#but it still drives me insane that i dont remember where this comes from

[shpadoinkle-day]

asking here too but if u have the original of this meme pls reply with it

I could've sworn I had it but unfortunately I can't find it and I've been going crazy all day 👍

[julilovesyou444]

hey baee that last fic u did was so good i literally loved it tysm it was so cute!! i have another request - could you write smth where the reader is the 5th member of the band and tom has lit been in love w her since they were kids, and it’s only when they’re like 16/17 that he finally accepts it and confesses to the reader?? like it’s so unlike him to be all soppy and stuff so he didn’t wanna accept his feelings and he’s like super nervous bc he doesn’t wanna like ruin the friendship or anything but ofc the reader likes him back 😋😋 THAT WAS SO LONG LMAO and super specific again but anyways tysm 💗💗💗

i know you ~ tom kaulitz

ty for requesting bb! I’m so happy you liked the last one!! hopefully this one is okay too! enjoy💗💗 if anyone wants, feel free to request

warnings: swearing, yelling, drinking, partying, kissing, thats it i think ??

a/n~ thank you for 100 followers!! I sound stupid saying that but seriously the support means so much to me, gustav req coming soon!! stay tuned and enjoy this little piece for now💟 also thank you for all the comments and messages, I LOVE YOU GUYS🫶

(okay but angry love confessions >>>)

sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes !!

~

“are we doing anything tonight?”, i asked, laying down on the tour bus’ couch. My legs were draped across bills, he had insisted. We had been on the schrei tour for about a month now. the change from regular life to tour life was insane. we were on the schrei tour, about a couple months or so in. We had a little trouble adjusting at first, we were all getting into a lot of arguments, but now we were fine. Bill and Tom still get into arguments a lot, though. Tom has been acting weirder than usual, and i kinda felt like most of this behavior was aimed at me. It felt like he was distant, and I couldn’t figure out why. I have had a crush on Tom for just about as long as I can remember, but I always pushed away those feelings because I loved our friendship too much, and I didn’t want to confess to him and for there to be a rift in between us. I knew for a fact he didn’t like me back. He had so many absolutely gorgeous fan girls who liked him, so there was no way he liked me. He was also kind of a player. That hurt a little at first, but just like the whole situation, I learned to live with it.

“Uhh, i dont think so. We could do something, though. I wouldn’t mind.”, Bill replied, typing something on his phone. The door to the bus opened, and Tom walked in. The smell of cigarettes followed him. We were waiting on Georg and Gustav to finish up the grocery shopping. I thought he was going to go sit down on his bed, but I was wrong. He was staring down at me.

“What?”, i asked.

“Sit up. I wanna sit on the couch too.”, he said flatly. I groaned and sat up for a second, my legs still over Bills. I looked back and saw that Tom was sat behind me, both of his arms resting on the top of the couch. I fell back onto his lap, my head resting on top of his legs. I felt him tense up under me. He raised his eyebrows at me in a judgy way and I rolled my eyes.

“Who said I’m allowing you to do that?”, he said in a bratty tone.

“Deal with it.”

“I guess I will because it doesn’t really seem like I have a choice.”, he huffed.

“Okay, I’m tired of your guys’ bickering, I’m going to go check on Gustav and Georg and see what is taking them so long. Hans is in the store too, I guess he got tired of sitting and driving all day. I’ll be back soon.”, Bill said, lifting my legs up and letting himself get up. Before either Tom or I could protest, he left.

The silence engulfed us. It felt awkward, and I hated it. I had known Tom since we were seven. He had always been a bit of an asshole, but he was nice too. Lately I had just been getting asshole Tom. He seemed somewhat normal with everyone else, except for me. I started to overthink. Did he find out I liked him? Was he uncomfortable around me now? Did he think I was weird?

“sorry for laying on you, I’ll get up.”, i quickly said as I began to sit up. Tom grabbed my shoulder and pushed me back down into his lap.

“No. You can stay. If you want.”, he said flatly.

“Oh… okay, yea.”

I looked up at him as he gazed back down at me. I couldn’t figure out what was going on with him. What had changed between us? When he was a kid, he would treat me just like he treated everyone else in the band.

“Is everything okay?”, i asked softly.

“What do you mean?”

I could tell he knew exactly what I meant.

“Oh, I don’t know, it’s stupid, nevermind.”, I looked away.

“No, tell me.”, he used his finger to direct my chin back toward him. His eyes were slightly narrowed.

“I don’t know, Tom, you just seem different, that’s all. I feel like you haven’t been yourself lately, but I’m probably just dumb and it’s all in my head.”

He didn’t say anything.

“I’m sorry.”, i immediately apologized in fear of making him angry.

“Why? You have no reason to be.”

Everything he did confused me.

“Okay, well, I just feel like you’ve been a little distant.”

“I haven’t been.”, he said. He sounded a little bit annoyed.

“Okay, sorry.”

“Will you stop saying sorry?”, he lashed out.

I froze. He usually never yelled at me. He knew I hated when people yelled at me. No matter what the situation was, if someone yelled at me, I would cry. He knew that. I sat up and he tried to get me to stay. I shrugged him off and stood up.

“Um, I think I’m gonna go take a nap in my bunk, I’m pretty tired.”, I mumbled.

“Just wait-“

“Leave it, Tom.”, i said quietly before walking away and over to my bunk. I heard Tom curse underneath his breath. I laid down, and about a minute after doing so, I heard everyone load back onto the bus.

“Okay, we have about two hours left in our drive to Dresden and then you guys can get checked into your hotel and do whatever you want for the rest of the day.”, Hans, our driver, announced. Everyone agreed.

“Where’s did she go?”, i heard Bill ask. He sounded confused.

“Her bed, she’s taking a nap.”, Tom replied.

“What did you do now?”, Bill teased.

“Fuck off.”, Tom said back.

“Calm down.”, Georg said.

“Can we just go?”, Tom yelled up to the front of the bus at Hans.

I felt the bus start to move. I got under the covers. I was still very in love with Tom, and the way he was acting towards me hurt me so much. I didn’t know what I did wrong. I missed the way things were. I silently cried for a minute, I felt so stupid. He shouldn’t have this kind of effect on me. I hated crying. I felt like a baby. I fell asleep within a few minutes, trying to forget about what was happening.

~

I felt the bus come to a sharp stop. I blinked my eyes open. I could hear Tom and Bill arguing. I couldn’t see them because I was in the back of the bus, but whatever they were talking about, sounded serious. I stood up and walked over to the cracked door. They couldn’t see me, and I could only see a sliver of them.

Bill was standing up, lecturing Tom about something.

“If you like her, why don’t you just tell her??? I don’t get it.”

“I don’t fucking like her, just fuck off.”, Tom spat back at him.

“Yes you do! It’s obvious! You have since, forever! We can all see that you do. We also all see you treat her like she’s nothing, don’t you think that hurts her?”

“It is kind of obvious.”, Gustav trailed off. They were probably talking about one of the many girls Tom was leading on. He always did this. It didn’t surprise me.

“Shut up, Gustav. And so what if I do like her? How is that any of your business? I’m not going to jeopardize the band or anything else for that matter for some silly crush.”

“It’s not a silly crush, Tom. You’re in love with her.”, Bill said. It was silent.

My stomach dropped. So that’s why he’s been acting all weird. He’s in love with another girl. I couldn’t listen anymore. I stepped out the door and stretched, acting like I heard nothing.

Everyone’s eyes darted to me.

“Good morning, everyone! We are here?”, i said as cheerfully as possible. I wanted to play it off like I was completely fine and like the boy I’ve been in love with since I was seven wasnt in love with some other girl I didn’t even know.

“You just woke up?”, Georg asked. Everyone looked a little worried.

“Yea! Your guys’ fucking yelling woke me up so I figured you were probably arguing over the set list, of course you were dicks are deciding without me so I wanted to come and help choose.”, I laughed. Acting skills, on point. The band looked relieved.

“Well, if that’s over then let’s go get settled into the hotel.”. I suggested. Everyone nodded.

Hans went into the hotel lobby and got us checked in while we unpacked all of our stuff onto caddys. He came back, handed us our keys and told us our floor and room numbers. Georg and Gustav shared a room, as well as Bill and Tom. I had a room to myself, it had always been that way.

We took our stuff inside and went up the elevators into our hotel rooms. I unpacked my stuff pretty quickly before going over to Bill’s room to try and make plans for tonight.

I knocked on their door. Tom cracked it open and squinted his eyes at me before opening it all the way. I pushed past him but he grabbed me and pulled me back.

I furrowed my brows at him and tried to continue walking, but he wouldn’t let me.

“Can you not be so stubborn and just hear me out?”, he said. I stopped trying to get out of his grasp and crossed my arms over my body. I widened my eyes and shook my head a little, giving him a cue to start talking.

“I didn’t mean to yell at you earlier. I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s with me lately, but you’re right, i havent really been myself.”

I sighed. I didn’t want him to feel bad, especially for loving another girl. It was rare that Tom genuinely liked someone, and I didn’t want to get in the way of that.

“I know why, Tom. Its okay, I understand now. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable or something. I wont get so close to you anymore.”

He looked so confused.

“Wait what? What do you mean ‘uncomfortable’? And I never said I didn’t want you close to me? What are you talking about?”

“Tom, I know you. You’re like my bestfriend, its okay. You don’t have to keep secrets from me. And im not gonna be upset if you don’t want me to be as touchy and stuff with you. I wouldn’t want to do anything to affect your relationship or whatever you are deciding to call it.”

“What are you talking about?”, he asked. He was acting so shocked. Then Bill walked out of the bathroom. Since he clearly wasn’t comfortable with telling me about the girl he was in love with, I wasn’t going to push, so I changed the subject.

“Bill!”

“Oh, hi!”, he smiled, noticing me.

“I was thinking, what if we went to a club tonight?”

“OH MY GOSH, YES!!! please! I need to party, I’ve been so drained from always doing shows, that would be just what I need. you’d come too, right, Tom?”, Bill asked.

“Yea, I guess.”, Tom nonchalantly replied. He acted as if he was too good for that stuff.

“Go tell Georg and Gustav.”, Bill instructed.

“Why do I have to? Why can’t you?”, Tom complained.

“Because you know I take the longest to get ready! It’s getting late already so I’d like to leave sooner than later.”

“Ugh, fine.”, Tom said, rolling his eyes before leaving the room.

“What’s his deal?”, i asked.

Bill hesistated.

“Uhh, i dont know, he’s been weird. Tom will get over it soon though, don’t worry.”

“Oh, okay… it doesn’t have anything to do with me, right?”, i asked, trying to slyly investigate.

I saw Bill physically get taken aback.

“Uhhhhh no! No, I don’t think so. Why do you ask?”

“Uh i just feel like he’s been acting weird towards me I guess. We used to like jokingly flirt and be pretty close but we don’t ever really do that anymore and it feels kind of weird, but I think I know why.”

“Oh… and why is that?”

“He’s in love with somebody. I don’t know who, but it’s probably one of the girls he’s slept with. I think Tom just feels weird with me being how I used to be like with him because he is in love with her, y’know what I mean?”

“Wait-wait, where did you get this from?”, Bills mouth was agape.

“Don’t be mad but I heard you guys arguing on the bus. I heard only part of it. I don’t know why I didn’t say anything, but obviously the rest of the guys know and Tom is refusing to tell me too. He doesn’t know I already know, but I don’t really understand what is stopping him from telling me.”

“Oh… I see.”, Bill said, contemplating his next words.

“I think he will tell you when he’s ready, I think he just wants you to approve of him and he thinks highly of you. I also think you make him a little nervous.”, he finally added.

“Me? Make Tom nervous? Funny, but no way.”, I laughed. Bill made a face and shrugged.

“Okay, I’m gonna go get ready, I’ll see you in like 45.”, I said, turning for the door.

“Wait!”

“Hm?”

“I have a question, answer honestly, please.”

“What is it Bill?”

“Do you have feelings for Tom?”

I could feel myself immediately get flustered and my cheeks start to get red. Fuck fuck fuck.

“What?”, i laughed awkwardly.

“Please, I’m your bestfriend, you can tell me if you do.”

“Why do you even think that? Tom is my best friend just like you are.”

“You aren’t denying it.”

“Bill, please.”

“Do you?”, he asked again.

I gave him pleading eyes, asking him to leave it alone.

“Bill…”

“You can tell me anything. I wouldn’t judge you at all.”, he placed his hands on my shoulders.

I sighed again. Even if I said I didn’t, I knew Bill wouldn’t believe me.

“Maybe?”, i scrunched my face up a bit.

Bill smiled.

“Why are you so happy?”, i asked, unclear on whatever was going on in his head.

“No reason…”

“Please, Bill. Don’t say anything to Tom. I don’t want to ruin our friendship, he means too much to me. And I don’t want to get in the way of his relationship with this girl.”

Bill smiled at me again. He shook his head.

“I promise I won’t. And if I were you, I wouldn’t worry about another girl.”

“I thought he loves her though?”

“Just dont worry about it, go get ready!! And look hot! Not that you don’t already, but go get more hot!”, he said pushing me to the door, a smile permanently engraved on his face.

“Bill- wait Bill-“I stuttered as he pushed me out the door.

“Hm?”

“Please, I’m serious. Don’t say anything.”

“I won’t. Boyscouts honor.”, he held two fingers in the air before slamming the door in my face. I was greeted by Tom leaning against the wall. I flinched, I hadn’t seen him because he was standing behind the open door. His arms were crossed over his chest.

“Jesus, fuck! You scared me.”, i yelled.

“Don’t say anything about what? What were you guys talking about?”

“Nothing.”

“I hate when you keep secrets from me.”

“You’re one to talk.”, i replied, defensively.

“What? Was it about me? Are you embarrassed or something?”, he took a step closer to me, his face now adorned with a smug grin. I scoffed.

“Get over yourself, Tom. The world doesn’t revolve around you.”

“Maybe not, but sometimes I begin to think you do.”, he teased.

I rolled my eyes and turned around to go to my hotel.

“Be ready soon!”, he called after me as i slammed the door.

~

Bill banged on my door, for the third time in the last five minutes.

“HURRY UPPPPP”, he groaned. I finished zipping up my shoe before opening the door. Bill looked annoyed but as soon as he saw me, his face lit up.

“Oh. My. God.”, he said, looking me up and down.

“You like?”, i asked, already knowing the answer. I was wearing a denim mini skirt that was way too short, a black lacy top that had long belle sleeves with a pretty cleavagey v-neck. It was cropped perfectly to display my belly button ring. I of course had a ton of jewellry on too, with a bit of makeup as well. I wore platform black boots that went up part of my calf. They were leather and I had been gifted them, but I rarely got the chance to wear them.

“Obviously!”, bill exclaimed.

I walked out to see the rest of the band waiting in the hallway. They all looked a little shocked when they saw my outfit. I usually didn’t dress-up too much, mainly because I didn’t have the confidence to do so. I decided to just let go and have fun tonight.

I walked past them and they just stood there. I clicked the button for the elevator and looked back at them down the hallway.

“Are you guys coming or…?”

They scurried down the hallway and got into the lift with me. We decided to go to a club that was only two blocks away. It was a pretty popular club, and we usually got into most clubs that we tried to because of our status in Germany. The bouncer recognized us and let us skip the line. Perks of being semi-famous I guess.

The music was so loud I could barely hear my own thoughts. Bill grabbed my hand to pull me away and get drinks. I turned away and grabbed Tom’s hand, dragging him along with us. At first he just let me hold his hand, but then he held it back, letting Bill and I lead him through the crowd of drunk people.

Bill ordered us all shots. Tom watched as i downed mine, and drank his not long after. Bill snaked his arm around my waist and pulled me away to the dance floor. We danced for a little before some random girl took it upon herself to steal him away. I couldn’t really blame her though. I danced by myself for a little but got bored and decided I wanted another drink. I made my way over to the bar and ordered a drink I saw another girl have. I began to drink it slowly, looking around. I made eye contact with a guy. He was by himself, looking me up and down. He smiled and i smiled back. He had to be at least 22. He approached me and asked if he could buy me a drink, despite me not even being close to the one i just got myself. I told him that if he wanted to, he had to dance with me first. He agreed, and we went over to crowd of dancing bodies.

At first, it started pretty innocent. Just giggling, drinking, and dancing. He started to get touchy, putting his hands on my waist. He had them slowly go from my waist, downwards. I would pull away whenever he got to close to the one thing he wanted, but no matter how many times I pulled away, he would always try to do it again. I looked over and was met with Tom’s eyes. They were staring at me, a sort of gross look on his face. Was he really that disgusted by me?

“can I get you that drink now?”, he winked. I internally cringed but said yes. Free drinks? Fine by me. He ordered me something, but nothing for himself. As soon as the drink was in my hand, he was urging and pressuring me to drink if. I did. Another drink, same deal. I downed the drink, wanting him to just leave me alone about it. Even though I told him not to, he ordered another drink. I tried to push it away, but he kept pushing it towards me. Finally, he put the drink down. I tried to back up, but he pulled me into a sloppy kiss that I wanted no part of. I tried to push him off but he was too strong, or maybe I was just to tipsy.

“get off of me.”

“please, stop”

but he wouldn’t.

“I don’t want this-“, i started, yet another plea for him to stop. a pair of hands yanked me back. before i could even see who it was, I saw Tom step in front of me and push that guy into the bar counter.

“She told you to get off her you fucking pervert. Is getting girls drunk enough so they hook up with you your only hobby. Pathetic.”, he spat. The guy looked like he wanted to say something back, or fight Tom, but he just cursed under his breath and stumbled away. I felt embarrassed. I shouldn’t have let myself get in that situation.

“Thank you.”, i mumbled to Tom. He shook his head.

“Just stop. You’re really fucking stupid sometimes y’know? Putting yourself in dumb situations like that.”, he rolled his eyes as he walked away. I wasn’t going to let him be that rude and just walk away, so I followed him. I watched as he weaved through people. I followed hom, but not to closely. I saw him open a door and go in before practically slamming it. It was too loud for anyone to even notice. I waited a minute before going into the door as well. There were a few flight of stairs. I climbed up them. I had finally made it to the top. I opened the door. The roof.

The cold air hit my face as I stepped out, the smell of cigarette smoke filling my senses. I saw Tom, standing towards the edge of the building, smoking as he looked out at the city. I began to walk over to him. The gravel crunched underneath my boots, making him turn around.

“What the fuck is your problem to me? You’ve been such a dick and I haven’t even done anything. I just want for things to be normal.”, i said, angered.

“They aren’t normal.”, he said, taking a puff of his cig.

“And how is that in any way my fault? I haven’t done anything to you, yet you are treating me like shit. You loving some girl doesn’t mean you can act like that, it doesn’t have anything to do with me.”

“It has EVERYTHING to do with you!”, he shouted.

“What the fuck did I do?! I don’t understand what I did to make you despise me so much! Why do you hate me so much?!”, I yelled back.

“I don’t hate you, I’m in love with you, you fucking idiot!”, he yelled. His eyes widened at his own words.

I was so confused. It didn’t feel real. I could barely comprehend what he had just said.

“What?”, was all I could manage to say. He looked so nervous, his hands shaking.

“I’m fucking in love with you, okay?? I have been ever since I’ve known you. I’ve tried to push it away, I’ve always denied it, but i cant anymore. I’ve tried everything and I can’t! I’ve slept with countless girls but the only thing I’ve ever been able to think about is you. You’re always on my mind and no matter what I do, I can’t seem to get you out of my head. I’ve been being mean to try and distance you from me and make myself stop loving you but it’s fucking torture and it’s stupid and it hasn’t even worked in the slightest. Bill told me you heard us on the bus, it wasn’t some girl, we were talking about you. Its you, and it always has been. I feel sick when I see you with other guys, I get so jealous I can barely handle it. All I’ve ever wanted is you, and not having you is killing me. I’m sick and tired of pretending like I don’t love you because I do! Hate is the last thing on this earth that I feel about you. I love you so fucking much, and I’m sorry for treating you the way I have been.”, he yelled.

I could hardly believe anything I was hearing. Tom Kaulitz? In love with me? This is a prank, right? It felt like a dream.

“Are you serious?”, i asked.

“Really? After that long ass rant or about loving you, you don’t believe me?”, he dryly laughed.

“Tom, im serious, please…”

“Yes, I’ve never been more sure on something in my entire life.”

“Why now? Why haven’t you said anything?”, I asked, still unsure.

“I wanted to, but I didn’t know how to. We would flirt, but you always took it as a joke. I wasn’t joking. I loved you so much as a friend too, I was scared that if I told you, I would lose you. i also hate talking about my feelings and shit, i feel so stupid whenever I do.”

Part of me was still processing everything. Boy I had been in love with forever, loved me back. In the exact same way I loved him, he loved me. I couldn’t hold back anymore.

“fuck it, i love you too. I’ve been in love with you since we were like eight, and I never said anything because I thought I had no chance with you and I didn’t want to make things weird. The only thing I wanted was for you to stay my friend and for you to like me. When you started acting like you didn’t, I felt horrible and I felt like there was no hope for anything for us. I acted like I didn’t feel anything for you because all I’ve ever wanted is for you to be happy. Even if it meant you being with someone else. I love you, Tom.”, I rambled.

He closed the distance between us. He placed his hands on each side of my jaw, his thumbs slowly caressing my cheeks. I could feel myself get goosebumps, staring up into his dark eyes.

“you were going to let me be with someone else so I could be happy? even if it meant you weren’t?”, he softly asked. I nodded.

“what did I ever do to deserve someone so sweet liek you?”, he murmured. His eyes glanced down at my lips. He took one of his thumbs and pulled it across my bottom lip, tugging down at it gently.

“God, you don’t even know how long I’ve wanted to kiss you.”

“How long?”

He laughed.

“Forever. I want to kiss you now more than ever.”

“Prove it.”

He chuckled at my boldness. Tom leaned in, our noses brushing against each other. I couldn’t stand the teasing anymore, I had waited too long. I dipped his face and pulled him down. Tom, smiling into the kiss at my neediness. It was so passionate, I could kiss his mmm forever. Our lips fit together like puzzle pieces. I pulled him in more, unsure if he was even able to get any closer than he already was. he tasted like Marlboro Reds and liquor. I loved it, I couldn’t get enough of him. One of his hands found its way down to my waist, while the other one tangled itself in my hair. He tugged ever so slightly, earning a soft groan from me. Tom smiled at this, getting the exact reaction he wanted. He pulled away, our foreheads resting against each other.

“fuck, you look so pretty. I wanted to tell you how good you looked earlier tonight but i was too scared.”, he mumbled. I smiled, the sweetness that I had missed was returning to Tom. I pulled him back into another kiss, the first one being incredibly addicting. Our tongues fought for dominance, of course he won.

The door to the roof swung open, startling both Tom and I. We attempted to pull away, but I before I could even see who it was, I heard Bill’s voice.

“I was looking for you guy- OH MY GOD.”, he said, a little shocked. his face quickly turned into a smile.

“What took you guys so long?”, he teased.

“Oh shut up.”, Tom laughed, his hand now around my waist.

“Well, I ordered us some more shots, so… c’mon. you guys can finish whatever this is later.”, he smiled, waking back into the building.

“let’s go inside.”, i said.

Tom kissed me again, this time with the full intent of being sweet and gentle.

“it feels weird to say out loud now, but I love you.”, he said into my ear. I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. I looked back up to him, seeing the very boy that i fell in love with all those years ago.

“I love you, too.”

~

a/n #2 ~ THIS WAS SO LONG IM SORRY. also sorry for this taking so long the first one I wrote DELETED😕 I’m on vacation right now but I hope you guys enjoyed this long ass story.

[aliwritex]

I’VE GOT MY EYE ON YOU e.m

summary: girly, cheerleader henderson!reader loses her virginity to eddie.

warnings: virginity loss, penetrative sex, oral, drug use (weed)

wc: 2.8k

Eddie was completely obsessed with you. And who could blame him, you were always parading around in your little cheerleader outfit and the bow at the top of your ponytail, it was driving him insane. It all started after summer, when Dustin started high school and entered hellfire. Your paths had never really crossed before but ever since you came into the room where he held the campaign, already yelling at your brother for making you wait, he could not atop thinking about you.

After some time, just watching you on the hallways and teasing when you stopped by to tell dustin you were leaving, he asked you to come watch his band play.

"'ll think about it, Munson." you teased, getting in your car and driving out, leaving him standing in the middle of the parking lot.

The next day, when you purposely dropped by to talk to your brother, he demanded an answer.

"Or what?" you dared. "'m still thinking about it, okay?"

And again the next day, and the day after that and the rest of the week, and still no answer. Till it was the day of the especial concert and he drove to your place to pick you up but it was Dustin the one who opened the door. "Is your sister home, henderson?"

"What do you want with my sister, dude? I told you she doesn't like you"

"Well, we actually have a date tonight, so... Go tell her I'm here." he said pushing your brother back into the house.

As Dustin was making his way to your room you noticed the open front door.

"DUSTIN! Did you seriously just leave the front door wide open?" you yelled from the kitchen before making your way to the porch "What the hell are you doing here?"

"We have a date, remember? Why are you in your pjs?"

"Well, Edward, it's" you grabbed his wrist and turned to you, checking the time on his watch, "nine fifteen on a saturday, I planned on staying in and watching some tv"

"Why would you want to do that? Look, the show starts at nine thirty so you still have time to get ready, and," he reached into the pocket of his vest pulling out a well folded piece of fabric "I got you a shirt."

"Corroded Coffin?" you asked, looking at the shirt.

"Yeah, it's the band's name"

"Not convincing enough, sorry"

"C'mon, it's saturday and we have free weed. We can hang out and smoke something after the show."

"Fine! I'm gonna get dressed " you closed the door and made him wait outside as you changed into a jean miniskirt and the shirt he gave you. You pulled your hair up, combing the strands into your signature half pony before telling your mom you were going out. He drove you to the concert, there were about ten people at the bar , you and the workers included, but you could tell he was doing it for fun. After the thirty minute set you all got into his van and drove his friends home before parking on a random street. He invited you to the back, pulling out a blunt from his pocket and placing it between your lips to light it. after a while the van was foggy from all the smoke of the blunt you shared. Eddie started getting closer and within a couple of minutes you were on his lap, your hands on his neck and his on your hips, half blunt hanging loosely between his fingers. He put it away on the ashtray so he could take his hands up your back under your shirt. You didnt shake it off until his fingers started unhooking your bra. "Eddie, Eddie, no" you said trying to pull away from his kisses.

"Baby" he groaned in conplaint

"No, Eddie, we're high" you slid off his lap, tiding up your skirt.

"Sorry, I totally misread this"

"No, you didnt . I just dont want to lose my virginity in the back of a van, especially when we're both high." he huffed a laugh

"So cheerleaders are actually good girls, huh?"

"I wouln't say smoking weed in the back of eddie 'the freak's van is very good girl of me.

"you know what i meant" he leaned back in to kiss you but you turned away.

"I think we should go home"

"Yeah, right" he backed up, climbing onto the drivers seat and helping you to do the same.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Are you avoiding me?" he asks stoping you from going into your classroom

"Eddie" you groaned trying again to go through the door but his tall frame stopped you.

"C'mon babe, you're more mature than this. Talk to me please"

"What do you wanna hear, Munson?"

"Well, from you, a lot of things but i dint think thats appropriated"

"Eddie" you reprehend

"Sorry. But i really missed you this week, really, and not only because i couldn't stop thinking about currupting you"

"Too far"

"Again, sorry, just talk to me, give me a reason or an explanation , please why are you avoiding me"

"Well, Edward, we almost fucked in the back of your van, thats not exactly the girl i wanna be"

"And you're not! You are something, okay? I wanna go out with you again, just please say you’ll think about it, okay?”

“Sure, Eddie, I’ll think about it” you said and got on the tip of your toes to give him a kiss on the cheek, your hand on his chest to help you balance. “Just dont skip class today, okay?” you said as you pulled away, noticing the small grin on his face. “Now go, Ill meet you after Hellfire”

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“See you tomorrow” you checked the time on your watch as you walked out of the gym all the way to the other side of school to meet Eddie.

“You’re late”

“Yeah, sorry, practice took a little longer than usual tonight” you explained stepping into the almost empty room. Eddie was tiding up his stuff fron the table. “Where’s everyone”?

“They already left. Dustin said he was biking home. But i had to wait a little longer just in case you actually came”

“Well, here i am”

“I see that, and what do you wanna do?” he asked as you got closer and closer.

“Wanna kiss you, so bad”

“Do it”

His hand cupped your cheek, fingers curling at the hair on the nape of your neck. Your hands met his hair and his traveled down your sides, taking place on your hips. He walked you to his throne without separating your lips. You took place on his lap, legs layed out across his as you let his tongue into your mouth. After lazily making out for what felt like ages you couldnt take it anymore and straddled him.

"Sweetheart, what are you doing?" he groaned

"I want you," he shook his head no "Eddie, please"

"No, not here, you don't deserve this"

"Let's go somewhere else, my car, it doesn't matter"

"No, it does matter, if you didn't want it last week. C'mon, I'll drive you home, they're about to lock everything up. I promise i'll give you everything you want, just not now, okay?"

"Sure" you got off his lap and he picked up your backpack from the floor, taking your hand and walking you out all the way to your car. "What about your van?"

"I'll pick it up tomorrow, come on" You handed him the keys to your car and took your place on the passenger seat. Your ride home was quiet exept for you guiding him. As soon as you got home he handed you the keys and got out of the car.

"Do you want to come in, Mom's not home, it's okay if you do"

"Babe…”

"Eddie, please" you approached him in front of the car, hands wrapping around his waist as you got on the tip of your toes to whisper in his ear "I've been thinking about you all week too. You dont know how many times i came around my fingers whising they were yours. "

"you're gonna be the death of me" you giggled knowing you finally got what you wanted

"Come on" you pulled him to your porch, opening the door and getting him in your room before your brother saw him.

"Cute room, sweetheart" he noted as he looked around and you locked your door.

"Shut up" you slaped his arm playfully before trying ridiculously to reach his lips for a kiss.

"No, im serious, really like the dolls, they're not creepy at all"

"Eddie!" you groaned and he looked down at you "Just kiss me, please"

He picked you up so he didn’t have to bend down to kiss you, your legs wrapped around his waist as he sat on the edge of your bed. Eddie started working kisses on your neck as his hands snaked under your cheer shirt making their way up your back and unhooking your bra. Your breath started quickening as he did so going unnoticed by him till he looked up from your neck.

“You okay?” he inspected you making sure you were comfortable and you nodded. “Do you want me to take this off? You don’t have to.”

“I want to, Eddie. Fuck, stop asking, just want you to make me feel good.”

“Okay, darling, okay” he said pulling your hair down from the pony, his hands running through the sandy strands. he lifted your shirt over your head and pulled it off your arms along with your white bra. Eddie laid you out on your bed, turning his body to hover yours. “God, you’re beautiful.”

He pressed his face to your chest, his hair tickling you as he wrapped his plump lips around your nipple. His hands made their way below your waist, one of them palming you through your underwear, feeling you get wetter and wetter as his mouth worked on your breasts.

“Please, Eddie.” you whine.

“What do you want, sweetheart?” he hummed against your skin.

“Just you, this is not enough. Please touch me”

“So whiny” he remarked before taking his skilled fingers to the back of your skirt to unzip it. You lifted your hips to help him pull it down your legs. “but so pretty” he said as his eyes met your white panties and kissed the pink bow right on the band. His fingers hooked on the side of your underwear looking up at you to make sure before pulling it down your legs. He spread your legs kneeling up between them to take off his jacket and use your hair tie to put his hair in a bun.

“Eddie, can you take off your shirt, please? Feeling a little exposed here.” you asked as you kicked off your shoes.

He laughed and took it off noticing the way your eyes fixed on his chest tattoo. “Like them?” he teased as he took off his belt, making you blush. “Im gonna eat you out now, okay? Tell me if you want me to stop.” he explained laying between your legs. You nodded, watching him kiss up your thighs and throwing them over his shoulders. Before getting to where you needed him the most he skipped his kisses, taking them to your stomach.

“Edward, touch me” you begged for what felt like the thousandth time.

“I will, baby” he said, taking off thd ring he wore on his right hand and putting it on your thumb. “Is this what you want?” the tip of his finger teased your hole. “So wet” he said before attaching his lips to your clit and sucking on it.

Your hands went straight to his hair pulling at the strands and making him groan against you. His tongue explored you as his middle finger finally penetrated you fully, he curls it up to locate himself before starting to thrust slowly into you. He eased another finger in as he came up, kissing your chest and neck.

“You’re gonna pull out all my hair if you keep going like that, sweetheart”

“Fuck, sorry, i didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“It’s okay baby, i don’t mind the pain.” he chuckled before diving back into you, his fingers now curling upwards as his lips get back to sucking on your clit. You suddenly felt empty as he switched positions, his tongue now fucking you as his thumb worked your clit with much agility.

“Kiss me, Eddie” you mumbled and he quickly came up, his plump lips meeting yours. “Fuck, gonna cum” you groaned as soon as he took his kisses to your jaw and neck. He penetrated you again, thumb still working on your sensitive nub. You bit his shoulder as you came, clenching around his fingers.

You tried to catch your breath as he worked you through the orgasm, fingers curling inside you slowly. “Fuck, Eddie”

“Felt good, baby?” he asked as he pulled his soaked fingers out of you, taking them to his mouth to clean them up.

“So good, fuck, want more.”

“In a second, baby” he knelt back up and pulled a condom from his back pocket. “You wanna touch it?” he teased after he caught you looking at the bulge formed in his jeans. You nodded and sat up, right hand reaching to undo his buttons as Eddie looked down at you, opening the package. You looked back up at him when you got to his blue boxers, not knowing what to do.

“Here, darling” he pulled his dick out of them and slid the condom down on the length before taking your hand in his and wrapping around it. You started pumping slowly with help of the lube from the condom and watched it adjust perfectly on his cock. He got up from the bed, his cock escaping your fist so he could take off his pants completely, not wasting anytime before climbing back over you.

“You okay?” he whispered against your neck, lips brushing your skin softly as you nodded. “Ready?”

“For fucks sake, Edward, just do it” you mumbled just wanting to be filled up again. Eddie lifted up his hips slightly looking down to align him self to you and finally pushed the tip in. You naturally gasped from the new sensation, making him stop, thinking he hurt you. “Eddie its fine, keep going. If i want you to stop i’ll tell you.” he nodded, pushing little by little until he bottomed out into you.

“Fuck, baby, you feel so warm.” he groaned as he waited for your green light.

“Move” you finally said and he waisted no time. His hips started grinding into yours, always checking to see if you were alright. “Eddie, I can take it, dont worry.”

And in a couple of seconds, his hips were snapping into yours. All that could come out of your mouth were embarrassing groans and whines, adding a blush to your already reddened skin. You could feel his hands grabbing your thighs, fingers still covered in his own saliva, as his lips covered your neck in kisses, almost making you up. “Did you stretch?” he asked with a smirk on his face, you just nodded knowing exactly what he was about to do with that hand he had behind your knee. He threw one of your legs over his shoulder, making you let out a sound your not proud of. It was so explicitly erotic that you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Whats so funny, huh?”

“Nothing, just” you were interrupted by his thrusting, “fuck. Eddie, shit”

He covered your lips with his when he realized you were being too loud, your left leg completely folding over your own body. His hips were mercilessly slapping against yours as he kissed you harshly, all the fear of accidentally hurting you gone out the window but you really didn’t mind. All you wanted was to feel full of him and feel him slamming into you. He was unstoppable, completely out of his mind, he couldn’t think straight, not when he was that deep into your pussy.

“Eddie, baby, so close” he groaned in response, feeling your walls clench around him.

He was so pussy drunk his fingers could barely make their way to your clit to help you with your release. But as close as you were all it took was some lazy and uncoordinated fingers to make you cum. You bit his shoulder as you did, afraid you might be too loud in your most pleasurable state.

“Fuck, baby” he moaned, all the different reactions he was giving your body being too much. the clenching around his cock, the nails on his back and the bite on his shoulder just taking him over the edge. “Shit, so good, so warm” he mumbled as he emptied into the condom.

“No, no, no, not yet.” you stopped him when he tried to pull out of you. “Fuck, Edward, that was amazing.”

“Well, you’re welcome, princess” he hugged you after watching you blush at the pet name, flipping your body over his without disconnecting you. You laid your head on his chest enjoying the warmth of his body

[stevie-petey]

Decided to just send this in directly but! I have explanations for everything so buckle in bc when i say i have brain rot about this fic I MEAN IT ITS SO GOOD

1. BI BUG CONFIRMATION. ENOUGH SAID.

2. I will never forget reading that scene from season 1 of steve driving bug home w her bike in his trunk and her all flustered about it and i dont super remember what time of day it was in the scene but in my head it was right after sunset where the sun has set but its light creates this contrast that makes everything look cool toned in comparison to whats in the light n i wanted to play w that in the coloring also im a sucker for steve n his big arms so this was almost entirely self indulgent

3. The cardigan bc i needed to. I re read that chapter constantly it gives me all the warm n fuzzies and thats good for the soul

4. The phones were both an “i need to put this in here immediately bc my brain never stops thinking about it” and a filler for blank space. The colors for each are tied to what s3 bug and what s3 are associated w in my head like you cannot tell me bug isnt soft ivory coded and steve is not light grey-blue coded in s3 it just feels right for them (plus i needed to reference the nicknames at least once my very soul craved it)

5. Dustins hat was a lil bit of a last minute thing, i was working on a bigger piece w all of this kids n their looks for season 3 but it wasnt coming out the way i wanted it to so i scrapped it but i still wanted a something in there that wasnt steve or bug related and it felt fitting to put in dustins camp know where cap both bc of his relationships w steve n bug and bc every now and then i think about how dustin felt ditched by the party at the beginning and how heartbreaking that scene was when i read it n how much i just wanted to hug the lil guy bc feeling lonely at an age like that is so devastating it made my heart hurt for him so i wanted to have a lil thing for dustin in there somewhere

6. In the show i really liked the whole bit w steve asking girls out and robin keeping score n before you wrote this scene i was curious as to how you were going to go about it and it ended up cracking me up dude i love that scene if him just being awkward and so not “king steve” suave and i needed to put down how my brain saw that scene to something visual bc it was so ugh hes such a dork i love steves himbo self

7. Follow up is the lil doodle of steve n robin running around high as hell and there was no way i wasnt going to include that somehow if i am given the chance to write the phrase “trash popcorn” and draw robin frolicking i will take it with both hands and bolt

8. Going back to the whole “steve is a desaturated light blue in s3” thing i just wanted an excuse to draw my boy being cute in my head this is when hes helping bug put away books at her job and yes the anatomy is a lil wonky but i luv him and his hair swoops and joes side profile is so very fun to draw <3

Over all come home is wonderful n amazing and i love it n ur brain is so big n full of wrinkles

i genuinely cried when i first saw this im not kidding. im speechless, its so fucking beautiful and everything you drew from the fic is captured SO perfectly i cannot even begin to explain how much this means to me :(((( thank you so so so so much. truly.

the DETAILS ???? you brought the cardigan to life. its exactly how i envisioned it in my head, its BEAUTIFUL :((((( and bug being ivory and steve a blue ,,,, god you really truly nailed this i again cannot put into words how PHENOMENAL this is. the telephone lines being connected with their nicknames, steve carrying a box of books at bugs job, him driving and the setting sub (which you got EXACTLY. it was the same i envisioned in my head writing that scene), the bi colors on the lady bug like are u kidding me !!!! youre insane and i LOVE YOU !!!

steve n high robin doodle is so <333 and the steve scene at scoops with his flustered monologue in the background made me giggle so hard oh my god.

i know you dont know this, but my birthday is tomorrow and this is the best gift ive ever been given. i want to frame the doodles and put it on my bedroom wall because i am astounded and in awe of your talent and still so baffled my fic was brought to life !!!!! its mind boggling and i cannot thank you enough for this experience <333

(obviously with ur permission in reference to wanting to print n frame the doodles because theyre so dear to me and i respect ur talent !!)

[ryuryuryuyurboat]

RIRI. i SPECIFICALLY said no lyney angst. ever. for as long as your tumblr shall live. the little pookie wookie cutie sunshine munchkin muffin bear is in love with us returns our love do you understand😡 for legal reasons and so that i dont get judged hard by the people behind me on the train this is purely a joke. but you know WHAT ISNT A JOKE RIRI IT'S MY HEART SHATTERING. absolutely unbelievable. i demand compensation. fluff where lyney accepts confession. and an apology letter. 500 words. (hugs u)

i hate that i know EXACTLY who you are. what's with the hug did you burn the kitchen down again– anyway, here's my apology. love u!

last kiss

synopsis: if you go, can i go with you? if you leave me, can i leave me too?

genre: angst. no comfort.

characters: wanderer x gn! reader

warnings: established relationship, reader referred to in 2nd pov, written from wanderer's pov, mentions of wanderer’s birth name, reader gets amnesia, wanderer a little ooc maybe

a/n: i spent so long writing and re-writing this i will actually cry if people don't like this (no pressure though) mwah :3 likes, reblogs and comments highly appreciated!! it helps a lot :>

©2023 ryuryuryuyurboat. do not repost, translate, plagiarise, or modify in any way, shape or form.

masterlist

he remembers.

kunikuzushi remembers your first meeting, clear as day. the wonder in your irises as you reach out for his hand, the way you cupped his porcelain face in your hands, running your hands through his indigo locks. he remembers when he accidentally let his feelings slip, freezing up in fear of your reaction– he remembers your light laugh, leaning in to press a chaste kiss to his forehead. 

the balladeer remembers your disappointed look when he comes home to tell you he’s made his decision. you turn and go straight into the kitchen without another word, and the weight of silence has never been so heavy. and yet, as you set the table for dinner, you ask when the ship for snezhnaya will leave. he remembers all too well how you stopped right before boarding the ship, turned back to glare at him, and say your decision to follow him still didn’t mean you agreed with his. and when he fell from the shouki no kami after failing to replace lesser lord kusanali as sumeru’s god, he remembers you rushing forward to try and catch him in your arms to soften the impact.

the wanderer remembers those 2am walks to puspa café, pinkie linked with yours, because you craved some hot food and didn’t want it home-cooked. he remembers those cold nights with you– the rain’s symphony muffled in the background as you move in closer to embrace him tighter under the shared covers, him reluctantly humming you back to sleep. 

he remembers that time you got abducted by fatui agents– any mere mortal would have gone insane from their cruel treatment, and yet, you became the one driving your abductors nuts. he found you with your back facing him as you wield your sword, your chest heaving as you take deep breaths. he remembers how he couldn’t help but let a tear slip as he runs forward to hold you tight, murmuring apologies into the crook of your neck, all the while wondering where you got that much strength from. and he remembers the way you turned around to embrace him, a rare fire in your eyes as you told him those words he wishes he could have imprinted on his skin: “i’m your heart after all, aren’t i? i can’t just go dying on you when you’re not ready to go!”

the wanderer still remembers that promise you once made at 1:58am in the morning, that sweet moment you both shared, the moon being the only witness to your soft declaration of love.

the wanderer remembers that fateful day he found you unconscious in a withering zone, your body bruised and battered— presumably from fighting enemies. he’s grumbling all the way home with you in his arms about how clumsy and bothersome you are, even as he gently cleans your face from the dirt. he refuses to leave your bedside for a single second in fear that you might awake all alone. but he was the one left all alone.

he hates it.

he hates that he remembers.

and you don’t.

he hates seeing that blank stare you give him as you tell him you have no idea what he’s harping on about. he hates that even after months and months of trying, even with lesser lord kusanali’s advice, you still remember nothing. he especially hates that apologetic smile you gave him as you tell him you don’t love him back. because you did. once. and you made a promise never to leave his side as long as your heart beat. once. 

but you don’t remember, do you?

your explanation that you don’t want to continue leading him on because you just don’t feel the same completely shatters him. he has no right to force you to stay, either. not after everything you did for him. but he’s always been selfish, hasn’t he? so he asks you. he asks you for one last kiss so he can keep you in his fond memories. your eyes soften as you mutter an “oh, kuni.” (he insisted you stick to the name that always hung on your lips.) he tries not to show any emotion as you pull him into a tight hug, pressing your lips to his forehead. he tries to smile as he waves you goodbye, because he wants your last memory of him to be a good one. and he tries damn hard not to cry as he slides down the now-closed door of the house you once shared, head in his hands, knowing you’ve forgotten everything as easily as you breathed.

you’re his fourth betrayal. he hates that he has to remember that for the rest of his sorry, miserable life.

taglist: @i23kazu, @kazumist @oveloof (send ask to be added to taglist!)

if you liked this, do consider dropping me a follow for more :>

[jj-stay]

bathe in passion pt.6

Word count: 1K

Pairing: chan x stya{ stay /reader}

Genre: fluff

Rating: PG-16

Warnings: suggestive, hickies, scratches, reader can't walk, the cringiest convo ever, my worst writing of all time {sorry}, horrible writing style,

☪️ Master List ☪️

Chris woke up and saw the sun hit her face. he then recalled all they had done the night before and remembered it was her first time and that she had just lost her V card to him and he now felt bad for making her sleep with him in that way after she had asked for them to go back to sleep he felt horrible. he regretted forcing to do that instead of when she was ready on her own time. he felt that he should have listened to her and let her go back to sleep like she wanted to even if it caused him discomfort or he could have gone to the bathroom to try to knock one off. He loved her in every way possible and he felt absolutely horrible for doing this he felt as though he had hurt her as if doing this to her had disrespected her, her wishes, her belief, her body, everything.

he felt awful. he wanted to do nothing more than to make it up to her, but the marking that littered her skin looked like works of art. he looked at her neck all the way down to her cleavage, where the blanket had reached to cover the rest, all had been covered in bite marks and hickies and love marks. there was a big part of him that felt proud, then felt guilty for feeling that way after he had forced her to lose her V card to him. you woke up to see him looking at you with a sad guilty expression not able to be hidden at his weak excuse of a smile.

you thought he was regretting sleeping with you. was it because he realized that your chubby stomach was gross or he realized it wasn't as beautiful as he said

"hey baby, i am. so. sorry for making you do something you didn't wanna do i never should have forced you to lose your V card to me i should have waited for you to be ready and now i feel horrible and-"

"ok first off calm down"you said stopping him in his speedy rant

"secondly you didn't force me to do anything i agreed to it-"

"but" he replied.

"no buts"

"you didn't pressure me to do it either it was just what i needed otherwise i might have never been ready"

"if anything i should be sorry that im not good enough i bet all the stretch marks made you feel disgusted and my chubby belly made you regret sleeping with me and for that i am so very sorry"

"okay first of all, what on earth are you talking about your body is the most beautiful thing i have ever seen in my entire life you are amazing in every way and i am honored that you let me be your first time you were amazing im just a little disappointing not in you but in myself for leaving so many marks on your beautiful skin {doesn't have to be white skin i know some of you beautiful chocolate queens have been feeling left out dont be flaunt that chocolate color mama} but i also feel extremely proud i kinda want to do more and wish i did on every inch of your body"

"and if anything your stretch marks are tiger stripes"

"so beautiful and shows off how brave and fearless you are and your body your curves are everything to me the very things that drive me insane that makes me understand why guys will want to watch and stare but still wont stop me from being jealous a little "

"you are especially sexy when you wear outfits that show off all your curves "

"and if you still don't believe me on that wasn't the Greek goddess of beauty often seen to be thick with hip dips and if the goddess of beauty can see the beauty in you why cant i ? "

"that was the sweetest thing I've ever heard thank you my love" you said.

"no problem" he replied.

"lets go get breakfast"

gets up and gets dressed when he hears something loud coming from the bedroom and runs back in to see you on the floor. he took a moment to take you in the fact that you were littered in hickies and love bites all over your abdomen all over your breasts neck collar bone and thighs had bruises, hickies and bites.

{he was still shirtless had a couple hickies but they would have all been hidden by a T-shirt easily}

"you mind helping me out i cant walk "

"or stand for that matter" you stated.

he smirks and picks you up and takes you to the bath which he had already set for you.

"aww you already set me a bath, so nice"

"thought you might want a nice hot bath after last night ." he winks at you.

you blushed.

"oh, and sorry for the scratch marks on your back "

"What?" he rushes to the mirror turns around and sees those scratches would be easy to hide with the t-shirt as well.

"yeah its fine "

"i would say sorry for the hickies but we both know that I'm not." he says as he smirks. leaves the bathroom and goes to the kitchen still shirtless and started making breakfast for everyone and that's when it hit him.

everyone.

as in the guys.

the guys he shares a dorm with.

his group mates.

they were here.

and with how loud luna was he highly doubted there's a chance they didn't hear.

just as he thought that ALL the guy walked in all looking tired

"I hope it was worth it."

"you know keeping us up all night"

>:( jisung pouted.

chan turns around.

"Yeah, sorry, i forget you guys were here."

minho: "what ever judging by the scratch marks on your back im guessing you did good, so im proud of you "

chan blushed so hard "lino what the hell dude " extremely embarrassed

binnie: "haha he's so red right now"

"baby come get me pls im done bathing and i cant stand up to dry off" stya said.

chan was now red-er that hyunjin's hair in maniac

lixie: "wow"

"my bro took away her ability to walk"

"I'm impressed yet somehow not surprised you could"

chan: "LIXIE!!!!!!!"

seungmin: "hes not wrong though"

i.n: "hes not wrong though"

chan got so flustered but he just turned off the stove after he had finished cooking and went to help stya.

[semi-imaginary-place]

I liked death stranding overall. I have a weakness for these sort of auteur works where it's one person running the show. On one hand that mean the end result is a unified work, atmospherically, thematically, etc. (books are the og. No editor can completely erasure the depressed little weirdos that famous authors are.) And I personally really love that sort of consistency in a work. Which isn't to the opposite cant be good to. FFXIV for example is massively popular and you can tell there's 15 thousand cooks stirring the pot and each has their own ideas for stories which makes the game inconsistent it's a bunch of separate chunks all squished into one game. It makes the game disjoined as you can tell where one writer left off and another came of as the ways characters and plot lines are treated constantly change. Personally it drives me insane. But for auteur single creator works on the other hand because they are so dominated by one person they take on all the flaws and quirks of that creator and death stranding is an excellent example of that

Death stranding is weird. Kojimas sense of humor is weird. And I'm not even talking about how this game is amazon delivery norman reedus mpreg simulator like that man carried Lou 9 months to full term (Dont forget the piss mechanics). Kojima is baked into the very essence of the game. I remember one sidequest line vaguely about.. the mountaineer? And his wife and then you find out that she's the mountain climber so shouldn't it be the mountaineer and the mountaineer's husband.

You can tell Kojima wanted to direct a movie soo bad. Born to make movies forced to make videogames. I don't think i was the only one wondering if the game had multiple endings like when sam is deciding whether to shoot amelie or not. Speaking of that has to be the weirdest sibling relationship I have ever seen. Ignoring the reveal how amelie and Bridget are the same person. Has kojima never met siblings before?? Siblings dont act like that.

Oh yeah and the least american america ever. In terms of geography, sound design, and aesthetic that's iceland with an "america" label hastily slapped on top

Still I really liked Death Stranding I found the story to be emotionally compelling. The structure is fascinating with the different episodes but I all thought it worked really well to tell it's core narrative about fatherhood. The main antagonist being Sam's father and their relationship was one of the best parts of the work, there was a lot of genuine emotion there. And then Sam and Lou and how much gameplay is involved with litte little BB. Like I said I really liked the thematic cohesion everything is connected the strands and bridges, umbilical cord, and the network you spend the game physically connecting.

I never did get why every character was so invested in sam he's just some socially stunted recluse. Which did in the end play into the themes of connection as sam comes out of his shell a bit through the game. Like everyone really cared about Sam for little reason when he didn't really care back. Felt unrealistic but whatever it's a story. Although Sam did end up pretty important so

I should say I never played death stranding because because i dont like action games I watched several playthroughs. I don't really like any sort of time limited input game. "fast paced" "real time" are great ways to repel me from a game.

[fma03envy]

okay one more dr ask thing (dont feel obligated to answer if you dont want to BUT) Id really love to hear what you think about the big questions 20 and 42, its bit something Ive seen peoole discuss on tumblr at length recently

Had a few thoughts for the first one so putting them under the cut

20. What is your favorite aspect of Danganronpa?

This one's a bit hard to put into words but I'll try.

I love Danganronpa plotlines that kind of HAD to happen based on the context was built up, and characters who are doomed by some core aspect of their situation (either plot context or their own intrinsic character traits).

I think Nagito's a good example of this, because him being Like That is so tied to his talent on every level as well as to the setting of the killing game, but with context it feels like he couldn't have turned out any other way. His whole "this despair will lead to even greater hope" thing cannot be separated from the fact that his talent literally guarantees anything unlucky that happens to him to be reimbursed with something lucky. Everything in his life is so dialed up to 1000 that his only way of staying hopeful on a personal level is to believe that the cycle ends at the universe righting itself, a sentiment that the setting of the killing game makes the others see (correctly) as illogical but him cling to as salvation. He's the most extreme version of what Chiaki and Kamishiro describe where people get defined by their talents.

Dr3 Chiaki is another one of my absolute favorite examples, though in her case what gets me is more a matter of framing. You first see her and your immediate thought is "WAIT why is Chiaki here? There isn't any human Chiaki later-" and then after a second the dots connect™. But if you're anything like me, you still end up endeared by her, and so will find yourself hoping against hope that maybe she'll be ok. And so of course, she isn't, she was never going to be, she dies as horribly as possible, setup and payoff. Aside from all the junkozuru stuff, Chiaki's arc is easily my favorite part of dr3 because it takes advantage of its nature as a prequel and uses your own expectations to build dread.

Speaking of prequels, I feel like Danganronpa Zero (my favorite part of the Dr series thus far) also utilizes its chronological location well to build an air of inevitability. Like you know after this book comes The Literal Apocalypse, so the question isn't if or how everything will go to shit but when. And our protagonist's attitude of denial only heightens your unease, because she's so singlemindedly set on having a happy life with Matsuda and blocking everything else out that you can't help but assume that ultimately will become impossible (and of course in the back of your mind, the fact that neither of them is ever seen again later in the series nags at you). But then it turns out that Ryoko is doomed not only by the narrative but also by her base character premise. Her very existence was conditional and she was never going to win; Junko would never be able to find satisfaction chasing such dreams.

(Sidenote: I would also argue that Junko and Izuru are both intrinsically doomed by their own boredom tied to their ridiculously OP talents. This is why Junko devotes herself to insane schemes that will never be enough, and why Izuru's two choice coping mechanisms are a) give up or b) help her).

Plus on reread, not only does Ryoko's plight become more tragic, but Matsuda's whole thing feels a lot more predetermined, both because Junko had the whole thing literally planned from the beginning (which is foreshadowed in ways that drive me up the wall), and because it's like. All Matsuda's actions tie back to the combination of his classmates being murdered + his loyalty to Junko + his suspicions he's trying desperately to first ignore and then disprove that she's behind this + guilt over harboring her + guilt over Soshun + guilt over lashing out at Ryoko about this when she doesn't remember and LOVES him, guilt guilt guilt guilt. Of COURSE he's a confused, bitter contradictory mess, how would this character be anything else in this context.

So, the short answer would be that dr0 Mukuro's repeated "that's the kind of story this is" quote encompasses the ideal Danganronpa vibe (ik she only repeats that in one of the two dr0 fanstranslations I have on hand but I like the quote and so am hoping it's canon)

42. How do you feel about the Danganronpa fandom as a whole?

Eh, I feel like I'm not really the best person to ask here? My perception is skewed by the facts that a) I only really interact with dr fans on Tumblr (or insta but then it's mostly ppl who've followed me first) b) I'm very quick to block strangers if it seems like they're shitty or annoying and c) I've been into dr for less than a year. So I feel like I've been able to keep my own experiences relatively good bc of that?

Generally a lot of the weird bigotry I've seen here is people uncritically parroting the same stuff present in the games, but also I've been a fan of media with far fewer issues where the fandom really wasn't much better (see: utdr. Trying to find letsplayers who I didn't hate was just as hard there as here; currently I've got like 2 channels I trust to be normal about dr but that's it). So basically no good fandoms only good friends

[finitevoid]

to begin: im sorry for kinning edelgard and im sorry about your wrist “What about micaiah” Ive thought about her and i didnt know what to say about sothe so i just didnt. my mind immediately jumps to sothe being in middle school and then i lose my shit and stop thinking about micaiah. they are the same age? But ….. the vibes…..? Maybe theyre just sou//wen (From irl lore)

What i did establish is that micaiah is also in the group home with stefan and soren its like a literal final fantasy house in there. micaiah gets limited contact with them because Girl (foster care 1984) but generally stefan is fond of her and soren tolerates her more than in canon because he grew up with her and shes not lighting his troops on fire. She still gets on his nerves because she’ll just start psychoanalyzing him out of nowhere and he hates that but its kind of a greil mercenaries type environment for him where this is kind of his family but its Not ike

branded group homes are pretty common because either youre bigoted against the branded or you dont want the load of trauma that comes from fostering/adopting a branded child. Most adopted branded were charity case infants from countries where theyre especially marginalized (please save the branded children from gallia. THere is nothing loaded about our perception of laguz countrys persecution of minority groups and lack of insight into our own). the yank branded children in the states of crimea are kind of ickier and get adopted less. foreign or not once they hit age 6 in the system they are demon children no one wants to adopt. Notably a good chunk of the branded population is foreign born because of this + asylum seekers. Even if they get adopted 7 times out of 10 its kind of a fail adoption story (maybe beorc savior complex religious people adopting foreign branded children dont always have the best interests of the child in mind and are prone to fostering superstitious beliefs about the children they adopted). ps Soren and micaiah were taken from daein and cant run for president now :(. soren was an infant but micaiah is proudly a daeinite (yet another reason for people not to trust her) Yes they were all in iep connections together where micaiah a couple of times per year off her meds would poke sorens legs with sharp scissors. Otherwise she was usually chill

also...... post the rest of the videos in the pictures channel?

my wrist does that its ok . and dont be sorry about that. Im glad you kin a woman i think thats progressive #girlboss #vriska

did she make soren bleed with the sharp scissors or was she just being a little silly. either way soren probably wants her dead for that. i like that in this au he gets to grow up around other branded people i dont think it made him more normal or anything but its something. The three of them are like the branded crew and thats their social niche it actually sounds like hell on earth

i think sothe being just younger enough than her that (if? when?) they start dating everyones like Um.... but cant say anything is really funny. but also. micaiah voice Sothe give me your hand... theyre so much bigger than they used to be(they are the Same age). is also funny. either way they are insane. sou//wen from irl lore indeed. sothe leaves for a week to go on a vacation with his parents and micaiah cries

i dont have anything to add to your detailed worldbuilding regarding the displacement of foreign branded children in crimea due to anti branded sentiment and then being seen as charity cases that beorc parents take in to feed their savior complexes until they get old enough its impossible to forget that they are people and then they live in group homes until adulthood. Yeah. Thats deep thank you

also i just did i made a google drive with all of the videos bexause i dont remember which ones i posted lo l

[weirdmageddon]

the tone in these tags is driving me insane. i don’t know if you miscommunicated your intent here, but regardless of the intent what you said really hurt me!

i already give myself too much social self-doubt and guilt. i do NOT need to hear it from others. these tags are insensitive, unnecessary, and unsolicited.

why are you getting the impression that i think of myself as “superior”? when i say “above” i clearly mean the depths to which i’ve learned it and the firsthand experience. “superior” or “arrogant” are frankly the LAST thing i feel myself as, not to mention want to be seen as!!! i can’t help feeling compelled by and passionate by what i’m interested in, and what i like i collect a LOT of information about and i become very knowledgeable in it. i WANT communion with other people. i want to share in the joy. i just cant feel safe doing that and sharing my knowledge BECAUSE people like YOU think my attitude is “superior”. it’s fucking not! these things are my natural interests that i am just drawn to!! i’m interested in things people would probably consider esoteric or unapproachable like jung and socionics to figure things out about myself, to understand why i am drawn to certain things, and share what i have realized. but because theyre kind of niche it’s very hard to find people to talk about and i feel like im seeing everything from a very global perspective where i can change the view of that perspective to find new nuggets of insight into the world and human nature through my impressions. but i don’t want to be condescended or talked down to like this when i simply communicate what is going on with me.

of course what i’m feeling is hurting me. do you think i’m not aware of that? you think i’m stupid? that’s WHY i’m communicating it, because it’s the only solution that makes sense. my solution isn’t “going into another room”, what the hell! again, last thing i need!

that came off to me as an underhanded insult to suppress me for expressing my own passions. my solution/goal is to feel safe enough around others to fill the room with my OWN feelings and my OWN knowledge and people who are interested and understand my perspective will stay. i just don’t want to cause inconvenience to others, i want to respect them. but what you said came off to me as extremely disrespectful and as if you want me to erase my presence, like i’ve already been fucking doing myself, when what i’m trying to do is trying to assert my own presence. i don’t owe you an ounce of it now, and even if you backtrack your statements now i’m still going to be suspicious because those tags came off to me as being actually sanctimonious. like one of those people who looks at you pitifully and tells you to go to therapy or something. and since i now know you are capable of being like this, i don’t feel comfortable with you.

the reason i posted that was just updating people about where my head space has been. why i haven’t felt comfortable opening up. this is because i want to be sure i can feel safe being myself and expressing my reality, which comes to me through nonjudgmental observation and thoughtful reflection, around other people.

i expressed a similar idea to my friend about overcoming my social fears of creating a space for myself and my thoughts about a week ago (i feel safe to share these things with her.)

ME: and i was trying to relate my issue with that to the patterns in my social life. and i think it is afraid of being seen.

ME: because i check every one of these boxes.

HER: Remember when you were talking about how you felt like a naked animal hiding

ME: yeah

ME: and the fear of being seen applies even to my interests

ME: not because of the interests themselves but the fear of the perversion of people’s relationships towards that thing by association

ME: i want to limit peoples exposure to my interests if i dont know them because i want to protect them, and protect the field around myself and my interest. it’s why i dont share my favorite bands with everyone because i worry what will happen to them with tiktok being a threat and ruining it for me — being associated against my will with whatever they consider cringe when i am just doing my own thing

ME: i am afraid of the way people feel about me and perceive me as a result of my own interests against my will

ME: which is why i seem to unconsciously seek out things more untouched and more obscure that call me or resonate with me.. it gives me more of a sense of existing in peace and harmony in my relationship to the interest and, at bottom, my own existence. places where i feel welcome and i don’t have to fight for my life

ME: i find that the more obscure or hidden, the more welcoming or “clean” i find a space. like the air is fresh to breathe around it. i want to exist with it and live in communion with it, the places where i can fully be myself and express my thoughts and feelings. it is more harmonious because there’s less, like... it’s more of an understanding through action, less through words kinda feeling, you know what i mean.

ME: but doing that also makes me more original and unconventional, by chance

ME: and less people around me who can relate to and harmonize with me

HER: Control of outside perception. I get it. I was super super neurotic about this

ME: YES 😭

ME: and at the same time

ME: i dont like the idea of being gatekeepy because i do want to rejoice and share but it has to be with people i trust with it to understand it on my emotional level without twisting and bastardizing it

ME: and thats why i think these lyrics by panda bear (ESE) resonate with me so hard. they make me feel so heard in a very nuanced way that i dont think is captured in many cases

ME: except it’s like, i’m the one thats doing all of what hes proposing already, quietly, instinctively

ME: without even needing to think about it

and that is why jungian analysis and the unconscious shadow and my deep knowledge of socionics provides an endless loop of fascination for me i want to share it but im unsure how it will be taken. this insight was discovered with the help of these things, reinforcing their helpfulness for me. knowing people like you are out there is what’s getting in my way. thanks for making it that much harder.

like seriously you could all do it too if you chose to slow down, look inwards and discover how things affect you. everybody can! this is something that should be accessible to everyone, not just me. i just think about things extremelty deeply. i think people, and society, would actually be a lot more well off if people learned to be more self-aware and reflective. i want to share my life, not keep it inside myself. that’s what creates the isolation. but of course when i open up about it in a vulnerable way to test the waters i get shit like this.

don’t you see how the more i share my mind and my reflections, my own reality that i’m vulnerable opening up about because of things that are beyond my control, the more you know about me that you didn’t know before? does this show you a different picture? did you realize you erroneously misjudged my intentions? i just posted this post right before this one that people need to stop being so fucking judgmental. god those tags tipped me over the edge because they are the encapsulation of every wrong superficial perception from the outside about who i actually am that makes me hesitant to share myself. it pissed me the fuck off.

i’m not going anywhere! just like everyone else i deserve a place in the world where me and my insight i want to communicate from what i’ve learned can feel wanted.

another jung quote since he is a banger factory:

“No matter how isolated you are and how lonely you feel, if you do the work consciously and conscientiously, unknown friends will come and seek you.”

^ this is what i know is going to help me. it’s just a matter of doing it without social rejection.

To orient a bit more by what this person means by "you already know that part". It's what you know you need to do. You know it in your gut. It changes over time. But you usually have a sense of some element of personal "work" that you need to do, that you might want to avoid. Sometimes it involves something simple like having that conversation. Sometimes it involves something bigger like quitting drinking. That's why Jungians instruct you to look within, not outside yourself for your answers. You know what you need to do. Looking outside ourselves is often us looking for a "way out" of doing "the work".

i didnt have any evidence as to what has been cumulatively bothering me (because i was avoiding expressing anything that could allow me to receive rejection in the first place) because a lot of it was past traumatic social experiences but this just. catapulted me to spill it. so i guess i could also thank you being so inflammatory towards my emotional state and saying all the wrong things to me?

i understand how your advice might work for someone else but this isn’t what i need because it does not apply to me, and it felt very insulting considering it’s what i have been struggling with already. posting this was testing the waters and making contact about what i’ve been doing recently and why i have been feeling more distant which i want to fix.

i’m glad i asserted myself here actually. i feel like i just gained a level in … i don’t know. something. i just don’t like being an unpleasant person or needing to get worked up to constantly feel like i have to defend myself. it’s exhausting. i just want to feel welcome, appreciated, and zen.

i have been doing a lot of self-reflection. not because i did anything wrong but i want to find things that are true. but the more i don’t post because i get so long the more isolated i get because my knowledge is above the level of the people around me who havent done that kind of work and it feels hard to share my feelings in a fulfilling way

“Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible.” — Carl Jung

ive been been getting a lot more into jung. most of his work sincerely resonates with my own observations. he shares a type with me. this quote is all too pertinent

[blackvail22]

had the craziest dream last night (the night i wrote like the last two posts) and its the most insane one ive had in a rlly long time

i was at the gas station near my home and i was like looking around and then my enetire old group of friends were hanging out with my ex girlfriend (aka the girl that bullied b two school years ago that b is still friends with and makes things for when she literally contemplated suicide because of her)

anyways, we locked eyes and i started to get anxious. after that the gas station somehow transformed to a restaurant thing and then this fucking robot/internet scam thing as a human came in and i could tell was like... a scam robot or whatever but my mom didnt so when the robot wrote on the ticket my first and last name and then like scribbled at my name and then it locked eyes w me. terrifying. it was so--

ok anyway the robot thing wrote a like $1000 tip or whatever but since it was a scam... they came after me after my mom took the ticket LMAO

before the robots came after me, i remember i was in a car in a parking lot in my town, and i thought of something i really wanted to share with you (apple) and so i called u and we talked for a while. i dont remember what we talked about? i just remember you being confused because we didnt voice call a lot before then LMAO

And then these fucking missles start flying at me. like, shit was gta style i swear to god. so ny dad starts driving the car, nd he's swerving everywhere to dodge the missles and then eventually (i dont know how it got to this) but suddenly i was back at my gas station but it was more like ... there were brick buildings everywhere, like it wasnt my town anymore. and then these christian protesters are parading down streets with these fire guns(?) and are screaming, telling everyone to praise the christian god or whatever

then people start shooting these guns from high buildings (its like a ball of fire that comes out) and so its just raining molten balls at this point. panicked, i go to dodge the fire thats coming down. theres this person with a sign that was yelling people to stop firing the guns, but they didnt hear and they kept going. then one of the fireballs hits someones leg (its an old classmate of mine) and then he's screaming in pain and his leg is burnt off

thats the last thing i remember if im being honest

another important thing to note i guess is that the parade of ppl in my dream were all wearing white shirts. idk if thats significant, but it was odd. there was also portions of my dream that were in black and white, nd there were parts where i saw all black but i was imagining something happening ... like it was daydreaming

yeah i really wanted to share that w someoje because it was traumatizing ngl

[princesuna]

you come out of suna’s bathroom after changing into your indoor clothes and his brain almost short circuits at the sight of you. you come out wearing a loose flannel that’s way too big for you with only one button closed in the middle with your sleeves rolled up and grey shorts. his face heats up a bit and doesn’t realize he’s staring until clap your hands in front of his face.

“oi rin! did my beauty turn you into stone?” you quip with a giggle.

“you wish. button up more or you’ll catch a cold,” he retorts.

“but it’s still summer! and i feel so comfortable right- hey!” you pout as suna stands in front of you closing most of the buttons on your shirt. when he’s satisfied with his work, he pulls you towards him by your shirt to give you a quick kiss.

“you��re gonna drive me insane. where did you get this shirt anyways? it’s so big even i could wear it,” he asks. 

suna thinks he knows what most of your clothes look like, but this seems to be a new piece to your collection. his mind shoots him with the intrusive thought that it was from another guy, but he quickly dismisses the thought because he has seen you in oversized clothing before. you have a huge green flannel in your closet similar to the one you’re wearing now. there’s no way this shirt could ever be from an ex or someone you’re cheating on him with.

right?

are you that bold to wear something like that around him? suna isn’t sure why he’s starting to doubt you. you both love each other very much. he feels very secure in this relationship, but for some reason, he can’t shake the possibility from his mind.

“i found it while i was shopping at forever 21. it was just randomly sitting on a rack and i thought it was totally my style so i bought it.” you reply.

you didn’t show any signs of hesitation while answering him and suna can tell when you’re lying. you’re so god awful at it he would spot it in the blink of an eye. he flushes the intrusive thought out until you speak up again.

“now that you mention it, this might fit you perfectly! try this on, i wanna see you in it,” you urge.

“ah i dont think it will fit, sweetheart. besides, this isn’t my style,” he objects.

“no! you’re trying it on right now. i’ll be right back,” you say and disappear into the bathroom again before he has the chance to argue back.

you come out in a t-shirt while holding the shirt in your hand. you push the shirt into suna’s arms and force him into the bathroom.

your boyfriend shakes his head at your shenanigans, but he is grateful because now is the perfect time for him to put the intrusive thought to rest. he puts the shirt on and when he’s buttoning it, he begins to feel uneasy. the way he buttons this shirt is exactly how he buttons his dress shirts for press conferences. suna examines the shirt closely and his suspicions are confirmed. this is a men’s shirt. the buttons are on the right. buttoned shirts for women are always on the left. he knows this fact because he had to wear his mom’s dress shirt for a high school banquet one time because he stained his the day before.

suna tries not to jump to conclusions because he trusts you. he didn’t sense any hint of deceptiveness in your reply to him. he tries to calm himself down before walking out of the room in the shirt.

“babe, you know this is a men’s shirt, right?” he asks stepping out of the room.

“really? how can you tell? i remember picking it up in the women’s section,” you questioned.

“for men’s shirts, buttons are on the right. buttons are on the left for women’s shirts,” your boyfriend explains.

“oh my god! so that’s why it felt so weird to button up the shirt! i thought maybe it was just a style thing. that makes much more sense!” you exclaim.

your reaction seems genuine and he feels bad for doubting you, even if it’s just for a second. you love him so much, how could you ever cheat on him?

“yeah. if i didn’t know any better i would’ve thought this came from another guy,” he joked. 

“rin, don’t tell me got jealous over a shirt.”

“i’m not!” he disputed, but his voice gave him away.

“sure, the high pitch tone in your voice is telling. did you really think this belonged to another guy? you’re so funny. i love you and only you,” you go over and stand on your tippy toes to give him a peck on his cheek.

“i just don’t wanna lose you to anyone,” he mumbled while pulling you into his arms.

you manage to catch what he said and smile. you admire every feature on his face while playing with his hair. you’re lucky to have him. then, a thought pops into your head.

“rin, how did you know the difference between the dress shirts?”

“i’m leaving,” he pulls away and vanishes into the bedroom.

“hey! come back!” you yell chasing after him.

you couldn’t waterboard that story out of him.

[theshelbyclan]

Off the Menu

Summary: You were bored to death with your life, your wealth and the bourgeoisie. Until one party, your friend Tommy Shelby inadvertently introduces you to the gangster Alfie Solomons

A/N: This seemed like the perfect request to post on Valentine’s Day! Anon requested: hiya love! could i please have a request for ma man Alfie?? you’re a young lady with some aristocratic background but you’re a bit of a sweet rebel since you are promised to some wealthy old old man but you dont want to go the same path as other ladies - you and tommy are great friends (its a secret) and by some accident you meet alfie who from the start is so soft for you which drives him a bit insane? (Because what the hell🧐)Thank you! Oh, how I’ve missed writing for Alfie!! Thank you so much for requesting sweet anon, and I hope you like it 😊😊

Words: 3478 *** You were standing by the mantlepiece, tongue practically hanging out, hoping to God someone would offer you a drink. Why were these formal parties always so fucking boring? All these tedious men talking about tedious subjects, and as a woman you were just expected to nod interestedly and smile when they made their terrible jokes. They were all the same. Thank God Tommy was here to brighten up the party a little bit.

“Lady Y/N,” he promptly appeared next to you and asked sarcastically, “having fun?”

“A blast,” you replied, without looking at him. Everyone in here knew you or your father or your brother. It was the curse of being born into the aristocracy. But none of them knew you and Tommy were friends. And they could never know.

“Why are you here?” you asked Tommy. “I know some people here. I have business with them. Car parts.” You rolled your eyes, “Business. You’re just the same as them, Tommy. Boring.” “Oh, I’m boring, eh?” Tommy smirked a little, “You didn’t think so when we were at that party in London.”

“You mean the party where you bribed that member of parliament and then stole his car?”

He quickly motioned, “Shush! And no, not that one, Y/N. I mean the one where you and me decided to get out of there and ended up at some nightclub in London. The Old Mill? Or were you really so drunk you can’t remember the entire fucking evening?”

“Not so loud!” you giggled now and for the first time, you looked at each other, eyes sparkling like little children. The two of you had known each other for a long time, accidently crossing paths, and you were one of the few women who had refused to sleep with the great Thomas Shelby. And somehow, he liked you even better for it. Now you were just friends, secretly, who sometimes behaved badly together.

He downed his drink and announced, “That’s the man I need,” and he pointed at yet another dull figure in a white tie, “I’ll see you after, yeah?” “Tommy, wait! I need some man to get me a fucking drink and you…” “I’ll come find you,” he called over his shoulder and walked away, “get some other poor sod to do it!”

And so here you were, back again where you started, still without a drink in your hand. You watched as everyone mingled and realized that you’d grown up with these people and had moved in these circles all your life, and still you didn’t care for any of it. It was all just show and pretense to you. It was predictable, fake, and most of all, boring.

“Alright, you’ll do,” you decided eventually, while you grabbed the nearest man at hand.

“Do what, love?” the stranger inquired, filled with curiosity. You looked at the hand you’d taken and noticed a small tattoo of a crown. Then you followed his arm up and noted to your delight that he wasn’t at all like the other guests that were invited. He was big, bearded, strangely attractive and his eyes literally shone.

“Hello,” you eventually said, after staring for a while. He took off his hat and tucked his cane under his arm. Then he bowed in a slight theatrical manner, saying, “At your service, Miss.” “It’s ‘lady Y/N’, actually.” “I apologize. Must be my heathen upbringing.” You smiled politely and asked, “At my service?” “Your words, love: “you’ll do”? Now, that’s what every fucking man wants to hear, I can tell you that, especially when it comes from a mouth as lovely as yours.” Was he flirting with you? Or was this just the way he talked? You couldn’t be sure, but you were definitely intrigued, “You’re very forward, mister…?” “Alfie,” he kissed your hand before you could pull it back, “Alfie Solomons. Lord of Camden, as it were.” “Alright,” you nodded, slowly catching up to his wit, “Well, Lord Solomons of Camden, will you be so good as to get me a drink?” “I most certainly will! You’ve chosen the right man,” and together you walked over to a table, “You see, I have my place in Camden, right, and among many other things, I also own a bakery! So, you can see why I would indeed be the perfect man for the job.” You had no idea what he was on about.

“So, you’re one of the toffs, right?” he inquired pleasantly. “Sadly, I am,” you said, as you eagerly took the drink from his hand.

He smirked, “What, you don’t like their fuckload of money, is that it? Or is it the privilege you have no appetite for?”

“It’s the men I have no appetite for,” and you mumbled under your breath, “dull cunts…” His sudden loud laugh startled you and he exclaimed, “Fuck me, you’re bored!” “I am.” From a distance you could see a particular irritating figure approaching and you downed your drink at once. Sadly, you had to make your excuses to the fascinating stranger, “Excuse me, he’ll be looking to talk to me…” “What, him?” Alfie turned around, “What does he want? I could have him shot, you know, if it would please milady. I could have him quartered, hung, shipped off in little tiny pieces, whatever you’d desire.” You smiled politely at him, “He’s the man I’m about to get married to. So, you might as well shoot me.” And with that you walked off, dreading what was to come next. The only comfort you felt was feeling the eyes of Alfie Solomons follow you across the room. And you hoped to God you’d see him again soon.

Alfie then made his way across the room, “Tommy, as a friend to a friend, who was that lovely young lady I was just speaking to?” Tommy took a slow drag from his cigarette and frowned, “Which one, Alfie?” “That lovely creature, right there, being bored as fuck by this whole thing.” “Oh, you mean Y/N.” “The very one.” Tommy slowly turned towards Alfie and in a low voice he said, “She is, as you would say, ‘off the fucking menu’.”

“Shame.”

*** “Miss? Miss? Miss, you can’t just walk in here…” “I’m looking for Mr. Solomons,” you announced yourself and you pushed past the Jewish boy, who was desperately trying to keep you out. The thing was: you weren’t to be kept out.

“He’s not here!” “He is,” you stated matter-of-factly, “one of your colleagues told me so!” Ollie was now desperately running after you, while you just kept on marching in, “Miss, this is a bakery…” You lifted one sarcastic eyebrow, “I can see that… Not to worry, though! Mr. Solomons is expecting me!” From the office down at the other end of the long corridor beneath the ground, a husky voice responded, “Am I?” And you put on your best smile, “Hello, Mr. Solomons! I believe you were expecting me?” “Was I?” but he didn’t look unhappy about it at all. “Well you did say you were at my service,” and you sauntered into his office. “I did,” he grinned, “Fucking hell woman, and here you are, large as fucking life.” “That’s no way to speak to a lady,” you feigned discontent. Alfie nodded and stroked his beard, “Alright, so how should I speak to a lady? Or more specifically, how should I speak to one who has evidently escaped from yet another boring as fuck charity dinner of some kind where all the dull cunts of the world have gathered, including her own brothers, father and husband to be, right?” You blushed. “I’m right, aren’t I.” It wasn’t a question.

But you quickly composed yourself, “Would it surprise you if I told you you’ve been on my mind, Mr. Solomons?” “Call me Alfie, love.” “Mr. Solomons.” And again he grinned that cocky grin that made his eyes twinkle, “Alright, if that’s how you want to play it… Ollie, dear boy, close your mouth, yeah?” Because Ollie had followed you in, no idea what was going on and his mouth hanging open, gaping in surprise of the scene unfolding before him.

“Alfie…” he started, “You know this is Lady Y/N, right? Her family is loaded, not to mention…” “I am well aware,” Alfie interrupted him, “Now, why don’t you take the lady’s coat and offer her a chair.” After you sat down, Alfie pleasantly continued talking to you, “How may I help? Come to take me up on the offer of me shooting your fiancé?”

“Maybe,” you joked. “Nah,” he narrowed his eyes, “You thought you could walk in here and start fucking about with the Jews, didn’t ya… You thought: I got this poor lad at the party to offer me a drink and if I play my fucking cards right, he’ll do it again, right? Or maybe you really did think: here’s a sodomite who can relieve me of this god-awful burden of my god-awful marriage to come. He’s nothing but a gangster, from the ends of the fucking earth, a place so dirty they even call it Camden, he’ll do, right? And he’ll do whatever the fuck I ask of him because I bat my fucking eyelashes and smile sweetly and it’ll drive him fucking crazy, thinking about me in my perfect little fucking red dress at the party and he’ll be like a pawn in the game we rich people play every fucking day. That’s it, ain’t it.” Suddenly, you felt cold. All humour drained from your face and you actually felt a little scared. You’d made a mistake coming here. “Mr. Solomons…” He held up a hand, to shush you, “That’s it, isn’t it. That’s fucking it, right? You thought you could use the Jew for your one last dirty evening of freedom.” Was he right? In a way he was… And then his face suddenly brightened again, “I have no objections of course.” “What?” was all you could stumble. “I’m just playing with you, love,” he smirked, “I figured if you can drive me crazy for a whole fucking week, I might as well try to knock you off balance as well as it were, right, just to see if I can…” “Well, you can, Mr. Solomons,” because you were officially confused now, not to mention a little offended. Alfie leaned forward on his desk and suddenly produced a bottle from a drawer, “How about a drink, darling?” “Gladly.” “And, how about I take you out, yeah? Show you all the fine and dirty places Camden has to offer. I mean that’s what slumming is all about, eh!” You still weren’t sure if he was serious or not. But you were curious, “Mr. Solomons, I’d love for you to take me out. Anything to get out of that charity dinner I just escaped from,” and you winked at him, “Yes, you were indeed right. Clever you.” “Clever me…” he nodded, “Clever me… Alright, but if I am taking you, I need you to start calling me ‘Alfie’.”

“Oh, I couldn’t, Mr. Solomons...” He lowered his voice, but his eyes sparkled again, “Alfie. Or I’ll make you call me Mr. Solomons for a very different reason, alright?” You blushed again, but not for fear this time, and whispered, “Alfie.”

***

In three weeks, you were to be married to the honourable Lord Branston, and it hung over you like a thunderstorm announced, waiting to destroy everything you loved in its path. You’d been meeting with Alfie secretly for weeks now. He’d taken you to clubs, seedy bars, fancy restaurants and exciting races. You were finally leading the life you’d always craved: you were never bored with him. The only problem was that it all had to take place in the shadows and only a few people knew of the secret life you lived. Of course, you still attended the charity dinners and formal balls organized by your father, where you chatted pleasantly to all the rich men and fine ladies who were invited, but no one seemed to notice when you left early and ran off to meet with the handsome man down in his bakery. But still, in three weeks time you were to be married.

And tonight, you were required to make an appearance at yet another formal party. But you were hopeful: the host was some rich factory owner from America, who had come over to secure a deal with some factory owners here in London. So, maybe Tommy would be there. And there he was, talking to the American as if he’d actually received an invitation, instead of just having marched in here with his fifty brothers in tow.

“Tommy!” you called out, as soon as you spotted him, “So good to see you!” He smiled at you, which he hardly ever did these days, but he made an exception just for you, “Oh, so now we’re not even going to pretend we don’t know each other, eh?” “Fuck pretending,” you grumbled.

“Such bad words for a lady. Must’ve been hanging out with the wrong sort of people…” You eyed him cynically, “Tommy, please, you know I love you deeply, but only because you’re the only one in the world who doesn’t want me to behave all the time and be ‘a lady’…” “Liar,” he said, “I have it on good authority I’m no longer the only one.” You betrayed yourself before you could stop yourself, “Who told you!” “So it’s true then,” Tommy turned to you triumphantly, “Ada was right after all!” You sighed deeply. “Our Y/N and Alfie Solomons. Who would’ve thought, eh?” he mused, “And even after I told him to stay away.” “You fucking did what?” “I told him you weren’t available.” “Why,” you snapped. He smirked slightly, “Lord Branston? Or have you forgotten about him already.”

You hadn’t forgotten, though not for lack of trying. Tommy frowned and a little concern crept into his features, “Do you have any idea what you’re getting yourself into with Alfie?” “Probably not…” “He’s a dangerous man, Y/N.” “And you’re not?” you replied angrily. For a moment Tommy paused, “I am. But I’ve known you since before the war and you’re like a sister to me, so I should be the one to warn you.” Still, you were annoyed and it showed, “Consider me warned.” “Y/N…” “No,” you held up a hand and lowered your voice to hide your anger from the other party guests, “Tommy, I’ve been going mad these last couple of years, you know I have. I can’t stand these people, even though I’m one of them, I just can’t take another fucking minute surrounded by these lot! All I do is get dressed and dine and converse about clothes and hair and horses. I’m just there to look pretty for them! It’s all money and a good reputation, it’s literally all they care about, and I want more. Don’t you understand? The idea of marrying into the bourgeoisie, it’s like hell, because that’ll be it. That’ll be the end of my life. I’ll be trapped. Caged, like I’ve always been. I need to get out, Tommy. I need… more.” He’d been smoking slowly while you’d spoken and he remained silent a little while longer. Then he said, “Alright, I’ll see what I can do.” “What?” you anger made way for confusion, “How can you change anything?” “Lord Branston,” Tommy replied by manner of explanation. But before you could ask more or even protest, he’d walked off and started whispering to one of his brothers. Moments later, they left. “Now what?” you said, to no one in particular.

***

After the party had ended last night, it’d been too late for you to leave London to go back home. Of course, you’d planned on giving them the slip to go and see Alfie, but you never got the chance to. So, instead, you’d stayed at the house of one of your cousins, who had a house in London. She was a sweet girl, a bit vapid, but her terrace house was large enough to not get into each others way when you stayed there.

You opened your eyes slowly, as the morning sun crept through the curtains. And then you saw him, the cheeky devil, sitting right there at the end of your bed. “What the hell are you doing here!” you exclaimed. “Morning, love,” Alfie said softly. “Alfie, how did you get in here!” “You know, these old and fancy houses are lovely, they really are, though the draft must be a bit of a hassle I imagine… but the thing is they all have these downstairs bedrooms, right? And I have this mate who used to procure, that’s a good word for it innit, procure items from said houses in the middle of the night. So, this mate yeah, he told me about these windows, the ones you’ve got right here as well, made with the finest glass and wood, all shipped from Norway I believe and the carvings right here? Must’ve cost a fortune…” You rubbed your eyes, “Get to the point, mate.” “Right, well the hinges are shite, apparently. Took me all of two minutes to break open the fucking thing and simply hop on inside, so I could sit right here, on the bed, waiting for an angel to wake up.”

“You broke the window?” you scolded, slightly. “Really, woman, that’s all you heard?” You had to smile, “Well, when you talk that much, one is forced to filter a little bit!” “Oh, is one…” he mocked. “Shut up. Get in the bed.” That actually had him stunned for a second, “I’m not against your proposal,” he finally said, “in fact, I’m more than happy to take you up on that offer. But, doesn’t your cousin live here? The honourable miss what’s-her-face from ladidah?” “That’s the one.” “Well, does she have fucking ears?”   “Alfie,” you sighed, “just be quiet, alright?” “I’ll be,” he emphasized, “but you won’t, love.” Many blissful moments later, you were lying together in the featherbed, completely and perfectly content. This is what it must be like, you thought, this is what happiness is. Alfie turned to look at you and he stroked his beard for a second, like he always did when he was thinking, “I’ve had a thought, love.” “Always dangerous…” “No, this is a good one, I promise.” You reached over him for a cigarette and lit it before letting yourself fall back into the pillows once again. “How about it?” Alfie continued in a soft voice that was very unlike him, “how about you and me get married, love.” You choked and coughed on the cigarette.

“Alfie, are you drunk?” you asked seriously.

“Never touch the stuff.” “Are you joking?” “I’d never joke about something like that, alright, not with you.” You could only stammer, “We can’t… I mean, what about my family… fucking Lord Branston? And what… what about me not being, you know, Jewish?” “Details, love.” You coughed a laugh, “Lord Branston is hardly a detail. He’s the most important…” “Tommy took care of him,” Alfie interrupted you. “Oh fuck… did he kill him?” Alfie laughed, “Tommy’s not a total idiot, now is he? Let’s just say, Lord Branston has fallen out of favour with the toffs. Apparently, he was found by some other cunts from the house or Lords, in bed, with a few too many ladies of the night. Very naughty, that one…” “How?” you questioned, “He’d never…” Alfie winked, “Tommy took care of him.” “Tommy took care of him…” you repeated, slightly baffled. “Back to my original question, babe…” “Right,” you shook your head, still trying to process it all, “Are you certain, though? Marry me? Me and my family are everything you despise in the world.” “You are all I need and love in the world. Trust me, love, we don’t need none of them, as long as we’re together, right?” “Right,” you whispered, deeply, deeply in love. “Is that a yes?” “Yes, Alfie, babe,” you shouted out playfully, “I’ll marry you every day, for the rest of my life, just to be sure! “No,” he said, no sign of humour, “I’ll just marry you once and then I’ll stay with you forever.” “When do we run away?” your mind raced at the opportunities, but also at the obstacles you’d face. “I won’t hide ya, love. We’ll stay right here in London and I’ll make sure you’ll never be bored again.” And that was all you needed to hear. “But Alfie,” you finally asked, “I thought Tommy was your enemy?” “Tommy?” he raised his eyebrows way up high, “Nah, that’s just a silly game we play, really.” “Then what is he to you?” “Well, Tommy’s my very good friend, isn’t he.” You thought about it for a second and smiled, thinking of all he’d done for you. And then you said softly, “Yeah, mine too.”

***

Masterlist

[threepoint14art]

THAT WAS SO FAST OH MY GOD @chocottang hiii :3c I'm glad you don't mind I'm glad you don't mind!! ok so for. the other two, neuron activation AGAIN for the other two, yet another info dump (not as long) TLDR we changed Fox, Megs house did burn down like in canon

SO! Fox is the one who we changed the most, however i did keep his fear of fire, but not for the reasons you might think (shinji chair image)

Since both spring and meg were victims to a fire i wanted to switch it up with this little guy, if you see the pictures on my prev response the little guy with long red hair thats fox (trans beam ily), you can see that the boy is way too happy and kinda chill about his situation while meg just looks like the most dissociated kid you will ever see, this has a reason.

Fox was kinda just, born into the system, he's the type of case where he was abandoned at birth and he just lived there, he does not really care for his bio parents or anything of the sort, because he had Spring. So he always seemed happy and pleased ever since he met spring because he didn't have anyone to miss, his reference for what a parent was alligned with Spring so well he didn't grieve not having a "real family" for too long. Fox sorta defenitelly sees spring as more than an older brother, and it eats him up inside because he can recognize that spring should have been at the club/ref and that him forcing that parental role onto him might just make spring feel a little insane, because he can see that spring doesnt really see himself as a full fledged adult much LESS a parent. But anyways that wasn't the point Fox's schordingers parent situation just drives me up a wall

Fox was born into it, however his entire fear of fire thing is sort of aquired, aquired from Spring who is (reasonably so) deadly fucking afraid of fire, and spring who still somehow managed to cook for them two when they were too small to do so, and spring who has had a lot of literal shutdowns and meltdowns over fire throughout the years. If you saw the person you trusted the most and protected you, if you saw your dad big brother, freak out so hard at something you would grow really wary of it too, aquired.

Meg,,,,,,,, still lost it all to a fire, im gonna be honest i dont remember if it was ever proven that she and fox were bio siblings but thats not the case anymore (still very much siblings though), but the elusive burnt down picture of megs "older brother" I took as,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, drumrolls,,,, Maggie from the nightmares

Basically as a child would do, this little thing sort of throws a temper tantrum one night bcause she thinks their family’s being really unfair and decides to run away from home, her parents decide to make a really big sweet dinner and it starts the fucking house fire. Maggie is not caught in it because he went outside to look for Meg, and Meg comes home in the middle of the night to see their house in flames, police and firefighters surrounding them and talking to their crying brother. Tries to run in, gets burned really badly on the face and on their leg. And then goes to the orphanage.

Survivors guilt and allat, the kid dissociated so incredebly horribly hard for so many years and also blocked out a lot of stuff. She doesn't really remember much other than THAT night and some disconected memories of loving her parents, but doesn't remember faces, and also forgot most if not all about Maggies existence, the kid dissociated and forgot incredebly hard. Also is very adverse to fire, which contributes to Fox and that second hand fear of fire of his.

thank you multi he really does have all of them he shoulda've been at the club <///3

Ok so first of all i love reading your guys' tags always and forever, second of all @chocottang HIII CHOCOO (please do tell me if tagging annoys you!) You turned my braincell on, you asked such a simple and normal question and now you are gonna get lore'd about spring im so sorry- ok ok so answer here and then i start ranting about all the things ive done to this poor man if anyones interested:

He is not on the aro spectrum he just never really thought about romance for the LONGEST time. Rubbing my hands like an evil fly why would that be? Read to find out

Also while spring himself is not on the aroace spectrum i do present cami, owynn, bonnie and puppet to you humbly, the silliests ever

Basically, as you MAY have noticed, the guy has a lot of burn scars (shocking), that's because when he was little his house burnt down and his parents died and he got super fucked up, he's been in the foster system since he was like 10, no family wanted to take him in because his parents had him when they were super young and thus were disowned. So we start off strong with that, and it gets worse!

I wanted to make spring a little more unhinged because wowzers the sprintrap animatronic is evil, however his chill attitude captivated me, so i decided to make the unhinged him be his younger self, children are cruel adults are scary people in the foster system get treated as "a way to give people who cant have bio kids families" or "charity cases" instead of normal children with a lot of unnadressed issues who deserve a change to grow up with a semblance of normalcy. He was alone and scared and angry at life and thus tended to get into a lot of fights and to stealing stuff and such. Problem kid status + visibly scarred led him to never really finding a permanent home, not that he wanted one, because most of the adults in his life scared him and also wanted him to have a "new" life, AKA forget his parents and accept these new strangers as parents, horrible!

This little kid who is very scared and alone and wishes for nothing more than his parents calming him down again meets 2 even smaller kids and just, projects onto them. He started coping with all the stuff in his head through taking care of children and pretending it was also him who was being taken care of so softly and tenderly, the children being meg and fox. He just starts taking care of them and subconciously growing up really fast to get them the support and whatever they need and then out of literally nowhere hes 18. He's like "oh crap wth" Gets send off to the real world having BARELY graduated from highschool and with some money, he cannot bear the thought of losing any more people and just looks into becoming the other 2's legal guardian and gets them out of the system to live with him in the worlds cheapest house he could find

So what I mean is that he hyperfocused on being a caretaker and getting money and growing up and getting ten thousand things that the thought of romance was not even anywhere near his head, having FRIENDS was nowhere near his head. He had to find a job he had to enroll the other 2 into school he had to find another job he had to make sure their house didn't fall apart by the seams. Also fun fact, the more he grew up the more he realized he is a literal carbon copy of his dad, but visibly scarred! have fun looking in the mirror buddy

In his head, he does not really see himself as a full grown adult even though hes 24, and his weird thought of "adults being scary" still persists even though he himself is one, he doesn't like talking to grown people and that isn't helped by how he spent most of his life with Fox and Meg, he is not used to talking to people his age or older and he was too busy to actually process that romance might be something he wanted when he was just drowning in ten other thousand things already. As he got older and fox and meg also got older and got partime jobs his burden was lessened a lot and he was allowed to CHILL a little

So those 2 idiots in the drawing are vincent and leti,,, they might look like ocs and at this point they kinda are but they ARE based on the bg characters of Camarero and "Novia", they both also have their own can of worms to unpack it's insane.

Spring met Vincent at work, new coworker new hire and then Leti just stopped by sometimes to talk to vincent and he went thought ten billion crisis because "having a crush as an adult is so embarassing i need to be paying taxes"

So TLDR he had his first crushes ever at 24 because at that age he was actually allowed to chill a little and his brain finally had the room to process that romance was in fact, real. He also had to go through the "i like men???????? Im poly??¿¿" thoughts at 24, he shoulda've been at the club/ref

[p33paw]

silent library

kaeya x f!reader

summary | getting fucked by kaeya in a library while trying to keep quiet

warnings | nsfw

words count | ~4.9k

links | ao3

"Don't you have a job?" I ask, tilting my head to meet eyes with the man hovering at my side.

Calvary Captain Kaeya has made it his life's purpose to annoy me. I've had to see him every day since I accepted an internship studying under Lisa. He hovers in the library, doing nothing of use besides staring and occasionally balancing a pencil to entertain himself.

I have to wonder if he has something going on with Miss Lisa, the way he constantly stays in the library, that coy smirk curling his lips, and his stare that makes me jump. I consider him, the glow on his cheeks, and the way he postures his body— scratch that, he definitely has something going on with Lisa.

Kaeya purses his lips, pretending to look at the books next to the ones I'm searching. He runs his fingers along their spines, briefly catching my attention before he steals it back with his voice.

"You know? I do." He says, and that's all he says, before turning back to back to the bookshelf with a smug smile.

I squint, tapping my fingers against the lip of the shelf just beneath where the book I want should be.

"Don't you have somewhere else to be? Anywhere else?" I ask, continuing to stare at him as he coyly keeps his gaze averted. "...maybe even somewhere to do with your job." I draw the last word out, staring him down for the duration, until he turns and looks at me again.

I can tell by the look on his face, I won't like his response.

"What do you mean?" He asks back. "I'm busy helping you."

My eyes roll back in my head before I can stop them. With a huff, I turn away from him, sharp, heading deeper into the library, looking for the missing book.

He's driving me insane.

I slip between the shelves, to a room for storage in the back, and key my way in. I leave the door cracked, walking the room, carefully checking the names of the books, eager to find the last one I need and retreat to Lisa's office for a moment of respite. The book needed takes me all the way to the back of the room, tucked in a corner. I search through the names, glancing away only to catch my eyes on Kaeya as he steps into the room, still following me, quietly closing the door behind him.

I spot the book I need on the top shelf. I lift to my tip toes, leveraging my weight with my other hand planted on a shelf, trying to reach it. I even jump, and nearly graze it with my fingertips. I jump again, but don't get any closer.

I sigh, stepping back. I'll just have to go get the step ladder to get it, as embarrassing as it feels. Before I can turn away, I feel warmth press against the length of my back and something solid wrap my waist. I'm held in place, looking up to watch as Kaeya bumps his chest to the back of my head, reaches over me, and plucks a book from the top shelf.

I know I'm staring, embarrassment warm on my face and my lips slightly parted as I process the proximity. Once it settles, my heart thumps, my hands tightening around the books I already have.

Kaeya lowers himself back down with the book, and though he isn't leaning over me anymore, the arm he placed around my waist to steady me stays there.

"This what you needed?" He asks, dropping the book into my hands. I glance up, startling from my thoughts to view the book in question.

I take one look at the cover, and huff another sigh.

"No, not at all." I say, tilting my head back into his chest to look at him. I try to be confident despite the embarrassment seeding in my core.

He lifts his brows, lifting up to put the book back where he got it.

"Which book?" He asks this time, hovering his hand along the shelf, tightening the arm he has looped around my waist.

I squeak out the name, breath catching in my throat as Kaeya tugs me closer, flush against the front of his body. His fingers press into the spine of another book, tilting it out before he grabs it, bringing it down.

He leans in, until his face is hovering directly next to mine, close enough I can feel his breath against my cheek.

"Am I right this time?" He asks, and my stomach jumps.

"What?" I ask, surprisingly unfocused on what he has to say.

He shakes the book in this hand.

"Is this the right book?" He asks again.

I finally find the wherewithal to focus my eyes, looking at the book, reading the cover.

"Yes." I sputter out, darting my hand forward to lift the book from him and place it with the pile in my arms.

I expect that to end the interaction, but our position holds, Kaeya pressed to my back, his arm around my waist, his hand gripping my hip, and his face—

"Did you need help grabbing another book?" He asks.

"What?" I ask again, swallowing around my tongue.

Kaeya laughs this time, and I can feel it rumbling in his chest against my back. "Do you need help grabbing another book?" He repeats.

"No, that was the last one." I say back, trying to get control of my breath and my racing mind.

He hums, like he understands, but we still don't move from our position.

Do I have to ask him to let go?

Why is he doing this?

His hand does feel nice— warm— his chest is broad— I can smell the mint on his breath, and—

"You're still holding me." Slips from my mouth.

"Oh?" Kaeya says back.

His hand only tightens, his thumb starting to move, petting soothing circles into my hip.

"That's true." He continues, tilting his head in further, until his lips are pressed against my ear. "I didn't think you wanted me to stop." He says, voice low and soft, exhaling a hot breath against my ear.

I shiver, trying to take a grounding breath, stomach fluttering, fingers flexing as I fight to get a grasp on myself.

"What makes you think that?" I ask, the moment I've steadied my voice enough.

Kaeya presses in closer, pushing me in toward the bookshelves, plastering himself against my back. He lifts his free hand to cup my face, stroking the corner of my lips with his thumb feather-light.

"You're making such a pretty face— and your breath is quick." Kaeya says.

He grazes his thumb across my lips, down my chin. His skin is rough from wear as he drags his hand across my jaw, down my throat, and to my chest. He presses against the collar of my dress with his fingertips, slipping them just in, before pausing and holding with his fingers digging into the soft flesh.

"—plus," He continues, "Your heart is pounding."

I take a sharp breath, tilting my head back into his chest, feeling the flush of embarrassment blanket my face.

"And, I know that if you wanted me to take my hands off, you'd use your words and ask me to." He says, sounding proud of himself.

That's... true enough.

I turn my face further into his chest, until I can tilt my chin back and look at him, meeting his eyes. I muster my courage, and ask the question burning in my mind.

"Aren't you involved with Miss Lisa?" I ask.

Kaeya splits into toothy grin, eyebrows flying up.

"With Lisa?" He questions. "She's practically married to Jean. What would ever give you the idea that we're together?"

Oh.

Wait—

Is that why Jean is always here?

I drag my tongue along my lower lip as I think, catching his gaze. Part of his smile fades as he roughly swallows, watching my mouth, holding me even tighter.

"I dont— know." I start, "You're always here and— glowing— and— lingering and— following me— and—" I start, slowing down as I say the words.

Huh, I'm kind of stupid— aren't I?

Kaeya watches me come to my conclusion with a quirked brow and a grin.

"Oh." I mumble, blinking at him.

He's here for me.

"Yeah. Oh." He says back.

New embarrassment rolls into my chest. It's cut short by Kaeya suddenly remembering he's torturing me, his hands twitching to move on my body again. He lifts the first hand from my shirt, back up my chest, then directly to my neck just under my chin. His palm is wide where it rests against my throat, his fingers holding either side of my face. He tilts my head to the side, until my neck is exposed to him, and leans in closer, breathing against it. He brushes up the length with his lips, never landing them on my skin, and back up to my ear.

"Are you going to ask me to stop?" He questions, softening his voice again.

I take another sharp inhale, my thighs pressing together as my stomach jumps.

"No." I breathe out, as resolute as I can manage.

I feel his lips warp into a smile, the hand he had on my hip finally releasing me. He uses it to grab the books from my hands, placing them in a stack on the shelf, one by one, until my hands are free. Once done, he lifts that hand to the side of my neck, dragging his fingers along my skin as he brushes my hair away. He leans in, his lips landing on my skin at the joint where my neck meets my shoulder.

My eyes immediately flutter, my head tilting in his grip to give him better access. He kisses soft, first, a barely there peck like a warning. He pauses for a moment, waiting until I nod in his grip, then presses back in. This time, he kisses with purpose, his lips pressed firm. He opens his mouth, scraping against my shoulder with his teeth, pushing his scalding hot tongue out to brand my skin.

My breath catches, both of my hands darting forward to grip the bookshelf and steady myself.

Kaeya keeps one hand firmly planted on my throat, but the other grazes down my side, across my body, until he reaches the middle of my thigh where my dress rests. He plays with the hem, pressing another sloppy kiss to the bend of my shoulder before his mouth moves up to my neck. He hovers there, letting out an exhale as warning before he lands his lips on my skin, open mouthed. I hardly have time to gasp before his mouth tightens, teeth pressing into the soft flesh as he works the skin, sucking to bruise.

I let out another gasp tailed by a soft but needy moan. I tilt my hips, pressing back into the hard line of Kaeya's body. He follows my lead, using his full weight to press against me, crowding me against the bookshelf as I finally feel his lap connect with my ass, and his thigh force between my legs. His hips roll, grinding himself against me. I squeeze his thigh between mine, then press against it. I move with him, a barely louder moan escaping me as I feel his clothed cock jump against my stimulation.

Kaeya pulls off my neck, digging into the soft flesh of my throat and thigh with his fingers.

"Stay quiet." He whispers.

I find the wherewithal to open my eyes, glancing around at our surroundings, suddenly remembering the fact that we're huddled in the corner of a back room in a public library, and that anyone could walk in on us right now.

Do I care enough to stop? No.

I lift one of my hands, stuffing my mouth with my sleeve to muffle myself as Kaeya's hand slips just under the hem of my dress.

"Good girl." He breathes out, brushing with his fingertips along my stomach and up. The praise makes me warm, melting in his hands.

He continues higher, until he reaches the bottom of my bra. He hooks his fingers into it at the center, lifting the piece until it's over both of my breasts, exposing them under the dress. His hand is quick to move higher, dragging the roughened skin of his fingers against my breast and nipples. He stimulates my nipple with his thumb, playing with it until it stiffens to a peak, lifting his thigh to press between my legs.

It feels fucking good.

I'm suddenly very thankful for the sleeve stuffed into my mouth, quiet whimpered moans escaping from low in my throat like a near constant, my body rolling back into Kaeya's with purpose and desperation. He grunts in return, only playing with my breasts more roughly, groping them, pinching my hardened nipples until I whine. He only slows to kiss my neck again, his tongue burning where it drags against my skin.

I drop my sleeve from my mouth, letting out an unmitigated gasp.

"I'm— surprised—" I breathe out, eyes fluttering as I struggle to focus. "I almost thought your mouth would be— ah— cold—"

Kaeya's hands pause as he releases a breathy laugh. Suddenly, where his fingers rest against my breast there's a shift. His fingers go ice cold, raising goosebumps where they touch. He moves them toward my nipple, and I flinch away as they connect with a sharp breath.

"Kaeya—" I chastise, whining in protest.

Before it even feels like he's started, he stops, and his hands return to the same warmth. He laughs again, brushing his now-warm fingertips down the center of my chest. He follows the line down, between the middle of my ribs, to my stomach, until he's resting with his finger tips at the waistband of my panties. He waits.

"Can I?" He asks, then presses another kiss to my neck, rocking his obviously erect cock against my ass.

I close my already half-lidded eyes, fight to steady my breathing, stuff my mouth with my sleeve then nod.

Kaeya wastes no time, his hand immediately pushing past the waistband of my panties, his fingers sliding against my pussy, dragging through everything soft and sensitive. He moves with ease, collecting slick with his fingertips as he slides between my lips, quickly finding my clit with a practiced ease. He moves slowly, gently, petting my clit as I go limp, sighing in relaxed pleasure.

"How's that?" He asks, breathy, right against my neck.

I make a noise muffled by my sleeve, loosely nodding.

I hear another laugh. "That good?" Kaeya asks.

I make another noise, my eyes rolling back, my free hand gripping the bookshelf in front of me to keep me upright.

I let out a sigh, nodding again.

His fingers push back, moving deeper, until he finds my entrance. With no warning, he pushes in, two at once, and my second hand darts forward, also landing to grip the shelf and keep me upright. I let out a wild moan, uninhibited.

Kaeya grunts, quickly lifting his hand from my throat. He covers my mouth with it, gripping tight, trying his best to quiet me as I moan against his palm. Despite the mishap, he continues, burying his massive fingers inside of me as deep as he can get them.

He keeps his mouth on my neck, moving his lips and tongue against my skin. He curls his fingers inside of me, and I nearly buckle, whimpering against his palm. I feel myself throb from the stimulation, gripping down on his fingers, milking them, trying to drag them deeper.

"You take my fingers so well—" Kaeya breathes out, quiet and soft, pumping his fingers inside of me. "God, you're going to take my cock so well—" He voice starts to take on a desperation. "Won't you, good girl?"

I nod into his hand, eyes rolling back. I'll do any goddamn thing he wants if it feels like this.

Kaeya laughs again, pulling his fingers out from inside of me. He slides them forward, refocusing my clit. He circles it in a rhythm that makes my thighs twitch. I rock my hips into it, into him, desperate enough to ride his fingers.

He notices, and takes a rougher pace, flicking his fingers against my clit fast enough my brain stutters and my hips pause. All I can do is grip the shelf in front of me, melting into his control.

Kaeya's mouth moves up my neck, pressing sloppy kisses as he goes, his fingers never pausing in their stimulation. He kisses the length of it to my jaw, mouths the tendon there, then moves higher, until his lips are pressed to my ear again.

"You're making such a pretty face— so desperate like that—" He breathes out.

I blink hazily, parting my lips only to mouth at his fingers. He presses a kiss to my ear, then nips the lobe before coming back up, breathing hot, heavy breaths against the side of my face.

"Come on my fingers so I can fuck you." He says, voice stern. "Let me watch that pretty little face come for me."

I blink rapidly, nodding into his hand, hips jerking as he continues to expertly stimulate my clit. I feel the pleasure start to build, heat spiking in my stomach, unfurling up, numbing my legs and arms. A tremble starts in my core that branches out, until I'm barely upright with my shaking legs, whimpered moans escaping me into his palm.

It happens like a crash, a wave of numbing relief and pleasure as I gasp into Kaeya's palm, guttural moans ripping through my throat.

He makes a noise as well, a low moan, something like desperation. His hand immediately drops from my mouth, exposing my soft needy noises as he drags it down and back.

"You feel so— you feel so good—" I pant out.

"I know." He says back as I hear a click and zipper, what sounds like him obviously fumbling with his belt, before my panties are roughly jerked down my thighs.

I manage to look back with half lidded eyes, watching Kaeya wrap his hand around the base of his cock. It looks healthy, pretty like him, flushed red at the tip and painfully hard. He pumps it in his hand, staring back at me.

"Lift your dress." He demands.

I loosely nod, still coming down from my orgasm. I lift one hand behind me to bundle the fabric of my dress and lift it up to my waist, holding it there.

Kaeya reaches forward with the hand not holding his cock, and grips my ass, dragging his thumb through my pussy, then holding it open. It's beyond embarrassing to feel the cold air hit the sensitive skin of my pussy, knowing he's staring right at it.

He takes a moment, pressing just past my entrance with his thumb, then pulling it back out and dragging the slick down to my clit. He makes a pleased noise from behind me as he watches it, playing with my pussy for fun. I make a noise, tilting my hips higher, arching my back, trying to invite him in and get him to fuck me already.

He pulls his hand back, using it to slap my ass before he moves it back down, holding my pussy spread as I grip on air.

"Bossy, aren't you?" He chastises, finally tilting his hips forward until the head of his cock slips between my pussy lips.

He rubs against me, dragging his cock through my slick, rubbing against my clit, then resting flush to my entrance, paused just before pushing inside.

"You want my cock, don't you?" He breathes out. "Show me how bad."

I whimper, nodding, then brace myself against the shelves. I tilt my hips, trying to keep steady as I ease back, forcing his cock to push inside of me. The initial stretch pulls a high noise from me that Kaeya catches. He covers my mouth with his hand again, this time forcing his fingers into my mouth. I wrap them with my lips, then fuck myself back onto his cock, finishing burying the length inside of me in one smooth motion. I relax, feeling the full stretch of his cock buried inside of me.

Kaeya's free hand darts up, planting on my hip and gripping down tight. He digs into the flesh hard enough bruise, then holds me in place as he starts to snap his hips against me. His noises are quiet, controlled, just audible beneath the sound of our skin as it connects. His pace is rough, his hips pulling back just to snap forward, fucking me audibly.

Both of us lose our words, solely focused on the friction between our bodies and the fight to keep quiet as we connect, Kaeya's hard cock fucking in and out of me with each roll of his hips. I'm a slobbering mess against his palm, constant moans and whimpers dripping from my throat as he fucks me hard enough I bounce against the bookshelf I'm propped against, holding on for the ride.

Kaeya's hand adjusts, keeping a firm grip on my hip to hold me in place as he fucks himself into me from behind. He finds a rhythm, his hard cock pulsing inside of me as he uses my body to stimulate it.

I crane my neck, looking back to watch his face, staring at his blissed expression, half-lidded eyes, just parted lips. His eyes are locked down, watching where he's burying his cock inside of me. Once he looks up, catching me staring, he smirks, slowing the roll of his hips.

"You look so pretty under me like this." He praises, dragging his hand from my hip to my ass, then up my back to my waist, instead holding there.

I hate how smug he is.

Tired of being a pathetic mewling mess, I take the control that I can. I tighten my pussy, gripping down on Kaeya's cock, pulsing along the length. His reaction is immediate, his hand gripping down hard on my hip, the other dropping from my mouth, his hips stuttering to a stop. He nearly buckles, leaning into me.

"Fuck—" He pants out under his breath, not moving other than to rock himself against me. "You feel so— you— you feel so—"

"Good?" I breathe out. "I know." I try to copy his earlier attitude, giving him what he gave me.

He huffs a laugh, followed by a moaned sigh as I flutter my pussy around the length of his cock. He leans in until he can land his lips back on my shoulder, lifting his hand back up to cover my mouth, forcing his fingers back between my lips.

He presses a single kiss before opening his mouth, dragging his tongue out to taste my skin. He licks, then bites down hard, holding tight. Finally, he snaps his hips again, his moans and grunts muffled by my shoulder as he snaps against me. I do my best to keep myself tightened, gripping down on his cock, milking his orgasm out.

His hand fumbles at my waist, his fingers forcing themselves back between my legs. He slides them against my pussy, going back to feel where he's fucking himself into me first, before landing on my clit. I nearly jump when he presses in with his fingers, focused, stuttering them against my clit rapidly.

I arch my back, having to bite down on his fingers to keep muffled, another orgasm rapidly building with the ebb low in my stomach. He keeps his mouth planted on my shoulder, muffling his own moans, snapping his hips against me hard enough the books on the shelves knock together.

I barely realize I'm about to cum before I do, shivering into an orgasm, gripping the bookshelf as it overtakes my body, pulsing where I'm split on Kaeya's cock. He doesn't slow, instead quickens his hips and fingers, until I have to dart a hand down, scrambling to dig my nails into his wrist as I fight the urge to cry out.

He's quick to listen, lifting that hand to my stomach and supporting me as he loses his rhythm, pounding himself into me with desperate uneven thrusts, grunts low in his throat as he bites harder on my shoulder.

I shiver in relief when I feel his cock jerk, warmth spreading low in my abdomen as his hips snap the final few times, then pause as he rocks against me, fucking his softening cock and cum as deeply as he can get it.

We hold for a moment, collecting ourselves in eachother's arms, wrapped tight, before we remember where we are.

Kaeya pulls his fingers from my mouth, lifting his own mouth from my sore shoulder, leaving it wet where air hits it. He shifts his hips slowly, supporting me with both hands as he pulls out.

"So good— such a good girl—" He repeats murmured praise, low and slow, voice rough. "You made me feel so good."

I'm fucked out of my mind, too far gone to care, only focused on the tremble of my legs as they fight to hold me up. I turn toward Kaeya once he pulls out of me, letting my dress fall back into place. I watch through half lidded eyes as he tucks his cock back into his pants, fastening his belt.

He catches me staring and grins, looking at me with a relaxed look. He takes a step toward me, landing his hand to cup my chin, then finally presses a kiss to my lips.

I consider it our first real kiss, sweet and chaste. He pulls back from it quickly, pressing another kiss to my forehead, then stepping back and looking down my form.

"You're such a mess." He chastises, dragging his eyes down my body.

I finally find the mental power to look for myself, greeted by the sight of cum drooling down my thighs toward my rolled panties tangled at my knees.

Kaeya drops to a crouch in front of me, looking up with a reassuring smile as he reaches forward and pulls my panties off for me. I'm confused for only a second, until he reaches forward, wiping up the length of my leg with the panties to clean the cum off of me.

It's sweet, in a weird way.

He lifts to standing, hovering close to me, the panty cum-rag in one hand, then, the door creaks open.

Kaeya startles, his hands flying behind his back to hide the panties there. My head snaps toward the door as well. I'm left speechless as I make eye contact with Lisa who looks from me to Kaeya, back to me, then her brows lift.

"Are those books giving you trouble?" She looks me up and down after her question.

"No ma'am—" I say quickly, turning to lift the books in question, willing my legs to not give out. "—I found them already."

Lisa's brows lift higher.

Damn. Maybe I shouldn't have told her that.

"Oh." She says, briefly eyeing Kaeya again. "Stop by my office whenever you're done in here, then." She says, then turns and walks away.

I grimace, turning to look at Kaeya. He turns toward me, meeting my eye contact and relaxing into a softer expression.

"I think she might know." I mumble.

Kaeya curls into a smug grin, a glint in his eye. "Good observation." He says, dripping with sarcasm.

I roll my eyes at him, lifting a hand to pinch his cheek. I don't expect the way he leans into my touch. I decide, suddenly, that if he's kissed me, it's only fair that I kiss him. I move until I'm in front of him, lift to my tip toes, then press my lips to his.

Kaeya chases it with his whole body, his free hand darting up to my cradle my waist and pull me in. I hold it for a good few seconds until I move, kissing the corner of his lips, down to his chin, then to his neck.

There, I dart my tongue out before latching my mouth on, holding with my teeth as I tighten, sucking to bruise. Once I'm sure I've left a mark on his skin, I pull back, satisfied, smiling up at Kaeya. He looks blissed out, even more than before.

I lift my hand to his chest, brushing with my thumb.

"You should go do your job." I say, grinning.

Kaeya's lips twitch to smile, then he shakes his head. "I'd rather bother you."

I smile right back, pushing away from him by shoving his shoulder, walking for the exit of the room. Kaeya keeps close, following me out, plastered to my back.

Calvary Captain Kaeya has made it his life's purpose to annoy me. I've had to see him every day since I accepted an internship studying under Lisa. He hovers in the library, doing nothing of use besides staring and occasionally balancing a pencil to entertain himself... but, nothing makes me happier.

[chaos-writes-fanfiction]

You’re in love with him

A/n I gave his mom the name Mei.

Warnings: none just some fluff, friends to lovers

Pairings: Aone × fem!reader

Being best friends with Aone came easily having your mother’s being best friends and living down the street from one another meant spending lots of time with him becoming close friends your selves. Always going to school together and waiting for him during practice so you can go home together. Having weekly sleepovers alternating who’s house unless he was away for a game, tournament or training camp.

And today you made your way to the gym to watch practice while doing homework, before staying at his house for the weekend. When you walk in the guys were still stretching.

“Hey guys” you said walking in

They greeted you with several ‘hey’ or 'hi’ from them as they started to warm up. Taking your normal seat and starting on your homework. When suddenly a volleyball comes flying at you unexpectedly and smashing into the side of your face. The whole team freezes except Aone who is running up to you.

“Way to go” Futakuchi said sarcastically to Koganegawa “dont be surprised when Aone kills you for hitting her”

“Let me see” Aone said softly moving your hand away from your cheek

Your cheek was very red and bruising already as tears fell down your cheeks. He ghosted his thumb over your cheek to wipe your tears

“Ow” you whimpered

“Here” Sakunami said handing Aone a ice pack that he wrapped a towel in so the ice wasn’t directly on your skin

He took it and gently placed it on your cheek holding your face so gently in his hand. You gently place your hand over his on your cheek.

“Thanks bear” you whisper his childhood nickname

He smiled softly at that. Then his smile dropped as he removed his hand from your cheek your hand still holding the ice pack as he turned and glared at Koganegawa.

“I promise it was an accident I didnt mean to” Koganegawa said quickly

“Then why haven’t you apologized to her?” Sakunami asked

Koganegawa ran over to you hanging his head

“I’m so sorry Senpai” he said “I didnt mean to”

“Please be more careful Koganegawa” you said

He nodded and they went back to practice you packed up your things as you waited for them to clean up to walk home with Aone. Your cheek still hurt and it had potential to give you a black eye from where it hit your cheek.

“Let’s go” Aone said when they were finished

“Can I get a piggyback ride to the train station?” You asked

He nodded and crouched down. You climb on and he holds your legs as you wrap your arms around his neck as he starts walking to the train station, resting your non bruised cheek against his his back. He set you down while waiting for the train. When you finally arrive to his house you walk in taking off your shoes in the now permanent space for you since you were over so often.

“Are you kids home?” His mom calls from the kitchen

“Yes we are Mei” you said

“Dinner is just about ready if you want to wash up” she said

Aone walks up to the bathroom to shower quickly before dinner. As you walk into the kitchen washing your hands to help finish making dinner.

“How are you dear?” Mei asked her back to you

“I’m good” you said as you move next to her cutting up some green onion

“What happened to your face?” She asked alarmed seeing the bruise

“I was watching practice and I got hit with a stray spike” you said

“Oh dear” she said “have you iced it?”

“Yes, bear made me right after it happened” you said

She smiled at the use of Aones nickname “of course he did” she said “but it looks like it still going to be around for a little while.”

“Yeah unfortunately” she said “the first year that accidentally hit me felt so bad I thought he was going to start crying”

She giggled softly and you both finished up making dinner which was shoyu ramen (soy sauce based)

“Will you go get him for dinner?” Mei asked

You nod and go upstairs to his room the shower wasn’t going anymore. So you walk to his door and knock. He opens the door letting you in. Hes drying his hair from his shower wearing black sweats and a white tshirt.

“Dinner is ready” you said smiling up at him.

“What are we having?” He asked putting the towel in his basket

“Ramen” you said

“Good its going to be cold tonight” he said.

He lightly touches your cheek again.

“I’m okay” you said

“I know I worry still” he said

“You always do” you said leaning into his touch and turn to kiss the palm of his hand “let’s go eat”

You take his hand in yours not noticing the wash of pink on his cheeks as you lead him down to the table and taking your normal seat beside him. After dinner and helping him clean up, his mom left going to the store to get some groceries and some snacks for the both of you for the weekend.

You go upstairs with him, he started on his homework and you lounge on his bed keeping him company when your phone started ringing.

“I’ll be right back” you tell him as you leave his room

You walk to the living room. And sit down and answer your girl bestfriends call

“Hey, Yachi” you said

“Hey honey” she said

“What’s up?” You asked

“I wanted to ask if you wanted to have a sleep over this weekend” she said “me, kiyoko and Saeko are here”

“Oh I can’t, I’m already staying at Aone’s this weekend” you said

“Have you confessed to him yet?” Saeko asked

“What do you mean? Hes my best friend we’ve been friends our whole lives my mom and his mom are childhood bestfriends too” you said

“You spend all your time with him unless hes away for volleyball” she said

“Well yeah…” you said

“Did something happen?” Kiyoko asked

“I got hit with a stray spike in the face” you said

“And how did he react?” Yachi asked

“He ran over right away and checked on me and gave me an ice pack after wiping my tears away” you said

“And after practice?” Saeko asked

“He gave me a piggyback ride to the train station and we took the train home, I helped his mom finish making dinner and we ate, I was keeping him company in his room while he did homework until you called” you said

“I hate to be the one to say it but you and him act more like boyfriend and girlfriend not friends” kiyoko said

You sat in silence for a little while thinking about everything.

“Hey are you still there?” Saeko asked

“Oh god” you said

“You’re in love with him” kiyoko said you could hear the smile in her voice

“Yeah…” you trailed off

“Then go tell him” Saeko said

“Is everything alright dear?” Mei asked

You hang up the phone and look up at her as she stood in front of you

“I just realized something” you whispered looking down

“What?” She asked concerned

“I’m in love with him” you whispered afraid to say it too loudly

“Who?” She asked tilting your chin up “Takanobu?”

“Yes” you whispered nodding

She smiled and kissed your forehead “I’m happy you finally figured it out” she said

“What?” You asked confused

“Your mom and I were wondering when you’d finally figure it out” she said

“Really?” You asked “you both knew?”

“Oh my dear, I’m pretty sure the only ones who didnt know were you and him” she said smiling “now, why dont you go tell him”

You nod a little hesitantly but go back upstairs after texting yachi why you hung up so suddenly. When you walk back in hes closing his text books

“Finished already?” You asked

“Yes” he said standing up and walking over to sit on his bed

You go and sit beside him.

“Can I tell you something?” You asked

“Of course” he said

You take a deep breath and let it out slowly resting your head on his shoulder “I love you, more than just friends” you said

He stiffened for a moment “you do?” He asked turning to look at you

You look back at him and nod

“I-I” he started but took a breath “I love you too, more than just a friend”

“You do?” You asked

“Yes, I have for a while” he said and he reaches into his bedside table and pulled out a letter and handed it to you

“What’s this?” You asked

“Read it” he said

You open the letter and read it;

'My dear,

We’ve been friends for as long as I remember and I’ve never been good with words; but I want you to know I cherish our friendship, but lately I find myself wanting more, I want to hold your hand when we are walking together, not just around town but at school too, I want to hold you in my arms when we have our weekly sleep overs, to wear my volleyball jacket when you come to my games. I guess I’m saying that I want you to be my girlfriend. I’ve loved you for a while now and it’s taken me this long to tell you how I feel.

-Love your Bear’

“I’ll gladly be your girlfriend” you said as tears fell down your cheeks

He wiped away your tears and kissed your forehead. You look up at him and lean towards him and gently kiss his lips, he kissed you back gently before pulling away smiling. You smile back and cuddle up to him as he gently plays with your fingers and his hand in yours. The both of you end up falling asleep cuddling.

A few weeks later, you’re getting ready, Saeko is picking you up to take you with her to a training camp to surprise Aone. You hear her honking and you run out and climb in handing Hinata your bag.

“Okay go” you said

“Are you excited?” Saeko asked

“Of course I am” you said “I’m always excited to see my boyfriend”

“Dont you see him every day?” Hinata asked

“Yep but he doesn’t know that I’m coming” you said smiling

About 45 minutes later and nearly dying from Saekos insane driving three times you finally arrive at the training camp, the first ones out are Hinata and Kageyama. Then you and Saeko got out walking towards the gym where the teams were taking a short break between games. The next team’s going up were Date Tech and Karasuno. Kiyoko and Yachi see you first.

“You came!” Yachi said smiling as she runs over and hugs you

“Saeko picked me up” you said and hug her back

“Good, we needed a few other girls” Kiyoko said smiling taking her hug

“Please, shes ditching us for her boyfriend” Saeko said rolling her eyes playfully

“Boyfriend?” Nishinoya asked “this beautiful goddess has a boyfriend?”

“Yep” you said smiling

“Who?” He asked

“Watch” Yachi said

Just then Date Tech walked over and you smile as you see your boyfriends eyes widen seeing you here. You run up to him jumping into his waiting arms wrapping your arms around his neck as he held your thighs, giving him a kiss on the cheek

“Hey” he said softly

“Hey baby” you said smiling hugging him tightly

He was holding you close not paying any attention to the stares from the other teams. As they watched the iron wall be soft for his girlfriend. He sets you back down on your feet, but holds your hand.

“Come meet my friends” you said he nods and follows you over, “this is, Kiyoko, Yachi and Saeko, kiyoko and yachi are Karasunos managers and Saeko is Tanakas older sister”

“Hi” he said “I’m Aone”

“Oh we know a lot about you” Saeko said smirking at you “this one talks about you all the time”

“Saeko I do not” you said blushing deep red

“Except you do” Kiyoko said

You whine a little bit embarrassed and hide your face in Aones chest. He starts stroking your hair.

“Its fine dear, I dont mind you talking about me” he said.

“Aone were about to start” Futakuchi said calling him over

“Go, good luck” you said

He lets you go and kisses your lips quickly before running back over to his team.

“Its definitely safe to say that you’re in love with him” Kiyoko said

“Yes I am” you said smiling watching your boyfriend getting ready to play

“So should we expect wedding invitations after you graduate?” Saeko asked in a teasing tone

“Maybe” you said blushing.