#but like I'm still not over the one time that I was singing on the annapantsu discord server

[mistymysticalmoon]

Soft kisses, Safe arms

･ jude bellingham x reader ･

prompt: (fluff/a bit suggestive) after a fun night out with friends, you head home to your boyfriend Jude, whose caring, gentle presence is the perfect contrast to the lively nightclub.

warnings: drinking

wc: 1.5k

a/n: leave me requests!

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The sounds of the nightclub were all-consuming.

Music, laughter, and singing overwhelmed your senses, and the alcohol coursing through your body was no help. You’d gone out for a night of fun with your girls and it was now almost 2 in the morning. 

A familiar pounding surfaced as you started to feel a headache coming on, but as you glanced over to the dance floor, you saw your friends awake as ever dancing with each other and random men they must have picked up at the bar. 

You giggle, shaking your head at their antics.

As you take another sip of your drink you feel a buzz in your purse. You pull it out and open your messages to see your favorite contact flash on your screen, as he had been periodically checking up on you throughout the night. 

Jude🤍: Hey baby, having fun?

You twirl a strand of your hair giggling like a schoolgirl at such a basic question, the alcohol making you giddier than usual. 

You: Hiiiiii babyy!!!

I misss yoiuuuu

Jude🤍: Missing you too love ❤️

You: I’m comimg hime soon I camt  wait to kiss yiu xx

Jude🤍: I can’t wait either baby, be safe. 

You smile excitedly, hearting the message, and place your phone back in your purse. Jude was never bothersome or controlling when it came to you hanging out with your girls, something you weren’t used to due to some unhealthy relationships of the past. 

He was very secure in himself and your relationship seeing as neither of you had given each other any reason not to trust one another. 

That and the fact that you were both embarrassingly head over heels in love. 

“Oh my goddd he totally wanted to hook up with you” you hear behind you whipping your head to see your girlfriends laughing and stumbling back to the table you had been standing by. 

“Well I hate to burst his bubble but there’s no way in hell” You giggle along not even fully understanding the story but enjoying the moment nonetheless. 

 “I love you guysss” one of your friends exclaims lovingly causing all of you to burst out into laughter but still returning the sentiment. 

“Okay, I’m already feeling the beginning of my hangover. I think I'm calling it a night guys” you express getting a groan from your friends.

“What you reallyy mean is you’re starting to miss your boyfriend and want to fu-” “Oh my god shut up” you cut off laughing awkwardly causing everyone else to join in on the teasing and banter. 

“We're just teasing babes I think we all need to call it a night.” one of your friends assures checking the time to see that it is well past safe hours for a group of girls at night. 

You all decide to get two taxis, splitting up based on where you live, saying your goodbyes, and heading home. The whole ride back to Jude’s apartment your thoughts are consumed by his everything. You imagine his hands on your body, his lips leaving marks on your skin. You feel slightly embarrassed that he can have such an effect on you while not being anywhere in your vicinity. 

You: Hii Judeee Im comibg home niww

You bite your lip thinking about all you want to do to him once you get inside his apartment, clenching your thighs at the mere thought.

A couple of minutes later you feel a buzz in your lap

Jude🤍: Okay baby, I’ll be waiting. xo

You:❤️❤️

As you sent your last message you feel the taxi coming to a stop. You thank the driver and bid your friends goodbye stumbling out of the car and towards the lobby of the apartment. As you push through the revolving doors you look up to see the very face you were just fantasizing about. 

“Judee” you exclaim rushing up and embracing him. “Hii baby” he chuckles pulling you into a tighter embrace. You look up at him lovingly and pull him in for a quick kiss. 

“Come on, let's get you upstairs,” he gently suggests. You quietly nod allowing him to lead you over to the elevator and up to his floor.

The whole way there your hand stays in his , holding your body as close to his as you possible . He hadn't yet caught on to your intentions, attributing your cuddliness to the multiple drinks flowing through your system. 

As you made it through the door he closed it shut behind him letting go of your hand to ensure it was locked properly. As he did, you slipped off your coat tossing it on a chair across the room. 

Once he turned around you stalked up to him, softly pressing your lips against his in a seemingly innocent kiss.

 “Mmm,” he moaned into your mouth, “Missed you baby” His hands found their place on your waist softly caressing your body. 

You kissed him deeper, hoping he would get what you wanted without you having to explicitly ask for it. “Baby” he groaned, slowly pulling away from you.

“Judee” you whined, desperation and need overwhelming you. 

“Baby.. we can’t,” he says resting his forehead against yours. 

“Why not” you pout, looking up at him with a look you know he can't resist. “Fuck, baby you're killing me” he murmurs shaking his head.

“Please, Jude, please I want you,” you whined running your hands along his chest. You reach up and kiss his neck, one of his weaknesses. He groaned at this but restrained himself from giving in. 

“I’m sorry baby, but tomorrow we can do it all. You’re drunk and you need to rest, okay?” he reasons holding your face softly in his calussed palms. You let out a soft groan hanging your head low accepting that your boyfriend was just too caring and loving to take advantage of your drunken state. 

“Okay..” you surrender, feeling a bit embarrassed of how needy you were being. 

Jude lifts your face to look you in the eyes, smiling lovingly at you and leaving a soft kiss on your forehead. “Come on, let's get ready for bed and you can tell me all about tonight.” You nod in acceptance letting him lead you to the bedroom, your hand in his. 

He sits you down at the edge of the bed as he helps you get changed. He starts with your shoes and then moves on to your clothes removing your skirt and softly pulling your shirt over your head leaving you in just your undergarments. 

You felt a shy heat rush to your cheeks, feeling his eyes on your half-naked form, blushing even though he’s seen you in much less. 

He sends you a cheeky grin before walking over to the dresser, pulling out one of his old jerseys that you loved to sleep in whenever you were over his apartment. He carefully pulls it over your head successfully getting you changed. He then leads you to the bathroom to help you brush your teeth and remove your makeup. 

As he props you up on the counter you watch his careful and attentive movements. So sure in himself as he had seen you do this routine hundreds of times. 

“Okay baby, stay still for me” he instructs, wetting a cloth with warm water and makeup remover. 

“Mmm,” you hum in response. 

You close your eyes and he begins to softly drag the warm cloth along your face removing the makeup as best he can, knowing you're too tired to properly wash your face. You open your eyes to see his brows furrowed in concentration, smiling at how attentive and cute he’s being. 

“You're so pretty” you blurt out. He looks at you with a bit of surprise but laughs nonetheless. 

“You’re so pretty, baby” he retorts. “You're prettier” you argue teasingly. 

“You're prettiest” he finishes off with a chaste kiss. You scrunch your nose at his playfulness as you watch him put the cloth in the wash bin and pull your moisturizer from the cabinet. He gently applies it to your face finishing up your skincare. 

Once finished, Jude took you down from the counter and led you back to the bedroom. You get comfortable under the comforter as he turns the lights out joining you once he's finished. 

“C’mere baby” he whispers. You snuggle up closer to him, his natural musk and aftershave invading your senses. You nuzzle your head impossibly close to his chest just wanting to feel his body close.

“Jude..” you whisper gazing up at him “Yes, baby” he replies. “I love you, so much. Thank you for taking care of me” you murmur, feeling a wave of emotions and gratitude for your boyfriend. 

“Aww baby, I love you.” he coos, leaving a lingering kiss you on the forehead. “I'll always take care of my baby, you never have to thank me,” he assures, gently stroking your head.

 You smile up at him seeing the pure love and adoration in his eyes, feeling so grateful that you have such a loving, beautiful, doting boyfriend.

You reach up to leave a kiss goodnight against his soft lips smiling into it. “Goodnight, my love.” he breathes against your lips. “Night, baby” you reply resting your head against his chest, letting your body relax under his caring and protective presence. 

[verycoolusername1]

But Two Though?

Summary: In which you're so in love with your boyfriend that you see yourself starting a family with him and you obviously had to sing about it!

Track 10 of short n' sweet - juno

Quinn Hughes x Singer!reader

Warning: romantic themes, kissing, pet names, mentions of children, mentions of parenting, and mentions of sex.

A/N: even tho it's a singer reader this imagine also has AFAB!reader(cause of the song lmao) I still use they/them pronouns, no need to worry about that.

Juno is literally so good, and since I gave Nico bed chem, I just HAD to give quinn Juno! Hope you enjoy. And I had this fun idea of embarrassing Quinn when he's with his family on stage last night soooooo

You were estastic when you found out Quinn and his family would be at your concert tonight.

You brushed your hair for what felt like the hundredth time as you calmed your nerves.

Your manager later called you to get on stage, and you rushed there immediately. Your fans cheered as they saw you with your guitar.

"Hi everyone!" You waved to them all.

The crowd roared in excitement as they saw you and sang along to your many songs till the very last one. Little did they know that you had a little surprise.

You finished your last set, and when you didn't go off the stage like you normally would have, your fans grew in confusion but nonetheless enjoyed it.

"You didn't think the show was over, did you?" You chuckled teasingly. "I just have a little special song."

Your fans gasped as the Hughes looked at Quinn for an answer that never came.

"I wrote this song but I'm like never gonna release it." You chuckled. "Might give it to sabs- Sabrina or something. She'll certainly know what to do with it."

Your fans cheered at the slip-up not nonetheless you continued.

"I can't say much about this song, but... it is different from my other songs, different from older and five seconds flat." You explained. You and Quinn were quite private about your relationship, so you didn't want to go overboard on the speech. "I don't know how to describe it, but it made me feel things I didn't even know I would ever feel. This song is called Juno, like the movie Enjoy."

Your fans cheered to your speech as you strung notes on your guitar.

"Don't have to tell your hot ass a thing, oh yeah you just get it." You sang. "Whole package babe, I like the way you fit god bless your dad genetics."

Your mind flashes to you and Quinn in bed, cuddling next to each other in the night. The love you two shared never fading only growing stronger after that night.

"Will this change something between us?" You asked, looking up at him.

"What? No, never. We're still us, you know that." He reassured you.

"Still us." You confirmed in his hold.

Quinn looked at you in confusion. He knew your songwriting, it was a shock that this song was more upbeat and not lyrical there was a hint of fun behind it.

"I know you want my touch for life. If you love me right, then who knows," You hummed. "I might let you make me Juno."

He knew this song was about him, but how? Unless... Oh... oh

You saw Quinn as he interacted with J.T.'s kids and how easy it was to do so. It made your heart swell.

Natalie came up behind you. "You want one, don't you?"

You put a hand on your heart, currently not expecting it. "What?"

"A kid," She clarifies.

Your face flushed as you realized you have been caught. "I mean sure one day but it's too early."

"Well it doesn't help to try now, talk to him." She encouraged.

"Believe me, we've been trying." You chuckled dryly, Natalie on the other hand laughed loud.

"What's so funny?" Quinn was in front of you two now, holding one of the kids at his hip and you couldn't help but wonder... what if that was your kid?

"Oh nothing, Y/N just telling me what an amazing cook you are." Natalie winks at you as she takes her leave with her kid in tow.

Quinn eyed her suspiciously. "Okay... what were you two really talking about?"

"Exactly what she said, how you're a great cook, an amazing one." You lied through your teeth.

Quinn knew you were lying, if anything you was a much better cook than he was but he decided to let it slide and hugged you from behind the rest of the time.

You continued on with the song, getting out of your comfort zone more and more with each line. "Adore me, hold me and explore me, mark your territory tell me I'm the only, only, only, only one."

Luke hums. "This song is definitely was not what I expected."

Jack exclaims. "I'm sorry, did they just say what I think they just said? They just said they're horny on stage."

"You don't have to repeat it." Quinn mutters, his face getting flushed as the song came to a close.

Ellen looked at her son lovingly. "Been together five years and you still get shy when you hear a song they wrote about you."

"Let's not tease him too much he still has yet to ask the question." Jim joked.

"Dad," Quinn groaned.

"You can borrow my ring sweetie, the replica that is." Ellen offers.

"No mom it's not that..." Quinn trailed off.

Jack being the first one to realize, gasped aloud, and shook Luke back and forth. "You already have a ring!"

"I'm going to wait for them backstage." Quinn began to walk away.

"At this rate, we're gonna have to propose for him." Luke mutters, Ellen hit him on the head as a response as they followed Quinn.

When the rest of the family got there, you was already in Quinn's arms looking at him lovingly. They decided to go into their own conversations, letting you two talk alone.

"Did you like the song at the end?" Your voice began timid, the more you grew vulnerable.

Quinn hums. "Yeah, it was nice. Didn't know you wanted a kid with me."

"Yeah, I've been meaning to tell you about that." You look away from his gaze but he quickly gets it back.

"I want to have kids with you too Y/N. If I wanted anyone to make me a father it would be you." Quinn admits.

"You really that?" You said hopefully.

"Of course I do, but I would want to do something first before we get started." He says.

You grow confused. "And what would that be honey?"

"I would like to marry you." Quinn says without hesitation.

Your eyes widened in size as you took in his words. "You want to marry me?"

"I don't have the ring with me right now and I love you too much to say just one speech but I do know that I see myself spending the rest of my life with you, if you'll have me." Quinn looks at you hopefully.

"I'll always want you Quinn, I would be glad to marry you." You caressed his cheek, his eyes closing at your touch.

"I love you guys but please do not make me an uncle tonight." Jack says.

You both glared at Jack who quickly back off, he mutters a sorry and says he'll meet them in the car, Luke joining him.

Once they're gone, Quinn looks at his parents with a shy smile. "We're getting married."

[tamilhobbit]

Speaking as an Izzy hater - I found his character racist, homophobic and despicable in S1, did not see any appeal at all, and then copped a lot of shit from racist Izzy stans on Twitter (I used to enjoy fic that gave him a good arc, but those fandom experiences led me to start avoiding basically anything to do with him). Maybe the demographics are different on Tumblr, but Twitter was overwhelmingly pro-Izzy in a way that didn't acknowledge any of the bad he'd done and was hostile to anyone who disliked him.

I also thought his 'character growth' in S2 was too rushed. Him showing up in drag and singing felt more like Fandom Izzy. Canon Izzy had made a very very big leap there that, to me, didn't feel earned or justified. But I'll freely admit that my poor fandom experiences have soured me against him.

Otherwise, I agree with most of these points. I'm very much a Gentlebeard shipper and I still did not like the portrayal of their relationship this season. I have many of the same criticisms you expressed.

And it's gross that the 'talk it through as a crew' show refused to deal with everyone's PTSD, and even gave Lucius SA-related PTSD and played it off as a joke. Pete was horrifically cruel to him about it. That is one of my biggest issues with S2.

I think the writers suffered from being too involved with the fandom, to be honest. And it affected their own vision of their characters.

I've already said that to me, someone who is not an Izzy stan, the Izzy we got in S2 was much more like the Izzy I saw in fanfics and fandom than the Izzy we met in S1. Yes, Izzy could plausibly have become that person, but it takes a lot of work and growth that I feel they skipped over.

There was also just way too much going on. They crammed too much in and didn't have the time to treat any of it with the detail and respect it deserved. Given the show had to be cut down to 8 seasons, the writers desperately needed to be ruthless in cutting and editing. They needed to take out anything that didn't serve the plot or character growth, so they could focus on the important things.

They didn't.

Anne and Mary, for example. They don't actually add anything concrete to the storyline beyond being a backdrop for Stede and Ed! They serve as symbolism and foreshadowing, sure, but... of what? If we take them as foreshadowing of Stede and Ed, all it tells us is that this idyllic retirement that they end the show on won't actually be a happy ending for them. That they won't be happy with it. Which is a weird choice. Or do they serve as narrative foils of Stede and Ed, as a dark mirror? The narrative isn't very clear about that, to be honest.

The feeling I got was that that they were fanservice. Fans were clamouring for Anne Bonny and Mary Reed, so they gave us pirate lesbians, regardless of whether it was useful. The writers should have cut them and focused more on the plot, or made them relevant to the plot. They didn't.

Fans wanted Zheng Yi Sao, so we got her. Even though the plot ended up making her look a little foolish and incompetent by the end, in contrast to the first half.

Fans wanted Izzy to embrace his queerness, so we got that, even though it seemed like a rather abrupt shift.

Fans wanted more women and POC, so we got Archie. Who just shows up and isn't very well fleshed-out tbh, and ends up breaking up Jim and Olu. (Are they poly? It's only ever hinted at. And then Olu leaves for Zheng Yi Sao anyway. If they then become a polycule, it is entirely up to the fans.)

Fans wanted Stede to become competent and famous as a pirate, so we got that. Fans wanted Gentlebeard sex, so we got that. Fans discussed a soft shore retirement for Gentlebeard with Oluwande captaining the crew, so we got that.

This was some Monkey's Paw bullshit. We got a everything that we'd mused about on Twitter and Tumblr. It just wasn't executed well.

And yeah, even though I dislike Izzy, I do think his death was stupid. And in my opinion, a cop-out. It was like Shadow Weaver in She-Ra - you don't need character growth or redemption if you sacrifice yourself instead! With the double whammy that both Ed and Izzy have been toxic and awful to each other, and this narrative choice basically wriggles out of having to deal with that in any meaningful way.

Question: I enjoyed s1 OF OFMD, but for various reasons I never actually got around to watching s2 (pick up most of the plot from tumblr tho). What exactly went wrong in s2 that got so many people upset?

Oh, boy. Very long rant incoming.

So, for context, S2 had a significantly smaller budget, which necessitated moving the filming location to union-unfriendly New Zealand, reducing the number of actors/number of appearances of established actors, and cutting down the number of episodes from 10 to 8. In a show where each episode is only about half an hour long, that last one alone was enough to seriously hamper any character development or plot. I am very comfortable putting the vast majority of the blame on HBO because of these financial decisions.

The short version is that Jenkins et. al. needed to address and build on the problems left hanging in S1 while also getting the characters to the end of their character trajectories in case there was no S3 while also leaving room for additional episodes in case there was a S3, in a grand total of four hours, and failed.

The long version is that there were a bunch of what I'd consider small problems in isolation that came together and exploded in the S2 finale.

The reduced cast necessitated breaking up the crew (ex: having Swede marry Jackie and stay on land with her, so they don't need to pay Nat Faxon for all eight episodes) and not spending as much time on their relationships as S1 did.

The reduced time meant that the entire season was rushed (in contrast to S1, which takes place over at least several weeks if not months, most of S2 takes place in roughly five days), leading both to a lot of telling rather than showing (because they don't have time to show you), including vital character and relationship development.

This includes:

Having the Kraken half of the crew beat Ed to death after months of being abused by him – abuse that is clearly shown to have given them PTSD and a well-justified fear and hatred of him – only for them to be okay with him two in-universe days later;

On that note, having Stede dismiss the crew's concerns about Ed because he loves him and also we only have three more episodes left to fit in everything so we need to get over it really fast, even though Stede is supposed to be well-meaning and caring (even if he's not good at it all the time);

Resolving the issue of Stede abandoning Ed in one day, then having them "go slowly" in their relationship for two days and then have some spur-of-the-moment sex, and then the next afternoon have them break up over their diverging career aspirations, and then the day after that resolve that problem and retire on land while the rest of the crew sails off into the sunset;

Stede becoming a fantastic pirate captain over the course of one day, becoming wildly popular in the piracy world two days later, and then deciding the day after that to never be a captain again because he is retiring with Ed;

Having Ed and Stede decide to retire together as what is implied to be the end point of their relationship arc, when none of Stede's issues from S1, like his poor self-esteem, have been so much as mentioned by anyone, implying that he's either magically gotten over them or they don't matter all that much, actually, even though they were the catalyst for basically everything he did in S1;

Ed having two separate character crises – "I am an unlovable person" and "I want to do something with my life other than piracy" – not spending a lot of time on either one, having moments that clearly indicate he is still working on both problems and they have not been resolved, and then apparently having them both be resolved in the final episode despite nothing occurring to actually make that happen, and in regards to the latter, despite the story actively undermining it by repeatedly showing he can't do anything other than piracy;

Related to the above, Ed ending the series as allegedly being loved by the crew as a family (thus solving Crisis #1) despite this never actually being shown, demonstrated, or even fucking alluded to onscreen. If anything, it shows the exact opposite.

This last point is especially galling to me because of what is probably the most divisive issue in the fandom right now: killing off Izzy Hands after giving him seven episodes of character development.

The show begins with the Kraken crew clearly trying to use the skills they learned as part of Stede's crew to cope with their incredibly shitty situation and care for each other, which includes Izzy. Izzy, on his end, tries to protect the crew and speak up for them, which results in him being repeatedly hurt (both implicitly, as Ed at one point says "that's another toe" in response to Izzy advocating for the crew and we later see he's missing more than one toe already, and explicitly, as Ed shoots him in the fucking leg in front of the crew when he stands up for them).

This camaraderie is shown again and again and again. Frenchie, Jim, and Archie take care of Izzy while his leg is infected, at risk to their own lives. Izzy's misery over losing his leg is what unites the PTSD-ridden Kraken crew and the well-meaning-but-ignorant-of-PTSD marooned crew, who are initially at odds, to make him a new prosthetic leg. Izzy gives Lucius advice about forgiving Ed. Izzy is introduced to drag and opens up enough to sing at a crew party, and the whole crew is having fun together while Ed and Stede are in their cabin having sex for the first time. Izzy gives Stede pirate captain lessons and bonds with him when Ed leaves him. Izzy provokes the season's villain into focusing on him and then gives a big speech about how piracy is about belonging to something, giving the rest of the crew time to try to escape.

Recall that Season 1 had some pretty well-established universe rules, one of which was that it runs on Muppet physics/magical realism. People can jump off yardarms, hit the side on the way down, and be perfectly fine. People can get stabbed in the liver and it's totally okay because it's probably not that important, and even can stay pinned to a mast all night that way with only mild discomfort. Buttons can talk to birds and see long distances without a spyglass and put hexes on people. Good people can be hurt (Stede is stabbed repeatedly), bad people can die (the Badmintons, Geraldo), but no one we care about is ever killed.

This is repeated in Season 2: Ed is beaten into a coma with a cannonball and wakes up like Sleeping Beauty after a spirit journey, with no injuries to his face or body. Buttons turns into a seagull after spending an episode doing a magic ritual and is never seen again (because they couldn't keep paying Ewen Bremner due to the budget cuts). Jackie microdoses her husbands with poison to build up their immunity, so that she can later pull a Dread Pirate Westley and poison the British with shared drinks.

So: in the finale, the villain of the season is taken hostage by the pirates (for reasons? unclear how that fits in the plan), happens to have a gun on him (no one checked??), shoots Izzy on the right side and then leaves with no repercussions. The entire crew stands around silently doing nothing while Ed cries over Izzy and tells him that he's his only family.

And Izzy fucking Hands, the guy who just spent eight episodes bonding with and protecting everyone, uses his last words to reassure Ed that him becoming Blackbeard/the Kraken was Izzy's fault and that the crew is Ed's family and they all love him. No one else says anything to Izzy or tries to comfort him or help him in any way.

I repeat: in a show predicated on the idea that bullies and bigots die stupid deaths while queer people and POC are basically magic, a show that was praised for being kind to queer people by not making them worry about their faves suffering or dying, a show founded on the strength of the relationships between the characters, the guy who went through a season-long arc of learning to embrace his pirate found family and his own queerness is shot for stupid reasons on the side we're told isn't important and dies while everyone just stands there. His last words are about the whole crew loving Ed when the only person that the whole crew has loved all season is him.

Anyway, never mind all that, let's cut to Lucius and Pete getting married and Stede and Ed retiring!

Complicating all this is that people who liked Izzy (or even said anything insufficiently mean about Izzy) were harassed for months in between seasons with insults, slurs, and actual fucking death threats. Izzy's growth was kind of a vindication for liking him: it meant that, despite all the harassment, we were right to like him and care about him as a character. Even people who didn't like him initially started to like him during Season 2.

And then he dies, and now there's a bunch of people saying that Izzy fans are big whiny babies who can't handle fictional death, and actually his death was so meaningful and beautiful and the only logical end to his arc, and it can't be bad writing because people die in real life all the time, and also he admitted he fed Ed's darkness so actually he was a terrible person all along anyway and they were right to hate him (and his fans)!

So, yeah, there are a lot of reasons why it's so hated, and I'm probably only addressing the problems of the pro-Izzy people (from what I can tell, BlackBonnet shippers who don't like Izzy think Ed and Stede's relationship is fine and dandy, but I'm sure that there are other criticisms they have that I have not addressed). I'm not even addressing the issues with Jim and Oluwande's relationship this season (and whooo boy are there issues).

It wasn't a universally bad season. There were episodes I really loved and still do. But the finale was a train wreck, and because it was a train wreck, a lot of people are looking back at what happened before the wreck and realizing that, oh, the train lost its brakes and steering because of the budget cuts and the engineers kept throwing fuel in the engine to make it go faster, and huh, now that I think of it, that part earlier in the trip was really wobbly but I didn't pay much attention to it at the time because I was sure the engineers had everything covered.

[abbbbyyy]

Mozart's In The Dark

Reader(wife) X Bruce Wayne/Batman(husband)

Summery: You and Batman get hit with a gas that makes you temporality unable to move. You pass the time in fun little conversation.

Rating: Fluff

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I would love to kick you, but I can even feel my legs." You say, your voice strained and dry. A sadistic laugh echoes through the alley, the gas thick and suffocating in the air around you. Bruce's eyes, usually filled with fiery determination, are now glazed over, his body limp beside you.

You glance around, trying to get your bearings. The world around us is a blur of shadows and distorted sounds. The alley is narrow, lined with dumpsters and graffiti-covered walls. Above, the moon casts a feeble glow through the maze of buildings, providing just enough light to make out the outline of your attackers retreating into the distance.

"Let's do something to pass the time. Maybe it'll help keep our spirits up."

Bruce's eyebrows shoot up in surprise, but he doesn't argue. "Alright," he says, his voice a bit more clear than before.

So you start to sing, "Baby shark, doo doo doo doo doo doo…"

Bruce's eyes widen. "Really?"

"What? It's catchy." you laugh.

Bruce groans. "Catchy doesn't mean good."

"Fine," You concede, trying to think of something else. "How about this one?" You begin to sing the Batman theme song.

Bruce's eyes roll back into his head. "Oh, please, no. Not that."

"What?" you ask, feigning innocence. "It's your theme song, after all."

"And that's why it's the last thing I want to hear right now," Bruce says, his tone light despite the gravity of your situation.

"Fine," you say, pouting a little. "Then what do you want to hear?"

Bruce thinks for a moment, his breaths shallow and forced. "How about something from your playlist?"

"Alright," you say, "but only if it's not something too cheesy."

Bruce smiles faintly. "Cheesy? You mean like 'Batdance'?"

"Don't you dare," you threaten.

He chuckles weakly. "I was just testing you."

You lean your head back, the cold pavement providing little comfort. "What's on your playlist then, Bruce?"

He takes a deep, painful breath. "Well, some Mozart, some Led Zeppelin."

"Mozart?" You raise an eyebrow. "I didn't take you for a classical kind of guy."

"And you married me," he says with a smirk, despite the gravity of our situation. "You should have known I had layers."

"But Bruce, my beloved, my soulmate, you listen to Mozart?" you ask, your voice filled with a mix of surprise and amusement.

"What did you think I would listen to?" he asks, his voice a barely-there whisper as the gas starts to wear off.

"I don't know," you admit, "Maybe something more… brooding? Rock? Something emo."

Bruce lets out a small laugh, the sound surprisingly warm in the cold, desolate alley. "Emo, huh?"

"Well, you know, the whole 'Dark Knight' vibe," you tease, trying to keep the mood light.

Bruce shakes his head slightly, his movements still sluggish. "You think I sit in the batcave, brooding to emo music?"

"I didn't say that," you retort, "But it's not like I've ever seen you rocking out to Mozart while fighting crime."

"And you've seen me with emo music?" Bruce says, a small smile on his lips.

"Well, no, I haven't," you admit, "but I can imagine it."

Bruce's head turns slightly towards you, his eyes focusing with a bit more clarity. "Alright, I'll play along. What song would you pick for me?"

you think for a moment, a smirk playing on your lips. "Let's go with something Skillet, I'm thinking "Hero"."

Bruce's eyes widen. "Really?"

"What?" you ask, playing coy. "You don't think it fits?"

"Mozart," Bruce repeats, his voice gaining a bit more strength with each word, "has a certain… elegance to it. Plus, it helps me think."

Youlook at him, surprised by his revelation. "Elegance? In the heat of battle?"

"No," Bruce says firmly, "I'm not looking for a song for the heat of battle. I'm looking for something to keep me sane."

"Sane?" you repeat, the word feeling foreign in the chaos that is your life.

Bruce nods. "Sane."

"I married a complete nutjob," you murmur, the smirk on your face growing wider.

Bruce's chuckle is barely a breath, but it's there. "You say that like it's a surprise," he says.

You feel the tension in your body start to ease as the gas wears off. "Well, you do wear a cape and fight crime at night," you say, a hint of laughter in your voice.

"It's not a cape," he says, his tone mock-serious. "It's a cloak."

"Whatever you say, Mr. Wayne," you tease.

"How much longer do you think we have?" Bruce asks, his voice still strained but with a touch more urgency.

You struggle to sit up, pushing through the lingering heaviness in your limbs. "I'm not sure," you say, gritting your teeth against the pain. "But we need to move before they come back."

Bruce nods, his eyes narrowing in concentration as he tries to push himself up with his arms. "I think…I think I have an idea," he says, his voice still strained.

You watch as he fumbles with his utility belt, the leather straps and gadgets blurring before your eyes. "What are you doing?" you ask, your own voice still thick with the remnants of the gas.

"I have a shot of epinephrine," Bruce says through clenched teeth, his movements slow and deliberate. "It's for emergencies like this. It might help counteract the effects of the gas."

You watch as he fumbles with the cap, his trembling hand finally managing to remove it. The silver needle gleams in the moonlight, a beacon of hope in this otherwise grim situation.

"Here," he says, offering it to you with a forced smile. "You first."

You take the epinephrine from his hand, the cold metal sending a shiver down your spine. You know the drill; we've practiced this before. But never in a real situation. You inject yourself in the thigh, hissing as the liquid shoots into my system. For a moment, everything goes white, and then, as if a switch has been flipped, the world snaps back into focus.

Bruce watches you closely, his eyes searching for any signs of improvement. "How do you feel?" he asks, his voice stronger now.

"Better," you reply, taking a deep breath and sitting up with a grimace. "A lot better." The epinephrine is coursing through your veins, burning away the last remnants of the paralyzing gas. You hand the epinephrine back to him, and he takes it with a nod, injecting himself with the same determination.

You stand up slowly, your legs wobbly but cooperating. Bruce does the same, his cape fluttering slightly in the breeze. He looks at me, a question in his eyes. "Can you run?"

You nod, taking a tentative step. "Yeah, I think so."

Bruce stands with more ease than you expect, the epinephrine working its magic. "Good," he says, "because we need to get out of here before the cops show up. Too many questions we can't answer."

With a smirk, "Hey, start playing your Mozart for dramatic affect," you joke, trying to lighten the mood.

"Hon," he warns, his voice a bit stronger now.

You shrug, smiling. "What?"

Bruce rolls his eyes before turning serious. "We need to get back to the manor."

The sirens are closer now, the red and blue lights dancing through the narrow gaps between buildings. The gas has almost fully dissipated, and we can move more freely. Bruce takes your arm over his shoulder his grip firm but gentle, as you make your way out of the alley. Your movements are swift and calculated, years of experience guiding you through the shadows and away from the approaching authorities.

[zettaireido-emotion]

Camus character analysis: games VS anime

If you finished the Uta no Prince-sama anime and your opinion of this man is "wow, he's kinda terrible," I don't blame you. in fact I've seen a lot of people say this

In this post, I want to talk about his characterization in the games and give my two cents on what the anime was trying to do with him, especially in his single focus episode Saintly Territory (S3E6).

Disclaimer: I wrote this on a whim because I'm sick and stuck at home so if anyone reads this, sorry I might go all over the place

Spoilers for all of the games!

The "be my slave" thing

Starting with Anime Camus's most egregious crime: treating Haruka like a servant/slave (however you want to translate it)

Basically in his focus episode, Haruka is tasked with writing a song for Camus. She wants to learn more about him in order to write it, but Camus will only let her follow him if she acts as his servant. She accepts without complaining, Cecil is rightfully angry, Haruka continues anyway and the song gets completed.

Now, am I about to say that Game Camus would never do this? No because he literally does lmao.

The anime doesn't pull this "servant" plotline out of nowhere, here's the context in his route:

Haruka accidentally overhears Camus talking about a plot to assassinate Saotome on the phone. When he notices that she heard everything, he basically tells her that he has to kill her now. But if she served him, he'd be able to keep an eye on her, make sure she doesn't leak anything, so she could escape death.

Okay uh "work under me or DIE" isn't exactly better, nor is it a good start to a love story, but I'm not finished!!

(A side note: I have to add that the anime made him look like an even bigger asshole and borderline dumb when it came to the things he made her do. Like he expected her to know that snapping your fingers means you want coffee without prior explanation. bro

^This might have been for comedic effect but I promise he can be actually funny and endearing.)

What the anime couldn't cover

The Camus episode wraps up with Haruka pulling through and writing a song that makes Camus "sincere," he says it's cool at the very end and that's the episode. I think the problem is that we technically didn't see him being sincere or what that even means to him, besides when he was singing (banger song btw)

It's a shame because in a 20-minute episode you really can't show the game experience of slowly piecing together what this man's problem is.

First of all, in Debut and AS you'll be quick to notice that he always has homeland and duty on the mind, constantly reminding himself that he's in Shining Agency/Japan for a reason, and it's NOT to have fun or make friends

The truth is, he slowly starts to appreciate the banter with his colleagues, music, and working there in general.

But because of his initial mindset, he has to rationalize & justify every connection he forms, like "it's just for work" or worse: "actually it was ALL A LIE and I NEVER ENJOYED A SECOND OF THE TIME WE SPENT TOGETHER, I'm such a great actor haha"

He uses that to fool himself and to push the other person away so it doesn't happen again. This scene is probably the best example:

(I'll be using google lens because it's faster but I checked that the tls were okay)

He also does this in the Non-Fiction drama, which may or may not have actually happened, but I think it's still a pretty good reflection of what could happen in reality because he tells Ranmaru their bond was a lie, then mopes around in his guilt thinking about the good times and wondering why he's sad, and THEN later doubles down on the "it was a lie, I don't care about you" because he just can't let himself get attached to anything.

Basically, he's terrified at the thought of forming actual bonds because he genuinely thinks he's nothing if he stops being a cold weapon:

At one point he does admit he sucks (as a love interest)-

-which is pretty huge by utapri standards. I love these games, but the amount of times where a male lead does something icky, and everyone, including Haruka, acts like it's normal or like it's Haruka's fault is ehhh but I digress

Upbringing

Of course he's very proud of his homeland and status, but sometimes it's to the point of thinking he can't be anything other than his title. So why is he like this?

We got to hear about his childhood from Camus himself a few times, and it often ended with Haruka thinking "wait? that's kinda messed up?" and Camus insisting it's nothing/it's normal so yeah that's something...

His parents were in an unhappy arranged marriage, and his mother was forced to birth an heir which traumatized her so much that she can't see Camus without falling ill. Overall it's a pretty tragic situation since what happened to her was horrible, though not Camus's fault either. Even now she refuses to see him, and I wouldn't say that makes him sad because he never really met her, but simply knowing of her sacrifice probably adds a lot of pressure. As in, he only exists for this one purpose (inheriting his father's title and serving the country), so if he doesn't play his part correctly, it would have all been for nothing.

He was raised by his father not as a child or son but as the heir, always treated and judged as an adult (even during physical training apparently, make of that what you will)

When Haruka asks about childhood memories he has a very hard time finding something that doesn't have to do with his duties or the nation. And then admits he didn't truly have a "childhood" since he was never treated like a child

As for the queen, I think his love for her is sincere: she taught him a lot of things growing up, and according to him, she's also a victim trapped by her duties so he wants to ease the burden.

So hypothetically, if he found things or people that made him happy in Japan, he would feel obligated to lock them away because that happiness is incompatible with his life: he'll have to leave when his mission ends, he shouldn't be spending time on things that aren't "useful" as he doesn't have the free will to pursue them

In his mind he's completely tied down by the fact that he was born and raised for a single reason, and the fact that he does want to serve the queen.

(This is Saotome describing him btw)

Also it might sound ridiculous to bring his self-worth into question because of how pretentious he is, but I've counted a few situations where he seemed to have complete disregard for his own life, only worrying about Haruka and Cecil's safety in scenes when they were present. And he thinks wanting to be loved unconditionally is a childish thought he shouldn't have.

"Double Face" was a lie. There's like at least 10 layers

On the surface he does have two personas, his perfect polite butler act for the media, and his cold bitchy attitude off camera. But honestly, even when he's not acting as a butler, he's often putting up a front to hide any form of vulnerability (from himself as well)

His main struggle is finding who he is outside of what he's being told to do. Before, he never actually stopped to think about what he WANTS because it just never occurs to him, or if it does he ignores it.

That's why realizing that he has his own desires is essential to his character development, and him staying with Quartet Night (and Haruka in his routes) is so important. It's why Reiji feels the need to reach out and when he does, Camus either freezes up or tears up;

This all makes him the opposite of Ranmaru (being true to yourself and sincere), and similar to Ai (gradually learning to view the world in a less cold and logical way), but I kind of want to save that for another post lmao

He is especially hard on Cecil because Cecil says & does whatever he wants, and everything still works out for him, which is a way of life that Camus can't imagine for himself at all (despite maybe wanting it?)

That he can realize this and eventually admit out loud, despite all his pride, is also one of my favorite things about him

Season 2 does hint at something, so that's pretty cool!

Side note, I really love that his theme in the new Oracle series is "Change," the melting of ice.

So what was the anime supposed to do??

Of course there's no way to show all this in a single episode or even during the runtime of the anime, and I never expected them to because the story is very surface-level (that goes for all characters).

It's just unfortunate since the anime is the most accessible and well-known utapri media in the western fandom, and the character's main episode is bound to leave the biggest impression.

I understand the choice of being laser-focused on the servant plotline, it's supposed to be funny (?) and waters him down to a trope that's easy to understand at first glance (the step-on-me guy I guess)

Still, I can't help but compare it to Ranmaru's episode, who was also hard to work with in the games but was chill in S3E7 and got to pet cats. Anime onlys will never know how much Camus loves to dote on his dog smh.....

[hey-august]

Saw the cuteness aggression post you reblogged and would feel blessed if you ever wrote whump fic with Buggy because I would ALSO love to try and comfort a man who just staggered into the room bloody, beaten and bruised, clearly just thumbling over the threshold of “show no weakness” to “in so much pain he doesn’t even care anymore that he’s hiccuping and sobbing like a child while clinging to you” hurt comfort with heavy emphasis on the hurt? Yes pls

Anon, I'm so so sorry for how long it took me to get to this. I love me some angst and whump, and while I had ideas, the motivation to write was not working with me.

I don't want to keep holding onto this and leave you hanging for even longer, so I wrote out my idea in bullet point format.

I hope this still hits the spot!

WC: ~550 Warnings: buggy x gn!reader, mentions of blood and burn wounds

You and Buggy have an unspoken thing. A mutual pining. There's respect and some affection. A closeness, but still distance and a barrier that neither of you acknowledge.

You're the ship's doctor and the crew was in a rough fight. Lots of injuries, ranging from minor scuffs, to teeth knocked out, stitches, broken noses and broken bones, blood and tears - it's a lot in a short period of time.

You're doing what you can, and those who are less injured are helping where they can.

Once you get through those involved, the captain is the last one left needing your attention.

Maybe he's been sitting nearby the whole time, waving away anyone coming to triage or check on him, snapping that he's fine. Get the hell away from him.

But when the room empties, Buggy crumbles. It starts small, bit by bit as you assess him.

His busted lip is split and bleeding, the color mixing with his smeared lipstick. His right eye is swelling. His beautiful hair is singed. The affected tips are stuck in terrified curls from trying to run from the heat. The smell is clinging everywhere.

But the worst are the burns. You're not sure what happened - some of the other crewmembers had burns and scorch marks, but not like this.

Your captain has some rough wounds on his arms and torso, where the heat ate away at the fabric before feeding on his skin and flesh.

He's wet and sticky. Swaths of skin are weeping. Buggy's feeling exposed, tender, and hurt. Pain is radiating out while regret and fear are falling inwards.

All it takes is one soft comment from you. "You must be in so much pain." You were talking to yourself, but it's the acknowledgement that Buggy must have needed.

The eyes that had been avoiding yours, stopped holding back tears. His clenched jaw and tight lips quiver. He nods.

You can't fathom how much it hurts to move, but Buggy has his arms wrapped tightly around your midsection. His hands are clutching your clothes, pulling them taut. It's like he's a cracked vessel, losing liquid and life, but maybe you can keep him together. Maybe you could fix him. And if not, he wouldn't be alone as he breaks.

Hurting more is often part of getting better. You know this, and you let it happen.

You let Buggy cry against you. You let his tears, snot, spittle, and worries seep into your clothes. You hold the back of his head and put a hand on his back, and rub. You let your own stinging tears fall.

Noises get caught in his throat and Buggy fixes his hold, as if he's trying to wrap himself around you even more. As if he's trying to squeeze every drop of comfort and care from you.

His hands are detached, fingers stretched and probably barely connected, all so he can hold more of you. Even his feet are shuffling, seeking contact against yours. His knees knocking against your legs.

Buggy continues until he's hiccupping and coughing. Until he has a headache and his eyes are bleary.

You should have stopped him sooner. Some of the oozing wounds started to crust and are clinging to the fabric of your clothes.

Buggy whines and grunts as he literally peels himself away.

You still need to clean and dress the wounds, so another round of pain. One could argue that you should have gone ahead and done that right away, but no.

Despite the visible injuries, there's invisible damage that needed to be soothed.

You can almost see Buggy picking up his broken pieces and putting them back together. Recreating a wall, a mask, a barrier.

You know what's on the other side, though. And you will be there whenever he needs you.

[darksideofthecoffeebean]

I love this so much. He's just as handsome as Katrine. ❤️ I like to imagine that they shared a very long and happy life after the war. I guess it took some time for Chuck/Amal to get accustumed to life in France but he's an open-minded guy and he trusts Katrine blindly.

Oh, this gives me so many ideas... Based on the actors' ages, Katrine and Chuck would've both been born around 1900. That means they both lived through not only one but two world wars.

I think it made especially Katrine grow up fast. Her father and fiancé (Justin) died on a mission in the last days of WW1 while she had to look after her mother and early teenage sister, Phoebe.

I imagine this experience of hardship made Katrine decide to live her life to the fullest, which is why she moved to Paris in the 1920ies and threw herself into the party scene. She tried to make a living as a bar singer but - while talented in many areas - had to realise that singing wasn't among them (just watch Kate Mulgrew as a country singer in "Dallas". 😄). It's still a sore spot for Katrine which is why she's a tad too salty with Mademoiselle DeNeuf.

Interwar-Paris is also the time and place where Katrine becomes politicised. She meets and befriends Tuvok (a highly educated man from one of the French colonies in Africa), who introduces her to the political circles that will later form the Resistance. It's also where she meets Mark, who becomes her second fiancé.

When Nazi Germany takes over Paris in 1940, Katrine and Tuvok flee to St. Claire in the south of France, where they open the 'Coeur de Lion' to run their Resistance cell. Mark joins the French Army and is soon lost. When Katrine meets Chuck, Mark has been missing for over four years and she has to assume that he's dead. When Mark returns, Chuck and Katrine were just married and run the 'Coeur de Lion' together. After an emotional reunion, everyone's just happy that they're all still alive and remain friends. Mark moves to Québec to start a new life.

---

Ah, I think that's enough for now. 😄 I'd like to have Chuck a background as a Native American but I don't know enough about how that might play into the WW2 scenario and how he grew up.

There are also many questions still open: Do Katrine and Chakotay have a child? What do they do in the 1950ies, 60s, 70s and 80s?

I'm pretty convinced they'd be a part of the civil rights movement in the 60s/70s. How do they eventually die?

AU white tux killing game chakotay

Amal Miller, the show runner of Le Coeur de Lion, as well as leader of the underground French resistance

[gingermintpepper]

Day 5: Orpheus

Interpretation notes and trivia under the cut!

Orfeu meu amor <333 Honestly this could be my longest ever set of notes or the shortest because unlike literally any of the other Apollonian figures in this, I have never once had to waver from what I wanted with Orpheus and that's an Orpheus without Eurydice. I know that sounds kind of strange, Orpheus and Eurydice have always been completely synonymous with each other but like, Orpheus is kind of completely batshit as a concept and I'm tired of pretending the most interesting thing about him is his love life?? His love life is cool, don't get me wrong, but we, collectively, as a group of people don't pay nearly enough attention to the fact that Orpheus was singer and musician so gifted that he made trees and rocks bow to him and he could stir even the gods to grieve from his songs. This is the guy who's song was so beautiful that not only did he outsing the Sirens, they also killed themselves upon hearing his song?? This is the man that was pulled apart but his head just?? Kept on singing??? So the Muses just???? Added his perpetually singing decapitated head to their choir??? There are depictions of Apollo using said decapitated head to help him teach people???? And we're gonna focus on him trying to get his dead wife back?????? Really?? Miss me with that nonsense, Orpheus is the witchest witch to ever witch and if no one else is gonna make him the disgustingly powerful bard he was in myth then I guess I'll have to do it myself. His femme appearance is mostly inspired by the highly ornamental raiment of kithara players and he consistently has some of the fanciest clothes of the cast apocalyptic hellscape be damned.

Some assorted trivia:

Son of Apollo and Calliope - was accidentally conceived during the period when Artemis had forbid Apollo from fraternising with mortal creatures in penance for him orchestrating Orion's death and so Calliope and the other Muses hid him away in the court of King Oeagrus. Didn't know Apollo was actually his father until quite a bit later.

Not a demigod as that would imply he's half human. Orpheus isn't exactly mortal either but he certainly cannot be harmed by most normal methods. There's no formal name for something half god, half muse and not deathless so Orpheus prefers to identify as the Son of a Muse rather identifying strongly as something strictly divine.

Older than Heracles! One of Apollo's oldest children still kicking about, actually, but he's treated like the youngest due to how fragile he'd been after Eurydice's death. Is generally better now than he used to be, but still tends to have depressive episodes every now and again.

Horrifyingly powerful. Orpheus' words are so potent that he does his best to not speak at all for fear of influencing the people around him accidentally. Has the uncanny ability to transmit his own feelings through his songs which can be both fantastic and awful. The Twelve had Apollo put a seal on his tongue when he was grieving so his song would stop completely disrupting the world. The seal's since been removed as Orpheus has had a lot of help working through his feelings. Now he paints whenever he thinks about Eurydice which is much more productive for everyone involved.

Argonaut, storied traveller, speaker of many languages, healer, teacher and storyteller. Teaches occasionally at the Parnassus Institute for Gifted Children and tends to be a favoured teacher whenever he drops by. Is responsible for a lot of very important people knowing some form signed or gestured language.

Has no set 'home' and wanders from temple to temple, sanctuary to sanctuary. His worldly belongings like his clothes and old paintings are currently with Asclepius and his family. Apollo has some of his stuff as well, but they're mostly special instruments like the holy lyre he used on his journey on the Argo.

Never keeps any money on him and is usually fed and clothed by the townspeople wherever he goes. Hasn't had to actually pay for something in decades. Has absolutely no concept of money because he'd forgotten it's a thing people need day to day.

Had a brief fling with Heracles while he was still mortal and the two remain on good terms even now. Heracles tends to visit him every now and again for a stint in some springs and good music.

Favourite colour is maple orange, favourite food is roasted pheasant with rosemary and thyme. Allergic to specifically pale yellow mead but is fine with raw honey and honeycomb. Aristaeus has been trying to figure out what causes his reactions for years now.

[vaggieslefteye]

YOU DIDN'T KNOW ↳ from Hazbin Hotel Season One (2024): 1x06 - "Welcome to Heaven"

[oozeandgoo-art]

oh right, i drew this the other day

[discordiansamba]

right. where does he even start?

hi jin. everything you know about me is a lie. i wasn't lying to you though, because i believed it too. really concise and to the point. sounds absolutely terrible. he might as well just start with 'hello, prince zuko here' if he's trying to shove his foot into his mouth.

"do you remember those rumors," lee asks, "-about uh. the dai li brainwashing people?"

jin blinks. yeah, she's heard them. they'd even discussed them before. they were just fire nation propaganda right? the dai li wouldn't do that. they're supposed to protect us. lee wrings his hands and tells her they're all true, actually. the dai li really did brainwash people. you know how people keep telling you that I don't have an uncle? that I wasn't a refugee?

yeah, uh. the thing is. i was also brainwashed.

jin just stares at him like she's waiting for the punchline. it's only when she realizes he's serious that she takes his hand and asks what he means. she doesn't understand. why would the dai li make him believe he had a father, or that he was born and raised in ba sing se? she can't imagine mushi causing trouble.

"because I'm not- my name isn't lee," he tells her, "-well, I mean it is. sort of. but it's also not. it's really complicated."

jin asks him to explain.

lee takes in and lets out a deep breath. he swears he feels the flames of the lanterns flicker around them. it's oddly calming. he slowly begins to explain. he tells her that the dai li altered his mind and made him believe he'd always lived here. that his name was lee, and that his father was a member of the dai li. that his mother was dead, and his burn was from a house fire. he was... someone else before, but they remade him into a simple tea server- stripping him of his original personality in the process.

being lee is all he knows.

jin just stares at him. her grip on his hand has grown so tight that her knuckles are white. she asks him if he's not lee, then who is he?

"i mean, i kind of am lee," he admits, "-i'm not uh. i'm still brainwashed. it's not as bad as it sounds? i'm- i'm happy like this, and... i don't think i was before. i could go back to the person i was before, but i'm not sure if i want to."

she asks him again who he used to be.

he sighs. he tells her it's going to sound made up. that she's going to be angry with him. he promises her that he's never lied to her. he'd thought his whole life here as lee the tea server was real- and that he really does love her. he wasn't made to fall in love with her or anything. he just did.

"lee," she asks him again, "-who were you?"

"...zuko," he tells her, "-prince zuko."

she releases his hand and just stares at him, her eyes wide. the fire nation prince? the banished one? lee nods. he's still trying to wrap his head around it. jin just stares at him. you helped conquer ba sing se. lee hangs his head. yeah. he did. he doesn't remember any of it, but he did. he says he thinks prince zuko thought it would bring him his honor back or something.

all it got him was being backstabbed by his sister.

that's why they ended up serving princess azula, he says. because avatar aang and his friends found him and realized who he was, even when he couldn't. katara could heal him. make him into the person he once was, but father and princess azula didn't want that. they wanted him to stay as lee for the rest of his life.

"if you want to break up with me," lee says, "-i wouldn't blame you."

jin tells him she needs some time to think this over.

lee doesn't blame her.

it's an odd feeling, telling his nephew about himself.

but it is clear that the young man sitting across from iroh is not his nephew- as much as he might have zuko's face and body. even with the knowledge of his true self, he still treats him as a distant stranger- one that he must be deeply respectful of, but still a stranger. katara has kept him abreast of the situation, though he suspects there is something the young waterbender has been keeping to herself.

looking at lee, he suspects he can sense what it is.

he tells lee of zuko's agni kai.

he tells him what lead to it. lee looks surprised at zuko's outrage at the planned sacrifice of young soldiers. he is not sure he can blame him- he can only imagine what zuko's reputation is in the earth kingdom. to them he was only a banished prince, disloyal to his father and punished for it without knowing the exact reason why. he had chased the avatar with the intent of turning him over to his father, and then had helped conquer ba sing se.

iroh holds nothing back.

he tells lee of zuko. of how he let himself be redefined by his anger after the agni kai. but he also tells him that he helped the avatar escape pohuai stronghold, even if his reasons for doing so were less than pure. he tells them of their life as refugees. he tells them of zuko's choice under lake laogai, when he freed appa.

he tells him of how he chose to ally with his sister during the coup.

lee listens to him quietly- but it is like he is being told a story about another person. someone he's never met. when iroh is finished, lee exhales, as if he's been holding his breath all this time. it has been some time since iroh started speaking, but there is still steam rising from lee's cup.

"he wasn't happy," lee says, "-was he?"

"no," iroh admits, "-not for a long time. not since his mother disappeared."

lee cannot meet his eyes. he opens his mouth and shuts it, like there is something he wishes to say, but cannot manage. iroh sighs, and gives him his word as fire lord that whatever he wishes to say to him, he can say it without consequence. lee takes in a deep breath, and slowly lets it out.

"i don't know," he admits, "-if I want to go back."

and there it is, out in the open.

it would not be the first child iroh has lost to ba sing se. this is perhaps a kinder way to lose one. zuko would not be himself, but he could be happy there. they will have to deal with lan-wei and azula, but if that is the path he wishes to choose... then iroh will support it. he asks him only to think about it before he makes his choice.

deep down, he has wondered if a distant promise of happiness was what finally made zuko surrender.

"lady mai tells me this is the royal family's personal villa," lee says after a moment, "-but I don't know this place. I've never been here before, but there are portraits all over the place of someone who looks just like me. i can't get comfortable here."

"...I think I need to go home. to ba sing se."

"and if you go," iroh asks, "-will you be able to make up your mind?"

lee nods. iroh heaves a sigh. in truth, he does not want to let him go. but his nephew must make his own decisions. he is eighteen now. nearly an adult. the last time iroh tried to force him into seeing things his way, it did not end as he'd hoped. not for himself- nor for zuko.

"then go," iroh says, "-one way or another, you will find the answers you seek there."

[thelaurenshippen]

literally where is my next to normal movie. it's been fifteen years. who is keeping this from me.

[songstep4002]

The strange sapphic phenomenon where All Roads Lead to Hozier (for me at least):

Daisira is one of my favorite ships from the Magnus Archives. I love them so much, they're my tragic morally dubious scary lesbians and I go berserk for their moments. And my favorite animatic that's just for them? A Hozier song.

Katie McGrath was my bi awakening as Morgana in Merlin and over the course of my forays into Tumblr I have been transforming into one of the feral fans who wants to watch everything she's in. So when I find out she's in a music video and go watch it? A Hozier song.

Annapantsu is the YouTube cover artist that made me realize why YouTube cover artists are a thing. Her cover of House of Asmodeus made me gay panic so hard I forgot what gay panic was called. Occasionally she'll release a cover that elicits a similar response and it'll live rent free in my brain for weeks. The most recent of these? A Hozier song.

I'm not a hardcore Hozier fan, but if this trend keeps up, it likely won't be long.

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: March 27

"Long Time Gone" by The Chicks

[to-thelakes]

IT JUST OCCURED TO ME SPOTIFY WRAPPED SEASON IS NEARLY UPON US

[draco-renn]

Only now do I realize how deeply draining it is to interact with someone with low self-esteem... Like I get it, I've been there, but good god. How do you have such low self-esteem that you cycle back around to being the most obnoxiously self-absorbed person on the planet.