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#but im afraid other ppl wont like it ykno?? im not too worried abt it from lgbt ppl but mostly w cis men i still kinda feel like theyll
sad-mcmuffin
ยท
4 years
Note
hi odd we've been mutuals for years now and i just wanna say u've always been hot and u always will be. fat hairy ppl fuck!
Ilysm my guy im working on accepting that but its always nice to hear ๐๐๐
#srsly ty ily
#to elaborate on my dilemma if anyones interested:
#i genuinely like my body hair it helps w my dysphoria and shaving is literally painful for me bc of my sensitive skin
#but im afraid other ppl wont like it ykno?? im not too worried abt it from lgbt ppl but mostly w cis men i still kinda feel like theyll
#expect a certain level of femininity from me j by looking at me and then when ykno the clothes come off they wont be into it
#i need to let go of that but like if i was trying to be physically intimate with someone and they show any sign of like disgust even if
#they dont mean to it would absolutely destroy any confidence i have
#and im so terrified of that happening that i push ppl away and remain celibate lmaoooo
#i havent had sex in over a year bc of this fear lmao
#but im working on it!! im talking to this guy and its long distance rn bc covid but once im back in nyc we're gonna bone down
#i am genuinely excited to see him and do stuff so im hoping i can use that to push past my fear and let myself be a lil vulnerable ykno??
#plus theres the whole fat femme ppl are pushed to perform extreme femininity in ordered to be attractive and like respected lol
#and lowkey i feel like w girls they expect a certain level of masculinity from me so me being so curvy is a bit of an insecurity there
#but thats mostly bc my ex lowkey kinda fetishied me being trans lmao
#idk if she meant to but that was v much the vibe i got everytime we were intimate
#and again without clothes i dont feel like im masculine enough bc of my tig ol biddies n shit
#so yeah im figuring out my shit lmao
#but i rly am getting better w it im trying to let go of anxities and open up a bit and like keep in mind that if they arent into my body or
#want me to change it then theyre a shit person and they dont deserve to fuck me lmao
#anyway thx for letting me vent ily guys ๐๐๐
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