Tumgik
#but it just sucks and I don’t know when I’ll get to have time to MYSELF to rest
toadtoru · 7 hours
Text
MOVIE NIGHT
pairing: suguru x fem! reader contents: smut, mutual masturbation, getting interrupted (not caught), cockwarming, pet names (pretty girl, my girl, baby), he calls you slut once wordcount: 1.7k
MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT
Tumblr media
Your best friend, Suguru, who tries to convince you to let him fuck you while Shoko and Satoru are out getting snacks. You’re sitting on the other end of the couch, frowning at him, while Suguru merely smiles at you, urging you to come sit in his lap. 
He looks so fucking good it’s almost infuriating. Half of his hair up, the other falling down his shoulders, wearing just sweatpants and a black t-shirt. 
“Sugu, they’re gonna be back soon, we can’t,” you say, trying to send him a stern look. Suguru sighs and adjusts himself on the sofa, spreading his legs and allowing you to see the growing bulge in his sweats. He’s big already, and he’s not even fully erect. The sight makes your face grow hot, and Suguru knows you’re flustered but he just chuckles.
“C’mon, pretty,” he says, tilting his head to the side. “Come sit,”
You swallow nervously, but nevertheless, you crawl towards where he’s sitting on the sofa. Once you’re close enough, he grabs your forearms and pulls you into his lap, directly onto his length. He ignores your squeak of surprise as his hands settle on your hips, thumbs rubbing circles into your sides. 
You’re still pouting. Despite the fact that you came to him willingly, you can’t help but feel like you’ve been roped into this. Suguru hums in satisfaction, and a hand comes up to stroke your cheek. 
“There’s my girl,” he says, leaning in and kissing the corner of your lips. 
My girl. 
His words make heat pool in your belly, and you melt slightly, placing your hands on his shoulders. One of his hands squeeze your tit through your shirt, the other toys with the hem of your sleeping shorts. 
In Suguru’s opinion, you look like a perfect little gift for him. He’s been plotting this ever since you came down to the living room in that dangerously small pyjama, nipples poking through the fabric and shorts hugging your ass just right. He noticed Shoko and Satoru eyeing you as well. Satoru’s face grew positively flushed, and Shoko’s lips curled into a smile. Getting them to leave to get snacks wasn't very easy. 
But now you’re here. In his lap. Alone. 
And Suguru just wants to push those tiny shorts to the side and stretch you out on his cock till the only thing on your mind is his name. 
“We don’t have enough time,” you mumble, trying to keep up some resemblance of resistance. Suguru hums, eyes dropping down to your crotch as he begins to rub circles right over your clit. Your breath hitches, and your hands on his shoulders tighten their grip.
With his other hand he pulls up your shirt, watching your tits spill out. He cups one with his free hand, rolling his thumb over your nipple, while he leans down and sucks on the other.
“Suguru,”
The way you say his name is more of a moan than a warning. Your hips grind down on his thumb, chasing friction, and Suguru doesn’t even try to fight the smile making its way onto his face as he pulls back to watch your reactions. 
“We can be fast,” he says. You gasp when he pulls the crotch of your shorts to the side and runs his fingers through your folds. “You’ll be good for me, right?” he asks, and you nod, any coherent thoughts already turning blurry. 
“Say it,” Suguru says, and you pout when his fingers deftly avoid your clit, instead merely stroking you. 
“I’ll be good, Suguru. I promise,” you reply, and Suguru grins. His cock is hard and leaking in his boxers now, aching for attention. You eye the bulge and reach down to stroke him through his sweats. Suguru rewards you with a thumb on your clit, and begins rubbing methodic circles into the sensitive bud. You close your eyes and rest your head on his shoulder as you grind into his touch. 
Suguru decides to add a finger, pushing in and feeling your walls constrict around him. You let out a shaky breath before slipping your hand into his boxers and freeing his cock. You eye his length and a small whine leaves you at the sight. Suguru is thick. So thick and so big that the thought of having him inside you makes your cunt gush around Suguru’s hand. His tip is red and flushed, and pearly drops of precum collect around his head. 
You hesitate for a second, and Suguru notices. He kisses the crown of your head before gripping your hair with his free hand and pulling your head back to look at him. You gasp, and Suguru chuckles before giving you a chaste kiss on your lips. 
“Spit on it,” he says, and you do immediately. Suguru hums, rewarding you with another finger, and your hips stutter against his hands. His fingers are so long and thick, able to stretch you out much better than your own. 
You wrap a hand around his length, pumping him and mixing precum with spit, making the action smoother. Suguru groans and throws his head back as you use both hands to stroke him off. His ministrations on your cunt momentarily stop, and you watch his face contort in bliss before beginning to move your hips, fucking yourself on his fingers. 
Suguru’s brows knit together at the sight. Do you even know how sinful you look? What your actions do to him? Your eyes are lidded, glazed over as you pout at him, your expression begging him to ruin you. Your hands on his cock are clumsy, uncoordinated, yet he wouldn’t have it any other way. You squeeze his base, and Suguru has to stop himself from coming early.
You’re practically sin incarnate. 
“Look at you,” his voice is a mix of lust and disbelief. His eyes fall to where your hips are swirling in circles on his fingers. “You were so hesitant a second ago. What were your words? We can’t, Sugu,” his tone is teasing.
“Now you’re fucking yourself on my fingers like a slut.”
You whine, and Suguru decides to add another finger for good measure. The stretch burns a little and sparks fly through your body, making your toes curl. At this point you’re far too fucked out to answer his mocking words. 
“I haven’t even put my cock inside you, and you’re already cockdrunk.”
“Shut up.” Your retort comes out weak. You’ll never admit it, but you love it when Suguru is mean to you. It makes slick pool in your panties every time, this time being no exception as your cunt gushes, coating Suguru’s hand and fingers. You’re close.
So close. 
Suguru knows too. His lips curl into a smile, and he thrusts into your hand, hoping to reach his orgasm at the same time as you. You pant and lean in to kiss him. 
“I want to come,” you murmur, your lips ghosting over his.
“Yeah, pretty girl. You wanna come just from my fingers? Make a mess?” 
You glare at him, though Suguru hardly feels threatened. Your hands stroke his cock more diligently before one comes down to fondle his balls, and you run your thumb over his sensitive tip with the other. Suguru’s hips stutter, and his thigh twitches. He can practically taste his orgasm, and he can tell you're tethering on the edge too by the way your walls flutter around his fingers. 
“We’re back!”
You hear the front door open and Satoru’s sing-song voice as he rambles excitedly about the candy he chose. You fly away from Suguru’s lap, immediately tugging his cock into his boxers again, before jumping off his fingers and settling beside him. You adjust your clothes, pulling down your top and putting a blanket over you. 
Suguru blinks. He looks down at his now painful erection before adjusting himself, so it’s harder to tell. He silently thanks himself for wearing black sweats, hiding the wet patch from where you sat just moments ago. 
He looks up at you. You look dishevelled if anything, but you hide it well. His fingers are still covered in your slick, and he keeps eye contact with you as he brings them to his lips and sucks them clean. You gape and shift uncomfortably. He can tell you’re rubbing your thighs together, trying to soothe the ache that you’re no doubt feeling. 
Satoru walks into the living room, holding bags and more bags of sweets. Shoko strolls behind him. 
“I tried to stop him, but it was useless,” she says, motioning to the amount of candy in Satoru’s arms. You giggle, slightly more high-pitched than normal. 
“What movie are we watching?” Shoko asks, plopping down beside you. Satoru grabs the remote and starts talking about a movie he’s been wanting to watch. Suguru pulls at your blanket. You glare at him and Suguru pouts. 
“I’m cold,”
“Find your own blanket.”
“But you have one right there.” 
“There’s not enough for both of us!” You huff, and Suguru sighs, pretending to think. 
“Ah, I have a solution,” he says, promptly grabbing you and pulling you into his lap with your back against his chest. You squeal as Suguru wraps an arm around your waist, keeping you there, while the other adjusts the blanket to cover you. 
Neither Shoko nor Satoru bats an eye, instead arguing about the movie—Shoko thinks Satoru’s pick is stupid and Satoru thinks it’s perfect—leaving you at Suguru’s mercy. You can feel him throbbing against your ass as he pulls out his cock again and slips your pj to the side. You tense, but ease up when Suguru presses a kiss on your shoulder. 
“Relax,” he murmurs. “We’ll just sit like this,” he presses his cockhead against your cunt and pushes in slowly.
“You promised you’d be a good girl right?” You try to keep your face neutral, thankful that neither of your two friends is paying attention.
“Yeah,” you breathe, digging your nails into his arm around your waist. Soon, he’s buried to the hilt. You’re stuffed—stretched obscenely—pussy throbbing and leaking around his pulsing cock. 
Suguru kisses the crown of your head.
“There you go, baby,”
It takes everything in you to relax and rest your head on Suguru. Suguru wraps both arms around you, one slipping under your shirt to squeeze your tit before settling around your waist again. Satoru turns off the lights and starts the movie, all four pairs of eyes settling on the TV screen. 
You take a breath. It’s just two hours. Two hours sat on Suguru’s dizzyingly big cock. You can handle that.
Yeah.
For sure. 
Tumblr media
thank you for reading!
🏷️ tags: @kisstoru @hiraethwrote @interconnectedmatrix @s-vila @gojouology
@kaskc @dearest-yeosang @sebastianlover
masterlist | dividers by me
445 notes · View notes
shadowkoo · 1 day
Text
Almost Home
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
→ Summary: Your boyfriend looks extra yummy when he's in the driver seat, which tends to turn you into a feral, needy animal.
↠ wooyoung x f.reader | 712 words | 18+ ↠ genre: smut, pwp, established relationship
→ Warnings: roadhead, oral (male receiving), ball squeezing, teasing, slightly bratty!reader, cock choking & cock swallowing if you squint lol, praise kink, slight exhibitionism & voyeurism, i think that’s it but let me know if i missed something
→ Networks: @k-vanity @ksmutsociety @pirateeznet @othersideoutlawsnetwork
→ Author Note: just a quick drabble bc i have a looooot of thoughts about the photos woo has been sharing lately ugh, not edited either so yeah...enjoy
Tumblr media
“We’re surrounded by other vehicles right now, you can’t wait?” Wooyoung exasperates, exhaling a breath as your hands slide up his thigh.
“Just drive faster so no one sees me face first in your lap. It’ll be fine,” you shrug nonchalantly.
“But we’ll be home soon,” he points out lamely, trying to distract you - and himself.
You can’t wait though, he looks almost too good. There’s just something about the way he sits in the driver’s seat, exuding confidence and control, both of which have heat pooling in your center. It's the way he owns the space, completely in charge, and it’s making you lose your mind.
“Let me suck you off, please?” you whine. “I’ve missed you, all of you. Especially your pretty dick. I know it missed me too.” You lean over the center console of his car to kiss his neck, letting your hand dip in between his legs to cup his package. He hisses at the initial contact, then melts into your touch. He secretly loves it when you praise any part of him, even if you use the word pretty in the same sentence.
“Baby,” he groans, tipping back against the headrest and swallowing hard.
“I’ll stop if you really want me to,” you say, massaging him through his pants.
“Fuck,” he grips the steering wheel tighter while increasing speed, “Don’t you dare stop.”
Dipping into his pants after undoing them, you free his hardening length from the layers of fabric. You’re mesmerized by the little beads of pre-cum that spill out of his angry tip. Using your thumb, you smear them across his velvety flesh before immediately taking him in your mouth. The head of his length alone is enough to fill your mouth.
Wooyoung’s body stiffens from the sudden contact, and he might have accidentally swerved into the other lane, just for a second, when your teeth graze along the underside of his heavy head.
Christ.
Removing your mouth from him, you kiss every inch of his thickening length, effectively teasing him until more pre-cum leaks from his small hole.
His body reacts with another shudder when your other hand goes lower to cup his balls, your palm tightening around them when you leave another feather-light kiss on the very tip top of his member just to drive him crazy.
“You’re such a brat. Stop teasing and start choking on my cock already,” he grumbles, using his free hand to shove your face back down.
You comply, wrapping your hand around his girth and lowering your mouth around him. Mmm, you definitely missed this.
Hollowing your cheeks, you take him in further and further until your sputtering along his length.
Wooyoung loves the way your mouth stretches to take all of him. If he wasn’t so hyper focused on not crashing the car, he’d fuck the hell out of your mouth right now. He’ll make time for that later, you know, once you make it home.
Coming up for air, you grin toward your boyfriend while a string of saliva falls from your mouth. “I swear I’ll never get enough of this, enough of you,” you moan.
Wooyoung watches intently as you take in his full length again, only breaking eye contact when he needs to check the road.
“Look at you, you’re unreal. Do you know that?” He says, his eyes burning into yours as he looks down at you again. He rubs a fallen piece of hair out of your face. “Just gorgeous.”
His words make your panties wetter than they already are and you squeeze your legs together for some kind of relief.
You continue to play with his balls as you hum around him while he’s deep in your throat, a move you’ve learned that will send him spiraling right over the edge.
A few seconds later, his hips jerk and he twitches inside you. His hot, seedy release shoots down the back of your throat while he lets out the most delicious moan you’ve ever heard.
“Mmm,” you say, licking your lips once you pull yourself off him. “That was fun. Now take me home and dick me down properly as a thank you.”
He shakes his head, the corners of his lips curling into a smile, “As you wish.”
Tumblr media
→ Taglist: @gyupremacy @beomcoups @yoonguurt @sinfullygay
↠ not on the list yet? sign up here!
Tumblr media
©shadowkoo 2024. All rights reserved.
174 notes · View notes
yandere-yearnings · 2 days
Note
*zombie noise* uuurghhhh.. Titties.. Man titties.. My sickness can only be cured if I am able to suck on some man titties 🧟‍♀️
AUUUGgGgGg My aching hands can only be remedied with a dose of squeezing chesticles various times a day 💀💀
nonnie the way i got war flashbacks reading the word chesticles😭💔 i believe this was in reference to this ask so today it's sun's turn to be reduced to an absolute mess🥰 i'm sorry this took so long to get to btw and also that the writing is largely shit, dar has not been vv good at this lately😔
NSFW under the cut!
“You’re being forward,” Sun laughed, bright-eyed, “hard day?”
“Very.” You stressed, leaning into him, finding solace in the softness of his shirt. His calves brushed against your lower back, drawing you between his thighs.
Sun's hands flicked up, fingers pressing to your scalp and massaging gently. Tenderly, to the shell of your ear, he hummed, “anything I can do to make it better?” 
Blinking at his innocent question, you couldn’t help but grin. Your arms stretched to either side of him, caging him all the more across the counter he was sitting on. “I can think of a few,” you whispered, revelling in the little exhale you received in response, “namely…”
“Y/N.”
“These.” You groped his chest with a happy tilt to your head. “They’re there for a reason, right?”
Sun groaned, curling into you to hide his obvious blush. “Not for you to… play with…”
“Why not?” you teased, feeling your neck heat from where he rested against it. “You didn’t have a problem with it last night. You begged me to touch them more actually, don't you remember? Crying so prettily, saying-”
“That’s enough!” He covered your mouth, pushing you slightly with a shaky grip on your shoulder. Red-faced and refusing to meet your gaze, Sun was the perfect picture of adorable. “If it’ll make you feel better, you know-” he paused, getting quieter, “you know I’m yours so… do whatever. Please, just stop embarrassing me.”
“Me? Embarrassing you?” You gasped, ever playful and swooping in to nip his cheek. “I would never.”
“Y/N,” Sun said again, this time whining, “you’re literally doing it right now!” He swatted at you lightly, but your energy was not lost on him, not in the giggle that preceded your pinning him down.
“Well, hello there,” you mumbled, attention completely focused on the expanse of skin exposed to you now that his top had ridden up.
Sun kicked you, half-hearted. “Don’t talk to it.”
“Sorry.” The both of you knew you weren’t sorry at all. Your thumb had already found its home, kissing into the flesh layered above his sternum, tracing the shadows cast.
Sun arched into it, and suddenly, every move you made became weighted.
Muscle beneath fat, driving your digits in until there was no more give, clawing, kneading, feeling his pulse soar — kisses trapped within his ribs that you knew his heart desperately wanted to send your way. How could you call yourself his lover if you didn’t reciprocate?
Saliva dripped, and your tongue followed, laving into cushioned tissue. You could get addicted to the taste of him, to the gasp and coil that brought you even closer. “Does it feel good, baby?” you mouthed around his nipple, relishing in his shiver.
“Good, so good,” Sun whined, breathless, writhing. “Don’t stop.”
“Who’s being forward now?” your teeth sank in, nothing akin to a light bite. “You can’t be giving me mixed signals like this Sun, you were so shy earlier…”
“Sorry,” he cried, “I’m sorry. I’ll be good for you. Please.”
Tears on his lashline when you pulled away. Your palms squeezed his pecs, let the pressure run down his entire body when they trailed to grasp his hips. Sun bit his lips to muffle his sounds, and you undid them with your own. “Tell me then,” you coaxed, “what do you want?”
“Bed.”
“Okay.” You caressed his face, and his turning to nuzzle into it was all you needed to forget about the stress you’d been feeling prior. "Bed," you repeated. "Bed sounds good.”
132 notes · View notes
moonstruckme · 10 hours
Note
7K!!!!!! And a birthday!!!! What a day!!!!!
For the celly can I please request “frozen peas pressed against a fresh bruise” with tasm!peter? Pretty predictable of a pairing but I just love how you write him
What a day indeed!! Thanks for requesting angel
cw: mention of blood, bruises, and general violence (not being inflicted in the scene)
tasm!Peter Parker x fem!reader ♡ 685 words
Peter is lucky you don’t faint at the sight of blood. You tell him as much, which makes him chuckle, which makes you both wince as the cut on his lip reopens. 
He’s blooming with bruises. You can tell they’re going to be bad—they already are bad, but you know they’re going to get worse. You’re doing your best to mitigate the damage with what you have on hand. There’s a slice of plastic-wrapped cheese laid across the less severe bruise on his jaw and a bag of frozen peas pressed as delicately as possible to the darker one across his temple. Peter could probably hold either of these himself, but he’s decided to busy his hands with the edges of your pajama shorts and leave the work of nursing to you. 
“How’d you get this one?” you ask, stroking your thumb close to the one on his temple. 
“Same guy.” Peter’s voice is light, though you can tell he’s hurting by the way he’s barely moving his lips. “I think his main plan was to try to knock me out.” 
You feel your face scrunch, sympathy for your boyfriend and disgust for his attacker warring in you. He coils the drawstring of your shorts around his finger and smiles at you with the working side of his mouth. 
“It didn’t work.” 
“Maybe you should’ve stayed down,” you mumble. 
“That wouldn’t have really been consistent with the whole ‘neighborhood protector’ thing…” 
“Who were you protecting this time, though?” You aim for lightness, but the question falls with unintended weight between you. You rub your lips together, looking at the peas instead of him. “It was a carjacking. I mean, it still sucks, but nobody was being physically hurt except you.” 
“Hey.” Peter’s voice is soft, teasing. He strokes a thumb over your thigh. “You should see the other guy.” 
You expel a breath. It aches a little coming out. “I just…it feels like you put yourself in danger tonight for nothing.” 
You’re still not quite looking at him, but you see his eyebrows scrunch in your periphery. The levity saps from his expression. “Sweetheart, I wasn’t in any real danger. I always make it back, don’t I?” 
“Barely,” you murmur, softer than soft. 
“I’ll be good as new in a couple days,” he assures you. “Super strength and super healing and all that, remember?” 
“I know. It’s scary when you come back like this, though.” 
“Hey.” Peter taps your thigh. You look at him, and he rewards you with a little smile. “It’s not like it happens all the time. These guys were waiting for me. They knew I was coming and they got the jump, but that’s not, like, a regular thing.” 
“I know,” you say again. “I just wish you’d pick your battles sometimes. If no one’s getting hurt, and you are getting hurt, maybe it’s not always worth it. You could at least consider leaving things be some of the time.” You smile back at him, and it’s a bit watery. “The cars will be okay.” 
Peter looks back at you for a minute. You look down, embarrassed—you’re not even the one getting hurt, what right do you have to get all emotional about it?—but you can still feel him studying you. After a while, he says, “Okay.” 
You blink. “Okay?” 
He smiles. Not like he’s consoling you this time, but like he can’t help it. “Yeah, baby. I don’t want to scare you for nothing. So I’ll try” —he sighs— “to pick my battles a little bit. Sometimes.” 
You feel teary again. “Thanks,” you say thinly. 
Peter’s brows hook in the middle, his hand moving up to hold your hip as though to steady you. “Sure,” he says softly. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know it was freaking you out so much.” 
You laugh, shrugging and wiping wetness away from your bottom lashes. He pouts. 
“Kiss?” 
It’s an easy request to oblige. You kiss Peter on his top lip, the good side, but when that’s not enough for him and his bottom lip splits again anyway, he says he doesn’t mind.
115 notes · View notes
yuuuhiii · 2 days
Text
yandere themes, knife usage, mdni
a/n: I need to stop watching Dexter (*´ー`*)
Tumblr media
He loved you so so much. His beautiful bestfriend. You were to good for people, definitely to good for this world. In his eyes, no one was ever perfect for your time.
Nobody deserved it.
Not even him.
But he’d tell himself he was an exception since he was your bestfriend.
You were always nice and gentle to everyone that had the luck of talking to you.
But he hated.
Really hated.
When some morons could think they could have even a chance to be with you. Couldn’t they see that was his spot?
He adored the way you’d reject them, he’d like for you to be more mean but you could never do no wrong. And for the people that could ever mistreat you.
He dealt with them himself.
In the dark of the night, letting you know he’d go get you both snacks and you nodded, a kiss to his warming cheek. He feels the remnants of your lips still on his skin, even when he’s on his way to someone’s house.
It was a guy, someone who thought he could touch what was his. He stops at the end of the street, the guy walking into view.
He knows his routine, where he lives, his name and the best part, how to get in. So before the guy can even make it to his house. He’s settling in, the lights are off and a shot of adrenaline shoots through him when he hears the door unlock.
The guy walks in, unbeknownst of his presence on the couch until he turns the light on. He gasps loudly, almost tripping over his kitchen chair. He turns around from his place on the couch.
“Remember me?” He grins, standing up.
“W-What—Get the fuck out of my house!” The guy yells.
He snickers. “I asked if you remembered me.” He walks over to him. He towers over the guy, a psychotic glint in his eyes it has the guy gulping.
“N-No.” He pouts, placing a hand on his shoulder.
“Let’s try to remember okay? You saw the most beautiful girl today? You had your hands all over her, making her uncomfortable right?”
The guy nods his head. “I-I didn’t know she had a boyfriend.” He laughs, squeezing the guys shoulder.
“It’s nothing like that. I’m just her bestfriend, I gotta protect her from guys like you.”
He forces the guy to sit down on his own chair. He walks over to the kitchen counter, grabbing a knife. The guy squeaks, shivering in his chair.
“She was really scared you know? It hurt me to see her like that. I never wanna see her scared. It also makes me upset because I feel like I’m not doing my job correctly. So that’s why I’m here. To finish it.” He pokes at the end of the knife.
“Y-You’re fucking crazy!”
The guy takes off in a sprint for the front door. Making your bestfriend sigh. He goes after him and the poor guy isn’t even able to open the door before he’s dragging him back from the collar of his shirt.
“Gosh you don’t have to make this hard you know.” He rubs at his forehead.
“I swear! I didn’t mean to make her uncomfortable! She’s just really pretty—” He nodded along as the guy rambled on, dragging the knife along the guys chest.
“I’ve heard this so many times. Why do you guys always try to justify your actions in the end.” He sucks at his teeth.
“You guys always end up the same either ways. Dead.”
The guys plea’s are white noise in his mind as he plunges the knife in him. It’s always in these moments he feels like something takes over and when he snaps out of it, the work is already done.
He spends some time cleaning up the body. His hands his clothes. Making it look like a murder scene. He curses at himself when he sees the missed calls from you. He dials your number and your pretty voice engulfs his ears.
“Hey, where’ve you been.” He could hear your pout across the line making him smile as he makes his way to his car.
“A lot of the convenience stores are closed so I had to go to one far from your house.” He lies through his teeth.
“Oh ok then.” You murmur and he smiles.
“I’ll be right there ok pretty?” You hum and he hangs up.
When he’s finally back with bags of snacks, you cheer.
“Finally! I missed you.” You say as you throw your arms around his neck. You go to kiss his cheek but spot something.
“Hey what is this?” You swipe your thumb over his cheek, it’s a red stain.
“Huh?” He peers down at your thumb and places the bags on the floor. He laughs and you glance at him confused.
“I might’ve had a little snack without you, it’s ketchup.” You whine and push at his chest but he picks you up, letting you squeal as he places you on your bed.
“It’s fine, I got you all your favorites ok.” He leans in, his breath fanning your lips. It makes you gasp and your eyes lid. He pecks the corner of your mouth, getting off of you and grabbing the bags.
You’re left there on your bed a flushing mess as he hums, sorting out the snacks. You chew at your lip and sit next to him.
“Hey I have a question.” He hums, still taking things out.
“H—How come you don’t kiss me?” He faces you but you’re messing with your hands.
“You’re always calling me names and treating me like your girlfriend. You even scare away guys when they come up to me. But we’re still best friends?” He hates how confused you look.
“C’mere.” He pats his lap and you move to straddle him.
“You want me to kiss you?” He tilts his head and you nod.
His lips are on yours and they’re wasting no time. They’re feverish around yours and if the tv wasn’t on you would’ve payed attention to how loud your guys lips smacked against each others. When he inserts his tongue into your mouth you let out a moan, tugging at his hair. He smiles and pulls away.
“You’ve been waiting for this huh?” You nod quickly.
“I was beginning to think you didn’t feel the same way.” You rest your face on his shoulder. He places kisses on your cheek and down to your neck.
“Oh baby, if only you knew how far I’d go for you.”
YUTA OKKOTSU, KAZUTORA HANEMIYA, HARUCHIYO SANZU, Armin Arlert, Vigilante Deku, Hirofumi Yoshida,
Tumblr media
© yuuuhiii 24 : don’t plagiarize, translate, or post my work on other platforms
77 notes · View notes
Text
Red Hot Ghouls 14 part 2/2
Masterpost 
Danny had kind of ignored the most important part of that initial message. Crud. Of course the poor bastard wanted to know about the progress on their spiritual separation. Danny cringed. He typed fast to send a new message before Jason could ask again.
It did not come out easily. He wrote and deleted two drafts before he groaned aloud. “I am not prepared to tell him that the options so far are either to marry and divorce me or to get his ass banished from the ghost dimension.” Danny spent a moment pitying himself. “I just have to say the truth.”
Cringe. Cringe so hard. 
I have two possible solutions but they both suck really hard. :/ Suck so hard you’d be shook. The suckage would change your life.
Jason sent back ellipses. It belatedly occurred to Danny that it might have looked like he was making a blowjob joke. He put the phone back on his chest and stared at the ceiling for a while, wondering why he was this way.
“Jason didn’t see that,” Danny told himself. “Jason is a professional. A professional something. I don't know what.” 
He wanted to believe it so badly that he just decided not to be mortified. Danny lifted the burner phone back up and painstakingly assembled a shrug emoji from symbols. 
Honestly they’re such bad options that I don’t even wanna tell you. Can we change the subject? : (
Jason sent back a series of laughing and crying emojis and then, Fine. Let’s talk about all the other stuff we have in common.
Danny pursed his lips. “...Do we have anything in common?” It wasn’t like he knew much about the guy, but he presumed Jason kept himself busy with some boring adult job, building muscle, and biking around looking hot. Danny crossed his legs at the knee and tried not to think of what a twig he looked like in comparison to Jason. He didn’t feel bad about it, honestly. Danny was too busy to make fitness a part of his personality and he had nothing to prove.
I’m illiterate, he settled on as a response. They definitely did not have a love of literature in common. What else did people do? I uh…. Watched a movie two years back.
Any good?
T’was shit, Danny admitted. Hm. He frowned. “I’m not sure where to take this conversation,” he said aloud.
I’m so hungry. Just got off work and I’m trying to decide what to do.
“Oh, I can do something with that.” Danny felt better. Yeah me too, I would kill for an enchilada. He tried to send a ghost emoji and groaned when he remembered that this was a shitty burner phone with no keyboard downloaded and apparently no access to the app store. Jason had already responded by the time that he gave up.
Ghosts eat Mexican food?
They would if they have human zone money, Danny sent back morosely. Oh no, it wasn’t fun anymore. Ya boy can’t pay in the tears of the damned anywhere on this plane of existence smh. His stomach growled with obnoxious timing. He groaned. The last thing he’d eaten had been that sandwich with Jazz. He could cook… He really should cook. 
Ugh. Effort. 
Danny tried to motivate himself up to the kitchen. “It’s four steps,” he said aloud, trying to be encouraging. “I can make it.”
Ah. No. That was actually kind of depressing. He lived in a shoebox with a monthly grocery budget that was just pitiful.
Haha ur broke, Jason sent, because he was a massive bitch. Danny felt a lot better about flipping him off. But then Jason followed it up with an obviously insincere, I’d get you enchiladas if you were in Gotham. Sucks to suck.
Danny sensed weakness to exploit.
“You’re going to regret that,” Danny grimly promised, and hit the call button.
Jason picked up on the second ring, sounding confused and electronic. “Hey?”
“I can be in Gotham for enchiladas,” Danny threatened. His stomach growled again. “You feeling brave? Huh? Huh?” He punched a finger at the air in accusation. “I’m not scared of you or your dank gargoyles, leatherboy.”
There was a weird mechanical sound. Maybe a snort? A laugh? “I’ll send you a GPS point, if you’re there in ten I’ll buy you all you can eat.”
Danny went still like the predator he was. “Bring your life savings.” He hit the end call button and launched himself off the couch to go stuff his feet into his shoes. He let his apartment door slam shut behind him carelessly. He’d made it to the ground level before the pin point landed.
“Fuck, it’s even in my neighborhood.” Danny laughed, flush with petty victory. He looked left, right, and went invisible before he went ghost. There was no one around at this late hour to see him drop off the visible spectrum.
63 notes · View notes
Text
Through The Portal: Chapter 5
Tumblr media
Series Masterlist
Chapter Summary: Dipper learns more about Bill than what he bargained for. He also gets to know Y/n more than he thought. Stan mulls over his confession. Ford fights his own feelings for Y/n.
Pairing(s): Stan x reader, Ford x reader, Bill x reader, Mabel x friend!reader, Dipper x friend!reader
Warnings: Angst, Fluff, mentions of torture, PTSD, unrequited love, flashbacks, mentions of hopelessness.
A/N: The events and ideas are based on a theory I have about the Nightmare Realm. This is in no way canonically true, just my theories based on what we canonically know about the Nightmare Realm.
Dipper’s eyes widened at my words as I stated that Stan once lived with me. I no longer wanted to hide my past from the kids anymore, either way, they were going to find out. I had started to grow close with them and I felt terrible about hiding things from them. Having to tip-toe around their questions.
“How is that possible? Y-you look so young!?” Dipper pointed out.
“I may look young, Dipper, but where I was before I came out of the portal, time and gravity had no laws. Anything was possible. I’m actually around the same age as Ford and Stan, believe it or not.”
Dipper sat there with his jaw slacked, his mind filled with questions as they overlapped each other. I knew it was hard for him to wrap his mind around the thought I was the same age as his uncles. He sat there as his thoughts encouraged me to continue.
“After Stan was kicked out, I found him wandering the beach. He told me he was just living in his car and under good conscience I could not let him do that knowing I had a place for him. We grew close quickly. Then, when I got closer to getting what Bill wanted, I started pushing Stan away. Until, one day I was readying the machine for testing and got sucked inside. I had unspoken things I never got to tell Stan, and he did as well. He was angry he had no idea what happened to me.”
I was getting closer and closer to finally having everything I could ever ask for. Once my portal had passed the testing phase, I could finally give Stan everything he could ever want. I worked tirelessly on the machine, time passing as I became unaware of it.
“Y/n?” Stan’s voice echoed through the stairwell of the basement.
“Stan, what is it?”
“I made you dinner, it’s on the table if you want it.”
“Thanks. I’ll be up later to get it.”
“Y/n, what could possibly be so important down there that you can’t even walk up to get food?” Stan’s voice was concerned and worried.
I sigh, and stop what I’m doing. I head to the stairs where Stan is waiting at the top. I give him a soft smile as I make my way up to meet him. He gave a soft smile back as I met him at the landing.
“Okay. I’m sorry. I’m just trying to finish this project in time.”
“It’s okay, toots. I get it, but I want you to take care of yourself too.” Stan’s thumb rubbed my cheek bone gently.
I giggle and lean into his gentle touch. He was always so sweet to me, and I had to confess that I was growing more and more fond of him. Once I was finished with this invention, I wanted to dedicate the rest of my life to being with him.
“Growing close to him, aren’t we?” Bill’s voice echoed through my mind, “would be a shame if anything happened to him, wouldn’t it?”
“You wouldn’t dare!” I thought as Stan and I walked to the table.
“Get back to work, and I won’t hurt him. Besides, what happened to being mine? I don’t like sharing what’s mine!”
“Okay, okay. I’ll get back to work.”
“That’s my good girl.”
“I-I need to get back to work.” I state, grabbing my plate and rushing back downstairs, leaving Stan to wonder what just happened.
I worked harder than ever. Bill, peering over my shoulder now more than ever. He wanted to make sure I finished on time. Finally, the day came to prepare for testing, but something went wrong. I must have miscalculated as the gravity of the portal pulled me in. I gripped onto anything I could hold onto, but it was no use. I slowly slipped into the portal vanishing without a trace. I left Stan with so many questions, and an unspoken confession hanging on his mind.
“S-so Stan never knew what happened to you?” Dipper questioned softly.
I shook my head, “he must have thought I ran out on him. The last conversation I had with him, I bolted back to the basement as quickly as he got me out of there. Bill, he had a tight leash on me…he was obsessed.”
“D-do you know Ford’s connection with Bill?” Dipper asked, looking at a sleeping Ford.
“I don’t, sadly. He never shared that with me. He quickly found out mine, but it was hard to tell the connection he had.”
“Wh-what if we found out? Using this?” Dipper pointed to the helmet he was wearing that was reading his thoughts. 
His thoughts stated that there would be no harm, and we could help better. I took a deep breath and nodded in agreement. There was no harm, and Dipper then could help us defeat him. Dipper took the helmet off his head and walked over to Ford and placed it on Ford’s.
“Just a little peek. What are you hiding about Bill?” Dipper stated as he watched Ford’s thoughts appear on the screens.
Soon Bill’s image popped on the screen. His evil laugh echoed through the room. My body shivered hearing his laugh. I hated him so much, the things he did to me while laughing with that evil laugh of his.
More memories popped up. A new voice, one that belonged with whom I assumed was his assistant, and then Stan’s voice echoed through the room. Then Bill popped up again.
“He would trick or possess anyone,” Ford popped up, then a younger version of Ford popped up, “then it’s a deal, from now to the end of time.” He reached his hand out for a handshake.
Then Bill popped up again, his outstretched hand glowing with blue flames, “just let me into your mind Stanford.”
Their hands connected and shook as Ford spoke, “please, call me a friend.” Ford’s face appeared with Bill’s eyes, their voices intertwined as they laughed. I grew scared, was it possible for Bill to still have access to Ford's mind? “Ford and Bill!?” Dipper questioned in shock.
We turned around as Ford stood up. His eyes weren’t visible to us. I grew terrified as I realized that maybe Bill did still have access to Ford’s mind. Maybe that’s why he refused to erase my memory the other day. I had seeked refuge with someone still close to Bill, and that made me sick to my stomach.
“You shouldn’t have done that.” Ford spoke.
Dipper and I slowly back up. Ford takes the helmet off, throwing it on the ground and reveals his shrine of Bill. My eyes prick with tears as I grow terrified.
“Why were you shaking hands with Bill? You said Bill could possess anyone so he could get this!” Dipper grabs the rift, almost dropping it.
“Careful! Hand me the rift. Now boy!” Ford shouts.
I place a protective hand on Dipper’s shoulder as we slowly back up as Ford walks towards us. I was in a state of fear. I felt like the room was slowly morphing around me. Keeping a hand on Dipper kept me somewhat grounded in reality.
“Why are you really scanning my thoughts?” Dipper grabs the memory gun, “are you Bill right now?”
“Now just-just calm down, p…”
“Pine tree! Is that what you were going to call me!?” Dipper kept the memory gun pointed at Ford as we were backed up into the computer screens.
“I was going to say please, kid!”
“Great Uncle Ford told us to protect the rift! Get one step closer and I’ll shoot. I’ll erase you right out of Ford’s head!” Dipper’s voice kept my mind from slipping away from reality. I felt my legs trying to buckle at the thought that Bill could be possessing Ford right now. I wasn’t prepared to face him yet.
“It’s me Dipper! It’s your uncle! Y/n, sweetheart, help me out here?”
“Get out of Ford’s mind you triangular demon!” I screamed, Ford never allied me sweetheart, that was Bill talking, tears streamed down my face slowly as I looked away.
“Trust no one, trust no one. Trust..” Dipper heard my fear, and started to pull the trigger.
“Hand it to me!”
Dipper pulled the trigger of the memory gun. The beam bounced around the room, as we all ducked. My legs gave out as I no longer felt like I had a grip on reality. Ford picked Dipper up by his vest and adjusted his glasses. It was truly Ford standing there. It was too late for my mind to rationalize that now.
The world around me was morphing. The room slowly turned into the Nightmare realm as I slowly began to hear that evil laugh. I covered my ears as tears streamed down my face. I felt a pair of arms lift me up gently and Ford’s calming voice spoke.
“Bill’s gone. He can’t hurt you anymore. You’re safe with me dear.”
I started to calm down as my eyes opened slowly. I was no longer in the basement. I was in the room I had been staying in. Both Ford and Stan were standing there looking concerned. My eyes were still wet with tears as I slowly realized where I was.
“Hey ya, toots.” Stan spoke softly as my eyes landed on him.
Ford’s gaze turned from me to Stan as he spoke, “she’s been through a lot when she was in that portal, Stanley. This was the worst state I’ve seen her in.”
“Are you two going to tell me, or am I gonna be left in the dark here?” Stan looked at Ford with a stern look.
“She went through a lot that has caused trauma, post traumatic stress if you will. Her state of mind is always so fragile afterwards. The only way I’ve been able to get her out is to whisper that he’s gone, and she is safe.” Ford explained.
Stan came and sat down next to me, pulling me close, “I’m so sorry. I had no idea you had really been through so much.”
I curled into Stan, wanting anything to keep my mind from slipping back again. He cradled me gently, holding me there for as long as I needed him to. I had never realized the effect Bill truly had on me, but being in Stan’s arms made me feel a comfort I hadn’t known for a very long time.
“Th-thank you. Both of you.” I finally spoke up, my voice soft and hoarse. I must have been screaming.
“No need, toots. I’ve got you. I’ll always have you. No matter what.” I felt comforted by his words, but what he said next had my mind whirling, “I love you Y/n.”
31 notes · View notes
hoshizoralone · 1 year
Note
How did you first get into Nier? And who is your favorite character(s) in each game?
was over at a friend’s house early summer in 2016 and they asked “do you want to play a game about a hot single dad” and that’s how it all started.
my favs are dad nier, yonah, weiss, a2, and 6o :) here is a bad picture of my dad nier shrine on my bookshelf
Tumblr media
47 notes · View notes
songtwo · 7 months
Text
idk i think my bf might be developing a drinking problem and i just don’t know what to do…..
#it’s been going on for a couple of months now but he promised he would stop and he had been doing well until today….#and it’s like. on one hand i never wanted to be w an alcoholic and i told him straight so he promised it would stop#but on the other hand i can’t just abandon him#and it’s like we used to go out a lot and party but like. that was it but ever since he met this guy he just gets lost when he drinks w him#and the thing was he got like aggressive like he didn’t do anything to me and i can’t really explain it but he just wasn’t himself#and like. we talked about it a million times and it’s not like it happens every week#it’s been like 5 times since december#but 3 have been on the past month alone#and two weeks ago it got bad like he almost got into an accident#and like i’m not even physically w him anymore like we really only see each other once a week since i moved#and from the very first time it happened i told him i couldn’t be w him if it kept happening#and after that incident two weeks ago he swore it was the last time but it just happened again#by the way he and that guy get wasted it really is a miracle they get home alive#and like. idk what to do#i really don’t want to be w someone like this#and i hate feeling like this like if i were to think only about myself i don’t want this i hate feeling like this#but i also can’t abandon him#like not even bc i would miss him or whatever i just wouldn’t feel good leaving him alone#but like i don’t want to live like this#maybe i’ll ask for some time to just figure things out#but it’s gonna suck so bad bc we were supposed to see kendrick lamar next week and then we already had plans for his bday and omfg#i don’t wanna leave but i don’t want things to be like this either#and i asked him to stop and gave him multiple chances but idk#i just don’t know what to do#i love him endlessly but i need to put myself first but i can’t abandon him:(#and our 1.5 anniversary was also next week…..#but i think time is the sanest and safest thing right now
8 notes · View notes
eighteenoheight · 5 months
Text
Tumblr media
Unpopular opinion but I actually like Jessica’s diver outfit. I think it’s camp and tacky which is very much her personality. The one leg and the high heels are so stupid I can’t help but love it.
3 notes · View notes
Text
i feel like i’m wasting my time on schoolwork that i ultimately don’t care about when i could be taking pictures of bugs and drawing yaoi and discussing what kind of lingerie light yagami would like based on his sense of fashion and personality
#like idgaf abt any of this shit rn. i was academia brained for like 16 years give me a fucking break#ik i’m planning to start my masters right after i graduate but honestly i need a break i want to yaoi for some time#unforch that cannot happen bc i am on an invisible timer that says if i don’t speedrun everything in life i will die which i have always#felt since i was young#this could be the result of untreated anxiety tbh but who cares#anyway i went outside to see the fireflies and i was like i’m going to cry i never get to go outside bc i’m busy w school and if i do#go outside to have fun i know i’ll be more stressed bc now i have less time to do school idk man. it’s making me sick i’m so stressed#w school and home and my family and needing to do things and not being built for living under capitalism and shit and it sucks#and i just want to take pictures and talk abt things i like and not have to worry abt shit but life sucks so whatever#i just feel like i’m wasting time doing things i don’t care abt when i could be doing literally anything else#like i already spent so so many fucking years of my life depressed or socially isolated and it fucked me up and is still fucking me up#like i haven’t talked to anyone outside of my immediate family in months and my ocd makes life so hard and my family makes it harder#and i feel like i’m just stuck here and will never be truly happy and that i’ve wasted so much of my life being miserable and that i’m#running out of time and spending it all doing shit i don’t even care about and for what reason#idk. i’m tired so i’m probs not making sense but i’m just. not happy with how my life is and idk if i will be for a long time or if i’ll#ever make it far enough to be happy u know
4 notes · View notes
joskippy · 6 months
Text
I hope the amount of research I have to do for c:u! shows because it’s the most frustrating aspect of this project LOL
3 notes · View notes
pallases · 6 months
Text
ourgejjg
#i am feeling so ill rn for no reason and i need to shower and wash my hair so bad but i can tell if i do it rn it’ll make the#lightheadedness ten times worse and there is a nonzero chance i will just pass out in there 😭#best guess is bc my period started today and yeah the first two days suck but they’re not usually This bad#personal#also this is the last thing i need rn it’s tech week and all rehearsals lately have been going/are going to go till 10 pm and i have no tim#to do all my assignments and my probability prof assigned a lab today that’s due TMRW AT MIDNIGHT? <- we usually get a class period btwn#it being assigned and the deadline and he’s not even giving us until the next class period to do it now like why is it due at midnight#instead of noon the next day… also i have not one but two exams immediately following this weekend and i really want to see my family for#easter but that sounds like such a bad idea im so unproductive at home and i’ll be busier than usual when i go home on top of that bc easte#and one of the exams is circuits for which exams are worth 90% of our grade and im averaging a 74% at the moment which is NOT#promising and. AAAAA#also have an exam this thursday which imnot nearly as worried abt but still. and i have to meet w someone abt a scholarship tmrw during my#free period so i Still can’t work on that stupid lab due tmrw night like. this sucks okay ‼️#the engineering chronicles#the music chronicles#i know it was only a matter of time before musical started stressing me out but 😭 please give me back the joys of saturday’s rehearsal…#oh also there’s ANOTHER probability lab due day after easter and same day as circuits exam and the prof is the same so he knows full well#what he’s doing like. why are you not giving us the usual period in btwn for these anymore fuck you <3#OH ALSO soldering qualification i need to do for like 3 hours wednesday the night before my thursday exam. nearly forgot abt that one i hat#it hereeee#soldering i could reschedule tho which i might do. but ive already pushed it back once so im like :/ do i really wanna do that#idk. still feel sick as fuck and still need to do physics prelab tonight 😭 it shouldn’t take long but i really don’t want to get up and#stare at my computer even more ifeel so awful rn#ANYWAY. sorry that was oversharing even for me i am just 😐 you know.
3 notes · View notes
skhardwarevers1 · 9 months
Text
I love running so much. Like it’s not complicated you don’t need to be good at it you don’t need to go out and buy xyz beforehand. You don’t even need fancy running shoes really if you’re just running on your own. All it is is just “can I run? Do I want to run?” And if the answers are yes then you can just go out and run! You don’t have to be the fastest person in the world. There’s no standard. You don’t have to run a sub 25 5k or anything you just go out and put one foot in front of the other and enjoy it. Running is literally the best more people should do it
3 notes · View notes
pepprs · 2 years
Text
crying again lol ok
#purrs#and posting online abt it so i get immediate validation / support instead of asking for help from anyone im close to i know. but god fucking#damn it to hell. ok im going to be candid about this because it hurts so fucking bad. five years ago i met someone so important to me. and I#miss her so so so so much. and every space here i have a memory with her in. and she left in July and she’s gone. and im sobbing my eyes out#FOR WHY because it was over 6 months ago and im happier and she’s happier and we’re all happier. but i think im getting some aftershocks#being here for the first time without her exactly 5 years to the week we met: when she was so important to me. she was the whole reason i#even saw myself as something. and she’s fucking gone. she left. but she’s not dead like LMAO idk why im crying so hard when i could just#text her any time and tell her that i miss her. but idk. it’s just everything is stirring memories and they’re painful to think about now or#at least today because she’s gone and it all changed. i was just saying that i feel like im not having any emotions and tonight the grief ju#just rammed into me like a train and my fucking counselor sucks ass and won’t even help me work through it and everyone is busy and tired an#and im a staff coach so im not supposed to be having a fuckjng mental breakdown over **** pacing around in my bathroom at 1:23am but ive be#been thinking about her so much and remembering all the formative interactions i had with her here and missing her so much i want to explode#and die and p*ke and whatever. so stupid to cry about it but i fucking miss her. and i hate that she’s not here. and i’m trying so hard to b#be her but i have to be me but i can’t not have what she brought here and im just crashi ng and burning and can’t be honest and im having a#breakdown and crying so hard and i don’t know what to do. i ithink i’ll be fine after some sleep and reflection but my heart is like seizing#on itself right now and nothing takes my mind off it and i just keep crying LMFAOOOOOO. i hate it here#delete later#like how can you look at me like that and then fuck off to ****** 4.5 years later. you know? im about to punch a hole into the hallway#and i have to be quiet bc ppl are trying to sleep but it’s making me fucking crazy.#retreat tag
19 notes · View notes
void-tiger · 1 year
Text
Well…if there’s one (1) good thing about having a crush, it’s that when I’m (for the moment anyway) not worrying about the other person’s boundaries and terror about whether I’ve stomped on them or not + my own frustration at how slow things are to just communicate verbally and directly instead of constantly dancing around nonverbal reads (that are two-way, I suppose but still no substitute, can still mean just about anything)…
…yeah. I do let myself be selfish. Acknowledge what I want instead of burying it so deeply away from my consciousness to not “take up space” I suppose. Finally give myself some damn permission to fall in love with another person “despite” being ace, and “despite” being chronically ill and struggling with my mental health.
And what is it I want?
To feel cared for. Cherished. By someone here. To wake up and have someone greet me with a gentle embrace mindful of the constant chronic pain especially in the mornings to not accidentally pinch things, but not treating me like glass, either. To be given autonomy instead of having it taken away—to do things together, FUN things, without being made to feel guilty about that “taking away” spoons from chores or “well why won’t you just work a job then!” but also respecting my need to rest periodically or take a longer rest after the fact.
To feel heard. To trust that there’s love enough for us to disagree and feel angry and frustrated and sad around eachother and with eachother without judgement, without the risk that things are forever one disagreement or misunderstanding away from falling apart completely or worse.
And please tease me. Teasing is a love language just as much as communication and encouragement and acts of service and finally being held. It’s verbal play, and I trust you to not bully me.
And…I’ve shown as much as I can, I think. I know you’re trying to mirror at least some of it. And I think I’m reading you correctly, but I wish I understood why you seem so terrified to talk directly to me.
#tiger’s musing#screw it. ‘don’t say i’m in love’ or whatever#and well. it will fade eventually. and I am very practiced at Behaving and keeping my feelings to myself#legit always have to do that the very few times I’m liked someone This Ain’t ‘Just’ Platonic Is It#because…guess what. the other person’s comfort and boundaries matters more to me#and friendships aren’t a ‘consolation prize.’ they’re the Good Shit#it’s…just that much harder when there isn’t that Direct Communication With Frequency for me#…bUT!! if he didn’t like me…why does he keep looking at me Like That?!#…right. hang in there for a few more weeks. I did hand over a script as..#…yeah. wonder if he realized /he’s/ the reason I finally found my nerve to write it the way I want#and for all my current ‘will you just RELAX and TALK to me yET?!’ frustration? he’s my muse for joseph!#I needed to see what a GOOD man even remotely looks like just as much as I needed someone like him#to accidentally or intentionally show interest (look. if ya gripe about wanting to do something. PUBLICALLY#(and it’s within my skills to make it available. guess what. I’m gonna call your bluff#(I’m too much of a writer and actress. if I see Checkov’s Gun I’m firing it!)#…does he realize that I basically told everyone off for pressuring him via social media and semi privately?#that the only reason why I started using facebook again was to get people to leave him alone?#(who knows. but that + him…kinda witnessing just How Bad my mental health is? is…when I think there was a turning point. maybe. probably.)#…I suck at socializing in Initial Stages. so much. it’s so uncomfortable#but…screw it. I’ve learned that I’ll use what power I have to change environments and make opportunities#even when it’s (deeply) uncomfortable for me to do so#…because sometimes you gotta blink first to make someone else feel safe. and hopefully latch onto that#and…yeah. guess I am patient. but also griping the entire time
3 notes · View notes