#but it's 3:45am as I'm typing this

[violet-traitor]

I've been meaning to draw them for quite some time now....

[youremyonlyhope]

I'm not a "new musical theatre style music" person. Never have been.

Even when I was doing voice lessons, I'd steer towards the golden age or jazzy musical theatre songs. My voice teacher would have to drag me kicking and screaming towards adding anything new musical theatre to my repertoire. For a while, the most modern song in my book was I Know The Truth from Aida, and I wouldn't count that as new musical theatre style since I mean more the Pasek&Paul or Joe Iconis type.

And now I have an audition coming up for a small production of a show in that style and I'm supposed to sing a song in a similar style. And I'm looking at all my sheet music like... let me do some Cole Porter... or Gershwin... at least Sondheim please...

[cry4mina]

Heaven

(Nayeon x Fem!reader)

Word Count: 6.9k

Fluff/Smut

Summary: After being with Nayeon for a while, it's clear that she is your future. You both decide it's time to move in with each other, this fic takes place on move in day!

TW: Fluffy, cute, oral, fingering, a little nipple play, strap ons, teasing, lots of almost moments. Let me know if I missed anything.

A/N: @dovveri (the precious angel) had asked me to expand on this MONTHS ago and I took my sweet ass time (I stalled bc fluff is not my strong suit.) BUT it here now and I hope you enjoy it!<3

Also! Happy 6 Months to Cry4Mina! I know I say I'm grateful for all of you all the time but hitting 600 followers AND it being my 6 months of writing has really just been amazing.

Thank you all for taking the time to read my works, the support you've given me and all the love! I'm really looking forward to writing a lot of the drafts that I have, and interacting with everyone! I hope you all have such a lovely day/night and get you a little sweet treat! <3

The walls are blank. Every place where art once hung, now patched with tack and smoothed over. Boxes lining the small living room and parts of the kitchen…reliving some of the sacred memories built here when your phone chimes, interrupting the sweet thoughts. You to pull it out of your pocket to check the notification.

Nay: I’m outside baby (9:45am)

Not even bothering to reply, you just pull the door open to see a U-haul truck backed into the parking spot closest to your soon to be old front door and Nayeon no where in sight.

Looking around in confusion, you hear the clattering of the big metal rolling door on the back of the truck.

Eyes meeting the sound as it rattles, ascending upwards and stopping in place. A petite Nayeon lifting it and climbing into the back to push it all the way to the top, revealing the empty truck she rented just for the things you decided to bring along with you.

She leaves you completely breathless, per usual…but today, being the day you were moving in together, your heart throbbed with love and affection for your beautiful girlfriend.

White sneakers with long white socks up to her knees, black shorts that were intentionally too short, a top that had hints of purple and a trucker hat to finish the look off. Appearing as if she just got out of a photoshoot or filming a video or something more extravagant than helping you move.

Your jaw hit the floor as she half jogged up to you, and jumping into your arms and wrapping her legs around you, expecting you to hold her up while her forearms found their place on your shoulders and her hands were interwoven with themselves.

Being sure to catch her, providing some support from under her, she lean back and grabbed your cheeks, kissing them one, two, three times before completely beaming at you from the few inches she had of height on you in this position.

“Hi, baby!,the ” another kiss, this one on the lips, to taper off her sentence while her hands found their way around your neck once more.

“Hi, my love, you look amazing.” absorbing her like flowers take in the sun, feeling her skin on yours was magic.

“Only for you.” watching as her eyes convert to a half lidded seduction, her tone emanated a specific type of want that could only be translated privately, very very privately.

Nayeon reverts the seductive face, unwrapping her legs and stand on her own, keeping her hands connected around your neck and pulling you into an even bigger hug, fingers tapping on your shoulder blades to the song she was humming, before shimmying in your arms.

Both of you start giggling before she finally lets go of you, very obviously excited about this adventure you were going on together. Her hand finds yours, lightly gripping it and swinging it around while she talks.

“Okay, so the movers should be here any minute - we are loading what you’re keeping into this truck” pointing to the one that she pulled up in.

“And anything we are going to donate will go in the movers truck, they will drop it off and then we will go…home, the movers will meet us there and we will get everything organize. Sound like a plan?” the loving look she gives you when she says home made your knees weak, jelly filled joints fighting to hold the weight of the love you held for her every thing she did, but especially when she said something sweet or looked at you a certain way.

“Sounds good, babe.” uttered over the squeaking of the brakes from the truck of movers that just pulled up and her squealing at the sight of them.

The 3 men come over, asking you for detailed instructions on what to keep and what to put in the “donation” truck. Most of the things you were keeping was in boxes but you were keeping your king sized bed, Nayeon was too in love with it to even think about getting a new one.

“But it’s already broken in on my side, I don’t want to do that again. Don’t you like sleeping on a cloud? I can’t believe you’re considering a new one…” argued a few weeks ago when you half way discussed what furniture you wanted to keep.

Both of you decided the living room would be the focus first, you’d want a new couch if anything. Wanting to pick out the decorations together for each room would be a fun bonding experience and that was something you were very much looking forward to.

“Alright, we will get started.” One of the men said, walking into the living room and starting with the couch you weren’t going to keep, taking it to the donation truck while you and Nayeon focused on the boxes.

Slowly removing everything from the apartment until it was completely empty, you couldn’t help but have a little moment of sadness, not that you were upset about this new chapter in your life with Nayeon, but more so the memories of this apartment and what it meant to you.

Nayeon sees you staring at the bare walls and taking the last walk through of the place to make sure everything was taken care of. Waiting for you to have your moment, she doesn’t rush you, simply leaning on the door frame with her arms crossed, silently watching the emotions change across your face.

It’s an emotional transition, even if it’s a good one. This place was where you built your relationship, the foundation of the steady and healthy bond you and her shared. Moving in together was a massive step that you were more than ready to take, but you couldn’t help allow the nostalgia consume you for a moment as a few tears roll down your cheek.

Feeling her eyes on your back, the edges of your mouth turn up knowing the exact look she’s giving you before you even see it.

“I can feel you watching me” giggling through the droplets that threatened to drip down your chin, you try to wipe them before she can see.

“Don’t try to hide it, I know you’re crying!” she walks up behind you, giving you a hug from behind and resting her head on your shoulder blades.

Sniffling while trying to gain your composure again, Nayeon just holds you until your breath smooths out more. Rocking you from side to side in attempts to comfort you.

“Don’t worry, baby” spinning you around carefully so you can face her; she likes to make eye contact when she speaks.

“This is going to be great! And do you want to know the best part?” leaning into you, putting her weight on you to make you hold her back.

“What’s the best part, my love?”

“We get to do it together!” Nayeon practically tackles you to the ground, smooching you all over the face and tickling you in the process.

Rolling around and trying to avoid her hands as you both laugh, you love how playful your relationship with her is. She always knew how to make you smile, in every single way you could imagine.

Once she put a halt to the tickle fest she brought on, she was straddling you on the floor, hands resting on your stomach and your hands were on her thighs. You sit up, placing your hands on her ass and scoot her into you.

Faces so close you can feel her breath on your lips, you can tell she’s riled up from the way you’re looking at her and your hand placement, it was easier to get her worked up - easier than she would like to admit.

Reaching your hands up from your girlfriend’s thighs and trailing them up her chest, watching as her breath hitches when you pass her collarbones.

Gliding your digits up her neck and to her cheeks, you feel her flush - a noticeable wave of heat rushing through her.

Sight going from her lips, up to her eyes, and then back down to her lips again, you bring her mere centimeters from your mouth.

Her breathing speeds up.

Feeling her heart race through your fingertips, the way her eyes were locked in on you, and the way she held you close without an inch of wiggle room…you knew exactly what she was thinking about…and what she wanted.

“Baby” breathed to her, teasing her with your whispers and the distance between your lips.

Nayeon’s is completely enthralled, looking like she wants to beg for you to touch her. Eyes returning to their half lidded state from earlier, she starts rocking her hips on your lap, you stop her immediately.

“Not yet, baby. We still have work to do…and I want pizza for dinner.” kissing her forehead before standing with her still attached to you.

“You’re like a koala, you know that?” chuckling at her for not letting go of you, bringing her outside with you and locking the door.

She whines really loudly, “Fuck you, ugh”

“Whyyyyyyy? What did I do?!” gasped back in fake shock, you knew exactly why she was saying it. She rests her head on your shoulder.

“Because, you did that on purpose!” Pouting at the state she’s in.

“Did what on purpose, honey?” kissing her cheeks while walking her to your car that she was planning on drive to the new place.

Nayeon gets down off you and sticks her hands out for your keys with a fake attitude, you dangle them in front of her. She attempts to snatch them, but you’re too quick and she misses.

“Did what on purpose?” poking her chest lightly just to get a little rise out of her.

She leans into your ear closely, playing with the collar of your shirt before she speaks soft sultry words right into you.

“For making me wet and making me wait to feel you.”

Jaw dropping for a second time tonight, she kisses your check tenderly. Winking at you while she bites her lip. She takes the keys out of your hand and replaces them with the U-Haul keys.

“Last one home buys dinner!” rapidly getting into the car and backing out of the driveway.

Still standing in the same spot, unable to stop yourself from smiling at how goofy she is. Shaking your head while giggling, it’s impossible not to fall deeper in love with her by the day.

Turning around one last time, admiring what was home in the afternoon light before getting into the truck and going to what was your next chapter of life.

—

The drive wasn’t too long, maybe 30 minutes at most. Driving in silence, you’re excited to get settled in your new place. Living in the memory of when you and Nayeon toured the apartment you’d be moving into.

Hardwood floors, vaulted ceilings, massive windows that were floor to ceiling, and the lighting fixture in the dinning area that Nayeon fell in love with.

Remembering the way she exclaimed “baby, look at this!” At every turn, around every corner, you both knew this was the place you were going to start the adventure of living together.

The island in the kitchen was what you were particularly excited about, having more room to cook for her when you had a moment. She didn’t know that was the intention, but being able to surprise her with it some night would be great.

Turning the corner to the complex, you already see your car in the assigned spot. Nayeon is leaning on the drivers side door, scrolling through her phone when you back the truck in next to her.

“Ha! Dinner is on you tonight!” Happily skipping over to the drivers side door as you hop out of the truck.

“Yeah, yeah!” waving your hand and rolling your eyes before smirking at her.

“Pepperoni and extra cheese, please!”

“Alright, alright. Let’s go check out the place!” putting your hand out in front of her with puckered lips, waiting for your keys and a kiss, she’s happy to give both.

—

As you reach the elevator, you notice the weight of your keys is different. Looking down while stepping into the metal box what was going to get you to the floor you apartment was on - you notice a light blue key with an N and a heart on it.

Toying with the key in your hand, you look up at her to see she’s distracted and doesn’t know that you’ve noticed the cute little surprise she’s placed on your key ring while she was waiting for you to arrive.

“Baby” called to her softly from a foot away.

Nayeon looks over at you, eyes looking directly into yours and then down at the keys in your hands, showing her the one she placed on your keyring.

She smiles, pulling her keys off her belt loop, flashing you a key with your initial and a heart next to it, in your favorite color.

“I thought it would be a nice cute little surprise for our move in day.” intertwining her pinky with yours.

“Thank you, it’s so cute and thoughtful.”

The elevator dings, sliding the doors open and allowing you and your girlfriend to step into the hallway.

Taking the corridor to the right, Nayeon basically pulling you to the door of your new home. The door was black with shiny brass numbers reflecting back to you.

She slips her key into the door, the heavy lock turns and clicks into place. Nayeon looks over at you and smiles before pushing the door open and squealing in excitement, jumping in place. Gosh, she’s so cute.

Grabbing her hand before she can run inside, you pull her close to you, pressing your body against hers. She’s going to take this as you teasing her, but really you just had something you wanted to do.

“Wait a sec, I think we should be a little traditional about this.”

“Traditional?” Scoffed at you while her hands are wrapped around your waist.

“Yeah, traditional…” placing your hand behind her legs and scooping her up into your arms, bridal style, before she can protest.

Nayeon squeals at being lifted up but her arms instinctively wrap around your neck. When she realizes what you’re doing she starts giggling at the sweetness of the moment.

Unable to take her eyes off you as you take your step over the threshold into your new home. One of her rather large hands descends to your chest, placing it flat under your collar bone.

“Home.” said lightly under your breath but loud enough for her to hear you, panning the emptiness of the apartment you were about to fill with not only your physical things, but the love you had for each other.

Removing her hand off your chest, she uses her fingers to turn your head towards her and kisses you softly.

“Home.” Pointing one of her fingers into your chest, bring her lips back to yours.

Resting your foreheads together, you lower her legs to signal her to stand on her own. She whines in protest, leaning against you as she fights against regaining her balance.

“Are you ready?” Grabbing her hand, looking her in the eyes and smiling.

“Never been more ready, actually.” Kissing the top of your hand, grabbing her phone and checking her messages to see the other team of movers was outside and ready to move the furniture into your new space.

“They’re here!” Gleefully jumping in place again before heading for the door.

“Let’s go!” Following closely behind her and slapping her ass playfully.

Nayeon lets out a soft moan. Whipping around to look at you to see if you’ve heard, covering her mouth with her hand trying to hide her own shock and the flushing in her cheeks.

Eye widen as before you let out a thunderous laugh.

“Don’t worry, baby. We can take care of that later.” Kissing her forehead and leading her down to the elevator by her hand, with her trying to cover the flushed cheeks she now wears in embarrassment.

—

“Hmm…maybe a little more to the left? This doesn’t feel centered to me.” Nayeon is pensive, finger on her cheek as she asks the movers, yet again, to move the bed over so it’s perfectly centered in your new bedroom.

“Babe, it looks fine where it is!” Chiming in from the closet where you were hanging all of the clothes you had smartly packed on hangers so they’d be easier to deal with.

Organizing the closet so the left side was hers and the right side was yours, you could hear her sigh from the other room.

Picturing her exact movements in your minds eye, you knew she was shifting her weight from one leg to another, biting her pointer finger with her other arm crossed over her chest.

“Okay…I hear you…but what if we scooted it over just a little bit to the ri-“ sneaking up behind her and silencing her with a soft bite to the neck causing her to stifle a whine.

“I think it’s perfect where it is, Nayeon.” kissing her cheek before you turn your attention to the movers.

“Thank you so much for your help today!” shaking their hands as they leave the room and walk out the front door.

“Baby, I really don’t know if I like the bed in this position or not.” Nayeon’s hands are on her hips again, trying to figure out if it would look better centered on the other wall.

“Honey…we can rearrange any time we want. No worries, let’s just get the rest of the house together, okay?” you throw the sheets at her for her to make the bed she was scowling at and head back to continue what you’ve been doing in the closet.

Nayeon followed you into the closet, sheets in hand, with a pout that would make anyone drop what they’re doing to please her.

“What’s wrong, my love?” Pausing the organizing of your clothes as you spoke to her.

“I’m hungry and the bed is crooked.” she sighs and give a playful little stomp, throwing the cutest tantrum you’ve ever seen.

“I’ll order the pizza now then, okay?” pulling your phone out to send through the order you already prepared for the two of you.

“But what about the bed?”

“We can fix it later, okay? Just put the sheets on it and we will worry about it after dinner.”

Nayeon rolls her eyes and heads out of the closet to complete the task at hand.

After about 5 minutes goes by, a frustrated grumble echoes through the room, followed by shouting and sighing.

“Ugh! This bed is crooked! It’s not freaking centered!” Nayeon huffs as she finishes putting the sheets on, trying to scoot the heavy bed and frame over an inch or two to make it “centered”.

She’s so dramatic.

You adore this part of her.

“Let me see.” Finishing up the last of the closet and stepping out to see what she how “crooked” it was.

The bed was straight against the wall…there’s no way it could’ve actually been crooked. Giving her a side eyed glare, you lightly push her shoulder.

“It’s perfectly straight, what do you mean?” Chuckling at her while you put your hands up in confusion.

“No, it’s not! Look!”

Nayeon squats down in front of the bed, point and explaining how it’s not lined up with the floor boards and all you can do is admire how passionately she’s making her case about something so silly.

Just smiling, you walk up to her as she continues on her rant about the bed.

“So you see, that’s why it’s not straight because this is…not…” tilting her head up, eyes lacing every part of you as you step up to her and place a finger under her chin.

“I think it looks good, don’t you?” leading her to stand, her eyes still not leaving you.

Nayeon stutters through her mentions of now suddenly agreeing with you.

“O-oh, uhm…y-yes, I don’t t-think we should move it at all.”

She’s so cute.

Hooking a finger into on of her belt loop, tugging it so she somewhat falls into you. Using that to your advantage, swiftly turning and falling yourself. Landing flat with your back on the bed with her strategically on top of you.

Her surprised face hovering over yours, she hoists her leg over your torso, straddling your hips instinctively and putting you right back where you were only a few hours ago at your old apartment.

“Oops, wow! I can’t believe you would trip like that. So clumsy of you! Even if I do love meeting you like this…” tucking a loose piece of hair behind her ear.

“And what if I meet you like this” leaning in and brushing her lips against yours, the warmth between her legs gives a flash of familiarity, and her sultry tone brings a rush of endorphins, melting your heart and ruining any sense of composure you had.

“I can feel your heart beating…do I still make you nervous?” whispered against your lips before connecting them completely.

Soft and slow turns into passionate and needy very quickly.

The steamy make out session escalated into you tugging Nayeon’s shirt off, trying to minimize the time your lips spent apart.

Nayeon’s tongue tracing your lips before she stood up and started undoing on your belt, the clattering of her impatience matching the buckle as it hit the floor.

Hastily unbuttoning your pants, tugging them down without hesitation. She needed you, rapid movements serve as proof of her hunger, the way she doesn’t care how aggressively she’s ripping the black denim off your thighs.

Haphazardly tossing each piece of clothing as she rips it off you, first your belt, then your pants, and your shirt following very closely behind, your hands helping discard the unwanted fabric.

“Finally…I get to have you how I’ve been wanting you allll da-“

The doorbell cuts her sentence off.

“You’re kidding…” Nayeon’s body tenses, sighing as she runs a finger down your stomach as she rolls her eyes in disdain at who ever just pushed the button that caused the chime that stopped her from taking you the way she had been imagining.

“That would be dinner.” Giggling at her frustration, only adding to it.

Nayeon just rolls her eyes and stands up, grabbing her shirt and throwing it on while mumbling to herself and mindlessly flicking off the front door before opening it.

You opt to just slip on a pair of black sweat pants and walk around in your sports bra, leaving your bedroom and hearing her say thank you to the pizza delivery boy before latching the door shut and locking it.

Grabbing some paper plates from the kitchen, bringing them to the empty living room and sitting on the floor next to Nayeon, and turning the TV on to put on a random YouTube video while you guys eat.

Taking a few bites and then looking over at her, you see she’s scrolling through her phone with an annoyed look on her face.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“What do you think about this?” Flipping her phone around to show a coffee table with a glass top made of light wood and gold accents.

“Oh that’s cute!” Leaning into her and scrolling to see if it had any matching sets.

“So I was thinking” she starts, “what if we did like a sage green with gold accents and with like light wood and a lot of plants for the living room.” taking a bite of her slice of pizza and doing a little happy dance now that she’s finally eating.

“I love that idea but let’s do a little contrast.” Clicking on the black version of the gold laced table and showing her.

“Wait…you might be on to something here.” Scrolling down and seeing the matching furniture that goes along with the table.

“I did save a couch I saw, let me find it.” quickly pulling up the lighter green couch she had in mind and showing it to you.

“Oh, babe, that’s perfect!” Leaning over and kissing her cheeks before taking another bite of your pizza.

“I think it would match so well with the gold accents and…” she rattles on about

Spending the entirety of dinner talking about placement and furniture, you find yourselves tired from a long day of planning, organizing and moving things around.

Taking it upon yourself to pack up the left-overs from dinner in the kitchen, you can’t help but wonder where your girlfriend has gone off too.

“Nayeonieeeeeeeee!” called out when you hear her cackle from the master bedroom.

“I’m in here, baby!” echoed off the walls to the empty living room.

“You better not moving that bed again!” Sliding the pizza box into the fridge, laughing to yourself about the joke you just made.

“I’m NOT! Ugh!” you walk into your new shared bedroom to see Nayeon on FaceTime with Momo, talking about the moving process and how smoothly it went with the company she recommended.

Catching her attention was fairly easy as you were still very shirtless and the sweatpants you wore to cover up were a little big on you, falling off almost so the waistband of your underwear was sticking out for her to see.

“Momo when you come over tomorrow, we will give you a tour! Besides we still have some…things to…” she’s staring right at you, eye shifting from your exposed waistband up to your bare torso.

An idea pops into your head, an idea that would bring her to her knees and back to where you were an hour or two ago.

Making eye contact with her while she zones out, you tug on the string that is keeping your sweatpants anchored on your hips, letting them drop to the floor before you step out of them. Her jaw drops at how suddenly exposed you are with only your panties and your bra covering you…for now.

Slipping your fingers under the hem of what was covering your chest, you slowly pull it off over your head, leaving you in just your underwear. Twirling the bra by it’s strap around your finger, you fling it at her, it lands on her legs.

Nayeon’s eyes bugged out of her head, like a cartoon character, as she sat up - readjusting her position out of what seemed to be a little bit of gay panic mixed with anticipation.

“….hey, uhm…let me call you back.” Nayeon quickly hangs up the phone as Momo’s protest began through the speaker.

“Wait! Nayeon we have to talk abou-” click.

You have her right where you want her.

She stands, hastily making her way over to you. Hands reaching out to make contact, she’s pulling you in close, laying her hands on your hips and tracing small circles that travel to your lower back and to the waistband she was just staring at.

“You have all my attention, honey.” kissing your cheeks, trailing feather-light kisses down your jaw line and onto the side of your neck before bringing her lips back to yours.

Within minutes of this sweet dangerous kiss beginning, you’d devolve into a melted version of your former self with only her name stuck in your throat and the flavor of her lips at the tip of your tongue as it familiarizes itself with hers again, noting every predicted movement and sway of her as she holds you in front of her.

Arms raising up and resting on her shoulders, your fingers weave with her hair, pulling her into your further and pressing your chest against her same purple shirt from earlier.

“Take this off.” parting from her for only a moment to give her the command to remove the article of clothing that was in your way before returning your mouth to hers.

Maintaining eye contact, she rips her shirt over her head, tossing it somewhere else and continuing on the entanglement you were creating with her, unsnapping her bra and letting it chase her shirt to else where.

Now shirtless with you, chests pressing up against each other, she takes charge. Leading you to the “crooked” bed and pushing you down onto the sheets, playfully.

“Finally,” she breathes, unbuttoning her shorts and letting them fall to the floor and kicking them out of the way.

“I’ve been thinking about this since I saw you this morning. And when you carried me over the threshold?” clenching her entire body at the memory, a familiar shutter cascades through her body.

“I never wanted you more than in that moment…except for maybe right now.”

Watching as she relaxes again, her hands on either side of you, and she’s making half lidded eye contact with you when she brings a hand down your stomach, ghosting it over your underwear and reminding your body of what it was feeling earlier.

Leaning down to kiss you again, she’s intensifying her touch on you. Rubbing your clit through the now damp fabric of your underwear and letting you moan and whine into her mouth. The touch is fueling every fire you’ve felt in the last 12 hours.

“Fuck…Nayeon” whined into her mouth as she pulls your panties to the side, drenching her finger in your slick, coasting it up and down your slit while you match her movements with your hips.

She spends a moment kissing and toying with your chest, flicking your nipples with her tongue, lightly grazing her teeth over them. She slithers back up to your face and kisses you again.

“Finally touching you after a long day of wanting to feel you like this…” bringing her hand up to lick your essence off her long digits.

“To taste you like this…” bringing her lips down to yours, kissing you deeply and letting your own taste linger on your tongue.

Usually being the one that maintains composure, you were finding it difficult to keep the pace steady, after all the “almost” moments earlier today, you were having thoughts of just flipping her over and doing all the work.

Intense bodily reactions that are out of your control fling you into desperation, body begging for more of her touch, and gripping her harder to make sure she knows what you want, though it was obvious, your body language gave you away.

The rocking of your hips, the repressed moans, the less than pure lust that burned you from the inside were shinning through every single motion you made.

Nayeon noticed.

Her teeth graze your ear before she descended down your body with small bites, intentional swipes of her tongue and soft sweet pecks in between.

It wasn’t long before your ass was hanging off the edge of the bed and she was on her knees between your legs.

Without even looking at her, you can feel the smirk she has as she tugs on the elastic that was holding what was in her way up, and removes it - almost ripping it in the process.

“Damn, baby. You look so fucking good like this.” running her thumb up and over your clit a few times, teasing your entrance with every few passes.

Brain glitching under her touch, the cravings were too strong and you were too addicted to contain yourself any longer. Thrusting your hips down on her next tease of your entrance, her thumb slips inside you causing a guttural moan to leave your throat.

“Someone is eager.” giggled at you before removing her thumb, licking your slick off of it.

Whining in protest, you are about to beg for her when you feel it. The warmth of her tongue, starting at the bottom of your entrance and snaking its way up your folds and over your clit before latching onto it.

“Nayeon, ple- ooooh fuck!” hissed out in pleasure, hands flying up to the back of her head, wrapping her hair up in your hands and holding it into a makeshift ponytail as her tongue made work of you.

A delicate dance that she was more than good at, teasing and flicking at your sensitive bud before finally starting the pattern that she knew was what was going to keep you right where she needed you.

Sucking and smacking while she whirled her tongue in tightknit circles around your clit, completely focused on the way your back was arching, body twitching underneath her, and the sounds you were making for her.

Moaning her name, the breathy “oh fucks”, and the unprovoked “please please please” always made a mess of her underwear. She loved to hear you in this way, loved to have you in such a vulnerably delicious position to which she could bring you every ounce of pleasure you could ever want.

The build up ensues, the tightly woven tension in your core was stacking like tetris on the want that had been taunting you all day. Deep, primal yearning for your partner was all consuming and it was apparent that the feeling was mutual.

That’s when you feel it, her long pointer finger teasing your entrance, waiting for you to do exactly what Nayeon knew you would. Thrusting your hips down onto her finger and grinding onto it, doing the work for her while she quickened the pace of her circular movements on your clit.

The vibration of her chuckling with her mouth still attached to you was excruciating. Giggling at your neediness only made the desperation worse, vibrating and stimulating the very sensitive bud causing the pot to boil over, burning the coil that threatened to snap at any moment.

“Baby…oh fuck, I’m gonna fucking cum” pulling her head closer to you and grinding harder down on her finger.

Nayeon smiles, curling her finger up one, two, three times and then rips herself away from you.

Completely dismantling everything she just built, ruining the orgasm and sending you into a spiral of desperation and anger.

“Fuck, WHY would you do THAT?!” panting out furiously as you sit up on your elbows so you can glare at the cheeky smile she’s got plastered on her face.

Rolling your eyes and slamming yourself back down on the mattress, you hear the sound of leather sliding across the wooden nightstand. Nayeon stands, stepping into the harness of the all too familiar strap-on that was very present on nights like this.

The actual strap was different than your usual one, noting that the rings were more angular, the color of the leather was slightly darker, and you couldn’t help but notice the new attachment that was fixed to the strap that would go between Nayeon’s legs.

Slipping it inside herself with ease, a whimper leaving her lips while she buckled herself in and prepared for what was to come.

Feeling yourself drip in anticipation, the pooling of slick underneath you was rapidly growing out of control as Nayeon tugged your hips closer to the edge of the bed.

You could feel the tip of the familiar toy pressing against your folds as she leaned down and softly bit your chest. Shivers of anticipation radiated through your bones as you patiently waited for her to make the initial thrust that would turn into you becoming undone underneath her.

Breathing picking up for both of you, the tension so thick between you that every touch from her felt like jolts of static electricity that had the power of lightening.

“Baby…” unable to wait anymore, you had thought about her this way all day, on top of you with that half lidded smirk.

“Please.” Cupping her face, bringing her closer to you while lifting your legs up and wrapping them around her hips.

Taking the hint, she eases her hips forward, sinking her strap into you painstakingly slow, inch by inch until she was completely bottomed out inside you.

Moaning into her mouth as you continue to passionately make out, she takes it slow with you. Sensually rocking her hips gently and letting her hands wander your body while your tongues explored each others mouths.

Hardly any words shared at all, the moment too intense, and all too intimate to even think of exchanging witty banter. Hushed moans and whines filling the minimal space between the you and her, mixed in with the pure pleasure and the eager pants from Nayeon.

Bliss drapes your body with each thrust Nayeon made, you gave a small gasp at each stroke she laid into you. Paired with her own sounds of pleasure, you were consumed by her.

“I’m gonna cum…fuck” whispered to her with intense eye contact that has her breath hitching. Her thrusts speed up, a steady crescendo building up higher and higher in both of you until finally hit the point of pure ecstasy.

Your vision blurs as your body trembles, moans escaping your throat in rapid succession. Drenched in ecstasy, you twitch and buck your hips, riding out the waves of your intense orgasm.

Nayeon glistens with a thin sheen of sweat as she maintains her rhythm. Despite your body clenching around the strap, making it challenging for her to continue, she perseveres undeterred, chasing her own pleasure while overstimulating you.

A stream of passionate words accompanies the matching sounds as you both murmur intensely to each other. Nayeon grasps your hands, pinning them above your head, her hips snapping faster and faster.

Watching her closely through your post orgasm haze, you observe her brows furrowing—a sign she's nearing her peak.

As her rhythm falters, you seize the moment. Using your legs, you swiftly roll her over, positioning yourself on top of her.

Grinding down on the strap, now building another orgasm as it rubs against all the right spots, you can feel her body tensing under you.

“Cum for me, baby. I know how much you wanting this all day.” Sultry tone sensually whispered to her as you begin to slam yourself down on her, letting the attachment do the work.

Her eyes roll back, body tensed, back arched as she releases- a mess created on the sheets. Her whimpers loud, hands grasping at you, trying to tug you closer to her and successfully doing so.

Her nails dig into your hips as she guides you up and down on her, mouths connecting, your hand crawling up to weave into her hair.

“Oh fuck…feels so fucking good” breathed against her lips, her hands snake under your thighs, stopping you from riding her.

Thrusting up into you, holding you up while you drape your body over hers, allowing yourself to untether and get lost in the moment.

“Give me one more, honey. I know you want to.” Followed by a few bites to your neck.

The want in her words were enough to send you over the edge once more. She wraps her arms around you, holding you into place while continuing to trust up into you, creating a plethora of sounds that would put any adult film to shame.

Slowly coming down, you bury your face in her neck and smile into her.

“Ugh that was so worth the wait.” huffed into her skin as she draws little pictures with her nails on your back, writing words like “I love you” and your name and her name with hearts.

“Are you writing poetry on my back?” quizzically asked with a hint of sleepiness as you sit up on her.

“I don’t need to write poetry on what already is poetry, my love.” sitting up to deeply kiss you and hug you, all while the strap is still inside you.

Standing up to go and grab another set of sheets, Nayeon takes a moment to clean the strap in the bathroom, dry it off, and put it back in the drawer.

Returning to the bed, you pull the sheets off, walking through your house to place them in the washer and flick it on before you return to the room.

Nayeon and you make the bed together, changing the pillow cases so they match the new sheets you just placed on them.

“Do you want to take a quick shower with me?” after finally placing the comforter on the bed.

Nayeon walks over to you, putting her arms around your waist and kissing you again.

“Absolutely” leading you to the bathroom so you can wash up together.

Turning to her after she turns the shower on, you smirk at her.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” she scoffs, pulling out some towels from the linen closet for you both to use.

“I just love you…also, I think the bed IS crooked…at least it is now…” giggling at her.

Nayeon just glares at you, you can almost see her eye twitch with rage when she finally exclaims:

“SEE, I TOLD YOU IT WAS CROOKED!”

[enbypotat53]

Okay so it's 3:45am and I'm nowhere near coherent enough or in a sound enough frame of mind to make a long post but I'm sure most people have seen the stuff popping up around ColeTheGeek (aka the creator of C2BC) including racism, harassing fans, hostile work environments, and keeping in touch with (as well as defending) Gery.

I do not, and will never support that shit. I'm disgusted and beyond livid about all of this and I don't fucking know what to do. I'm leaving the fanart I've made up FOR NOW, as I'm exhausted and stressed and not really in the right place of mind to think about just how much time I've sunk into this fucking fandom and how attached I got to its characters for nothing. I finally found another character I could wholeheartedly relate to and now I'm probably never going to be able to see them in the same way again because the creator couldn't just make the simple decision to be normal, and that just. Makes me feel sick. And I don't feel right doing the whole "seperate the creator from creation" thing. I don't know why. Sorry I'm rambling a lot but my brain is spiralling, I've made so many friends in this fandom already and sunk so much time into making fanart because I ADORED this show and it gave me so much inspiration. I'm just glad I never donated money to him, y'know?

Okay I've been typing long enough, I'm going to bed. Just wanted to put my thoughts down because I know I won't be able to sleep otherwise (I probably still won't but y'know.) Idk if I'll delete this later and try to make one that's worded better but for now I'm just gonna try to sleep and hope this was all a nightmare.

[claws-and-quills]

Ch. 1: Unspoken Connections

Tag list:

@callsignred @bloody-kissez @takeyour-pants-off @robynanthonystark @aoi-targaryen

Chapter one to Nights of Redemption

Word Count: 4.4k

TW: death of a parent, sibling death, disconnect of family

A/N: Do feel free to change the main characters name of Tessa Harper. It gets a bit tiring for me to type/read (Y/N) in fics.

Icy cold rain gently drizzled all around you. Your sinuses ached and head throbbed from the amount of tears you had shed over the past week. Nathan, your elder brother, slowly curled his arms around you as the casket that contained your father was slowly lowered into his final resting place. You couldn't believe that he was actually gone.

“I'm here, Tess. I'm here. Ssshhh…I know…” Nate murmured against the crown of your hair. He was all you had left for who you considered family. Sure, your mother was still alive, but your relationship with her wasn't the strongest. He tightens his grip on you as you try to choke back a sob. Your shoulders shook at the violent sobs that came from you, but no tears fell from your eyes.

“Why…why did it have to be dad?” You ask against his chest. Nate hummed quietly, shaking his head as he tried to find any words of comfort for you, but they continued to elude him. Reluctantly, you allow Nate to quietly lead you away from the grave. Even though he didn't show it, he couldn't bear the sight of watching your father be laid to a permanent rest.

“I…I don't know, Tess. Look at me, sis. Hey…we'll get through this. Haven't we always gotten through things together?” Nate leans down to kiss your cheek, pulling you into another tight embrace. “C'mon…us Harper kids can get through anything…” it wasn't a complete lie. Nate had been with you through everything. After your parents divorced and your mother swindled her way into winning custody, Nate was your rock, your best friend. He always tried his damndest to protect you and keep you happy; he'd keep you safe from the abusive tirades of your mother and her questionable taste in men. Deep down, you wished it was her that had died and not your father, but even that thought made you feel sick to your stomach. An icy chill ran down your spine; you could feel the cold eyes boring straight through your body.

“Tessa. Nathan. It was a pleasant surprise to see that you both actually showed up. It's certainly been a while,” Cynthia, your mother, spoke. Her voice was laced with disdain towards both you and Nathan. You could feel Nathan physically grow tense, anger radiating from his body.

“What do you want?” Nathan hissed towards her. A look of disappointment in his eyes as you had turned to face Cynthia.

“Now, is that any way to speak to your mother?” Cynthia chides with a sourly sweet tone that makes you feel sick to your stomach. “Can a mother not come to seek comfort in the arms of her own children?”

“Comfort? Comfort?! You want comfort?! You wouldn't even let us sit with the rest of the family, you spiteful, money hungry, maniacal, bitch!” The words flew from your mouth before you could register what was even happening. All of your emotions, years of turmoil, unresolved anger and pain, it all came out at once.

~o0o~

Your alarm clock blared, bringing your dream to a screeching halt. Opening your eyes, you grab your phone from the bedside table to be met with 15 missed calls from your friend Maria. Then, your eyes focused on the time at the top of your screen. 9:45am.

“Fuck! Oh shit!” You scramble to get out of bed. Last night was a long and rough night at the club you worked at, leaving you exhausted enough to sleep through the 3 alarms you had set. Your legs became entangled in the sheets on the bed, causing you to fall against the wooden floor with a loud thud. There was no sense in trying to shower the night away. It was your first round of exams in college. You could hear your instructor in the back of your mind, lecturing about the importance and professionalism of punctuality.

“Son of a bitch…” You mumbled to yourself, tugging on a pair of jeans that you prayed was clean. Life had gone to shit after the passing of your father. The falling out you had with Cynthia affected everyone in your family. After the paperwork for your father's will was settled, it was decided that you and Nate wanted out from under Cynthia's thumb. So, you both chose to move away on the money you each inherited from your father.

It seemed like the right thing to do at that moment. You knew there was no way in hell that you and Nate could stay around Cynthia. For years, you had always promised your father that you would become something . After his passing, Nate became your cheerleader in life. He had pushed you to pursue your dream of going into nursing due to your gene mutation. You could smell illness, and heal most ailments and injuries. But that victory only lasted two years before Nate was taken from you after being involved in a car crash. Life seemed to have it out for you.

“This had better be worth it, Nate. I'm doing this for you and dad.” You muttered to yourself, and snatched your keys from the kitchen counter. Lemmy, your grey tabby, meows at you for breakfast. You cursed silently under your breath, dropping a hearty scoop of kibble into his bowl. “I'm sorry, Lemme! Mama is running late! I'll be back later, buddy!” You call from over your shoulder and rush out the door.

Life has been chaotic over the past several months. Before his untimely death, Nate had become involved in the wrong crowd through unhealthy coping mechanisms. Always finding himself in and out of trouble, always landing himself behind bars. No matter how angry you got with him, no matter the price, you always stood in his corner, always bailing him out. Now, you were alone. Money began to dwindle, and something had to be done to keep you afloat. Bill piled up, and responsibilities never ceased to stop. After odd job, after odd job, and confiding in Maria, she helped you land a job at a strip club. Not the most glamorous job, but it helped make ends meet.

Speeding through the streets, you narrowly make it in time for your class. There were two minutes left before the door would be locked. Once inside of the classroom, you collapse into your seat next to Maria. Your hair was a disheveled mess and your clothes were wrinkled, but at least you made it on time. There were still dried remnants of makeup, glitter, sweat and alcohol on your body, but none of that mattered at this point. The fear of letting down Nate and your father was the only thing that kept you going.

“T, you look like shit. What happened?!” Maria hissed under her breath. Her brown eyes were sympathetic, but she failed to hide the slight amusement at her lips. She had been doing this for far longer than you, so she was used to the long, sleepless nights, unlike you.

“I don't even remember. I slept through everything. Alarms. Phone calls. Texts. If college doesn't kill me, this job will.” You tried to muse to the best of your abilities, but it was to no avail. Who were you kidding? Surely not Maria, and definitely not yourself. You refused to take a semester off after the passing of Nate out of fear of never going back.

“Give it a few more weeks. You'll get used to it. Look at me! I'm just cruising on through. No stress. No worries. Just think of it as partying every night instead of working. Live a little. Let loose. Stop clutching your pearls all the time. We're young, wild, and free! Us against the world-”

A gruff grumble cuts her off. You both look up at Mr. Thomas and the stack of exams he held in his arm. He sets down an exam in front of you and Maria. There's a disapproving scowl at his lips towards you and the way you were dressed. His gaze made you feel so small, insignificant, and helpless. Ever since day one, it felt like he had a vendetta against you. You couldn't quite place a finger on it, but you just had this feeling that he hated you without reason. Sighing, you turn your attention to the stapled packet that sat in front of you on the table. Maria shares one last sympathetic glance your way before diving into the exam. It takes you a few moments, but you finally decompress enough to open the test packet.

An agonizing 45 minutes later, you find yourself to be the one lone student left in the classroom. There was still an extra 30 minutes left, but it was so hard to concentrate. Your mind flitted around aimlessly as you bounced between questions. After staring at the words for God knows how long, the letters began to blend together in a blackened alphabet soup on the papers. The knot in your stomach twisted and churned like a raging hurricane of anxiety and sleep deprivation. The longer you stared at the words, the deeper the splitting migraine dug into your skull like an icepick or a hot poker. Twenty questions remained out of the seventy-five. You could do this.

“Ten minutes Miss Harper. I have a meeting to be at in fifteen minutes.” Mr. Thomas spoke, breaking the tense silence that suffocated the room. You merely nod, panic threatening to settle in at the sudden rush reminder. Cursing under your breath, you try your best to guess at the questions with a level of educated common sense. It was days like this you wished you could just disappear and run from your responsibilities. Once finished, you bring the exam to him without a word and exit from the room.

“You really need some food, maybe a nap, and smelling salts. I have cash for food. C'mon, my treat.” Maria gave you a small smile and gestures for you to follow after her. “Besides, I still owe you one for letting me sleep at your place. Consider it even, okay?”

“Only if you bash my head open with a hammer. This headache is killing me. Ugh…I don't know how you do this, Maria. How the hell do you balance everything? Like…seriously.” You admit to her, earning a soft laugh from Maria. Even though your schedule was relatively easy, you were still dumbfounded by how easy Maria made everything look. Following Maria, she brings you out to the parking lot to her car. It was messy, but you didn't mind too much. The idea of food and Tylenol was your main focus.

“Most I can do is some food, and pills for your head. Now, for food. We have campus food, or we can go to that new café that opened down the street from the Scarlet.” Maria wiggles her hips excitedly in her seat, earning a small chuckle from you. As much as you hated the idea of being so close to work, you were too tired to argue against it. At your silence, she takes it as a yes and starts up the car, speeding out of the parking lot. “Morning Glory, it is! Who knows, we might run into some guys there. I've heard that the entire block is under the care of some gang. Not like the bad type of gang though.”

“Maria! Do I look like I'm in any condition to meet anyone? I look like shit. I didn't even shower…I have glitter in places I didn't know I even had!” You grab onto the ‘oh shit’ handle as she makes a sharp turn around a corner. As much as you adored your friend, she was absolutely reckless compared to you. Where you were more of the shy, introverted, and awkward type, Maria was the polar opposite. She was boisterous, charming, extroverted, and was the life of any party. Sometimes you questioned how you two even became friends.

“Oh it's not that bad. Besides, guys like a girl that can cut loose at night. I really think getting you some dick will do you some good.” She laughs as you smack her on the arm. Her eyes soften a little towards you from the corner of her gaze. “Okay, maybe we won't get you dick today. But maybe we can change that tonight. I've noticed the way some of the guys stare at you when you're working the pole. You're a natural!”

“Maria…I don't need some one night stand to make me feel better. I'm fine. We Harper's can get through anything.” Even you didn't quite fully believe yourself on that. Maybe Maria had a point. The idea of just sleeping with someone made your skin feel clammy. It just wasn't your style.

“I dunno. You need something though.” At the red light, she turns to look at you. Her eyes truly soften this time. She mouths a small ‘oh’ to herself at the realization. “Hey…it's gonna be okay. You're not alone. You have me in your corner. We can call out for tonight, order some takeout, watch some movies. Whatever you want. Whatever you need.”

A single tear rolls down your cheek despite your efforts to keep your tears at bay. As nice as that sounded, you knew you couldn't do that. One bad day didn't mean that life would stop for you. “No, no I'll be okay. Really. Staying out of that apartment might do me some good. Especially tonight. I don't need to be wallowing in self pity. It's not going to bring dad or Nate back. Pretty sure it's mostly cause I'm getting hangry.”

“Bitch, did you not eat today? Did you drink water? Anything?” Maria facepalms at your sheepish expression. She shakes her head in dismay, wailing down on the horn in front of her for not moving when the light turns green. “Move your ass! The light’s green, bitch! Go! We're hungry back here!”

You burst out laughing as some middle aged man hangs out of the window, flipping off Maria. She gladly returns the gesture, followed with a string of obscenities towards him. That was Maria for you. Loud, boisterous, and always getting into some type of trouble. Turning on the street past the light, you barely recognize The Scarlet Oasis during the day. The parking lot was empty, neon lights and signs were shut off; it looked like any other abandoned building. Catty corner across the street was the café that Maria spoke out. Its parking lot appeared to be fairly busy. Several Cars and motorcycles were parked all around the small café.

“Let's at least make your hair look a little less, wild I guess.” Maria teases to which you rolled your eyes. She helps you straighten your hair up a bit along with trying to wipe some of the excess glitter from your cheeks, throat, and chest. She nods, thoroughly pleased with her work and gestures for you to follow her inside. Stepping into that café felt like a step into the past. 60s music played over the speakers, welcoming you almost instantly. Red leather booths lined the walls; matching stools hugged the white marble top bar, matching with the black and white checkered patterned floor. This café was a living time machine. Your first genuine thought was just how much Nate and your dad would have loved this place.

Your eyes scan the entire café. It felt oddly cozy and reminded you of home in a different and better time. Many of the patrons looked to be fairly older than you and Maria, not that it mattered, at least not until your eyes scan over a table nestled in the far off corner of the café. There was a group of several men and three women there. But one in particular caught your attention. Your eyes were immediately drawn to his sun kissed skin, and toned arms. His black hair was swept back, almost resembling a 70s greaser appearance. Maria bumps your arm with her elbow, bringing you back down to reality.

“See something you like? Oh damn, get it girl.” Maria follows your gaze. Her words make your cheeks burn with a deep blush. Grabbing her hand, you tug her over to a booth, hopefully out of sight of the group you had been brainlessly staring at.

“Shut up! Oh my god…I can't go over there! Are you crazy?!” You hissed under your breath at her. Your breath catches in your throat, catching a brief glimpse of the man again. Even from this distance, his eyes felt intense on you. You quickly hide your face behind a menu in hopes of hiding your embarrassment. Maria's snickering makes you kick her shin from under the table with a glare. “Be quiet…!”

“Can I get you ladies started with something to drink? Perhaps an appetizer or two?” A warm voice asks from the other side of the menu. You lift your eyes to see the waiter. He was young, but had a charming smile. Pietro was printed on the name tag he wore.

“Yes. I'll take lemon water, and my friend here will have the same. Also, can we get a blooming onion for our app?” Maria bats her eyelashes at Pietro. He nods his head, scribbling away on his notepad.

“Sure thing. Coming right up, ladies.” He smiles warmly before disappearing behind the bar. You exhale heavily, rubbing your temples. Your cheeks heat up again at the sly smirk that Maria gives you.

“Don't. No. Don't talk.” You hiss lowly under your breath at her. She holds her hands up in mock innocence, grinning from ear to ear. Within minutes, Pietro is back at your booth with drinks and a steaming hot blooming onion.

“You ladies ready to order? We have a special today on our club sandwiches. Buy two and you get a complimentary sundae. We also have a special on our brunch platter. Big enough to fill two.” Pietro mentions warmly.

“Oohh, let's do the brunch platter, T. It'll be good leftovers for tonight after work!” Maria looks up to Pietro with a nod to seal the order. You chuckle quietly, shrugging in submission and agreement to her.

“An excellent choice. I will be back shortly with that platter for you ladies.” He gives you both a wink before disappearing again after taking your menus away. You exhale again, trying to keep your eyes from wandering over to the man at the table on the other side of the café.

“So, little miss goodie two-shoes likes her men older.” Maria shimmies her shoulders at you, earning a scoff from you. “I mean, you know what they say…men do it better. More experienced. More mature.” Each word she mutters makes your blush return to your cheeks. You kick her leg again from under the table with a glare to your eyes. She rubs her shin, laughing quietly to herself. “Relax, it's not like he can hear you. But….he's really not that bad lookin’ if I must say so myself.”

“Stop staring. Stop staring…Maria! Stop staring! Oh god, he's looking this way again…” You panic, hiding your eyes behind your glass of water as you eagerly drink. Maria snorts out a laugh at your panicking, rolling her eyes with a quiet tsk towards you. Of your months of friendship, never had she ever seen you like this before. Taking another glance over your cup, you nearly choke on your water. “Maria…Maria…! Look at me! I think I've seen him in the Scarlet before. Oh crap…”

Maria arches a brow at you, wiggling her hips with a wide grin. “You have to try to get a private dance with him then. No questions asked. You have to do it now. Who knows, you might actually get lucky. Ow! That one hurt!” She kicks you back in the leg with a scowl. “I'm buying you food.” By this time, Pietro returns to your table, setting down plates of food for each of you. There was more than enough food to feed you and Maria. There would be leftovers for days, not that you minded it. Maria nods gratefully to him with a wide smile of thanks.

Stabbing your fork into a piece of waffle, you chew thoughtfully, allowing yourself to actually enjoy food for once. It gave you a reason and something else to focus on as silence fell between you and Maria. Each of you enjoying the fresh, hot food and catchy music. It was refreshing, this little impromptu brunch date. You allowed the good food and good music to distract you from the stress of the day. For the first time in four years, you were actually smiling on the anniversary of laying your father to rest. You look at Maria and give her a grateful smile. The sound of heavy boots against the tile floor breaks the silence, capturing the attention of you and Maria.

You trail your eyes up the figure of the dark haired male as he walks to the register at the bar. You couldn't help but admire the way the white beater he wore hugged his broad chest and showed off his chiseled arms. His jeans flaunted the curvature of muscular legs and a very toned ass. Maria gives you a knowing look, hiding her grin behind her glass, but you shake your head vigorously. There was no way in hell that you were going to try to make conversation with this man. You can hear his gravely and bassy voice as he spoke with Pietro.

“Seems like you got yourself quite the fan base growing,” Pietro teases the older man. You could feel the color drain from your face as you strain to hear.

“Ah, can it, kid. I've got bigger problems to worry about. Is there anything new that we should be worried about? Or have you been too busy fraternizing?” The darker male hushed with annoyance. The sound of his voice almost gave you chills.

“There's gonna be a meet tonight. Down past Fisk Tower. Old warehouse by the docks. They're looking for good sports.” Pietro glances around before continuing. “Should be late tonight. Supposed to be a nice coin purse on it.”

“Stop talking like an idiot. So it's a big payout? Or is it just big to you, bub?” The dark haired man grumbles under his breath. Your breath catches in your throat, accidentally meeting his intense gaze. He gives you a brief once over before returning his attention to Pietro.

“I've heard it's around three thousand. You'd slaughter them, though. I mean, you're The Wolverine after all.” Pietro playfully punches the older man in the arm, earning himself a disapproving glare. The name piqued your interest immediately. The Wolverine. You silently pondered the name to yourself. Was that some street name? Was this man one of those gangsters that Maria had mentioned before? Regardless, something about his energy and aura practically sucked you into him with interest.

“Ah, that's hardly worth my time. Too much energy for such a small payout.” The darker haired man grumbles. He could feel your eyes on him, a small smirk tugging the corner of his lips. “Put whatever they got on my tab, bub. Can't spend the whole day hanging out here. But, you call me if you see any of those Brotherhood assholes over here.”

Your heart practically leaped into your throat as this man known as The Wolverine turned away from the register, settling his eyes on you for a brief moment. He takes a few steps towards your table, but before he can get a word out, his presumed friends call out to him, distracting him away from you. He tilts his head to the side just slightly before following after the group he had been sitting with. A gasping breath finally escapes you that you hadn't realized you had been holding during that brief moment. Your heart pounded deep within your chest. Maria stares at you with wide eyes before a toothy grin breaks across her lips.

“Oh. My. God. Bitch! He's totally into you! Holy shit. Tess…you have to meet him somehow tonight.” Maria stares at you with wide and excited eyes. She was beaming at you with such unbridled excitement that you were expecting her to implode there on the spot.

“No. Absolutely not. Maria…we don't know a single thing about him. No way. No, ma'am.” You shake your head vigorously towards her. There was no way in hell you would entertain her crazy ideas. Even with him gone, though, you could still feel his intense eyes on you.

“Oh please, he was basically undressing you with his eyes. If you don't act on this, I will,” she smirked cheekily at you, signaling to Pietro that she was ready for the check. He brings over the receipt for the already paid check, offering a cheeky smile to her. Your cheeks burned a dark red at the mere thought, making you fold your arms across your chest in an attempt to cover yourself. Was he really, though?

“Already taken care of. Can I bring you ladies some to-go boxes?” Pietro asks, glancing between you and Maria both and then the remaining food on the plates. There was definitely enough for leftovers to last you and Maria both. After gathering up the remnants of brunch, you exit the cafe next to Maria. You still couldn't shake the feeling that burned through your body. It was like nothing you had ever experienced before. Even after sitting in the car with Maria, that feeling still churned in the pits of your gut.

“Maybe we should frequent that little café more. Who knows, maybe next time he'll actually talk to you,” Maria snickers, laughing heartily at the smack you give her on the leg. “Oh come on! You're totally into him!”

“Maria! I saw the man one time! Don't be stupid. I mean…let's be real here. Not even in my wildest of fantasies would I have a chance with someone like that,” you scoff to yourself. That you truly believed. Between you and Maria, you were the more innocent one in the friendship. Even with your night job, there were levels of you that were still innocent. Sure, you showed off your body, but it was just a part of your job. “Besides…I'm pretty sure I've seen him in the Scarlet. No way in hell would he want to get involved with me.”

“Uhm? Hello?! Free lap dances?! You're fucking gorgeous. Limber as hell. And let's face it, you can work a pole. Stop being a Debbie-downer. I'm trying to get you laid.” You rolled your eyes at her remark. She was never going to let you live this one out. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not ever.

[blazterrr]

Do you have any theories on yakumo backatory? :3-🍰 Annon

Whoever you are, bless you. I mean, seriously. I have more than one, and really I have no idea which one I stick to, so I'm just gonna drop all I got. And this panel is what I'll be mainly using for

Why that specifically? Well, in the start of chapter 339, where I took that from, we do get to see panels of what seem to be the backgrounds of Shiki members, or that's what it seems like at least. Taking Kujaku and Fourth for example in this image

Both having their backgrounds presented + the text for each one of them fits them as well. That explaination wasn't that proper please forgive me my english is lowkey ass—

But anyway, back to that panel of Yakumo, let me point out some stuff from it and give some information for each:

Wagasa

A wagasa, also known as an oil paper umbrella, is a type of paper umbrella that originated in China but eventually spread across other countries, including Japan. Besides the ones shown in that panel, we can also see Yakumo holding one in chapter 321 (TWO for blood or smth incase if necessary-)

Since we only saw him using one for like... Two panels only, it probably won't be too accurate to say, but judging from how the head wheel and hand wheel look less thicker than a Chinese Wagasa, then his is most likely a Japanese one.

Onto the history and traditional stuff: When Wagasa were first introduced to Japan from China, they were initially used to shield the upper classes from sunlight and present/meddling evil spirits, which is why they were often red, just like seen in the image. But besides that history, in religious celebrations and weddings, they also used to shelter people from rain and sunlight, and to drive evil spirits away.

Besides red, that was mainly used to symbolize driving evil spirits away, there are other colors aswell: Purple ones to symbolize longevity for elders, and White ones were used in funerals.

How would any of that information be related to Yakumo? Well:

1) He might be either Japanese or Chinese. And if none, probably follows the culture/traditions.

2) Incase if he died years ago and then was brought back to life, maybe he was a part of mentioned upperclassmen, or at least belonged to a family that is one.

3) Following the "past life thing" in case if he had one, maybe he had a deep belief of evil spirits, or was involved with any of them. Orrrr if he did belong to some family, maybe they had a strong belief that those exist in the religion/tradition they follow.

4) Maybe that Wagasa was never his in the first place but someone else's that he knows and got that from.

(These are probably worded pretty badly, but bear with me it's 4:45AM lolol.)

Temari Balls

Finding the name of it sure did take me time with Google images because I had no idea what they're called before doing research, but anyway:

They're a folk art form and Japanese craft that originated in China and got introduced to Japan around the 7th. History wise, they were constructed from the remants of old kimono, and as time passed by traditional temari became an art, with more decorative and detailed ways of stitching them. With the introduction of rubber to Japan, they went from toys to art objects, and even became an art and craft of the Japanese upperclassmen and aristocracy.

Since these balls (haha balls) were made with pieces of silk fabric, that pretty much does have a relation with Yakumo being a humanoid spider who is able to use his silk to create clothing and... other stuff like in this official art where he tells Kujaku about it.

And speaking of art being decorative detailed, Yakumo's design seems to fit that description too (seriously have you seen him??? Gorgeous, beautiful and allat).

There was also a mention that temari balls became an art and craft of the Japanese upperclass and aristocracy, which could be an another hint that Yakumo might've belonged to them/was a part of them in one way or another. Or, if doing art and craft like these was that impressive to those people, then there could be a what if Yakumo was a middle/lower class and then at some point got noticed by an upperclass. That's about the history part, anyway.

Onto the tradition part: Temari balls are highly valued and cherished gifts that symbolize deep friendship and loyalty. There are also the colors and threads used for the making that are symbolic of wishing the recipient a brilliant and a happy life.

I think the closest we've seen to "friendship" coming from Yakumo with anyone else is his duo with Six. It may not be known exactly if they're friends, or if they consider each other as that, but we've seen them interact together as if they're very much used to each other's shit, so there might be some close bond with these two. I mean, aside from Isou, I think Yakumo is also someone Six seems to be pretty much comfortable to be around judging from their interactions. Is it a sign for friendship or nah? In my opinion, there is definitely something with these two like some sort of bond and high tolerance.

The loyalty part might be related to his interactions with Six, but the meaning could also go to his loyalty to Shiki, with him sticking up to finding that part for the key Mashiro's ass is after to complete the general plan of the organization (that's how it is in the plan at least—).

For the "happy and brilliant life" part — In the end of chapter 323, he said: "We don't have any lingering attachment to this world". Past life or current one, he probably doesn't view any of those as "brilliant or happy", considering how people (including 002 ig) view and treat togabito beings. Could be he decided to be a part of Shiki to look for one? A better world with a better life? Or he lost all hope from the meaning of life or smth /j

Back to the traditional stuff: Temari balls are also often given to children from their parents on New Year's Day, and the mother who made them puts a small piece of paper with a goodwill wish for the child, and they (the child) can never be told what wish their mother made while making the ball.

I dunno if I really wanna stick to that theory, but if Yakumo had a mother, what if she used to make a ball for her son every new years and he would have a bunch of those and had a deep attachment to those. Maybe he believed that if he stayed loyal to the tradition and never ask her about the wish then his life would stay as happy and peaceful.

Now, about this

As you can tell, his spider legs that are usually seen on his forehead... Are not there! (Shocker.)

Since that image is most likely presenting his past, then what if Yakumo wasn't born as a togabito and only fell under the definition of one after being experimented on? Kind of like how it happened with Manji, who used to be Ban.

Or, a different way to view it, what if Yakumo hid the fact he's a humanoid spider by pretending to be a part of the ordinary human beings, and had to hide his spider legs just like in that image.

... Or maybe some togabitophobic people chopped them off??? Dunno lol.

Kimono

And now, something I haven't mentioned until now: his kimono. Really pretty, gorgeous even, but see there's this rule of wearing it: "Always wear the left side over the right side. Only dead people have their kimono worn right over left". Like this, basically:

If you look at Yakumo's design, he is wearing it in the proper way of the living, right over left, just like the woman I've shown:

There could be two theories rising from that:

1) Yakumo never died in the past or his recent life in any way.

2) He did die in the past, but is wearing his kimono like that in order to bland in with the living, basically fooling others who barely know him (or they know him but he just wants to fuck with us).

And a side but not too major theory I had for him in general: Maybe he used to be a god, or anything close to it? Or was blessed by one? I got that idea from his personality of having an enjoyment to do things flashily and show off, just like how he did so in the arc with Team F when killing the guards and 002 and even showing her his special threads or... Yeah you get what I mean. And there is also the fact that he had a speech/moment referencing the short story "The Spider's Thread" by Akutagawa that gave me that idea, but I'm not too sure how to explain it.

So in summary (???) I guess what I brought up as theories for his backstory are:

1) Belonging/Related to a upperclass / noble family in one way or another

2) Follows or is somehow close with tradition and/or religion

3) Might have been a human before becoming togabito

4) There might be a chance he died in the past but then was brought back to life

And I think that's all.

Excuse me if it's messy, I'm not that good with explaining myself and my theories, but feel free to talk to me about it lolol.

[asturniolos]

you too - matt s.

chapter one (intro) ; mystery boy

chapter 2

chapter 3

chapter 4

in which;

living out of an apartment in the city, it's your second year of university and things are going smoothly. one morning, your best friend annie tells you about a new boy attending your university; matthew sturniolo. he's hot, smart, and exactly your type. you don't think much of it, but once you meet him yourself, you can't seem to get him out of your mind- or your bed- and neither can he. but how long can you keep matt's triplet brothers, chris and nick, from finding out?

warnings - none (for this chapter !)

6:45am

my eyes slowly open to the sunrise slightly peeking through my window and the sound of birds chirping as i roll over, tap 'snooze' on my alarm, and sigh when i see what time it is. i rub my eyes and try to fight the tiredness flooding my body. as much as i love being to able to study literature at my dream university, waking up this early for lectures sucks.

today is tuesday, meaning i have almost 2 hours with my least favourite professor; mr bryan. luckily, my best friend annie, short for annalise, is picking me up afterward for brunch at starbucks. i would drive us there but unlike me, annie got her license the second she turned 16. i tried to get my license three times but didn't pass once and am way too scared of failure to re-try it. we're both 19 now and she's basically been my personal Uber for the last few years.

i rub my eyes once more, pulling the sheets off my body and standing up. i instantly walk to my bathroom and splash a hand full of cold water onto my face to help wake me up.

as I start to brush my teeth, i decide the silence in my apartment needs to be broken with some music. i walk back into my room and grab my speaker off the top of my dresser as well as my phone, opening spotify and clicking shuffle play on my liked songs.

valentine by COIN starts playing as a smile is suddenly plastered on my face.

"perfect.", i whisper to myself, turning the volume up by a few and walking back to the bathroom.

~

7:42am

blue.. or pink?  i tilt my head at my reflection and struggle to decide which long-sleeve shirt to wear.

"y/n? you there?"

screw it. i'll just wear a hoodie.

"...y/n?"

"sorry! i'll meet you out front in 5.", i apologise, remembering i'm on facetime with annie.

"ok.. don't take too long, i have something to tell you. and it's literally freezing out here. love you!"

"bye! love you too, annie!", i exclaim, making a kissy face at the camera before hanging up. i place my phone in the back pocket of my jeans and pull my favourite grey hoodie down from my dresser, sliding it slowly over my head so i don't mess up my hair too much. i grab my airpods and a random lip gloss from my bedside table and stuff them in my bag with my macbook and textbooks. glancing in the mirror once more, i hear a honk outside followed by annie impatiently yelling my name. i quickly turn my speaker off and rush into the kitchen, snatching my apartment keys off the counter and walking out the door.

~

as i stumble down a few steps and almost drop my bag on the concrete, i finally reach annie's car. i pull open the passenger door and hear bodies by dominic fike blaring. i get in and throw my stuff in the backseat as annie quickly turns the volume down and turns to face me.

"you're not gonna believe what happened this morning." grinning from ear to ear, annie turns back to face the road and puts the car in drive.

"ooh what is it? has mr bryan finally retired?", i reply with a giggle.

"better."

"better? no way."

annie giggles too and continues driving.

"well? tell me!", i say.

"there's a new boy. and he is definitely your type."

i roll my eyes sarcastically and look away from her. she says my name and i look back at her with half-fake annoyance plastered on my face.

"annie, you know i don't want anything to do with guys right now after what happened with the last one."

"just pleaseeee trust me on this, y/n! seriously, he's so hot."

"that's what you said last time! and the time before that!", i smile at her effort to hook me up with this mystery-boy.

"no this one's different! he's cute, and funny, and genuinely smart. he's studying filmmaking!", annie says in an attempt at being convincing.

"ok ok, what's his name then?". i try to hide my slight intrigue when she mentions film making; i was originally going to study filmmaking but chose literature instead as i felt i had more of a passion for writing.

"matthew - well, matt. i don't think anyone really calls him matthew. i mean, besides his triplet brothers when they make fun of him.", annie giggles.

"triplet brothers?"

~

before reaching our university, we drove for another 15 minutes listening to music and talking about this 'matt' boy - who i was slowly getting more and more excited to meet..

note ⋆｡˚

sorry this chapter is suuuper short, chapters 2-5 have already been written and are way longer- this one’s just kind of an intro to the series!

this is the first fic i’ve written since like 2020 so hopefully it’s not too terrible, trust it will be getting a lot better !! :)

[ghostofasecretary]

[placeholder, to be filled with more goals later] list

Monday plots:

- (Mon) call that one guy and see if you can become a New Patient (i hate everything) (i don't WANNA) (i do want reliable access to meds 2k25 so. UGH. FINE. GOD) (find office phone number, that's step number 1)

- (Mon) update finances spreadsheet

- (Mon) write cards MONDAY? correspondence, something like "Dear [Name], Happy New Year! I hope you had a peaceful and restful holiday season, and I hope 2025 brings you exciting opportunities and joy. All best, Ghost" is fine

- (Mon) walk cards to post office; also check in re: the fucking "locker" (9400 140 2023 71 001 476 469) (got follow up step for later)

- (Mon) rinse off, shampoo hair

- okay. well. The Guy does not exist (or at least i could not find them) so i'm back to finding a new guy. have a list. gotta decide if i want a psych or pcp; if i trusted the pcp i could theoretically knock out my pap smear with them but this would require me to trust the pcp, so. that seems. unlikely. i trust psychs more than normal doctors for whatever reason. so maybe go with the psychs? but also my last visit with my pcp was March so i WILL run out of refills from that guy in the next three months and DO need a pcp. uuuuuuuuugh. let's...call that pcp office and check c 1pm. next available isn't till mid July! try another guy

- (Mon) make pumpkin bread to share with fremb

- (Mon) sort out Polluted Yarn

- (Mon) hang with J Monday afternoon (2ish) <- solidify plans, send text (done Sat night, Sun morning)

- (Mon) get that jump ring measurement to J for 3d printing so you can fix that cami

- (Mon) what am i gonna make Monday to eat Tues/maybe Wends for work lunch. tofu curry! yum! nice

- (Mon) eat leftover dal + broccoli

- do limited amount of lesson planning. like. more than zero not more than two

- nutrition spreadsheet

food:

- (1/13? 1/14?) use up last two bananas

- make pumpkin seed granola to give yourself more snacky foods

- (try granola bars with dates????)

- (Sun 19) wash blue shirt

(Sun 19) wash clothes:

- (Sun 19) wash misc clothing

- (Sun 19) wash gold sweater

- (Sun 19) wash another sweater

med quest:

- call hospital pharmacies re: med availability

- see about dental etc care here

- call lgbt friendly pcp providers

""Ghost's academic life:""

- poetry (1) type edits to t1, 2) type edits to t2, 3) type draft of M, 4) work on M and/or R (1/10/25), 5) do new smooth English translation (your fav song, that one) + send, 6) set + confirm meeting time)

- new poems! yay!!

- uh. class on Friday??? fuck my lifeeeeeeeeee (or let me rework my priorities)

- i really need to like. do a general Arabic grammar review

- and get back into Anki for Persian

mending:

- coral house skirt mending

- pj pant hem maintenance (coral hole, grey hem)

- preventative-ish darning/reinforcement of every canvas bag you own

- (Sun 19) repair main slip

- hem blue pants so you can actually wear them

- sew strap covers onto green dress

dreams:

- haircut nice for Ghost brain good of long Ghost neck

- could i grow herbs in my room? cilantro (and maybe mint, if controllable, which. it's mint) would be ideal

(Sat 18) plant green onion sprouts

- any free performances in my area? try to go See More Live Art

- give yourself more knitting time

list items 1/2/24 in blue

outfits 2024

outfit spreadsheet?? meh

meal plan for Being Cheap

free grocery store

make list of food banks to explore

1/7/25 list leftovers in purple

"contact" "people" for your ""career""

sort papers for real and not just for fake

make a scarf for A with the other yarn?

bonus Arabic reading practice (prolly not gonna happen)

list items 1/12/25 in black

done list (min. 1 day ago):

- (Fri) change sheets + wash sheets & apron

- (Sat) game with friends

- (Sat) 2025 Calendar

- (Sat) start yogurt making (finish tomorrow (Sun) 7:45am)

- (Sat) roast squash seeds

- (Sat) make banana bread with 3/5 bananas

- (Sat) turn mint skein into a yarn ball

- (Sat) call M

- (Sat) refill meds for the week

- (Sun) job paperwork

- (Sun) request anticonvulsants from doc

- (Sun) clean toilet, bathtub

- (Sun) attempt once again to destain/deep clean bathroom walls and floor boards

- (Sun) repair coat pockets

- (Sun) repair coat lining hem

- (Sun) groceries (stay under $30! thoughts: i would love peanuts and dried apricots but. strugglier items for budget, so select produce (+ milk?) first. sweet potato!! more broccoli/leafy greens. carrots and onions in bags if available. tomatoes, obvs. good on ginger for the next week. could buy an onion bag to cut up + freeze some extras for future use, which could save on future bills. also remember food pantries Are An Option To Explore) (well. got apricots and peanuts AND paper towels which took me over $30 but once my roommates pay me back for their share it should only be over by, like, 4 cents)

- (Sun) help roommate out a minimal amount. or for. two hours, of course i took two hours, fuck me

- (Sun) TIMECARD

- (Sun) MAINTENANCE REQUEST FOR BEEPING. GAH. text housemate for advice (Sat) it's on the rent portal, cool, you can do this

- (Sun) CANCEL OBGYN APPT (call tomorrow even tho closed b/c insurance bs)

- (Sun) make tofu + broccoli with peanut sauce. or spiced broccoli + tofu curry? need to use broccoli first and also eat spinach soon. or just cook broccoli! fine!

- (Sun) see what MS texted (re: med advice?)

- (Sun) ask group chat for rubbing alcohol/hairspray/acetone to try on coral skirt marker stains!! (also J + A) (can you borrow from someone)

- (Sun) wash another slip

- (Sun) leisure items: knit, drink tea, finish Jenny Nicholson video, new Cult Flav, check out some cookbooks to browse

[lilahaze]

"south bermuda shore"

07/01 5:55PM raffia platform sandals

07/02 9:46PM do parking tickets go on your record?

07/03 12:15AM infected stick and poke

07/03 12:20AM invisible ink

07/03 12:21AM are tattoos self harm?

07/04 10:23PM melted vs shadow root

07/04 10:37PM salon near me platinum touch ups

07/04 11:39PM why do my friends keep ghosting me?

07/05 8:40PM will border patrol confiscate psychedelics?

07/05 8:48PM heroic dose of psilocybin mushrooms

07/06 4:00AM abused to abuser pipeline

07/06 4:09AM irresistible urges

07/07 11:06AM is type one diabetes a visible or invisible disability?

07/07 11:12AM is it normal that my parents never advocated for me outside of the endocrinology office?

07/07 11:27AM how to leave the classroom -- early childhood education

07/07 11:29AM visual field intrusion

07/07 11:45AM the disability narrative

07/08 5:50AM addict definition

07/08 5:52AM how much does insulin cost around the world?

07/09 1:10PM how to know when to stop writing

07/09 1:18PM how to know when to stop editing

07/09 1:26PM how to know when to stop rewriting

07/09 1:37PM how to know when to stop drinking

07/10 8:40PM lemonade vodka alternatives

07/11 3:00PM everything you might miss starting over

07/11 3:12PM autonomy definition

07/12 6:32PM erotica

07/13 6:05AM ENG360 attendance policy

07/13 6:13AM what the fuck happened august 31st?

07/14 2:34AM amazon wishlist

07/14 2:41AM statement jackets

07/14 2:56AM scotch tape

07/15 4:23PM verizon international phone plans

07/15 4:34PM tjmaxx luggage tags

07/15 4:38PM how to change my phone number

07/15 4:42PM social security card equivalents

07/15 4:58PM can you overnight ship a passport?

07/16 7:10AM do i like him or the attention?

07/16 7:15AM should i take back someone who ghosted me?

07/16 7:18AM i have no idea how to tell if someone is genuine

07/18 4:02AM glycolic acid

07/18 4:11AM how to fade scars from when you got a little too sad at thirteen

07/19 6:44PM i'm into violence

07/20 8:12AM am i a lesbian or bisexual quiz

07/20 9:01AM compulsory heterosexuality

07/21 1:02AM airport lost and found

07/21 1:14AM the many lives of lilahaze

07/21 1:23AM when should i expect the tabloids to reach me?

07/21 1:46AM i think they'll write worse of me than i do myself

07/22 1:18AM one-way ticket to south bermuda

[lovecanbesostrange]

ouattober2023 Day 3: Fav Story Arc

I have enjoyed this show for the most part, even including S7. I think the switch to half-season arcs was good to keep it all fresh and not drag out things for too long. S4 being split into Frozen and Heroes & Villains was fun. But there just is no question. The arc I care about most, that I go back to rewatching for funsies, that I have the most (positive) feelings about (and some concerns/criticism) - Season 1: The Original Curse. The intertwined storytelling of everything that led to Storybrooke springing into existence and how Emma gets to know the town, breaking the curse as she was meant to do.

Unlike other arcs this is far broader, I have to acknowledge that. The 22 episodes of S1 allow for far more sidetracking. And later some details get revealed to prop it up (for this I'm thinking about stuff like Welcome to Storybrooke, a long overdue look at what it was like for Regina before).

Personally I still go so far to say, that the first season of Once Upon a Time is simply A+ tv. I absolutely recommend this to anybody who wants to have some fantasy-romance-family-fun. Well, okay, so S1 has some very, very dark moments (Graham's death for example).

They won me over with a thing I didn't expect - the Snowing romance. I'm sorry, but a lot of tv is as sophisticated as the Avril Lavigne song goes "he was a boy, she was a girl". Bang, there, that's it, that's the couple. (And I do believe even this show got super lazy with this.) But here we have Snow White and Prince Charming. Yes, of course they are a couple. They need to be. We all know that. True Love! True Love's Kiss! This is the kind of given couple I do not expect to be shown any type of friendship formed. Or an explanation why they think of the other. It just is. But they give us episode 3 Snow Falls and I am so in. Because yes, okay Snow being a bandit and a badass with a bow, totally capable of fighting and taking no nonsense - definitely checks some boxes for me. But Charming is also fun and smitten with her and I can see why they care. She uses the powder to save him. And they both have other things in their life, they can't spend time with this random person - and then they live rent free in each other's head. I believe in the stupid "I will always find you" concept. It is used again and again and still it's always sweet, throughout the show.

If you watch only the Storybrooke parts it seems so old and tired how the nice mousy lady fell in love with a coma patient, making things up about him in her head probably. And then he's married, she gets called a tramp and omg this cheating storyline. But with the fairytale underneath? Knowing they are in fact very actually cursed? This is their punishment and it is supposed to be terrible and hurt? WONDERFUL! David can't just leave Katherine, the curse won't allow for that. There is no easy solution, this has to be painful. We get something like 7:15am and at the end of the episode Mary Margaret and David try so desperately not to see each other, they are both in the diner at 7:45am. ROMANCE!! I am just rarely sold so solid on the main couple, okay? So this was special to me and I indeed looked forward to the episodes to see how their (EF) romance played out. And omg Heart of Darkness is such a banger of an episode. Evil!Snow is the scariest person on this show. He didn'f take an arrow for her, he took an arrow from her.

Exploring Storybrooke is also fun for the viewer. Henry believes things are weird, Emma has rational explanations, we know the truth. It's a wonderful and quirky set-up. Small town filled with weirdness. With so many episodes there was time to put in Hänsel & Gretel for the non-Disney fairytale feel. Great. We had time to get to know Leroy aka Grumpy aka Dreamy (I always laugh when he and Mary Margaret go door to door with the candles) with his own ep (still think as a whole the seven dwarves didn't get enough recognition). You can look left and right and wonder what's everybody's deal is. The town feeling is so important. People with jobs doing stuff. It's something that is a bit lost in later seasons with the focus on the core group, who are all related to each other. I'm sure Archie was a very busy man in the background dealing with everybody else...

It's also amazing to rewatch those first episodes and be reminded that it takes a long, long while until the Evil Queen's motivation is explained. Daniel who? To see Snow as a girl blabber out Regina's secret to Cora - SHOCKING! To understand that these two could have been friends, ohohohoho. It's clear that Rumple plays a huge part in the whole Dark Curse thing, but I think S2 gets more meaty with him. Yet his presence alone and all the deals he keeps making add a lot of flavor.

The worldbuilding is slow, but in this the out-of-order presentation does work, because S1 is actually well planned. (Yes, OUaT is a show that suffers a bit from later additions and expanding lore, but the original promise doesn't collapse under the weight.) The nice parallel structure makes the episodes interesting and moves everything forward at a comfortable pace. They also know how to throw a curveball. Oh, this town is hidden and no stranger ever walks up? Well, yes, hallo here is this guy on a motorcycle nobody has ever met before and he knows things. And for quite a few episodes August is just there, a well planted mystery box.

In the midst of everything magical suddenly we have the episodes Red-Handed, Heart of Darkness and Hat Trick following each other. A werewolf tearing bodies into pieces (yes, thanks, spilled blood looks best on fresh white snow), a whole murder investigation and aforementioned gonna-kill-Regina-now-Snow, and oh yeah that moment where you start wondering if Emma and Mary Margaret will be killed by a psycho axe murderer and the Mad Hatter might be a slasher now... yep. this show can be a bit dark and S1 knew how to walk that line.

And one last round of applause for the fact that the Storybrooke side of the story works with almost no magic at all. Yes, Regina has a bit in her backpocket, but she's scary enough without it. Her scenes with Gold are so worth a watch. He still knows how to scheme.

Oh, and let me mention something I appreciate a lot. The show starts with Prince Charming waking up Snow White with a kiss. Fairytale! We see the happy ending first. Thrown right into it (without knowing the whole ordeal they went through to get to this point). And then we near the end of the season, ep 21 An Apple Red as Blood. Which is a great episode to me, because I love seeing Snow and her band of misfits storming the castle (group effort, we deserved more of that). This is where we finally see Snow biting that apple, fateful. Hey, it's a Sleeping Curse, cool. She did so willingly though. It was her sacrifice for the promise Charming would be save. Not even trickery (okay, maybe we need to talk about this thing with "it need to be taken willingly to work"). This is such a great bowtie to the whole thing.

This here is what it is all about:

[laceyeb]

Let me tell you about my day...

It's barely 2PM, but it has been an adventure. It started when I woke up 12 HOURS AGO at 2AM. Because I have all week off work, I decided it was worth it to set my alarm for 2:45AM to tune into the Eras Tour in Sydney and watch the surprise songs because I just know they're going to be amazing this weekend. But I woke up early and then couldn't fall back asleep. I checked where she was at in the setlist and adjusted my alarm accordingly to get a bit more sleep, but I was wide awake. Surprise songs ended at 3:50, so what time do you think I finally fell back asleep? If you said 5:45AM, you would be right. I don't know why I thought I would be able to go right back to sleep as if I've never met me before. It was absolutely a mistake, but I will be doing it all weekend and I do not care.

So as a result of this, I stayed in bed longer than I planned this morning and skipped my walk. I had plans to go to the local zoo this morning, but I was going to put it off until tomorrow since I was so tired. (As if I won't be even more tired tomorrow.) I also thought about going for my walk anyways and getting to the zoo later. However, I decided I would go first thing for when they opened like I had planned. For some reason I decided that I needed to look nice for my trip to the zoo. I wore my cutest outfit and put on some makeup and spent way too long trying to get my hair looking decent. I thought, "Why am I looking so cute for the zoo? I'm not going to see anyone know. Like I'm going to run into my work crush by the flamingos?!"

Tangent: My school district has some sort of like day camp type program this week since we're out of school. It's intended for younger students and some people (primarily like classroom aides, playground monitors, etc.) work during this time for extra pay. I don't know anything about this program and forgot it even existed, but evidently it does. Do you see where this is going? End tangent.

So I get to the zoo this morning just a few minutes after they open, looking extra cute. I'm waiting in line for a couple minutes at the entrance and I look in toward the first exhibit and WHO DO I SEE?! I thought, "Certainly not. There is absolutely no chance. Clearly I'm sleep deprived." But then I saw another employee from my district and a small group of young kids and I realized it must be her!

I could not even believe it. What are the odds?! So I kind of watched their group and they're taking the same path I do, but moving slow because they have a guide with them. I give them enough time to get ahead of me and then continue on. I'm wandering around a bit and see that they're now up on this skywalk attraction. (Bridges up in the trees. Very cool and the whole reason for going to the zoo.) As I casually glance up there, I see someone else from work waving to me. And then I see another person from work at the skywalk entrance and I said hi to him and asked what they were all doing there and that's when I realized it was the day camp thing. So I follow the group up the skywalk from a considerable distance and as I get close, I see they're stopped because their guide is explaining things to the kids. I will have no choice but to catch up to them. And then I hear someone call my name. (Let me tell you. It made me feel some type of way to hear her call me by my first name since she obviously only uses my last name at work.) So I catch up to her and the group and I said something like, "Did you guys plan a party and forget to invite me?" And we both kind of laughed and then I continued on my way. That was the entire interaction, but it made the whole trip worth it. And now we have something to talk about when I see her at work and I will absolutely be mentioning that I go to the zoo all the time and see where things go from there.

[mrrightandmrbubble]

Hi, Kirri! I'm from South America and I'm trying to do a research about australian high school. I would like you to clarify some questions I have about school subjects, like: which ones are optional and which are mandatory? also, if you could send me some reliable websites than i can look up. every website i see says something different, can be very confusing so I decided to ask a australian person. Thank you!!!!

Hi, hey, i've been summoned! Okay, i'll admit to you upfront, it's been a hot minute since I was in high school so my knowledge is partly from personal experience but also what is published online. The school structures and curriculum differs from state to state, so it's no wonder you had trouble finding clear answers. I'll try to explain simply:

Australian high schools run from years 7 to 12. (We actually have 13 school years in total including Kindergarten, or preparatory, which is not numbered.) Students can finish in year 10 if they choose not to complete their senior years and test for university entry. If a student finishes in year 10, they get a Record of School Achievement; if they finish senior studies, they get a certificate of education depending on which state they're in:

NSW - Higher School Certificate (HSC)

VIC - Victorian Certificate of Education (VCE)/Victorian Certificate of Applied Learning (VCAL)

QLD - Queensland Certificate of Education (QCE), Queensland Certificate of Individual Achievement (QCIA)

SA - South Australian Certificate of Education (SACE)

WA - West Australian Certificate of Education (WACE)

TAS - Tasmanian Certificate of Education (TCE)

ACT - Australian Capital Territory Senior Secondary Certificate (ACT SSC)

NT - Northern Territory Certificate of Education (NTCE)

The national curriculum has eight compulsory learning areas, which can be categorized into subjects:

Then there are a wide range of electives, which vary greatly depending on region, type of school (state-funded vs private/faith-based) etc. Students in years 9 and 10 typically choose three electives. Here is an example of electives available to a school in NSW.

In addition, many schools offer the opportunity to study a vocational (often trade-based) course in preparation for studies after high school, called TVET (TAFE-delivered Vocational Education and Training). Many of these course results in credits toward school outcomes. I guess you could say that TAFE to Australia is like community college to the US.

The school year is broken up into four 'terms', with dates varying between states (see links at end for a list). A typical school day goes from 8:45am to 3:00pm Monday to Friday, with breaks for recess and lunch between period. A 'period' = one class, which typically runs for 40 minutes.

Upon completing senior studies and final exams, students are given an ATAR (Australian Tertiary Admission Rank), which they can use to select and be admitted to university. In fact, senior exams have just begun so it's a good time to keep an eye on social media and see how current students are talking about the experience! 'ATAR Day' (when rankings are released) is on December 14, another time to take a look.

Australia also has specialist high schools, such as creative and performing arts schools, intensive English centres (for students with English as a second language), sports schools, and technology schools. All of these must teach the compulsory subjects, but offer the chance to specialize in these areas.

Websites where you can learn more about the Australian curriculum:

Australian Curriculum Version 9.0 Australian Schools Directory

Study Australia

ACARA (for statistics)

TVET

ATAR

Hopefully that will help you! I hope you don't mind that I posted this answer but I thought it might be useful to others as well. If you have any other questions, go ahead and ask and i'll do my best!

[aamethyst000]

Aug 17,23 3:33pm - feeling a shift

lately, I haven't felt like the old me, which should be a good thing but it feels weird. on the one hand, I feel like "fckn FINALLY! I can breathe!". then the next, I feel like grieving the old me, knowing that she tries so hard and never felt like she did enough accomplishments before graduating. as if that was my only deadline to hand in my "work". I know the old me wanted to ses this through the end, but she's had enough. I need to let her go. I need to lay her down to rest now. she deserves it after all this time ♡ I think that's why I felt the need to move out for so many years. it's because I know I gotta get out of these old habits and survival skills that helped me throughout my teen years. I don't need them anymore, I am safe and I am able to be my authentic self now ♡ I can breathe ♡

aug 23,23 12:45am - I FUCKING HAVE A CRUSH ON STRAIGHT GIRL GODDAMMIT! THE ONE THING I TRIED MY BEST ‼️A V O I D I N G ‼️ FROM BLOODY HAPPENING BUT NOOOOO!!! IT HAPPENED ANYWAY !! NO MATTER THE AMOUNT OF REMINDERS I GAVE MYSELF THAT SHE IS S T R A I G H T IS UN FUCKING REAL I STG—

1:25am - I've been thinking about this for MONTHS! dude,

I kinda thought it was just "hey you're cute" and asking her if it was okay that I sort of flirted a little bit, just playful. and I wanted to be clear with her about both of our interests and sexuality. and I heard her at least 3 more times saying she's straight to other people who asked. so of course, I thought that was all the proof I needed for me to be like "hey brain? heart? don't fckn play me, she's straight, she's said so multiple of times, get over yourself"

apparently not.

Aug 23,23 5:28pm - like, is it just envy? gender envy? or just wanting to get to know her as friends? who tf am I supposed to tell— hang on.

Aug 24,23 2:53pm - I really hope that this isn't a crush and it's just me wanting to get to know her more as F R I E N D S and not as anything more. I know for sure that she is straight. i know I am not her type. I cant think of anything else but I didn't want anything romantic with her! all I wanted was to be friends, best friends even. so wtf is going on with me? I even checked in with her if I made her uncomfortable if and when I flirted at her (wasn't with cause yknow, she's straight) and as far as I know, she was honest about me NOT making her uncomfortable. I'm still trying to hold back on the flirting.

anyway, since I turned 25. u have been feeling more and more different. I don't know how else to explain it other than I can literally feel a shift in myself. it's hurting but I am learning to let go old survival tactics and habits that I no longer need in my adulthood. anything from my childhood, I no longer need, anything from my teenage years, I no longer need anymore but the teenager bit is (noticeably) hurting me more, only because I genuinely thought I wouldn't grow up this fckn fast. I certainly didn't believe it when every other adult around me told me that years go by in a blink if an eye

now I do, but I am glad I got to enjoy being in the moment in grade 11 and 12 and then the one year in university. and I am going to continue to be in the moment right now ♡

[tonitonitoni--444]

April 26th, 12:45am

The feeling of loving who I am, but despising who I am, over and over again, such madness. Two weeks ago I just left a relationship in which I could tell I wasn't wanted. She said my "ups and downs" were too much. She stopped being affectionate and stopped trying everything, besides sex. All of that sent me into a downward spiral of self loathing and depression. I made many inquiries on how to get facial surgeries and learning to train my voice. Making myself somehow prettier than I am.

A few days after this downward spiral all I wanted to do was find a woman to talk to and maybe hookup with. Even now I am craving some type of humanity, someone who actually gives a fuck. So, 3 days ago I started talking to Aimee. Aimee was one of my many weaknesses, a tom-boyish woman who exuded strength and sex appeal. She lives in another state but still I kinda fell hardish even though all we did was talk to each other through voice snap messages. I felt so good every time we were talking. I should have looked facts in the face about the terrible cruel world I often find myself in.

This morning I got 0 messages from 'Aimee'. I figured "she's busy" I thought I would pull a baller move and send her a snap of me singing and playing one of her favorite songs and she'd be excited by it whenever she looked.

I spent all day waiting for a snap from Aimee. I figured she liked me. I got so crazy about the situation that I didn't do ANY of the stuff I wanted to do for myself today like dyeing my hair and doing beauty stuff. Eventually I fell asleep from waiting around.

When I wok up from my sleep I realized she sent me a snap and I was so happy. But what did I get? I got a video of her watching tv. She had nothing to say about me or my music. Like even if I didn't like a person like me I would have still said something to be a decent person. Even still, I gave her the benefit of the doubt. "Maybe she is tired" "maybe she didn't listen or see".

About an hour later to my surprise I see her on facebook posting shit like "where am I going to find my 'so and so' girlfriend " and other shit like that.

-Here's the shit fact about being a trans woman in today's society-

If you are like me and like women, too bad. Cis lesbians, especially the butch kind want vagina.🤷🏻‍♀️ who can blame them, right? Even I want vagina more than dick from trans girl.

Men will treat you as a prized piece of meat only as a booty call because now people are saying trans women are 'men' again so that makes men "gay" which I don't understand at all whatsoever.

Trans women treat you nicely but it's almost too close to home. And honestly alot of trans women just don't try enough. They don't look female to me 🤷🏻‍♀️ makes me wonder what I look to everyone else because to say that I am a man is complete bullshit because I know I'm definitely not.

I swear I was supposed to be born a woman. A year and 3 days before I was born my sister was born dead straight out of my mothers womb. That's the only reason I am here on this planet. If she was alive I wouldn't have been planned at all. Sometimes I am thoroughly convinced that was me who was supposed to be born.

Its just so unfair. Why was I born male with low Testosterone and fucked hormones? Why am I the way I am? I want to kill myself about how bad it gets sometimes. No one really wants or likes me because I am nothing but a trans woman to the world. My other accomplishments and skills mean nothing. So what am I to do? I hate the way people treat me because it makes me hate myself. I always feel stuck because of how the world treats me. Id rather die than prance around as a dude again. It's not right. If I was a man, id have all the love, the best pay, treated the best and with respect.

So I am left here with one hope in my life. Perhaps if I work on my outer-self I can become a pornstar of some sort. That's the only route that I can actually see myself happy.

Everything else wont work because of the simple fact that I am a "trans woman". Bottom of the bottom, and least respected.

[skinni-girls-eat-books]

Monday, April 14th, 2025!

7:26am: woke up feeling good :)

8:45am: fell back asleep and almost slept through my class lol but it's good 😅

10:06am: Good poop, having a vitamin water zero and protein yogurt (80 cal, 12g protein)

11:35am: Out of class, now I have free will, time to waste it lol jk

1:37pm: Did the dishes, the headshot and the phone call, and a shower! it's been a big morning. Going to leave in a few minutes for my mystery bag. Did not make the pasta and low-key I know I'm gonna be starving when I get back so I hope I don't binge! Surprise phone call messed me up lol

I want to do my laundry and my nails and go to the grocery store (walmart)

2:21pm: I just realized the body armor I got is not diet I didn't even realize they made body armors with calories oops 😅 120 cal

7:29pm: Took a nap from like 3:30-6?? Idek I stopped keeping track of time. Took another poop and I keep feeling like I'm starting my period but nothing is happening 🙃 I ate two chicken empanadas, two ham croquettes (?) a beef bun and half a cheese pastry. I have the other half, an apple turnover and a pecan bread thing leftover in the fridge for whenever. I ate the meaty things in the car on the way home and they were sooooo good omg and fresh and warm. I'm glad I didn't fridge -> reheat them bc they wouldn't have been as good. 10/10 and it was $5 :) estimating blindly 1k-1.2k cal

I'm at the laundromat actually doing my own laundry for once since it was not much. Plus I just want everything ready when I wake up tomorrow. Today was a productive-but-avoiding-school type of day 😅 Still want to do my nails and go to the store because if I don't then it will just annoy me tomorrow lol.

9:10pm: I accidentally sharted myself in the car ugh I don't even know why. No clue, I guess no more empanadas?? There was nothing wrong with them though so I'm super confused. Will my period just start already bc I am having cramps.

10:50pm: Did the Walmart trip lol today is a long day but I'm doing it!! Finally have protein powder and functional deodorant 💀

12:39am: lol why am I still awake. Anyway two eggs and protein yogurt for dinner (37g protein, 310 cal)

[seizure95]

3/30/25 - 2:45AM

The emotions are running rampant tonight. I'm stuck feeling as if I'm just not recognized for what I bring to the table these days. Hell, I just got put in a god damn magazine and people just don't seem to care. They don't care about the hours of music I thumb through just to find the right mix. They don't care that I'm painstakingly organizing music to bring the energy up or down at the right times. They only care about what's happening in the very moment they're living in.

I feel like the only things I do when I write is come on here and bitch. But you have to understand what an emotional outlet this gives me. especially when the American health care system doesn't give a fuck about your needs unless you can afford the care. It's a sad state we live in. I don't DJ for my own self gratitude, though it is a side effect of doing it for so long. I've really done soo much to work on myself this year and it feels like the universe has just been regurgitating it right back out at me. More to do, more "this is good, but you need to do it in this way", More "you haven't self-loathed enough today, have you tried hating yourself more?"

Over all, I'm Frustrated.

So what brought on all this ranting about nihilistic behavior? Let's back up. Tonight was I spun over at my regular gig at Tribe. Things were going well, new music, people dancing. Right up until the House computer crashed and killed the sound system. The past few months haven't been the best. People commenting negatively, taking criticisms to heart only to be told that it's not good enough. So when you finally feel like you've caught a good groove, only to have it taken away from you by pure coincidence. It feels like a challenge. What felt like a good start to the night was taken away fairly quickly and I haven't recovered.

What really kind of bothered me the most about tonight, given all these critiques, and all thats been asked of us as resident DJ's. It really messes with my head to hear things we've been told to avoid by owners and management. And the catch 22 is that it's stuff people want to hear. It keeps the floor. While it does its job to keep people on the dance floor. It's low hanging fruit in my personal opinion. It's the type of music you'd hear the same 20 broadway DJ's play at 20 separate bars. So when I'm keeping dance floors engaged while playing queer music and am only met with negative feed back. It just feels like a slap in the face. Now I don't want this to seem like I'm hating on the other DJ who was playing tonight. Cause he was doing what he needed to do to keep a dance floor. It's just not what a vibe is for a gay dance club.

Something else that kind of struck me tonight, One of the DJ's who is not a stranger to PLAY and the DJ Booth, (Also a Very close friend of mine) but not a full blown resident. Felt like they had to almost apologize for getting booked on Pride Saturday! I'm ABSOLUTELY ECSTATIC for them, they 100% Deserve the gig. I've also done the dance floor the past two years so I was fully expecting them to book someone else for it. I'm glad its them. They're going to Kill it!

To still look towards the positives, I'm 118 Days with no alcohol! I'll hit my 4 month mark on Wednesday. I feel great, and I feel like I'm processing emotions a bit more healthily! Now while this journey has been mostly raw dogged, with the exception of a night time garden gummy. There is still the urge to get a little twisted every now and again. For those who don't know the whole reason I quit was due to a mushroom trip. Psylocibin has done wonders for people in recovery, while I'm not a full blown Psychonaught, I am intrigued to the benefits it can bring to people. Cause it has taught me more about myself than I think I would've ever known without it. 10 Fold.

Part 2 on next post