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hauntedflamingo · 4 years ago

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Hold Up! What Happened?

Credit to whoever owns the picture.

Brian x fem!reader

Warning: kinda controlling boyfriend

A/N: on Imbd it doesn’t have his last name so the hashtags might be messed up. That is also going to be a problem whenever I finish my Ace one from Nancy Drew. Some of this sounds okay. The rest of it, I’m not so sure. Sorry for any mistakes.

“Ready to eat?” You boyfriend calls from across the way when he spots you waiting outside the restaurant. As he walks closer to you, he stops in his tracks, touching his back pocket to check for his wallet. “I left my wallet!”

Here we go again. “What do you do with your money?” You shout, narrowing your eyes at his ‘sudden realization’. “You never pay for anything.”

“I told you I don’t have my wallet.” He reiterates as his voice becomes louder while he starts his trek towards you again. “You should be more worried about my wallet than me not paying!”

“Yeah right.” You mutter to yourself. “I’m tired of this.” Briefly looking up at the sky, you make your decision. “I’m breaking up with you.” This had been a long time coming and you were finally at your breaking point.

“Come on. Let’s go talk about this.” He wraps his hand around your wrist, holding you close. “You are being irrational.”

“No! I’m not!” You yank your arm out of his grasp. “This is the last straw. I’m done!” You shout as you start to walk backwards. Spinning on your heel, you walk face first into a disaster.

“Oh my gosh!” You shriek as leftover food and drinks are poured onto your body. It feels like you were hit by a freight train.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t see you.” The busboy apologizes over the sound of shattering glass.

“Can this day get any worse?” You ask yourself through clenched teeth.

Out of nowhere, he grabs his towel, trying to mop up the liquid trailing down your outfit. His effort to save your dress is useless as the liquid continues to spread. Why did you decide to wear a new dress today?

“Just. Stop.” You beg, your eyes shining with tears. You were humiliated enough without any more of his help.

He drops his hand as registers your plea. When he lifts his head, he notes the panic on your face and starts to speak softly. “Look. I have some clothes in my car. You can borrow them.” You slightly nod your head, knowing that if you tried to speak you would be done for. He runs to his car while you stand still, working on controlling your breathing before you burst into tears.

The busboy returns a few minutes later, handing you a shirt, sweatpants and a pair of flip flops. “Thanks.” You whisper, holding them at arm’s length so they don’t get dirty. Another wave of embarrassment hits you as you walk inside. You can feel everyone staring as you pass them so you keep your sights on the bathroom, not wanting to see their cruel smiles.

Your shoes don’t help with the situation. They are filled with someone’s drink so they squish with every step which makes your voyage to the bathroom excruciating slow. And you are pretty sure that is part of the reason everyone else is staring at you. As you enter the bathroom, you set the clothes on the counter and grab a million paper towels. Carefully sliding your purse off your arm, you inspect it closely. “My purse is unharmed.” You mutter as you set your it on the counter next to the clothes. Looking at yourself in the mirror above the sink, you check out the damage. Miraculously, your face and hair were also missed by the barrage of debris. One less thing to worry about.

But your dress is a totally different story. Ketchup and coffee stains are splattered across your chest along with some other things you can’t make out. The rest of your dress, well, it is just as bad and everything is making it stick to your skin.

Turning around, you lean against the counter and slip off your heels. Wiping off your feet with a wet paper towel before sliding on the flip flops. You check your legs for any blood in case the broken glass hit them. “Good thing I painted my toenails last night.” You whisper, picking up your shoes and looking inside of them. How am I supposed to clean these? What if they get moldy and start to stink? I guess these are garbage now. Placing them back on the floor, you move on to the next part of your dilemma.

“Eww.” You cringe as you start to pick off particles of food from your arms and legs with a paper towel. Unbuttoning you dress, you peel it off and look down at your bra. The liquids managed to soak through your dress and into your bra. How many cups were in that bucket?

“My bra too? Great!” You sarcastically talk to yourself as you unhook it and pull it off, throwing it into the sink. You rinse it out and try to wring it out without disfiguring the whole thing. “I can’t even wear it. How am I going to do this?” You mutter to yourself. “How many people are out there?” Thoughts run through your head as you look at yourself in the mirror. I can’t wear a shirt with no bra. Please let this shirt be big enough. You already embarrassed yourself enough, why not continue. At least my underwear is dry enough to still wear.

You use wet soapy paper towels to wipe off the excess that soaked through your clothes onto your body.

Drying yourself off with another paper towel, you quickly pull on the clean shirt and catch a whiff of something. Is this what he smells like? He smells nice. Cool it, Y/N. You barely broke up with your boyfriend.

You lean down and pull on the pants before someone walks into the bathroom. Dropping your dress in the sink, you let the water run on it as you walk over to the soap dispenser. In the middle of slamming the button on the soap dispenser, the bathroom door swings open. Two women share a look before walking past you to the stalls. You think they would be nice enough to give you some sort of advice on how to clean your clothes, but nooooo.

After desperately rubbing the soap filled paper towel on your dress and getting nowhere, you let out a growl. “This isn’t working!” You twist your dress to get out the excess water before folding it up along with your bra. You grab your purse and shoes, letting out a breath before pushing open the door with your shoulder.

As you step outside the bathroom, you are greeted by none other than sabotage boy.

“Can I make it up to you?” His eagerness intrigues you. Is he genuinely being nice or is it only because he is at work? "No. Thanks-." You scan his chest, looking for a name tag. He picks up on your cue. “My name is Brian.”

Brian. You mentally repeat. Looking back up at him, his eyes catch you off guard. What color are they? You were too in shock earlier to notice them. “Um…” You clear your throat. “I was thinking about throwing the dress away. I was trying to clean it in the bathroom but I made it worse.”

“At least let me buy you lunch.” He offers, leaning against the wall. “That’s why you were coming this way, right?”

“You already let me borrow your clothes. I don’t want to put you out any more.”

“It’s my fault.”

“Maybe if I was watching where I was going.”

“Well, it sounded like you were too busy having a fight to pay attention to what you were doing.”

“How do you know that?” You wonder out loud. “Everyone heard you screaming at him.” His explanation as to why he was even listening to your conversation in the first place. “I wasn’t screaming.” You scowl. “He is selfish among other things. So, I broke up with him. He deserves it.”

“Brian!” His boss yells the man’s name to grab his attention. Brian jumps, standing up straight. “Gotta go.” He walks away, heading over to the table he was cleaning before you exited the bathroom.

The stares continue as you walk over to the line to buy your lunch. Doing your best to ignore them, you look for a table inside, keeping far away from the windows. You didn’t want to be reminded of your incident. Setting your clothes on the chair next to you and hooking your purse on the back of the chair, you sit down waiting for your food. After a few minutes, your food is delivered to your table and you can finally start eating.

Every chance he gets, Brian stops by your table to check up on you. One of the times he stops by, he lifts up an empty paper bag, laying it on the table across from you. “This is for your clothes.”

“Thanks.” Picking up your drink, you take a sip. He lingers for a moment, longer than the other twenty times when he stopped by. “You never told me your name.”

“Oh. My name?” I didn’t know we were doing this. You already planned on never returning to the restaurant no matter how much you liked the food. “It’s Y/N.”

“Hi, Y/N. I’m Brian.” He gives you a little wave.

“Hi.” Doing your best to hold in your giggles as you set your drink back on the table.

“That’s a relief.”

“What?”

“I made you laugh. I thought you were going be angry forever.”

Finishing your lunch in record time, you dump your clothes in the bag and grab your purse. The accident already took up enough time and you needed to get to work.

As you exit the restaurant, Brian spots you, walking over to you again.

“You cleaned up the mess?” You state the obvious.

“I have to. It’s my job.” He smiles at your observation.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.” He insists. “You look nice in my clothes, by the way.”

“Thanks.” You mumble, waving and walking away before he can say anything else.

Grabbing your jacket off your office chair, you slide it on and zip it up before anyone else can look at you. Sitting down at your desk, your coworker spins around in her chair to greet you. “What are you wearing?” She gasps, astonished by your choice of clothes. ”I ran into a busboy when I went to go eat and ruined my dress and shoes.” You state as turn on your computer and stare at it while you wait for it to load.

She scoots her chair over to you. “Was he cute?”

“Yeah. But I broke up with my boyfriend today so...” You spin around in your chair since she wasn’t going to let this conversation go.

“Finally. How did that go?” She changes the subject, more interested in the new boy than your previous flame. “Did you get busboy’s number?”

You point to the clothes you were wearing.

“That bad huh. Well, now you can date the busboy.” She scoots her chair back over to her desk. “How were your classes?”

“They were okay. I have some homework and studying for a quiz that I need to do later.”

Your boss happens to walks by and stops at your desk. “What happened to you, Y/N?” Did everyone have to comment on your appearance today? Your coworker answers for you without missing a beat. “A cute boy dumped food on her.” You shake your head at her comment and answer your boss. “I didn’t have time to go home and change.”

As you turn back to your computer, you mumble to yourself. “I’m going to have to return his clothes sooner or later.”

“Those are his?” Your coworker squeals as she scoots back over to you, lightly smacking you on the arm. “He gave you his clothes after he bumped into you. That is so sweet.”

“I don’t think he had a choice.” As you continue to doubt his sincerity, you log into the computer and start working.

Once you get home, you eat dinner and start on your homework. Before bed, you change out of Brian’s clothes, throwing them into the hamper and change into your pajamas. Lying in bed, your eyes snap open as you remember your conversation from earlier. Oh. No. That means I have to go back over there to return his clothes. Or maybe he won’t miss them.

Tag list: @writingformany, (@lovesanimals I didn’t know if you wanted to be tagged in this so I tagged you anyway sorry)

#brian charmed #brian charmed cw #charmed reboot #charlie gillespie imagine #charlie gillespie x reader #flip flops

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marvelismadnessmademagnificent · 4 years ago

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Venomous

Venom Eddie Brock smut

⚠️smut/ mention of attempted rape/ burglary/ cursing/ angry sex⚠️

It was night time in manhattan, NY, and you were going about your usual rounds at the bar you worked at. You had 30 minutes until your shift was over. You couldn't wait.

It was a slow Friday night, not too many customers, just a few stragglers here and there. You were cleaning a glass as a man around his mid 30's walked in and sat on your bar stool.

"What can I get ya? Will it be a red? Or a Mary for ya tonight?" You asked sweetly.

"No I'll just have a beer." Said the man sounding extremely gruff.

"Alrighty then. Anything else?"

"Yeah." He nodded

"What'll it be sir?" You asked.

"I'll take a bit of bourbon too."

"Comin right up." You said setting his beer in front of him. "So don't mind my asking. But what's got you in the dumps buddy?"

"I'm don't wanna talk about it."

"Come on bud, talking about it always helps."

He stayed quiet drinking his beer.

"Come on man..." you said once more.

"I SAID I DONT WANNA TALK ABOUT IT!" He raised his voice, also sounding like another had joined him.

What little bit of people were in the joint, looked at him for a minute and three went back to their drinks and conversations.

"Look if I wanted to talk about it, I would have gone to a therapist not a fucking bar." He said lowly.

"Alright man, I get it. But seriously a bit of advice... drinking your sorrows or anger away isn't the answer. And hey I just want what's best for my customers." You sighed in resignation.

"Yeah right!" He laughed.

"If I didn't why would I be telling you that alcohol isn't the answer? Look around bud! This is where I work, where I get the cash, this is where I earn a living. I'm warning you away from all this. That's less money for me! So get your head out of your ass and start thinking about the long term affects of shit!" You raised your voice, slamming a glass down after you dried it off.

"Whatever! I'm outta here!" He slammed his credit card on the counter. I rung him up and handed his card back. He snatched it from my hand. And took his beers and walk out the door not even bothering to get his receipt.

Everyone in the bar was looking at you again. You just shook your head and yelled, " what are you all lookin at?! Get back to what you were doin!"

At 11:00 pm the shift was finally over. You changed out of your work uniform and back into your regular clothes. You were walking on your way home when you suddenly felt a jerk come from your purse.

"What the hell!" You swiftly turn around to come face to face with a drunken man with blonde hair and brown eyes.

"Give me the purse lady!"

"No fucking way loser!" You stomped his foot. "Get a job like the rest of us!"

He overpowered you, no longer focusing on the purse but he was now grabbing at your skirt.

"Get away from me!" You yelled as he ripped your skirt.

"Not happening bitch!" He said moving to fully remove your skirt.

You screamed in fear. Never had this happened before on your way home.

-??? POV-

We heard a scream from across the city. We were planning on getting drunk off our asses tonight but nooooo! We had to save a petulant little human.

Remind me why we have to save these humans again Eddie?!

Because we are the good guys Venom! We save people! We don't kill them!

We only eat the bad ones right?

Right.

As usual we got there a little late the girls skirt was already torn and the guy had a knife to her neck and seemed to be getting himself off to her discomfort.

She squealed trying to get away from him.

"One more sound pretty and you won't be alive to feel me fucking you." Said the man.

We growled at the thought of the man raping and hurting the beautiful bartender who had served us earlier tonight. We like a feisty woman and she was no exception. I had accepted the fact that maybe she actually did care about her customers but Venom was in the back of my mind saying, what are you doing Eddie! She's lying! What kind of human is so good like that?

And somehow I found myself agreeing with him. No woman could ever have been so perfect in my eyes except maybe my ex fiancé but that doesn't matter now. Venom growled and we pounced tearing the man from her. We threw him against the wall of a back alley building. He groaned as he tried to get up. We pulled him back into our grasp as we held him against the wall.

"What the hell are you!" The man gasped.

"We are Venom!" We said together.

We looked to the the lady and made him face her. "What do you want us to do to him?"

She just looked at us in awe. I have to say her gaze was making me hungry. And not the stomach growling kind.

And unfortunately every time Venom takes over my body the alcohol fades and I end up being sober before I even get a chance to get drunk off my ass.

But hell if I could save her from this motherfucker every time I would damn sure maker get my new addiction.

"I...I don't... I don't know..." she said her eyes not leaving ours.

We were at odds. Kill him! We should kill him. Tear him limb from limb and then gauge his eyes out and stick them up his ass. Or! Or! We cut off his dick and feed it to him or shove it up his ass!

Where do you even get these ideas Venom?

Meh watching stuff here and there...

How about something less gory and visual...

Fine... pussy.

I'm not a pussy I'm just doing the right thing plus we don't want to terrify the woman!!!

Fine. Fine. Let's just eat the guy already!

"What do you want us to do with HIM?!" We said together.

The man looked her in the eyes. "Please! Please don't kill me! I.. I have kids!" He lied.

"Let the cops have him..." she said looking away from the man.

"You're lucky your fate was in HER hands!" We released him and had her call the police. Not even five minutes later did we hear sirens. Venom receded back into me. Revealing myself to the woman. She gasped. I held the guy in a choke hold until the cops retrieved him from my arms. I hid her body behind me so the cops wouldn't see her in her panties. I turned my back to the authorities and took off my jacket and wrapped it around her. I zipped it up and it looked more like a nightgown on her than anything. So she was covered as much as she could be from prying eyes. I mean yeah they were cops but they were still men.

The cops asked her what happened and I prayed to whatever God is out there, that she wouldn't tell them about Venom.

She's not going to tell them about us.

How do you know Venom?!

She knew we saved her and we didn't hurt her like we could have. She owes us. Plus I can still hear her heartbeat. She's attracted to us.

Whatever you say bud.

She walked over to us as the cops took the scumbag away.

"Uh are you Uh umm alright? I uh sorry if I... We scared you. Please don't tell-" I started my stutter making itself apparent.

"Shut up." She said pulling on my neck collar of my shirt and she smashed her lips against mine.

-Your POV-

I don't know how my attraction for him overthrew my self control but I smashed my lips to his. He groaned as I bit his lip. I took the kids to the next level and I fought with him for dominance. But I let him win. We pulled apart for air and gasped.

"My... my name is (Y/n)..." I gasped out.

"I'm.... Eddie. My name's Eddie." He said claiming my lips once more. He held me tight against him and I felt him harden against my abdomen. I moaned into the kiss and forced myself away.

"Not... not here... my place just down the block... house 382." I said kissing him again.

"House 382..." he kissed me once more, "Here we come." He said as he picked me up bridal style.

*10 minutes later-Eddie's POV*

She unlocked her apartment door and we were kissing our way into her apartment. She started tugging at my shirt and I threw it over my head. We found ourselves at a staircase and I picked her up bridal style once more. I put her back in her feet. She tugged my hand beckoning me to follow her. She opened a door and led me into what seemed to be the master bedroom. She crawled on the bed facing me on her knees as her hands unzipped my jacket from around her. I lunges for her kissing her sweet lips and I began unbuttoning her shirt.

-your POV-

"Please..." you gasped out.

"Are... are you sure? I don't want to scare you off."

"Trust me if that... umm Venom couldn't scare me off I don't think you will." You said hastily wanting him to get out of those pants.

"If Your sure babygirl." He said claiming your lips once more as his hands moved to caress your breast. Moving his thumb under the fabric of your bra, he flicked your nipple and tweaked it. You mewled and arched your chest closer to him.

He removed his hand and went to unclad your bra. As he did so your red lace bra came undone and he threw it across the room not caring where it landed. His eyes met your briefly before taking you in. You could hear his sharp intake of breath as he looked at you.

"Your beautiful... God (Y/n)." He said as he lowered his mouth onto yours peppering kisses from your lips to your neck, collar bone, chest, breast, all the way until his mouth latched onto your nipple. Taking your bud into his mouth as he began to nip lightly at your skin. Then he flicked his tongue over it. He sucked your bud as if he were a thirsty new born babe. You moaned as he nipped your bud and sucked leaving would be love bites as he went to your other breast. Giving it the same treatment until you were a moaning mess underneath him.

"God damn it (Y/n)! Your making me want to lose control!" He growled kissing you as he began unbuckling his belt and trying to free himself of his pants. You got tired of him fumbling with his pants and you got up onto your knees once more and took your hands and roughly pulled his pants down.

He groaned at the friction. "Damn it woman!" He said claiming your lips in a blazing passion that set your insides on fire.

He peppered kisses down from you jawline all the way to your abdomen. His finger circled around the slit of your panties as he slowly pulled them down. He groaned at the wetness pooling at your core. The slight friction from those actions alone made your hip arch trying to get his hand closer to where you needed him.

"Patience baby patience." He mumbled as he lined his face with your entrance. You could feel his breath against you and if you hadn't had waterfalls down there before you sure as hell did now.

"Please!" You cried out not wanting to wait anymore.

At your sudden outburst he licked at stripe up and down your slickness. Then he gave kitten licks as he tasted you. He then lightly nibbled your nub. You arched your back crying out at the sudden pain and pleasure being racked through your body.

You needed him so badly and yet here he was teasing you. You felt like you were on the brink of madness.

"Please Eddie!" You moaned as he moved his tongue faster than before, adding a finger into your core. Then one more turned into two more until you were about to have the biggest orgasm of your life. As soon as he felt you about to reach your high, he withdrew from you. You whimpered in protest as he did so.

He chuckled as he tugged his boxers off. You gulped as you saw his size.

He saw your reaction and smirked.

"I think your ready for me, don't you babygirl?" He asked you.

You nodded eagerly as you so badly needed your release. The sweet release that he had so bitterly refused you. He kissed you with that same fire that had. Started it all. You could feel the heat build up once more to such an Insufferable rate you whined trying to get closer to his bulging cock.

He chuckled into the kiss as soon as you readied yourself to buck into him once more he had already placed himself at your entrance. He entered you in one swift motion causing pain like you've never known before to ripple throughout your body. It didn't help the fact that you had literally bucked into him as he was entering you. He had wanted to go slow and gentle whilst entering but you were impatient and incredibly greedy for his touch. He groaned in your mouth as he felt himself hit your core in that single thrust. He eyes rolled to the back of his head as he felt his member throb inside of you wanting- no needing to move. But he waited for you to tell him when he could move so as not to hurt you.

A moment passed and you moaned as pleasure started coursing through you as the pain dissipated. You rolled your into his. He took that as his cue to move. And boy did he. He started off gently drawing out your moans and pants as much as he could until he, himself was needing you as much as you needed him.

You were about to cum when he growled in your ear as his bit your earlobe. "Don't cum until I say so..."

Gone was the gentleman who had carried you bridal style into your home. Before you now was a incredibly sexy beast of a man ready to take you, mark you, and claim you as his. And his alone. He began pumping in and out of you at an unbelievably fast pace. Animalistic growls could be heard from him as your moans only grew louder and louder.

"That's right baby that's right (Y/n). Let the whole neighborhood hear you!" He growled in your ear. He rubbed his thumb over your clit as he began hitting your core nonstop. Tears had built up in your eyes and were threatening to spill. The pleasure was beginning to be too much to bare as you held back your building orgasm. You knew you couldn't hold it much longer and he knew it too.

His eyes were starting to droop as he felt your walls tightening around his member and at that he also felt himself getting ready to cum. "Oh shit, oh God! Fuck (Y/n)!" He said pushing through the clenching of your walls. You cried out as pain and pleasure mixed together once again.

"Fuck! (Y/n) cum with me! Cum with me babygirl!" He groaned out loudly as he was about to spill his seed into you.

"Aaaaahhh I'm... I'm coming!" You said as your extremely powerful orgasm overcame you. Your previous unspilled orgasm along with the one that had been building up was finally released as he too hit his climax.

He fell to the side so as not to crush you with his weight. Panting he tucked your hair behind your ears. And whispered sweet nothings in your ear as you fell asleep. But before you passed out completely, you heard him say, "God I think I'm in love. Feisty, loyal, and absolutely beautiful, yep I'm done for..." he chuckled as you passed out snug into his chest with your arms wrapped around him.

So that's that folks another one done. I think I might have over did it and I might have to think of a lot more cuz... well... damn! That was pretty intense in my opinion. But hey if you guys have any ideas, feel free to put them in the comment section below or otherwise. I will certainly look at them and take them into consideration! And if I don't know enough about it, well I will research it. So I got you!💯🔒

Author out!🤟✌️✍️📝

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bookscapadesblog · 4 years ago

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Rules for Being a Girl by Candace Bushnell and Katie Contugno (SPOILERS)

I just finished this book about 20 minutes ago and boy do I have some things to say (a lot apparently judging by the size of this post sorry not sorry) That being said, do not read past the flames if you don’t want it to be ruined!

Honestly I’m just gonna jump right into this in a stream of thoughts

Right from the beginning, literally like page 2 this book was relatable when they introduced Bex as the cool and hot younger teacher that everyone had crushes on. If you didn’t have one of those at your school please tell me where you went because my middle and high school had at least 5 I can think off the top of my head

Page 4: Marin’s bf pinches her side when she walks up to their lunch table. Ok cool. My bf pokes me in the side and I do the same all the time. Totally normal.

AND THEN his friend is like “checking to make sure she isn’t getting fat?” And my mouth dropped open and I was like wtf that’s RUDE.

And then I thought about it and realized I have literally heard so many jokes like that from so many guys and it just registers a little differently when you’re reading it on a page.

Me going through my memory banks for every slightly sexist joke I’ve heard in my 25 years of life:

When Bex offers to drive Marin home I’m literally thinking that is so fucking weird why would he do that you’re an idiot you could lose your job

And then he tells her “hey don’t tell anyone I could get in trouble” and I’m like oh you’re a terrible person you know exactly what you’re doing 😑

As soon as Chloe started acting cold about Marin knowing Bex was writing a novel and hanging out with him during her sisters chess tournament I knew something was up. But was it just normal jealousy that her BFF got to hang out with the hot teacher 🤔

Ok. Ride offer #2. You’re literally asking to be fired dude. And then you’re going to take her to your apartment? That’s not weird or anything.

When Bex kissed Marin I was literally sitting there like 🤢 and her stream of thoughts are probably similar to every girl/women who has ever experienced unwanted advances from a guy

My heart was literally breaking when she was replaying it in her head and trying to think about whether she should tell someone but like “it’s just Bex it’s not that big of a deal” so then I was thinking about how this book better end with his ass in jail

AND THEN when she tried to tell Chloe and she basically victim blamed her and told her she was being dramatic and stuff I was like nooooo 😭😭😭 please support your friend

After finishing the book Chloes reaction made sense since she was being manipulated by the same disgusting POS. So now I hate him even more

The part when their principle brings up the poor girl to go through EVERY SINGLE uniform violation in front of everyone was awful

Personally I never had any issues with dress code but that’s because in high school (and still mostly tbh) I had zero fashion sense and was usually in jeans or sweats and a T-shirt 🤷🏻‍♀️

But just like in this book, the dress code was geared to “stop girls from distracting boys with their clothes” 😒😒😒😒😒😒😒

Marin’s editorial for the newspaper titled “Rules for Being a Girl” was spot on. Chances are if you’re a woman you’ve experienced every thing she mentioned at least once. I want to photocopy it and throw it at every male i come in contact with

Obviously Bex was not going to like it because he felt personally attacked by it. Which...ya know...if the shoe fits 🤷🏻‍♀️

And then her boyfriend was such a Dick about it and asked her if she was on her period and then she DUMPED HIM

I was over here like:

And then she calls Bex out for his list of short stories only having white male authors. Like YOU TELL HIM

Side note: this made me think of one of my favorite short stories from English class: The Lottery by Shirley Jackson. Very dark but very good

The part where Marin is helping her sister with her hair and get ready to go out and she convinces her to wear her glasses was so important to me. I’m a big sister too and I’ll be damned if I ever see either of my sisters changing themselves for a man

Ms. Klein is the teacher I would have wanted to be if I was any good at science. Unfortunately I am not so here we are...

Also would like to join a feminist book club (or any book club really) when we’re allowed to see real people again

I like that even though it’s only briefly mentioned, they bring up the fact that there is very little support for girls sports in high school (and honestly college and professionals too).

Gray is the cute, feminist bf every girl needs. He is so supportive. But also I LOLED when he got caught for watching the handmaids tale movie instead of reading the book

Marin’s parents were also so supportive of her and placed all the blame exactly where it belonged...on the pervy teacher

When Bex was investigated and didn’t get in any sort of trouble after Marin told the principle I was disappointed but not surprised which is sad

When Chloe got angry at Marin and started pulling away I kinda guessed that she was seeing Bex

When Marin didn’t get into Brown because of Bex I was so angry. And then he had the AUDACITY to say she tried to ruin his life?!? SIR YOU RUINED YOUR OWN LIFE TRYING TO HOOK UP WITH YOUR STUDENT

He deserved worse than her painting on his stupid car

Pushing Jacob into lockers? Yes keep going

Me at this point:

I was sad when she freaked out and broke up with Gray but understood where she was coming from but still I was like 🥺

Learning that Chloe had been in a relationship with Bex wasn’t a surprise but still sucked. Their editorial together was a powerful move since he was in charge of the school paper

I’m glad Chloe pressed charges and hope Bex, though imaginary, spends lots of time in prison and his life is ruined 🥰

Basically this was a great Women’s History Month read and I’d recommend it to any one and everyone. It does a great job of showing the subtle sexism women and girls experience that’s become so completely normal people barely bat an eye.

Anyway, girl power, ovaries before brovaries, chicks before dicks etc

#books #reading #bookblogger #young adult #read ya #booklr #rules for being a girl #candace bushnell #katie cotugno

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thebibliomancer · 5 years ago

Text

Dark Crystal Age of Resistance ep 4 liveblog

“The First Thing I Remember is Fire”

Just a stream of thoughts.

Dammit the logo caught on fire. This is why they didn’t want open flames on the sets!

Gelfling are just super racist against Podlings.

A Guard: “Shut up, you’ll give everyone nightmares with that wailing!”

Hup: -sings louder, out of spite-

Sooooooooo Deet has decided to be a cryptid.

For Gelfling are a superstitious and cowardly lot.

Flew around wailing and screeching until A Guard and B Guard took off in a frighten and then rescued Hup.

“Thra’s true balance will be found when natural order is sound.”

Dark Crystal loves its weird, random prophecies. But they’ve got nothing on Redwall.

-Brea, breaks the secret door-

Why is there a secret room at the end of the secret passage under a secret door in the throne secretly that has the symbols of the seven clans?

Brea: “Oh, its a puzzle!”

Hey, yeah, this is coming off a little Legend of Zelda…

“I have to put the clans in their natural order, from highest to lowest, and then Thra will be in balance” =| ffs brea

You done learned a classism, growing up.

Dammit puzzle room, don’t reward her for classism! Orrr racism?

Brea is having a hard time ranking the clans once she gets past the ‘well obviously the Vapra are the best’

Wow, good job, modern puppeteers. You’ve made the Skeksis eating even grosser. And in the original movie it was a sort of cathartic trash the set sort of scene.

Wow, very gross.

Oh, this specific gross banquet is in honor of the Ornamentalist. So of course everyone spends the entire time whining about how food is like ash in their mouths compared to drinking soul goo.

Soul goo is crackier than crack. One sip and the Skeksis are all super hooked on it and already jonesing for another hit.

And the Ornamentalist is just annoyed.

Ornamentalist: “Essence, essence, essence! That’s all any of you talk about since I returned. It’s my party. Talk about me!”

Of course, the Ornamentalist would gladly try a hit but there’s none left.

Awww, they didn't invite Scientist to the party. They locked him in his lab until he finishes his mad science chores.

All the Skeksis are talking about wiping out the entire Gelfling population and Chamberlain is the only one thats not stupid about the horrific act of eating souls to maintain youth.

Chamberlain: “A wise shepherd does not cull entire herd, yes? We should take only what Gelfling we need to survive!”

Gourmand: “Moderation is for the meek!”

I again wonder how these dinguses managed to rule the planet for a thousand years without using it all up.

Chamberlain just called the General a coward. And the other Skeksis are just going FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

General: “I welcome war!”

Chamberlain: “Because you are too thick-headed to use brain!”

General: -affronted gasp-

And the Emperor is too busy PULLING HIS FINGER OFF to pay much attention

Gross. You’re getting pus… everything was already disgusting and you’ve found the way to make it worse, Emperor

So he wants instant results and starts yelling at the Chamberlain who can just shrink down and go ‘he started it’

Aww Emperor just dumped Chamberlain as his favorite counselor and his new bff is the general

Woow the general wasn’t kidding. The instant Chamberlain doesn’t have the Emperor’s favor, the General smacks Chamberlain to the floor and stomps on his hand.

I almost feel bad for him.

And now several minutes of Aughra complaining about how old she is and yelling at the ground to shut up until someone shoots plot arrows around her.

And the Emperor rolls into the lab to mock the Scientist for having no friends. Wow.

So the Scientist finished repairing the soul suck machine, with the bondage chair upgrade like in the movie.

Emperor: “How many Gelfling must we drain to cheat death for all eternity?”

Scientist: ‘thats fucked up, dude’

Or more seriously, the Scientist is actually worried about the Darkening and worries that draining Gelfling will cause it to spread faster.

But the Emperor is a global decaying denier and tells Scientist to tell him what he wants to hear.

Or he’ll kill his pet lab animals. Which the Scientist actually seems to like. I mean the animals, not the choking of them.

Scientist: “Fifty Gelfling, every trine!” I’m split between thinking ‘wow thats awful’ and ‘wow thats sustainable’

Chamberlain is feeling sad because Emperor doesn’t love him most anymore so he’s blowing an ominous horn.

Oh, another new Skeksis! SkekMal, the Hunter!

And all the other Skeksis are like ‘aw fuck not that guy’

Its interesting to think that from how much all the Skeksis seem to despise each other, thats actually them getting along and liking each other, and there are other Skeksis that they just don’t like at all.

WOW SKEKMAL LOOKS SPOOKY

THE GROUND IS ANGRY

THE SKY IS ANGRY!

WHY IS EVERYTHING ANGRY

Oh theres Aughra, of course she’s angry. She’s angry or peeved or irritated or disgruntled.

Aughra: “I will go no further!” -many plot arrows- “... I will go a bit further.”

I hadn’t gotten a good view yet but Aughra has a cool cape.

Oh hey, a new UrRu! This day brings a bounty. He’s the Archer who has been shooting arrows adjacent to Aughra.

Archer: “Thra still sings”

Aughra: “Then why don’t I hear it?”

Archer: “Because you turned your eye away from Thra and towards the stars.”

Hearing that from the Skeksis is just audacious but hearing it from an UrRu makes it hurt.

Aughra: “I trusted the Skeksis to look after Thra! I took their word!”

Archer: “And their gifts”

GET DUNKED ONNNNNN i guess.

Having four arms must help with archery. But apparently having arthritis in all of those arms doesn’t.

Archer shoots arrow straight up into the air and has it land right at her feet. And vanishes while she’s watching it go.

Aughra: “You could have just said this! Clearly, succinctly! Without all the walking!”

Archer is the troll UrRu

Ohhh, I bet Archer and Hunter are counterparts. BECAUSE THEY’RE BOTH BATMAN

Archer does the vanishing when he feels the conversation is ended part and Hunter appears out of nowhere to give Chamberlain a frighten.

Hunter: “What is the prey?”

Chamberlain: “A Gelfling”

Hunter: “Nope. Bye.”

But Chamberlain talks him into it anyway because talking people into things is what Chamberlain does.

Although first he tries to make the Hunter feel sorry for his, the Chamberlain’s, reverse in fortunes by whining that the General hurt his hand but the Hunter just. Doesn’t. Care. About castle politics. He wouldn’t be out in the night being batman if he did.

But Chamberlain does manage to somehow convince him that Rian is worthy prey.

Now the General is charge of Gurjin’s interrogation and he immediately cattle prods him several times and straps him into the soul suck machine. Welp.

Gurjin, you’re wonderfully defiant and snarky.

General: “I will ask you once again, WHERE IS THE FUGITIVE RIAN?”

Gurjin, having just been partially soul sucked: “Have you checked the Great Smerth? It’s particularly lovely in spring.”

The Emperor rolls in and its like dad came home and caught the boys misbehaving.

Scientist: “I told him not to do it!”

General: “I… I was just introducing myself to the Gelfling!”

Emperor: =__=

OH MY GOD BREA HAS JUST BEEN TRYING TO BRUTE FORCE THE PUZZLE THIS ENTIRE TIME

She’s just been trying different combinations and writing down what doesn’t work.

Brea: “‘Thra’s true balance will be found when the natural order is sound’… but there is no natural order because no clan is above any of the others! It isn’t a puzzle! It’s a lie!”

Good job overcoming your prejudices, Brea!

Also, apparently refusing to rank the clans was the correct answer. This puzzle room is smart.

Hey what. Hey um what. There’s this stone dinosaur now what.

Its kind of cute.

YODA????

IS THAT YODA???

So the rock creature is named Lore and it has like… rock grooved cylinders and a rock phonograph pick and like a recorded Yoda voice that drops exposition

Yoda: “Lore has imprinted on you. He is now your guardian and will protect you on your journey to the Circle of the SUns. There you will find the key to free Gelfing from Skeksis power forever.”

Oh.

Wait, who put this here? If the All-Maudra is NOW deeply in the Skeksis’ pockets then who and when put a secret room under her throne? And who knew enough to put a rock puppy in a secret room with a prerecorded message that the Skeksis were up to nooooo good. If someone knew all along that the Skeksis were jerks, why bury a message about it instead of doing something?

And then Seladon shows up and is like “THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE”

I’m not sure what the Gelfling guards were going to do to a rock monster with little spears anyway.

And now Rian has wandered into the Podling village. Hopefully he manages to be less racist than everyone else (except Deet) that interacts with them.

Wait, is that Rian? Then who is the other hooded gelfling and why are there ominous scare strings?

Podlings just love to party. They’re the Michelangelo of Thra’s races.

-Podling picks up entire keg and sprays it into another Podling’s mouth-

Rian gets a free drink because an old lady Podling wants to flirt at him across the room.

But his heart is too tender after losing the love of his life and I’m sure he won’t have room for a new love anytime soon.

Gurjin’s sister is hardcore. Shows up and puts Rian at knifepoint to ransom him off to get Gurjin back.

Oh and Cool Sister Tavra also shows up to also try to capture Rian for murdering a member of the Vapra (which he didn’t).

Oh Cool Sister Tavra, why’d you have to be racist at the Drunchens?

Rian: “Will someone just please fucking dreamfast with me so we can resolve this damn plot?”

Entirely new character Kylan: “Yeah I’m game” “The Skeksis may rule the land, but they do not rule my heart.”

Damn, entirely new character Kylan, you’re dope.

Tavra also decides that if entirely new character Kylan is going to do it, then she’s going to do it too.

And Gurjin’s sister gets peer pressured into doing it too.

FINALLY dreamfasting does what it was designed to do and shortcut past doubt and suspicion so we can get on with it.

Oh hey, Rian’s dad wanders in (geez Rian is bad at hiding if everyone found him at the same time) and also gets in on this dreamfast.

It feels a little weirder though because he gets in when it was already ongoing and its like weird because everyone else consented to the dreamfast and he just invited himself in.

But hey it lets Rian make up with his dad so, sure.

Dreamfasting also apparently can create- oh dreametching. Yeah they did mention that could happen.

So now Rian, entirely new character Kylan, and Dadrian are going to the All-Maudra to get her to rally the Gelflings against the Skeksis.

And Gurjin’s sister Naia and Tavra are going to the castle to free Gurjin.

I caaaaan’t help but feeeeeel that if Tavra went with Rian’s group they’d be able to convince the All-Maudra more easily but surrrrrrrrrre do whateverrrrrr

Unless you get captured and killed, Tavra and Naia. I’d be disgruntled at that.

Its kind of weird you have this group of plucky youths and also Rian’s dad who is like the wizened old man compared to them.

Wait, where IS Kylan? Did he go with the castle group after all?

Wait, shouldn’t Rian dad go on the castle mission since he’s the boss guard? And would make it easier for them to-

Oh, I see. He has to be killed by the Hunter to show how serious the situation is.

Sorry, RIan’s dad. You’re the sacrificial lamb.

I mean, it hasn’t happened yet, but I bet it will-

OH HI DEET!

Deet and Rian just barely cross each other’s paths again. Its a small world after all.

Rian: “Do you remember [father-son bonding activity]?”

Rian Dad: “Ahhh I see how that memory we both share would be useful here.”

HOLY SHIT the Hunter can book. All the other Skeksis are like lumbering around and feeling old and he’s jumping in trees. Maybe fresh air IS good for you.

And he’s a puppet or a costume or a costume puppet so holy shit.

Rian tries to sword fight the Hunter but like…. The weight advantage is very much the Hunter’s. He’s just easily pushing the Gelfling around

HOLY SHIT HIS TWO EXTRA ARMS AREN'T ATROPHIED HE’S SKEKSIS GENERAL GRIEVOUS

Hunter: “You have heart…. I’ll take that too.”

Oh no I was wrong! Rian Dad wasn’t the sacrificial lamb! He was the heroic sacrifice!

He tackled the Hunter into a pit of angry earth and the Hunter seems pretty okay with that as long as he takes someone with him. What an enigmatic guy.

Oh. never mind. Hunter is still alive. He’s too angry and spry for the ground to eat.

I was about to say what a shame it was to introduce the guy and immediately get him eaten by the ground.

And also Riandad’s sacrifice was pointless because the Hunter immediately captures Rian and absconds with him.

Deet and Hup must be very confused coming into this plot branch with no context.

#dark crystal #dark crystal age of resistance #episode 4 #liveblog

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masterweaverx · 6 years ago

Text

The Brunswick Blooper Reel

“I’m not useless!” Maria snapped, waving off Oscar as she turned around. “I’m just a little hard of hearing. And blind without my eyes. And I have a chronic case of arthritis.”

Oscar blinked, staring at her. As she went on, though, a disbelieving grin formed on his face.

“In fact, it might be osteoporosis. And don’t get me started on the menopause! Actually,” Maria mused thoughtfully, “I might have Alzheimer's too, come to think of it, I don’t remember. Who are all you people again?”

By this point Oscar was hiding his laughter behind a glove. The others, just off screen, were not so discrete.

“That bastard!” Yang stepped forward angrily, pointing a demanding finger. “Bring him back!”

“I can’t!” Oscar cried furtively. “It’s not like before, it’s like he’s locked himself deep inside his head! My head? Oh, I hate this!”

“Actually I just went down to the bakery,” Ozpin explained, walking onto the scene with a wide grin. “Apology cookies anyone?”

A series of groans (and scattered laughter) went up, the annoyed director calling for a cut. Ruby eyed the bag in his hand. “You did get strawberry scones, right?”

“Like I would forget them.”

“Sweet!”

The door to the Brunswick farms was locked shut. And then--

*THWACK*

“Ow! F--sh--raaaaarg...”

“Oh wow,” came Ruby’s voice, “that’s one tough door. We did unlock it for this shot, right?”

“I’d be a little more worried about him,” Blake replied. “You alright there?”

Qrow groaned. “Medic....”

“What do you think?” Blake asked seriously.

Ruby solemnly shook her head. “I don’t know. Something doesn’t feel right--”

A shriek came from upstairs--

“Weiss!”

--followed by a loud “GODDAMNIT!” and a laughing “Oh my god, really?”

Blake blinked. “That’s... not in the script--”

Weiss came storming down the stairs, blushing furiously. “Excuse me, I need to go scrub my eyes.”

“I’m sorry!” called a voice from upstairs.

Yang was chuckling as she descended. “Well, I mean, the bed is supposed to have dead people in it anyway--”

Ruby covered her face with her hands, trying to hide her disbelieving grin as Blake groaned. “Again?! Those two...”

“Welp,” Maria quipped, “I guess shooting is done for today.”

“Is this going in the blooper reel?” Blake asked plaintively.

Yang smirked. “Hell yes!”

Ruby descended into embarrassed giggling.

“Tell you what. You keep that fire going, and I’ll find us a story to read.”

Oscar smiled faintly as Maria hobbled over to the bookshelves.

“Oh look! The kama sutra!”

Baffled laughter escaped the boy’s mouth. “Wh--what? Seriously?”

“It’s a good read,” Maria pointed out.

“No, no no, nooooo.” Oscar held up his hands. “Waaaay too young for that!”

“Huh,” Yang mused, “the workshop is getting really good with these puppets.” She poked one of the inert Apathy experimentally. “I mean, these have got to be the creepiest ones yet.”

“Oh yeah,” Blake agreed. “And have you read the script? These things are just terrifying, really.”

Yang turned to her with a nod. “Yeah, I’m glad these aren’t real. I mean, zombie grimm are bad enough, but the whole will-draining thing--”

Bony fingers brushed her shoulder. “BRAAAAAAAINSSSSS...”

Yang spun around, fists at the ready. “GAH WHAT THE--”

“BRAAAAAAAAAAINSSSS!” Ruby repeated, waving the Apathy’s arms around with a huge grin.

Yang lowered her fists with an angry laugh. “Damn it, leave that kind of trolling in Chibi!”

"Hey, I think I found something,” Yang said. She smiled as she looked down at the trailer, her eyes drifting up to the window--and then she let out a horrified gasp.

One which quickly descended into helpless giggles. “Turn, heehee, turn the camera!”

The camera turned to the window. Through it, in the snow, Adam Taurus could be seen... dressed as a belly-dancer and performing actually quite well.

Yang threw the window open. “Damn it, you’re playing a psychopath! You’ve got to stop doing things like this!” She turned to the camera, helplessly gesturing at the man with a grin. “This guy. This guy!”

Blake sighed. “Adam... Adam always knew how to get into--”

“Mrrrw...”

“--how to get into people’s heads, and--”

“Mrrrrooooooow!”

Yang snorted.

Blake glared at her. “Do you think this is funny?”

“I didn’t say that!” Yang protested, desperately trying to hide her amusement.

Blake rolled her eyes, turning to the shelves and spotting the black cat with yet another dead bird at his paws. “I already told you: I am not interested!”

Yang couldn’t hold it back anymore, bursting out in peals of laughter.

With a sigh, Blake turned to the camera. “The glamor of acting, people.”

“Mrrrooooooooow?”

She gestured at the persistent feline. “Can we get my stalker off the set?!”

Yang’s laughter redoubled as she collapsed out of the shot. Blake glowered down, her leg moving slightly and producing a small thnk sound.

“Ow! Okay, hahaha, fair, but, hee, but still, hahahahahaha!”

With one final long-suffering look to the camera, Blake left the shot.

"Ruby, are we... are we really still going to Atlas?”

Ruby turned, a confused horror subtly creeping into her expression. “Weiss, what are you saying?”

“It’s just--”

“~Oooooh let’s go digital! Yeah let’s go--~”

Ruby fumbled with her scroll for a bit, before pressing the answer button. “Uh, hey there!

“Salutations! I just found this convenience store nearby, do you want me to pick something up for you?”

“Oh, that sounds great, um, definitely some trail mix--no beans or seafood--actually, would it be too much of me to ask you to get some subs or something for everyone on the way down?”

“Not at all! Are there any specific orders you would like?”

“I still don’t like mayonnaise,” Weiss interjected.

There was a moment of silence.

“Did I call you in the middle of a shot again?”

“Yeeeeah.” Ruby chuckled. “Sorry--”

“No no no, it’s my fault entirely. I’ll get the food, and I’ll be down in a bit, alright?”

“Alright. Love you!”

“Love you too! See you soon!” The scroll clicked off.

Ruby shook her head. Then she caught sight of Weiss’s look. “What?”

“I’m happy for you,” Weiss assured her with a grin.

Ruby glanced away. “Mmmrngh...” She couldn’t help the corner of her lips twitching upward.

Ruby picked up the golden bottle. Her face contorted with quiet rage, and she flung it away.

It bounced against the wall and started rolling across the ground.

After a moment, Ruby sighed. “It didn’t shatter, did it.”

Four of the Apathy strode on stage, wearing hats and wielding canes as team RWBY expertly puppeted them through a dance routine.

“~Spooky scary skeletons send shivers down your spine, Shrieking skulls will shock your soul and seal your doom tonight! Spooky scary skeletons speak with such a screech, You'll shake and shudder in surprise when you hear these zombies shriek!...~”

“We’re all tired,” Oscar pointed out wearily.

“Maybe if we’re all so exhausted we should eat?” Blake suggested.

“Yeah,” Oscar agreed. “A nice bowl of cereal.”

“Pancakes,” Blake added. “Two plates.”

“Crispy bacon, prepared juuuust right.”

“Eggs over easy, on top of french bread.”

“Cinnamon toast.”

“What?”

“It’s cinnamon toast,” Oscar said seriously. “French bread is the baguette.”

“Well, you can use a baguette to make cinnamon toast, right?”

“I mean, sure, but then where does the madness end? Cereal in orange juice? Syrup-slathered ham? Breakfast burritos slathered in chocolate?”

“Actually,” Ruby interjected, “that last one sounds pretty good.”

“I once had a deep-fried stack of pancakes,” Weiss mused. “Not actually that bad.”

“I subscribe to the ‘take five cans of anything, dump in some noodles, and boil it all’ philosophy of cooking,” Yang added.

“You’d be surprised what kind of crazy combinations people can come up with,” Maria added. “Ever hear of muffin pizza?”

Oscar looked at them all in horror. “My god... you’re all insane.”

"Look, we can just drop it in the well,” Yang suggested. “Sure, the Grimm might find it, but it would take time. A year... ten... it may not even happen in our lifeline.”

There was a moment where everyone processed that.

“...Damn it.” Yang facepalmed. “I didn’t even mean to say that!”

“Yarr maties,” Blake growled, “batten down tha hatches, there be a storm a-comin’!”

Weiss snorted. “See, my mind went to ‘Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.’”

Ruby turned to the camera with the biggest of grins. “I’ll take Grimm Studies for three hundred, please!”

“Alright, alright!” Yang rolled her eyes. “Come on, let me give this another take.”

Ruby picked up the golden bottle. Her face contorted with quiet rage, and she flung it away.

It bounced against the wall, landing on its base and waggling to a stop.

Ruby glanced over her shoulder, then turned to the camera with an expression of utter deadpan.

Ruby dropped into the well, shortly after followed by her teammates. She took her scroll and raised it warily... and then moved her thumb with a mischievous smirk.

“~Cause this is THRILLEEEEEER! THRILLER NIGHT! And noone’s gonna save ya from the beast about to strike--~”

Ruby was already dancing and, after an amused glance, the other three joined in. Then Maria moonwalked into the scene with a huge grin.

“Having fun without me, dearies?”

“Woo!” Yang shouted. “Rock it granny!”

She did indeed proceed to rock it.

Maria clutched at the stairs, looking up desperately. “An exit!”

Weiss rushed past her--and ended up knocking her over with a loud THWUMP! She turned around, caught sight of the old woman, and covered her mouth with her hands.

“Oh my gosh, I--I am so sorry!” She walked back down slowly. “Are you alright?”

“...Medic...”

Ruby reached out desperately to her teammate, collapsed in front of the oncoming horde. “Blake...”

Blake looked at her, eyes... glittering with mischief, as she put a hand on her hip and adopted a catlike smirk. “Draw me like one of your french girls.”

Instantly everyone cracked up, one of the Apathy even clapping sarcastically.

“Oh come on, you were all thinking it!”

Ruby picked up the golden bottle. Her face contorted with quiet rage, and she flung it away.

It bounced against the wall and--

"OW! Ow ow ow, damn it!”

Qrow blinked, turning to her. “What? What just happened?”

“The bottle bounced against the wall and hit her head,” Oscar helpfully provided from off-screen.

“The hell? Are these things made of rubber or something?” Qrow gave Ruby a concerned look. “Kid, you okay?”

“I think I’m bleeding,” Ruby reported in amused pain. “Ow. Medic?”

Ruby glared angrily, her teeth clenched as she peered at her foes.

“Aaaaaand cut!”

She turned to the camera with a bright smile. “Now see, that’s going to look a lot more impressive once they edit the silver eye stuff in in post.”

The camera focused on the metal cellar doors, zooming in dramatically on the chain--

--which jerked briefly.

“OW! Damn it, what the hell is that chain made of, adamantium?”

“Uh,” came Blake’s voice, “you doing alright there?”

“It’s an easy shot, they said. Punch open the door, they said! Damn it, I think my hand’s dead.”

“So...” Ruby mused. “Do you need a medic, or a technician?”

“My other fist is still working fine, missy.”

"We need to go!” Ruby cried.

“Not yet,” Weiss decreed, grabbing a bottle off the shelf. She threw it overhand at the cellar...

...and it bounced off the head of an Apathy, landing cork-first on the ground without spilling a drop.

“...What the hell?!”

“I know, right?!”

"They’re called the Apathy,” Maria explained morosely. “They’re not strong, or ferocious, or cunning. They just drain your will--”

The entire trailer suddenly jerked to a stop. A moment later, Bumblebee rolled behind it, engine cutting off.

“You all alright?” Yang asked.

“Yeah,” Ruby sighed. “We’re just going to have to hook this up and start this shot over.”

"Isn’t it obvious, girl?” Maria turned a sad smile on Ruby. “I have silver eyes.”

There was a moment where they all processed that.

“Um...” Ruby held up a finger. “Don’t you mean ‘had?’“

“Oh, I still have them,” Maria replied brightly, “they’re in my pocket here, let me show you!”

Everyone else broke out giggling, Ruby feebly protesting with a wave. “No, ew, gross! I believe you!”

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alyjojo · 3 years ago

Text

20 memories & isms I love about you.

1. He sent me flowers at work. Twice 🥰

2. He left work to help me fix my tire, outside my ex’s house. Never drove on a highway before that day. (no I shouldn’t have dated the guy, but that particular Gemini is the asc degree of our composite chart, he’s the reason we ever met at all, and hubby is the reason we broke up so...lesson learned)

3. He made me eat his mom’s food. Not only that but excitedly. He’d be like “mom is making hot spaghetti and you’re gonna come over and have some”...I’d say no thx 20 times but he wasn’t hearing it. Hot spaghetti day. I felt weird having someone’s mom cook for me. She probably felt weird too tbh, but he was so over the top happy about mom, food, and me, that it didn’t seem to matter and worked out fine 😆

4. He’s so forward, and bold as hell. I’m irritatingly shy and very guarded. Literally the only way he got me was because he’d act before I could really even think about it or think myself out of it. Winners mind.

5. He moved me into his moms house. I was not ok. Not not not. My pride is...well it exists, and burns like fire whenever help is given. I will never ask in all my life and idc, feels better that way. Will gladly die first. My rotors were broken though (I could write a book just about car problems fr), I needed two and it was gonna take awhile. I’d be in the city and he’d be way out there. He’s like nah. You stay. He insisted...and I stayed. Staying was not a me thing, he changed that.

6. He gave me a baby. After all of the years I didn’t have periods, needed pills to have a normal body, all of the times I talked myself out of that sort of life altogether because I clearly didn’t have the guy (ex was not a kid guy) or the working body parts to even do that, must not be for me. First time in our new apartment, boom baby.

7. First time in our slightly bigger and nicer apartment, boom baby 2. We started actually using protection after she was born. Clearly we can.

8. He worked stupidly long hours and put up with so many people that just had no fn clue, it put a strain on everything, most of all him. When he got the offer for Indy, I pushed it. And pushed it. And pushed. May as well have pushed him right out the door, we were going, because those people suck and you’ll never get the chance to be seen while you’re doing that glorified delivery guy’s job for him. We’re going. So, we did, and he got me out of this damn state. At least once.

9. He loved getting lost with me, and it was my favorite thing. Indiana is a beautiful state and I encourage anyone to get lost there, on purpose.

10. I forgot work. He caused some serious change. Everyone else lost their job, including hubby’s favorite person ever, Jonathan. Today he’s the sole survivor of a mom and pop shop, and I’m so unbelievably proud of him. The best part though, is two of the guys from work used to come see me at my new work all the time, with all their bar bitches 😆 They were my favorite people, I was always so excited to see them. Hubby tried to get them back on, and did for one of them. And when the bigger boss needed a new smaller boss bc hubby was leaving the state, hubby fought like hell for Jonathan. Like Highlander, there can only be one *sksksksksksk* They looked at a couple and hubs was like no only Jon knows the ways of the force. They hired him back, Jon has sent him some of the sweetest thank you messages...it changed his life, and hubs still loves him very much. It’s adorable.

11. Screamy baby Shmoo, she was a screamy baby, and so very beautiful. Baby Bam was like a dream, she was the perfect baby in every way. My screamy baby Shmoo was also a perfect baby, with a pitch that could break glass and sometimes she just wanted to practice for hours. Usually I got her to bed with mama snuggles & milk, singing Alison Krauss and rocking. Sometimes though, on the roughest nights, it’d be over an hour before I’d open the door with screamy baby still in a fit, and he’d take her. He’s so warm and calm, he’d win every single time, and I’d be like...zzzzz tysm ily tyty zzzz....

12. His jokes. He’s not funny (yes he is don’t tell him). He thinks he’s funny. He jokes all day every day about everything always. The girls know when dad says something to be skeptical bc he said they gotta go outside and till the land with tiny shovels, and when I roll my eyes they know he’s full of it. What’s funnier, his mom was the kind of person that took things literally always. Every time him and his goofy dad were being sarcastic, I’d have to tell her that because they’d have her believing crazy stuff. My kids share a lot of her isms, that’s one. My son absolutely does not joke, he is quite literal (so far), and I always have to scold hubby or tell lil guy nooooo he’s kidding. I don’t talk about his silliness nearly enough and I should, that’s him ❤️

13. His relationship with his mom. His mom was always on the...I wouldn’t say weaker side, but older, regular pain, on disability. He was her BABY. Her eyes lit up like Christmas when he entered the room. She loves him so so much. His sister... You know the kind, or...just imagine, probably close. He hated it. He got his job pretty young and just kept it. Always had money, always offered to help his mom, always was like IM FINE MOM. She just wanted to do for him, and he’s always been the kind of guy that wants to do for himself. And she was so funny, she’d slip $20 into the diaper bag and tell me “don’t tell him”, putting it on me. So we’d get in the car. And I’d be like there’s $20 in the diaper bag, knowing he’s gonna be pissed if he finds it (she needs it). And he’d get it, run into the house, set it on her table, and run out the door while she ran after him hollering protests 😆 Lots of other stories too. I miss her so much, I can’t even imagine how much he must.

14. His relationship with his sister, and other whirlwind people. He’s like a rock. I’ve spent lots of time with his sister, but not at once. The one day I did, I came home and my brain was so full of her bazillion ideas and impulsive let’s do this and just one thing, opposite thing, different subject, back to the subject, hey let’s do this, omg I have an idea. I love her to death but I had to sit and just...dump my brain. Ask myself for my own input bc I’d lost wtf...what were we doing again?!? Him though? Doesn’t miss a beat. No...no...no...I’ll think about it...no...no..change subject. No issue saying no. Back then I was like thank god, girl would have me on a cruise to Aruba tomorrow with costume jewelry and black face before I could even think to protest. Not him.

15. Making up. The difference between Taurus moon and Sag moon is that Taurus moon stays mad for the rest of their lives (hello...) and Sag moon wakes up in the morning like nothing happened in the history of ever. This was something that irritated me THE MOST. Don’t make me laugh, I’m pissed at you. Over the years, it became the only way we’d talk at all sometimes. Is certainly the only reason we made up, countless times. He never stopped trying to make me smile, even if I wanted nothing to do with it.

16. Acts of Service. Is not mine, which is either words time or touch and I really can’t decide which. All. He speaks a whole other language. He will let me nap, or take the kids somewhere, he will spontaneously clean or go grocery shopping, walk the dog, mow the lawn, hang out at the birthday party. It didn’t start right away, more and more as he learned my isms. He’ll make me coffee as I’m coming down the stairs. I rarely have to ever ask for any practical thing. He knows my orders for anything, recently there’s been twice that he literally read my mind before I spoke. I try to do the same for him as much as I can, because I know that’s his language and I really appreciate him.

17. Bedroom games. The man knows my body like a map, no, an Excel spreadsheet 😭, and how to get every reaction he’s looking for. He is the only man to ever satisfy my insatiable ass. He made me a whole new person in that regard. He says the same about me. Never an issue there. It’s this far down the list cuz it’s not the most important, but it’s pretty important too so there that is.

18. We share the same goals. We judge the same way, like why did they wrap this like that it looks sketchy. We parent the same. We decide the same. We critically think and weigh ideas the same. We walk the same line in the same direction. If anything he’s too negative sometimes, but that’s his own personal thing. Can’t be full of Capricorn and not lean more toward pessimism (not “realism”) sometimes I think. If it’s worth it, I’ll try to coax him to middle ground. Sometimes it’s a battle, but only if I’m really sure. Usually, he’s right, so I just let him lead.

19. When I was pregnant with my son. Initially. It was hell. His car was trashed, mine was broken and thousands of dollars to fix (this particular car in this particular year has this and what a coincidence it was particularly my problem...cars, I’m telling ya). I was two feet out the door with his shit, but his sister’s issues led to my heart. Because her kids. I love them very much, of course they can stay here and not with some strange person hell no. I cannot describe how angry I was at him. HE strapped backpacks onto his back and walked to the nearest store. Hauled so much crap in a huge backpack and just his arms. Over the course of two months. He quit drinking. He went above and beyond to do get offer or provide anything I could even imagine. More romantic then I think I’d ever seen him before. At least...it had been some time anyway. Of course...he was lying to me. The whole time. To what extent idk. Regarding the work shit, idk. Thus the question and the dream and the crazy and the...crazy 😞 Wanted to piss me off boy he got that tenfold. His actions during this time period are 💯 why I stayed. He was clearly trying like hell to prove to me he could try, and it’s more than anyone I’ve ever known has even bothered to “bother” with. I was impressed, and proud. Respect counts for a lot more than love sometimes, and at the time I respected him.

20. He’s an amazing father. There are so many stories I couldn’t possibly write them all. Our son though, he chose daddy, right from the start. Nothing like our daughters, nor any kid I’d known. He’d scream, FOR his dad. He’d only sleep on his shoulder. Hubby held this baby for hours on end. If he didn’t baby would demand it, but it was very natural to them both. Baby wanted a bottle, and hubby to give it to him. It blew my mind. Hubby got his little teammate and together they’ve changed my life and perspective in ways I couldn’t have ever imagined.

I’ve spent so long sporadically venting on here that I don’t think I’ve ever posted the sweet things. So many great memories and daily...everything...are missing, so many years and little moments. That would take forever. Its always been my frustrations, which was the purpose. This is my heart. No matter what happens, all of these things will always be true.

#I love him with all my heart

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ziggory · 7 years ago

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Riverdale Liveblog 2x10 - The Blackboard Jungle

It’s good to be back! And I’ve accrued quite a lot of followers over the hiatus! To those of you not in the know, as a West Coast viewer I just do all my liveblog observations in one big dump. So this will be a long post with no cuts.

ACHIE AND HIS MUSIC REUNITED. Wow, I can’t believe I missed this plotline.

I wish I spotted what book Kevin was reading.

Does Lovecraftian mean that Jughead hates the Welsh

Fangs and Sweet Pea are a fun duo. I just need more happy friendships on this show

So if the Lodges are funding the re-election campaign, I think that strikes out the possibility of either Hiram or Hermoine running against her

Polly in a cult is the least surprising thing. But I also understand her not wanting to call her mom. I don’t think it’s that “cruel and selfish and vindictive” And LMAO, Betty, nooooo don’t keep that weird creepy cursed nightlight!

Is this guy really with the FBI? They just...go around recruiting 16-year-olds? Sure, whatever. Oh my god at Archie asking if it’s legal for the dude to approach him!

I’m glad that FP still has his Pop’s job. It helps to have a legit W-2 for tax season since I doubt the Serpents have 1099s on hand

Well now I ship Sweet Pea/Reggie. Antagonistic ships just do it for me

“Pomp and circumstance”, lmao, thank you Weatherbee

I thought Cheryl would’ve used the kiss as blackmail for some juicier bidding. Not making Archie side against the Serpents, lol

Veronica introducing herself to Toni is everything as well as Toni seeming halfway charmed. Josie’s “formerly of the Pussycats” broke me, but it’s cute she intro’d Kevin. And uh, excuse me while I scream forever about Fangs being Joaquin’s friend!! AND THAT JOAQUIN TALKED ABOUT KEVIN A LOT!! MY HEART! Also the fact that they were all just chilling in the lounge together was actually quite nice

Weatherbee being angry over shit is hilarious to me, but you’d think shit like graffiti would already be against school rules

Ooo, I like this shot so that I can compare Kevin’s height to Sweet Pea

Awww, it’s nice to hear Toni and Sweet Pea’s perspective about getting to go to a school that isn’t one match away from being a tire fire

Archie borrowing one of Jason’s blazers is reminding me of that replacement goldfish prompt on the kinkmeme

I wonder how many turtlenecks Sweet Pea owns. And lmao at “honor and history”. Yes, screaming rules at each other in a bar, playing chicken with a snake, a gauntlet of pain, and underage stripping.

Hart looks like Dave Franco

I’m sure if I can try hard enough I can tie the universes of Mortal Kombat and Riverdale together. Actually, Shang Tsun was on Sabrina the Teenage Witch so there ya go!

So uhhh, actually snakes don’t hibernate. They just become less active. But I love this continuing trend of getting snake facts wrong

I’m very much into this Archie/Nick scene. Intimidation is my kink. YESSSSS, BEAT HIS ASS!

Uniforms suck ass. I think they were doing fine dressing on their own, but I guess Jughead screwed that up for them. I was half hoping that Fangs was off making out with Kevin already, lol

Yes, please throw away that creepy ass nightlight. Or take pics and let it go viral on cursed images

I’m surprised that Archie’s confessing! That’s for the best though

They’re having a gaming group, and Kevin’s not there??? FUCK OFF! I DEMAND HE ATTEMPT TO JOIN THIS GROUP IN A FUTURE EPISODE.

Honestly, I headcanon that Clifford had a micropenis and that the twins were a miracle so this is probably the best sex Penelope’s ever had

I hadn’t realized that Veronica had only previously told Cheryl and Kevin.

“I want that in writing” Hey! Is that some of Mary’s coming through? Even though she was also a questionable lawyer

NOOOOOO! I don’t care how shit Svenson as the Hood was as a reveal. I just want that shit to be done!

I would’ve been more surprised if Chic hadn’t been creepy

#Riverdale #Riverdale Liveblog #long post

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wondersoftheteenagemind · 5 years ago

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B❤

Brandon is the name of the first and - so far - only boy I've ever loved. And what a fucking whirlwind its been.

So where to start?

I guess well start right from the beginning in August 2016. This is when we first met. At first we were friends and thats all we could be cos he was my cousins best friend. He was in the year above me in school but thankfully didn't go to my school. We were friends for a year and that was when everything changed. At a BBQ in August 2017 was when I went into the garage just to get a can of Coke. Thats all. But nooooo. He had other ideas, not that I was angry about it though. I got my coke and when I turned around there he was, stood right in front of me blocking my way. Then he kissed me. Honestly, someone should make a movie about this. Its like every shitty rom com there is. Great. My realtionship was a shitty rom com. Anyway, he kissed me and that is why I blame him for everything that has happened😂.

We had to keep it a secret cos it wouldn't have gone down well with anyone. It was perfect. I had never been happier. Just bear in mind, I'm 13 at the time and he was my first proper boyfriend. Those 6 months were bliss, until they weren't. I was hanging out with my cousin one day and he said “everyones been talking about how much they hate Brandon and Katie together”. What the fuck? So I asked him what he meant by together and he was surprised that Brandon hadn't told me seeing as we were ‘friends’. I was surprised all right. We were supposed to meet each other the next day so I did. When he got there I put on a brave face, called him all the names under the sun and dumped him.

That shit hurted. A lot.

I was out with my cousin the next month a d saw the girl he cheated on me with. Long story short: she made a snide comment, I slapped her, she fell on the floor, my cousin found out everything and so did my whole family. We love that.

Now, cue the stupid me sith absolutely no self control for the next year or so.

That summer I started talking to him again and we got back together. A month in he got really distant so I ended it. Again.

Then we started speaking again in October and got back together. It was Good. We were both happy. In November my grandad died. The week before his funeral in December I had a long hard think about everything. I loved Brandon but I wasn't in love with him and he was in love with me. It wasn't fair on either of us. So we had a difficult conversation and decided it was best for us to end it. There was a lot of tests that day.

Fast forward to March this year. We started speaking again but just as friends this time. We started hanging out again but we agreed just as friends. Near the end of June he got weird and possessive and wante to get back together and was angry I was too busy to come and see him so I snapped and shouted at him and then everything went quiet. It turns out later that day he met up with Katie and slept with her. Again, it was my cousin who told me that. That made me angry,I won't lie. We weren't together so I didn't really have any right to be angry but I was. He could've slept with anyone but it haright arind gatd to be her. That took a while for me to get over, but I never told him that. I told him everything was fine but I just needed a little but of space to think.

I got over it and in October I realised I missed him. So I messaged him asking if we could meet up. It was no surprise that he said yes. So the day after we met up at his house. Now ill be honest, we had a little bit of a kiss... But then we lay there on his bed in silence. Them he said “this isn't going to work is it?”. He was right and I hated that. He was right, it would've never have worked again, we were too broken. Every time we get together we hurt each other without even meaning to which is probably worse. Every time we break up we’re a bit more broken. I couldn't have gone through it again.

So.

Its very unlikely that you will read this but on the off chance that you do:

Brandon, I fell in love with you in December 2017. I still care about you a lot and I wish you all the best and thank you for everything. And don't be too angry that I wrote this.

#love longstory

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colorfullyminded · 7 years ago

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Steven And Malachi

((Putting this under read more cause it might get long. A bunch of headcanons for Steven and Malachi (platonic and romantic) from Iceb0x’s comic (and ocs) Atonement Day.

I love these two so much.

((These can be seen as Platonic or Romantic, whichever, they’re subtley enough to be both))

((I Don’t know Why I love this Headcanon I have for them))

1. Before the rapture/Apocalypse, Steven and Malachi would hang out and after scouts meeting, they’d stop at the convenience store and get slushies (Steven’s blue and Malachi’s red). Then they’d sit on the stone wall at the public park, talking about anything, drinking their slushies. Anything from casual conversations to more heavier topics. That was their place to hang out, and this carried over until they were teenagers (until the apocalypse).

-Malachi hates slushies (Steven enjoys them), he always complains that they’re gross and he drinks them too fast, giving him massive brain freeze. But because Steven likes them, and Malachi enjoys these peaceful moments, he tolerates the slushed diabetes. And if he gets really annoyed, he just gives Steven the rest.

-Steven usually gets a slushy and a half every time.

2. One time, Steven joined Malachi at a group youth event (a meet and greet). They were surrounded by other kids, and parents (including Malachi’s father). Somehow, whether by accident, or intentional, Malachi managed to insult one of the girls he was chatting up and she threw her cup of punch in his face, staining his white dress shirt. Other kids started laughing, pointing, causing the adults to look over. When Malachi’s father saw him, the look on his face was one that meant Malachi was going to be severely punished for embarrassing him. Malachi was holding back tears at the look.

-Steven, who had been successfully flirting with a girl by the punch bowl, witnessing the scene, and noticing Malachi’s father expression, immediately turned to the girl, muttered an apology, and then insulted her so badly, that she dumped the whole punch bowl over his head. Everyone’s attention was averted from Malachi to Steven who was dripping from head to toe, glasses and shirt stained red.

-One of the other pastors told Malachi and Steven they could find spare clothes in another room and that they should get changed quickly. They ran off, and only once they were safe in the hall, did Malachi finally start smiling again. No, actually he was laughing, tears of mirth in his eyes as he teased Steven profusely. Steven rolled his eyes, calling him an asshole, but he was glad to see Malachi smiling again. Even if he couldn’t prevent Malachi’s father’s rage, he was hoping to take the other boy’s mind off it, for awhile.

-Somehow, though, due to Steven’s more embarrassing humiliation, Malachi’s father didn’t punish Malachi. Just a stern lecture, and telling Malachi he could never invite Steven to another youth group event. Both were more than okay with that compromise.

3. Steven would be very passive aggressive about Malachi replacing Steven as a friend, and putting his feelings of Abel over their own history. I like to believe that he’d be slightly jealous of Abel, how he’s known Malachi longer, but Malachi has never treated him with nearly the same kindness he gives Abel, a kid he barely met. He’d be like:

Steven: Oh, why don’t you sit next to Malachi, Abel, since you two are such good buddies now? (gets up and starts walking to the other side)

Malachi: Oh would you stop! Come back here Steven!

Steven: Nooooo, don’t let me stop you two love birds! Go ahead Abel, you’re Malachi’s best friend now.

Malachi: Oh my gosh!

Abel: (I’m uncomfortable)

-((I think Canonly, more likely though)) That Steven would still be passive aggressive, but only to Malachi, since Abel didn’t really do anything and it’s really not his fault that Malachi is a shitty friend. So he’d still be friendly to Abel, but just be all angry and sassy to Malachi ((who honestly deserves it a little for being so cruel to Steven’s feelings))

Steven: So should I just leave you two alone? Am I being a 3rd wheel?

Malachi: Why are you being so difficult? You’re such a toddler!

Steven: At least I’m not a terrible friend

Malachi: UGH!

4. During Christmas, during the times Malachi’s father doesn’t even show up or call, Steven goes over to Malachi’s house, with a present, homemade cookies and a bunch of movies. He spends the night with Malachi, eating cookies (and popcorn) while they binge Christmas movies (or just whatever movie marathon Malachi wants).

-If Malachi passes out on Steven’s shoulder, or even his lap halfway through, Steven doesn’t complain or try and move him. Tis the season for a little extra kindness.

5. Malachi’s dad hates Steven. It’s the only thing that he can agree with the man on: he hates him too. It’s mutual. It makes Steven angrier thinking that if Malachi’s dad could have been a little nicer, even just 20% nicer, maybe Malachi would have better confidence, better self esteem, and would be able to handle relationships (romantic or platonic) a lot better than he does.

-At least Malachi came to him when his father was being particularly shitty, and Steven much rather have that than Malachi close him off and deal with it alone (which Malachi has tried to do a few times). But Steven would like it far more if Malachi didn’t have to come to him for comfort, or space from his father, or, god forbid the really bad moments, when he had to help patch and clean up Malachi. Steven really, really hates Malachi’s dad. He doesn’t wish hell on people ever...but he thinks there’s a special place for Malachi’s father.

-He can tell when Malachi is trying to lie to him. Usually Malachi is meticulous about his texting, very professional, no grammar mistakes, no spelling mistakes, no emojis. Steven teases him for being a grandpa, but if Steven ever sees that Malachi’s texts have way more misspellings than typical auto-correct, or he tries to throws in a single emoji, Steven knows something is wrong. He’ll immediately text Malachi that he’s on his way, despite Malachi’s protest. Usually when he gets there, hugs and snack foods at the ready, Malachi is a lot more appreciative.

6. When they were very little, Steven helped Malachi make a lanyard since Malachi was struggling a lot and Steven was very good at making lanyards. He did most of the work, but Malachi finished the last part ((this would be when they were very young, so Malachi’s not a dick yet, he’s just not good at making lanyards)). When it was finished, he gave the completed lanyard to Steven, saying it was a present to thank him for helping him, and it was a symbol of their friendship. Steven said he would treasure it forever. The Lanyard is yellow and white and light blue.

-Malachi believes he lost it long ago. Honestly, it’s a vague memory, so he doesn’t even remember it that much anyway.

-Steven still has it. It’s tucked into his wallet. Sometimes looking at it reminds him that Malachi is more than just the person he is now.

-((I don’t know where the story is going to go, but if somehow, Steven ends up dying or gets killed off)) While searching through Steven’s backpack for supplies to keep moving on, he goes through his wallet, tipping it upside down and the lanyard falls out. He picks it up, at first confused why Steven had such a useless trinket. Then he remembers. And after he remembers... he doesn’t take seeing the lanyard well.

((These headcanons would be if they were in a universe where they were dating))

1. Steven and Malachi have such a old married couple relationship. They argue and bicker so much, constantly throwing insults so harsh, that often people wonder if they even like each other.

-When people ask if they even like the other, the two will simultaneously say, no hesitation “Not even a little!” This confuses people more, wondering why they’re dating if they can’t stand each other.

-But it’s obvious that they’re lying. Because, they can insult each other til the cows come home, but if someone (not closely related to them) insults one of them in the other’s presence, they best be ready for the tirade of insults their way.

Example:

Steven: Malachi’s a dick!

Someone: Hahaha yeah he is! God I wish brats like him would just drop dead. The world would be so much better without his preachy whining.

Steven: Oh, I’m sorry? Did I ask for your shitty opinion? No, I don’t believe I did, so shove it back up your ass where it belongs.

And

Malachi: Steven is the absolute worse. The worst underling a guy could ask for! I can’t stand him!

Someone: What did you expect from a nerdy, loser? He’s so annoying to be around.

Malachi: Actually, I did think of one good quality. I enjoy his company far more than yours. : )

-Another reason they insult each other, is because it’s their own secret way to show endearment. Because Malachi’s father would never have accepted their relationship (for many reasons), they had to find a way to be show affection without warning suspicion. Thus, they came up with their insult dialogue. Because whatever they said, would mean the opposite of what they meant. And to Malachi’s dad it would just seem like boys being boys (and because of their mutual dislike of each other, having Malachi insult Steven made his father a little proud, thinking that his son was getting the upper hand and that maybe one day they would stop being friends for good).

-It’s become second nature to them now. Even though they don’t have to be rude with each other anymore, they still do it around others, because they feel more comfortable that way. Only when they’re in private or can’t be overheard do they actually show genuine concern and worry ((like the scene in the rain of the comic)).

2. When they first tried kissing (or making out) Steven and Malachi both had braces. Their braces ended up getting stuck, and Malachi panicked, not wanting to get caught in this situation. He yanked so hard, he not only snapped the wiring off his front braces, but he pushed Steven with enough force that Steven’s braces managed to slice Malachi’s bottom lip open. Malachi started freaking out more, having a panic attack when he tried to think of what he was going to tell his father to even explain this.

Malachi: I can’t get caught! He’ll kill me Steven! Or he’ll send me away! Or he’ll never let me see you anymore! I’m scared! Shit, what do I do?

Steven, trying to calm him down, and not wanting those scenarios to happen either, especially Malachi getting hurt or punished at his expense (considering he somehow managed not to damage his own braces), said:

Steven: I have an idea, but you have to trust me.

Malachi: O-okay?

Steven: Punch me, as hard as you can!

Malachi: What! WHY? I’M NOT GOING TO PUNCH YOU! WHY WOULD YOU WANT THAT!

Steven: If we make it look like we got into a big fight, your dad might still be pissed, but he’ll be far less angry than finding out the truth. And if he knows it was me you got in a fight with, he might be even more lenient.

Malachi: I don’t want to lie...

Steven: So you wanna tell him we were kissing?

Malachi does more damage to his knuckles than he thinks he did to Steven’s nose.

-By the time he sees his dad, he looks like he’s been in a real fight. Black eye, split lip trying to heal, bruised knuckles. His dad demands to know what he was up to. Before Malachi can answer, there’s a knock at the door. It’s revealed to be Steven and his mother ((if she’s still alive)). Steven just looks as messed up as Malachi. Steven then had to apologize to Malachi and his father for instigating a fight with Malachi (he told his mom he started the fight, knowing full well she would make him come over and apologize). Malachi’s father just huffs, acknowledging the apology. Though Steven notices he looks a little surprised (and pleased) at Malachi for the first time in a long time. Steven feels much better, even though his face still hurts so bad.

-Malachi is really thankful too.

#atonement day #iceb0x #iceb0x's ocs #malachi #steven #these two #i freaking love these two #i know i have more #but this is already super long #and i can't think of any others right now #but i hope these are okay #iceb0x i'd love to know what you think

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theartificialdane · 7 years ago

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Galactica, part 248

In this Sutan can’t sleep, Jinkx shares her past, Courtney does her best, and christmas is right around the corner!

Thank you @samrull @veronicasanders and @toriibelledarling <3

“Ow!” Violet woke up, a sharp pain stabbing her in the ribs. She opened her eyes, and saw that Sutan was sitting next to her in bed, a pen from the bedside table in his hand. Violet had fully expected to see Frida, the little dog often sneaking into bed, but Frida was nowhere to be seen. “... Did you just stab me?” They had gone home right away, Sutan holding her close in the taxi as they kissed, a strange new desperation over him that had taken them straight to the bedroom, the delicious soreness in Violet’s bones a reminder.

“What were you thinking?”

“Wha-”

“Because I don’t understand. It doesn’t make any sense. Why you would just leave?”

Violet felt taken aback. She had never seen Sutan so angry before, so upset.

“I-”

“Do you know how worried I was? I looked like a fucking idiot, I felt like a fucking idiot Violet. Do you understand that? You left your phone! You’ve never done anything like this before, I- Fuck!” Sutan threw himself down on the bed, his arm over his eyes, and Violet felt stupid. Of course Sutan had worried. Of course he had.

“I’m sorry…”

“You’re not.” Sutan didn’t even look up, but Violet couldn’t help but smile, her sweet boyfriend slowly coming back to her. She could feel the embarrassment rise in him, and it was a little childish that he had woken her up in the middle of the night. But if she was honest, she deserved so much more.

“I am..” Violet laid down, a small breath of relief leaving her as Sutan allowed her to curl up. “I shouldn’t have left.. I just…” Violet bit her lip. “I saw someone I knew a lifetime ago..”

Sutan put his arm around her as Violet whispered her story in the deep of the night.

***

Jinkx bit her cuticles nervously, answering Adore’s FaceTime call from her hotel bed. “Hey.”

“Hi,” Adore whispered. “How are you? Did you sleep okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. How’s Lasky?”

“Still passed out.”

“No. I mean…”

“I know what you mean,” Adore sighed. “I don’t know, Jinkxy. She was a mess, I don’t...Sharon really got in her head. We saw her again on the way out and it was just like...god, what an /asshole./”

“Yeah.”

“What are you gonna do?” Adore asked. “You can’t stay at some hotel. This is your house.”

“I know. But...Adore, Alaska has never believed me. I’ve tried to explain to her, about my life before, but. She’s always known this version of me. The sober version. You know? And...I promise I’ve tried but she just doesn’t want to hear it.”

“I think you need to tell her everything.”

“Everything? That could take awhile.”

Adore laughed. “Well...yeah…”

***

“Nooooo.” Ruby groaned. “Please, turn it off.”

“... It’s the sun?”

“You’re lying, it’s december. The earth is dead.”

Ruby could hear Max laugh, and if she could, she would have reached out and kicked him, but under the covers was so lovely and warm.

“I told you not to get the last glass of wine.” Ruby could feel the mattress dip, and she considered once again if it would be worth kicking Max.

“It went with my dress.”

“It did.”

Ruby opened her eyes. The night before had been insane. She still wasn’t sure if she was happy that she had gone with Max to his work party, but it had somehow worked out to be an amazing night, her and Pearl dancing on the tables while someone named April or June sprayed champagne at them. Her and Max had gone home so late that her favorite corner pizzeria had actually closed, but she hadn’t cared, until she woke up with the worst hangover of her life.

“Here, have some tea.” Max was sitting on the edge of the bed, the flower tray Ruby had gotten so used to in hand.

“Thank you.. You’re the best.”

“Come on, baby, you’ll feel better,” Adore cooed, brushing some matted blonde hair off Alaska’s forehead.

“No, I don’t wanna…” Alaska whimpered, covering her eyes, pushing away the vile-smelling hangover cure Adore was trying to force upon her. “It smells disgusting…”

“It is. And then you’ll throw up and you’ll feel better.”

“Nooo…”

Suddenly the bedroom door banged open and Jinkx sailed in, dressed in her evening gown from the night before, tossing her fur coat onto a chair, followed by their building handyman, Raul, with a dolly full of boxes. Alaska shrieked and dove under the covers. Adore reached out and gave Raul a fist bump, seemingly unbothered that she was topless, in a pair of lace underpants. “Hola, what’s up?”

“Hola, Miss Adore,” he replied cheerfully. “Miss Jinkx, where would you like the boxes?”

Right here is perfect,”Jinkx said, handing him a tip. “Thanks, Raul.” She leaned over the bed and smacked Alaska on the ass, as Raul left the room, closing the door behind him. “Come out! Pouting time is over!”

Alaska crept out from under the covers, a frown on her face. “Excuse me, I’m still mad at--”

“Right, right, I know.” Jinks began opening boxes and dumping the contents onto the bed - dozens and dozens of tabloids and trashy magazines. “You say that I’m keeping things from you? Well, here it is. Here’s everything. My life in tabloids. Have at it.”

“I-” Alaska began, but was cut off by another box being dumped out on the bed.

Adore picked up a magazine, the cover a picture of Jinkx straddling some random girl in a bar while another girl grabbed her by the hair and the headline /DRUNKEN SOCIALITE BAR BRAWL/, laughing hysterically. “Damn, Jinkxy. I hope you won this fight.”

“Of course I won. I slept with both of them. I mean, I think. Who was that? Oh yeah. Both of them. And the bartender.”

Adore laughed, leaning over to give her a high-five as Jinkx turned the last box upside-down. Jinkx looked at Alaska, who’s face was solemn, examining the sea of tabloids.

“Hey. Look at me.”

Alaska looked up, a lock of hair around her finger.

Jinkx took her chin gently in her fingers, her other hand resting on Adore’s shoulder. “I never meant to hide anything. Okay? I pulled all this shit from storage - where I keep it out of sight, because, you know...gross. But I do keep it. Because I don’t ever want to be this person again. So you need to look at this shit, and tell me. Are you okay with who I used to be? Can you handle it?”

Alaska threw up her hands, exasperated. “Of course, I just needed a minute! I just-”

“Really?” Jinkx asked.

“Oh shit,” Adore said, holding up another paper, which read, /NIGHTY-NIGHT JINKXY/, across a photo of Jinkx sprawled facedown on a table in a nightclub, ass out. Raja and Bianca were chatting nonchalantly in the background. Both Jinkx and Alaska shot her a look. “Sorry,” she said with a slight laugh, pawing back through the piles of magazines.

“Jinkx, listen. Okay, I know that you had a fucked up past. I know all of that. I probably saw most of these in the supermarket while they were happening. But, like, the thing with Sharon just threw me, okay? Sharon and I, we had a very messed up situation. And when she produced Cabaret? That was one of the GOOD years. I mean, that’s how I remember it. So, yeah, it fucking got to me.”

“Well, if it helps, I don’t think I slept with Sharon.”

“You don’t?”

“No,” Jinkx said. “I mean, you know, anything is possible. But I called my friend Sarah, who was also in the show, and she remembers all of us partying and she said that Sharon was never involved. But...I can’t know for sure. So you have to figure out what that means for you.”

Alaska nodded. “I know.”

***

“Are you really doing gold for New Years?” Betty sipped her drink, the sugary caramel helping her perk up. “It’s like.. So passé..”

“Classics can’t be passé Betty.” Violet and Betty were at Violet’s desk, the two going over their final pre holiday presentation where the last of the pieces for the New Year’s miniature collection would be chosen.

“They can if they’re boring.”

Violet rolled her eyes. “And neon pink is better?”

“Neon is hot right now.”

“If you’re 13.”

“Better than 55.”

“Girls, girls.” Betty and Violet turned, Shane looking up from his desk. “You’re both pretty.”

“Shut up Shane.”

***

“Yes?” Bianca asked, stepping into her shoes, as Joslyn opened her office door a crack.

“Uh...I’m not really sure what to do. There’s some people here to see you who aren’t on the schedule--”

“Well, send them away. I’m on my way to the NBC lunch, and then I have the--”

“I tried, they won’t leave.”

Bianca rolled her eyes. “Well, who the fuck is it?”

“That actress, Farrah whatever? The one who used to be really amazing when she was a kid but now she's on that dumb Disney show? And her momager, who’s terrifying, by the way,” Josyln whispered.

“Ugh, fine, let them in. How the fuck did they get past reception?” Bianca grumbled.

“I think there’s a temp up there.”

“Fire them.”

“Copy,” Joslyn said, and then left to get Farrah and her momager supreme, Darienne Lake.

“Well, well, well, what a beauuuutiful office you have, Ms. Del Rio!” Darienne began.

“Save it,” Bianca barked. “I’m late for a lunch. What do you want?”

Darienne and Farrah sat down. “You remember my daughter, I’m sure.”

“Yeah, hi.” Bianca nodded in Farrah’s direction. The blonde gave her a flirtatious little wave, blowing a kiss.

“Well, she’s been trying to break her way out of that Disney box and into the pop music scene, but I’m afraid we’re getting nowhere. We’d like your help.”

Bianca laughed. “I’m not in the music industry.”

“But, you make stars.”

“I don’t /make/ stars. Can you even sing, Farrah?”

Darienne laughed. “Who cares? We’re talking about pop music! We want her to do a collaboration with Courtney.”

“I think we’d look really cute together, don’t you?” Farrah fluttered her lashes.

Bianca sighed. “Okay, this is ridiculous. Why don’t you call /Courtney’s/ manager? I have literally nothing to do with her career.”

Darienne closed her eyes briefly. “I was afraid you’d say something like that. I guess I have no choice but to remind you of the night you first met my daughter. Almost 2 years ago.” She pulled out a manila envelope and handed it to Bianca. “Emmy Awards. You were pretty intoxicated.”

Bianca glared at her for a few moments before taking the envelope and pulling out the contents. A few slightly grainy photos of her chatting with Farrah...and then touching her hair...and then one of them kissing. /Fuck. Courtney is gonna lose her goddamn mind./

“I’m sure you’re doing the math in your head already, but she was 16 in those photos.”

Bianca stuffed the pictures back into the envelope, pulling together her poker face. “We were in public. All this proves is that I’m a lecherous asshole. Everyone already knows that. So this bullshit attempt at blackmail isn’t going to work--”

“But what about what happened afterwards?” Darienne asked coyly.

“What are you talking about?” Bianca asked slowly.

Darienne looked over at Farrah, who looked down at her hands, saying softly, “I was so scared. I mean...it was my first time. But Ms Del Rio kept saying how beautiful I was, and so I…I let her...it was my fault, I should have said...” she looked up, a single tear rolling down her cheek.

Bianca stared at her, horrified.

“Pretty good, huh?” she asked, a wicked smirk on her lips, brushing the tear away.

“Why the fuck do you wanna be a pop star? You could be Meryl Streep.”

Farrah laughed, tossing her hair. “I wanna EGOT. I’ve already got the Emmy.”

Darienne rose from her seat. “Look, no one wants to release those photos, or tell that terrible story. We just want to work together.”

“Oh, right, you’re just a nice normal mother-daughter team.”

“Exactly!”

“Jesus Christ.” Bianca shook her head.

“We know that the holidays are coming up, so we’ll check back in January on the collab. I trust that gives you enough time to use your influence and make something happen. Enjoy that lunch, B!”

“Ta ta!” Farrah sang, tossing Bianca a kiss and sailing out the door after her mother.

***

“Darling, you look lovely tonight,” Patrick said, taking Fame’s hand. They were in the car on the way to yet another holiday party. It had been an exhausting week, crammed full of social obligations and Patrick couldn’t wait for the proper holiday to begin.

“Thank you,” Fame replied tersely.

Patrick moved closer to her. “Just think, my love. In less than 48 hours, we’ll be lounging in the sun, cocktail in hand, Caribbean breezes on our faces…” He kissed her cheek gently.

Fame sighed. “Yes, that’ll be nice. Away from...all this.”

“Are you alright, dear?” he asked tentatively. He could see that she was brooding slightly, and although his normal inclination was to just let her work through it, he was afraid that if they didn’t talk to each other right now, things could quickly get out of hand.

“I think...maybe we should see someone when we’re back in town.”

“See someone?” Patrick cocked an eyebrow, puzzled.

“A therapist.”

“Oh.” Patrick swallowed. /See/ someone.

Fame bit her lip and looked at him. “I think it would be good for us. I still...I think we have things to work through, and I think it would be smart to get help. Is that...would you be okay with that?”

Patrick gazed at her, placing a hand on her soft cheek and leaning in for a tender kiss. “Of course, my love.”

***

“Hey Trix?”

“Yes?”

“Are we bad parents?”

Trixie turned to look at his wife. ”Why would you think that?”

“I mean, isn’t getting tissues for our kid as a Christmas present kinda lame?” Katya looked into their basket, the bright and sparkling packages of Kleenex with cartoon characters on them

They were in Target, the hustle and bustle of worried Brooklyn moms and busy families all around them, Katya getting the last ingredients for the sochivo pudding for their Christmas dinner. Trixie had insisted on coming, Max staying behind and watching Ivan as he and Katya had driven out in Katya’s car. Normally Katya loved going to Target with her husband, picking out yogurts and finding funny shirts with ugly prints, the time one of her favorite dates with Trixie, but she couldn’t help but look at the other families that had stacks and stacks of toys in their carts.

“Not really. I mean, it’s kind of his favorite thing.” Trixie took one of the boxes out of the cart, holding it up. “He’s gone through 12 boxes at work already.”

“But shouldn’t we get him like...stuffed animals or one of those big Fisher-Price playsets or something? Look at that fancy play kitchen over there!” She pointed to another cart.

“It’s not what the gift costs, but the thought behind it.”

Katya smiled and leaned forward, kissing Trixie. “You’re amazing.”

***

“Oh my /god/,” Courtney flopped onto the bed, throwing down her bags, letting Bianca pull her into an embrace. “That was the longest overnight of my entire life. Those bitches are /insane./”

“The Housewives wore you out, huh?”

“B, omigod. So, first of all, you know, I got that news about my dad being in the hospital, so I was kind of freaking out.”

“Yeah, I know. He’s fine though, right?”

“Yeah, it turns out it was a false alarm, thank god. But at that point the tests hadn’t come back and so we still didn’t know. But Bethenny and Luann got into this ridiculous fight and Bethenny called Luanna a whore, or something, and Luann comes outside where I was trying to FaceTime dad and she’s trying to recount their conversation and I’m like, putting it into perspective and telling her my dad’s in the hospital and she’s like ‘a /whore/ Courtney, a /whore/, I mean have you ever heard such a thing?’”

Bianca burst out laughing. “I’m glad your dad is okay, baby.”

“Yeah. I’m gonna see him when I go for Mardi Gras, so that’ll be fun. Omigod.” She sighed. “What time is our flight tomorrow?”

“10. And don’t worry, I’ve already basically packed for you,” Bianca gestured to an open suitcase.

“Did you put jewelry to match my outfits in little ziplock bags?” Courtney asked, climbing on top of her.

“Of course.”

“Mmmm, your organizational skills are so sexy…” Courtney purred, leaning down to kiss her neck.

Bianca’s phone began to ring and she whispered, “Hold that thought,” before answering her phone.

Courtney sat back on her heels, slowly unbuttoning her top, teasingly opening it while Bianca spoke to someone at the magazine about layouts for their next issue.

“...I said get it done, and don’t be a messy little cunt like last time!” Bianca barked, hanging up. “Now, where were we?”

Courtney frowned, crossing her arms over her chest.

“What?” Bianca asked, picking up on her disapproving expression.

“Kind of a mood killer to hear you speak to someone like that, doncha think?”

“It’s just work, who cares?”

“Well, as someone who’s been on the receiving end of that kind of energy, it wasn’t very fun. It was actually demeaning and awful and-”

Bianca laughed. “Please, teach me more about office politics. You’re so experienced from your four month career as an assistant.”

Courtney closed her mouth, eyes blazing with anger for a second before saying quietly, “You know what would be really sexy? If you didn’t think I was an idiot.” She climbed off the bed, slapping away Bianca’s hands.

“Baby, come on, you’re being-”

“Save it.” Courtney walked over to the bathroom and began to run the hot water for a shower.

Bianca jumped up from the bed to follow her. “Courtney. I’m sorry. Please look at me, baby, please!” She put her hands on Courtney’s shoulders, lips grazing her ear. “I don’t think you’re an idiot; I think you’re perfect. I just didn’t want to get into a whole work discussion right now, I wanted to be with you...” Bianca sucked gently on her neck, hands sliding around her body. “I’m sorry for being dismissive.”

Courtney closed her eyes and leaned her head back. “Okay.”

“Okay, you forgive me?” Bianca nuzzled her shoulder.

“Yeah.” Courtney wriggled free of her grasp. “I’m sorry too, I’m probably just on edge from dealing with neurotic Upper East Side tantrums for two days. I’ll be fine once I get some rest.”

“Alright.” Bianca watched her while she shed her clothes, back still turned. “Baby?”

“Yes?” Courtney asked, stepping into the shower.

“I love you.”

“Love you too, B.” Courtney gave her a tense smile, pulling the curtain closed.

#galactica #au aag verse #rpdr fanfiction #my fics

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0v3rachi3v3r · 7 years ago

Note

Hi Elliott! As part of the aph ask event, I'd like to ask you a question about Japanese volcanoes. Is there a mythology associated with them? Or tradition/festivals? Thank you for your answer :D

A lot of stuff I found was about Mt. Fuji, but I’m going to try to share some about lesser known volcanoes too! (On a side note, trying to find stuff on these gods/goddesses were a PAIN because there are so many characters named after them from TV shows to games and I want to find the original gods but nooooo when I just type their names, I get characters -_-)

Anyways, I’m going to start at the folktale 竹取物語 (Taketori Monogatari) or the Tale of the Bamboo Cutter (also known as かぐや姫の物語, “Kaguya-Hime no Monogatari”, the Tale of Princess Kaguya). The story goes that this one bamboo cutter finds a shining stalk of bamboo. He cuts it open and there’s a thumb-sized girl!!! So he takes her home and raises her with his wife as his own kid. Since then, whenever he cuts a stalk of bamboo, he finds gold nuggets inside, and he becomes rich. Girl eventually grows up to be a regular-sized, absolutely stunningly beautiful woman, and everyone falls in love with her. 5 princes ask for hand in marriage, she says no. Emperor asks and she says no. Why? Because she’s a princess from the moon and must return to the moon soon. When her moon-friends came to pick her up, she wrote a letter to the Emperor and left the elixir of immortality. Emperor’s super sad bc the love of his life just dumped him (That’s Rough Buddy™), so he orders that the letter and the elixir be burnt at the tallest mountain (which, you guessed it, is now known as Mt. Fuji!) in hopes that Moon Princess gets the message.So what does this story have to do with volcanoes and myths? Well, that’s where (according to legend) that the word immortality or 不死 (fushi) became the name of the mountain.

Another myth related to volcanoes is the one about the birth (and death) Kagutsuchi, the god of fire (see where I’m going?). In the myth, Kagutsuchi’s birth caused Izanami’s death, and so the angry husband/brother, Izanagi, killed Kagu (and honestly that’s fine because gods are some angry piss-babies). Now, this is where the English and Japanese pages differ: In the Japanese pages, it says that the body and blood of Kagutsuchi created more deities while the English page says that the body created 8 volcanoes and the blood created more deities. After a little more digging (and input from my weeb-ass, booknerd bf) I’ve linked the disconnect to the fact that each mountain/volcano (however small) has its own deity associated with it. Honestly, the only reason I’m including Kagu’s story is to insert this image:

source (x)

Speaking of fire, everyone loves setting stuff on fire, right? If festivals are more up your alley than stories, you’d like the Aso Fire Festival. It’s a festival that’s held in Kumamoto prefecture in Kyushu, near Mt. Aso which is the largest active volcano in Japan (and among the largest in the world!). The main event is Dai Himonjiyaki. They burn 火 (the Chinese character for “fire”) into the side of the mountains Ojodake and Hondaka (which are not part of the five peaks that are part of the central cone group of Aso, but still a part of the Aso caldera). At some angles, the two “fire”s line up to create 炎 (Chinese character for “flame”). The festival is held mostly for tourism, but the origins were actually (sort of) important. They would set fire to the plains to maintain the pasture grass, and they basically said “well we’re setting fire to things anyways, let’s make a party out of it and get money too!” This festival is held in mid March, but I’d be weary of visiting since this active volcano last erupted in October of 2016 (while Fuji, the “active” volcano last erupted in the early 1700s).

Anyways, this concludes the post, but let me tell ya, there were loads, and I mean LOADS of stories and festivals about volcanoes, and if you’re interested, you can message me and I can make another post!

#hetaliafandomhub #aphaskevent #aphindonesia

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beanjuice-duh · 8 years ago

Text

Fly me to the Moon

[Next Part] A/N: Shamelessly saw some really inspiring art. Decided to write it. Probably only a three-four part fluff.

Summary: Rainbow drags Johan to New York for a thing. Johan finds out New York is pretty neat after all.

WordCount: 3855 Warnings: None that I know of

“This is so great, I am so happy you decided to come with me!” Rainbow beamed the moment they got out of JFK. “New York City, ugh, this place is absolutely amazing. Can you believe just a few weeks ago that huge protest happened right here, a united stand towards equality on the same ground we are walking on.” “Which one?” The man who accompanied her and all her chatter; rolled his luggage along as they approached the rental car station. “I’m pretty sure New York has a protest every other night. Why else would the streets be so dirty?” Bow shot Johan a dirty look as he pulled his hair into a bun. Rainbow had been invited to a Medical Convention down at Columbia Presbyterian Hospital. The convention from what Johan remembered from her babbling was just a bunch of doctors getting together to advocate their liberal ideals of health care and free, unbiased treatment. Or something… Rainbow picked out a sweet 2016 Chevy Impala. “Alright, let's go!” She spun the keys around her finger, even after flying across the country she seemed perfectly fine and fresh...in comparison to her younger brother who seemed to have grown crustier the longer he went without caffeine and wifi. “Seriously? You pick the newest car they have? Rainbow do you know where we are?” Johan shook his head, Rainbow’s naivety was showing brighter than the colors in an actual rainbow. “This car screams ‘rob me I’m not from here’” “Johan, please we are in New York City not some third world country. Now get your behind in the car or I will leave you behind.” She motioned Johan into the passenger seat. With a defeated sigh he marched himself into the car dumping their luggage in the trunk. “Honestly, this is NYC, a mecca of liberal, free thinkers, don’t you feel innovation and empowerment just oozing from the atmosphere? Some say it's a lot like California.” “And just like California and every other city there is a large rate of marginalization and angry prejudices.” He countered, his eyes on his phone as he scanned yelp for the nearest 4-5 star place to eat. After a long flight and listening to Rainbow chime and chirp for hours, Johan was ready for a big breakfast and a tall glass of Cabernet. “Don’t be fooled by your idealism of cities who voted Hilary, New York is basically the Thunder-dome, shall I remind you about some of the racially charged assaults and murders that’s happened the last few years in New York alone?” “Johan if I listened to every single report about a ‘brother’ or a ‘sister’ going down because of the color of our skin I would be in over hundreds of years of negativity. Things are what they are but we still have to live on, for example I had a patient once came in with a nasty tumor, it looked life threatening and lo and behold…” And there she went. Johan tuned her out. He wished he had his sister’s ability to look at a clearly black and white world and see nothing. She lived in a world where she could fix things and the color of skin didn’t matter. Johan was living in the now, with President Trump and countless senseless acts of injustice. It was times like these he wished he was back in Europe, backpacking his way to seclusion away from the worries and troubles of their present world. Alas, Dre basically begged him to go with Bow, with reason. If this was how she was coming to New york, with some cinematic mentality of a hopeful city then there was a good chance Dre would be looking for wife number 2. Not to mention Bow was expecting.

After a good hour moving through streets that mirrored LAX, bumper to bumper traffic and an endless symphony of horns blasting from all directions, Johan finally looked up from his phone. (Because it died). He noticed Bow was leaning into the steering wheel, squinting at the nearby street sign. “...you’re lost.”

“Nooooo” she held out the word for some time, puckering her lips as her eyes look more and more like a deer caught in headlights. “I’m just...making sure what number we’re on.” Rainbow made a left down from Ft. Washington and West 176th street into a little Avenue called Haven. The brick buildings were jammed together side by side it looked like they were built as one continuous unit. She parked the car in front of a corner store and sighed. “Ok...we have to be close…” she ran her hand along the side of the steering wheel. “This looks like a little local place.”

“This looks like the where that murder case happened.” Johan answered her.

“What case?” Rainbow blinked, curious if this was truly the scene of a crime.

Johan’s lips turned up into a cold smirk, “the one where two Californians were lost in the ghetto’s of New York city and found dead and dumped into the Hudson. One a wonderful, handsome, well loved adventurous spirit and his idiotic sister who happened to be a decent doctor.” He wasn’t surprised Rainbow slapped his shoulder. He was a little surprised it actually hurt. “Bow just use the GPS on your phone.”

“Or instead of wasting batteries I can ask for directions. My phone is dying and Dre promised he’d call me when the kids got home from school.” She was not going to lose the rest of her battery for something as silly as directions. “Why don’t you use your GPS?”

“My phone died, where is your charger?” Johan arched his eyebrow.

Bow did the same, copying his expression. “In my luggage, where is yours?”

“Same.” There was a silence between them, absorbing their shared moment of absentmindedness. Neither willing to dig through their luggage for a couple of chords. Siblings through and through.

“Look, locals have the best directions. I’ll go ask one and we’ll be on our way. I have to check into the Hospital before we get to our Hotel.” Bow exited the car leaving the keys and the car unlocked. Not waiting for protests the pregnant doctor scampered across the street to a nearby appliance store. Johan watched his hard headed, pregnant sister did whatever it was she wanted, and hoped he didn’t have to be the one telling Dre he lost her. It took him a split second to realize she left the car unlocked and keys still in the ignition.

“She is seriously asking for someone to …AH?!” He jumped at the sight of a young man walking past the car. His hands in his jacket as he tilted his head, eyeing up the vehicle. Johan scrambled to take the keys from the ignition and locked the car. The loud click of all four door locks going off made the young man stop in mid-step. He gave Johan an undisturbable look before continuing his stride into the corner store.

“Sonny you’re late...Again.”

“Aw~ chill out primo, I was at class.” Sonny smirked walking through the chip aisle, snagging a bag of fifty cent doritos. His cousin shook his head, the class did nothing for his slang apparently.

“Nice try, your last class was over an hour ago.” Usnavi glared from behind his polished counter. “Let me guess, you were with your boyfriend, again.” He grunted not waiting for Sonny’s confirmation, his silence was enough. “I hope Pete is worth the pay cut.”

“Aw, come on, Navi! Don’t be like that.” That got Sonny’s attention. He came out from the aisle and leaned over his counter. “Pete is going off to art school in California, I gotta take these moments as they come.”

“Art School in California? Is that what they call moving-into-your-abuela’s beach-house-so-you-can-get-high-all-the-time these days?” Usnavi didn’t hide the fact he wasn’t too keen on Sonny’s choice of lovers. Not because he was gay, god no, Usnavi was not like that. It was because Pete had...so little professional ambition. Sonny was studying hard, got himself through community college now was looking at a fancy scholarship. Sonny wasn’t like Nina, it took him two years of ass busting in a community school to get his GPA to a place he could even be offered a dime. Usnavi was his biggest supporter though the idea of him losing it all rang a little too close to home. Luckily Sonny knew what he wanted, he wanted to get into law. Make the world a safer place, it wasn’t too long ago someone in their neck of the woods was faced with injustice. Sonny was living in the prime of social justice. The world needed more Sonnys in Usnavi’s eyes. That all said that didn’t mean he was going to take it easy on him. “Real jobs would fire you for how many times you’re late. No more lovey sob stories, get here on time.”

“Si señor” Sonny rolled his eyes, he leaned back eyeing up the fancy Impala that was illegally sitting in front of the store. “Yo I think he’s lost.” Sonny motioned to the skittish, big haired man sitting in the car staring out of every window.

“He’s probably waiting for someone.” Usnavi was guilty of standing around waiting for someone to run back to the car. Parking in New York was terrible. “He’ll leave soon.”

“Nah, man locked his car when he saw me pass by. He’s totally not from New York, he’s lost. I know that face.” He pointed with a cheesy covered fingertip. “That's the same face those tourists get when they realize they don’t know how to get out of Time Square. Man is lost.”

Usnavi looked out the window and wondered if it was true. He did look nervous. Not to take offense, most people who didn’t grow up in the Heights or anywhere else would have been frightened of New York City. It was a pretty intimidating city at first glance. Gritty and hard to make a living, but the real locals were just regular people trying to get by. None of those thugs and criminals sneaking around every corner with a glock in their waistband. Sure, they had some, every place had some but overall...people here were just like family. All living life and wanting the same thing...a fucking break. “He’s fine.”

“We should help him out, like, get him to buy something for directions.” Sonny nodded, partly because he wanted to mess with him a little more. “I got it.”

“Sonny? Sonny! Get your ass back here--aye mi madre ese niño me va da un solo ataque del corazón! (this kid is gonna give me a heartattack!)” Usnavi felt the stress rising as he watched Sonny walk out of the store and right up to the car. All Usnavi could do was wait, and have 911 on speed dial in case Sonny got himself into trouble.

Sonny approached the car once more. He peered into the window and gently tapped the glass. Johan jumped in surprise, he placed a hand to his chest like he was some B rank movie actress caught in a bad scene. He merely watched as Sonny motioned him to lower his window. Everything in him said get the hell out of here but he couldn’t drive off without Bow...she knew where their hotel was. Slowly, Johan pressed the window button and lowered it only just an inch. “Yes? C-Can I help you?” He was well prepared to give all of Rainbow’s belongings to save his neck. “You lost, friend?” Sonny smiled, a dimple forming at one side of his face. He looked...a lot more approachable when he smiled, just a young man with a very...openly friendly face. “Just askin’ cause like...you’re kinda parked in a no standing zone...Don’t want you to get a ticket...so if you need directions or something?” Johan looked up and noticed there was, in fact, a white and red sign that said no standing in front of the car. “Uh.” He blinked for a second. There was a catch, what was the catch, if he stepped out of this car right now was he going to get shanked? Johan was momentarily possessed by his sister’s spirit and got out of the car. Unlike her though, he took the keys and locked it once he stepped out. “A bit, yeah.” He admitted, looking down at Sonny. Before Sonny could implement his plan on of swapping knowledge with profit, Johan’s stomach growled like something fierce. It was nearly noon and they still hadn’t stopped to eat anywhere. These were trying times, “Do you know where I can grab a bite to eat?” “Actually I do~” Sonny’s cheeky grin somehow got even cheekier. “I know the single most amazing little place that serves breakfast sandwiches like you wouldn’t believe!” He turned and motioned to the store behind him. “Really? Because I already believe this will give me food poisoning…” He blinked a few times but after another rumble from his stomach Johan released his good senses in favor for anything edible. Sonny waltzed ahead of him, opening the door for Johan. Surely a customer would repay his tardiness to Usnavi. As soon as they walked in they were greeted with a “Good Morning.” Usnavi smiled brightly from the counter. Johan paused, the greeting wasn’t the regular top of the morning, how are you, please get what you want and leave sort of greeting. It was a homey almost welcoming sort of greeting. It had a ring to it like he was walking into someone’s kitchen. Too bad this place smelled like someone’s dank cooler. “What can I get for you?” Johan moved his eyes from the warm voiced fellow by the counter and scanned the menu for sometime. He was silent until Sonny tapped the counter with his knuckle and ordered for him, “Give him the best you got, primo.” Sonny winked at his cousin. Usnavi nodded and started cooking up his famed breakfast sandwich paired with a coffee all under five dollars. A deal New Yorkers dreamed of. “So, tell me, where you headed? Maybe I can help you out.” Right, directions, the other thing Johan needed. “My sister and I are looking for…” He snapped his fingers a bit, she had been talking about all flight...all week...what was .. “Colombian Hospital?” There was a small laugh that came from the griddle. Johan’s ears grew warm and pink at the sound. “You mean the ER? Uh...thats like...if you go down Broadway...or take River Drive.” Usnavi looked up from his griddle “Sonny shut up, you don’t even know how to get to your house without your maps app.” He continued to smile finding the lost newcomer funny, but he couldn’t sit there and get the poor man even more lost. “It's not maps app, its google, lord.” He rolled his eyes at his old fashion cousin. “Yeah, yeah why don’t you make yourself useful, man the griddle.” Sonny begrudgingly obeyed, he walked around the counter and took over Usnavi’s spot. While Usnavi went back to the counter top, facing Johan now. “Columbia Presbyterian Hospital, you’re real close. River Drive is terrible, you’re going to be stuck there for hours. What you’re gonna do is follow Haven down to 168th and Ft. Washington again and boom, it's gonna be right there, you can’t miss it.” “Huh, we were on Ft. Washington I wonder how we missed it to begin with.” Johan was a little ...surprised that Usnavi helped him so quickly and easily. A part of him felt a tad guilty for being so judgmental a few moments ago. “Don’t sweat it most newcomers aren’t taking in the sights of the city, they’re too busy watching their backs and keeping their eyes on the street.” He was no stranger to people being wry. “Once you pull back the stink of the city you get use to the people, and nothing about it is scary.” “Yeah only scary thing around here is your hat~” Sonny chuckled, earning himself a glare from Usnavi who purposely adjusted his cap a little more. “The hat is fine.” Johan blurted out, unsure why he felt like coming to the defense of Usnavi. He was so warm and welcoming, though watching him glare was probably equally as strangely warm and satisfying he felt the urge to insist otherwise. “I mean...its dated yes, but newspaper boy hats are cute, its like a ...Newsies style.” He spoke and both Usnavi and Sonny gave him a blank stare. Johan felt the heat rise to his face, “a Melton look?” They blinked in unison. Johan felt his cheeks heat up with color. “Its vintage, very cute.” “Ah…” Usnavi’s face did the same, he didn’t get most of the references but what he did get was the word ‘cute’. Usnavi was facing an academic so it seemed. “I mean they’re not all the rage with the kids now but wait a few more years.” “Actually kids now are loving the throwback vintage looks, France use to be big on berets, then they stopped once the Americans began sticking them onto every French representation from character to cartoon like it was meant to signifies this was French. Now it's back in style, more so even.” Johan rambled ostentatiously about his beloved-temporary home of France. How he missed teaching there...though it was nice to be home. He felt himself caught between wanting out of this place and wanting to be part of a family. Either way Johan was in a standstill in his life, suddenly talking about France was not doing him any good. Usnavi must have noticed the change in Johan’s face once he stopped rambling, the excited glow had subsided.

He did what he did best, a poor, awkward joke in hopes for a smile. “Is it as the French say, c'est magnifique?” Usnavi literally only knew that word from a movie he saw once. Johan’s eyes softened a bit. His pronunciation was pretty poor. Usually he didn’t take the jokes without undoing them and making them no longer funny. But something about Usnavi’s shy delivery combined with probably how mind-numbingly hungry Johan was made him chuckle a bit. “I would say your accent is equally magnifique.” Johan placed his hand on the counter, leaning in a bit as Usnavi placed a fist to his mouth, covering his shaky laughter. His other hand tipped down the brim of his hat. There was a strange warmth that washed over him, and it wasn’t just the summer heat of the city beating down on the corner store. Usnavi wasn’t use to having a charismatic customer like Johan...it was nice talking to someone who wasn’t a regular. A clean slate. Usnavi found the courage to meet Johan’s gaze and didn’t question why he found himself smiling wider at the sight of him. “How do you like your coffee?” Sonny’s voice broke both their gazes,forcing Johan to look over at Sonny and Usnavi to look down at his counter. “Hm... “ He looked over the store again, “I’m going to guess you don’t serve freshly ground beans?” Usnavi smirked shaking his head a bit, “Sadly we don’t grind our own beans but we have the best coffee in New York.” The shorter man turned around and picked up a yellow tin can and placed it in front of Johan. “May I entice your senses to the single most amazing brand, the very lifeblood of our people. Bustelo Coffee.” He motioned to the can, Johan rolled his eyes but his smile was wider than ever. “I recommend drinking it light and sweet unless you want to put some hair on your chest then black.”

“Whats a couple more hairs on my body.” Johan answered, and Usnavi’s Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed. “I’ll take it the way you do.” He swallowed again. “I flip between light and sweet or straight black… I usually go for a happy medium.” Usnavi answered honestly unable to come up with something else that was clever. Sonny was much better at this banter, the playful kind, after a while Usnavi’s natural shyness and word fumbling came out. “I’ll take the happy medium then.” Johan was actually relaxing now, Sonny had placed a breakfast sandwich on a paper plate for him, spiced sausage with a runny egg and a couple of avocado slices. All between some buttered, toasted buns. Johan was in mid bite, enjoying the smooth, spicy, creamy sensation of a perfectly balanced sandwich when Rainbow walked into the store. “There you are! Do you know why the car is locked I swore I left it unlock..” She walked over to Johan, his mouth full of food. She looked over at Usnavi and smiled brightly. “Good Morning” He beamed politely. “...also I recommend not leaving your car unlocked. I don’t think anyone around here would rob it but I know plenty of knucklehead kids who would gladly take a nap in a car with an a/c” “Jesus, I do that one time and I never hear the end of it.” Sonny groaned, “the guy didn’t even press charges.” Usnavi chuckled, giving Johan some time to chew before addressing his this woman, was this the sister he mentioned? “Where have you been?” Johan glanced over at her, running his thumb against the corner of his lips to save a morsel of food. He was damn hungry and this was a damn good sandwich even for his palette. “I was looking for someone to give me directions, I ran into several people but...we had a bit of a language barrier.” She blushed a bit, “I didn’t think my Spanish was too bad.” From the look she was giving him, and the fact she was empty handed oh it must have been bad. Johan didn’t say that out loud though. “I got directions, no thanks to you. It just proves my resourcefulness in the city surpasses your weird romanticized ideals of this city.” “You’re Welcome!” Sonny called out from the back again. Rainbow shook her head, “Ok, fine, maybe you’re a little more savvy than I am. But this city is a lot nicer than you say it is.” She jabbed her finger into Johan’s arm. She turned to Usnavi and Sonny smiling, “Thank you for the directions, Johan pick me up a coffee, I’m going to get in the car before we get hit with a ticket!” Bow scampered out of the store. Johan felt eyes on him, Usnavi’s eyes who were staring up at him with a thousand questions. “So you think the city is pretty bad huh?” Usnavi accused in a way that sounded playful but Johan still felt guilty. “Blame the media falsely glorifying the common chicanery about New York.” He blushed a bit, Usnavi’s face softened. “...but she’s right, New York is a lot nicer than I imagined…” Perhaps, that or the people were nicer than he expected. “My sister and I will be here for a while so who knows, I might pop by for the ‘best coffee in New York’” Johan grabbed the remainder of his sandwiches and the coffee, playing for everything with a ten. “Keep the change.” Usnavi cranked his neck a bit watching Johan leave. His eyes glued to the man’s retreating back as he slid back into the 2016 Impala. He was left with only more questions, who was that strange human being. The entire time he realized he got no name from him. Nothing, just knowledge he was here and he might come back. A tender smile started to inch its way across his face. “Sweet, if he turns into a regular that HAS to make up for me being late~ Right?” Sonny smirked, Usnavi would have barked something back at him. Instead he was silent. “Usnavi?” He blinked a few times, watching his cousin. From the side all he could see was his brother’s face as the car drove off and left their store. Sonny glanced at the empty space where the car had been then back at his cousin wondering what was going on. When the answer came from Usnavi’s mouth. “You think he’ll actually come back?” (Ohyeshewill)

#crossover #crossover fic #johan johnson #usnavi de la vega #blackish #In The Heights #crossover au #fanfiction #fanfic #josnavi #johsnavi #semi edited #ran out of patience #johsnavi fic

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tokyoteddywolf · 8 years ago

Text

My Aunt Is Awesome

Okay, so my aunt is 40 something and is my favorite person in the world, (sorry Mum) and she is the best person in the world.

She joins protests to protect the Earth, she goes to Medieval Fairs and dresses up in real armor and her boyfriend makes real weapons (his name is Shane, he is a blacksmith, he has a lazy eye and he is fucking awesome as hell. He even let me try out a real spear he made, and a sword, and a short sword/dagger.), she’s a badass fighter, and she has 3 kids, one of them recently born.

Most of all, she’s a lot like me, and we understand each other really well. Sometimes if i need a break, i go over to her place with it’s crazy calmness and 2 dogs and 3 cats and i’ll chat with Shane over D&D classifications and whatnot or i’ll chill with my aunt on the couch and complain about why i needed a break. The main reason being Steve.

The story behind Steve is that he used to live with my aunt and her boyfriend in an old apartment, which they got kicked out of because of renovations. So my Mum in all her kind glory (which i half hate, half love, there’s a reason for this too) allowed them all to stay with us, my aunt getting my room while i moved into Mum’s room, and Steve getting the basement. My aunt Wendy isn’t......exactly the best person. She’s a little bit of a hoarder, and she gets paid by the government because she’s mentally ill. (Sometimes i think she’s more sane than me or my Mum, because she’s actually crazy smart but i don’t remember which illness it is, but i love her all the same.) So if you give her money, she probably won’t pay you back. Well, she’ll try, but my Mum kind of insulted her a little so they kind of had a falling out which led to Wendy and her bf (not Shane at the time, actually) moving out.

Steve stayed. I regret letting him stay. Mum regrets it too. But he stayed, and the next 4 years of my life became hell. Well, worse than usual with my “teen angst and violence” as Dad so fondly calls it (while quite happily pulling me into an armbar while we wrestle on the ground and i have to tap out before i turn and tackle him into a headlock that he easily ducks out of by flipping me over his head). Anyway, Steve wasn’t so bad at first. He helped around the house, cleaned, was quiet and kept to himself. Then he started dating my Mum. that’s when things stared going wrong, after Wendy moved out.

He started being more.....loud, i guess? It started small, so Mum didn’t really notice. But he would tell me to clean more, and how to do it, and insult me while he did whatever it was i was supposed to be doing. This went on for two years straight. He couldn’t keep any of his friends around, and he argued a lot with the neighbors. When he was angry, it was like a violent child having a temper tantrum, throwing things and yelling at the top of his lungs, but never harming me or Mum. I think he knows that if he tries, he’s on the first bus out of here. I got into plenty of screaming matches with him, and he always told me to shut up because i was just a kid and i wasn’t important in adult matters.

I have a short temper too, so i would always yell back. Mum was getting tired of this, so she told him to move out about a year ago. But, as i mentioned earlier, my Mum has a heart of gold, and when she tried to break up with him, he wheedled his way back in. But he did move away for a little while.....but he was still clingy, so i almost never saw my Mum. She was always over at his place. I can’t remember the tally count of how many times she’s told me in secret that she just wants some space from him, and how she misses being around me. I can’t stand him. I’ve never hated anyone as much as i’ve hated him. Which is why i avoid my Mum, because wherever Mum goes, Steve is right there, glued to her side. I hate doing it too, i hate avoiding my Mum because of that....that- tumor stuck to her! He smells, he smokes, he’s loud, he always thinks he’s right, he could care less about me and acts like he cares about me, but he really doesn’t if any of the screaming matches mean anything. And the complaining drives me crazy! It’s always something about his back or how his ‘friends’ ripped him off or some other annoying bland story about cars or working on the house or blah blah blah and i hate it! he’s also invasive! Sometimes, he’ll jumpscare me for fun, or try to tickle me. That’s a huge no for me, since i only allow my close family to do that. Steve is not my family, never will be. Plus, it hurts when he does it, and he thinks i’m joking when i say “stop”. He clings to my Mum, and is always chattering at her about something or other, and i can never get a full conversation with my Mum with him there because he butts in with some stupid topic, and i get pushed aside!

I hate it. I hate him. I especially hate that when he has a screaming match with me or Mum, he goes out and smokes and suddenly acts like we’re best friends. Like he’s bipolar or something, but no, it’s just that damn cigarette. Mum hates it too, but she’s too nice to tell him no, or to leave, or to get rid of him. All because he treats her nice. THERE’S NO POINT IN THAT IF THE NEGATIVES OUTWEIGH THE POSITIVES, MUM. But, it just doesn’t get through her head. Her entire family, me, my aunt, my friends, everyone is telling her to get rid of him, but she can’t for some reason! It’s awful just watching it. I’ve gotten so sick of it that i’ve just stopped trying to talk to her about it, and i’m just avoiding her now, and she doesn’t understand and i can’t explain it because it wouldn’t matter anyway. me or him. She says it’s me, but it’s really him. Because if it were me, she could probably dump me with my dad and call it good, but nooooo Steve is all alone, and his family is terrible to him, and he treats me like a queen, and he cares and yadda yadda yadda-

What am i then???? 15 years mean nothing i guess??? I’m your own daughter??? What the fuck???? I’ve saved your life from diabetic shock seizures since i was 4????? This is the thanks i get????

This is where my aunt comes in. She and i often conspire different methods to make Steve disappear. I wish Aunt Wendy was my real mom. She understands me better and takes no bullshit from anyone. She’s cool, and nice, but she’ll smack you if you really fuck up. Mum and Dad don’t understand why i like her, but hey, two wrongs make a right, ya know? Sometimes i wonder why my parents are the way that they are. I’m just.......really tired of living with someone i hate and someone who doesn't understand why i’m always alone and hiding in my room with just the internet to keep me company.

My Dad always said that while my Mum was booksmart, she’s an idiot in common sense. I’ve never agreed more. (Sorry Mum.)

#unhealthy relationships #i love my aunt #fuck you steve #why #ignore this #i'm just rambling #this got really long wow

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