#but like damn‚ that bit about most of the PCs making fun of the friend crush invite really like. disappointed me

[smeddiemunson]

Gareth notices first and as soon as Gareth has a thought he has to share it.

They’re at Hellfire (now hosted in Mike Wheeler’s armpit of a basement) having just finished a long combat when Eddie declares it time for a break and without any further preamble dashes up the stairs, taking them two at a time, and calling dibs on the main bathroom. 

The others are taking a bit longer to get to their break. They all stand like they’re in some kind of synchronised swimming competition and all reach up in unison to crack the various bones that need to, heaving out groans and mumbles about shitty chairs. 

“So,” Gareth says as he rubs his fingers in his eyes. “Eddie has a crush.” 

Jeff collapses back in his chair to burry his face in folded arms with a groan. “I can’t do this again, Gare-Bear.”

Gareth wrinkles his nose at the nickname, and mentally curses his mom for using it around his friends. They’ve never been able to let it go. 

“Wait, what?” Dustin asks. His head is bouncing between Gareth, Jeff, and Grant, eyes tracking over their faces to see if they’re just trying to fuck with him. As if Eddie’s love life wasn’t already tragic enough without the added fun of trying to bother some kids with it.

Grant nodded sagely. “Unfortunately, it only gets worse from here.” 

Mike, who had been half way towards the stairs, now joins in. “What gets worse? He’s being normal Eddie, or like, as normal as Eddie can get.” 

Gareth shares a long look with his bandmates, all seemingly coming to the same conclusion. These kids were here to stay, that much had become clear after the Spring Break/Eddie in a coma Saga, so they could be let in on a few Eddie secrets, not the big one, never the big one until Eddie told them. These were more secrets about Eddie that Eddie was completely unknowledgeable about. 

“You remember the bartender at The Three Brothers we spoke to to find out about the curse?” Gareth says, somehow becoming the voice for the older members of Hellfire. “Did you notice the way Eddie described him?”

“He talked a lot about his hair?” Will offered quietly. He was new to Hellfire so Gareth didn’t really know him, but just from the way Will played his cleric, he could tell that he was a damn sight more observant than his friends. 

“Exactly!” Gareth pointed. “That is Clue 1 in the ‘Eddie Munson Has a Crush’ textbook. He gets so hung up on that one thing that he likes the most about who he’s crushing on, get ready to hear a lot about the NPC’s hair. Clue 2 is that when he comes thundering down those stairs in a minute and realises we haven’t actually done anything with our break, he won’t be shitty about us taking extra time. He just gets nice outta nowehere.”

“Eddie always hates when he has to wait for us though!” 

Jeff finally pulled his head up from his arms. “Just watch, and it’s the one good thing that’s going to come from this crush, so make the most of it.” 

The four boys all gave each other looks that seemed to be conveying a whole conversation. They seemed to come to the same conclusion just as Eddie, as Jeff predicted, thundered down the stairs, skipping the last one so he could jump to the floor and theatrically clap his hands. 

“Who’s ready to get fucked up by what I have planned next?” He asked, not even noticing the way the rest of the boys hadn’t moved from their places stretching next to the table. 

“Sorry man. I still gotta go to the bathroom,” Lucas quickly said before Dustin could start grilling Eddie about his crush. 

Eddie shrugged with a smile. “No worries, Sinclair. You gotta go when you gotta go, right?” 

This was particularly offensive to Mike, who when he first joined Hellfire had been forced to squirm in his seat for over an hour while Eddie threatened to kill his PC off if Mike left the table to use the bathroom. He turned his gobsmacked expression to Gareth who could only raise his eyebrows in a kind of ‘told you so’ gesture. 

Lucas, to his credit, didn’t let on that he was also gobsmacked and rushed up the stairs. Will and Mike followed him quickly, stumbling out an excuse about getting more drinks. Eddie being amenable was seemingly still too new to let them make the most of it, the Corroded Coffin boys had at least been through this three notable times before.

“Get me a coke while you’re up there, please?” Eddie called out after them. He kicked up his feet to rest on the edge of the table, crossed at the ankles and rocked back onto the back two legs of his chair. He turned to the Corroded Coffin boys. “I’ve been thinking about arranging this song, not our usual style but I think it could sound totally metal if I did it right.” 

“What song?” Jeff asked carefully. 

Grant caught Dustin’s eye and mouthed ‘Clue 3′. Dustin nodded as if he were mentally taking notes, which if Gareth knew anything about the kid, he probably was. He took to the puzzles Eddie laid out for them with more gusto than anyone else. 

Eddie closed his eyes and brought his hands up in front of him as if he were tenderly cradling his warlock. His fingers worked over imaginary frets. “Dancing in the Dark. Springsteen.” 

“That’s Steve’s favourite song,” Dustin blurted out, clamping his hand over his mouth when Eddie’s fingers paused in the air. 

A slow smile spread over his face. “Is it?”

Gareth turned to his best friends to see the expression he wore mirrored two times over. 

Holy shit. 

Eddie was crushing on Steve Harrington. 

(part 2)

[gilsart]

Are there any books you can recommend about Friedrich? German or English would be nice.

By the way, your art is so damn cute and adorable!! I am always happy to see you on my dashboard, even if you're "just" answering questions as you seem really nice.

hi!! first of all thank you ,,, means a lot to me, i always re-read my answers to make sure i don't sound rude or anything 😭 anxiety girlies where you at

about the books, there are lots!! i recommend you also ask @kattestrophe - she knows more than i do, especially about the german books; i am neither german nor english so some of those i own aren't available in languages other than my own.

the ones from my collection that are available in english/german are:

frederick the great by william f. reddaway - this is a biography, available in english, i haven't read it all because i only needed the crown prince bit, and that one had historical inaccuracies, so be mindful. but it has images!!

king in prussia by rafael sabatini - this is fiction and also available in english! it's a book from 1944 i believe, divided in two parts, specifically before katte's death and after katte's death up until ... i think the end of the seven years war? i don't know, i haven't read it all and i will stop at katte's death. fritz is very gay in this one as far as i've read, but in a queer disney villain way, which can be fun if you decide to ignore the homophobia. also one of the protagonists is katte's entirely fictional jacobite cousin, the most annoying man on earth.

zeithain by michael roes - this also is fiction, and only available in german. i have only read five pages of it (my german is very poor) and it follows katte, not friedrich. katte is also very sad. but as far as i was told, both of them are gay, so there's that. so far hans is like "it's raining and i'm alone and last week i went to a funeral. i have prayed to the god i lost during my childhood", certainly something very different from how he behaves in king in prussia ...

katte: die geschichte einer freundschaft by gertrud von brockdorff - this is also german only, i'm not sure about the actual book being available (i was sent a pdf) although it could be available in germany?? it is pretty old tho (1934) so i wouldn't know much about that. this one is also more about katte and friedrich, again fiction, it's eight chapters, still haven't read it because this bad boy is written in fraktur and i have trouble reading that but i have had conversations about it, and boy is it queer. there is a single chapter in which katte has a small identity crisis and has a romance with wilhelmine, but after that he's back to longing for frédéric and his "wide, bright and impenetrable" eyes that bewitch everyone. fellas is it gay to think your male friend's eyes are what you need a woman to have so you can actually love her?

the sorrows of frederick by romulus linney - available in english, this is a play from 1966, still haven't read it (the package is somewhere in europe right now), i think it follows all of fritz's life? it has fredersdorf, at least. but fredersdorf here knows katte, so eh. some anachronistic thingies here and there, what's new.

der alte fritz in 50 bildern - i can't figure out the name of the authors (damn it, fraktur) but worry not: this only has somewhat cool illustrations about fritz's life and a little bit of german text. at least some of them are. others are peculiar: voltaire is shorter than fritz in these. he wishes. i'm adding a photo though, so you can see!

i also own a pretty interesting book, not about fritz but about the seven years war in general, titled "prussian army soldiers and the seven years' war: the psychology of honour" by katrin and sascha moebius (there is an umlaut on the o there; i'm writing this on my pc and don't know where to find it).

i also have "later selected poems" by sheenagh pugh, which contains "five voices", a cycle of five poems showing five different perspectives on katte, if you're interested in that. there isn't a fritz perspective, though.

he also has a short chapter in "bad gays" by huw lemmey and ben miller, but i found it to be somewhat offensive at some point, although that could be a translation issue: there is a pretty offensive slur and some things i found to be inaccurate. overall i wouldn't buy it. i only bought it because the italian edition has very cool illustrations, at a time where i did not know about this translation thing.

the rest of my books are all available in italian only (or about voltaire).

hope this was helpful!

[skeletor9000-blog]

Elden Ring vs Modern Game Design (The utilisation of FOMO)

FOMO. "Fear of Missing Out." The concept is used in many, if not 90% of facets of capitalism to get you to buy in, to try this new toaster, watch this new show, play this new game so you don't miss out on THE DISCUSSION. The Discussion is a concept I'll be using in this shitpost repeatedly to refer to the cultural zeitgeist, mainly because zeitgeist is a pretentious word that people only say to make their peers believe they're cultured when in reality we can tell you took that take off Twitter Joe.

The Discussion, to explain a little more, is the cyberspace, the discord, twitter, reddit, your friends, your coworkers all talking about the same thing. "oh did you see Man U last night?" "Benedict Townsend dropped a new video did you watch it?" "Damn did you get the last boss?" and this has been weaponised for most of the modern age to get you to buy into products for fear of missing out on The Discussion.

Now video games are no stranger to this desire to be part of The Discussion but lately games have wanted their players and talkers to talk about everything. EVERYTHING. Right now. Everything needs to be discussed, all that hard work and artistic vision NEEDS to be seen, to be fawned over, to be critcised. And you can't miss out otherwise everyone will race ahead of you, so get on your PC! Get that new Genshin character, buy the battlepass and make sure you get that fried chicken gun or Tina from Accounting will laugh at you!

you thought I was joking

FOMO is weaponised not only in multiplayer games but in Single Player games too. Take for example God of War Ragnarok. Great game. Super fun. Does it have incredible gameplay, graphics, story, love within every aspect to the point you can tell this is nigh perfect? Yes. But it also utilises FOMO to great extent in the form of the map.

nothing left to chance

So the devs have made it so you do not miss a single thing. Every post is marked, every chest every draugr hole, every "secret" boss is shown clearly for our lovely ideal ADHD player who was concieved of in a boardroom that every game making company has to adhere to.

Every game company bar one.

the software of from

Hey, Hey! Stop writing that note! I am aware of Indie Developers doing shit like what I'm about to describe for years but this is about the mainstream damnit so stay in your lane (the next post will be about them)

So From Software. The guys that changed the ga- scene with their title Demons Souls and iterated it again and again until we got the behemoth that is Elden Ring. Let me take you back a decadeeand a bit, to the wonderful, military shooter filled, Obama-lusted times of 2009.

this wont have any repurcussions

2009 was a big year for video games, notable releases such as Call of Duty 6 Modern Warfare 2, Skate 2 and the critically acclaimed Sandy Beach for the Nintendo Wii

i cried at the end because someone threw sand in my eyes

The gaming scene was getting bland. This was the zero dawn point of the Horizon that was oncoming, that is to say Call of Duty became nuclear popular and every game was about to copy it and be even worse. The scene had many good games but all of them had little booklets, tutorials, checkpoints, save points, proper wuss shit for the average gamer. You couldn't walk 10 metres without a "checkpoint reached" littering your very cluttered UI.

this is america's joe biden

In comes Demon Souls, a game that flew in the face of this hand holding, quite far from it actually. there were barely any tutorials, you got killed in one shot by most enemies. Your only reliable defence was a roll and everything was hard. Most importantly, you didn't know wtf was going on. There's a vague character here, a secret you missed there, some weird world tendency bullshit going on in the background, people had no clue. It was a ball of black mystery dropped in a sea of devs enticing you with shiny gimmicks.

And that's why people still talk about it today.

this is the beginning.

Demons Souls was the blueprint. It had winding levels that double backed on themselves in ways you wouldn't imagine, side characters who had quests which made 0 sense on how to progress, difficulty upon difficulty for new gamers, it was so different. The beauty of it flying in the face of conventional gaming meant people HAD to talk about it. It didn't just grab The Discussion, it had it a nigh permanent place the other forms of media would die for.

You had to talk to other people to progress. Whether it be to find clues to secret weapons, to notice shortcuts others had found, to even finding boss weaknesses to give tips and tricks on how to progress.

By making all this knowledge unavailable from the get go, Demons Souls had forced players to become each others guides, and as a result people would keep playing it because you'd find something new someone else said that you'd wanna check out. It might not even be true, some guy could start a rumour about the penetrators armour being available and players would go and see if he was correct and find out the liar was ahead, but the wonder of naiivete had returned. From Software had taken a weary artform, and showed everyone there was another way.

And then they got good at it.

sony greenlit horizon 2 but never want anyone to mention this game for some reason

Admittedly I never played Dark Souls 1 or 2 (I'm sorry) but the one game where I felt From Software peaked in terms of utilising FOMO was Bloodborne.

Bloodborne is another From Software game that's set in 1990s England, where London has run out of beans so the denizens put blood from an alien on their toast instead and go crazy at the lack of flatulence it gave them. The gameplay was tight and faster paced than Dark Souls, and the aesthetic had gone from Dark Fantasy to Victorian Gothic architecture (if ur a smartass pls correct me on this).

It is fantastic. The story and lore created by this game is given to you in drips and drabs from small item descriptions and minimal lines from NPCs who either try to kill you or die from you trying to help them. This happens a lot.

This game was released in 2015, and never got a sequel, nor a remaster, just 1 dlc and that's it. It didn't follow convention, sticking to the tried and true method of lore and story you have to dig out, bosses who you'd need to look online to help with, sidequests that make 0 sense, Areas that require moon logic to enter, but goddamn it did it well. And, as a result, people STILL have discussions about Bloodborne to this day.

The Pale Blood Hunt is essential reading for any Bloodboner out there looking for lore btw, but I'm losing focus.

So this strategy of lack of direct information, lack of direction, no easy hints to what you have to do has led to a higher barrier of entry but also it leads people to WANT to explore more of your game. There is no checklist on a map, it's more "I found a spooky ass castle did you find the vampire in it?" and then you ask wtf what castle. Your next hours are spent trawling through nightmares again to find an invitation to a spooky carriage that whisks you away to 10 more hours of wonder.

this is an optional area

again, you're found wanting more, and the game giving it to you. Your friends, people online, youtubers are all diving into the content to find the nooks and crannies instead of having it all laid out to you as quest markers or on your map. The Discussion is still holding a round table for avid fans to talk about Bloodborne. This felt like peak From Software game making at the time. An interesting world, so much content, incredible gameplay, what more could they do?

Little did The Discussers know, From Software hadn't even begun to peak.

I'll shatter anything and anyone for a chance with you babydoll

ALL OF THIS you can visit

Elden Fucking Ring. The best open world ever created, the magnum opus of design, absolutely shattering the philosophies about overworld design and creating such an inviting vista that you beg to explore, rather than begging you to check out the neat trick it conveniently has marked for you.

The biggest beauty of Elden Ring to me compared to God of War is that God of War is afraid. God of War is scared you'll miss out on what they've worked hard on so they have voicelines reminding you of the berserker's existence, of any objective or sidequest you haven't accomplished, it has an exhaustive checklist so you can guiltlessly leave from any area without having your anxiety spike thinking you might miss something. Elden Ring says fuck tthat.

To get to the hardest boss in God of War Ragnarok, you just go to the marked berserker locations, smack em up and then find the final man.

he is really fun to fight to be fair

To get to the hardest boss in Elden Ring you have to get one half of a medallion by robbing a homeless person:

he tweaked so hard after i stole from him.

the 2nd half by beating up an angry paraplegic (if this isn't the correct term pls can someone lemme know) :

look i'm the one in trouble here

THEN you take that to a secret elevator

i need a manicure

you then end up here and have to find a secret town:

bring blankie

After finding the secret town you're treated to the invisible locals who have knives that wanna kill you:

thank you miyazaki

after solving the puzzle you get to ANOTHER area:

i wonder if that's edible

murder every innocent being in there to gain access to the SECRET CASTLE underneath:

it's more like a fort really

and take a giant elevator to see her sleeping:

hey!

and... this is all barely hinted at. This boss became a legend, one that could heal with every hit, one that had an "undodgeable move", and I went through all of this just to have a taste of what OTHER people were talking about. Nobody gives a rats ass about the Berserkers from God of War nowadays even though they were front and centre but Malenia, blade of miquella, is still talked about 2 years after the game released and will be for years on. She's a phenomenal design, the build is amazing and, most importantly, she utilises FOMO in the opposite way.

The Berserkers are there to say "hey! i know you have no content left but there's a superhard boss here for you to kill!" so the player does exactly that to get some rewards for a new armour.

Malenia is hinted at in the game but there is so much to uncover to get to her in the first place. And it's all discovered by The Discussion. Where to get the medallion, where the town is, what the puzzle fucking meant, how to beat the Haligtree and finally how to beat that waterfowl dance.

The Discussion loves this shit, there's so much implied, so much to talk about and the developers don't worry about the boardroom created ADHD gamer missing out because, in reality, one guy will find one step, one girl another, then someone else and someone else and that buzz, that wonder that curiosity will fuel people into going for the ultimate prize. Not the boss, not the rewards but the journey itself, the discovery, helping others, finding weaknesses of the boss, finding new shortcuts to get to her, and having it all documented, discussed because any shred of information discovered becomes invaluable in attaining the goal.

The game is FILLED with things like this but I've gone on long enough already, with more secret bosses, unassuming caves containing game changing items, weapons you need to go through confusing mazes to find, From Software don't beg you to engage with their content. They just give everyone a world and relies on every human's unique perspective and desire to help to find out everything for them. You're never going to be missing out when you start, you're just finally joining in.

anyways this was really long, i will make it a youtube video soon. until then, developers, keep it real. I did find GOW fun but Elden Ring will always be something else.

[zzoupz]

oc questions !!! feel free to answer all or none :))

1. tell me about your favorite! (/pos)

2. tell me about your least favorite! (/pos) (stinky awful garbage man *gender neutral)

3. anything living in your head rent free? story concept, single scene without context, oc concept you wont get around to making?

4. tell me about your favorite relationship (friendship included!) between ocs!

5. do you have a favorite oc name? what is it and how'd you get it?

6. anything driving you truly batshit? going insane over them?

7. tell me something sad about an oc!

8. tell me something sweet about an oc!

9. any ""retired"" ocs you still think about?

10. pick a favorite character n tell me three songs you think theyd like!

hihi! sorry this is a bit late I want to get back on my pc for this

1. oh damn I have multiple favorites! I think ones that I enjoy the most (at the moment) are them

(yellow: Lee Harrison | blue: Bryan Dickinson)

they are basically a (in the 2000s) newbie punk band formed by two friends who are like brothers to each other. they bonded over both having not so great families (not like tragic-backstory awful but yknow. the average traditional family)

yeah I still can't figure out what their band name would be. yeah since 2020. sorry. such is life.

while they're not the ones I've wrote the most about, as in not much at all, I just really like them :)

2. Bartholomew. I used to like him then I realize how generic he is so I hate him now (/j) (yeah I actually do want to post about him less though)

3. been thinking about the dynamic normal human x immortal who finds them in every life. so simple and common but I go insane over it every time. I think it would be fun

4. ohohohoho man ok here are some in no particular orders

Time & Denial core, Denial/Dan (black hair, also the last image) is by @/ akamavarii

they were basically our coresonas, but they've became their own characters at this point so I think it counts

friends who commits OSHA violations together!!!

they share 1 brain cell and takes turns over it like an Xbox (quote from ami himself)

Iandithas & Lumeous (if you noticed one of the name changed its bc I did)

a bard & a wizard duo who are retired and are now a shopkeeper & a chemist

its funny I care about them this much bc Lumeous was supposed to be a dad and a side character to my other oc and Iandithas was a doodle of a random guy and now they mean the world to me

there have been like 5 people who pointed out that they look like a couple and you're right and I fucking hate that you're right. and they were roommates etc

Overseer / Conqueror

this one is new very obviously but I've been thinking about them for a LONG while.

friends to lovers to enemies heehoo heehoo heehoo heehoo heeh

can you tell I like it when queer relationships

5. Fakzky HAS to have my favorite origin. fun fact there's a bot on facebook that would combine the names of their followers (only if they request, don't worry) and it was my source of inspo for my fantroll names in 2020, Fakz is the only one I took completely from it and the post is still there!

6. the 35 awesome and cool animatics that exists in MY mind

7. oh man I don't wanna say something sad :( mostly bc I'm bad at it and it would sound cringe :(

8. I have a plague doc oc and she has 3 pet rats ^_^ they're all named after murderers from the bible but yeah whatever

(Dias Cain Jael in that order btw)

9. hmmm them I think. I make stuff about them way less nowadays but still draw them time to time. Cath is from 2018 and funnily is originally a fusion of two characters. and Danya is from early 2021 when I was just trying stuff out. I made them friends just cuz I think they look like they would do drugs together

10. I have no idea man I created them not know them (I am so so bad at this)

[theoreticalli]

handing you specific tav asks if you’d like them: general 4, story 1, romance 4!

hiiiii sadie I meant to send you some too, I'll do that as soon as I post this :)

Ithkara Nacoile - they/she - Seldarine Drow - Beast Master Ranger

General 4 - What sort of general actions raise or lower their approval?

Any kindness to animals or other civilians will be viewed favorably. They’re generally supportive of peacemaking, protecting as many lives as possible, and generosity. They don’t support lying in friendly circumstances; they appreciate genuine, earnest responses. Being selfish will upset them, but talking your way out of a situation will inspire them. They also will be impressed by most Wisdom skill checks, especially nature or animal handling. They won’t appreciate assumptions about them because they’re a drow, but also won’t care too much about how you handle drow enemies. Don’t make fun of them for being awkward and earnest. Also, they’re a godless nature commie, so stealing is all good by them.

Story 1 - How does your Tav advise the pc when it comes to the Dream Visitor?

Ithkara is, like, absolutely a little in love with their visitor. He’s sweet, he’s hot, he has a lot of the same goals and perspectives on how they should be moving forward as them. The’re very disappointed that he’s (at my current in-game point) usually inaccessible. soooo… if you wanna listen to yours, they’re not gonna say anything.

Romance 4 - Do they have a special romance scene at the tiefling/goblin party?

oh boy I'm putting a cut on this one bc I literally just wrote out most of their scene lol

They’ll be sitting out by the boat on the beach, to the left of Wyll. If you talk to them, they’ll say:

“I’m a little overwhelmed by parties. Too many people. The rumble of the waves is better company for me. Or maybe just more… selective companionship.”

If you choose to stay and continue talking to them, they’ll say:

“Of course I mean you, silly. Sit down, help me finish off this bottle, and let the chatter blend into the tide. It’s nice, I promise.”

If you try to initiate romance, they’ll say:

“What do you— Oh! I see. Uhm. Well, this feels a little public still. Meet me later, once this has all settled down?”

Later that night, you’ll meet them in the same place.

“Hey. Hi. I— uhm, I thought could we— oh, damn. The words won’t get in order. Listen, I- I’m pretty good at the physical stuff, but I’m not too practiced with the— feelings. And… I don’t want this to be like some quick roll in the underbrush. So if you can be patient with me—?”

If you respond affirmatively, they’ll relax and say:

“Thank the gods. Okay. Well, maybe we can… sit next to each other? Is that a lame way to start?”

You settle down next to each other again, closer than earlier. Then they’ll say:

“Look at the stars. They’re so clear tonight. You know, when I was younger, my auntie told us stories about the Celestials being in the stars. I thought they were like little faces up there, looking down from the ceiling like the bats in the Underdark. I was a bit disappointed when I saw they were just… lights. Not too disappointed, though. They are awfully pretty. Just like, uh, I mean, you’re like— gods, that’s stupid. Never mind. Forget I said anything.”

If you’re kind, they’ll relax again. They will then take your hand to help point out different constellations, and the scene will fade out.

Other possible dialogue snippets:

“Not that I have anything against the tieflings. They deserve a night like this. I just don’t think I deserve to be in the way of… whatever that mage is doing to try to impress his siblings.”

“You know, I never thought there’d be anyone I would choose to be around if I had the option to be alone instead. So… good job? It’s nice to have friends.”

“I’m sorry, but… I don’t want to go back over there. I’ll see you in the morning, I guess. Goodnight.”

“No, I don’t want you to ‘bring the party to me.’ The opposite, actually. Please go away. I’d like to be alone.”

[fortunatelyenchantingtaco]

Do be so interesting to read fandom history cause while i did gain interest in fandoms really early for my baby self, it also mainly took place in a ru**ian speaking part of the internet

And the fun part about being a country that just doesnt generate any revenue or is uniteresting to basically anyone. Is that while yeah i was paranoid to keep all separate (which could have been better but whatever) its also blessedly so free of any and all lefal rights. For multiple reasons, tbf, its not only the fact that people were greedy and didnt want to pay. Soviet union just didnt have proper laws about intellectual property, and people just got access to the internet, and, more importantly, everyone was poor as shit. The piracy was thriving in parts because no actual people wanted to go into Ukraine and try to restrict the internet. Like hell we were buying discs of games and such, but those were pirated too

But torrent sites were so abundant it was not even funny. They still are, just a bit prettier, and less likely to give you a malware you purge for the next three days from you pc. Like when i tell you i was surprised you can get fined or smh over streaming from the wrong site i was flabbergasted. Yeah. The same thing with fandom content, the cursed ru**ian site i was on simply did not care. No one cared about any ownership. Hell, this was technically positioned as a social medie but became really dark at some point, doxxing was way too common. And there were ‘asks’ which is basically you take on a role of a character and answer questions and post. In the later years they also got littered with legal rules but for the longest time it was just. Nothing

It do be funny how its all connected not even to the fact that Ukraine is a new country or the fact that our government just refuses to police internet (aside from when it comes to our neighbours. Thsi yeah). Its all deeply connected to the simple fact that a) all fun content wasnt in english 2) we are simply not making any money to the creator regardless. How are you going to send cease and desist to a country where that shit doesnt even work

Like yeah there was a lot of scary shit. If your family/friends/people in your city would found out that you were queer or were writing queer? Oh yeah that could result in losing basically everything. But even that was more common in our neighbour and ukraine is simply just. Idk. People are very tired and deeply do not care because even if youre not participating in stuff like that your lifelihood is dangling on a threat every day cause economy is shit and everything is shit. Most people are genuinely too tired to go and doxx someone, and im not joking rn. I would love to say its better rn but its deeplt deeply not now we are at warl

To be completely honest, i do think fanfiction writers deserve to have commisions and everything and have the option to be given shit for their work. Fanartists do, and the main reason writers dont is because for whatever reason, legally speaking, it can be argued that the person is paying for the artist’s interpretation or a charater so its not a crime. Idk it may vary between different countries its just what i heard people at mine say. Its always much more finicky when it comes to writing and there is no walking around it which sucks ass but whatever i guess. I think it was just a bit more of a pressing issue in my circles due to everyone being sad depressed poor and writing to take control of their lives in any way possible but not much space to be actually creative and try to live on writing books

Damn sorry this is not a rant just an observation of how different fandom experience is. Due to me being like in A Lot of asks i was speaking with a lot of writers and with no one who draws so idk their part of the story. Drawing asks were also there btw, can still see people occasionally post the “hi ask me questions” art. So yeah i kinda. Was marinating in this

[rainofdauwuand0w0]

Random games I would like to see come back into existence/Get a sequel

The Munchables: a game I had randomly found during the days of wii’s time in the spotlight, and it was fun playing as smol fun little creatures that having the time of their lives, eating the tabemon monsters made of food on their world, glad to help their current leader with dispatching these evil food creatures, and gaining robo from the end (smol robotic friend of eating that dealt with speed running levels) it was a fun game and deserves to be cherished. And especially granted a sequel. 

Gigantic: this game, this game was got me actively enjoying the Action MOBA that it was and due to just how fun it was, my younger brain thought that it would survive due to how fun it was and obviously having a community willing to play it, but my younger mind was sadly wrong as money is what keeps the lights on, and the game (due to still technically being in beta) was not getting enough traction in the eyes of most to give the game a chance thet it deserved, if the servers were not shut down, I would be playing it on my xbox right this second damn it, because it was a fun game with interesting places and an interesting art style that kept you hooked in. But sadly I know now that we need to take care of games similar to or like gigantic. But if gigantic were to come back online and I was informed of it? I would play it, afterall, it would be nice to be back on the airship.

Titanfall (3):I know it seems like bit of weird one amidst these more obscure games but, I want a new Titanfall game as well as many others, I ain’t gonna pester devs (I am trying to become a dev myself, pestering someone about something already regularly makes someone wanna not do the thing you just asked them to do, if they wanna do it, they will do it) But I am understanding of those who want a new Titanfall title, apex may not be my style due to being battle royale but it marked a point and allowed for respawn to have a stand and a firm place in game making, their own sort of pillar, but with being a fan of the fast movement, the sliding about, jumping into a giant robot mech as a pilot felt badass and the movement system led into that so hard, allowing speed to be the focus, speed was the key, with wall running as well and all the differing abilities, weapons, and titans you could pick, it felt like a nicely rounded out buffet with Titanfall 2 but now...it feels like the buffet has closed, sure there is stuff like NorthStar pc servers that freshens up the game but...I want something new that everyone can experience, no matter their playing point

[transmissionsfromthebattlefield]

DEVOtion, Day One

DEVOTIONAL. I called it “a bunch of nerds in a room” last year, and I stand by my previous classification of this excruciatingly nerdy event. Keep it wack, Cleveland.

But indulging in nerdy activities also allows one to see some impressive musical acts, engage in fascinating conversation, and see friends old and new that you’ve been waiting the whole year to get all in their faces calling them what they are: “NERRRRDS.” In short, it’s one of the most weekends of the year.

Fridays at DEVOtional are usually held in the tavern of the Beachland Ballroom, yet so many tickets sold this year that they had to move it to the main room. It was truly surreal. Yet it worked like a charm, and if anything, it just extends the excitement of Saturday, so if it’s what we gotta do to get all those nerds in that goddamn room, I’m good with it.

A good pal of mine, Malcolm Tent, truly opened this year’s installation with a set of “unwanted DEVO songs.” He’d been advertising it on Facebook for at least a week leading up to the event, and it definitely lived up to the hype. While I expected an acoustic set from the times he’s previously played DEVOtional, he instead unleashed a slew of mind-crushing electronic loops straight out of the rubber factory as he gestured the lyrics to “I Desire” like twisted spoken word. David Kendrick, who drummed for DEVO, frankly obliterated the skins for the last half of the set as Malcolm shredded his yowling electric guitar with a loose drumstick. It was beautiful, and dare I say it was the best set of the weekend. But we’ll get to Fight Milk in a bit.

Malcolm was also the one who recruited me to create the art for the back of an album exclusive to this DEVOtional, DEVOted. It’s an intentionally bootleggy compilation of live tracks from past years, and it’s pretty damn DEVO all around. I’m proud of how my back cover turned out, and I’m glad I was able to lend a hand.

The BIG news was this year’s most esteemed first-time attendee, Mark Mothersbaugh himself. I remember the state of disbelief I was in when I saw his name on the DEVOtional flyer when it was first made public. Just about everyone who has ever gone to a DEVOtional had been going back and forth about Mark’s not being there for years, and he finally decided to give it a shot. There he was on Friday night, taking videos of bands on his phone and excitedly talking with his loyal followers. When I reminded him that I fake-punched him in New York last May by waving my fist at him, he took my wrist and yanked it at his chin and made me actually sock him. I could actually feel it in my fingers for a few minutes afterwards. During one of the bands I looked across the room and saw him take a giant bite out of the sleeve someone’s copy of oh, no! it’s DEVO. After the weekend was over I got to see photos on Facebook of him with other people’s phones in his mouth. He. Got. CRUUUUUNK. And it was glorious.

Max got to nerd out to him about Mark’s brother Jim’s old school electronic drum kit from the seventies, and Mark filmed him doing it, so that footage exists on Mark’s phone. Ah, technology.

Very serious.

The Akronauts, who mixed energetic DEVO covers with originals, followed Malcolm. They brought the fun and the funky basslines. Poopy Necroponde, who turned my brain inside out last year, followed, though this year they probably got closer to blowing my ears out! I’m glad my ears got the break they deserved after this weekend, especially from Morgan PC’s hardcore de-vo squelches and voiceboxes! Both bands really bought the fashion, with white jumpsuits and neon blue berets respectively. The latter’s bass player remains one of the coolest women in existence with her stage presence alone.

I completely missed Weird Paul Petroskey’s closing set, which I’d been highly anticipating, because I was too busy having a conversation with an old school University of Akron alum outside, so I bought some of Paul’s CDs to make up for it. That was a reoccurring theme of the weekend: missing things because I was too busy being engaged in gripping talk with cool elders.

For such a shakeup, it ran smoothly as ever. Every act was energized to the max, and there was really was plenty of great conversation to have, whether it was with old friends, new friends, or Mark Mothersbaugh hopped up on Bloody Marys. It was a pretty damn great prelude to the jam packed Saturday that followed.

Also, look at how cute we are!

[delicrieux]

—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER

extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 

pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao

author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao

ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist

You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.

A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?

Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.

A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”

mother i crave violence

sensing evil energy rn!!

i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖

^with peace and love shut the fuck up

“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”

You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”

Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.

“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 

rip headphone users

i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears

yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭

To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.

Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 

queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?

Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie

akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.

Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.

There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.

The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.

nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!

^pack it up girl defined

“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”

You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 

“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 

i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 

shes trying give her time

ya dig??? y not capeesh

what scene from the godfather is this lol?

“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.

Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎

You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”

The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.

Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:

I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.

You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.

“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”

NOW she considers it

well....

if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3

Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”

Onto the bio:

You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜 

“What the fuck did I just read?”

The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.

The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 

But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.

No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.

“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.

WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????

tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be

^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell

look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling

It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.

What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.

Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.

YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 

...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.

You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.

“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.

“What?” She grits.

“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”

“What did you do now?”

“I made fun of men on Tinder.”

She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”

“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”

“Y/n.”

“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”

She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.

Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.

You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(

my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?

Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 

Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!

You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?

my husband Not jealous.

Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”

He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!

my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.

You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao

my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?

You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs

my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)

Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.

hope you liked it!! xx

[jade-parcels]

👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕

The bunnies’ other jobs!

From my bunny cafe au

((I am so peeved :((( I had this all written out!! And I deleted it by accident!! Darnnnnn!!!))

Anon asked “You mentioned that some of the bunnies have day jobs so do they all have jobs outside the cafe or just a few?” (Something along these lines…again…I deleted it by accident 😔)

👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕

Diluc/‘Angel’

After his father got bored with the wine industry, he passed the whole company off to Diluc on his 18th birthday in order to shift his focus to mining. Diluc found himself swamped with all kinds of business decisions while just barely being an adult. He expanded the company and hired some very trustworthy people to handle things for him so he could finish college

When the business was given to him, Diluc and Kaeya had an explosive fight over it. Kaeya felt like he deserved to have some say in what happens to the business, he’s still a part of the family! But Diluc refused to let him in on any decisions so Kaeya packed his bags and left (not before cussing him out in front of their father, staff and business partners). He was just in a silly, goofy mood. They’re fine now, not on the best terms but they do chat and meet up for lunch on occasion.

He is filthy rich, he couldn’t spend all of his all of his money if he tried, so he doesn’t really need the job at the cafe! Kaeya got him the job because he knew his brother was stuck in a weird, antisocial funk and needed some fun in his life

Diluc loves this job, he has a great time, but it isn’t his main job. His priority will always be the family business!! If he has to quit his job at the cafe, he would in a heartbeat

👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕👯‍♂️💕

Kaeya

Kaeya was going to go into the police academy but was scouted out by a modeling agency. They had seen him at Ragnvindr company events and thought ‘well damn’ so they gave him a pretty generous deal

Kaeya makes a good living off of modeling, the tips and paycheck from the cafe. He rakes in cash pretty quickly just cause he knows how to get it. That, and his dad sends him checks every other month as well. Kaeya thinks of it as ‘I’m sorry’ money. He isn’t wrong

He doesn’t travel much for modeling, which he doesn’t mind, so he kinda just hangs around the city with a lot of free time on his hands between photo shoots. That’s why he got this job at the cafe! It gives him something to do and it’s fun as hell ;)

Albedo

Bedo is one busy bunny. He finished college early and is getting his masters degree online. He works most days at the cafe and on the weekends, he tutors other college students in bio/chem/science related subjects

(He was actually Xiao’s tutor back when he was failing chemistry!! Xiao is very thankful for Albedo’s help!!)

His dream is to become a biochemist, he’s always been interested in cells and what makes up living beings. So having a career in that field would make him the happiest man alive

His mother and sister live outside the city in a more rural area so he spends a lot of time FaceTiming the two of them! Klee is always so excited to hear about Albedo’s experiments or the people he’s met while working in such a bustling, fun city :)

Zhongli

Zhongli is a simple man! He’s a bunny waiter and an artist

He creates intricate pieces based on folklore from different cultures, focusing mostly on dragons. His favorite medium is paint, he loves painting on glass and layering the panes in order to create a 3D piece

He sells his works to galleries, shops and anyone who wants them! As long as they appreciate the story behind the artwork. Sadly…He undersells his work. He could def be making more money but he just does not desire money or material goods the way others may

So he got his job at the cafe in order to help out his dear friend Ningguang, not for money, he only planned on working there for a month or two until she got more bunnies but…he ended up really loving the people he works with :’) he looks forward to working with them now and texts/calls them outside of work to meet up for lunch or bowling (such an old man thing to do omfg)

Dainsleif/‘Sweetie’

Dain was a bouncer at another bar before leaving to come to Celestia’s! He’s good friends with Beidou, they belong to the same motorcycle club so when she was talking to him about the lack of security at the cafe/bar, he stepped in to help out

Little did he know…he’d actually become a bunny…And like it

This is his full time job now, he doesn’t have another for the time being. While he is a bunny at the cafe, he still keeps an eye out for any threats to his coworkers and has access to the offices upstairs (Ningguang’s office and the security office)

When he isn’t waiting tables, he’s upstairs in a tank top and sweatpants keeping an eye on the security cameras and talking to the other security guards through their ear pieces

Ajax

Ajax is a student who doesn’t really have much time on his hands

He mows lawns in the summer and he’s quit his job as a cashier to come work at the cafe! He mostly works night shifts his cause he’s still going to school aaaaaand he’s on his college’s swim team! He’s about to graduate so he works close with his coach to help train the others on the team

He doesn’t really want his family knowing that he skips around in a skimpy bunny outfit and fucking customers most nights but I mean…They’re bound to find out if they see him in pictures people post

Xiao/‘Tofu’

Xiao is an art student!! He wants to be a tattoo artist :)

He’s already got one sleeve of tattoos, it’s unfinished but you can’t really tell just by looking. When he isn’t at the cafe, he’s either in class or shadowing Ganyu, his best friend and tattoo artist. Their art styles greatly differ, she focuses her craft on cutesy, colored tattoos, but she is skilled. And Xiao looks up to her

Xiao admires Zhongli too, they met at the cafe and when Zhongli found out Xiao wants to be a tattoo artist he told him that once he’s licensed, he wants to get a tattoo from him :’)

Baizhu/‘Honey’

Baizhu is a (mostly) full time pharmacist, hence why he isn’t usually at the cafe

He also has a niece, Qiqi, who he babysits often. He loves her very much so he has no problem watching her! Baizhu will even bring her to the pharmacy with him when he’s swamped with work. In the break room, he has a play kitchen, coloring books and a bunch of puzzles to keep Qiqi occupied while he works :)

When he’s not at work, he’s at home resting. He has chronic pain flare ups in his back and shoulders that can make life miserable :( he has plenty of good days that outweigh the bad! And as a pharmacist, he has access to any medicine he needs to make his life easier!

Dottore(Alain)/‘Doc’

Alain’s an oral surgeon who’s a little bit….too into his job

He isn’t phased by blood or gore so he’s easily able to conduct procedures that would make other squeamish. He’ll pull teeth, put in dental implants, remove rotten tissue, any of that without even flinching

Outside of that, he works at the cafe. He wears a mask in order to avoid being recognized even though at his job as a surgeon, he’s usually wearing a medical mask anyways. It’s just a precaution

This has nothing to do with his career but he used to be a tap dancer and actor so he’d join in on local theatre shows! He helped build sets when he wasn’t rehearsing. He doesn’t have time for that anymore (which kinda makes him sadddd) but he has all kinds of theatre playlists on his phone and in his car that he’ll sing along to

Scaramouche/‘Boss’

Scara’s job at the cafe is his main job! His side job is something you may not expect from such a grump

He works at an animal shelter! In fact, he brings cats home to train so they have an increased chance of being adopted. Someone is more likely to adopt a potty trained, socialized cat than a feral cat who doesn’t know what a litter box is. So Scara brings them to his apartment for some one-on-one socializing, training and cuddling

One time he offhandedly mentioned working at an animal shelter while he was working at the cafe and sure enough, three separate customers from the cafe came by to adopt!!! Only one actually took an animal home but he was still surprised that those people had listened to him and cared enough to come by

Scara is a jerk most of the time but when he’s at home…by himself…With a lil kitten sleeping in his lap while he plays games on his PC…Yeah, he softens up a bit

So as you can see, we have a very diverse group working at the cafe! They’ve all learned a lot from each other, come to appreciate each other’s friendship and come to help each other out when one of their coworkers is in need or upset.

[i-put-the-yan-in-polyandry]

i've been thinking about a sagau x monster prom crossover for DAYS

usually my brainworms give up by now but nooooooo

it's just nonstop so i'm gonna share some of it with you in hopes that it'll either go away or at least give someone some amusement

the main premise is god!reader being a member of the cast, not one of the main prospects but they show up a lot (or they are one of the options but, y'know, like the most difficult route bc the requirements need like a perfect run to meet & even then it's treated as a one off thing (you're devoted to your people/protecting this poor soul from them))

the entire cult was isekai'd and the others can make appearances, but you tend to try and avoid intervention bc you know this is a game and you don't know if it also counts as yours (either way you're pretty set as teyvat's god and you don't think they're willing to share, gotta protect the world, the coven would be proud)

i see the cast seeing you as kinda boring in the 'doesn't resort to violence, murder, or drugs and actually gives a damn about the less fortunate????' but also that puts you closer to the 'must protect' category with blobbert and scott

zoe is the only one who actually knows that you're mx god of gods and the two of you vibe on being more ancient and powerful than everyone else while usually being depicted as the more normal or harmless than the rest (aside from particular moments, like Zoe lashing out, but those are triggered by an outside source)

please feel free to troll the fuck out of leonard and maybe kill and revive him a few times can't be arrested if he's not dead

i feel like your secret ending would revolve around finding a way back home and like maybe creating a way to go back and forth so you can still spend time with the pc bc you gotta give them that satisfying ending (or maybe they come with idk it won't last)

fucking love imagining the various possible scenes where people find out you're not as harmless as you seem, maybe a full run of that could be a second secret ending

honestly really like the idea of god reader meeting damien's dads for some reason??? but like damien's my fave and i love him and his dads and their relationship so it's not surprising

BUT AGAIN WITH ZOE

the two of you can totally complain about your cults (yours is an "organized religion"? ok whatever) together and how over the top they can be, but you definitely count yourself lucky that yours is so much better (though i suppose they do get better in one of zoe's secret endings, you'd probably cameo there)

calculester would love you, finally one of his friends has a fucking MORAL COMPASS (the coven too)

let loose sometimes tho, you gotta keep up with the shenanigans

PLEASE punch the interdimensional prince in the face

also it'd be so cool to hang with valerie and you're not monster enough for the slayer to go after you so you and aaravi can hang too!

omg talking video game stuff with aaravi she'd be so interested in the artifacts and weapons from teyvat

you can hear the narrator btw & sometimes discuss with him how much you can do without messing up the game's progression (letting you build up a whole ass unofficial empire w/ your group behind the scenes, the advice on how to keep out of vera's sights and away from any in-game powers (the only real threats, let's be honest here) is op)

any time anyone says anything like "but that's impossible" you can just pipe in like "since when does logic apply to spooky high? just ask [player name]"

yes you say player name there :)

AND IMAGINING THE WEEKEND AND LUNCH BITS NOW BYE

just it's so fun???

ALSO ALSO LET'S TALK SPRITES

i'll leave most of it to your imagination but you could totally give cameos to your faves! like half the genshin cast (ok that's an exaggeration but shhh) can transform, just like, kffjsdjgkslk wisp venti or birb xiao chilling on your shoulder??? carrying around a fox yae??? idk how canon it is but ik a lot of people on here like talking about a smaller dragon zhongli and like just keep him on your shoulders it's perfect

[lonesovereignty]

MHR Sunbreak Weapon Thoughts

Since Capcom has shown us what stuff all the weapons will be getting in Sunbreak I just wanted to throw my thoughts out there on weapons I'm excited about for people curious. Some may be short and some may be long :P. I'll also probably make another post for weapons I think were left to the wayside.

All the new Greatsword moves are really... great. This is a weapon I wanna definitely try out, the new combo moves look like they feel great to hit. The new stance is what really sells for it me though, it looks super satisfying to do. Overall Greatsword looks like a new weapon and they did a great job.

Longsword was the weapon I mainly used in Monster Hunter World Iceborne and Monster Hunter Rise. I am very glad they made this weapon fun in Iceborne and still fun in Rise. The Harvest Moon skill is pretty neat, but the biggest thing for me is the new sheathe. The animation is so damn cool, its everything I ever wanted out if this weapon and the attack it allows look even cooler. Longsword users has absolutely been fed this time around and I'm here for it.

I've tried out Dual Blades in this game a bit and they're more satisfying to use than ever before tbh. The air spiral attack gives it that nice oomph I look for and the new combo makes it more mobile while attack which is always a strong point with these weapons. I'll give em a try.

I have not played either lance weapons until I tried out Gunlance in base Rise in which it is fair for me to say: I suck at it. It's very fun though!! I like the added mobility it has with blast dash and the new weapon skills seem to only add to make it more fun with more explosions lol. A weapon that makes explodes monsters has been appealing to me lately. (hence my recent decision to pick up GNB in FFXIV) Hope they are able to fix up what people complain about which is the low damage.

The Insect Glaive was something I always liked since they introduced it in MH4U (one of my favorite MHs). It may not be as overpowered as it was back then but the new moves has made me more interested in wanting to play it. I am glad they brought back the MH Gen move where you can chuck the bug at monsters, and the new aerial attack looks really fun. Insect Glaive mains are absolutely thriving in this expansion and it is a weapon I am absolutely trying out at some point.

Last but definitely not least! The Heavy Bowgun. I really enjoyed using this weapon in previous Monster Hunters until they changed it up in World. I'm not a huge fan of World Heavy Bowgun since they removed Siege Mode from the weapon and it never felt the same as it did before. This ultimately led me to switch to Longsword lol. Fortunately they're bringing it back, the one thing I loved most about this weapon! My baby is back and it's definitely the weapon I am going to be mainly using in Sunbreak.

Closing thoughts

Sunbreak is seeming to turn out to consume my life for a good bit and I am okay with that lol. I'll be playing on the Switch version but eventually I'll hop on to PC and play both versions for friends.

If you've managed to read all this, thanks it means a lot to me.

[annashittyglasses]

Attack on Stoners

Aot characters and what they’re like when they’re high.

A/N: happy 4/20, to those who participated, hope it was a good day! Modern!AU setting.

CW: heavy drug use. Marijuana.

Master list

Eren

It’s his hobby

Super chill tho.

Will always smoke out his friends

Either sits in a dark quiet room in silence

OR sits in a dark room listening to trippy music

Literally minds his damn business. That and he’s most likely in another dimension to even have a reason to fight with anyone.

His thoughts are coherent, but when he speaks, it’s straight up a made up language.

Mumbles a lot to himself about god knows what.

Armin

He talks so much

He doesn’t really know his limits

He’s greened out a couple times

Has cried a few times

His body goes limp when he’s high.

His eyes glass over

Watching planet documentaries when he’s high breaks him every time.

Like think of the old Dell PC error message

Mikasa

Always paranoid about Eren

Mom-kasa

Definitely keeps to herself

Will randomly look at Pinterest every now and then

She likes being warm so she’ll always be wearing something comfy when she smokes. Especially her scarf

Even though it doesn’t seem like she is, but she is actively listening to everyone.

Always has to check in on Armin.

Never has really enjoyed a high before. Even though she is high, she is more focused on the wellbeing of Armin and the whereabouts of Eren.

Will probably just take two hits. She knows her limits very well.

Levi

Surprisingly talks a lot

Def feels a bit more open with people

Very chill

Likes listening to Tame Impala

When Erwin looks at him. He will start to geek.

Has a strict no staring policy. Bc he will geek. And the cadets have never seen him laugh or smile.

When he catches himself about to lose it. He’ll wave his hand in front of his face and says “and scene”

He actually doesn’t even think about cleanliness when he’s high. If something is dirty he makes that a tomorrow problem.

This man sLEEEEEPs after a good smoke. Bc he doesn’t really remember his nightmares and dreams when he wakes up.

Actually enjoys being with everyone. But just doesn’t physically show it.

He HATES being touched in the slightest when he’s high. That’s the one thing that freaks him out.

Screams if he’s touched.

Erwin

Very confused

Can’t tell if he’s actually high or not

Reality definitely begins to blur

Sits in silent, deep thoughts.

Swears he hears music when it’s silent

Slowly looks over to Levi and just grins

Will occasionally start laughing for no reason bc he’s thinking of something funny.

The concept of time trips him out. If he comes out of a deep thought he’ll ask what time it is.

Once he realizes only 3 mins have passed, his mind is blown.

Definitely keeps himself together. Thinks about his composure more than he needs to.

Hange

Writes in their notes app about their experiences

Has a list of weed, the strain, and experience every time they smoke

Asks other people very philosophical questions

Asks Levi a ton of questions, which he ignores

They’ll bring up funny memories of their time with Levi and Erwin.

Loves playing fun games. Like truth or dare.

Has other people do things for them bc they’re too tired to even move.

Loves to be on the couch. Then just letting their head fall back on the cushion and close their eyes.

Just give them airpods and they will stop talking....eventually.

Connie

Everyone knows when he’s high.

Very chaotic

Super out of pocket comments

Writes down snack ideas for Sasha to try

Literally says the funniest things

If someone asks how he’s doing, he’ll just text an out of context meme to the group text as a response

There is not and never will be a single adjective to even describe Connie while he’s high

Sasha

Just giggles to herself

She’s just lost in her own made up world in her head

Eats literally everything

She’ll even order everyone UberEats and pay for it.

Always has Snapchat open on the filters and will take pics of anyone. No one is safe.

Literally has to do everything one step at a time if someone asks her to do something.

She’s actually quite mobile when she’s high. A little more on the high functioning side believe it or not.

Reiner

The first time he smoked, he had a spiritual experience.

Like the moment he ripped the bong, another realm inside his head just opened up.

He literally disassociates half way through a conversation. Then would pick it back up where he left off 10mins later.

He’s literally all over the place. But tries to act cool and like he’s done it before

Has a staring problem

Says a lot of “whoa dude,” “that’s fucking crazy,” “wild.”

Will just casually say, “...so anyways, I’m the armored titan and he’s the colossal.” As he points over to Bertolt.

Bertolt

Made him anxious when he first tried it

He didn’t really want to smoke. But naturally Reiner handed him the pipe and lit it for him

He sits in absolute silence.

Then all of a sudden you just hear “whoa”

His eyes get so red.

He ain’t subtle.

He’ll tap Reiner’s leg every time he starts to trip

He’s always on the verge of tears when he’s peak high

Everything around him is in slow motion.

Always on high alert that Reiner will say something he’s not supposed to bc he’s the armored titan and Bertolt is the colossal

Jean

Will act like he’s the coolest guy in the room. Always feels like he has to one up people.

Acts like he smokes all the time, brags about it, but they all know that’s a lie.

Connie will call him out on his bullshit

Literally has no idea how to smoke. He has no idea what he’s doing.

The only thing he’s ever had that was remotely close to weed was a CBD edible.

Will always try to bug Eren, but Eren does nothing bc he’s just trying to vibe.

After a while, once his ego cools down, he’s actually pretty enjoyable to be with.

He’s funny, easy to talk to, asks questions, and actually engages in conversations.

Likes having music playing in the background, but not too loud so everyone can talk.

He gets really into the science and art of wine tasting. He rants about it for 45mins.

Really likes the storytelling camping vibes and love hearing and telling stories about their time in the survey corps

At some point he goes on tinder

[rallamajoop]

The Witcher: The Games vs the Books part 2 – Characters and Accents

So, I've already talked at length about the relationship between the Witcher books and games, but how well they captured individual characters is its whole own subject – and you’d better believe I have enough thoughts on it for a whole extra post.

Andrej Sapkowski's skill for creating vivid and engaging characters really is so much of what brings the books to life, and no matter how much work an adaptation might put into worldbuilding and plot, it's the characters you've really got to nail to get the long-time fans on board. Especially when you’ve done what the games have, framing themselves as a direct continuation of Sapkowski's story. Nothing invites comparison to your source material like basically forcing fans to read the original novels to understand even half the backstory alluded to in-game. 

So how did they do? I can only offer my opinion – characterisation is necessarily going to be a lot more subjective than just telling you what plot points the games contradicted outright – but like any fan, I have opinions in plenty.

Of the main cast, I feel Yennefer is the character they've captured the best. They've done just as well with some supporting players – I have no real complaints about Dijkstra or Phillipa, for example, who are favourites of mine in both games and books. For the main players though, Geralt and Regis seem to be the ones who's differences I'm most inclined to forgive, whereas I don't feel like they've done Ciri justice at all. Book!Geralt is much less of a smartarse, for one thing, whereas Book!Ciri is much more of one. But if we're talking about the differences, I’m afraid we really need to start with Dandelion.

Dandelion

For all the genuinely good work the games do with characters, old and new, I don't think I can overstate what a disservice the they've done Dandelion, who I could not stand in TW3, but is now one of my favourite book!verse characters. Alas, Dandelion is a prime example of something the Witcher games really don't do well: camp. Being the archtypical bard, Dandelion is about as flamboyant as any enthusiastically-heterosexual man can be: you should be able to spot this guy by body language alone, he should be flouncing around and he should talk like a spoiled noble auditioning for Shakespeare. Book!Dandelion is over-the-top and ridiculous and just so much fun, and I loved him well before I'd even really gotten into the rest of the books around him.

Here's just a bit of dialogue from one of his first appearances, to give you a sense of how he and Geralt play off each other.

The  bard  seized  the  fingerboard  of  his  lute  and  plucked  the strings vigorously. ‘How would you prefer it, in verse or in normal speech?’ ‘Normal speech.’ ‘As you please,’ Dandelion said, not putting his lute down. ‘Listen then, noble  gentlemen,  to  what occurred  a  week  ago  near  the  free  town  of Barefield. ‘Twas thus, that at the crack of dawn, when the rising sun had barely tinged pink the shrouds of mist hanging pendent above the meadows—’ ‘It was supposed to be normal speech,’ Geralt reminded him. ‘Isn’t it? Very well, very well. I understand. Concise, without metaphors. A dragon alighted on the pastures outside Barefield.’

Though TW3's Dandelion certainly looks the part, you have to go hunting through art from the Gwent cards to find much that comes close to really capturing his personality (see left pic below – though even there, a Dandelion who'd voluntarily break his treasured lute is a very hard sell). Though a lot of fanart does better (right-below – credit goes to Tatiana Ortaliz).

But as poorly as the games capture his flamboyance, they're not that much better when it comes to taking him seriously. TW3 left me thinking he was all talk and no substance; the books make abundantly clear that he really is renowned enough to be welcome in courts across the continent. Though he often overestimates what he can talk himself out of, he isn’t stupid either: he's lectured at Oxenfurt, spied for Dijkstra, and then there are the moments where the frivolous playboy mask slips and you realise he's sometimes much better at understanding people and relationships than Geralt will ever be (which is honestly kind of funny considering how many of Dandelion’s relationships end with plates being thrown at him from an upper story). He's not at all above mocking Geralt when he deserves it either (and especially his personal and relationship issues) – Geralt will happily mock him right back.

We never do learn how they became friends (I'm pretty sure the incident listed in the wiki is just the date of their first expedition together, not their first meeting), but Geralt just doesn't form lasting friendships or romances with anyone he can't have an intelligent conversation with. And Dandelion is a damn good friend to Geralt – one who, despite being a helpless, squishy little bard, will keep Geralt's secrets under torture, or will follow him into Nilfgaard in the middle of a war simply because you don't let a friend make a trip like that alone. (Seriously, I don’t ship it nearly as much as some, but hot damn there is some material in here if you do.) In short, it's basically inconceivable that he'd leave an amnesic Geralt wandering around Vizima alone, as he does in the first Witcher game – which is the kind of thing I can mostly forgive as a gameplay conceit, only it doesn’t really get better from there.

He’s also supposed to be blond, something I don’t think is technically specified until fairly late in the novels, but 100% what I’d been picturing since his first description as a man in a colourful bonnet with cornflower-blue eyes (let’s face it: Dandelion’s hair isn’t the only thing about him that screams ‘blond’). It’s a shame no-one from the games to the show to the novels’ cover artists seem to have noticed – but at least there are some fanartists out there who were paying attention (credit for these goes to Asphaloth, Ghostcupdraws, Hvit-ravn (tumblr deleted), 94355 and itsmespicaa).

As for the games? Well, I cannot speak to how Dandelion came across in the original Polish, but I think it speaks worlds about the priorities of the English version that they didn’t even bother to cast someone with a halfway-decent singing voice as their master bard. There are isolated moments of dialogue that come close to sounding like book!Dandelion– mostly in Witcher 2, which comes closer to capturing the spirit of the books than either 1 or 3, or his attempts to convince his captor he's a disguised noble when you rescue him TW3 – but his voice actor is just painfully ill-suited to the role.

Geralt

Geralt fares much better than Dandelion, though he’s still a little hard to square with the Geralt of the books. Book!Geralt spends a lot more time sulking, just to begin with: he sulks because his job is complicated and gets him no respect, and because the world is unjust and unfair – and, most of all, he sulks because Yennefer has dumped him again. He also gets mocked for sulking, and usually deserves it. Book!Geralt is generally a lot more taciturn and a less prone to making smart comments just to have something to say – arguably because in book!Geralt's world, making smart comments often ends at the gallows, or at least with some corrupt official making your life much harder. Book!Geralt's world kind of sucks, and he's just got to put up with it.

As much as he often plays into the expectations of being an uneducated monster hunter, he's also got a more of an intellectual streak than you’d guess. He may prefer to stay out of politics (because damnit, his job is to save people from monsters, not people who are monsters), but he attended school at Nenneke's temple and has even taken classes at Oxenfurt academy, and there's a lot of thoughtful nuance to his opinions – his speech to Ciri about why he can't in good conscience take a stronger stance against the Scoiata'el contains a wealth of historical perspective, just for one example. Even his smart comments tend to be, well, somewhat smarter in the books.

Book!Geralt’s explicitly a lot younger than Yennefer – around 50 is the usual estimate, falling far short of the 100-ish the games suggest (the scandal of having a man fall for – gasp! – an older woman clearly didn’t bother Sapkowski one bit). You don’t see nearly as much "I'm getting too old for this" from book!Geralt, who's really not that old by witcher standards, and is apparently still hunting monsters long into his future. I'm also a little annoyed by the way they play off his hatred of portals like he's a grumpy old man who doesn't like mobile phones, when his distrust originally came from having seen the gruesome deaths that result when portals go wrong. This is not to say Book!Geralt lacks other ordinary human flaws, however – twice in the last two books of the main saga, he gets severely sidetracked after his ego gets the better of him (in the adulation he receives after being knighted, then after arriving in Toussaint), and it's quite some time before he properly gets back on track for that whole rescuing-Ciri thing again. He’s also pretty hopeless when it comes to romance and relationships – breaking things off gracefully is really not in his skillset.

So why does game!Geralt not bother me more? Well, he's the main player character of a game franchise, and one who has to carry the experience largely solo. Some adjustments for genre are pretty much inevitable in that position. He's certainly fared better than Meve, for example, who's been softened far more from her book characterisation for her PC role in Thronebreaker. Then there's the whole amnesia thing – it's easy to believe that sort of experience would change a man – and if he doesn't sulk so much as he used to, maybe he's grown up a bit. Geralt's also in many ways the straight-man of Sapkowski's Witcher universe – there largely as the reliable centre for other, louder personalities to play off. But I expect the real bottom line here is that I do still like game!Geralt enough to forgive him a lot of what he lacks.

The books never do describe Geralt as being very attractive – something book-based fanart often tries to reflect. The point has been made before that the rather-alien-looking Geralt of the first game (left pic above) is probably a lot closer to his book-description. However, the main distinguishing factor you’ll see in book-based fanart is probably the ubiquitous headband, which genuinely is what book!Geralt wears to make his hair behave (the example on the right above comes from Diana Novich).

All that said, if Sapkowski really wants me to believe that nearly so many women are eager to jump into bed with him, I’m going to have to shallowly assume our witnesses are unreliable on this front, and Geralt is at least as attractive as Witcher 3′s take on him. Nothing else makes sense. *g*

Regis

Regis varies mostly in that book!Regis is a lot more smug, sometimes verging on obnoxious – and a lot keener to make fun of Geralt (who generally deserves it). But then, Regis is old and wise and superpowered enough to dance rings around most everyone else – can you blame him? By Blood and Wine, Regis' overconfidence has been recently smacked down hard after his near-death-experience at the hands of Vilgefortz, and that kind of thing could knock some chips off anyone's shoulder. Throw in the fact that with Dettlaff, we have a situation not even Regis could make light of, and the changes to game!Regis make a certain amount of sense.

I do feel it's a bit of a shame that the vocal direction didn't work just a little bit harder to capture some of Regis' smugger side, or emphasise that his long-winded philosophising on human behaviour is supposed to sound a bit pretentious. This is actually something I suspect they were going for a few times in the script, but which didn't come through in the dialogue quite the way it was meant to. Still, again, I'm sure I'm biased by the fact that I like game!Regis far too much to find much fault in what they've done with him. They've done a lovely job capturing his friendship with Geralt too.

Looks-wise, there's a tendency in book-based art to portray Regis with long hair (even some pre-Blood-and-Wine Gwent art did so – see the two pics on the left above, from Gwent and early B&W concepts. The right-most pic is cover art from the books). I couldn't rightly tell you where long-haired-Regis comes from, though – perhaps it's described more explicitly in the original Polish, or perhaps it comes up in passing in some passage I've forgotten, though it may just as well just be a fannish meme.

The books do describe him as looking rather like a tax collector, slim, middle-aged, with an aquiline nose, prone to wearing black, and his hair as 'greying' or 'grey streaked', so presumably somewhat younger-looking than the game would have it. The hammer-horror-esque sideburns are likewise a game-verse addition, though I do like the look they went with – it's distinct from Geralt in a way that making him another long-grey-haired man wouldn't have been, and that's probably the point.

Being the hopeless Regis fan I am, I have quite the folder full of different fanart takes on book!Regis, so have a selection – art here is by gellihana-art, justanor, greysmartwolf, Nastyaskaya, NatalyLanier, beidak, natalliel, ellaine and afternoon63. For what it’s worth, I feel beidak’s (bottom pic, second from the left) comes the closest to what I’d have pictured personally, based on how he’s first described.

Ciri

I find it much harder to rationalise the changes to game!Ciri, who I didn't exactly dislike, but found stuck too close to the role of generic-macguffin-girl-who-just-wants-to-be-normal to be very interesting. Having read the books, not only do I much prefer book!Ciri, I'm not sure I can emphasize enough how much the game did NOT prepare me for utter gauntlet of whump and misery that girl survives in the last four titles. Book!Ciri is a character who works for me mostly because of the same flaws the game mostly strips her free of – TW3 makes some token noise about how you can't tell her what to do, but she’s an utter little royal brat when we first meet book!Ciri, and it’s so much of what brings her to life. She throws herself into her witcher training with the enthusiasm of a kid going completely native, but still revels in getting to be girly for a change when Triss first arrives at Kaer Morhen. She hates Yennefer at first, but soon bonds with her just as strongly as she ever did with Geralt, picking up some of Yennfer’s haughty mannerisms along the way. And then she gets thrown through a portal and lost in the distant wilderness, and the whole world comes down on her head.

The build up to the first time Ciri actually has to kill someone is intense... and things only get worse from there. Steadily. For another couple of novels at a stretch. Seriously, a major caveat that pretty much has to go into any rec for these books (and I will absolutely rec these books) is that Ciri's story gets heavy. So heavy one finds oneself using phrases like, "that time that one guy died of his wounds on top of her while semi-consensually feeling her up was honestly one of the less traumatic incidents in the period."

By the end of the novels, Ciri has nearly died of thirst, been beaten, tied up, dragged around the country as a prisoner, run with bandits and killed innocent people for the fun of it, done fantasy-cocaine and got a tattoo, fought off more than one attempted rape, been drugged, lain for multiple nights next to an impotent elf who completely fails to impregnate her, watched the bodies of her friends and girlfriend being mutilated in front of her, and did I mention where she got that scar? She has survived hell, and it is absolutely a testament to her own strength that she somehow comes through it and puts herself back together at the end. When Geralt finally arrives to rescue her, what matters most isn't that her ordeal is over, but that she finally knows she hasn’t been abandoned by everyone who’d ever loved her after all.

The Ciri of the books is fierce and wild and arrogant, but she's learned her morals from the best, and she holds onto them until she can't, then picks them back up again when she can, and above all she survives. For all that her story turns arguably too much of the last two books into a slog of misery, oh boy does it pay off at the end. And that's probably about as much as I can say about her Big Moment in the last book without spoiling too much, so suffice to say that by the end of the saga, Geralt has pretty much become a supporting character in Ciri's story, not the other way around. (Seriously, you’d be surprised how few chapters of the last two books he’s actually in.)

Finding art which captures the aspects of Ciri’s character and history which are missing from the game has turned out to be pretty hard, though the fanart above from her bandit phase takes a decent crack at it (credit to Loles Romero and NastyaSkaya). I do rather like that one shot of her on horseback beside her girlfriend too, which comes from Denis Gordeev’s illustrations for the novels (below).

How much of this does TW3 get across with her portrayal in the game? Well, she's still pretty headstrong, I guess. And they let you give a 'sorry, I like girls' answer in one bit of dialogue, so they remembered her girlfriend existed. That's nice. But game!Ciri still has a kind of wide-eyed innocence that book!Ciri lost years ago, while book!Ciri is a little force of nature in ways the games hardly even hint at, and that's a really shameful loss.

You'd think, with a character so young, it ought to be easier to imagine she's simply grown up since we saw her last, but so much of what's changed about Ciri feels like a step back rather than forwards. I can shrug off Geralt and Regis' differences and still enjoy their game-verse-selves, but Ciri leaves me genuinely disappointed.

I’d say the official art that comes closest to capturing book!Ciri is that one portrait of her as a very grumpy young child (right above). Some of the early concept art (left above) feels a little more like it has her attitude, though she’s rather too yellow-blonde – not to mention too pretty. I think it also bears pointing out that Ciri isn’t really supposed to be the kind of beauty she is in the game – even before she gets what’s meant to be a seriously ugly and disfiguring scar. (Fanart below by justanor and bobolip)

But of course, the male gamer fanbase can’t be expected to give a fuck about a girl they wouldn’t want to fuck, so game!Ciri must be generically gorgeous. Le sigh.

Triss

I suppose I should at least touch on Triss, too, though she's a very odd case. She's so out of character in the first Witcher game that I am wryly amused that the biggest thing they arguably do get right is that taking advantage of Geralt the moment he showed up with amnesia is... pretty well in-character for her (look, I gotta be honest here, I'm not much of a fan of Triss in any of her incarnations).

The second game does a much better job with her – she actually feels like book!Triss, she has some good dialogue, we're finally dealing with some of her conflicted loyalties to the Lodge and to Geralt – though by the third, her characterisation has been so softened into “the nice one” that none of that potentially meaty conflict is ever resolved, or even really mentioned. Perhaps there's more buried in the Triss-romance path, which I've never bothered with, but the writers seem to have just given up on dealing with anything that might make her look less than wholly sympathetic. Heck, we hardly even get a clear statement about why she and Geralt broke up between Witchers 2 and 3.

Even speaking as such a not-a-fan of Triss, I promise there is more they could've done with the character the books give us. There's her ongoing trauma in from the Battle of Sodden, where she was injured so badly she was memorialised as one the dead: the 14th of the hill. There's her furious impatience with the neutrality of both the witchers and the Lodge: Triss has fought and died for a cause, and is ready to do so again. The second game sort of gets into this, but by and large, the games really aren't up to tackling the moral complexity of having such a theoretically-sympathetic character as Triss, who was still broadly willing to go along with the Lodge's plans to pair Ciri off and get her pregnant as soon as possible – her own wishes be damned. No, instead, Triss has conveniently left the Lodge before the rest of them go spiraling into abject villainy in the second game, clearing all that messy grey stuff out of the conflict.

Of course, the really big unresolved plot point still hanging over book!Triss is how badly she needs to terms with the fact Geralt's just Not That Into Her, and never has been – but since the games want Triss to be a serious romantic option, that's definitely not getting the resolution it could've used.

Book!Triss also pointedly avoids any outfit with a plunging neckline because her chest is covered with the ugly scars she received in the Battle of Sodden, something the games did not have the guts to reproduce. In a more confusing note, the books do consistently describe her hair as 'chestnut', which we'd usually think of as meaning 'brown' – though it turns out the games actually may not have been wrong to make her a redhead, since in Poland 'chestnut hair' apparently mean dark red hair (google some pictures of actual chestnuts, and you'll see why). Still, the firy-red-haired Triss of TW3 who wears nothing but plunging necklines remains a bit of a stretch, however you slice it. Once again, TW2 gets her best (and I must say, gave her the nicest outfit) – though even here she's conspicuously unscarred in all her sex scenes.

(Leftmost pic above is official Witcher 2 art, whereas Triss-with-scars fanart comes to us – once again – from nastyaskaya)

Shani

Shani sort of falls into a similar category as Triss as someone who isn't terribly well-served by any of her appearances, given that both exist in the first game largely to compete for Geralt's attentions. But I can't honestly say I find Shani’s portrayal in the Hearts of Stone expansion to be much better – the degree to which either version exists solely to fall all over Geralt is a bit painful, especially given that their relationship in the books is limited to a single, undramatic hook-up. Book!Shani really only appears in a couple of chapters: we meet her as a medical student friend of Dandelion's, who's been surreptitiously selling pilfered university supplies to fund her degree, then later see her again in the final book, where she proves herself as a battlefield medic during the climactic Battle of Brenna. She's pragmatic to a fault, and I really can't see her as the type who needs Geralt to point out to her that her patient is dead, for example, or who'd subject a guy with Geralt's problems to such an extended feelings-dump as you'll get out of her during the wedding.

Shani is a reasonably logical book-character to bring back, if only because she’s one of those who explicitly survives the ending, but for my money, "serious contender for Geralt's affections" is just not a role she works in.

Anna Henrietta

The duchess of Toussaint, Anna Henrietta, is another case who differs more from her book counterpart than you might think. In the books, the duchess is by far the least competent of the (pleasantly many and) various female leaders and rulers we meet – she comes across as rather young and naive, and every bit as absurd as everyone else in the ridiculous fairy-tale duchy she rules. She is, for example, most displeased to learn that Nilfgaard's war against the north is ongoing (something her courtiers have carefully avoided mentioning in her presence), because she'd long since sent the Emperor a stern note demanding he brought it to an end. She promptly has one of her ministers sent to the tower for misinforming her, and demands the others prepare an even sterner note for the emperor, which will surely do the job.

After Dandelion (inevitably) cheats on her, she has him repeatedly sent to the gallows, only to change her mind and send him a reprieve at the very last minute each time. Picture yourself a much younger and prettier version of the Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland, and you've about got her general vibe.

Blood and Wine sort of waves at this part of her character when she first speaks about Dandelion, and again in suggesting there's a widespread feeling she lacks compassion, and once more as she proves utterly immovable on the subject of her sister. But the generally sensible and insightful woman you deal with for most of the main story is a far cry from her book-verse characterisation. That’s a bit of a shame, because I feel like there's a lot more they could have done to blend the two versions of her. Still, it’s hard to argue the duchess we get suits the story being told around her.

Other characters

Much as I love Yennefer, Dijkstra and Phillipa, I don't really have much more to say about them because I feel the games have done such a good job. The Yennefer of the books gets to show a lot more depth and complexity simply because she has more scenes and more space in which to do so, but when ‘there isn’t more of her’ is your biggest complaint, the game is officially doing pretty well. I could certainly gripe her about how “dresses in black and white” seems to have been taken as “dresses in black with maybe a trace of white trim”, or how Yennefer and Triss seem to be the only sorceresses in the world capable of wearing pants, when Phillipa (just for one) is in sensible men’s clothing the very first time we meet her, but that’s getting into serious nitpicking territory.

(Not that Yen can’t look amazing in outfits with more white – art by Emily Caroll, theclashofqueens, BarbaraRosiak, and cosplay by greatqueenlina)

Vesimir, Lambert and Eskel, Geralt's fellow witchers from the School of the Wolf, fall into a similar category for me – though we spend far less time with them in the books, everything we see of them in the games feels like a fairly logical extension of their book-roles. Vesimir is somewhat over-played as the old fogey, and his death is painfully cliched, but the impact on the characters and Kaer Morhen still hits home – and the games do some especially great work expanding Lambert into a much more complex character. To my mind, the only shame is that more of the book-original characters didn't get the same treatment.

Who have I missed? There's Avallac'h, of course, but I think I've got him pretty well covered by that last post. Zoltan, perhaps inevitably, has had his personality largely flattened into 'generic dwarf', with nothing better to do than hang around Geralt and Dandelion. You wouldn't know Book!Zoltan was apparently incapable of turning away women and children in need, for example – even human women and children with the chronic inability to say thankyou for his help. Or that he eventually admits to Geralt that the luggage he and his friends are carrying comes from a decidedly unsavoury source for such a supposedly charitable, upstanding guy. Yes, even Zoltan gets to be a morally complicated character in the books – who knew?

Speaking of dwarves, pleased as I am that Yarpen Zigren gets remembered in TW2, he's an odd one to talk about, since even in the books, he appears to have had a substantial personality transplant between his two main appearances. Yarpen’s a largely comedic figure in The Bounds of Reason short story, where he cheerfully admits to having considered letting his men knock down a particularly pompous aristocrat and piss all over him to teach him a lesson, but he’s evolved into a studious voice of reason against the scoiata'el by Blood of Elves. TW2 doesn't do a particularly good job of capturing either version, which I suspect probably bothered me more than most people – I liked the later book-incarnation of Yarpen immensely (and not even just because he's one of few ever to really call Triss out on just how much she needs to stop misreading Geralt's friendship as anything more than it is). His chapter in Blood of Elves packs a hell of a punch.

On the subject of accents

I do have to wonder if I'd have warmed up to characters like Triss, Shani and Dandelion (or even Letho) more if they'd only had halfway decent voice actors. It's not just that none are exactly leading the talent at the acting part of the job, it's that their American accents stick out in TW3 like a sore thumb.

Geralt mostly gets away his own US accent by dint of being the very first character we meet, so we've gotten used to the way he talks long before we notice how he stands out – hell, maybe that's just how they talk down in Rivia (hilariously, book!Geralt eventually reveals he's not even from Rivia, but simply picked the place and taught himself the accent so he could feel a bit less like the abandoned foundling he is, which only gives us yet more excuse for why his accent might sound a bit weird). More importantly, Geralt is meant to stand out, to be the outsider wherever he goes, so having him sound like no-one else fits the character.

But neither Triss or Dandelion are "of Rivia", and by the time they show up we've had dozens of hours in a game where literally everyone else sounds British, or Scottish, or Irish, or vaguely-eastern-European in the case of the Nilfgaardians. So why do these weirdos sound like no-one else on the continent?

The short answer seems to be that every character with an American accent in TW3 is someone who had an American accent in at least one of the previous games, which were way looser with their casting and had enough incidental American accents around that they didn't stand out. Clearly, by TW3, consistency with prior games has been prioritised over consistency with literally anything else we’re hearing.

Gaetan is an exception to the rule as the only new character (at least that I caught) with an American accent – presumably because between Geralt, Eskel, Lambert, Berengar, and Letho (and cohorts), some sort of 'witchers have American accents' rule has been pretty well established (another random American-accented witcher shows up in Thronebreaker, just to underline the point). We're going to mostly ignore Jad Karadin here, since his British accent is presumably a recent affectation to go with his new identity, and so makes sense.

This still doesn't really work though, since Letho’s school is all the way down in Nilfgaard (land of the Eastern European accents), while the oldest witcher from Kaer Morhen (Vesimir) is the one guy with a British accent. He sounds nothing like any of his students, despite the fact he's logically the guy they ought to have learned their accents from. So the logic falls in a heap however you slice it, and I'm thrown right out of the game.

With TW3 as your intro to the series, it feels almost as if characters like Triss and Dandelion have been assigned American accents because they're just too important to be saddled with the same pedestrian British accents as everyone else, which did nothing to endear them to me. The only one I eventually warmed up to was Lambert, and then only because he's just such a bitter asshole that he eventually goes full circle and comes out the other side (somewhere around when you've heard his miserable backstory, then gotten drunk together and told him how much you love him, man). Gaetan similarly snuck in under the same clause – American accents clearly work better for me in this series when attached to characters you're supposed to find pretty insufferable on first impressions.

Some final notes

To conclude, it seems only fair to throw in a quick nod to some of the more memorable book-characters who don't appear in the games. Neither Mother Nenneke (Geralt's sort-of-surrogate mother) or Vissena (Geralt's biological mother) ever appear either, alas – Vissena doesn't even merit so much as a Gwent card, which seems quite the wasted opportunity.

Milva, Cahir and Angouleme – the three remaining companions of Geralt’s who died alongside Regis but who were not so easily resurrected – naturally don’t appear. But nor are even really mentioned in all the games, which seems rather less than they deserve after giving their lives to Geralt's cause.

Cahir and Angouleme do at least have pretty badass Gwent cards to their names, though I am properly offended that Milva (who has the dubious honour of being my very favourite book character who doesn't ever appear in the games) is stuck with a card of her freaking death scene – which not only gets the scene wrong (believe me, there was no grimacing and gripping the arrow buried shallowly in her chest for poor Milva), but doesn't even bother to get her hair the right colour, for fuck’s sake. Basically, Milva was a stone cold badass and absolutely deserves better. #justice4milva

One can only guess how I'd have felt about some of these characters had I read the books before playing the games – I am obviously biased towards forgiving changes to characters whom I liked in their game incarnations, regardless of how they compare. Still, I think it does speak wonders that there still all these characters who suddenly made sense only after I'd met them in the books.

Even if only for Dandelion and Ciri, I can only dream of seeing a bit more of the book-original characterisations make it into the collective fannish consciousness. There's nothing wrong with getting into the canon purely based on the show or the games, but having read Sapkowski's novels, it's no longer any mystery how they spawned this massive franchise. That the saga wasn’t even fully available in English until well after Witcher 3 was released – a solid couple of decades late, and long after it had already been translated into Russian, French, German, Spanish and more – is a real shame. For once, it’s us in the anglophone world who’ve been missing out: these books deserve so much more than to be thought of as a footnote to the games or the show.

[defilerwyrm]

For the ask meme: burning bright, anything about the parts at the table with the Nein. You write their banter so well!

FIC SPOILERS BELOW!

Burning Bright on AO3

The entire dinner scene hit me like a bolt of lightning while I was working on this fic. It started with Beau’s outburst, and then Veth’s willful denial and subsequent fit, and I built the two scenes around that.

Diving into particulars….

“Uhm,” he said, intelligently, but quickly recovered and flashed his friends a smile. “It is most impressive. Certainly a step up from a tiny hut.”

A direct reference to the name of the spell. Originally it was Leomund’s tiny hut. I have no clue why in 5e Wizards decided to 86 the attribution names on so many spells like Otiluke’s resilient sphere and Tasha’s hideous laughter. Things like that always made me curious about the (what I assume were) PCs the spells were named after. I had thought maybe it was because the characters who diegetically invented them were specific to one setting, but in that case I don’t know why Bigby’s hand is still Bigby’s but Evard’s black tentacles are no longer Evard’s. I don’t like it. As an aside, Widowgast’s Nascent Nein-Sided Tower is, mechanically speaking, Mordenkainen’s Magnificent Mansion. Anyway. Moving on!

It was delectable that Caleb wanted to impress him.

This boy hungry and not just for soup

Flustered, Essek tried to fend them off, but it was Caleb that did him in. It was always Caleb. The human took a large roll from his own plate, broke it in half, and offered one of these parts to Essek, who tried his best not to choke.

“You need to keep your strength up, ja?” Caleb implored him quietly.

The steady hand that accepted was a point of pride because it very much wanted to quake. The Kryn weren’t bread people, but...did he have any idea what this gesture would mean in Rosohna? Any inkling at all?

This is another one of those places where I delight in playing to cultural differences. What I’d had in mind for what that gesture—breaking food into two pieces and offering half to someone—WOULD mean in Rosohna was a bit nebulous, as I like to keep the reader guessing a bit and let their imagination fill in the blanks; but my rough idea was that it’s a courting gesture that signifies “I can and will provide for you, even if it means less for me.” An expression of selfless caregiving and an offer of partnership. Not wholly unlike a bird bringing food to a prospective mate.

And actually it’s a little bit funny coming from Caleb, who has fuck-all to his name but his name, when Essek is a rich bitch who answers directly to the Bright Queen.

Not that he was about to say it out loud, but he was a quick convert to this whole bread thing. To say that it won him over would be an understatement. That seemed to be a recurring theme here.

I imagine if I’d grown up never really eating bread and was introduced to it in adulthood I’d be like “Where have you BEEN all my life?!” But also: the bread is friendship, the bread is the Mighty Nein, the bread is communion in the spirit of sharing rather than politics and appearances and power plays—things he thought he was fine without until they were foisted upon him.

Somewhere in the course of the multiple conversations going on at one time, Jester got an Idea, as she was prone to doing. He became increasingly aware of her talking about kissing, of all things, and this culminated in her shouting above the din, cheeks flushed purple though he hadn’t seen her touch any wine: “I have an idea you guys! Why don’t we all go around and say how many people we’ve kissed?”

Jester is the most wonderfully convenient deus ex machina if you ever need to insert an awkward or embarrassing conversation among the Mighty Nein, because this is exactly the sort of shit she would do.

Jester leaped up and slammed her hands onto the table. “Caduceus you’ve never been kissed?! That’s so sad!”

The firbolg was unfazed. He merely shrugged and said, “It hasn’t come up and I haven’t gone looking. Not something I’ve ever thought about, really.”

Jester’s tail lashed back and forth behind her like an overstimulated cat. “Do you want me to kiss you?”

Fjord went a bit wild-eyed at this. Caduceus smiled gently and said, “No thank you.”

Three things about this part:

1) Jester’s tail doesn’t get NEARLY enough mention in fic! If I’m playing (or writing) a character with a tail you can be damn sure you’re gonna know what it’s doing! Makes me wanna play a tabaxi tbqh.

2) Cad’s “No thank you” is the sum total of his sexuality, lol. Jester was raised in a pretty highly sexualized setting, didn’t really get out much before she fled Nicodranas, and can be pretty naïve, so she doesn’t really get the whole aroace thing; but it never crosses Cad’s mind that this would be “abnormal“ or ”sad” in any way—it causes him no distress, as it shouldn’t. This is yet another “Same planet, different worlds” moment.

3) Fjord is physically restraining himself from yelling “JESTER WHAT THE FUCK” lmao

Veth kept picking at it. “So you’re um. You know. Into the fellas?”

Beau snorted. “I could’a told you that months ago.”

“Yeah you could’a!” Veth pouted with a self-conscious curl to her shoulders.

I saw a comment on Tiktok that said Veth was being borderline homophobic, but that wasn’t my intent! It’s just that she inherited a certain blind spot for male queerness from her player, and as hard as she’d been trying to encourage Caleb to hook back up with his female ex, it never occurred to her that he had a male ex, too—and given that they’ve been so close for so long, she’s feeling pretty self-conscious about the fact that she never figured out that Caleb is bisexual in all that time, as well as kind of upset that no one—Caleb especially—told her. She’s having a moment of “Why didn’t I know this? Did you think it was going to change things between us? Did I make you feel unsafe?” And also a little bit of “Okay well, now I have to get him to hook up with TWO people AT ONCE because my boy deserves threesomes 😤”

Jester went goggle-eyed at him. “You’ve only been with one person?” she exclaimed. “But you’re like a hundred years old! And very handsome. I would have thought you’d get like, all the ladies.”

Ladies. Right.

Veth might not be the only one with a certain blind spot.

Beau gave her a funny look, snorting. “I dunno, he seems like the kinda guy who turns down those offers left and right.”

..…But Beau’s got his number, for more than one reason. She’s got super gaydar, for one, and has him pegged as the type who’s very choosy about his partners (also mind you, this was before demi!Essek was canonized by WoG, so I was still rolling with my hc that Essek got around when he felt like it).

The uproar was instantaneous. Everyone—almost everyone—started talking or shouting at once. Beau’s voice rang out among the din with, “HOLY SHIT ESSEK FUCKS.” Strangely pleased with himself, he downed the rest of his wine in one gulp and spent the next few minutes fending off increasingly prying, personal questions until the Nein grew bored with his lack of answers and someone changed the subject.

There it is, the line that spawned two entire scenes!

He was not a war mage, but he was experienced and wily, and he was damned good at what he did, and as long as there was breath left in his body, the Mighty Nein would not fall here.

Joke’s on me, motherfucker literally has the War Caster feat -_-

But like in my defense, that’s just what it’s called in the book. The feat just means that you have either the training or experience to cast well during a fight, which I see as not necessarily the same thing as a war mage, which was my way of saying an arcane caster who is a soldier.

Veth stared at her blankly as if willing herself not to understand. “Caleb? With who?”

She breathed steadily. “...Essek. Caleb and Essek.”

Beside her, Jester squealed and brought her fists to her face.

Veth was less enthused. “WHAT.”

Beau’s mental commentary here is dead on. Veth still doesn’t really trust Essek at this point and has been pretty vocal about that…despite being the one to declare him part of the Mighty Nein? Eh, she’s allowed to have complicated feelings on the guy, all things considered. But I find it kind of comical and very Veth (and very Sam) for her to be all full of zest for trying to get Caleb back together with the frigging Volstrucker who is actively working for his abuser and worst enemy but balk at him hooking up with Essek.

Jester “explained” in a delighted yell: “Caleb and Essek are gonna fuuuuuuck!”

I don’t know, is this too unsubtle to call foreshadowing? The line flowed naturally in the dialogue, but it’s also letting the reader know exactly what they’re in for next, lol.

“...He’s going to break that little elf twink, you know,” Veth said, sounding distant. Seemed she was having some difficulty processing. Not too surprising, considering how adamant she was about wanting their wizard to hook back up with his old flame, the fucking Volstrucker. “We’ve all seen his dick.”

This was 100% taken from Sam’s little throwaway line “It’s above-average” but it turned out to serve two purposes other than reminding the reader that all of these people have seen Caleb naked:

1) It’s yet another thing Veth thinks she understands about him but doesn’t. Caleb’s a top like Dalmatians are purple and if you disagree then I respect your right to be incorrect ;)

2) That said, it is, in fact, foreshadowing for the sequel, in which Essek experiences a great deal of frustration. (I haven’t touched the damn thing in weeks, feels like; I’ve been too busy with work, being exhausted from work, and being in a tizzy about my upcoming surgery.)

Fjord blurted out, “I’ll join you.”

Poor Fjord has had such an uncomfortable night!

Hoo boy that was a lot. Thanks for the ask, this was really fun!! And sorry it took so long; I work Saturday nights and things got really busy for a bit there.

[metaldragoon]

@justsuha​ filled this out, and I felt like doing the same.  Kinda felt they didn’t have the best categories so maybe I shouldn’t have bothered, also tried not being too repetitive with my picks. Favourite Game - Final Fantasy VI, this was an easy one for me.  One of the first games I ever played, then I came back to it around like 12-14 years old and it was the first game I ever played on an emulator, then it was one of the first games I ever watched an LP on, one of the first game I ever started playing with mods, and yeah, I’ve just played this game a lot in my life. Best Story - Mass Effect (1), could’ve gone with FFVI again but eh, and maybe Hollow Knight but I feel like the world building in ME1 is crazy-deep and unparalleled.  Maybe that’s not story in like a “plot” sense, but it’s what I settled on. Favourite Art Style - Killer7, was a comfortable pick but Persona 5 is also a really crisp game.  Also thought about other things that are more atmospheric like Metroid Prime, Hollow Knight, or Bloodborne. Favourite Soundtrack - Final Fantasy VI, like I said, didn’t want to be repetitive, so there was games that had like a banger of a track like Papers, Please, or something like Super Meat Boy, but I couldn’t really justify anything being equal to FFVI.   Hardest Game - Dragon Age: Origins, Felt like a Soulsborne game was the “gimme” answer so I wanted to swerve a bit.  DA:O is hard as fuck, if you’re not optimizing your build you’re not beating that game.  Even on “easy” I’m like chill man Funniest Game - Paper Mario: Thousand Year Door, was tempted to go Undertale but since that’s kind of just a parody game I feel like it had a lot more liberties it could take to still be funny.  TTYD is super funny while still being like it’s own game. Game I like that everyone hates - Gears of War 2, some kid in Gr. 11 said I should get a 360 and play that, and so I did.  I played the online mode so much, but it never really felt like a popular competitive game.  I liked being so beefy, it’s basically just one-shotting people with shotguns is the meta and so the whole stalking someone to close the gap to be in range was super fun to me.  Campaign kinda trash and my friend wanted to get an achievement for co-op beating it on the hardest difficult that was miserable for me, but I think it’s a really fun game to play with some great audio too, the SFX are top notch. Game I hate that everyone likes - Borderlands, hate is a strong word but man I don’t really care about this game at all and people have been hyping it up for a decade. Underrated Game - Catherine, all my irl friends I tell about this game don’t know what it is, until I remind them and they go “oh yeah, that game looked weird/was too hard.” don’t know anyone who’s actually played more than an hour of it.  It’s one of my all-time faves, though. Overrated Game - Breath of the Wild, my wife says I didn’t give it a “fair shake” but I played like 20 hours and zzz... was tempted to go with a Pokemon game too, but it’s more a franchise in general than a specific game. Best Voice Acting - Yakuza Kiwami, I didn’t really have any real opinions on a game having good voice acting; generally they don’t.  Yakuza is all VA’d in Japanese so that’s probably why, but it felt pretty cool and was the only thing that I could think of actively enhanding a VG experience.  Maybe shoulda gone GTA (3 or San Andreas), both are really dated and definitely don’t sound that good anymore but one of my favourite games to listen to dialogue from. Worst Voice Acting - Metroid: Other M, not bad in terms of the actual talent of the VA’s but damn if it doesn’t ruin everything about Samus as a character.  “REMEMBA ME?!” Favourite Male - Kazuma Kiryu, was tempted to go General Leo from FFVI, but couldn’t find an image big enough before I resized this, which I could have easily worked around, but I also really like the Dragon of Dojima! It’s weird because he seems like such a simple design but he’s just badass in the right way, and I don’t know why more games can’t get it right.   Favourite Female - Franziska von Karma, from the 2nd Ace Attorney game.  For some reason had a huge crush on her, when I was younger I even drew some fanart of her which I ain’t done for nobody but her and Broly. Favourite Protagonist - Samus Aran, wanted to go with a “franchise” character and Samus is always super cool (except in Other M), I’ll always be excited to play her in some new game.   Favourite Village - Kakariko Village, felt like kind of a weird question, ‘cuz like if it was favourite area or something, I could have put some other stuff (Greenpath in Hollow Knight for example), and being a village I feel like basically limits you to medieval games but not the main hub either as that’s “a city.”  But Ocarina of Time’s Kakariko Village is always really fun to roll in to, also thought of the Goron Village, or just any village in Secret of Mana because that village theme is soo good. Most Hated Character - Nathan Drake, have barely even played Uncharted, but I just always hate any character with his personality, and he’s the biggest and most well-known.  Maybe he’s fine but meh. First Game You Played - Super Mario World, can’t say for 100%, but this and Super Mario Kart were games I was playing a lot since at like 4 or 5 my older brother owned them and they’re the most baby friendly.  Also remember playing a lot of PC games that my dad had, Timon and Pumba pinball, Chip’s Challenge, Ski Free, and stuff like that.  Skunny Kart Racing for DOS but I never understood how to get to DOS. Favourite Company - Bioware, I don’t really care about gaming companies in general, but Mass Effect and DA:O are some of my favourite games.  I might say Square as well but they do a lot of stuff.   Hated Company - Ubisoft, don’t hate them all but I just feel like they only make games I have zero interest in. Depressing Game - Doki Doki Literature Club, this and creepy are kinda really similar I feel, but I went DDLC but I kinda forget how it even ends.  I just remember feeling bummed about the purple and pink haired girl, and then the Monika scene just being uncomfortable (in a good way). Creepy Game - Doom3, don’t really play creepy games, Doom3 was suspenseful so I don’t know if that counts.  I had it for like 2 years, played it once for like 10 hours straight, and never played it again.  Still lives in my head. Happy Game - Super Meat Boy, is this a happy game? I don’t know, I feel like it’s got a pumped up energy which I equate to happiness.  It’s fun and the music makes it really addictive. Favourite Ending - Metal Gear Solid, don’t really have a great answer to this.  I really like Meryl and Snake riding off on their snowmobile though.