#but im sooo sorry this is the Only way
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I just feel like people don't get me.
"oh he groomed her" "oh her life was so terrible" "she was trapped until he died and it freed her"
Do you guys forget he was my dad? He loved me with everything he had and still does and would do anything EVER for me. He would always protect me and never ever hurt me or lie to me. He never lied
How could you look at Silco and not see the absolute love of my life? How could you see what he's done for me and not see anything but love and dedication and loyalty? If anything, I wasn't a good daughter to Him.
#system babbles#im so frustrated#jinx#silco#arcane#introject#actually plural#fictive#i just my interpretation is correct inherently and i understand why people do what they do think what they think ship etc#but im sooo sorry this is the Only way#jilco#only
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In the world I love
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In a different world
#vanitas no carte#vanoé#doomed yaoi save me...save me doomed yaoi#play on the opening song + visual sequence + the fact that vanitas could only ever be happy in an alternate universe also#+ the other fun little fact we learn about him from episode one#i have complex feelings about this anime#its pretty damn fucking good#but im a leeeeetle iffy about the way it developed the female characters.....they had potential and i was actually excited to#to see some good solid female characters even the respective romances with their l/i's felt good at the start#not jeanne obv. they fucked up a perfectly good woman and her whole dynamic with v could have gone sooo well without the reall#really forced flirting behaviour.... i liked the more serious relationship they had it made me actually not hate what they had at the start#but yknow. whatever. sorry about going off about another ship on this but im just....i love jeanne a lot. i wish they didnt do her so dirty#my girl deserves better than this asshole#you want white/black dynamics??? let her get married to domi and then we can talk#i enjoy this show and i enjoy vanoe a lot#very yuriyaoi if you ask me#my art
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What a worthless animal
#oc: siggy#first image is babies attempting to figure out their ideal limb count#anyway having a bit of a 'never trust how you feel about your life at 3am' moment but i think the artfight brain plague is beginning to hit#dont worry about me im fine#just feeling a lil bad about maybe not being able to clean up the revenges i would like too and theres sooo many i didnt even get to sketch#and am only at like 50% of how much i 'scored' last year so it makes me feel a lil eh like im not doing as much#but ultimately i did way way more revenges even if it mightve been a mistake LMAO so at least thats something#although i feel bad cause i didnt even revenge some of the coolest ones i got!!! augh!!!!!!!!!!#ah well beetles dont have to deal with these problems we should be more like them#if you read my tag rants sorry about the lore on how my brain works you should check out the wooly chafer beetle
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personal opinion warning i don't think ragatha is the ""mom friend"" of the circus i think she just has some extremely dogshit coping mechanisms for being trapped there. tags rant go !
#like no shade to those who call her that#i just#gooseworx had said some funny things abt her before#“wishful thinking” abt an unabstracted kaufmo#what she said to pomni not being entirely true#pretty much being only for deescalation#she is so dealing with this by putting on a happy face all the time#hell glitch has described her as being “the happiest little optimist” and that “she's fine! see shes smiling!"#all im saying is#she is sooo coping by putting on a constant happy face#& putting others before her#which may involve some bullshitting at the price of her own welfare#she's not your “mom friend girlboss” she is FUCKED UP and is COPING with that fucked up-ness in a shitty way!#she would cry if she was only known as the “mom friend�� !#sorry im someone who's been fixated since january and i have some Opinions on these characters#the amazing digital circus#tadc#flippy.txt
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as of ten minutes ago we are officially Jobless™️. my sign to retire early and devote the remainder of my existence to writing toxic old man yaoi
#pennforyourthoughts#personal#someone rb this with silly tags i feel it deserves some levity#warning: novel-length tags lmfao#THEY TOLD ME TODAY MY LAST DAY IS FRIDAY? that's only two whole workdays for me HELLO??#knew it was coming bc they let my friend go two weeks ago and he had more seniority than me but jfc#at least let me ride out the contract till november. WHY. i JUST went back to uni i need money goddamn it#full disclosure tho i haven't been able to stop laughing bc so much of the surrounding circumstances are insanely funny to me#1) i was LITERALLY at a job fair yesterday and I almost considered not going bc I was so damn tired#surprisingly made some really great connections so ty universe now i have people to poke in the coming months#2) i switched from part time to ft course load at the last second and have been regretting it ever since but if im to be unemployed then#MAYBE now I can actually handle the uni workload :D#3) when my boss called me she asked how ive been and i told her i was sooo sick last week and got into a car accident#that same day omw back from uni (universal karma for skipping class for my health ig)#THE WAY SHE PAUSED ON CALL IS SO FUNNY IN RETROSPECT. was prolly thinking fuck. now i have to add to this#she literally went “omg im so sorry...anyways i have bad news”#im not even lying when i say i was GIGGLING through that whole call she was so concerned#love her bc she genuinely tried to fight for me and is the reason i wasn't let go two weeks ago but man. the timing is impeccable#also don't think i get any unemployment benefits bc i was temp contract and my situation as a whole is a bit complicated so YAY :DDD#the way i ran to my bestie to spill the tea & we're over here like 🤝 fired buddies 🤝 time to speed run job interviews while juggling uni
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the AMOUNT of food i have to eat to retain any amount of attention to do tasks is ungodly but this is really the only way
#like yeah if i have to do something for multiple hours i will eat until i feel sick and more cause#this is literally the only way to stimulate my brain im sooo sorry stomach im insane#really sad that nothing works as well but this is really the best i got
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I don't care if Oasis reunited it should have happened to the Kinks instead.
#there is only one pair of brothers who fucking hate eachother that i really care about to be honest#except according to dave theyre getting along lately but theres still no way rays 80 year old ass is getting back in the studio with dave#sooo funny when a few years ago everyone was like Its gonna happppppeennnn.... it could happen#Im sorry but I already told you the kinks arent coming to fuckass oklahama
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Something really funny that's occurred to me is the way Joe talks about Maccie is like she's some catastrophic event that happened to their family "I can't believe she's been here that long." / "Everything's been different since she was born" / "Everything changed." / "She changed everything."
And it's just rlly funny to me. I want to up the dramaticness of his words at some point. And anyway, he's talking to the Samurai/Ronin for the first time and I'm wondering the impression he's getting lmao
Joe is certainly expressive to me, but only when he's given the chance. And I think w Ronin, he just started letting a lot of stuff out bc thus guy is gonna go on his way anyways.. but then he's like wait!!! Actually let me go?? For a little? (Platonic yearning so bad)
Ronin like 》^. "I suppose.. Alright, curious karate man, I'll accompany you a little longer."
Or something I'm messing around UGH
#the reason everything changed is bc joes mother passed away either shortly after Maccies birth or during#that started the strain w joe and sr but they also had.. her yk? its just sillay#dysfunctional karate family ily <3#sr isnt a terrible father he is just narrow sighted and firmly believes he knows best. he doesnt give his kids the room to grow- but he#really loves them. he just wants to protect them in a way i think.. he just lost his wife and i think that made his parenting way more#overbearing. buT ALSO. JOE JUST BEEFS W MACCIE BC YK SJXNXNX theyre siblings#espexially when they were younger. teen joe is sooo funny to me. teen angst ft this baby i dont want in my room KGLZLGKXMVKKC#in current theyre much much closer and Joe has remained Maccie's favorite person. but Joe still gets really annoyed / tired of her sometime#SRRY ugh ily karate family#also also ronin and maccie dynamic so real. i like ronin being patient with children. except maccie is wayyyy more antagonizing to him than#like my oc the lost girl. so fun!!!! sorry#karate maccie#rh head canon#< new tag#karate joe#sr isnt a bad dad on purpose agenda. sr could have the possibility to apologize and fix things one day.#maccies only ever known this version of her father and she doesnt have the capaxity to try and forgive him for certain things joe will#maccie is the golden child but she is also the problem child. she uses her favor to her advantage and to rile up her dad sometimes#just bevause she can and she has a little bit of a problem with him sometimes bc.. you know? shes a very ambitious teen and she doesnt wsnt#to be shackled..... and she doesnt like thinking of Joe as that way and UGH#i love them im normal#to elaborate a tiny bit more i hc joe as having chronic fatigue like myself. hes low spoons and he pushes himself despite it.#but his disability holds him back sometimes snd its like.. you know? he doesnt want to be the weak memver of the family so he keeps pushing#but he also cares about karate too. its not something negative to him. and stuff. even if its hard. its avtually good for his body / health#when he doesnt overexert himself anyway
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WE GOTTEM BOYS
#hate my home lcs lowkey. or well thats kind of strong but they reorganized everything sometime recently and its soooo unintuitive#this was on the shelves but i couldnt find it -- which before i also couldnt find 1 and 2 so i had to go behind the counter#but the guy this time got confused and was trying to set up a pull etc but im living at school so it would only be over breaks blah blah#way too complicated a concept for them and my mom was like double parked outside xyz#thankfully the other guy stepped in and just got me one off the shelf which again. horribly organized im so sorry. before they had it split#up by brand and now they dont but the store is segmented weird and their alphabetical is so stupid like AWW is under W not A which i checked#but lowk W is kind of hidden and then they have a whole section of like variants thats kind of in the way??? just its NAWT the move guys#also i just feel like theyre generally kind of unhelpful and i hate how the store is laid out sm#its also RIGHT across from the grocery store and has big windows aimed right at the comics selection like guys plssss i do not need the mom#of someone i knew in middle school witnessing me here rn. be so fr#i just like the other one better bc it makes sense and is in this little basement under the target and theyre super friendly and love#talking. i go to look for smth and we make a whole lil conversation nerding out abt multiple things likee#i read saga bc of them lol#i bought me historica hardcover there and the next time i went i mentioned to them i liked ww and they were all like#“omg you need to read historia its sooo good��� like girl I KNOW RIGHT!!! (to the 40yo man)#i mean the one dude there is a total tom king warrior which like oop but hes nice so its okay. let him push some woman of tomorrow i can#handle it lol. anyways like the college one way better but havent been since september bc the AWW drops keep mostly coinciding w my trips#home and all. someday#what was i saying. oh yeah my potatoes are ready bye
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Sylvie: she will ruin all her companion's lives
#bg3#...yes.. she IS one of my dnd characters... idc !!!!!!#i love her sm!!!#she is a drow fighter btw hehe!!#i installed many mods to get her to look the way i know she looks#i am sooo happy w how she turned out !!<333#she is so beautiful and cool HEHEHE#SHE will ruin THEM i say as i am giggling and kicking my feet at anything... ANY of them say to me#esp Karlach and Wyll.. they.. i..#game progress#playing for the first time by myself...#its so over for me i CANNOT stop#this is the only thing i am thinking abt lately#...sorry in advance#her main weapon is a flail... so i found her a flail ASAP!! just need a cooler shield now hehehehheh#her full name is Sylvie Silverblade if you care... she's an ex knight#SORRY IM DONE IDK I JUST LOVE HER A LOT !!!!#baldurs gate 3
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chewing on a shirt
#ive said this what feels like a billion times already benny sooo often says you in such a particular way it drives me insane#like when you're doing the black widow dialogue there's one part where he says i dont even know what to call you... and it's so.#*kicks a wall*#sorry i think i might be the only person to get this way about this line ever. im crazy.
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compilation of what are theee agnesposts of all time. to me.
#agnes i am sooo sorry you were born in the magic apocalypse forest you would’ve LOVED getting your ears pierced at claires#i feel like i don’t talk about her enough but that’s probably because of the way i’m able to talk about pallas#like with them i’m able to actually articulate my thoughts but w agnes it’s just. look at her look at my girl. squeezing her squeezing her.#i always just feel like im stringing random words together and then being like: do you. do you get it.#grief and love and rage and kindness and guilt and tenderness and fear and fear and fear#you get it right???????#she’s the most good character in the story she’s the worst she doesn’t believe in anything she’s the only one of them that believes#in anything. she’s seventeen she’s just a baby.#she’s my special girl and that’s all that matters really ❤️#wip: ghost story#agnes
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Beating veilguard may genuinely get me out of my writing slump because I Need To Fix It
#dragon age#dav critical#crow rambles#sorry for only talking about what i disliked rn i swear i have quite a few things i very much liked#i unironically think that this finaly battle is one of the best in the series#even if it took what? two fucking hours lmao#DEFINITELY a step up from corphyeus#it reminded me of the battle of denerim in a way which is always a win in my book#i do wish we could control companions bc having a similar set up to denerim where you control your companions when youre split#would have been SOOO fun i kept thinking about it#however i do kinda understand not doing that in that end battle bc that was a very VERY long end quest(s)#i dont think ghilinain was the hardest boss in the game which was disappointment#okay im about to yap about spoilers in the tags so. warning yay#anyways I complete forgot about felassan's run until i beat the damn game#credits started rolling and i went “oh. i could have done that.”#i meant elgarnan. not ghilinain. ugh sorry#anyways he has nothing on ghilinain's (the actial one) three headed monster. that shit was HARD#i think i died at least seven times? minimum??#siege of weisshaupt was ALSO a particularly good quest btw even if some of the dialogue was odd#the only boss that i strugged with so badly i had to lower my difficultly was that fucking dragon in the crossroads. what the fuck is its#problem. and that was WITH the blessing of mythal getting rid of its armor. 0/10 worst fucking fight ever oml
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do we like the backlight or
#i finally finished this sort of : |#i only had to paint the clothes but idk y it was so hard lol also i used ref for it but#it looks kinda weird the folds : | ok.. maybe i shouldve winged it like i always do LOL#and the way i harvested the bg from an older pic i made for a zine rip lol cuz i dont have time to draw a bg rn 😵💫#honestly im fine w white bgs but i put Something there so thats a win#i looked at this too long it looks weird to me :( idk how to fix the face :( sad#noah fence but i cant even tag this as.. u kno 🤣#cuz i feel like i draw him sooo far removed from canon 😬 so im like low key embarassed 😳#idk hes a prince to ME ✊😔 im gonna try to finish up the#halloween mads from. so long ago. theres not much left to be done there#and the bgs gonna be white sorry LOL#alulu art
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bam. donut rvb. thinking about him......
[id: a traditional drawing of donut from red vs blue during season 1. he is wearing his armour, but his helmet is off. he has light brown skin, and short curly brown hair that has been bleached blond. he has a scar over the right side of his face, which is shaped like icing on a cartoon donut. his right eye has a reddish sclera and light blue glazed over iris. his left eye is dark blue, and he is posed like he is thinking. a text bubble reads “you guys are colourblind. why would they give me pink armour?” end id]
#my art#trying to come up w not only designs for Everyone but also cute stylised things#like donuts scar looking like donut icing and yeag#specifically bc alienssstufff's artstyle is In My Brain slash pos and im in love w the way heart adds sooo many cute little design details#fun fact the the little exchange between grif and simmons after this line is like 1 of my faves purely bc of grifs little laugh hdfjsg#rvb#rvb donut#rvb fanart#franklin delano donut#Red vs Blue#yeag ok thats all the tagging for now. explodes#FINALLY added the ID lol sorry i forgor...
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if i head the words "jesus" "sacrifice" and "himself" in a sentence again ill scream.
#sorry im back in my anti organized religion specifically white nationalist christianity arc#im always there ofc#but i remembered if any spiritual/religious label applies to me its satanist#with zen and jungian mystic elemts#i use zen as a catchall for the perceived commonalities btwn buddhism hindusm and taoism#but at the heart of it all#im frsure a satanist. not that i necessarily align with tst in every way but#call it my aquarian nature enhanced by my capricorn elements buuut#(my mecury and moon are cap)#(enhancing my aqua sun venus uranus neptune)#but the heart of satanism is the contrarian nature of it.#it is literally an idea that combats common christian interpretation of the bible and the institutions that follow it in the U.S#ultimately jesus didnt sacrifice himself and lucifer did not want to be controlled paternally. even yahweh is flawed. he is an archetype#personally i feel in the human consciousness yahweh/father god/jupiter ETCCCCC learned from that#and his golden child... he probably didnt want to lose another child. JS. probably less of a jesus died so we dont go to hell and more of a#father was sick of losing children#this has strayed from bible concretism bc i do not believe in that#i believe its possible anyone and everyone in the bible was a real person maybe#but ultimately all religious text are archetypal and metaphorical stories#like its sooo funny when ppl say the bible says something or the other and its super literal#like the point... woosh#anyway.#satanism is my jam cause its contrarian and at its core sympathizes with those cast out of privilege#plus the whole i desire an abortion for relgious reasons is not only hilarious trollwise but also like#some peoples bodies are their temples yk?#not me personally but like its valid and that pisses christians off so bad!#and i love pissing uppity nonspiritual christians off!!#i dont hate christians or members of organized religions i have a distaste for the institutions imposing its rules upon nonconsenting people
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