#but it's worrying how little some people want to think about things like money mental health physical etc before having kids
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korusalka · 5 months ago
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#saw a friend today who decided on having kids now that she's getting married to her longtime boyfriend#i deeply appreciate that friend but i never got on board with how she speaks so matter-of-factly of having a baby#bc she believes she 'owes' her significantly older bf#another motivation seems to be that she just wants to be done with her job and become a sahm (crossong myself)#also shes annoyed by other kids but bought into the idea that 'it's different once they're yours'#well yeah for life and death reasons not because your child suddenly becomes a ray of sunshine 24/7#idk idk i see how she could manage somehow but she gets easily overwhelmed and dissatisfied as it is&says she doesn't have any savings so.#hm. worried.#also wanting to become pregnant to have a reason to stop smoking as if there aren't so many pregnant women smoking right this second#between this and my friend who keeps dating mentally unstable men in order to have a kid despite a risk of maternal death#and a another befriended couple that seems to be head over heels for getting pregnant asap despite some red flags#it feels very very isolating to be a woman right now#oh i forgot to vent that friend a seems to reject it when i say that statistically it can take like a year to get pregnant#and she also doesn't want to get tested.#like i get that since im not planning on kids rn and took active steps for birth control im more aware of the risks and statistics#but it's worrying how little some people want to think about things like money mental health physical etc before having kids
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solbaby7 · 10 months ago
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Sweet Thing
pairing: rhysand x reader
[ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ]
part 4 of the shy!reader massage mini series
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warnings: swearing, sexual implications, possible violence, jealousy, gambling, male egos, petnames (bc being called bunny is so cute and soft, fight me on it)
summary: Your High Lord hosts a party with a dozen hothead Illyrian soldiers where you become the main attraction
“Stay close,” Rhysand murmurs in your ear, a warm hand pressed at the low of your back to guide you into the large room. It’d been recently renovated; not yet decorated and you'd assumed it was turned into a makeshift meeting area, a giant table pushed in the middle with a dozen chairs wrapped around it. It was also the furthest room from your own—a little detail that Rhys quickly bristled over when you'd mentioned it earlier. “Wanted to keep my good luck charm close by tonight.”
Your cheeks warm under the words, annoyingly aware of how sensitive your body had become in response to the High Lord since that night. It haunted your every breath; his barely contained need, the throbbing cock just a few measly layers away from being everything you’d ever dreamed of and Rhysand fed off of it like ravenous wolves who'd been starved three winters over. The teasing was merciless; heated touches and sinful words of remembrance haughtily whispered in your ear when you were supposed to be concentrating.
“Tell me what you’re thinking about.” You shy out of his touch, the hunger in his voice unmistakable and creating distance is easy when the others begin to filter in. A dozen or so pristinely dressed males of all sizes briefly greet Rhysand, hands clapping at each others backs and the testosterone that filtered in was thick enough to suffocate. They were friends; guys he’d fought and bled with, people he’d known for hundreds of years all gathered for card games and expensive glasses of liquor.
You were only there to help, to look pretty and shuffle the cards and stay close to Rhys—easy enough. “I’m thinking I should’ve dressed better.”
His fingers trace over the pleated pattern of your skirt, the soft purple fabric teasing at the middle of your thigh and all he can smell is some fruit on your skin—pomegranate? pear? “You look perfect, don’t worry about all them. You’ll be collecting their money for me by the end of the night.” Rhys is touchy; shamelessly so in front of others and you notice a few of the guests beginning to take you in, their stares raking up your form, sizing you up and you can feel Azriel shift closer from beside you.
"You always did have the prettiest little things hanging off your shoulder, Rhysand." Your head slowly turns to face the drawling voice, male entitlement and an incredulous amount of confidence seeping from every pore. Handsome and wealthy, but the allure dies the moment his mouth opens. The tailored suit alone was worth three months of the average faes rent and then some. "You have to tell me where you found this one."
Rhys laughs but you can tell there's no real humor behind it, his hand raising to wrap around your waist and pull you in closer; enough for your thighs to skim on the arm rest of his chair. The body language is possessive no matter how casual it’s intended to be and you catch Cass and Az sharing a look—mentally agreeing to pounce when they deemed fit.
Like salivating lions dressed in sheep's clothing.
"Couldn’t tell you, Maverick, she just stumbled in my lap."
He's trying to hold back for the benefit of the greater good—that was the whole point of inviting them over in the first place. Even after Mor had insisted that it was the dumbest idea ever inviting a dozen ill-tempered Illyrian soldiers and filling them up with booze. "I'd love to see her stumble in mine."
Your reaction is instinctual after feeling the High Lord's shoulders tense under your fingers and in seconds your hands are gently kneading at the muscle there, a palm running soothing lines up the length of his back and manicured nails scratch wonderfully at the nape of his neck until a bit of that darkness subsided. With a hum, you gently push his hand from your waist, backing away with a pitch only audible to him, "Gonna grab you guys some drinks."
"I'll help." You don't even try denying the spymaster, more than familiar with his customs and how unbearably uncomfortable he got once you started taking care of large groups of people. Az was always the first to say thank you when you served dinner and always made sure to wait until you sat down and took the first bite before even touching his fork.
He's quiet behind you, busying his hands with polishing the glasses you'd lined up and his shadows follow you around like a clingy pet but you understand why he's there—a silent promise that he'd have your back the entire night. That you’d never be left alone.
Azriel watches you pour a six-hundred year old bottle of amber liquor one knuckle deep for every cup besides one—that one got double and a single ice cube. Just how the High Lord liked it. "It's going to be fine," You tell him softly, storing away the rest of the bottle and you don't fight the smile that pulls when he stops you from carrying anymore than three glasses—brunting the rest of the work on the shadows. "Just a few hours and it'll all be over."
Azriel only hums but there's an underlying gratefulness for not having to speak or explain and his protectiveness towards you grows at how easily you understand him—adapting to his moods with ease.
He returns to his seat, shadows wisping their thanks over the length of your calf and a sweet smile is sent Cassian's way when he presses a grateful kiss to your hand. You turn to go back to Rhys, one final drink in your hand and you can feel Maverick's eyes trailing you, undressing you, touching and lusting from afar but he might as well have been shouting it across the room from the top of his lungs. "Come sit, bunny. And shuffle the deck, will you? They think I cheat."
"We know you do." Another male chuckles over the rim of his glass, blue eyes sharp and tawny curls tickle at the sides of his ears—Cade, you learn after a few minutes of listening in silence. You sift through the deck, righting the cards and splitting them in two before shuffling once, twice, a third time before you set it before you to be split by another. “Look at the hands on this one,” Cade poorly whispers to Maverick, shoulders bumping playfully and you felt like you were being hunted, ganged up on—eaten alive by males who didn’t follow the same code as the ones you hung around. “I bet they get the job done quite nicely.”
Rhysand has no time to respond because Cass is already doing it; gold battles with blue, large hands broadcasted before him and the General looks down at them to peer like a high maintenance woman after her nail appointment. “You should look at mine,” Crimson red Siphons glow with life on his arms; all seven of them, most hidden by the dark long sleeved shirt he wore but the message got across rather quickly. “I’m sure they’ll do it much better.”
You shift in Rhys’ lap, settling into the hands splayed around your waist, the other trails ticklish lines up the length of a bare arm and you’re grateful for how quickly the conversation shifts. “What do I do now?”
The low cadence of his voice rumbles against your back, hair gently pushed off one shoulder to make room for the chin that settles there. His instructions are thorough and intended to be purely informational but the smell of his cologne, the large hands sliding down lower to rub at the sides of your thighs and you’re unbearably aware of the plush of your ass nestled right atop of him. Cards are dealed, the rest left in a pile and you slowly draw three, facing them upright and most of the rest is a bit of a blur.
Every now and then Rhys will lean closer to mumble about what was going on but mostly it was just a room full of drunk males and their money. They cursed like sailors and laughed like hyenas, a chorus of voices overlapping the other until the liquor took its course and the true personalities settled in.
At some point you stand, hands grazing the back of Rhys’ neck when you mutter something about grabbing a snack. You’re not far, maybe a few feet away, body just barely obscured by the wall that separates them and the kitchen while you pile a plate full of finger food to snack on; fruit, mini sandwiches, warm meats wrapped in flaky dough and you’re pulled away from your focus when a voice clears. “There you are,” Maverick doesn’t look shitfaced but the liquor was definitely taking its toll, his steps a little unsteady and he slurred the s’s in his words. “How about you come rub my shoulders for me, sweet thing?”
Your brows furrow, mouth opening to give a response when the males hand raises to trace the line of your collarbone, you freeze. Four fingers graze over your shoulder and slowly moves down the length of your arm. “I don’t think—“
“I’m not asking you to think, sweet thing.” Your stomach churns, discomfort evident in the way you crane away from his touch but Maverick doesn’t care—as if unreciprocated want wasn’t an issue for him. “I’m telling you to come over here and offer up some of that treatment you’ve been feeding those three,” His eyes feel like hands in the way they roam your body, catching on bare skin and practically salivating to see the rest. “Swear I’ll return the favor.”
Your heart hammers in your chest and anxiety swells—you really should’ve just stayed put, the food in your hand threatening to spill to the floor with the intensity of your shaking but Maverick feels so close and you can smell his cologne; the whiskey. “I should get back to Rhys.” It’s no more than a whisper but when you try to slink past him, a hand clamps tightly around your arm, roughly tugging you back.
“Where the fuck do you think you’re going?”
A whimper escapes and just like that the kitchen explodes with darkness; relief overtakes your form as familiar hands tug you close and the arms that tuck you in close feel right—safe. Safe enough to not notice the warm spray of wetness that splatters against the back of your legs until you hear the steady drip,drip, dripping on the floor. Your head turns but before you can look Rhysand is tucking you in tighter, full lips pressing kisses to the top of your head. “Don’t look—let’s just get you cleaned up.”
“What about the others?”
“Cassian and Azriel will handle them,” The High Lords voice isn’t nearly as calm as you remember and it’s only when you’re halfway down the hallway does he loosen his grip a bit, turning you to face him to begin his assessment. “Did he hurt you? Did he fucking touch you?”
You can’t form words, realization beginning to form when you see blood splattering your clothes but you manage to shake your head. “He just grabbed me—Rhys did you—“
“I shouldn’t have let you go alone.”
“It was just a second.”
“A second longer and he could’ve—“ He stops himself from saying more; too afraid to make the words reality or too pissed to have to verbalize them but Rhys lets out a deep breath when he can find no damage besides a hint of a bruise. “I should’ve taken my time.”
You don’t need to ask to know what he means.
Instead, you place a palm on his cheek in hopes to ground him, to remind the High Lord that you were safe. Violet eyes soften, silver flecks catching in the light and it takes everything in you not to buckle beneath him when he looks at you like that—like it was nothing to kill for you. “Let’s go, I’d say it’s about time you return the favor and give me a massage.”
Mischief glints in those eyes, a smirk curling at the corner of full lips. “I can’t promise I’ll remain professional.”
“That’s sort of what I’m counting on.”
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yandere-sins · 3 months ago
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A Camgirl's Happiness
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a/n: To be fair, I know very little about actually streaming or cammodeling, and it's not as easy to read up on, so take my descriptions with a grain of salt. Also, I know that most people doing that job are really into it and I'm very happy for them, but I needed the drama for the story, hope you can understand! I hope you guys enjoy it regardless, it was fun to write!
Warnings: Yandere, Sexual Content (Reader is a camgirl, mentioning of stripping, fulfilling sexual favors for viewers), Fem!Reader, Life struggles (Debts, Mental health problems), Mention of stalking, Obsessive Behavior
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You knew exactly what you were doing, pulling your legs up on your chair, squeezing your breasts just a bit more prominently towards the camera.
Ding! Ding! Ding!
"Hi SweetsMaster! Longtime no read! We're just talking today, but I'm so glad you made it to the stream!"
Ding! Ding!
Smiling, you watched the crushing waves of messages, your fanbase as active as ever as they flooded you with their adoration. Even when you had an image to uphold, you couldn't help but be pampered by their compliments, giggling and telling them to stop calling you adorable and their "dream girl".
Still, you played along to their fantasies, hid your face behind your palm coyly, and kept them believing that you were this cute internet star they loved so much. Life was hard, but getting an end to your means barely needed more than an hour or two talking about all the cute things you'd do if you had one of these lonely, unhappy people behind the screen as your partner. You didn't complain that they invested their savings into spending time with you instead of therapy.
Not like you ever considered going to therapy yourself, too ashamed of the truths you'd have to share.
You sighed inwardly, forcing yourself to smile a bit more convincingly at the camera as you took a sip of water, letting some drops fall into your cleavage. "Oopsie!" you giggled, forced to appear bashful, hoping no one clipped that. But what were you thinking? Of course, they did.
"Stop that, guys! How embarrassing! People will think I can't even drink!"
Sometimes you didn't recognize your own voice as you put on a show. The pitch was too high, your words made you cringe. As if you were in a sketch, rather than a life performance. You quickly wiped away the droplets sitting on top of your skin, threatening to run down the curve of your breasts as many of your viewers hoped before continuing to chat with the rapidly growing crowd. Being a camgirl had been fun once—unforced.
When you started doing it, you enjoyed the time with every new follower you got. Some were creeps, but some were genuinely nice people who paid you to do things you enjoyed. You didn't feel strange being yourself back then; people supported you just as you were. Taking off your clothes and doing favors was a fun little side hustle to get you through college. You didn't plan on doing this forever.
But even with your degree, your real job, and all the possibilities you had now, you couldn't stop streaming. You tried countless of times! But every time you said goodbye for good, your life was thrown into chaos, your bills left unpaid. You lost your job, lost your home, lost all the friends that couldn't watch your life being ruined.
And now, you were tired. So, so tired.
You got back on your feet, thanks to streaming. You found a new job, a new home. More and more people joined your shows; they bought you gifts and sent you money. Even if there was no one to share your earnings with, at least you didn't have to worry about your debts anymore. You'd stream after work, on the weekends, vacations. You organized photoshoots and sold your pictures and merch on the side, even though no one ever wanted to get hired by you to help with all the packaging and work it took.
> you're nothing like you were when you first started
Someone typed in chat, and your fake voice began to crack as you read it out loud. Quickly, you composed yourself, but it stung.
"Yeah, well, aren't we all someone different than, let's say, three years ago? I've grown a lot as a person since I first started! And thanks to you guys, I was able to afford better equipment, too!"
Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!
You laughed at the incoming donations, forming a heart with your hands as you thanked your patrons. "That's going to be a new mic soon!"
> that's not what i meant
The same person from before wrote into the chat, their name—DarlingLover—highlighted in baby pink, revealing they were a superfan. You couldn't ignore them, even though you wished nothing more than for this conversation to end.
> you looked much happier back then
"That's not true!" you chimed up, using all your strength to press down the tears you felt shooting into your eyes. It was bittersweet to be seen in this industry. To not be objectified and idolized, but to have someone truly notice the person behind the on-camera persona.
"I love hanging out with you guys! I made so many new friends, and I'm grateful for all the support and love you guys have shown me! I would never have had the chance otherwise!"
Blowing some kisses towards the camera, your donations went wild, reassuring you that your cover hadn't been blown. You had to keep yourself together, you couldn't risk one perceptive fan to showcase how miserable you were. But perhaps you had to take it as a sign. A sign that it was enough for today. You needed to eat something, and the clock on your monitor—10:47 pm—reminded you that you skipped dinner long enough. And once you had some substance, you'd need the five hours of sleep before you'd have to drag yourself out of bed and to your real work.
"Okay, guys, that's it for tonight! Thank you all for joining our talking stream! I hope you had as much fun as I did!"
Slipping your hand beneath the spaghetti strap of your tank, you pushed it off your shoulder teasingly. "And just as a little reminder," you mumbled seductively, winking at your audience. "Join us tomorrow for a very fun night!"
Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!
You grinned cheekily, waving at the people and blowing them a few more kisses while the donations kept pinging in. Just two more clicks and you had closed the stream, watching it on your second monitor to see if your 'stream ended' notice got displayed properly. The animation had been damn expensive, and you wanted to use it to its fullest until it would be too outdated that you needed a new one.
Watching it for a while, you noticed that amongst the countless messages notifying you that someone left the stream, a few people still had a very eager conversation even after it ended. Immediately, the baby pink name of the superfan who had chatted with you before stood out, the user vehemently defending their standpoint against some newer fans. You clicked their names and checked them out, seeing the varying times from a few months to a few days of subscription to you, as well as the very sparse donation they made.
> i've been here longer, i'd know if she was truly happy
DarlingLover wrote, and you gulped, feeling the anxiety brewing inside your stomach. You couldn't believe they'd go out of their way to try and pull others on their side. Were they trying to ruin your career on purpose?
>> what an idiot lol >> srsly she wouldn't do it if she didn't want to >> yeah what the hell lol
A sigh of relief escaped you, seeing how the others didn't believe DarlingLover. Once again, your reputation was upheld even if it might cost you this superfan. It was expected in this industry to lose and gain followers. Some could withstand changes with their devotion, and others couldn't. You watched as the number of current visitors to your stream continued to drop relentlessly, the sight calming your mind.
You should have gotten up and made dinner, hit the hay before you could pity yourself any more than you had all evening. Your mood was already down the drain, but you were too exhausted to get up, thinking of just dropping into bed and sleeping until morning instead of doing anything else. You couldn't afford to not care for yourself, but it all felt so meaningless.
> Darling, you there?
A stray message popping up in chat caught your attention. You had three more visitors. Two must have just left it open on the side, but the third one was still chatting. With who? you wondered, waiting for someone to respond. But no one answered, DarlingLover, and a whole minute passed by.
> if you read this, can you message me privately? i want to book a private session
You inhaled deeply.
"Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck," you groaned, letting your head fall back against the gaming chair you had bought for your desktop setup. Pink and cute and so expensive. Private Sessions were the only reason you could afford a 500$ chair in the first place. But you really, really didn't want to. Really didn't want to entertain someone who had ruined your evening enough.
Click.
< Hi! :) You wanted a private session? Thank you so much, I look forward to it! Do you have a date in mind? I'll check with my bookings, but I'm sure we can find some time this week!
Yes, you hated yourself. But this user was a superfan, and you never let anyone down before. For the right price, you could do anything—or so you told yourself repeatedly. Trying to make yourself believe you could do it, burned out and exhausted as you were. It was just one more private session; you'd get through it, just like you always had.
> i've noticed how unhappy you are lately. you don't smile like you used to, don't tell us about what is happening in your life. you're like a pretty doll that sits and entertains us out of habit. i hate it. i want the real you back
That again. You scowled at the screen, your stomach grumbling in agreement (and hunger). "What do you even say to that?" you mumbled into the silence surrounding you. It was pitiful that you still lived in the same two-room flat since college, all your money going into debt and equipment rather than buying nice things for yourself. It made the dark, quiet loneliness so much more derisive. It was your life, but even so you could do nothing but entertain others to live in a way you didn't want to. You were so lost, your whole life purpose seemingly meaningless as the streams and viewers demanded more and more from you.
< I'm sorry you feel that way! :( I'm always trying my best to be myself and kind. I hope it didn't seem like I'm just faking it for the others! Please give me a chance to prove that I'm still me, and I'll do my best to meet your expectations!
Tears stung in your eyes as you typed out the words. You didn't want to grovel or apologize for how the world had ruined you. You couldn't push the blame on everyone else forever, but you truly felt wronged by your own life. Apologizing for being forced into a role you didn't want to have was way worse than when you made an actual mistake, but if you wanted to keep up the image, it was what you had to do.
> it's okay. i know you work so hard, i'm so proud of you for that
Your supporter's sudden shift in attitude made you lean back in your chair, your breath escaping you as you felt the tension being lifted. Perhaps he wasn't as weird as you assumed by his insistence on ruining the little composure you had in your stream. Maybe he was truly just concerned for you.
> that's why i'm going to help you!
Raising an eyebrow, you couldn't help but cringe. Nothing good ever came from someone saying they would "help" you. They were merely justifying themselves for wanting something unhinged from you, mostly something you weren't comfortable with. You relented to them in the past, but did you really have to put up with it still?
< Thank you so much for giving me a chance! ♥ Have you decided on a day then for our session?
> tomorrow night, 8pm, hotel loveline. i'll book the room, just mention my name to the receptionist, and they'll give you a key
You felt all goodwill shatter into a million pieces as you read the line. Bringing your hands to your face, you rubbed over the wrinkles and tension you held in the grimace of an expression you were making, wishing you could just drop the conversation and go to bed. It wasn't the first time someone asked to meet up personally. You had never done it before and wouldn't break your boundary for that guy now.
< I'm so sorry, but I don't do personal meet-ups! If you want a private cam session, please let me know, and I will arrange it! :)
"Please, god, let him get the hint," you prayed under your breath, but you should have known better. He was a persistent one.
> i'll make sure you gain thrice the followers than you do in one month just from our collaboration. surely people will send lots of donations, too. the only thing i want is you, natural, real. mine for the night
"Flattery will get you nowhere, Mister," you grumbled, slowly getting angry at this guy. Why did he lie through his teeth? How in the world would someone get you thrice the subscribers from a private session? Why make big promises that were impossible to keep? And he was paying for it, so there would be no donations for you. But even so, with your teeth grinding in frustration, you typed out the nicest rejection you possibly could.
< Sorry, but I'm really not comfortable with personal meet-ups! And charging you for a whole night also makes me feel bad; my rates aren't cheap, after all. It wouldn't be fair to you. Let me know if you are still interested in a cam session, I'll give you a discount since you've been a fan for so long! :) ♥
There was an eery silence in the chatroom, and you glimpsed towards the bathroom, wondering if you had time to get ready for bed until he replied. Ultimately, you decided to wait it out, just to be polite, while you scolded yourself for offering a discount. This interaction alone should have warranted an extra charge on top of your regular rates.
> you like your current day job, don't you?
This statement caught you off-guard. You hadn't spoken much about your new employment on stream, not wanting to bore your viewers with such trivial things when they were there to be entertained.
> wouldn't you be sad if you were fired again?
"What do you mean?" you typed back, the confusion growing.
> i take good care of my darling, and you'll enjoy what i have prepared for you. if you can no longer pretend to be happy, i will help you find that happiness again, help you choose the right path
< you scare me
You typed the words before thinking them through. This was the real you, not the persona he knew and wanted to see, and she just messed up big time.
< I'm sorry, I meant to say your comments can be interpreted weirdly, and it's a little scary to read them right now. I'd still be up for the cam session if you're interested, though?
Anything, you thought, anything to stop him from saying more weird shit.
Does he... does he know you? You pondered the thought for a while. Trying to find a weird interaction you might have had before in your real life. One where someone spoke to you like he did. But you couldn't recall it. How did you know about your job though? Was he perhaps a colleague? But even they knew very little of you, and definitely not about your other job.
"Do I know you?" you asked when he didn't reply anytime quick.
Immediately, you regretted showing vulnerability in front of this stranger. From the moment he joined your stream, DarlingLover had seen through your charades, the online persona you had kept up so carefully. They were laying you bare in an uncomfortable, personal way. You've always been so careful with information about your personal life, keeping all your stories vague and unidentifiable, never naming brands of the stores you visited, or talking about the companies you were part of. How did he know where you lived and about your work?
You wished he'd just stop and disappear to where he came from.
> not yet :)   > but you will get to know me—all of me—when we see each other tomorrow. i'll make you smile again, i'll make you happy. you'll be my darling star again, just like before! my reason to live, my beloved. i can't wait for tomorrow, see you soon!
DarlingLover left the chat.
You stared at the message for a while, perplexed and dumbfounded as you tried to make sense of it. You replayed the interaction over and over but could find no logic or reason behind it. You didn't know this guy, he didn't know you. At least, not personally. But he did know more about you than any of your subscribers should.
Part of you hated him, but the rest of you was scared. Scared of what would happen if you scorned him, the havoc he'd unleash on your life. You were scared of the embarrassment he could cause you if he revealed your secret sidehustle to your work, feared how the opinion of you would change now that you finally found work that you liked and coworkers that you could have fun with. You were finally one leg into having a normal life, only for some stranger on the internet to come and ruin it again. It made you mad and drove you downright crazy.
Clicking his username over and over, it stated he was offline. You couldn't open a new chat again, couldn't scream at him how you weren't going to do that! How you wouldn't meet him for real because he could very well be a psycho or murderer! Surely, he'd not give you back the time you lost streaming, the friends you pushed away to earn money, or your happiness in exchange for success!
"What do I do?" you sighed, rubbing your face once more. You were so tired, you had to go to bed. Soon, you'd have to get up, get to work, and decide whether you wanted to attend the meet-up.
Wait.
Why was that even a decision?
Of course, you wouldn't go! He couldn't force you! He couldn't—
Did you really have a choice?
Flopping into your bed, you groaned. In a fit of anger, you punched your fists into the mattress a few times before the strength left you. Of course, it was your choice. You had started over before. If the worst came to fruition, you'd just do it again. Nothing was lost. You could do it! You could refuse the offer and live a happy life away from streaming and the judgment of other people! It would be hard. So very hard. But you could do it!
Sleep overtook you before you could prepare yourself for bed. You didn't hear the ping of a chat message. All your body had left in it was to sleep away the exhaustion, even if it meant knocking you out for good and without having an alarm set for the next morning. Big decisions would have to be made the next day, but you were asleep, unaware of the weight resting on your shoulders.
And you didn't notice the red light on your webcam, saying it was still on even though your screen had long closed down.
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< sleep well, darling :) ♥
His lips curled into a wicked, lovestruck grin as he moved the window with the video live feed of your bedroom to the second monitor. Finally. Finally, he'd get to meet you. His idol, his darling, his beloved streamer. He adored and worshipped you since the day you started. Watched every one of your streams since the day you joined his life.
Without you, his channel wouldn't exist. People wouldn't adore him, wouldn't watch him. The masses of fans enjoying his lengthy cock-stroking sessions, buying his ASMR audios to masturbate to—they all wouldn't exist without you. Even when he was down when he just started, seeing you smile and do your best for the few followers you had was what made him continue working hard for you.
And now that he had long surpassed you, it was time he gave back the gratitude he felt towards you.
The thought alone of meeting you was getting his cock rock hard, ready to burst. He wasn't even sure if he could look into your eyes without cumming instantly like a pathetic loser. But he wouldn't mind being a loser again if it meant he got to meet you.
"I love her streams," he hummed blissfully, closing the connection to your stream as he palmed himself over his sweatpants. Thanks to your lovely end of stream announcement, showing all your best moments, no one even noticed he'd be off chatting with you. "She's my favorite streamer ever."
Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!
Donations went off as he pulled down the waistband, revealing the girthy mass that his followers loved so much. He'd been so ashamed as a teenager for having this monster of a cock, but on the internet, he found solace. People loved imagining riding him, giving him BJs, the whole nine yards, but he saved himself. For you. You'd be the first, and if he did his job well, you'd be his last.
"Before we get to the main part of tonight," he teased, gripping his length in his hand, squeezing and caressing it for the whole community to see. Head rolling back, he imagined your warmth spread around him, his cock pulsing eagerly as he wished to know what it would feel like to pop the tip into your tight pussy.
Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!
He grinned. They loved him so much. Everyone loved the former loser now turned into a hot, sexy internet sensation. And you would, too. Very soon.
"I want to announce that we're going to have the collaboration of the year right here, on this channel, tomorrow. Starting at 8:30pm! Make sure you're here to witness it, Darling."
Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!
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hannahhook7744 · 1 month ago
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Why Franklin and Maryann Portman are the Worst™ (Part 1)!;
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I want to preface this by saying that I know that by no means Franklin and Maryann Portman are the actual worst parents in fiction or in this series even. 
Of course they aren't. 
But that doesn't mean that I can't still refer to them as the worst™ for them being shitty. Even if I do believe that on some leave that they do care about/love their son. 
I also wanna point out that it's been awhile since I read the books so I'm going off my memory and the wiki for this. So I may forget some context of why this or that happens, and if I do that, feel free to comment it down below respectfully. And if I forget something that you find shitty that they did, also feel free to reblog or comment it down below because I would love to talk about these characters and fandom more.
Am I saying that Abe Portman is 100% perfect and did nothing wrong whatsoever? No, that would go against how his character is betrayed in the books—as a flawed traumatized man who did his best to be there for his family and keep them and himself (as well as others) safe and went about some things the wrong way. 
 Now that that's out of the way…
According to the wiki:
“Jacob was born on Halloween, and up until he was eight years old was convinced by his parents that trick-or-treating candy was birthday presents (something apparently revealed in Hollow City).” 
These people are rich. 
R-I-C-H. 
Rich enough that Jacob’s dad can study birds and volunteer and write mine books that he never publishes without the worry of them not having anything to eat. 
R-I-C-H enough that Jacob comments that “I did love her, of course, but mostly because loving your mom is mandatory, not because she was someone I think I'd like very much if I met her walking down the street. Which she wouldn't be, anyway; walking is for poor people.” And rich enough that they gave their kid their four year old sundan so that they could get a brand new car. 
And for eight years, they had their son believing that candy was a birthday present. 
1. Now, look. I get it. Birthday shopping is hard, especially for a little itty bitty kid but not actually having the money to buy your only kid gifts and choosing not to because people are handing out candy on that day anyway? That's not a very nice thing to do for that long. 
They let him go through three years of school thinking that and we never learned how he found out that was a lie. That's not even including the fact that the rest of their extended family let this lie continue (assuming they knew). 
Can you imagine if Jacob found out because he mentioned this to his classmates or a teacher? Maybe a teacher or family member could salvage the situation but little kids can be brutal, especially towards other little kids who they think are wrong and considering we know that in that same year, Jacob was pants-ed causing him to stop believing anything Abe said…. It's not entirely out of the realm of possibility tl believe that one of Jacob's classmates got in a fight with him over it and caused some kind of embarrassing, painful memory. 
Though I guess it's a good thing they didn't get Jacob birthday presents that early on considering my second point. 
2. The birthday scene. 
Look at his birthday scene. 
This scene? Shouldn't really exist. 
Not because I hate birthday scenes but because Jacob literally told his parents he didn't want a party which under normal circumstances is a reasonable ask within itself. But these? These aren't even normal circumstances. 
Jacob doesn't want a party because the one person he'd actually want there, in his own words, is his grandpa. His grandpa who died in his arms nine months before and who Jacob has been viciously mourning for said nine months. His grandpa whose death caused Jacob's ‘mental breakdown’. 
Whose house they had also cleaned out recently, doing shit all for the now sixteen year old’s mental health and grief. 
But what do his parents do? 
Throw him a surprise party.
A surprise party.
For their jumpy traumatized son who found his grandpa bleeding out in the dark after getting attacked by a monster (or ‘rabid dogs’) and who has been sleeping in the fucking laundry room. 
Why on earth would going against his wishes be good for him? He said he didn't want a party and under these circumstances, it's even more understandable. If you really want your son to socialize or to celebrate, then get him a cake or some food he likes and invite his friend over. Talk to him. 
Don't throw him a party he doesn't want and don't throw the kid who's been having non-stop nightmares about the monsters who killed his grandfather a fucking surprise party. 
To make matters, in this party:
One of his uncles he’s not close to tries to spring a summer trip to his house on him, listing shit that he likely knows Jacob doesn't like with no previous warning to the kid himself (his parents were just planning to ship him off, whether he wanted it or not). 
They're calling Jacob's apparent disorder ‘his thing’. 
And nobody is actually getting him anything he wants. Just shit they've been gifted and are trying to get rid of. 
Gifts like CD's of country Christmas music or subscriptions to Field and Stream (because his Uncle Les thinks he's outdoorsy, this one I can understand slightly since Jacob did want to be an adventurer but still). 
The only exceptions being:
 1. The key to the family four-year-old sedan, which Jacob is embarrassed to be receiving in front of Ricky (who Jacob hasn't talked to in a long while after a fight they had). 
And 
2. A camera Jacob had been wanting for ages (since last summer) from his parents….who likely only gifted it to him because of his dad's new book.
Which leads to his mom drunkeningly making front of her husband at her sixteen year old’s birthday party…. Real classy. 
Oh and 3. A book that belonged to Abe that Jacob's parental Aunt Susie snagged trom the house when they were cleaning it out. A book titled “The Selected Works of Ralph Waldo Emerson”. 
She gave this to him, saying it was from Abe because he'd written Jacob's name in it. 
Thoughtful right? 
Well everyone else doesn't think so because they go quiet. Jacob's mom, Maryann even while drunk, tries to say it was thoughtful and that she didn't know Abe was a reader.
Meanwhile Jacob's dad, Franklin, is barely hiding how pissed he is. 
Like dude. 
Dude. 
Do you really hate your own dad so much that you don't want your grieving son to have even just a book of poems that the only member of the family who he was close to left for him? Are you still, even after that disastrous day where you cleaned out the fucking house with him there and fought with him, refusing to let him have any ties left?
To be fair, you can say that this is because of his own history with Abe and that it's because Jacob is in a worrying state. But that doesn't really hold up considering that they let Abe babysit Jacob often and fill his head up with stories they thought he embellished  due to his own trauma and because they thought that Jacob was well enough to handle trashing and donating all of his dead grandpa’s stuff. 
Sure, they don't take the book from him but the fact Franklin can't even hide how pissed he is is shitty. 
That's not even considering this little tidbit here:
“My mother leaned toward me and in a tense whisper asked if I needed a drink of water, which was mom-speak for keep it together, people are staring.”
….
Do I even need to say anything?
The fact that Jacob thinks this probably means that his parents—or even just Maryann—have said this to him before. Frequently so, even. To the point where he's trying to escape the room, feeling like he might cry, and instead of thinking that his parents (or anyone in this family) might be able to potentially comfort him in this hard moment, this is what he's thinking. 
It's infuriating.
But not as infuriating as my last point for now!
3. Franklin sent his then fifteen year old son to deal with what he thought was his dementia ridden, war world 2 veteran father having a PTSD attack/episode. 
Franklin gets called when he's volunteering at a bird rescue in what is either early afternoon or night by his worried fifteen year old said who tells him that Abe called him ‘flipping out’. 
He asks if he's taken his pills today and Jacob tells him Abe wouldn't tell him. 
At this point, any reasonable adult would go and help their poor ailing father who may be having an episode or PTSD attack about the war, what happened to his family. The monsters. 
At this point, any reasonable adult would send their son home out of danger and call up a friend or sibling or in-law to go deal with the situation. 
What does Franklin do?
He sends his fifteen year old, who is at his job, to go check on Abe. Who again, Franklin thinks is having an episode. 
Now, even if there was a chance that Abe would still recognize Jacob and wouldn't be a danger to him, who would risk sending their son to check on an ailing relative by himself when there's every chance that when Jacob gets there he'll be having flashbacks to the horrors he witnessed. I mean, it's understandable if you or another adult is there and need help calming the man for you to maybe have your teenage son there. Especially if he may be caring for him one day out of choice.
But sending your fifteen year old there by himself to handle the situation when he probably won't know what to do and when he probably hasn't seen one before?
And doing that when you know that your dad was in a war and still has a sea of weapons hidden away behind lock and key (a key which you have) because you can't be half assed to tell the shelter your volunteering at that there's a family emergency?
Franklin literally sent Jacob into a traumatizing situation that could turn dangerous (for Abe or Jacob, if Abe didn't recognize his grandson) under the assumption that all of his paranoid dad's weapons are stored away. 
And what did Abe die with in his hand?
A box cutter. 
Which just proves that Abe had things lying around that he could use as a weapon if needed. Things he could improvise with. 
Just think for a moment about what could have wrong if Abe wasn't actually in danger from a wight but something he was actually imagining—a memory from his past. Imagine what could have happened to Jacob if Abe had mistaken him for a burglar or a wight or what Franklin thought he was imagining.
Jacob can't fight. 
It's dark. 
Things could easily go wrong.
And what would happen if they did?
Jacob would be hurt and traumatized or dead and Abe would likely be in a horrible place if he wasn't, all because Franklin didn't care enough about his dad to go check on him himself. Hell you can he didn't even care about Jacob enough here, because he didn't care about what Jacob could possibly see if he sent him to deal with his grandfather.
Like, not only is he being incredibly shitty to his son but to his own ailing father who was at the very least convinced he was in danger and who was actually in danger (for all Franklin knew his dad could have actually heard someone breaking in but he didn't even take the time to think about it). 
That's all I have time to write for today but there's several other things that they do that are pretty crappy where their son is involved that I will happily discuss.
Hope this doesn't disappoint, @kallmeweirdhprroe .
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yandere-daydreams · 2 months ago
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Okok gonna face my fears and send this off anon . . . ♡ I woke up at 6am and have been plagued by the concept of yan!satosugu with idol darling like all morning
Walk with me here okokokokok. So like satoru obviously has like sooo much money. What if just to get a break from focusing on sorcery all the time he became a sponsor or even producer for a very cute girlypop idol group,,, (and yes I do think he would be kinda weird/creepy to idol darling, especially with how he views himself as basically untouchable (I mean he has enough money to pay the right people off) sooo). 
That’s where suguru comes in (I see this as a mostly canon-compliant geto never defected au). Obviously he would want to keep up with what his best friend is up to, so he’s like a day one supporter of said idol group. With how the japanese idol industry seems to have a focus on the youth and purity of female idols, I could definitely see suguru wanting to “protect his oshi’s innocence” . . .
So if (let’s be honest, WHEN) satosugu bring idol darling home, I could totally see suguru just absolutely babying the poor girl to kind of a weird infantilizing degree?? If that makes sense?? Like very much trying to condition darling into relying on them for everything
I would assume that satoru would be a lot more upfront about how much of a gross perv he is (especially since he probably mistreated the group members to some extent)
I think they would expect total compliance from darling, but if darling ever acts up I can’t help but think one of their go-to punishments would be forcing her to perform the groups choreographies with some sort of “handicap” ie vibrator taped to her pussy at the full speed (and yes they would probably reprimand if she messes up - gotta make sure their number one idol isn’t missing practice!!
Speaking of missing practice/group activities, I fully believe it is within satoru’s capabilities to spread the narrative that darling just kinda . . . suddenly “graduated” from the group and left without a trace, so therefore the other members shouldn’t worry about her and should instead just resume group activities!! (I could also see satosugu using this as some kind of mental leverage over idol darling - like “hey, your group is actually way more popular now that you’ve left”)
Sorry gang I fear I let the thoughts simmer for too long . . .
please let me know your thoughts :3
tw - non/con, kidnapping, idol exploitation, long-term stalking, and obsessive behavior.
WAIT may i suggest: suguru and satoru as parasocial ultra-fans of the same idol as kind of an escapism thing from the stress of being some of the world's most powerful sorcerers, with satoru having the fortune to completely devote himself to making him and suguru your #1 fans. you start to recognize them around the fifth time they miraculously appear at the very front of the line for your post-concert meet-and-greet, but since they're a little bit older and they always have a small gaggle of shy, but polite preteens with them, you just assume they're a pair of wealthy fathers eager to fuel their kids' shared fixation. sure, it's a little strange that the white-haired man always seems more excited to shake your hand than his standoffish son, and it does raise a few concerns when the twin girls spend the majority of their time with you gushing about their black-haired father, but you're a very popular idol with a very busy schedule. you don't have a lot of time to think about one strange family out of the hundred or so you'll meet, that night.
you don't have a lot of time to think about them until your group starts getting extravagant, expensive gifts and donations - always paired with the a gushing fan letter and always sent from one of two increasingly familiar names. since you always seem to be the primary focus, you're the one pressured by your producers to film 'thank you' videos that are just a little too intimidate, to post the type of pictures your generous sponsors compliment the most heavily more often than you may like to. it gets to the point where you're being asked how you'd feel about ""private shows"" to ""ensure the support of a select demographic"", but you adamantly refuse every time it's brought up. it's enough to have to deal with satoru's touchiness at your handshake events, suguru's prying gaze from his permanent seat in the front row of your group's concerts. you don't need to be trapped in the same room as them, alone and all-but paid to cooperate, to know that you want as little to do with them as possible.
that is, until your producer slips you a drink that's just a little too bitter during rehearsal and you wake up in a large room decorated entirely with your merch and memorabilia, to satoru's head between your thighs and suguru behind you, an arm wrapped around your waist and his chin propped on your shoulder as he tells you about how excited they are to finally meet their favorite idol in person, how patiently they've been waiting for you to finally retire and take on a more domestic lifestyle. they'll be delighted to find out that, because of how long you've been in the industry and how protective your fans can be, you're still very much a virgin, and you very much need your two biggest fans to show you what you've been missing <3 if you're lucky, they'll even add pictures of your first climax to the shrine they've been building since they day they first discovered you, the shrine they're going to be keeping you inside of from now on. you might be crying, sure, begging to be let go, but that's alright.
in time, you'll realize how lucky you are to have such devoted fans.
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cuntdevil · 3 months ago
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★ THE CLEANER-UPPER!
a highly-regarded murder cleaner is assigned a job at a hotel. unfortunately, when housekeeping walks in, it breaks bakugo's streak and ability to make a clean getaway.
( fic demographics. ) boku no hero academia, bakugo katsuki, dark content (violence) & sexually mature | minors, ageless & blank blogs: do not interact & 7000 words.
╰┈➤ murder cleaner!bakugo, housekeeper!reader ( afab & she/they pronouns ), mentions of murder, dead bodies & blood. smut: rough sex, bondage with a belt, anal play, fingering, degredation, spanking, etc.
( author's note. ) this fic is based on a mobile game ive been playing recently, nobodies: murder cleaner. it's so fun and was an interesting concept i wanted to turn it into a fan fic uwu.
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Bakugo has always been thorough with everything he does, living his life in a pristine manner that his friends often teased him for. Everything he has and owns has to be placed in their designated areas or his mind will start racing and it’s as though he’s a ticking time bomb. It’s a problem that he has, but he’s made it work in his favor. Especially in his line of business.
When Bakugo’s asked what he does for work, he’s honest. He’s a cleaner. Typically, people won’t question him further. They might ask what a guy of his size and caliber is doing working a small job like that. He’s gone to a well-established university and earned a high-GPA that his academic peers are envious of. Why is he wasting such talent on a dead-end job? Surely, there are other professions and careers he could go in. 
And with further elaboration, Bakugo goes into a little bit more detail, saying that he works for a private company and that he gets paid by the rich to clean up. Then, by seeing the type of stuff he’s able to afford, they can come to some sort of understanding of why he does it. A paycheck is a paycheck and does he really need a job that’s mentally taxing? They learn to dismiss further questioning, even if they’re not satisfied with the course of life in which Bakugo’s decided, and let him be. He’s got a roof over his head and is able to come home to a full fridge. He’s obviously not struggling like they have to. 
But the majority of the time, that’s a stranger’s outlook on his life. People that are more dear to him have come to grow suspicious. Are the rich really that willing to pay him that much money just to clean their homes? Do they really just throw their money away just like that? 
His parents, specifically his mother, have inquired plenty of times about his job. She had asked for full reports about the business he works in and Bakugo’s been willing to share. Giving his mother a business card, pamphlets and flyers, his tax information when she further insisted. And through conducting her own research, everything has checked out. Her son is indeed a cleaner. A well-paid cleaner that’s able to live in a nice luxury apartment by himself, owning a car that’s better than her own, and doesn’t have to come back to his parents for anything financial wise. 
He doesn’t have to worry about a thing, and while that should make Mitsuki happy, it doesn’t. She’s proud that her son has a job and is able to support himself and doesn’t need to depend on her or her husband for anything, but she feels as if she’s not needed— not wanted anymore. He rarely calls and when he does, he makes sure to make it worthwhile, always stating how his job has kept him and away from the phone. When Mitsuki tries to make unexpected visits, he’s never home— peeking through the windows, his apartment barely looks lived in. 
The more and more she thinks about it, Mitsuki realizes that this isn’t normal. Days at a time he would be absent and when he’s back it’s only for a day or two until he’s back on his feet. It’s exhausting to watch, and it surely must be twice as exhausting for Bakugo to keep working such strenuous hours. She’d try to get him to quit, seeing purple starting to form under his eyes. That’s not like her son— that’s not like Bakugo to not get at least eight hours of sleep every night. However, he’s always quick to protest, giving her every reason in the book not to. And he’d always end it that he actually loves his job and loves what he does— that it’s his outlet. 
And with that reasoning only is why Mitsuki hasn’t dragged her son’s ass back home and forced him to quit already. Her boy is happy.
MISSION REPORT: 
Asset #1080, last night Q-100’s logistics expert Shinsou Hitoshi used a known alias to check in to the Escenica hotel in Buenos Aires. Turns out that was the last mistake he ever made.
Our operative had to act fast to catch him in his room, so you may well have a bigger mess than usual on your hands.
Housekeeping will begin making rounds any time now. Make sure there’s nothing for them to find.
Disposing of the mission report right as the plane lands, Bakugo lets out an exhausted sigh. He pulls out his airpods case as he stands to his feet, plopping the small buds into his ears and hearing the habitual chime of it connecting to his device. Swerving past the private flight attendant, his footsteps are as quiet as a mouse, something that used to be unlikely before working in this field. He puts on his playlist, he always plays it when heading to a new job— it oddly relaxes him.
Heading to the black Lexus that’s sitting there waiting for him, he opens the door and hops in, not having to say a word as he’s been driven right where he needs to be. Being introduced to this line of business, Bakugo never thought he’d be someone who’d become insensitive to the sight of death and the thought of it all. However, being led through the first job and oddly finding it satisfying, he slides through every gig with ease and always concludes it a piece of cake when his agent comes to collect a completed mission report. 
People think that what he’s doing isn’t challenging, always giving him looks when he tells them he’s a cleaner, thinking that what he’s doing is a waste of talent. However, he finds it to be his perfect calling, finally finding something that silences that constant creak inside his head. 
When the Lexus comes to a final stop, Bakugo doesn’t bother with a farewell, more like a thankful grunt and nod before exiting the vehicle and watching as the automated doors open for him. It’s awfully quiet for a hotel, he thinks the moment he steps in. It’s close to the holidays. Shouldn't it be a little bit more crowded?
He’s not trying to wish for a difficult procedure tonight, but he finds the silence odd. However, he finds himself grateful the moment he passes a door with the body splayed out on the bed with the bed sheets covered in blood. Rushing in, he curses, “shit.”
I know they had to act fast, but couldn’t they have used some of their senses if they had any? Bakugo continues to curse under his breath the longer he stands inside of the hotel room, moving to turn the lock on the handle. He lets out a sigh as he takes a moment to himself. Scoping the scenery out, he hums to himself silently as he thinks of his options. The first thing he notices are the windows— they’ve been left open. 
I could make it look like he jumped, he suggests before quickly disregarding. No, that’ll call for attention. It needs to be something silent. And something outside of this room— Turning around, he twists the door knob before remembering that he locked it, feeling something flap around underneath. Two signs for maintenance— just what he needs. 
Opening the door and peeking his head through it, the coast is clear. The red ‘do not disturb’ on his door and the green housekeeping sign for the room adjacent to him. This will give him enough time to venture out and get a better look at his options. 
By the time Bakugo’s finished his tour of the hotel, he’s managed to reroute the surveillance off of his floor and housekeeping has fallen for his small diversion, the cart parked right outside the room next to him— he’s managed to successfully snag the keys off of it as well, opening what he needs before setting them back in place. In such a short time, he’s managed to conjure up a plan to successfully hide the body— if he’s able to get the garbage chute up and running in a short period of time while also getting the staff outside of the laundry room right when he needs it. Inwardly, he cheers himself, finding this to be an easy task before instructed another assignment to complete. 
Heading back inside the room, he’s found the edge of the bed frame to be falling off, and hopefully it could aid as a ladder to create a diversion for the laundry staff. Those damn workers will be in there twenty-four-seven if he doesn’t do something about it. Finding the custodial closet using the keys he borrowed, he’s managed to twist off the pipe and found some fuses that’ll help repair the garbage chute. 
Bakugo thought that since it’d be a year since doing this, his heart would calm down and stop pounding against his chest, but as much as he loves it, he’s reminded of the impeccably tight schedule that he’s on and that he needs to do this fast. He moves with a haste, sorting his thoughts out with every step that he takes. Turning off the valve to the water supply, he’s figured that’ll lead to a little halt in the laundromat workers downstairs and with the garbage disposal inside of the custodial room, he can quickly get rid of the body and the blankets in no time. 
Climbing down from the roof, Bakugo pauses when he hears sudden movement. “The damn water stopped working all of a sudden,” a rough voice speaks, his tone rising the more he gets angrier. “What am I supposed to do for the next seven to eight hours?”
“Calm down,” Bakugo hears next, a soft feminine voice coming from whoever the man is speaking to. With the exasperated sigh leaving their mouth, Bakugo can tell that this seems to be an ordinary occurrence of the man complaining and the woman having to hear it. “Call in for maintenance and use the rest of your shift to relax. Easy.”
“Yeah, easy for you to say,” the man scoffs. “You’re just a young thing with nothing much going on. For Pete’s sake, you’re in your twenties working in a goddamn hotel!”
Bakugo doesn’t know how the young woman’s able to keep calm when he hears her nonchalantly retort back, “And you’re in your fifties working in a hotel. Shouldn’t you be working high up in corporate by now?”
You’ve managed to silence the man, completely exiting the clean room and making your way down the line. You’ve gotten used to Aizawa’s complaining by now, but sometimes he knows just what button to push. Like now. Eyebrows rising, you see Adam's apple bob as he realizes his mistake. You have surely proven your point. In his incessant rambling, he forgot that both of you are in this circumstance and while there’s no further hope for him to better his life, you still have that opportunity. And unlike him, you have a plan on making it out of the hotel and finding a much more secure and well-paying job. 
“Y’know what?” Aizawa clears his throat. “I’m gonna go read that book I’ve been meaning to catch up on the worker’s lounge.”
You curtly nod, plastering a faux smile on your face as Aizawa makes his way down the hall and out of your sight. “Tell me about it later.”
With a heavy exhale, you let out your breath as you push the cart down to the next room, forgetting to read the sign as you move to unlock it. Bakugo doesn’t move fast enough before you have the door unlocked and you’re pushing it open. The sight before you doesn’t fully register until a second too late, eyes widening and about to scream when you feel a rough hand planted over your mouth and you’re being pushed up against the wall. It went by in a flash, but it’s vivid in your mind. Pale skin sprawled out on the bed— motionless. Lifeless. Your heart is racing, panging heavily on your chest as the crimson red eyes that match the color of the blood-soaked covers peer down menacingly at you. “Do. Not. Make a sound.”
You finally make eye contact with the person that’s got you in this position. And it’s easy for you to jump to conclusions— think that he’s the killer and because you walked in on this scene, you’re going to be his next victim. Bakugo’s never been in this position before, never getting caught. He doesn’t know what to do in this predicament. 
Actually, he does, but he’s not sure if he wants to carry through. He’s not a killer, only the man that cleans up. He can stomach seeing a dead body, but not sure if he can stomach actually creating one. But, he doesn’t necessarily need to do it himself. He can call his organization, have them do the job for him and he’ll gladly clean it up. 
Could he, though? Could he clean up the body of his own mistake? A young and pretty woman, seemingly around his age range, who had no business being in his. Of all of his tasks and mission reports, he’s never had witnessed a woman being killed and he really doesn’t want to anytime soon. 
Fuck. You’ve really put him in a predicament here. Couldn’t you read the damn sign? 
“Do ya understand me?” Staring into your eyes, he can see that you’re still freaked out. You’re still breathing heavily and your heart’s still racing. Your eyes continue to divert his, trying not to make eye contact at all. His patience is running thin and everything he’s just thought will be running right through the door if you don’t calm down. So, he gives you a little “nudge.”
Shaking you, he clenches his job as he breathes once more, “do y’understand me?”
And finally does it register to you that he’s speaking, fright turning into confusion as your eyes turn glossy. “Mwhat?”
Bakugo seethes, hand pressing down harder over your mouth as he squeezes you into the wall. “Listen to me,” he checks his surroundings, reaching over to lock the door once more while simultaneously making sure he keeps his hold on you. “If ya make a sound, yer going to join this man. I have a pair of pliers that I can use to gouge out yer throat, it only takes a few seconds. Y’understand?”
Tears start to trickle down your eyes as you squeak, nodding your head in obedience. You’ve seen your fair share of movies, true crime television shows and podcasts. You don’t doubt a word that he says. And with a man of his size and caliber, if you dared to fight back, he’d tower over you in less than a second. If he goes back on his word and kills you, you hope it’d be a quick and easy one. So, in his hand, you nod once more. “I understand.”
He keeps you in that same position for a little while longer, staring into your eyes for a bit while longer before letting you go. Dropping his hand, you and him both let out a breath, but he still keeps you trapped against the wall. “Since ya decided to ignore the ‘do not disturb’ sign, yer going to help me dispose of the body.”
You rapidly nod. “Okay.”
You’re complying so easily, it makes him skeptical. “Yer not gonna fight?”
You shake your head, stammering out a “no.”
“Why not?” In response, you start to squirm within his tight hold. His big and calloused arms on your waist. So close to you, you can feel the heat of his breath against your skin, so close to your neck. And his eyes, the color of rubies, despite them scorning you and scrutinizing your every move— they’re pretty. This scruff of a man with messy blond hair towers over you, bulging muscles that have easily pinned you down to the wall the moment you stepped foot into the room. The longer you look into his eyes, you realize that this man has seen some shit and has done even more terrible things. Why would you fight?
“You’d win,” you ultimately shrug. It’s enough to receive another once over from Bakugo, “You got a point.”
Peeking over Bakugo’s shoulder as best as you can, you look at the lifeless body— the corpse seemingly at peace. It makes you curious, and maybe a bit too brave. “W-why’d you kill him?”
“Huh?” Taken aback, Bakugo didn’t know how to answer your question. Should he tell you the truth or should he lie about it? Or should he evade your question altogether? Glancing behind him, at his current job, he lets out an exhale. “Just help me hide the body if you don’t want your skull bashed in.”
With the extra hand by his side, Bakugo was able to seamlessly dump the body inside of the garbage disposal and set everything that he had used back in its previous spot. You were compliant and didn’t argue with anything that he told you to do, able to divert and lie when questioned by your coworkers. It was as though you were familiar with this and had been working as a cleaner yourself. Bakugo was impressed. Still, he’s still unsure what to do with you. 
Standing inside of the hotel room, he’s watched you clean up every crevice of the room, analyzing how you’ve fixed it up to pristine shape for the next occupant. It’s just a shame that the next person will have to deal with the ghost of Shinso Hitoshi. Dropping a spray bottle back into your cart, you slowly turn around to sheepishly view who you suspect to be a murderer. “Are you going to kill me now?”
You’ve taken him back yet again, but more so because you’ve been so calm. How are you not scared at the possibility of losing your life? He doesn’t answer your question and his silence is all that you need to finally break down. “Because before you do, I’d like to at least plead for my life!”
With the raise of your voice, your eyes widen. “Sorry,” you tone it down. “B-but… I won’t say a word. I’ll just— I’ll stay silent! Plus, you’ve made me an accomplice. If I did say anything, you could easily rebuttal it in court.”
You’ve got a point, he sighs. It’s a shocker that he didn’t even think about that before. He just made you an accomplice in the heat of things. Checking the time, it’s late and he has a bit of time for himself before he’s called in for his next task. “Are there any bars close by?”
“What?” you ask, bewildered. He gives you a look, telling you not to let him repeat himself. Gulping, you nod your head, “There’s a few not too far from here actually.”
“When do ya get off yer shift?” 
Checking the time, you do the quick math. “In a little less than an hour actually.”
“Great,” he pushes himself up from off the wall. “We can discuss it over a drink then.”
“You’re not going to kill me then?” The moment you clocked out, Bakugo dragged you outside of the building and instructed you to take him to the nearest bar. As per usual, you complied, bringing him to one that you actually frequented yourself as the bartender immediately recognized you the moment you took a seat, setting a Mojito right in front of you before asking Bakugo what he wanted. With a bourbon in his hand, Bakugo cocks an eyebrow at you. “What makes ya think that?”
“You haven’t done so already,” you shrug. “I don’t know. With all my true crime knowledge, if you wanted to kill me, you’d have done it already. You’ve had plenty of opportunities.”
“Maybe I’m just having my fun with ya before I kill ya off. Have ya thought about that?” Bakugo inches into your personal space, standing up and towering over you. Purposely taking a domineering stance, he watches as fright twinkles in your eyes. Sickeningly does he find some humor in it before he sits back down on the stool. Clearing his throat, he takes another sip of his drink. “Nah, but yer right. ‘M not gonna kill ya.”
“Then why’d you bring me with you?” you ask. “Why not just send me on my way with another threat or something? It'd have worked.”
Leaning into his chair, Bakugo shrugs. “There’s just somethin’ about ya that makes ya interesting—” licking his bottom lip, his eyes grazing over your body, taking you more in. “—just need to discover what.”
Back pressed into the dresser, it aches as the straight edge leaves a bruise on your bare skin. His bare hands are no gentler, calloused palms that hold you down and grip your waist with a vice strength that has your heart beating against your chest. From its incessant pounding, it's caught Bakugo's attention as lets out an airy and amused chuckle. “Not scared to clean up a dead body, but yer frightened by my cock, hm?”
His breath against your neck as his teeth graze the shell of your ear. He paused and in anticipation, your body shudders. “Fear it's the one thing that's gonna kill ya? Yer a rather sick one, aren’t ya?”
You can only mewl out in pain as he pushes you further against the dresser. You can’t help but stare into those crimson eyes of his, how they’re sparkling in lust— lust directed right towards you. However, despite the pain and the haughty desire that courses through your body right now, you can only agree with him. That rush of being afraid, the possibility of losing your life and simultaneously hiding someone that’s already lost theirs. It was an exhilarating experience as you had a tall and brawn of a man that glared daggers into your chest if you dare get him caught. The possibility of aiding a criminal and becoming an accomplice no longer frightened you. No, it was the fact that you enjoyed it and now want to continue feeling that rush of living on the edge. 
At the lack of response, Bakugo can only continue to chuckle in pure amusement. He’d mistaken you as a fragile being when in reality, you’re just as fucked up as everyone else is in this world. What was that saying again? The innocent ones aren’t as naive as they seem? At least it was something along those lines. 
He leans over to bite down on your lower lip, thick and supple as he can taste the remnants of whatever chapstick you were wearing. You shamelessly moan at the feeling of his touch roaming your body. Big hands that reach to cup your ass and grope at them before hoisting you up on the dresser and eliciting a squeal from your lips. Who knew that a vixen such as yourself could sound so pure. Yet, Bakugo takes the opportunity to fully indulge in you, his tongue exploring the caverns of your mouth and giving you no fighting chance towards catching up. Instead, you can only moan and whimper against him as he’s in between your legs and you’re trapped in his vice grip. 
Even with the assisted height of the white piece of furniture, Bakugo still has the leverage. His hips meeting your inner thighs as you feel the press of his clothed erection against your mound. Hands that previously didn’t know what to do finds themselves snaking around his neck and your nails scratching at the nape of his neck, playing with the short strands of his undercut. It drags a guttural groan from him, humming in response to your actions as he pulls away from you. 
Your eyes flutter open to make contact with him once more, they’re glossy and needy as they beg for me. “Please…”
You don’t know what you’re begging for to be quite honest. You just need to feel more of him— to no longer be restrained by each other’s clothing; to feel each other’s raw bodies against each other’s. Bakugo knows exactly what you want, what you so specifically desire. And as much as he wants to give into those natural urges, he finds it fun to tease. “What’s it that ya want?”
His rough fingers start to traverse your body, from the nape of your neck down to your shoulders as goosebumps start to rise in anticipation. From the crevice of your shoulder to your waist does his fingers travel upwards to flick at the nub of your breasts and down to your navel. “What do you want inside of you, hm?”
His gruff and gravelly voice really does wonders to you, spiking up your heart rate even more that you’re concerned if this’ll turn into a medical mishap. Body still so close to yours, you can feel his body heat mixing with yours as small beads of sweat begin to form. “Do you want my fingers inside of ya?” he inquires. “The same ones that were used to hide a dead body? You’d fuckin’ like that, wouldn’t ya?”
And you nod ever so shamelessly, eyes pleading with him to make you feel full in some sort of capacity. “Ah,” he hums. “Once again, so quick to comply and say ‘yes’ to anything I tell ya. It’s kind of… pathetic.”
You let out a screech, fingers reaching for your hair and pulling ever so roughly. He’s forced you to bear out your neck, your chest heaving heavily as you pant. “Don’t you think so, too?”
You squeal out something incoherent, too fixated on the pain to contort anything understandable. However, his grip loosens as he once again pulls you in for a kiss, swallowing away the momentary pain. Pulling away once more, Bakugo looks at you to say, “don’t worry, doll. I promise to make ya feel good.”
He’s kept well on his promise, fingers stuffed inside of you as he’s still got you sat on the dresser. Legs spread open wide for him as he’s hell-bent on seeing just how well your pussy reacts to him. Your juices secrete onto the piece of furniture as your mind is fixated and captivated on this brute of a man. Two digits stuffed inside of you— thick and intimidating. The hands of a murderer, your subconscious whispers into the back of your mind, yet you can’t find the strength to fight him off. And you sure as hell don’t want to, especially when those said hands are being used to bring you to such immense pleasure right now. Has a man ever made you feel this good before? 
You’re afraid to answer your own question as you’re letting another moan as your thighs begin to tighten and your sweet cunt starts clenching around his fingers. Your hand reaches to grab his wrists, but he’s unrelenting as he speeds up the pace. “Oh, God…” you cry out.
“No God here,” Bakugo smiles connivingly. “Just me, doll.”
“I— I’m gonna—”
“Let this pussy cream all over my fingers, baby,” he drawls, spreading your legs even wider with his free hand as he feels your walls pulsate around him. “Show me how much of a dirty slut you are for me.”
And the way your body follows his commands boosts his already inflated ego, a maniacal grin gracing his features as he watches your body convulse. Your mouth falls open in an ‘O’ as you have fallen speechless. A white band forms around the base of his fingers as he continues fingering you through your orgasm, a small puddle starting to form as it widens and sticks to your inner thighs as he watches you in delight. “Yeahhhh…” he breathes, barely above a whisper. 
Not a complete asshole, he gives you a moment for you to relax before he’s pulling you out of your haze suddenly. Forcing your legs to wrap around his waist, he carries you over to the bed, dropping you on it and watching your body bounce on it as he’s caught you off guard. In this naked glory and now laying on the bed so vulnerably, it’s given Bakugo the better opportunity to ogle your body much more closely. He takes in your breasts and your curves down to your delectable cunt that still glistens from your orgasm. Eyes traveling back to your face, nothing beats those features of yours. 
What’s a sweet little maid doing in the hands of him? You’ve surely lost your way.
Bakugo starts pulling off his own clothes, giving you a show that you have no intent on looking away from. And the way your pupils darken is all the reminder that he needs that you aren’t no saint. Reaching for his pants, he pulls at the buckle of the belt, dragging it from the loops with one aggressive swoop before dropping it on the bed. It could possibly find itself handy. 
He maintains eye contact with you, as he watches you sit up on the bed. Unzipping his pants, he shimmies out of it before kicking them off and slowly crawling on the bed and over you. He feels like a predator who’s caught his prey and ready to devour you. Your eyes widen in expectancy, ready and waiting for him to pounce. Both now in an equally naked glory, you’re ready for whatever he has to give. However, from hovering over your body, he’s sitting up once more and removing such close proximity that has you confused and has you questioning his next move. 
Until you feel a hand on your ankle. You can’t imagine the ease it takes to flip you over, not letting out a single grunt as he’s gotten you on your stomach now. Breasts pushed into the soft fabrics of the bed with a hand pushing down on your back as you feel his heavy-weight against you. The jingle of his belt comes to your ears as you look behind you, feeling both of your hands in his grip and he’s using the piece of leather to bind them together. He watches you intently as he smirks, “Can’t have ya movin’ ‘round while I use your perfect little pussy.”
He fixes you how he wants, forcing you on your knees as your upper body lays pliant and still. He’s got your ass and pussy out in the open for his use and he watches how your cunt is once again begging to be filled, clenching onto nothing in the search of friction. He’s got a hand around his length, hard and waiting to fill itself into you and ruin this pretty little body of yours. Dark shaft of his that’s veiny and cut tip leaking of pre, he rubs his head as the many possible ideas of what he could do to you rings throughout his mind. But with the aching throb of his cock, he knows he can’t keep withholding you what you want— what the both of you want. 
With his body weight, he inches forward until you can feel his skin against you. His heavy cock in between the crevice of your ass as his body heat radiates off him like the scorching sun. Engulfed in his presence, your breath hitches as you tug on the tight restraints of the belt wrapped around your wrists. The raspy chuckle that escapes the man above you sends shivers down your spine as he leans into you. His chest presses against you as one hand grabs at the belt-bounded hands and the other helps align his cock with your entrance. “Y’think yer ready for the wild ride, doll? Cuz I don’t think I’ll stop once I start. This pussy just looks too good to give up.”
“Yes,” you huff out, nodding. “Please, I need you in me.”
He grins. “Whatever y’say.”
The walls of your apartment are paper thin, so you don’t doubt that your neighbors can hear your extracurricular activities. You’re not being considerate of their comfort at all as you shamelessly weil into the night. Skin slapping against skin, the wet sloshing sound of your juices sounding through your bedroom as Bakugo fucks you viciously. You’re crying out like a disgusting little whore, first whining about how he was too big of a stretch and now look at you. You’re not bitching anymore. 
“Look at ya,” Bakugo grunts, keeping up the rough and torturous pace. “Taking my cock like the nasty little slut ya’re.”
A thumb prodding at your asshole, puckered and tight, Bakugo lets out a nice string of saliva trickle down in between your ass as he massages the next entrance. The action has you clenching as your nails dig into the palm of your hands, tensing up at the feeling of him teasing your hole. He slaps your ass, nonverbally reprimanding you. “Don’t tell me you can’t handle a finger up your ass now,” he mocks you. “Aww, don’t tell me you can’t handle it. Don’tcha wanna feel good? I know you do.”
You mewl, eyes shut as your face is stuffed into the comfort of your silk-clad pillow, you don’t utter a word to Bakugo. Can’t bring yourself to. “Don’t worry, doll—” For once, Bakugo’s a bit more gentle. Still keeping the exhausting pace of drilling your poor pussy, he rubs your ass with a gentleness. “—It’ll only hurt for a moment.”
He doesn’t give you any warnings, only pressing his thumb deeper until he can’t anymore. Just as he said, where one moment you were squealing in pain, the next your body relaxed as your nerves didn’t know what exactly to focus on. The beatings of your cunt or the thick digit invading your ass. Right as you got adjusted to the additional penetration, you let out a dragged moan that only had Bakugo smirking. “Told ya,” he says with a smack of your ass. 
It’s all overwhelming, how you feel so full yet can’t reach behind you to touch Bakugo, to pull him impossibly closer to you. You whine and moan out, high-pitched sounds that’re like music to Bakugo’s ears as you jut your ass back into him. Your cock swallows him whole, your sweet cunt pulsating and clenching around his length in a desperation for him to breed you. And fuck is he tempted to. He can imagine the ropes of cum he could pour into you, mixing with that intoxicating nectar of yours.
His grunts and moans are guttural as he withholds his orgasm, waiting for that perfect moment. With his thumb still inside your hole, he presses the palm of his hand into your ass, the pads of his fingers digging into your skin and threatening to create dark bruises. “C’mon, doll. I ain’t got all night.”
You’re so close, you can feel it. In the pit of your stomach, that familiar churn rises up inside of you and bubbling up to be something deadly. “Fuck,” you cry. “‘M so close!”
It’s inhumanly possible, but Bakugo speeds up even more, battering down on your pussy until you’re screeching out a garbled mess. White blurs your vision and if Bakugo was trying to say anything, you didn’t hear it. Your body spasms as you feel your inner thighs and the sheets beneath you get soaked. You don’t register the sudden hollowness you feel as Bakugo pulls out, the sight of you squirting getting him on so much that his orgasm follows yours shortly after. Ejaculating, he spurts his cum all over your back as your legs fall pliant as the last of your juices seep into your sheets and you can only lay in your mess. 
Cock softening as droplets of his orgasm drip down your ass, Bakugo pants as he looks at the time. Half past three in the morning, he should really leave. He knows this, but he’s exhausted and if he makes more than five movements, he’s going to knock out for sure. “Fuck,” he curses as he climbs off you and falls to your left side. You’re panting heavily, chest rising and falling as Bakugo looks over at you. Your eyes feel heavy and you’re trying to force yourself to stay awake, but to no avail. With all the strength you have left, you spin to the side and your back towards the blonde in your bed. Bakugo snorts as he shuffles to turn away from you as well. G’night, he grunts out in his mind. 
“I’m not a murderer, by the way.” Bakugo finds his way on the edge of the bed, his back towards you. The sun peeks out through your curtains, giving him the light he needs to get dressed. “Don’t think I’ve ever clarified that. I didn’t kill that poor piece of shit.”
He catches you off guard, making you turn around to view his back. Processing his words, you’re not sure if you believe him or not, but you decide to go along with it. You’ve already laid in bed with the man and you’ve given up on convincing yourself of the morals that you believed you once had. Was this a way to make you feel any better? “Then, what are you?” You didn’t mean for the little laugh to leave you at the end of your question, making it seem like you were doubting him. Though truthfully, you were. 
“I just clean up the bodies after the murder,” he explains as he gets dressed, ignoring your little chuckle. He can’t blame you. “Someone else kills them and I hide the evidence that it even happened.”
“Oh,” you breathe, intrigued. There’s a job for that? Before you can answer any questions, he stands. Now fully clothed, all except for his shoes. 
“Yeah,” he answers, gruffly. “I’ve sent out a recommendation for ya. You seem fit for the job, so I made a call to one of the higher ups to get in contact with ya.”
“You… you did?” Furrowing your eyebrows, it catches you off guard. “How’d… when did you even have the time to do that? You were pretty much glued to me the moment I walked in on you.”
Bakugo smirks. “I’ve got my ways—” Glancing at the clock, he silently curses to himself. “—Anyways, I’ve got to go. See ya around or whatever.”
Your eyes widen at the announcement of his departure, making you sit up in the bed and reach out to him. “Wait!”
“What?” he snaps back, glaring right at you now. “I’ve gotta go.”
“Is that it?” you ask, not sure what exactly that you’re asking. “Is there nothing else?”
“Nothing else to what?” he turns back around. “I’m pretty damn sure you won’t call the cops. That’d be stupid of ya.”
That smirk on his face. Moments ago, you found it to be such a sexually appealing thing, but now you just wanna smack it off his face. “Or what? You want me to say I had a good time with ya? Is that it, doll?”
Your face heats up as you grow flustered. “No.”
“If it makes you sleep better at night,” he crosses his arms, making them bulge even more. “I did.”
With that, he gives you another once over before reaching for the door. Without a goodbye, he swings it open and then shut as he quickly makes his departure.
SEVENTY-TWO HOURS LATER 
Bang, bang, bang. Three hefty knocks at your door that makes you jump out of your seat from around your very small and quaint living area. You haven’t heard from Bakugo since he’s left, and you don’t know how you expect him to when you don’t even have any way to contact him. However, you were still hopeful— still had him on your mind since the moment he walked out of your small apartment. From the three knocks, you’re hoping that it’s him, coming to devour you like he did three days ago. 
“Who is it?” you call out from the other side, but there’s no response. When you look through the small peep hole there’s no one there. Kissing your teeth, you’re about to head back to the couch when something in the back of your mind tells you to turn back around. When you do, you hear the small slip of paper slide from underneath the front door and there’s a singular letter sitting there right at your feet. 
Picking it up, the envelope just has your name on it— first and last— nothing else. Not your address and not one from who or where it came from. It reminded you of some of the last things Bakugo told you. “I’ve sent out a recommendation for ya. You seem fit for the job, so I made a call to one of the higher ups to get in contact with ya.”
Ripping open the envelope, you let the tattered thing fall to the ground as you read letter:
Dear (Y/N),
It’s a shame to know that one of our trusted agents was caught during a mission. Truthfully, you should’ve been handled with more care and caution, but if it were to go that way, you wouldn’t be receiving such an invite like this. Agent #B354 has recommended you to join our very secretive profession to be part of our agency. 
We will give you another twenty-four hours to make a decision and get your bearings together. Whether or not you accept this invitation, you will be sworn to secrecy about this organization or you will be dealt with accordingly— as you should’ve originally been. If you decide to join, welcome to the team Agent #Y976. If you decide that this profession isn’t for you, you’ll receive a non-disclosure agreement to sign and we wish you the best of luck in life.
From, NMC Organization
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( departing words. ) honestly, this fic could've gone on longer and i feel like it could be more detailed, but i don't have the time for that, unfortunately. please leave your comments and feedback below!
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notlhecxzsa · 22 days ago
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Secret Garden In My Mind - N.R
Summary: Y/n's first day was a...roller coaster ride. But, it got more exciting with her first unexpected interaction with Natasha popping out of nowhere, with only the two of them being left alone in the house.
Author's Note: Hiii! Goshhh, I'm so sorry for making y'all waittt, so here's this! I hope it's enough to forgive me guys HAHA! hope you'll enjoyyyy, let's see where this will lead. 3k+ words.
Warnings: Blood, cursing, blood curdling domesticity (natasha being so soft and idiot), Y/n being a material wife (fuck her parents)
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Natasha's POV:
I saw how those familiar eyes widen, a spatula went in front of her, as if she was trying to hide from me by putting it on her chest. I swallowed a bump on my throat, mentally cursing myself for how I reacted. Of course, she'll be here. God, Natasha.
"I-... I was- I was just... Ms. Maria said I- I can cook the nuggets..." It came out almost as a question. I falter for a moment before regaining my composure back.
If money could make the ground to swallow me whole, that would where my billions will go. Gosh, am I drunk?
"Sorry... I'm sorry..." Those words left my mouth with no hesitation, making me falter once again. Why am I saying sorry? I don't apologize. Especially not under the roof I own and not to some... stranger. "I thought... I thought you were somebody, I'm really sorry..." I mentally face palm, biting my tongue as my inner turmoil just got louder. I mean, how can I stop apologizing when she look so... those eyes! I mean...Ugh, I'm going mad.
"Go on, you can... finish your—whatever you're cooking." I immediately turned to leave just in time when Maria step in the kitchen, a phone in hand and a frown on her face.
"Did you shout?" Fuck.
"Follow me." I commanded, walking past her without bothering to excuse myself.
I saw in my peripheral vision how the new presence that is with us put her head down, making the nagging feeling inside my chest flutter even more. As I walked away, my hearing caught the words that left Maria's mouth.
"Don't worry about her, you just eat whatever you want, okay? I'll be right outside in the balcony." I could imagine a small smile playing on her face, making me roll my eyes.
I marched towards the balcony, mixed feelings clouding my mind as a small headache started to hit me. Gosh, she's already here? Why wasn't I notified? Wait... Maybe, I was? But, if I am, I could've remembered it!
"Why the hell is she here?" I whispered in a shout as I face away from her, looking out in the view before us, both of my arms on the railings. I couldn't let her see my face, and notice that I'm in a turbulence inside my mind.
"What do you mean? I've already told you that last night before you went out with those two girls...." I winced as I remembered how I decided to pick two last night, wondering if it could help me out of the mess I'm in. Still, I kicked them out before I could even close the door of one of  the rooms inside that bar I go to. "...You even told me you'll be picking her up, Nat. But, I've received your phone calls, I couldn't reach you so I decided to do it myself-" Feeling irritated, I faced her with so much confusion and annoyance visible in my face.
"Maria, you can't take initiatives on such things like this! She's mine to think about—she—she's my problem for god's sake!" Mentally, I was taken aback by the things I have said. I wondered if it's my first time telling her something like this, but I chose to not falter. I saw how her eyes widened a little, not ignoring the flash of hurt that ran around it.
"What the fuck, Nat? Since when did it become a problem with me cleaning your dirt? Doing your work? She's yours to think about, but did you see how you handled her earlier? No shit, Romanoff, you yelled at her! Did you even see how startled she was? She's here, somewhere foreign to her and with people she barely knew." I gulped down the saliva on my throat, suddenly finding it hard to talk about and find the right words to stand still and claim my dominant towards her.
"What's been happening to you, Natalia? You're not doing like yourself this past couple of days..." I heard her claimed a long breath before exhaling it out. "If it's about work, tell me and I'll handle it. About your family? Your dad? Tell me and I'll help you, we'll help you. We're not your enemies here, come on. We've come so far together already... I'm not a stranger." With that, a gust of wind passed by me as she walked out the huge sliding door. That was when I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding still.
Am I losing my mind? Maria was right, I am not myself. I just couldn't understand what is happening. Everything feels too much and it angers me how I can't even resolve my own problem.
I turned to catch a glimpse of what moved in my peripheral vision. I watched as the two woman inside the penthouse talk to each other, gazing down, there's was a small plate of chicken nuggets in Y/n's hand, offering it to Maria. A flutter crossed my chest, I couldn't help but to clear my throat as I looked away, trying to take my attention to other things outside. But, even the birds and the skies couldn't compel to the face of an angel right here before me.
Looking back, I saw Y/n looking down now, I frowned, thinking of what they might be talking about. Raising her hand, Maria pat her head, resulting to my frown deepening. After that, she said some words that made Y/n look up with those doe eyed gaze. I held a breathe when Y/n walked towards Maria, closing the distance between them and hugging her.
I started to walk inside, my hands itching to grab something...someone— oh stop it. My feet faltered when I saw Maria raised her arms and reciprocated the intimate gesture. Hell, I don't even remember when I last hugged that woman and she's letting some random girl hug her after meeting for a few hours?
Deciding to stop the bullshit, if you could call it that, I made my way inside the penthouse, I was at a distnce when just in time, they pulled away from each other. Clearing my throat, they both looked at me, Maria stepping back instantly, holding a bowl in her hand.
"Maria, go get Clint on the phone and tell here to deal with New York and let Bucky deal with Budapest. I'm not feeling very well, I'm taking the day off." After that, I turned my gaze towards Y/n who was looking down, picking at her hands. I rolled my eyes mentally, before walking past them— between them. One of my hand automatically took the bowl away from Maria's hold as I marched upstairs towards my room. I could feel her eyes burning holes in the back of my head, but I couldn't careless. It was my money that bought this, and there's so much food there, they could just cook again.
Maybe, a day off is all that I need.
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Y/n's POV:
"Well, I'm gonna go for now. I'll come back later and I'll check on you—do you have a phone? Maybe, I can get your number so it'll be easier for you to ask me if you need something." I looked up at Maria as she started speaking, shaking my head after she finished asking.
"I- uh... I don't have one..." I gulped when she squinted her eyes at me in a way that I don't understand. "But- but, I do have a laptop... I just- I don't have any socials... can I text you through my laptop?" I asked, and it took a moment before she responded.
"No, I uh... Oh! we hand that landline here..." She pointed at the telephone by the kitchen counter that was sitting on the far corner, and smiled slightly, feeling better to see that there's a telephone. That, I could use. "And we also have that somewhere in the living room, don't worry, I'll request Natasha to put one up in your room while we wait to buy you a phone, okay?" I nodded, smiling up at her before I remembered something.
"Oh, do-do you want me to cook you nuggets? Or I-" I was cut of by her.
"Don't worry about it, I'm not that hungry. I should get going now, I'll write down my number for you first... wait." She walked away, and I was left in the kitchen. I let out a sigh I didn't know I was holding as I sit on one of the stools she have here. It was so big, everything and everywhere is so big.
The nuggets are great! Does every nuggets here on New York taste like this? Is this some kind of special nuggets? Speaking of nuggets, I look towards where Natasha had disappeared from the corner.
Maybe she's in her room, Maria pointed it out to me earlier, does she want more nuggets? She said she was not feeling very well, maybe I could cook her some more foods? Bring her meds?
"Here." Maria gave me a piece of 1 sheet paper, there were two numbers. "The first one is my number and the second one is Natasha's, just in case she's not here and you need something. And, by the way, if she bothered you don't mind too much about it, she's just- she's just like that." I just nodded along the words she let out, still sitting on the stool so I was looking up at her.
"Would you—should I... uhmmm... Can I bring Natalia more foods? Maybe she needs medicine, or... or anything? I can do it." I asked politely, my hands fumbling around the paper she gave me. I didn't said anything wrong, right? That's what Mama and Dada said, to take care of Natasha, to look after her, to give her anything she needs. Anything she wants.
"Oh, uhh, I don't know about that. She can handle herself. You just make yourself at home, alright? Rest if you need to, I'll be back before you know it." I nodded once again, standing up as I went in for a hug.
She's very welcoming, very kind towards me. I've never met a stranger be this kind to me, it makes me miss home, miss Lucy. I just really need a hug right now and hugging Maria felt right.
Only one of her arms wrapped around me, and I pulled away. "I'm sorry if I kept hugging you—I hope I'm not making you feel uncomfortable... I just... I really need it." I explained, looking anywhere but her eyes.
"It's fine, don't worry." She pat my head before straightening out her shirt. "I should go now, we wouldn't want a dragon showering me with fire." I giggled at what she said and nodded as she started walking away.
"Take care, Ms. Maria. Thank you so much." I said gratefully, waving my hand at her.
She shook her head and waved back before disappearing into a corner. I sighed as I was left on my own thoughts, what can I do for the rest of the day? Can I watch TV? Natalia is here with me, maybe I could get to know her more? Looking around, I glanced at the clock and saw that it's almost past lunch time. Has she eaten already? Maybe she was hungry that's why she took the nuggets.
Standing up, I walked to the fridge, deciding to see what I could cook for her, or maybe for Maria also for when she get home later. There's so many foods here, all of them are fresh and well restocked, I wonder if it's all new.
Sighing, I stood up and look into nothingness, facing where Natasha had left earlier. Should I go check on her? Will it be okay? I'm just gonna check on her only. Golly, maybe she's sleeping? I suddenly jumped at the sound of thump and a sprained curse coming through the hallway.
Worry filled my head so I quickly closed the fridge and ran to where it was coming from. Turning on the corner, I saw Natasha with a vase broken into pieces around her feet. My eyes widened as I yelp her name.
"Natalia! Are you okay?" I asked as I watched her clutching her feet. She's in the exact corner, was she coming to the kitchen? I didn't hear her footsteps.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck... fucking hell!" My eyes widened more and I immediately raised my hand to support her body, but no doubt in my that I would come tumbling around with her if she ever did fell down. She's strong and... big!
"Your feet is bleeding! Golly! Come on, let me help you get to the living." Her hand automatically took a hold of mine while she kept cursing. I just pretended to not hear it, if only I could close my ears but my hands are all full. "What happened to you? Where does it hurt? Golly." I rambled as we walked past the kitchen into the living room where I helped her sit down on the couch, her body almost pulling mine along as she did so.
I immediately stood up straight and ran to the kitchen. "Wait for me." I looked for a clean cloth and found nothing. "Do you have any first aid kit here?!" I yelled gently through the kitchen as I rummaged around.
"By the restroom!" She yelled out with a booming voice and I immediately went to the restroom near. I thankfully quickly found a clean cloth and a box of aid kit beside it, taking it in my hands I immediately ran back, putting it on her feet before I went back again to the kitchen to get a big bowl and then filled it with water.
"Just wait for me, Natalia!" I said in a hurry. I was already panicking, especially after seeing the blood stream going to the floor of her living room.
Golly, hurry up, Y/n!
Soon enough, I was sitting by her feet, my leg folded so I was practically sitting on my ankles. The first thing I did was to stop the bleeding, and then after that I cleaned it with the things available inside the kit for cleaning the wounds along with my bowl of water. She was quiet the whole time, if it were me, I would be crying. The wound is not that big but it is deep, but at the same time there were no stitcher needed.
Good thing Lucy taught me many things.
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3rd Person's POV:
As silence enveloped the surrounding of Natasha's living room, only the sound of Y/n's hand tending her foot was heard. The younger girl was too focused on mending what was hurt to notice the pair of green forest eyes gazing at her. The bumps running along Natasha's skin at the feeling her soft and gentle touch.
She's never been handled like this before, with so much care, so much... Gosh, she's thinking too much once again. Y/n's hand gracefully worked through helping Natasha's wound, while Natasha almost forgot what happened to her already.
"Uhmm..." Y/n cleared her throat, taking Natasha out of the trance she was in. "Would you... would you like something to eat?" Y/n asked, so soft that Natasha could possibly sleep at the sound of it. "How are you feeling? Do you need anything?" Y/n rambled as she rolled the gauze around Natasha's foot.
There was a moment of silence, Y/n could feel herself getting nervous, already wishing to take back what she said. Suddenly, Natasha ask, "Where did you learn that?"
"Lucy—she's my... uhm... my caregiver. She's been with me since I was a baby. She uh... she thought me many things, including this." Y/n said and Natasha couldn't help but hear the longingness lacing through her voice. There was a certain sadness that Natasha couldn't pinpoint. But, she chose to not ask anything, feeling that it might be a sensitive topic.
"Ahhhh... Lucille, right?" Y/n's head snapped up at her, her eyes filled with wonder. Their face was inches far away from each other as Natasha was leaning forward.
"You know her?" Y/n asked before looking down, as if shying away from Natasha's deep gaze.
"Yeah, I do. Been so long since I last talked to her... I was maybe... 8 or 10 above I don't know." There was an anomaly in Natasha's voice, a certain softness as she shared something she didn't know she would share. It was a very long time, she's not usually like this, sharing something to someone. But, it felt right as those words automatically came out her mouth.
Y/n was silent, only nodding her head as a reply but Natasha could see the gears working through her head. "Aren't you hot?" Natasha blurted, suddenly.
"Hmm?" Y/n asked, looking up while holding Natasha's foot.
Natasha gazes at the girl's face, from how her eyebrows were raised in question and how her eyes circled in wonder. Her pink mouth agape as her nose widens a little in every breath. "You're wearing a sweater and pants. You're all covered up." Natasha said, her eyes focused on Y/n's lips.
Y/n is not an idiot, she sensed how Natasha's eyes raked her face, shying away, she looked down, deciding to finish mending her feet. "I'm uh... no, I'm fine." Now, Natasha observed that there was an edge on her voice, as if wanting to drop the topic down.
Full of wonder, Natasha thought. She's mysterious but at the same time she's an open book, full of words that Natasha is yet to dicover. She could only wonder what lies beneath the cover.
"There. All done. Stay here, I'll clean the vase-would you like something first? Water?..." Y/n started cleaning up the mess she made while mending Natasha's foot. "Anything?" Looking up to see Natasha's burning gaze still on her.
"No. No, nothing..." Y/n nodded and said a small 'okay', standing up with the things in her hand.
"If you need me just call out, okay? You just stay here and don't put any pressure on that, it might start bleeding." Y/n explained before disappearing into the kitchen.
Natasha was left in her own thoughts, her eyes not leaving the vacant space where the young girl had disappeared. What the hell just happened? There were no awkwardness around them, maybe Y/n's shying away, but beyond that it was... comfortable. Natasha felt comfortable... she felt fuzzy, as if those splitting moments were merely a dream.
Is she dreaming?
She could hear Y/n walking around behind her, then the sound of the glass being picked up. It was as if all her senses was focused on the girl, and she let it be as she rest on the sofa.
Before she knew it, she was already napping on her million dollar couch, her heart beating in a soft beat for the first time as her mind was somehow at peace while she uses the soft and gentle movement of the girl as a music to fall asleep on.
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Author's Note: Here you go, everyone! Hope I could finish the next one already, mwehehehehe, thank you so much! and so sorryyyy for making you wait. (⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠)
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moonbaetarot · 8 months ago
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Pick a pile
What makes you a good person
1. 2. 3.
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Pile 1
Your a peaceful person you like to keep your peace. Your someone who goes with the flow your ok with change and new things even if your scared of a situation you know it’s all going to be ok. You stay true to yourself you’re not flashy you don’t flex your money or newest finest things you have. You see things from every perspective you’re not quick to judge you know everyone comes from different paths in lives and may see things differently. You may have struggled with mental health, anxiety or depression in your childhood or teen years this really played a part in who you are today. You may be a teacher or want to be a teacher of some sort or had a teacher in your life who you looked up to I’m getting miss honey and Matilda vibes. You make what seems impossible possible. Someone here could be 22. You have a lot of stability you’re ready for anything. You see everything as an opportunity. You don’t let people get in the way of your path in life. You know how defend your self you usally don’t tho if someone says something about you you just like I feel sad for them like “you must be miserable to hate on me” but if you need to defend yourself you’ll snap and get your point across.
Thank you for reading loves! 🤍
Pile 2
Being a good person may feel hard sometimes. it’s like you do everything for everyone and get nothing back. You over work yourself for people who don’t deserve nothing from you. You’re worrying about pleasing others over your own happiness. You may feel like being a good person gets you nowhere. (I’m sorry love if someone in your life and doesn’t appreciate you you need to cut them off you deserve so much more then people who don’t appreciate all you do, you are so important and you will find someone that will appreciate you.) You take care you others I’m getting empathetic energy like if someone around you is sick your fast to get them whatever they need because you remember what it’s like to be sick so you wanna help them get better. You stay committed your very goal oriented if you put your mind to something you’re doing anything to get there. Someone here may be very close to their grandma or used to when they were little. You find a way to see the joy in fun in life even when things aren’t easy. You’re good at giving advice you know just what to say in any situation. Someone here may have very long hair or like to their elbow. You know how to keep a promise. You need to learn to cut people out your life love someone in your life isn’t good for you.
Thank you for reading loves! 🤍
Pile 3
You use past situations to help better yourself. You work well with other people and groups. People see you as approachable you have a very friendly energy about you that makes people wanna talk and be friends with you. I feel like you’re a very good friend always checking up on people making sure everyone’s ok and making sure no one feels left out when y’all hangout. I feel that sometimes your face may say other wise tho lol someone here may have a rbf or just look mad or tired sometimes. You are good in relationships you were made to me a lover I’m hearing “best I ever had”. When you have kids you’re going to be the best parent you are going to love those kids so much And unconditionally. I feel like having kids is going to change you for the better if there things you don’t like or flaws you have become a parent is going to change all of that. I feel like you’re a trustworthy person people trust you with many things. You look out for people you love and protect them from people with ill intentions Your able to see the bad in people and they will think there slick and getting away with it but you see right through them. You have a mothering healing energy people feel safe around you being around you just feels like a big hug. You have a very soft submissive girly energy.
Thank you for reading loves! 🤍
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viviennevermillion · 1 year ago
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My boyo. He's so adorable but SOOOO deranged it's not even funny. Like how do you work for human traffickers to make up for your inescapable poverty, use your magic to turn people into puppets to sell, enchant them to participate in a whimsical musical number for no reason but your own personal amusement, tell the terrified victims over loudspeaker how shit you think they are, let yourself be enraged by a bunch of sassy high schoolers and then decide by the end of the day, to quote my dear friend Azul Ashengrotto, I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE!!! How does one go from trafficking children to wanting to found a school for magicless children in the span of 24 hours. How do you manage to escape a probably exploitative work contract AND steal your bosses' property in the span of 24 hours with nothing but 1 madol and a dream? How's he going to fund this school? He apparently has to be worried about getting enough to eat. How do you just go "you're right, no more trafficking children, from now on I'm gonna commit to the good of humanity :)"
His lesson from the whole thing was "actually schools are good!" rather than "wow I feel so bad for all the people I probably sold :/"
There is not a sane bone in his body and no rational thought in his brain. His thoughts probably contain so much cursing that the sentences are unintelligible when you censor them. Everytime he speaks to a person he doesn't like, he internally adds "you mediocre little fuckshit pissbabies" or similar to the end of the statements. He has the most deranged evil laugh ever. Even when he likes you and you tell him a funny joke he goes "hehehahahaaAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAH" like he's about to kill someone. He likes having his little ears scratched. He bites though.
He's like the biggest asshole cat you can mentally picture. He doesn't just push stuff off your shelves, he takes the vases and chucks them at unsuspecting pedestrians. He's mad at you and you ask him for a glass of milk and he takes the milk carton out of the fridge and pours the entire thing all over the floor and kitchen counters without breaking eye contact. There's a collection of knives on his bedroom wall.
He's my special little guy. They want to study him to update the DSM-5. He eats the rich. He needs some money to found his little school so he gotta work in retail, scanning the customers' products at checkout and muttering "fucking bourgeoisie cockroach" under his breath. Shamelessly lists "amusement park manager" and "salesman" in his CV as if he worked at a legitimate business. He once had a mental breakdown at the grocery store after closing hour and downed a bottle of whiskey straight from the shelf and then danced through the snack aisle stabbing his cane into the chips bags out of boredom while singing "you're never fully dressed without a smile". Gidel being mute is the only reason this kid does not curse like an uncensored Rapper version of Ebenezer Scrooge.
He's clinically insane. He's the most wondrous attraction at Playful Land. He hopes the afterlife is a musical. He's Fellow Honest. This is a fake name.
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blueninjablade3 · 4 months ago
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Yandere Frollo Alphabet
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Real quick for my regular readers who are waiting for the Hades Angst I’m working on it at a snails pace but it’s shaping up nicely. I’m publishing this solely because it’s been in my drafts taunting me.
TW: Yandere themes, Slurs/ talks about slurs, genocide, medieval torture, isolation, abuse, gaslight, lack of right, racism, and religious themes.
If you are uncomfortable with any of this scroll on. I won’t be offended. If you are in a bad mental state I don’t recommend reading this Yandere relationships are extremely toxic and dangerous. If you or someone you love are in an abusive relationship, please remember you have resources to help you. I believe I’ve covered most of my bases so without further ado Yandere Frollo alphabet. Ps, left a little music if anyone wants to listen to that while they read.
Affection: how do they show you love and affection? How intense can It get?
I view Frollo somewhat like “I never quite learned to verbalize my feelings so I’m going to do very small things to tell you I love you.” Also, he brings you grapes. It’s every day he brings you grapes. (Unless you’re getting punished.) He does do the traditional kiss-your-cheek and forehead tho.
Blood: How dirty is he willing to get when it comes to you?
He’s willing to burn down all of Paris to find you. You and Esmeralda are gonna be best friends and shit talk Frollo together.
Cruelty: how will they treat you once kidnapped will he mock you?
Yes. Wtf do you think I would say “No he’s an angel” Brother has no problem calling someone a slur. Hell, I’d put money on the fact that he’d call a black person the N word hard R to their face. (He’s seriously the worst tho. Get y’all a man like… uh Prince Naveen. He’ll treat you better)
Darling: besides kidnapping you would he do anything else against your will?
Being an active part of the Romani people’s slaughter, being horrible to Quasi, and whipping people are the ones that are off the top of my head. I’m probably missing others but the point is he absolutely would.
Exposed: How much of his heart do you bear?
I think you actually bear 40%. The other 60 goes to the Bible and Christ. Don’t worry that’s still more than his family ever got.
Fight: How would he feel if you fought back?
CHOOSE ME OR YOUR PYRE BE MINE OR YOU WILL BURN~! But in all seriousness, he’s going to be so upset and do the same thing that he does to Quasi.
Game: Is this a Game to them? Would he like watching his darling try to escape?
No! This isn’t a game! Those filthy gypsies can’t be trusted! (it feels wrong even typing that 😭) They’ll harm you! You need to stay safe. In the bell tower.
I also don’t think he’d enjoy you escaping. He wants you at arm’s length at all times.
Hell: Your worst experience with him.
After one of your little “stunts” he had you flogged for a few hours and then you didn’t get lunch for a few days. (like three)
Ideals: what he sees in the future with you.
He sees a traditional Christian marriage (pretend male x male relationships were most of the time accepted by the church), a couple of NORMAL kids (he is the worst), and all the Romani people dead. (ICK)
Jealousy: does he get jealous and if he does, does he find a way to cope or will he lash out?
He gets very jealous and never controls it. He always lashes out. At this point, don’t even look at a fly anymore. He’ll get jealous of it.
Kisses: How does he act around you?
He’s possessive, creepy, and lustful. Think about how he behaves with Esma and multiply by two.
Love letters: how would he go about courting/approaching you?
He’s very traditional. He’s the type who’d buy a goat to give to your dad and then just be like “Gimme.” But he would approach you beforehand and have some small talk in passing.
Mask: Are his truth colors different from what people think?
No. He’s very publicly creepy and weird it seems. People also fear him and view him as dangerous which you can say firsthand is true. Creepy bitch.
Naughty: how would he punish you?
He’s the type to flog you for a little, isolate you, and then limit food consumption. You’re extremely afraid of acting out or acting against him for fear of his reaction.
Oppression: what rights did he take away from you:
Freedom, religion (if you’re anything other than Roman Catholic you’ll have to practice and pray in secret.), privacy, and if you’re American the right to bear arms. Really any weapons he’ll take away. (Maybe see if you can hide a dagger?)
Regret: does he regret kidnapping you? Will he ever let you go?
Haha! You’re so funny if you think he’d let you go or think he’d regret kidnapping you! The Lord brought you two together! You two were meant to be! Now stop struggling unless you wanna go back to the palace of justice.
Sigma: what brought this side of him?
I think his lust, pride, and lack of getting any bitches over his years all contributed. He got lustful for you, and he didn’t know how to react, then instead of admitting that he was in the wrong his pride got the best of him, and blamed you. When his lust won caused his Yandere actions.
Tears: how would he feel if you cried screamed or Isolated yourself?
He doesn’t care! You’ll learn to love him eventually. If you don’t… you won’t like what’s gonna happen. But do go ahead.
Unique: is there anything different from a normal Yandere
He has a massive superiority complex? He also can have people flogged and not be questioned.
Vice: what can you use to escape him?
I’m not quite sure. I guess maybe you could hide in the court of miracles?
Witts end: would he ever hurt you
Without a second thought.
Xoanon: how much does he revere/worship you and to what extent is he willing to go to win you over
He’s willing to go to extreme lengths. I know I’ve talked a lot of shit about him in this but in all seriousness, he views you as a gift from the heavens. An angel sent to him. His angel.
Yearn: How long before he snapped and kidnapped you?
He’s a patient man. I’m going to say if you play your cards right and Quasi is still young about 1.5 years till he snaps.
Zenith: would he ever break you?
Oh definitely.
Thank you for reading! Please remember that rebloging, likes and comments are much appreciated! ❤️
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sadistic-kiss · 6 months ago
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Nanami Knows Best
What's Best
Nanami is tired of your poor choice of men so he takes matters into his own hands. 
TAGS: Dubious Consent, Knife Play, Degrading, Dacryphilia, Bondage, Praise
Genre: Some Angst, Dark Romance, Possessive, Obssessive 
Yandere/Slasher Nanami x Reader
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Your giggles tickle Nanami’s ears like little bell chimes. He always enjoyed it when you laughed or smiled. It made him feel warm. However, he wasn't feeling that sweet delight that squeezed his heart… not right now. Right now he was feeling irritated. Pissed. All because he wasn't the cause of such a beautiful laugh, no it was the mouth breather who had his arm slung around your shoulder. 
“Guys this is Mahito.” You introduced the bluette to the group with an excited chirp.
"Sup!"
Jerk number five. 
“Nice to meet you Mahito~.” Gojo shook the man’s hand as he greeted each person.
“So you're the guy I've been hearing so much about?” Shoko winked.
“I hope all good things.” Mahito looked toward you with a smirk. 
“Of course!” You shimmy into him playfully. “You're my perfect man~.”
Your newest boyfriend. 
After rounding the table the man reached his weird stitched hand toward him. Where did you find this one out of the mental hospital? He disregarded his hand giving him a nod instead. “Nanami.” 
“Oo~ Nanami is a bit weird with germs.” you whispered quickly trying to ease the tension between them. He wasn't weird with germs but he allowed you to think that so he didn't have to physically interact with waste. 
“No worries! Germaphobe Kento huh?” 
“Nanami.”he corrected.
“I heard so much about you!” the drunk disrespectful bastard continued, “Heard you were real smart and all, a true brainy guy. Like the big-headed kid from the cartoons uuuuh...” he began to snap his fingers, “John- Josh-”
”Jimmy Neutron!” you laughed as the two of you busted up in a cackle. 
“Yeaaah! Jimmy Neutron!”
Nanami let out a short snort as he sipped his drink. The table giggled in drunken fun. After that little joke, he allowed everyone else to talk. Mahito would pick on him but he never bit back. Never took the obvious bait. Nanami was quiet, always had been. You learn more about someone by watching them closely. People were like open books, you just needed to know how to read them. 
Nanami likes to observe, and as he scrutinized your new boy toy he wanted to roll his eyes. He truly wasn't impressed with this one. The rest of the table seemed fine with him but that's because they were too oblivious to see how textbook this whole thing was. It always started like… this. The cute little honeymoon phase where you introduce the new guy to your friends and they gush and get excited for you. Where you ignore all the obvious red flags and let them slap you in the face. 
It was pitiful honestly. 
The guy could say anything and you'd give him whatever. Money, time, ass, your damn dignity. Just like the rest of them. You let these deadbeats in and they take and take from you until you have nothing more to give and when they leave you broken and crying you run to Shoko. Last time, Shoko was away so you had called him. 
You cried and cried and vowed to never do this to yourself again- he truly believed you yet look at you now. You silly... silly girl. You always do this don't you? It's like you can't help it. You were a smart woman. No debt, great credit score, graduated college early, paid for all your things, and shine in your career. You worked really hard to get to where you were. Summer classes, extra credit, internships, volunteering, you name it. You built yourself up and now you were letting homeless idiots break you down. You were booksmart but you were not street smart. 
Unfortunately, you followed the very trope of- good girl dates bad guy. You think you can change them huh? Give them a place to crash when the go on a drug binge and as they steal your money and lie to you you just nod and smile thinking you see the good in them. When were you going to grow out of it? Aren't you too old for this? Whatever happened to 'fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me? What the hell is fool me five times? 
Clearly, you were sick in the head to be going down this same path again for the fifth time. 
More sick than he was, and that was really saying something. He wiped the earth with scum bags like your shitty boyfriends. He even enjoyed doing it. However, he was an honest man to himself and his disturbing hobbies.
He enjoyed killing but it was best when done to someone that he felt was a waste of oxygen. 
He wasn't a sociopath- he was a psychopath. There was a difference. He had his little morals. He didn't like killing those who didn't deserve it. Only people who thought they could shit on the world with no consequences. Cocky bastards… much like all the men you seem to be a magnet for.
So, as he watches you with yet another dirtbag, he begins to wonder how delightful it would be to cut this one's life short. Just like he did with all your other poor choices. You just didn't get it. Couldn't see what they truly were. You always joked about your third eye but you were blind to these things that were lesser than men. They didn't deserve you, but you keep picking them up.
Was it your daddy issues? Mommy issues? Both?
Nanami truly thought the time he spent with you crying after your last breakup would have sparked something within you. He was a model man. Everything opposite of the strays you take in off the street. If anything you should have seen how perfect he was for you. How much better he could treat you. Jealous? He wouldn't quite say that. He was more...how should he say...disappointed. He would have felt much better if you came into this bar with a man who was more his status or at least someone who had a higher IQ than a fifth grader.
"ALRIGHT! LET'S GET THIS TRIVIA GAME STARTED!" 
Speaking of iQ, he can't wait to see how many questions this one gets wrong. The last one was 8/10 for questions wrong- not right. He got only two answers. Will this one be a knockout? 
The announcer yelled into the mic making the crowd cheer and holler as they raised their glass into the air excited to start the game. 
Mahito elbowed him in the side, "Win this one for us aye Jimmy Neutron."
Nanami's lip twitched as he gave him a half smile. At that moment your boyfriend sealed his fate. Hammering the last nail into his coffin. Who was he kidding, he nailed it in when he decided to date you.
~
You swayed and giggled as Mahito helped you into your house. 
"Careful babe." He caught you before you could slip and eat your stone steps.
"Sorry sorry~ I had one too many margaritas!" You hold on to him as you kick your stilettos off your feet. You were already home so you didn't mind going barefoot the rest of the way. 
Climbing up your stairs you dug into your purse to grab your keys with jingly accessories upon them. You open the door and lean against it letting your guest in. You smiled at him while he turned the lamp on. You had such a fun night and you felt something was so different about this one. Your friends even liked him. Though they were pissed he got some questions wrong- easy ones-matter of fact you don't think he answered anything correctly- despite that! You still felt it was a good night. Closing the door behind you, you stalk over to him and throw your arms around his neck.
"Ooo~I know that look, did I do good tonight?"
You smiled with a flirtatious flutter of your lashes, "Yes~ Yes you did." You reach on your tiptoes as you kiss him, nearly making him tip over the couch.
Mahito hummed wrapping his arms around your hips, about to take this to the next level but his phone began to ring. He pulled back from you with a peck, "Ah~" He hissed looking at his phone, "Give me a minute work is calling." 
You pout giving him puppy eyes, "This late at night? Can't you let it ring?" You reach for him again but he untangles your arms from around him with a light chuckle. 
"I'm always on call, you know how business is. Go wait for me." He smacked your ass while walking toward the door.
"Don't take long!" You giggle running to your room to put something sexy on.
Mahito stepped out onto your porch, answering the phone. "Hey baby?"
"When are you coming over~"
"I can't tonight, I gotta..." He looked around while licking his lip, "Do a late-night delivery."
Nanami was listening as he hid in the dark, your new boyfriend spoke to what he had deduced was another girl... or boy. Whatever the case it was clear he was cheating on you and then lying to both of you. Well, the guy just made this a whole lot easier. Guess that was the one perk of you dating trash, it was easy to get rid of.
Once the call came to an end Nanami made his move. Mahito opened the door when he caught the man around his neck with his knife and then dragged him in with a hand clasped over his lips. Nanami shut the door with his back, leaning against it while he held the dying gurgling man. His eyes were wide as they looked upon him in shock. 
"She deserves better than you." Nanami made sure to send the man to the afterlife with his stone-cold eyes as the last thing he saw. He watched an arrangement of emotions flicker across before Mahito went still. He wished he could have basked in his taunting screams like the others but this was new. He has never done… this. In your house. About to confront you. He thought it was about time you truly opened your third eye and saw reality. 
Nanami dragged the man with him as he walked toward your room, pausing in the hallway mirror. He adjusted his bloody jacket and combed his blonde hair back with his fingers, flashing his teeth to make sure nothing was in them. When he was satisfied he knocked on your door with two sharp taps.
"Come in~" You called from inside.
He twisted the knob and pushed it, allowing the door to swing open the rest of the way.
You had a smile on your face, sitting in bed wearing a see-through baby doll gown. When you realized it was him and not the garbage man, your expression morphed into horror.
"N-Nanami!" You scurried up on your knees with your mouth wide open. Eyes darting to the body that he was pulling into your room. He plopped down on your bed with a tired sigh, flicking out his handkerchief as if he had just gotten off of work. 
You open your lips wide about to scream but he grabs your calf while holding the knife to his lips, "Don't. I've already had a long night with your one-brain cell boyfriend." He let go of you before he snorted to himself, "Sorry, your ex." Using his white handkerchief he began to wipe his bloody knife with smooth delicacy.
"Why-why Nanami?!"
"He was trash sweetheart. All of them were."
"A-all? Wh-what are you talking about?"
"Every single one you pick." He looked at you like a disappointed father. "I'm about sick of it. It’s obvious you're too stupid to realize it. Letting these leeches into your life. At some point, you'd think you were enjoying it! How about that? Do you enjoy being treated like crap? Enjoy letting pigs treat your home like a sty they can smoke their crack pipe at?"
Your lip trembled as you watched him clean his knife, "A-are you going to k-kill me?"
Nanami shook his head in disbelief as he scratched some blood off the steel, did you not listen to a word he just said? Honestly, sometimes you can be so dense. You’re lucky you’re cute. "No, I'm not going to kill you sweetheart." He looked up at you just in time to see your eyes land on your phone that was plugged into the charger. He saw the way you nervously gulped before looking at him. 
He raised a blonde brow at you. Were you really about to-
You dashed for your phone but he was quicker. He lunged forward and slapped the device across the room but you took that moment to pick up your lamp and toss it at him. He growled, blocking it with his arm, the glass cutting him. You released a scream while running. You barely jumped over the lump of flesh on the ground before he caught you by your hair and yanked you back into the room. 
“Ah! HELP HELP ME!”
"Enough!" He yelled at you as he wrestled you onto your bed.
You kicked and screamed as he quickly got you under control. He shoved his handkerchief into your mouth and grabbed your hands together with one hand. Swiftly he unbuckled his pants with one hand and yanked it out of the loop to tie around your wrist and the bedpost. He yanked on it making sure it was tight, and to be double sure you weren't getting out he jiggled your arm, searching for any open space. He then sat on the side of your bed with a release of air. Glancing at his forearm he picked out pieces of your lamp from his skin and tossed it to the floor. 
“Tch- ". He pulled out the last piece looking at you. 
Your sniffling and choked sobs are what caught his attention. He couldn't help how absolutely beautiful you looked even with precious tears streaming down your cheeks. He cooed as he took out the bloody handkerchief, from your mouth. "What's wrong sweetheart? Why are you crying?"
"Are you..." You gawked at him before giving him an angry stern look. "Y-You killed Mahito!"
Nanami scoffed leaning over the bed so he could pick up Mahito's phone. "Ah, your boyfriend?" He typed in the easy password that he had seen the leech put in. 6969. Fucking childish. He then went to his text message to girlfriend number two and flipped it over to show you. "What do you see?"
You gasped at the text messages, and nude pictures being sent between the two. Mahito said dirty things about the girl as she reciprocated the flirting. You snapped your head away too distraught to see such a thing. 
The blonde grabbed your cheeks, turning your head so you could look at the evidence. "What do you see?" He asked again more sternly. 
You sniffed, "I see I see!"
"What! Do you see?"
"I SEE THE NUDE PICTURES!" You cried with more hot tears bubbling in your orbs.
"What's the date?"
"T-Today! It's- it's today...." You began to cry as Nanami moved the phone from your face. Your boyfriend is dead, the guy you saw as a friend killed him, and now you found out you were being cheated on- was there anything else to bury you in? This was all too much! You were sobbing now, choking on your saliva and trying to sniffle so you could breathe, but it was so hard to breathe. 
Nanami pet your cheek with the back of his knuckles. "There you go... good girl let it all out...it's okay." 
"I-I'm sorry N-Nanami you are r-right- why does this happen to me..." You cried through your words hoping to pull on sympathy strings.
Nanami kissed you on your forehead as he spoke more to himself than anything. "You just can't help yourself sweetheart it's not your fault..." He moved to kiss your wet cheek. "I'll make sure it never happens again."
His words made your eyes widen along with his lips connecting with your own. 
"HM!" You tensed up shutting your eyes tight, your hands jerked to push him away but his belt didn't let up. What the hell does he think he's doing!? His lips slotted into yours as he shifted on top of you. You felt his tongue touch you and, you let it slip in your mouth. He moaned as he licked your tongue but then you clamped your teeth making him rear back in shock.
"Mm..."He touched his bloodied tongue. Surprised to see the red liquid on his fingers. "You bit me." He stated matter of factly. 
"Don't touch me!" You spat his blood at him. "You're a murderer! 
He was calm and then he wasn't. He grabbed your face pressing his fingers into your cheeks as he shook your head back and forth. "I know what I am darling but do you know what you are?"
You did your best to glare at him as you mewled in discomfort, your cheeks being pressed into your eyes. You weren't even able to answer his question, but he did.
"You're a dirty little whore that can't go one single day without being fucked."
You gasp in shock.
"Oh don't do that. You get dumped by one man you're looking for the next to warm your bed. How long did you know this one? Less than a month? How long did it take you before you were throwing on this slutty outfit that you wear for every man?" He flicked the fabric for emphasis.
You felt your chest squeeze in pain as your resolve began to decay, you didn't expect him to be so mean- hell you didn't expect any of this from kind sweet Nanami Kento! It was like a whole new person was above you. Nanami rolled his eyes at you, "Nothing hm...figures." He dragged his other hand over your body until he reached in between your legs. You gasp feeling him slide two digits against your slit. "You only think with this don't you?"
"What-what are you-ah!" You flinch feeling him slip into you. You were so ashamed by how your body fluttered around the intrusion.
"This is all you can think about hm?" Nanami leaned his head so he could watch the pleasure flicker across your confused eyes.
"Y-You're wrong!"
"Give it a break. You don't want them because they treat you like a princess, you certainly don't want them for money." His fingers curled inside you, rubbing on something delightful. "You just use them for the sex and allow them to do the same to you. Why else do you think all your choices are terrible?"
"S-Stop!" You snatched your face from his fingers, your legs quivering as you let out a tight groan. The way he thrust and curled inside of you was causing your body to betray you. It shouldn't feel this good. "Ah~!" You try to jerk your hands from its binds but you only end up with shaft wrists.
"I can take care of you and more..." He pressed his thumb to your clit, your hips flinched. "Ah~" Nanami grinned, "Did you like that?"
"N-No!" You shout at him but he began to circle your clit expertly. "-Ah~" You bit your lip turning away from him.
He chuckled, "Now now, there's no need to lie...I can feel you clenching around me, go ahead and cum, it's what you want to do."
You squeezed your eyes tight denying this reality, doing your best to escape mentally. You didn't want to feel all this pleasure, but it was too difficult to ignore. From the blonde's taunting words in your ear and the squelch of your wet cunt you knew you were done for. 
You felt something cold touch your neck, it was the knife he used on Mahito, "Look at me. I want to see you when you squirt on me like the slut you are."
You kept your face away but you opened your eyes to glare at him from the side. The knife bites into your flesh like a mere paper cut.
He gave you a sort of soft smile, "You can enjoy it as much as you like, don't be ashamed sweetheart." 
It pissed you off how sweet he sounded. How those simple words sent shivers and butterflies. This man you thought was a friend was a damn killer! Yet you could feel the growing build-up of your orgasm. You began to shake your head trying to pull yourself away from those dangerous hands. 
"N-no no! Stop!"
"Stop? Why would I stop when you are so close my dear? Don't tell me you don't want to cum?"
"Ah-N-no no! I don't want to-mm-" You grit your teeth trying to hold yourself back.
Nanami chuckled low at you, "Sweetheart don't be so stubborn. Come on and be a good girl. Cum for me." His movements didn't let up and even though you did your best to fight, it was inevitable.
You came with a scream, hips lifting as you squirt upon this killer's hand. You felt good and then immediately regret. How could you cum...so much?
"Good girl..." Nanami used the knife to cut off your thin lingerie. "We are going to need to throw this one out my dear, I'll get you a new one. Just for me."
What? He was insane- You had no time to stew in that statement because he pulled his pants low enough to release his large leaking cock.
"N-Nanami!" You were shocked to see how blessed he was. "W-Wait! I-I can't!"
"Yes, I'm aware none of your boyfriends were as big as I am." The blonde pushed your legs up and pressed his tip to your cunt. "Gojo said that they oozed little dick energy and I am quite displeased with you darling, you couldn't even be a slut properly."
You let out a cry as he pushed into you, stretching you around his cock. Tears streaming down your cheeks, making the man moan. He loved seeing you cry. You found that out when you cried to him about your last boyfriend. You didn't want to believe he was hard because of your tears but now you could see- it turned him own.
 Nanami moaned deeply as he kissed the corner of both of your eyes, rolling his hips until he was fully inside you. More tears seemed to pour free, like a never-ending stream. You cried out of frustration- you cried for your dead exes and you cried because the bloody monster above you was making you feel unbelievably good. You hated how he slid in and out of you with no pain- you wish it hurt- you wished you weren't enjoying it.
"It's okay darling. "Nanami cooed sweetly. Let it all out. Cry as much as you want," He snapped his hips faster as you bit back your pleasurable moans. Your bed rocked as he fucked you into it. The psycho blonde talking to you. "They didn't deserve you-mm. None of them..." He panted. 
"N-Nanami~" You began to play into the pleasure, letting it take your moans. Maybe you could speed up this process. You circled your legs around him allowing him to get deeper. Soon your moans weren't 'fake' they were quite real. "Oh~ You feel so good! Ah~Please cum in me!" You cried.
Nanami saw right through your charade, if you thought he was cumming alone you were wrong. He pulled out of you so he could flip you onto your stomach, your arms awkwardly crossed in their binds.
He reentered you making your back arach, "AH!"
"Mm~ I know how much you love being treated like a slut. Beg for it." He slapped your ass as he fucked you from behind.
 Holy shit- 
Your eyes rolled while you moaned deeply. "Oh~P-Please Nanam!"
"Who do you belong to?"
"AH~" 
He slapped your ass again getting much more aggressive as he pulled on your hips and bounced you on his cock. 
"YOUR'S I'M YOUR SLUT PLEASE!" You'd like to say you were still playing along but as he grabbed your breast and smacked your ass like an alleyway whore you may have had a very real very intense orgasm. "Oh fuck-!" You hiss as you came, throwing your hips back so you could feel every part of him. He was long and thick and hit all the right places. Places you never even knew needed to be touched. 
Nanami quickly slipped out of you before you could milk him for all he's worth but once you settled he thrust right back inside, making you scream again. 
"I know my little whore needs more orgasms than two...don't worry... I'll make sure you are more than satisfied."
Trued to his damn word he made sure you were a panting mess by the end of the night. You could barely open your eyes as he finished, shooting his cum all over your face. Marking you with his seed. Despite the messy goop on you he grabbed your chin and kissed you deeply, slipping his tongue inside your mouth. Demanding you to submit to him. You didn't bite him this time, much too physically and mentally exhausted to do so.
Separating from your lips with a light smack he rubbed your chin sweetly, "Good girl, you took me so well."  
You weakly look at him with a pitiful, "Please release my hands..."
He reached up for his belt and loosened it for your arms to go free. You let out a breath of relief. Before you could rub your wrist Nanami grabbed them and massaged them for you. It was silent in your bedroom...until Mahito's phone dinged. Picking up the device, the blonde snorted and showed you the screen. It was yet another girl your dead ex was fooling around with. Girlfriend number three. You rolled your eyes looking away making Nanami laugh.
"It's not funny..." You muttered.
He pinched your cheek playfully, "Don't pout so much my sweet girl, I'll take care of you. I promise I won't let anyone else hurt you ever again. You are mine and I am yours."
"What if it's you... hurting me..." You blinked looking at his deep brown eyes.
He gave you a charming smile, "I said...anyone else...I do what's best for you." He cupped your cheek, "Because you don't know any better. I do. I know what's best."
You swallowed a harsh lump as reality became all too real. He was a lunatic and wasn't going to let you go. You didn't realize you were crying until he had moved for you.
"Shh...I'm here..." He scooped you up so he could hold you. Just over the mattress, you could see Mahito, lifeless and on the floor, but the whispering from the man behind you was both eerie and soothing at the same time. "I'm here now my sweet girl, let me worry about everything."
~Commission from anonymous ~
https://ko-fi.com/c/a12d45af4a
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semuji · 3 months ago
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₩arning: Yan? HSR x Kaslana! self-insert?, grammar mistakes, out of character, doomed yuri(?), kind of a harem...
Part 1: here
Expanding on the previous one...lore and shit 'cause I wanted to giggled.
Anyway, a little reminder, as a Kaslana, you are deemed to be gay or bisexual, so be prepared.
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In the past, you had your own kingdom. Your father was the previous king, your mother had died giving birth to you not long after. And so your father raised you on his own, teaching you about the goods and bads of the world, teaching you how to fight for your loved one and protect them at all cost in the name of the Kaslanas, The Knights and Shield of Humanity.
However, in a war with some Honkai Beasts, he died bravely, entrusting the kingdom and the life-long weapon of your family, which was a weapon of the Goddess your kingdom had been worshipping, "Atajina", had once held, to you. With that, you began leading the kingdom at the ripe age of 19.
You were a great leader, you had led your people to the war against the Swarms Disaster, later on leading the injured and the citizens to safety through the mountains. However, on the way, a woman accidentally dropped her baby down the hills below because of an argument between your mentally unstable comrades that was scared of the Swarms. The mother who was too surprised to even comprehend the situation, followed her son down the hills to protect him on instinct.
Being the only one who noticed that makes you rushed over to catch them, but instead got dragged down by gravity. Upon falling down, you could heard the screams of your comrades and the people who were worried for you behind, but you hugged the body of the woman closer to you, wanted to protect them with your own body no matter the cost.
When you woke up, you were still hugging their body. Despite a few scratches here and there, you saw that they were fine. But you were not, you felt a burning, painful feeling in the back and back of the head, which makes your head felt lighter. Seeing the passed out woman and her son in your hands, you could feel your heart beating calmly, relieving that they are safe.
Because you got up earlier, you instead went to investigate around with your broken back and bleeding head. When you got back, you saw the woman had woken up and she's calming her son down. After she noticed you and realized the situation that happened, she immediately apologized and said that her name was Yaerosa. Later she helped you tending your wounds with things you found useful while sobbing, saying sorry over and over again for causing it but being the person you are, you brushed it off.
When she asked about the people up the tall hills, you got silent. You haven't think that through 'cause of the rushed situation, now you do. But you believe in your comrades, they will understand and led the people back to safety first and then find you later.
Yaerosa was a sweet young woman, you thought, she was a single mother, the son's father had abandoned them upon hearing that she was pregnant, which makes her miserable. However, she got back on her feet by her family's support and the son who was born, whom she loved dearly.
You admired Yaerosa and her bravery personality. She also said that she had a great impression of you, who had started an event of helping those in needs by funding them with money and food and a place of living by building houses with helping them earn a job. She was one of those in needs, and she was grateful for you to be the one who proposed that idea and got accepted.
You and Yaerosa warmed up to each other, spending your time healing and investigating the surroundings to find the way back. She was the perfect woman in your eyes, and when you realized you liked her, you started to try and court her by making her flowers ring, subtly hinting your feelings. And in turns, she also subtly accepted it.
However, the good time never last long.
When you were out hunting for food, Yaerosa got attacked by the remains of the Swarms, eventhough they are much more weaker than all the other one you had encountered, they can still be harmful to those who don't know a single thing about fighting like her. And so, she died with her son in hands.
When you came back, you saw her cold body and felt chills run down your spine. You couldn't believe your eyes, and you were devastated, got crazy and started to hunted down the Swarms. When you calmed down, you instead went back and properly buried Yaerosa and her son, wished for them to rest in peace.
Later on, you found your way back to your kingdom after months of finding, but instead of your comrades and people greeting you, there were only desolation and death surrounded. Red dripping down the walls and mottled under your feet, making you feel more lightheaded than ever. Is this why they take months to find you? That they were all dead? You asked yourself in the reflection of the broken glass underneath you.
Upon seeing the culprit, the Swarms Leader in the middle of the city with it's children around, you could feel blood running straight to your head, and you took it upon yourself to revenge your comrades and kingdom. You wielded your weapon, flying toward the Leader with all your might and started a no-ending fight.
It eventually ended with you winning, but your blood keep flowing non-stop, the big hole on your waist cannot be tend, and your missing right hand cannot be cured. You were on your dying breath, which was your goal at last. You fell down to the ground, your eyes felt heavier than ever and you could slightly see your father, the previous king, and the love of your life, Yaerosa, standing in front of you, with your comrades and people behind them, waving to you.
You thought they were greeting you, welcomed you to their embraces and you were about to ran to them, but instead, you got pushed back, the last thing you saw was them turning around and leaving you in the dark.
When the light hits you, you saw that you are no longer on the battlefield. Your head was hurting, and your memory was not right. You were in a new body now, as you inspect your own body, you were met with a warming person, who later introduced to you as Akivili. They said that they had founded you dying on their way to travel around the galaxy, then they helped you transfer your life and soul into this doll that they got from a friend, giving you a second chance at life.
However, they didn't expect you to forget everything before that, so they didn't know your name. Instead, they gave you a new name, Filtatos, which later you founded out that it means "dearest".
You began your journey with Akivili, traveled around the galaxy and learned new things everytime. But when the times come, you asked them to leave, wanting to travel alone, eventhough you saw that Akivili was hesitant about it, they eventually accepted, and you took on the journey alone.
That's when you found out that without something, your body will always got shrink into a palm size.
Maybe because a certain Aeon keeps hiding the fact that kissing someone on the lips is not something that friends would do, which in turn causing you a lot of troubles because you didn't know how to fix the shrinking, instead you just waited till it gone (that can last at least 12 hours).
Until you met the infamous Dr. Ratio and followed him around that you found out about the method.
But we've discussed it before, so let's keep it aside.
After the Incident of Penacony, in which you cannot dreams so you successfully escape the illusion, you were greeted with the familiar Knight of Beauty, whom you met on your alone journey one time and ended up saved him from the poisonous experiment of some researchers from the Herta's Space Station in a random planet. He was so grateful for that that he always offered to help or even take you with him, eventhough you refused many times before.
Later on with the Galaxy Ranger, Boothill, who immediately recognized you as the loner he met in a bar on another random planet, which you were just following a friend to protect them on a per request. He was mesmerized by your beauty and strength that he wanted to travel with you on the journey for a while longer but never got the chance to since you left the planet as soon as you were done with the request.
A certain Emenator of Nihility is familiar with you, a sense of homesick came to her when meeting you, but she can't quite put on a word to it. So she let it through, bringing her to you even more than a normal person would. Because you brought to her a feeling of protection, wanting to shield you from any harms but didn't dare to stop you when the times come.
That Memo-Keeper sure is a headache. When you first met her, she was trying to sneak into your memories and find out what's behind those doll-like bones of yours, only to be horribly pushed back by the invisible forces. It didn't hurt her, of course, just a little uncomfortable of the suddenness but she could handle it, unlike when she is with that Emenator. But that only makes her longing for it more, wanting to find out what's behind those forces, and so, she continued to invaded your spaces, nothing too much, just close enough to let her through. But everytime she got pushed, she go further as she could, and everytime it happened, her obsession with you grew. So you learned to stay away from her, perhaps someday you will have to make her learn her lessons of not invading others memories.
Next is with the infamous singer, Robin, who was so excited to see you, the person who she once had a chance of meeting in one of her concerts in another planet. You were one of her bodyguards that she hired temporary, and she was delighted by the way you acted around her that she even invited you to sing with her in one of her released albums, which her fans did question who is the deep voices singing in the background of her songs.
Last but not least, the Oak's Head Clan, Sunday, whom you met when he was being imprisoned in a dark room that you unfortunately stumbled across when you were lost. You did offered to help him escape, but he refused. So all you did was cleaning up around him and himself because in your mind, it would suit him better than being stained with dirt and mud. Which in fact, did made him widened his eyes.
Now meeting the Nameless, you were a little surprised at how much it had grown for the past hundreds of years when you had gone, but you reluctantly get used to it. You greeted Pom-pom with ease, who was so happy to see you again, and said hello to the new Nameless, who was so stunned at the fact that you are old enough to had traveled with the Aeon of Trailblaze themselves.
Welt himself, however, was stunned by your appearance and similarities between his old acquaintances. Perhaps could he get your real name perchance? That would help him rings a bell.
But in the meeting with everyone on the Radiant Feldspar, you had to choose a path in which decided where is your next journey will be to continue the recovery of your memories, because all of them had taken a liking to you.
Would it be the old Astral Express but with new passengers? Or the Intelligent Guild of the infamous strict professor? Maybe the IPC with the gambler and his work-friends, who had taken an interest in your past? Or the loner Galaxy Ranger with a gun? Remember the extended hand of a distant Emenator? How about the Knight of Beauty? Can you consider adding a relaxing tour with a certain influencer?
Or maybe should you stay alone and be on own?
Oh wait, you don't have that choice, do you?
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(Art is mine, please be mindful and don't bring it anywhere)
*Likes and reblogs appreciated*
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t0rturedangel · 9 months ago
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if it's not much, some yandere jekyll and/or hyde hc's? can be both sfw and/or nsfw 🤭 anyways take care
╭ . . . 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚘𝚘 𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑 ੭
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𝐃𝐑 𝐉𝐄𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐋 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐌𝐑 𝐇𝐘𝐃𝐄 𝐗 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 ➤ 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘧 𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵𝘴
❏ warnings : love-sick ('yandere') themes, dark themes, a Victorian doctor, mentions of torture, mentions of blood, murder, Hyde.
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I have SOOOO many requests LOL, and i got so much homework- this shit is more important- ILY MY LOVELIES
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✩ ⊱ Jekyll likes to think that he's the gentler, sweeter and more loving version of the two (technically one) men obsessed with you. he's not.
✩ ⊱ He's manipulative, and knows how to get his way with you- you try to leave? Why? do you hate him, do you want to see Hyde take control of him and never let the face of Jekyll be shown to the world ever again? You're the only thing that's keeping him in power.
✩ ⊱ He also, sometimes, has a brutal side to him too- if someone he doesn't approve of gets a bit to close to his lovely dear spouse (Either your parents arranged a marriage with Jekyll, for money obviously, or Jekyll had manipulated you to marry him) well he's just gained a new test subject- how sweet right? right?
✩ ⊱ Don't worry though, he'll save you from watching- he doesn't want to ruin your little head (anymore than he already has.)
✩ ⊱ Jekyll likes to believe that you're a pure little thing, how could you not be? He could only love someone as pure as you- dont even thing about how he's a terrible man- you dont need to at all! Just keep being you're little angelic self
✩ ⊱ unfortunately for you, Jekyll is a Victorian man (a doctor no less) so therefore he has the mentality of one too, i hope you can see what I'm trying to say
✩ ⊱ Jekyll views you as his property is what I'm trying to say, right? I know it sounds horrible and it is, but that's his mentality- I am not going to sugar coat this for you, my lovelies
✩ ⊱ Don't worry though! Jekyll does have his sweet moments, on some occasions he'll let you roam the house! Though the servants will either be busy or away from you, after all who needs to see them, hm? all you need is him!
✩ ⊱ The doctor is deadly scared of loosing you, to either death, or someone else so therefore, he locks you up in a lovely little room he had made and decorated for you- the walls are your favorite colours, he got all the decorations he knew you would love, makes sure the room is constantly clean and you have a lovely large bed the two of you sleep in (whenever Jekyll is not busy, and is not Hyde- though Hyde will also visit you) though you are shackled, again he doesnt want you to leave
✩ ⊱ Hyde, on the other hand, is some how more gentler- though he's a monster, he's artificially made his soul is full of nothing but hate and rage but somehow he never lays a hand on you
✩ ⊱ He, actually doesn't to much to you. Sometimes he'll only sit on a chair in your room and just stare at you- sometimes he smiles at you (or what seems to be a smile) which is either more horrific or sweeter than what Jekyll does.
✩ ⊱ Sometimes Hyde loves to sit next to you, and let you rest against him, he'll also play with your hand or hair, if it's your hand it will be near the shackle so your aching skin could have at least some relief- you're the only person he will ever be gentle with.
✩ ⊱ Whenever he knows Jekyll is not mentally there, he'll let you out of your room and take you outside (in the night of course- there's less people, and much like Jekyll, Hyde hates having people any closer to you than at least a street away) and show you around, sometimes you'll be lucky and he'll take you to his house.
✩ ⊱ Hyde can cook, shocking I know- but he loves to cook for you whenever he can, and hey- it keeps you full and Jekyll never knows.
✩ ⊱ Unlike Jekyll, Hyde (despite loving you so much) does not really care if you saw something horrific, it just means you'll see what he's capable of, how much he's willing to protect you and how much blood he can shed.
✩ ⊱ though don't you EVER think, EVERRRRR that he'll lay a hand on you, he may be evil but he'll never do that, no Jekyll does that (sometimes, after he's sob and beg for your forgiveness)
✩ ⊱ Overall, yeah no, I beg- do not fall for this man (men?) your life will not look so pretty but they'll love you, at least they'll tell you that they do.
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natsunenuko · 2 months ago
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TW // mental issues, mental absue, harassment, surgery/blood
I'm sorry this one is so long, but please carry on reading. It's a chance for me to not only speak about the situation but let out some steam too. It is unfortunate this announcement comes at the same time the flood occurs on the south of my home country (Poland) and I'm in the endangered zone, luckily so far safe, as I feel my head can't handle more stress.
It's been so long since I've been this personal online. I realized how I didn't feel the urge to vent for 3-4 years by now which is a sign of improving mental health. But my healing is still a process, and I'm afraid it's too hard to carry this rock alone at this point. I fought my thoughts if I should do this and I think just as deeply as I write right now. Yet, I know it's better late than never and I thank deeply my friends for helping me out recently as well as in the past in my lowest. I wholeheartedly owe my life to you.
I couldn't ask for better friends. As years verified, even long lasting relationships might be nothing but a mask and I had to learn the hard way. I ended a friendship of 13 years at the time over a misunderstanding. Other person I put my trust on was nothing but a groomer with morally corrupted sexual tendencies who would take advange of a group of minors while being the only adult among them, yet acting like a person much younger than all of them and pressuring all their mental issues on children instead of seeking help. The latter, I might speak of more in detail when I'm ready.
Long time ago I tried calling out for help but back then, the intrusive thoughts won; "Others have it worse, just work harder.", "No one will give you anything for free, no one will care.", "What people will think of you?". and I would only speak about these things in a closed circle of my friends.
I tried my best in silence by not giving up on my creative passion, working restlessly for years, improving. Hoping I could reach the point I can sustain myself purely on what I make.
But the problem is not being self-sufficient. And it's not about my art...
All of my life it has been me, my momma and my granny. The other two important figures weren't there for us, by choice. (which is hard to say if losing someone you loved is worse than not being cared for in the first place) My rather young self at the time didn't put much thought about it as I didn't understand it but something always felt wrong; my only issues at the time was being "that weird, quiet kid with little to no friends". But despite the hardships, my momma has always been my hero, working without a time for a break or rest so we could live happily, to afford something special from time to time.
However in 2014 my momma has been hospitalised and almost lost her life to wrongly treated ovarian cyst (cyst rapture), with enough blood loss to require emergency surgery...
From that point on things went downhill and the result of that we feel to this very day. To stay afloat we fell into a severe dept. (We didn't have any savings, could only rely on borrowing money or loans) And since I was a child as all of this happened, I've only learned about it all throughfully as I entered adulthood, so I wouldn't need to worry about anything and "just be a kid". Which I really understand, but it doesn't make it easier to handle.
And by now, for several years I keep on trying to earn money, so I could free my momma from this chain and let her live, not survive. I always wanted to get through this quietly, because I never, ever wanted to burden anyone with my home problems. But it grew to a point I might need to grab anything to climb towards the light
The goal is $10 000... which is scarily large number.
I list all the options but Kofi is preferred to keep track of the funds!
My commissions are HERE! (the sheet will receive a slight update in upcoming days) My Kofi is HERE! (Level 4 Tea is free headshot drawing every month!) HERE's other services I do (adopts, brushes, etc) I plan to do paid requests for my friday streams on occasion! Anything else I come up with I hope to include in here! Every person who donates will be part of "Thank you" list where I hope to shoutout everybody, cause every penny matters. I want this situation to end...
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ancha-aus · 4 months ago
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RealAgeAU Drabble - Costume
I had a a few ideas for drabbles :3 And I settled on this one for now :3
Mostly because I have one mental image in my head that is just too cute to pass up and I wanted to add more cuteness to this AU so here we GO! @spotaus You ready my friend?
First drabble Prev Drabble Next Drabble
Als I am really considering making a masterpost for these drabbles and any related asks/answers and drawings people make... Just a thought.
*------------------*
Cross watches as Nightmare looks at the different options of costumes. They are in the bigger city nearby to actually give him some options.
It had been thanks to Crop that they even knew about this happening. Kinda like a halloween get together but it mostly celebrates the start of the colder seasons and the time of rest the land needs.
But with everyone in costume because Halloween happens around the same time.
But it gave them the excuse to take Nightmare out on a tiny trip and let him pick out soemthing he would like to wear. Killer says he is making progress on that front but Cross doubts it as Nightmare still just only wears the stuff they picked out for him or Dust's old things.
Even if Nightmare looks adorable in the for him much too big hoody.
Cross smiles down at Nightmare "And? Any ideas for what you want to be dressed as?"
Nightmare shoots him a look and shrugs "Why get dressed? I am a skeleton... That is spooky enough right?"
Cross feels part of his soul melt but tries to keep it in. Nightmare hadn't fully noticed that his way of speaking is starting to slip more and more into more childlike talking and words. Even if he still tries to speak in his fancy way. It is just too cute.
Cross sees it as them doing a good job at this whole parent thing.
Cross grins "True... But Horror already decided to go as a lumberjack and Killer is going as Jason from friday the 13th." Cross himself hadn't decided yet and Cross knows that Dust is planning on just matching whatever Nightmare wants to get dressed as.
Nightmare frowns and stares at all the options. He points towards a costume and Cross checks it.
It is the cheapest thing there is.
Cross saw this coming but he knows how to deal with that! Cross grins "Oh? A little devil? We can do that. Come. We can look at more costumes for that."
Nightmare looks a lot more unsure as he rubs his arm "This is fine... stuff is expensive."
Cross crouches down and leans on his hand "Hey... it is fine... Dust got a budget together and everything. Let me worry about money okay?"
Nightmare frowns but looks considered at some of the more detailed options instead of the cheap stuff. Much better. Nightmare slowly starts to gravitate towards the vampire stuff and Cross starts to think this may be a success when-
a soft sizzle.
Oh are you kidding him!?
"You seriously gonna let him get that stuff?"
Nightmare blinks and grins brightly at the sound of Error and searches for him before spotting him near the ceiling.
Cross glares and hisses "Error." he glances around nervously.
Error snorts "Calm down. I know how to time stuff. People hardly ever notice I am in universes. Seriously though. yOu are going to let him grab this shi-stuff." Error quickly changes his sentence when Cross glares at him.
Cross crosses his arms "Well we want to have stuff to get dressed in for the party. We are trying to fit in."
Nightmare looks up at Cross and smiles a tiny bit "Error can look with us?"
Cross really wants to say no. Not like Killer. Killer hates the fact that Nightmare has a crush on the other. Cross just doesn't want to deal witht he headache that is Error himself.
Now that Cross knows what he knows he realised that Nightmare always had a crush on Error. No one ever noticed because... well... Nightmare went about those feelings as any six year old did. hanging out, trying to invite the other to play with them. bringing small tokens and things. trying to be included.
Error snorts "Nah. Don't want to be stuck in this store of bad quality." and he nudges one of the costumes offered.
Cross sighs annoyed "So why appear?"
Error looks smug "I saw you were going to let Nightmare grab bad quality stuff. of course i step in."
That is another thing Cross doesn't like. Knowing that Error just, glances in whenever he feels like it. Cross glares and hisses "Stop having a window on us open. One it is weird and two if anyone sees it!"
Error waves it off "I just check for a few seconds when i know it is clear. Calm down." he shoots Ngihtmare a look "Seriously though. You are a god. don't gods deserve like the best things?"
Nightmare shrugs and mutters "Jsut got stuff because they wanted it..."
Cross also finds it rich coming from Error as Error still wears some upgraded hobo-jacket that looks like it is barely holding it together.
Error blinks before huffing "Yeah no. I am getting you a costume of actual quality." he looks areound "vampire?"
Nightmare suddenly looks a lot less comfortable with the attention adn returns to Cross's side to hide partly. Nightmare never likes it when others start offering stuff to him. Cross leans downa dn picks up their small charge.
Cross nudges their skulls together and mutters "It is okay. You had an idea of what you like?"
Nightmare just pushes clsoer "it is dumb. easy stuff is fine."
Cross nudges him again "It isn't dumb. What do you want?"
Nightmare remains quiet for a long time and Cross waits patiently. Just let him feel it out first. Let him decide for himself. Error looks a lot less patient as he just stands there, obviously wnating to tap his foot but refrains from it.
Nightmare eventually mutters "liked... vampire becuase it is a bat..."
Cross blinks and grins "You want to be a tiny bat?"
Ngihtmar eshrugs again and tries to hide further. Clearly done with being verbal.
Cross nods and nzuzles the skull "I am sure we can figure out a tiny bat costume." MAybe they can get a cape? get some wings attached? Cross is srue they can figure it out-
Error nods "A bat. That is easy." he looks thoughtful before nodding and with a sizzle he is gone.
Cross sighs loudly but Ngihtmare giggles and gives a happy mutter "He likes me."
Cross sighs loudly "You are very clearly he favourite. Which isn't a good thing bud, you don't want to be a god's favourite." at least that is the lesson Cross got out of stories.
Nightmare hums as he nuzzles his skull against Cross's "You guys were always my favourites..."
Cross hugs Ngihtmare close as he walks towards the exit of the store "You are so sweet. and you always cared so much about us." Ngihtmare mutters about not being sweet but relaxes with the affection.
Cross gets a ride back from Ellie and returns home to the others. He is only done for a few minutes with retelling everything as they make sure Nightmare eats his snack when they hear more sizzling.
A moment later a small package drops on their dining table.
Nightmare blinks nad opens it only to gasp.
Because that is a bright purple hoody with bat wings sewed in the back and a hood with little bat ears and a grumpy bat face on the hood.
It is adorable and Nightmare looks adorable in it and Cross has to admit it was a perfect pic. a very comfortable and cute costume for the coming outing.
Killer grumbles as he stabs his fork into his own food. He glares at his plate "Gonna have to figure out how to scare a god."
Yeah... Cross is hoenstly a little curious as to how Kilelr plans to do that. For now their babybones is happy in his new hoody and they have a very powerful ally who wants Nightmare happy like them.
*------------------*
Was this whole drabble an excuse to get Nightmare a hoody with little bat wings and bat ears? Yes. Yes it was. And he HAS one now!! :D <3
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inevitablysomber-dark · 1 month ago
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Under The Radar 1
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Started a new AU called Affectionate Obsession, with Steve Rogers as the first Character Story Series to be told I hope you all enjoy and don't be afraid to tell me what you think.
Dark! Steve Roger x Kiwi! Reader
Warnings:
This story contains themes of emotional manipulation, power imbalance, dubious consent, toxic relationships, and psychological control. It deals with difficult subjects such as forced dependency and mental/emotional abuse. Reader discretion is advised.
Description: Kiwi thought she had her life under control—until a chance invitation to the Maldives from her former friend pulls her into a web of manipulation and control. What starts as a luxurious vacation turns into a slow descent into captivity as Steve, the wealthy man funding her escape from reality, begins to tighten his grip on her life. Now trapped in a toxic relationship where affection becomes control, Kiwi must navigate a world where every decision is made for her, every boundary crossed, and escape seems impossible.
Is it too late to reclaim her freedom, or will she succumb to the life Steve has crafted for her?
Story Masterlist
The low hum of the factory machinery buzzed in my ears as I sat in the breakroom, staring at the sad sandwich I’d slapped together this morning. How did I end up here? After years of hard work and late-night study sessions, my Finance degree didn’t seem to mean anything anymore. Instead of crunching numbers and living the life I’d dreamed of, I was here—packaging cardboard boxes and watching my future slip away.
I glanced down at my phone, a knot forming in my throat. Rent was coming up in two weeks, and I had no idea how I was going to scrape the money together. The thought of moving back in with my parents twisted my stomach in knots. No way could I go back to their judgmental looks, the snide remarks about my life choices, or their constant need to belittle everything I’ve done. I'd rather sleep on a park bench than deal with that.
My phone buzzed on the table, jolting me from my thoughts. I looked down at the screen and felt my heart sink a little deeper.
Sharon.
Of all the people who could be reaching out, she was the last person I expected—or wanted—to hear from. We hadn’t spoken since graduation, and that was by design. Things between us hadn’t ended well, and the fact that she was contacting me now couldn’t mean anything good.
With a sigh, I swiped to answer. "Hello?"
"Wow, you actually picked up," Sharon's voice dripped with that same smugness that always made me grit my teeth. "I wasn’t sure if you were still alive."
I rolled my eyes, immediately regretting answering. "Yeah, still kicking. How are you?" I shot back, not even trying to hide my sarcasm.
"Fabulous, of course." Her voice was so sugary sweet it made my stomach churn. "Anyway, I’ll get to the point. A few of us are going on a trip—Maldives. One-month private villa. You should come."
I blinked, trying to process what she’d just said. A month-long vacation in the Maldives? Out of nowhere?
"Uh… I don’t think I can," I muttered, the discomfort rising up my spine. "I’m working right now, and I can’t afford a trip like that."
There was a brief silence, followed by Sharon’s familiar, annoyed huff. "Steve’s paying for everything, so don’t worry about that."
As if money was the only issue. I shook my head, feeling my frustration rise. "It’s not just about money. I can’t take off from work for two months."
"Why not?" she snapped, sounding genuinely confused, like the concept of having to work to survive was foreign to her. "Just quit."
I almost laughed at how ridiculous she sounded. "I can’t just quit, Sharon. I need this job. Some of us actually have bills to pay."
"Whatever," she sighed, clearly losing interest. "Look, if you change your mind, you’ve got three months to figure it out. We’re leaving in July."
I clenched my jaw, fighting back a smart remark. "I’ll let you know."
And with that, she hung up.
I stared at the phone, my mind spinning. Why now? Why was Sharon suddenly interested in inviting me on this extravagant trip after all this time? After everything that happened?
Shoving the phone back into my pocket, I shook off the nagging feeling. Whatever she and her clique were up to, I wasn’t about to fall for it. Not this time.
I had more pressing things to worry about—like making it through the rest of my shift without falling apart.
***
Three weeks after Sharon’s call, I found myself standing in the manager’s office, trying to make sense of the words coming out of her mouth.
“Budget cuts,” Diane said flatly, as if that explained everything.
“But I’m the only one being fired,” I pointed out, confusion mixing with anger. “How does that make sense?”
Diane shrugged, clearly uninterested. “It’s just how things are.”
I knew better than to push back too much, but it still gnawed at me. Budget cuts? No way. This factory wasn’t exactly rolling in dough, but I’d seen plenty of new hires lately. So why me?
As I walked out of her office, I thought back to the time I’d corrected Diane on… well, something trivial. She’d been going on about a new process we had to follow, and I’d pointed out a mistake in her instructions. It wasn’t even that big of a deal. I remembered she’d gone all red in the face, tight-lipped, and I could tell she didn’t appreciate being corrected, but it seemed like she was over it.
Did she have something to do with this? It didn’t make sense. I was practically invisible at the factory. Why would she care?
Still, it stung. Whatever the real reason, I was out of a job.
A few weeks later, my luck hadn’t changed. I spent every waking moment job hunting, praying something would come through before the end of the month. But it didn’t.
When it became clear I couldn’t afford my rent anymore, I had to make a decision: drown in debt or swallow my pride and move back in with my parents.
I hated the idea. But bills were piling up, and the pressure was too much, so I chose my parents.
The moment I walked through the door with my boxes, my mom took it upon herself to help me unpack—which, of course, meant a nonstop commentary on all the poor decisions I’d made in life.
“I told you this would happen,” she said, folding one of my shirts with military precision. “You never listen. You should have stayed closer to home, gone into something practical. But no, you wanted to follow your dreams.”
I clenched my jaw, biting back the urge to snap. It was always the same speech: how I should’ve done this, should’ve done that. As if I didn’t feel bad enough already. But I stayed quiet, nodding along while she reminded me just how incapable I was.
I’d been living with my parents for a month and a half now, and I was at my breaking point. Their constant nagging, the tension, the way they hovered over me—it was driving me insane. I needed out.
One week before Sharon and the girls were set to leave for the Maldives, I caved. Desperation took over, and I found myself texting Sharon, asking if there was still space for me on the trip.
Honestly, I didn’t expect her to respond. But then, there it was: a yes. Along with a list of things to pack and an address of where to meet them.
I stared at my phone in disbelief for a second. I was actually going to do this. Anything to get away from my parents.
When I told them about the trip, their reaction was immediate approval. Of course, the second they heard Sharon and Steve would be there, they were practically pushing me out the door.
“Oh, that’s wonderful!” my mom beamed. “Sharon’s such a successful young woman. You should really try to get back on her good side.”
I rolled my eyes. Of course they loved Sharon. She was everything they wanted me to be—successful, put together, and always in the right circles. And Steve? They practically worshiped the guy. The heir to a tech empire. Who wouldn’t?
“Just make sure there’s no more falling outs this time,” my dad added, like I’d ever intentionally ruined things with Sharon.
I remembered the first time I told them about our fallout. They acted like I’d told them I was addicted to drugs, and they never really forgave me for it.
Now, it seemed I was being given a second chance to make everything “right.”
And honestly? I wasn’t sure I wanted to, but at this point, I’d do anything to get away from here.
***
I couldn’t shake the feeling that this whole trip might be some elaborate prank. I half-expected to show up and find a hidden camera crew waiting to embarrass me. But here I was, standing in front of a private jet, struggling with my heavy luggage.
“Need a hand?” a man’s voice cut through my thoughts. Before I could even respond, he was already taking my bags, prying them from my grip with an ease that felt almost dismissive.
"Uh, thanks," I muttered, watching him haul the luggage up the steps of the jet. Was this even real?
Inside, Sharon was waiting, her bright smile as fake as I remembered. “Kiwi! Oh my God, look at you!” Her eyes swept over me, lingering on all the wrong places. “Still… you,” she added, her tone too sharp to be anything close to nice.
“Yeah,” I replied, biting back the instinct to roll my eyes. Same old Sharon. Still poking at me for being shorter and curvier than the rest of them. “Still me.”
I looked to Natasha, Jane and Pepper and waved before following them into the Private Jet.
Sharon smirked, gesturing toward the jet's sleek interior. “Welcome aboard. I bet it’s been a while since you’ve ridden in anything like this?”
I didn’t bother with a response. There were a million reasons why I didn’t fly on private jets, one being that I couldn’t afford too, but it wasn’t worth the energy. I followed Sharon inside, catching sight of the group lounging around like they belonged there.
Steve was the first to greet me, his golden hair practically glowing in the soft light as he flashed that easy smile. “Hey, Kiwi,” he said, patting the seat beside him. His tone was friendly—maybe a little too friendly—but I hesitated. Before I could move, Natasha grabbed my arm and steered me toward a different seat.
“We saved you a spot over here!” Natasha chimed, squeezing my arm with just a bit too much excitement. She shot a quick glance at Steve, then back at me, like there was something I wasn’t picking up on.
Peter was already seated across from me, leaning back with a casual confidence that made me uncomfortable. His dark eyes met mine for a split second, and he gave a small nod. There was nothing awkward or out of place about him—if anything, he looked like he belonged here. Like this was exactly where he wanted to be.
“Glad you could make it,” Peter said, his voice smooth and low. There was something about the way he said it, something that felt off, but I couldn’t put my finger on it.
The conversations around me were light, but every now and then, I’d catch something—a quick glance between Steve and Peter, a soft chuckle from one of the boys, or Sharon’s eyes sparkling with something that wasn’t amusement. It felt like they were all in on something, like the air was thick with an inside joke I wasn’t a part of.
I tried to brush it off, joining in on the small talk and ignoring the strange tension. But with every shared look between the boys, every lingering gaze from Sharon, that unease just kept creeping back.
It was like they were waiting for something.
Something I wasn’t in on.
***
I stirred awake to the gentle shake of my shoulder and a soft voice calling my name. “Hey, Kiwi, we’ve landed,” Natasha said, with a small grin, wiping her own hands on her lap. “You’ve got a little drool there.”
Still groggy, I wiped at the side of my mouth, feeling my face flush as I tried to erase the evidence of my nap. I sat up, blinking a few times, trying to get my bearings. When I looked around, I noticed the plane was emptier than before.
“Where is everyone?” I asked, my voice still thick with sleep.
Natasha stretched, her arms raising above her head. “They already headed to the villa. I guess they didn’t want to disturb you.”
I glanced over at Peter, still slouched in his seat, eyes closed, completely knocked out. The soft rise and fall of his chest made him look so peaceful, like the weight of the world wasn’t even a concern. He hadn’t noticed anything either.
Natasha smirked, shrugging. “I felt bad leaving you two alone, so I stayed back.”
I looked between Natasha and Peter, my stomach twisting. “Oh… right,” I muttered, feeling a familiar awkwardness settle over me. My head dropped slightly. It wasn’t the first time I felt like an outsider with these people, but moments like this seemed to make it worse.
Natasha didn’t say anything, but she gave me a look, one that spoke volumes without needing words. Then she moved toward Peter, giving him a nudge. He jolted awake, eyes wide as if he had no idea where he was. “Where is everyone?” he asked, his voice a little too casual.
Natasha repeated the same thing she told me, though this time, there was a teasing edge to her tone. “They left for the villa, but I didn’t want to leave you two sleeping on the plane.”
Peter ran a hand through his messy hair, giving a lazy stretch before standing up. I wondered if I was overthinking things, but Natasha’s earlier look stayed in the back of my mind.
“Alright, let’s catch up,” Peter said, flashing that easygoing smile of his.
As soon as I stepped off the plane, the warm, salty air hit me, carrying the scent of the ocean and sun. Waiting outside was a sleek black car, ready to take us to the villa. Peter led the way, while Natasha shot me an encouraging smile, like she knew exactly what I was thinking but wouldn’t say it out loud.
But once we got in the car, the excitement that had been bubbling inside me during the plane ride started to fizzle. Reality was sinking in, fast. I stared out the window as the scenery blurred by, and that familiar, sinking feeling crept in.
What am I even doing here?
Every part of me was screaming that this was a mistake. I didn’t belong here. These people had made me feel out of place back then—why would now be any different? I had spent so much time trying to distance myself from them, so why was I here now, in the same circle that made me feel like I wasn’t enough?
Was it going to be like this the entire trip? A constant feeling of not fitting in? The idea of spending two months like this, constantly questioning why I came, made my chest tighten.
I imagined stopping the car right there, getting out, and figuring out a way to go home. But how? I came here with them, and I was stuck until they decided to leave. There wasn’t exactly an easy way out.
I sighed, feeling a knot form in my throat as the tears threatened to well up. But I fought them back, forcing myself to take a deep breath. ‘Hold it together,’ I told myself. There was no way I was going to fall apart in front of Peter, Natasha, or anyone else.
I stared out at the horizon, the villa still nowhere in sight, trying to clear the anxious storm swirling inside me. I would just have to figure this out somehow. I always did.
***
When Natasha, Peter, and I finally arrived at the villa, the others had already claimed their rooms. The place was breathtaking—open spaces, stunning ocean views, and a luxurious atmosphere that screamed money. I was almost tempted to be impressed until Sharon appeared, smug as ever, pointing to the far side of the villa.
"Natasha, Peter, your rooms are down the hall," she said with a wave of her hand before turning to me. Without a word or explanation, she just motioned to the other side of the villa, not even bothering to look me in the eye.
I stood there for a second, waiting for...something. Maybe an explanation, a reason for the sudden isolation, but nothing. No one said anything. Natasha gave me a quick, apologetic glance, but even she stayed quiet.
“Guess I'm on my own then.”
I walked in the direction Sharon had pointed, my suitcase bumping against my heels as I made my way down the corridor. The villa was massive, sprawling in all directions, but as I got closer to my room, I noticed how much plainer and utilitarian the space became. The opulence of the rest of the villa seemed to vanish the farther I went.
And then I found it—a small, one-off room that looked like it had been tacked on as an afterthought. My stomach twisted as I stepped inside. It didn’t have the same elegance as the other rooms I’d seen. The furniture was basic, the decor minimal, and there was no sign of the luxury that was displayed on the other side of the villa.
It looked like a remodeled servant’s quarter. I knew the vibe all too well. Being around people like Sharon, I had seen enough servant quarters to know what one looked like, no matter how much they tried to pretty it up.
I stood there for a moment, soaking it all in. There had to be at least one or two other rooms left over in this massive villa, but I wasn’t given one of those. No, this room was chosen specifically for me. The message was loud and clear: *Know your place. *
I set my suitcase down with a sigh, biting back the frustration swelling in my chest. I should have expected this. I knew what I was getting into when I accepted the invite.
I sat on the edge of the bed, staring at my half-unpacked suitcase, trying to figure out a game plan for the next two months. The thought of spending all that time with these people—people who barely knew me, or worse, remembered me only for what I wasn’t—made my stomach twist. I didn’t want to be ignored the entire trip, but becoming a complete recluse would probably just make things worse. What if they just... left me behind?
The more I thought about it, the more frustrated I got. The walls seemed to inch closer, squeezing the air out of the room. My anxiety gnawed at me from the inside. Was this really worth getting away from my parents?
Before I could spiral any further, a light knock on the doorframe jolted me from my thoughts. I turned to see Natasha standing there with a soft smile and a casual “Hey.”
I forced a smile in return. "Hey," I said, trying to sound less flustered than I felt.
Natasha stepped inside, looking around the room before glancing back at me. “Nice room,” she commented.
I glanced at her, trying to figure out if she was joking. Was she being serious? Because this room—my room—was anything but nice. It was clearly the smallest, most tucked-away space in the entire villa. My little corner of the world, far from everyone else.
“Yeah,” I muttered, not sure what else to say.
“They’re about to get ready for lunch in like two minutes,” Natasha added, a little too breezily, as if she hadn’t noticed how awkward this all felt.
"Okay," I said, figuring that was her cue to leave. But instead of leaving, she sat down on the edge of the bed, her gaze still fixed on me, like she was waiting for something.
I shifted uncomfortably, unsure of what to do next. “Was there… something else?” I asked, hesitantly, trying to figure out what this impromptu visit was really about.
Natasha took a deep breath, still staring me down before stating “Sharon invited you to keep Peter busy.”
  I froze for a moment, blinking in disbelief as Natasha’s words settled in. "Wait… what do you mean I was invited to keep Peter busy?"
Natasha’s shifted uncomfortably, avoiding my gaze for a moment before facing me again "Look, it wasn’t meant to be a big deal. Sharon didn’t want things to be awkward, you know? If you didn’t come, there would've been an odd number, and Steve didn’t want to leave Peter behind."
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “So, I was invited to… what? Be Peter’s distraction?”
She shrugged, looking almost apologetic. "Well, it’s not like it’s a bad thing. You two are both nice people, right? It’s not like it was meant to offend you or anything"
I stared at her, still trying to process this. Peter? Then it hit me.
"What about Clementine?" I asked, my curiosity spiking. Last I heard, she and Peter were still together. Sure, she hadn’t been on the plane, but I figured maybe she was meeting up with us later. They were inseparable, after all.
Natasha shrugged again, but there was something uneasy in her eyes this time. "I don’t know. Sharon thinks they broke up, but…"
"But?" I pressed, sensing there was more to it.
She sighed, glancing away. "Clementine kind of just… disappeared. She stopped coming around, and Peter stopped talking about her. It’s weird, though. I don’t think anyone really knows what happened."
The room suddenly felt colder, and the walls seemed to close in again. Clementine disappeared? And now I was supposed to… what? Be Peter's distraction? None of this made sense, and yet, it felt like I was being pulled into something I wasn’t ready for.
I stared at Natasha, my mind spinning as she casually shrugged off the fact that Clementine had just disappeared. Clementine wasn’t the kind of girl to just vanish without a trace. She was... put together. Confident, smart, driven. The kind of girl who had her entire life mapped out from the moment she could walk.
Clementine had been a scholarship kid, just like me, but that’s where our similarities ended. She had that type of grace and poise that people like me only dreamed of. I remember seeing her around campus, always looking so polished, so in control, even though she came from a background as modest as mine. She had Peter wrapped around her finger—he adored her. At least, that’s what I’d always thought. They were practically inseparable.
The last time I heard anything about her, she was starting some fancy job after graduation, and Peter was supposedly gearing up to propose. That’s what people like Clementine did. She climbed the ladder, no matter where she came from, and she always seemed to have everything fall perfectly into place.
I couldn't wrap my head around this. How did she go from being Peter’s "forever" to just... disappearing? And now *I* was here? Supposed to "keep Peter busy" like some sort of replacement? None of this was making any sense.
Natasha’s voice brought me back to the moment. "Yeah, it was weird, right?" she continued, leaning back casually. "Peter just stopped mentioning her, like she never existed. He’s been pretty chill about the whole thing. But Sharon thinks they broke up, and... I don’t know, maybe she’s right. Maybe that’s why you’re here."
I shook my head, trying to process. "Clementine wouldn’t just disappear. She wasn’t like that. She had a plan, she was going to—"
Natasha cut me off. "Well, plans change, right? Maybe she wasn’t as perfect as you think. People always hide stuff. Maybe Peter saw something in her that no one else did."
The idea didn’t sit right with me. Clementine always seemed untouchable, like she had everything figured out. Now, she was just… gone. And here I was, caught in some ridiculous plan to "keep Peter busy."
I started gearing up to confront Sharon, but Natasha quickly stepped in front of me, stopping me before I could make it to the door.
"Where do you think you're going?" she asked, her voice edged with concern.
"I just want to have a little chat with Sharon," I replied, trying to sidestep her. But Natasha moved again, blocking me. She lowered her voice, clearly not wanting to make a scene.
"You're being ridiculous. Just calm down and think about this." Her eyes darted around nervously. "This is supposed to be a vacation. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. You could still enjoy yourself, Kiwi."
I paused and turned to face her, frustration bubbling up. "That was always the plan, but why did you have to tell me about Sharon’s little setup with Peter?" I tried to keep my voice steady, but it was sharp.
"I was just giving you a heads up," Natasha said softly, her eyes pleading.
I sighed, feeling the weight of everything pressing down on me. But I couldn’t just let it go. Without saying another word, I turned and marched toward Sharon and Steve’s room, Natasha trailing behind me, still begging me to think it through.
When I reached the door, I didn’t hesitate—I slammed it open. There, on top of Steve, was Sharon, practically tangled up with him. She scrambled off him the second she saw me, her face flushed. Steve, on the other hand, just stayed where he was, smirking like the whole thing was a joke to him.
"What the hell is your problem?" Sharon snapped, straightening out her clothes.
I didn’t flinch. "I want to go home."
I thought about calling her out right then and there, exposing the whole plan about setting me up with Peter. But I couldn’t do that—not without throwing Natasha under the bus. As much as I was irritated with her, I wasn’t ready to burn that bridge. So I kept it simple.
"This whole trip has been uncomfortable for me since I got on the plane. If it’s going to be like this for a whole months I don’t want to stay."
Sharon's expression shifted, her irritation melting into a smirk. "Sure, whatever."
Just as I was about to turn and leave, Steve’s deep voice cut through the air. "No."
I froze, watching as Steve got up from the bed, his frame towering over me. It was then that I realized how much bigger he was compared to me. He took a step closer, his eyes locked on mine.
"Why not?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
Steve gave me a cold, calculated smile. "The itinerary is already set, Kiwi. We can’t just change everything around because one person is feeling a little uncomfortable."
I swallowed hard, trying to keep my voice steady. "I’ll pay you back," I offered, even though I knew it was a desperate move.
Steve laughed, a low, mocking sound. "You have over a hundred grand to pay back?"
My stomach dropped as he kept going. "I heard you were working at some factory for, what, twenty bucks an hour? I’m guessing since you suddenly had time for this trip, you lost that gig, huh?"
I could feel my face flushing as I tried to think of a way out. "I don’t need a private jet home," I said quietly. "Just a ride and an economy seat. I’ll figure it out."
Steve shook his head, stepping even closer. "You still owe me for your part of the trip," he said, his voice cold and final.
The reality of the situation hit me like a punch to the gut. I was trapped, and Steve was making damn sure I knew it.
Steve’s eyes softened as he stood in front of me, his posture relaxed, like he was trying to show he wasn’t a threat. He moved to block my way, but not in an intimidating way—it felt more like he was trying to keep me from making a mistake.
“You’re upset,” he said, his voice gentler now, almost coaxing. “I get it, Kiwi, I really do. But leaving right now? That’s not what you really want.”
I frowned, crossing my arms, my defenses already up. “I’m uncomfortable, Steve. Why would I stay?”
He sighed softly, brushing a hand through his tousled blonde hair. “Look, I get that things have been a little weird, but think about it. Going back home, what’s waiting for you there? Things weren’t exactly great, were they?”
I blinked, surprised by his words. It was vague, but it still struck a nerve. My chest tightened at the reminder of how suffocating life at home had been.
Steve stepped closer, but there was no malice in his movements. If anything, his presence felt like it was wrapping around me, enveloping me in something familiar yet foreign.
“Why rush back to all that?” he asked, his voice low, almost tender. “You’ve got a chance here to take a break, to really breathe.”
I swallowed hard, trying to maintain my composure. He wasn’t exactly wrong. I hadn’t been thrilled about the idea of going back to my parents’ house—being treated like I’d failed, like I was just in the way.
“That’s not the point,” I muttered, my voice not as strong as I wanted it to be. “I didn’t come here to feel like an outsider.”
Steve’s expression shifted, softening even more. He moved closer, but not threateningly—just enough to let me know he was serious. “You don’t have to. No one here is against you, Kiwi. You’ve got space here to be free, to enjoy yourself. You’re not stuck.”
His words, smooth and almost too perfect, started to chip away at my defenses. He wasn’t wrong. There was a kind of freedom here that I didn’t have back home. No hovering parents, no endless job hunt. Just sun, sand, and a chance to let go of the chaos.
“I just want you to give it a shot,” Steve continued, his voice barely above a whisper. “If, after a week, you still feel like this… I’ll make sure you get home. Personally. But for now, just relax. Let yourself enjoy it.”
I hesitated, my mind a tug-of-war between the stress and frustration that had been building and the calm that Steve was offering. He seemed so reasonable, so understanding. Was I just being paranoid? Maybe I needed to take a step back and see if things improved.
“Alright,” I said finally, my voice soft. “I’ll stay. But just for a week.”
A slow smile spread across Steve’s face, his satisfaction clear, though he tried to hide it behind his cool demeanor. “Good. I knew you’d see things my way.”
He stepped back, giving me space, and for a moment, I felt the weight lift just a little. Natasha, who had been quietly watching, caught my eye, but her expression was hard to read. Maybe I wasn’t seeing the full picture. Or maybe I was just overthinking everything.
Am I making the right call? ***
Steve moved me out of the servant’s quarters and into a small, luxury room. It wasn’t anywhere near the others, but it was closer to the pool in the back, so I figured I could make do. At least it didn’t feel like a forgotten corner of the house.
As I unpacked, Natasha stayed with me, folding clothes and organizing things like she was trying to smooth over the mess from earlier.
“I’m sorry,” she said suddenly, breaking the quiet. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye, not entirely sure if I believed her or if she was just trying to stay on good terms. The side-eye I gave her must’ve said enough because she added, “Seriously, Kiwi. I didn’t think it would be such a big deal.”
I sighed, my shoulders relaxing a little. “It’s fine,” I muttered. "Just... don’t spring shit like that on me again."
Natasha nodded, her expression softening. “I promise. I just want you to enjoy the trip. We all do.”
Enjoy the trip. Right. That’s what I kept telling myself. I needed to enjoy myself, no matter what. To hell with everyone else. To hell with Sharon’s power plays and the thinly veiled insults. To hell with my parents, and their endless nagging about how I should’ve been more like Sharon. To hell with all of it.
I glanced around my new room, taking in the sleek design, the comfortable bed, and the view of the pool. This wasn’t so bad. Maybe I could actually breathe for a while. Just focus on enjoying the sun, the beach, the space.
Yeah. Fuck everyone. I was going to make this trip mine.
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