#but maybe by the time this posts its wednesday already so i've had a chance to play

[peachymilkandcream]

Fraud | Part 1 | Yandere All Might x Hero!Reader

(A/N: So I decided to start this instead of the Reiner one (which I have some drafts off for the future don't worry. But I'm currently rewatching the show right now so I'm just particularly more inspired by this one. So if/when I do the AOT one I'm not sure. Most likely not for a while unless I feel super inspired by it. And if so I'll probably write it all out and then post it on an additional day once a week. Since I usually post Break Me Slowly on Monday and now this on Tuesday, if I decide to do it I most post it on a Wednesday basis. I'm not sure. Also this won't follow canonical story line! For a little background, reader's hero name is Shade, and their quirk is that they can create shadow copies of their enemies. But thank you for reading and comment to be added to the taglist!)

WARNINGS: implied noncon, dubcon, manipulation, domestic abuse, yandere themes, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, stockholm syndrome, graphic depictions of violence, mind breaking, misogyny, power imbalance, age difference, etc.

==============================================

The world's symbol of peace and justice, a hero for all. Great and mighty. People all across the world knew him, he was the ultimate authority on this planet. Respected and revered.

All Might. The Symbol of Peace.

As a pro, Shade of course respected him above all other heroes, he was the ultimate role model that everyone should look up to and adore. Admittedly that had to do with her desire to become just like him since she was a bit of a fangirl. But regardless, there was nothing so bad about wanting to follow his ideals, was there?

She was determined to meet him one day and make an impression. Hopefully, he would see her talent and invite her to be one of his sidekicks. It wouldn't be totally uncommon, Sir Nighteye was already his right hand man, surely a hero as busy as him could use some more help to keep Japan in its state of reigning peace.

Ever since she was little she dreamed of becoming a pro just like him, she enjoyed watching his battles and keeping up with the news of his latest feats to inspire herself even on her daily commute, who wouldn't want a chance to impress their idol by embodying the same ideals he has?

Besides, her success as a pro was...lacking, to say the least. Her quirk was impressive enough, creating shadows of her enemies and even comrades to fight with her in battle. However the problem lied with the fact that some people believed her quirk seemed rather villainous from outward perspective, apart from some of the teens who enjoyed more intense heroes she had a small fanbase. Most of the ones who did follow her stopped after they discovered her personality didn't match her hero persona at all.

A boost from All Might's agency would really help her brand.

Eventually she could go out more on her own and maybe in form a team with her new found friend and mentor.

"Wake up Shade! Unless you want to be sprayed with acid in the face!?"

On the scene of the crime several pros faced off against a dastardly villain, his quirk was to spew acid from his mouth, and the power of it was disintegrating her shadows. It always seemed like the moment she had a chance to make a name for herself it was against a villain who completely outmatched her quirk type.

"I'm awake, okay? I've got it."

Nothing was able to touch this villain, all hope seemed to be lost until the laugh she had gotten so familiar with filled the air.

"Fear not citizens, hope has arrived!"

An expression of wonder and awe comes across her face when the gust of wind followed by the monstrous form of the Number One Hero steps into the scene.

"Because I am here."

One punch is all it ever took for the criminals to surrender and admit defeat, but this was the first time she had seen him in a professional setting, he was even more amazing then she ever could have believed!

Now was her chance to become a hero just like him.

============================================

"Well done fellow pros, that evil-doer was certainly a heavy hitter, but all of your valiant efforts to keep the peace are much appreciated." His smile never wavered.

"You were amazing All Might, I think I can speak for all of us when we say thank you for saving our butts back there. None of our quirks were really suited for it." Shade's giddy expression never left, truly in awe of the man before her.

"Anytime, but I don't think I've seen you before, still a newbie I take it."

She blushes ever so slightly. "Yes sir, I'm just starting out, my hero name is Shade, it's super nice to meet you-"

"The pleasure is all mine ma'am," His stare was piercing, as if deciding if she really was a hero. "now I must be off, a hero's always got somewhere to be!"

With that he flew off, leaving her behind even more inspired than before.

"He's the most amazing hero in the universe, one day I'll be just like him-"

==============================================

All Might returned to Nighteye religiously pouring over his computer screen, only around his sidekick could the hero's mask fall slightly. His smile disappearing.

"Excellent work on that takedown, your approval rating keeps going up."

"I want you to do something for me. There's a new hero in town, goes by Shade. A newcomer. Find out everything you can about her."

"Why? Another one of your little projects?"

"You could say that."

"All Might this is twice this year now."

"Does that matter? It's not my fault the last ones couldn't handle me."

He rolls his eyes. "I'll find what I can. But go easy this time, alright? I barely was able to cover it up last time."

"Agreed. I'll be more careful."

He shut the door behind him to his personal quarters, staring down at the city below. Being the strongest in the world came with a deep sense of dissatisfaction, he was untouchable, unbreakable.

He needed something to break.

[ceruleanmusings]

the impression that i get - mickames

i've had the basis of this dialogue exchange in my head for ages but couldn't figure out what fic to put it in and where or how until i decided to just take it out and make it its own scene instead of trying to shoe-horn it in somewhere else. i was going to wait and post this on james' canon birthday in two days but i got impatient. i need the fluff. this is set in season 2. @raging-violets @partiallypearl @witchofinterest @myloveforhergoeson

“You’re still here?” James asked, leaning against the door frame to Kelly’s office. Feet crossed at angles, hands shoved in pockets, arm pressed against the wood from forearm, backpack hanging off the crook of his bent elbow. The perfect pose of nonchalance—practiced nonchalance because he had to always have everything regarding his appearance on point.

Mickey glanced at him from around Kelly’s laptop on her standing desk. It was the slight crease to her brow that made him realize his mistake.

It was Wednesday.

He knew that.

He knew she knew he knew that.

She always stayed behind to help Kelly with her administrative work on Wednesdays. It usually amounted to taking messages or ignoring calls Kelly didn’t want to deal with or translating meeting notes or updating contact information for potential talent recruitment.

“You’re still here,” she commented, still looking at him but clicking at something on the screen. “Didn’t you finish laying down tracks a few hours ago?”

He did, indeed. Getting songs done in one take wasn’t hard for him but he wanted to make sure they had more than one perfect track to use. It was always good to have options, wasn’t it? “Gustavo wanted me to get some new headshots done.”

The crease smoothed out and was replaced with the tiniest of smiles pulling back the corner of her mouth. Anyone else might not have noticed but he for sure did. He’d spend enough time looking at her. He had all her micro expressions memorized.

“He wasn’t a fan of Hot Janitor or Hot Librarian?”

“No!” James rolled his eyes and stood straight. Clearly Gustavo didn’t know what he was talking about. “I, for one, think he’s just jealous.”

“Well, he has a few things to choose from on that front.”

He didn’t have a chance to dig more into that comment because her attention too quickly moved back to the screen. All mirth left her face and a deep concentration took over as she hid behind the screen once more. He twisted his mouth to the side. That wasn’t how he planned this encounter to go. He had to keep it going.

“What’re you doing?” He stepped further into the room, his steps halting and tentative. It wasn’t that he thought Kelly would stoop so low to have shock pads on the floors of her office but, well, Gustavo had some interesting ways to corral them that he wouldn’t entirely put past the staff of Rocque Records to be a little unique themselves.

“Uncle Gustavo wants his audition tapes organized.” She sighed and rubbed an eye. “Thing is it’s already sorted and named by date, but he wants folders in folders and some arbitrary system that makes sense to no one else but him.” She lifted a piece of paper that had what looked to be chicken scratch scribbled all over it.

James nodded. “Sounds like Gustavo alright.”

She hummed and slapped the paper back down on the desk. A few loose Starburst wrappers—pinks and reds—flew off the desk. “Thankfully it’s only for the last year so it’s not too much but…”

Last year? James’ ears perked up. That meant his audition had to be in there somewhere. Had she seen it? Studying her face gave him no answers. She had a way of keeping everything locked up tight. And with her concentration thrown on top of it, chipping away would have to be delicate.

“Didyouwatchmine?”

Being delicate wasn’t his strong suit.

Something crossed her face, a sort of careful contemplation mixed with that made every second pass like an eternity. “Yes,” she finally answered. The simple word nearly knocked him over. Or maybe it was the gust of relief wooshing out of him that made him take a step back. Made him take stock of the reality of the conversation they were having. She’d seen his audition. She had thoughts about his audition. He needed to know what they were.

"And?" The question burst out of him, his body nearly vibrating with anticipation.

"And I thought you were good.” She shrugged, shuffled papers again, and put them in the small metal basket marked OUT with a small white label. Oh. Good. Not great or fantastic or anything. Just good. But “good” was better than nothing wasn’t it? He could take good. “And then you stage-dived onto security.” She pointed at the screen as if to remind him.

“Yeah, well, Kendall needed my help." James shrugged. “He had my back. I needed to have his.”

That look came back to her face. Her mouth twisted to the side and, for second, he didn’t think she’d say anything but, after a small shake of her head, she continued, ”…For the record, I thought Uncle Gustavo was crazy not to initially pick you.”

“Really?” He for sure thought so, especially following up with his crazy idea that James had no talent. But to hear someone else say it to him, for her to say it to him, he had to make sure he wasn’t dreaming.

A light flush came to her cheeks and she cleared her throat. “…But it all worked out in the end. For the best, I think. You belong here.” She flashed a small smile and he may as well have burst into a thousand pieces. He wasn’t hard to please: some pie, a compliment or two, maybe tell him they were proud of him, someone acknowledging his talents and his efforts, and he was good to go. But this…

She’d said that to him before; in fact he remembered it was the very first thing she’d ever said to him, and it meant as much now as it did then, nearly a year ago. She had to have said that on purpose, right?

“Hey, how’s it goin’?” James nearly groaned when Kelly came into her office. She had to notice she was ruining the moment, right? Because there definitely was a moment and he wasn’t making it up. He wouldn’t come crashing back down to reality like that if there hadn’t been one. The little wings on his feet must’ve melted.

“Almost done,” Mickey replied though the weariness in her words clued James in she didn’t actually believe it. But it was probably what Kelly wanted to hear. “Are you ready to go?”

Kelly grimaced. “That’s the thing. We had another meeting called; it’s going to take some time. You should probably grab a bus and head home.” Mickey groaned. “I’m sorry but those pesky things called child labor laws have my hands tied.”

“You’re not even paying me.”

Kelly gestured with her ever-present clipboard. “And that makes it worse.” Her eyes slid over to James. “You should be going too.” Walking past him, Kelly moved to her desk, pausing only to give a brief glance at the scattered candy wrappers on the floor before reaching for a drawer. It slid open with a few squeaks and she removed her purse, then her wallet, then some money. “Here,” she said, pressing it into Mickey’s palm, “I won’t be too late. If I am, you girls can order a pizza.”

Mickey clicked her tongue and pocketed the money. “You say that like you’re doing us a favor, but you just don’t want to do the dishes if we make dinner.

“Two things can be true at once,” Kelly replied and then kissed her cheek. Kelly was back out of the room in a flurry, sucking the past ease out behind her in her fast-moving wake. Awkwardness settled in. Mickey shifted her weight from foot to foot before she went around turning off the computer, checking the drawers of Kelly’s desk and filing cabinets, closing the blinds, watering some plants he thought was fake, turning on a desk lamp, to turn off the overhead lights, grab her bag, and lock the door. James watched it all with curious eyes. He’d seen enough rom-coms—enjoyed them, devoured them, studied them—to know The Stall. But was it for his benefit?

“I’ll wait with you,” he said when she gave him a look, turning away from the door. “I’m heading in the same direction anyway.” She couldn’t argue that. Kelly did tell him to leave too, after all. She played with the keys in her hands, they jingled and jangled in her twitchy grip, and she nodded.

She still swung them in restless fingers when the bus drove up five minutes later. It was drowned out by the loud hiss as the bus settled and the doors opened. People gathered and bunched up, waiting to board after others got off. James swung his bag to the front digging in it as the line moved forward. Mickey boarded and he stepped back, still rooting around, giving space to others.

Finally, he found a few crumpled bills at the bottom of his bag—the leftovers of his per diem from the week—and dropped it in the collection container at the front of the bus. He quickly navigated his way past the rows at the front until he reached Mickey’s and dropped into the empty seat next to her. She froze, earbuds dangling from fingers halfway to her ears to stare at him.

“James?”

“Yes?” He settled his bag on his lap and stretched one leg out into the aisle. He forgot how close the seats could be.

“You don’t live this way.”

The bus rocked with new passengers boarding. “I know.”

“You’re going in the opposite direction.”

“For now.” She blinked. “You don’t like the bus.” She blinked again. Hmm. Maybe he needed to be a bit more obvious. “I’ll just ride it with you this way and take one back to the Palm Woods.”

It took for the bus doors to close and another hiss to be release as the bus pulled away for her to speak again. “You didn’t have to do that.”

He shrugged. “No big deal.” Her hands slowly lowered back to her lap, earbuds rolling between her twisting fingers. His skin burned beneath her scrutinizing gaze. Okay, he had to change the subject. Lighten the mood. Find a safe topic to talk about. And what better, safter, topic than himself? “So! My audition really must have stood out!”

“…Among others.”

“Did I make a lasting impression?” He bumped her shoulder with his own as he asked, smoothing over his question, downplaying it even though it was filled with sincerity. He wanted to know. Needed to know, even.

“You’ve made a few.” In the past? Recently? Right now? What. Did. That. Mean? His answer came a second later, like an afterthought, "Your first impression was great.”

Awesome! Upgraded from good to great!

“Your second, not so much.”

A record scratched in his head "....Huh?"

The bus rattled and shook as they moved over a bump. Her nerves seemed to shake out her thoughts along with it. "Aunt Kelly would send some of the auditions to us. Usually the bad ones so we could laugh about them. Yours was really good. I actually had Mel call them to yell at them for me for how wrong Gustavo was.”

His mind whirled, slow to catch back up from that jarring hit. He hadn’t been rattled that hard since the hockey state semi-finals in freshman year when he had a cheapshot from behind into the plexiglass. Like then, it took a bit for him to reorient himself. So that meant… “…You’ve seen my audition before.”

“Yes. You, um, how can I put this?” She paused and he waited, held his breath, didn’t make a sound. He wanted to be sure he caught every word. She always chose them so carefully. “You had this…soul? To the song. I haven’t heard anyone else sing it like you did. Like you were deeply feeling the words and what he was saying. Which…only made me believe it. You know?”

“Oh.” He should’ve been able to come up with something better but his brain glitched as he took on the new information.

 “After Kelly told us the news Gustavo was making a boy band? I, um, was hoping to meet you at some point. Especially after the song you chose.” He gaped at her and shrugged. “Which is why I was so confused that the James from the audition was so different from the James I met at the Palm Woods.”

“Oh.” He really needed to find something better to say. Sorry didn’t even come close. But how could he explain just what he felt when he first saw her? It was like he was struck by lightning, like everything he’d done in his life had brought him to that moment. Like he had an answer to a question he didn’t know existed or he’d been trying to find.

So he chased that feeling, that experience, and her by extension. And he messed it all up.

Boy, was he a giant turd.

Still… “…How’m I doing now?”

“…They say, third time’s the charm, right?” She bumped his shoulder with his, smiling softly. The sight of it made his shoulders drop and his breath ease. She held out one of her earbuds, gesturing to his ear. “I still have some bad auditions saved if you want to watch them.”

“Um, yeah!”

He pressed the earbud into his ear and leaned close, heads resting against each other’s while she pressed play.

[peaches2217]

Given the sheer number of WIPs I have, I think it's time to start participating in WIP Wednesday. Today, we begin with one I started in late May/early June and still haven't been able to quite piece together! I am DETERMINED to finish this, and maybe posting a snippet here will help kick me into gear with it 😅

Tentative title is To You Who Hung the Moon, but I'm not sure if I'm sticking with it or not.

~~~

Eyes as big and blue as a clear sky stared up at Peach.

She startled, instinctively putting distance between them. “I… I’m so sorry,” she stumbled, pressing a palm against her burning cheek. Impulse had gotten the better of her, and here she was, paying for it immediately. “I didn’t mean to intrude on your personal space.”

Mario just kept staring, and Peach wondered if it was the shock that made him so unabashed, or the combination of pain and healing magic coursing through his system. 

But eventually he grinned, and her heart settled back into its proper place.

“I won’t tell anyone.” His words were slow and a bit slurred, and Peach was somehow relieved, especially as he reached up to touch his forehead. He wasn’t all there. The chances that he’d remember this were slim.

Seeing the way he blushed as he felt the space where she’d placed her impromptu kiss, she wasn’t sure if she truly wanted that or not, but it was undoubtedly for the best.

This was far from the first kiss he’d received since being admitted to the infirmary. It was part of their unspoken system, after all: a kiss to the nose for a job well done, a kiss to the cheek in show of personal gratitude, and a kiss to the forehead for healing and strength. And he’d been receiving plenty of the latter over the past few days, because he was too stubborn for his own good and kept refusing painkillers, assuring the doctors through gritted teeth in a strained voice that he felt PERFECTLY okie-dokie, thank you very much.

(“I can’t bust out of here if I’m too loopy to see past my own nose!” he’d reasoned, tapping his nose in emphasis. “You can’t bust out of here with a broken femur either,” Luigi had fired back, and Mario simply muttered something about wills and ways.)

But this kiss broke tradition. There had been no healing magic behind it, no psychological benefits that he could reap from it in his sleep. No, this kiss had been entirely selfish, conveyed all the things Peach wanted to say but couldn’t quite find the resolve to, not yet.

Thank you for not leaving me.

That thought alone had been swirling about her head every waking moment of the past four days, among a myriad of others. “He’s gonna be okie-dokie, don’t you worry!” Luigi had been quick to say, turning her away from his pale, bruised body swaddled in bandages already soaked red. “Mario, he’s a tough guy, and I’m no good at lying, you know? So if I say he’s gonna be okay, he’s definitely gonna be okay.”

Even while shaken to the very edge of her limit, Peach had been able to tell he was saying that as much for his own sake as hers, so she clasped his hands in hers and promised to help in any way she could.

It hadn’t been Bowser, not this time, and it wasn’t her life he’d nearly given his own for. Peach wasn’t sure if she could live with herself had the circumstances been any different.

“You look so sad,” Mario noted, inadvertently pulling Peach from her brooding. “Do I need to start telling bad jokes again?”

~~~

I've got a few more disjointed sections written out, but that's the longest cohesive section. What do y'all think? Worth reviving?

[gardengobbo]

When I'd gone around the gardens with my mom to figure out what was weeds and what were plants that were supposed to be there, I noticed that the raspberries at the back had a lot of dead chunks around them, so that was my next task.

Though the whole reason I noticed it was because I was asking for a hand marking the weeds with spray paint so I could pull them for mom, but shh. My brain says prune raspberries and if I wanna keep enjoying this shit I do what my brain says it wants.

I neglected to take photos beforehand, but trust me, they look much better.

This was the 15th of May, and the day I learned spending 3 days straight hunched over in the garden for 6+ hours at a time was not something my back was keen on. And also the day I agreed to do line dancing with my mom on Wednesdays with no previous experience. That's only relevant because my legs were already not happy and adding in my disgruntled attempts at following steps I have no knowledge of made my body scream in protest. To be fair the following week I did surprisingly a lot better.

I actually had to force myself to just chill for a couple days to recover. I've not been very active in the last while, so going from 0 to 100 in 3 days was probs not a good idea. My legs are still sore in some spots like 10 days later.

So let's jump ahead once again, and now were looking at the plants progress as of the 21st of May! I'd mentioned in one of the other posts that I'd had some mint under my lamp inside, and that was just temporary. As I was cleaning up the back of the garden by the raspberries I did find some mint. My mom made it sound like there was tons of it, so I was imagining catnip amounts. There was only 3 plants. But there was a frost advisory overnight and I'd just moved them from one spot to another and didn't think they'd survive the frost. So I'd dug em up, slapped em in a pot, and brought em inside.

I did replant it into the garden with my catnip, so it's outside as of now. Chilling in the weird spot between two patches of catnip with my stargazer lily, the pink hyacinths, and the sad cactus.

But! The growth in the apples is going so well! I'm thinking I need to move them to their own pots very soon, I just lack the additional space to have 6 pots on the shelf as well as the two cala lilies and Lavender seed tray.

We've also got a leaf and two little bits poking out of the purple cala lily, and more length but still only one sprouted Lavender seed.

I was becoming a bit concerned for the yellow cala lily, so I took a chance and carefully dug it up out of the pot. Turns out I just buried it deeper in the dirt, and it's well on its way to poking out too! The day I replanted the mint was also the day I shuffled the yellow cala lily bulb up in the dirt a bit, and also picked a few lily of the valley for a small vase in my kitchen area.

I love lily of the valley. It's so dainty and simple yet so fragrent. It smells lovely out there now.

Thats all for now!

I feel like I need a catchy sign off for these posts. I always just want to say be safe, but I feel like I want to say more. Because with no context be safe can sound a bit ominous.

So maybe be safe, and don't eat random plants? (I was watching an Atomic Shimp video earlier and he'd mentioned that notnall foragable plants are safe to eat so thats why I thought of that. Despite me not actually foraging anything.)

I'll come up with something. For now, just be safe and stay zesty.

[mayorwhiskerss]

Orion: Hey, uh...you’re Nix, right? And Io, I think? 

Nix: That’s us :^)! You gonna say hey to Orion, Io? ...At least I’m pretty sure that’s your name, yeah? 

Orion: Yeah, that’s me! Uh...what are you cooking? It smells good.

Nix: Just come over here to pinch our food, huh?

Orion: Oh! No! I was just - !

Nix: Relax. I’m just messing with you. You can have some if you want; we made a bunch of pancakes. Thought we’d share them since nobody’s really prepared on the first day, least of all for breakfast. Io thinks we should keep them all though.

Io: [looks from Nix to Orion and nods]

Nix: Your eyes are bigger than your belly, babe. Anyway, take a seat, they’re almost done.

[one-abuse-survivor]

hi, it's the milky way again

it's been a while since i've dropped something in your mailbox

i've now finished the school year and the grades and reports are coming in tomorrow or the day after. i'm kinda scared of them because i know they dropped a lot since last year but i'm pretty sure i passed most if not all of my courses so i think it'll be fine.

i started working a summer job a week ago and i'll be working the next week too. it's mostly because i need the money so i can replace my broken phone but also because we had to do some kind of job/workplace experience thing because of our school (that was voluntary though because of covid). the job pays really well so i might also get a new binder with the money since the one i have now is falling apart. on the other hand, working 8 hours a day for five days straight has really taken all of my energy and i can't listen to music while working which makes it a lot harder. the last week i've mostly been coming home in the evening, maybe eating something and going straight to bed.

(also i got my period last thursday and i hate hate hate it so much it makes everything so much worse even without the dysphoria it's just so messy and annoying to deal with)

a week ago i finally jumped over my shadow and talked to my mom but it was a huge disappointment. i'm pretty sure i couldn't get my point across in a way she'd understand and she kinda just admitted not being able to help after saying a bunch of things that really hurt. i removed myself from the situation by "going to bed" aka going to my room, locking my door and crying myself to sleep. i was just really pissed off and talking to her was kinda my last resort for when i realized i couldn't help myself anymore.

anyway, the day after that was monday (when i started working) and me, running on barely any sleep because the night before was a disaster, had to somehow survive work and i'm pretty sure i ignored or snapped at a lot of people that day which i feel kinda bad for.

on wednesday after work i talked to my mom again because i was pissed off and couldn't let it sit. she said the same kind of bs she had used on sunday and we got nowhere, since then i've probably been a lot less friendly to her but i'm just not ready to give up so much energy for her.

her favorite arguments we're things like "but others have it a lot worse" (which is a mindset i've worked on getting away from for quite a while) (also my mom was referring only to my grades with this but little does she know that the only reason why my grades aren't dropping that badly is because no matter how bad i got mentally, i yeeted stuff like self-care before school because school had always been structured and mostly clear while life in general was just. not.)

other arguments she used were "just get off your phone and set a timer for 45 minutes and concentrate on what you wanna get done" and "just pull yourself together, it's not that hard" (those were about me saying that i struggle with starting tasks and getting shit done)

lastly she also said that my expectations are just way too high and that if i didn't expect only the best from myself (this was about grades too) i wouldn't get so disappointed if i didn't get that great grade i was hoping for. and like, she's not wrong but if you've only ever been good at one thing in your entire life and you were really good at it, then you'd just expect nothing but the best from yourself because you know reaching that isn't impossible.

and she ended it with "what do you expect me to do?" and "i can't help you" and i realized later that i just should've said that she should help me get someone that *can* help me, like a therapist or something.

anyway, i'm proud of myself for finding a summer job and finally talking to my mom and not so proud of my grades and the fact that i can't seem to get the point across to my mom

thank you for creating this safe space for people like us, i wish you a happier time than the one i'm having :')

milky way here :|

got the reports and grades and stuff yesterday and i'm just :| about it. like, yea i know i'm still somewhere at the top of the class and that i'm more than one and a half grades better than some others in my class but i'm still upset about my grade in maths for example but my parents laughed/chuckled at me when i was upset and that really hurt

and afterwards my mom said something along the lines of "yes you're allowed to be stressed but because of your good grades you don't have the right to complain about being stressed" which is absolute bs and i still don't understand how having good grades disqualifies one from complaining and i'm sure as hell not gonna ask her

i just wanna scream in her face but i'm pretty sure she'd slap me if i did that

i'm almost done with my summer job and since monday noon i had the chance to work in a different part of the factory which is a lot less uncomfy to be in because it has AC and since it's not in the lab itself, i don't have to wear a hair net, an overall, steel-toed boots and rubber gloves.

today i set myself a few goals for the summer break and for the next school year and i really hope i can get through with those because it'd make future-me extremely happy

have a great great time :D

and PS: since tumblr has been eating a lot of notifs lately i missed a lot of your posts and i tried filtering by the milky way anon tag but only one post showed up. i'm not sure what's up with that tho

Hi again! Don’t worry, I got you. Here’s a link to all the asks you’ve sent up to this point: first, second, third. All of them are tagged, but the tumblr search engine isn’t exactly known for its accuracy. I use the tumblr original post finder site for this stuff, but I just realised by looking for your asks that the site takes capital letters into account, so the ones that were tagged with a capital M in Milky weren’t showing. They all do show now that I changed the M to lowercase. So I’ll have to try to be more consistent with that from now on 😅

On to your asks. First off, congrats on finishing your course! And I really hope you can replace your phone and your binder :D sorry about getting your period, though, that really sucks :(

I think the conversation with your mom that Sunday is the one discussed on the third ask I linked. I'm really sorry the same thing happened on Wednesday. It's not your fault you can't get across to her—she's the one who should be open to helping you and offering possible (actual) solutions to the problems you're bringing up to her, and not you who should spell out every single thing she can do to help you. You're not being unclear to her—she's being obtuse and refusing to listen.

You're not meant to know how to just "pull yourself together", and you're absolutely right that your grades not dropping all the way doesn't mean you're not struggling, and you still deserve help so you don't have to jeopardise your mental health for your grades. And while she's right you don't deserve to be so hard on yourself or to expect perfection from yourself, that's also something that you deserve professional help with. Again, you're not meant to know how to just turn off those emotions and thought processes.

*hugs* sorry your math grade wasn't as high as you'd hoped. It's okay to be upset and disappointed by that, and I'm so sorry they laughed at you. You do have every right to express your emotions, and you're not being unfair to anyone else for being unhappy with your own grades. I often feel the same! I get really good grades (as I think I've already said), and I also often feel disappointed when a grade isn't as high as I'd hoped. There's nothing wrong with feeling that way. I'm really glad you know what your mom says is bs, because it really is. It's no wonder you feel like screaming in her face—she sounds incredibly frustrating, exhausting and invalidating to deal with. You deserve so much better than this 😔

I'm so glad you're proud of yourself! I'm really proud of you too for everything you've accomplished despite her being so unhelpful and invalidating, and I really hope you're enjoying the rest of your summer holidays and you can reach your goals! And if the occasion arises and you do end up using the "you can help me find someone who can help me" line, I hope it goes better. But if not, again, please know this is an issue of her refusing to listen, and not of you being unclear about what you need.

Sending a huge virtual hug ❤️