#but it feels rather certain at this point
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And here I am in the middle, lmao
If you’re A) keeping your sexual preferences within the confines of marriage, B) treating them with an appropriate amount of privacy and C) not fixating on them to the point of making them a part of your identity, what’s the big deal?
Like maybe there’s something to be said about certain kinks. Incest seems like something that you should probably avoid nurturing, for instance, because it has the potential to develop into something actionable, which is obviously pretty bad. But radfems and tradcaths alike get absolutely mortified at even mild bondage. Which is odd because it’s generally considered to be a pretty regimented system, with more defined rules that the community is pretty stern about enforcing. I can only imagine that it’s so loathed because it’s aesthetically transgressive, even if the actual activities taking place don’t seem to cause any long-term harm to the participants.
Things aren’t sins just because they’re bad in and of themselves. They’re sins because they lead to some negative outcome or wear down a part of one’s character and enable destructive actions down the road. What I understand of human sexuality is that it can be quite the jumble of random garbage that is often sequestered from the rest of your brain. Unlike what all those crime shows tell us, weird kinks won’t transform you into a serial killer.
If you think that excessive attention to sex is problematic and that kinks enable that… well okay, but the animalistic grasp of human libido is something that many, many people are going to succumb to. For myself, I’d rather look to satisfy it in a way that’s ultimately constructive rather than to pretend it doesn’t exist (unfulfilled sexual desires tend to create depression and angst that will harm your effectiveness as a human being.)
But really, I can mostly just offer my gut feelings. And neither above perspective sits entirely right with me. Something is missing and I’m still not sure what that unifying element is.
Enough psychoanalysing why people have kinks. We need to psycholanalyse why they don't. Like you don't enjoy getting tied up? Clearly your tumultuous upbringing has given you a patholgical need to be in control at all times. Don't like fauxcest? That's because your petite-bourgeois class background means you view the nuclear family as a pure and sacred institution, automatically reviling anything that undermines or subverts this. Not into piss? That's easy; you're scared of the piss gnomes
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Melting Glaciers
Because the universe is unfair, it gives Derek Hale a kitten. One that is just as black as his wolf fur, and just as scary looking until you manage to get close to her by a painstakingly long process of trust exercises and find that oh, she's the most adorable thing in the world, too.
See, Stiles is a realist. When constant skirmishes with one certain older werewolfman, where his life was equally threatened and saved by this said werewolfman, made his little Stiles happy to the point of constant little deaths in the not-so-privacy of his bedroom, he'd choked down the realization of not being so straight as he'd mistakenly thought. At the time, the sorrow of it had more to do with the fact that his crushes were always so unattainable rather than the fact that it was a man he was crushing on, one that his dad had arrested too. And then when his dad was brought into the fold of the hidden layer in their world, and he saw his dad recognize the real Derek, he knew he had his dad's permission.
His dad's always been a realist, too. Stiles' affection is anything but secret when it comes to Derek, because he deserves all the good things in the world, and despite his design to push and prod until the person Stiles is talking to comes undone and shares their secrets, Stiles has done anything but that with him. In the beginning, it was curiousity. It was his desire to know the unknown, to gather all the facts, to know enough to get over Derek Fuckin' Hale. Somewhere down the line, but very close to beginning, his feelings turned warmer, though. Glacier of ice melting into rivulets of water, carried away on a sea of emotions he'd denied himself to dip toes in for far too long.
And now that Derek's brought home a kitten he found abandoned near the Walmart, and named her Princess of all things, Stiles has been forced to take a fucking dive into that sea.
He makes a choked off sound when Derek, in the middle of the Loft, takes off his soft-looking, cozy green henley, and Stiles is assualted with the very vivid view of his gorgeous abs.
Derek opens his arms and Princess, deeming it her cue, climbs atop him, her little claws her little helpers, and Derek's enchanting smile Stiles' doom. Once she's nestled against his chest, he looks at Stiles. Another sound falls from Stiles' mouth, without his permission. It's a whine, he thinks; a call for help.
"You okay?"
O-K-A-Y. Four letter word, where sometimes the last two alphabets are unnecessary. Just like this question.
"What do you think!" Oh no. He needs to calm down. Princess is looking at him, her green eyes wide and anxious. Stiles whispers, hisses really, "Her! You! Henley!"
Derek looks at his little princess, then looks back at him. "You are not making sense, Stiles." Looks back at Princess, says, "Your Tata is acting crazy." Princess meows, as if in agreement, and oh fuck, seriously universe? Why should Derek look so damned adorable when he's just paying attention to his kitten like many others do! Hell, Peter was doing the same thing in the last pack meeting, and Stiles had thought nothing of it. But Derek does it, and it's like Stiles has discovered a whole new world of kinks. What the hell.
During Stiles' inner freakout, Derek has managed to sit on the couch, and now he's petting Princess, who is still attached to his chest like a barnacle. Why isn't Stiles a kitten?
Wait.
"DID YOU JUST ME CALL ME HER TATA?!"
Princess hisses quite venomously at him, probably at the volume of his voice, because Derek winces too. Oops. But no, not oops!
This is serious business.
He points a finger at Princess. "Don't talk to me like that young lady," he waggles his finger for emphasis. She follows it with her eyes, looks at Derek once, then settles down and watches him with wide, unblinking eyes. What an attitude on this one. Just like her dad, really. Who is... looking at him, the corner of his lips tilted up in amusement. "You. Words. Explain."
"Words are usually his thing," Derek tells Princess, who meows once in acknowledgment. Then he lifts his eyes towards Stiles and pats the free seat beside him. Stiles sits. "I am more of an action person."
And then Derek takes Stiles' hand and puts it on top of his other one, the one Derek's been using to constantly pet Princess. Stiles' breath stops for a moment at the touch.
"Is this okay?"
"More than," Stiles admits, and watches with awe as Derek's eye sparkle under the waning sunlight, the way his mouth stretches further up into a grin, unabashed and unbelievably pretty this close up. Stiles forms a grin in response too. "So," he says, playfulness creeping away the shock. "Since I am her Tata... I vote to name her Princess Leia."
Derek's laughter in response echoes through the Loft, and Princess makes her displeasure known at the vibrations on her comfy spot by jumping onto Stiles' chest. They remove their hands at the movement, and Stiles puts his hands back on her, lets her burrow in his chest. She's already in his heart, anyways.
"Stiles," Derek says when he's calmed down, only a minute later. Stiles isn't even offended; The sound of Derek's laughter is like eating candy. Like pure bliss. "That's already her name."
Stiles blinks.
Derek calls, "Leia, come to dad," and she goes.
"I love you so, so, so much, you don't even know, Derek Hale," the words come out, and he... is not afraid they're out there, because Derek has, once again, Princess Leia on his chest, and his left arm comes around Stiles' shoulders to pull him in towards himself.
Derek kisses the top of his head, and Stiles melts, and he is a realist, so when Derek replies, "I love you, too, so, so, so much," he knows he's done for life.
Stiles' heart will belong to no other, but Derek Hale.
As if reading his thoughts, Princess Leia meows, and Stiles amends his mental declaration: his heart will belong to no other, but Derek Hale, and the family they create.
#sterek#teen wolf#derek hale#stiles stilinski#sterek fic recs#*sterek fic recs#derek hale adopts a kitten#sh.writesonmain
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Quote from a post: "the things created within fandom aren’t real - an individual fic can’t cause actual, material harm to a reader, even if it contains tropes that would be harmful or distressing if they happened in that reader’s real life; an author’s use of certain tropes or interest in certain characters is not indicative of their actual morals and values in real life; thought crimes are not real crimes - but fanfiction is produced by human beings who are themselves products of the societies and communities in which we all live, and these societies and communities all have flaws and failings.
which is to say, those of us who prefer to read male friendships as romantic do need to be aware that, no matter how enlightened on gender and its foibles we think ourselves to be, we are nonetheless influenced as modern humans by a modern tendency to discourage platonic physical and emotional closeness between men - especially straight men - on the grounds that two men having this sort of relationship is inherently queer and, in being queer, implicitly sexual [an understanding of queerness which is another powerful societal influence on our thought, even if we know we don’t agree with it.]"
Okay this is from a big post from a big fandom account here please don't speculate who it is this is not about them specifically and has nothing to do with them i genuinely respect this poster and they are nothing but a supportive space and don't have any anti-nonsense. But I wanna talk about this point that they are making "the society is queering straight friendships" which is something also the anti-fujoshi crowd is saying and honestly I can't agree with that point.
I don't think its us the people who make fandom are queering the relationships between two straight men but the patriarchal system we live under and straight men themselves are doing it to themselves. They can't show love and affection to each other lest other dudes will call them gay not because there are secret fujoshis around that sexualize them. They can be vulnerable period lest everyone calls them whiney like women. I feel like (and most of the things I say here are vibes, not facts) men having close friendships with other men are green flags, and most women are excited to see men who have exact the strong relationship that are portrayed in media.
I'm confused by this talking point to be honest. I also understand that by saying everything I said above I sort of said the same thing as the original poster. In a sense that society is the problem here and we live in a society as we know, but... idk I feel like what they say is "we live in a society where everyone by default is sexualizing male friendships" which sounds like the standard anti-fujoshi talking point to me.
And regarding the point of romantic relationships being prioritized over platonic— I feel like is a complete bullshit to be honest.
Romantic relationships are prioritized over platonic ones across the board. Straight couples leave their straight friends behind when they get further into relationship too! I don't understand this impulse to constantly talk about romantic vs platonic thing when its about queer ships, and maybe there is somewhere straight ship discourse about romantic vs plantonic but its not as big as with mlm or wlw ships.
And honestly even with this take I feel like romantic relationships are also not prioritized but rather are more encouraged. And there is difference between encouraging and actually prioritizing I think.
(I want to add here that I'm not aroace so maybe its a blindspot and from that identitys point of view the dynamics might be different)
In reality I think both are equally hard to obtain and maintain. I always felt like the fandom being so shipping focused was not about people being hellbent on romance but just the fact that good love stories are few and far between both in fiction and IRL and we can't help but try to make something at least remotely good, or interesting or satisfying.
Again, my main problems is: 1) I don't agree that romantic relationships are prioritized to that high degree over the friendships like everyone claims. 2) I don't think that every single person is actually a secret fujoshi waiting to make any straight male friendship gay. 3) Fandoms are romantic ship centric because people just want more narratively satisfying romantic stories that are underrepresented in media (or they don't get to experience it IRL) rather than they are vehemently against platonic ships.
I don't know this hopefully came out coherent.
--
The person who wrote that sounds like a pretentious twatwaffle, and I am so sick of seeing otherwise reasonable people spout that crap. That's been true since the 90s and probably before.
The reality is that Western culture enshrines male friendship as the highest form of affection possible. This goes back to the Classical world. And, yes, they were probably fucking too back then, but the thing that all of the media is about is friendship.
The entire backbone of Western culture is built on the idea that men are spiritually, biologically, inherently more capable than women of this highest form of relationship. Romance is the big thing for women because we're not eligible for The Pure And Holy Friendship Between Two Men.
The epidemic of male loneliness is real, but we haven't gotten any less "Bros before hos". Fandom and m/m shipping behavior are irrelevant to this.
--
Furthermore, fandom has plenty of people who don't focus on shipping.
AO3 was built by slashers, so ship type is a top-level category, and the site obviously signals that it's about shipping and particularly non heterosexual shipping since you can filter out het.
Past sites often had more metadata that wasn't around ships (e.g. FFN's genres that work like bookstore genres) and almost never let you get rid of het. You might have been able to filter in The Gay, but straight stuff was literally unmarked.
~We do need to be aware of~
Bite me.
This naggy phrase is everywhere, and nothing good comes of it.
The only thing we need to be aware of is that Blorbo is great and s/he should be mashed together with Other Blorbo. If that's in gen adventures, you do you.
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I have a simple thought
Tav making or trying to make Gale fail No Nut November
Woof-
Dearest Anon, I am giving you the most enthusiastic high-five right now. 🙌💯💯💯
Not only because this ask is magnificent, and not only because I squealed when I read it, but because you sent it to me at 10:28pm on November 1st.
Anon, the fact that you couldn’t even last 24 hours into No Nut November before sending in an ask about No Nut November is absolutely perfect. And do you know why?
Because being unable to last 24 hours into No Nut November is exactly what would happen to Gale.
Truthfully, the hardest part of this ask was coming up with why in the hells Gale would ever agree to participate in NNN in the first place. In fact, I think he would be positively incensed at the very idea: “…an entire MONTH of abstaining from pleasures of the flesh?! Simply to prove that it can be done?! Well! I could chop off an arm and cast spells one-handed to prove that it could be done, but it’s hardly something I’d willingly partake in!”
However! For the sake of this fantastic ask, we’ll say that he was convinced and agreed to try.
But the real crux of the matter, and your actual question, is what Tav would do about this situation. And the truth is, I really don’t think Tav would even have to try hard (or uh…at all) to make Gale fail at NNN.
Picture this series of events with me, anon:
Gale waking up with Tav in his arms (or he in theirs)
Drinking in the sight of his beloved as he does every morning
Noticing that Tav’s nightshirt is unlaced, their shoulder and chest uncovered and in full view
Their leg draped over his, thigh fully exposed
Gale already uncomfortably hard due to it being the morning
Tav innocently shifting and repositioning themselves to snuggle closer, their leg brushing over his bulge
Gale doing everything in his power not to audibly moan, thoughts flooding his mind of how they’d made love in the morning just a few days past. Remembering Tav pulling him from sleep by riding him as though their life depended on it. Thinking of Tav’s thighs clamping around his midsection, and then around his head, the taste of Tav on his tongue as he—
Gale not rolling out of bed so much as falling out of it.
Apologizing profusely, frantically getting dressed in his teaching robes, giving Tav a chaste kiss on the forehead, and all but running out the door
Tav joining Gale for lunch at the Academy as usual
The faculty lounge being so crowded that Tav has to sit on Gale’s lap
Beads of sweat forming on Gale’s forehead as Tav blithely chats with the other Professors
Gale trying not to think about Tav’s perfectly shaped ass
Gale trying not to think about how good it feels pressed against him
Gale trying not to think, period
Fumbling or dropping his fork every time Tav shifts slightly
Apologizing for his clumsiness to the point of babbling, even as Tav reassures him it’s fine. Tav finally just putting their finger over Gale’s lips to get him to stop
It taking every ounce of willpower for Gale to not take Tav’s finger in his mouth
Lunch ending with Gale looking as flushed and sweaty as if he’d just ran a marathon rather than sat for 45 minutes
Tav asking him if he’s okay and Gale reassuring them that he’s fine
Grateful that they cannot see his orb scar through his thick teaching robes, certain it is glowing blindingly bright purple
Kissing Tav goodbye, this time on the lips. Instantly realizing his mistake as the thought occurs to him that he could just dimension door them both into his private office, and—
Hastily breaking the kiss and telling Tav he hopes they have a good afternoon, he’ll see them this evening, he loves them
Spending the rest of the afternoon steeling his resolve
Barely able to pay attention to his class
Muttering to himself that it’s just 30 days! Surely that is surmountable! His bond with Tav is incomparable, they are tethered at the soul, their love goes beyond just the physical, even if that aspect is magnificent and life-giving and—
Ending class early when he realizes he’s mistakenly conjured Tav’s likeness when he was supposed to be channeling the Weave
Arriving home, escaping to the kitchen to start dinner, praying that Tav is busy elsewhere in the tower
Relieved to find a note that they will be home a bit later
Focusing on dinner preparation to the point that he doesn’t realize how much time has passed
Looking up to see Tav has arrived home. The air suddenly thick with their sweet musk
Gale, realizing from their glistening muscles, flushed cheeks and battle gear that they have been off doing their weekly practice at the local armory
Gale, completely mesmerized as a single bead of sweat rolls down their neck and over their heaving chest
OhGodsNo.jpg
Tav, greeting Gale with a quick kiss, suddenly finding themselves caught in his embrace
A purple hue rapidly covering Gale’s chest
His eyes dark, face flushed
His mouth hovering over Tav’s, his voice sounding parched. “Forgive me, my love. I seem to have made a mistake.”
Performing a quick spell with a single hand motion, changing the date on every calendar in the Tower. “I thought it was November 1st when we awoke this morning. My most humble apologies. It appears to actually be December 1st.”
Tav, their lips brushing Gale’s, laughing. “Oh? My goodness, November seemed to absolutely fly by.”
Gale, pulling Tav even closer, his lips brushing theirs as he whispers, “With any luck, December will feel like it lasts a lifetime,” before claiming their mouth with his own.
#Anon thank you for the ask I’m sorry it took so long to answer!!#I hope it was worth the wait ☝️🧙♂️#If only I could answer asks as quickly as Gale fails at NNN lmao#gale of waterdeep#gale dekarios#baldur's gate 3#gale x tav#bg3#galemancer#answered ask
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warm and alive (noah sebastian x reader one shot)
18+, mdni, sexual talk, smut, f oral receiving, p and v unprotected (wrap it before u tap it ;))
it was late in the evening, and the dark had already taken over the sky. the puffs of air escaping from my lips raised up in the air, disappearing like smoke around me. it was cold outside, making me bury my hands deeper in the pockets of my black coat, that was despite the furry layer on the inside failing to keep me warm tonight.
music was blasting through my ears, distracting me and keeping me company on my walk home. despite my mind always wandering off because of the melodies and lyrics creating images inside my mind because i loved to daydream, i was focused enough to also be in enough touch of my surroundings and get into my street safely.
as i looked around me, the apartment building across from my own had several lights on in different windows. most were just the classic warm yellow one, and some had different colors, like red, pink or blue. my eyes dart around, and pause at a certain window. a tall figure, belonging to a young man, leans on his open window with both his elbows, as long drags of his cigarette escapes from his mouth. he was fully covered in all kinds of colored, mostly faded tattoos. i had never seen him before, he must have just moved in here, since the apartment was empty for a week or two.
his dark eyes landed back down on me, making contact, looking intrigued and interested as they were slightly narrowed, taking in my physique quickly. his dark chocolate, mid long hair was slightly pushed back, just a strand hanging in front of his eyes, and a tight black tee shows how well trained his arms and chest were. it made my heart jump for a moment, and my throat turned slightly tighter because of some nerves kicking in, a small flutter going through my stomach.
there was absolutely no denying that this man was extremely attractive, and by the way his lips that were going back around his cigarette turned into a slight smirk he clearly noticed my slightly more nervous behavior, and i quickly looked down again, eyes stuck on the concrete tiles underneath my feet, even though they rather stayed on the man instead, completely captivated by him already.
and we both didn't seem to be able to forget that short moment of observation. the following week, every time i'd come home back from work he'd be there again, hanging out the window, sometimes sitting on his windowsill with one leg hanging out whilst smoking, the other one stretched out in front of him. every single time, we would make eye contact. every day it would be longer, by looking at him earlier as i crossed my street. the more we did it, the less shy i became, not letting my eyes dart away that easily like i did before. he pulled me in like some magnet, with a strong electric force, and it did more and more with me each time.
blushing, a rapid heartbeat---and breathing even at some point, as i became more and more hypnotized by his longing stare---trembling legs, stomach in knots and heat in my chest, but most of all, a very frustrating feeling between my goddamn thighs as well. and the longer we would stare, the quicker and stronger it was there.
and he absolutely knew, because he would lick his lips, he would take a longer drag of his cigarette, rolling it around between his long wise and middle finger, and his eyes became darker and more intense. they would take in every step, every inhale, every movement of my curves, every outfit i'd wear, the way my hair was styled that day, the way i was batting my lashes at him.
we longed for each other, but still wouldn't say a word.
one evening, as i once again grew tired of the hooks of my bra pressing uncomfortably against my back, i decided to take it off, something i always do after a long day of work. as i walked towards the window of my bedroom to close the curtains, my heart made a big jump---he was there. right in my view, right across my own window, facing me as well.
a lump appeared in my throat, and he stared right back. his window was closed now, and he was not hanging out of it as usual with a cigarette in hand---instead it seemed like he was just about to close his own curtains as well. we were literally mirroring the same pose, having our curtain in hand, but pausing as soon as our eyes met. my heart was hammering, and he was just staring, as if he was waiting, waiting for my next move---almost daring me to make a move.
and then, as heat was spreading not only to my cheeks but also my whole entire body, i took off my shirt, letting it drop to the ground, revealing my bra i was about to take off next. the corners of his mouth slowly and slightly curled up, eyes narrowing as usual, taking in the sight of my chest in the black lace. one corner of my lips couldn't help but twitched up as well---sultry like, mischievous wise.
then, i slowly slid the straps off my shoulders, and it almost looked like that made his breath hitch in his throat for a moment. one of my hands slowly got behind my back, the daring glimmer of my own eyes never leaving his, unclasping it. the lace fell to the ground, revealing my chest to him, and that made one of his brows rise in amusement, his pupils seeming to get darker somehow, blending in with the color of his irises.
my smile slightly widened as i took in his little needy expression, his eyes ranking down as if he wished he could take the rest off me as well, and i then closed the curtains---letting a big shaky breath escape from my lips that i pulled between my teeth next.
fuck, that excited me a lot, and i saw his lustful eyes in front of me still, as i closed my own. my lips then slightly parted as more heavy breathing escaped, feeling worked up, feeling desperate. desperate for my mysterious and attractive neighbor to do something about it, instead of my trembling fingers that went down slowly.
but after a few minutes, i then heard some loud knocking on my door downstairs, making me open my eyes and jumping me awake out of my steamy trance. a frustrated sound escaped my mouth as my heart hammered in my chest, quickly putting on a robe as i made my way down stairs, wondering who needs me at this time after work.
when i opened the door, i needed to tightly hold the door handle for support of not stumbling backwards, as i met the two dark brown eyes of the neighbor from across the street now standing in front of me. and god, he was even taller like this, making me need to tilt my head up to him, my eyes taking him in quickly before doing so. he was wearing a loose tank top with sweats underneath despite the weather, and his muscular, tattooed arms were being exposed even more, and a part of his just as tattooed chest as well.
'good evening,' his deep, slightly hoarse voice greeted me from the cold, chilly air outside, both making me slightly shiver. his eyes slowly ranked to my robe, being slightly loose because of the quick knot i had to make to hold the thin, light blue fabric together. the corner of his mouth slightly tugged up because of that, his stare like fire burning right through me, before meeting my gaze again.
'i had to stop by after that little show you did for me,' he then continued, his hands in the pocket of his sweats as he slightly tilted his head to the side, which made it hard for me to function properly, to get out my first words to him as smoothly as he seemed to be able to talk to me.
i cleared my throat and took in a quiet, shaky breath before answering with a slow smug expression appearing on my flustered face, 'for you? that's interesting. i think you were just lucky to be there at that moment. always take my bra off after a long day of work.'
he hummed at that with an amused twinkle and smile on his face. 'is that so? well, guess you can call me really lucky then,' he smirked, not seeming to believe my words, and my own grin turned wider as i leaned my head against the door, still holding it.
'so you're saying that i came here for disappointment? can't expect you to continue it, hm?' he then added, and i softly chuckled. the chemistry between us was thick, strong and heated already, leaving me aching for more, aching how much more needy i could get him for me, how much more he could worship my body by just his lustful stare.
'oh, i didn't say that,' i then responded, stepping slightly more aside, a gesture that he could come in. as he was about to enter with a smug and amused glimmer in his eyes still, i then quickly stepped in front of him, gently placing my small hand on his chest, which caused him to raise both his eyebrows in question.
'at least tell me your name, neighbor.' my hand slowly removed itself from his chest by going up and down first, his eyes flickering down at it, before then meeting my own again with a intrigued smirk.
'noah,' he answered, and i clicked my tongue.
'y/n,' i introduced myself back, and that made his smirk only broaden, the twinkle in his eyes growing even more, as if he knew he would enjoy using my name for whatever dirty fantasies he was holding captured inside his mind.
'well, y/n, your little relief for your back after your long day of work wasn't the only time i've noticed you, but you know that, noah then spoke, his husky voice closer to me now that he slowly stepped inside, closing the door behind him. the more steps he took, the more i became pressed against the wall.
'your little adorable walk every time you came home from work, all lost in your music, coming out of those black matching headphones of yours, matching your outfits', he continued, his body being towered over my smaller frame, and i gulped in both nerves and excitement, already clenching now and then by the way he looked down on me and spoke every word so sultry and deeply alone. 'so concentrated whilst pulling those gorgeous lips of yours between your teeth now and then.'
noah slowly moved his large hand to my chin, tilting my face even more up to him as he brushed my lips with his thumbs, seemed to be mesmerized by it, craving it. my legs have already begun to tremble in need of him, just by that small touch alone, and he seemed to be very amused by the way i reacted to it, as his devious smile grew bigger.
'and those skirts? don't you think they are a little short, darling? i mean, i am not complaining, but they drove me crazy all week. made me think of how great the view would be in front of me, just like those pretty tight jeans you're wearing right now.'
he slowly turned me around, causing me to let out a shaky breath of both excitement and anticipation, pushing me against the wall. he let out a deep, satisfied hum, practically feeling his stare burn through the fucking fabric. but as soon as his hands found my behind, squeezing it eagerly, he made me close to snapping completely more and more.
'fuck. feels even more firm than i imagined.' noah's voice sounded even more huskier than before, and shit, it made me even more aroused than i already was.
his hands slowly moved upwards, over the smooth fabric of my bathrobe, squeezing my chest even tighter than my ass, making me yelp out of surprise and pleasure. his lips already found my ear quickly after that, his hot breath fanning over it and my neck, his breathing fast and ragged.
'not gonna lie, i enjoyed our little eye fucking this week, but damn, the little sounds you make are even better darling,' he breathed, making me slightly whimper, his hands still holding my breasts firmly, his thumbs lightly rubbing over it. his hips were grinding against my behind, making me able to feel his own excitement grow.
'wonder what else i can bring out of you, and how, my pretty girl. you in? you want that?'
'yes,' i eagerly breathed out, and that made him turn me around in a quick movement, his own body being pushed flush against mine, before he then grabbed me by my legs, lifting me up and wrapping my legs around him, and held me steady in his strong arms as a mischievous, dark smile grew on his attractive face.
'yeah?' he cooed, his smug fucking smile only growing by that, and it made me want to crash my own lips against him, to make him breathless and even more eager for me. 'glad to hear that, my pretty neighbor. cause since the first time we made eye contact, i wasn't able to stop fantasizing about you.'
my cheeks flushed by hearing that, my heart rate sped up, my hands shaking by anticipation. 'really hm?' i couldn't help but slightly smirk in filthy amusement, and he mirrored it right away as he nodded.
'mhm. how could my cock not get hard by seeing you all small and needy for me down there on the street? surely had to do something about it each time,' he shrugged, and it knocked the breath out of me for a moment, the filthy words rolling off his tongue just like that. 'but this, oh darling this, is the best way to do something about those cravings for you.'
noah pressed his hard bulge even harder against my damp core, slightly rubbing, making the both of us groan and whimper.
'fuck baby, i don't know how you do it, but i already feel you eagerness through your jeans. so wet already hmm? so ready to be taken by me?'
i heavily nodded at that, pulling my teeth between my lips, and his dark eyes flickered down to it, before then hungrily capturing his own with mine. my own tongue immediately pushed through it, dancing with his, tasting the deliciousness of his need for me.
noah groaned as i pulled his hair as my hands found it, flushing his body even more against mine, before then breaking the kiss to look at me with heavy breathing, every being of him filled with lust and desire for me. 'where do you want to continue this, love?'
'use those trained muscles of yours and carry me upstairs,' i teased him with a sly smile, causing him to deeply chuckle with amusement before then doing what was said, and his quick pace took me to my queen-sized bed in no time.
he placed me down on it in a sitting position, kneeling down between my legs already quickly that he then pushed apart, a wicked smile on his face, painted by the light of the small lamp on the nightstand besides us, and the left overs of the dark of the room around us contoured the rest of his pretty features.
'let me taste you, y/n,' noah whispered hoarsely as his gaze got down to my pants, then back to me again, and i nodded, causing him to instantly begin to unbutton my jeans, pulling it off my legs, his eyes slightly widening at the sight of my thin, see through panties that covered my aching core.
'jesus,' he breathed after a gulp, 'you always wear this underneath?'
'not always,' i smirked, his eyes going back up to mine. 'you are just in luck. again.'
'fuck, yes i am,' he rasped out, his lean fingers slowly and teasingly rubbing up and down the thin lace fabric, which made me shift eagerly against the mattress underneath me with a slight groan. he smiled amusingly at that, looking at me for a moment with a mischievous glint before then tucking my panties down.
'gonna taste you real good y/n, every single inch, every single drop coming out of you, yeah?' noah mumbled, spreading my legs even more, a determined and hungry look on his face. 'have thought about this so much. fuck, can't imagine how good you'd feel wrapped around me, tight and warm.'
his words, combined by the way he looks at my eagerness and rubs and teases it slowly, his warm hands going up and down my thighs as well, makes me moan impatiently, making his lips twitch again, before then finally moving his head down---making fucking eye contact as he flicks his tongue slowly and lightly against me, and my head already quickly dropped back into my shoulders as a low groan escaped my throat.
the feeling of his tongue was amazing, better than i had imagined myself too, and worked slowly against my bud once more before then going deeper inside my slit, sucking and tasting me more intensely, and i was not shy to let him know how much i enjoyed it, the sounds of pure bliss surrounding us both. it made him moan against my clit, vibrating with even more pleasure, humming in appreciation of tasting me, in enjoyment of exploring every inch of me like he promised me he would.
'god,' he then groaned as he pulled back, his lips glinting with my arousal in the dim light, and it made my breathing sped up even more. 'i would love to make you cum like this, but i need to---have to feel you around my cock baby, need to bury me inside of you real deep.'
'please do, please take me,' i eagerly stammered out in between ragged breaths, and he got up and then pulled his tank top over his head in a fast and smooth movement, dropping his sweatpants next, his white underwear showing his need for me very clearly, and it made me even more needy for him.
'that's right baby, you got me so fucking hard for you,' he groaned as he noticed my eyes wandering down, dropping his underwear next, making them widen slightly, and i blinked to hide it quickly.
noah hovered over me as i moved my body up my bed to let my head rest against my comfortable pillow, and he positioned himself between my legs, feeling his length already teasing my entrance, and it caused me to buck my hips up in high anticipation, and it let his wicked grin return.
'such a eager little thing you are. ready to be taken by me, darling?'
i nodded as i breathed out a greedy yes, and his pretty brown eyes darkened even more, hypnotizing me as it made my head spin with need as well. he then pushed himself in, and i let out a harsh gasp as his eyes rolled back.
'jesus y/n. so fucking ready for me---' he started to move, his hands placed around both sides of my head, his hands digging into the fabric of my pillow, 'and feeling like a fucking delight. taking me so well.'
'noah,' i moaned out as my eyes shut, jaw dropped by the overwhelming sensations. it made him slip his tongue in as he pulled me into a passionate kiss, our moans and groans muffed by our lips.
'you cry my name so beautifully y/n, need to hear that more than just once. need to hear it as much as possible,' noah panted, trusting faster and deeper, creating a heavenly rhythm between our sweaty bodies, the sounds of our skin adding more heat for us like fuel lighting the flame.
and i cried his name out loud over and over again, like a prayer, like the one thing i only needed that moment, and it was true, he gave me everything i craved. he brushed my messy hair out of my face now and then, making our eye contact intense and strong, adding even more connection between us.
from that moment on, i knew that noah would become more than just my neighbor that captured my body and soul---he would become everything i needed and more, the only fire that would bring me warm and alive in these cold winter days.
#noah sebastian#bad omens#bad omens cult#bad omens fanfiction#noahsebastian#fanfiction#noah sebastian bad omens#bad omens band#badomenscult#noah sebastian fanfiction#noah sebastian davis#noah sebastian fanfic#noah sebastian smut#noah bad omens#bad omens noah#bad omens fanfic#joakim jolly karlsson#jolly karrlson#nick folio#nick ruffilo#nicholas ruffilo#smut fanfiction#smut#badomens#badomens fanfiction#badomensfanfiction#one shot fanfic#tumblr fanfic#fanfic#smut oneshot
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Tf 141: Mafia AU!
Chapter 2: Jobless? More like Job-bless
A/N: Link to prev ch + mini epilogue of the chap (where it goes to another character’s pov aside from the reader :DD) :
Preface:
After the mess of a morning, you instantly got roped into the orderly chaos of the bakery. Under a contract (a list of chores really) you are now tied to the place Nonna and Nonno calls home.
Although, you soon come to learn that it is the home of other certain individuals as well.
With a groan, you wonder how many things are left on the chore list posted on the to-do board, pinned with all sorts of menus, post-it notes, old recipes, and photos of people you don’t really care to know or recognize; although, you were curious of who that one handsome man was.
Which you kept at the back of your mind to ask Nonna during your break later.
For now, you had to focus up and sort this damn mountain of trash.
You even got scolded by the trash guy for having mixed the recyclables and non-recyclables! You pouted, mumbling that it wasn’t your fault but the old couple who ran this place— yet all he did was wave you off, saying that he’d make an exception and come by tomorrow, ‘as long as the trash is sorted.’
To be honest, you’d rather sort him to the non-recyclables pile.
Rancid- the whole lot of it was! You couldn’t believe it got stocked up until the second floor of the building… but you kinda have to wonder if they threw it from below with an underhand throw or dropped from the room you were currently in.
The latter seems more plausible.
Until you saw Nonna, spin and accurately place another bag on top- winking at your gaping form, knees bent with your elbows resting on it exhaustion.
“Is that nasty sickness gone?” She asks, arms folded on her chest as she leans by the doorway.
“I think I got another type of nasty sickness,” you raised your arms and showed the dirty yellow rubber gloves and apron covered in grime.
She laughs and nods, “well better get to finishin’! Else, you wouldn’t make it to the lunchtime rush.”
“Is that part of the list too?” You asked, stunned, you were very sure that was on there until Nonna waved you in. Pointing at the pin board by the doorway.
You slightly let yourself, making sure none of the guck got in the place you just cleaned. Bending and craning your neck upward, you gasp at how the checklist just became double its size from before, a stapler at both ends of the first one connecting to the next.
You quickly turn your head, tone accusatory- “you added onto it!”
“There’s a lot to do,” she shrugs, “didn’t quite give you the full list.”
She points to the first saying how that was Nonno’s list while the next was made by her. You pouted, finding it unfair- knowing how it wouldn’t be completed in a day, actually more than a week no less!
“How am I supposed to help you guys tomorrow if I can’t find my place today?”
She hums, tapping her chin before snapping her fingers and roughly pinching your puffed out cheeks.
“You stay upstairs with us, of course!”
“WHAT?”
You reflexively scream reacted, falling to your dramatically as your hands catch your upper body before it fell into the door way face first.
“Not a bad deal, right dearie?”
“Rightly so, dear wifey!”
You could hear the old couple tease you (with the old man coming in to see what the racket was that disturbed him from his cooking routine, only to see his wife amusing herself once more with the new kid she ���adopted” (nonna’s words not his)) making you feel even more depressed, wondering what made you think it was a good idea in the first place to sign up to this deal.
You wanted info- and they needed a helper. The end.
You should have read the Terms and Conditions really. (The non existent one aka, reading between the lines and the vibe of the couple.)
Alas, you accepted your fate, resigning to it really as you stood up, looking at the list before retuning to the trash area, where the old couples kisses and giggles were still echoing by the back door way. A reality slapping reminder of what you needed to get back to immediately.
Kneeling by the pile you left, you spot a cat- a strangely pristine white one with bright blue eyes. It looked a bit fancy to be wandering around this part so you checked its neck for a collar yet there was none.
Humming to yourself, you called to it softly as you removed your stickily sweat gloves.
The cat, as if heeding your call, comes closers to your whispers of encouragement and ultimately sits before you meowing and nudging its head towards you.
“Aww!” You gleamed, immediately petting it with your finger tips, but melt even more as it long and fluffy tail wrapped around your fingers- as if urging you to continue your pampering.
“You’re such a cutie! Aren’t ‘cha?” You continue cooing at it, and with how immediately comfortably attached the cat was with you- you decided to try and carry it by opening your arms.
The cat crawls pause, sensing your pets has stopped and stares at you.
You stare it back.
Like a lightbulb popping up, the cat meows and stand up, crawling closer and…
“Now who the hell is there?”
You and the cat screech, both jumping in the air.
Although the difference between the two of you was one landed on their ass while the other ran away.
Unceremoniously once again.
You heaved, looking at the man intimidatingly making himself known by the entrance of the alleyway to the back door of the bakery, smoke in hand while the other was on his side- a holster you assume as you see something gleam below the morning light.
You noticed that he wore a suit quite similar to the men you met last night. Although this time, it was dark navy blue in color with a heavy coat on top, and brown shoes that seemed quite shinier that the jewels he wore on his fingers.
As you picked apart his outfit, he came in closer, noticing how you shivered at his presence (you weren’t it was just cold and he surprised the beejeebus out of you.)
So he stopped a bit aways away, five feet apart to be safe of the unexpected accusation that might come along by strangers at the street side.
“Got any business with this place?”
“Huh?” You look up at him, finally looking at his- less irritated, more confused than anything- face. His slicked back blonde hair made his eye brow raise and forehead creases even more noticeable as he tossed to you his questionable stare.
“Oh, uh yeah- I do.”
He nods, “right.”
You deadpanned, with you not believing him and him not believing your words— you decided to start the conversation again by standing and introducing yourself.
“I’m Graves,” he does the same, and stuff his hands in his pocket, offering a nod and grin.
“Like…” you paused, “the tombstone?”
He deadpans this time and sighs, shaking his head.
“You... you can put it that way,” he waves his hand, “but what’s your business here anyway, shortstack?”
You grumble to yourself about his nickname but placed in the back burner for later, where you would also burn him- but that’s a plan in the making.
“Why do you need to know?” You reply, a bit apprehensive of his prying. It’s not like he lived here- as far as you know.
…Maybe he was going to hustle you for messing with his favorite smoking spot?!
“Oh!” You turn to him, making his mouth clamp shut. “This might have been your smoking spot right? My bad.”
You bowed your head in a slight bow when apologizing, “its just that the owners of the bakery told me to clean up here,” you pointed to the pile of dump on the trashcan, “but as you can see, its taking me some time.”
He laughs, finally connecting the dots in his head and figuring who you were.
“Those old hags giving you trouble?”
Suddenly his arm was on your shoulder, slinging you forward and into his space which made you slightly flinch away, half uncomfortable and the other half making you hope wouldn't dirty his- clearly expensive- suit then blame it on you and pay for cleaning or worse... replace it.
Yeah, you didn't want to think about that.
So, you shook your but deeply sigh anyways, "it's all good."
You didn't know why but you wanted to reassure the stranger. In hope of getting him off your case? Maybe so- but it was more likely that his suit quite stank from the smell of cigs and alcohol, but with the mix of his- high end- cologne- it was just a smell that spelled disaster for your senses.
"Really now?" Unconvinced he was again but at this point, why did you continue to care?
So you huffed, sliding out of his grasp- surprisingly easily- and went by the back door, arms crossed just like a certain someone had done moments ago.
"Really," you rolled your eyes, "but its up to you to believe it or not."
Graves' eyes sparkled, smirk widening as he sniffs out a challenge- a challenge to his authority.
He scoffs out an amused chuckle as he sees you stomp back into the bakery in a huff, clearly cutting short your interaction with him and the conversation.
A conversation he quite wanted to continue.
So he follows, interest now piqued, wondering if you were a new face in town or simply a fleeting face he'd forget in a momentary notice. Whatever it was, he wanted to know.
His gut feeling says he has to--
it hasn't proven him wrong after all.
Entering the warm bakery as compared the cold breeze the outside gave made you shiver, hoping your body would better quickly adapt to the temperature change.
Quickly hanging your apron, you called out to the two that you came back for the lunch rush, all the while washing your hands in the kitchen's sink.
Whistling a tune, you think back to the words of Nonna earlier, having said that you would have to stay here until you get the end of your bargain. At least, that was what you think she meant until the list is done and dealt with.
Your actions slow as you think of an alternative-- you could text your co-worker and ask them right now, but that was embarrassing to think of doing. They gave simple instructions of how to get at the place, yet you somehow got lost and stumbled upon so much more people than you think you would have before coming into this reputable city.
To be honest to yourself for a moment, you didn't want to admit it to them not because of embarrassment- but because of how you felt ashamed of yourself. You didn't like having yourself in this position, squandering away for any penny you can make, scraping by with each paycheck, and most of all, for being so stupid that you can't even repay the kindness your co-worker has shown you. It felt like a waste, that you weren't using it right now-- staying at their place and slowly making it up to them by paying back every single money they spent to pay for rent, utilities, and food that they provided.
So you resolved yourself, slapping your face with the washed hands to wake yourself up from the quite long (short) introspection of your situation right now.
You did owe Nonna and Nonno for staying here, but for the boss of Soup? No... Suds-? Anyways, you had to repay that guy's boss as well for the lodging last night.
Maybe you can rearrange the agreement with the couple to provide- at least- the minimum of minimum wages so you wouldn't be just free labor for their amusement.
Despite thinking that they really might need some help, looking around at the state of place.
"Seems like you washed your hands extra clean."
You hear a sip behind you, jumping once more as you naturally glared at the person that spooked you.
"Could you like," you waved your hands around trying to find words, "not spook me every time you appear-- are you the boogeyman incarnate or something?"
This man in front of you, as formal as he looks, just breaks into cackles.
Downright fits of laughter that continuously bubble out of him.
Wheezing and all that-- but you wait, staring at him strangely and for him to catch his breath.
After a couple minutes pass and he doesn't, even leaning against the doorway as he covers his face (which was bright red) in attempt to limit his giggles, you sigh and untangle your arms. Pushing yourself off the sink and moving him aside so you could start the lunch shift.
"Wa-wait!"
You hear the man wheeze out and in frustration, you grumble out a- "what?"
"I- I was only ask-asking about you earlier bec-because--"
"because he's la famiglia, cara!"
You turn to the sudden pop of Nonna at your side, looking at her in question, "what do you mean-?"
"He-!" She quickly slaps his back to cough out his remaining laughter, "is one of my sons!"
"Son?" you ask, head tilting as you think back to that photo on the board. You turn to the board, checking if you were right-- and it was as if fate checked mate you as your eyes locked onto the boy at the far right side of the one completed family picture (you assumed) which had a lot of members.
'Blonde and blue eyes...'
The man, who has just been a disaster a couple of minutes ago, had now regain his composure and grinned at you as if it didn't look like he was losing his balls earlier.
"That's why I was concerned shortcake," he wraps his arm around Nonna (who just snuggles into him), "'cause I'm her son."
'Oof. '
Well, now that you know that they were all their (adopted) children in that picture, you find yourself more at ease in Graves' presence as Nonna chats to him about what happened ever since you showed up, with him humming and commenting from time to time.
As they sat at the side, you continued to do your job, managing the register and the back of the house- sending orders in and plates out.
You did it so much that by the time another table came, you were in auto pilot, customer service mode.
"Hello and welcome! What can I get for y'all started with--"
"Well, aren't you worse for wear."
Hearing that out of place comment made you snap out of your stupor, finally taking in the faces before you.
"The guys from last night!" You gasp, "and Suds' boss!" you glanced at the man with a beard and you could see him smile and nod, reaffirming who he was.
"Yes, that's me-"
Yet he gets cut by the rounding laughter of the table, making you confused, muttered a small, "what?"
"Suds--" The kind man from the other night manages out before falling into another fit of wheezing.
"His name ain't Suds, darlin'," the guy with a rough, scratchy voice talks and you now see that he was wearing a skull mask on the upper part of his face, then a black clothe covering his lower half.
"It's not?"
The man in question groans out, "its Soap you nest-head!"
You clicked your tongue, "Now I'm less inclined to call you that, Suds."
Now even Price chuckles at this exchange, making 'Grickky' looking at him in shock.
"Did you sleep well?"
Price redirects the conversation and you turn to him with a smile and nod, "thank to you sir."
You politely bowed your head and told him how you were gonna pay him back for it, but he just shakes his head- telling that you "shouldn't worry your pretty lil' head over a lil' cash."
"But its not a little amount!" You protested and they looked at you in shock. Thinking that you would just accept it and be done with it.
"I know better than anyone how both kindness and money is precious, so I'll work to pay you back sir."
The determination flaming in your eyes makes them quite stunned at the moment before Price just chuckles, "do as you wish." He says in contentment of the moment, and he was quite satisfied from how you reacted- bubbling and smiling as if you weren't laying sick mere hours ago when they last saw you.
"Cara!"
You hear Nonna call for you and you pause, asking for the four to wait a moment while you walk to see what Nonna needed until you see her approaching in excitement.
"Nonna-?"
"Oh my gosh!" She squeals into your arms, "I can't believe you're meeting all my boys today!"
"Your...boys?"
You stare at her for a moment before redirecting it to the sheepish four who sat there.
Welp... now your proclamations sounds a little awkward...
There was no way she would let her own son pay for lodging at his parent's place.
Even though you've only known Nonna for a couple hours, you were quite sure. A conclusion which made you throw your head back in embarrassment once again.
"just how many sons do you have?!"
A/N: Long chapter for the 2nd one because I got inspired! And also for the warm reception and the attention my silly lil AU for Tf 141 is getting hehe so thank yall <33 Cheers to more chapters to come !!
#unedited#crackfic#cod mw2#tf 141 x reader#tf 141 x you#tf 141 poly#platonic relationships#cod x reader#graves x reader#phillip graves x reader#price x reader#soap x reader#john price#soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#kyle gaz garrick#gaz x reader#Tf 141 mafia au#tf 141 x reader poly#cod phillip graves#cod modern warfare#call of duty
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Time stuck au but it’s Pacifica meeting the Anti-Cipher society. And she is becoming Abigale’s apprentice in engineering.
I thought I DELETED THIS ASK but I DIDNT it was just HIDDEN FOR SOME REASON! anyway this idea has captivated me, I have yet to draw Pac with the whole society (I WILL) but here’s some doodles of her and Abbey!!
Click for Quality!
Also some extra musings under the cut…..
The Northwests travel to Illinois one holiday. Pacifica takes some time off from her insufferable parents to find someplace worth visiting. Unfortunately, it seems like nothing in Illinois is worth visiting. She eventually finds herself at 333 North East West Drive, a functionally abandoned historical building, “For Rent” sign collecting dust in its windows. Something catches her eye on the ground - what looks to be a normal tape measurer. I say “looks to be,” because it is in fact a TIME tape-measurer, albeit a half-broken one.
Pacifica ends up in 1901 using the half-broken time tape measurer and manages to break it completely. Luckily for her, Abigale finds her and agrees to help fix it… and teach Pacifica some mechanical know-how in the process!
Abigale doesn’t know that she’s Pacifica’s ancestor. Pacifica is pretty certain Abigale Blackwing is Abigale Northwest, but doesn’t say anything because Abigale Northwest was always considered a bit of a stain on the family, half-buried by history. Pacifica doesn’t want to let Abigale know she’s been erased, and honestly, is still a little bought-in to her family’s philosophy of sweeping “unsavory” people or things under the rug at this point.
Pacifica is actually pretty damn good at mechanics! She takes a second to get a hang of it, but once she grasps the basics she learns the rest shockingly quick. Abigale is so proud.
Pacifica actually helps enable some semblance of workshop-safety in the society, what with her modern knowledge that lead, mercury, and arsenic are all deadly toxins that you shouldn’t be putting in “anti-cipher tonic” to guzzle and/or rub on your skin.
The rest of the society LOVE Pacifica. That’s their collective daughter now.
Jessamine teaches her how to shoot! Pacifica isn’t a very good natural aim, but Jessie is patient and knows skill comes with practice.
Horace is so charmed by her, he really takes up a sort of father figure. He would mow down entire countries for this kid. Pacifica doesn’t know how to take Horace at first, since she’s so used to her real dad sucking ass, but she becomes close with him fast!
Thurburt is SO her silly weird uncle. Thurburt was always a clumsy, accident-prone fool, but somehow around Pacifica he becomes even more slapstickly-inclined. Pacifica thinks he’s doing it on purpose to get a laugh out of her. He is. It always works.
Even O’Pimm, the crotchety old drunk that he is, gets a kick out of her! He likes her honesty. If Pac thinks something’s daft or dull, she’ll say it. O’Pimm is glad to not be the ONLY one with sense around the society anymore.
And of course, it goes without saying that Abigale ADORES Pac. Abigale never wanted to be a mother, but teaching Pacifica the ropes of engineering and working her through her problems made her reconsider that thought.
Pacifica actually manages to fix the time tape measurer all on her own one night. It takes 2 weeks for her to finally tell the society. She almost doesn’t want to leave.
Abigale was the one to convince her to go home. “The future needs you, Pacifica. It needs brilliant, talented girls like you. You’ve got people waiting on you, but more than that, you’ve got a whole WORLD waiting for you! Live your life, Pacifica, your story doesn’t end in this time. Promise me you’ll make some change in that future of yours, rather than feel trapped in the past with us…”
Pacifica is a lot different when she returns. She’s suddenly way into tinkering, something she keeps secret from her family. She’s also a lot happier, and a lot less concerned about mistakes (though she’s more worried when her parents are in eye or earshot…)
Pacifica starts to really get interested in the story of Abigale Northwest. She unearths a lot of hidden secrets about her life. Most of it isn’t good, especially now. At least Pacifica knows the truth, now. (I have a VERY specific idea as to how Abbey’s life was after the society disbanded and it is NOT pretty. When I post it I’ll add a link here)
She wishes Abigale could have had her happy ending. She wonders if she had stayed behind, could she have changed things? She considered using the time tape measurer to go back more times then she’d like to admit. But she made a promise, didn’t she? Her job is here in the future, not stuck in the past…
#aria draws#digital art#digital drawing#fanart#aria asks#abigale blackwing#anti cipher society#anti-cipher society#pacifica northwest#timestuck au#gravity falls#gf#sketch#gravity falls au#gravity falls fanart#gf fanart#gf au#Thurburt mudget Waxstaff#Thurburt mudget Waxstaff iii#father tinsley O’Pimm#tinsley O’Pimm#Horace broadshoulder#Jessamine Delilah gulch
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Jared Bush says Frozen 3 will surprise people | Latest Updates
In an interview during D23, last weekend in Brazil, Jared Bush, the recently appointed CCO, gave away some teases about Moana 2, Zootopia 2 and the future of Encanto, but he also mentions a bit about Frozen 3.
He says:
“Yeah, yeah, Frozen 3 is coming. And from what I've seen so far [of the film] I think people are going to be surprised. I can’t give away too many spoilers, other than to say that Jennifer Lee is leading the charge and that the story and the direction that she’s taking these characters, what they’re facing, what they’re going to go through, I think is going to surprise a lot of people but it's also going to deliver on everything that people love about Frozen.”
So surprised is the word he uses to describe how we'll react to Frozen 3. That's given because as Jen has said recently that the concept art that was shown during this year's first D23 is just a glimpse of what we could see in the movie. Apart from what we make from that concept we have no clue what Frozen 3 is about and tbh I have to give it to the team for not spilling a single detail about the movie. I know we want to know more but imo I think they're saving all that content for the end of 2026 and into 2027. Maybe a few teases or better insight of the story by the end of 2025, but who knows. Probably also because they're still working on it so whatever they would have told us about the film so far, could have changed and form opinions in our heads about it which they really don't need at this current stage of production. I don't think the cast have even got the script yet as the story is still developing!
Bush also mentions that Frozen 3 is going to deliver on everything that people love about Frozen. Now that's the only real piece of information given - the focal point being on what we want to see. That's what the questions on the first D23 event were about - what we would like to see, what we feel is left to tell. We love the characters, the story, the individual arcs of those characters, the dynamics, the settings, the potential, the mystery, and so much more and so I'll take this a positive sign. That's all of what I make of it.
I know nothing major was revealed in this interview, but I still thought I'd share for those who do take into consideration these little hints and teases. Since Frozen 3's date has been pushed back from 2026 to 2027, most of the content will be given the year of the release and some the year before base done the previous two films promotion (it could be different as this movie is a two parter). I know that's quite long to think about (😭) especially with the honest disappointment that Frozen Winter Festival was not a short film or an official short series but rather just a YouTube series (which is cute nonetheless and good to see they're feeding the younger fans of the franchise), but now moving into 2025 we have 2 and bit years left so we should get more teases in interviews and events here and there.
But regarding FWF, I don't blame them too much because all their focus is on the Frozen 3 and 4 as it is being made back to back, then I'm certain it'll be worth the wait. We can still hope for some kind of Frozen content soon as we do have a couple more years to go so let's see. 🤷🏽♀️
P.s I have some Frozen edits I'd love to share so I'll post those if you need something new regarding Frozen. ❄️
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You might've answered something like this before but how do you pick colours for your art? Your choices are always so striking, visually interesting and delightful. I would love to learn your ways. (also hi)
WAAHHHH THANK YOU <3 <3 (also hi!!) first of all i do have a post from quite a while back with some general tips that you can check out, but my process has changed a bit since then so i can definitely elaborate a little bit more!
observation
this first tip is not very straightforward (sorry) but something i try to do is pay attention to the colors and lighting in the real world and try to remember what moments really stick with me. like when you're watching the sunset and the light from the sky washes everything in pink and tints the buildings orange, or when it's dusk and the light blue of the sky contrasts with the dark blues of everything that's in shadow, or looking in a lake and all the greens, browns, and blues mix together in rich jewel tones
i try to keep track of these things & the emotions they make me feel (almost like taking notes in a mental journal) so i can try referencing them when i want a certain drawing to feel a certain way. AGAIN this is really not straightforward and i don't really know how helpful it actually is...? but i find that observation can be a really helpful tool and i find myself doing it a lot
references
sort of the same as the last point BUT using preexisting photos and artwork instead! this one is more straightforward because you can actually reference them as you are drawing. i said this in the other post i made but i think that looking at other images and asking yourself "how is the artist/photographer using the colors to make it look this way? how do i recreate that?" and using that as a way to study their use of colors can be really helpful. if you find a drawing that has cool colors, try using those colors in your own drawings and see how they look!
that said, i would try to avoid color-picking things directly because i find that if you try choosing them on your own you 1) gain a better understanding of what you're doing 2) have more control over what you're doing and 3) you can "push" your colors in ways you might not if you color-pick directly
play with contrasting hues
i think this might just be a personal preference, but i find that i'm not as big of a fan of monochromatic images, and i prefer it when drawings utilize a wide variety of hues. this goes especially for ones that implement more contrast in the hues (not necessarily where the colors have more contrast in value, but rather contrast as in they're further apart on the color wheel)
for example, in this drawing, everything is washed in green light except for rose's skin, which is a very saturated reddish-brown. this is sort of what i mean by "pushing" the colors because, in a realistic setting, a person sitting in green lighting is going to have a more greenish-looking skin tone (like in this drawing). you can see this in how the whites of the drawing—her hair and eyes—are greenish, but i made the stylistic choice to not do the same with her skin to create contrast between the two hues
i edited the one on the bottom to match the green-ness of the rest of the image, and the effect is pretty noticeable! green light makes people look less lively, almost sickly (which is good to use if that's the feeling you want to show, of course)
another small example of this is in this drawing where i use a couple of different hues in davesprite's body. overall, it registers as orange, but i like to ever-so-slightly introduce a bit of green to contrast with the orange, letting the lightest values tip into the greens instead of stopping at yellow to contrast with the muted red in the wings. the darkest values are purple, which also contrasts with the yellow parts. the only hue missing from this image is blue! the colors are all still analogous, and the greens and purples are a lot less saturated than the oranges and yellows, so nothing clashes and overall leads to a more subtle contrast
the colors on the top are the ones from the image, while the ones on the bottom i see used a lot more commonly—which isn't a bad thing! i just think it looks nice to use a wide range of hues because of the way they complement each other :)
other than these strategies, my process varies greatly depending on what i'm working on, so it's difficult to get any more specific than this (unless you'd like to ask about the process of a specific drawing!) there isn't really any step-by-step method i use for every drawing i make, usually i am doing something different each time based on the goals i have for the project
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“Describe to me in detail the exact texture of a perfect pumpkin pie.” Says Armand from behind his notebook.
“Uh” says Janet, the manager at the all night bakery exactly 3.475 miles away from the condo he shares with Daniel.
He doesn’t need Daniel knowing about his plans and Daniel is a great many things, but stupid is not one of them.
The bakery’s two regular employees, Elizabeth and Garret shoot them furtive glances from behind the counter. He’s not allowed to talk to Elizabeth and Garret anymore. Apparently he was being “creepy” and “intense” and waiting to ambush them with questions out in the parking lot was also not acceptable. Daniel wants him to rely less on his vampiric gifts. “If you’re going to act like a human, you should maybe try to actually act like a human” he had said. Whatever that means. Armand hasn’t been a human in a very long time and many of their behaviors are confusing to say the least. But if he isn’t to use the Mind Gift to parse the answers he needs, he needs to be… personable.
And so he sits with Janet, who had agreed not to call the police on him as long as he promised to “stop being weird” and buy something. The look on her face implied that he should buy several somethings. Perhaps many somethings. There was now a box of individually wrapped slices of cake settled on the table next to them in the corner booth that they are currently occupying. He can’t bring the cakes back to Daniel because then he will absolutely know something is going on, but perhaps he can leave them on the doorstep of a family the next street over without arousing suspicion.
He can tell that Janet is trying very hard not to ask him why he doesn’t try some of the pies the bakery has on display. It’s a fair question. Maybe he can pretend to be allergic to eggs. There are eggs in pies aren’t there? Food is so much different now than it was when he was alive. He takes a breath he doesn’t need and says very quickly “This is my first Thanksgiving with my husband and I want it to be perfect.” There, that was a normal thing to say. It even had some relation to the truth. Somewhat. If you squinted a lot. Janet, however, visibly relaxes in the booth across from him and beams in delight.
“This is Armand.” Says the still smiling Janet to the tall and rather disheveled looking blonde woman wearing chef’s whites with her hands buried in some sort of floury mixture spread out across the top of the metal table in the back room of the bakery. The woman had tersely introduced herself at Katia before turning to Janet and proclaiming “Isn’t that the guy who was being weird on the security cameras?”
“This is shortcrust pastry.” Says Katia after several tense minutes and a very pointed eyebrow from Janet. Armand dutifully writes “shortcrust pastry” in his notebook.
Katia takes on the air of someone about to deliver a very in-depth lecture. The slight tightening around her eyes (as well as her inner monologue) implies that he had better pay attention.
“It’s used in both sweet and savory pastries, tarts, and pies and is referred to as a “short” crust because the texture is light and crumbly.”
Katia explains to him the process of making the pastry. For some reason there is rendered animal fat involved and he is made to absolutely promise that he will not use “the devil’s ingredient” although he is utterly unsure what “Crisco” is. Perhaps some sort of poison.
“We roast our own pumpkin in house. It’s sourced from a local farm that’s known for their pie pumpkins.” says Katia. Armand feels his eyes widen ever so slightly in doubt.
“Of course, you can always use canned pumpkin” she continues with the air of someone who has just suggested that he eat raw sewage.
“It appears very… orange” hazards Armand. Katia narrows her eyes at him.
“I am certain most humans love it!” He backpedals. Katia gazes at him a moment longer and then visibly moves on.
She shows him the finished pies balancing on the cooling rack. They are no less orange than the roasted pumpkin that she had shown him earlier. He had looked up pictures of pumpkin pies on the internet and hoped that they would perhaps look less orange in person. He thinks that actually, the opposite is true. At least the baked ones no longer looked like soup.
“And people enjoy these?” He asks
“Yes.” Says Katia irritatedly. “Now get out of my kitchen.”
He strolls home through the night, box of cakes wedged awkwardly under one arm. He had no idea human food was so complicated. He supposes that he hasn’t given much thought to human food in a very long time. When he was alive it was more about sustenance than pleasure. He realizes that he wants this meal to be pleasurable for Daniel, after all it will be his last Thanksgiving as a human.
#iwtv#devil’s minion#interview with the vampire#amc iwtv#armand#daniel molloy#amc interview with the vampire
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If that's how you interpret Mai, that's fine. I've read some really great stories where Mai is written as someone who has a cold, prickly exterior, but is all warm and fuzzy on the inside. Some writers really make that work for her. I don't think the show really bears that out. The way Mai is written (or underwritten) leaves a lot of room for people to take her in different directions. For me, it's less that I don't like her, and more I don't see her as a good person, so her ending made no sense to me.
The Beach is the only time we really get to see the softer side of Mai, and it's so much at odds with what came before that I, and a lot of other people, truly believe it was added at the last minute because they needed a reason for Mai to turn on Azula and save Zuko. Because that's not who she was until then. I have (and still could) go on, and on, and on, and on....blah, blah, blah about why I don't like Mai, or rather prefer her as a villain, but I don't want to bore you with it, so I'll give 3 reasons, and I'll be brief.
Yes, absolutely that moment with Zuko on the balcony is bad, and that's where I decided I hated Maiko. Actually, that's where I became certain that I was supposed to hate Maiko. After everything he's been through, for that to be her reaction to him opening up was vile. Especially considering that she got with him specifically to manipulate him into doing what Azula wanted.
She treats people terribly in general. I've brought this up before, but the fact that it's made clear that she takes joy in ordering servants around for fun and then it's never addressed in her "redemption" is maddening. The show is using so much short hand to prove that Mai is not a very nice person, and it's never walked back. That's just who she is, and she's very unapologetic about it.
This is more of a meta complaint about how Mai was written, and then hastily rewritten, but the show failed to make me believe anything Mai says in Book 3. When we meet her, she goes out with the guards to find the rebels who attacked her family (of colonizers). She's clearly been taught to fight, and those knives probably don't come cheap, either. Mai doesn't hide her bad attitude from her parents, who react the way most parents would when they have a child who didn't want to move for their parent's promotion. So how am I supposed to by that her parents were these emotionally distant, cold, repressive jerks who didn't let Mai have fun? I also don't believe she fears Azula. She doesn't even hesitate when Azula comes and asks her to help her hunt down Zuko, who she has feeling for, even though the best outcome for him at that point was imprisonment. This was the same episode, by the way, did such an amazing job setting up how terrified Ty Lee was of Azula. The same episode. They could've added some hint that Mai was afraid of Azula here, but they actively chose not to. That made her about face in Book 3 look really weak, especially because she only turned for Zuko, not as the culmination of any internal work on herself. If Zuko had stayed loyal to the Fire Nation, so would she.
I've already gone on longer than I meant to. I can't speak for anyone else who doesn't like Mai, but if I had to sum up my feelings, I like Mai better as a villain. To me, she works better as a hedonist who is here for a self-indulgent good time and a loyalist who upholds the status quo. Or as Maleficent. Give me a Maleficent coded Mai.
i actually can't process why people don't like mai. is it because of the "i just asked if you were cold" scene. is that it. okay LISTEN i will go to bat for her. she says it herself in the beach episode, she's been raised to not share her opinion or like. care about anything. she probably deflects in that moment because it's obviously an emotionally heavy conversation and she's been told her entire life not to share her feelings. or share other people's feelings, tbh.
she's ngl pretty incompatible as a match for zuko, who is constantly full of feelings, and needs someone who can help him work through them in his life, like iroh or katara. but that does not make mai the stone cold bitch y'all haters want her to be. i promise she's fluffy on the inside, the stone cold bitch is but a thin outer shell that protects all the love and care she contains within herself
#the REAL maleficent#the one that cursed a baby because she wasn't invited to the biggest party of the year#not the soulless disney cash grab version
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i don't have any special insights or strong evidence for this, this is 1000% just Political Vibes, but i feel like there's a good chance this phase of political development sees a realignment that cashes out in, on the one hand, what you might call "revisionist ideology" opposed to "status quo ideology." and here by "revisionist" i mean the term in the way bret devereaux uses the term "revisionist powers," i.e., states that seek to challenge the current international diplomatic order, vs. the "coalition of the status quo" (roughly, but not 100%, the West/Global North/NATO+allies).
by modern standards the revisionist faction is made up of both left and right elements; the coinciding forces here isn't horseshoe theory all-non-liberals-are-the-same type stuff, but simply an alignment of what are in some respects ideologies coming out of very different traditions that are brought together by circumstance. part of this circumstance is that both are nostalgic: tankies who miss the USSR, right-wing populists who miss not having so many immigrants around, social conservatives who miss getting to call gay and trans people slurs, etc. There's a strain of strongman authoritarianism, social conservatism, and economic populism that cuts across what used to be historically very different categories, which is why you see leftist commentators who have defined themselves primarily through their opposition to liberalism rather than right-wing reaction arguing themselves into supporting trumpism; why socially-conservative parties who nonetheless claim the mantle of leftism, like BSW, can cannibalize a lot of the leftist vote in countries like Germany (or, in other countries, the former Marxist-Leninist parties just become outright conservatives and nationalists)--and the germ of this kind of shit goes back as far as like the original red-brown third way types from the 20th century, it's not like the angry contary reactionaries on both the left and right just now noticed they had stuff in common!
but one reason i am cautious about this thesis is that i think this is a type overrepresented online; and i am cautious about extrapolating too enthusiastically to the real world. i suspect that at some point somebody like sahra wagenknecht is going to realize she has quite a lot in common with someone like alice weidel. but maybe not! maybe i am too cynical.
and the "status quo" ideology is not, like, Objectively The Good Guys, here. this is the liberal, rule of law faction, but it's also the unabashedly capitalist faction, and in many ways the neoliberal faction, too--one that includes a lot of left-liberals, too, but left liberals who by virtue of finding themselves making common cause with other flavors of liberal are going to find their power diluted. and this is a faction that is happy to embrace social freedoms, albeit within certain frameworks: the "we heart gay prison guards" guys, in other words. insofar as it is the party of the status quo it's also the party that finds it harder to imagine things could be better, to push the envelope in terms of policy or even to provide a strong ideological account of what the world should be working toward. the pure grievance-and-xenophobia politics of revisionist politics don't provide much of a narrative in that department, either, but at least they provide someone to blame, and promise the catharsis of taking your anger out on the hated outgroup.
i think this would be a pretty dismal politics, but i think it would be a stable equilibrium for a while--at least as stable as left vs right proved for much of the 20th century. i think there are also a lot of other ways for the zillions of tiny incentive gradients and interest groups that make up society to align themselves in broad political dichotomies, though. i don't think there's anything inevitable or necessary about this alignment, anymore than there was about left vs right or, before that, court vs country or barons vs emperor or guelphs vs ghibellines or populares vs optimates. so if we do find ourselves there i think that's a trap we can escape--if we care to
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Im neither a proshipper nor an anti at this current stage in life, but at one point i was an anti i guess? And I hate it say it, but looking back, I understand why. I don't think I actually gave a fuck about Harmful Fanfic or whatever, it was just a substitute for therapy that i couldn't get at the time (because "literally neurodivergent and a minor" or whatever, but like...actually literally neurodivergent and a minor LOL).
As weird as it sounds like, no one cared about my ACTUAL PAIN, and that made me feel EVEN MORE PAIN, so i took it out on ppl who shipped "abuse", or whatever.
It's so stupid now, as an adult who is mentally better than I was then, but as ridiculous as it was, seeing someone ship an "abusive" ship or a "queer erasing ship" (like a canonically gay character with someone of the other binary gender)...it felt eerily similar to the actual abuse I was facing and the stress that everyone was putting on me to find a boyfriend or ask why my (closeted lesbian) self didn't like any boys.
But it was so much easier to keyboard warrior about how people who ship Bad things are Bad people, than it was to fix any problems in my actual life because...well, the actual problems in my life COULDN'T be fixed. That isn't a learned helplessness thing, there was genuinely nothing I could've done. So pissing off Shippers was, like, a vessel for that, and it *felt* like I was getting to lash out at the same people who were ACTUALLY hurting me, even though that obviously is not the case. Funny thing is, it wasn't actual fandom discourse that made me switch sides, it was getting to learn more about youth liberation movements and stuff, because it was then that I recognized the actual structures that were making me hurt.
I think one silver lining is it's made me more compassionate an adult. While I don't have any defense for the antis who do actual horrendous stuff like doxxing or sending death/rape threats, etc, I do have a lot of defense for the ones who were like me and would just make posts talking about how Wrong it is to ship certain things. I know that not all antis are in the same place that I was once was, and some are just genuinely immature brats, but it's like. . . I get it, you know?
The cycle of abuse/bullying is weird and it's not often a 1:1 "I had an abusive parent so now i'll be an abusive parent", sometimes it's the chronically online stuff like I did. It's also why I'm careful-careful to not engage and to just block or, even try to have a mature discussion if I can, and if the person I'm talking to is just "a little bit annoying" rather than "actual bully doing/sending illegal stuff". A lot of them just want to be heard, I think, and it really makes me sad that this is the way they choose to be heard...but also i get it, because i was that.
--
Yup. We often discuss anti tendencies in this framework.
People want control over their environment when they have none. They want the world to make sense and for there to be simple rules they can follow to Never Mess Up. This is a very common reaction to trauma and also typical of brains that like order and neat boxes and a world full of justice and logic.
The trouble is that a critical mass of "I'm just pointing this out" type posts does tend to make all the other teens with an issue around moral scrupulosity implode. (And let's be real, plenty of the antis themselves are secretly into dark content and are trying to pray the gay kink away.)
I have some sympathy, but I'm still going to tell people they're sealioning when they are and tell them they're flat out wrong about how fantasies work, not sugar coat it because they're probably a delicate teen. There's no need to be excessively mean or treat people as irredeemable, but I also don't like how we talk endlessly about compassion for teen antis and not for teens targeted by antis. It's similar to how there are all those complaints like "Hey, I work hard to manage my mental illness, but all the support seems to go to people who are letting their issues rampage..."
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mmm ran out of steam for this one so you get a wip today
it's a hunter owl house one, shocker. i like the boy and fanart inspired me. read if you wanna deal with my comma overuse
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
He really does look like him.
He doesn't exactly have a perception of what he himself looks like. He discovered a word recently, aphantasia—he can't imagine things, visually at least. The voice in his head never shuts up, monologuing constantly and tracing three thought strings at once, but his eyes see nothing but reality.
He doesn't know what he looks like, in that he can't envision himself and he certainly wouldn't be able to draw his face. He knows the basics, maroon eyes, large ears, a rather hooked nose he used to despise until he noticed his Uncle shared the feature, heavy brows, annoying ass strand of hair, tooth gap, eyebags, ear notch, scar—Titan, good thing he never took off his mask, because he really is a recognizable face.
Caleb, he finds, shares none of these features. He's got the nose, and he does seem to have the forelock Flapjack seems to adore (there's something about that that Hunter feels is notable, but he won't be looking into it lest he have a breakdown), but all those standout features seem absent.
And yet.
And yet, looking at the statue, it really feels like it should move when he moves. He sees that face in his reflection, however much he avoids looking at it. He recognizes it as his own.
Caleb has a squarer jaw than Hunter, though that may come with age. His cheekbones are more defined, his eyes are less sunken in, but...
Caleb looks like him.
Or, rather, he looks like Caleb.
He. Hm. Hunter... does.... nnnnnot like this fact, he thinks. He's pretty sure. The complicated swirl of emotions that's brewing in his gut is probably majority unease. Maybe.
He discovered another word, alexithymia. He doesn't feel emotions correctly. Usually the only way he knows what he's feeling is by paying attention to his voice, whether his hands are shaking, how stifled he feels physically. The exception is fear. Fear, he feels deeply and intrinsically. He knows that one in and out.
Sometimes he gets... Pangs, of emotion, usually in sympathy. That's what he has now. It's unclear what emotion is pressing at his insides, but using context clues and tracking his thought patterns, he concludes it's discomfort. He is unhappy.
The statue looks like him.
He finds himself mimicking the expression, his neck aches from stretching it out to reflect the art. Stone faced, in more ways than one.
He's supposedly very expressive. He had to learn what ther people's faces meant, but apparently his own knew exactly how to betray him from the start. There's another word, this time taught to him by a certain Luz Noceda, that he's only briefly researched and vaguely understood. Autism.
He's collecting A words like Belos collected crude imitations of his... What? Brother? The plaque seems to think so.
A Caleb Wittebane. Orphaned son. Beloved everyman. So tragic that he disappeared.
How about good riddance, hm? Begone with him. Maybe the brother of a maniac deserved to be slain.
He doesn't actually know what happened to Caleb. Presumably he was killed by a witch, and Belos swore revenge. And perhaps raised the dead a few hundred times while he was at it. As you do.
How Caleb ended up following a witch into the Isles and Belos followed, he's no clue. Maybe Masha was right, maybe Caleb fell in love. Feels unlikely for a witch hunter.
aaaaaand that's where I gave up. may revisit this at some point
#can you tell how much i'm projecting my Issues onto him#so many words!!!#my writing#god i cant seem to end sentences#i write how i think‚ which means a lot of places all at once#wip#writing wip#hunter#hunter toh#toh hunter#hunter noceda#caleb wittebane#caleb toh#toh caleb#caleb clawthorne
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you said rhiannon and safe word in the same blurb and now i'm having some thoughts...
i'm thinking about a really intense scene, maybe you being tied up in her basement and her fucking you - whether it be with her strap, her fingers, her tongue, or her knife, she's bringing you to another orgasm (you've lost count of how many she's given you)
now, she's content to wring as much pleasure as she can out of you, but it's getting to be too much. the pleasure has turned into pain and you don't think you can take it anymore. so, you utter your safe word, a hushed sob beneath your breath
red.
she's immediately stopping any and all stimulation, backing away to give you some space. i feel like if it's at the beginning of your relationship, she'd lowkey panic, freezing up and apologizing over and over again. you assure her that it's ok and that she didn't do anything wrong. she's immediately rushing to untie your bonds (if she can't do it fast enough/her hands are shaking too much, she cuts them off with her knife)
the whole night is spent by her side while she continuously makes sure you're ok. she draws you a bath, she brings you a fresh pair of clothes/pjs, and she's constantly checking in to make sure you're ok. she just cares so much about you and she wants nothing more than for you to be ok 💔💔💔
-🪐
100% yess!! she just wants you to be okay :(( god i love rhiannon so much guys cannot!!!
— warnings: established relationships. fem!reader. implied knife play. nsfw content. mdni. use of safe word. after care.
so. as we’ve established: rhiannon loves to know that you trust her as much and that you let her explore these rather ‘extreme’ things with you.
obviously, with handing over power like this comes a certain responsibility. rhiannon lowkey gets so happy and excited (and not even in a sexual way) to have somebody there who loves and appreciates her so much that they’re willing to share the experience with her!!
before you get started, she talks about every possible thing that could happen; discusses safe words and boundaries, things you definitely want to incorporate, dealbreakers, and stuff that you’re not sure about/want to experiment with. obviously, even with all of that settled, there are times when it just becomes too much to handle. pushing you to your limits is the point, after all, and rhiannon appreciates it even more that you’re comfortable and willing enough to stop whatever you’re doing and don’t try to push yourself for her sake.
that doesn’t mean she’s not in full panic mode the first time you use your safe word.
she’s been keeping you tied up for what must’ve been hours, at this rate. she’s started out by rubbing her knife against your clit until you’d been pushed over the edge -embarrassingly fast and from nothing but the firm pressure of the handle. ever since you’ve lost count of how many orgasms rhiannon has given you. she has put her mouth on you, has finger fucked you (-stuffing your cunt full. “so you’re ready to take my cock” she’d claimed, pumping three fingers into you at a brutal pace), and has then gotten the strap out for good measure.
that’s how she’s been fucking you ever since. right now, your wrists are tied together and she’s got you bent over, ass up and face down as she slams into you from behind. under different conditions, you would wonder how she does it, how she keeps up the relentless motion of her hips, snapping forward time and time again. but right now, your brain is foggy with the haze of your previous orgasms and the sting of overstimulation.
something seems off today, though. usually, there’d be pleasure in the pain that comes from being pushed this way. there’d be a thrill in knowing you’re giving all control to rhiannon. there’d be at least one more orgasm in you. it had been pleasurable, up until this point, after all.
under your breath, knowing you won’t be able to manage anything louder than this, you utter: “orange”, not willing to call it quit just yet. maybe, you think, you can take some more. you want to be good for her, you want to please her.
rhiannon slows her pace down. “are you okay?” she checks in as established. “do you need a break?”
“i don’t- fuck- i’m not sure-“ you stammer. god, rhiannon really has been fucking your brains out, hasn’t she?
her palm lands on your back, tracing the skin there soothingly. “take your time baby” she assures you. she’s so tender with you. in an instant, it pushes the first sob from your throat. her strap is still buried to the hilt, but now that you have the time to consider it, there’s no longer any pleasure in the way it feels. your body is too spent to accommodate the stretch.
“red” you cry out, unable to string any more words together.
rhiannon is backing off of you immediately, a quiet little gasp falling from her lips. you can’t see her yet, she’s still behind your back, but now you long to, desperately.
“i’m sorry” you hear her, sounding frantic. the sound of the harness dropping to the floor still rings in your ears by the time she walks around you. “i’m so sorry, here-“ rhiannon steps into view. she’s discarded the strap and a panic expression is written all over her features. she is in a rush to untie you, cursing quietly under her breath as she isn’t able to undo the knots fast enough for her own liking. in the end, though you’re only half aware of it, she cuts them with her knife carefully.
“is it okay if i touch you?” she asks softly, her hand lingering just above your shoulder, always knowing when to take and when to give, and not yet touching you.
you can only muster a soft nod, but rhiannon sees nonetheless and carefully maneuvers you so you’re no longer on the cold floor, but half draped over her lap. like this, she waits the time out that it takes for your breathing to calm until you’re coherent enough to verbalize your needs.
(she caresses your body all over, whispers sweet nothings against your temple, and plays with your hair.)
“can we go to the bedroom?” you suggest weakly. whilst you appreciate being cradled in her arms, it would obviously be better in the comfort of your bed. you don’t have to ask her twice: instantly, you’re picked up and carried all the way through the house until you’re both curled up under the covers together.
rhiannon is still excessively apologizing at this point and continues to ask if you’re okay: “is this comfortable for you?”, “do you need anything else?”, “god i’m so sorry, i should’ve known”, “can i get you something?”
even after you’re conscious enough to reassure her that you’re okay, that this could’ve happened before, and that the point is not that it was too much, but that she immediately stopped what she was doing to look after you, rhiannon still makes sure you’re the center of her attention for the rest of the evening. she gets you into your most comfortable pjs, takes a bath with you if you feel like it and lovingly scrubs your body clean.
if you don’t, she offers to order dinner for you, and the two of you end up having a movie night on the sofa, cuddling together with tink curled up beside you.
with you, she’s always nurturing like you’ve never seen before but especially after using the safe word, rhiannon wants nothing more than to make up and ensure that you’re okay <33
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How do you deal with guilt around being a man, and like generally feeling like you're "betraying women" or choosing to be something bad by transitioning? It's something I've really been struggling with..
I sort of have two answers for you.
The first is a bit glib, but I think you've got some bioessentialism to unlearn, anon. I know that it's probably not a belief you arrived at yourself- rather, a bunch of hateful radfem douschebags have so often repeatedly said shit like that, that you're a traitor, you're failing feminism, youre just trying to escape the patriarchy, you're mocking what women are, men are evil and youll become evil especially with testosterone. That kind of crap.
Genuinely I do not give it any thought. It's ridiculous on the surface, so I write it off as misguided and inane. There is no logical way to justify grouping an entire half of the population together, deciding that the one thing they have in common (being men) is somehow the defining trait about them (because nothing else is being taken into account, like their sexuality, ethnicity, trans or intersex status, poverty level, where they live, whatever) and then also deciding that one common trait is the root of all evil. I've personally had a lot of experience with people doing this with certain mental illnesses- particularly cluster B personality disorders- and deciding like "yes this one thing about you makes you evil. You have Evil Person Disorder," and seeing how stupid that was, I just applied it elsewhere. Humans are far too diverse, nuanced, and contradictory for any flat rule like "all X people are bad" to ever be accurate. If it's not accurate, it's not useful, so I don't judge myself by it. I literally just block the people spewing that shit and let it slide off like water on a duck. I have enough warped internalized beliefs from my upbringing- I'm not adding more when I can immediately and obviously see their flaws.
So my advice is to block anyone you see saying that shit. You might be beginning to internalize it because of just how often you see it- so you need to cut that off at the source. Radfems are not and never will be allies; they do not have "some good points." Their movement was specifically designed by conservatives to uphold white supremacist capitalism, and nothing that comes from that is ethically correct. I'd suggest picking up Mothers of Conservatism by Michelle Nickerson. A lot about the origins of the radfem/female separatism movements are detailed there, created by fundamentally conservative women. With this new 4B movement shit on the rise, it's helpful to understand how fucked up and wrong they've always been from the beginning. My second answer to you is to look at what manhood means to you. If you don't think you can be objective about this, ask a friend to help. List the traits you associate with what *you* personally want to be as a man, what you hope you transition towards. Do you want to be a financial provider? Do you want to defend your community? Do you want to be generous? Brave? Do you want to be an expert in a special interest? Do you want to make lots of friends?
Make a list of those traits. Then look at them, divorced from the idea of gender. Is being a financial provider "bad?" Is being generous bad? Or brave? Or having lots of friends? Are any of these things bad in isolation, or does your guilt about them come from their association with manhood? Is that /your/ association, or did other people cause you to think there is an association?
For me, I had two formative male relationships as a child. My father, and my maternal grandfather. My father was an abusive piece of shit who liked to pick me up by the throat and slam me into walls, threaten our pet cats, scream at me until I dissociated, called me slurs, hated my opinions on anything, belittled me, believed only in capitalism, is a social darwinist capitalist schill, hates my mom, treated me like a servant and punching bag, and is a miserable fuck with no friends.
My grandpa was an old man who loved scotland and tartan and scottish terriers even though he never had one, loved each of his cats which he had all the time. He collected coins and read about history, he made model planes. He watched judge judy with me and talked about the cases and if we agreed with her rulings; he watched the news from multiple different outlets a day and taught me to weigh them against one another. He loved sitting on the porch and watching neighborhood kids play, and he drank a lot of lemonade. He was a brilliant chemist, provider, raised 4 kids in near poverty, then raised 8 grandkids after that. He would sneak me chocolate malt balls as a "vitamin" and he would tease my grandma by pretending to pick up and lick his plate after dinner. He taught my uncle to garden who then taught my cousin, so all my life gardening has been "mens work" to me. He was soft spoken, curious, patient, and mischevious. He loved my grandma for 60 years until he died.
These men have nothing in common except that they were men. Being a man didnt make my grandpa evil because he chose not to be. Being a man didnt make my dad evil either; he's an evil fuck because he made that choice. They are both sentient beings, who can use logic and emotions alike. One chose poorly. It never made sense to me as a child to assume all men would be like my dad or like my grandpa, because they were both men and they weren't at all like each other. Some categories are just so broadly diverse that they aren't really helpful- if I ask you to picture a mammal, do I mean a monkey or a mouse? Does "sea creature" mean a giant ass blue whale or a tiny piece of plankton? "Man" as a category is too broad to make assumptions about. I know it sounds circular and reductive, but the only thing that makes someone a man is...being a man. Nothing else.
I find it helps to look at a diverse array of men, to see all that men can be, especially men not like myself or the men I know. What does it mean to be a man in rural Yunnan farm country? What did it mean to be a man in medieval europe? What is it like being a gay black man from california, or a hunter living off the grid in appalachia? What does it mean to be a man in a culture where long hair is masculine, or where harvesting plants is masculine, where being a doctor is masculine? What about cultures where adornment is masculine? Hell, what about animals? What's it like to be a male lion vs a male house cat? What do I think about male cardinals, who are the bright lovely red ones, whose color is meant to draw a predators eye to them and away from the female cardinals and their nests?
To me, gender is an all you can eat buffet. It's customizeable. You can pick up or ignore or throw away any traits you want or don't want. Grab things that are feminine in your culture and incorporate them into your manhood in a subversive, gender nonconforming way. Take things that are masculine that make you happy, that you're reclaiming in a way because you may not have been allowed to do/be them before. Fill your gender with the ideals and aesthetics you like. You are fundamentally changing manhood by being a man, by being a different kind of man than any other man. If there are 4 billion men on the planet, there are 4 billion different 'microgenders' of man.
Seems silly to write off an entire 4 billion people as inherently evil and incapable of either goodness or change. It's just illogical. For me, that's enough to discard the idea wholecloth. If it doesn't make sense, I'm not wasting my time with it. That's not an ability everyone else has easily though, so you take the time you need. Try to look at yourself as objectively as possible, as an outsider. As you transition, have your actions become more evil? Are you committing sexist acts? Have you literally betrayed all the women you know somehow? Do you feel yourself becoming less kind, less patient, less interested in equality or the preservation of life? I'm betting, since you're nervous about it enough to ask, that none of those things are happening to you. Do not let yourself be gaslit into believing you are becoming something you're not. Look at your actions, your words. Look at your values and how you live up to them. If you don't see any sudden discrepancy, then you know anyone who tells you you're becoming evil by becoming a man is straight up lying to you. They're projecting an idea onto you that doesnt fit reality; trying to put a round peg in the square hole. Be curious, be objective. Do not be misled, and for those who try to mislead you, hit them with a chunky block button.
#transblr#transandrophobia#long post#sorry it took a while to answer anon i wanted to think about this before responding#feel free to reblog
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