#but oh boy do I not give any fucks at *all* about spiderman lol

[coockie8]

jacksepticeye did not seriously put the title "the end already?" on a game that has been like 16 hours long at this point :/

[istherewifiinhell]

oh boy if theres any cover that could get my attention

[ID: Comic cover art by Mark Texeira, showing Spider-man swinging a web around Megatron, his arms bound to his chest. Spidey's in the black symbiote suit, other decepticons reacting to their tussle. END]

well anyway its not very good. marvel tf no 3, or 5-6 in uk, 1984, (despite the cover indicating january, it was in the fall)

alright lets go-- Writer: Jim Salicrup, Pencils: Frank Springer, Inks: Kim Demulder & Mike Esposito, Letters: Janice Chiang and Others*, Colour: Nelson Yomtov, Editor: Bob Buduansky, EiC: Jim Shooter Digital re-master by digikore studios limited. collection edits by Justin Eisinger and Alonzo Simon. editorial notes and assistance by Mark. W. Bellomo

* thats really how they credited it. not even the wiki list anyone else. what the fuck.

normally i strive for these posts to be ordered either in a way for comedy, or perhaps one that will give a gist of the plot. this one were just gonna try and get thru. okay?

robots... COMMENCE

[ID: Caption box: "--Or. While still inside him, witnessing Starscream's amazing transformation will!" Starscream lands from jet to bot mode, and says "Machines have been slaves on this backward world long enough!" He opens his cockpit, continuing "Today the roles are rightly reversed!" Sparkplug, who's hoisted up by the shirt goes "Ulp!" END]

always good to check in. okay. thanks starscream.

[ID: Sparkplug looks distressed, as Megatron looms behind. He's thinking "And these guys ain't any friendlier than my jailkeepers when i was a prisoner of war in Korea. Well, if that's the case…" and then says "My name's William Witwicky!Sergeant first class, United States Marines! Serial number--" Megatron picks him up by the foot, dangling him at head height. "Enough! You will cooperate or cease to exist!" END]

wha-. WILLIAM??? he was a POW in the KOREAN WAR. what the fuck. dont say that. dont say that ever again. anyway

[ID: Inside the Decepticon base, the cons standing around. Megatron speaks "Rumble…", who in response, twists his hand and replies "Whatever you say, boss!" Sparkplug standing on a small platform, thinks "These stooges'll do whatever the big cheese tells them!" Rumble holds his now unscrewed hand in the other, directing the energon spilling from his wrist into a oil drum. He says "Say "When" Scraplet!" Sparkplug replies "Er-- that's enough!" END]

i mean. yeah i think when ur saying. okay. ill do the science u kidnapped me for, but ill need some samples. ur not really expecting. that.

[ID: Autobots in alt mode, Optimus with his trailer open, says "Hound, Sideswipe, you're both low in fuel! Ride with me!" Sideswipe is driving up the trailer ramp and Hound responds "As you command, Optimus!" but thinks to himself "Wait 'til Doc Ratchet sees he has to patch up Sideswipe-- again!*" editors note: *see last issue-Bob. END]

hey look, play features. (i always love an editors note when theres less than 5 issues lol)

and introducing in this episodes special introduction

[ID: Full body of Ratchet, hands on hips. Notable, he looks more like a regular transformer, with a clear head and face, a blocky but still human layout of body. END]

the character models have been finished! good to see ya ratchet, hows having a body suiting ya? oh sorry were you looking for spiderman?

[ID: Caption box: "Soon, in a nearby secluded spot…" Peter Parker hides behind some rocks, looking toward a crowd on the other side. He thinks "I'll have a much better chance at photographing whatever's in that fortress as Spider- man!" and the symbiote suit starts to cover his body. "This costume's quite a time-saver! All I have to do is think about changing and it takes care of the rest!" He swings up to a tree thinking "If only I could solve all my problems as easily!" Editors note reads "This story takes place before spider-man #258." END]

im gonna level with you editors. i dont know what that means and i dont care.

[ID: Spidey is upside down, watching Gears transform, thinking "--I bet he's one of those robots returning to the nest!" Gears meanwhile thinks "How did i get stuck with this scouting mission? What do i care about these pesky little creatures?" He flies off, he continues musing "I've always suspected that Optimus Prime had a perverse sense of humor!" Spidey swings after him calling out "Hey! Hold on, big boy!--or as that funny lady on tv says, "Can we talk?" END]

spiderman can't u tell hes busy bitching about his job? all tho 10/10 first words to a transformers being hold on big boy.... me too man.

[ID: Caption box: Later, after extensive introductions and explanations… Spidey is hanging upside down over a congregation of Autobots in alt mode and remarks "I've fought alongside some weird characters in my career, Optimus--but this has to be a first!" Optimus replies "I am sure tales of your exploits would be interesting, Spider-man, but, for now, can you inform your military to step aside and allow us to deal with the Decepticons?" Spidey "Trust me--they'll never buy it coming from me! But i've got a plan!" END]

oh okay so were just. yeah okay were just gonna skip the interesting parts. no first meeting. okay. both of them: you seem cool but i havent read your comics. and also im not going to.

[ID: Caption Box: Meanwhile... Spidey and Gears scout out the Decepticon Base. Spidey, comically at length: We're in luck, Gears! With the army and your buddies keeping them busy out front, they're not guarding the back door! Of course, this sheer drop is enough to discourage most visitors--even traveling salesman-- but not your friendly out-of-town Spider-man! Gears thinks "This human reminds me of Bluestreak they both seem to love the sound of their own voice!" Spidey scales the cliff as Gears shoots up past him asking "Do all humans have powers like yours?" Spidey: Not since i checked last! I'd feel real foolish if they did! END]

does the bad text layout get a pass when its for a joke?

anyway give it up for the best three panels weve had all series

[ID: Spidey swinging around inside the base, Gears following, a door closing at the end of the hall. Spidey: They're trying to seal us in and i didn't even bring my overnight bag! He swings under the lowering bulkhead, calling out "See you later, big brother!" Gears simply bust thru the closed door saying "Not so fast! We're in this together, little one!" END]

wait what the fuck that was actually really cute. do that again, for a second there i thought i was reading good comics for a change

[ID: Spidey webbing up Megatron saying "Bazooka Joe's all tied up... Let's call a cab and split!" Gears is guiding Sparkplug away, who says "Remind me to thank that masked fella!" But Gears is thinking "This is worse than I expected! We don't have a chance against Megatron!" And calls out "Spider-man, hurry! We must--!" END]

Mf called him BAZOOKA JOE. alright. probably spiderman showing up after u were kidnapped by robits. not a big deal?

[ID: Caption box: Soon, after the other Autobots have disengaged from their battle with the Decepticons on the other side of the mountain… Autobots are standing over Gears, crumpled on the ground. One, Sunstreaker or Brawn, announces "That's the last piece-- we've collected all that's left of him!" Spidey is lowering down on a web asking "How can you all be so cold and unfeeling? He died a hero!" Sparkplug on the ground adds "Don't you even have mechanical hearts?" END]

lot of assuming "i know when robots are dead" from the humans here. hes fine. not that anyone even took the two seconds to say, "for us this is a recoverable injury he just needs the medic" lol. he waited until ratchet was actually. DOING that back at base. anyway. thats the crossover comic. its. not great. fine. maybe. OKAY BYE

[ID: Soundwave, heaving a massive piece of machinery over his head, and casually walking over a iron wrought fence that crunches under his feet. A guard shooting at him harmlessly and yelling "H-hey! Come back here with that!" And then thinks to himself "I'd quit this job if i wasn't so close to retirement! END]

(demastered edit. PURPLEWAVE YOU WILL LIVE ON IN OUR HEARTS AND MINDS)