#but it doesnt make any of them less guilty
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I didn't like Mekt much but I do hate seeing him only utilized as a villain, as if Legion Worlds didn't happen.
Where is the Mekt who admitted that he was wrong to let his loneliness and jealousy dictate how he acted? Where is the Mekt that worked to be better? Where is the Mekt who welcomed Ayla home and put himself in harms way to help her save their parents farm? Where is the Mekt that delighted at the idea of seeing Garth again and was sad to hear he wasn't really coming back?
I don't know. Maybe it's just me but Mekt works so much better as a character of redemption and reconciliation than as one who stays bitter and antagonistic. He's more interesting that way
#this is just about post zero hour mekt i dont know much about other mekts'#losh#legion of super heroes#mekt ranzz#inkytalks#AND I AM NOT EVEN SAYING YOU AHVE TO LIKE HIM#OR THAT HIS SIBLINGS *HAVE* TO FORGIVE HIM#this still works if THEY are still bitter to HIM for what he did#BECAUSE THEY WOULD HAVE A RIGHT TO BE#but he doesn't deserve the watered down one dimensional asshole characterization I've seen in a few fics that are ABOUT pzh#my ideal rannz sibling dynamic is ayla being bitter and hostile to mekt garth being wary and hurt and at first unable to be around mekt#while mekt himself just feels so guilty for what he did and desperate to make up but willing to give them however long they need#even if that means he doesnt get to be in their lives ever again...#and then eventually they fall into a comfortable normal that is still not fully recovered and still bitter but they can#have breakfast togther without incident#they can talk about things like the weather or town gossip#they can work together on the farm in comfortable silence#ayla slowly grows less suspicious of mekt and begins to trust him a little more#garth stops feeling like mekt is going to lash out at any given moment and can spend time around him alone#things arent great and they probably wont ever heal all the way their relationship will always be strained#but he's trying and thats all they care about#and things are kinda sorta okay
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writing this out to work through being guilt tripped:
yesterday, my aunt from new york was visiting. to see her, i’d have to drive total of two hours round trip. i was having severe gastrointestinal issues yesterday morning, and honestly, i forgot she was coming, and she’s turned into just as much of a hyper conservative christian weirdo as my mom, so I said no to coming down as driving while nauseous and in pretty bad stomach pain only to be be interrogated over my appearance, life, and politics sounded like the worst time possible.
my mom calls me this morning to as why i didn’t drive down. i told her the ways i was sick. what comes next is ten minutes of her saying how hurt she is me and my brother never want to see her family yet we make all this time for dad’s side, and why don’t we want to see her family and etc etc etc. So despite feeling like shit, despite not wanting to see her family at all because they’re all mostly awful, and despite not wanting to speak to her specifically, I’m still sitting here feeling guilty as fuck.
Why? Why should I feel guilty? I don’t like these people (other than my aunt who I do but she’s said some things that have given me a familial form of the ick) and if they weren’t blood related, I wouldn’t give them the time of day, and yet just a few minutes of my mom whining about how I’m not spending time with her family and how much that ‘hurts her’ makes me feel like I kicked her dogs.
#jacq life#it doesnt matter what i tell her either#no matter what it'll start a fight#so i just sit and listen and make it clear im annoyed#also i like dads side of the family more but i only see them once every other year#but that doesnt matter#any time spent with them is time not spent with her which is unacceptable#well at least now i feel less guilty and just more irritated than anything#my mom looks for reasons to fight for any reason and i need to remember that#she wants to make you feel miserable to make her feel self-righteous or to make herself feel better or like the victim#its how she's always worked and always will work because shes a toxic abusive individual#with no self worth outside of being controlling as shit over the people closest to her and making them feel like shit#so the best thing to do is not respond to not give her ammo#anyways
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ill be like I can totally make a lighthearted post mentioning a kink i have and i wont even freak abt it. and then i freak abt it
#its not even one of the ones i normally freak abt. fml. fml. its spreading. eventually i wont even be able to say Strals exist without going#into system shutdown or something. this sucks#this is also why i have so much trouble posting on my nsft is ill go over there and be like. Id love to **** some ***** and then i get#terrified. so i dont#my pfp over there is literally. **** ******* ** * *** but i go over there to post abt how i want to **** * *** and im like that is deviant#i cannot be saying that in front of my followers. who dollowed my nsft blog. where i list the things im into . and my pfo is * **** *******#** * *** so its not like theyd be HORRIFIED if that came up#but idk... i worry ppl dont read my dni over there. bc usually they just follow me after seeing that one post which doesnt rly mention any#of the ones im weird abt. except for like kind of it does but whatever its fine i cannottt freak out abt that post its existed for like.#months now. sigh. its all just a bit embarassing which sucks#“mdni”#IN A MASSIVE WAY. idr if any minors still r here if im still muts with any....#its just like. IDK i either feel a bit silly posting on it and its just mildly embarass Or i send myself into hysterics over how im an evil#person bc i like. well i cant say. obviously. but yk. stufffff. that i am into. I HATE TALKING ABT IT BC IT MAKES ME SOUND LIKE AN EVIL#PERSON AND LIKE. its not anything like. UGH. im not into kids or animals 👍👍👍 obviously. and idt its that bad the things im into some of#them r like basically baby shit like ohhh woww youre into *********** and yet even that i cant talk abt it bc im like um im going to be#smited by god and sent to hell or soemthing and actually i only thing its normal bc im a disgusting weird freak and everybody would kill me#immediately if they knew also im an evil person? its like. UGHHHH.#and the other stuff is. less 'mainstream' which is even scarier but ig in a way ive been More open abt it which is kind of funny. looks at.#but even then i dont rly go in detail bc yk. Stuff. im just like lol they r the way they r bc of how i am. and then i walk away forever#idk. ive been feeling so guilty over that specifically like. UGH. its not like. ugh. i rly cant talk abt it without it being obvious and im#scared byt im also like Compelled to talk abt it so ppl dont think its worse but im also compelled not to bc thats like oversharing i guess#as if thta isnt All i do on this fuckass blog. no matter what i do i lose. i hate my brain so badly i wish i could judt get over it and jus#be like yep these r the things and not have to like over clarify and explain and disclaimer everything and stuff . idk. it suck#mdni#the quotes didnt take it to the top like they used to. kms
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me when i try and ignore a hyperfixation i’ve had for 2.5 years … and it doesnt work!!!!! who could’ve expected that ………….
#dies. also VENTING AHEAD sorry i ended up venting in tags. SO YEA VENTING TW BE WARNED!!!#yk what i’ll say it. its the#fucking d s m p#im spelling it that way so hopefully this wont show up in the tag. if it does sorry to ppl who got here from it#but.#i WANT to be over it i want to not like it anhmore#bc it does not help my moral ocd one fucking bit#why does it not help my moral ocd u may ask?#bc it is very controversial and has many ppl in it that are legitimately bad ppl and *points at ppl saying if u like d s m p youre a bad pe#and like . That doesnt help my moral ocd (which is obsessed with being a good person at all times and if im not then i am evil)#my hyperfixations are part of me and i cant just rip them out#its lik a tree grew its way in me and now if you rip it out i die#weird analogy but i dont really care#if one of my followers decides to unfollow me bc of liking d s m p. i understand#and f jfjemenfm why couldnt my brain latch onto like .#her mit craft#or somethjng#????#i wouldnt feel guilty ofer liking that#well . maybe i would but probably less idk#and i feel guilty interacting with any fan content of the d s m p#even just liking a post related to it makes me feel bad#and like ejrkfjfj this#i just wish i didnt like itever in the first place#idek how i got into it#but i did#aughcjekdjd#sorry for venting but . yea. i didnt intend for it to be one but apparently my brain wanted that. so#also dont expect me to go posting d s m p content after this cus.. im not#i purposefky never talk about it because if i do the demons (my ocd) will end me for it☺️☺️☺️☺️
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taking care of my friends chickens was fun for the first 2 days and now suddenly almost half of them are dead and there is a racoon staring me down and i am oh so scared
#i am so scared of wild animals#genuinly#so at least now i know the bastard who has been killing them has been#doesnt make me feel any less guilty#there are 5 chicken shaped holes in my heart fr#friend already paid me to watch the chickens i will be sending a chunk of that money back#because i did not do a very good job watching them#clearly#since 5 of them are dead
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Hatchetverse - OFFICE LORDS & QUEEN (Design Concept)
BONUS: Tinky and Blinky without glasses
WIGGLY
- Looks like Paul but green and with unkempt hair. Also if Paul was even more snarky & sarcastic, slightly more intimidating, and an even bigger asshole. Just less passive in general. He can hide it well though, after all he's sly and calculated. He's got high leading office businessman charisma, the type to get all the good deals. Comes off as manipulative and condescending.
POKEY
- The co-worker who listens to music on max and ignores everyone on purpose. Worst part is, people can hear whatever it is he's listening to. Impatient, standoffish, easily annoyed and highly dramatic. He looks like Bill if he had Solomon's personality and demeanor. The most unapproachable of the bunch. Embodiment of eye-rolls and side-eyes. Definitely the type to look at someone with full disgust and judgement and will make a show of it.
BLINKY
- He's definitely the office gossip. The kind who always looks over people's shoulder and take a peak at people's computers or phones. Also the one who stalks people's social media and uses their info as blackmail. Definitely an eavesdropper and the one standing around and watching. May also have zero filter in what he says, sometimes making people uncomfortable; To his enjoyment.
TINKY
- This guy definitely gives off "Pepe Silvia" energy. Has watches on both wrists, maybe even pocket watches hidden in his pockets. Very messy and disheveled in terms of appearance. He's a very skilled (and demonically fast) accountant though. If "running on nothing but 5 shots of espresso" is an office worker. Definitely the flirt or a charmer of the office; Thrives off of compliments and boasts about and uses it against people.
NIBBLY
- The guy who ALWAYS steals people's lunches and will not feel guilty nor shame for it. Always has a bag of pastries and drinks from any cafe. Will bite and snarl if asked to share. The type who always forgets to turn in work yet doesn't get fired (of course his brothers are biased for each other). His things are everywhere and take up space.
WEBBY
- The one everyone (unfairly) hates. "We used to work with her. Then we fired her." statements from co-workers (brothers). Gives off "mom of the office" energy. Very sweet and patient. And a pushover; The type to stay after hours to clean after everyone (or do the work everyone dumped on her). Looks out for the office type of deal.
🩵💜💛🩷💚🤍
so sorry about this long ass post i just wanted to get all the details i had while designing their outfits HAHAHA this genuinely took way longer than it should because i kept passing out so much 😭
just so everyone knows, i designed these outfits as a concept to what they could potentially wear if they were summoned in an office like ccrp AND what their actors and actresses could wear on stage. so it's like a stageplay costume design concept kind of thing too. so at least all of them ,excluding webby, has the “fuzz” texture on their outfits. reasoning as to why webby doesnt have fuzz is because she’s most likely the only one to fully present as the most human out of all of them to be more approachable and welcoming; not garish and uncanny like her brothers.
also yes, i finally found out curt had bright yellow eyeshadow as tinky so i added it. i gave tinks a stubble too cuz idk i want a 9-5 job reflecting on his face HAHAHA.
#hatchetfield#hatchetverse#starkid#team starkid#starkid fanart#fanart#the lords in black#lords in black#queen in white#wiggog y'wrath#pokotho#bliklotep#tnoy karaxis#nibblenephim#webby starkid#wiggly starkid#pokey starkid#blinky starkid#tinky starkid#nibbly starkid#idle's art#my art#clip studio paint#jon matteson#corey dorris#lauren lopez#curt mega#kim whalen#mariah rose faith
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Ivyyyyyyyy >.< you're the worsttttt(read: BEST) oh my god the thoughts im having abt dilic with a period kink rn. Gawd and he doesn't even know it's a period kink, he thinks it's absolutely normal to do nasty things with his girl while she's bleeding out and feels proud about it that HE can take her pain away
OMG continuing the diluc saga but yan dilic thinks darling's period is the perfect opportunity to finally put his hands on darling. He knows you're in pain so he promises, he's doing this for YOU not him (lies) he'll ease it in gently and make it feel good! Soon darling will forget all about those cramps bc of him him him! He doesnt need to feel as guilty bc he's helping you out.....right? OMG PLS write something abt thissss, it can be any yandere or oc but im going crazy after what u saiddd
Hehe, you're welcome! I began writing this as just a talk, but decided mid-way through to make it a scenario!
a/n: I wrote this before my hiatus and coming back to correct it, I found so many mistakes, it doesn't even feel like I wrote this smh... I did my best to polish it a bit since I can't see myself rewriting it in the future but if you find anything oddly worded just ignore it lol I wasn't myself back then :')
[Warning: Yandere, Sexual Content]
I can just see the cock cogs turning in this idiot's head as he racks his brain about how he can help you. Clearly, you're in pain, but no matter how many more times he calls a physician to have a look, they just keep waving off his concerns. It's normal, they say. You're healthy. That's what everyone has to go through.
And yet he sees you writhing and crying in pain—it's breaking his heart!
Pillow pressed to your stomach, tears in your eyes that you can't blink away fast enough before they fall. You're especially irritable, but it hurts him more when you whine and complain; Diluc wanting to help you now more than ever. He's already gone through the usual stuff, the imported water bottles from Snezhnaya and the chocolate from Fontaine. If you utter so much as a craving, he has the servants scramble to get it to you. Nothing is too expensive or too hard to get. You could have asked for the heads of your enemies, and Diluc would have brought them to you with ribbons and glitter if that had helped with your pains.
But alas, it doesn't.
It's been three days, and his nerves are raw, the bags under his eyes dark, and the burden of your health weighs heavily on Diluc. He can't see how things will ever get better. The other times you were on your period were conveniently skipped by business trips, so this is hitting him full force.
"Exercising might help," one of the maids suggests as he forces himself to consult someone more knowledgeable than him.
"Sometimes, my wife likes a little stimulation to alleviate the pain," a vintner chuckles, winking at Diluc as the word of his helplessness spreads. And suddenly, inappropriate ideas get stuck in his head, making him blush like a young lad in love.
»»———————— ♡ ————————««
Taking a deep breath, Diluc raised his hand to knock on your bedroom door. It was terribly late, the servants asleep and only the eery flickering of his candle guiding him through the night. Most likely, you were tugged in and fighting for your well-deserved sleep, so he hesitated, fist hanging in the air before slowly dropping it to his side.
What he was about to do was not only foolish but also filled him with the same burning in his body as using his vision did. He could feel the warmth sweep over him from his head to his toes, the latter curling in his shoes while most of the heat was throbbing between his legs, aching to connect with your warmth in a less-than-innocent way.
However, these feelings were nothing compared to the agony of the last few days.
If this was what he had to do to help you alleviate the pain, he would. If it was for you, Diluc would do anything in his power, whether to protect or help you. If he had to become a mere plaything so you'd be freed of the pain, then his concerns were a small sacrifice for all the good he was going to do.
Brushing his hair back, Diluc took a deep breath, reminding himself there was nothing wrong with wanting to help. If the method the vintner suggested worked, everyone would be happy. And if not, he'd keep searching for ways to free you of the pain. Turning the key in the door lock, he pulled it out before slowly entering your room, ensuring he could give you two the privacy needed in this situation.
To his surprise, you were still awake.
You made a half-hearted attempt at a greeting, but when you noticed it was him, you only scoffed, turning away. It hurt when you gave him the cold shoulder so callously, but Diluc knew you were the one suffering at that moment, not him. He could forgive you for being dismissive of him. Your bedside lamp was still on, and he could see you clutching a pillow to your belly, his own stomach cramping up with remorse, even though, logically, he knew it wasn't his fault. He loved you as you were, the good and bad days, your misery becoming his own much too easily these days.
Setting down the candle on your table, he walked over to you. But not before locking the door from the inside, just so he could give himself a few more seconds before his approach. Every step cost him a lot of discipline, being near you never having been this hard. Even when he looked confident around you, Diluc only ever felt weak. You made him vulnerable. Desperate. Longing for your love and affection was all he was allowed to do, so even just watching your chest rise and fall set him ablaze.
Pushing off his shoes, Diluc focused on the little space you left at the edge of the bed. It was the only space he could see that was reserved for him, as he didn't deserve to share your bed, in your opinion. Yet, when he climbed in, pulling the cover over himself and snaking his arm around your waist, he was enveloped in your scent, your hair tickling his skin as he breathed in deeply. Had he known that heaven was hiding so closely to him, he might not have waited so long to come and see you.
"What are you--" you complained, pushing yourself away from him. But Diluc's hand had already wandered beneath the pillow, feeling the hot water bottle you kept secured there, only to replace it with his palm. He was just as, if not hotter than anything the servants could procure for you; his body temperature naturally elevated from his vision. It wouldn't burn you, but with his hand hugging your lower belly, it was much more effective and fitting than any appliance might be.
And you fell for it, even if just for a split second.
For a moment, you leaned into the comfort of his palm, the pain vanishing in the blink of an eye. Diluc even caught you sighing briefly before you came to your senses, jolting and pushing away from him, only to get stuck inside the blanket and pressed up against him. Diluc couldn't help but grin, having read your actions before they even occurred to you, but of course, this was a serious matter, so he quickly composed himself.
"H-Hey!" you yelled as his hand drifted lower, his face burying into the nape of your neck. He wasn't there to dilly-dally but to be of service. To help you in your time of need. By the time Diluc pressed his lips to your skin and his fingers between your legs, you understood his intentions as well, perhaps misinterpreted, but clear as day.
He was going to fuck the pain away.
If exercise and stimulation helped others, maybe it would do the same for you. His fingers were met with warm slick, your body flinching when he moved over your clit. Perhaps his calloused hands weren't made for caressing and soft touches but for teasing and stimulating. Judging by how puffy your lower lips were, worked up from days of rubbing your legs together and your panties aggravating them mercilessly, you were in dire need of his help.
"Don't fight it. You're not alone in this," Diluc reassured you as you squirmed in his hold, biting back the salacious sounds of pleasure you were keeping from his ears. You were so mean, keeping every little taste of appreciation from Diluc, knowing how much it meant to him. But he'd endure. Even when your ass ground back against his cock, making it incredibly hard to not focus on his needs as well, he'd put you first in all of this.
When he slipped his pointer and middle finger towards your entrance, a tremor went through your body, a gasp slipping out from between your lips. Diluc never knew how easy it was to get inside another person, greeted warmly and happily by your hole clenching around his fingers.
His kisses became more fervent against your neck, teeth snapping out as he felt like he was losing himself in your scent and warmth. The pushes of his hips against your ass became faster, your cheeks fitting so well around his shaft. You yelled at him to stop, but he barely heard you through the sounds of your sloppy, wet cunt, blood mingling with eager juices to allow him more reach inside you. It was almost as if he could hear them beg for him to go deeper, which just wasn't possible with his knuckles in the way, no matter how much he tried.
Forgotten was the pain as pleasure raked its claws through both of you, and yet, Diluc still heard you whine and sob as he scissored his fingers through your inside. It wasn't enough. He opened his eyes he didn't know he had closed, staring at your expression curiously. All he saw was anger and disgust, your teeth bared and ready to snap, while he could feel your nails digging into his arm. And yet, when he found your eyes, he saw a very different version of events. Lust, desire, longing. You wanted more, and Diluc wouldn't refuse such a request.
Slipping a leg between yours, he pried them apart, spreading you open wide. You gasped, squirming and trying to cut off his access, but Diluc only had to lean back to steal your balance, your body reliant on his while he gained more space on your bed. The hardest part was freeing his cock from the restraint of his pants, the fabric soggy with both your juices as well as his own pre-cum pearling off the tip of his engorged cock.
Nothing could have prepared him for the feeling of your wet cunt greeting his eager cock. No imagining of this situation could have come close to the throbbing heat, your walls convulsing around his fingers in eager expectation. Diluc placed his tip against his fingers, planning to slip them out and take the opening to sink into you, but with how wet the combination of blood and juices was, he felt himself slipping away, kissing your clit instead.
And for the first time, you moaned.
It was the sound of angels and everything nice, and he drew his hips back, trying again to fill you with his cock, missing it just an inch. All good things are three, and when he finally plunged it deep inside your pussy, you weren't the only one yowling in pleasure. No matter what he had imagined his first time with you to be, nothing would ever top the mess he caused between your legs, his cock ready to burst as it pulsated violently inside your equally as ready cunt.
He could feel the waves of pleasure going through you, the shudders in your limbs as he began to slowly press forward, kissing the last few inches of his reach. You remained stiff as a plank, but when he pulled out halfway before sinking in deep again, you were unable to keep your mouth shut, an elongated moan making its way to Diluc's ears, letting him know it was the right thing after all.
Immediately, any hesitation fell off him as he dragged his cock out and sunk it back into you. Fingers retreated to your clit, continuing to slip off and assault the little knob over and over while your walls clenched around his shaft, making you feel every one of his throbs and ridges, the heat between you two almost scorching.
Part of him couldn't believe it worked. That he actually managed to help you with this trick. But he'd have been a liar if he said it wasn't a pleasure for him, too. Diluc could never have dreamed about your proficiency in driving him wild, from your hot, puffy pussy wrapping around him to the improper sounds he had never heard coming from your lips before. The blood kept you so wet and loud down there; it was like you were synching your moans with your pussy, sloppy as they were.
It couldn't have been better, a shudder going through you from head to toe, your feet curling as you gurgled. Diluc wrapped his free arm around your throat, pulling you against him and burying his face in your shoulder as you came hard, juices leaking out, red dripping on the clean sheets with the blanket long discarded.
You were gasping for air as he plunged right back into you, waiting but a mere few seconds of yours before pursuing his own orgasm. Selfishly, but unable to stop. Diluc was already too deep in it, quite literally, your orgasm making your inside tight around him, but it posed no challenge with how drenched you both were.
A strained groan escaped Diluc as he buckled, feeling the first squirts of cum shoot out of him before he drew back, popping out of your cunt and covering it in his cum. His tip got stuck on your clit, as his jizz ejected under the pressure of his orgasm, making you mewl as you were once again stimulated. It would be a mess to clean, but it had been worth it.
You two collapsed, spent and dirty, but Diluc slipped his palm back over your lower stomach, rubbing the collection of juices over your soft skin, leaving a red trail. Kissing the side of your head, he was trying to collect his breath and thoughts, barely able to think straight as the feelings of happiness and his relief kept him in a chokehold.
"Better?" he asked, his voice a blissful rumble as he pulled you firmer against him.
But all he was met with was a cold glare and tears in your eyes. "I-I'm sorry," he stuttered instinctively, immediately feeling bad. What had he done to upset you again? Your teeth were biting into your lip as if you were holding back a tirade of screaming, ready to explode.
His cock twitched between your legs, bloody and so, so wet.
"I'll make it better! I promise! I will definitely make it better," he tried to reassure you, dazed with pleasure as he was, unable to see the actual problem with all of this. Your body convulsed in shock as he pressed his tip upwards again, and you gasped loudly as he sunk his inches inside you. This time, he wouldn't fail to make you feel better. And until then, he'd keep going.
All night long, if he had to.
#diluc#yandere diluc#yandere!diluc#genshin#genshin impact#yandere genshin#yandere!genshin#yandere genshin impact#yandere!genshin impact#yandere#yandere imagines#yandere headcanons#yandere scenarios#yandere fanfiction#yandere writing#yandere stories#yandere oneshots#yandere oneshot#yandere drabble#yandere x reader#yandere x darling#Yandere TW
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Children of Malice
Vierna, Maya, Briza Drizzt, Nalfein, Dinin
redraw/redesign of the Do'Urden family (probably will draw Malice, Zak and Rizzen next)
design notes/headcanons under the cut
i usually just have thoughts about the character as im designing so for a few things i was like 'oh thats a thought' also yes i know children of malice is a CR thing too haha
-i wasnt originally gonna draw 'lolths embrace' since these are just my own designs not visual dictionary but like....facial markings are really cool and so i ended up looking up various spider markings (i only used those specific realworld spider designs for dinin, who i also gave darker marking as opposed to lighter) and briza
-i also prefer the idea that its not actually anything to do with lolth, its just a genetic marking that some have and some don't. also the proximity to magic/faezress theory (?) was cool so there's not a huge meaning here; though i guess im guilty bcus I didnt give them to drizzt or vierna
-maybe zak doesnt have them and neither do his kids which sorta spurs on the heretic theory when its actually just a genetic thing that has no actual bearing on lolth's favour
-the women wear more gold and the men more silver, however the men can wear gold; they just have to be wary with standing out more than their sisters. any given day could be too much and cause for a beating
-nalfein likes jewelry and decorations/makeup and is more flashy when he's away at sorcere. his ears are marked up from training with/lessons from zak, who frequently would smack his ears when he was displeased with him. they blend in with lolth's embrace and he will cover them with makeup or a glamour on occasion. i just got the sense he was somewhat insecure given how he kept challenging zak and was written off by his family as mediocre. i think he liked being at sorcere more than at the house
-drizzt takes out his braids whenever he can. he likes his hair loose
-so does dinin. i think a lot of his appearance is meant to attract attention and establish his individuality
-i've always given vierna bangs and a ponytail BUT i love her braids in the comic so I gave her those too. her hair is unruly, like drizzts. she has a couple visible scars as opposed to her sisters because she trained more with zak. he felt bad about it but a bit relived when she didnt make a big deal out of getting a bit marked up. malice was angry
-maya has markings on her ears, so she doesnt pierce them. she wears makeup but forgets its there, and sleeps in it and wipes it off by accident. since her hair is shorter she decorates with little spider gold clips
-i will die on the headpiece hill. og drizzt oldman swag
-compared to my older art of them (first fanart of the series! i knew i was in when i drew all the siblings lol) i think i changed nalfein most to be less ...square....i hit him w a yassification beam and gave him eyebrows
#clare's art#legend of drizzt#dnd#dungeons and dragons#drow#drizzt do'urden#dinin do'urden#vierna do'urden#briza do'urden#maya do'urden#nalfein do'urden
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this isnt a call out for anyone; i keep getting asked why i even post my opinions on the internet if i dont want to argue whenever i mention how tired i am of people trying to argue with me or proof me wrong
and i just ... for one its bc there are people that have told me they like hearing my opinions bc it makes them feel less alone, its validating to hear that i am not alone and i make them feel less alone (this is a big reason)
then theres the thing .. do you feel good never saying your opinion on anything and just keeping everything to yourself? be it big or small, i tried to do that for years, just trying to crawl deeper and deeper into a hole bc clearly i am the problem and should be able to deal with everything on my own, never say anything, i could be annoying, i could be a burden, and it nearly killed me; i have very few friends and i already spam them enough to feel constantly guilty
and if i did that on some private account ... what use is that, thats the same thing as not saying anything, whats the use of saying anything when no one listens, even to select few, whats the point if others cant find it, there might be people i dont know at all that would find solace in hearing my stupid ramblings about games
its true i lack self control and just tend to talk about stuff when i feel the need of talking, but is that really so bad?
correct me if im wrong but i was never of the impression that posting something on the internet automatically means wanting to debate and argue unless you specifically say or initiate it on someone elses post? like thats why i pretty much always make my own post to complain and dont go on other peoples posts of opposing views, id view the latter as an invitation to argue moreso than the former
when i post some stupid opinion (im talking about harmless personal video game opinions mind you) on my own account who am i bothering, if people agree thats great! if they dont they can just move on- i know people love to discuss and share different opinions but the the ones i most often encounter are ones where its a basically trying to start a fight over whos more right (like theres always one correct opinion to have) or just telling me i am not allowed to feel like i feel-
im aware i cant expect everyone to be able to see a differeing opinion and move on without saying anything, but when i say something, unless its specifically a question, i just do it to vent, to let my thoughts out so they dont slowly gnaw at me, maybe find validation in others also thinking like that (i know i cant also expect everyone to think that way .. i just see it as a form of politeness? sorta?); in all honesty, i dont do it to get told opposing opinions (i know thats maybe a little ... idk, selfish i guess?) bc i usually have seen or heard those already and am saying mine bc i havent seen it before or very very little- what i think is often very much not the majority so the need to say something gets greater the more i see somethign i dont agree with, like an urge to balance it? a call to see if i am alone or not? and much less so to argue or debate over something like that, im tired and exhausted at all times, and have often trouble even getting myself to draw, i dont enjoy fights of any kind, and especialyl so when its about something so completely ignorable like a game opinion i only said bc i wanted it out of my head and bc i have seen that the majority seems to be of a different one
like a sticky note on a wall, not an invitation to a political meeting?
maybe this is something i need to work on and get better at, i havent found a way that lets me get rid of my thoughts in a way that doesnt leave me feeling guilty (like spamming my friends) or to gnaw at me (not saying anything, or somewhere no ones gonna hear it)
i know im incapable of shutting up ever (though at least i got a better control over my emotions by now) and i risk accidentally seeming like im inviting people to a fight but i dont know what else to do
maybe its something i horribly missunderstood about the internet, but its my only outlet for that, i dont have anyone IRL to talk to about my interests, maybe its a flaw that needs work, maybe its just a flaw, i dont know :/
#ganondoodles talks#personal#and thats enough personal talk for today#already feeling shitty enough#im also really bad at lying- if some of this seems self centered then .. i guess it is- im sorry?#dont think im ever gonna be a perfect human being#even while trying to better myself#:(
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qin su fix-it where jgy processes what madam qin has told him then immediately goes to confide in his fiancée because he trusts her, knows shes capable, and doesnt want to make their situation even worse
qin su, who knows shes pregnant with their child, is horrified. mostly at the fact that jgs is such a piece of shit that he would rape and impregnate her mother and then forget about it to the point he sanctioned their marriage. then horrified about the fact that her own mother told jgy, not her. finally, horrified about the fact that she is less disgusted by the situation and more distraught, because she loves a-yao and wants to have their child.
suyao immediately pivot to problem solving mode. theyre still going to get married. qin su isnt going to abort their baby. they still love and trust each other - even more so now. qin su is so happy that jgy came to her with this information instead of hiding it like her mother did.
they consult a few texts, and decide that qin su will fake a medical emergency in her third trimester, one that could explain any disabilities their child may be born with. rusong is born mostly healthy, but they know they'll need to watch his development with a close eye. they love their son, even if he is a little slower to speak than other children his age. he is a good little brother cousin to jin ling.
qin su doesnt have any other relationships, even though she gives a-yao permission to covertly court zewu-jun. jgy really is her one and only, even if they cant be together, even if their relationship has evolved into something else now. they have no more children, but qin su's parents dote on rusong.
jin guangshan still dies horribly. qin su helps her husband plan it in a way that doesnt hurt any sex workers, no matter how horrible and catty some of them are, how some of them treated meng shi.
qin su learns all about her husbands past machinations with jin zixuan, su minshan, xue yang, wei wuxian. she doesnt speak to him for weeks over it, even considers running away with rusong. however much she hates it, she remembers how jin guangshan treated him, how everyone still treats him behind his back even now that he is jin-zongzhu. she doesnt like it, doesnt agree with it, but understands how a-yao was backed into a corner and felt that this was the only way to keep himself safe, to ensure a place in their society.
she still feels nauseatingly guilty every time she looks at jin ling and sandu shengshou together and knows its her husbands fault that they have only each other. they love rusong, but he cannot replace jin zixuan or jiang yanli.
she knows that her husband doesnt regret his actions, only wishes they werent necessary to take, if only because lan wangji's suffering hurts zewu-jun, which hurts a-yao. qin su talks her husband down from the manic state he works himself into after chifeng-zun kicks him down jinlintai's stairs.
then she goes to the quarters they assigned to the nie contingent and slaps chifeng-zun across the face, leaving deep scratches behind as she does so. her husband may have been poisoning the mans mind (which a-yao will no longer do if he knows whats good for him) but that doesnt give nie-zongzhu the right to disparage meng shi and nearly kill her husband in such a disrespectful way.
things are a little better in this universe, but not by much. xue yang still cant be controlled. jin ling still gets bullied for being an orphan. mo xuanyu still falls into demonic cultivation. her husband has committed atrocious, unforgivable acts that have qin su sobbing alone some nights, curled around their gorgeous, happy, but simple-minded son.
but nie mingjue lives a little longer. he still dies from qi deviation, held off as long as possible by the hard work of his sworn brothers, but this time he's lucid enough to beg huaisang to let nie zonghui put him out of his misery.
su minshan is not a great sect leader, but he does his best and is a loyal friend to her husband, and always gives rusong a present whenever he comes by jinlintai.
mo xuanyu still has to be sent back to mo village. he still uses the sacrifice ritual to summon wei wuxian to kill his birth family, but this time jin guangyao isnt on his hit list. its fairly obvious to zewu-jun and a-yao that its actually wei wuxian, thanks to hanguang-jun and sandu shengshou's reactions, and the subsequent summoning of a very much still undead-yet-alive wen ning who was living in a small village in gusu to stay close to wen yuan
(qin su had rolled her eyes when a-yao had stressed about what to do with the fierce corpse in the basement. qin su had taken out the nails herself and asked wen ning what he wanted to do. the poor boy had wanted to grieve his family, give them a proper burial, panicked when he couldnt find a child-size body amongst them. a-yao and qin su spent enough time with hanguang-jun and zewu-jun's young ward who appeared out of nowhere not long after wei wuxian's death to put the pieces together. sizhui loves his ning-shushu very much)
in the end, things are better.
nie huaisang doesnt make for a great sect leader, but with zonghui and jgy to advise him, he manages long enough to revert qinghe nie back to a sect-based succession instead of clan-based succession, and retires to spend his days with art and poetry and never has to pick up a sword again.
wei wuxian and lan wangji get married. they invite sandu shengshou, who yells at anyone who so much as looks as though they may acknowledge the tears on his face. rusong is very excited to have the yiling laozu as an uncle, though wwx's identity is still technically meant to be a secret.
jin ling is named as a-yao's heir. its the only way a-yao can make up for taking away both his parents.
meng shi still gets a whole temple dedicated to her. qin su visits whenever she can to pray to her late mother-in-law.
rusong grows up to be a fairly average cultivator, but he is the light of jinlintai. he loves his parents, and his cousins rulan and sizhui, and adores how much uncle huaisang spoils him.
qin su and jin guangyao still share a bed, are as close as twins, secret conspirators together. sometimes qin su looks at her brother the way a wife looks at her husband and sighs sadly. she doesn't begrudge the days their bed is empty because her brother is sharing one with zewu-jun, because lan xichen makes a-yao happy in the way she once thought she could.
its not the life she thought she'd have, but its one she is content with.
sometimes she goes into their treasure room and sees the faces of strangers trapped in a dagger on one of the shelves.
qin su never touches it. she has no reason to.
#i did not intend for this to be so long but oh well! i guess i had qin su feelings!#dont ask me what the fucking timeline is i dont remember#mdzs#cql#the untamed#qin su#i hope thats their tag and not the one for jgy/sms#suyao#qin su appreciation#jgy friendly#jin guangyao#tw // rape#tw rape
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tpot 14 spoilers
why do they keep doing my man like that what did he ever do to them give him his arms and his happiness back
ok but seriously, donuts been going through some shit the last few episodes it surprises me that one doesnt care for him like at all, at the very least his ability to be multiplied with algebraliens should be interesting like did they just forget about that
also he just straight up disappeared after this scene
like what do you mean everyone is dead, my guys still chilling next to the recovery center (do not prove me wrong >:()
on a more non-fav related note, they are going back to the apartment thingies which is pretty cool, but raises the question whats going to happen with everyone who, well, didnt
-
man they really just broke into and broke his house, let the lil guy have peace after all the adults in his life failed him
makes you wonder where everyone else is though + he also just kind of disappeared after they broke through the floor as well but in my heart of hearts hes still in the cabin having a good time
also wow, cloudyay is probably one of the most unstable teams ever, no ones listening to golf ball, pencils trying to grasp onto any bit of control she can and donut is just constantly getting screwed over fr and pillow is pillow, like the two stable members of this team are winner and yellow face of all people
my hopes is that donut and golfball form some sort of alliance in future episodes, he looked really guilty for ignoring golf ball + the "remember what we talked about" pls let them be friends
yes winner looked quilty as well but there is no prev drama between the two so i care less about that
for voting, i have no strong opinions for either of the teams since most of my favs are on the other ones, so i just picked the two i vibe most with which are marker and basketball
im stilling praying for tree though, may you survive the next elimination
#the power of two#tpot#bfdi#tpot 14#tpot donut#tpot golf ball#theyre the most important ones for me#also love that the cloudyay conflict isnt just internal no the other teams also really hate them#i do like that golf ball is making other friends like yellow face and hopefully donut
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zoeymau cheebs (click for better quality + transparent pics)
some hcs below ^^ also i love how they complement each other so much GODDD
APHMAU SHALASHASKA
- aphmau shows up at phoenix drop’s doorstep pretty much half dead. no one knows where she came from, and upon waking up she doesn't remember who she is, where she's from, nothing.
- vylad carried her here because he knew that garroth was stationed in phoenix drop and he knew that the village was in dire need of help due to it being lordless; however it doesnt get revealed until way later.
- aphmau gets carried into the guard station which is where she resides for a period of time. zoey, who was visiting phoenix drop at the time (she was a wandering 'merchant' of sorts, looking for a permanent place to stay) feels a weird presence coming from her, not magical but also not normal, and decides to prolong her stay, healing aphmau back to health with garroth's supervision.
- aphmau wakes up and is sooo grateful they took care of her and decides that as payment she’s going to help make this mess of a village better (also she has no memory of anything that happened prior or why she ended up here anyway, so it’s not like she has anywhere else to go.)
- so she fixes up the roads and helps remodel some of the houses (i feel like this version of aphmau is much less princess-like and more handy than canon aph) garroth is very grateful for this
- anyway uh i dont actually have a lot of stuff for her since i find aphmau to be somewhat bland?? ig thats bc aph is meant to be jess for the majority of s1 but yeah uhh that needs to change. this aphmau is more rough around the edges, not afraid to fend for herself and those she cares for, but also very kind and compassionate. also very bubbly at times, but around those she trusts. she’s actually kind of against the idea of having guards follow her around all the time when she first becomes lord (because she believes she can do everything on her own), but later realizes that its much better to have backup bc the world is dangerous tm
- anywayz she grows closer to zoey when she moves into her house. she finds her presence weird at first but quickly gets used to her company, and she finds that waking up to the smell of tea everyday is soothing
- she is often sent out to the woods to gather whatever herbs zoey needs for her magicks. this quickly turns into aphmau trying to find pretty flowers to bring back to her pretty wife as a gesture of love friendship. sometimes she gets scolded bc she unknowingly brings back poisonous flowers or something but zoey knows that she does it with the best of intentions and thinks its kinda cute in a way.
- also aphmau brings back zoey pretty items from her travels, usually rings, necklaces, or even pretty rocks. zoey keeps them all in her room and looks at them while working on magicks stuff
- sorta angsty but i feel like aphmau definitely feels guilty for being absent for most of levin and malachi’s childhood. way in the future i feel like she and zoey would either adopt or have a biological kid of their own that they can both be present for, now that aphmau is no longer a lord and zoey is just enjoying her last lifetime with her beloved wife.
- OH AND i find it funny that they end up together since, at least in my canon, irene and zoey were a thing way back when. so like after irene left this plane or whatever and reincarnated as aphmau its like zoey and irene found themselves again in another lifetime (more on that in zoey’s section, which i actually wrote first)
- god i really don’t have much to say abt aph lol uh she’s bisexual (fem leaning, which is why she doesn’t rlly feel anything for garroth or laurence but does get flustered around guys sometimes) and demiromantic (takes a WHILE for her to feel any romantic attraction. again its why she doesn’t feel anything for G and L LMAO)
ZOEY TALTATHEIL
- was a devout follower and close friend of irene 900 years ago. zoey, although she wasn’t part of the divine warriors, was irene’s right hand woman, and would help her with decisions etc etc.
- she was kind of like a guard but not really lol. i do feel as though she began to mess around with barrier magicks as a way to protect irene, despite the fact that it got her exhiled from her home. she’d do anything to protect her.
- they were overall very close, but due to circumstances tm they had to separate. they never saw each other again sadly
- (although there are some books written by scholars that state that at some point lady irene had a certain lady friend who she lived with and shared intimate moments with. wonder who that is :P)
- ((also irene did have a family at some point, and levin is of her bloodline. he has blonde hair and blue eyes, guess who else has blonde hair and blue eyes? garroth ZOEY (and yes also garroth but thats a coincidence imo) so i think they are at least distantly related but very much so regardless))
- enough about irene. in zoey’s long 900~ year life she’s travelled to many regions, learned about many different cultures, and met many people, some who she did settle down with at some point. due to her immortality, however, she outlived all her previous partners and since then has been afraid to settle down with anyone, afraid of losing them to time
- it wasn’t until she met aphmau and levin (and later malachi) that she began to change her mind. she began to raise her children when she was away on lord duties, and she got VERY attached to them. she treated them as her own, and soon became accustomed to the idea of having a family
- she also began to see aphmau in a more romantic light at some point during s1. she didn’t know when the change from platonic to romantic feelings began but it didn’t matter. what mattered was that she had been raising another woman’s children as though they were her very own, cooking for the 4 of them like a happy family, and literally living the life she had always wanted without even realizing it.
- anyways she sleeps with aphmau in her room despite having her own room. she uses her room more as a workspace for her magicks
- also (and this is less about zoey and more about elves in general) i feel as though elves start out with dark colored hair and with the years it slowly lightens up until it’s completely white (doesn’t matter what color; zoey’s just happened to be blonde which is why she has platinum blonde hair pre-timeskip. it obviously doesn’t change this fast, but zoey giving up her immortality did speed up the process by a LOT which is why the change was so drastic in such a small amount of time (for an elf))
- speaking of her immortality, i feel as though it was the main reason that drove her to, you know, actually become a thing with aphmau. they were practically married pre-timeskip but they never really mentioned it, both scared they’d ruin what they had. aphmau being trapped in the irene dimension was the thing that drove her to spend years of her life studying, trying to get her closest friend, no, her lover back; losing her immortality was the final push to make it official. losing her immortality mean that they’d both pass within each other’s lifetimes, which is something zoey had always wanted (that sounds morbid but imagine being immortal and outliving all your loved ones.. i feel as though one can only take so much pain before it turns you crazy)
- anyways enough angst. since zoey has lived so long and has been all over the place, she has countless stories to tell and levin and malachi always loved hearing them. post-timeskip she tells the same stories to the children of phoenix drop in her spare time. she loves being around children and overall just loves caring for ppl ^__^
- as for like sexuality hcs uhh i can’t imagine her as anything but a lesbian lol
#aphmau shalashaska#zoey taltatheil#aphblr#mcd#minecraft diaries#aphmau mcd#zoey mcd#god this took forever to write#im gonna do this w everyone btw. eventually. dont take my word for it but i want to lol#ashe.art#zoeymau
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Todoroki Siblings Dynamic
I would like to talk about dynamic between Todoroki siblings.
Fuyumi & Natsuo;
I think Fuyumi and Natsuo are each other’s biggest emotional support. Natsuo was abandonded by his father since birth and his mother was hard to reach because she later busy with raising and protecting Shouto but Fuyumi was there for there. She always unconditionally love him. She take care of him. She was less like big sister but most like mother figure for him. And for Fuyumi too, she was most likely more comfortable with Natsuo than she is with other members of family. Her father is out of reach, her mother is in pain, her big brother is in pain and his little brother is in pain. She feels guilty for not being able to do anything for their pain but she doesnt have to feel that way with Natsuo.
Not only Fuyumi and Natsuo shared emotional connection and they both feel guilty for not doing enough for their family and again, other members of family were out of reach. Endeavour abandonded them. Their mother was in hospital. Touya died. Shouto wasnt allowed to be close to them. This is why they only had each others for long time. And we can see how they both try to support each others. Fuyumi makes sure that Natsuo having outside life and tell him ‘he shouldnt compare his pain with others because he was in pain too’ in novel and Natsuo forces himself to join family dinners for the sake of his sister.
Fuyumi & Shouto;
Shouto wasnt allowed to interact with his siblings so he doesnt really relationship with any of them but once again, Fuyumi was a lot like mother/sister type of figure for him, just like Natsuo. (Her personality is also like Deku). Fuyumi feels guilty for not being able to protect his little brother, she feels like he is her responsibility, just like how she feels for Natsuo. As if she has to take care of them and protect them as big sister. Its her mission. She stays at home for the sake of Shouto and try to help him from certain distance. Their relationship is natural. Shouto doesnt have any negative feelings for him but he (just like Natsuo) has the youngest siblings/spoiled child energy around her. Their relationship is improving.
Touya & Natsuo;
Touya wasnt happy when Natsuo was born because he was born to replace him so he didnt like him at first but Natsuo being abandonded, just like him, most likely the reason Touya felt relate to him and of course Natsuo’s kind nature. Despite the fact that his little brother is bigger than him, instead of feeling insecure, he still felt more comfortable around him tells a lot.
It is mentioned that Touya and Natsuo were close and Touya would cry on his shoulders. They were a lot like friends but it is actually weird, if we think about it and here’s why; Touya is the oldest and Natsuo is 5 years younger than him. It is really wierd that 13 yeard old seeing 8 years old as equal which is another proof that Touya was mentally regressing. Not just his psychical condition but his mental state didnt improve so instead of his 12 years old sister, he felt more emotionally close to his 8 years old brother who most likely doesnt even udnerstand a lot of things that his big brother was talking about. The age gap is too big for them to be equal and Natsuo (despite being the younger one) has to be the one ‘emotional support’ for his big brother is actually messed up. For Natsuo, his big sister was like a mother who take care of him and his big brother is someone he most likely looks up to and he is the one who has to take care of his big brother. Once again, all of these shows how broken Touya was.
Of course, Touya’s death hit Natsuo a lot. He felt guilty for not really listening his brother and not doing something for him. This is became the reason he cant ever forgive his father, not because his father abandonded him but because what happenned to Touya. In novel, he mentioned that he was too busy for thinking his dead brother that he couldnt focus on alive ones (Shouto etc).
Note; Touya felt ignored by his family and later died and turned into Dabi. I dont think Dabi targetted Natsuo, he couldnt know that Natsupo would be there since he is rarely at home. It was concidence that Natsuo was attacked. Dabi’s mission is to destroy Endeavour, not really his family. Actually i think he is ignoring them on purpose because they ignored his pain when he was child too.
Natsuo & Shouto;
At first, Natsuo also felt jeolous of Shouto because it lead Rei to neglect her children but it mentioned in novel that he changed his perspective when Shouto got hurted by boiling water, he said he couldnt forget Shouto's screams from that night and feel guilty for not doing something for him (kinda edit). Besides that, there is not much to say about their relationship since they didnt interact much. Shouto wasnt allowed to interact with them and also Natsuo were dealing with grief of Touya and he most likely wanted to be far away from Endeavour as much as possible which means staying away from Shouto too. Natsuo feeling guilty for not being able to protect Shouto but Shouto doesnt mind. Despite not having much interaction, they also have common thoughts about their family. They both dont blame their mother and want to help her. They both view Fuyumi as sister/mother figure and act like spoiled children aound her. They both know who to blame, Endeavour, for the pain of their family. They both dont want to do much with him and try to endure him for their mother and big sister. They both used to look up to Touya (I think Shouto kinda looked up to him too, since he is the oldest). They both kinda healthiely and childishly hate their father. They are similar about a lof ot things and they both are kind natured so they will get along well. Their relationship is improving.
Touya & Shouto;
I mentioned about their relationship in here. They both have so many common points. Literally written to be parallels. Whether they are too opposite or too similar. They were complete strangers but they already have a lot of complicated feelings about each others because of this.
Touya idolized Endeavour and view him as creator of him but this broke him and lead him to destroy him. Shouto hated his father and viewed him as monster but later seeing him ‘change’ lead him to give him a chance. Touya saw his mother as guilty too for failing him. Shouto only view her as victim, even blamed himself for her pain. Touya felt like his siblings failed him but Shouto didnt think about that before since he never really interacted with them, he didnt much thoughts about it. Touya questioned the society of heroes and system that lead Endeavour get away while Shouto only view his father as problem. They both too similar and too opposite, dealing with similar issues which is why they see theirselves in each others and they really dont know how to deal with it.
They both meant to come to and understanding so they both can heal from their traumas and be a true heroes they both always desired to be.
Touya & Fuyumi;
I think this relationship is underrated. They have kinda twin energy. (Well, Touya is like this with every sibling of him, lol).Touya and Fuyumi are polar opposite which makes sense because siblings shows similar type of behavours with opposite personalities since they need to balance each others. Touya was intense, he is the truthteller over and over, in every single moment he would have to talk about his issues while Fuyumi is peacekeeper, she is silent and run away from her issues to that she could keep the peace even it is fake. Which means she would have to ignore Touya too which is why Touya didnt feel close to her and they both didnt but i do believe that they love each others. Fuyumi is still Fuyumi-chan to him, his little sister no matter what. She would call him out to play with him so he wouldnt feel left out. Fuyumi’s relationship with Touya is different than she has with Natsuo and Shouto because she doesnt know how to reach out to him. She play the mother/big sister role for her brothers and she thinks she has to take care of them and protect them and this is the best role she knows but she cant do that with Touya since he is the oldest.
For both Touya and Fuyumi, they thought their family was normal at first. Touya thought training was normal, Fuyumi thought the way her father distance from her is normal. But Touya found out the truth after he was abandonded and he called out his parents for it. For Fuyumi who is just have to watch all of these, her closing eyes and ears is her trauma response, just like Touya who cant hold his intense emotions keep inside. They both loved Endeavour once and gave him many chances. Fuyumi wants to forgive him for her sake but for Touya, for Dabi, it is not even about forgiveness anymore, it passed that point years ago. Years later, Fuyumi wants their broken family to turn into normal ones but she is doing it without actually adressing the problems while Dabi is constantly reminding what is the problem. Well, Fuyumi cant move on if she doesnt adress the problem and Dabi cant really adress the problem and heal without eventually moving on.
And in the end, they both need to come to an understanding. Fuyumi should understand that their family will never be normal but at least she has her family and it is enough. She shouldnt force them to be the family she imagined while Dabi also eventually in the end has to respect other family members’s desire to forgive. I think they both can do that with each others and their family. Because they love each others. Once upon a time, they were the besties, before everything went worse. I cant wait to see them getting over their problems together.
They all have interesting interactions as inviduals. I hope they hang out together at the end. They deserve to be happy together.
#todoroki siblings#todoroki touya#dabi#todoroki shouto#todoroki fuyumi#todoroki natsuo#todoroki family#bnha analysis#mha meta#tw abuse
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.
complaining here because i dont want to burden my friends but still want to collect validation in the form of little pixel hearts
my moms mental state has gotten so much worse and as a result her hoarding is becoming even worse and even more impossible to tolerate. i have tried to have more sympathy about it and to help her with it, sitting with her while she sorts "a box a day" or even just "one thing a day". ive gently recommended she get a new therapist but all she did was change her horse on the SSRI carousel and start smoking weed. i've linked her articles and books and videos, and when she doesnt look at any of them i try to relay to her in conversation what i learned from them when she bemoans "why am i like this?". none of it matters. she just complains that it's "too overwhelming" and she "can't help it" even though she refuses any help at all.
i know it is a mental disorder. i know it is overwhelming. i know it causes her physical pain to get rid of things and at the same time cripples her with guilt to keep it all. but as of right now all we're trying to get her to do is just rearrange the things so that they aren't turning our house into a fucking obstacle course, and she pushes back on that too. like she doesn't want to even organize the piles AS THEY ARE and condense them because she'd rather be "actually throwing things away and putting things away like a human being!"—the thing that she very specifically CANNOT do.
and if we consolidate it on our own? hooooly christ. she goes on a fucking rampage, slamming doors, screaming/sobbing, throwing shit (her shit. it's all her shit). because it's HER stuff and WE touched it and she feels guilty about all her stuff. she STILL talks about when my sister tidied the spice cabinet, convinced that "she threw everything away!" and that was years ago. (my sister is a different kind of insane and probably DID throw a bunch of shit away, but either way all it did was give my mom ammunition for the rest of her life to never do anything.)
this is long enough already so all i can say is that im disappointed in myself for losing more of my tolerance and sympathy. like at this point the only reason i care is because i have to fucking live here since i havent been able to stay employed or move out yet and my mental health is also incredibly bad. but also my mom's becoming much more intolerant and hateful as a human being, which makes me less inclined to keep trying. like she deliberately brings up incendiary topics (usually politics), whips herself up into a cyclone of hatred (every '-ism' you can think of) while preemptively apologizing for things that she thinks that we think about the politics that she "doesn't like talking about" despite blatantly shifting the conversation to bring them up, then devolves into histrionic crying or yelling at us for something she has imagined. this is almost every day. i know she's my mom so im trying but christ alive
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TMAGP EP 30 SEASON FINALE REACTION (SPOILERS)
OH MY GOD IM IN CLASS OK HERE WE GO READING THE TRANSCRIPT I'LL LISTEN LATER
i hate the episode name btw
SAM YOU FUCKING IDIOT SHE'S NOT ANGRY YOU'RE IN DANGER YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKER AAAAAAAA YOU'RE GONNA GET YOURSELF KILLED (also the transcript saying he sounds "ill" i don't like that)
"alice means well but she doesnt really understand" oi celia what do you mean she doesn't understand she got attacked by the same thing sam did
"my head is killing me" i dont think this is a normal headache ALSO IM SO SUSPICIOUS DONT TAKE THE PILLS SAMAMA KHALID COME ON
"all goes to plan" WHAT CELIA WHAT (they say like they're surprised that she's sus)
"ticket officer, not paid enough for this" NONE OF US ARE BUDDY
oh jesus christ colin is gonna end up dead isnt he. and possibly teddy too. both of them acted the same way based on alice saying she was busy
waiy. colin is in the office, but lena and gwen are in the office too?? also lena is gonna end up dead and gwen is gonna feel guilty isn't she
OH NEVER MIND. GWEN YOU'RE ABOUT TO GET FUCKED. I REALLY HOPE LENA GETS TO GO HOME TO HER SPOUSE AND GOES "yeah fuck THAT I'm glad I'm out of there"
wait they KNOW it was one the train??? wtf???? and why is celia so calm about this
"what unit did you say it was?" "Seventeen-" SEVENTEEN RIGHT HERE-sorry I'm coping with jeonghan's enlistment date okay
CELIA WHAT THE FUCK WHAT DO YOU MEAN CALL IT A HUNCH. GIRL ARE YOU SERVING THE EYE?????
"we want your teeth" JARED HOPWORTH??? IS THAT YOU????
now who the FUCK is this custodian hold on checking the VA list-ok nvm not breekon or hope i was wondering bc. yknow. custodian. maybe a reference
this custodian is so real he's like "yeah no this ain't any of my business you do you boo"
LMFAOOO THE TAXI DRIVER THINKING SAM IS CHEATING ON ALICE WITH CELIA AND THAT SHE'S GOING TO KILL THEM BOTH
THE CUSTODIAN JUST YELLING "SHUT UP" IS TAKING ME OUT OH MY GOD AND THE KNOCKING ACTUALLY STOPS
get archivisted bro
oooo okay so hilltop centre got a bloody history. but also who is this "he" that hired the custodian? also the fact that he refuses to come in the daytime is very interesting because usually people would find it less creepy at daytime but he seems to be more comfortable at night?? which is giving the dark but ok
poeple ARRIVED???? NO WAY THEY CONFIRMING THE CRACK AT HILLTOP ROAD CONNECTS HERE ALONG WITH MOST PROBABLY OTHER UNIVERSES
"why the outfit was so mismatched, why the clothes were been pinned in place" okay this is kind of reminded me of the stranger for no particular reason????
OH THE FUCKING OWNER DIED OKAY
SORRY AS HE TURNS TO CONCRETE?????? WHAT????
a precipice????? sorry is there a whole-ass different world??? also celia wtf do you mean "almost"??? yeah sam its about time you asked her more questions
Sam's headache is not comforting me i don't think its normal WOOOOOO CONFIRMATION THE UNIVERSE-JUMPER CELIA
ahhh there it is. she was using him as a balance because she hoped getting him close enough to the magnus institute would make him enough a balance.
IS THE ARCHIVIST STOPPING HER???? ALSO SAM WHAT THE FUCK WHY ARE YOU JUST TELLING HER TO DO IT????
god sam you fucking idiot i love you. she betrayed you and lied to you and yet you still fought the archivist for her. also alice coming here worries me because i think she has a close connection to the magnus institute too and she might get sacrificed
NOT AGAIN???? OH MY GOD DID HER PARENTS DIE IN HILLTOP ROAD?????
gwen you're gonna get yourself and everyone killed oh my god
...see i dont know if i trust that now. i know celia hesitated but who's to say she wouldn't take the opportunity to push sam? or even not done anything when she had the chance to save him? i mean...i guess she did say "even though..."
MAN. SAM. I KNEW YOU WERE PROBABLY GONNA DIE FIRST BUT DAMN. STUPID MAN. I LOVE YOU.
i dont think sam is dead i mean celia fell through the rift and lived, who's to say sam couldn't do the same? the question is, which universe did he fall into? and will celia tell alice the truth about what she was planning?
mainly, though, i need to know whats going on with colin because WHAT DID HE MEAN WITH FR3DD1 WHAT HAPPENED. AND WHAT IS GOING ON WITH TEDDY.
#tmagp#the magnus protocol#tmagp spoilers#tmagp ep 30#tmagp season finale#tmagp ep 30 spoilers#tmagp reaction
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u were talking abt spanking a while ago and i wanna add that one of my pet peeves when it comes to spanking in a yandere fic is that it usually turns sexual/enjoyable and the tipping point for that is the reader being wet. i feel like they dont know that getting wet doesnt necessarily mean reader is enjoying it, it just sometimes happens when theres stimulation to that area, like an erection. lowkey just wanna read discipline scenes without any dirty bc its one of my favorite tropes but nooooo 💔
i understand what you mean! unfortunately for me one of my favourite things in a yandere fic is the reader dealing with the fact that maybe, perhaps, what is happening to them is becoming so normalised and almost comfortable that maybe they do like it? maybe it would be easier to like it? so this happening doesn’t really bother me personally!
i also think a lot of writers do get a little frightened of writing and publishing something that is very openly and obviously non-consensual in a non-sexy way. i’m guilty of this too, i think - because as well as writing yandere type things, we write romance, and we can’t help but want to add a little romance into our horror to almost make it more palatable? like we’re afraid of being cancelled or something and adding those extra little touches of ‘reader starts to enjoy it’ makes it feel less scary to publish.
i wish i had recommendations for you or anything anon but i do see where you are coming from! i simply cannot help that i love the in-the-process-of-acceptance stage of yanderes in my own fics!
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