#but im like. not 100% happy. i'm satisfied i would say

[princekirijo]

AAAAWAWAWAWAWA NEW ICON SPOTTED 👀👀👀👀

Eheh YES I said I was gonna draw myself a Halloween icon and I did 😌 pretty happy with myself I find lately I've been struggling to actually finish a sketch I start so to get this done + a bit of rendering is nice!

I wanted to draw Riku in a Halloween costume and thought what would be dress as for Halloween and then thought that's a dumb question there is only one answer 💀

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

/ book 7 spoilers

*politely grabs you by your shoulders* UEUEUEUJQKXNkxnsnnanzndnsmsmfmdmsmdm

hello... sorry... Leona rant... the guys theorizing that Kifaji stops Leona in his dream bc deeply he'd wish for someone to stop him... i think im going to cry. i wonder if him being such a bad king in his dream has to do with his own feelings- meaning he doesn't believe he'd be a good king? Idia explained that maybe Leona purposefully chose his dream to play out in a more realistic way, which would mean having consequences and such... even if it would be painful, he still went with it...

I think you had a post about this iirc, but this rlly pushes me to further believe that what Leona craves is valid recognition— people recognizing him for who he is and what he does, not idolizing him, just valuing him genuinely. I think there in reality he craves more that than the "king" title specifically— that's why the scene where Jack says that "he's not your (the shadows) king, he's our DORM LEADER" felt so special to me, bc Jack is doing exactly that. he's valuing him for being his dorm leader, a title Leona earned for himself. I think that ultimately that'd be more valuable for him than the king title itself, since one "is born" to fulfill that goal (and the whole reason he isn't king is because he was born second, again, things out of his control—) I think that's why this dream Leona isn't satisfied w having become king, bc at the end of the day he only got there bc Falena/Cheka died here. Some people theorize he pulled Scar tactics in the dream, but regardless of that, I don't think the "nature" of the position itself would satisfy his need to be seen, to be genuinely valued. BC WHAT HE CRAVES IS NOT *JUST* TO BE KING, IT'S TO BE RESPECTED FOR THE THINGS HE ACCOMPLISHED... also more proof that if he wants to help out in his country he needs to do it alongside Falena's ideals, bc apparently the only good thing his reign brought in his dream was... no more inflation 😭😭😭 which is good (guy who lives somewhere with too much inflation), but I mean... I think I'd prefer still having nature 😭😭😭

ALSO... and the way he SACRIFICES HIMSELF for Ruggie... AND THROWS HIMSELF TO THE DARKNESS... also his confrontation w his overblot feels much more... depressing? than the others'? ☹️ And and and... The line about him deciding the place he'll live in... ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️ I'm in tears. Pls help.

and at the end he DID know he was dreaming, and he also suspected it before being 100% sure. so I guess our prediction was kind of right 😭

also UHM. THE OUTFIT??? AHHH URNWKDNFKSNSKSKKDKjfjwnnzdn sorry it's. the least important thing of what I wanted to say but he lOOKS SO PERFECT AHHH

[My full thoughts on the book 7 part 11 Leona update here!]

*is grabbed out of nowhere* 🧍‍♂️

NO BECAUSE I WAS THINKING THE EXACT SAME THING... dream!Kifaji is the only NPC/darkness in the dreams that didn't aggro and attack us 😭 In fact, he actively protects us and begs Leona to "wake up", continuously acting as the voice of reason the entire time... AND THEN SMILING AT THE END AND PRAISING "HIS KING" WHEN LEONA FINALLY FULLY WAKES UP... I feel like that definitely is not a happy coincidence. Deep down... some part of Leona's subconscious might have realized something was wrong, and maybe that manifested as Kifaji, the one person in his memories that could stand up to him. Not just because Kifaji is a stubborn old guy (although he is), not because he seems to be a competent mage, but because he must have been Leona's one and only friend and guardian growing up in the palace where the servants always shit talked him and compared him to his older brother. He raised Leona. He played with Leona. He encouraged Leona when his prince didn't believe in himself. He tried so hard to keep Leona from straying. He sees the goodness in Leona. He knows how intelligent Leona can be and how this can save their country. It makes total sense that Kifaji would be the form Leona's conscience assumes.

I feel like dream!Kifaji could also represent... that last shred of hope that Leona has for himself 💀 As late as book 6 of the main story, Leona states that Jamil isn't like him, hinting that while he believes Jamil has the capacity to change and be a better person, he doesn't have that same faith for himself. AND MAN, THAT SHIT WAS HEARTBREAKING OTL Then, entering his dream in book 7, we see just how deep that despair truly runs. Malleus promised everyone happy dreams, didn't he? And Leona has theoretically been given everything he has supposedly ever wanted. The crown, his kingdom, the power to enact all of the policies and laws he believes would benefit his people, wealth for his country, etc. But that has bled the country of its resources, made the people resent him--and he's still left bitter and unfulfilled, alone in the palace. This isn't what happiness truly looks like, but it sadly might be what Leona believes Sunset Savanna is destined for if he's left in charge of it. (Idia likens the dream to a sandbox game, and Leona, being the owner of it, decided to play it "realistically".) He can only become king if the rest of his family dies or goes missing. (This is even more morbid if you believe the headcanon that Leona committed fratricide and murdered/convinced Cheka to run away.) He'll achieve his goals, but at the cost of isolating himself and making himself a pariah. He and his people will starve to death. Everything he touches will crumble into sand. That's all he and his unique magic are good for, anyway. Destroying things, never creating or building them. AND HE STILL CONTINUES TO EXIST IN THIS WASTELAND, ACTING LIKE HE'S IN THE RIGHT AND LIVING IN DENIAL THAT ANY OF THIS IS HIS FAULT... while Kifaji, his conscience, his hope, is right there trying to get him to see reason.

Leona's dream was such a shock to see right after Jack and Ruggie's. The contrast between how he views himself and his rule vs how his dorm members see him and his rule is like NIGHT AND DAY. You got Jack here thinking of Leona as an upstanding and honorable dorm leader and team captain and Ruggie who dreams of a Leona who graduates and betters the lives of the entire country and the less fortunate by building schools and establishing magift/spelldrive clubs (which enhance Sunset Savanna's soft power). Then you have... whatever hellscape Leona has conjured up 😭 It's so sad that Leona pictured RUGGIE as being one of his most devoted haters too. Yeah, Ruggie sometimes complains about Leona running him ragged and how rich people have it easy compared to him, but Ruggie has never expressed this level of vitriol towards Leona before... yet in his own darn dream, Leona believes Ruggie would HATE him and try to overthrow him when that couldn’t be further from the truth. In Ruggie’s dream, he hasn’t even MET Leona before but still looks up to him for what he has accomplished and done to help the poor and the downtrodded 😭

I have mentioned before that I don't believe Leona needs to become an actual king in order to be happy (that post here!), and I think this most recent update proved my point. Jack points it out to us (in case we didn't already put together) that Leona is still miserable in spite of being gifted the crown and kingdom. Leona is still not satisfied. Even if he becomes king, he won't be satisfied. Even if he obtains everything he wants, he won't feel fulfilled. Never, ever, ever. AND THAT MAKES SENSE, because what Leona REALLY wanted all along wasn't the crown but the acknowledgement of his skills and talents... "proof" of his worth as an individual. I feel like the word "king" is thrown around a lot in regards to Leona, both in fandom and within his own dorm (Ruggie, Jack, etc. refer to him as their "king" quite often). However, it's not "king" that holds weight to Leona... it's everything that comes associated with the title. Respect, validation, love. These are all the things Leona got so little of as a child, which is why he fixates on them now. He has even expressed that he doesn't value the title of king if you didn't earn that title to begin with, which just goes to show that he wants to be able to prove himself and be seen for it. AND THE SAVANACLAW STUDENTS DO, AAAAAAAHHHAAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHhHhhhHhhhhh OTL JUST LIKE JACK SAID, HE'S THEIR DORM LEADER...

As dark as Leona's dream was, I appreciate it a lot for its realistic depiction of... Leona's worse tendencies... along with a potential future under his command. I often see people claiming that Leona would be a far better ruler for Sunset Savanna than Falena is. And to that, well... I'd say look at Leona's dream and some of the points brought up in it. I don't think his rule would be as terrible as what we see in the dream, HOWEVER. The dream mentions many shortcomings of Leona as a ruler, such as disregarding traditions and refusing to listen to advisors and input from the people. This would naturally make him unpopular with the country he serves, and it certainly doesn't help that he is not amicable either. These are only a few points I brought up in my extensive post comparing Leona and Falena's ruling styles, which I would highly recommend reading. I want to stress that I am in no way saying Leona would be a bad ruler. I believe that he and Falena compensate for each other's weaknesses. This is why I feel that the best solution isn't a blanket "X brother would be better than Y brother!", but rather that they should work as a team and make the best use of each other's strengths.

adfaiifvifiaef efoubfia LEONA SACRIFICING HIMSELF FOR RUGGIE I PRETTY MUCH SAW COMING 😭 Bro had to do something to make up for almost sanding him in book 2...

I really glossed over Leona's big confrontation with his Phantom in my initial reaction post, so I'd like to take the time to comment more on it here. A lot of what Leona tells his Phantom I felt was also the kind of advice he gave Jamil in book 6 (which only further reinforces the idea that he had hope for Jamil but not for himself). He dislikes people who complain about their situation but do nothing to change the circumstances... ALL TRUE OF BOTH HIM AND JAMIL. I think what makes Leona’s confrontation so different from the others we’ve seen so far is that while the others are more triumphant/telling the Phantoms how they’ve grown… Leona’s is sort of resigned? Like he still sees his negative traits (his pride, his underhandedness, etc.) and talks about how he has changed as a person but he also admits that this is his fault, that this bitterness and desire to be king will always remain will him. That’s fine—because Leona tells that darkness within himself that he’ll accept it too. (Jack does the same; his senpai are pretty awful but he chooses to accept them as they are.) I really loved that Leona swore to himself he’ll find his own throne and country… “Someday, for sure…!” It feels so hopeful after all that depressing stuff 😢 Reclaiming bis autonomy… Weh…………

asdbihabidbasdsa I still wish they had done a little more with Leona “knowing” it was a dream... Maybe making that "Kifaji is that part of Leona" more obvious or clearly stated because I feel like it could sail over people's heads? It might have also been interesting to see the blot try to suppress him like he's a feral beast that has to be kept under control 😔

DB SDABILASFIADFIAF tHAT DFUCKIBG SJHFBLADAD KING!L*ONa OUTFIT OTL TRHIS SI WHAT A MAN IN A SUIT IWiTH A HLAF CAPE THING AND SLICKED BACK HAIR DOES TO MEDFSKNLABIDBFIABIPEAFFQEIPYIBEUOF8TQEVOpfSBPsnjg 26871t9mg9qepgpeqomp9qvda bipivpada iegi THE EyE LOOK TOO ASDBLABSDSFIAFDI IT'S SCO CUn T Y AKJFHLBADGLBIHAGEIHGABIADGILBHWHICH IS REALLY WEIR FOR ME TO SAY ECUASE I USUALYL THINK THESE KINDS O EYE LOOKS ARE WAY TOO MUCH... . . ..... . . ........ . . .. . AnD TGE ExPOSED fOREHEADvv???!?!!!!!? HELLO ???!!!!!’mmcnNCCCVvV,cvvv???!!!!’nxhVahahshjwhzttTyqhwiau iTm anBEHGinG TO BE k!ssrd TOYcHEDF 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢

THIS RICH BITCH IS OVER HERE IN A FANCY SU i TS 4 GOLD NECKLACES AND 3 RINGS WHILE HIS PEOPLE STARVE??????? DAMN NO WONDER WHY THEY WANNA EAT TH E RICH.

Side note: a friend pointed out that Leona's coat is basically a reused Octavinelle dorm uniform asset and, after checking... yeah, it basically is 😭 NOT THAT THERE'S ANYHTING WRONG WIH THAT, I just find it ironic because (in my own pseudo-lore) it reads like him trying so hard to be like J word and get my attention 💀💀💀 I AM AFRAID HE ATE AND LEFT NOC RUBMSN....

[elphabaoftheopera]

HELLO!!!! how are you? it's been a while haha 😅... but, long story short, after watching wicked last night im back in the fandom! and what better way to celebrate than read a fic by my favourite author 🥳 ? so, i read "In Any Universe", and boy do i have a lot of good things to say about it!!!!!

this fic is awesome, im sad that i didn't read it earlier! it had my favourite tropes that were amazingly executed, along with so many wacky and interesting alternate universes 😁😁! some that stood out to me were fake dating, masquerade, family and musical. to say that i really enjoyed these would be an understatement!!!! first of all, fake dating is my absolute favouriteee trope, so i was so so excited to see it applied to fiyeraba so well! the masquerade was honestly a really interesting plotline, and the musical universe was cool to see referenced! and family au was soo adorable, and parents fiyeraba make me feel so happyyyy ❤️❤️! overall, they were all so so romantic and cute and made me realise how much i miss fiyeraba 🥺!! i also really liked the general storyline, and the pipeline of fiyero coming to terms and accepting his situation was so lovely and satisfying to read!

i was wondering if you had any little facts about this fic? it was super creative and i couldn't help but love every separate storyline!!!!!

sorry for gushing, im just super happy to be back and reading your fics again! ill hopefully in the fandom again for a while, so i can find the time to read some other works of yours and maybe reread 😁😁😁

@melop-sia!!!!! It's so wonderful to hear from you!!!! Welcome back to the Wicked fandom! Your message just made my entire day, I actually screamed when I read that I was a favorite author of yours, words like that TRULY go a long way. thank you for your thoughts on In Any Universe. I had so much fun writing that one!

Welllllll since you asked, I'd love to share a little bit about it!

Light spoilers for In Any Universe below the cut!

The idea came to me when I was just thinking a lot about fanfiction tropes in a loving way, inspired by fanfiction writers and our tendency to put the same characters into countless different situations/lives and have them fall in love all the same. I got the idea when I was driving (most of my ideas come when I'm driving) about my otp essentially going on a "tour" through the different tropes. Initially it was supposed to be 100% comedic and self aware.

I didn't have a strong throughline planned out in the beginning that would set them off on their journey. I thought about (and even drafted) Fiyero mentioning how "random" it was that they got together and if any one thing was different they'd probably not be together, then I'd have Elphaba take offense to that. But it just wasn't working, especially because I was clinging to the idea that I wanted Fiyero to be human in the present timeline. Once I finally released my hold on that idea and let him be a Scarecrow, the story throughline became much clearer to me! It was easier to write when Fiyero had a "lesson" to learn (sort of "It's a Wonderful Life" style, though I've never seen that movie). That of course made the throughline a bit more serious, as well as some of the timelines getting increasingly darker.

I just can't resist angst and hurt/comfort no matter how hard I try!

I just really love the quote I put at the beginning of the story about finding the same person over and over.

As for the stories within the story, I just started by making a list of as many tropes I could think of. Fake dating, fix-it fic, crossover, etc. and eventually trimmed it down to the stories that made the cut. I wrote them all out of order and then stitched them together later with the throughline story. I think I did the coffee one first, then the masquerade, and then I put it down for several months (as is my style) and picked it back up with the Wicked actor one.

I really considered breaking the story up into chapters and sometimes I regret the fact that I didn't, I still consider breaking it up because I know it's very long. Still I think it flows better as a singular piece but at least can be easily read in multiple sittings if you're like me and need mind breaks.

When I decided to make it one single piece I made a real effort to keep the sections snappy and not longer than they needed to be. I was pretty obsessed over word count and keeping it below a certain amount (I think 1000 words). I think the Fake Dating one ended up being the longest and the hardest to keep trimmed. Still, I wanted each story to have a satisfying arc in its own way.

One challenge I gave myself (which was VERY difficult) is that I didn't use the word "love" until the very end when Fiyero told Elphaba he loved her after getting shot. I came to that idea later on and had to edit a lot of the earlier stories. Then he says he loves her many times in the finale scene.

I thought it strengthened his lesson about being grateful for what they did have. I found it really important to mirror the "can't imagine thinking about how things might be different" (paraphrasing) in the worst timeline with her dying in the cornfield with what he'd said in the beginning.

As for the ending I did leave it slightly ambiguous, but I believe as the writer that the journey he went on was real and not a dream (kind of like I believe that in Wizard of Oz Dorothy's experience really happened, even though it seemed like Dorothy was waking up from a dream). However, I wanted to the reader to decide for themself!

I think my favorite ones to write were the Fiyeraba family (I love them as parents!), Coffee shop AU, and the Masquerade. I also found it clever and trippy to do the Wicked actors, but that one was by far the hardest challenge!

I so appreciate your readership and engagement with my work!!!! Please reach out in the future if you ever have thoughts or questions.

I don't want to jinx it because it's still early days but I'm excited to say I've been writing again (Fiyeraba, obviously) now that my life has more time. We'll see where it takes me, so be on the lookout!

[skeleton-squid-b0y]

thanks for the tag @majorbaby :))

tagging by ignore if u want ofc.... @hotchley @dwintu @zanderbobs @localorangecat

Were you named after anyone?

my old middle name used to be partially after my gran but she's dead and I'm a dude now so no 🤙

When was the last time you cried?

uhhhh I sobbed like a child a few weeks ago after a horrible hour with my mum so that was fun. I don't cry much tho

Do you have kids?

nope. I like the idea of having kids but I don't trust myself to not turn into my mum and that would kill me

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

yeah 90% of what i say is sarcasm and i have a very dry sense of humour

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

idk I normally spend the first few interactions just deciding which version of me they should know

What’s your eye color?

green but I kinda have central heterochromia so like the middle bit is brown

Scary movies or happy endings?

I'm not into scary movies and I like some happy endings but i much prefer satisfying or like real and meaningful endings and those aren't always totally happy

Any special talents?

for some reason the only thing that comes to mind is I can keep a straight face while doing pretty much anything

Where were you born?

local hospital, I feel like Yorkshire is specific enough lol

What are your hobbies?

comics, reading, music... not much else

Have any pets?

dog called Friday, she's so full of love and absolutely nothing else. not a single thought behind those eyes. im 100% sure she is autistic. also 4 garden snails (i love them so much). also beardie called valkyrie.

What sports do you play/have you played?

I used to play football (im not calling it soccer.) but my knees are fucked an I had to stop but I miss it so so so fucking much hopefully my knees won't always be this bad and I'll be able to play again

How tall are you?

5'2

Favorite subject in school?

at high school it was biology or English, at A-level it was sociology

Dream job?

activism journalism.... like eddie brock

[hickeysgodcomplex]

that’s such a good way of putting it! i like a few bmth songs but i don’t know that many. i’ve dabbled into emo music and i think fob and bmth fit under emo??? but i’m not sure 100%. definitely get the interest in them, i should listen to more honestly but it’s Not The Right Time yet haha. it will happen sooner or later! just not now :’]

REAL!!!! i fucking have to have lyrics the first time i listen to a song or else i may as well not listen to it. i need to know the very essence of the song in every form or i’m not satisfied. lyricism is one of my favorite things, probably because i love words in general, but GOD. i love songs and concepts and fitting that into groovy lil tunes. it’s the best. AND YES, oh my god. you get it. i fucking love chateau (feel alright) because at a certain point in the song, you can hear joe’s mouth sounds and i’m so fucking obsessed with it. it’s also just one of my favorite djo songs in general. it’s ethereal to me. it’s a favorite song of all time of mine, as well as end of beginning. i did the math of playing a certain part of that song as the new year rolled in, if that explains any at all how much i adore end of beginning. music and me are one, as are you and music. i’m so happy you understand. it’s made me overjoyed and no less of it

:( that’s so kind. i hope you’re proud of yourself, because i am <3 i am so glad that you’re here, thank you for being here. i’m sure little you is so so so proud of you and happy to be where you are now 🫶

WOAH. that food looks so delicious, holy shit. looks like food from an actual recipe website or something. broccoli is so good by the way. i had this broccoli bake recently that was like mac and cheese but was broccoli instead of macaroni and it was incredible! i hope you can have more nice food soon, to treat yourself and such <3333

-🦇 (MWAH, you’re so nice to talk to. i felt like this was worth adding. talking to you makes stuff feel less lonely, if that’s not too parasocial to say. you’re such a cozy person and you have incredible vibes. thank you for existing in this space. you make it a lot brighter just by being you)

I think technically bmth is like screamcore stuff but they aren't as screamy now thankfully cuz i cant do the constant screams. Im like baby you're hurting both us with all this yelling. 🤣🤣🤣 but yeah i would think like emo punky and fob is like poppunk i think. I just ADORE their lead singer and his voice and ugh i can try and rec you a few songs if you ever want! Whenever the time hits!!!

(Gonna pop this under a readmore cuz they keep getting long!!! 🤣🤣🤣)

Ooohh yessssss Chateau is SUCH a dreamy song!!!! Its not my fave fave one but it does get stuck in my head A LOT. and yesss end of beginning is amazing too!!! I think Mutual Future (repeat) is one of my very faves. I just love how slow it is and then the like, way he almost chants the bit later on. Like he's full of so much need. Like... gosh. There's also a line in Personal Lies that literally makes my head go all fuzzy every time i hear it. Cuz, and hopefully not too tmi here, but I'm a little subby gremlin and he uses his condescending voice when he says "you need attention. Well baby there's the line" and i just.... go a little feral. Every time. Getting shivers now just thinkin about it. But like... that happens with me and music alllll the time!!!! And i LOVE that you timed it!!! Thats amazing!!! Sometimes you just need to hear the right thing to start the year right!!!!

And i am! Very proud of myself. I still have bad days here and there. But they never feel like i can't get past it anymore. So thats really nice. I just sort of embraced the small joys and it really just makes things brighter!

And awwww thank youuuuuu!!!! I love cooking so much!!!! I would share my food if i could!!!

YOU ARE SO SWEET OH MY GOSH! not parasocial too much i don't think. Most of my friends are online people who live in my phone ans i have so much love for them!!! BUT IM GENUINELY SO GLAD MY VIBES ARE GOOD AND COZY YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME CRYYYYY!!!!

[littlelambdrgnfly]

Ok since you reblogged that one post I hope you know I reread The Sum of Them for the 3rd time, maybe like a month ago, up until the last chapter and i never finished it cause i didnt want to experience it ending again (if that makes sense), i wish it never ended. I wish they could play baby games forever but its so important it does end because the ending is soo beautiful but so devastating, and it's beautiful because its so devastating, and my heart cant take experiencing that again :'-(

i already sent a message on here saying that your fic was the first fic to make me cry, possibly the first piece of LITERATURE in general to make me cry (i could be wrong but i cant remember any piece before that), and it made me cry 2 times when reading it for the first time. It is truly my favorite piece of McLennon fanfiction, but the only reason i dont fully consider it mine is that if someone were to ask me, it'd be too taboo/freaky to say but its truly one of the most heartfelt and complex ways ive ever seen anyone portray John and Paul while also feeling completely accurate and realistic. My god. And i love so many of your other fics too but The Sum of Them really means so much to me and I cant even say that enough. i wish you could just live as me and be inside my mind to fully grasp how much of an affect it had on me, I dont think i will ever be able to explain it sadly </3. But just know out of every McLennon fic ive ever read (and ive read many), THAT one is my very favorite out of like 100+. The way you characterize them is just so completely different from any other fic ive read and its so intimate and raw and holy shit i dont even have the words. Sorry i know im rambling at this point but I just think about it a lot! Also your fics are the only fics i enjoy anymore, (recent) beatles fics have gone down the drain in my opinion and yours are the only ones i can be satisfied with because, as far as im concerned, anything you write is automatically in-character for them after reading The Sum of Them lol x) thank you so SO much for writing cause it's truly exposed so many of my own desires and hidden , sensitive parts of myself that couldn't be excavated any other way without your work 💖

Dude... this is legitimately one of the best comments I've ever gotten. I wish I could memorize all of this and replay it for myself whenever I'm feeling blue. Thank you so so much, it means the world to me! I think all writers insert their own thoughts and emotions into their work, and I definitely do that in all of mine, but especially The Sum of Them. This fic is basically my wishlist of things I would do with a partner, as well as coming to better terms with my own kinks, so I'm glad it's been able to resonate with people. I'm also glad that I managed to keep John and Paul in character, even if John is crying every other paragraph lmao! I totally get what you're saying about wishing I could experience what you did, I wish I could too. Sometimes I reread my fics with the mindset of someone reading it for the first time, but it's just not the same. I'd give my left tit for more writers on my level or higher who wrote bottom!John or even ABDL fics, I swear. I don't read a lot of fics these days, but I'm usually disappointed whenever I check the Beatles tab. I'm also really really bad at remembering titles and author names, so I never remember what fics that I like! Thank God for bookmarks. I definitely understand not wanting to tell people that this is your favorite fic though, lol! I've been writing Beatles fics for a long time, but I created a new account on AO3 when I started writing these fics. I'm comfortable talking about this stuff, but only with the help of an alternate profile. I'm really really happy to help people explore this side of themselves though-- too often fics like mine are just really gross over-the-top and completely unrealistic portrayals in my opinion, and I guess I wanted to bring something sweeter and more realistic to the table. <3

[zak-shit]

sweet life

today is still messy. but better than the last few....? i haven't truly been great with eating again. kinda not having regular meals unless I'm with lo.. even then i kind of have to force myself. which isn't good i know.

last night she came up with a new rule to only have hook ups if she's able to make content out of it, and also be into it. doesn't want to just get people off. which makes me feel much better. I'm glad she doesn't just want to get other off. and i defiantly want her to be into it. it being done for content as a priority, makes me feel much less disregarded, and comfortable with the situation.

she did kind of ask if she could top if it was for content, to which i most defiantly did not like and shut down. 100% not ready for that. and the fact that it was asked/ wanted from her kind of hurt. and overshadowed the development above. she did say she hasn't came across anyone else she wants to top. very glad to hear that, and i would hope not. i guess it just also threw me off, because I was having this feeling apart of her no longer wanted to be a top. which could still have truth in there in some ways. I feel like im being generous allowing her to get head from others if she wanted. bc of course I want to be the only one, but i still want her to defiantly get pleasure as well.

all this waiting for more just gets me sometimes, sometimes im great and am able to accept, be satisfied with what we have. she's just not super affectionate, still loves me very much. i just get in my head, and wonder if i was someone else, if they would get more affection... sometimes I think its really just me. i can also admit, that I too am awkward and could probably make some more moves, i just don't get a read that she wants it.. and i feel like trash if i do something and then i'm shut down... but I cant wait for something that i'm not sure will happen, and i also need to live more in the moment.

i know theres a-lot of ranting and layers there, but id like to what im grateful for as well. I thought I would never have someone love me as a partner, I know I'm good enough, but I didnt think I could meet someone I wanted to be with in that way either. And I want to be with Lo with my whole heart. She has the best music taste. A dark humor I need someone to have. A sweetheart really. ( mixed with a bit brattiness, shhh she knows that too) but also that can be in a good way too, she knows what she wants, and will make sure she gets that. she knows the importance of prioritizing oneself, and also loves to make others happy. she can be outspoken in a great way too, she doesnt really sugar coat things. god i am absolutely smitten for her. I want with my everything to blossom through life together, be beside her to transition and always feel beautiful. I love our life with the kittys, and out kitty family to grow one day. I cant wait to live in our own place together and wake up and go to sleep together every night and every day. We'll have the cutest maximalist place, with lots of plants and the best lighting. Always smelling good, from our candles and clean linen, to the delicious meals cooked with love.

work is going okay, after 5 full years, and a battle with myself. i'm finally going to go into management. just finished my back of house modules, have a few more areas to train on back there. then i'll get into being able to open the store by myself, and have some key shifts. i need to find out when I'll actually be able to have key shifts, bc i do feel ready for them. plus months of those are required to go into the interview process of management.

I'm also on day 3 without any social media on my phone, which hasn't been as hard tbh. I've also been occupied. There were a few times when sitting around watching drag race last night, that I wanted to scroll a little bit. but that has passed quickly, and i've been glad/ proud to not have the useless info entering my brain. I defiantly will be keeping it up for a long time, if not forever.

[ventofu]

# part one: shopping with genshin men ☆

WELCOME TO THE SHOPPING CENTER !

[ ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡ what is it you desire today? ]

☆૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ╮☆ currently playing .. ♡ !

pretty boy by the neighbourhood ! ♫ 🍨🍡

[ ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡ a bottle of love, comin' up! ]

# (🍓) AVAILABLE CHARACTERS:

CHILDE, THOMA AND ZHONGLI ! 💗

special notes: GN!READER ♡ headcanons about how shopping w/ the genshin men would be like <3, modern setting, cute n' sappy <3

# (🌊) CHILDE !

♡ would definitely go all out - his chest just puffs out in pride whenever he sees the sparkles in your eyes when another glittery package wrapped up in a neat bow arrives at your front door .. again ^^; ..

♡ definitely spoils you! basks in seeing you happy, especially because im also sure that he spoils teucer and buys him all the toys he wants

♡ childe is definitely your #1 supporter when it comes to trying on clothes. he loves boosting your confidence and is always praising how beautiful you look wearing something you picked out ! (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

♡ he also likes subtly showing off his strength, so during your shopping trips, your hands are empty. he's the one walking around with the piles of various clothes around, kinda like a celebrity's little assistant ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ

♡ on a similar note, drags you to perfume stores and is on his knees begging you to buy the same kind you've always been using, according to him, it's just so you. it reminds him of you, when its fragrance swathes your clothes or whenever you both are sappy n' cuddling during the wee hours of the morning (୨୧ ❛ᴗ❛)✧ !

♡ the most loving boyfriend ever i swear ! even though he sometimes "complains" about how heavy the shopping bags he has in his hands, you just know he's looking for an excuse to kiss you (≧◡≦) !

" no! i'm being serious! these shopping bags are so heavy .. look at your poor boyfriend.. the least you could do is offer him a warm, comforting kiss for his efforts... >:(( hey! are you seriously ignoring me? i said i was being serious! "

♡ now, we all know this man's wallet is FULL. and we also know that he has the capability to get anything he wants in just a snap - so obviously he uses that ability to please you

♡ after all, you're his pretty baby, and his pretty baby gets treated like royalty. no questions asked (๑•̀ᗝ•́)૭ <3

♡ im 100% sure instead of buying you one bouquet of flowers you can keep conveniently in a vase, he orders his fatui subjects to buy out all the flower shops in liyue ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ !

♡ whenever you two are out shopping, you have to be wary with your words - because if you even show the slightest interest in something.. let's say, a pretty top hanging on a mannequin at the window of a clothing shop - he's pulling out his wallet and urging you to try it on for him (〃´𓎟`〃) !

♡ of course, he never asks you to pay him back, but if he gets to see you in a cozy sweater or the most gorgeous outfits he's ever seen, that's enough to satisfy him ;> ♡

# (🐶) THOMA !

♡ now, this pretty boy, definitely looks forward to bringing you out bc he just basks in your presence >< !!

♡ he just loves being around you - so it doesn't matter if you have a shopping list or not, one of his favorite things to do with you is window shopping !

♡ thoma would definitely be hanging around the pet shop - he enjoys browsing through the section of outfits for dogs, both of you giggling as you hold up a goofy superhero costume (´･ω･`) taroumaru is your lovechild n' is always a victim to your shenanigans (- ‸ - )

♡ thoma is one of the most romantic and sappy boyfriends ever ^^! he buys you trinkets that remind him of you, whether that be a pair or earrings or a cozy scarf. (psst, he's a blushing mess when you peck him on the cheek as thanks ! ) ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡

♡ an amazing shopping buddy! a dream boy basically ! he's always honest whenever you try something on - lowkey an expert at fashion, especially at the way he criticizes you (but with good intentions ofc !! he just wants you to look good <3) (ᵕᴗ ᵕ⁎)

♡ would let you put clips in his hair. or absolutely any kind of accessory - as long as he sees that you're enjoying yourself on your date together, he'd consent to anything ( •ω•ฅ) ♡

♡ listen. a sucker for matching couple things !! it may look cringey and too lovey-dovey to others, but thoma does not care about their opinions >< ♡ once you suggest you both wear matching ugly sweaters or phone cases - he is already asking the cashier for available sizes（／﹏＼）

" agh love, i told you, the orange one matches you much better.. just choose one. aw c'mon, don't pout at me like that! h-hey, i know you aren't using puppy eyes on me right now - taroumaru would not approve, you menace ! "

# (🧸) ZHONGLI !

♡ now, this sweetheart, is definitely an angel when it comes to shopping with you !! you know why? lots and lots of compliments, basically showering you with praise all the time !

♡ he's either confused at the small trinkets he finds at corner stores, or very knowledgeable about them, there's no in between. a pushpop? a confused deer in headlights. a ring with a specific type of crystal? lots and LOTS of rambling. (-人-)

♡ the moment he enters the store, the salesladies are scrambling and grabbing baskets from the counter, because duh, this man is just dripping in luxury and they know that whenever you two are around, you're his spoiled pretty prince/princess ･ﾟ･(｡>ω<｡)･ﾟ･ !

♡ definitely brings you to those small art displays and starts monologuing for hours on end (⋟﹏⋞) but im sure he surprises you with a bouquet of glaze lillies he bought at a nearby flower shop when you weren't looking ! ( ; ω ; )

♡ expect lots of surprise presents like those ! while you're browsing through those cute stalls by the street market, you'll randomly feel a familiar grip on your waist, until those same hands are clasping a heart locket around your neck, marigold eyes that match staring back at you .. (╥﹏╥)

♡ if you're into makeup, i just know he would no doubt be your little test dolly（＾∀＾）he's very compliant and allows you to test the new blush on his cheeks or the eyeshadow you purchased ! on a similar note, we all know how zhongli wears red eyeliner right? exactly. he would love and enjoy it if you applied it on him in the store ! ♡(ŐωŐ人)

♡ i feel like zhongli is the winter clothes leaning kind of guy, so going to a clothing store that sells exactly that is a must !! he just loves seeing you drowning in those beige trench coats, looking all warm and cuddly. he just wants to pick you up ! (＃￣ω￣)

♡ his gifts always have meaning, no doubt about that ! he always makes sure to tell you the meaning behind the little knicknacks for you, what a charmer !! (//▽//)

♡ is the type to take photos of you doing the silliest things, wearing goofy hats at the photo booth, or hugging a stuffed chicken at the toy store bc he finds you amusing (つω`｡)

♡ * will also accidentally misunderstand you when you say you want something - that stuffed chicken for example, you were whining about how cute it was (despite its astounding price, geez!) and so you were surprised to find it sitting on your shared bed that same night (T⌓T) (but he's so cute and thoughtful that you just can't stay mad at him ^^;)

" forgive me beloved, perhaps i misunderstood you .. i did find you adorable bringing it everywhere earlier, so i must say it was a valuable purchase.. "

[hellsfirekeepsyouwarm]

Hey! I was wondering if I could request a fic with frank castle.

One where he is a brute (as usual) and friendish enemies to lovers.

Until the reader gets hurt and he has to take care of her. He’s a real softie.

And if it’s not to much. He doesn’t confess love. They stare at wachtgeld and just kiss?

I know it’s a lot but it would make me SO incredibly happy.

XX

Happy new year and hope you’re in good health

Punching The Bag

Hi love, happy new year to you too, and so freaking thanks for requesting, i really hope you gonna like this, i worked a lot on it. Im not 100 percent satisfied with it, but it turned out okay. Warning it's long. Really long. Tell me if you want me rewrite it, with a different scenario, i will make that happen. And feel free to request anytime you have an idea, right now im taking Frank Castle and Matthew Murdock reqs.

Just a heads up, i'm not a native English speaker, so you might find incorrect grammar or something.

Frank Castle x reader

Warnings: blood, injuries, guns, fighting

The rhythmical sound of your knuckles hitting the bag is music to your ears. The gym is empty, just the way you like it. No curious stares, hushed whispers behind your back, gosh you hate them so fucking much. Yeah, you are not a natural fighter. A gun in your hand feels way more familiar, but you need to make something out of your fist too. You have to admit, that jealousy is the part of the reasons you are here, so freaking late, beating the shit out of a lifeless thing.

You watched Frank take down men with his bare hands like it's nothing. Just the thought of such a strength made you hate and admire him at the same time. A lot of man is capable of such thing, but damn he was so good at it. He beats you at the fight scene, and surely beats you at the shooting range.

Both of you have reasons to do what you do. His might be more grievous than yours, but still, you have every right to be where you are. Sometimes he forgets that, thinking your presence on the battlefield is just a distraction. On those days, you fight like an old married couple, not even hearing what the other one is saying, screaming so loud not caring who's witnessing the scene. And somehow you still manage to work together, there are no really another choice. You provide information, he provides muscle. At the end of the day, both of you get what you want. Names, places, dates, answers.

Today, is a bad day. He didn't pissed you off, didn't made your life a little bit more miserable, no. He was nowhere to be found. Nothing. He started the day with the gym, was there after lunch, matter of fact, he would so annoyed right now, that you are punching the exact bag he usually likes to assault, just in the time he likes to be there. His absence is more than alarming to you, so you went to the gym, thinking he has to be there. But no.

You thought he would show up, be mean, tell you to fuck off, go home, and let him take out his anger alone. It's been hours. At least two, and you are sure you missed him, he must have decided to stay home. Or he's dead.

Just as you swing the last hit, you hear the door open. A smile creeps up to your face. Finally, it was about time you asshole.

You turn around, more than ready to face him, because ohh he's gonna be pissed. The smile quickly dies off of your cheeks. It's not him. The man stares blankly at you, a calculated smile appearing, showing teeth like an animal.

"We are closed for the night, come back in the morning!" You say simply, trying not to show any type of emotion besides boredom. The act of i don't give a shit. But you give a shit about the man in front of you, whom you never met, never saw here before, and somehow got in, and you clearly remember locking the back door after you let yourself in. This is bad. Shit.

You casually lean to the side, grabbing the water bottle near on the ground, watching the dude in the corner of your eye.

"I'm sorry, i just saw the lights are on, thought i can relieve some stress."

His voice drips with honey, sounds sincere, but his face, gosh his face tells another story. His eyes roam up and down you body, checking your surroundings. He's looking for something. Or someone.

"You alone?"

"No, i'm not alone, my friend here, he has stomach problems, he's pro..."

Your sentence caught in your throat, as another man appears behind him. His gaze locking at you immediately, not caring for the other one at all. You grip your bottle in your hand, trying so hard to think this over. Anything you do or say after this, they will know you know. Hell, they already know you are not dumb enough to believe they just stumbled upon this gym.

"I saw you before here, i remember you talking to that ex marine. What's his name?" The new guy says, circling on your right side, the other one moving the left side, his hand disappearing behind his back. No fucking way this happening.

"I don't know any military douchebag, so why don't you get lost? As i said, this gym is closed." Your words has an edge, warning them the last time to drop this. Whatever their play is.

"You know very well we won't leave this place. Unless you know where he is." The one on your left side speaks up, having enough of the acting.

"I'm sure i saw you with him the other day. Looked like you are pretty close to him, don't you?"

You lips pressed together, legs rooted in the same spot. Both of them on your sides, one hand visible only, the other one probably on the cool metal of a handgun. You have no weapon on you. Nothing. Just your bare hands.

They knew Frank would be here. At least they thought, because he's here all the time. They probably watched him for a while, and for sure they saw you with him. They came here, expecting to be Frank to punching his anger and frustration away. But here you are, the only time you decided to come here in the middle of the night.

On your left, you see a slight but quick movement, and you sprung into action. The bottle in your hand flies to the man, distracting him for just a little bit, his gun aiming next to you. Shots are fired, behind you, and in front of you. You cant even comprehend your thought process, you go with you instinct, using everything you ever learned about self defense.

A bullet flies next to you, but you only can focus on the threat that lies beyond. Gun pointing at your head, finger seconds away from pulling the trigger. But you are close enough, close enough for that trick. Your left palm grabbing the barrel, pushing it upwards as it goes off, feeling it's breeze on the top of your head. Your right hand hitting the dude's wrist, the push causing him to let go of the gun just for a little bit. That's all you need, before you connect you knee with his crotch. He screams out loud, a small victory of adrenaline rushing through you like a drug.

But that wildfire of adrenaline couldn't drown out completely the pain that hits your side, sharp pain, soothed with warmness. Your minds blocked off the shots that are being fired at you, and now it's louder than anything you ever heard. Your fist flies to the guy's jaw, knocking him over just enough to move away, before he regains his composure. Your attention turns to the other one, but it's cut short, a hand grabs you by the neck, knocking you down to the cold ground.

A sharp intake of breath isn't enough to your lungs, and the second you try to move, fingers dug deep into the gash on you side. An inhuman groan escapes you, feeling the warm blood pressing out of the wound, flesh twisting and turning to the assault of the hand.

"Now tell me darling, where is Frank Castle, and i promise i can make this quick for you. You decide." His face is in yours, the other man standing over you, weapon pointing at your head.

Fingers digging into your injury, the other pressing you throat closer to the floor. You can't manage words, just a pathetic wheeze, gasping for air.

You smile a little, accepting the faith life handed to you. There are no chance you giving up anything on Frank. You'll die happy, knowing you did your part, and he would do his, fulfilling not only his revenge, but yours too. Even if your part of this is only buying him some time.

A fist collides with your nose, a cracking noise ringing in your ears, feeling the blood trickling down on your cheeks. Fucking hell that hurt. Your sense of surroundings fades as the pain works in your whole skull, and you almost think the gunshot you hear is just your mind tricking you. But the hand replaced with a boot on your neck, pressure increasing with every millisecond. You feel the ground slightly shaking at your feet, voices barley reaching you as the haze of the pain numbs you momentary.

"You take another step, and i swear i break her neck in half."

You open your eyes, seeing the man above you, gun in his hand, but not looking at you. His attention is somewhere else in the room, but you can't look, his leg blocking the view.

As reality comes back slowly to you, you feel the air thicken by the second, as the man stares, you can see his hands trembling on the cold steel, his finger on the trigger twitching. He's scared, his chest raising and falling heavy.

Your hear steps, echoing back from the gym walls, just as your punches did ten minutes ago. Confident and determined steps, and you know it's him. Has to be him. However you try, you can't move your head, the foot on you won't bulge, keeping you in a choke hold.

"Have it your way Castle" is all you hear, before the boot lifts up, you track the underfoot's pattern, distancing from your body. Air fills you lungs, your neck hurts more without the pressure, breathing burns your insides. The relief comes quick, and terror quicker, seeing the foot speed towards you again, the man shooting his gun, and so does Frank. You flinch as the man's head drops back, bullet hitting his forehead. He collapses next to you, not touching you again.

You finally move your head, every muscle screaming, but it's all more tolerable as you see him. In his regular gym clothes, a dark hoodie on him, sweatpants and a sneaker. All in his glory.

You sigh. "I want to punch you in the face so bad"

Your voice hoarse, barley working.

He scoffs, he can't believe you have energy to be sassy. He's by your side before you know it, eyes searching for injuries he might have missed, god knows how long those guys cornered you before he got here.

Face laced with concern and anger. The two emotion is battling on his features, and you drowning in it, you could die in it, but his gaze falls on the dead body next you, and other at your foot, which you just realize is there.

The world starts to spin as you lift you head up, a groan escapes you, oh you are gonna have a hell of a week after this.

His palm catches the back of your head, his touch careful but firm.

'C'mon sweetheart." The tone is so low, giving you the goosebumps. Whenever he calls you sweetheart, he tries to get under your skin, getting on your nerves. But now, it's just sounds comforting, the familiarity to it makes you ease up to him.

He helps you up, you can't hold back the cry as pain sweep through you, Frank freezes in his tracks.

"Is it your side? Did they hit you anywhere else?" He asks, holding you up while trying not to hurt you more.

"I don't think so." You say, barely above a whisper.

Your whole body weight is on him, but he doesn't make a sounds. You hear his irregular breath, the blood rushing in your ears, and the quietness spreading over the whole gym space. He doesn't say a word, and neither are you.

As you reach the office, he puts you down on the chair behind the desk, your head falls back on the comfortable headrest as soon as his palm leaves you skin. You feel him moving around in the small space, rattling with boxes and objects you can't recognize by the sound. You head snaps back when you feel his close proximity, he's sitting on another chair, dragged close to yours. The little lamp on the desk is on, giving you the spotlight. He reaches for your t-shirt that sticks to your skin like it's glued down. He slowly lifts it up, revealing the nasty gash just above your right hip. You look down at it, but all you can see is red flesh, coated with thick blood.

"Don't look at it." He commands, and your eyes flicker up at his posture. A med kit is spread open on the desk next to him, tools already in his hands.

"What are you doing?" You ask, like it's not obvious.

"You need stitches." A couple of minutes ago you saw so much emotion on him, now it's just void. You stare at him, trying not to focus on the pain in your side, and then in your nose when you scrunch it up in discomfort. You hold onto the desk so tightly you break all your nails into it, the other one in a fist just hanging at your side.

Frank works soundless and fast, but when the needle hits your skin, you grab onto his shoulder, steadying yourself with the contact.

"I fucking hate needles."

"I know." he whispers, not glancing away from your skin.

You never seen him like this. You never saw him touching someone else, besides the occasional pat on the back. You saw him punch a bag, break an arm, treating his own injuries like an itchy spot, but this is new. His fingers work delicately, paying attention to any reaction you give, giving you space and time, when he feels you can't take it. It's just a couple of stitches, it's not a big deal, you thought. But the needle in your flesh made you dizzy and nauseous.

"You know you could have called." He finally lift his eyes, meeting yours, searching for what do you mean by that exactly. "Just to know you are alive or something."

You hate yourself to admit, but you were on edge all day, and you were frustrated with him too much to keep your mouth shut. He gives you a half smile, then he returns to the task on your side.

"But i can see you were busy." You lift your fingers to his face, tracking the new cut on his eyebrow he probably collected during the day. He's not fazed from your touch, but it's the most you have ever got. You thought he would scold you, flinch away, brush your fingers off, but nothing. His focus continues to be on your injury.

"What were you doing here Y/N?" He asks, his voice not fitting the big bad Punisher you know very well. Soft and curious, tired.

"I was thinking you might be here. I wanted to give you a hard time for not giving life signals." You sound defeated, and to be honest, you are. Physically and emotionally. You just want to get over with this nurse play he's doing, and go home, have a drink or two, and pass out. He's quiet again, and damn it's making you go feral.

"Damnit Frank! Fucking say something." As you let the rage out, your fist collide with the desk, tears pricking your eyes as fury washes over you accompanied with pain. "Damnit Frank..." Soft sobs erupts from you, the hand that hit the desk with so much power, now hides your eyes in shame and tiredness from Frank. You feel weak and ashamed for letting your guard down, in front of him at the top of that.

Frank's fingers pulls your hand from your face, reveling a very broken looking you. You try to look away, staring at the door he dragged you in, tears clouding your vision, they drop down on your face as rain.

"Look at me sweetheart." You give in, his face is beat up, purple and red spots all over his perfect features you hate and love so much at the same time. He smiles a little bit, an encouraging smile, his hand nears you again, touching your face smudging the blood on your lips. His eyes scanning your features, not missing any spot, and you feel the heat rushing to your cheeks, and you fear he can feel it on his fingertips.

"Your nose is broken" He states, as his pointing finger and thumb slides up and down on either side of your nose. You sigh, closing your eyes, thinking about all the way you can kill him right now, this moment. And with that in your head, he cracks your nose in place, making you almost scream out from the sudden pain shooting up to your brain. Now you are really going to kill him.

"Fucking hell Frank, a warning would have been nice. Jesus." You groan, clutching the center of your face.

He actually laughs, and you can't help the death stare you give him. The laugh isn't reaching his eyes tho, still laced with concern and fear. If he has any. So you just look at the beautiful brown eyes, the eyes you would die and live for. And you almost died today.

You just stare at each other, faces not showing too much, words dead in your throats, bodies still as rock. Minutes pass like this. Your body feels the pull towards him, and he's freaking aware of it, cause out of the blue, his body lunges towards you, hands cupping your face. You feel his heat, breath on your face as your eyelids close automatically, before his lips catches yours.

He tastes like blood mixed with mint, hunger and satisfaction, life and death. The kiss is soft and slow, neither of you hurry to end it, just enjoying the sensations that the other can offer.

Your hand grabs into his shoulder, keeping him close, you fear he's going to disappear after this, nursing you back to a somewhat health, and leaving you hanging here. You are a burden to him, and he is a burden to you.

He's the first to pull back, a sharp intake signals he needed to breath, and you practically gasp for air when the warmness of his lips leaves. Your eyes are closed, basking in the feeling of him on you, just a little bit, before the moment is ruined. And Frank is right on cue with that, the needle is back again under your skin, you hiss at the sudden sting.

"Shhhhhit."

"I'm sorry." He mumbles, finishing off the stitches, the gash is now a tightly shut wound, you look like you stepped out of a low budget horror movie. There is a hint of smile on his face, eyes focusing on the last touches, covering the injury with gauze.

"No you aren't." One of his eyebrows lift up, as he looks at you, straight in the eye, challenging you in some way. "Way to ruin the moment" You admit, you can't just pretend that his lips crushing into yours didn't affected you.

"You know i'm all about the romance, darling" A cocky smirk plastered on on his lips, and you surrender as you mirror him, trying to collect yourself from this hellish of a night.

"You okay?" He suddenly switches into a serious tone, not the teasing one you used to.

"What is a broken nose and a little scratch to me?" You laugh, if you are lucky, he believes it for tonight. You don't even believe yourself at the moment. His eyes travel down to your neck, a nasty bruise is probably already showing around the delicate skin, and you you he's gonna store this picture in his head for a long time, before he can forgive himself. "It's not your fault Frank"

"You were seconds away from death, Y/N. Or something worse." Your head burns and aches from all the emotions he displayed in the last couple of minutes, while you can't even track yours properly.

"Stop it Frank. Just..." You press your palm to your forehead, yearning for a relief from the pressure in your brain. "I knew what i'm signing up for, when i met you. I'm not delusional, i'm not stupid. So can we skip this part, please?"

He lets his head hung low, elbows resting on his knees, the needle he used on you still in his hands, playing with the tiny metal in between his fingers. You lift his chin up, caressing the unshaven skin with your thumb, slightly touching his lower lip. He lets you, he's not protesting. As the perfect angle comes, you crush your lips with his. The power of hitting your nose to his face making you groan into his mouth,his tongue slipping right next to yours in the process. His taste filling you again, savoring it for later. You share a heated kiss, way more shorter than before. He breaks it again, and you pout, not caring if he sees it. He lick his lips, collecting himself for a second, before standing up, and slipping his arm behind your back.

"Let's get you home, sweetheart." Yes, that's a fucking good idea.

[diavolosthots]

Hey, I'm here again requesting the continuation for yandere!Belphegor, in which the reader almost scapes from him, but is caught by him in the very last second, like in those very dramatic movies?

Im so sorry it took literally forever for this. I aint gonna lie when you requested that second part and even messaged me about it before, I STILL forgot and now this has been in my ask box for ages, too.

Anyway this is a DIRECT continuation of "Can't You See" so i suggest you read that first.

Warning: mentions of non-con/r*pe, kidnapping, manipulation, yandere

You'll See (YANDERE!BELPHEGOR X GN!READER)

He kept you there for what felt like forever. The dark, cold look of the shed brought you little to no comfort. Where even were you? You vaguely remembered being dragged down the Devildom streets into this… abandoned structure. Had he planned this out? You used to ask him these questions, and he would always laugh at you. “I’ve had you for a lot longer than you realize, (Y/N).” Is what he would always say. The way he said it would keep you up at night, unable to sleep, not that you could even if you wanted to. He’d whisper constant reminders in your ear about how he is the one keeping you alive and around, he is the one caring for you, and he is the only one you could rely on. Belphegor tried, as much as he could, to be with you, but he can’t be too suspicious. Yet, when he did leave, you still couldn’t let out a sigh of relief. He tied you to the old, rotting couch on most days and you’d lay there in an uncomfortable position for hours until he decided to return. You didn’t know what was worse, seeing his face all the time, feeling his hot breath on your skin as he simultaneously mocked and comforted you, or being alone in an unfamiliar location, never fully certain that not some random demon would drop by and have their way with you too. 

Belphegor forced himself on you a lot. He’d satisfy his needs, exclaiming love and passion for you, but you knew better. Every once in a while, when he deemed you well behaved, he would drag an orgasm or two out of you as well, and yet, you hated the feeling. Something that is supposed to be pleasurable and exciting only brought you tears and hate toward yourself. How could your body betray you like this? You never once thought that Belphegor learned from you, although he was using all your techniques. Punishment from him was the worst, in your opinion. He’d give you scraps instead of a real meal, barely any water, or sometimes he would play a prank on you. But the worst was when he just left. No words. No disgusted look toward you. Nothing. Just silence and then you’d watch as his silhouette disappeared into the dark of the Devildom, leaving you to yourself with your thoughts. 

That’s also where he made a mistake, though. You see, being alone used to make you cry. You used to beg for him to stay because being alone was worse than being with him, in a way, but that was before you figured out how to undo the rope. Somehow, someway, after a lot of pulling and tugging, you found a way to slip one of your hands out and after that, everything else was easy. You only needed one hand to untie the other one, but there was one problem: You didn’t know what time of day it was. For the past few months, you tried to remember when Belphegor came back but your internal clock was off and you just didn’t know. The room was mostly dark and even when Belphegor opened the door to come in, you couldn’t see anything outside. You even begged him one, “Belphie please… I don’t like the dark….” but he would gently mock you and cradle you up in his arms, “awe… poor baby…. I’ll keep you safe.” Running out would be a risk and you actually didn’t leave the first time you got the ropes untied, instead pushing your hands back in. You needed to at least try to figure out when he comes and goes, and thus you started to count, in intervals of 100, and if he didn’t come back by 500, well, that’s when you knew he would be gone for at least 100 more. Or at least, that’s what you told yourself. You did this for a couple of days to see if you were correct, and on the 3rd day, when he still didn’t come back, you took that opportunity, and you ran. 

You ran out into the streets, carefully checking behind you and making note of every noise you heard. It’s been weeks, at least, since Belphegor dragged you down these streets and you couldn’t remember the way back to the House of Lamentation, “Lucifer…. I need to find Lucifer….” but you couldn’t. No way. The risk of getting lost, or caught, on your way back to the house was too big and what if Belphie was at the house? “No… he’s surely there…” So you took the back alleys, trying to sneak your way to the castle instead. All of this would have been easier with a phone but Belphie took yours and destroyed it right in front of you, which still makes you mad, but it’s whatever. “Maybe they have a payphone…?” If they do, it would be downtown and you don’t know if you can risk that. 

“I have to…” You ran around for a while, out into the main street where you saw a bunch of demons. There were street lights and you’re not quite sure if this is a smart idea on your part, but you needed to try and call Lucifer, or Diavolo, or literally anyone responsible and sane enough to safe you. “Here goes nothing…” You took a deep breath and then started walking, hoping the shredded clothes and tousled hair wouldn’t let you stand out too much. You tried to stick between bigger groups of demons, getting weird looks, but you didn’t care. “The payphone….” there was one ahead, you can see it, and a small sliver of hope rushed through you as you tried to remember Lucifer’s number. “Hey! Watch where you’re going!” You didn’t notice but you ran into some demon and he didn’t appreciate it, glaring down at you, “I-I’m sorry…!” And quickly ran off. He didn’t look very friendly and if you were to die today, it surely would’ve been by his hands, “scary…”“I know.” You paused, a cold shiver running down your back. That voice…. “Belphegor…”

He didn’t sound happy, either, but you didn’t dare turn around, keeping your eyes on the payphone ahead. Quick. Run. That’s what you thought, and that’s what you did. You ran ahead, pushing through more people and mumbling more sorrys while a deep growl erupted from behind you, “a few more steps….” You could get there and then lock yourself in. You could, you really could. “Oh no!” But you really couldn’t. Belphegor’s tail pushed out and wrapped around your neck, tripping you and you fell face first on the ground. Before you knew it, he was on top of you too, growling right next to your ear, “I know you didn’t think of running away, (Y/N).” Fear rushed through you and hopelessness, too. You were so close. Even now, you could still see the payphone; it was right there! Tears started forming in the corners of your eyes and you heard Belphegor’s familiar chuckle, “awe.. Are you sad it didn’t work?” You nodded slowly, wishing the earth would just swallow you up. 

He laughed louder, pushing your face hard against the ground before leaning in to whisper, “you’ll never escape me, (Y/N).... You didn’t think I didn’t see what you were doing, did you? Undoing the ropes… calculating how long I’ll be gone…” No… how could he know? He wasn’t there… How? He could sense your questions and he hummed softly as if he was thinking about them. His tail slithered up your leg before moving around to caress over your face, all while his hand patted through your hair roughly, mockingly, almost as if he was praising his pet. “You see… the good thing about the Devildom is that it’s always dark, and don’t you know…..

Monsters hide in the dark.” 

[snailfen]

oi! 9 and 14 for the salty asks?

-0

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

hmmm... ok i didnt think this was gonna be a hard one! then again, everytime i get a question like this i have a hard time coming up with an answer.

Oleana and Rose are up there for their writing 100%. I don't like how Oleana is just a crazy secretary in the games. im so so SO happy about her Twilight Wings Episode; but i really wish that we saw this in-game (then again i havent. seen the dlcs AT ALL so if she does show up again... i wouldnt know lol). Rose is just.... a mess. Like, I see people debate whether he's good, or bad, or morally grey, but thats the thing- I feel like his character is all OVER the place and he was just. Done so badly. I'm ok with these two otherwise but when it comes to their character writing its just. help me

Professor Bellis(?) From Pokemas. Why do you use so many languages in your dialogue PLEASE

Paulo, at least his character arc rn. Please DeNA just hurry up and make him evil already or whatever its taking forever. also give my girl Tina some time to shine on her own.... i love Paulo but DeNA drawing this out longer than it needs to be.

Can't think of any other characters I'd say I actually dont like for once.

14. Unpopular opinion about your fandom?

i need every single fandom member on twitter to move to tumblr STAT im not logging back on there for pkmn content /hj /lh

People can complain about how no one hates pokemon more than pokemon fans, or how pokemon fans are never satisfied, but thats because these games are just... disappointing coming from GameFreak.

Like, ok, I wouldnt call Pokemon Legends: Arceus terrible. I thought it was great! It was really fun and I played it for MONTHS. But theres issues that reflect how badly the time constraints are on the games quality: Its storyline and graphics aren't the best, they arent complete shit but they are pretty disappointing coming from a 90 billion dollar game development company.

I'm not saying that means they should be perfect at making games, I'm saying that means they should have the time and money to create something at least enjoyable in every aspect. Another example with SwSh: Good graphics, great character design and beautiful environment design for the towns, but oh my god did the plot of the game suffer.

PLA also came out with no Pokemon HOME compatibility as well as BDSP, which is also disappointing: you think that these games would have compatibility soon after release but that didnt come out until May 18th, approx. 4 months after PL:A came out. IIRC, Sun and Moon got Bank compatibility 2 months after their release. These games are coming out missing core features and adding them so much later! It's disappointing.

With ScVi coming out tomorrow (despite being leaked COMPLETELY) I can't say my hopes are too high about it, and its likely I'll have to wait until Christmas for it to see the whole thing for myself. ScVi apparently began development in 2019, but unless it can reflect that it's been given the time it needed, they have GOT to stop cranking these games out every year.

[blackbackedjackal]

hey, im new to vulture culture and have been thinking about getting into tanning! i’ve been following you and a couple other people on here for a while but it’s hard to find reliable information. my dog is getting up there in age and i don’t think i’ll be able to tan him on my own, but i’ve heard a lot of mixed reviews about some people. like they’re popular but maybe their work isn’t very consistent. there’s this guy flayote that seems to have really good reviews, but i wanted to see if anyone i trust has ever heard of him. is there anyone in here you would say i should stay away from?

Tanning is really fun! It can be expensive to get into compared to other methods of animal processing, but it's very much worth the hard work and gives you a very deep respect for the animals! I'm working on a very detailed tanning guide specifically written for new and advanced tanners that covers everything I've learned. It can be very intimidating to get into when you're first trying to gather info, and even as I type away at my outlines I always feel like I'm forgetting some tips and tricks that would be good to share lol

I haven't heard any like bad-bad reviews since the celestialvintage drama several years ago. Tbh, I'm always surprised to see other tanners in the community! Flayote is the only dedicated tanner I know of who also takes commissions and has great reviews. I've haven't gotten anything from him as of yet but both of my best friends have gotten stuff from him and they were super happy with the hides! Again, I don't know of any other tanners off the top of my head who also take commissions. Most of the ones I know are taxidermists who do in-house work and don't offer any or many commission slots.

I will say that tanning is a very difficult process and even experienced people aren't always consistent. Many things can go wrong with the process, and with pets it can be even more stressful to make them as perfect as possible for the client. That being said, you want to look at people who do have overall positive reviews and have a tanning success rate of at least 85% or more. Again, shit happens. Sometimes the clients aren’t 100% satisfied, sometimes the postal service screws you over and you have to tan severely damaged raw skins, sometimes the animal just falls apart, and sometimes the tanner makes mistakes with chemical balances, accidentally rips holes in the hides, didn’t salt or drying the skins properly etc. A lot more can go the wrong way with tanning then can go the right way. My advice is to check their social media page and see if they post good pictures of the leather side of the animals they’ve tanned, and also check to see if they’re had experience tanning many different species. Someone who can tan rabbits well may not be equipped to tan something greasy or thick skinned like ranched foxes or domestic dogs. And tbh, check to see if the tanner talks about their tanning mistakes as well. Honesty is the best policy you can have when taking tanning commissions (hell that applies to any commissions). I tell my clients every, single, detail about how the animal is doing through the entire process, especially with the pets. However, because of the anxiety I feel when tanning animals that aren't mine and knowing something could go wrong or the client may just not be satisfied with my work, I stick to tanning things for myself and close friends and pets upon request.

Hope that answers your questions anon! If anyone wants to drop a link to their tanning work feel free to do so in the replies/reblogs :>

[neufdoigts]

I JUST FINISHED THE WISDOM OF CROWDS AND I HAVE SOME RANTING TO DO????

-holy FUCK where do I begin

-im so used to Abercrombie not killing off main characters that up until the moment orso died I was 100% sure he wouldn't die oh my god ORSO

-i knew glokta was the weaver I knew it I knew it I knew it

-hildi I love you so much I can't believe you're on bayaz's side now but I'm so excited for you too

-clovers new student is ummmm.... Logen without the fun jokes I'm terrified

-i spent the entire series being like oh god I'm so sure Zuri is an eater because glokta introduced her to savine but that's literally midderland racism I can't think that and then Abercrombie Abercrombied me

-tallow!?! All my fave sidekicks,,, hildi, tallow, jurand.. they all get good endings I guess but.. not the beck-type endings I wanted for them 🥺

-the ruthlessness and brutality of Leo and savines marriage literally had my heard racing for the last 20% of the book

-the amount of character development Leo goes through in this book is 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

-i started this series liking Rikke, being slightly annoyed by Leo because he was just less funny jezel but i was interested in his storyline, and kinda loving orso, and really hating savine because child labour (and I guess clover and broad and vick were there)

-and I ended it loving Rikke, being so so so frustrated for Leo and by Leo, crying over orso's corpse, and wanting to punch savine being she's so smart and scary and urghrgrhrvh she literally says she's the villain but im still like please don't be the villain and I've never felt so conflicted over a character

-like in the past it's been like ya know, glokta, pretty brutal guy, logen, maybe hes murdered more people than winter, but I was basically on their side because I read from their povs

-but the way I just go from wanting someone to stab savine to wanting savine see her goals through chapter by chapter is literally crazy. Like she frustrates me so much, I hate her, I want her to win, I think she's totally reprehensible, I think she's redeemable, I think she's irredeemable, I think she's already been redeemed

-like I probably like Leo's arc the best out of everyone but Abercrombie has never made me conflicted over a character like savine, she sparks so many feelings in me, literally shaking

-rikke has come out of this entire series on my good side tho like,, she had me raising eyebrows when she fired isern but then she double girlbossed me

-even betraying orso I somehow can forgive her for

-fucking tunny getting out of this again.. that man is a slippy dippy

-i really hate broads ending! And savine is just here. Making my blood boil.

-i can picture in a future trilogy tho where hildi and may have a duel of ledgers... Amazing...

-i hope in the next trilogy old man clover backstabs bayaz one more time that goddamn bald wizard 🗡

-remember that old dude broad saw in a pub in a lil hatred with a lot of scars and a piece of his ear missing... I held out hope for so long that logen would show up one last time. I have no idea what he would do but I still hoped 😭

-GORST DYING GLORIOUSLY WAS DEEPLY SATISFYING BUT LEO REALLY ANNOYED ME BY NOT APPRECIATING THAT THE BRAT

-I can't bear to see Rikke lose the north in the next trilogy I just can't

-(also somehow I feel really bad for calder)

-i know I got my one happy couple in temple and shy but would it kill Abercrombie to give me.. maybe just one more.. sighs

-(also great job temple what a king get that coin)

-this trilogy is about parallels the old trilogy was about cycles what does that mean I don't know

-VICK BREAKING THE CYCLE BY JUST FUCKING OFF YES!! GOOD FOR HER! pleasedontgotostyria

-so do people know that glokta is back or?? Is he just gonna sit in a room for the rest of his life plotting and pulling strings? When is he gonna write that fencing manual? 🥺

-when he "retired" I was low-key hoping that he really was gonna write a fencing manual and two trilogies down the line people would be reading about various sword stances and someone would be like "you know back when I was a wee lad he was arch lector!" And then the pov character will be like idc

-when we were introduced to Rikke I thought like hearing a prophecy and believing it to be true and therefore bringing the prophecy into reality would be a theme of this series but I was very wrong her prophecies just seem to be straight up right ig...?

-its crazy bold for Abercrombie to not write a single pov character I was both interested in and wanted to root for (except mayyyybeeee Rikke)

-ive ignored all my responsibilities for the last 2 weeks reading ohmygodwhathaveidone

-10/10 I need to punch a wall

[mythichang]

➠ pairing . . . george weasley x reader

➠ genre . . . fluff!!! pining on both parts, pretty short but i think it was a lot of sweetness 😣😣 they ARE students!!! same grade and all that jazz

➠ warnings . . . nothing really!! although they doooo talk about butts but,,, you’ll seee,,,,,

➠ word count . . . 1.8k

➠ authors note . . . this is super duper late and was requested by anon so looooong ago!! i did fall out of the fandom for a bit because tiktok sort of made me realize that a lot of people were on the wrong side of my many situations, but hp will always be in my heart so here i am!!! i hope you all enjoy!!! talk to me about this imagine!! give me scenarios or ask this george and yn from this universe a question!!

➠ masterlist

george was being quite adorable on that particular monday afternoon

you had taken your usual seat, a two-seater splat in the middle of the class

you hadn’t even noticed that the red head fumbled into class, excited to sit besides you as you were too engrossed in your book

it was another thriller, one that made your skin crawl but in the most satisfying way

george got to his seat besides you, a smile on his face as he watched you bite on your lip the tiniest of bit in concentration

he plopped down beside you, head tilted to watch your concentrated face

although he wasn’t as confident as his twin brother, he always watched from afar, eyes full of puppy love

and by afar, he meant right beside you— because that’s where he always was— right beside you

befriending you hadn’t been the easiest of tasks, your quietness not being filling enough for any other person

but he admired the way you didn’t have to yell at the top of your lungs about your excitement

or the way you could sit with anyone in silence and make them feel more comfortable than words could ever manage

really, he was sprung on yOu and only YoU

it wasn’t a surprise to anyone really

not with those longing looks and the way the boy follows you around like a lost puppy

a lost cute puppy albeit

you didn’t mind either

he was an incredibly sweet boy and managed to help you out a lot in different instances

like the way he helps you find the right words to speak to someone whenever you’re stuck

or helping decipher exactly what others are feeling, since you had the smallest of trouble doing a mundane thing

he helps in all of the classes you two have together and is often found getting you to pull away from your little bubble

it’s a great bubble, you love the bubble, it’s always been YOUR bubble but you didn’t mind stepping out of it for the red head boy with the mischievous twin brother

“did you get a chance to study for OWLs?” the boy pulls you out of trance

you look up, a small smile blossoming upon your face at the sight of your favorite boys face

“i did, you?” you ask faintly, gently putting your book back into the small bag that helped you carry all of your books thought out the day

“not a chance.”

“im guessing you want my notes?” you turn in your seat, arm perched up on the desk as you leaned your head up on the palm of your hand

“hmm, i think i would greatly appreciate it.”

“oh, you think?” you laugh softly at his words, same bright smile on your face

you could feel your mood immediately spike as you spoke to him

he was so incredibly comforting and kind, something that you couldn’t find often at hogwarts with rivalries blooming left to right

“i'm not saying i would decline if you offered them up.”

“who’s offering them?” you feign a look of innocence as you exaggeratedly look around the classroom and back at him. “i don’t see anyone doing that.”

“it’s you. you’re offering them up.” he softly pokes the side of your stomach, making you squirm in your seat.

“ask nicely and i might consider handing them over.” you click your tongue and tap your wrist as if signaling that his time was almost up.

“y/n, may i kindly take a look at your notes so that i don’t totally bomb the OWLs?”

“i think i need a little more begging.”

“you suck”

—

it wasn’t as if you wanted to be staring at him

he was just there— standing there so gloriously beside his twin brother

it was no doubt that the weasley twins were popular around hogwarts

you weren't sure if it was their likability or the parties they seemed to make a thousand times more fun

whatever it was, they ravished in it, not that you cared either, even if it did get you into too many uncomfy situations

seeing george oh-so happy among the crowd of wizards was oh-so gratifying

he smiled so bright that his pearly whites shone throughout wherever he was

now was one of the moments, except you weren’t anywhere special— just another day of sitting across the room from one another in herbology

professor sprout had separated the two of you in hopes that you wouldn’t mess or speak to one another in class any longer

that didn’t work out great,,, clearly

because now you were dazed

dazed as you watch the boy laugh and work with his brother

you weren’t quite sure what was going on between them but you knew you looked like one of those ridiculous people in those ridiculous romantic movies

where the main character is staring at the boy they find so attractive— hearts floating around their head as they sigh out in happiness as if they were watching their entire world

ridiculous ridiculous ridiculous

but could you blame yourself? was it really your fault or was it george’s for being very cute? for having a laugh and smile that just manages to grasp your entire self?

it was george’s fault you like to think

“what are you doing?” the sudden voice makes you jump in your spot, utensils falling onto the floor with a loud clatter

you look down at the utensils out of embarrassment, not wanting to make any eye contact with anybody

“sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” angela bends down over with you, helping pick up your things

“it’s quite alright,” you mumble softly, not exactly knowing what so say

“i figure you’re into george.” the girl’s sudden words throw you off, your head snapping up to look at the beautiful girl

“w-what? where… um, where’d you get that? it’s nothing but… lies.” you sputter out as quickly as possible— and quite literally too loudly as many others glanced to you and the girl

you could feel your cheeks brighten up even more

a sense of deadly remorse wafts over your already flushed body as angelina gave you an unimpressed look

“alright, calm down, it was just a random conclusion i’ve came up with.”

“that’s a crazy hypothesis!” you continue to sputter out your words as if in disgust of her word

“it wouldn't be that crazy, now, would it?” she laughs gently as the two of you stood up, finally coming up from your crouch on the floor

“he’s just a friend”

“it’s no big deal, i’m definitely into fred. nothing to be ashamed of.”

“yeah, well everyone knows that.” you sigh, fixing up your utilities, angelina helping you with the task

“and no one knows about you and george? only so many can be as, and i mean this in the nicest way possible, oblivious as you two.”

“what’s that supposed to mean?” eyebrows scrunched, you turn to her

were you supposed to be offended? you felt as if you should but you didn’t care enough about it any longer

“it means... make a move.” she shrugs from beside you. “i don’t think it’d ruin anything. if anyithing, you two could stop running circles around one another and finally make out.”

“you are a very crude person.”

“masking out is crude to you? bless your soul, no wonder you haven’t noticed him.”

and that was where the conversation stopped, only making your thoughts run 100 mph

what was she saying exactly? was george as into you as you are into him?

it made your brain feel mushy and it was a horrible feeling

one filled with anxiousness, trying to figure out exactly what being a teenager with feelings meant

but it pleasantly relaxed you to know that angelina was going through the same things as a teenager herself

having started hanging out with her and listening to her advice, you began to notice more things about george and the way he was around you

he was a lot more touchy than you ever remembered, and not in an uncomfortable wait either

but what seemed platonic and innocent to you suddenly sent an alarm through out you (again, not a bad one,,,, just a slightly nervous one)

what were you supposed to do???????

you were always told that you were HORRIBLE with emotions and confrontation

confront him about your feelings???? now how were you supposed to deal with both???

you were unnerved to no end and george was quick to catch in as well

“okay, what’s up your butt?” at hearing george’s voice, you jump up slightly

“there’s nothing up my butt.”

“yes there is. you have that look.”

“the ‘there’s-something-up-my-butt’ look?” you scoff lightly, hoping to rid of the conversation with a tiny bit of humor

“exaclty the look. tell me what’s wrong.”

“nothings wrong.” you shrug him off, turning back to your book, one of which you had to read the first sentence repeatedly

you couldn’t even sit beside him any longer without feeling as if you’re about to burst with terrifying feelings and hypothesis, courtesy of angelina

“is someone bullying you?”

“what?” you turn to him in disbelief. “who would bully me?”

“i don’t know,” he mumbles softly not liking the reaction he managed to grab from you. “just... you look... weird.”

“and here i thought this flimsy uniform looked great with my legs.”

“okay sassypants, i’ll let you be.”

you sigh softly at the sight of a defeated look on him

your mother always said, “if something is painful but can be rid of in an instant, rip it off like a bandaid.”

you always thought it was dumb, why would you rip off a bandaid? bandaids were there to make you feel better so it should be working on whatever it’s put on

ridiculous

you’re ridiculous

YOU ARE RIDICULOUS

you knew you needed to stop being such a wussy, it was a bad look on you

that much you could tell at george’s hesitant looks

screw it

“want to go on a date?” it was too late to stop the words from coming out.

george looks over at you, wide eyes

you felt as if time was suddenly going to slow as you awaited his answer

so far,,,? things didn’t look too great for you

but you weren’t going to strike-out immediately, maybe he was too shocked

“you want to go on a date? with me?”

“no, actually, im asking professor snape... yes with you.” your cheeks were flushed red as you refused to look the boy in the eye

“sassypants is coming out again.” the melodious tone of his laughter reaching your ears, making you feel at ease

“i’d love to go on a date with you.” you shut your eyes tight, hands covering your face

“goodness, i felt like i was suffocating.” you mumble, embarrassment continuously coursing through your body

“is that what was up your butt?”

“you really do have a way with words. yes, that’s what was up my butt.”

“hmm, i knew something was wrong. weirdo, you could have asked me so long ago!”

“you could’ve told me too!”

[thosch3i]

Xiao Yuliang Interview [Eng Trans]

[Photo: XYL’s dog]

so remember this post? yeah well i wound up doing a mostly full translation of the entire 6 minute interview on twitter. some parts are paraphrased and a few details were skipped bc he sometimes repeated himself and there were one or two details i wasn’t 100% sure of, but other than that an eng transcript of the full interview is below the cut:

1. Introduce your role in "Ultimate Note"?

XYL: In Ultimate Note I play Zhang Qiling, Xiaoge.

2. What kind of impression does this character leave in your heart?

XYL: Before, I thought he was a really strong, and then a very cool, and then a very cold/detached person. But later, I finished reading the novel and read the script, and I felt like he's someone who lets your heart ache for him. The feeling he gives me--because once I was reading the script in a car, and I almost wanted to cry for him, because he's always searching for the things he's lost. And he's very strong, but he wasn't born strong; he also went through a lot, and he made himself strong. He can bleed, and he can get hurt; it's just that he doesn't say anything, and he doesn't show that he's in pain.

3. Talk about the initial pressure of receiving this role?

XYL: When I got this role, the pressure was really really big, but I also thought I was pretty lucky, because I'd played Zhang Qiling before, and I get to play him again, and I think that's pretty lucky. But the pressure is too big, on set right now, the pressure is very big.

4. Netizens were pretty satisfied with your performance; have you seen these comments?

XYL: When Sha Hai was airing, I saw their comments. Some of them approved, and I was happy, but others--like, saying some suggestions or opinions--I also looked at them. I also looked at the performances of other actors who played Zhang Qiling and comments on their performances. I used them as a reference, and I learned from the experiences/evaluations of others.

5. What was the greatest challenge of playing Zhang Qiling?

XYL: The biggest challenge is that there are too few lines. It's really hard to act! [Xiaoge] has some expressions where it's just, you can't make them too obvious or too "unrestrained" because his actions are also very restrained, but if you're too restrained then everyone just thinks you don't have any reactions. And the editors are also very hardworking, because they'll have 4 pages, and I won't have a single line, just reactions. The others will talk for 10 minutes, and I'll just be reacting. [Xiaoge] is a person with few/no words, but with his whole heart, he wants to go care for others...it's very difficult; this "no lines" is very difficult. Another thing is fight scenes are very difficult, and the weather is too hot.

6. What are some scenes that left the deepest impression on you?

XYL: Like when it's 3am, and we're running through a wild river, the water is all up to our waists, and we don't know what's underground. I was just afraid there were snakes, you know? Nothing we can do, just run. And there's also, because the filming location is at Xishuangbanna, there really are snakes. We've seen snakes etc on set, so we were afraid accidents would happen. Thankfully they didn't. And there was also when we were rubbing mud on our faces during the hot day. Actually, what we were rubbing was chocolate paste. When the chocolate on our faces dried, we spread on more, and it feels like you've become a "chocolate person", not a "mud person". I also tasted it--the BTS side clips recorded it; the taste is okay. [t/n: here is a link to that clip]

7. How did it feel working with the other actors in the crew?

XYL: Liu Yuning-laoshi [t/n: Hei Xiazi] is really nice. He doesn't have a temper, and he's a very calm and tranquil person. I think he's really nice. Xiao Xi [t/n: lit. “Little Xi”, nickname for Zeng Shunxi aka Wu Xie] is a little mischievous. Xiao Xi likes to stir up trouble on set and play around. In any case he plays around with Pangzi and me, but Liu Yuning-laoshi is more tranquil, not quite the same as [his character] in the show.

8. Before you posted a vlog caring for your pet on Weibo, why don't you introduce your pet?

XYL: My dog's name is a character I played once; my mom named him. Because we'd just finished filming that show, and then my mom got a dog, so she just called him my name in the show. Tell me, isn't that annoying? [t/n: drama was called 反骗天下/Fan Pian Tian Xia and his role was called 米若/Mi Ruo; his dog is apparently called 米诺/Mi Nuo.]

9. You've been an actor for awhile now; can you discuss what being an actor feels like?

XYL: Initially, before I became an actor, I thought, "Oh, cool". Everyday you're just, wow, holding weapons, cool! But now I think it's so hard. Especially while shooting this show, I got a sty for a month, and it's still not better even now. [t/n: you can definitely see the swelling under his eye in ep1] I think this sty is from accepting this role, or because of work. In any case, it's still not better. But it's no problem; thankfully, my hair can cover it. You also have to be careful of safety on set; real blades can slice open your hands. Once, I wasn't careful and cut my wrist, but thankfully the doctor's stitching skills were pretty good. When he was still stitching, I even said, "Doctor, you have to stitch it well, okay, I'm an actor, I use this hand to perform", and he said "Okay". After the stitches were done, he asked me, "Are you satisfied with the stitches?" The results were pretty good; it didn't really leave a scar.

10. Finally, promote this show to our fans.

XYL: You all have to watch our "Ultimate Note", because filming was really tough, and we've diligently tried to accomplish these three roles [t/n: the iron triangle, I’m assuming] and later on some of the the details of many of the books. I hope you will see similarities to the novel in some of the show's scenes.

and we are done! so yeah, i think his take on xiaoge’s character was the most important part, but some of the other stuff (listening to him complain about some things lmao) was kinda funny too. im still laughing about the whole ‘im an actor i need this hand to perform’ bit bc dude you literally sliced yourself open w a knife badly enough to need stitches but that’s your first priority???? glad you’re dedicated to your job though i guess but LOL

Quick question/answer:

1. What do you want to say to Zhang Qiling?

XYL: Xiaoge, you've worked hard.

2. Who from the show would you pick to go with you on an adventure?

XYL: I’ll choose...I'll choose Pangzi, because he'll definitely bring food. And he's fat, and he's pretty joyful, oh right, I can also bully him.

3. Describe the level of your cooking skills.

XYL: Cooking skills? The rank of instant noodles. Just boiling instant noodles, then adding the flavor packets, and then tomatoes, eggs...instant noodles.

4. If you're not restricted, what kind of role do you most want to play?

XYL: If I'm not restricted, then I want to play that guy who, in the morning, is just delivering takeout or is really well-behaved and wears glasses, that type, and then at night he pushes his hair back like this [xyl mimes pushing his hair back], and he starts to....different types...in any case, like split personalities, right, split personalities.

5. A sentence to describe your ideal life.

XYL: My family and I are healthy, and I have enough money to go live a normal life, eat/drink whatever I want, travel with my family, and just grow up slowly.

oh right additional note, in zsx's interview, when asked which character he'd take, he said xiaoge without hesitation. and the interviewer asked if he wanted to know who xiaoge picked and zsx was all "he didn't pick me did he...I'll be leaving now, thank you~" 😂

[flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash]

Oh you bet your ass im sending you an ask abt this

I'm shit at talking to people so I barley know you really but I'm so proud of you for finishing ID! And you should be proud of yourself! SO proud! Over five dang years working on this AND YOU DID IT. IT'S DONE AND IT'S GREAT. Still to this day it's my favorite fic. My comfort fic. The one that convinced me to finally pull the trigger and actually watch the Walking Dead. And read other Negan fics and find all the other awesome writers i follow now. Who are almost exclusively who i follow on tumblr now 😅 it was your Hopper one shot that got me into fics initially but ID was the one that made me realize that fanfic is fucking awesome and that there are so many ways writers can build on and improve the stories i love so much. It is truly amazing and worth the wait to finally read the final chapter. And with a satisfying ending as well, not you just being like "ok i dont care anymore im just gonna bang out the last couple chapters so i can call it done" which is common for fics that have taken this long to finish. 11/10 humor and 100/10 smut as well. Fantastic. There's heart and love for all of the characters right up to the end, and it's wonderful. From Maria and Ben to Trixie and fucking Amber you have depth to everyone in it and there isnt a single character that is flat or boring. Truly a well-rounded story and when you finally decide to write an original full-length novel im sure it will be just as awesome.

You did a great job and you should be proud as fuck for all you put into it. Thank you so much for sharing it with all of us 😊💜💜

This ask made me grin SO hard and also get a bit misty XD It makes me so happy to know my stories got someone into the wonderful world of fanfiction! And I'm glad you enjoyed the ending! When I came back after such a long hiatus, I was secretly terrified that it would be obvious where I had left off, and that the story wouldn't feel like the same writer after me being away from it for so long. I also tried very hard not to rush it towards an ending, because I'd be lying if I said it wasn't tempting to just throw it all together so I could call it done lol. So thank you for letting me know it didn't come across that way, and my efforts to bring it to a satisfying and not rushed ending paid off! Omg, I'm gonna miss those side characters SO much! I got emotional when I realized I won't be writing Ben anymore. I didn't expect to grow as attached to his character as I did, and I love that readers also grew to love him and the others!

Also, can I just say that whatever little voice is telling you that you can't talk to people...tell it to eff off, because I don't think that's true at all! To be very honest, you are one of the blogs whose comments I've always looked forward to once you started reading ID! After a 2 year hiatus I wasn't sure that anyone would still care about new updates, but you quickly jumped right back on board with me! There was a comfort in me knowing that I could count on seeing a comment from you about your reactions and thoughts to each update. I love every single reader, regardless of if they interact with me or not. However, it's definitely the readers who take the time to always comment, such as yourself, who stick out to me, and I appreciate it so much. So thank YOU for giving me that! <3