#but my ass doesn't want to deal with the negative reaction of having to Reject this person
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miesozernacma · 5 months ago
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how can one go about a friend breakup?
asking for a friend
#miesozernacma#theres this girl who initiated our friendship last year#around october maybe?#and weve been in a lik group of four since then#but ive realized were not very compatible as people#sure we may laugh together#but overall it seemed like the only reason we started talking was because she saw i drew genshin impact stuff during class#and 1) i dropped this game back in first grade of hs#and 2) i think this game sucks and i dont think she plays it that much now anyway#its not that we have completely different interests thats not even the main problem#ive built up like a grudge overtime about things that mildly irritate me in our everyday interactions#and i am literally uninterested in speaking to her By default because of these things.#i know damn well i cant drag this along forever because ill go insane and i actually genuinely dont want to talk to her because#of her quirks or whatnot#there are many things ive catalogued that push me away from her#from speaking habits to way of talking about things#to very short temper (gets audibly mad when i ask her to repeat because she speaks so quietly)#etc etc#if she had tumblr (and i Dont Know if she does) she might figure out it's her just based of the genshin#but anyway thats my semivent. im in a people pleasing pickle rn#so you could say#like i do not want to be around this girl because i have Such a problem with these certain things about her#and she would be grateful if i was upfront#but my ass doesn't want to deal with the negative reaction of having to Reject this person#Kicking Them Out of my everyday school life for the most part#._. if you read this far id appreciate ur thoughts
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shannonsketches · 1 year ago
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Can I just say I love how you can be somewhat critical about certain things about totk without completely and unnecessarily trashing it and even adding humor. I wish more people were like that.
Aw, thank you! I'm just trying to make sure folks feel safe to enjoy things here (as long as, yknow, the respect goes both ways).
I definitely used to be someone who would trash stuff unnecessarily, and I'll always credit a mutual (although I did forget their handle,,,I'm so sorry) I had at the time for just letting me go on a long rant about why something bothered me and went, "That sounds really personal, but that got nothing to do with this." And all at once I realized I'd been projecting my needs/wants/expectations onto other peoples work (commercial or otherwise), and holding strangers responsible for serving me, specifically! Which is an absurd thing to expect from anyone!!
And sometimes I still forget the world doesn't revolve around me, glorious me, and I have to go back and apologize and do my mental health homework to figure out why I reacted a certain way, and why I took something so personally. But it's been really helpful to try and do the homework first, or type that whole salty take up and delete it or draft and review it again in the morning, before you make a stranger (or a friend!) feel bad or unsafe with you for the crime of enjoying something you didn't (which I have done, many times, and feel very bad about).
Plus, I've learned that if you're someone who is always analyzing and critiquing things, those moments can be really good practice for (respectfully! privately! in your own space! not on that stranger's post! not in that poor dev's DMs!) considering what you might have done differently, assuming you had the same parameters and resources available. I find this is especially good practice if you plan on entering a creative field! I promise you get a lot more sympathetic with how things turn out when you force yourself to dream within a budget and a deadline.
(also being nice to professionals is good practice! Some of them are jerks, true, but 99% of devs artists designers directors etc are just doing their best under a ton of stress and pressure to make everyone happy, and they're usually really proud of what they're able to accomplish, and they are absolutely not getting paid enough to deal with the comment section)
Once you let go of that need to be Correct and have control over stuff that isn't about you, you end up having a lot more fun and a lot less limitations for playing in the sandbox, and with other creatives! Plus you learn about yourself, and what your priorities and tastes are. You become a better story teller and collaborator when you can not only find but actively look for the good in things you may have completely dismissed as a kneejerk reaction to not liking something about it.
And again, I'm definitely still an ass, a lot more often than I'd like to be. I still struggle with that need to be Correct and to have complete control over my sandbox. I still get defensive and have to navigate rejection sensitivity when someone's idea contradicts mine. I definitely understand the reactivity when something means a lot to us, and it takes practice to share when you're used to being protective! But it's so, so worth it.
You meet such amazing people and find such wonderful, supportive communities when you embrace two cake theory. I highly recommend making an effort to expand your perspective and be a part of that support.
Supportive Community Pro-Tips from a Fandom Old Guy:
You don't have to adopt a theory to enjoy or appreciate it!
If someone's takes upset you, just block them. It's okay.
Don't critique someone's work unless they ask for critique
Don't RB someone's work with negative/contradictory comments, just make your own post
DO freak out in the tags/comments/inbox if you like something
Obviously don't wish harm over ships/headcanons/etc, just block!
Remember someone else's work is not about you
Remember someone else's work is Not About You
Are they experiencing a thing? Are they sharing their experience with you? That's a gift! Treat it like one!
Elitism is a mind killer. Newer ≠ Lesser, Older ≠ Greater. We all have stuff to offer and we all have stuff to learn.
and if I may impart the most important thing I've ever learned in fandom:
BE NICE TO EACH OTHER, WE'RE ALL JUST MAKING STUFF UP!
Thank you for the lovely message and for letting me ramble I'm!! Sorry this got so long and preachy, haha
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robinofgothamcity · 3 years ago
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♡ scenario: connor losing his mind when you're hurt and charging into the fight recklessly.
♡ pairing: connor kent ( superboy ) x fem! reader
♡ note: not checked for grammar or spelling mistakes / i'm sorry but i'm living for these angst to fluff moments rn especially bc i rewatched reign of the superman and forgot how much i loved connor in it.
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Connor watched as you were completely slumped on the side of the building, no longer clear headed and struggling to stay awake. what was supposed to be a clean and easy mission turned out to be more than what the league expected.
he had requested for back up and while they were already trying to fight off the thugs that were attacking Connor, he could still see that you were fighting to stay alive and he had no idea if you were even going to come out of this fight alive.
"what the fuck?" Connor whispered, seeing you now slumped on the ground. he turned to the person who attacked you, eyes fully red with no intention of holding back. Clark could sense his song was a second away from committing murder as he saw Connor charge into the heart of the battle with no game plan, just murder.
"SUPERBOY NO!"
+
you waved shyly to the group of league members as you hid behind Wonder Woman. you were new to the scene of sidekicks and had no idea how to even introduce yourself without sounding like a complete idiot.
"woah new girl!" you heard a male voice say as you stood in your place petrified. you had no idea who it was as Diana had yet to individually introduce you to everyone, "i call dibs!" you heard the same voice say.
Diana turned to you before grabbing the boy who was charging towards you by the head and tossed him back to Superman, "she's not up for 'dibs' Superboy. she's my newest apprentice and you will treat her as such," she threatened.
you giggled behind her as a few of the sidekicks introduced themselves. you knew them as the Young Justice team and although you weren't formally with the team, you figured Diana was training you to become apart of them in the future.
"( your hero name ), this is Superboy," Wonder Woman said, "he associated to the Super family," she explained as he pushed up his dark circled glasses and flicked his hair back, "pleasure is all mine," he muttered, shaking your hand.
you returned a tiny smile before she continued to introduce you to Robin and Impulse. you noticed how Superboy kept his eyes on you. you had no idea if it was because he liked you or he disliked you but every time you turned to look at him, he was already staring at you.
after introductions and the cliche 'your real identity is sacred' conversation ended, Diana felt it was for your own good to get used to your new 'teammates'. she wanted you to make sure you weren't uncomfortable around any of the YJ team even if that included Superboy.
"so, what do you like to do for fun?" Wonder Girl asked, sitting down next to you and handing you a bowl of popcorn. you shrugged, "uh, not much. I like to watch tv and read for the most part. no one really invites me to do things with them," you admitted, scratching the back of your head.
she laughed, putting her arm around you, "well that ends today! we should all do something fun! how about we go to the county fair? doesn't that sound fun?" she asked. you shrugged, not really opposed to the idea, "I call all the rides with ( your hero name )!" Jinny replied.
you smiled, following her and Wonder Girl out the door as Robin, Impulse, and Superboy followed behind you. Robin looked at him, "you like her don't you?" he asked, already calculating the minute Connor had fallen in love with you.
"well she's apart of the team, i'd like to hope we'd all like her," he replied as Robin shook his head, "no, you get what i mean by that," Robin pressed as he could see Connor's face fall with realization. he didn't reply but he could tell what he was tell Connor's real answer through his face.
as they arrived to the fair, they all booked it to the first food stand they saw. Robin offering to pay for everyone being Bruce Wayne's son had its benefits. you ordered a simple coffee as you didn't want Robin to spend too much on everyone.
"what ride should we all get on first?" Jinny asked excitedly. you pointed to the tallest ride, it was one of those high rides that sat two people at the top and had them spinning around, "oh I can't do that. it's way too scary," both Keli and Jinny said.
Superboy smiled at you, "I'm down if you are," he said as he grabbed two tickets from the worker, "cool," you replied as the two of you walked to the line, sweat already building up from nervousness.
once they sat the two of you and made sure you were both buckled in, you stared at Superboy nervously as the ride started up and pulled you up before immediately starting to spin. you stared at Superboy, screaming for you life. you unintentionally grabbed his arms, not realizing you were holding onto him as you continued to yell.
Superboy chuckled, finding your reaction cute.
+
after the months passed and you finally grew closer to everyone on the team, you were particularly close with Jinny and Superboy. you and Jinny shared a lot of common interests as she showed you how to shoot a gun and Superboy...well, everyone could tell the two of you were just seconds away from actually dating.
you walked into the YJ lair, sipping on hot chocolates with Jinny as the weather was turning cold. she was cracking some cringe dad jokes, trying to make you laugh as you tried to contain from choking on the hot chocolate.
"hey, where we yall at?" Keli asked. you turned to Jinny before giggling, "just doing a few errands we had to run before I had patrol with Superboy," you said, not really clarifying on what you both were actually doing.
although everyone could see how much you liked Connor, Connor himself thought you had a thing with Jinny. he knew she was particularly close with you and felt as though he was practically competing with her for your attention.
"do you have my phone?" you asked Jinny as she dug into her pocket and handed it to you. you grabbed your phone before quickly snatching her hat and putting it on, "yee-haw," you giggled into the mirror as Jinny started chasing you down the halls.
as you turned a corner, you bumped into Superboy and fell flat on your ass, "oh, I'm sorry Superboy, I didn't see you there," you groaned as Jinny grabbed her had and put it back on her, "you've yee'd your last haw," she said, making you laugh harshly.
Superboy's eye couldn't help but twitch as he gave you his hand, "ready for patrol?" he asked sternly. you looked to Jinny who crept away from the angry Kryptonian and left you to deal with him, "yeah, let me just freshen up again and I'll meet you outside," you murmured, going into the bathroom.
you quickly used the bathroom before checking if you had everything. you opened the door and walked into the lair's common area. Connor had yet to drop the angry attitude and everyone was eerily silent as you walked in. he grabbed you by the arm and practically rushed you out the door.
"weird," Jinny told Robin as he shrugged, "what isn't weird about him," he replied making everyone laugh.
patrol started extremely awkward. you hadn't felt this weird since you first started on the team and you had no idea what was wrong with Superboy since he wasn't telling you.
the two of you walked on top of roof, scanning the empty roads before you turned to look at him, "what's up? you seem bothered," you asked him as you both sat on the ledge, "seriously? you seem annoyed at me or something so at the very least you can try and tell me what's wrong," you pressured again.
he looked at you with eyes of determination before grabbing you by the collar of the shirt and pulling you into a very heated kiss. you were taken back by surprise but let him continue to kiss you. a part of yelled at Connor pulled you close but another part of him was still screaming at him that you still could've liked Jinny.
"I had to do that before Jinny officially took you away from me," your eyes fluttered in confusion, "uh, what do you mean by 'take you away from me'?" you asked, not knowing what he was talking about.
Connor sighed in frustration, "I see the way you're around Jinny and figured that she likes you and vice versa," he finally admitted as he stood up, not wanting to hear your response. you quickly stood up and grabbed him by the wrist, "hey wait," you said.
he stared at you, "I'm really not in the mood to get rejected ( your hero name )," he ran his fingers through his hair annoyed. you shook your head, "I don't like Jinny nor does she like me. we're just really close friends Superboy," you whispered, bringing him into another kiss.
this time, he was the one taken back but he melted into the kiss, all his negative emotions washing away as you continued to kiss him. he wrapped his arms around your waist as you him in closer by the neck. Connor was definitely not expecting this tonight.
"so does this mean that we're like....together together?" you asked playfully shy. Connor let out a laugh before lacing your hands together, "clearly. I can't let Jinny steal you away from me," he jokingly replied.
+
Connor ran to the three different henchmen as his strength was to the point of killing, not caring if he died in the process. he was recklessly dodging bullets, knowing they wouldn't do anything to him. he grabbed the first man and threw him against a wall as it collapsed around him. Connor only hoping that it did enough damage to unalive him.
the second one he managed to choke him out enough to the point where he passed out but that wasn't enough for him. you were on the brink of death and if he had to see you die, he was going to make sure the men who possibly killed you got what they deserved.
"SUPERBOY!" he heard his father scream again. Connor paid no attention to him as he grabbed the third henchman and slammed him to the ground, throwing punches left and right, "listen to me," Clark screamed at him.
he could see the tears coming down Connor's face as anger, fear, and sadness clouded his mind, "this is not you! pull out of it!" he yelled, shaking Connor's shoulder, "you're about to kill this man. I get that you're angry but you don't get anything out of hurting him. all you get it consequences and your girlfriend needs you right now more than ever!" he continued.
Connor finally shook himself out of his trance as he heard his dad telling him to go to you. Connor nodded and ran to you, seeing you unconscious and hardly breathing, "I'm taking her to the hospital," he yelled to Batman before hauling your body into his arms and flying towards the nearest hospital.
once he finally reached the emergency doors, he shoved everyone out of his way and to the front desk, "she needs help...NOW!" he yelled to the poor receptionist. the girl jumped up from fear but nodded and screamed for a bed and a few doctors.
the doctor asked Connor to place you on the bed before the doctor told him that he could follow them inside. a part of Connor wanted to straight up move the doctor to follow you into the OR but he knew that he'd get into more trouble with his dad and the MPD if he hurt anyone else.
for what felt like hours, he was waiting inside of the room they had told him you'd be in once you got out of surgery. he had already gotten the lecture from his dad about the consequences he would've gotten if he actually managed to kill the three men earlier.
"she's going to make it," the doctor told Connor as he walked into the room while they adjusted you to the bed. Connor nodded, "she'll be out of duty for months. she sustained a lot of injuries to her body that'll take weeks to recover and she got a nasty concussion so you'll need to play doctor for the next few weeks to make sure she's okay," he explained.
Connor nodded as the doctor told him that you should be waking up within the next few hours. Connor adjusted himself on the seat and got comfortable as he had no intentions of leaving your side until you were awake and ready to leave the hospital.
you woke up a few hours later, your body killing you from all over as you saw balloons all around the room. you knew you had landed in the hospital but you had no idea how long you were asleep or in a coma even. you turned to see Connor passed out next to you, his body slumped awkwardly.
"Kon, Kon wake up!" you whispered, shaking him softly. Connor jumped up in a fright as he immediately realized you were awake, "how do you feel? are you okay? do you need anything?" he immediately asked as you couldn't help but laugh at his frantic attitude.
"Connor, I'm okay, I promise," you whispered as you brought him in for a kiss, "my body just hurts and i'm still kinda tired," you murmured as Connor nodded. you managed to wiggle yourself enough to make space for him, "babe, it looks like you haven't slept in days."
"I had to make sure you were okay so i haven't exactly slept in a while," he admitted sheepishly. you shook your head, "you're too much sometimes," you giggled as you put your head on his shoulder, "but you love me regardless," he replied.
this was the first time the L word had came up in the relationship, "yeah, I guess I do but now you need to sleep," you said as you closed your eyes and felt Connor pull you closer to him, "I love you too by the way," you whispered, giving him another kiss on his partially exposed chest.
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queenxxxsupreme · 4 years ago
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Mmm... what about Lambert trying to impress his crush with a thoughtful birthday or Christmas present? (It doesn't really have to be christmasy I just remembered where in that time of the year), but he sorta struggles to find the right moment to give it to them since he doesn't really want everyone to see him being vulnerable :)
A/N: As we all know, I’ve been shit at writing lately but RDR2 has me fucking up and I’ve gotta distract myself from that for a sec so this is what happened when I did that. I hope you like this babe!! And I’m sorry it took so long!!
***
Lambert groaned, running a hand over his face. He sat at a table in the library as he gave himself a pep talk. 
Just try one more time, Lambert. One more time to give Y/N the stupid gift and if it doesn’t work out, then maybe it’s the Universe saying Y/N wouldn’t like the gift. 
He let out a sigh and put his head down on the table. 
The young wolf had tried three times already today to give you a gift he bought while in Novigrad, but each time he was interrupted. 
First, it was Ciri barging in to tell him how she had mastered working two daggers and begging him to come watch her. Then it was Eskel and Jaskier walking into the room and not leaving. Then it was Jaskier being too nosey and friendly for his own good and just lingering in the room. 
Lambert sat up and rubbed his face again. 
It was a stupid idea to spend money on a stupid gift that you probably wouldn’t like anyways. You wouldn’t feel the same way about him, not about a witcher. You were too good for a witcher, for a beast like him. 
It was a stupid and childish idea that Eskel had fed into last winter when Lambert confessed to Eskel in a slightly drunken stupor that he harbored feelings for you. He wasn’t even that drunk, Eskel was just easy to talk to. It was Eskel who suggested a small gift to start the courting process, to get an understanding of your feelings towards Lambert. 
But now Lambert had the stupid gift so he had no choice but to give it to you, right?
“Damn it, wolf.” Lambert cursed to himself, hitting his fist against the table. Now was the time to do it. He just had to get it over with before the anxiety ate him up inside. 
***
He found you in the kitchen with Eskel and Vesemir. 
“Y/N?”
You turned your head and looked at him. The way your face lit up and a smile tugged at the corners of your lips didn’t go unnoticed by him. 
The two of you had flirted and shared rather intimate nonsexual moments here and there over the last year, but nothing had ever come of it. Neither of you had taken the next step in the relationship. Every time Lambert thought he was ready to do so, he would chicken out at the last minute, allowing all of the negative thoughts and voices in his head to tell him it would end badly, that there was no reason to even try. 
“Can I, uh, talk to you for a second?” He rubbed the side of his neck. 
“Of course.” You nodded, standing from the table. 
You followed him for quite some time down the maze of hallways until it seemed like you were at a dead end. 
“Lambert, where in the world are you taking me?” 
Silently, he dug his hand into his pocket and pulled out a sachet.
“Here.” He placed the dark blue velvet in your hand and turned to walk away. He wasn’t prepared for your reaction, for your rejection. But he only managed to get a few paces past you before your hand clasped the back of his doublet. 
“Hold on just a second.”
“Y/N, really, it isn’t a big deal. Just saw the stupid thing in Novigrad and thought you’d like it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a den of drowners-,”
“Lambert.” You cut him off, your voice soft and tender. 
The way you said his name was so sweet he swore it could make him sick if you said it too much. 
You pulled the necklace from the sachet and admired it, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. A tear drop sapphire hung from a golden chain. 
“Oh, Lambert. It’s…. It’s absolutely beautiful.”
“It’s nothing.” He muttered, stuffing his hands into his pockets.
“Will you help me put it on?” You asked him. 
“You…. You’ll wear it?” Lambert furrowed his brows together.
“Of course.” You looked up at him. “Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do with a necklace?”
He rolled his eyes, taking the necklace from you.
“Turn around, smart ass.”
You turned around so that your back was to him. 
“Has this been what’s been making you act silly all day?” You asked quietly, turning your head to the side as he clasped the chain together. 
“Didn’t know when the best time to give it to you was.” He muttered, crossing his arms over his chest as you turned back to face him. 
“Well, I think it would’ve been perfectly fine had you given it to me in front of everyone.” You placed your hand on his arm and leaned in to kiss his cheek. “I think it’s absolutely gorgeous, Lambert. Thank you.”
As you moved to walk down the hall, you missed the rosy pink that came to Lambert’s cheeks. He watched you for a few moments, then scrunched his nose up and followed you.
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