#but my personal favorites are the ones where he shows an unexpected kindness and understanding

[gothamsaved]

I get a little anxious writing with any of Batman's villains cause I'm so worried I'll possibly fuck up their dynamic. ( Hi I overthink them a lot esp cause I'm trying to find a balance I'm comfortable with for my batman portrayal 😔 )

I want him to be brutal yes, he has a lot of pain and anger he expends and he will be flawed with how he handles most situations. He is only human. But I also want him to have an unyielding compassion or have that be the stubborn main force that drives him to keep fighting and trying despite how pointless it seems.

I chalk it up a lot to... Yeah I know he can be violent in how he takes his villains down — in the moment they are a danger, a threat, not just to others but possibly to themselves as well. He wants to help and recently have been trying to incorporate the idea of him seeing them not as enemies outright but people who do seriously need help and have been through awful, sometimes even traumatic situations that turned their whole lives upside down, just as his was. His ultimate goal is to rehabilitate the more reasonable villains and stop the ones he can't use reasoning with.

This comment in a video I spotted recently sums it up well and I am biting things.

[iz-star]

About Zayne's possesiveness...

With Sylus calling us "kitten" all the time, I've seen Sylus mains being torn between if they like being called that or not, for some It's totally fine but for others is such a mood killer and I'm not a Sylus main but I'd be the second one for sure.

Then I remembered that Zayne once mentioned that I was his "favorite kitty" or that I was "his pet..." something like that? And I was like "where did he say that and why didn't I cringe when he said that? Maybe this is the effect of love (xD) maybe I understand Sylus mains better? I need to find out"

Then I remembered:

If Zayne is my personal Mr Kitty Cat, then I don't mind being his favorite kitty, we were basically the ones that initiated it and even put cat ears on him... So yeah, the whole vibe of this is totally different from Sylus' pet names.

However... He calling us "his pet" was a whole different story:

The way he lets his possesiveness slide for a second? You know, all of the guys are possesive somehow, they only show it differently, in this case, Zayne's possesiveness doesn't show too often cause he's aware that to be possesive of something is to allow yourself to show your weakness, to implicitly say "This person has a great power over my feelings or my behaviour bc It's mine..." that's why he stops himself when he says "Don't leave it with anyone else or I'll—" and then changes the approach "Do you want to leave it with someone else?"

And as the player, it leaves us hanging... Thinking "What would you do, Dr Zayne? What are you willing to do?"

We have to think about these questions from the perspective of Zayne's persona, of the kind of guy he is. We know the other guys have a bounty and have committed crimes/ killed people, while Zayne has done none of that and it's on the completely opposite side of things: He's a well respected doctor, has saved tons of lifes, is obssesed about saving people, a workaholic cause he knows the world needs him. The worst thing he's done (as far as we know) is that he had to kill his friend William when he was turning into a Wanderer and even so, it was William the one who asked this of him after Zayne desperately tried to save him against all odds.

Zayne is not someone who would even think of hurt others easily, even if he's quite able to cause others harm, just as much as the other LIs, but all versions of Zayne have in common that they're really kind. Sure, Dawnbreaker is a serial killer but we know he doesn't kill people out of joy but instead mercy. Sure, Foreseer was quite severe when MC first met him but It's not as if she didn't deserve it when she literally intruded his place, lied to him and tried to steal his powers (lmao) and we know he was wary of Astra all the time so he didn't want anyone to enter the Tower for their own sake and he paid with his life the price to keep MC alive. Master of Fate was supposed to kill MC but instead he chose to seal her powers to give her another chance to keep on living the life she told him she wanted to live (even without him).

So it's interesting to think what would Zayne do for MC? Us? If he decides to be selfish and fulfill his desires, what would he do? It seemed like he was even questioning himself, showing too much of what he's not used to show (And now with SS we just know how much he needs MC/us).

So that's why he changes the approach. His feelings are involved in this sudden and unexpected show of weaknesses, so he asks us "Do you want to leave it with someone else?" Now asking us about what we feel but not quite giving us time to reply.

The way he calls us "his pet" comes now more like he's gained control of his feelings again and is calling us that as a punishment for making him go through this unwanted jealousy but he's so ambiguous and smooth about it, that is giving "if It's too much don't take it" vibes because he neither confirms nor denies that he was talking about us.

Zayne is the kind of guy that would spoil you and shows his love through different ways: taking care of you and your health, acts of service, affirmation, sparing time for you, having you as his top priority, always offering his time/ himself (Have you notice how Zayne says "My free time is all yours, do with it what you want" while Sylus says "Who is your free time for if not me? " or how Xavier asks "Do you want to sleep with me?" while Zayne asks "Do you want me to sleep with you?"), he gives and gives (and lord knows how much he's tried to change and be more careful about his words and actions so they don't come across as alof, bc yes, Zayne hates to be mistaken as a heartless person) but of course he's also willing to do all that as long as you work for it and earn it too and if you misbehave, he makes you pay for it and knows how to give you a firm "No" when you try to backpedal or get away with it.

He knows (or tries) to balance his depth love by spoiling you while at the same time letting you know that nothing comes for free (even if he'd give it for free). Balance is a word that fits him best in all the aspects of his life, especially when it comes about love. He shows his feelings if you show them too (he both says "I never thought I'd have only one person in my eyes" accepting you're the only thing he sees and he also says "I want to be the only one in your eyes and for you to be mine" expressing what he desires too in a soft way) and when he shows his possesiveness, he's letting himself to lose this balance and he probably knows that you are the only thing that could make him completely lose this balance. His evol seems to be an analogy of this behavior, Zayne is always hyperaware that he could lose control of it at any given time and maybe, when it comes about his feelings, does he feel the same? ("It wouldn't be love if I could control it"). He's scared of hurting you but is he scared of the things he'd do for you?

Especially bc, all his other lifes and the current Zayne have always shown the opposite of possesiveness, they sacrifice themselves and their happiness for your own happiness and your well being. When MC asks Foreseer Zayne "Didn't you say you don't want to lose me again?" his literal reply was "I will never lose you as long as you're alive and well" and when Master of Fate was supposed to kill MC, he chose to seal her powers away even if it also meant to sacrifice his presence in her life (even after he promissed that they would always be together and promissed not to leave her and desired fulfill those promises). Dawnbreaker's only solace is MC, he only yearns for her and nothing else, a powerful quote they say in his anecdotes is "It's better to die with clarity than living as a walking corpse" referencing to ppl that turns into Wanderers but this quote applies to Zayne too, in the sense that he's basically a walking corpse cause he doesn't live his own life. MC is the only thing that keeps him alive somehow and she's not even in his own world. Dr Zayne says "When you and the world wake up, I hope we do not meet again" bc he knows this is the best for you.

All Zayne's are filled with pent up yearning, want, need, desire, to a point It's seems it is about to overflow and he does a goddam good work at hiding it; no wonder why Dr Zayne is taking all the available chances with MC, but even he seems to be aware that this won't last forever and even in such period of time, why he seems so afraid to loose up... lose control of himself? Especially cause Dr Zayne seems to be the balance amongst all Zayne's, he's not as dark and depressive as Dawnbreaker, nor as cold and severe as Foreseer, nor as happy and carefree as Master of Fate but at the same time holds a little of all of that.

So the question here is, how a showcase of the loss of this balance would be? For now we can only imagine and come up with assumptions but I'm quite curious to see it playing fully ingame, you know? Altho I'm not sure if I'd like it if it comes at the cost of him getting hurt again.

[brbzonedout]

-Movie Night

Pairing: E!42 Miles x Spider-person!reader

Warnings: Protectiveness…if that triggers you.

Outside of Miles’s window the streets buzzed with noise, from cars honking their horns to people yelling for their kids to come inside.

It was late at night as usual and Miles was sitting at his desk listening to music as he sketched out ideas for a creative writing paper that he couldn’t visualize properly.

knock knock…

That was unexpected.

Miles turned toward his bedroom window to see you standing out there with a excited smile. The boy smirked subconsciously wondering what you were doing here this late, especially without texting him first.

He opened the window and helping you crawl through.

“Don’t worry your mom knows i’m here,” you said landing on the hard wood floor of his bedroom.

“ho-”

“I texted her..anyways look!” you lifted your phone to his face showing him the disney plus app.

Miles squinted his eyes shielding them from the phones aggressive brightness, “What am I looking at?” he stifled a laugh.

You turned the phone back to your view, eye brows furrowed, “Are we not looking at the same thing? Little mermaid is on disney plus now so we can watch it!”

“You ran all the way here just to watch The little mermaid?”

The boy closed the window behind you and took your jacket off your back to hang in his closet.

“With you…” you stated with a smile kicking off your shoes.

With a sound understanding he turned back around to face you, “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming? I coulda gotten snacks and shit.” the question came with a concern glare.

“Number one…” You held up a book bag full of both your favorite snacks.

“And two you wouldn’t have let me walk over here myself,” you grumbled, sounding slightly annoyed, seated on his edge of his bed in your hello kitty pajama pants. “then I would’ve had to wait for you to get me…then walk here….then have you walk me back home, then wait for you to get back home and you like to take stops so-”

He rolled his eyes and joined you on the bed. “Well yeah ima walk wit you, you know where we live right?”

“You realize i’m the Spinner right?” said in a whisper, matter of factly.

Miles sighed not wanting to have this conversation for the 3rd time this month. “Yeah ok y/n…lemme see the bag….please.”

You snorted getting ready to chew the boy out for his lack of manners, “I was bout to say- here.” after digging into the bag you handed over a platter of caribbean food from the place down the block.

“Wha- this is food food…”

“I may have also stopped at Mrs. Kiyana’s shop…allegedly.”

Miles stifled a laugh and took the platter. As he opened it he noticed you got everything exactly the way he liked it, jerk chicken with Jamaican cabbage, and plantains.

He held back a smile, “Thank you..” said in a soft whisper like tone as he reached his hand into the platter.

“Of course,” you reached back in the bag pulling out two forks. “I know you not about to eat that with your hands-”

The boy stopped in his tracks and awkwardly took one of them out of your hand. “Right, my bad..”

I might make a part two to this one as well. BUT I KIND OF LIKE THE WAY THIS CAME OUT!! YAY! Anyways thank you for reading<3

©brbzonedout

[silkythewriter]

Vox and wukong with a cat demon reader!

Warnings: might be a bit OOC! Haven’t written for Hazbin hotel in a while I apologize!

Fandom: Hazbin hotel and LMK

Author note:IM SO SORRY I DONT KNOW WHY TUMBLER GLITCHED OUT ON ME AND DELETED THE WHOLE THING(｡•́︿•̀｡) BUT TYSM FOR YOUR PATIENTS AND THANK YOU FOR THE HAZBIN HOTEL ASK!!!

Summary: Wukong and Vox with a cat demon reader! :D

❤️Written by silkythewriter Do not steal or repost on any other platform please! <3.❤️

🝮☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆🝮

🝮☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆🝮

Vox

In all honesty...he finds it adorable, now will he admit that is another question with a different answer..

I'm sure he's seen many upon many of cat demons in his years damned to hell, but you are different in a way he can't pin point. Maybe it's the way your tail flicks when you see him, or how your pupils grow big just at the sight of him. It's honestly a knock out for him

He finds himself curious on how your ears and tail feel. But he would never touch it unless you offer him first which he exeitedly bun-gurglingly agrees.

He's a man that's excellent at words and selling something to you. But when it comes time to actually show Affection it's...a bit rough to say the least.

He buys you special types of conditioner and shampoo for your fur, one of the finest brand might i add, which he hands to you. Simply stating "well if your gonna be seen around me of course you gotta look your best" not that he actually cares for you and wants you happy of course! He's an overlord he has a status to up hold!

Now when it comes to you actually doing cat like things he finds it very interesting and honestly adorable-

I mean look how can he not melt when your purring out words after landing on the soft couch in his office.

One time he petted the top of your head and you let out purr, when I tell you this man’s knees were weak I MEAN IT

he just has a special soft spot for you and the things you do. Like when you were over at his place about to crash on his bed but you just started kneading the soft blanket.

Look he’s a hater on the outside but a lover on the inside he has to keep a rough attitude in a place like hell. But when you guys are alone he’s doting on you more then an actual person with a cat. He just can’t help it

He loves cuddling with you at night, like the warmth you provide him is enough to make him short circuit . Hell is hot enough but your warmth is different kind of warmth, not just the overheating and overwhelming temperature of hell, but the homey feeling you get form a nice hug.

He especially loves when you wrap your tail around him or his like leg i don’t know something about it makes him lose his mind!

Although he dose have to admit finding you asleep in unexpected areas is something he doesn’t hate but doesn’t exactly like either. He quite literally has the best bed and sheets of hell just for you and you still decide to spreed out and take a nap on counter. Now that is something he will never understand

Overall though he loves you to the lower levels of he’ll and back <3

🝮☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆🝮

Wukong

Oh boy… time for our favorite monkey boy phew alright…

First of all get ready for his lil cheeky self to go around and start scaring you

You know that old trend where cat owners would throw cucumbers at their cat? Yea that’s what he dose, not only that but 60% of the time it lands smack dab on your head like it seems intentional from how many times he’s smacked you by accident.

He honestly understands how sensitive ears and tails could be so he would never yank or pull on it as a joke. Trust me he gets and understands your pain very much.

His love language is grooming, so he’s happily sit for a good while just looking through your fur and picking out small particles or maybe small dirt specs. And he loves when you do the same! Honestly a very cute bonding moment he finds it relaxing!

I feel like cat demons are a bit rare to come by, (my guess don’t quote me on this) so he finds your quite cool to look at! Especially if you have some sort of pattern or rare fur color!. He asks you all sorts of questions please don’t mind him he’s honestly curious.

He purrs too so this man dos won’t discriminate when you do it, he honestly finds it adorable just like Vox!, but unlike Vox he doesn’t mind voicing it. Although he dose it too he loves teasing you for it, jokingly of course!

Please send this man your fur care cause lord knows he probably doesn’t own the right things to take care of his fur. He appreciates if you take a day off just to show him, also massaging some of the conditioner/shampoo in his scalp will make him purr and is greatly appreciated.

Honestly I feel like he’d get jealous of those who you also let touch your fur and other stuff. He won’t cop you on it! But he loves when it feels like something only he can do and you trust him with.

As kneading this man has A TONNN of blankets collected through the years of stealing or getting gifted it. So he has tons of blankets on his bed and if he sees you kneading them he’d probably let out a loud “Awe” before tackling you. He finds it adorable! What can he say?

He has good pulse control now then when he did in his younger years but still can you really expect him not to smoother you with affection from how absolutely adorable your being?!?? (≧◡≦) ♡

Please please PLEASE let this man intertwine tails with you or make like a heart shape out of your tail’s. He just finds it so comforting and adorable!

Overall have a cat demon S/O has to be the best for him, he just loves you! And he is very affectionate, it takes him a bit to show it but after a while he’s all over you! Ｏ(≧▽≦)Ｏ

🝮☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆🝮

AHHHH TYSM FOR THE REQUEST IT WAS SO FUN PLEASE REQUEST AGAIN❤️❤️❤️❤️💘💘💘💘

[a-court-of-fics-and-errors]

Keep Moving Forwards, Part 42

The painting above is "Goodnight Hug," created by one of my favorite artists, Mary Cassatt. This piece is part of her renowned "Mother and Child" series, which includes a variety of paintings, pastels, and prints exploring the intimate and tender relationships between mothers and their children. These works are among her most celebrated and significant contributions to the art world.

Cassatt, Mary. Goodnight Hug. 1890. The New Yorker, 22 Mar. 1999, www.newyorker.com/magazine/1999/03/22/cassatts-children. Accessed June 28, 2024.

Azriel x Reader Fic

Summary: After finally deciding to leave your abusive and manipulative mate for good, you find unexpected companionship with Azriel, the Shadowsinger of the Night Court. As you navigate the aftermath of your traumatic relationship, you struggle to understand where the mating bond went wrong and contemplate your path forward, vowing never to return to the past.

Find other parts here: Master List

To follow this fic, follow tag "Keep Moving Forwards Fic" or comment to be tagged in future parts.

Content Warning: This story contains depictions of extreme emotional manipulation and abuse, detailed descriptions of direct physical abuse, and scenes of men hunting women with implied sexual assault. Please read at your own risk.

Word Count: 5.2K

Author's Note: This is a multi-part series. Unlike my previous works, this fanfiction delves deeper than just fluff, exploring complex emotional landscapes. As I navigate this new writing journey, I kindly ask for gentle feedback. The topics addressed are profoundly impactful, touching many lives with diverse experiences. Please be gentle with yourselves and others. Healing is a journey, and everyone processes it differently. Be kind to yourself. Take what resonates, and leave what doesn’t.

Please continue reading, being aware of the above content warnings, ensuring you are in a healthy headspace. Give yourself time to process and be gentle with yourself.

The gentle warmth of the April sun caressed your face as you reclined on the Townhouse balcony. You had taken it upon yourself to fill every inch of open space with a plethora of plants, each one showing off its first blossoms. Your prized purple hyacinths thrived and were now in full bloom, their fragrance filling the air.

The creak of the door handle alerted you to someone's approach, but you didn't bother turning around. At this early hour, there was only one possible person - Azriel, returning from his intense training session with Cassian. His strong hands landed on your shoulders in a comforting squeeze as he leaned down to press a soft kiss to the top of your head. "Good morning," he murmured against your hair.

You turned to face him, smiling up at him. "Morning!"

Azriel settled onto the chaise lounge beside yours, still dressed in his training leathers. His ebony curls were slicked back, held in place by beads of sweat glistening on his forehead. He stretched out his wings behind him, basking in the warm sunlight. With a slight lean, he unbuckled his shin pads and tossed them aside with a clatter. Then, he extended one arm towards you, silently asking for help removing his vambrace. As you carefully unlatched it, your fingers traced over the red marks left imprinted on his skin from the tight straps.

“You know, you probably don’t need to pull them that tight,” you remarked as you threw the leather straps onto the ground. Azriel flung his other arm over to you in response.

“I also don’t need them sliding down when Cassian is actively trying to stab me with a broadsword,” he quipped back with a playful smirk.

As the second piece came free in your hands, you scrunched your face in concentration and shrugged. With a clang, the brace fell to the ground as you leaned back in your chaise, closing your eyes to bask in the warm sun on your face. Azriel pulled back his arm, running his hands over the damp, sweaty skin that had been trapped by the armor. The two of you sat in peaceful silence for a few minutes before you broke it with a question.

“Good session?”

“It was fine,” Azriel responded nonchalantly.

“Anything worth noting?”

Azriel let out a slight chuckle before answering, “I’m probably going to have a nasty bruise on my back tomorrow. Cassian whacked me pretty hard with that practice sword.”

You turned your head to face him, one eye opening while the other stayed shut against the brightness of the sun. “Need me to take a look?”

Azriel shook his head, “Nothing to see. Just a red mark right now.”

“Did you hit him back?” You asked, turning back to soak up more rays.

“Oh yeah. He’ll have a bruise of his own. Probably a couple,” Azriel replied, a hint of satisfaction in his voice.

“Well, as long as you evened the playing field,” you concluded with a smile.

The warm rays of the sun kissed your skin, drawing out a contented sigh from you. After a long and harsh winter, the people of Velaris were finally basking in the glorious sunlight. From balconies to parks to the sidewalks, everyone seemed to be seeking out its gentle embrace.

"Did you just get up?" Azriel's smooth voice interrupted your peaceful thoughts.

You shifted in your chair, feeling the ache from sitting in the same position for too long. "Probably an hour ago," you replied tiredly.

Azriel chuckled at your disheveled appearance. "An hour awake and still in your pajamas," he teased.

You shot him a glare, but couldn't help the small smile that tugged at your lips. The male was sprawled across the chaise like a lazy cat, his wings spread open behind him.

"I have nowhere to be," you retorted, turning back towards the sun.

"Laziness," Azriel playfully scolded.

"Hey now," you countered, "I see no reason to get dressed when there's no one to impress."

Azriel opened one eye and smirked at you. "You used to wear such beautiful dresses when we first got together."

"And you used to shower after training sessions before coming to see me," you reminded him with a laugh. "We've both gotten too comfortable with each other."

Azriel let out a deep chuckle from his chest. "You started it when you asked me to check on that red mark on your ass."

You scoffed, "Who else was I going to ask? You're down there often enough."

"Oh trust me," Azriel said with a sly grin, "your face-down-ass-up position is definitely a turn on for me. But when you asked me if the red dot on your butt looked infected and then made me touch it...well, let's just say I've never been more flaccid in my life."

Your eyes widened as you turned to face him. "You brought it up!" you accused, trying to imitate his deep voice. "You said, 'Hey, you have another nipple on your butt.'"

"I was just letting you know," Azriel defended himself with a chuckle. "It's not like you could see it!"

You couldn't hold back your laughter, the sound ringing out like music. "But seriously," you asked in sincerity, "did it go away?"

Azriel turned his head to look at you, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Let me see and I'll tell you," he replied with a wink.

"Oh," you raised an eyebrow, your voice taking on a playful tone, "so my body ailments are a turn on for you?"

"And just like that," Azriel sighed dramatically, "you ruined it." He leaned back and closed his eyes again, a smirk resting on his cheeks.

—

You stood in the elegant foyer of Whispering Haven, the first apartment complex you had built specifically for pleasure makers. The walls were adorned with parchment paper, filled with colorful scribbles and drawings from the children who called this place home. The front hall was a chaotic mess of abandoned toys, like a battlefield of stuffed animals and dolls. You smiled warmly as two little girls came bounding down the stairs on wooden stick horses, their laughter echoing through the space. Titania, the manager of Whispering Haven, called out to them with a mix of amusement and exasperation. "Bryn and Oriel, when one of you comes tumbling down those stairs, don't come crying to me with those big tears! If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times, don’t be running on those steps!"

You chuckled lightly at her words. She turned back to you, slightly out of breath as she pulled a pen out of her red bun.

"I swear those two will be the death of me. Alright, where were we?" She asked, glancing down at the book in your hands.

"So we have seven new applications for housing," you began, dragging your finger down the list. "Three of them are single mothers with young children, one is a single father with his son who just turned thirty, and the remaining three are single women."

"We ain't got the space to take on all four here right now," Titania sighed.

You furrowed your brow in thought. "Is anyone planning on moving out soon?"

She shrugged. "Meliora mentioned something about wanting to move into something more permanent on her own in the next few months, but she's been saying that since she got here."

"I could check in with Relon over at the other house," you suggested. "She might have availability to take on at least one or two."

"If the single females are willing to have roommates, I could take on two of them," Titania offered.

With a heavy sigh, you closed the book in your hands and slowly looked around the room. The realization that you had somehow made this place come to life hit you like a ton of bricks. "I'll make some inquiries," you murmured to

yourself, trying to center your thoughts. Suddenly, Titania's voice broke through your trance.

"How you doing doll?" she asked, her ruby red lips already stained with lipstick.

"What?" you replied, raising your eyebrows as you turned to face her.

She smirked at you, "I feel like I ain't seen you in a while."

You shrugged and let out a small laugh, "We see each other like three times a week."

"Yeah, but I mean actually talk to you. Not just about this stuff" She gestured to the room around you.

You smiled sheepishly at her, "I know, I know. I'm sorry."

Titania reached out and ran a bony hand down your arm, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "It's alright, love," she said kindly. "You have time for a cuppa?" Her eyes lit up with excitement at the thought.

Taking a deep breath, you nodded. In reality, you had about seven other things on your to-do list for today, but Titania was right - you had been so caught up in everything that you hadn't made time to actually see her. You followed her down the hallway and past the stairs into the large industrial-sized kitchen. With fourteen females and two males with children, as well as two single males living under one roof, the kitchen had to be massive. As you walked in, you saw Bryn and Oriel perched under the kitchen table, their stick horses tied to the counter handle as if it were a hitching post. They were giggling and playing together happily. Titania's heels clicked against the floor as she made her way to the stove, flicking on the burner and placing a kettle on top. You reached up to grab two mismatched tea cups from the cupboard. Each one was donated from a different store or restaurant in the city, but somehow it all came together to create a charming and eclectic collection. After all, no one living in the house matched each other either.

With a surge of courage, Oriel emerged from under the table and scurried over to Titania, her tiny hands tugging on the silk of her dress. Titania turned to look at her with surprise. "May I be of assistance, ma'am?" She asked incredulously.

"Could I have a snack," Oriel whispered eagerly.

Titania's eyes widened in shock. "A snack?" She exclaimed loudly. "But didn't I just feed you and Bryn lunch not even an hour ago?"

Oriel giggled mischievously, her eyes sparkling. "Yes, but I'm hungry again."

"No, no ma'am, I didn't just feed you for my own enjoyment," Titania scolded gently. "I distinctly remember you saying that you were too full to finish your sprouts."

"But now I'm hungry again," Oriel insisted, swaying back and forth on her heels and toes.

Titania rolled her eyes and placed her red tipped hands on her hips. "What am I going to do with you?" She muttered in exasperation.

Oriel simply laughed as Bryn crawled out from under the table to join her friend. "Bryn wants some too," Oriel announced proudly.

You had heard about Bryn, the nearly forty-year-old child who had never spoken a word to anyone. Some said it was because she had learned to stay quiet when her mother was soliciting males. Others believed she just couldn’t speak at all. It broke your heart to think of such a shy and isolated soul trapped in her own mind. But Oriel seemed unfazed by it all - in fact, she talked enough for both herself and Bryn. And despite their differences, Oriel was fiercely protective of Bryn. You had seen on more than one occasion Oriel straddling a boy twice her size, tiny fists wailing down on them after they had been bullying Bryn.

"Of course she does" Titania replied, looking down at the two happy, albeit dirty, faces. She glanced between them before sighing and turning to the cabinet, retrieving two wafer cookies from a jar. "Now if I give you these, will you promise to eat all of your dinner tonight?" She held the treats just out of reach from their eager hands.

The two girls nodded eagerly, bouncing up on their toes.

"I mean it, Bryn. All of your beans," Titania warned sternly. Bryn nodded in agreement. "I don't want your mothers coming to me later saying you didn't finish your dinner."

The girls promised to remember and Titania handed over the cookies with a smile. They scampered off happily as Titania called after them, "And don't go telling any of the other children that I gave you snacks. I don't want to spend the rest of my day playing snack dispenser." But the girls were already out of earshot, giggling and sharing their treats. Titania let out an exasperated sigh, her vibrant eyes rolling as she deftly plucked a wafer cookie from the plate and popped it into her mouth. She turned to face you, gracefully sinking into the plush chair across the long dining room table. The fragrance of freshly brewed tea lingered in the air, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of comfort wash over you. Titania poured the steaming water into two waiting cups, the gentle clinking of porcelain filling the quiet room.

"So," she began, stirring a spoonful of sugar into her tea. "How have you been?"

You cradled your warm cup in your hands, letting the steam rise up and envelop your face. "Busy," you replied with a small smile. "But good."

Titania's warm smile mirrored yours as she took a sip from her cup. You couldn't help but marvel at how she never seemed to burn her tongue despite never waiting for her tea to cool. "And you and that guard?" she asked, raising a perfectly groomed brow.

With a roll of your eyes, you corrected her. "He's not a guard. He's the spymaster."

A mischievous glint appeared in Titania's eyes as she teased, "As long as he wears those tight pants, he can call himself whatever he wants."

You couldn't hold back a soft chuckle as you took a sip of your own drink. "He's very skilled at his job."

"I didn't ask about his skills," Titania clarified with an amused smirk. "I asked about the two of you. But if you want to share about the skills he has feel free." Titania winked at you.

Peering up at her through your lashes, you responded coyly, "We're doing well."

"How well?" Titania leaned an elbow on the table, resting her chin in her palm.

"Very well." You arched an eyebrow playfully.

Titania grinned at you and cocked her head. "And he takes good care of you?"

You couldn't help but smile at the thought of your partner. "Very much so."

"And do you feel safe?" Titania inquired, her tone soft and caring. "With him?"

You nodded emphatically, a sense of security washing over you. "Absolutely."

"I'm glad to hear that, my dear." Titania reached across the table and squeezed your hand affectionately.

“What about you?” You asked. “How are things?”

Titania scoffed and motioned around the room, “This is how things are.” You laughed lightly. “I have a roof over my head, a belly full of food and for the first time, no odd rashes in my nether regions.”

After you had opened the first apartment complex, you had offered Titania the position of manager in hopes of getting her out of Pleasure Making. It was clear that the physical toll of the business was taking its toll on her aging body. Although hesitant at first, she eventually accepted the offer and now managed the complex full-time. And now, seeing her in this new role, you couldn't help but feel proud of her.

“I’m glad,” you sighed contentedly, smiling at her.

Her gaze drifted up to your forehead and she clicked her tongue disapprovingly. “What about your mate?” she inquired, pointing to your head. “Still causing trouble?”

You looked upward as if searching for an answer within your own mind. “Not as much,” you admitted. “I think I’ve finally learned how to block him out or maybe he’s just getting quieter.” You shrugged. “Regardless, I’ll take it.”

“Good,” Titania nodded approvingly, leaning back into her chair. “I’m glad to hear that.” She fell silent for a moment before asking tentatively, “And what about finding him? Have there been any leads?”

You shook your head sadly. Azriel had done everything in his power to locate Caelum and bring him to justice for Kai's murder, but the elusive male seemed to have vanished without a trace. You could only hope that he was far away or suffering in some dark, lonely cavern. "

“I'm sorry,” Titania said with genuine sympathy, her expression hardening at the mention of Caelum.

You shrugged nonchalantly, trying to brush off the weight of the past. “It doesn't matter anymore,” you confessed. “I'm happy where I am now.”

Titania's smile softened into one of understanding. “The best revenge is not letting him affect you.”

“I don't even care about revenge,” you admitted, shaking your head as you stared into your steaming cup of tea. “I'm just grateful for where I am now.”

You couldn't bring yourself to tell Titania about Philip and the truth behind his identity. Part of you didn't want to know if she had been aware all along, and another part wanted to hold onto the blissful ignorance of pretending she didn't know. Perhaps one day, if the opportunity presented itself, you would ask her. But for now, it was enough to bask in the happiness of the present.

“Titania,” you continued, “can I ask you something?”

The female across from you peered up from her cup which she placed back onto the saucer with a clink. “Of course.” She said, but her tone was slightly incredulous.

You weren't sure where this question came from, but it tumbled out of your mouth before you could stop it

“If you could have done any other career, what would you have chosen?”

A faint furrow appeared between Titania's brows as she chuckled softly. The question was absurd, and you knew it. Titania had never had the luxury of considering other options for her life. Every day was a battle for survival, a constant struggle for safety. But now, in the presence of a strong woman who had overcome her circumstances and built a fulfilling life for herself, you couldn't help but wonder if she ever allowed herself to imagine the "what if's" of life. She sucked her teeth, her eyes not meeting yours. “I don’t know.” She said shrugging lightly, leaning back in her chair and crossing her bony arms.

You leaned forwards, “Anything, just if you could choose anything else."

Titania let out a sigh and gazed up at the ceiling as she considered your question. Did she envision herself in these alternate realities? Or did she simply imagine someone else living the life she wished she could have had? "My life wasn't unhappy," she offered finally, meeting your eyes again.

You were taken aback by her response and worried that you may have offended her. But before you could apologize, she raised a hand to stop you. "I had a very full life," she continued, reminiscing on all the experiences that made her life worth living. "I traveled, saw the world - or as much of it as I wanted to. I met wonderful fae, experienced life, ate good food, read good books."

You smiled at the contentment in her voice. Perhaps you had underestimated her struggle and discounted her as someone who was merely suffering through the world, not as someone who built herself around it.

"Life wasn't easy," she added with a hint of defiance in her tone, "and it certainly hasn't been handed to me. But if there was one thing I could have tried that I didn't get the chance to, I would have loved to be an actress." She nodded confidently, folding her hands in her lap.

You smiled lightly at her as she recounted everything that made her life so full. Perhaps you had discounted her as someone who was suffering.

“Life wasn’t easy. It certainly hasn’t been handed to me, and I don’t expect it to start being fair now.” She continued. “But I think if there was anything I could have tried that I didn’t get the chance to I would have loved to be an actress. “ She nodded, contently, her hands folding into her lap.

You tried to keep your jaw from falling to the floor. It made sense, with Titania’s eccentricities, her overall demeanor and command of a room. She was most certainly a personality fit for the stage. But to think of her, prancing around, wearing costumes and reciting lines someone else had written for her, you couldn't help but let out a small laugh, trying to hide it behind your hand. But Titania's scowl made it clear that you hadn't done a very convincing job.

She shook her head and sighed exasperatedly. "Oh alright," she said with a hint of annoyance in her voice. "Go ahead and make fun of me."

Your laughter bubbled up again and you apologized through tears of mirth.

"It's okay," Titania dismissed your apologies with a wave of her hand, a small smile playing at the corners of her lips. "I know what you see when you look at poor old washed up Titania – no way could she ever be an actress." She shook her head and chuckled softly.

You managed to calm yourself down enough to speak without wheezing from laughter. "No, no," you reassured her with a wide grin. "That's not what I meant at all." You stifled another round of giggles before continuing, "I just never would have expected you to say that."

Her eyes widened, “Well what did you expect?”

You also didn’t have an answer to that question, perhaps you should have had one ready before you asked her it, but any answer she might have given you seemed absurd. She was Titania, the enchantress of pleasure and desire. Her aura exuded confidence and power, and no one dared to argue with her. She was fully and unapologetically herself.

But you searched for a label that would encapsulate her essence - something professional, rewarding, poised. “I don’t know.” You shrugged, trying to come up with an answer on the spot. “Healer?”

Titania rolled her eyes at your suggestion. “Sure.” She said incredulously.

“I’m serious!” You insisted, determined to justify it. “You’re empathetic, kind, you care for people.”

“That could also fit into thirty other professions.” She raised a sharp brow in amusement at your attempts.

“I know, but…” You searched for a better description, your eyes darting around the sparsely decorated room. The soft glow of candlelight danced on the walls, casting shadows that seemed to mimic the ebb and flow of conversation. “You always made me feel safe.” Titania’s expression softened slightly, her gaze meeting yours with understanding.

Her presence alone was enough to calm your racing heart and ease your worries. It was as if she had a special power, a way of soothing even the most troubled souls. You couldn't help but admire her for it. "You always knew how to get children to settle," you continued, "ways to get them to understand without words."

Titania let out a small laugh and rolled her eyes, "Let’s be honest, at this point, you've raised more than enough children and fought through more than enough childhood illnesses," you joked, trying to lighten the mood. "You should have a healers degree by now."

Titania let out a small laugh and scoffed at you, but as she returned her gaze to you there was an unmistakable warmth behind it that made you feel at ease. She always had that way about her, making you feel like everything would be okay no matter what. “Losing you was one of the biggest heartbreaks I’d ever felt,” she said softly.

You tried to keep yourself from looking astonished. This sudden shift, this sudden flood of emotions from Titania was unusual for her, but you just held her gaze, silently urging her to continue.

“You were so full of life. Every day you woke up ready to take on the world and announced that you were going to be a force within it.” She chuckled lightly, shaking her head in amazement. “I’d never seen a child with so much to give.” She averted her gaze to the table, where her fingers traced patterns on the dark wood surface.

“I think that was because I had you.” You offered softly.

But Titania didn't look at you, simply shaking her head with a small smile. "No, that kind of spirit isn't something you learn," she said with certainty. "You came to me like that. Just full of reasons to live, even despite what you had been put through."

You couldn't help but smile at her words, your gaze following her fingers as they continued to trace the patterns on the table. “I wish I could have grown up with you,” you whispered softly, feeling a small fire of anger for not having had more time with her.

Titania lifted her eyes to you, a sorrowful expression etched on her face. The lines of her brow deepened as she gazed at you with a certain intensity. "I don't," she said softly, her voice unwavering.

You met her own gaze as she continued. “You deserved more than the life I could give you.”

You shook your head no, but as you did, one of those long bony hands reached out to you, grasping yours. “I wouldn’t have let you live the life your mother had. Or I had.” Her touch was surprisingly gentle as her thumb traced your hand lightly. “I think that if your mother had continued on the road she had, without taking you away, you would have seen things your tiny heart couldn’t have handled. I think…” she paused, “I think that it would have been selfish for me to make her stay knowing how it would have hurt you.” You felt a rock forming in your throat as she continued, shaking her head. “It broke my heart when you left, but I think your mother knew that there was nothing left for you here. Nothing that would help you.”

You shrugged, your voice breaking slightly as you filled in the pieces she was missing. “I don’t know if it was much better after she took me.” Titania’s eyes shifted to yours, “I don’t remember much after we left.” You shrugged, “Just bits and pieces with her. I remember a lot more from when I was living with you.” You wondered silently if it was because the child who lived those moments couldn’t handle the memories of what happened to her in those woods, in those early years when it was just your mother and you. Perhaps it was the only way to keep you from falling apart. Perhaps your mind kept you safe by forgetting.

“But I do remember her crying a lot. I remember when we finally made it to the little village we lived in she would just spend days in bed, just sobbing.” You continued, Titania’s hand squeezed yours.

“I guess that’s the withdrawals she was going through?” You shrugged, “But I just remember crawling into bed with her and just crying with her. For days and days. But at some point I stopped crying, and I would just lay there with her, listening.”

Titania’s fingers began running along your hand again, but your gaze was empty as you searched through the small memories you had. “I think that the other villagers that there was something wrong, but it was such an isolated community that most everyone just kept to themselves. They all had their own issues that no one had the time to come knocking on the door of a stranger.” You shook your head, “But one of the only clear memories I have was leaving the cabin after a few days, when we hard run out of food.” Your eyes narrowed as you tried to pull back those images, “I remember going into the woods and finding some berries to help the ache, but they must have been poisonous because I just got so sick afterwards. But I remember going to another cabin, when I got better, and knocking on the door. This other female opened it, looking exhausted and overwhelmed with five children surrounding her.”

You laughed lightly at the image of this tired, disheveled female, not much older than your mother swinging open the door. Her eyes purpled underneath as three small children played at her feet, one of them whining and barely hanging from the hem of her dress while and a baby strapped to her chest, also screaming.

"I must have looked close to death because she immediately brought me inside and sat me down.” You shook your head, brow furrowing as you dug deeper, “The cabin was so small. I think there was only one bed in the whole place.” You chuckled. “It was tiny, I mean tiny. Only one room which was just covered in clothing and dirty pans and pots. And the children, gods the children they just whined like they had limitless amounts of breath in their lungs.”

Titania laughed, “As they do.”

You continued on, “I remember she offered me a biscuit.” You nodded as the picture continued to paint itself, “Yeah, she did. And she kept having to swat away the other children who kept trying to take it from me.” Perhaps they were hungry too, you thought. “But I wouldn’t eat it in front of her. I just kept telling her I had to take it back to my mother.”

Titania’s focused was solely on you, even as a small child ran in through the back door, squealing and screaming, clanging pans together as they exited. It seemed as though her only world was you.

“I don’t know how it happened,” you continued, “But I remember taking the female to our cabin. And the other children came with. And I remember she brought a basket of some food. I can’t imagine she had much to spare though.” It was a small basket, you recalled, with barely more than some slices of hardened bread and a few pieces of jerky. “She told me to wait outside with her children who were only slightly more civilized than feral. And she gave us a biscuit to share, which the other children immediately stole and ate. But she went inside, and was in there for a while.” It felt like an eternity, but as a child, five minutes felt like hours so you weren’t fully sure how long the female was inside with your mother. “But when she came back out, she was holding my mother up by her arm.” You felt your eyes go glassy. “She looked so pale in the sunlight. And she was so skinny. And her eyes were just,” you own eyes widened, “just bloodshot.”

You felt Titania gulp.

“But the female looked at me and smiled and she told me everything was going to be okay now. She said that she was going to help us” You let out a breathy smile, shaking your head. “I don’t know what she said to mama. But she seemed to change after that. She still had her bad days, and I remember her just being more quickly angry, but she actually started living again.”

You paused, blinking, sifting through memories that had disappeared from you. Titania interrupted your thoughts, “Do you remember what happened to the female?”

You flicked your eyes up to her, “I know she came to the house once a week, with her flock of rowdy children in tow,” you laughed, Titania did as well, “And I guess she was checking to make sure we were both still alive.”

“Did you know her name?” Titania asked.

You pursed your lips, shaking your head, “No,” you said, your voice hollowed, “I don’t remember it.”

Looking back on the memory as an adult you were now aware how much that female had done for you, for your mother. In a world that had been so cruel to the both of you, this one female, with almost nothing of her own, shared her food, clothing, blankets with you. You recalled how in winters when it was even too cold for the small wood stove to warm your cabin, your mother and yourself would go to her cabin, crawl into that too small bed with her children and herself and sleep with each others body heat being the only warmth. And now you couldn’t remember her name, and that brought a pang of guilt through your stomach.

“When did your mother leave?” Titania asked.

You shook yourself from the feeling of sadness that wormed into your belly. “I wasn’t that old. Maybe a little over ninety?” You offered.

“So you were with Caelum and his family for a while then.” Titania stated more than asked.

You nodded. “His mother took me under her wing.” You shrugged. “Until Caelum and I secured the mating bond.” Those memories, that small happiness when you felt a sense of family felt poisoned by knowing what came next.

Titania smiled at you, with a sincerity that warmed your heart. “You are raised by the world, doll.”

You shook your head, “No, I’m raised by those who know The Mother is cruel, and decide to ignore her.”

Titania chuckled, “What does she know?” Titania teased, her hand gripping yours tightly, “She’s just some bitch who hasn’t seen the world.”

To my readers, I miss my mom so this was more for me than anyone else: @thatacotargirl @mcuamericaa @lilah-asteria @florabelll @fightmedraco @marvelbros-oneshots @mariahoedt @quinzzelx @romantasyreader28 @minnieoo @mysteriouslydeafeningwerewolf @annabethgranger123 @krowiathemythologynerd @scatteredstardustt @caroline-books @sleepylunarwolf @slytherintaco @sevikas-whore @sidthedollface2 @acourtofbatboydreams @quiettuba @julesofvolterra @skylaralchemist @darling006 @loglady00 @caninne @weepingwerewolf @that-one-bibliophole

[mostowa]

Castle's Charm

So finally, after almost 4 months (The Olympic Games and an enormous life change) I finished binging Castle. And well, yeah, I'm late to the party like 7 to 10 years or something, but I was still hype'ing and loving the journey. And now I think this is one of the best series I've ever watched. Here is the list of reasons. It's gonna be tl;dr, as always!

Thanks @makeitastrength for making me do this ;)

Castle/Beckett dynamic is absolutely timeless. It has Darcy/Lizzy's initial disdain turning into respect and trust, it has Sherlock/John-level crime solving and mutual understanding, it has Meredith/Derek's drama and my beloved Chenford's level undercurrent emotions. And so much more!

There is something unique about them, too. This is one of the most important things that I learned from the series. It's the simple fact, that one can make annoyance a love language. I absolutely love how much childish Castle can be and how much Kate just... lets him be one, without giving up her own boundaries. You can be annoyed at your partner and secretely love that about him/her. Kate Beckett, thank you for showing me how to stand my partner's dad jokes. Or just really really bad jokes.

There is no doubt that the series is about those two (and it's a little bit of a shame for me, I'll explain further). And what made it very enjoyable for me was the fact that I've never doubted they are endgame. Their love and fact that they like each other very much was never in doubt on my side (except for the beginning of course). Even at their worst moments I was sure they will find a way to each other. I kind of wish it was the same with Lucy and Tim. Because, well, that made me continue to wanting to watch Castle, despite Rick being an absolute 5-year-old ass sometimes ;)

Someone here on Tumblr wrote that great series is not about will they do it as it's always about "how they do it" - without breaking major relationships apart etc. Castle is a great example for that and I had that in almost every episode. Pretty much no MCD and it still kept me on edge of my seat for most of the drama!

Castle will be my ultimate reason for the fact that I love watching series in which characters like each other. Be it The Good Place or The Rookie or Castle, I always love exploring relationships and different kind of -ships, where there is very little cheap miscommunication drama and where characters grow without sacrifacing each other. This is one of the best examples. Both for Castle/Becket, Castle/Alexis, Castle/Mom, Ryan/Esposito, Esposito/Lanie, name any relationship there, honestly.

I wish Kevin Ryan had more storylines. Because this Irish undercover episode was one of the best in the whole series with Kevin taking unexpected (but very much in-character) risks and used relationship he created to strengthen himself. I think Kevin is my favorite character, despite being underwritten for like 95% of the time. :D

I wish all Ryan and Esposito and Alexis and Lanie got more storylines. They were wonderful characters ready to be explored and while I understand the characteristics of the show was to explore Castle/Beckett, but sometimes it was just tiring :)

I absolutely loved the concept of the show with repetitive episodes and funny episodes and serious episodes and then (mid)season finales blowing our minds off. The Rookie kind of repeats the same pattern, but short seasons don't really work with that.

It was great how they made the series set in New York by different problems and storylines. I loved all mentions of Broadway, all cases connected to sometimes very crazy things connected to this one-of-a-kind city. And let me just say at the end that my favorite episode was the Old Haunt one. It made me realise how sentiment is a strong part of my husband's personality and how it can be a really lovable and charming thing.

Well yeah. Kudos if you made it that far. And if you did, let me know if you agree :)

[longlivedelusion]

A Moment's Peace

An Orym x Ashton fic.

Summary: Orym didn't expect for this to happen, for these kinds of feelings to come back after Will. Guilt ridden, he looks to find some time alone. Except... He's not alone at all.

Warnings: Spoilers up until EP like 65 ish. Hurt/Comfort/Fluff. Mention of a lost loved one, and fear of abandonment and some self-deprication stuff ya know.

A/N: I wrote this last year and completely forgot it, but it's one of my favorite things I've written in recent years. Yet, it's just sat in my notes, waiting to be continued but never did. Or something? Anyways, I'm fully on board with Dorym and Callowmoore, but this was my first ship ever of Campaign 3 before I knew about EXU or anything.

I just love them two, and my heart will always have a soft spot for early days with the two of them. This pairing to me is like two opposites who've lived very different experiences, yet fit in ways that are unexpected. Fill in gaps where the other might falter. And I love that. Ok enough from me!

Enjoy🤍

Masterlist

Orym remembers when it started. The small buds of feelings that began to sprout, slowly growing into a blossom that became too big for him to ignore.

He spent most of his days running around Exandria with the rest of the Hells, and a lot of it meant running towards a new lead or when they were sent to gods know where without much of a choice. So in the moments that they were able to properly rest and settle, even just for an evening, were welcome. And it's here where he began to notice the shift.

He spent a lot of these evenings doing the Zeph'aeratam, laughing with the others, meditating. Those moments were his favorite. 

In those simple moments, he could breathe and remember. Remember so deeply and vividly that he swears he could almost touch his lost love, he was so alive. In his mind he could talk to Will, tell him about his days, his worries, his anger. He could feel a little less alone.

But one day he realized he spoke about someone a little more than others. Where memories of the last day or week were reflected from a point of view that limited its vision to a singular person. Over time, that person became as much part of his meditations as much as Will.

He felt... guilt, truth be told. He always believed in multiple loves and has known this to be true for some, but for him it was always just Will. Always would be.

So when this new friend began to shape and mold into something different in his heart, he felt a guilt towards his husband. Towards himself, despite how wonderful it felt to not be so alone. But their friendship was still new in many ways, still so uncertain despite everything they'd been through.

So as he made his way just a few feet outside camp to do his nightly meditations, the group did as they normally did.

Chetney, attempting to show his alpha prowess to Fearne, Fearne focused intently on some new earrings Laudna wore, Laudna gazing at Imogen as she always did, while Imogen chatted with FCG and Ashton about some new mind travel magic he still didn't really understand.

Orym didn't notice the eyes that shifted toward his back as he made his into the nearby grove.

Settling into a quiet corner under a large oak, none of the local critters seemed to be bothered as he settled his back against the rough tree bark—breathing. Just as he always did.

It took him little time to ease into his meditation, his mind focused and drifting to his favorite destination in meditations. The edge of a beautiful cliff overlooking the Zephrah landscape as his Will sat with his feet over the edge.

"Hi." Orym said, sideling up close beside his husband, immediately nuzzling under his arm and into his chest, "Missed you."

Will shifted his arm around him like he'd always done, grabbing his hand and laying a ghost of a kiss on it, "Missed you. So how's things?"

"Yeah, they're ok. Imogen's having a bit of a rough time right now, but honestly we all kind of are. Things are getting bigger than any of us thought they were gonna be." He looked at their hands, noticing the ways they didn't quite touch.

"The most important things always are. But you've got a good group with you from what you've told me, and honestly? I know you. You're capable of spinning anything on it's heels enough to get rightside again," Will looked down at him and winked. "You did it enough times for me."

Orym shoved into Will's side, giving a little laugh, "Yeah, well—"

"This is kinda nice," said a new voice, a familiar one, their familiar boots coming into view out the corner of his eye. Will sat there, a smile still on his face as the figure sat beside Orym. The voice came in clearer and more echoed than he's used to in here though. "Can see why you step away every night to do your mind, body meditation things."

Orym looked over at Will, the world around them fading slightly, the sounds of crickets becoming louder and louder.

"Go," he heard Will say, echoed. A smile on his lips, "It's ok."

"But—" Orym starts.

"It's alright. We have forever ahead of us. I don't mind sharing you in some of that." He leans down to leave a ghost of a kiss on Orym's forehead before his edges faded, Zephrah shifting out and now leaving him with deep blues and purples of the night sky. He sees the oak trees, the smell of fresh dew on the leaves with a hint of earthy moss poking at his senses, before sensing the strong presence at his side.

"Sorry if I messed up your vibe or flow or whatever," Ashton says fully clear now, a little more nervously than he's usually heard from him. "I just thought maybe I could practice the whole meditating thing some more since I hadn't done it since, you know, the thrown across the world thing. If that's alright." 

"Oh. Yeah, of course." Orym shifts a bit to turn towards Ashton, body now faced towards them. His hands a little more damp then when he started his meditation. "Just sit comfortably first, and we can start taking some deep breaths. I'll guide you." 

"Cool, yeah. Thanks," Ashton says, shifting a bit uncomfortably at first before settling against the tree only a few inches away from Orym. They close their eyes.

"Alright, so we're going to do what the Air Ashari call Ríth'im breathing. It's a simple breathing technique that's easy to follow and should help you relax a bit."  Orym says before starting to inhale, "Like this: 2, 3, 4, hold. Exhale 2, 3, 4, hold. And we'll keep doing that for a few minutes."

Ashton was jittery at first, their body not quite being able to stifle the habitual movement it tended to do on the daily. But after a couple of breaths they actually managed to slow down a bit. 

"Ok, imagine time slowing, 3, 4, and the sounds of the grove becoming a little less each time you take a breath. Hold." Orym watching the genasi, their chest rising and falling with each count as time began slowing down for him a bit.

It was rare that Orym got to see Ashton like this. Not off moving somewhere or doing something, massaging a hurting muscle or just in a constant go, go, go. The only times he's ever gotten to really look at them are the nights they're out here and he's on watch while the rest of the troop is asleep. Not that he watches them while they sleep, he's just insanely aware of everything almost all the time. Especially when he needs to be. That's why.

So to see their usual creased brow soften, to see even the slightest dip in their shoulders, was rare. 

"Now imagine you're somewhere you like being, somewhere you find safe. Maybe a private grove like this or Krook House or-"

"The Spire by Fire?" They said, a smile smile curving up their lips, their voice quieter than usual but still loud enough to unsettle some of the surrounding creatures.

Orym softly chuckled, "The Spire by Fire is perfect. Just make sure you're alone at first so you can focus easier."

"Alright."

Orym guides another round of breathing before settling in again, "Here is where you can kind of sit away from everything and connect to yourself. It's like having a private moment but with your mind."

Ashton tenses a bit, "It's a bit wild up here, I don't know if private 'lone time with it is the smartest thing."

Orym notices their tensing, "It's alright for it be scary at first. Being alone with your thoughts when you're not used to it can be really terrifying. But nothing as terrifying as going through lava I imagine."

A chuckle in response, "Yeah, you're probably right." Silence. "I guess I'm just worried that the more I find out about myself, the more it'll just confirm how broken I actually am. And I don't know if I need to confirm that shit any more than I already have. Fuck, I don't know."

Orym moves to touch Ashton on their knee before remembering the pain they usually feel, choosing to return their hand to their lap instead. 

"You can touch me ya know. It's alright. Hurts but I can handle it." Ashton's eyes still closed as he speaks.

Orym's eyes widen, "How did you know I was about to touch you?"

They shrugged, their body slowing returning to their natural, jittery state. "Didn't. Could just feel you in a way, I dunno. Like I felt it even though it wasn't necessarily there."

"Well, regardless, not sure if touch is the most welcome thing right now if you're trying to relax." Orym shifts a bit, starting to move away.

A stone hand moves to grab his wrist, gentle for something made of stone, as crystal eyes now staring back at him, "It's really alright. It's more calming actually, at least when it's you." He looks down at his hand and his face shifts, as if just realizing the intimacy of the moment. He starts to shake it off before...

Orym reaches back for their stone skin, moving the hand up and sandwiching it between his own. He looks at Ashton. "Yeah, well, I'm glad to be of assistance then." A smile.

A smirk is returned before Ashton looks away, not moving their newly entrapped hand, "Looks like this meditation thing still isn't really working for me anyways, not sure if I can ever really sit still unless I'm drunk or unconscious or something."

Orym gives their hand a small squeeze, "It's not easy the first few times, hell even the first dozen. But with practice—"

"Says the guy who wakes up doing pushing ups." Ashton says, "Not sure I'm made of the same stuff."

Orym knew this type of talk from Ashton well, the self-deprication subtle but always a little present in the way they speak, "You're made of exactly what you need to be. You're perfect." He grew more serious. "Don't let a broken world tell you you're anything else. Because you're—" He stops himself. "You just have to find out what works for you." 

Ashton's leg began to jitter, a small ripple in a still lake. They didn't say anything or look at him, still staring off into the trees like a million thoughts were running through his mind.

"Tell me," Orym gentle squeezes their hand again. "You don't have to let it stew up there by itself you know. I can take some of the weight."

A long silence. Orym almost thought Ashton wasn't going to speak again until he heard a deep sigh come from the genasi, their eyes closing a moment before looking at something nondescript ahead.

"I'm not good at this kind of stuff and even if I do trust somebody its not the kind of trust you have outside a fight or anything ya know? I can trust somebody to make sure my back won't get blasted but when it comes to feelings? Fuck, I don't know."  Ashton looks down at his newly formed lava carved arm. "And things just keep getting crazier and crazier and I don't know if it's gonna stop. And I'm fucking scared that I'll just keep getting more messed up to the point where nobody can be around me without getting hurt. Cause I hurt, and I'm damn good at it."

Orym just looks to Ashton, not speaking, trying not to break their flow.

"And that would've been perfect for me a few months ago cause if you're good at hitting, then jobs tend to pay better that way. But then y'all came along and—"

The blossom grew firmer roots inside Orym's chest.

"Now... Now I'm worried about if one day I'll go too far and I won't just hurt the bad guys but that I'll hurt the others. That I'll hurt you." Ashton's eyes turned to face Orym at last. "I don't wanna fuck this up. I can't fuck this up."

Orym waited for Ashton to keep going or to do something, but a moment passed. Two. Before he finally spoke, "You're not the only one who can mess up. Who has messed up." Orym's tone softens. "But the thing about caring about other people is you choose to stick by them through the good and bad. We all make mistakes, some of them worse than others, but Ashton I choose to stand by you while you learn, just like I hope you'll stick by me the same."

Ashton scoffs a bit, rolling their eyes, "Yeah, well you say that now but who really actually stays? I think you believe that, but then I'll fucking say something stupid or do something stupid and then you'll go." Despite their stone cold look, Orym could see the fear in Ashton's eyes.

Orym stands, dropping Ashton's hand to the floor and moving to stand in front of the genasi now. He cups their face, noticing the tense and confused features before touching their forehead to his own, "I will stand by you Ashton Greymoore, for as long as life grants me time on this plane. You are my friend and I will stick by you for as long as you want me."

Ashton looked to Orym for a moment, deep apprehension in their eyes but also something more. Hope. They before sighing and reaching out to grab one of the hands on their face, "Well shit, I guess you'll be stuck with me for a long time then. Think you can handle that?"

Orym smiles. "Yeah. I think I'll be just fine."

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

What interests me most in Quaritch’s and Spider’s relationship is The Tragedy. Quaritch is an asshole who wants to kill Na’vi but he also has nothing else going for him, so he does what he’s told because without the mission he has no purpose. Spider is a kid who was neglected by EVERYBODY and never had an adult care for him. Then BOOM, they meet and are forced to work together. The movie had not given them a lot of screen time but the fact that Spider felt safe enough around the recoms to crack jokes and be playful says a lot. The scene where he teaches Miles Na’vi and puts a hand on his knee, unafraid of physical contact also shows that they’ve grown quite close in the past months.

And then Quaritch fucks it up. He goes back into his old ways and only cuts corners out of fear that Spider will hate him until the end of days, but he already does so because after months of camping out in the forest and having their Disney found family arc, the poor kid is confronted with the fact that his not-dad-dad had not changed in any way that matters. The only thing that changed about Q is the fact that he now has one (1) person he cares about. Spider got taken away from his home, somehow experienced what it was like to be loved (even if said love was the bare minimum) and then was brutally reminded that the person who loves him is an actual demon.

In the end, a happy ending was never meant to be. They are enemies, and could never support the other’s cause and yet they still love one another, and they fucking hate that they love one another, which is my favorite part. In separate interviews, both Slang and Jack had confirmed that both characters have a mighty soft spot for one another, even if they resent it. The bond they have built is there and not Spider, nor Quaritch can shake it off.

I've let this sit in my asks for a while now cause I knew I would get fired up. Yeah from the get go in your post you are already being extremely charitable to Quaritch in a way that sits really poorly with me.

-"Quaritch has nothing else going for him if he's not fulfilling his mission and killing Na'vi." I don't understand where you guys fabricate this tragic past for Quartich from, in the first movie he literally says he chose to extend his tour on Pandora because of his hatred for the Na'vi. He was going back to Earth, where who knows who was waiting for him? Saying he has no family or friends is entirely made up, especially when we know he had a girlfriend and a child at the time.

-"They were forced to work together" HUGE fucking reach dude. Spider is sure forced to work for Quaritch. But Quaritch kidnapped him, took him as a prisoner of war, brought him to be tortured for informatin, uses him as a forced teacher and translator as he burns down and threatens civilian villages. These are all decisions he makes intentionally (not forced!) and are all fun little war crimes.

-I think calling Spider playful around the recoms for that one scene where he mocks Quaritch's Na'vi is rather crazy. Saying they've grown quite close, that they've had a 'Disney family arc,' I really hope you are really young and you'll mature. YOU CAN'T DEVELOP A GOOD AND HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE UNDER DURESS. Spider is a prisoner! The entire time! Any relationship basis is stockholm syndrome, because every interaction is colored with the fact that any of the recoms, Quaritch, could hurt him or kill him at any time. They could take him back to be tortured. He can't do what he wants. He cannot leave. So every action that isn't harmful feels ten times better because he knows it COULD BE and might be at any second. It's why the cycle of abuse is so powerful, when the norm is pain, kindness feels so unexpected and undeserved. It's really harmful to paint these relationships as good.

-"Quaritch has changed because now he has someone he cares about." Well fuck me, I guess Spider didn't matter when he god damn existed in the 2009 movie??

-The bond that is built is a toxic one based on abuse and manipulation. It's stockholm syndrome, it's lima syndrome. It will definitely be interesting, but you are right about that one thing: it will never work out.

[pastelsalmonsworld]

My personal timeline as a multi shipper

Here’s my controversial MHA (I know I know) ship timeline. I see a pattern of simply liking a ship because the two characters had an interesting interaction or exclusive to Izuocha, where Ochako can only likes Izuku. This is in order by timeline. I want to to spread this to show people that you are not hated by 100% of a group of anybody. We are all multi-faceted beings. My ships are based on interesting dynamics not canon-ness thereby superiority. This list is based on a timeline, not my interest.

‘Shipping’ in my case is simply enjoying the characters in a fanart or fa fiction outside of canon which is deemed more than is needed to understand the charcters. Support romantic or otherwise fanart with mainly two characters basically. It doesn’t even mean I see how they would be together in canon. Before bakudeku, I read most of these at the same time. I felt I had to have one ship only at some points too which isn’t true.

Maybe shipping for me is just liking an aspect of a story.

Izuocha. I liked this ship because it seemed like it was going to be obviously canon. I enjoy a lot of canon-ships like NaruHina, KanaTanjiro or just about any of my favorite shoujo and boys love pairings. Also a few spare girls love comics too; cute! I just thought that’s how it was. First friend and supportive and obvious.

Kacchako. I enjoyed their fight in the Sports Festival arc of mha because Katsuki didn’t hold back. I agreed with most of the crowd, he’s /kind of/ insane in how he acts at his point in the series. I fully believed he would go Sasuke or Villain route in this part of the series. I liked that he didn’t treat her differently because she’s a girl despite his intentions. Ochako put up her best fight and found something new in herself that she hadn’t before; the wit and quick thinking to fight back against a super strong unrestrained Enemy. I ended up seeing a BEAUTIFUL fanart of him sitting at a desk and Ochako sitting at a wind that was amazingly rendered. I read a lot of— let’s just say extremely out of pocket fan fiction about this rare pair. I felt insecure about this ship because it got made fun of online. Also Bakugo’s ‘nothing frail about her’ comments in the relationship connection extras. Regardless, interesting, fun, imaginative, unexpected.

KiriBaku. This seems to be the mostly widely /accepted/ ship in my opinion. I feel like it has the most support in the American fandom. Kiri was super popular at the time I joined my hero and I was deep in the weeb-tok era of 2019 through 2021(anyone else miss the “Iwa-Chan, kageyama!/ I know that I’m gonna slaughter dis” sound? And OH the cosplays). MAN I miss it it was so fun and less dodgy than boring-ass takes and blind fighting on twitter. I was a bakudeku hater at this time because I blindly believed the death threats were true. I didn’t hate the ship personally feel deep down but I thought actual death threats would’ve been too far. I often dumped mean and repetitive comments on anti-bakudeku tiktoks. I really enjoyed an actor au where the author switched the moha characters to playing their Japanese voice actors. Baku go/okamoto really wanted to play a canon gay character in the drama they were actors in but Izuku got it first which caused his continued resentment of izuku because he assumed he was not gay. It was really fun and some of the fics were very memorable and wholesome. Good times! At the transition between these two ships the fandom was all happy and the fanfics were funny and Bakugou was being supportive of his friends in his own way at this point.

Bakudeku. The plot twist of the century. But, not really. See, I hated bakudeku mostly because I wanted to fit in with the popular opinion and simple “they hate each other!!”. In order to seem normal and not insane since it was so hated. Again, I already thought bakugo’s character because it humanizes a bully in a realistic way. I usually live for those crazy ass villains anyway; it’s just anime. Death Note??? But obviously, I never would have put Bakugou in Izuku together. Rewatching season 1 that shot was terrible as fuck and heart wrenching and I feel so bad again after watching and I can see why I absolutely hated Katsuki when I watched mha. I can see why people still hate him. Again, I started looking at the fanart out of spite and saw a lot of fanart with one of them looking at the other back and watching them from behind. It’s really true to the series. It is so heart wrenching to watch and read. That’s why I like reading it. I’ve read SOO many fics where either of them die mostly Izuku, because of the suicide comment, but eventually with the event of black whip, mostly Katsuki for obvious reasons. There’s a deep theme of saving and winning and even the horror of death when you love someone so obviously I was captivated. Some fics, and I mean A LOT, basically predicted word for word the hospital scenes. I don’t like ‘I know your secret power’ tropes, but it’s there. There’s just so much between them it’s crazy. The way /The Way You Used To by: edema ruh/ has like the exact hospital scenes that LATER!!!! Happened in the manga… the death, the emotional power-ups, the connection of a separate soulmate ( ‘nother person in your body thing like the vestiges) quirk, PLUS ofa transactions inspired by two heros that canonically seem like they’re about to happen. You’ve got the Volume cover and everything to show for it too. Themes of almost Spider-Man and Gwen???? I rewatched Spider-Man 2 and it’s like huh??? And also Izuku is inspired by spider-man as well? Oh SHIT, is bakugo Izuku’s failed save? I’m gonna be SO FUCKINNG MAD if that happens, but I’m one of those people who enjoys angst a lot at the same time and I will appreciate it. I’m so everything for this ship for this ship platonic friendship or not I may just ship their friendship

TodoIIda. Usually, I don’t find a lot of my ships seeming canon except for this one. I already know that any important relationship or friendship between characters can be shipped but since they aren’t seen interacting on screen much next to the scene where iida saves him instead of going ahead, it really stuck. That must have been Horikoshi’s intention because he came back to them recently like they matter to each other. I JUST remembered the stain arc and how IIda and Shouto’s can relate on wanting revenge. Iida’s motto to help someone anywhere any time relates to Todoroki’s helplessness as a child. They’re important to each other. Friends, family.

Togachako. I didn’t consider this a ‘ship’ per se until recently, but I was obsessed with how Toga wanted become Ochako and the people she loves also how they like the same boy I guess?? Izuku seems oblivious and somehow even unrelated to their relationship even though it started it. There was this one cosplay tiktok with a poppy sound on it and I was OB- SESSED. I told you I love me some crazy simpy villains and Toga is just that. Unexpected was how Ochako starts to focus on her specifically and want to save her. I was NOTTT expecting her to say she was jealous of her smile. I was so sad when Himi said she didn’t want to talk to Chako anymore so I was PUMPED to hear people spreading the misleading togacjako canon on twitter. Toga biromantic/sapphic vampire whose blood-sucking is like kissing, is getting blood from ochsko for the rest of her life. I don’t know if toga really cares anymore. I also enjoy their possible relationship to Yuki-onna. Would love if something came out of them in canon, though I just realized toga explicated said she wanted to go out with Izuku so why can’t she do it for ochako?

dabihawks. I was SO confused why people shipped this when they barely showed their interactions. I only realized when a mostly canon style fan manga dubbed did a dabihawks comic. I then realized they are are almost the same childhood reflections of each other, neglected, abused by their parents

As an end note, I learned that every ship dynamic has to be romantic, but usually it is because of recent fan culture. I’m 15 but I know a lot about older fandom because I was an avid Kaichou Wa Maid Sama fan and used the less popular fan fiction.net. People are a lot nicer on fanfixtion sites than on social media sites, I’ve learned also older fandoms didn’t get massively hated on like MHA does. There’s just more people in the world who watch now. Remember to be yourself because there’s always someone feeling just like you out there, I promise. Chaio;3

[70s-show-diary]

I had a thought about your tags in the post about Hyde's gift giving but didn't have the writer brain-space to turn it into a longer character analysis post. However, without having any of the BTS details like script notes or writers testimonies, I have to disagree that Hyde being a thoughtful gift-giver would be an accidental character note. He highly values being noticed and provided for, coming from a background where he was overlooked, left, and made to fend for himself. Trying to avoid my very personal bias for the character himself, I also just feel that from the effort made to paint him as the Pigpen-type character from the start of the show, it's something they would have planned to add in- having him be unusually perceptive and/or emotionally mature as an unexpected juxtaposition to his neglected rough-and-tumble persona Not to assert that anything beyond the first season of T7S was planned out in such a mastermind way, but I just have to disagree that Hyde's gift giving is an accidental thing that fell into his character instead of deeply reflecting many things that are core to why he's the character we have

Hi! I’m so glad you shared your thoughts with me! I love talking about this kind of stuff.

I can understand why my tags from this post that you are referring to may make it seem like I don’t think any of Hyde’s complex characterization was intentional by the show runners/writers of T7S. I tend to use the tags not only for organizational purposes, but for ‘throw away’ comments as well - the kind of things I wouldn’t want to ‘permanently’ include in the body of the post for the very reason that the comment is usually a bit tangential to the main purpose of the post. But tags are not the greatest place to fully-flesh out a character analysis, which can maybe cause some confusion.

And so that is why I appreciate you sending this ask because it gives me a chance to clarify the actual meaning behind that tag here in this post:

First - putting my own personal bias for the character aside as well, I completely agree with you that Hyde’s perceptiveness and emotional maturity absolutely juxtaposes nicely with his neglected rough-and-tumble persona (I love these words for describing Hyde btw; it’s so spot on). It makes for a well-rounded, complex, and engaging character, as opposed to the two-dimensional stereotyped ‘burnout’ he is on the surface.

I’m not saying that I think that some of these aspects of Hyde’s character/persona was not intentional by the minds behind the character (show-runners, writers, etc.), but I just tend to believe that it’s the fans of the show, particularly those of us involved in fandom and fanfic, that are primarily responsible for fleshing out these more nuanced aspects of Hyde’s character and persona. Not to be overtly cynical, but I think that there are minds here in the T7S fandom that have given significantly more objective thought and consideration to Hyde’s character than the show runners did.

But like you said, without having been in the writer’s room, there’s really no way to know exactly how much of Hyde’s complex characterization was intentional. I could very easily be wrong. If Hyde’s personal and thoughtful gift-giving was planned out and intentional, then kudos to the the show runners/writers because Steven Hyde is hands down one of the most interesting and complex characters I’ve encountered in media, especially considering that T7S is a sitcom.

And I have to give the writers/show runners some credit - after all, That ‘70s Show is my favorite TV show. But my passion for the show has been made considerably more enjoyable and enriching by the minds in the fandom.

TLDR; I’m of the mind that the show runners/writers planted the seeds, but it was the fandom that nurtured and grew those seeds into a garden that continues to flourish 25 years later.

Anyone else have any thoughts?

[thatseventiesbitch]

What do you think led Donna to date Casey? S4 was a memorable season but not my favorite because of Donna. I always thought the reason why Donna decided to date Casey was that she was going through some things during this season (i.e. her parents separation, Eric decided to date again) and because of that she needed someone to lean on and thought Casey was perhaps the guy. What really struck me was that Donna always saw herself as independent and a feminist but her poor judgment as well as the events that happened in S4 may have led her to date Casey who is the type of guy she always thought she never liked.

Thanks for the ask!

Personally, no, I do not think Donna chose to date Casey because she thought he would be a good person to lean on and would give her the kind of support she needed during a difficult time in her life. I think that... gives her way too much credit. 😂

Donna was resistant to start dating again. Jackie was the one who set her up with Casey for the first time in S4xE16 "Donna Dates A Kelso" - pretty much against her wishes - but when he shows up Donna is clearly attracted to him and decides to give it a go. On their first date Donna tries to talk to him about what's going on in her life, and here's how that goes:

Donna: Thanks. This is fun. I've been spending, like, way too much time worrying about my mom and stuff. Casey: Hey I learned something in the army. When things are tough turn up the music and crack open another beer. Donna: Yeah you mean, like, things will eventually get better? Casey: I don't know about that. But if they don't, at least you'll have a beer.

So what's sad is that she was looking for that emotional support, for someone to help her process what she was going through at home, but she didn't get it from Casey like she probably would've from Eric. Casey's not that guy. I think Donna's vulnerable and impressionable here, she's taken in by a handsome older man and his charms, and she's looking for a quick way to feel better. Which is exactly what Casey's offering.

And then I think Donna's decision to keep seeing Casey was compounded by the fact that it clearly bothered Eric. He was trying to twist the knife, make her feel jealous with the 'Most Eligible Viking' thing (in a later episode she admits that 'it like, broke my heart' when Eric said he wanted to officially start dating other people), and so she does it back. And it's a lot more effective.

I understand your frustration with Donna during her Casey Kelso phase. It really wasn't her at her best - but as we all know, there were a lot of extenuating circumstances for Donna that season and she was 17 years old at the time, so that tempers a lot of it for me. I enjoyed the unexpected call-back to it in That '90s Show, where she seems to admit as much to her daughter, too. 😂

[galathogwarts]

The Stars Will Always Shine Here ✰ Chapter 4: Favorite Person✰

Also on ao3

Chapters Masterlist

Before this chapters a few quick things I wanted to adress:

A huge thank you to @misszalonia for proofreading and fixing so many of my mistakes so this fanfic will actually have sentences that make sense. I will forever be grateful for the help <3

My apologizes I haven't update in a very long time, I was sick the past week and did not have much time or energy to work on the story.

This chapter is all about the fluff, but next chapter will have a bit more action.

I would love to read what you think. Please leave a comment if you can, your feedback is really important to me!

That's all for now! Hope you enjoy this chapter :)

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

It was morning when Sebastian saw you skipping happily alongside him and Ominis. Sebastian could not understand how you were this energetic so early in the morning. He knew you had these strange bursts of energy in the most unexpected moments, but he was still baffled every time it happened. You were running up the stairs while he and Ominis trailed behind you, trying to keep up.

“Come on, you slowpokes! Look at the sunny beautiful day! Oh, I wish we could be outside right now!” You joined your hands together  as if saying a prayer. You turned sharply to them, almost hitting Sebastian with your hand. Fortunately, he ducked in time. “What’s with the faces? Where are your smiles?”

Ominis stared at you with his lips parted in confusion, while Sebastian just growled. “We don’t all have endless amounts of energy at this time of day.”

You chuckled, covering your mouth with your hand to hide it. “Come on, guys! Where are your smiles?”

Ominis cracked a smile, while Sebastian just groaned loudly. He was not a morning person, to say the least. Against his wishes though, he had the urge to smile when he saw you smiling. He resisted it though, not letting you enjoy the satisfaction of being able to make his mouth corner curl up at such an early hour. It was hard to resist though, but Sebastian was not one to lose in a fight so easily.

You stood closer to him, so close in fact, that he could see the iris of your eyes. He exhaled quickly, almost out of breath - as if he was running a marathon. Well, his heart was running a marathon almost every time you were around. But you were so close this time, he could barely control his heart rate. It is one of the many affects you had on him.

“Show me that smile!” You said, poking his shoulder with your wand. He knew you were not one to give up so quickly either. He looked into your eyes, and as always found comfort in them. He could stare at him all day, and he would if it was not making it too obvious he has feelings for you. He memorized your face everytime he looked at you, as if he was afraid that would be the last time he would have a chance to see it. From the way you smile, to the shape of your nose, to the way you squint your eyes at him … he tried to memorize it all. 

But he would never let it show, he was smarter than that. He could not be that selfish. So instead of telling you how beautiful he thinks you are, he just rolled his eyes. “How are you so energetic?”

You shrugged and smiled, the kind of genuine big smile that had you flashing your teeth. “I slept well tonight, no nightmares.”

Peace filled his body upon hearing it. He knew the nightmares were very rough on you. He felt so powerless that he could not help you. It reminded him of the feeling he felt when Anne got sick. You were always in good-spirit before, and it was nice seeing you like that again. He was so happy to hear you had one night of peace. He was a bit restless waiting for the weekend to explore the wizard’s house for his diary. As always though, the more you want something to come, the slower time goes on. 

However, the thought of spending a weekend to help you find the answer to those nightmares made him feel better.

“There is this smile.” You called excitedly, clapping your hands with a smug smile on your face. He realized just as you said it, that he had in fact smiled. Of course you had that affect on him, you were the only one who could get him off-guard and lose. He did not like to lose though. A playful smile appeared on his lips as he stood behind you, putting a hand around your mouth as if kidnapping you. “You have lost your talking privilege.”

You said something that was hummed by Sebastian’s hand on your mouth.

“I can’t understand you.” He vocalized in your ear.

He saw you blushing as you held his arm and removed it from your mouth, turning your body to face him again. 

“That is cheating, Sebastian.” You said with a scolding voice, but the playful smile broke the illusion that you were serious. 

He smirked. “I never said I play fairly.”

“Ominis! We shall punish him!” You mimicked the voice of a royal.

Ominis laughed. “How do you reckon we should?”

Sebastian gasped, faking a hurt response and put a hand on his heart. “I feel betrayed, by my own people!”

You laughed as you entered potion class. 

“Garreth!” You called when you saw the ginger boy, hovering over the potion station you shared. You stood next to him and started chatting. Sebastian tried not to let it get to him. You are allowed to talk with other guys. He just wished you would have done it less enthusiastically. Definitely not with that prick.

Control yourself, Sebastian. He thought to himself. He tried to organize his station to get ready for class, determined to not lift his gaze and look at you. But it was stronger than him, and he kept looking at you. I mean, she is allowed to talk with Garreth. He is also allowed to talk to her as well, laugh at what she is saying, playfully touch her arm-

Playfully touch her arm?! Sebastian's entire body stiffened. Get your filthy claws off of her Weasel-boy.

Ominis let out a soft sigh, as he turned his head in the direction of his friend. Though Ominis could not see, he was a very observant guy. More observant than Sebastian ever was, in fact. “What is it now?”

Sebastian did not move his gaze away from you, who was now jumping up and down. He saw you saying something excitedly to Garreth, who in return smiled widely at you. He has no right to feel this angry, so why is he feeling that way? Only you could make him go from smiling like an idiot to getting angry like a boy who did not get the toy he wanted. 

“Nothing.” Sebastian muttered bitterly, rolling the sleeves of his robe aggressively. He took a few breaths trying to calm himself. His emotions always got the better of him, but he was not going to let that ruin your friendship. He had to be strong, and learn to calm himself. 

“I know you are lying.” Said Ominis, smirking knowingly. Of course he knows, he has been Sebastian’s best friend since he could remember. Sebastian did not even have to be in the same room with Ominis for Ominis to know how he feels. It was comforting and annoying at the same time.

Sebastian sighed in defeat and turned to Ominis, abandoning the task of organizing his station. “Why is she letting idiots touch her? I mean, she should be very careful. You never know the intention behind their empty heads; it could be very dangerous.”

Ominis snorted, knowing there is much more that Sebastian is not saying. “Sure, it’s her safety you are worried about.”

“I shall let you know I put my friend's safety as a high priority.” 

Ominis hummed. “Sure you do. And it has nothing to do with the fact that the guy who is touching her isn’t you?”

“No.” He said sharply, and too quickly to be honest. “She can touch you.”

Ominis snorted. “That is because you know we are friends and nothing more.”

It was true, but he was not going to admit that. When they became close, Sebastian got jealous at first at how you had a charm over Ominis. He was scared you were falling for each other. He knew if Ominis liked you, he might have to back off for his friend. He did care about Ominis more than he cared for himself. However, after a few conversations with both of you, he got the idea that your closeness was more like siblings. He had a thought you might see him as a brother, but it was too bothersome and depressing. Therefore,he took an oath to never think like that again.

He was still looking at you, and he noticed when something Garreth had cut splashed into your scarf, staining it. You had a shocked expression, lips parted slightly, but then Garreth whispered something in your ear which made you choke on a laugh. Garreth was about to take off his scarf, probably wanting to wrap it around your neck.

That is it. He thought. He stomped over to where the pair was standing. He promised himself he would control his emotions but this was very hard to watch. When he reached the two of you, his annoyed expression turned into a tender smile as he looked into your eyes.

“Seb, hey!” You said, turning to him with the smile he was sure will be the end of him one day. It is as if your smile was stronger than any charm he had ever learned in charms class. It was like water on a dry day, like the sun in the middle of the winter. He knew every time he looked at you that he would do anything to make you keep smiling.

Without a word, he took off your dirty scarf and put it aside on the table. He then unwrapped the scarf from his neck and put it around yours. 

“Are you a child? How did you get your scarf to be so messy?” He could not help but tease you. Your reactions were usually priceless. But at this moment, it was the wrong thing to ask, because you and Garreth exchanged knowing looks, smiling one at another.

Sebastian rolled his eyes, before fixing his gaze on Garreth. “And you, shouldn’t you be a gentleman and make sure she is not hurt?”

You chuckled and looked into his eyes. “Seb, I’m not hurt.”

“Lucky for him.” Sebastian muttered under his breath.

“What?” Asked Garreth.

“Nothing. Just don’t ruin this scarf, it is my favorite.” Said Sebastian with a teasing smile.

“Oh, then you can take it, Seb! I don’t want to ruin it. You know how messy I am during potion making.” You smiled shyly.

He could not help but beam at the thought of you having things caught up in your hair all the time and your face covered in different. You always managed to get messy and dirty during potions class, and he always wondered how it was even possible. You were a disaster while making potions. A very cute, adorable, charming disaster.

He took a step closer and fixed the green scarf around your neck, pushing some strands of hair behind your shoulder. “But it looks really good on you, I would hate to ruin your dashing appearance.”

He sealed his words with a wink, which caused you to blush deeply. You opened your mouth to say something, before closing it again. Just the reaction I was hoping for.

“You can wear my scarf!” Offered Garreth. Sebastian forgot for a minute he was still here. That was a good minute. “I don’t mind if it gets a little dirty.”

Sebastian shot him an annoyed look. “Weasley, use your eyes. She has a scarf around her neck, doesn’t she?”

“Yes she does.” Said Garreth, taking a step closer, as if trying to challenge Sebastian. How ridiculous of you, Weasley, to try and challenge one of the top duelists in this school. “But if she is going to spend the entire class worrying about getting it dirty, maybe she should not wear it.”

Sebastian felt rage filling his body, and his face was now turning from annoyed to angry. “And who are you to tell her what she should or shouldn’t do?”

You stood between them. They were both towering over you with how tall they were, but your presence affected them both.

“Enough! I don’t need a scarf. I am fine, really. So stop, both of you.” You said with a stern voice, about to take the scarf off of your neck when Sebastian placed his hand on yours.

“Keep it, really. It is yours, for good.”

You gasped. “Didn’t you say it was your favorite scarf?”

He smiled charmingly at you. Time for the punchline, Sebastian. He ducked a little and whispered in your ear “It is. But you are my favorite person, so it only fits.”

And then he casually went back to his potion station. He dared to look back behind his shoulder, seeing your gaze following him and red spots appearing on your cheeks.

Good luck topping that, Weasley. He thought happily while a smug smile appeared on his lips.

You are my favorite person.

You squealed and giggled to yourself. You felt like a fool, but people always said people who are in love are fools. How could he say that in one breath? Did he realize the effect it had on you? You knew you should not get too excited. Sebastian was a smooth talker, it was in his nature. But you could not help but feel all giddy and happy as he said those words. You replayed the words and these very moments almost all day long, finding comfort and happiness in the memory of his touch, his words, his scarf. 

You thought of how Sebastian carefully wrapped his scarf around your neck, his freckles shining on his cheeks. You stared at his mouth as he smiled at you, making you wish you could just smash your lips against his. The entire class you smiled to yourself like a fool. The smell of Sebastian's scarf distracted you which resulted in you accidentally stirring your potion too much. His scarf smelled like his cologne, and there was something very comforting about it. You remembered the whisper in your ear that made shivers run down your spine.

“Has she gone mad at last? What is with her?” Imelda asked Poppy, who just shrugged.

You were sitting in the library and were supposed to go over your divination homework, but you could not focus at all. You had other things in your head. More exciting and comforting things than homework.

“I’m his favorite person.” You said dreamingly and laid your head on the table. “He said it himself. Me!”

“Who did?” Asked Imelda, raising an eyebrow. She looked at you, than at Poppy, than back at you.

“Sebastian.” You said his name with a happy sigh, as if it was the sweetest thing in the world. “He gave me his scarf and said I’m his favorite person.”

“As one does, at some point in life.” Snorted Imelda and kept writing something on her parchment. 

You lifted your head in sharp movement and looked between the two girls. “I think I could die of happiness. Can people die of happiness?”

“Did you have a firewhiskey? Why are you acting like a drunk?” Imelda examined you and chuckled, clearly baffled by your strange behavior.

“It’s love she is drunk on.” Said Poppy with a laugh, and playfully hit your arm.

“Ew.” Said Imelda with disgust and shook her head, as if to show she it against the idea of love.

“Don’t ew her! As if you don’t stare at Amit the entire charm class.” Teased Poppy. It was nice to see Imelda being teased instead of being the teasing one.

You chuckled. “That’s right, Imelda. I was wondering when one of us would bring it up.”

“I did not stare at him,” she said with a sigh. “I just examined him for research.”

“About human anatomy?” Asked Poppy, smirking. You and Poppy exchanged looks and giggled.

Imelda blushed. “If you tell a soul, I would make sure you will get involved in a mysterious broom accident.”

“You like Amit!” You exclaimed, clasping your hands together. “That is wonderful.”

“It is not wonderful!” Imelda said bitterly. “It is distracting. His image keeps appearing in my head at random times during the day; and I keep wanting to see him smile. It is tiresome.”

“It is romantic!” You said excitedly, definitely understanding what she is talking about. Sebastian appeared in your thoughts quite often, that he was a permanent resident there. 

Imelda mumbled something you could not hear clearly, but you were quite sure what you heard was “Well, that too.”

[renrenlady]

Ranking Shaperaverse Songs from Worst to Best Within Their Album

First up:

24- Voodoopunk

Listen. I have listened to every single one of Paul’s albums. I’ve hunted each and every one down and listened to the ones I could get my grubby hands on. I’m very familiar with his work and his musical habits (he has a very particular set of trademarks ie: symbol crash to end a song, repetitive word/lyric use throughout albums to create a through line, etc) but one thing that just does not resonate, does not vibe with me are these very long winded instrumental songs interspersed with singing. I’m a huge lyric person, so I definitely have a bias and it’s not that the music itself is bad, but this song is always gonna be a skip for me. I’m just not gonna sit and listen to pretty much the same thing over and over again, although I would LOVE to see this performed live. I think it would be incredibly fun, but from a listening standpoint, there are much better songs on this album.

23- Edgar Builds a Business

There’s gotta be a worst and best, and unfortunately this lands on the former side of that scale. Despite me absolutely loving Kate coming in with the connective tissue, the central theme of the show (really, all of Paul’s shows if you think about it) “circles never stop themselves” it isn’t enough to get past the extremely repetitiveness of the song. One could make the argument that, because we are heading for a more industrious/business era it’s only natural for the song to be repetitive and maybe even a little boring. One could also argue that because Edgar is such a boring little evil incel bitch, perhaps he’s meant to have such a tedious song. Whatever the case may be, it has a lot of verses, lots of instrumental breaks and it usually also gets a skip, unless I’m listening for lore purposes. I have to admit that the second to last verse where he addresses the issue he has with Silof is my favorite part of the song, it really lets us peak into his head after the break up and is almost the epitome of his evil if not for the last verse/conversation he has with a recently divorced Fay over dinner. (Side note- I absolutely love the headcanon that Silof is Amelia’s father. I don’t know if that’s canon or been made canon, but it’s absolutely delicious and makes DoNA a complete circle with no loose ends.)

22- New Albion 3

The lesser out of the four. While it does tie up some storylines (or ties them up from the perspective of a first time listener) and it does have a humor to it, it’s extremely transitional and it shows. You might be thinking ‘well no shit it’s transitional that’s literally what the song does’ but when I say it shows, I mean that you can just feel Paul really wanted to write this song and be done with it. It falls into the unfortunate section of not being the last one as most of us in the western world are very used to a ‘rule of threes’ way of things. Particularly stories. But I did say it had humor and it ending abruptly with the sentient plant’s story coming to a close is some unexpected humor I enjoyed. (Also is the plant a post human? Did I read that right on the wiki? Is the fucking plant able to control reality? Somebody tell me, please.)

21- The Movement 2

So. The thing is I don’t think I like gen 3 all that much. It’s still interesting and Byron and Amelia are fascinating characters- also Jasper gets to really shine in this act! But it definitely has the more instrumental, bring me to church kind of songs. We get an interesting advancement of understanding the character dynamics with Amelia fully admitting to loving Byron who is never gonna love her back, but it just doesn’t make up for the repetitiveness of this song. Much like New Albion 3, I think this entire act suffers from not being the last to go, it feels very transitional despite it being arguably one of the most important acts due to the founding building blocks of Radio Hour being done within it.

20- The Movement 1

Much of the same critique of the one above this, but I will say what gives it more of an edge is the reestablishment of Edgar’s ‘business theme’ where Byron uses it for campaigning. It’s a bit of musicality that I really enjoy from Paul, connecting the characters through motif and parallelism. Byron hates his dad so god damn much, and yet still employs the same tactics he used when he was a young man looking for a purpose. McAllisters don’t fall too far from their tree huh?

19- Annabel Has a Doll

The origin of Kate’s ‘circles never stop themselves’ motif and it’s haunting beautiful when you go back and listen through. It essentially sets up the theme of every album following the first and is, what I think, the central part of what Paul is trying to convey. I could get into the philosophy behind his work for hours, like make a whole video essay on it but for now- this song. It’s on the lower end due to the fact that even though it is a hilariously frantic and manic bop, it can get really grating after the third verse. Like getting hit by a hammer over and over again with the constant and loud and insistent melody. Like I said, there has to be a worse and best, and I just think there are better songs on this album. Oh also- the beginnings of the Elysium theme? Fucking brilliant.

18- We Bid the 1st Generation Adieu

This is a brilliant way to introduce the concept of time jumping and also not getting too attached to the characters we see. It’s exposition without it feeling like exposition and Kate is always a delight to hear. It’s just that it’s a very short, transitional song and it’s. Yeah. That’s kind of it. We bid adieu to this review and move on to the next.

17- Bonfire of the Dolls

This song is a doozy in the best way possible. The climax of gen 3 and it completely delivers after creating such a delicious amount of tension between the living, the dead, and those who stand in between them. It’s the culmination of a society finally ready to snap and it is displayed so beautifully through a kick ass score that evokes such a frightening kind of emotion. A mixture of fear and pain and loss and somehow, love. Byron calling for Jasper in a desperate attempt at saving the one thing he only truly selfishly cared about gives me chills every time I listen to it. What this song suffers from however is the large amount of instrumentation. Don’t get me wrong, it sounds very good and the way Paul creates the ‘screaming doll’ sounds is so incredibly cool. But this would definitely benefit from having a visual element which is a problem I see across pretty much all the albums. Now that I call it a problem, I feel as though it’s a harsh word to use. I think it’s more like the show doesn’t need such long musical breaks if it’s never going to be staged. Still have the breaks, but perhaps shorten them? My mind can only supply so much imagination before I’m just replaying moments over and over again in my head.

16- The Ballad of the Gambler and the Monk

Full disclaimer I think this song is a fucking bop. I think it’s a certified, fun to sing along to jam. I love how this is the interlude of the story, reminding us of how exactly we got to this point of societal collapse by showing us how everyone was doomed from the start essentially. The music too has this old, nostalgic feeling to it which makes you feel like you’re being transported back to somewhere else, away from the chaos and the death and relentless evolution of New Albion. The only issue I have with this number is that for most of it, we already know the story due to it being explained to us. The opening lines of this show are telling us the story of the gambler and the monk. They only go more into detail about what happened at the end of the game, introducing us to the concept of reincarnation with incredible subtlety, but I really wish we had gotten more of a glimpse into just who these two were, and more importantly, who they were to each other. Now that’s a big wish considering it might’ve been difficult to have some establishment for these characters before Paul knew he was going to make Janissury, but some more detail to an already known story would’ve been nice considering a whole song was dedicated to it.

15- Edgar Gets His Heart Broken

Oh Edgar. Edgar you silly stupid bitch. You silly stupid bitch baby boy. Your song is objectively hilarious to listen to and I enjoy hearing your heart get broken every time. Although his incel anger does backfire on…well, New Albion for the rest of its existence, it was pretty funny watching it happen in a musical number. Lime pie//dying inside? Instant classic. Also the origin of the ‘one day you will learn’ theme and it’s honestly one of the best motifs Paul has ever written. It’s a perfect reprisal line and can be interpreted in so many ways, it just open to possibility. I don’t really have any critique for this one, it’s a concise and well paced story that gives us exactly what we need to know about gen 2 and it’s a bop. There are just better songs that come before this.

14- Annabel Raises the Dead

God damn does this song kick. These cats are cookin. When that piano/xylophone/I don’t even know what fuckin instrument barrels in with that tight ass arpeggio. The instrumentation is gorgeous, it’s evocative as all hell with its frantic nature and atmospheric sounds. The sole reason this isn’t further down on the list, is because I have this (most likely) singular issue with the actual notes themselves. Specifically the notes Annabel sings. Now, we’ve heard Laura Osnes sing, and I mean sing but what I can’t figure out is why despite everything being so incredibly frantic and high energy, are the notes she singing fall so…flat? And I don’t mean flat as in pitch I mean flat as in it just doesn’t match the energy. Annabel is a mad isolated scientist, why wouldn’t her melody line be an insane roller coaster? Why does it continue on in this sort of monotone way? It does get better at the end, with the bridge giving us insight into what the actual fuck is going on. But overall it leaves me wanting more in regards to a dynamic musical experience. Annabel’s part in the song holds the whole thing back with its sort of awkward melody where she’s singing these low, honestly uninteresting notes when the music is kicking all kinds of ass. Love this song, but I wish it was different.

13- Fay Considers Edgar's Proposal

Get his ASS Fay, make him eat shit. With his own musical motif of course. This song gives me chills when I listen to it, never a skip. For this entire time Fay has been living outside the main narrative, the sole reason why our easily corrupted protagonist gets…well, corrupted. To many, some may resent Fay in the beginning of gen 2 due to her somewhat vague couple sentences of break up. We have no context for how she feels or what her motivations are besides finding someone in a better financial/status position in life- but then this song comes on. Then we understand Fay really and truly did love Edgar. Filled with school-girlish, young love, Fay was head over heels. She fell in love with a young man who was most likely just as much in love with her. And during this song, Fay no longer sees that young man anymore. She feels betrayed, wondering how exactly she became a piece in Edgar McAllistair’s game of business and commerce. Wondering where the young man went and when he got shot out the back and replaced with the miserly and revenge ridden capitalist sitting before her, having taken everything from her. And then to top it all off with offering her late father? Her explosive ending is a stroke of genius and my only complaint is that this song is too short.

12- New Albion 4

This is the first instance of us hearing a more dieselpunk sound, the roots of Radio Hour beginning to grow into the cobbled ground of New Albion. It is haunting to listen to the second time around and frightening the first. Times are changing and by the sounds of it, for the worst it seems. Kate introduces us to a new kind of city and paints a very geometric and drab image in my mind where a dark cloud looms over a frightened and paranoid people. We are introduced to Soldier 7285 and the origin of one of the slappiest songs Paul has ever written, ‘the day we come’ motif. It is evocative of Javert from Les Mis, a solid and clear cutting tune that constantly comes in like a thick wall, impenetrable. You can basically hear the brainwashing going on and it’s honestly a great example of police/authority indoctrination. The words are empowering 7285, making him feel like he is justice, he is an important extension of the law and the law is just. It is unwavering. It’s an incredible piece of music and it was really difficult to decide to put it at twelve.

11- We Bid You All Adieu

There’s something about this number that breaks my heart in the best way possible. Like the way you felt when the children accidentally left Narnia or seeing Frodo Saul away to the Lands of the Undying. There’s still more story to be had, peoples lives still go on, but we are no longer viewers. The characters will live on as will we and…that’s that. The song is a perfect button finish to the mad and frightening escapades of the McAllistair family, bringing us not a sense of closure but drawing us in even more as to wonder what happens next in and to New Albion. I love the way it makes me feel, the only reason it falls here, just short of the top ten is because at this point we have heard this musical refrain many, many times and while that isn’t necessarily bad, repetition isn’t always the best choice, though perhaps in Paul’s case, the easiest when creating a new show every year.

10- The Suicide

Coming in at number ten we have our girl Amelia signing out! I have very similar thoughts to this as I did with Fay, getting the context of Amelia’s life is extremely heartbreaking. Also the discordant, chaotically violent way Paul displays abuse from a father is unfortunately accurate and phenomenal. Every time I listen I get so incredibly uncomfortable and displaced when that part comes and that to me is what makes this song a success. And then the twistingly sad nature of Elysium getting a reprise through Amelia’s epic goodbye to life just ties the whole thing together so neatly. Amelia is also a huge perpetrator, much like my blorbo Annabel in creating a chain reaction of events that will eventually lead to some crazy ass shit. I admire what this song contains and what it does.

9- New Albion 2

Full disclaimer, I love all of Kate’s parts and solos. I adore this one because of the charm we still have with this narration convention as well as development of the background characters! I want to hear more about the two women, the albatross Simon and the brilliant mouse Sam! It gives the city so much more life whereas the first one is an intro to help us build the world and the others lose a bit of charm after a while. This one I think is the most fun and I really enjoy listening for what are essentially clues/future callbacks for the future albums.

8- Priscilla Contemplates

I had no idea what Miss Priscilla was saying the first time around and if I didn’t take the time and effort to really listen to the words, this song probably would’ve been in the twenties. But after thinking it through and really tasting the words, I think this is one of the best poetically written songs Paul has ever wrote. It’s gorgeous in writing, describing such an odd and strange feeling from a girl who is living such an odd and strange life. And the way it ends with the phone call? Chills. Can you imagine being Jasper in that moment? This is a scene I would kill to see staged because of just how raw it can be. Priscilla is the best of the McAllistairs- as though reincarnation finally got it right this time.

7- The Day They Come

Not a ton to say about this one other than the fact that the rising panic is kick fucking ass to listen to. The way the music portrays Jasper and Priscilla arguing yet still desperately trying to be quiet. The inevitable way Soldier and the others are proudly and dutifully singing their vows. It’s short but it’s a riot, also RIP Byron and his trophy wife I’m pretty sure they die in this one if not died way before.

6- The Old Trunk in the Attic

I don’t know what the wide, general opinion is of this particular song but it, to me, absolutely belongs in the top ten. It’s strength is that it completely stands out from the rest of the discography. When Paul takes that moment to just create music from poetry, evoke feelings from us that we’ve never felt before. The delicate way the melody and instruments are done, the nostalgic yet unfamiliar list of items we all have a collective (but not real) memories of seeing going through our relatives belongings before. It’s what is a great representation of what makes the Shaperaverse so special. Just these moments of singularity, of importance when to the characters it’s just a Tuesday night. There’s so much gravity in this one song, I think we all forget just how much the rest of the discography relies on this specific moment- save of course for Annabel’s breakthrough. It’s beautifully sung by Kate and I put it on loop all the time.

5- Annabel's Lament

Humanizing our mad scientist with a ‘where did it all go wrong/how did I get here’ song is brilliant. One could argue it’s a verse too long, but to that I say the word ‘opera’ is in ‘pulp opera’ which is how Paul describes his works so. Yeah it sounds like a verse too long cause it’s opera. Anyway Annabel, like the logical thinker she is, lays the map of her life bare as she is finally ready to face the grotesque music she has composed entirely for herself. She’s trying to find the source, the answer as to why, why she cannot seem to escape this deep pit of loneliness she has been stuck in ever since her father set the high expectation of ‘be a success, then you’ll be happy’. And y’know what the crazy part is? I don’t even think she really figures it out in the end! Isn’t that wild? Yes she sets Jasper free because she loves him and on some level realizes his suffering- but the main reason she lets him go is because HE was supposed to be her success and, confoundingly, she still. Isn’t. Happy. Annabel doesn’t understand why this didn’t solve all her problems, why despite having worked for years and years, pushing everyone and every opportunity for social interaction away she still can’t get what she wants and this is the beauty of Paul Shapera’s works, but especially highlighted in his first. Annabel is trapped in a cycle, a circle. And the great tragedy is that she is the first act- there was no way her story was going to end happy. Instead she begins (or if you think about it, just another in a long line) a curse which takes four generations for her lineage to break. But the greatest tragedy of them all is that Annabel didn’t just curse her family tree, but the entirety of New Albion as well. Or perhaps- it was already cursed from its conception? I could keep going about Annabel and her lament, but overall this song feeds the story and lore part of my brain that is never satiated and the music has the intensity that I was looking for in Annabel Raises the Dead. It builds and builds until Annabel is screaming at an inanimate object, tragically missing the point of her own sad story as her ax flies.

4- New Albion 1

Where it all begins. The set dressing done in this song is brilliant in two ways. The first being that as just a listener, it’s like a pop-up book is opening and unfolding in your brain. Like a DM just before the beginning of a long, long campaign setting up the most intricate and alive world you’ve ever had the pleasure of stepping into. This is how musicals should be (something I’ve noticed is that immersion is distinctly lacking in modern day mainstream shows) where they entice you, guide you into a story before plopping you right down into the action. It’s exciting to hear what’s around every corner of this intensely strange city. The second is that when this is staged, despite imagination not being all that necessary, it is as though Kate is conducting the city to come to life herself. Set pieces gliding in from stage right, the one eyed red haired dwarf strolling onto stage tossing a pair of silver dice in the air, the city itself rising as Kate builds upon it. New Albion 1 works because it is not complicated, it tells you things as they are because what they are is already a wonder to imagine or see. And the continuous line of ‘and Annabel McAlistair is raising up the dead’? Brilliant intrigue, instantly letting us in on the score. More stories should try this method, after all why do people like Hamilton or Hadestown or Heathers or Natasha Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812 so much? Their intros lay it out and we get to sit back and enjoy the spread. Also of course, this is the origin of the New Albion theme, the one all the narrators use. It’s just beautifully simple and strange and it makes me emotional whenever I hear it across the albums. Even when I’m all the way in the future, watching Jane fight for her life and Han Mi struggle with creating her own narrative, I hear that familiar tune and think about where it all began, with a sad lonely blorbo trying to bring back to life her own blorbo.

3- Priscilla and Jasper Play Cards

This song is disgustingly good. It’s a final act showdown, an earned epic moment in the narrative. Finally everything that has happened in this fucked up city is reaching a head in Byron McAlistair’s basement of all places and it is beautiful on delivery. The reprise of so many important motifs, my favorite being Jasper saying ‘be my angel’- the chills I get every time I hear him use that line is outrageous. Now I’m not sure who is right, but my interpretation of Jaspers line in that moment is that he’s asking Soldier to be his ‘angel’ by shooting him and finally, y’know, letting this man fucking die. But then I saw someone else say Jasper is saying this to Priscilla, begging her not to do this for him as he has finally accepted being alive again and doesn’t want her to die due to finally loving a McAlistair. Whatever the interpretation, canonical or not, it is a rip out your heart kind of moment. Sacrifice, duty and love all culminating to finally end the cycle of madness started so long ago in an epic trio of fantastic vocals. And when Priscilla finally can hear the music, the message Kate has been trying to get through, it’s breathtaking. You have to wonder how Kate feels when this happens, when she’s actually listened to. And just when you think it’s over…

2- I Will Bring You Down

…A new hero starts the cycle anew. This song is so fucking dramatic, so very end of an action movie sounding song and yet it works. It works because this is a relatively new character who is now able to think for himself, not just rehash the creed which will haunt this city for generations to come. And his thoughts (the music) sound incredibly unique to everyone else and that is a sign of so much care and attention from Paul. It’s a call to action, a sign of a new age coming whether the city and its people want it or not. It’s the beginning of a new story placed squarely as this shows finale. Finally, when the dust settles it is not a McAlistair who ends the tail in triumph, but a random soldier who kicks of another set of events. Circles really do never stop themselves.

1- Elysian Night

It’s hard for me to express what I feel when I listen to Elysian Night. Usually when I’m talking to people about it I end up struggling and stuttering and start spouting about something ephemeral leaving the person I’m talking to trying to decipher my words. What can one say about Elysian Night that isn’t already felt when you listen? Much like The Old Trunk in the Attic, it stands out amongst the rest of Paul’s works while somehow being the golden center of the sewn together quilt. It’s honest, it’s raw. It’s all the thoughts Jasper has been desperately trying to say after three generations of living. Picking apart other songs on the radio just to craft this one that will hopefully (tragically and inevitably fly over peoples heads) send the message about how he and every other doll in the city has been robbed of something that can barely be described. How do you not love this song? How do you not feel every emotion Jasper has raging on inside the machine that is his body? It’s close to one of the best songs Paul has ever written and I’m grateful to be alive in the time I am to be able to listen.

Thank you so much for reading if you’ve gotten this far! I’ll probably do another one for Radio Hour as it is my favorite of all the albums and we’ll see where this all goes. If you have any questions or would like to share your own opinion about the songs or have a bone to pick with me about the order they fall into, feel free to send me an ask or use the comments on this post. I never really get to talk about the Shaperaverse with people in real life and despite the discord community being amazing a full of incredible people, I find it hard to interact so I lurk most of the time. Thanks again for reading and happy listening!

[rknchan]

i wondered why i underestimated fresh so much - and came to a unexpected conclusion: all my favorite cure protagonists - megumi from hcpc, hikaru from startwi, haruka from gopri - are all strange, quirky, idealists, children at heart, their characters are very hyperbolised - although it doesnt mean people like them dont exist

it explains why they're not liked in the fandom (at least what ive seen) "megumi is a mary sue and unrealistically kind" "haruka dreams to become a princess? who is she, a 5 year old?" "what's up with hikaru's obsession with space and eternal optimism? so childish and stupid" and such people like megumi or haruka ARE often treated like this in real life

love momozono is not at all strange - in fact she is the most ordinary person ever - so ordinary i considered her boring and i was badly mistaken love is that girl next door, simple, real, never doubting, sacrificing everything for her friends without any hesitation - because she can't imagine any other option it is this very ordinary girl who saves all the parallel worlds, becomes a responsible leader and caring "parent" for chiffon - and she's the one who makes setsuna feel happy, feel at home, this setsuna who has never knew love and friendship and maybe thats what makes love so lovable (sorry for the pun)

hcpc characters meet each other for the first time, their characters are bright, turbulent and contrasting, which leads to many strange situations. each new day spent together becomes an adventure and opens up new sides in the characters - that's why not a single filler episode seems like a filler

love-miki-inori trio are best friends since childhood, they do not need sentimentality of meguhime and declarations of love every day - they know too well they indeed love each other, all their warmth is hidden inside (although I don't really see it and it often seemed to me that miki and inori were just "additions to love")

hcpc is a very psychological season, where much attention is paid to the characters' personalities and ideologies, posing questions - what is happiness? what is love? who deserves love and happiness? therefore, hcpc villains have deep personalities and traumas - to show that they are people who have become evil for a reason

moebius is a function, but its how he should be: he is literally an AI that fulfills its function

so in the end idk why i didn’t like fresh that much, it must be good, it really must be good - but i just can’t understand it, it doesnt give me that kirayaba feeling that im looking for in every media i watch. hope startwi will return this feeling to me …

sorry fresh fans its all my personal interpetation and most likely im wrong. im just here with my silly little analyses

[hyusolk]

I am your personal therapist, now..why do you like jay so much, go on write a whole ass paragraf :)

oh fuck im really bad at typing out what im thinking but ill do my best

WHY DO I LIKE HONG JAEYEOL SO MUCH?:

I love blonde fictional characters

Does not fight often, therefore he never looks... bad. (like those weird ass faces when they get punched im sorry it gives me the ick 😭😭) I'm actually not too interested in the fighting styles and shit, Jaeyeol doesn't seem to be either so I wonder what he just does daily. (honestly, probably just studies)

Already said this before but my favorite characters end up being the quiet mysterious ones. We unfortunately don't know much about him so he's very mysterious. Yes, I am very curious about him, but I like to keep the mysterious aspect of him that I love so much. Honestly, I get worried that I won't love him as much anymore when his whole character and past is revealed. That is why I prefer to fawn over him rather than spend my time trying to figure him out.

I've realized that I lowkey kind of relate to him... except for the fact that he's filthy rich. I am also very reserved and I'm not good with communicating my feelings or thoughts. Also, he seems to prioritize Daniel over everything else. I relate to that a lot because I find myself having a "favorite person" that I would take extra care to. The obvious favour for Daniel over anyone else -> he's just like me.

The fact that he just doesn't talk. I find myself loving characters like this. I believe in actions > words supremacy. I really love shit where you don't necessarily have to read text to understand what's going on or what the characters are trying to say. Or actually that might just be because I dislike reading text and prefer looking at pictures.

He is hot. He is cute. He is handsome. He is beautiful. This man is absolutely perfect. Like I'm gonna be deadass when I say that I literally just spend a few minutes from time to time looking at pictures of him and melting. LMAO THIS REMINDS ME OF WHEN I USED TO BE A HUGE MIN YOONGI LOVER BRO LOOKING AT PICTURES OF THAT GUY INSTANTLY MADE MY DAY BETTER (my friend knew that too and legit tried showing me pics of him to make me feel better 😭 twas cute tho)

HE IS SO DAMN COOL. LIKE THIS MAN IS SO UNEXPECTED. HE'S UNPREDICTABLE IN A GOOD WAY. Examples: him pulling out a gun, his systema style getting introduced, fucking pulling up on a motorcycle to save danny, smoking n looking all hot after beating the shit out of burn knucle members, etc etc etc)

anyways thank you for this ask zenin i had fun thinking about it!! i honestly probably have more reasons i cant think of rn 😭

[love-me-a-lotta-whump]

Hello! I’ve been following your blog for a few months, I mostly followed because my best friend is really into whump and I have been hoping to get her into K-Dramas with me, so I figured if I used ones you’d done lists for, I might find something she’d like lol

Anyway, this had the unexpected side effect of making me question whether or not I like whump too because a fair number of my favorite K-Dramas happen to apparently be quite whumpy and one of my favorite Korean actors (Lee Jong Suk) does quite a lot of roles where he is the whumpee. I consider myself more of a fluff person (though I do like hurt-comfort), I think perhaps my favorite shows just happen to be whumpy, but that’s not what I’m there for lol

I think this just ended up being a very long and very ADHD way of saying that I enjoy all the work that you do in making whump lists and it’s been somewhat helpful in aiding me in my attempts to understand what whump is (I’m still confused if I’m honest, but it’s okay) and curate a list of K-Dramas to recommend to my best friend 💜

- T.H.

Hello!!!

I have so many thoughts omg.

First of all, I’m happy to hear you’ve been following my blog for so long! It’s

But also it’s so kind and thoughtful of you to try to connect with your friend through her interests and it speaks volumes to how much she trusts you that she would tell you about her whump interests.

I do have well over 100 kdrama whump lists so there’s no shortage for her to pick from lol. And wether you’re into whump or not, you’re still very welcome in the community. If you ever figure it out, feel free to message me again and I’ll congratulate you lol. I can definitely try to help you figure out if it’s coincidental or not if you’d like.

But yeah if you wanna bring her over here and show her all my kdrama lists I’d be more than happy to give some recs. I’m actually about to upload even more so… 😏

And I have ADHD as well so don’t worry about it lol. It’s very easy for me to follow. 🥰

Feel free to message me any time if you need anything. My inbox and DMs are always open. 🖤