#but now has to figure out what to do with him because he doesn't want the guy to tell anyone that HE'S really alive
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galactaknightyaoi · 1 month ago
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making a fankid but shaking my head the entire time so people know i'm against the societal belief that everyone's goal and only purpose in life should be to have kids and form a family
#i snapped and made a rock kandi fankid#she was meant to be a one off design to cheer me up and give me something to do#but i made her too cute. now im attached#her name is lacey :) princess lacey at that#idk what im going to do to be able to fit her in my thing. rock kandi or just a kirby kid in general was Never meant to be a thing#that guy's an adult in my oc timeline. and he does fuck all all day as he always has. it's a part of his bit that he's not anyone important#outside of being the hero of popstar of course. he's not a knight or a king/prince. he's not even an adventurer. he likes his planet#and wouldn't want to be too far from it so the idea of being an explorer doesn't appeal to him.#at the end of every adventure he always returns to popstar because popstar's his home#he likes just being a normal guy who just saves the world from time to time. he likes fishing and eating and sleeping#and making friends and juggling children. it's just what he does all day. he loves it.#he's always been happy with simplicity and living in the moment no matter how boring that moment is#and i fear that this would accidentally lent itself to a like. kind of a deadbeat dad?? or take away too much of his carefree bum-ness#technically this is ribbon's and fluff's spawn since kirby can't have kids. so maybe i'll just make the world's first kirbyless rock kandi#whatever you'd call that. Fluffbon?#they all live in different places so i always figured it'd be kind of impossible for it too work out in the long run??#or it wouldn't be That serious. not serious enough for a lacey#which is why i didn't make it canon to my AU and shit and only enjoy it at a distance slash in like a vacuum#so I don't knowww i don't knowww but i'll figure it out i guess#text post
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jichanxo · 2 months ago
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whoops i forgot about... sunday six (senseific edition)
tags: @four-white-trees @passthroughtime @overdevelopedglasses @skysquid22 @mike----wazowski
yagami and kitakata decide to go eat out together.
Kitakata agreed. “Yeah, can’t imagine I’d be in the mood to cook.”
Yagami made a point of rolling his eyes. “Don’t act better than you are. You don’t cook. I’ve seen your kitchen.”
Kitakata frowned, putting his hands on his hips. “You don’t know me just from that.”
Yagami ignored the obvious provocation. “What do you want to eat?”
“Depends. Are you buying?”
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avirael · 7 months ago
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The Frozen Lake
It was the third day since he had stopped feeling like dying.
About a week ago he had woken up from his far too lifelike fever dream and a few days later the last spikes of the fever itself had been gone too just like the hallucinations it had brought in his sleep.
He still had been sick though and welcomed Rael telling him to stay in bed until he was perfectly healthy again all too eagerly.
While he still sneezed every now and then, it was at least tolerable now, still annoying but he didn’t feel incredibly uncomfortable anymore.
That day, just like the last and also the ones before that, he had awoken late. Against Rael’s order to stay in bed he had found the courage to get up and take a look out of the window. It was a sunny day, which in Coerthas still meant that it was bitterly cold though. But the sun was shining brightly and already high in the sky too which meant it had to be almost midday. He had slept way too long again, way to many hours for a surprisingly dreamless sleep. Or maybe it was exactly the lack of dreams that allowed him to finally rest, after all in the past there rarely had been good ones…
For a moment he considered to go downstairs and ask for a late breakfast if that wasn’t too insolent given the late hour but then a knock sounded from the door.
Quickly he hurried back to bed, just in case it was Rael, but the person who carefully peeked into the room a few seconds later wasn’t a viera.
“Ah, you are awake! That’s good!”, Haurchefant exclaimed happily and brought a small tray with hot soup and also something warm to drink. “It is so late already, you must be horribly hungry. Alphinaud checked in on you earlier but you were still fast asleep and he didn’t have the heart to wake you.”
A little uncertain on how to answer to that, A’viloh just nodded. Haurchefant grinned, put down a mug on the bedside table and handed A‘viloh a comfortingly warm bowl filled with some rather delicious smelling stew.
Instead of fetching the chair from the small desk by the window, Haurchefant sat down at the lower end of the bed balancing the tray with his own lunch on his knees. Rael once told him that ishgardian society had an absurd amount of strict and antiquated rules and so A’viloh couldn’t help but wonder, that although it seemed like a very appropriate distance to him, in Haurchefant’s hometown the fact alone that he dared to sit on someone else’s bed was probably scandalous.
“I hope you don’t mind me having lunch with you.”, the Elezen asked as he noticed A‘viloh staring.
Quickly the Miqo’te lowered his gaze to his bowl of soup. “Not at all.”, he muttered and tried a spoonful of the food just to change the topic. “Mhh, this is very good!”, he mumbled, still chewing, surprised by how good this really was compared to the bland food and bitter teas Rael had usually brought him these last few days. It must have been the Viera’s way of punishing him for running away.
Haurchefant laughed and then for a while they ate in silence.
“You look a lot healthier already.”, the Elezen stated after a while with an amiable smile on his face before taking a sip from his mug.
A‘viloh shrugged a little embarrassed, since it had been his own fault that he hadn’t been well in the first place. “Only because all of you took so good care of me.”
Haurchefant nodded. “You know, you had us all horribly worried right?”
“Sorry about that.”, he said and guitily looked into his mug.
Curiously Haurchefant eyed him for a moment. “Why did you do that anyway? Run out into the storm.”
A bit surprised A’viloh looked up. Had they all thought he had done this on purpose? “There wasn’t a storm when I left! What do I know about weather? I didn’t expect it to start snowing, let alone that much!”
That made the Elezen chuckle again but he still looked at him expecting an answer.
“Still… why did you leave?”
“I assumed Rael told you…”, A’viloh replied not sure what Haurchefant wanted to hear exactly. He nodded. “Rael did. But maybe I want to hear it from you…”
A’viloh sighed. His plan hadn’t been very smart and he felt a little uncomfortable having to explain his reasons to someone else, when in retrospect it didn’t make much sense even to his own ears.
“You know the… circumstances under which we fled Ul’dah… I couldn’t… um… the fact that we didn’t even know what happened to our friends… I wanted to find out, because it doesn’t seem fair to me that we escaped while all of them didn’t…”
“Mhh…”, Haurchefant nodded thoughtfully but let go off the topic for now. Instead he asked, „And how are you feeling today?”
Somehow that question confused A’viloh even more.
“What do you mean?”
“It’s a simple question, isn’t it?”, he said still smiling politely.
Of course it was a simple question. Just the answer felt unreasonable complicated to him. To make things even more difficult people who asked such a question usually wanted to hear “I‘m fine, and you?” or “Very good, thank you.” for an answer and rarely the truth. They certainly didn’t want to hear “A few days ago I was convinced I was going to die and honestly it wasn’t that bad, so now I‘m still not sure wether I am happy to still be alive or not”.
“Alright… I guess.”, he mumbled instead. He had never been a good liar and could only hope that this fact wasn’t too obvious for the Elezen.
“You know what?”, Haurchefant proclaimed after watching him thoughtfully for a second. “Today is a wonderful day. We should go for a walk.”
“A walk?!”, A’viloh exclaimed wide-eyed, as if he had just asked something unreasonable of him.
“Why not?”
A’viloh couldn’t think of a good reason why not, other than that he was supposed to stay in bed, so he shrugged.
“Where’s Rael?”, he asked instead.
Haurchefant smirked. “Do you need Rael’s permission to go outside?”
“Of course not.”, the Miqo’te protested. “But Rael will be mad if I run off again, especially against their orders to stay in bed.”
“Rael and Alphinaud went to the observatory earlier.”, Haurchefant explained. “We’ll be back before they are, I promise.”
What was A’viloh supposed to say against that and also against the expectant look on the Elezen’s face. He took another glimpse towards the window and decided that it looked nice enough to go outside.
“Fine.”
“Good!”, Haurchefant exclaimed happily and collected their empty bowls and mugs. “There should be warm clothes for you in the wardrobe. If you need anything else just ask someone. I’ll wait for you by the northern gate.”
After Haurchefant had left, A’viloh remained sitting in his bed for a moment longer contemplating on the Elezen’s question. Yes, he felt better again. But better in what comparison? Better than a few days ago when he had felt and also been half-dead? Though he didn’t feel sick anymore now, there still was a weigh on his heart. From his plan that had failed so spectacularly and even more so from the dreams he wouldn’t have minded to keep on dreaming forever.
Vehemently he shook his head and decided not to think about that now or he would just crawl back under the blanket of his comfortably warm bed again. Instead he got up and took a look into the wardrobe. Almost none of these were his own clothes of course since all he possessed were the ones he had worn on his body that day they fled Ul’dah. Very unsuitable for this climate. But neither did he see the borrowed clothes he had worn that night when he had tried to run away. Everything in here looked even softer and warmer like someone had wanted to make sure he was feeling comfortable. To his surprise the things didn’t look that much too big for him either, unlike his last set of clothes. Besides a few Hyur most people here at Camp Dragonhead were grown up Elezen but these clothes looked like they belonged to neither. Maybe it were clothes for Elezen children, he wondered and also thought that in that case someone must have brought them here just for him.
Grateful for so much effort he picked a few pieces and got dressed. Lazily he ran his fingers through his hair to get rid of the worst knots but the look into the small mirror at the washbasin, where his tired face stared back at him reproachfully, just made him sigh. Once he was ready he took the warm coat out of the wardrobe too and went out to look for Haurchefant. Just as he had said, the Elezen was standing by the gate that led to the north-east, towards the ruins of the Steel Vigil.
From afar Haurchefant already recognised the Miqo’te, his bright red hair a singularity among all the people living here. Pleasantly smiling as always he waved at him and A’viloh couldn’t help but smile a little too and wave back as he hurriedly walked towards him.
“There you are! I see the clothes fit you nicely.”
A’viloh nodded.
“They do. Thank you very much for these.”
Haurchefant dismissively waved with one hand. “It’s the least I could do…”
But he had done a lot more than that, A’viloh thought. “I think there’s more I need to thank you for. Rael told me it was you who saved my life.”
“Mhhh…”, Haurchefant tilted his head as if he wasn’t sure if this statement was entirely the truth. “Rael is too humble. They played a bit of a role in that too. After all it was Rael who noticed you were gone. And it was also Rael who didn’t leave your bedside and tried their best to heal you.”
A’viloh remembered waking up and finding the usually quite touch-averse viera cuddled up to him with a look on their face so horribly sad like he had never seen on them before. Rael had pretended it was nothing but it had been a very unconvincing performance. Asked about it Alphinaud had only offered a few sentences about how worried Rael had looked and how they had used all kinds of spells he himself had never seen or heard of before, all of it to try and save him. It had made him feel even more guilty for his stupidity.
So maybe Haurchefant was right. But still it had been him who had risked going out into the storm to find him.
“Anyway. I still want to thank you! Honestly.”, he insisted. But how honestly was it really?
Sure, he was glad to still be alive. After all his plan hadn’t been to run out into a blizzard and freeze to death, although some of them seemed to think that was the case. But once he found himself in this situation he had to admit that he had welcomed his fate rather willingly. A fact that shocked even himself a little looking back at it now.
“You’re welcome. After all you wouldn’t be any help to your friends frozen to death out there.”, Haurchefant joked with a wry smile on his lips.
“I guess not...”, A’viloh muttered, the topic of his friends making his mood visibly sink again.
Of course the Elezen noticed and his smile turned into a playful grin. “But I acted a little selfish too, you know? I think Camp Dragonhead is a lot friendlier with your company and I would like to have you and your pretty smile around a little longer.”
For a moment A’viloh’s eyes shot up to look at the others face before he quickly pretended that something somewhere a little bit to his left was a lot more interesting. Sometimes Haurchefant randomly said things, A’viloh hadn’t had the slightest idea how to react to. Not because he was that oblivious but simply because it puzzled him. Nonetheless the air suddenly didn’t feel that cold anymore on his face.
Haurchefant was always very kind to him. Well, he mostly was kind to everybody but sometimes he seemed to admire him especially. Him of all people, although there was nothing special about him. Haurchefant sometimes spoke of him like he was one of the greatest heroes of all time and it felt so ridiculous to him. He was just silly, cowardly A‘viloh! What had he ever achieved in his miserable life to justify such admiration? The people called him a Warrior of Light but wasn’t that some grand overstatement? Some days he thought all of this had been a horrible mistake. A great misunderstanding! Then he wondered how he had ever gotten entangled in this madness in the first place and also if he ever would get out of it again. But what else should he do with his life anyway...
While A’viloh’s brain still screeched in desperate search for a proper response, Haurchefant seemed to realise he had flustered him and glossed it over by gesturing to the gate.
“How about we walk a few yalms? There’s something you need to see!”
Still too dumbstruck to speak or to even wonder what the Elezen was talking about, A’viloh nodded and then proceeded to follow him out into the snowy landscape.
After a few minutes Haurchefant paused and took a deep breath. “Isn’t the air wonderful today?”
A’viloh followed his example, breathed deeply and let his gaze wander over the snow covered landscape with a few pines here and there and the mountains and ruins of the Steel Vigil in the distance. The air was cool and fresh, still cold enough that the warm sun couldn’t melt the snow. Instead the rays of sunshine made the scenery shine and sparkle as if everything was covered not in ice but in millions over millions of tiny diamonds.
“It is.”, he answered and smiled, surprised how beautiful this inhospitable landscape could be, before with a sudden spark of curiosity he finally asked. “Where are we going?”
“It’s not far anymore.”, Haurchefant said with a grin on his face and pointed into another direction. Shortly after and only a bit further ahead they reached a small lake.
As they got closer A‘viloh noticed that it not only was covered in a layer of snow and ice but also that quite a few off-duty soldiers, given the proximity to the camp he assumed they had to be, were standing right on top of the frozen lake. No, they were not quite standing. It looked more like they were dancing or flying maybe. More or less gracefully they moved over the lake‘s surface in fluid swift strides, some just moving in wide circles and other swirling around this way or that. A’viloh had never seen something like this and it looked strange and impossible but at the same time very beautiful to him.
The two of them had almost reached the lake by then, A’viloh a few steps ahead to get a better look at the wondrous people on the ice and he already wanted to ask how they did that, when his attention was drawn elsewhere by a curious squawking sound.
“Oh! Look at them!”, the Miqo’te exclaimed, his fascinated smile still turning a little brighter, as he gestured to a small flock of wild geese resting at the shore of the lake. With ruffled feathers they sat closely huddled together at the edge of the ice and suddenly A‘viloh couldn’t help but worry about them. They looked so unbothered by his presence, sleeping through the day and all the hubbub around them, looking all exhausted and frozen with their puffed up feathers. Like anything could happen to them and they wouldn’t even mind.
Strangely he wondered what he himself had looked like when Haurchefant had found him unconscious in the snow. He must have been a pitiful sight. Had the Elezen thought him beyond saving too, just like he himself had. What if he had found him a little later or not at all? Maybe that would have been better, a voice murmured to him just like it had so many times before and for a moment, tempted by the grief heavy on his heart once again, he almost believed it.
But no, he would be dead then and while he would have liked to imagine that this would mean he could be with his loved ones again, it was not exactly what either of the tribes he had lived with believed.
Vaguely he remembered his father working for hours, digging a grave at what used to be Wellwick Wood. An elderly woman too exhausted by their long journey, his grandmother if he remembered correctly, had died shortly after they had arrived there. With a sad smile on his face his father had explained to his children, who had stared down into the hole in the ground with confusion in their eyes, how by returning her body to the earth there could still grow new life from this death.
Or the drake tribe of the Sagolii Desert, who always burned their dead and left the ashes to be carried away by the desert wind, believing that it would make it easier for the deceased‘s aether to return to the Aetheric Sea and create something new elsewhere.
With a sudden sharp pain in his heart A’viloh realised that neither of the people he loved had gotten the burial they would have wanted for themselves. And neither had A‘viloh himself wanted to die in the coldness of Coerthas and be forever forgotten under a thick layer of snow and ice. He had thought about dying before but never had he been this close to it. For a second he wondered if this was something worth speaking to Rael about, but he wasn’t sure they wouldn’t misunderstand and get mad at him again.
“Why do you make such a sad face now?”, Haurchefant asked having noticed the smile slip from the Miqo’te’s face. But A’viloh just vehemently shook his head and focused on the geese again.
“They must be horribly cold.”, he wondered in a voice that suggested he already planned to take all of them to the safety of his comfortably warm room.
Haurchefant chuckled. “Don’t worry, they survived the storm out here after all. They keep each other warm, that’s why you‘ll rarely see one of them alone. A bit like you and your friends.”
“Maybe…”, A’viloh answered thinking about this comparison for a moment. “I just wish it wouldn’t always be me who needs to be taken care of. But as proven in Ul’dah and now once again I am simply too weak and useless to keep myself alive, not to mention anyone else.”
The Elezen’s face got a little stern as he folded his arms in front of his chest. “Don’t say that, I am sure it’s not true! This was just bad luck! You are neither weak nor useless!”
A’viloh shrugged. “But that’s how I feel right now...”
Slowly Haurchefant nodded before speaking again with a silent but determined voice. “Listen. I‘ll never forget how bravely you fought for Francel although you barely knew him. You could have gotten yourself in trouble with that and you helped him anyway.”
“It’s not like I did that on my own -”, A’viloh tried to protest but was immediately interrupted. “But you still helped! And I’m sure even without Rael you would have done so!”
Another shrug was all Haurchefant got in response, so the Elezen thought for a second before making an offer. “You want to make yourself useful, right? Get stronger? I could teach you how to fight like a real ishgardian knight, with sword and shield. Or we have some dragoons at Camp Dragonhead too! I’m sure there’s a lot you could learn from them.”
A‘viloh‘s face turned to disbelief. “I really don’t think I could fight with armor and weapons this heavy…”
“You can’t say so if you don’t try! And I have you know that dragoon armors are surprisingly light. How do you think they could still be this agile otherwise? Promise me to at least try training with them a little!”
He didn’t really want to agree to that. He knew he would make a fool of himself. But how could he say no with Haurchefant trying everything in his power to cheer him up. Weakly he shook his head and muttered: “Fine…”
“Perfect!”, Haurchefant exclaimed with a bright smile on his face. “I think an early reward for your efforts is appropriate then!”
Confused A’viloh watched him take a small bag off of his shoulders, which he hadn’t even noticed until now. For a moment the Elezen was busy undoing a knot before he opened the bag and presented to A‘viloh a set of two weirdly shaped blades attached to pieces of wood with leather straps. He had no idea what these constructs were meant to do and that was plainly visible on his face. “What’s that?”
“Ice skates of course!”, Haurchefant said as if that would explain it all but the Miqo’te‘s face remained clueless, so Haurchefant gestured to the lake behind them. “You attach them to your boots so you can walk on the ice like this!”
“Oh!”, A’viloh exclaimed as he understood what Haurchefant was planning. “I don’t think-… I mean I‘ve never-… You don’t really want me to step on that lake do you?” The idea somehow scared him.
“Why not?”, Haurchefant asked for the second time today with this smile that made the question sound like a challenge.
“It’s just a bit of ice!”, A‘vi objected. “What if it breaks?”
The Elezen shook his head and proceeded to fasten the metal blades beneath his boots. “Ah, don’t worry. The ice is thick enough, it will take at least a few more days to melt.”
“I don’t know…”, was all A’viloh replied as Haurchefant pressed another pair of skates into his hands. But the Elezen remained determined and took a few wobbly steps through the snow and onto the ice. “See! I can stand on it and it doesn’t break! You are a lot lighter than me, so why wouldn’t you be able to?”
Oh, you don’t know my bad luck!, A‘viloh thought but Haurchefant didn’t look like he would take that for an excuse. Instead he stretched out a hand towards the Miqo’te. “Come one! Believe me, this is going to be funny!”
For a second A‘viloh pondered his options. The idea of nothing but a little bit of ice between him and the water still terrified him but Haurchefant seemed so excited about this and the other people actually seemed to have fun too. Maybe he should at least pretend to try... Reluctantly he sat down on a rock and tried to put on the skates just like Haurchefant had done a moment ago.
“The clasp on the back too. Make sure none of them are loose… Yes, that looks fine!”, Haurchefant helpfully explained. As A’viloh got up, he almost flopped right back down into the snow. It was a weird feeling to balance his whole weight on only two thin pieces of metal. As he carefully took the first few steps towards the lake Haurchefant reached out for him once more. “Here! Take my hand! I don’t want you to fall…”
Hesitantly A‘vi stepped onto the ice and immediately felt like the ground was being pulled away beneath his feet. He struggled for balance, feeling himself falling backwards, so Haurchefants arm was a very welcome thing to hold on to.
With a chuckle the Elezen tried to loosen A‘vi‘s desperate grip on his arm and instead took each of his hand in one of his own before carefully making slow steps backwards pulling A‘viloh over the ice, which A’vi could swear was making suspicious crackling sounds below them. There was no way to tell the blades beneath his feet not to move, so all A’viloh could do was try not to fall and plead to Haurchefant with ears flat on his head and panic in his eyes, as he slowly was pulled further onto the lake. “No, no, no. Take me back, that’s a horrible idea!”
“Calm down. There’s nothing to be afraid of. I promise.”, Haurchefant said soothingly and continued to explain to him how to move on the ice skates. And in fact the Elezen’s calm voice slowly made A’viloh feel less anxious. His hands, frantically clasping at Haurchefant’s, relaxed along with his legs. It was still a weird feeling to be standing on the ice but now it felt a lot easier to remain balanced. He glanced at the people around them while remaining as still as possible, studied their movements for a moment and then tentatively tried to mimic the way they slowly pushed their feet above the slippery surface. To his surprise he really moved forward without much effort and also without feeling the sensation of falling again, closer to Haurchefant who had steadied him with his outstretched arms so far.
“See! It’s not that difficult.”, he said while making another step backwards so A’viloh had to follow with another step forward. The Miqo’te, strangely excited about the fact that he was actually moving on these weird ice-blades, laughed happily. “You are even going backwards!”
Haurchefants laughed. “One step after the other. Let’s teach you how to go forward first, hm? I‘ll let go off one of your hands but don’t worry, I still got you. One feet after the other just like you did before…”
In fact it almost felt easier now that he could use one of his arms to balance himself. Very slowly at first they floated above the icy surface of the lake but soon A‘viloh got braver. Once he almost lost his balance but for a comparably tall and strong person like Haurchefant it seemed like a very easy task to keep a small Miqo’te on his feet. Almost falling had felt like a shock for a second but only moments later they were laughing about it and in the end A’viloh was surprised and also a little proud how quickly he had learned and how much fun this was.
He wasn’t sure how much time they spent there on the frozen lake but at some point a bell sounded from the nearby Camp. Startled A’viloh looked up (and almost lost his balance again). “How late is it? I’m sure you have more important things to do than this! I’m sorry if I’m keeping you from doing your work.”
But Haurchefant just laughed and teased, “What could be more important than prove to you that not all of Coerthas is a deadly wasteland trying to kill you? But I think we really should return soon. I don’t want you to get cold again and after all we also don’t want Rael to find out about this little excursion, do we?”
For a second A’viloh wished the viera could see him now and wondered what their reaction would be like. The thought made him chuckle.
And as they floated, one last circle around the lake, A’viloh couldn’t help but wonder that maybe it was happy moments like this. The reason he was still here. Moments that made his life worth living.
---
inspired by the poem The Reversal by Leila Chatti
#ffxiv#ff14#final fantasy xiv#final fantasy 14#ffxiv writing#ffxiv screenshots#gpose#Aviloh Tia#Haurchefant Greystone#This ended up sadder than I wanted actually XD#But at least it ends on a good note and thats worth something huh?#I read that poem while I was still writing the last story and thought it fitted A'vi's mood quite well#and that it would be sweet to make him go ice skating although he has no clue what that is and how to do it :D#Did I ever tell you A'vi is his own worst enemy sometimes? I probably did or you figured that out by yourself by now...#If he thinks he can't do something he won't even try#I like to blame that on the expectactions people had for him and which he failed repeatedly but it's probably a bit of a character flaw too#However before late HW it is probably also very easy to talk him into pretty much anything if you have the slightest bit of persuasion skil#oops thats probably a character flaw too... but in this case it is useful at last :D#A'vi will get better soon I promise!#Well obviously he will get worse first for obvious reasons but then he'll get better eventually!#Maybe... I hope... Oh boy I am seriously trying but this sad cat doesn't want to be happy D:#I think getting the Scions back will help a little and so will the happenings of Stormblood I think...#And regarding Haurchefant: I don't think I see this as particularly romantic (I mean from Haurchefant's side maybe given his character)#I should probably make a post one of these days giving some iside look on A'vi's emotions! because it's complicated! XD#he's been alive but not really living for so long now and maybe this near-death-expierence was necessary to make him think about that...#rant over! I'll make a different post another day! this already got out of hand again...#and once again I’m posting this on a Friday! i might just start calling it FanficFriday! which doesn’t mean you get something each week XD
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nobodieshero-main · 7 months ago
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NOBODY MOVE I'M HAVING POSITIVE THOUGHTS ABOUT MORDRED AND ATLAS.
#they finally talk. mordred tells his big brother that 'once upon a time i was supposed to stop breathing before i hit my teens.'#he tells him everything about knowing when his death day passed about the nightmares and the confusion and the agoraphobia#he tells him about his insecurities and his self-hatred -- how terribly must he have fucked up to not even be worthy of dying?#he tells him he's scared and he doesn't know what he's supposed to do with all this....life.#and atlas is THERE and he hugs him and he's so fucking relieved that - whatever his brother was meant for - he survived.#he hugs his little brother and tells him its okay to be scared because no one really knows what theyre doing with their lives#he holds his face between his hands and god when did mordred get so big?#''all you have to do is KEEP living okay? that's what you do with life: you live it.''#its not exactly poetry but it IS what mordred needs to hear#ive been thinking A Lot about mordred making an appearance in the searching but idk for sure yet#i just need to figure out WHEN this conversation happens so i can wrap up mordreds arc the way he deserves#i think im gonna try patching his and atlas's relationship across the second and third book#like atlas is HOME and then he's not and mordred is bitter but then- a letter. atlas has written to him.#and he keeps writing. bc he knows now what it is to lose someone and he doesnt want to lose his brother#so they're pen pals!! and it's stiff and formal and awkward and slow going but eventually they're exchanging gossip and venting and.#aaaa#happy lavore content wow look at me go#lavore brothers#mordred lavore#atlas lavore
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blujayonthewing · 4 months ago
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so in juniper's campaign we've just found ourselves in a high-stakes situation that I as a player do frankly find stressful and am anxious about, but hey hi also the DM was like 'okay here are the exact mechanics of how this is going to work because I don't want to surprise you with serious repercussions, also here are all the options you will have to try to do something about the situation-- [affected player] what do you think? honest feedback, I don't want it to feel unfair, I want to be clear that I am not just trying to kill your character, and if it ends up being badly balanced we can revisit it down the road' and oh my god I could COLLAPSE and WEEP with gratitude
#[tears in my fucking eyes] WHAT IF DND WAS GOOD!! WHAT IF A DM THAT'S GOOD!!!#LIKE I've said actually MOST of my DMs are good but because of the way this situation was presented specifically#where-- as NOT the affected player-- it does feel like the way it came up was a little unfair and I AM worried about the stakes--#I REALLY SPENT SO MUCH OF THAT ABOVE-TABLE TALK GOING OH WOW I FEEL LIKE OUR FRIEND ACTUALLY LOVES US AND WANTS THIS TO BE FUN!!#I DON'T KNOW THAT I AGREE WITH WHAT HE'S DOING HERE BUT I TRUST MY FRIEND AND IT'S SAFE FOR US TO TALK ABOUT THINGS LIKE THIS PLAYER TO DM!!#WOWIE THAT FEELS RELEVANT TO MY DND EXPERIENCE RIGHT NOW LMAO!!!#'I've looked at your stats and inventories to try to make this serious but balanced but if it doesn't work we can retool it'#'I want to be extremely clear that this situation could kill destal so I want to be extremely sure that you're comfortable with that--#-- and with how the mechanics are designed around it'#I am fucking. on my KNEES WEEPING. at the contrast with how punishing and DEEPLY unfun felix campaign has relentlessly been the whole time#and how little of a fuck it feels like THAT DM gives when he's like 'this random rolltable encounter was deadly :)'#'you guys didn't get hit last time and got all your spells back right?' uhhh wrong and wrong and we TALKED about that last time#are you gonna revisit the balance on your fifth in a row 'if you fail you'll TPK' scenario? no? yeah I figured lol#christ knows HE'S never invited feedback on his DMing. you KNOW I don't feel safe to say 'hey this doesn't feel fair or fun' with him#AND LIKE!! WITH A DM I TRUST I FEEL SAFE ENOUGH TO REALLY PLAY WITH SOMETHING TERRIBLE HAPPENING!! YAY YIPPEE STAKES AND PATHOS!!!#I don't just want nothing bad to happen ever! but I don't want it to feel careless or heartless or just... Not Fun#anyway. grasping william's hands so tightly. my beloved friend. my wonderful friend. what a relief to have a DM that's good#after the shit we've been through in our now most-frequently-run campaign#the thing I'm mad about is that destal has been making a mystery saving throw every night-- but this was imperceptible to the characters#so we weren't acting on it#and now that he's failed it three times the situation is 'okay NOW you will be maming a con save every night and accumulating exhaustion'#'which can't be removed by sleeping' [six levels of exhaustion Kill You]#so like!! well okay I wish we had had ANY way of knowing how urgent this was before we got to 'now there's a deadly countdown' BUT OKAY#but like I said. he clearly put a lot of thought into the math for the mechanics#he made sure that we DO actually have ANYTHING we can do to mitigate the condition and outlined several options specifically and clearly#he checked in with justin about whether that seemed fair and opened it for future retooling if necessary#so I'm just at 'that was kind of a rugpull dude :/' instead of DESPAIRING lmao#this is a level of Oh Shit that's juicy! this is a level of Oh Shit that might force dramatic character choices out of desperation!#THIS IS AN OH SHIT WHERE WE STILL GET TO PLAY DND ABOUT IT AND HAVE ANY AGENCY WHATSOEVER. WHAT A CONCEPT.#ANYWAY!!! GOOD DND SAVE ME!!!!!!!!!
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lususnatura · 4 months ago
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🎤 🎤 🎤
a song that i associate with my muse meme!
AHH, hey, ramone!! thank you for sending in this prompt :D since you sent in three of the mic's, i shall now be treating you to three songs that make me think of blamore when i hear them / that i associate with it. an explanation of why i chose them will be in the tags <3
hozier - who we are.
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icehouse - crazy.
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depeche mode - personal jesus.
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#IT WAS PROBABLY NOTHING BUT IT FELT LIKE THE WORLD: musings.#asks - answered.#ooc post.#okay but ESPECIALLY heavy on the last one because it literally all about the idea of someone that people can turn to in hard times-#like a god or a prophet who will listen to your plights and help you + who you should believe in. and i say this because one major theme-#to blamore's character is the concept of being a false prophet and someone who essentially unfortunately takes advantage of people's-#longing for things to get better in gotham. bc i feel like a lot of people there have either been failed by the system by other's or-#possibly both and this is so that blamore can get people to voluntarily want to consume the 'seeds' it distributes in order to uhh...#well purge gotham of its undesirables basically as terrible as that sounds. but yeah that depeche mode song? it's such a good one for-#him and definitely has helped me before to write things related to him since blamore does sometimes believe in its own hubris.#but as for the second one by icehouse that one i associate with it because although it doesn't exactly consider itself to fully identify-#with the label of being a 'man' i feel as if blamore will still talk about itself that way sometimes. its relationship with its gender-#is honestly a little bit complicated NGL because him using it/its pronouns as well is something blamore adopted recently even-#though he'd always sort of felt like disconnected and/or like it didn't really align with how he saw himself completely. BUT yeahhh#i honestly could start a whole discussion about that but i shall do that another time perhaps ahah. anyhow though besides that-#elephant in the room ever since it has transformed into this half-human half-plant monster being... although it does love any partners-#it has very much (trust me) i feel like it does wonder why they chose to be with him more often than he'd like to admit.#so that's where the whole 'crazy' part comes in and as for the hozier song that song is about how you kind of have to carve through-#this 'darkness' to rediscover ourselves and who we want to be as a result of going through a rough time or just something tough in-#general and that is SO freaking fitting in my opinion for blamore because it definitely had to completely reframe the way it thought-#about itself when it transformed. and he also had to figure out what he believed in / what his values were now which can be suchhh-#a messy process TBH but this isn't the first time that blamore's had to rediscover itself as life is honestly kind of this ongoing-#process of losing yourself and trying to find yourself again you know? but yeah. i hope you enjoyed my explanation here tehe <3#and also that you enjoy the tunes!!
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imeminemp3 · 7 months ago
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wasim wearing a "trust black women" shirt while questioning bisma for wanting to figure out what she wants, who she wants to be, outside of what she's already made herself..... dude if you're gonna wear that then u need to practice it
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vampiricsheep · 8 months ago
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head's been full of bran-lily images lately. first proper date. bran always flustered and lily perpetually amused. I don't know what they have but it's good
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bisaster-energy · 1 year ago
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okay what you have to understand is that while against the kitchen floor is a dean song...willard! has cas written all over it
#guess who really started listening to will wood 😳#like just listen to me ok hear me out...#i dont owe u my heart or my body but shit i do fuckin owe u and im so sorry that i cannot be good as u are#the irony of dean not thinking of himself as human as cas learned to be is not lost on me#and even tho he fucks up constantly he cant bring himself to want cas to end their relationship (wtv it may be)#apologizing for the way he is bc tbh if dean never figures out how he feels simply because he himself doesn't know#what he wants he probably would end up just giving cas.his body because he owes him something and#he cant figure out what he can possibly give in the face of that all consuming frankly terrifying love#ahem. onto willard#ik i said cas knows how to be human but that's in dean's eyes. cas doesn't get being human at all even tho he does (?)#like his homeless/steve arc he cant get a grasp on how humans do all the things they do and live they way they live#the beginning of the song he talks about not being able to step on ants and crying for moths#now that could be cas talking about actual insect but ALSO humans! bc he's learned to care!!#but yea if cas had some sort of animal he saw every now and then while on the street? a cat or a rat etc that's how i envision#him with this song#he himself has been stepped on so many times! it started to feel like his place! not truly part of the winchesters not truly angel#just cas now...#is there room for me in your cage whether that be earth or a real rat he feels he understands#it's confusing for him to connect! never learned what to feel from childhood like humans do!#he was thrown into the deep end#they call me crazy but their words all seem made up to me -> honeybee cas fr#also i can see steve bringing a little creature into the gas n sip his own little guy#also the peace vs freedom thing. animals are put in cages. humans locked in heaven.#and cas has achieved free will but he has to wrestle with whether it's better to be content or break chains#you might seem behind bars but friend this cage is inside out! dean and sam are trapped in this destiny#but they both say fuck it !! but heaven wasn't just a cage to humans it's a cage for angels too#yeah ur fate is fucked but at keast you had a fate to change yknow. cas didn't just change his story#he didn't have one so he literally wrote it#i can't listen to this song without thinking about cas human hungry and alone#it's AWFUL out here socrates. it's DANGEROUS out here socrates. it's lonely out here socrates 🤡🤡🤡
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thanatoseyes · 9 months ago
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So we're in Avernus in my DND campaign and I play Hysteria a purple tiefling, fighter/warlock, my patron being Asmodeus, grand pa pa. We passed this mirror ice wall and my first instinct was to shatter it but I didn't. Instead hysteria was granted a wish. And you know what she wished for? For Asmodeus to be free. It didn't actually work entirely. But it did loosen a few chains and I think she started the apocalypse.
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thebleedingeffect · 9 months ago
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#okay I'm talking in the tags of this post cause shit is happening in my life and I gotta talk about it somewhere#one part of it is my step brother crashing and burning before my very eyes and there's nothing I can do to stop his own destructive actions#so it's just me watching this poor kid ruin his relationships and blame everything and everyone around him as he does so#despite the fact that he's undeniably been treated horribly at times- he's just turned that anger back onto others and himself#and I have no idea what to feel as I watch him get arrested. have drug problems. because I'm just waiting for the inevitable spiral#it doesn't help that my mom has been comparing us and saying that I'm the much better child and she wishes he was like me#not understanding that I could’ve been him if I was just more angry at the world at that age instead of being so sad and scared#and that leads me to my fucking mom cause like- I love her. we've been through alot of bad shit with her#I've almost done some really bad shit for her and I know that she loves me more than anything else#but it feels like its been getting more and more suffocating cause I'm not sure she's able to start seeing me as an adult#and start loosening her grip around me and let me breathe. to have my own experiences without her by my side#to be able to go places and imagine a future without her constantly by my side#she talks and it's like she doesn't even think to wonder that perhaps I want to form my own experiences#and experience the world on my own terms because I feel like I've spent my whole life having so little damn control#religious family. shit and neglectful father who turned into the exact opposite and nearly killed me. family who refuses to listen and talk#having to move and run immediately. put survival above all else. go to school. get out. and god I just wanna breathe#she loves me so much and I love her too. but I feel like I'll be sooner crushed if I stick here for long enough#I'm just mad that my life has been nothing but absolutely no love. sudden waves of intense love. absolutely nothing. sudden spike#and I feel like I'm just finally starting to form good. healthy relationships on my own terms and actually make friends#because I had no idea what I was doing when I was a kid cause I was so fucking lonely and hurting#now I just. gotta figure out how to tell my mom that I can't carry this expectation that I'll continue to stay forever by her side#it just feels like I'm her child first and a person second. and it sucks. it really sucks.#ough. spins and spins and spins and spins-
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hauntingblue · 10 months ago
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Kaido lore?!
#THE GIRL SANJI HIT HAS A RAT???#if sanji kills the rat he is not going back... this poor woman tho....#sanji didn't really get to dight his siblings so now he is kinda doing it lmao#sanji didn't hit her?? queen did??? omg. sanji don't lose hope.... but i want you to kinda do and succumb to the germa ajskdha#nvm he figured things out.... got the rat and everything... sanji talking to himself with the cage on... yeah..... omg zeff and luffy <3#omg queen got yeeted.... the rat.....#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 1061#king asking zoro if he is trying to be a king implies now that as sanji beat queen he is one. now when zoro beats king???. exactly.#omg... zoro dont kill king he is too pretty to die.... zoro.... i was wondering where all the nephilim fanart came from akdjsk#this is so slay... zoro with the king of hell enma fighting an angel.....#kaido with shackles in punk hazard???? is it bc he is an 'ogre'????#wtf.... zoro is seeing a biblically accurate angel akdjsns WAIT. did king say he isnt biologically capable of besting him.#and zoro said he doesnt like those types of excuses. because he is equaling that to what kuina said about being a woman.#please someone tell me this isnt the resolution to that. please. that is so stupid.#also wtf is zoro gonna do against that. thank god he learnt how to cut fire damn. thanks kinemon. hope izo and usopp find you soon#the music. the visuals. slay. oh :( goodbye my angel..... him thinking kaido is joyboy??? you've got it very twisted. it's kinda tragic#how his faith is misplaced and ends up defending evil and dying for it..... :(#the z on the end screen akdhaka.... now o want kaido lore. why was he im punk hazard. i mean ti be experimented on but there's gotta be more#you know whats funny. robin becoming a devil for luffy. zoro becomong king of hell for luffy. sanji just doesn't turn evil :) AHDHAJAJ#which actually could be the most dangerous maybe bc goodbye emotions xd even if the king of hell and a demon could end him#inch resting. i want more about lunarians?? and kaido now. also MORE about zoro and kuina... please that can't be it....#did i explain here how at least in the op spanish speaking fandom there is a gag that zoro is racist?? it started with that woman from bw#he just now killed a survivor of a nearly extinct (or extinct) race xd. you can appreciate why the gag exists#episode 1063#usopp looking for kinemon and the scene hes gonna walk into.... izo please get here soon....#usopp calling them suicidal samurais ajdhak he will cling to life sobbing and full of snot!!! EXACTLY!!! this is actually so helpful.....#like they really are suicidal samurais... committing seppuku for anything.... izo thank god. he's gonna get the kun treatment from now on#episode 1062
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softersinned · 2 years ago
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you ever think about a character who just got so spectacularly fucked over by canon that you really don't know where to even start with making it right so you kind of just have to hold them in your hands and say "i love you so much and someday i'll do right by you" because
#(thinking abt fiona dra.gon age today)#('fuck the chantry' ma'am i'd die for you)#(what i wouldn't have given for her to get to interact with hawke. or velanna.)#(or for her and alistair to have CONNECTED god i cry so hard whenever i reread the calling)#(do i need another character? no! will i write her anyway? probably!)#(god. god. god. thinking bout what would have happened if we could have gotten her instead of wynne)#(fiona carefully avoiding alistair for as long as she can because He Doesn't Know and seeing him with the amulet knowing it's hers)#(watching her son fall in love for the first time. knowing he's likely to die in the final battle.)#(or fiona in kirkwall??? or even. fuck. a real explanation for fiona to have allied with alexius)#(because she had to have a fucking reason)#(and it had to be good so like. was she being manipulated? we know blood mages can hold other people in a thrall)#(and given the threat from the chantry we know that there was real danger posed)#(but what would have prompted her to a.) invite in a foreign power while trying to stay safe in ferelden)#(and b.) invite in a foreign power that frequently engaged in the enslavement of elves)#(when she herself has such a painful history)#(and is now responsible for countless mages. including elves.)#(anyway. holds her in my hands. i love you. someday i'm gonna figure out how to do right by you.)#(also. nevarran fiona whose necromancy could make the mortalitasi blush. it's what i deserve.)#(thinkin bout cassandra too what if i just put everyone on the new multi and subject you all to watching me reblog about them constantly)#(cassandra has curly hair i want you all to know this she has thick curly hair and she cuts it v short so the curls are SO bouncy)#iv. tilting pretty sharply bitchward. ( marianning )
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lisbonsteresa · 2 years ago
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oh concrete stoop we’re really in it now
#yelling and screaming this is so PERFECT to me#tm#he's dying on the inside but he's trying so so hard to be supportive because he just wants her to be HAPPY#(even if he can't figure out how to say he wants her to be happy with him)#and she is SO --#(gorgeous she looks so pretty teresa lisbon just give me a chance)#she's so thrown?? the way her face falls a little before she says goodnight and then she tilts her chin up to kind of save face#and then HER face as she walks away because he's just NOT taking the bait#it usually takes just the slightest hint of a date - hell; that another man is interested - and he's (jealous) got SOMETHING to say#and she was clearly expecting it - the don't start and the cloth napkins and the hint of a smile with both - she's expecting SOME banter#SOME comment and he just....doesn't give it to her#the whole episode honestly; he's been keeping his thoughts/hurt feelings to himself and she's been waiting for him to say something#that's what they do; how they've worked for so long and now something's off kilter to her while he's trying to do what he thinks is best#(you think you know what's good for my life--)#and now she's worried and he's sad and i have to admit i'm having a great time#(do you think she's going to start questioning if he still has feelings for her? do you think they're going to have a big blowup#once he does something kind of petty after trying to play it cool for so long DO YOU THINK THEY'LL HAVE A BIG DRAMATIC CONFESSION SCENE#the you in question is the 4 people who read my 876 tags i'm kissing you all on the forehead thank you for bearing with me)
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windfighter · 2 years ago
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Okay so that one post made me curious how many different languages we are forcing the Frontier-kids to learn so if y'all would be so kind as to comment on/reblog this for science with any languages you headcanon them as learning, even if it was just for a one-off AU 10 years ago, that would be much appreciated :3
I'll go first so from me, here's what they get:
Takuya
Italian (because he moves there and becomes a famous football player)
English (because it's obligatory and also he becomes an internationally famous football player)
French (so he can flirt with Kouji's workmate (he learns french french though because it's the language of looooove~))
Kouji
Swedish (for DDH when he's digital adventuring with a bunch of Swedes)
French (the canadian version, because he ends up working with a person from there who refuses to speak anything else)
English (because he works with people from all over the globe)
Japanese sign language (a silly suggestion made when he was sick, but Kouichi forced him to go through with it)
American sign language (because he decided to force everyone he works with to learn signlanguage and they all agreed that ASL was the easiest to get classes on)
Kouichi
Swedish (For DDH as well)
Italian (he kinda had to because his partners (Junpei and Izumi) decided to move there so now he's a doctor in Italy because no way he's breaking up with them)
English (everyone gets english as a threat)
JSL (because it sounded like a fun thing to learn)
Italian sign language (to easier communicate with mute/deaf/other non-verbal patients in Italy without an interpreter)
Tomoki
English (because he's a gamer and games with people from all over the world)
Izumi
English (because it's obligatory)
Italian (actually she already knows that so does this count?)
Japanese (since I added Italian for her I guess I have to add japanese as well???)
Junpei
English (because it's obligatory)
Italian (because he moves to Italy to study music and wops now he lives there)
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psalmsofpsychosis · 27 days ago
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What Evil Means to Us, by C. Fred Alford
I always wonder what woud happen if bruce finally got what he wanted and got joker all figured out. Would he get bored of him? I think thats something that joker himself is scared of
It's definitely something Joker fears, yes. In Batman: Death of the Family, he basically jumps off a cliff rather than hear Bruce utter his name or his history, so panicked that he doesn't even consider that Bruce could be bluffing. As to Bruce figuring Joker out... hah. Arguably, he already has.
Bruce has always been obsessed with understanding Joker, and especially during his first decade as Batman. At the basis of it lies both a need for control and the hope that Joker could be rehabilitated, because if Bruce understands Joker, then maybe he could predict him and prevent his crime sprees. Perhaps Bruce could help Joker, have the leverage of Joker's humanity to use in order to reach him.
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Detective Comics #1027 -- Many Happy Returns
It's an essential component of their dynamic: Bruce desperately asking "why?" and Joker laughing in his face, symbolizing both Batman's need for constructing meaning and Bruce's need for connection and understanding. Something that Joker eternally resists.
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Batman (2016) #67 -- All The Way Down
But the paradox is that, at the same time, Bruce doesn't entirely want to figure Joker out. This is partly covered by a bigger pattern of behavior for Bruce that I talked about before-- the fact that, despite verbally supporting the rehabilitation of his Rogues, Bruce tends to be mean-spirited, distrustful and paranoid when it actually happens. In many ways he thinks of the Rogues as his; they're all in the dark, they're all wrestling with various kinds of demons, and Bruce includes himself in it. This is most apparent in Arkham Asylum: A Serious House on a Serious Earth, in which Bruce's biggest fear is the fact Arkham would feel like home. So... if the Rogues truly rehabilitated, what then? Where would that leave him? Bruce has a crippling fear of abandonment as a consequence of losing his parents, and it extends to this.
It's true for Joker more than for anyone else, I suppose. Bruce refuses to let Joker die, even in bonkers circumstances in which his code would allow for it. He also has apparently known all along what he needs to do in order to... undo Joker. If Death of the Family established anything, it's that Bruce never needed to kill Joker in order to get him to stop. The end shows that Bruce knows Joker very well, and thus he knows that the thing Joker fears most is the ghost of his own past. All he needed to do was hint that he had uncovered Joker's history, and Joker basically committed suicide. Yet Bruce hasn't used this before, and he hasn't used it against Joker since.
But I absolutely need to mention the controversial and dubiously-canonical Batman: The Three Jokers (intended to be a spiritual successor to Batman: The Killing Joke) that explores the idea that Joker might've been separate people over time (but not really). This comic is disliked for very valid reasons, but it does something very interesting, at least in the realm of the hypothetical: it shows that Bruce has known who Joker was and where his family is all along. Coupled with the fact that this comic specifically connects The Comedian to New 52 and Endgame... it implies that at least in this story, Bruce wasn't bluffing when he said he knew Joker's real identity in Death of the Family.
But he doesn't use it. Not in Endgame, not in The Three Jokers. I talked about this story more extensively here, but the reasoning that he does it to protect Joker's hidden family is very weak, because Bruce could just omit the fact Jeannie and her child survived. If he's worried about the paper trail, it's ridiculous to assert that Batman doesn't have the resources to fake their death certificates or bury the clues. Hell, the press wouldn't need to find out, he could only tell the truth to Joker and watch him unravel as a result. But he doesn't! In his own words...
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Batman: The Three Jokers #3
So... this comic basically goes to show that Bruce wouldn't get bored if he figured out the "mystery" of Joker. Rather that he'd just keep it a secret, and maintain the status quo (even though it's painfully selfish and destructive of him to do so). And even if you see The Three Jokers as out of main continuity, Death of the Family remains as a testament to the fact Bruce knows Joker. He knows what might get Joker to stop, but he's only ever threatened it and never resorted to it since, despite seeing proof of it working.
At the end of the day, Bruce getting bored with Joker is unlikely. It would be a real possibility if their dynamic was based only on Bruce's curiosity and obsession regarding Joker, but it isn't. That's simply a component of it, one of the pillars. Bruce needs Joker in other ways-- bigger ways, that overshadow knowing Joker's name. Joker needs to remain an equal who can oppose Batman... and thus, he keeps coming back, whether he likes it or not. Bruce drags him with him; and I wish I was being metaphorical, but this is literally what Bruce did in Going Sane and the nebulous time between Batman (2011) #48 and Dark Days: The Casting.
The tragedy, though, is that Joker would never trust Batman to still be there outside of the murder and the mayhem he thinks Batman needs. The thought of Bruce caring about him outside of his Joker persona is an impossibility... because Joker utterly hates who he used to be, and sees no value in himself (or anything, for that matter). He can't comprehend Bruce valuing him as a human being, worth knowing or saving.
#hi good morning sorry for the outrageous addition but also: head in hands head in hands#love it when Joker goes “fuck the past i am what i make of myself NOW not what i have been” very Bruce Wayne of him#honestly Batman stories are the best when they're about constructed personas and identity crises#and not *motions hand in a vague manner* whateverthefuck#but also i DO think Bruce wants to figure Joker out as an idea and a concept; a thought framework if you will#but that doesn't necessarily involve Joker's history. Yes his personal history is important but like—#you dont really need a fella's name to figure out the philosophy that makes them. That and Bruce likes it hard#he's an intellectual he NEEDS everything to be a problem he needs a complex answer he gets terrified when stuff get easy and simple#and cheap. He actively pushes against easy answers; i think that's also one of the reasons he keeps himself from fully discovering the Joke#because he likes the challenge and the process of discovering him; the struggle. But also the familiarity of the framework#he's currently in with Joker. When you solve a problem you go to the next level; the problem evolves and finds a new face#and 37 additional limbs. Bruce has so little predictability in his life he CLINGS to known danger;#familiar pain rather than unfamiliar comfort#but also yeah Joker's supposed ''fear of the past'' will forever be so intriguing to me#Joker's ''i am worthless as i am; i have to make something else out of myself'' sentiment is arguably the very thing that makes him#so painfully human and relatable#batjokes#batjokes meta#bruce wayne#bruce wayne meta
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