAINST HIGHER LEVEL ENMIES OR UNIQUES. CANT REMEMBER WHICH BUT IT DOESN’T MATTER. I USED HER LEVEL 3 ART IN A CHAIN ATTACK ON THE FINAL BOSS AND IT STRAIGHT UP DID LIKE A THIRD OF THE BOSSES HEALTH. WHAT THE FUCK.

BEST FLYING IN A VIDEO GAME.

TRANSFORMERS: WAR FOR CYBERTRON

Okay this game came out in 2010 or something but i played it this year and if you want a game with good flying mechanics play this game. I cant really explain it that well because i’m not very smart but this game just feels so good on the flying transformers chapters. I love being able to switch from the complete helicopter-ish level of control (which even on its own is better than any helicopter segment in any game ever) to jet fighter NO CONTROL BUT HIGH SPEED on the on the fly (haha). Combine this with being able  to switch between flying to third person shooter mode on command as well and it’s so awesome. I’d love to play a whole game of just the flying transformers level.

It felt pretty good in Fall of Cybertron too but you only get to be a flying transformer for half of a level in the single player. never got th play online.

there really isn’t a joke here or  anything I just want to gush about how some  transformers game managed to perfectly nail flying in as a gameplay mechanic.

CUTEST GIRL OF THE YEAR:

MORAG (XENOBLADE CHRONICLES 2)

I LOE  YOU MORAG

WORST GAME OF THE YEAR:

STILL AND YET IT MOVES

I’m not even giving this game the respect of a picture of its cover art. fuck this game. i got it from a humble bundle that i literary traded tf2 weapons or something with a friend for and i still feel like i payed too much.

GO PLAY PAPER MARIO 2

[cosmosogler]

hi.

last night my brother screamed at his computer until around 1:30 even though i went to bed at 12:45. i finally dozed off around 2.

when my alarm went off at 9 i was so tired from not sleeping and from comicon that i slept in for 45 minutes. my brother was already up and screaming at his computer by 9.

i took a shower... needed to get the glitter from yesterday off. i scrubbed a little bit before bed last night but dumping water on myself for 20 minutes helped more. mom made french toast. i got real sick after trying it.

i mostly bummed around watching youtube videos until 12:30 when i needed to start getting ready for therapy. i got to the facility on time and filled out the daily check in stuff and blah blah blah. i really didn’t want to go, but i wanted to interact with mom and dad less than that. dad already had some judgmental things to say as i was leaving. something about honoring our veterans.

i tried to avoid over-participating in therapy today but got kind of dog piled during my check in. i kept it focused on what i did and not how i felt. i think that kept everyone pretty distracted. the therapist commented that i had done up my nails and looked really good and it was good to see me taking care of myself. i said i only did it for the costume but she didn’t respond or look like she had heard me.

also i feel even worse than usual so i thought maybe it wouldn’t be a good idea to bring that up just to rain on their parade.

that sounds really, really stupid when i write it and look at what i just wrote.

but i didn’t want to be dour just for the sake of riling them up! i did that dumb thing where i would recount something bad that happened and laugh and then apparently immediately stop smiling. the therapist says i do that a lot. she said nobody else is laughing with me and i was thinking “just let me have this.”

sooo... we talked about boundaries today and co-dependence, which are important to talk about. more direct communication. how some people have rigid boundaries and some have porous, and in different situations, and how that can get out of control. i said i felt like i had porous boundaries and then the therapist was all “i see you as more of a rigid-boundaries person” and rated it 70/30. she asked if i had ever been open and honest with anyone which created a great launch pad for a list of people who snubbed me. 

i need to be more direct about what i need from therapy. but i really, REALLY don’t want to spend 3 hours complaining about people i don’t like. which seems to be necessary to explain why i don’t like people. 

i guess nobody knew that mom used to beat me when i was little because everyone got kind of quiet when i mentioned it when we were talking about physical boundaries. i forgot to mention that i had already called child services when i brought up she maybe hits my brother too... maybe wednesday. 

um... i refused to participate when we talked about sexual boundaries.

and i talked about how i don’t really feel anything when i do big favors for people. like when i drove leah to the hospital and stayed there with her all night. she never even thanked me. and... i mean, it’s hard to thank someone in that situation.

well, no it’s not... i didn’t have trouble thanking bradley or hogan when they drove me to and from the hospital back in january.

mm.

and thinking about everything i did for craig for literally nothing makes me too furious to think about anything else so i will try to avoid that road for now. maybe later.

now i’m getting angry about other stuff. i poured my heart and soul into my relationship with jim. i did everything i could to communicate clearly and be open and trust as best i could (maybe not incredible amounts of trust, but, enough to expect him to tell me when things weren’t working out any more). and he DITCHED ME WITHOUT SAYING ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i spent 12 years of my life being friends with that guy. do you know how much growing it took for me to start being able to have actual, like, friendship activities with him? how hard i worked to learn how to be a good friend and treat people better?

i’m not saying he owes me anything. but, like, a “this isn’t working, i’d like to stop talking for a while” would have been nice.

but no.

the therapist says i spend a lot of my time living in the past, and yeah... i have trouble letting go of my anger and frustration. i feel like if i don’t hold on to it and etch it into myself it won’t have been real. if i stop being angry everyone just gets relieved and smooths it over and goes back to their lives. “forgive and forget,” the christian school kids used to sneer at me after, like, spitting on me. that happened.

i can’t forgive or forget because that would be letting the bullies win. and i’m stubborn and hate when bad people get away with everything. that’s probably why i can’t let go of the craig stuff either. because i was a bad person, so i got what i deserved. and i have to remind myself of that every day, because that’s justice.

that and isn’t an aspect of ptsd, like, being stuck reliving the same events over and over even if you don’t want to any more? i mean, i get flashbacks. i don’t know if they’re real memories or not any more... but sometimes they come on and i literally cannot focus on anything that is happening in the present because i can feel what happened. the thoughts just kind of waltz in, ruin my day, and then leave, and then my day is ruined and i’m frustrated because it wasn’t real that time and i’m letting it ruin my day.

and, i feel like, if i don’t let it ruin my life, then that makes what happened ok, because it’s fine now!!! it doesn’t matter what happened, because it’s not happening any more!!! like the crime never happened, because the evidence is eroded out. but it did happen. and until someone who was there fricking acknowledges that it happened it needs to stay right where it is and FESTER until it smells so bad they have to recognize it.

does that make me feel better? no. but justice. i can’t sit back and say “well, karma will get him someday,” because that’s super vague and probably won’t actually happen because good things always happen to bad people. even hitler wasn’t brought to justice. he just killed himself. and his family. he never had to sit and look at what he did.

it feels wrong to move on unless something changes, or the event becomes real.

things i see/hear/whatever aren’t real. i can’t ever be sure if i’m experiencing reality or not. someone else has to tell me they’re seeing the same thing for me to be sure it really happened.

it’s not even that i have hallucinations or anything. it’s just... my sense of reality is so skewed from people being nasty to me that i cannot tell if my memories are real or not. and i know some of them aren’t, because that’s just how brains are wired. some of my earliest childhood memories, even the really sharp ones like the kicking and the beating and the screaming, have details that i’m sure just aren’t true. like what color the walls were. what time of year it was. what the floor was made out of. how big mom actually was compared to me. 

just like i can’t remember for sure if there were actually other people in the room or not with the craig stuff.

but if there weren’t other people there, then like half of my anger is totally fake. and that’s awful to think about.

and like... i could always just reaffirm to myself that everything i think is true. but not everything i think is true, that’s the nature of being alive and learning things and changing your understanding, and i can’t deliberately lie to myself. things aren’t ok.

and i feel like people who haven’t experienced that can’t understand how it feels. when someone else spends years ungluing your reality, you can’t really just stick it back on the wall. you can’t put your sense of reality back together without seeing the glue holding it there. and it’s so artificial that it’s just not the same as having real confidence. cracked mirrors still work, of course, but their functionality is irreparably changed. you become aware that you are looking in a mirror, and a damaged one at that. if you look in a regular mirror you just see your reflection. but with the cracked mirror, you see the glass that your reflection is coming from.

i don’t know how to reasonably convey this to my therapist during the span of a single check in... i don’t know how to say what i want to say, or what direction i would like to go in now, so i don’t bring up anything, and then i don’t get help, so i can’t figure out how to say what i want to say. cool.

should i just... print this out and hand it to her? that is alarmingly direct, and also risky, as i have to use dad’s computer to print everything. so the file will be on his computer unless i delete it and then suspiciously clear his printer history and also his recycle bin.

i mean, he’ll probably think it’s porn, but i don’t want him thinking that either!!!

and it could potentially take away from other group members’ time, because this is freakishly long already and i haven’t even gotten to my evening activities. i could give it to her during a break i guess.

after therapy i resolved to, well, resolve some of the communication issues i’m having with my family with the chores and the screaming. so i got a chore chart! and several different-colored markers for my family members to choose from. when i got home i explained it to mom. i think she is already not using it how i had hoped.

i also bought myself a chocolate mint mocha and too late i realized i had not specified that i wanted decaf. so i had the jitters for several hours after that. i tried to keep the explosion confined to asher’s chat window. i appreciate that he also sat through the mood crash afterward.

i saw the steven universe event. i have a soft spot for really mean, really insecure characters sometimes... i really want to talk to someone about it but i am Afraid of The Discourse. i have a lot of thoughts about pearl too but i don’t post them here because i don’t want... well, random people looking at my journal. even though it is public. i’m just not in a very good position right now to participate in huge discussions.

my favorites are of course the ones with the overblown egos. they are SO CONFIDENT. i wish i could believe in myself that much.

i gotta get up around 7:30 tomorrow to go get my hida scan. according to the google i can bring my ipod, thank god.

oh, that reminds me. i spent most of the morning talking to gilbert. we just chatted about whatever came up. harry potter, archie comments, the terrifying archie cartoon i saw when i was a wee babby. it scarred me for life. i was so scared of jughead, i swear to god.

(the humor/script was the real thing to be scared of. i watched an episode today. there ain’t nothing wrong with jughead.)

so i gotta try to sleep now. i’m gonna yell at my brother to shut the hell up when he plays league of legends so i can get some shuteye for once. i, of course, will then not be able to fall asleep anyway, because that’s just how it works.

i guess i should find a way to print that stuff i wrote out. there’s no way i’ll be able to say it in group. and i think i have gotten to some stuff that we might be able to work on instead of “angery” and “i hate everyone,” which are not things i can easily work with. 

oh, the therapist’s recommendation for what i should do to get close to people again was “make a new friend.” i started grinding my teeth.

i neglected to download all the cool music i found over the last few weeks... i will have to find something else to listen to during my hours on the scanning table. maybe i can mash a few soundtracks together on the way over to the imaging department. i need to tell dad i don’t actually know how to get to the hospital.

anyway, later. i hope you guys are having a better time than i am. that’s not setting the bar very high though.

oh, one more thing. i neglected to do any therapy homework over the weekend. my reasoning was, “if i am incapable of working hard in a way that will be helpful to me, then why waste my time.” i mean, i don’t have anything else to do, but it is less frustrating to talk about music theory with an acquaintance than it is to “phone in” yet another therapy work sheet. i worded it better when i was talking to asher... it’s too late to go into that now. i need to try to rest. i got individual therapy tomorrow and i need to make the most use of that ~45 minutes that i can.

[themurphyzone]

Spend the Day with Someone You Love Ch 5

Happy Platypus Day!

Ch 5- Lights, Camera, Traction! Part 1

“Silly face!” Sara and Milo posed, making ridiculous expressions as they took selfies in front of a life size statue of Time Ape. Melissa ate her chocolate sundae, blissfully unaware of her surroundings. Zack whistled, pretending he didn’t know the Murphy siblings when other people gave them strange looks. Three bags containing pillows, blankets, and snacks lay at his feet. 

“This is so going on my blog!” Sara exclaimed. “Come on, everyone! To Edgy Subject!” She led the others to the ground floor, stopping to check Milo’s shoelaces before he stepped on the escalator.  

“What’s Edgy Subject?” Zack asked.

“The store for all our Dr. Zone needs! Oh, and other shows too,” Milo said, grinning wildly. “We make it a point to go to Edgy Subject every time we go to the mall. I’d estimate about 84% of Sara’s allowance is spent there.”

“And once you see something you like but can’t buy, it will be ingrained into your memory. Forever. Forever!” Sara laughed maniacally, holding a flashlight under her chin. She frowned. “I can never pull this off without sufficient darkness.” She stuck the flashlight in Milo’s backpack.

Zack looked at Melissa for help. “There’s no escape, Zack,” she smirked. “You’ll preserve your sanity much better if you go along with it.”

Sara held the door to Edgy Subject open, shooing Milo and Melissa inside. “Zack, since you’re still a newbie, let me give you some advice,” she said, throwing out an arm to bar his path. “First, you must show self-restraint.”

“Whoo! Vinyl figurines, here I come!” a teenager with pink hair screamed. Sara pulled Zack out of the way as she barreled past them. 

“Watch out for that puddle!” Melissa yelled. The teenager paid her no heed, slipping on a small puddle and crashing head first into a nearby display stand. 

“Otherwise that happens. Is she okay?” Sara called to Milo.

“She’s not concussed!” Milo yelled. 

“She’ll be fine,” Sara murmured in relief. She turned back to Zack. “The second is that you should never venture to the back of the store.” 

“I’ll take your word on that one,” Zack wrote it down in his notebook. “Is there a third rule?” 

Sara nodded. “The third and final rule is to just find something nice! So what are we waiting for?” Sara walked over to a shelf displaying Dr. Zone merchandise, picking up a small box and examining it carefully. 

Milo was looking through a stack of Space Adventure T-shirts. “Hey, Zack! What’s your shirt size?” 

“Why?” Zack asked.

“Milo wants matching T-shirts in case we ever have a school event that might call for it in the future,” Melissa explained. 

“A medium,” Zack said. Milo handed him a shirt. Zack’s eyes widened, staring at the price tag in shock. “That’s expensive!” he gasped. 

“Quality isn’t cheap, but it’s totally worth it,” Milo said. “If you’re worried about the price, it’s fine! I was planning on paying for these myself. It was my idea anyway!” 

“No, that’s all right,” Zack protested. “You don’t have to! Really!” 

“Zack, we insist! We’re all friends here, and we are absolutely not letting you walk out of here empty-handed!” Melissa declared. 

“She’s right, Zack!” Milo agreed cheerfully, walking over to the register to purchase the shirts. As he pulled out his wallet, his elbow smacked into a rack of stuffed animals, the entire display crashing to the floor. “My bad,” Milo laughed nervously. “Sorry.” 

The cashier handed Milo his items. “Just a typical day here. No worries.” He moved away from the register in order to clean up the scattered stuffed animals. 

By the end of their spree at Edgy Subject, Sara had bought several boxes of keychains and was attempting to explain their appeal to Zack. “So far I’m missing two out of a set of twenty. I still need Time Ape in his transchronological form and Dr. Zone’s infamous toga outfit.” 

Zack raised an eyebrow. “So what if you get a repeat? You’re throwing five dollars away just to satisfy your collective need to have the entire set?”

“If you get a repeat, give it to a friend!” Sara grinned. “I forgot how many I gave to Milo and Melissa.” 

“Eleven for Milo, three for me,” Melissa said, sliding several wristbands of anime characters onto her arms. 

Zack had simply purchased two buttons with cheesy slogans on them, pinned to his backpack strap proudly. “I still don’t see the appeal.” 

Sara tore one of the boxes open. “You’ll understand soon enough-hey! Guys, I finally have the toga now!” She proudly showed off a small, detailed keychain of Dr. Zone in a white toga, one arm outstretched while the other held a scroll, as if he was dictating a speech to an audience. She passed it around, keeping an eye on Milo as he studied the figure. 

“I take some of what I said back,” Zack scratched his head awkwardly. “This looks really cool actually.”

“I’m gonna get lucky a second time, just watch!” Sara pulled a Trashcandroid out of another box, frowning. “Maybe this one? No. Now? Ugh, I always get the Time Bee-icle.” A pile of plastic and cardboard was increasing on the bench next to her. After a fruitless effort, she was finally left with one box. “One more. Please be the one I need. Please, with a double scoop of rocky road and cherries, be it!”  Sara reached inside, pulling out yet another Trashcandroid. She groaned. “Take the hurt away guys. Take it away.” 

Melissa grabbed one of the Trashcandroids, pushing the other repeats to Zack. “You’ll get it next time, Sara!” Milo patted her on the back. 

“Hey, check this out! There’s a contest that’ll be held at 2 in the center of the mall!” Melissa showed them a pamphlet plucked from a small kiosk. “And the grand prize is a truckload of pistachios!” 

“Cool! We should enter!” Milo said. “It’d be fun!” 

“We’d have to re-enact a love scene though. And Phantom of the Opera is banned. That’s a shame,” Melissa said, pointing to the fancy cursive letters that stated the objective of the contest. “Are there any good ones from Dr. Zone?” 

“You and Zack sign us up, Milo and I will start brainstorming,” Sara said, sitting down on a marshmallow cushion. Zack and Melissa headed to the sign-up, while Milo set police tape around the perimeter. “How about the scene from ‘The Zone’ series where Sierra kisses Dr. Zone in the lair of the evil Antonian matriarch?” 

“I didn’t really care for Sierra,” Milo admitted. “Not much personality.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Sara scratched her chin. “I don’t want to go with the one from the Dr. Zone series where Valerie kisses his corpse. I mean, ew.” She shuddered.

“I’ve got it!” Milo snapped his fingers in realization. “The love scene from the Pendulum of Space-Time arc in the Dr. Zone Files!”

“That’s it! Melissa and Zack have at least finished that arc! And there’s four parts to play, so it will be perfect!” Sara exclaimed. 

“Can I be Dr. Zone this time?” Milo asked. 

Sara nodded. “Good idea. You need to branch out more. I’ve been meaning to try role-playing Time Ape myself. We should probably look at that part again.” Sara scooted closer to Milo so he could see the video on her phone. 

“Boo!” a hand clapped Milo’s shoulder, making him suddenly jerk forward, yelping. Milo lost his balance, falling off the seat and hitting his chin against the carpet. 

“I’m okay!” he grunted. 

“Sorry, Milo!” Melissa knelt down to help him up. “I couldn’t resist.”

“It’s fine. So did you and Zack sign us up?” Milo rubbed his sore jaw. 

“Our number is 13,” Melissa showed him an entry slip with all their names printed on it. “Anyways, any ideas for our skit?”

“We do! So, you want to be the villain or the damsel in distress?” Milo asked.

“Villain,” Melissa said without hesitation. “I can’t damsel. And I only distress about grades.” 

“Cool!” Sara said. “Here are your lines, so we can at least run through it before we go on. Milo, get the props! Let’s break a leg! Triple exclamation point!”

Everyone stared, unsure what to make of her poor choice of words. Sara laughed nervously. “Not literally, of course. I’d really prefer no femurs getting crushed or snapped.” 

Zack gulped, clasping his hands together as he looked at the ceiling. “Don’t make me wear a skirt... Don’t make me wear a skirt....”

“Ladies and gentlemen! My name is Phineas! Welcome to to our 2nd annual Valentine’s Day contest! Like last year, contestants will be performing a love scene from any media of their choice, sans Phantom of the Opera. You can thank Buford for that one,” the host, a boy with a triangle-shaped head, announced. The audience cheered loudly. 

“Sure,” a husky boy grunted from the judge’s panel. “Everyone blame the bully.” 

“You have five minutes to impress the judges and wow the audience! And if you have last minute problems, Ferb is always happy to help,” Phineas pointed to his expressionless brother, who simply gave a thumbs-up.

Milo fussed with his Dr. Zone hat while Buford and the two other judges, a scrawny boy and a girl in a pink bow, bickered over who was at fault for that embarrassing incident. “It’s amazing they allowed a bunch of kids to host the contest,” Sara commented. A felt stopwatch hat rested in her lap. 

“This is entertaining in itself,” Melissa smirked. “Beats midday programming by a longshot.”

Zack buried his head in his arms. “Does anyone have a spare sweater? I’m freezing,” he complained. After learning that they were being judged in presentation, Sara had dug up an old, spare dress from her preteen years out of the trunk of her car. The dress fit him surprisingly well, although it had a color that reminded Milo of compost. He was starting to remember why Sara used to fight tooth and nail to avoid that particular article of clothing. 

“Without further ado, let the contest begin!” Phineas exclaimed. 

The first four entries all had elaborate costumes, though some of their acting suffered. The fourth group, consisting of two brothers and a mannequin in a dress, were extremely bad. The older brother kept shoving the younger one to the side so he could hog the spotlight. It was clear both of them were becoming increasingly aggravated each other, and the audience started to boo them. Finally, their disastrous skit ended when the mannequin’s head popped off during the climax and hit a switch to the side, causing a trapdoor to open on the stage‘s floor and send them plummeting to the mall’s basement. 

“Ferb, you might want to bubble wrap that switch,” Phineas remarked. “Thoughts, Isabella?”

“I do!” Isabella said in an odd, dreamy voice. Buford tapped her on the shoulder. “Huh, what?” She looked around, blushing madly. “Oh. It was bad. Two out of ten for acting. Three out of ten for presentation. Just plain bad.” The other judges agreed with her, though it took a little convincing from Isabella and Buford (the latter with his fist) so that the other boy didn’t whip up a complicated equation to explain what went wrong. 

“She’s way too nice,” Melissa mumbled. “I wouldn’t give a one to that performance.” 

Sara stood up. “I’ll be back in a minute. I need to chat with Ferb and see if the stage will be safe for us.” She awkwardly moved to the aisle, apologizing to various people as she blocked their view. 

Milo nodded, engrossing himself in the next skit, where a girl in a Ducky Momo outfit sang about loving a tree. The lyrics were silly, but she was an excellent singer and pulled it off incredibly well. Milo and Zack got up to give her a standing ovation, while Melissa whistled from her seat. The rest of the audience loved it too, and it took several minutes before the applause quieted enough so the judges could give their assessments on it. 

“Give it up for my sister, everyone! Next up, we have-” Phineas squinted at his cue card. “Blastweneededagroupname? Strange. Baljeet, didn’t you look these forms over?”

“I told you not to let Derek handle the sign-up station but did you listen to me? No, of course not!” Baljeet fired back. “He did this last year too!” 

Phineas stared. “All right then,” he coughed, a grin quickly returning to his face. “Please welcome Arthur, Frank, and Rebecca!” 

His hand swept towards the empty stage. Milo could have sworn he heard crickets.

“Awkward,” Sara singsonged as she came back. 

“So how’d it go?” Zack asked. 

“Pretty well,” Sara shrugged. “He agreed to rig up some safety precautions behind the scenes. Well, I think he did. He’s not much of a talker.”

“Arthur, Frank, and Rebecca?” Phineas repeated for the tenth time. “If you’re not on stage in two minutes, we’ll have to disqualify you!” 

I couldn’t resist putting in the PnF group. I miss them.