#but like. i just finished reading hell breaks loose. the dead men prequel set in 1703
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auuuugh there is only skulduggery pleasant in my brain right now.
#i support women's (valkyrie cain's) wrongs#like. okay. i grew up on this series and it's absolutely fundamental to my psyche#and i dont even care about the quality of the books i will read all of them forever#but also like. valkyrie is my og blorbo. my og Character I Rotate In My Mind#i also had a huge crush on her. and then derek landy made her bisexual thank u derek<3#but like. i just finished reading hell breaks loose. the dead men prequel set in 1703#and. as a connoisseur of Imagining Scenarios#i am particularly fond of constructing time travel scenarios in my brain featuring my Characters of choice#in this case my best friend my chew toy ms valkyrie cain#so i was reading the book slow. spending my spare time imagining scenarios where valkyrie time travels back to enter this narrative#IMAGINE MY SURPRISE#when HALFWAY THROUGH THE BOOK#one of the mysterious masked characters is revealed to be VALKYRIE CAIN TIME TRAVELLED BACK FROM THE FUTURE#my scenarios!!!!! my little scenarios!!!! they happened in the book!!!!!#anyway im so beyond over the moon. that book was so sexy. ive got to reread the series now.#ive got to put valkyrie cain in my mouth and suck on her like a hard candy (NOT SEXUAL!!!!)#i feeel like a dog tearing apart a much beloved chew toy. except the chew toy. is Character#i need to find one of the og series books where valkyrie murders the most people and then i need to eat it#on god i wish these books got more tumblr fame because they fuck like hell. i mean. i love percy jackson as much as the next guy#but i feel like tumblr would eat the sp series up#like. its about a skeleton detective and the world's most violent teenage girl and theyre so platonically obsessed with each other#that theyd both blow the world up in defence of the other.#and also both of them have the magical potential of a nuclear bomb and are trying sososo hard all the time to not just snap#and kill everyone in a ten mile radius. but also they're not good people and they love violence so muc h#god i really did read some extremely violent books as a teen/preteen#at least skulduggery pleasant was aimed at that age group. i was also obsessed with the valhalla trilogy and. dear lord. dear lord
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