#but like they always see each other when they're back home and it rekindles feelings a lil

[blcssom]

closed starter for @angclnumber + open m/f/nb based on: spotify starter call ( still accepting )

there she is again // beside the fountain lookin’ out // upon the people here // it’s awfully clear // she’s haunting me and honestly // i’m honored to be haunted // by the likes of she // lucky me - ghost of chicago || noah floersch

she’s not sure why she’s not expecting to see them when she enters the same dive bar she’s been sneaking into since their senior year, but as always the sight of them takes her breath away. “hey, stranger.” as though they aren’t the one person in this town she knows almost as well as herself. “i didn’t know you were back in town.”

[hrts4hanniehae]

Take a Chance with Me || fourteen

*mostly written parts

remember to comment and reblog

it was quite obvious that yn and seungcheol would be invited to numerous interviews. and of course, they went to most of them.

"so who liked who first?"

"we first met when we were trainees because yn's younger brother and childhood friend were friends with our maknae, Dino. yn was a trainee under a different company and... was his name Jae? I'm sorry but my memory of him is very fuzzy. I believe Jae was a trainee with us until he dropped out due to health issues."

"so we knew each other from the start of our trainee days and I debuted the same year as them, so we were quite close, I would say. But I think I fell first."

"no, i definitely did."

the interviewer sat up in her seat. "really? why is that so?"

seungcheol grasped yn's hand. "it was in 2014 when we were meeting up together with the other 95 liners in Seventeen. yn was wearing this winter coat that made her so pretty. I fell instantly. you can ask jeonghan, he'd be more than happy to embarrass me."

this was news to yn, who couldn't help but smile. "so you did fall first."

"so when did you fall for him, yn-sshi."

"when i first saw him perform during one of his dance practices. his presence was so strong and i don't know... he was so attractive."

seungcheol flushed red.

yn was at svt's dorm, celebrating her rekindled relationship with seungcheol.

"finally you both are together again. after 3 long years."

"thanks to hoshi actually. he sped the process up by a lot."

"noona, we should do a weverse live right now."

"yea, we should."

their weverse live hit record-high views. the app almost crashed. everyone was so curious to see domestic, drunk yncheol.

"hi guys. yn is super drunk and is having a mini concert with hoshi." - mingyu

"they've sung "just do it" 15 times. someone please stop them." - scoups

"wait they're singing yn's album songs now." - joshua

"oh my god i don't want to hear a drunk version of Oceans and Engines..." - jun

"stop hoshi before he ruins Take a Chance with Me" - minghao

"no wait i want to hear this." - jeonghan

"now hoshi is crying..." - wonwoo

"jihoon-ahhhhhhhhh" - hoshi

"no hoshi..." - woozi

"why is yn still singing... now she's crying... scoups!" - seungkwan

"on it." - scoups

"i'm so sorry for this me-"

"HORANGHAE." - hoshi

"..." - svt

"mianhae" - minghao

"everything okay, yn?"

"yea. i finally feel like... i'm home."

he pulled her in for a kiss. "i'm glad you feel this way. maybe now you'll continue writing those good love songs about me?"

she laughed. "we'll see, cheol. but thank you for... taking a chance with me."

now he laughed. "was that supposed to be a joke?"

"no, i meant it. I love you."

"i love you too."

-fin-

a/n THANK YOU FOR FOLLOWING "TAKE A CHANCE WITH ME" AHHHH!!! my first ever smau and kinda long fic. omfg thank you for all the love on this. i'm so so grateful. stay tuned for chpt fifteen, the epilogue. i have something special planned. special thank you to those who always commented/reblogged my posts. yall have a special place in my heart!!!!

note to my taglist: please reblog and comment abt the chpt so i know that you're actually reading my stuff.

summary: 3 years after your breakup with seungcheol, you release an album to cope with your still-broken heart. you didn't expose his name but quickly, your fans and fans of svt begin to connect the dots to the past you wish you could relive. little did you know, the man you loved so desperately would begin to chase you back with the same desperation you so very much desired

inspired by: take a chance with me

pairing: idol!choi seungcheol × fem!idol!reader

genre: past relationship, fluff, angst, best friend!booseoksoon, smau, miscommunication, pining, 2nd chance

warnings: implied self harm/depression, hate comments, updates irregular but will finish because i cried when i thought abt this idea

started: 13.12.23

taglist: fill out the form in my pinned post to be added to the taglist (specify this smau in the pw section)

smau masterlist

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tags! @fairyofhour @megseungmin @sun-daddy-yoriichi @woozixo @euphoric-univers @christinewithluv @haowonbins @ocyeanicc @asyre @cynthiaaax13 @superhoshisvt @bangantokchy @chimmy-bts @angelarin @daisawa @writingbarnes @jeonghansshitester

@belladaises @wonwootakemyheart @wonwooz1 @luchiet @atinybitlonely @kookssecret @caratsland @peachescreamandcrumble @thepoopdokyeomtouched @isabellah29 @leah-rose03 @coupskook

[quinloki]

Sooo imagine reader/ y/n escapes, they get to an island for a couple months evade capture but then marinford happens and the wb pirates are disbanded/scatters or doin there own thing but one of them end up on the same island as y/n with the obsession still intact and finding them again has rekindled it even more.

How would they react on when they're alone without the other's input?would they contact each other and group up? what would be going through their heads?

(yan au where everyone survives except wb)

💧-anon

(feel free to completely ignore my ramblings but i have so many things i think ab and need to tell/ask ❤️)

I feel how someone would react would depend on the crew member. I'm not going to hit up everyone, just my usual suspects, so bear with me.

CW: Yandere, dub con / non con vibes, nothing explicit a lot of what ifs and summaries.

Marco would not contact anyone else. I love this man, but Yandere Marco is POSSESSIVE. He shares you with his brothers only because they are his brothers. If no one else ended up on this island with you and him then that's a them problem, and not HIS problem.

Depending on the manner of your escape would depend how Marco was, but regardless of if he thinks you left or were stolen away, he'll be delighted to have you back. You'll never leave his sight again, and if you do have to be away from him for any reason he'll make sure he knows where you are.

You will drown in him, whether its his love or his anger, but he will mark you, fill you up, and leave you exhausted and delirious more than not.

Ace would contact the others. He'd be so relieved to see you safe, and whether anyone else thought you left, he'd be convinced it had to be against your will. He'll be seeking reassurance to that end, and if you're smart you're going to give it to him. Shore up your story if you need it with Ace's help, because the other will be far harder to convince, even if what you're telling is the truth.

Whatever happens, and however things play out though, you'll always run into Ace. He'll pop out of the ground like a fucking daisy sometimes, scaring the hell out of you even though that wasn't his intent. But playful or endearing, don't think for a second it's accidental.

If you don't reassure him, if you do tell him you left because you wanted to, his reaction will be worse. He'll claim you as his and you'll probably have burn scars by the time the others arrive. It'll take Marco weeks to get you back into some sort of semblance of who you were - assuming he can even soothe the scars.

Thatch will let you set the narrative, and hell he'll even let you decide if he reaches out to anyone else or not. If you want to elope with just him, he'd be more than happy to oblige. He doesn't mind sharing with his brothers, but he won't deny such a heart felt confession and plea from you either.

He's likely to do to you what Marco would, making love to you until you're a pile of mush, exhausted and almost out of your mind. His stamina far exceeds your own, and he has months of catching up to do, he's missed you so much. And don't worry, he'll feed you and make sure you're hydrated, even clean your home, and earn money, you'll be too tired to worry about any of that anyway.

With Izou in the mix the rope burns on your joints are apt to become permanent. It doesn't matter if you say you didn't want to leave, you'll never be able to be taken away so easily ever again. He'll let the others know about you, and your fate will probably be decided by committee.

You will be under the influence of something when you're questioned, so unless you're really good at lying that's not going to be an option here. You're likely to survive your punishment, for better or worse, but whatever island you end up on with everyone (whoever constitutes everyone), the islanders are going to understand your position in the crew. Or misunderstand it.

but the only friends you'll have will be the brothers that take care of you. You'll want for nothing, save maybe freedom.

[nightmarettd]

Ships that are my Roman Empires and why

Ricky and Gina - High School Musical The Musical The Series

They're actually my babies. Just the way they were written both as individual characters and as a relationship was amazing especially from High School Musical! I'm far from a theatre kid i'm more of a film nerd but i love this show and how chaotic it is. I love how they went from two strangers bonding over their similar home lives and feelings to developing feelings but Ricky's relationship with Nini and his tendency to fall into familiar things got in the way. And then the entirety of Season 2 they were secretly pining for each other and then of course Ricky looses Gina to EJ cause he realised to late he loved her, like my god its so juicy!!! Than they both rekindle their connection in season 3 and realise they love each other and kiss and then season 4 was just their season and they ended perfectly my endgame and one of my fav ships!

Amerie and Malakai - Heartbreak High

Seeing an Australian love story just feels so fresh and Authentic for me as an Australian. I adore these two, Malakai is my favourite Heartbreak High character tied with Quinni but i love Amerie and she is one of my favs too. Their chemistry is just so authentic and beautiful and the way they look at each other!!! god!! I love the way their story unraveled and i will riot if they don't end up together next season. They also make me cry because like every time they try to be together the timing is never right. I love Malakai being the new kid that Amerie fell for because he was so kind and nice to her, when no one else but Darren and Quinni would be. I do love their storylines but god i hated that he cheated on her when they had just got together but i don't blame him entirely because of the state he was in and i believe he was taken advantage of. I love the storyline of him exploring his sexuality although he definitely shouldn't have led Amerie on if he was attracted to someone else. I love that he discovered himself and realised that he was attracted to Rowan but loved Amerie. (and i am definitely not saying a bi person can't love a person of the same gender because that's homophobic and stupid). And my god them having an abortion that storyline was so good, and Malakai was so accepting of her choice and supportive of her which is a refreshing thing to see. And i love the way they handled it showoing that Amerie immediately didn't want it and made that choice which i think will give a lot of girls courage to stand up for themselves and their choices with their body's. The season 2 Finale had me crying him leaving without telling her realising he's in love with her and leaving her a letter that got burnt and Amerie learning he's gone and admitting that she still loved him and had loved him since they first got together like they're breaking my heart here and the ending of her looking up into the sky and him crying on the plane! i just think about them all the time.

Dick and Kori - DC Comics

They are my babies and i hate how DC has ruined them. The way they met is so cute. And their 80's Era they were so in love! and they always will love each other and need to get back together Barbara and Dick are not it. Kori is one of my fav DC characters and Dick need to realise how lucky he was to have her. I don't know what else to say except that i hate how they ended and DC trying to push the agenda that they don't love each other like come on!!

Brooke and Lucas - One Tree Hill

God i love these two since i was fourteen. The fact he went form having a crush on her best friend to falling in love with her. They were the perfect opposites attract trope and their chemistry!!! don't get me started. Their angst was unmatched as well. Season 2 and Season 3 were their seasons and i did not watch season 4 because i hate Leyton and Peyton. Like my god their pining era in season 2 and then their trust issues and finally getting together in season 3 all for Peyton and the writers to end them. Anyways i think about them all the time.

Lucy Gray and Snow - The Ballad Of Songbirds and Snakes

These two break my heart, and i know i know they are toxic but like my god their story. Like my god and i know Snow wanted to own her and all that but i just think they are the perfect example of how the world can destroy people. And the fact he choose power over her like come on dude come on!

Anika and Mindy - Scream VI

My god they make me cry. Like why? i know they had such little screen time but they were so adorable and ended so tragically. Like what do you mean Mindy who was almost murdered and has trust issues because of her supposed friend and then had to watch the girl she loved get brutally stabbed and fall to her death like what. They are the real Romeo and Juliet like come on!!!

Percy and Annabeth - Show and Books

Do i really have to explain this? they were my parents when i read the books at like 7 and now that show came out their my babies. Their chemistry and story is one of the best ever. Like they don't like each other at first but become close through experiences and similarities they bond over and grow to care for each other deeply. Than they realise their in love and both give up immortality for each other, Like ahhh! And then their storylines in Heroes of Olympus just solidifies their love for one another and i never stop thinking about them.

[beaniebeensbaby201]

DANCING WITH OUR HANDS TIED (HANGMAN X READER)

A/N: SORRY I have been very busy, and I hadn't been wanting to write in a while. Lately I have been reading many Top Gun fanfics the last few days so I decided to make a mini series. I'll try to update every other day or so.

Summary:

Hailey "Frost" Bradshaw has always known what she wanted to do with her life. To be like her father, to become the best pilot alongside her brother.

When she's called back to Top Gun, everything changes, including her feelings for a certain pilot. Jake "Hangman" Seresin. A cocky, arrogant asshole who knew how to get under her skin. What will happen once the two rekindled and this mission is more dangerous than the other thought? Will they finally admit they're love for one another, or will they still pretend the facade that they're keeping just so they don't hurt each other?

Characters name: Hailey Bradshaw. Her cosign name is Frost.

I'm gonna make a masterlist once chapter two is published. Chapter two will be published tomorrow night. Maybe around ten PM or so, at least for America.

Brie larson is Hailey btw.

CHAPTER ONE

Hailey was with her best friend as they sat in the blue bronco.

"I don't want to see him." Hailey looked over at Bradley, her father told her that Maverick was coming to Top Gun.

Ever since Maverick pulled Rooster's papers, the two have gotten closer. They both despised Maverick for what he's done.

"We'll ignore him, you my love make sure you keep your anger at bay." Bradley glared at Hailey, only for the blonde girl to give him a stern look.

"What about you and Hangman? You two are always at each other's throats." Hailey opened her mouth, as her eyes widened.

"Nothings going on between me and that jackoff. He's a total prick, he just gets on my nerves!" The girl exclaimed, her voice going a higher octave than normal.

Bradley couldn't help but smirk, her face getting red. Whenever she was frustrated she'd always talk with her hands, and she would always babble whenever she didn't like something, or when she was nervous.

"C'mon, let's not hold them up anymore." Rooster said, cutting off the frustrated woman.

Hailey let out a loud groan of annoyance. Her head hitting the dashboard, but obliged and got out of the Ford bronco.

The two entered the hard deck together. In just a few minutes the hard deck will be crowded with men in uniforms, Penny, the admiral's daughter, decided to take over as the new owner. She had owned this bar for a few years now, and it basically became her home whenever she'd visit her Uncle.

Bradley went over to the pool table, Hailey noticed Maverick but she made sure not to make any sort of eye contact. Hailey leaned into Bradley as the two headed over to their friends.

"She looks just like Carole." Maverick asked Penny, as the two adults watched how the two of them were close.

"She also has humor like her father. She has his laugh." Maverick's lip twitched up into a small smile, as he looked at the twins.

"Bagman." Her voice was laced with distastate.

Her and Rooster were the only two with no uniforms on, but in regular outfits.

Hangman was at least a foot taller than her, causing Hailey to crane her neck up in order to look at him. He had the same smirk, she can't recall a moment where she hadn't seen him with that same smirk. It's almost as if he didn't have any other smiles.

"Bradshaw, as I live and breathe." Hailey rolled her eyes at the arrogant, yet hot asshole.

"Bagman, I'm surprised they called you in." Hangman crossed his arms over his chest, getting closer to the girl.

Phoenix was standing next to Rooster.

"How long are they going to keep this up for?" Rooster shrugged, watching his best friend and their enemy in a heated staring contest.

"Well, I am the best sweetheart." Hailey couldn't help but snort.

"You're the best?" Hailey couldn't help but let out a laugh. Maverick couldn't help but look over at them, she did have his laugh.

"You let those around you die, you really think you're the best pilot here?" Even if it was a little harsh, it was true.

"Sooo, anyways. Does anyone know what this special detachment is all about?" Payback asked, wanting to ease the tension in the room.

"A mission, a mission. That doesn't confront me, what I wanna know is the team leader. And which all yall have what it takes to follow me?" The two twins looked at one another, they both knew that Hangman was not going to be the leader of the team. If anything it would be an early death.

"You'd kill us all, Seresin. You don't have what it takes to be a leader, and like I said before, you kill those around you." Her voice was cold, the reason why they called her Frost.

That's the difference between her and her brother. She didn't care about the consequences of her words, or her actions. But she knew how to be safe while breaking the rules like her Uncle Maverick. Hangman himself knew that she was more fit as the leader, but he wouldn't ever admit it out loud.

"Why would they have you as leader? You think you're that great of a pilot, you could admit, you think you're the best. But I feel like if you were the leader we'd just run out." Hailey couldn't help but slap him across the cheek. She let him win, she allowed him to anger her with his words.

"You're a prick." Her voice was low, as she leaned closer to his face. Enough for her to smell the beer that he had just finished on his breath.

A song played in the distance, Hangman still had that smirk plastered across his lips. She wonders if his mouth ever hurted from always being in a smirk, but she didn't bother asking.

"I love this song!" He leaned down to kiss her cheek. She was quick to rub it off and had a disgusted look on her face.

"Ugh, I can't stand him." Phoenix stood next to her, a soft chuckle escaped her lips as she saw her basically rub off her makeup from Jake's lips on her cheek.

Hailey leaves to go to Payback and play some darts where Hangman was. Both Phoenix and her brother looked at the way the two nemesis were.

"I bet you 100 bucks that they'll get together by the end of this mission." Phoenix was the first to speak, knowing that the two were both thinking the same thing.

"Make it 300 pushups." Bradley couldn't help himself. He always found his sister's love life entertaining, especially when it involved the most insufferable man in the world.

"You're on." The two bumped fists as Bradley takes a sip of his half empty bottle of beer.

[swimmingwolf59]

Okay. I've just about finished rereading yotsuba and I HAVE to ramble about Yanda and Koiwai's relationship because it is utterly baffling to me. (And it doesn't help that Koiwai always describes his relationships with people so vaguely lol)

When I first read yotsuba, I accepted Koiwai's vague description of Yanda as "my junior" to mean he's someone who started later than Koiwai at the same company, and they haven't known each other for very long. But upon my reread, I've realized that can't possibly be the case.

Yanda is first mentioned in CHAPTER ONE - that blew me away when I saw that. Koiwai asks Jumbo where Yanda is and Jumbo tells him that something came up and he can't make it (and that he's worthless lol). So apparently Yanda is close enough to both of them that he was expected to help Koiwai move and to give Jumbo that update, not Koiwai.

AND IT'S NOT JUST THAT. In the yakiniku chapter, Jumbo brings up someone who Koiwai says "he hasn't seen in a long time." Yanda also seems to know this person. In the camping chapter, when Yanda shows up on his scooter, Koiwai says "You're still riding this thing? That takes me back!" Both of these things seem to imply that Yanda has been part of the group for a while. Also, Koiwai's mom knows Yanda by name.

So my new conclusion is that Yanda is actually a pretty close member of the friend group, and they've been friends for a long time.

So now, the truly baffling part - he has never met Yotsuba. She doesn't know him, and he doesn't know her. He can't even remember her name. When he first meets her, he's surprised to see her answer the door! How can a close friend of Koiwai's not know his daughter lol???? Jumbo has obviously known her her whole life.

My theory is that Koiwai and Yanda met in college, maybe they were in the same department or even while Koiwai was a grad student and Yanda was in undergrad (making stuff up, but Yanda has always seemed much younger than Koiwai). They became good friends, enough that Yanda joined the friend group with Jumbo and met Koiwai's parents. But after graduating, Koiwai began working abroad, presumably where he got Yotsuba, or maybe he worked in a few different places. Regardless, I don't think Yanda would've had enough money to visit him. As he is now, he eats cup ramen all the time and apparently doesn't have access to hot water (???), the guy may even be living out of his car for all we know lol, but I don't think he has a lot of money. I don't think he would've then, either. So he didn't see Koiwai while he was abroad. Even when he came back to Japan, I feel like Koiwai might have lived at home with his parents until he was able to rent this current house. His mom knows the person who's renting to them, talks about them as if they're a friend, which makes me think she helped him get that current house. And considering the fact that they don't visit each other often, Koiwai's family home might not be very close. So, again, Yanda couldn't feasibly visit that often. Now that Koiwai's a lot closer though they can hang out again, hooray! Time to finally meet that daughter he's heard about and obviously wasn't paying attention at all when Koiwai talked about her! (Though it's still baffling to me that Yanda just shows up one day to have lunch without even announcing he's coming over but anyway LMAO.)

I love them. I love thinking about them. Mainly because it makes no sense so it's fun having like a conspiracy theory board trying to figure this out LMAO.

If you want my insane theory, Koiwai and Yanda dated in college but broke up six or more years ago (hence why Koiwai's mom knows him and Jumbo complains about him like that close friend who hates their friend's partner but can't trash talk them until they break up). HOWEVER Koiwai is the only one who knows they broke up, Yanda missed the memo (it happened in the yakiniku chapter, he has a track record lol), and now he's trying to rekindle the romance by showing up for lunch all the time. I may or may not be writing a fic about this.

[mysmorgasbordoffantabulosa]

Ok, so I've been thinking a lot about tae's last live and would appreciate it if you could humor me a bit. This will be long (sorry) I just have a lot on my mind

I don't know much about their apartment situation or layout, but what I'm assuming is that tae was at jungkook's apartment.

Tae has made it clear he doesn't work out, so why would he have a home gym

If it was his apartment, then I find it odd that he did the live in that room specifically, especially since he ended the live after he opened the door (we know someone was over). From previous lives, we know if he has ppl over then he goes to his room, so why not this time? 🤨

What I've been seeing people talk about from this live is a picture in the background that supposedly has the face covered. Some people are saying it's jungkook, and some others are saying it's jungkooks trainer. Idk how I feel about that. I kinda feel like ppl are over analyzing that a bit

Anyways, the main thing that's driving me nuts is why does taekook hide?

I just don't understand why. They're coworkers and friends, so all this hiding is just so odd to me. If they are dating, then it's so easy to disguise outtings and being with one another with the friendship/coworker title. I feel like it's more suspicious to be throwing all these subtle hints and trying to make it seem that they aren't at one another's place

I remember reading one of your other asks where someone posted a prediction that taekook are basically back together. I know you said you don't believe it, but I can see that being plausible with how loud and active taekook have been recently. I know a lot of people would like to believe taekook has been together for all these years, but I don't. I strongly feel like there was a period where they broke up/separated.

I know you don't believe in taennie, so I won't waste your time too much lol. There was a blind item talking about jennie cheating on her bf. The person who talked about it claimed it was about jennie and gd, but the blind item stated something about the bf going to the military soon. This obviously makes it about tae. There's just too many coincidences with the photos. My theory is taennie broke up and taekook rekindled things.

It's Tae's apartment:

He's been using this room for Instagram stories for a while now, always focusing on the gym equipment.

Now whilst Tae doesn't do gym stuff generally, it's clear he works out but to have all that equipment is weird for me. That's why I agree that it's mostly there for JK and Tae occasionally will use as when he feels like being gym fit.

And this...

Just makes me think if BT21 Cookie, perhaps it's someone wearing the headpiece... perhaps JK?

I don't think it's out of the realms of possibility that Taekook have been mostly together since 2016, but I know about the other theories, but when I look at content, even the edited stuff, I can't see the correlation. But each to their own I suppose.

As for Taennie, there was another blind that suggested that Jennie had a Chebeol's son as boyfriend. As well as a fake blind about Taekook contract issues. I feel unless their coming out of KNetz forum K Pop blinds should be taken with a huge pinch of salt.

[cowboyhorsegirl]

Tony loves the gentle and sweet kisses Steve gives him constantly, but he’s like something a little spicier once their in bed and yet Steve seems either to twitterpated OR to scared of hurting him to do more then nibble while they do what can only be described as “make tender love”

much to Tony’s frustration

Is this due to:

A) angsty “Steve was way more down to get physical and down and dirty BEFORE Civil War and is way more gentle post because he scared of hurting him again” type issues

B) fuffy “Steve just really likes to be sweet to Tony because that’s just how he be” reasons

ohhhhh this is absolutely delicious 😈😈😈

i think it's a little bit of both. like we have to remember that steve is probably achingly gentle with anyone he takes to bed because he has to be. this man is so strong, he can't afford to lose himself in the moment and let go because there's a very real chance he could hurt the person he's with badly if he does.

so before CW, i imagine that it takes some time for them to figure out the limits and boundaries of what they want to get and are willing to give to each other in a way that's satisfying for them both. don't get me wrong, i think their sex is always enjoyable, even when it's simple because they do love each other and they've wanted each other for so long, so to have anything at all after so long resigning themselves to nothing is in itself an almost unbelievable thrill.

but tony can't help the flashes of annoyance he feels sometimes when he tries to bite down on steve's lip and gets only tender, slow and gentle kisses in return. he tries to spur steve on, begging him please to go faster, harder, rougher to no avail. tony jumps to the assumption that steve is treating him like glass because he thinks tony is weak and broken and scarred and that he can't handle anything more than the absolute sweetest of sex. it hurts, that the man he loves apparently thinks so little of him. he's a superhero for crying out loud, he knows that he can take a few bruises in bed and more than that, he wants to.

meanwhile, steve is just so overwhelmed with how happy he is to be with tony. he's lost so much—so many people that he loved—and he's well aware that he can't protect tony from everything, but he'll be damned if he can't even protect tony from his own super strength.

when tony first broaches the topic that he'd like their sex life to venture into the kinkier side, steve is a bit uncomfortable trying to imagine how he could derive pleasure from hurting tony when his body was only ever bestowed to him to be used as a weapon, to use force as a means to an end. but once tony explains that above the pain, or the domination, or the denial, above all else it's about trust, steve starts to understand the appeal. it's not a coercion, it's a conversation: tony wanting to give steve control because he trusts him, he loves him, and he knows steve would do right by him. and hey, what do you know, the more they indulge in that kind of kinky sex, the more steve finds himself enjoying it for himself beyond just the fact that he loves seeing the way tony gets delirious and blissed out when they play like that.

after CW, however, i think that they both make the mistake of trying to jump back into sex the way it was before even though in most other aspects of their relationship they take their time to reestablish their trust in one another in the aftermath of the harm they've levelled against each other. So yeah, months after the Accords are finally resolved and the Rogue Avengers get to come home, Steve and Tony begin to rekindle their romance. in the beginning, everything—every small touch and shared space—is a painstaking negotiation, a careful reconstruction of intimacy that used to come so naturally. and it's hard work and it's frustrating and there are days when they feel like they're going backwards instead of forwards, both of them relearning how to be okay with voicing their discontents with each other once again, but slowly, slowly it does get easier.

It's not until a few weeks after they start dating again that they try to have sex, and the first time is honestly a bit of a disaster. they fall back into their bad communication habits, tired from all the effort it's taken to rebuild their relationship thus far, confident that all the work they put into discussing their sex life before their falling out will hold up now, and above all, so so desperate to touch one other like this after so long without, desperate for the sex to just work that they both jump in headfirst.

steve is the one who offers to take things a little bit rougher, asking tony if that's what he wants tonight, and he steadfastly pushes down on the panicked voice inside his head that insists he'd actually rather die than hurt tony in any way ever again and he takes deep breaths to try and slow the way his heart races in fear at the thought of seeing tony beneath him, face twisted in pain. he offers because he thinks that his own trauma doesn't matter, if it means giving tony something he likes again.

tony is the one who accepts, his enthusiasm a little too loud, a little too forced when he immediately says yes. he says yes, and he tries in vain to remind himself of all the things he taught steve so long ago, that it's not about pain or punishment or revenge, that steve is doing this to him because this is what trust looks like, remember tony? he accepts because he thinks he would be admitting fault, admitting weakness if he confesses that he doesn't want to experience love like this, not anymore.

they don't actually get very far that night, both of their facades crumbling under the emotional intensity of it all, but they make it through the resulting hurt and panic and guilt together, wrapped up in each other's arms with reassurances of love and promises that the next time will be gentler, as gentle as they can be for each other.

[loorain]

Sims 4 Fontenot Legacy - Rekindling

Beau: ...Sabrina?

Sabrina: Hi, Beau. Long time no see.

Beau: That's the understatement of the century. It's good to see you.

Sabrina: Thanks. I like the haircut. No more mullet for you, huh?

Beau: It was time for a change. Shedding the past. I'm not the only one with a new hairstyle though. Growing your hair out?

Sabrina: Eh, just letting it do whatever feels right. Maybe I'll chop it all off after this. Who knows.

Beau: I always admired your free spirit.

Beau: So anyways, what brings you out tonight?

Sabrina: Just enjoying a night out. Things have been crazy lately. Lots of changes...

Beau: ...Good changes?

Sabrina: Yeah. Just... a lot has happened. A lot.

Beau: Sounds like it.

Sabrina: What about you? Anything exciting happening in your life?

Beau: Just work. My life's not nearly as exciting these days. I've kinda settled down now.

Sabrina: Oh cool. Settled down... with someone?

It's a little too on the nose, but Sabrina doesn't care. The drinks are flowing through their veins, and they're feeling bold.

Beau: Nah. Just hasn't been the right person. What about you?

Sabrina: No commitments. Just casual stuff. I preferred it that way. Just needed time, you know?

Beau: I know what you mean.

The two chat for some time, Sabrina completely forgetting about Marquise. Even though their last conversation ended on rocky terms, the two just seem to pick up where they left off. After awkward reintroductions, they're back to playful banter and relaxed discourse. You would think they hadn't spent so much time apart.

There's a look in their eyes. Familiarity. Longing. The past flashes through their expressions, and it's truly like no time has passed between them. Maybe it's the drinks, but Sabrina feels bold. Not only that. They feel... at home.

Sabrina: Wanna get some fresh air?

Beau: It's been really nice talking to you again. Feels like old times.

Sabrina: I know. Makes me think about how it ended before...

Beau: Sabrina, I really wasn't lying to you. I didn't send that text.

Sabrina: Yeah. I know. It's just... I really was going through a lot. Nyla was going through a lot. She had just found out she was pregnant, and I was preparing to drop everything and help her, and then she disappeared. I was trying to finish up the semester and I was just burned out. I lost my Uncle Armani shortly after. That text in the middle of everything else... it was too much.

Beau: Sabrina... I had no idea.

Sabrina: Beau, I just want you to know, I don't regret our time together. It was wild and fast, but magical. I only wished we could have seen where it went. If only the events that transpired hadn't happened.

Beau: Well, there's always the future, right? I mean, if that's what you want.

Sabrina: Is it what you want? You were pretty adamant about not wanting to wait for me when we last spoke.

Beau: I was hurt. Confused. I thought I was doing the right thing to protect my heart. But if this can have a future potentially, I'd like to see it through this time.

Sabrina: Beau... I've missed you.

Beau: I missed you too.

Beau: We can take our time this time. There's no rush. Really get to know each other. Tell each other everything upfront this time.

Sabrina: I... I want that.

The gap between them closes. Marquise, Alton, Gideon, even Bernard are far from Sabrina's mind now. This feels right. Like home.

Being in Beau's embrace again makes Sabrina's heart swell. They're convinced Beau can feel it pounding in their chest. Unbeknownst to them, Beau's own heart is puttering at the same rate.

Beau: Let's do this again soon?

Sabrina: I'd like that.

[boycigs]

RELATIONS !

bibi's note; this is to show everybody my self inserts has befriended/loved (?)

Bibiyana Kovaćevič ; (kaya ship)

Kazutora Hanemiya; a little brother/child figure, they've known each other since 2002. bibyana or otherwise known to her community as bibi takes care of him as her own sibling/child.

Blitzo; her little brother, he was always out and about rarely coming home some nights as he spent his time with baji and hanma.

Keisuke Baji; while there isn't much interaction between bibi and baji, she looked after him when he, kazutora, and blitz would hang out. she treats him as her child, someone to look after. bibyana has spoken to ryoko a few time. visited his grave after she and blitzo got reunited.

Takeomi Akashi; a comfort person, turned lover for bibi, when she was in a bad spot she happen to meet him and his sister. senju, seeing Itty bitty sparks decided to play cupid ! and it took off from there.

Sanzu Haruchiyo; nothing more then a 'hi' here, a bento there and a quick plug hookup. though it turns into bibi making sure sanzu eats and he gives her weed and facts about takeomi. she has gotten mistaken as sanzu's gf.

Senju Karawagi; simply a good female friend, bibyana see's her as a younger sister! they hangout every so often, visiting cafe's, shopping, senju trying to get bibi to introduce her into witchcraft.

Blitzo ; (shuzo ship)

Hanma Shuji; anything, everything. a soul mate, twin flame, whatever you call it. shuji's been with blitzo for a while, knowing him like the back of his hand.

Bibyana Kovaćevič; his older sister, blitz went MIA after bloody halloween. took a while for bibi to find him again and rekindle their relationship.

Kazutora Hanemiya; To say 'friends' is a lot. they hung out but blitzo liked hanging with baji and tora just ended up coming along. blitz grew a resentment for him because his sister took him in like a stray cat, taking his sisters time away from him. strong dislike but they came to make up.

Keisuke Baji; nothing much actually, they were friends as kids but bloody halloween happened,, blitzo shut down feeling extremely guilty.

Manjiro Sano; boss of bonten in the future, though he holds a grudge at blitz for disapearing/changing sides after bloody halloween. Blitz doesn't know how to approach him.

Sanzu Haruchiyo; a fellow junkie, one looks after the other if they tend to go to far and if they're both out of it rindou is dealing with their asses. probably slept together once or twice 🤪

Hajime Kokonoi; Blitzo uses him to get more money outta gambling. like an investment, blitz borrows money to gamble, plays a couple games, gives back whatever they borrowed and keeps whatever they won.

[raayllum]

what if their reunion is a bit more like stoic and valka still with angst but a bit happier

Although very sweet, I've never thought their reunion would be so heartfelt (except perhaps if Callum and Rayla had been separated for 20 years and even then). I think at most Callum will be relieved to see her, they'll exchange like 3 sentences, and then he'll immediately be pissed because she left him and now she's come crawling back, unharmed. If you want more thoughts about why / what I think their reunion may be like you can check out this post.

Before I thought they might reconcile quicker, but the more I think about it and what we know of Callum's character, presumptive Aaravos-Callum connection promo art, as well as season structure...

TDP is all about highlighting growth in big ways. It's one of the reasons why despite having only 27 episodes, it feels like by the end of S2 all the characters were radically different people than they were at the start of S1, and even more different from the start of S3 to the end of S3.

So for the beginning of S4 we have Callum, passive, staying back at the castle, somewhat denying his feelings for Rayla, unable to say them out loud, trying to distract himself, to resign himself to the fact she'll never come back yet also desperately wanting to see her again because like, he still loves her.

Then we have him being angry at her, expressing at least some of his hurt. Still, probably denying his feelings and some of what's laying at the heart of his anger: that she scared him, that he worried, that he wanted / wants to help her, to keep her safe. The pain of losing her for two years.

And this is, actually, the best grounds for something like Cube Hostage Exchange Theory to take hold. After a season of being stubborn and also slowly rekindling what they had (because it's Rayla, and she's his best friend, and they're always going to care about each other even when one or both of them is trying not to), Callum is separated from / loses her. Again. Something in him snaps.

Therefore, his character arc would take him from:

Sitting passively at home -> actively going after her this time

Stewing in his anger -> "It doesn't matter what you did before, I just want you to be okay again" and releasing the bulk / all of it

A reunion where he's mostly unhappy to see her -> a second reunion where he's so incredibly happy / relieved to see her (if also worried)

Denying / not saying his feelings out loud -> wearing his heart on his sleeve and stating it out loud to everyone / anyone / to her

Denying himself / his love / half truths -> Reconnecting with himself, his love, and his full truth (and possibly the Moon arcanum?)

And it would work beautifully, I think.

[shadowgirl138]

Pouge Princess Chapter 1

(Rafe Cameron x Reader)

A/n: Thank you guys so much for all the likes on my pouge princess blurb 🥲🥰 This has really helped rekindle my love for writing and I can't wait to share more with everyone. I hope you all enjoy the official first chapter 😁

Word count : 2,227

Warning ⚠️: swearing, mention of sex and drugs, drinking, Rafe being a dick (are we really shocked about that in a rafe cameron fanfic)

The best job to have on the whole island had to be working at one of the county clubs. Simply for the fact that there was no such thing as a bad tip day. It was totally worth watching stuck up seniors and spoiled kooks play golf all day because you knew you'd go home with plenty of money in your pocket.

The only real con was you'd be stuck serving people that you have to see at school once the summer ends. Most of the kids at school do summer internships or at most are forced to "work" part time at their parents' jobs. No one you knew in figure 8 had to work a real job. On the cut almost everyone you knew had a job it was the only way most kids could stay afloat there was nothing odd about it.

But when you are in figure 8 It was one of the things that made you feel embarrassed, having to serve the same people you call your friends at school reminded you that your diffrent. Today was a prime example of that your manager told you that you were personally requested for a party of 3 on the course. When you pulled up at the first hole you saw none other than Rafe, Kelce and Topper.

"Well look at this isn't it nice that everyone's favorite little baby doll finally decided to grace our presents." Rafe shouted leaning against his club arms crossed.

"Come on man don't start already " Topper said, hitting the tall blonde upside his head.

If there was anyone besides Sarah you could count on it would be Topper. He was always there to be your knight in shining armor and the only one that could truly put Rafe in his place besides Ward.

"No it's fine Top, you guys are practically giving me a chance to hang out instead of work today. So you wanna get started I'll get the drinks going?"

You couldn't help but to bounce up as you passed the drinks, Rafe snatched the beer from your hand eyeing you when you waited to give Topper his drink. He couldn't help but notice the way your hand lingered longer than it should when you passed a beer to Topper.

Hole after hole you followed the boys as they played watching as they'd talk shit to each other and slug down more beers.

"Well guess who's finally out of the single guys club. What are you two losers gonna do now that I'll be spending a lot of my time with Anais? " Kelce said with a toothy grin.

Anais is the girl Kelce has been trying to get with for months even coming to you for advice on how to win her over knowing you'd have a better perspectivecompared to Rafe and Topper.

"Oh God don't tell me your pussy whipped already." Rafe couldn't help but to nod his head in disapproval.

"Well there goes our plans for hot boy summer. I'm finally ready to live the single life with you guys and you have the nerve to get cuffed." Topper added 

"Omg Kelce don't listen to these two they're just jealous, congratulations I know how much you really liked her. I'm happy you two are together now its about time." Kelce patted you on the back, his smile never fading.

"I'm glad someone actually cares about me here. Now the real question is when are you finally gonna get yourself a boyfriend (y/n). I think its time you threw yourself out there, you need to get one so we can go on double dates" Kelce said snickering at the sight of your panicked face.

"Um I mean I don't know I guess I just haven't found a guy that really likes me."

The real problem was the guy you liked didn't seem to realize how much you liked him but of course you couldn't tell them that.

"Oh come on there are plenty of people dying at a chance to go out with you (y/n), there hasn't been anyone that sparked your interest ?" Topper chimed in looking over at you.

You felt as if your face turned into a giant stop light with how red you've turned from the conversation.

"Or maybe you're just a prude that thinks she's better than everyone else. That could be why you've never had a boyfriend." Rafe said smirking at the little stink face you gave him.

"It's not that, I mean you've never had a real girlfriend Rafe. Everyone says you're only known for a good hookup, as far as I'm concerned we're basically in the same boat." You retorked wanting desperately for the attention to be off your nonexistent love life.

"That's only because I don't want a girlfriend no one can hold my interest for long. Word must get around that I'm known for great sex if even you know that I'm good for hookups. It's just a fact that I have a BIG presence in the bedroom." Rafe couldn't help himself from putting emphasis on the word big with the way he smirked. "And at least I have experience in the bedroom unlike some people we know little Miss Virgin Mary."

It was common knowledge around the obx that everyones favorite pouge has never had a boyfriend. Everyone also seemed to know that you held onto your v card as well. so it was only natural that Rafe would try to throw it in your face every once in a while to try to get under your skin. 

"You know I think you have it confused Rafe everyone says that you are a big dick not that you have one."

Topper and Kelce turned to each other before erupting in laugher causing Rafe to simply roll his eyes.

"Oh you know what (y/n) my bottle seems to be feeling a little empty mind getting me a refill."

Rafe began to wave his bottle in the air clearly trying to gain control of the situation again. As the laughing died down you made your way over to the cart and handed Rafe another drink. He leaned over to you making sure that Kelce and Topper couldn't hear him.

"If you ever wanna find out if the rumors are true you know where to find me, I think I need to remind you who's in charge here (y/n)."

Rafe couldn't help but to smile as you looked down clearly speechless from his comment. He took this as a silent win before turning his back to go take his turn. A few more rounds where played and the boys could feel themselves getting a little sloppier as each hole progressed and the sun seemed to get dimmer as the hours went on. They all still managed to have a good game going though not letting the fading day and alcohol take them out. Kelce was clearly winning seeing as he had a slightly better tolerance for his alcohol compared to the other two.

At this point Topper decided to sit in your cart and you couldn't help but smile as he looked over at you. "Thanks for coming along today, you know I appreciate you putting up with us all the time." He said ruffling your hair a little with a smile.

"You know I don't mind I like spending time with you guys."

You would be lying if you said you didn't have a little crush on Topper after all these years. You where practically devastated when he started dating Sarah but you couldn't help yourself from feeling mildly happy that the people you cared most about found love in each other. A part of you was relieved when the two of them broke up when Sarah decided to date John B. Even though it was a hard time for all of you, especially being caught in the middle of your two closest friends. You couldn't help but to hold onto a glimmer of hope that maybe after all of this time Topper would stop seeing you as just his childhood best friend. But this was a secret that you'd take to grave not wanting to complicate things or have anyone's feelings hurt explicitly your own.

"Hey Top how about you get your ass up and finish this hole with us? Or are u just gonna talk to the fucking pouge all day, there not paying her to chit chat there paying her to serve us."

Rafe yelled, stepping towards the two of you and resting his arm against the canopy on your side of the cart. Rafe was clearly feeling the affects of all the alcohol he consumed. He only ever became meaner the more he drank. You couldn't help but be grateful this was all he did today knowing that if he had done a few lines then he'd practiclly become a whole new person. Rafe couldn't help but to stare deeply at the two of you with a scrunched up look on his face.

"Come On man just quit it already you've been throwing jabs at (y/n) all day I just wanna have good time. I'm out after this I'm not gonna stick around for you to just be an ass"

Topper pushed himself up walking towards Kelce to take his turn. When Topper was far enough from the cart Rafe leaned in staring you directly in the face making your cheeks flare up at the proximity for the millionth time today.

"What do you want this time Rafe ?" You asked.

"What do I want (y/n) ? Well let's see I want you to stop with the fucking goo goo eyes your always makeing at Topper. You're starting to seem a little pathetic. When are you gonna learn that he just doesn't see you that way."

At this point your body felt like it was on fire and you where doing everything in your power not to let the comment affect you.

"I dont know what your talking about Rafe, Topper is my friend maybe your just not used to seeing a stable relationship between a guy and a girl that doesn't involve sex."

Not the best comeback but it was the only thing you could think of when all you could do was think about was how fast your heart was pounding from his accusations. Obviously they where true but Rafe was the last person you would want to know about your secret feelings towards Topper. Rafe didn't seem like he was backing down yet either and you weren't sure how much of this you could take. You continued to stare at him when suddenly he started to fish in his pockets to reveal a wadded up 100 dollar bill he crumpled it up even further and chucked it in your face watching as it fell perfect in your lap when it hit you.

" What the heck are you doing ?" You said, picking up the crumpled money and holding it in your hand.

"I'm tired of dealing with you so I figured I'd just give you what you came for. Isn't that why you hang out with kooks so you can take our money and show off to your little friends on the cut."

It wasn't the alcohol that was making Rafe act this way it was the sight of seeing you with Topper. It was something that always got under his skin after all these years, he was just able to mask it by blaming it on drugs or his natural hot headed temper.

You could feel tears swelling up in your eyes but couldn't bear to give Rafe the satisfaction of knowing just how deep he cut you. You didn't know why he always felt the need to  remind you that no matter how hard you tried you'd always be diffrent from everyone.

"I don't need your damn money Rafe I get paid regardless if you're here or not, and I'll have you know that Topper asked me to be here. My manager said I was requested to come serve you guys today. I'm just doing my job."

You took the crumpled bill and threw it back at Rafe letting it hit him before falling into the grass."I'm heading back to the club, my shift is ending soon anyway."

Turning the wheel of the cart you started to make your way back to the club not wanting to deal with this any longer then you had too and not wanting everyone to see the tears that started to trickle down your cheeks.

Rafe stumbled back once the cart started to move looking down at the money before glancing over at his confused friends. He couldn't bring himself to admit that he was the one that requested to have you with them today but the fact that you assumed it was Topper had him even more pissed off then before It always had to be about fucking Topper.

"I'm fucking done with today I'm leaving."

In a fit of rage Rafe stormed off throwing his club down before heading back. Deciding he'd rather be alone then have to explain to his friends as to what just happened just now. (Y/n) wasn't the only one harboring an unrequited love for someone that didn't seem to notice them.

Another A/n: Well I hoped you guys liked the official first chaper. I have a lot of ideas circulating on what I'm gonna do :3

[yourmidnightlover]

showing you

Summary: spencer gets a bit insecure with his body but doesn't let reader know until she starts doubting herself. when she figures it out, she makes sure to show spencer just how much she loves him.

TW: spencer's tummy insecurities, blowjob, mommy kink, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, creampie, allusions to sub/dom dynamic i guess?

WC: 3,958

masterlist

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you weren't stupid. you had noticed the change in spencer's behavior. you just didn't really know what was causing it, is all.

after spencer began teaching at georgetown, he started closing himself off a bit. you had visited him while lecturing beforeand you saw how beloved he was, especially by his female students. first you thought about all of those young girls, but then you remembered how that's not the kind of man spencer was.

so now you were back to being confused.

he was more distant than he's been in the past. when you would go to bed and try to cuddle with him, he would just pull away and roll over to the other side. being so understanding, you would let him be, thinking he'd open up when he's ready.

when you would make the two of you dinner on a rare day off from the bureau, he would either barely eat any of it or he'd just go back to the room altogether.

when you both went out with the team he would mostly just remain in the booth. you could usually get him to dance with you a few times before you decided to call it a night, but you couldn't even do that.

and in the bedroom, he would mostly focus on you, which isn't a bad thing at all. it's just... different. you hadn't actually had sex with each other in around three weeks, something you didn't want to push on him because obviously... no. but you couldn't help but wonder why he didn't want to.

you had started thinking, and that could be a scary place for you sometimes. you started thinking maybe he wasn't attracted to you anymore.

it made sense in your mind. the way he wouldn't dance with you anymore, wouldn't sit down for a meal with you, didn't want to have sex anymore, everything. it was the only logical thing you could think of as to why his behavior started to change.

you could either mope around because he's been acting different or now you could rekindle that flame. so you came up with a plan.

"spencer?" you approached him after you got out of the shower, a towel wrapped snug around your torso.

"yea, sweetie?" he asked, looking up from the spot in his book.

"i was thinking..." you trailed off, "we have a couple days off from the bureau and it's been a while since we've had a date night," your aided your eyebrows suggestively.

"you want to have a date night?" he asked in return, sitting up in the bed to get a better look at you.

"mmhmm," you nodded your head enthusiastically as you drew your bottom lip between your teeth.

"how does tonight sound?" he smiled at your reaction. you nodded your head once more. "ok great! i'll make reservations at- y'know what? it'll be a surprise. dress nicely, alright?" he said with a devious grin.

"sir, yes, sir," you smiled, making your way to his side of the bed.

you placed your hands on the sides of his face as he looked up and down your towel clad body, a smirk on his face. you connected your lips gently, surprised when he kissed back as fervently as he did. his hands quickly found your waist, making you chest to chest.

"7:30?" he asked once more, earning a muffled 'mmhmmm' against his lips.

"i'm gonna start getting ready, alright?" you said as you ran your hand through his hair.

"mmkay," he mumbled, his thumbs stroking your sides before you slowly ripped yourself away from him.

since it was already 2 in the afternoon, you had a bit of cushion time to get ready. you decided to wear your natural hair, a feature spencer really liked about you. you also did your makeup pretty natural. you applied a little bit of concealer, powder, bronzer, blush, and mascara.

for clothes, you opted for a white bodycon dress that went mid thigh and had a tiny slit for cleavage.

when you were finally ready, it was just past 7. you stepped out of the bathroom after doing some finishing touches on your hair and stepping into some white pumps.

you made your way into your shared bedroom, slowly running your hand along the doorframe as you admired the view in front of you.

spencer stood in the mirror, attempting to straighten his tie, with a navy blue suit on. his undershirt was a lighter shade of blue, his shoes black. when he turned to face you, you could see his face turning several shades of rouge.

"you look great, spence," you smiled as you began to walk towards him.

"i-you-i um... you look beautiful," he replied, biting his bottom lip gently as you placed your hand on his chest.

"thank you," you hummed as you wrapped your other arm around his body, really just to pull him closer to you. "i love you," you said so softly it was nearly inaudible.

you had said the usual 'love you's' nearly every night you had together as well as in public when on cases. but saying 'i love you' is extremely different than saying 'love you'.

saying 'i love you' is giving your own love to another person. it's letting them have full reign over your heart no matter how they plan on using it. saying 'love you' is only giving them a portion of your love. you still have that restraint and construction that doesn't allow you to be as vulnerable as when you say the 'i'.

"love you too, sweet girl. always," he replied, placing a kiss atop your head as he snaked his arms around your torso. "when did you get this dress? i don't remember seeing it before," he asked, resting his chin on your head.

"last weekend when you didn't want to go out, the girls and i went shopping. it was on sale; 25% off. i thought it was a pretty good deal," you smugly mumbled against his chest.

"that's my girl," he chuckled before you released him from your grip. "ready to go?"

"yup. i'm just gonna get my purse and we can head out," you motioned towards the living room.

you would normally be the one to drive since he has his anxieties about the road and all, but since he made the place a surprise it was on him to get the both of you there on time. he rested one hand on your thigh as his other was used to steer. you placed your hand on top of his, interlacing your fingers.

you didn't understand what was wrong. maybe he was faking the whole 'normal spencer' act? he's not acting like he doesn't love you right now. he seemed pretty attracted to you earlier when you came into the bedroom. you just didn't understand. you needed answers, but you could get those later.

when you finally arrived, you recognized the restaurant from one of rossi's spiels about which places serve 'the most authentic italian food he's had besides himself, of course'.

"rossi would be proud, spence," you chuckled as he opened the door for you.

"i actually had him pull a few strings with the owner of this place, apparently they're old family friends?" he said, placing a hand on the small of your back as the two of you walked to the host. "two for spencer reid please," the host looked at the clipboard on the podium before looking back up and giving the two of you a smirk.

"right this way, please," he smiled at spencer who looked at you with his lips pressed together in anticipation.

you followed the man up a set of stairs before he opened a large door for the two of you. you walked out, arm intertwined with spencer's, and found you were on the rooftop of the restaurant.

there was greenery all around you, fairy lights adorning every surface to give an amazing ambiance that set the most romantic mood imaginable. there was a small wooden table in the center of the floor, lit by one candle. there was a single red rose, obviously there to signify a meaning.

"i think those strings are pretty well tied, spence," you chuckled he began leading you to the table.

"i'm glad you like it," he removed his arm from yours so he could pull a chair out for you, pushing it back in once ready.

"it's so beautiful. the rose is a nice touch, too. was that your idea or rossi's?" you chuckled as you picked up the red flower to smell it.

"mine, actually," he smiled widely. "i've realized how long it's been since we've gone out together, and i wanted to do something special for you," he said as he sat beside you, taking your hand in his.

"i feel special right now," you smiled, placing a small kiss to his hand and never wanting to let go.

the rest of dinner went smoothly. you didn't ask him about his behavior, you felt like that was something that should be done in private.

now that you had gotten back home, you kicked off your heels, being sure to put them on your shoe rack to avoid later havoc, and sat down on the couch.

"wine?" spencer asked as he made his way to the kitchen.

"oh, i'm alright. i had some with dinner, thank you," you smiled as you waited for him to return.

once he got back, he placed two cups of iced water down on the coffee table and sat beside you. you curled into his side instinctively, feeling his muscles tense from the contact. you pulled back, searching his face for any discomfort.

"spencer...?" you whispered in his direction.

"yea, sweet girl?" he whispered back, you took a deep breath.

"are-are we okay?" you mumbled, not bothering to look at him.

"what do you mean? of course we're okay. we're okay, right?" he asked, backing up from you so he could get a better look.

"yes! but..." you trailed off, trying to find the courage. "it's just that lately you've been kind of off. you haven't been cuddling with me," you motioned to the couch. "you haven't danced with me like you used to. tonight's the first time we've been out in nearly a month. you won't even have sex with me. and..." you took a deep breath, "you haven't said 'i love you' in a really long time."

there was a pause. a long one. it was longer than a plank minute. you weren't looking at spencer at all, avoiding his eye contact in pure fear, just waiting for his answer.

"i'm sorry," he replied.

just an i'm sorry. now you knew, you were done. he didn't love you. it was all a show. he just wanted to make up for the past few weeks tonight, give you one last amazing memory before he broke the tie.

he would leave you. wondering what you did wrong. wondering why he had to go. wondering why you weren't good enough. you felt the tears in your eyes well up.

"don't cry, sweetie. i'm not-i'm not, we're okay,"he corrected, his hands cupping your face and wiping your teary cheeks clean. "i was just apologizing for me. i've been..." he sighed. "i've been gaining weight," now he was the one whispering.

"weight?" you sniffled, your hands ghosting over his on your face.

"yea," he replied, dropping his hands. "i've just been a bit insecure about it. that's why when we would cuddle i'd move away, i didn't want you to catch on to the weight," he shrugged.

"and the dancing...?"

"basically the same reason."

"and the going out?"

"i didn't want you to realize that some of my pants don't... they don't fit anymore," he winced as if the reveal hurt him.

"and the sex? you're still...?" you asked for reassurance.

"are you kidding? of course i'm attracted to you. do you see yourself?" he huffed in disbelief. "i just didn't want you to see me. my stomach, or arms," he sighed once more

"spencer, honey," you scooted closer to him on the couch, placing a hand on his shoulder and face. "i love you. you. you and your genius mind. the most romantic dates you plan for me. i love the way you lick your lip when you concentrate. the way you rub your hands together when you're presenting the profile. i love the rants you go on about anything and everything. i love you, spencer. and for the weight, that's perfectly alright. i love all of you," you placed a sweet kiss on his lips.

"i'm sorry i didn't talk to you about it sooner," he whispered against your mouth.

"it's alright spence. i understand," you sighed as he began kissing down your jawline. "i love you so, so much. you have no idea."

"i think i have a bit of an idea," he hummed against your neck.

"how about i show you?" you gave him a sly grin, your hands wandering to his belt buckle to undo it.

"oh-o-okay," he gave a small smile to you as you finally undid his belt, pulling his pants and underwear down together. you gently grasped his length, planting a kiss at the tip and trailing them down his shaft. "pl-please, y/n."

"shhh, i've got you, baby boy," you quieted him.

you licked a long stripe along the prominent vein, making sure to keep your eyes on him as you did so. his eyes fluttered shut, rolling to the back of his head as your tongue got higher on his length. once you got to the top, you gradually took him in. you hollowed your cheeks and pressed your tongue on the underside of his cock.

"fuck, y/n," he moaned, his hands reaching for your hair but hesitating whilst waiting permission.

"go ahead, you can touch me," you pressed his hand to the top of your head. "today's all about you, sweet boy."

when you went back to your ministrations, you made sure to use your hand on the rest of his dick that wouldn't fit in your mouth. you bobbed your head up and down, mostly guided by spencer's hold on you.

going by spencer's pace, it was rather quick and steady. you felt tears prick the corners of your eyes. you were tempted to blink them away but you couldn't not watch him in his euphoric state.

his head was tilted back, not enough to make it impossible to see his face. his eyes were lidded as his mouth was slightly agape, his breathing becoming more and more unsteady the longer you went on.

"oh my god, can i cum, mommy?" he asked in a high pitched voice, you hummed around his length as you continued to bob your head. "really? i can cum?" you quickly took your head off of his length for the shortest of seconds.

"go ahead, cum for me," and you dropped your head back on his length.

"oh thank you," he sighed in relief and gratitude. "thank you, ohh fuck yes, mommy," he groaned as he came down your throat with more 'thank you's and 'oh my god's.

"are you alright, sweet boy?" you asked as you rose to your knees.

"i'm more than alright, y/n," he said as he gripped your waist, pulling you onto his lap. "god, i love you so much," he began kissing your jawline once more.

"really? i had no idea," you joked as you tilted your head for better access.

"how about i show you?" he asked, his hands trailing down to your hips.

"you know how much i would love that, but i want to focus on you tonight. is that alright, bunny?" you asked, your hand gripping his chin softly to make him face you.

you had called him bunny once you found out how much he liked it when you rode him. he loved watching the way your breasts would bounce as you plopped down on him, not to mention how good and deep he could get inside you.

because of how much he liked it, doing that was always a treat for him. when he was especially good for you, did really good on a case, or when it was a special occasion you would allow it.

"yes, ma'am. it's alright," he nodded best he could with your hold on his chin. "b-but i want to taste you so bad," he pleaded, giving you his best puppy dog eyes.

"really? you wanna taste me so bad, honey?" you asked, your hand trailing down to his jawline as he nodded eagerly. "mmm, since you're just so cute i guess i'll let you."

"really?" his eyes widened.

"yea, really," you smiled at his surprise. "let's go to the bedroom now," you said as you rose off his lap, knowing spencer wasn't far behind you on your walk to the room.

you sat down at the bed, your feet dangling over the edge. spencer made his way to his knees, sitting down in front of you and looking up at you with pleading eyes.

"go ahead, bunny. you have permission to touch me all night," you granted him, your hand going to his hair as he pushed your dress up to slip off your underwear, beginning to pepper kisses along your thighs slowly.

his tongue made one stripe along your folds, your head shooting back with a loud moan. large hands grasped your hips to keep you near his face, knowing you would be squirming away eventually, as he continued to lap up your arousal.

"you're such a good boy, spencer," you praised him, noticing the affect the compliment had on him as he became much eager. "just like that, right there, right there, YES!" you hollered as you tugged his hair to bring him closer to you.

spencer had always been one for praise. part of you wondered why, but the other part didn't even care because you loved praising him. you call him your good boy because that's what he is. he's your good boy.

part of him being your good boy was him always being able to send you over the edge so quickly, and only by using his mouth.

"ohhh fuck! yes, spencer," you gripped his hair by the roots, a groan leaving his mouth and sending you into oblivion.

you practically had to tear him off of you, he's such an overachiever. he had a wide smile on his face as you brought him up to kiss you before he had even wiped your juices off his face.

"lay back, bunny," you motioned to the headboard. "i'm gonna ride you tonight."

"really?" he asked yet again.

"yes, really," you nearly laughed out. "do you wanna take your shirt off or leave it on?" you asked as you crawled on top of him.

"i um, i can take it off," he nodded.

"want me to do it for you, sweetie?" you asked, your hands finding their way to his chest as he nodded his head slowly. "alright."

so you did just that. you undid every button on his shirt, kissing every inch of skin as it was revealed to you until it was all the way off.

"mmm, you're such a pretty boy, spencer," you traced kisses back up to his neck, nipping his jawline gently as you placed him at your entrance. "my pretty boy."

"yo-your's. i'm a- i'm all your's," he huffed out as you slowly sank down on his length. "oh my god... feels so good," he groaned as he took your breasts in both of his hands.

"yea? you like the way my pussy feels around your pretty dick, bunny?" you enticed, enjoying the way his dick twitched inside of you. "ohh you like it when mommy talks to you too, huh? you like it when i talk about how good, how deep you get inside of me. how much i love those pretty little moans coming from you right now," you groaned out, feeling yourself get closer with every bounce and roll of your hips.

"mo-mommy, please," he shrieked out. "oh feels so good, wet, tight," he moaned, his hips bucking up to meet your pace.

you placed your hands on his chest as you began moving your hips at a much more rapid pace, not missing the way his thrusts followed suit. he always was an eager little bunny.

normally, you'd get on to him for being such a greedy brat but since he'd been such a good boy for you all night you'd oblige and let him have his fun.

"keep going, sweet boy," you encouraged him. "i'm so close, spence. come inside of me," you demanded.

much like you riding him, him being able to come inside of you was a treat. it was a reward for good behavior, because that's what he loves the most. because if you thought he liked you riding him, he was absolutely feral when it comes to being able to come undone inside of your body, feeling that close and intimate with you.

"i-i'm gonna come," he whimpered. "oh my god i'm gonna come."

"go ahead, bunny. i want your cum all inside me, baby. let it out," you egged him on.

what gave it away wasn't just the shoot of cum that now covered your walls, but the beautiful moans and pants that came from spencer while doing so. the way his head tilted back more, his mouth became slightly more agape as his upper chest a brighter shade of red. absolutely beautiful.

the intenseness from his high spurred that of your own in return. your legs began to shake as he kept thrusting inside of you, not only to help you through your orgasm but to also fuck his back inside of you.

"good boy, spencer. such a good boy," you breathed out once you had fully come down from your high.

you rested your head on his chest for a moment, trying to catch your breath before finally getting off him. you grabbed his hands and led him to the bathroom to start a bath for the two of you.

you let him lay back against your chest as you played with his hair. he nearly fell asleep because of how soothing the bath salts were, those were his favorites during your aftercare routine.

after you both dried your bodies off, you made sure to dry his hair for him, something he's become rather accustomed to. he just loved you playing with his hair, in all reality.

laying back in bed, his head back on your chest, you still played with his hair.

"spencer?" you asked, continuing on when you heard the quiet hum from him. "you know how much i love you?" he nodded against your body. "good. because i want you to know that no matter what you look like, super thin or a bit filled out, i will always love you. and you can always come to me about that too. if you're feeling insecure or upset?"

"i know. i was just... embarrassed about it," he mumbled against your skin.

"i know, bunny. but i'll show you that there's nothing to be embarrassed about."

[99ves]

What’s gotten into you, Rei? Embarrassed that I saw it? You wanted me to see your silly little post, didn’t you?

Was it that big of a deal? You’d pull Gojou aside for that? Pull him aside for what exactly? Pull him aside because you got caught reminiscing about what we used to be?

Just know that you won’t be pulling anyone aside for anything. This is between you and I now— this has always concerned no one else but us and the kids. Just forget about Gojou, alright? He doesn’t even know half of the shit we’ve been through. Be polite and focus on me. I’m your guest in your space; entertain me for a bit won’t you?

Who would’ve known that my ex-wife would bear so many feelings for (as your mother would say) a “piece of shit” like me, huh? Here I am at your front door and now it seems like you’ve done a complete 180. So cold-hearted to the father of your children, Rei… I’d be lying if I said this new demeanor wasn’t turning me on.

I remember it all now— why I fell in love with you. Lying is pointless, and you taught me that when we divorced. You taught me to keep it real, so I’ll be honest with you as well.

I know things will work out between us. You just simply think that we can’t go back to how things used to be. God, why be so negative, baby? And here I was thinking that you always saw nothing but the good in me.

Look how long it’s been since we last saw each other— since we last spent any time together, just you and I. Could you at least let me in so that I can touch you once again? Remember those days? When you’d hug me every time I came home from work? When I’d…

Getou slowly brings the back of his hand to your face, brushing his fingers along your warm cheek.

Touch you just like this… Yeah, it made you smile ear-to-ear didn’t it?

You always loved what we had going on— even while shit was slowly crumbling to dust. But we can still be two halves to a whole, we can be whatever you want us to be. These past 2-3 years have changed me and I can prove that. You know without a doubt that I’d show you how much I’ve changed if you gave me the chance to.

Just be please mine again, that’s all I want right now. Say you’ll be mine and I promise to give you what you really deserve this time around and forever.

— Ex-husband! Getou.

funny you mention my mother, she always did warn me about men like— well, you. i was a fool really, so naïve; can you really blame me for change in demeanor, suguru? pulling the father card? lets keep the kids out of this, they're probably going through enough as is, don't you think? and yes, i have always seen nothing but the good in you— always will. nothing could ever change that. not now, not ever. my eyes quickly fall to your lips and for a fleeting moment i consider kissing you but opt to meeting your eyes once more instead, resolve dropping when the feeling of your fingers against my cheek send a shiver down my spine. if we do this— if this flame between us rekindles...we'll regret it soon after, you know— i say, subtly leaning into your touch. i’ll regret it. what‘ll we do then? when everything comes crashing down harder than it did before. you promise me forever, but what if all we have is tonight?

[retvenkos]

not asking you who you'd ship me with in the grishaverse because at this point everyone on tumblr knows the answer to that probably (though any chance of getting more of your wonderfully divine headcanons about matthias & I is a chance I gleefully take), but since you are shipping everyone I have to tell you that I've been thinking about Mal & you together for a little while. I just see it so clearly??

I think you'd have a relationship quite like Alina and Mal's, except healthier and less dramatic lol. but Mal is the epitome of friends to lovers and to me you embody exactly that. you're not the unbridled fury that enemies to lovers can be nor the bittersweet inevitability of soulmates, but really this idea of familiarity and comfort that you only unlock after spending a lot of time with a person, probably in childhood. Mal would represent exactly that to you: home, family, and love, and you're not really sure how or when you realize that it's not the same love you used to feel at Keramzin, that your feelings have shifted in the most terrifying yet beautiful way, but they have.

so in this scenario if you are Grisha, you get tested and your powers found out and you get sent to the Little Palace and your goodbyes with Mal are probably the most tearful moment Ravka has ever seen. You're holding on to Mal for dear life because he's really your family and you don't want to leave him behind, they're taking you to an unknown place without him, and you're so scared - but Mal tries to hold it all together because he has to be strong for you, and promises he will write to you every day and you will never truly be separated because he'll find you when he's older and strong.

(as soon as the carriage leaves he locks himself in the dormitory and cries all evening on his bed because your absence is so loud in these silent halls)

Inevitably years pass as you continue your training and Mal's letters become more scarce - sometimes you're the one who forgets to reply for a whole month, sometimes it's him - until you're not in touch anymore but you don't forget him, you never do, and you dream of him so often and all the words you wish you could tell him but never got the courage to

Until one day, almost a decade later, he is received at the Grand Palace for a particularly triumphant feat of his (Mal, always the hero) and the King wants to meet the First army soldier everyone is talking about, and you happen to run into him as he's trying to find his way to the audience room (because how stupidly huge are these Os Alta palaces, really?) And you literally can't believe your eyes.

so you'd be getting the childhood friends to lovers reunited after losing contact for many years which is TOP TIER romance

and Mal has changed obviously but not so much, and so have you; and he's taken aback by your beauty in your purple Kefta, and suddenly all the petty and insulting stereotypes about the Second Army he used to joke about with his regiment friends leave his mind because Saints - who needs a Sun Summoner when you're glowing like all the stars in the sky?

you'd quickly fall back into your common habits because they never left you, they're second nature at this point - Mal has basically forged your personality from the youngest age and you have his, and you fit together so perfectly

he'd be assigned to a more permanent post in Os Alta thanks to his prowesses in battle, maybe as the King's personal guard, meaning you'd get to spend so much time together

People would raise eyebrows at the sight of a couple between the two rival armies, but you don't care one bit - your love for Mal runs in your blood much deeper than arbitrary oppositions based on foolish pride.

If you're not Grisha, I don't think you'd join the First Army; war is probably not for you. I think your paths would separate too when he joins the Army and you leave the orphanage with what little money you saved over the years (sneaking out of Keramzin and reciting or singing your poems on the streets for a little bit of coin, or selling the meat and fur Mal would hunt for you) to move to a bigger city and try to do something with your life. You could be an artisan, or another kind of shopkeep! I can see you being manually gifted and creative, so you'd probably have an artsy business in the capital, like pottery or tapestry or painting on porcelain or something of the sort

and once again Mal is called to Os Alta probably for the same reasons - he just can't help distinguishing himself in combat, can he? - and he steps into your shop by total chance, and he's like. Olive???? Since when do you do sculptures???? And you're like. Malyen Oretsev???? Since when are you taller than me????

(Though the sculpture part doesn't surprise him that much, because you were always so creative and gifted in the arts, and he's always admired you so much for it.)

(But the TALL part??? ok, you are short, but you left him when he was like, thirteen and he was Not That Tall. how can your forever friend have grown that tall so fast???)

And so you ALSO get the long-lost childhood friends rekindle and fall back in love trope because my heart goes mushy for it ❤

your dynamic would be on point, because Mal knows you better than anyone and so he can read you like an open book. Either when he needs to find the teasing comment that will get you all riled up, or when he senses your discomfort or sadness and has to find the words to cheer you up.

You'd just make so many sweet memories with Mal, and he'd be down for every single thing you want to do as long as he gets to spend time with you. Want to be rambunctious on the streets of Os Alta and pull pranks on passerbys like you are 8 again? Yep, can totally do that. Feel like breathing in the fresh air of the wilderness and getting out of town to see a beautiful sunset, like you would in Keramzin? Of course! Just want to chill together doing your own thing and relishing in each other's presence? Absolutely.

he loves when you read to him, whether that be a book you own or a story straight from your imagination that you just wrote, and he's absolutely mesmerized by your voice and how much emotion you put in it. (though he can't help himself from making little jokes every now and then or trying to guess what will happen next in the story because he's what my mom calls a Culo Inquieto™)

you'd generally be such a cute couple who never lost that mischievous but oh so comforting and familiar spark from when you were kids, and is willing to stay with the other through thick and thin. you've found your other half in each other and I'm so soft for that. 💜💜

sorry I rambled but I just think that idea is so cute and you deserve a ship! (also, don't even get me started on the Chaos BFF Duo you would make with Jesper...) my head is killing me so I won't write any more but just know I hold this ship in extremely high regard. <3

clara, i will have you know i waited until i got ice cream in order to read this, because i knew it would be an experience™ and now, i,,, 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 i'm so goddamn soft, how dare you make me yearn????

you mean to tell me you came up with all of this... for me? you think of ships for me??? how—how dare? how dare you be such a good friend, to the point where i am baffled by your kindness??? how dare you be this thoughtful and poetic,,,,,,, and just, big brained, ma'am.

because all of this is so perfect!!!! ohmygod i'm soft. i'm in love. everytime you write a ship or fanfic, i sincerely wish i was a romantic like you so i could have a proclivity toward fathoming such soft romantic scenes,,,,, you, clara, know how to do a ship™.

(also, i have to say i love the childhood friends torn apart, only to come back together,,,, it has laughter lines by bastille energy,,,, listen to this song and tell me it doesn’t have the same vibes that that very specific and heartwarming trope,,,)

but, since you gave me such a beautiful gift, and since i would do anything for you, here are some more headcanons for you and matthias:

first of all, i think that you and matthias would spend a lot of time finding the beauty in small things. i think that it would be good for him, since he’s reevaluating who he is and his place in this grand world, and i think since you’re a romantic, small things would be important to you both.

— for example, you guys definitely star gaze together. it’s hard, since you are in ketterdam and the smoke is impossible to see through, but maybe you guys leave ketterdam for a while, and you spend a lot of time looking up at the stars. matthias loves to learn about everything you know, and repositioning himself underneath the sky is a good start to figuring out who he is. 

— you also like to sit by the water and talk. there’s something about the water that pulls memories from you both. matthias talks about what it was like, far away, in his little village before the drüskelle. (i get the feeling his dad was a fisherman or something,,,, the vibes are there), and you get to talk about people you once knew, dreams you once had. point is, you do a lot of talking - swapping stories and hopes.

— oh! another idea i can’t get out if my head is that matthias asks you so many questions. i feel like it’s a sign of real love and trust, when matthias starts asking you questions, because you have to be like,,, level 50 in order for matthias to admit weaknesses, and one of his biggest is that there’s so much he just doesn’t know. i think you also get really good at just,,,, telling him stuff so that he doesn’t have to ask, and he really just appreciates it.

i also just love the idea of matthias giving you to strongest hugs, or tbh, just holding you, and it’s all because he’s the big, strong one™! you know he’s got a protector complex, so that kind of feeds into his hugs,,, just that intense need to protect you, but also, he’s deathly terrified of losing another person he cares about, so he clings. (but only when you’re alone. the drüskelle in him is too Proud, but if you hang onto him in public,,,, he’s not complaining, just getting used to it)

okay, but i got a little bit ahead of myself, because i didn’t even talk about when you guys first meet, and the whole dynamic that is that™

— so, clearly, you are bffs with nina, whether your a grisha or not, and since i want fluff oNLY we’re just going to pretend like helnik didn’t happen,,,,,, they’re just friends. anyway, she’s the first one to pick up on your feelings for matthias because a) heartrender, and b) you two are the best of friends, and she just knows.

— and so you know a lot of teasing ensues, and almost everyone gets in on it and constantly makes jokes about you and matthias,,,, sometimes while he’s right. there. you’re Mortified But Coping™ and you can’t imagine what is going on through matthias’ head, because there’s no way he can feel the same, right?

— wRONG, we’re all idiots when we’re in love, and no one is more of an idiot than matthias. he is definitely ~soft~ for you but refuses to let it show because (1) the dregs are crass and he doesn’t want to give them fodder, and (2) you seem very uncomfortable about this whole thing, and he doesn’t want to make it worse

after some time, the teasing dies down, because both of you are too boring to tease. it would be funny if one of you freaked out, but you’re just,,,, suffering in silence. boring. and besides, inej and kaz are way more funny to tease. have you seen the murder in both of their eyes whenever you mention anything??? scary, but golden.

for the most part, the jokes die off, and i think after the jokes stop, you and matthias become much more comfortable with one another, and it leads to so! many! good! moments! 

— did i ever tell you matthias is in love with your stupid humor? your enchanting laughter? you’re so infectiously light and it makes him feel like he’s walking on clouds or something,,,,, he’s enchanted by you, but doesn’t have the words to explain it. 

— you know he remembers all of the little things his dad used to say about his mom,,,, and he feels all of that awed respect and soft warmth for you, but what to do with it???? he can’t really remember what his parents would do - it’s been so long and cold without them, but he tries to remember, and it’s the little things he does. he’ll tell you something really sweet in fjerdan and you’re just like ??? but it doesn’t translate super well, so you’re just left with the way he said it, and it means the world (plus, if you really get the courage, you can ask nina to explain it,,,, fair warning though, she scoffs at it every time. because it’s fjerda, alright?)

— you definitely end up reading him some poetry. it’s all under the guise of him ‘learning about the beauty in other cultures’ but really, it’s just an excuse to read him romantic shu poetry (they really know how to do it, let me tell you). and you also end up telling him stories about your childhood and your life, and he finds your rambling so adorable. especially since he has seen your work on paper! he finds it so sweet that your mind is so full of life that it wants to go everywhere at once, and experience every possible detail.

— you definitely end up showing matthias his way around ketterdam, and he keeps all of your hastily drawn maps, and whenever he goes past a street corner, he remembers the way your eyes sparkled in the light of the streetlamps.

i definitely have the feeling that you confess your feelings first. matthias has been trying to get the courage to do it, but he just can’t, and one day you tell him late at night - when, for just a moment, the world is still and quiet, and you can’t hold in all that warmth in your chest. you’re a little shy about it, but so is he, and when he hears you confess, all he can do is smile, because you have all of the confidence and strength he wishes he had. and all that courage laced in his chest, he’s learned it from you.

that’s ll i got for now, but i believe in clara x matthais supremacy.

[warlock-enthusiast]

how to say how I feel

So, as always some feelings about our last Star Wars: Force and Destiny session! The gang is leaving the Ness family to explore the future of the Jedi Order. Tried to use as much ingame dialogue as I could remember (argh, my sloppy notes)

Fandom: Star Wars - Force & Destiny

Characters: Secesa x Xaruk, Seya Ness, the Padawan gang

Rating: M (sexual themes)

(This fic is sponsored by cheesy 2009 Snow Patrol music)

----------------

All that I am

All that I ever was is here in your perfect eyes

they're all I can see

Secesa leaned against the countertop and watched Seya leave.

“Take care of my brother.”

She’d try, but what to expect of Tython? A planet so mythical that Kadran needed to cook it some dinner, before it’d even show itself. So, filled with the Force that their bodies probably wouldn’t handle it well. Not to mention the fragile peace between Republic and Empire, which’d been such a joke for every Padawan and Jedi that lost their life and everyone that had witnessed their home being destroyed.

Nightmares came and went and meditation didn’t always help and Secesa knew that leaving here would hurt them more.

Stupid Ness family and their open hearts and minds, so filled with love and care for each other. Almost painful to look at them. And stupid Atheo with his emotions so open and not hidden very well. Even his sister saw conflicted, blossoming feelings in his expressions when he talked to his Master.

Who knew what happened right now with the two of them sitting beneath a myriad of stars?

At last, Secesa wouldn’t be the only Padawan in this group, who felt too much attachment to their Master. Though, her attraction came from a darker place than Atheo’s sweetness and naivety.

Secesa put the last dishes away and washed her hands. Time to put such thoughts behind her and enjoy her last hours of freedom. Almost everyone had already retired to their rooms, Shelly hopefully sleeping, Tundold eagerly reading the diary from Raphael’s dead Zabrak lover, while Nathair tried to get him and Kadran closer together.

She shook her head and took a deep breath.

Zabraks.

The horns. It had to be the horns.

Her skin prickled, as Xaruk approached. He didn’t try to be overly stealthy and smelled like fresh soap, as if he’d just finished a quick visit in the fresher.

“You’re ready?”

She offered him a half-smile and nodded. “I’m ready. Lead the way.”

Secesa linked their arms. Night had fallen and a bright moon guided their path down to the lake. It appeared even more beautiful than during the day and very quiet and undisturbed. She’d seldom seen so many stars and patterns woven into the darkness.

Coruscant’s sky had always been filled with artificial lights and more orange and yellow than here.

She still missed her home.

“We’re here!”

Xaruk stopped to put a blanket on the ground, which made Secesa laugh. He’d put some thought into this and she followed him and sat down.

He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “You’re leaving tomorrow?”

“Yes, we’re leaving.” Her words hang between them.

Xaruk’s gaze met hers. “Tell Shelly, I want to talk to her in the morning.”

“I will.” Secesa didn’t know why or what about, but probably about her being a fantastic fighter and worthy of Mandalore.

“I thought that I’d spent the rest of my life here, helping the Ness family, protect them and enjoy their hospitality, but a shuttle landed...” Xaruk’s eyes seemed unusually bright and expressive.

“And with it came a storm.”

Secesa’s throat felt dry and her tongue too heavy for words. How to answer that? How to express her thoughts. He’d told her before that their arrival rekindled some lost flame, that he wanted to do something more with his life than spend it with being a farmhand.

Thankfully, Xaruk continued to talk.

“I’ll be leaving too. Tomorrow with Seya and her pet Empire officers. “

She’d thought that maybe he’d wait a few days and leave, after Jidi and Vizit had some time to deal with seeing both of their twins leaving them. With a bit of luck, she’d probably manage to hide somewhere during breakfast. “Oh, lots of goodbyes tomorrow. And tears.”

“Yes.”

Silence formed comfortably between the two of them. Secesa pushed away the thoughts of the coming dawn and saying goodbye again. Sure, they'd stay in contact, but it wouldn't be the same. Secesa liked being near him, the heat of his body, his presence and how it made her feel.

It just fit.

Xaruk caressed her cheek. “Remember my amulet. It’ll help you find me. Show it to some bounty hunters and they’ll know my name and how to find me.”

“Of course, they’ll do.”

She laughed, imaging herself in some seedy cantina, asking for Xaruk and showing the symbol of his people. How very not Jedi.

Turning around, she managed to take a small package out of her robes.

“Jedis are not allowed to own anything.”

Xaruk smiled. “Well, the amulet is actually mine, so you wouldn’t break any rules.”

“No, no… I mean, I wanted to give you something too. Something to remember me.”

Secesa had cut off a strand of her hair. Thick, black and held together by a pretty ribbon (a small donation from Atheo’s grandmother), wrapped in fabric.

“Here.”

“I…”

“Oh.”

Xaruk seemed at a loss for words. He opened his mouth just to close it again. His hard face lit up with emotions, Secesa couldn’t discern. And she was afraid to what she might find there.

She rubbed her neck. “Well.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

He kissed her. A better answer than any words and it spared them any further awkwardness. In the end, they hadn’t known each other for long, but something had sparked and Secesa felt the connection haunting her. Mediation didn’t help. She’d been off for a while now, even before the temple fell, and with Xaruk so present in her mind, no equilibrium could be found.

The Force knew everything. Hopefully it'd lead her into the right direction.

His body weight forced her to lie down, her back connected with the hard ground. Even now, the air around them seemed warm and comfortable, but she shivered as she undressed and pushing the heavy robes to the side.

Secesa traced the scars and markings on his chest, kissed his neck and embraced his closeness. His scent filled her mind, clean and sharp. She’d seldom felt that good, that right.

Whole.

And Xaruk’s eyes never left hers, always so bright and filled with warmth. No comparison to his stoic appearance when they’d first seen each other.

She put her hands against his chest and earned a questioning gaze. Secesa answered with a kiss and made him turn around, because it was his time to feel all these little, hard stones in his back. Pressing her thighs against his hips, she just enjoyed the view for a few seconds.

“Something wrong?”

“No. You’re too handsome.”

“Hm?”

“These horns.” Carefully she touched every little tip and she saw him rolling his eyes at her.

He sat up then, forcing their chests to connect. Xaruk bit her just beneath her collarbone. His teeth broke skin. A sharp pain made her gasp. It’d scar, if not treated and she’d make sure that Tundold would never see it.

“Enough of this.” She wrapped her legs around Xaruk’s hips and brought their bodies together. Thankfully the night swallowed their moans.

Hours passed and the moon rose and sank and birds chirped to announce the coming dawn.

Far too soon for her taste.

Secesa’s body ached in a most welcome way, as she rolled around to face him. He did look a bit exhausted with heavy breathing and eyes closed.

She reached for his hand. “Wish we had more time.”

Xaruk opened his eyes to watch the stars. “Me too.”

“We still have a few hours left.”

He smiled. “Let’s make them count.”