#but ive been playing Relics again to get a feel for the characters

[iggydabirdkid]

Heyo!  This is the second of the 6 drawings I have planned for Pride Month! 

The Relics Trilogy is one I thoroughly enjoyed, and the ending legitimately made me cry. It was perfect and I loved it so much. So this is a little thing I drew and wrote for my Olivia Spillane and Esme Fairfield. +++++

We Have the Time

“Esme? Sweetheart? Where are you?”

You stand at the bottom of the stairwell as you shout, hands cupped around your mouth and your voice echoing back at you from the emptiness of the lofty entrance hall. Silence is all that greats you and you sigh, your foot beginning a nervous tap the sound dulled somewhat by the plush red carpet on which you stand. You remove your fob watch from the pocket of your faded waistcoat to check the time which only results in your free hand starting a restless drumming against your thigh.

“Esme! We’re going to be late!” You shout again, slipping the watch back into its resting place as the familiar sound of loud yet fond laughter spills into the lobby from above.

“Late for what Darling?” comes the amused reply soon after, accompanied by the sound of footsteps making their way down the winding staircase, “We’re in no hurry!” Esme’s laugh tickles your ears as she finally comes into view, standing atop the landing in a dress of green and yellow backlit by the rare occurrence of early afternoon sun. As she starts her way down the last lot of stairs towards you you find yourself enraptured by her visage, “I know we’re both used to rushing around…” she starts as her foot leaves the last step and the sun abandons her form, “And normally Darling you know I would be all for it.” She wears an easy smile as she strides over, stopping just before you and reaching to cup your face with her soft hands, “But right now, I’d just like to enjoy the day with you. We have the time.” She smiles and the fingers that had been pitter-pattering against your leg stop their motions the same time as your foot rests perfectly still against the carpet.

You huff out a small laugh before leaning forwards, Esme meeting you halfway in a brief yet sweet kiss, “I’m sorry. I guess it’s still hard for me to relax after everything.”

“You and me both.” The smile she gives you this time doesn’t quite reach her eyes and what years ago had started off as a merely a seed of guilt, before growing to a small sapling as it sent out roots and anchored itself into the center of your chest, sprouts even further. Unaware of your thoughts you watch as Esme steps back a few paces and looks you up and down, “Really?” she rolls her eyes yet still they twinkle, “You’re wearing your expedition gear to a picnic?” Though she teases you still link arms as you head towards the door.

“Isn’t that the same dress you wore to one of Rémy’s more tame parties?” You feel the corners of your lips quirk upwards as you fail to hide the grin that finds its home on your face. You continue speaking as you pull the creaking wooden door open and you both step into the pleasantly warm air of the day, “I’m surprised that you managed to get that stain out.”

“Oh quiet you!” she hushes as you pull the door shut, lock it up, and place the brass key safety into the pocket of your forest green pants. You laugh and the sound of crunching gravel fills the air as you walk across to your bright red Morris Eight, the top down and the picnic basket visible on the back seat. As you approach the vehicle you pull slightly ahead of Esme and open the passenger door, slipping your arm from hers as you mock bow.

“My lady,” you drawl in a ridiculous attempt at a British accent, “Your buggy awaits.” You receive a light slap on the shoulder and you straighten back up.

“Quit it!” Esme’s fixes you with a glare and you laugh, leaning towards her to place a kiss on her cheek.

“You know you love me,” you smile as she shakes her head with a sigh, squeezing your arm before stepping into the car. You shut the door, round to the driver’s side, and get in before turning in your seat you lean over into the back to open up the hinged lid of the wicker basket.

“Honey?” Esme’s voice reaches your ears as you roll up your sleeves to the crook of your elbows and begin checking through the contents of the basket.

“I just want to make sure that everything’s here,” you reply without turning to face her, “We don’t get a lot of days like this and I just want to make sure everything is perfect.” As you feel a hand gently place itself upon your shoulder you stiffen.

“Honey…” you stop your rummaging, “It doesn’t have to be perfect.” Esme squeezes your shoulder lightly but doesn’t let go, instead slowly but insistently she begins to pull you back up. You reluctantly allow her to do so, making sure the lid of the basket is closed and latched before turning back around completely.

“I…” you struggle to find the words as lay your arm across the back of your seat and your fingers begin to drum against the washed-out black leather.

“Olivia, it’ll be fine.” She smiles at you and the world seems brighter for it, “And if something is missing, though knowing you I doubt it will be-“ A hand rests against your restless fingers to stop the tapping you didn’t realize you were still doing, “We’ll adjust.” As her soft fingers curl around your own and squeeze you take a deep breath and sigh.

“Thank you Esme. You always know the right things to say.” You spare her a warm smile before pulling your arm away and righting yourself in your seat. You place the key in the ignition, turn it and hearing the comforting purr of your trusty cars engine puts you at ease. As you pull away from your home and begin to accelerate, Esme shouts to be heard above the wind,

“How about we take the scenic route!” You glance at her and she grins, “We have the time!”

-------

“This was a great idea Olivia,” Esme pats your knee with her free hand before taking a bite of her sandwich. You watch as she closes her eyes, a smile curving her lips as she turns her face into the sun to soak up its warmth.

All you do is watch her.  

All you can do is watch her.

She looks nothing short of an Angel, and you feel all the more blessed to be allowed to bask in her radiance. You don’t realize you’re drumming your fingers on your thigh until Esme is looking at you with a frown, her eyes momentarily flicking down to your hand. You curl your fingers into your palm and give her what you hope is a convincing smile but you’re a shit liar and she knows your tells by now.

“Something’s bothering you. And don’t try and deny it.” She shakes her half-eaten sandwich at you and you snort a brief laugh as some of the fillings drop out.

“Just thinking about how lucky I am to have you.”

“That’s all well and good-“ You knew she’d be able to see through your feeble attempt at diverting her question, “- but you’ve been restless since you first woke up this morning.”

You sigh, “You’re right. I’m sorry. I just want this to be a nice day and I keep overthinking, and I know you said you don’t care about it being perfect but I want to make it perfect for you, and I know I’ve been rushing but weather like this hardly ever lasts long and-“ your rambling is stopped short as you watch Esme throw her sandwich to the side and tackle you to the ground. A squeak of surprise leaves your mouth as your back hits the scratchy fibers of the blanket beneath you.

“Olivia Spillane,” Esme mumbles as one of her arms flops over your waist. You smile and maneuver an arm beneath her, allowing her the rest her head upon your breast, “You think far too much.” You begin stroking your fingers through her golden hair, your other arm moving to grasp her upper arm and you pull her closer to you, “You always think so much. It’s what makes you you.” You hum in agreement, “But the war is over. We’re married. We have a stunning house and fantastic friends and you can afford to let your mind rest.”

“I just…”

“Shhhh,” Esme shushes you and you let out a soft laugh. She squeezes your waist and you lay your hand flat against her hair, drawing her just that bit closer to you as you rest a cheek atop her head and close your eyes against the glare of the sun overhead, “No thinking. No talking. We can just lay here, take in the sun, and relax.” You smile at her words, “We have the time.”

[saviourkingslut]

2&17 for the ask game pls!!!

02. strongest unit you had? hmm well i played azure moon on easy mode and bc i was a noob back then i didn't know how to optimize my units, and the other routes i played on hard afterwards. so like, while i now know dimitri has access to batallion vantage and wrath to become a complete monster, ive never actually used him with that combo. generally though, across the three other routes, felix has been my strongest unit. that's partly because he and sylvain get Extreme Favouritism from me so almost every stat booster i have goes to them, as do the best weapons, but felix with sword avo +20 (through having him compete in the white heron cup), his overall great strength growth and good spd growth and his access to vantage makes an absolute powerhouse. ive had so many maps where he decimates a demonic beast's or titan's last hp bar. plus his crest activates like, every turn you use him. i usually equip him with a rapier and the crit ring and leave the shield behind to boost avo, but the fact that he has access to the relic too is just the cherry on top tbh

17. character you relate to? it's a bit of a hard question bc pretty much everyone in this game has insane trauma and i don't really (lmao). for example, i relate to dimitri's strong sense of justice and duty and that's partly why i like him because we're very much alike in that sense, but there's plenty about him that resonates with me but that i don't necessarily relate to. i can also relate to annette's perfectionism and a work ethic that isn't very healthy because you feel a need to prove yourself over and over again, but im unfortunately also very good at slacking off when i shouldn't (bc of the perfectionism), which she isn't.

[captainadwen]

my investment in genshin this time around has been much much shorter lived than expected

this is just a sleep-deprived 5 am rant bc i cannot sleep

i mean, part of it might be spoilers but also the lack of building up to plot that I missed (since my friend played some of the story while using my account as an alt). the issue is that i dont care enough about inazuma’s plot to look it up and see what happened. like ive met ei. i did her second quest. i know enough about raiden shogun to guess. i dont give a single fuck about kujo sara so watching her short-lived fallout from ideology is frankly unappealing. kokomi i liked only bc of a fancomic and the in-game version is much more disappointing. i still forget gorou exists. doing kazuha’s quest is frankly wasting the time i spend alive. i think there’s other characters in inazuma but i keep forgetting who they are so it’s like, whatever

why are itto and shinobu the only two characters from inazuma i actually like???

it is just impossible for me to be invested in inazuma story, and the same issue is happening in sumeru. sumeru the problem is a mix of spoilers but also that i am SO DONE with the traveler having three personality traits

1. i single-handedly saved countries. pay my allies no mind. isn’t it great i owned the jade chamber and that the anemo god is still awol and whatever the fuck went down in inazuma?

2. busybody

3. omg, sUCH a HERo

i really hate it!!!

every time i think im getting invested the focus shifts from characters and their interactions (i thought!!! little sick rich lady and body guard pyro lady and dancer hydro lady had a nice thing going on!!!) back to the traveler and their bullshit quest to go see the dendro archon (for what???? honestly if the writers REALLY cared about the story the motivation would stop being flimsy-ass lets travel teyvat uhuhuh and more ‘that dainsleif fellow is my closest link to finding my awol sibling and if i cannot find my sibling or the god that yeeted us here then by GOLLY i will track dainsleif and other khaen’riah survivors/relics across teyvat until i find one of them again)

(which like!!! could work really well for inazuma and sumeru bc 1. vision stopping might be sus enough for traveler to suspect abyss involvement. but also they got hit really bad by the cataclysm and 2. i havent done the quest yet but there’s a huge-ass ruin guard??? just lying around??? also the irminsul tree links whatnot)

MY POINT IS

i really hate that there’s no motivation to travel around and i hate the boastful traveler and i hate paimon’s screechy voice (i went back to see clips of mond and her voice is SO MUCH LESS SCREECHY) and i really, really fucking despise the grinding

why does every new character need a specific artifact. why do we have to grind so much. if i want to use any of my cast of characters i have to grind the fuck out of them first or they die in three seconds or do nothing. heaven forbid your character scale off anything but attack or hp with how rare things like energy recharge are. like

i thought it was just that i disliked fighting games. im kinda bad at them. and i dont like genshin fighting. i keep wanting to play a ton of rpgs (assasin’s creed, mass effect), but i get tired thinking about fighting. but then i realized, im like 40+ runs in on hades and still going strong. and that game is pure combat.

i just hate games where the combat feels meaningless

at least in hades i know each run brings me slowly closer to escaping the underworld. in genshin after grinding for a full hour (a bit longer than a long slow run in hades) i’ll be lucky if i got anything of use. maybe if you just fight bosses for ascension materials. otherwise get fucked

it just exhausts me and not even puzzles or exploration can make me not feel tired at the idea of playing (And god, i hate the aranara quest run around collecting seeds things.... it could be worse but it could also just be lile. a puzzle instead of dash dash dash con)

anyway i think imma take another break, probably shorter since genshin is what i play when i am bored simply bc its there and easy and i can quit after 5 mins with zero progress lost. a realization brough to you by the realization i was only logging in to get primos for nahida, who i have not met and whom spoilers did not endear me to (also she’s a kid character and except for klee i universally am extremely indifferent to them), whom i was told is “ultra good” for fighting and spiral. and who i’d still have to build up. on the off chance i win 50/50

yeah, no

[lordgheleon]

(slight spoilers for the ESO high isle global reveal if you havent watched it yet and want to see stuff for yourself!!) didnt write up the reaction post i initially planned re:the High Isle reveal stream bc i havent felt well but the way i yelled when i saw Captain Kaleen as the questgiver in the postshow preview of the Coral Aerie dungeon!!

i was hoping so much that we'd get to see Kaleen again and i do feel a bit of disappointment that so far it seems like we're only reconnecting with her for the purpose of rescuing Jakarn (and i love that Jakarn's coming back i just wish they'd give Kaleen her own thing) im reeeeeally hoping we still get to see her play a larger role in June or even later in the year, imo they didn't accentuate her character growth enough in base game - the last time the player is directed to specifically talk to her is in Rivenspire via the quest you pick up from Nicolene in Shornhelm's inn, and i feel like its a safe assumption that some people who don't know where she ends up in Sentinel dont know she has dialogue there where she expresses regret over how she wanted to handle the Betnikh relic + how she ended things w/Lambur, and it's always just bugged me that that we never get to actually see her reach that conclusion? like the modicum of character growth she gets is both fast-tracked and sidelined, and considering that she literally dives into the ocean to pluck your Vestige from the sea before she even knows you + is the first Covenant character you really get to meet, ive been rly frustrated that they havent brought her back at all - like Lerisa got her quest in the Kvatch/Gold Coast and Jakarn got his in Rimmen/N.Elsweyr + is returning again this year. i rly thought we were gonna have to wait for a Redguard-centric dlc to even see her mentioned since she sails for King Fahara'jad now but theyve been doing her dirty from a writing perspective for years and im just glad theyre acknowledging her at all.

[king-there0f]

20 (Does your character have a comfort item?) for everyone? sorry I couldn't choose just one character for this

Oohh gosh, I’ve never actually thought about this! So thank you! I don’t usually think of my characters as having specific singular items that being them comfort, but rather a kind of thing that reminds them of a person/place/time they felt safe.

Guild Wars

Matthias - a home cooked meal. He grew up with family meals so eating a hearty meal made with care amongst friends or family brings him great comfort.

Sarah - roses remind her of Neirium. It was a flower they often exchanged during the early days of their relationship. I think she also finds the smell of tobacco comforting, it reminds her of people who used to take care of her.

Marjah - the sound and smell of rain. Especially in the summer. Perhaps it was raining when he first awoke from the Pale Tree, on a warm morning just as spring was turning into summer. Rain makes him feel a bit nostalgic for simpler times.

Astereaux - a telescope that was a gift from a mentor. It reminds him of of spending time with a person who cared about him and his potential. Even when he travels without it, just looking at the stars brings him a lot of comfort and joy.

Thalliah - probably takes a very classic comfort route and when she finds herself in need of comforting, seeks out the coziest spot in her home and makes herself a soft little blanket nest. She takes a lot of baths with flowers and herbs to relax after a stressful or difficult day at work and would probably enjoy it with candles, tea, and snacks before going to bed early.

Vulcca - treasures handwritten letters from friends he no longer has contact with, or who have passed away. He’s an older ex-warband charr who, his older years is getting involved in political activism. Mainly surrounding charr and human relations. But as an older fellow, he is at that age where you begin to lose friends and acquaintances to time, so he really values these little relics of past relationships and friendships.

(Other characters I just dont have thought out well enough)

Dnd

Jade - still keeps his old flute around even though he can no longer play it (he was cursed by an ex to never play music again) thought, it’s hard to tell if it brings him comfort, or serves to stress and enrage him.

Fish - her fishing rod is her most prized possession and you be no idea how bummed I am that Hero Forge doesn’t have a fishing rod item for me to give her. She also collects rocks so I’m sure she’s got all kinds of other little nick-nacks she collects that have a lot of sentimental meaning to her.

Barm - he’s that parent who has boxes stored away of every drawing or note his kid has given to him because he can’t bear to throw them away. He probably keeps whatever she has made for him most recently folded up in his pocket so he can look at it whenever he needs to smile.

Other

Luke (RD2Online)- please understand how much this man loves his horse. He really is just a bonafide horse girl in the body of a scrawny southern criminal moonshiner. He stole her from a rival moonshine operation and whenever feels sad he can just look into her beautiful horse eyes and feel righted again.

Ech0 (cyberpunk red) - old retro games. He has a super rare first edition copy of some retro game (still haven’t decided what) plays it rarely, so as not to wear out the cartridge, but its the game he turns to when he has a rough day or a job didn’t pan out as planned

(Ive been thinking a lot lately about comfort games cuz I was thinkin about how ACNL really is my absolute anti-anxiety game. Like I boot that thing up and that music hits me and I’m just like woah…im gonna go fishing for like, three hours on Kappn’s island and then I’m gonna feel right as rain. I love ACNH to death but its way more of a “Project” game, where I have goals I want to accomplish. ACNL is nuthin but relaxin all the way down…)

[pestopascal]

sorry if it's not too mcuh to ask but are you able to share the endings? ive seen a lot of mixed reviews in regards to them and player choices and i wanted to hear your opinion

uhhh pfft okay spoilers below... but there are like “five″ endings, each with variations and reflections on choices that you go through

devil ending (arasaka)

so assuming you have done nothing game wise (no side missions, no friendships), this is the most basic ending you will get besides one other. this has several differences based on whether you saved takemura or not (yes, you can save him in search and destroy, and he doesn’t like an outcome of this ending if you save him. quite frankly, it’s hilarious).

this ending basically ends the arasaka story of the game, which was the heist section, as well as takemura’s general story direction. you realise along the way that yorinobu wasn’t just the antagonist but an antihero in hating his father’s stance on separating the rich and poor further, as well as attaining immortality via the relic. he wanted to give it to everyone. saburo had uploaded his soul to mikoshi (think along the lines of the stacks in altered carbon), knowing that yorinobu was going to make an attempt. turns out hanako knew all this. there is more backstory with hanako’s connection to alt explained. saburo’s relic is installed in yorinobu’s body.

- variation 1: goro died, hellman takes you to the facility

after the choice, hellman will be the one to escort v to arasaka, having survived conveniently. after some other missions involve a hostile takeover of arasaka, hanako fulfills her promise of removing johnny, but in the process v’s mind is practically destroyed beyond saving. there is a sequence of testing, with the scientists and lots of psychological implications. hellman will arrive to give the choice of whether to upload v’s mind to mikoshi in an attempt to save them in some years time (because, as it turns out, there are stipulations in that cloning is not near the level of science it needs to be, saburo and yorinobu obviously had close enough genetic material it made transfer easier. also johnny’s relic has apparently ‘changed’ v’s dna enough (which is questioned and evaded). that and it is arasaka. they could just be lying, and v knows this). so v can sign a contract to be uploaded to mikoshi, or can return to earth with 6 months to potentially live, although is speculated to have less time than that.

the credits roll with dialogue from those you may have befriended in some capacity discussing either the fact you have signed on to arasaka, or you have disappeared/returned to earth. hanako offers v a job if they had chosen to return to earth to die. your love interest makes reference to not having heard from you/wishes to see you soon.

- variation 2: goro survives, also escorts v to arasaka

takemura fills the roll of hellman, and ultimately proves that he is arasaka until the day he dies, even after the apparent ‘wavering’ dialogue. he didn’t make it this far in life without being able to lie the way he does. he’s a lot more gentle in the approach compared to hellman in asking v to return to mikoshi, there is some reminiscing dialogue, and also promises of visiting in the future if they manage to find v a body.

the biggest difference is should v choose to return to earth, takemura tells v to rot in hell for refusing arasaka’s help.

the sun (rogue)

this ending relies on side missions being completed for rogue (NOT just a good relationship with johnny, that is another ending as well that will be mentioned after). blistering love is the last one for rogue.

what happens is that you give johnny and rogue their last attempt at the assault on arasaka tower. johnny will be in control for the duration of this mission. rogue dies during the assault when adam smasher arrives. at mikoshi, johnny is the point of view character for the decision on who remains in v’s body. alt recognises that the relic has altered v’s body too much for v to remain there, but johnny would survive without problem.

- variation 1: v remains in control

johnny assimilates with alt in cyberspace and v returns to the world as a living legend. your love interest can potentially appear in the suite, but they recognise that v has become incredibly distant as a person (implied only a few months to live, that only they know of), and is taking on one last gig like no other. the love interest may potentially break up with v. ends with v eventually going to attack the crystal palace (casino in space).

- variation 2: johnny remains in control

vastly different, and i recommend playing this ending out at least once. johnny appears some time after the events of arasaka leaving the city, with collecting belongings and also going to visit the columbarium and deposit the bullet in v’s grave. it also gives a lot of insight into other memorials to characters you may have met in other side missions, there is jackie’s, rogue’s (per this ending), etc. johnny leaves night city.

- VARIATION 3: TECHNICALLY THE SECRET ENDING and in some cases considered ending 5

DIFFERENT in that it has a set of requirements that include maintaining a relationship with johnny ABOVE 70% (which can happen in the missions for him). need to wait and not decide on an ending for johnny to personally suggest this, so that no one else will die for them. it goes the same route as the rogue/johnny ending but instead v/johnny assault arasaka tower themselves. this is the HARDEST mission in the game, there is NO save option, you have to complete it in one go. if you die it is treated as an ending, and the end credits will even reference this with other characters talking about this. should you make it through, it plays out similarly following on from the other variations, save for the fact rogue will actually be alive, and the afterlife sequence will reflect her survival.

the star (aldecaldos)

should you befriend panam, including completing all of her lines (queen of the highway being the last), there is the offer to join them. it follows a very similar path in terms of attacking arasaka tower per rogue/johnny, but with the aldecaldos, and saul dies when adam smasher appears for the fight. this is one of the endings where you can choose who stays in v’s body however, but played from v’s point of view.

- variation 1: v remains in control

again, similarly follows the sun route, however v will wake up later with the aldecaldos en route to tucson. judy if romanced will join v, panam will obviously have a continuing romance, but river stays behind due to his family commitments with promises of maybe someday if they return, and kerry i believe at this stage, doesn’t want to give up night city just yet, but again similarly to river, promises.. it ends on a more hopeful note.

- variation 2: johnny remains in control

plays out like the sun ending.

path of least resistance (suicide)

easily the most heartbreaking. depending on how you may have played v, it is the one time they feel the most in control. johnny and v have an incredibly emotional discussion about death and life and rebirth. the credits will roll, and any relationships you have established will have a spoken part. i sobbed during the credits. it is.. yeah. well.

my opinion

the endings are confronting, or hopeful, depending on what is chosen. siding with arasaka goes against your better instincts, especially as a corporat. even after believing that perhaps takemura has changed, v realises that to his heart, that man will never leave. becoming a living legend just like jackie wanted leaves v feeling quite empty, as they have made it to the heights and there’s nothing for them. the aldecaldos are viewed as the best simply because there is that hope that in arizona, someone might be able to help, but potentially at the cost of your own relationship. and then... after seeing how much v has been punched down... the last ending just truly hurts. both in terms of characters understanding and being so angry at themselves and at v. i personally don’t know what specific ending i would choose for my v as i’m still working it out, but they all do punch in some way i personally think, especially if you have... actually played the story, and it does like tie off specific ends here and there. also like... finding out what happens to the peralezes and other people you might’ve met... yeah. i recommend playing through all of them + variations at least once (granted.. if you are comfortable with it. the arasaka ending is very invasive and well, the suicide ending can be incredibly uncomfortable).

[macgyvertape]

50 or so hours into Cyberpunk 2077

This should be roughly the correct amount of time, ive been leaving the game running as I get up to get food or do stretches. Quests are roughly in order I did them

non spoilers above cut:

 i haven't found a single hat/helmet i like, and since you can't hide them I just am not wearing any. It matters that much.

I posted the other day about bugs, every few hours I play I find new bugs. some require me to go back and reload a save others I honestly can’t tell if it’s a bug or just really poor development

there are several perks that don’t quite do what the description says, like the Anamesis perk. Based on reddit and trying it out it seems to just not do anything.

sometimes in car chase segments the passenger will say “look out” as cars spawn in my path and hit me. Can’t tell if that was deliberate or a pop in issue

Yeah I’ve just totally given up on doing pacifist things unless required by a mission. Given up on doing stealth too unless a mission objective, except for sneaking around to set up a fight.

:readmore:

the delemain car quest is fun. From the shock of the one going "beep beep motherfucker" and doing a hit and run to start it off, to the GLADOS car i see a lot of people talking about. It was fun to explore the city when i might have missed places like the landfill apparently there is follow up on T-bug's death if you go back to the quick hack shop in Kabuki. It's not much but better than nothing I made the pass with Panam of "what if the room just had one bed". I know she won't do a wlw romance, which is fine since I wouldn’t have chosen her.  I enjoy her as a character, don’t get me wrong, my V considers her as a friend, but it seems like theres always drama going on which would be tiring. I would have gone for a fling, i like her leotard-pants combo with all the straps

but also her questline was buggy as hell. Multiple cases of having to reload due to clipping into objects, including her in a driving section, or just insta-dying when collision physics with some rocks broke "your neural network can no longer function independantly of the chip" me slapping my desk: s y m b i o te!!! come on lets have some s y m b i o s i s

in the scene with hellman i really liked how Johnny moved around the room. It made him feel like he was really there. it was hard to follow the convo as I left the room, i would not have understood it without subtitles. But i guess Takemura fucking waterboarded hellman. :|

lol I hope the dialogue is different b/c i refuse to smoke for Johnny

i am level 18 and still can't beat the first opponents in the fist fighting quest. ffs

I looked up the romances options so I went to do the I fought the law quest as soon as i got it. ACAB, but like I literally just met River Ward 2 minutes ago, and I really like him. His earring and cyborg eye, his big fluffy coat. I'm definitely gonna sleep with him Ok i like how when River Ward is dealing with the tiger claws if you interject it leads to a fight. It goes better if you follow his instructions and let him deal with it. Seriously I enjoy that sometimes its good to not pick a dialogue choice.

during the red queen club part, there was no dialogue over the phone. So i reloaded a save and got myself spotted and attacked. Then River showed up to help me <3 and it was more enjoyable having him there. I honestly am not sure if him not going to the club level is bug or not.

then uuuuuugh the worst of irl police "cops are my family" from Detective Han. Again ACAB "FRATERNITY OF CITY COPS RESEMBLES A [Nomad] CLAN NOT AT ALL" ok a few minutes ago i was complaining about bugs, but the character modeling in this game is good (when they're there). You can see body posture, characters jiggle their legs when they are nervous. Like I though character A was just throwing a cigarette on the ground, but then character B flinches back; I realize Char A threw it at B as a fuck you

I'm honestly curious if "I fought the Law" quest will have any impact later on. My choices were that I thought there was more going on than Holt being the only person behind this (based on how complicated the main questline heist is, and keeping an eye on some of the in game news), and told him not to take it to internal affairs, and I loved his response of how he doesn't give a shit what we think, he's doing it anyway.

In the elevator to report in, Johnny said "this muck is deeper than you think, tell them nothing", so i just said that the case was complicated. anyway i love how much of a sarcastic asshole V is

I thought i was being nonlethal with the monk quest, but it seems i accidently killed someone. RIP, but thats kind of the problem with this game. Like when i do the non lethal cyberpychosis quests I equip my non lethal modded gun and hope for the est. I like how a go here kill things quest led to Charles the ripperdoc. He's getting all his parts from scav gang members so I felt obligated to take him out. I got a police bounty for it but w/e.

I merged the Delemain fragments with the whole. Guess he's the meta now. (Side note: some of my favorite rvb fanfic plots are Ai consiousness/memory merging with the humans, so I’m having fun with this game and look foward to introspective fanfic)

Honestly Jonny made some good points, the fragments didn't deserve to die; but also destroying the core and freeing the fragments, they couldn't really function alone.

I was able to rescue Saul fine with stealth. Using cameras and the synapse overload really made it easy.  Can't use the sniper rifle reward b/c I don't have the stats for it, and while it has a silencer the fact that it's a ricochette weapon and not a shoot through walls weapons, makes it not as good imo; and theres a legendary one that is stats free for only 100k.

Lol made a pass again at Panam, and she immediately shut me down. I then did Mitch's quest and I love every time someone tells V they area  good person.

I hacked the operation carpe noctem shard, and wow the corporations are using ai to make people have cyberpsychosis, or something like that. What a shocker /s, I've played Deus Ex HR before

lol driving through the unifinished interstate, past the fight from Panam's first quest I found a "batcave" with a very nice car, and a manifesto written by "muckman'. But here's my complaint about the loot, there is a legendary top, but it had 16 armor. My current top has 84 armor, like why would i switch?? then later i found a bunker with soviet spies in it. Wild

Doing River's second quest, love the timing of as soon as you ask, why are we breaking in, someone shows up to tell you he got kicked off the force. It's funny how Johnny comments how maybe River's into you, and V just doubts Johnny's words. Love how the first kid asks River if I'm his girlfriend. also wow like oof both the second parts of Judy and River's quest are SUPER fucked UP!! oof like i stopped doing first person mode on the braindances for those quests as soon as i could, just made me too uncomfortable seeing that in first person.

DRIVING IN THE GAME IS BAD! nowhere is it more apparent than the sinnerman quest, which took me 3 times to get the driving section done, as cars spawned out of nowhere to hit me. Then when you restart, there is a bunch of dialogue it doesn't let you fast forward through. The rest of the Sinnerman questline is interesting. My V took every option to tell the dude that he was messed up, and what he was doing was wrong. idk, I was surprised how much dialogue there was that let you buy into his whole "forgiveness thing" and how there wasn't any real dialogue to call him the fuck out, that in seeking forgiveness he continues to do harm both emotional to the mother of the man he killed, but also that he got the husband killed via cop. The later follow up quest, I told him that what he is doing is crazy, studio is just going to profit off this vid. Then I refused to join him prayer, and told him fuck no i wasn't going to hammer him to the cross, or even watch. Yes, the man is scared of dying, and the corporation is exploiting him, but he keeps creating burdens for others.  I think the discussion on this quest will be interesting to read, it's definitely my own personal experience with religion coloring my view. Anyway back to a main quest, yeah i don't trust Placide, especially in that scene where he grabs my hand, then jacks in. I ran off to do most of the sidequests here and got some criticism from him. I do love how in the cinema the western movie switches to a mission brief as the netwatch agent talks. its a fun enviromental detail.  I took the netwatch offer, i don't think he's being fully honest with me, but he didn't put a virus in my head. As I told Placide later, I didn't pick a side. I like how you can then talk with the agent, who is a fan of Western movies, b/c they show "a simpler time where all good guys carry badges" :eyeroll:, and then V recommends Unforgiven, which from the wiki summary goes against that theme.

Looks like the Voodoo boys all got killed by Netwatch, but I as revenge for them trying to set me up I'm fine with it. Honestly after speaking with ai!Alt I don’t believe their plan of trying to be on good relations with AI would work. 

doing the johnny flashback 2, and wow Johnny really is an asshole. Like I had gotten so used to him in side missions I forgot how self centered and unlikable he was.You constantly get prompts to drink or do drugs, which I ignored. But i do love the goth/punk love Rogue and others have.

lol i called it, when Hellman said that the engram would seek to override the host, put V on the engram. I really like how as the relic malfunctions, you wind up in the chair with a cigarette, which you can either smoke and say you are turning into Johnny or throw away. My dialogue "your problem is the ends justify the means", which is true!!! He and Rogue detonated a nuke downtown, does anyone know that, and like ask Rogue about it????

(Funny you can ask Rouge about Johnny silverhand, over the phone, then the game bugs out and spawns her npc where you are. She doens't say much about the nuke, but she does say no one trusts you for jobs). The line of no one trusting you for jobs is pretty funny at level 46 street cred where im at “respected” status. really loving the family atmosphere at River's 3rd quest. Also his big strong arms, and the fact he is no longer a cop. I totally let the kids win, and wow the family dinner where they GRILL YOU over the relationship and try to set the two of you up, then the water tower scene!!!!! I don't love the first person sex cutscenes but they do have personality. I'm glad afterwards you got to tell River about the biochip and that you might die. Because he's so far removed from your personal plot. So I took that option to back out of a relationship.

I do love that you wake up with "river's tanktop" that says "fuck the police" It actually has extremely good armor stats, so thats what I'll wear now.

panam 3rd quest, when shes like why did you help me, I'm like "because it's important to you". Basically the closest you can get to "when a friend asks for help you help them", which as an ex-nomad backstory I really choose the nomad options when ever i can Paralezes quest part 2! I love the piano song but I always think of it as ocean's 11 music. It's also fun to see the computer and see Judy recommended you for the first quest. The emails talk about "forgetting" to hire a staffer, on the balocony a strange antennia was scannable, the color of the roses was remembered wrong...  lol guess i was right with those giant wall screens. Its fun environmental details that spell things out before you can notice, and it ties into some other quests where people's behavior is being altered. Actually, this quest "Dream On" I love it! For a while I've been like "wheres the illuminati conspiracy! Here it IS! I chose to follow Elisabeth's wishes and not tell her husband he was being brainwashed. In best case they program him to forget again, in worst case he ends up dead. The gaslighting Elisabeth described is CHILLING, her husband describes a vacation she can't remember and she doesn't know whose memories have been messed with. On your way to the plaza you get a call from someone/something that says the know exactly WHAT you are, any you black out!!! It's such a great feeling of helplessness that you're just one person in a world so big that you can't fight every power. As Johnny said, could be a corporation, could be a rogue ai, either way Jefferson is fucked (and so are you).

[chapitre7]

Alexandria Chapter IV

The Untamed [陈情令] | Mo Dao Zu Shi [魔道祖师] fanfiction

Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji/Wei Yīng | Wei Wuxian (Wangxian)

Time Travel/Sci-Fi AU

Chapter I | Chapter II | Chapter III

Read on AO3

Against the odds, Wei Ying is a better student than teacher. Or is Lan Zhan the biggest mystery, ever patient to repeat himself, the same words, same sounds, the same movements of mouth, of breathing, and yet can’t bring himself play a full song to save his life?

 Over the course of several weeks, Wei Ying mentally compiles a picture book of Lan Zhan expressions. When he teaches, he’s solemn, slowly mouthing every word, as many times as it takes, until Wei Ying gets them right. Wei Ying vaguely wonders if Lan Zhan’s uncle, who taught him how to write and speak Wei Ying’s barely living language, was as detailed in his lessons, showing the position of the tongue and the origin of every sound until they break out of soft lips, or was it just Lan Zhan’s meticulousness? He teaches by example, leading him, never patronizing, hand firm in his writing, in the perfect form of an artist, making sure Wei Ying follows every turn of the written characters. Wei Ying is wrong so many times, but unlike the time when he wanted to defy his teachers, push the buttons of their so-called superior knowledge, he wants to make Lan Zhan proud. So he practices, even when he’s alone, so he can understand others and tell them all the things he has to say, ask all of his questions, and discover the secrets of the world, too.

 A whole different story is Lan Zhan as Wei Ying’s student, and Wei Ying swears, he never means to make fun of him or embarrass him, but Lan Zhan should know that he’s most funny, most adorable when he frowns and looks at the dizi like it has personally chosen him to wrong. It’s really not the scholar’s fault; although Wei Ying can read the music sheets he brings from dustiest shelves of the library and can teach Lan Zhan how to read them perfectly fine, he plays like a criminal, rushing over the tempo, skipping over entire passages, repeating the choruses like a spell to raise a fallen lover. Lan Zhan is ever confused, unable to bring to life the same vivid color of Wei Ying’s playing, and Wei Ying can’t help but smile behind his hand at the concentrated purse of his lips and the pleased light in his eyes when he manages to play the entire beginning section of a song, the moment broken when Wei Ying lets his laugh burst out of him when Lan Zhan is wrong, again, looking positively offended at the sheet music then at Wei Ying, proceeding to stand up and storm out of the room.

 Wei Ying is all, “I’m sorry, Lan Zhan, I was only playing around, you’re my best student, brilliant!”, until Lan Zhan shoves what must be one of the oldest relics of the Gusu Lan sect under his nose, saying nothing, offering a simple raised eyebrow. Knowing a challenge when it’s thrown at him, Wei Ying takes the sheet music from Lan Zhan’s hand, back straight, demeanor composed, and proceeds to widen his eyes at the inane amount of notes hand drawn on the paper. He hears a noise and looks up at Lan Zhan, who’s very much looking away and pressing his lips together in a fine line. They spend the following hours fighting the composition, “Wei Ying skipped a passage again”, “I know! Because it’s the fifth time he’s replaying it! He can get to the point already!”, “Wei Ying should follow the sheet”, until Lan Zhan’s brother interrupts them to announce it’s time to retire for the day.

 Wei Ying learns that yes, the smiling man he first met is Lan Zhan’s brother, one Lan Xichen, and that he really is just as nice as he looks. He never makes Wei Ying feel like he’s in the wrong place, doing the wrong things, as the other scientists do. As Wei Ying takes over every second of Lan Zhan’s day, Lan Xichen assumes the tasks of bringing them food or tea with the same kind diligence Wei Ying had witnessed when he was sore and scared and a bit wild. Watching the brothers from afar, speaking words he has not yet learned, serious things, possibly even about him, Wei Ying is both broken and saved. He’s incomplete with the absence of his own brother, so unlike Xichen, so cranky and desperate for approval, and he’s rebound with the sentiment that this still exists, this kind of effortless, unconditional bond.

 He’s glad he got to know Lan Zhan. He’s his teacher, his companion, his friend, a sum of his experiences and more, because he... stays. Whether out of obligation or something else that Wei Ying dares not question, dares not disturb, he stays. Over days and weeks and months, he stays.

 “I volunteered.”

 A year after his rebirth, Wei Ying moves out of the laboratories and into the personal quarters with the blue walls. He too has a door with cloud patterns, just by Lan Zhan’s corner, close enough that he can hear Lan Zhan practice the dizi on the days he’s feeling particularly stubborn, but not too close that Wei Ying can’t make a run for his door to call him on certain mornings when he’s up early, invoking the wrath of the elders and what he has learned is a reprimand that means running inside the facility is forbidden.

 ***

 “Is your real name Lan Wangji?”

 Lan Zhan stops typing away on his paper-thin device, just the tiniest hints of surprise in his blinks. Wei Ying feels vaguely offended. Surely Lan Zhan didn’t think he was that oblivious?

 “I thought it was just a word I hadn’t learned yet but brother Xichen uses it whenever he’s talking to you.”

 Lan Zhan licks his lips, staring down at the device on the table as if, with a will of his mind, it’ll start projecting answers. Wei Ying knows it can’t do that, as much as he’s certain that it’s not really such a difficult question. They had been strangers when they met, a researcher and his subject, it couldn’t even be considered a lie, just a way to set the line behind which they should stand. But Wei Ying had crossed that line a long time ago, with every memory of his old travels, pranks and meetings that were born anew as Lan Zhan guided him through the wonders the facility studied every day; with every new text they read together, and the sketches he drew of Lan Zhan when the other was too busy to notice.

 He’s not even mad, but the way Lan Zhan fidgets in his own self-contained way, staring down at his own flexing fingers, makes Wei Ying nervous too. In his original time, one’s name carried the significance of their place in the world, Wei Ying knew it well. But these new Cloud Recesses that he’s still discovering carries so much objective logic and wonder with the distinct lack of politics that he’s suddenly afraid he had missed something crucial. The thought of Lan Zhan keeping secrets from him leaves him cold, brings forth a bigger, more devastating feeling of loss; if Lan Zhan was taken away from him, if he somehow couldn’t be with Wei Ying any longer, if he was kicked out of the facility, lost his home (the thought that he felt at home with Lan Zhan, a thought that startles him just as much) a second time, what would be left?

 (The rest of the world?)

 “Lan Zhan?” He tries, voice low, as it almost never is. It makes Lan Zhan look up at him, and even though there’s no sharpness in his eyes, Wei Ying doesn’t allow the acid at the back of his throat to settle until he starts talking.

 “Wangji is the name chosen for me when I enrolled in the academy here, and the one I use as a researcher.”

 “So it’s like a courtesy name?”

 Lan Zhan nods and Wei Ying exhales noisily, letting the tension out of him in an embarrassed laugh. Why did it seem like such a hard truth to tell?

 “So Lan Zhan is your birth name?”

 When he nods again, Wei Ying easily falls back into his trusted habits, chin coming to rest on his palm, eyes narrowing like a cat’s.

 “Lan Wangji, Lan Wangji,” he teases, tasting every syllable, and Lan Zhan’s eyes change immediately, bracing for impact. “Do you often tell your birth name to strangers on a first meeting?”

 “So did you,” he shoots back, always the perfect sparring partner, picking his device back up, pretending the conversation is over.

 “But I’m a shameless old man,” Wei Ying says in mock defense, a hand poised on his chest. Lan Zhan looks at him like a stern, tired teacher, over a non-existent brim of glasses.

 “We’re the same age.”

 Wei Ying is proud that he can decipher that the tone is only mock exasperation, and that there’s a slight tilt to the side of his lips.

 “Only in estimate.”

 Lan Zhan lets out the tiniest of huffs and stands up, ignoring Wei Ying’s laughter and how he falls over to the floor, apparently looking to occupy his hands and attention with making tea.

 “We’re out of tea,” he announces. Wei Ying regards him coolly from his spot on the floor, hair sprawled out messily, smile still mischievous.

 “Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying calls.

 “I’ll be right back,” he continues, pointedly not looking at Wei Ying, who’s now gleefully giggling, repeating his name with no real purpose other than riling him up. Wei Ying keeps looking at the door even after he’s left, giggling dying out into a comfortable buzz on his chest.

 Lan Zhan, who could speak for a long time about all the changes in the world that Wei Ying missed, making the complicated sound easy, rarely speaks about himself. When Wei Ying asks, he doesn’t lie or ignore him, but his answers are short, objective, and he soon diverts the topic, demanding Wei Ying to pay attention to something here or there and not to him. But he had said his name was Lan Zhan; exposing himself from the beginning.

 “I volunteered.”

 Was Lan Zhan a wall to be climbed or a book wanting to be read?

 Wei Ying sits up, crawling over to Lan Zhan’s cushion. His device is still lying on the table, and Wei Ying has already seen it being used enough times that he’s positive he can handle it a bit. He doesn’t think Lan Zhan will be angry at him, unless he messes something up, which he has no plans to do. He just wants a peek at more of Lan Zhan and his views. Maybe not a secret Lan Zhan, but details he’s too shy to tell, whatever little piece of him he can get. Was there anything he wouldn’t tell his friend?

 His hand hesitates in the air. Then, like a leap of faith, he touches the pad.

 The device flares into life without a sound. Wei Ying brings it to his eye level, noticing it contains only words; Lan Zhan seemed to be writing a report. Even though Wei Ying had interrupted his thinking, Lan Zhan didn’t leave his last sentence open, dutifully finishing whatever he starts. Wei Ying can’t put a lot of meaning to the text at a glance, so he’s about to slide the document away when a word catches his eye.

 Yunmeng.

 Wei Ying halts, Lan Zhan’s report calling to him. He holds the pad with both of his hands, frantic eyes catching only bits and pieces of meaning in intelligible disconnection. He’s a shame to both his master and Lan Zhan, his teacher, too curious or anxious or excited to focus, so he closes his eyes. Inhales. Don’t rush, he can hear Lan Zhan’s voice, already a part of him. Take your time, Wei Ying.

 So he starts from the beginning, finger gently scrolling the text to the top. Whatever he had been expecting, had been anxious to know, was not that. He can feel surprise unraveling him, his face warm and fingers cold.

 He considers himself great at many things, but sketching is not one those, despite a few art classes he took at the Cloud Recesses. They called it part of refining one’s senses, but Wei Ying’s sharp edges and heavy shadows on the paper always displeased his teachers and disgusted his Gusu Lan classmates, so he didn’t bother with it for long. He did, however, pick up some technique, and combined with his predisposition to doodle, he would often distract himself with sketching, and it was no different when he told his stories to Lan Zhan. The bare trees of Yiling, the opulence of Lanling’s towers, the halls of the Cloud Recesses, filled with disciples holding books and scrolls. He drew it so he could preserve what he knew he would forget, time an unforgiving lord. He thought it silly, self-indulgent. He assumed Lan Zhan had thrown the pieces away, or kept them in a drawer somewhere in his room so they could be forgotten, or maybe had even given them to the other researchers so they could catalog them with everything else that Wei Ying owned.

 But there it is, at the top of Lan Zhan’s writing, perfectly blending in like an illustration in one of his books. A lone pavilion standing in the middle of a lotus pond, flowers flourishing elegantly and widely, leaves spreading beyond the eye of the beholder, the whole of Lotus Pier nothing but distant lines in the background. It was always summer whenever Wei Ying thought of Yunmeng, and so it would forever be summer in the Yunmeng others saw through him.

 He wants to touch the digital copy of his drawing but doesn’t, afraid of doing something to it that couldn’t be undone with his inexperience. So he scrolls down to Lan Zhan’s text, focusing so hard to decipher the code that he doesn’t hear Lan Zhan return or acknowledge him at all until he sits down where Wei Ying was teasing him just a few moments ago.

 Home of Jiang sect, Lotus Pier, he can make out. Warriors of untamed spirit [...] could withstand extreme temperatures, ranging from suffocating humid heat to piercing cold, at times in the span of twelve hours. [...] prime physical condition was the pride of the sect and its people, as well as their outstanding swimming abilities and endurance, making them a strong ally and protector, and a dangerous rival to cross [...]

 Lan Zhan doesn’t make any movements to stop Wei Ying from what he’s doing nor does he make any sound to draw his attention. He just settles, drinking his tea, observing the other’s furrowed brow.

 [...] When the wind is still, the water is a mirror of the sky, and the pink lotus flowers seem to grow out of a pale blue pond, among the clouds.

 Wei Ying had told him that. Maybe not in those words, he’s not entirely sure, but it is his image, his vision. It’s him speaking, not a scholar, not a historian. It’s him, through Lan Zhan’s eyes.

 He looks up from the pad, the motion drawing Lan Zhan’s attention from his teacup to him.

 “You wrote all this... based on our conversations?”

 Lan Zhan nods, breaking eye contact, appearing too silent and small in the way he keeps looking down at his empty cup.

 “How many have you written?”

 “Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan starts but loses his voice when he makes eye contact again. Wei Ying just raises his eyebrows, waiting for an answer. Lan Zhan exhales, and it’s strange to hear him make any kind of noise. “They’re in chronological order.”

 Wei Ying’s eyes lose focus as he tries to recall the last time he talked about anything from his past. Yunmeng had been... Just a few days ago, and the last time he had remembered something.

 So all of them, he meant.

 From the moment he left Yunmeng, everything and everyone he knew becoming just a blur in the distance, gossip followed him everywhere. Ungrateful, they called him. Ambitious, up to no good. What could an orphan who abandoned his foster family achieve? Meddlesome. The more places he visited, the more things he learned, the more experience he gathered, and the more the sects asked about him, the more they would whisper about Wei Wuxian. When he disappeared, what did they talk about? And for how long did they remember him by, before they found someone else to slander?

 And there in his hands is his life, as told by someone else. An assignment is another thing he’s become.

 “I...”

 Lan Zhan looks crestfallen. Wei Ying wishes the emotions weren’t so clear, that he could have hidden them just like seemed to do with all of the others, so he could begin to think clearly again, without being pulled back and forth between who he had been and who he’s become.

 “I didn’t turn them in.”

 Lan Zhan’s hands, by then clasped together, clench. Hands that showed Wei Ying the constellations in the endless sky, projected on walls that seemed to go on forever. Hands that clumsily played the dizi, that underlined poems, that touched without hurting.

 “I wanted to show you first. I wouldn’t take credit alone. I just...”

 Just what? He couldn’t fill in Lan Zhan’s ellipses, not in the way he apparently could fill Wei Ying’s. He looks down at the pad and there’s only one thing he wants. He moves from his spot, scooting closer to a Lan Zhan who’s frozen, not even perceptibly breathing, and hands him the object of conflict.

 “Read for me.”

 It’s less a request, more a demand, without bite, without resentment. Pressing against Lan Zhan’s side, eyes expectant on the screen, he feels Lan Zhan’s shoulders stand firmer from their slouch, before the warmth of his voice falls comfortably on his ears.

 He reads slowly, carefully translating what Wei Ying couldn’t understand on his own. The descriptions of the sects are straightforward but every destination has a color, just like Yunmeng’s, in the stone walls of Qinghe, the harsh, reddened soil of Yiling, even the snow of Gusu. He completes the gaps of Wei Ying’s retellings like he had actually been there, eating loquats in Caiyi Town, sharing the burden of Wei Ying’s freedom. There’s no malice in his words, no rumors, just a naive, hopeful heart that saw the beauty in people and life despite man’s warped motivations and fears and greed.

 What would he have been like, in that life? At one point, Wei Ying had placed his head on Lan Zhan’s shoulders, a hand touching his elbow but not quite circling it. He only has to tilt his head slightly to see his profile, long lashes, long nose, unmarred skin, mouth still moving to tell a story. If Lan Zhan had met him when he was Wei Wuxian, would he have befriended him, spent time with him, traveled with him? And if Lan Zhan had been there, if he were by his side and only by his side, so they could rise above all of the rumors, would he have... Would Wei Ying have ended up...

 “Lan Zhan.”

 Lan Zhan’s voice trails off in his reading; always pleasant, never noisy. Wei Ying touches his cheek to his shoulder.

 “The fire in the Cloud Recesses... Was it during your time?”

 A pause, then an affirmative hum. Wei Ying’s breath hitches before he exhales.

 “What did you lose?”

 He expects him to say something like immeasurable knowledge or a lifetime of progress that held the world back. Instead, he says,

 “Mother. Father.”

 Pain runs through him as if pumped by his bloodstream. All the knowledge in the world to make up from that kind of hurt. And Wei Ying had traveled and traveled and learned and conversed and he had ended up North, out of places to go, out of things to hear. He raises his head again, tracing that profile with his eyes again.

 “And still you’re so...”

 Wei Ying raises his hand and tucks the loose strands of Lan Zhan’s bangs behind his ear. Lan Zhan turns his head slowly, almost reluctantly, to face him, and the words linger in the air between them, the ends of his thoughts touching Lan Zhan by his fingertips, comforting, but which one of them, Wei Ying wouldn’t be able to tell. He pats his head, traces his eyebrow, brushes his knuckles against his cheek before letting his hand fall. With a sigh, he pulls himself away, brings himself to his feet, and walks to the door, not looking behind to see the expression on Lan Zhan’s face, not stopping until he’s in his own room, sliding down against his door, all the way to the floor, nursing both the hurt and the affection that try to suffocate him.

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Books

Divorce and Remarriage in the Church by David Instone-Brewer. Before anyone gets their knickers in a twist, no, I’m absolutely not considering this. Friend is going through this and said it should be a general read in the Christian community because it also teaches theology and what questions you ask when reading the Bible, and how not to say things like, “Well, guess you can never get remarried,” to your friend going through divorce because it isn’t true. That prelude being said... I’m still not done yet, but I’m at least 3/4 through and it is blowing my mind almost every chapter and I will be reading this book aloud and posting it to Youtube, as I’ve been doing with other books recently, because it’s THAT important.

A Map of Days by Ransom Riggs. I’m not entirely sure what to think of this book. It definitely made me feel better about the too-many-coincidences-helping-our-heroes-out issues of the previous book. I think I’ll trek with this series a bit longer (she says, having come to the end of the book which cliffhangers off, promising ANOTHER in the works).

Watership Down by Richard Adams. I read this book a few times as a child and then again as highschool required reading (I was mortally offended when classmates referred to it as “the bunny book” as if it was some cute little hoppity hop hop fluff novel). It’s pretty much how I remembered it. Gritty. Puts you in with rabbits and the mindset of the animal (can’t really count higher than four, get to know each other through touch and smell and breathing rate and play, revere stories of tricksters, etc) and is overall a wonderful and absorbing read. I also greatly appreciate the inclusion of a glossary of terms in the back whenever the text doesn’t immediately explain a word. 2/3 through my re-read and it’s a comforting book to go through again, after all these years. My copy doesn’t even have a front cover anymore and the back cover is dogged and all the pages are near-brown and all the swear words are blotted out from my super puritanical phase where I wanted to censor all my books as a teen. It’s a lovely relic of bygone days and a comforting read. Though now I’m irritated at myself for all the blotted out words jarring me out of a good reading flow.

On Deck: Trauma Stewardship by Laura Van Dernoot Lipskey and Connie Burk.

Shows

Watership Down (Netflix). (before re-reading the book) I guess this could be classed as “miniseries” or “very long movie broken into four parts”. Last time I read Watership Down was in high school for assigned reading, though I had already read it as a morbid little kid and loved it. I can’t remember all details, but whoever made this show quite obviously loved the source material. It does similar things as the book, like dumping you into the rabbits’ vocabulary without explaining and allowing you to pick up what things mean as you watch (or hoping you read the book and already understand the words). Nothing rings very false to what I remembered. This is a well done adaptation. It’s a little hard to distinguish most of the rabbits from each other, but stepping back and watching with a general comprehension (instead of getting absolutely stuck on figuring out which rabbit is which) is useful in this case. Overall? Good watch. (revision of opinion post re-reading the book, see above point) So I’m starting to see where the Netflix version took a bit of a left turn. It did a fairly good job, though actually the book didn’t drop us into the terminology as sharply as I thought I remembered. The thing that stands out to me the most is that Netflix brought more females to the front of the story and that does actually bother me to a certain extent, and here’s why: where is the sense in dropping human morality onto an animal STORY? An animal FABLE is a whole different kettle of fish. An animal FABLE is like Animal Farm, where animal characters are intended to stand in for human counterparts to deliver hard truths. An animal STORY is like Watership Down or The Promise of the Wolves or Venus Among the Fishes and all stories that take place WITHIN the animal world as if we, the reader, are experiencing things from the animal point of view entirely. In the book, Watership Down, the female rabbits (does) are looked on mostly as acquisitions to be made and are not very plot relevant beyond that, but this is understandable because, simply, they are animals. This isn’t about human morality, this is about prey mammals figuring out survival, both day to day survival and survival of their warren. To this end, the males (bucks) do most of the planning and fighting and trickstering wherein lies the action of Watership Down. By bringing the does to the forefront, it feels like Netflix was trying to shoehorn in some human morality because saying otherwise would be distasteful to people watching. But. It’s. About. Animals. So this is a bit of a sticking point for me that does bother me. However, overall, I saw nothing that truly gutted the heart of the book and still consider it worth a watch.

Steven Universe: The Recent Upheavals. I don’t know. I love the new fusion designs. I absolutely adored That Scene (got chills when he shouted). But I’m not sure how I feel about a lot of the rest. Very conflicted.

Ditched after one episode list: Dragon Pilot (Netflix), Last Hope (Netflix).

Movies

Albion: The Enchanted Stallion. Okay, I guess? Writing was kind of mediocre, but another one where they were obviously trying with beautiful sets and costumes.

Shrek. It’s been a long time but it was a good rewatch. The gross stuff always gets to me a bit, but the thing is they built it to be totally in character and part of this creature’s fairytale existence which earns it more points. Shrek has always been one of the most loving fairytale deconstruction mockery movies and now I want to rewatch the second one because I remember it being superior in every way to an already wonderful first movie.

The Prince of Egypt. It’s been a long time. I was struck again how beautiful certain songs on that soundtrack are (any of the large chorus songs and the Heaven’s Eyes song especially) and the utter despair of coming to repeated dead ends, but how in spite of that, no. God was always there. I have a million questions about why the dead ends and heart-hardening was necessary in the first place BUT. God was still always there. And the Jews exist to this day. This movie isn’t, of course, completely accurate but it is beautiful and it reminded me of things I needed reminding about.

Games

Life is Strange 2, chapter 1. Conflicted on a couple of points. Character Caricatures don’t sit well with me in general. But it’s beautiful and gripping and I’m looking forward to continuing with chapter 2 soon.

[apocahipster]

here’s just some author’s notes for the huge taz fic i finished today

you can read it here if you want

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13468608/chapters/30877473

Author’s notes,, i haven’t proofed these so, apologies ;000

 Wow. Huge. This is literally the biggest thing ive ever written to completion. I had the whole fic planned before I uploaded the first chapter, and to accentuate the planning I had a 100+ page document of notes and also had an excel sheet which looked like this:

(the yellow on the left means summer, and blue when it was winter. The second column is day of the year, third important dates. On the right is the events which I highlighted yellow as I wrote them)

and like this

Its also the first fic I decided to upload as I wrote each chapter because I knew it would take about a year to complete. I wanted fan support (which I got and loved <3 ) and I didn’t want to sit on the whole thing and constantly re-write it and end up hating it and never publishing it.

So the way this fic began is I was listening to TAZ balance for the first time and as I different scenes or dialogue occurred I started taking notes on my phone for how they would translate to a high school setting. This whole thing started around the time I was at crystal kingdom and ironically, that’s were im up to in my relisten at the time of publishing the last chapter.

The other, very original, formative idea for the fic was this:

Magnus beats up kids who are homophobic to Taako as a way to cover for the fact that he is also bi // Thinks he’s straight and overly supportive of his gay friends

 Similarly, in the original idea, it was going to be Julia who had died, not magnus’ dad. There was a really depressing scene where magnus spent the day with Julia’s parents.

Another formative idea was,

My name is Taako, you know, from Instagram.

And I suppose in the end this was the most impactful because I decided that I personally specialise in writing comedy based things. I wanted this to be a light-hearted fun fic.

In the original fiction, Travis and the other McElroys show regret that Magnus’ story is formed around the death of a woman (Julia). Similarly in sensitivity to the McElroy’s personal background I decided that this was not the right thing to write about. But I also wanted this story to be a magnus emotional journey. By choosing his dad as the character who had died I could keep many things planned such as magnus’ one year gap, Fischer as a therapy fish, Magnus’ aggression etc.

My favourite TAZ character is magnus, if that wasn’t obvious. But ironically, I feel like of all the characters his dialogue is the most OOC. While I tried to keep his thought-logic and actions to Magnus I don’t feel like magnus would say 99% of what my magnus did. Conversely Taako seemed like one of those characters who would be hard to pinpoint but I actually found him easiest to write.

Taako’s magic stone which ultimately ruined the play was introduced as I felt I was focusing too much on Taako’s appearance and not the fact he is incredibly smart and a brilliant wizard.

So I decided to make this fic mostly lighthearted. I wanted to squeeze as many highschool tropes in like the gigantic party, the school play, the football match. The last chapter has a scene in a class for every subject as I felt like I somewhat forgot to write them ever being in class for a large chunk of the middle section. But then again no one really want to read about school do they?

I almost always write my stories to a song, but in this case it was an album. Vance Joy’s Dream Your Life Away, and while I love the music I never want to hear it again for like at least a few months. I would play the whole album every time I sat down to write this thing. It set the summer-time mood for the fic. If you listen to the songs youll probably find places where each song inspired bits of the fic.

The first song Wind’s of Change begins with the like ‘I miss you more than you could know’ which began the driving idea of Magnus dealing with the loss of his father. The song ‘first time’ begins with a line about jumping in the neighbours pool which obviously… inspired magnus jumping into a pool. ‘The best that I can’ inspired Magnus and Mr Waxmen’s interaction. I love the idea of a teenage boy who keeps doing the wrong thing, feeling shame in himself and in his mentor and trying to get better.

The song ‘from afar’ was initially Taako’s song. This whole fic was going to be a Taako / Magnus / Kravitz fic where Taako convinces Magnus to take care of himself and Magnus realises Taako is in love with him and this helps him discover he’s bi and it was super dramatic. There was (an still is) some Magnus / Kravtiz scenes too mostly in the form of flirting.

As I stepped away from this being a ship heavy fic this song became Lucretia’s song. Lucretia’s unrequited love to Lup was mostly written from the heart, and I’m so sorry to Lucretia stans, she deserves all the GFs in the world. But I felt this was a very powerful thing to write in a teen story.

Taako’s fear of LDR is also taken from the heart. In a way this whole fic was a serious vent from my high school experience. Similarly as I am now 21, I didn’t feel comfortable nor did I even really conceptualise any NSFW scenes for this fic. It just didn’t seem to have a place. Besides, sex is in almost all other teen movies and books. I also wanted to keep weed out of this one bc I personally hate how drugs are in every teen story.

I actually had a planned acronym for the IPRE, the Insufferable Prick Resistance Ensemble, and a short backstory that Magnus Taako Lup and Merle formed the group in their youth to complain about annoying classmates.

Writing Lydia and Edward was the worst. I don’t know how to write cool and sassy kids. Me at me: don’t make me do it again.

 Heres the entirety of my prepared barry notes:

Barry

-Oculus, opens portals?

-Likes pretty girl?!!?!?!

 I had a planned thing for how each of their grand relics could play into the fic but it was far too much work.

I was also planning on writing wayyyy more Lucretia and wayyyy less Barry. Bc Lucretia was basically me as a teenager. But I started writing Barry as one of my friends and this helped me just write bundles and bundles of Barry content.

I really didn’t have anything planned for davenport. Even drawing his yearbook I was like whelp idk. The idea of him becoming a sports strategist kicked in right as I was writing the paragraph about killian being the new jock, simply bc the section needed to be longer and frankly, I love how his story turned out.

Part of scrapping the original, edgy tone of julia’s death and taako / magnus romance was wanting to continue the tradition where TAZ is a world separate of racism and homophobia. I scrapped original ideas of magnus being provoked by homophobic remarks and transphobic remarks about lup, wanting this to also be an escapist piece like TAZ is. Therefore coming up with other reasons for magnus to get into fights was hard and also I hate writing fights bc ive never been in a fight in my life.

The first half of this fic I was riding an enthusiasm high and just adding scenes and conversations as I thought of them and listened to the story. By about the end of semester 3 I still cared about the fic but I was basically writing everything I had pre-planned with little innovation.

All in all, this was extremely fun to write, and I think it made me a much, much, much better author. I love anyone who read the whole thing sm.

[kravkalackin]

I know you might be getting a lot of asks for your fics and im sorry for contribute to that but.. are you going to delete your fics or something? I loved rereading them even if they arent finished.. uff, i wish I could get into taz so I could read more of your fics but I dont really understand what is about so Im not really interested but i kinda want to. hey,do you think you could give me a summary or explain me taz? if not, is ok!, Ive been meaning to ask because id like to try listening again

oh don’t worry! I’m not going to delete any of my fics, absolutely not. the very first fanfiction i ever wrote, back on my old ff.net account, that is absolutely horrid is still up, i’m definitely not taking down these recent fics that I’m still proud of despite not being able to continue. I just felt bad that people were still hoping for me to continue with new chapters when i’ve lost that spark and wanted to say something. 

So The Adventure Zone! Okay, taz is a dungeons and dragons podcast, at least for the first main storyline, Balance (which i recommend starting with and am going to explain). Don’t know anything about dungeons and dragons? it’s okay, the people playing don’t really either. 

As for what it’s about, it follows the adventures of a human fighter named magnus burnside, a dwarven cleric named merle highchurch, and an elven wizard named taako. They’re offered a job and that goes not so great and end up working for a secret organization on the moon to collect these super dangerous relics that have the power to destroy the world. Each arc follows them on a mission to retrieve one of the seven grand relics and only dying like 11 or 68 times in the process. For some reason, they’re the only three who can resist the thrall of these relics.

So you know how homestuck starts off real goofy and not being serious or making a lot of sense, but then it gets heart wrenching and meaningful and full of amazing character development and plot twists you genuinely never saw coming? TAZ has a lot of that. Like I said, it’s a dnd podcast, played by three brothers and their dad. there’s a lot of ribbing and goofs, especially at the beginning. i mean, it’s the same exact homestuck warning, ‘hey it’s a little slow and stupid at the beginning, but then cascade/arms outstretched happens and you’re crying.’ 

here’s an official animated trailer i’d recommend watching to get a feel for the kind of humor to see if it’s your thing. it’s good to watch if you want to avoid any serious spoilers 

and here’s an unofficial trailer if you care a little less about avoiding spoilers that shows both the humor and the kind of emotional depths the podcast ends up getting into 

like, i seriously can’t recommend taz enough. if straight up dnd fantasy isn’t your thing, don’t worry because it gets into a real cool fantasy/sci-fi combo pretty fast. it’s real real good, so definitely give it a chance if you’re even the least bit interested 

[xaeneron]

On Daybreak

Living World Season 4 is here and I guess that means it’s time to babble a bit about the first episode, Daybreak!  

Overall, the patch was a solid release, not without its bugs, but a solid release.  I’m super glad to have something new to do (a lot of new things to do), especially with a new raid wing out 9 months after the release of Bastion of the Penitent.  I am curious enough to stay tuned to see where the story goes, but I was definitely more distracted by the nostalgia factor than anything.  The new zone was incredibly nostalgic for me as an old hat GW1 player, but before we start bullet-pointing, let’s put in a line break to avoid spoilers front and center.  

In General

THANK GOD KEYRING.

QoL Astral Force refilling to full automatically after a party wipe in fractals and raids is a godsend.  No more asking for corpses before every encounter/after every wipe.  I am a happy druid.

The Binding of Ipos wasn’t exactly what I was expecting, but it’s an incredibly nice-looking focus.  I like the floating book, but the demon hand is a bit of a deal-breaker for the characters I would use the focus on (i.e., Eet).  Oh well.  It’s detailed and has great animations, which is nice.

On Fractals (Twilight Oasis, instability changes, Deroir)

I find it really amusing and fantastic that the new fractal vendor is named after Deroir.  Props to him; he’s done a lot for the fractal community and it’s awesome that he got recognition like Dulfy and WP.

The new fractal relic sinks are hilarious and ridiculous.  When they said sinks, they meant sinks.  I have a few months’ worth of everything saved up (infusions, [pristine] fractal relics, integrated fractal matrices, pages, etc.) and I was only able to afford the first level of mist attunement.  So much raw stuff.  

The karma one seems most useful to actually max though.

I wish they had introduced more things to buy with cosmic essences (from Shattered Observatory CM), or trades for them.  I have almost enough for an infusion and a tonic, but I want neither. ;-;

Fractal Vindicators are actually a bit of a threat?  More than Fractal Avengers anyway.  

I haven’t tried the Molten Boss rework yet, but the Mai Trin rework is amusing.  And I’m glad that you can push through the timegate cannon section.  

Not having Social Awkwardness on Nightmare and Shattered Observatory is hilariously nice.  Like seriously they’ve honestly gotten easier.

Speaking of, SO still has a bunch of bugs.  SURPRISE.  Although it sounds like the fractal dev found the problem, so...we’ll see?

Twilight Oasis was...dark.  Like twilight.  /shot

Okay but really.  Playing as Sunspear traitors and helping Palawa Joko by slaughtering Sunspears and villagers is dark.  And you get an achievement for stomping all the injured people.  

Dying and being resurrected by Joko was confusing but pretty great?  Also boing.

Dervish feels.

That ending doe.

On Hall of Chains

NEW RAID.  IN THE UNDERWORLD.  I AM A HAPPY HUMAN.  SALAD.  MIDGET.  THING.

I’m super excited about the Underworld and Dhuum.  Stuff that hasn’t been touched on in years, and a good bit of lore that I’m glad that they were able to find a way to visit again.

Also the encounters, particularly Dhuum, look legitimately challenging.  I’m so excited to go hit Dhuum and die repeatedly.

We’ve been poking the new raid this week and I might post some progress stuff later on?  We only have a few bite-sized sessions each week so we can’t spam it for hours on end like others, but we’re making progress and it’s exciting!  Having new stuff to do is fantastic.

We have a lot of stupid deaths (including dying immediately on flying in because someone didn’t take the champion buff) already and it’s amazing.

I saw the ending cutscene.  I have so many Underworld feels.  Dhuum’s fight seems very reminiscent of his fight back in GW1, which is pretty clever.  And nostalgic.

I kind of wish Anet would hide Glenna’s vendor items tied to each boss in her inventory instead of just having them greyed out.  You can spoil the whole wing by scrolling down and seeing there’s a Dhuum mini.  Oh well.

Hi Gwen.

On the Domain of Istan

There are so many “Praise Joko!” and “TO VABBI!” references.  When we found out that you could drink from the fountains of Joko in the main hall before destroying them and would shout “Praise Joko!” every time, we kept clicking them repeatedly hoping for a hidden achievement.  rip.

Nostalgia feels everywhere.  I didn’t think I missed Istan, but I guess I missed Istan.  Also super exciting that they kept most of the geography the same.  Kamadan/Palawadan is set up essentially the way it was in GW1, except it’s been Joko’d.  They’ve been consistent about doing that for a lot of things now, things like the location of the Temple of the Ages and Droknar’s Forge and things like that), but seriously.  Kudos.  I’s happy.  xD

I find the zone pretty and interesting to run around in.  There’s a lot of random little achievements and random places to make use of different mounts. 

Bunny-hopping all over the cliffs is life.

So is griffoning.  Good god it’s nice to griffon places and just fly around and look at things.

The meta events are amusing, and I enjoyed running into Amala again (after Twilight Oasis and the story).  Also raiding Palawadan.  Fun events with a relatively forgiving timer.

Although I’m disappointed that people are already “multilooting” these.  You’d think Anet would have learned their lesson from AB multiloot and made account caps on the chests per cycle.

On the story (Daybreak)

Hi Aurene.  You got bigger.  And less cute.  But still Aurene.  So.  pls come back ;-;

Rytlock and Canach continue to amuse.  Best bromance 10/10.

I said it before and I’ll say it again, I’m not sure why anyone would be surprised that Kralkatorrik is now obnoxiously powerful.  Letting it absorb a couple Elder Dragons’ worth of magic will do that.

I know some people get upset with all the one-liners, and honestly sometimes they are a bit to much and could be done without to keep tension going, but I appreciated a lot of them.  Especially since the characterization of the PC is very close to a general perspective of how Ive normally reacts to things - with dry humor and snark to prevent himself from getting overwhelmed.

“I died once.  It’s overrated.”

KOSS.  OMG KOSS.  Another sad fate for a GW1 hero (alongside the fate of Tahlkora), but nice to talk to him again.

Although the encounter definitely shows that the story instances are tuned to 1-2 people.  We did it with 3-4 at various times looking for achieves, and absolutely murdered him before his first breakbar showed up.  Welp.

References to a bunch of old characters from GW1 ayyyy

I love the fact that the prison cell break is unique per class.  I didn’t think much of it because Ive is a thief and picking the lock just seems like the reasonable thing to do, not the thiefy thing to do, but they’re class unique!  I replayed it with Cyra (my adorable sparkle charr) just to see the Legendary Prisoner Stance (Palawa Joko). 

Fahranur.  Oh my god.  From the ibogas outside to the giant smashy bells.  Nostalgia everywhere.  I love that these elements came back.  

Seriously Joko wtf.

What are these bugs you’re experimenting on.

Joko pls.

That’s a lot of dead Inquest.

Hi Braham.  No, I didn’t really want to see you again.  Thanks for acting like it’s all my fault.  Which it honestly is, but hey.  Still a grump.  At least Rox is here?

I am curious that Anet brought him back here and now.  But I’m willing to see what they planned for him.

Also news that Awakened are portaling around Tyria is mildly stressful.

Taimi’s voice actor, Debby Derryberry.  A+ work.  That sense of fear and dread from Hero of Istan through Fahranur, the First City was well done.  Probably one of the highlights of the release.  Happy that Taimi didn’t die though :>

...to Vabbi? 

[rogue-rook]

many many highlights from The Crystal Kingdom from a first-time TAZ listener

featuring some bits from the Lunar Interlude II: Internal Affairs

travis: “it was streaming on witch. that’s like magical twitch!”

SWEET ANGO HAS RETURNED!

i cannot believe griffin went to the EFFORT of making a fantasy costco jingle

the lockpicking garden gnome called the Nitpicker that insults the damn party is a beyond brilliant object for sale at the fantasy costco

I really want to lodge a complaint with the HR department of the bureau of balance on sweet angus macdonald’s behalf bc these grown men are FULL ON BULLYING THIS TEN YEAR OLD BOY GENIUS

so is this new shitty scientist consultant lucas a bigger annoyance than shitty train butler wizard jenkins or does jenkins still retain that title

travis: "anything this touches turns to crystal?" griffin: "yeah, pink tourmaline" travis: "yeah, I'm not gonna say that, because I'm an adult"

CAREY FANGBATTLE is like on par with Jess the Beheader in terms of Cool Names

griffin: “so the three of you are currently sitting in a gondola, which is another word for a little boat” travis, singing: “the more you knoooowww”

“so it’s made of crystal, right?” “yes, everything is crystal” x1000000

the crystal kingdom song is beautiful

griffin: “you see a sign that says The Magical World Of Elevators” justin: “griffin's really stickin it to the people who say he's not allowed to have elevators in this game”

today in failed brand marketing: “Upsy, your lifting friend”

this arc is ACTUALLY set up like a video game level puzzle, when griffin says “ah, you’ve solved my crystal puzzle” it will actually apply

clint: “I rolled a 4 but I get another roll...a 5″ travis: “wow, you're really bad at dnd”

merle: “I'm gonna use Banishment on the cockroach” griffin: “okay, you're just gonna yell GET OUT OF HERE COCKROACH, I DONT LOVE YOU ANYMORE”

magnus is being fucking mean to lucas, the genius inventor, and he’s been a TOTAL DICK to sweet boy genius detective angus macdonald, and i feel like pointing out that he was WAYYY nicer to shitty evil wizard train butler jenkins who beheaded a guy with a teleportation door

griffin: “one of the signs is labeled Radiation Ventilation Maintenance Chamber, and the other is labeled Lil Genius BuddyBot R&D" travis: "I feel like this is a trick” clint: “I feel like griffin has been playing Fallout”

I LOVE HODGE PODGE THE LIL GENIUS BUDDYBOT!!! EVEN IF HE TURNS OUT TO BE EVIL, THE SOUND OF HIS VOICE MADE ME LOVE HIM PRETTY INSTANTLY AND NOTHING CAN CHANGE THAT

hodge podge: “magnus! merle! take-o” goddamnit griffin

justin: “can we just put the stone of far speech in front of the robit and griffin, you can just talk to yourself?”

hodge podge is exactly the kind of unsettling demon robit with a mostly-adorable voice, except for when he goes demon-y, that I expected from griffy

justin: “my character taako has innate skills in: investigation, nature, history, religion, arcana, and religion” so is he double good at religion then

taako: “okay, I got a question for you: who....do we work for?”

lucas: “hey, are you just mean to everyone?” THANK GOD SOMEONE VOICED THIS LEGITIMATE FUCKING CONCERN, THE GRUBBY GRIFTERS ARE MONSTERS

clint: “I look up what scrumbled means” griffin: “justin said that in a Monster Factory once and I’ve been using it like it’s a real word” justin: “I am the lewis carroll of my generation”

noel the friendly medic robit’s voice started at vaguely-angus like and then became straight up country southern and i really hope somebody calls griffin on it

i really think griffin introduced the nitpicker so he could have a way of introducing his own critiques of his dad and brothers’ dnd skills

the little compact mirror has some shit in it that i think must be important

there’s a rift in space and time and pink tourmaline is coming out of it and the damn song is super ominous and making me MEGA NERVOUS and honestly i don’t know what the flying goddamn fuck is happening but i am SO INTO IT

lucas: “you’re just yelling hugbears at me” magnus: “BUG! HEARS!” “what” “what”

so is lucas just like holding these poor bugbears in fucking slavery

the grubby grifters discover the tourmalined body of boyland and magnus asked if he can DESECRATE THE GODDAMN BODY OF HIS TRAGICALLY DECEASED COWORKER

griffin: “these two figures are just taking these ice robits to Fool School”

awww they’re gonna fight one of my favorite little creepy crawlies! human sized tardigrades that will absolutely fuck their shit up!!! so cute

griffin: “you’re so loosey-goosey with your possessions! ‘hi scuddle-buddy! bye scuddle-buddy! go get on that train to hell!’”

clint/merle’s immediate panic when they decide the only option here is to CHOP HIS GODDAMN ARM OFF

killian, after picking lucas up: “THIS HAS BEEN THE WORST SHITTIEST DAY EVER, WE ARE TWO PEOPLE DOWN, YOUR LAB SUCKS!!” #relatable, I feel u killian

during this arc the mcelboys keep talking about how they don’t remember shit from the beginning of the show bc that was two years ago and im like what? what? that was three days ago, friends!! its bc ive binged this shit in under a WEEK

merle basically has a plant fetish okay, that’s the only reason this soul-wood shit worked

griffin: “it actually curls up and gives you a thumbs up as if to say 'hey! I'm your arm now!’”

so like this planar system shit is probably important, right

this parseltongue motherfucker that’s like fucking haunting the grubby grifters needs to start explaining what their whole, like, DEAL is

this Red Robe dude is having a FREAKOUT over the damn umbrella and im like mmmmm maybe taako shouldn’t have just taken the damn umbrella, no questions asked

killian’s scanner is having a major freakout over a lich being present and im like, yeah, its the fucking umbrella, yall

oh, real quick, the mcelboys gotta pause the action to whine at each other about character voices

killian: “I am going to ABSOLUTELY murder that man” yeah, killian remains the most goddamn relatable npc in this fucking world

i sure hope The Adventure Zone Zone doesn’t have any super important info in it, bc im not gonna listen to the mcelboys talk about the maxfun drive from two fucking years ago

the crystal golem just called the grubby grifters bounties, and said it was time for noelle the friendly medic robit and the grubby grifters to all go back to the astral plane and im like WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? GRIFFIN! WHAT?

OH FUCK ITS BEEN KRAVITZ THIS WHOLE GODDAMN TIME!!!!! KRAVITZ!!!!!

griffin: “a D6 is like a dice-ass-dice! that's like some monopoly shit!!”

kravitz: “i don’t even know how that even worked, like with physics”

taako: “luke! use the fork!” merle: “the fork will be with you, always”

magnus: “I want to roll an investigation check on noelle...I rolled a 2″ griffin: “okay well you know noelle is a robot”

YALL!! SHITTY TRAIN BUTLER WIZARD JENKINS AND MAGIC BRIAN THE GERMAN MORON BOTH CAME BACK!!

magic brian the german dumbass: “i had an invitation to my wedding for you, and instead of RSVP-ing, you murdered me!”

travis: “when you say they evaporate, do they go back to heaven or hell or the after plane, or whatever, or are they GONE?” griffin: “it kinda seems like you obliterated their soul. kinda seems like you just kinda ERASED them” travis: “you know, at the end of day, I punch people, but dad unmakes their existence, who's the real monster?”

the fact that noelle died in phandolin when the grubby grifters and gundren rockseeker turned the whole town to glass is so goddamn fucking tragic, THANKS GRIFFIN!!!!

lucas miller: yet more proof that dickin around with science and magic and mad scientist shit is always gonna end badly for everyone

kravitz: “taako, you’ve died eight times”...[...]..”magnus, you’ve died 19 times”...[...]...”merle highchurch, the richest bounty i have ever hunted, you have died 57 times” WHAT?? WHAT? WHAT???? WHAT???? GRIFFIN!!??? WHAT????

THIS STORYLINE IS LIT

griffin: “a legion of ghosts” justin: “great”

i think both griffin and I have forgotten that carey fangbattle and killian are in this scene. also merle has had a soul-bond wood arm this whole time

the grubby grifters beat a goddamn LEGION of ghost robits, or ghrobits, and then kravitz slides back into the scene all like “uh, hey, assholes, thanks for saving me, I’ll make up some legal loophole bullshit to thank you” that’s not a direct quote, that’s me editorializing. i fucking love kravitz

taako: "they found new bodies, just because they're mechanical doesn't mean the life is any less valid - battlestar galactica"

oh fuck magnus got a cheating deck of cards in like episode goddamn THREE and he just whips em out in episode fucking 39 against kravitz

kravitz, massively misunderstanding the assholes he’s talking to: “the rules of nature are there for a reason, so lets just stop running afoul of them, as if this all just funsy-fun make-believe!”

magnus: “kravitz! tell julia I love her” TRAVIS!!!! TRAVIS MCELROY! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO MY HEART!!!

lucas: “you'll never see me again, but if you do, i'll be doing good, and please don't kill me instantly”

justin: “i give angus a thumbs down” motherfuckers

killian: “hell yes! I love this plan! me and carey, and a robot ghost with a gun arm! sounds like a plan!” magnus: “sounds like a spinoff!” killian: “that’s sounds like some torchwood shit!”

davenport the goddamn pokemon

on one hand, I’m really goddamn suspicious that the director isn’t actually destroying the relics but is collecting them for her own gain. but on the other hand, if this turns out to not be true, I will feel bad for suspecting her so hard

taako: “director, here’s the truth. what did you have for lunch on Dec 3 2015? you don’t remember right? that’s when you told us not to talk to the Red Robes. what’s I’m saying is WE FORGOT!”

YOOO THIS EPILOGUE PROPHECY IS SOOOOOOO COOOOOL GRIFFIN!!! WHAT IS THIS!!!! ITS SO GOOD!!!!!!

this was a wild wild wild wild ride and whatever griffin is doing with this story is LIT

[thecinemaelite]

Since I’ve gotten many people telling me to play the new God of War game, I have finally succumbed to the peer pressure. Of course, since I’m a connoisseur of narrative storytelling, I decided to play the previous six games as well since I’ve never played any God of War games in my life. So, here are my retrospective thoughts on the franchise as a whole, and collective reviews for all seven games that currently exist (excluding the side-scrolling phone app game. I’m not that desperate for entertainment).

God of War HD (2005)

  Played on: PlayStation Now

Time to Beat: 8h 41m

MetaScore: 94 Critic / 89 User

My Rating: 8/10

So, an “80%” is not the first grade that came to mind while playing this game. At the beginning, I loved the gameplay and plot but while the story stayed pretty top-notch, the gameplay suffered severe quality fluctuations. Given that this game is 13 years old, functionality and fluidity are critiqued with bias but I can say this fairly objectively: parts of this game are relentlessly frustrating. There are sections where ultimate surgical precision must be maintained by the player, but not by the game. By that I mean that you’ll have to weave between dangers but the “hit boxes” for these dangers are far from exact: this game and its controls are often clunky but at the same time, you’re asked for perfection which makes many aspects of this game simple lucky coin flips. I also appreciated the camera work at times but at other times, it seemed like the absolute stupidest idea in gaming history. The variety of angles is “cool,” but often troublesome and easily substitutable for a simple third person close follow camera type. Artistic, not practical (which is a good way to describe a lot of the mechanics) which is a trait that breeds annoyance almost consistently. Either way, if you have the patience and interest in going back to play this game, I don’t think you’ll be disappointed with the overall experience.

2. God of War II (2007)

  Played on: PlayStation Now

Time to Beat: 8h 44m

MetaScore: 93 Critic / 89 User

My Rating: 8/10

The first game I thought was a fantastic story burdened by clunky mechanics that turned parts of gameplay into outright chores but this game was almost the opposite: a smooth game without as impressive a narrative. I never really wanted to beat the game in order to see what became of my playing, but rather to beat the game in order to move onto the next one. Instead of this rags-to-riches plot that made the first so compelling, this is just a revenge tale that plays pretty much the same. Don’t get me wrong, I loved the game but before I go into my positives, I thought I’d get the negatives out of the way beforehand. So, let’s move on to the good parts: damn this game was fun. The added scale and spectacle truly made this feel epic mostly in the sequences that allowed you to fly Pegasus, climb up Titans, and just prove that you are the God of War and not just a soldier of death. Being able to fight Zeus and feel like you’re able to kick his ass given the work you’ve done to upgrade your attacks and weapons was extremely fulfilling. The puzzles weren’t nearly as puzzling but being able to sprint through them just sort of added to the power I felt at the controls of our anti-hero. It’s a ton of fun, that much I can’t deny. Flying with the wings of Icarus was also an added bonus which brings me to my favorite and least favorite parts of the game: the lore it swims, and sometimes drowns, in. Look, it’s really great to interact with Greek gods, Titans, and other creatures of lore but sometimes I thought that the game would have benefitted from re-writing some of these elements. Mainly, 10-arm 10-boobed Great Uncle Ugly that you have to beat towards the end. That was more offputting and disgusting than threatening and I wanted to get it over with more than I did want to feel accomplished by beating him. It’s still a great experience and I enjoyed it slightly more than the first, the mechanics were the most cherished improvement.

3. God of War: Chains of Olympus (2008)

  Played on: PlayStation Now

Time to Beat: 3h 13m

MetaScore: 91 Critic / 86 User

My Rating: 5/10

I’m not too sure what I expected from this entry, I suppose that the main reason for this game’s existence is to re-introduce this series to players who would like to play more of the same thing they’ve been playing. Instead of at home, though, it’s on the go. Chains is really just rehashing the least epic portions of the first two games. Honestly, how many times am I going to have to level up the same damn blades? It’s like this character has memory loss and I gotta retrain him every few months. I get that this is a prequel but there are many ways to still have made it more unique. This game is just like the first game minus the God battles. And the final boss? We meet the character RIGHT before we have to fight her, it’s the biggest left-field random “surprise” and I couldn’t help but roll my eyes— the final ending just feels tacked on last-minute. There’s not too much else to say, it doesn’t feel fresh but if you like God of War then this will most likely please you. Or, you’re like me who likes the first two games but this one felt like getting a hair in my salad.

4. God of War: Ghost of Sparta (2010)

  Played on: PlayStation Now

Time to Beat: 4h 08m

MetaScore: 86 Critic / 85 User

My Rating: 9/10

Without a doubt, this is my favorite of the four God of War games I’ve played so far. To me, this is a near perfect edition of the God of War style and mechanics, and adding a great story on top of it. Full of epic moments, thrills, chills, action, drama, and deep character relationships, Ghost of Sparta amazed me around every turn…and this was a PSP to PS3 port? That’s even more amazing. The visuals and gameplay were better than the PS2 games for sure and I can’t wait to see what III and Ascension offer after this amazing entry. Really, my only problems have been problems with the other games as well: the chests, the inability to load single chapters, and the confusing bonuses. The chests are absolutely ridiculous even still, especially when you’re fighting and need to open one right next to you but it flashes different colors so you have to wait for the right one, and hope that you don’t get hit in the meantime. It’s not a skill-based mechanic, it’s a cheap tactic that absolutely needs to disappear. The inability to load earlier chapters bugs me as well because to go back to get just one Gorgon Eye that you missed means replaying the ENTIRE campaign over again which, again, is cheap. It definitely ruins any replayability and so far, this would be the one God of War game I’d go back to play for shits and giggles. Lastly, the confusing bonuses… there are some things I grabbed throughout the campaign that told me I’d have to beat the game to use. Upon completion of the game, nothing in the menus at all gave any hint on how to use these items. I started up a new game and was able to choose my outfit but I still couldn’t figure out how to use these relics, so I just turned it off and decided to write this review before moving onto the next game.

5. God of War III Remastered (2010)

  Played on: PlayStation Now

Time to Beat: 9h 26m

MetaScore: 92 Critic / 88 User

My Rating: 9/10

There are so many aspects of this game that have been greatly improved upon in comparison to the games that came before it. For one, it’s graphically gorgeous. I played the Remastered version so that may have helped a little bit but either way, the epicness of the game was achieved due almost exclusively to the graphics that helped sell it. This was also the first game that I played on Normal difficulty since the first game. The clunky controls of the earlier entries infuriated me and I played on Easy simply to finish the game as fast as possible (the only real reason I’m playing any of these is because I want to go into God of War IV knowing as much of the backstory as possible), and playing this on normal kicked my ass a few times. Because of this, I had to be much more careful with my attacks, timing, and maneuvers which inherently makes you more invested in the game and character. So, this might not be an objective statement due to the difficulty change but I did feel like this game was more of a challenge which made it slightly more fun, and definitely more rewarding. On the other hand, this game was a lot more gruesome… like, a lot. Almost disgustingly so, at times, as blood would literally cover the screen. Of course, this doesn’t necessarily bother me but as this was the first HD-feeling game, the first graphical change that I noticed was the gallons of blood erupting from every enemy. It was slightly offputting but honestly, did a lot to help sell the legendary fantastical nature of a game revolving around the God of War. Probably my favorite aspect of the game was when you could pick up and use artifacts from the gods and demi-gods that you killed. Whenever you take down one of these mythological characters, you assume some of their powers which was a design that made every few chapters feel extremely fresh (something that was desperately needed after binge-playing all of these games in less than 2 weeks). The final boss fight was another element of the game that changed-up the God of War- fighting paradigm by making it extremely reminiscent of Mortal Kombat (see above image). The hack-and-slash followed by rapid button-mash nature of the boss fights have grown a little slate so having a boss fight in this new style was more than welcome. Overall, I don’t think this game has quite the intimate character-driven story of Ghost of Sparta but it makes up for it in its epic finality which offered a lot of fun, fresh, and exciting gameplay elements.

6. God of War: Ascension (2013)

  Played on: PlayStation Now

Time to Beat: 8h 22m

MetaScore: 80 Critic / 76 User

My Rating: 8/10

Ascension is (yet another) game that takes place before a previous game and because of that, the stakes don’t feel as high since we’ve seen the world of the future. However, Ascension manages to take that basic prequelitis disease and make it exciting. Of course, he is not a god (yet) so he doesn’t have the ability to use all of the magic and powers that he has in the other games, but we were still able to experiment with godlike abilities through artifacts and assistance. Since this takes place before he decides to hunt down and kill Ares, he’s still on the good side of every God, using their abilities at times to aid him in battle. However, the most beneficial tools that we were able to use were just basic items, giving us a taste at how good of a warrior Kratos is, when he can’t rely on the powers of the gods. Aside from that, the story was okay; it definitely didn’t do anything to impress me until the very end as it seems to be more of the same yet again (instead of battling the Sisters of Fate, it’s now the sisters of Fury. Another four letter “f” word…darn) and honestly, I didn’t know WHY I was doing a lot of the things that I was doing. Go here, fight them, swing there, fix this, do that, yadda yadda yadda but the upgraded mechanics and gorgeous visuals made the dead-horse ride much less of a chore. Like the other games, this one also called upon you to use the directional pad in order to change weapons but Ascension did things slightly differently by having each directional button give you a different elemental power to use (Zeus’ lightning, Hades’ souls, Poseidon’s ice, and Ares’ fire) in order to make the mechanics familiar but offer something new. There were a few things that infuriated me about the updated combat mechanics, though, and one of them was the Rage Meter. I liked the general idea of it but in practice, it was rarely used and felt nearly useless. Another thing that I despised was how the Quick Time Events worked. When you attack an enemy until they’re ready for a Finishing Move, grappling them will execute one of four things: a button-mash, a QTE, a fighting mini-game, or a death animation. I like all of these in theory, but since you never knew which one you were going to get, sometimes you’d prepare for the wrong one and then die because you didn’t get a warning. For QTEs specifically, the button demand was excruciatingly random. I love little details like QTE demands being mapped to button commands that make sense, such as X for jump. In Ascension, that’s not the case. There’s no skill involved in the QTEs and it took the fun out of playing those sections…especially because it’s the very last thing you do. One of the reasons that Halo 4 was so painfully underwhelming is because the game ended with a QTE boss fight, for the first time in the series. Ascension is full of those (like the other God of War games) but the reason I hate them so much is that the buttons they ask you to press often don’t make sense. That being said, the fighting minigames were stellar and I really hope to see more things like that instead of QTEs in the 2018 game. Other than that, there were a lot of aspects of this game that I loved a lot more than the other games. First, the voice acting. I’ve never been a huge fan of the quality of voice acting of Kratos but it was perfected in this game and I can really tell that the actor’s skills have improved greatly. Second, the puzzles. There were a lot more puzzles in this game that really made you think about what you were doing and what needs doing (and in what order) which felt a little (way) too much like Uncharted but given that this is the sixth game in the series, a little fresh air was more than welcome. On some levels, I’d finish a puzzle and walk past a chest before opening a door (planning to go back to the chest) but instead, the door would close behind me and the chest was lost. That’s an over exaggerated example but there were at least half a dozen times in which events close to that happened, frustrating me to all hell. Twice, I even purposefully killed myself in order to load the last checkpoint but it would instead take me past where I wanted to be. Either way, it didn’t harm the game too much (aside from the fact that I was 2000 red orbs away from a trophy for unlocking all of Kratos’ upgrades) and I still had a lot of fun. I’d say it’s in my top 3 GoW campaigns so far and although it was quite different, it was a lot of fun as well.

7. God of War (2018)

  Played on: PlayStation 4

Time to Beat: 31h 53m

MetaScore: 94 Critic / 92 User

My Score: 10/10

God of War IV is nothing short of absolute perfection, and an immense improvement on the previous games in the series. This Norse God of War game breathes new life into the franchise, taking not only an entire mythological history and swapping it for another but also switching up the gameplay, style, aesthetic, and changing the very nature of the old hack-and-slash platformers that these games are known for being. Of course, pieces of the game are still reminiscent of the old style but for all intents and purposes, this is a new type of GoW game altogether… and it’s beautiful. My biggest gripes with the other games are now not in the series at all anymore: the helpful health, magic, and rage chests alternating between what they offer: gone. The tedious button-mashing to defeat bosses, open doors, and any other interactable objects: gone. In exchange, God of War IV dilutes those elements or replaces them completely. Sure, there are small stones that may change color depending on what they offer but by no means are they the only source of that object and really, are almost entirely missable. Button-mashing is only in the game less than a dozen times and it’s also mostly avoidable, or completely necessary to put you in Kratos’ shoes (as far as effort goes). While not open world, the map is large and explorable, spanning out from the center like a spider’s web. In this way, it would be most accurate to draw comparisons to Rise of the Tomb Raider or Bioshock where there are not “levels” to progress through the story, but chapters that take place in different areas that can be accessed at any time. In aesthetic, though, comparisons between this game and Skyrim, Middle-Earth, The Witcher or Dragon Age can be drawn as they revolve around a slightly more medieval-fantasy genre. Really, calling this game “Rise of the Tomb Raider meets Skyrim” would be a great way to look at this game as a whole. The other GoW games took you from point A to B to C, and so on. This game, on the other hand, lays out A-Z all at the same time and you get to decide which letter you approach first. From there, A2, A3, A4, and other sections of each letter can be unlocked, if that analogy makes sense. It’s not quite a “play your way” sort of story but the kind of variations and customizations that are offered astounded me, and I still can’t stop playing. The map is very large but I do have a few problems with it. For one, some sections of it are quite maze-like. Since it’s a spider-web shape, you have to follow trails to get between certain sections which means if you want to travel to a different area, you’d have to trek through the trails and are unable to find shortcuts. For example, I wanted to beat the Valkyrie in The Mountains but the Yggdrasil door closest to it took me to a spot 1400m away: above where I wanted to be. The map has no apparent depth when looking at it from above and not being able to rotate it or change perspective became troublesome at times. That is probably the biggest thing I would change as it slowed down my gameplay quite a bit. That being said, my problems with the map stop after Midgard and since there are 5 other realms to explore (all smaller) the problems are mostly limited to that realm. Niflheim, Muspeilheim, Helheim, and Alfheim are all explorable and each offers their own unique perks, challenges, and areas to devote your time to. The best part: you could play the game without even venturing once into two of those places which end up serving as a complete bonus for players who wanted to experience more of the worlds Santa Monica built for us. Speaking of the developers: this game has, by far, the best story of any game I’ve played in a very long time. The action and emotion are both astronomically impacting and both aspects make the experience as a whole entirely unmatched. The voice acting as well has been vastly improved; Kratos is no longer a sort of eye-rolling dialoguist but now is a rusted poet full of heart and buried emotion. It truly was a heartbreaking, heartwarming, and mesmerizing experience following Kratos and Atreus on this journey. The characters were also one of the strongest points by far. Kratos and Atreus, Brok and Sindri, Mimir, Freya, Baldur, and everybody else were just so well written and portrayed; there wasn’t a single flat character in the game. The heroes, as well as villains, were extremely deep and emotional, all containing arcs and stories that are impossible not to be invested in. Brok and Sindri are the best comic relief I’ve ever encountered in a video game, Baldur is one of the most brilliantly conflicted villains, Kratos is helplessly badass and magnetic, and Atreus should have his own game series as well. Honestly, there’s nothing not to like about this masterpiece. I could go on for hours but I think I’ve sold this game enough and just hope that just one single person out there who hasn’t played this game is reading this review is now convinced to give it a try, I’ve succeeded. Borrow it from a friend, rent it, buy it, however you can. Scrape pennies out of the couch and call in your favors: God of War IV is the must-play game of the year.

Series Retrospective & Overall Thoughts

As of writing this sentence, I’ve put 88 hours and 12 minutes into the God of War franchise, with nearly 46 of those being from the most recent entry…which is more than half of my total time playing them. What started as a simple assignment (beat the campaigns, write the reviews) became an emotional investment. I’ve grown to love this series even though many of the titles were quite repetitive as they started asking you to do the same things over and over again. The first six games had their ups and downs, wavering in quality of story and visuals whilst requiring ungodly amounts of button mashing but then came 2018’s God of War which blew everything out of the water. How this game reinvented the franchise astounds me for a few reasons, one of which I have been saving for this section of the post: I played six God of War games in two weeks and the final game was the most satisfying. Yes, they started to feel stale to me after the second game but the new God of War is something so fresh and so new that it felt like something completely different (in the best ways).

As mentioned in the individual reviews, the games started to get stale (especially Chains of Olympus which offered neither a fresh story or gameplay experience). Ghost of Sparta gave us an amazing tale, III offered the most epic visuals, and Ascension gave us the best gameplay. III stood out to me for it’s Mortal Kombat boss fight, Ascension for it’s Uncharted-style, and God of War IV felt like Tomb Raider meets Skyrim. The strength of this franchise has become its variation. As we’ve seen with the LEGO games, the Guitar Hero games, and most recently, the Call of Duty games, audiences will turn on a franchise if it stops reinventing itself. God of War has managed to avoid that because it’s not afraid to change up its pace. I can’t thank creative director Cory Barlog enough for his decision to do just that.

The longest franchise I’ve played in the past is Halo (Combat Evolved, Halo 2, Halo 3, ODST, Reach, and 4) but I never played them consecutively as I did these games. So, it makes sense how this series when played religiously back-to-back may get old but to then have the last game be the most time consuming yet inventive and beautiful was such a treat. If I ever go back and play the God of War games again, I’ll likely simply stick with this new one. If anything, maybe play Ghost of Sparta since it was one of my favorites, or III and Ascension since they were visually appealing, but I’d be robbing myself by playing a God of War game and not have it be this most recent one.

Games Ranked

Ranking titles is one of the most challenging tasks for myself as I constantly remember aspects of one while forgetting aspects of another and then juggling which parts mean more to me but as far as overall experience goes, I think this order satisfies my tastes fairly well.

God of War (2018)

God of War III

Ghost of Sparta

Ascension

God of War II

God of War

Chains of Olympus

All of these games were really enjoyable (aside from Chains which I thought was a pretty boring experience) and even though ranking them may seem like the games down the list are of low quality but don’t let that fool you: all are worth playing.

What Order to Play In

If you’re like I was, and are interested in getting into the God of War games, I’ve thought of the best way to play them in. Since they were released out of chronology but certain stories reference others, playing in either release order or chronological order can be problematic. So, here is the order that I recommend:

God of War

Chains of Olympus (if you want)

Ghost of Sparta

God of War II

God of War III

Ascension

God of War (2018)

The reasoning for this is that Ascension takes place first but references III and has better graphics than all of the other games, and while the PSP games were released between II and III instead of I and II, playing them out of order allows you to play II and III back-to-back which is what I wish I would have done as they lead into the next game seamlessly.

Future Hopes

Without a doubt, I want Santa Monica to continue what they’ve done with this newest title. The tone, story, scale, open-world flavor, side quests, characters, and general aesthetic of this Norse-themed reinvention needs to continue. I’d love to go to the other realms that weren’t explored in GoW4, I’d love to see what happens with a few characters whose future roles were teased, and I absolutely need to see the rest of Kratos’ days as the Greek God of War.

The text in the following paragraph is full of spoilers, I recommend skipping past that paragraph if you don’t want to or already know these things.

I want to see Freya take up her previous role as the Valkyrie Queen for Odin, and set out on a path of vengeance against Kratos and Atreus. Maybe Loki has a brief or extended stint on Asgard’s side and Kratos has to battle Freya and the Asgardians alone during Ragnarok. There are so many options for what could happen in a sequel, and one of the largest plots I can think of is Kratos vs. Thor since Atreus’ reveal as Loki has a history of interacting with Thor and Odin. Although, more father-son drama may start to feel repetitive.

Cory Balrog and the rest of the Santa Monica team said that since this game took 5 years to build from the ground up, the next games wouldn’t take nearly as long and they have quite a few more stories up their sleeves. Time couldn’t move fast enough in order for me to play these games as soon as I’d like to.

Anyways, I think that’ll do it for my God of War Series Review! I hope you enjoyed yourself and as always, thanks for reading and I’ll see you soon!

God of War: Series Review Since I've gotten many people telling me to play the new God of War game, I have finally succumbed to the peer pressure.

[classicfilmfreak]

New Post has been published on http://www.classicfilmfreak.com/2017/06/08/secret-incas-1954-charlton-heston/

Secret of the Incas (1954) with Charlton Heston

Marrying Doc is my one chance … Don’t kiss it away for me, Harry … please … please … please … Long considered almost a lost film as it was so hard to find, 1954’s Secret of the Incas presents a mixed bag. For many years there were unfounded rumors that Steven Spielberg had blocked any release of the picture on DVD or other means, given that supposedly the Raiders of the Lost Ark series was inspired directly from it.

Since then the film has become slightly more available, though it’s still not anything you can grab from amazon. Though I’ve had a copy for quite a while, I’ve never had the inclination to watch it. Well that’s changed and along with it has come an epiphany on why the picture isn’t everywhere you may like it to be. Frankly, it isn’t that good.

It’s clear that there are some similarities between the two pictures, which have been acknowledged by some of the folks who worked on Raiders. Charlton Heston as the protagonist Harry Steele in Secret of the Incas is clearly the physical inspiration for Indiana Jones as he’s complete with fedora, leather bomber jacket and shoulder bag. Outside of this and one good scene towards the end which intimately mirrors the great map room scene in Raiders where Harrison Ford bends light to locate the resting place of the Ark, the similarities are few.

So that aside, what’s this Incan story? As mentioned, Charlton Heston is the lead as Harry Steele, a money driven artifact thief and borderline shyster. Most of the time he loiters at the airport in Cusco, Peru waiting for incoming flights. He meets these posing as a tour guide to innocent tourists, goading them to hire him to show them the local museum. It’s clear really early on that he’ll do most anything for a buck and that his first and second priorities are Harry Steele, in that order.

One evening he comes across Ed Morgan (Thomas Mitchell) in the hotel bar shooting pool. Ed’s even further removed from the law than Harry, but his better days are behind him as age and drinking have caught up with him. (As an aside, why must Thomas Mitchell always play a drunk?) Ed wants to steal a gold and bejeweled Sunburst which was stolen from the Incas generations ago. Harry declines to work with Ed on locating and stealing the relic, but decides to find it for himself.

During on of his tours, Harry learns the location of the Sunburst, but it’s too far to travel with his limited resources. About the same time Elena (Nicole Maurey) comes to Cusco, looking to escape her pursuers and flee to the United States. Though it’s never explained why she is being chased, Harry realized that the gent who is chasing has a plane, so after meeting her and duping her just a bit they steal the plane and head to Machu Picchu to find the Sunburst.

Once at Machu Picchu, they find an archaeological dig underway being led by Stanley Moorehead (Robert Young in his last screen role). It’s here that things finally pick up a bit of speed, though it comes at a price.

That price, hard to say, is the singing of Yma Sumac, known for her five octave singing range. Presented onscreen as Peruvian folk music, her performances (and there are several here) are not for the faint of heart. Whether they are authentic or not, they’re fluff at best and a detraction from the picture (which is saying something) at worst. That said, some few find these sections among the best of the film.

Perhaps the biggest challenge of Secret of the Incas is that for the bulk of the picture things seem to happen in slow motion. The only excitement and action happen well after the dynamic duo of Elena and Harry get to the dig site. Directed by Jerry Hopper, who left pictures in 1956 for the small screen, there’s not much life on film. The cast, which has a few stars, seem lost and lackluster in what could be better roles. Especially early on, there’s some especially good dialogue which shows potential but is handled poorly. There’s great banter between Steele and one of his smitten female tour customers in addition to the interchange where he meets Elena at the bar:

Elena: Mr. Steele, Harry Steele? Man at Bar: Well, does the name really matter? Harry: Yes, because my name is Steele, and I’m bigger than you.

Later on the dialogue becomes shallow and bland, almost as if the scriptwriters themselves gave up.

The characters are flat with no development throughout. We never find out why Elena’s on the run nor why Stanley makes his sudden proposal. In the end we really don’t care perhaps. Steele, the one character who (perhaps including Mitchell’s Ed Morgan) does show potential, makes an abrupt change of character in the last scene. So is Steele really the low level con-man we met an hour or so earlier cruising the Cusco airport? Who knows.

The love story between Elena and Harry never feels like it clicks and Nicole Maurey and Charlton Heston have little chemistry, though their relationship is definitely in better shape than the almost father-daughter one she has with Robert Young.

At the end of the day, Secret of the Incas is a roughly typical picture for the day, with nothing to make it worse than that. Yes, it has some stars and a lineage which ties it vaguely to one of Hollywood’s most successful franchises, but at the end of the day it’s exceedingly typical. It’s clear a good deal of the picture was filmed on location in Peru which is definitely a rarity for the time, but the portions which were filmed on soundstages are equally obvious- just watch the grass.

While it’s clear that Harry Steele’s wardrobe inspired the later Indiana Jones, it’s hard to take the inspiration farther. Indiana is an archaeologist who says relics should be in museums, whereas Steele clearly thinks they should be sold with the proceeds going into his pockets. While Jones fights Nazi’s in two of his pictures, one imagines Steele might have been open to working for them had the price been right like Belloq did in Raiders. Then again, Steele couldn’t do that either as he isn’t an archaeologist.

Luckily with today’s technology at least you can skip the performances of Yma Sumac, so things can’t be that bad.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20TAGRElvfE

[mcnaughton]

Abandoning Hope -- Some Thoughts on Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

*NOTE: I wrote this the day after seeing Rogue One at the cinema. I don't do FB, so I posted it to my neglected G+ and linked to Twitter ( twitter.com/drewmcnaughton ). Every few years I remember I have a Tumblr, so I'm sharing it here 6 months later. Also, to correct the opening sentence, I did not see R1 again in theaters, making it the first live action Star Wars movie I've ever only seen once on the big screen. Enjoy....... Original Post 12/16/16 ( https://plus.google.com/108163877778963936170/posts/TUqccQPVkzf ) I will see Rogue One again while it is still at the cinema. That isn't really saying much since I saw Phantom Menace five times during the summer of 1999, back when I had way more time on my hands and George Lucas was only in his first phase of ruining my childhood. Today at work, I told people who knew I saw it last night that if they like Star Wars, then Rogue One is worth seeing, and if they had seen all of them, then they had already seen worse Star Wars movies as well as much better ones (among which I would include The Force Awakens). I did not really know what to expect walking into Rogue One as I had read no spoilers other than there would be no opening crawl (real spoilers will follow below). While I was looking forward to seeing it, it was the least excited I had ever been for a new Star Wars movie (I was 4 years old when Jedi premiered, and the Emperor's force lightning torture of Luke was too much for my little mind to handle). I identified at least two reasons for my lack of enthusiasm: it would not move the saga forward nor would it likely answer long pondered questions since in at least a general sense we already know what happens because it is literally spelled out for us in the opening title crawl of the original Star Wars. Also, we just got a new Star Wars a year ago. I probably will be much more excited for Episode VIII next year, but it is also possible that the House of Mouse Star Wars saturation is already taking its toll. ***Spoilers below, you've been warned*** I walked away from Rogue One with mixed feelings. I did not enjoy it as much as I did last year's The Force Awakens. This is largely due to Rogue One’s paper thin characters. I don’t dislike Jyn or the Captain guy. The blind Jedi inspired warrior and his brick shithouse companion are fun. I especially got a huge kick out of blind Chirrut (I had to Google his name because I honestly could not remember it) saying "May the Force of Others Be With You" and his reference to the Whills, both of which are ancient relics of the earliest drafts of The Star Wars by Lucas (I highly recommend The Star Wars comic book miniseries that brings the rough draft to life; it isn't exactly what I'd characterize as a good story, but it is a fascinating look at from what Star Wars evolved, as well as how certain elements emerged decades later in the prequels, for better or worse). But the only character I really cared about was the droid K-2S0. He dies. They all die. That was fairly predictable. But only K-2S0's sacrifice made me even somewhat emotional. The Captain is a one note character, and while I embrace the diversity on display in these new Star Wars films, I honestly had a difficult time understanding some of his dialogue due at least in part to the character’s (or actor’s) accent. Then there is Jyn, who goes from not really caring about the Rebellion (or anything for that matter) to preaching about "hope" to Mon Mothma almost immediately after her father is killed, seemingly turning on a dime in terms of her character’s motivation. This character’s shift is less convincing than Anakin's turn to the Dark Side. I cared less about Jyn after 2+ hours than I did about Rey in her first couple of minutes on screen in The Force Awakens while scavenging the crashed Star Destroyer, hocking her goods, and making her portion of space bread. Maybe it was a difference in the quality of the acting, the script writing, or both. The absense of characters in whom I am emotionally invested is a big problem I have in fully embracing Rogue One. Not caring about the characters is largely what sank the prequels, especially The Phantom Menace (though to be fair, I really liked Ewan McGregor’s performance in Attack of the Clones because he seemed to be having fun with the role, and even Hayden Christensen had a few shining moments about midway through Revenge of the Sith where I actually felt his inner turmoil). Speaking of which, Darth Vader is in Rogue One and it is pretty awesome. We see his lava planet castle, based on old conceptual art for Empire Strikes Back, I believe. Most of the planets in Rogue One are identified by title cards. This one is not, though I assumed it was Mustafar and I'm sure that will be confirmed or denied through some official Star Wars sanctioned means if it hasn't already. I absolutely love the planet Jedha, with the relics of the last remaining Jedi temple and fallen statues that are very much in the spirit of the Lord of the Rings films (think The Argonath from Fellowship of the Ring). Pretty much everything that happens on this planet are my favorite parts of the movie. I'm getting slightly ahead of myself here though. The film opens with a somewhat cliched scene of young Jyn seeing the murder of her mother and abduction of her father by the Imperial bad guy who needs help finishing the construction of the Death Star. It is notable that the mother is wearing clothing very similar to the Jedi robes in the prequels that were also worn by common Tatooine folks in A New Hope and Return of the Jedi. She also is the bearer of a Kyber Crystal, which have long been known to be the power element for both Jedi/Sith lightsabers as well as the Death Star's main weapon, though never acknowledged on film until now. We then flash forward to Jyn in an imperial jail. It is at this point that I really started to worry about Rogue One because in the next 10 minutes, we visit at least 4 different planets, and I started to wonder if the film was heading into a narrative nightmare not witnessed since David Lynch's Dune (which, in full disclosure, I absolutely love, though I'd never try to convince anyone that it is actually a good movie). Fortunately it does not (although perhaps Rogue One would be far more memorable if it was a complete disaster of a film rather than one that is just somewhat off its mark). As I write this, it has been about 24 hours since I saw Rogue One, and that brief, messy stretch of the film is mostly a blur in my mind, but at its outset, Jyn is going to help the Rebels find Saw Gerrera played by Ghost Dog himself Forest Whitaker because plot reasons.. That leads to the terrific sequences on Jedha. The film is worth seeing for these alone. In The Force Awakens, Han Solo stated that Luke Skywalker went in search of the last Jedi temple. Perhaps what we see on Jedha will come into play in next year's Episode VIII, or perhaps not. There was no teaser for Episode VIII before or after Rogue One. Then a bunch of stuff happens: Jyn's dad dies, we see Tarkin which is cool, and we see some other OT characters, some of whom's cameos are clever, while others are shameless fan service and pandering. And then we get to the film's third act, which has been what most people who have seen and enjoyed Rogue One have pointed to as its highlight. Frankly, I was underwhelmed. Again, I got a little emotional when the droid K-2S0 is killed protecting Jyn and Captain guy. Many of the more iconic images from the film's trailers didn't even make into the final cut of this sequence (which calls into question the apparent validity of the rumors of the production being troubled). I did not hate this extended sequence, but this is the first time in any Star Wars movie where I was not fully engaged in the epic battle. Yes, that includes the ones in the prequels. I did really like when Darth Vader's Star Destroyer popped up to thwart any sense of pure victory the Rebels may have felt after capturing the Death Star plans. Then we see Princess Leia, obviously a special effect, and she lightspeeds away on the Tantave IV into the opening shot of Episode IV. This all calls into question why The House of Mouse felt compelled to make this movie. Well, the answer is simple, to continue to make "a shitload of money" (to quote Lone Star from Spaceballs) off of their $4 billion investment. But why this story? My guess is that the powers that be recognized that Revenge of the Sith’s attempt to tie directly into the beginning of A New Hope failed miserably, largely because of the 20 year gap in the saga timeline between the two films. This is probably why they went with Princess Leia at the end of Rogue One and not Artoo and Threepio, since we already saw them on the Tantave IV in one of the last shots in Episode III. There's a lot of unaccounted for events on the Star Wars timeline, especially in light of the abandonment of the Extended Universe (which was fine by me because most of those novels and comic books were really dumb) and the introduction of new characters, concepts and entities in The Force Awakens. Maybe years from now (or much sooner) we'll get to see the Battle of Jaku on the big screen in another standalone film. I would have preferred that to what we get in Rogue One. Some of my specific nitpicks, such as how can the X- and U-Wings destroy the AT-ATs when in Empire Strikes Back their "armor is too strong for blasters", I've already found answers to -- according to Den Of Geek, these are actually AT-ACTs, designed for cargo, not combat ( http://www.denofgeek.com/us/movies/star-wars/260771/star-wars-rogue-one-easter-eggs-and-reference-guide ). My brother picked up on some other nitpicks, particularly how the end of Rogue One and the beginning of A New Hope don't exactly match up ( https://t.co/q881t4Jr5e ). I'm sure more of those will occur to the collective Star Wars community as time goes by and second, third and perhaps fourth theatrical viewings occur. *****END SPOILERS**** Look, when new Star Wars (and also Star Trek) movies are released, I am tense when I see them the first time because I am anxiously waiting for them to start sucking. There is an unfortunate precedent for that for these two franchises. In the last year, I enjoyed both The Force Awakens and Star Trek Beyond way more on subsequent viewings than I did the first times. In the case of Rogue One, it stumbles out of the gate, then thrives during the Jedha sequences, and finally settles in as a B-/C+ grade Star Wars film. There is a chance I might like it even less when I see it again, but I might also find more to appreciate. I've seen the worst Star Wars and Star Trek films at least several dozen times each, and the best ones hundreds if not thousands of times (no exaggeration…. I wore out my VHS copies of Star Wars, Empire, Wrath of Khan, Search for Spock and The Voyage Home as a kid). I'll see Rogue One again. I even look forward to it. I just HOPE I find something more to like about it.