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sunshinesteviee · 2 years ago

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absolutely smitten - r.b.

summary: robin asks you if she can paint your nails, and you return the favor; robin buckley x reader wc: 1.9k warnings: nothing but fluff a/n: my bisexual ass felt the need to write a lil fluff with robin, and a wonderful anon gave me this idea!! i've never written robin before, so be kind pls lol i'm still figuring her out! if you have any constructive criticism/feedback, i'd love to hear it! big thank u to @familyvideostevie for reading this before i posted it ily. i hope y'all enjoy xoxo

Masterlist

You’re laying on the floor on your stomach, legs stretched out behind you as you sort through all of your nail polish bottles. You have entirely too many, several shades of every color in the rainbow and beyond, and you can’t decide which one you want to use. Letting out a dramatic sigh, you press your cheek into your fist as you glance up to your bed where Robin is sitting. She’s pretending to leaf through one of your magazines, doing a terrible job of acting like she hadn’t been watching you. Smiling to yourself, you call her name, “Robin?”

“Huh?” she startles, closing the magazine a bit too quickly as she peers over the edge of the bed to look down at you, “Yeah?”

“What color should I paint my nails?” you ask, gesturing to the bottles laid out on the rug, pushing your lips out into a small pout, “I have too many, I can’t decide.”

“Hmm…” she trails off, and you can practically see her brain moving a thousand miles a minute, even just to suggest a nail polish color for you. Her bottom lip is tucked between her teeth, deep in thought, before reaching down to point to one of the colors, “Maybe that one?”

It’s a soft buttercup yellow, and you’re not at all surprised by her choice. You know without a doubt that it’s her favorite color on you; even before you’d admitted your feelings for each other, she never failed to compliment you when you were wearing the color. Your fingers brush hers as you reach down to grab the bottle, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips, “Yeah, okay. I like that color.”

“Me too,” she murmurs in reply, sitting back up on the bed. You can see a faint blush dusting over her freckled cheeks from where you’re sitting and you can’t help but grin as you sit up and then give the small bottle a shake before untwisting the top. Just as you’re about to swipe the paint over your first nail, she speaks up again, “Wait, can I… umm can I do it?” She looks nervous, as if you might turn her down.

“You wanna paint my nails for me?”

“I mean, i-if that’s okay with you. If not, that’s fine, but I—”

“Of course, Robs,” you nod, cutting off her nervous rambling in an attempt to soothe her, “Can I pick a color and paint your nails after?”

The smile that breaks out on Robin’s face is contagious — it always is, though — and she nods quickly, climbing off of the bed to settle onto the floor across from you, “Sure. Just nothing neon, that’s too distracting for me.”

“Deal,” you nod, holding your pinky out to her. Her pinky is wrapped around yours in seconds, and you both lean in, pressing a kiss to the other’s finger softly. Before she can pull back, you lean up towards her, lips just barely ghosting over the high point of her cheekbone softly. Another blush springs onto the apples of her cheeks almost immediately as you pass the bottle of nail polish to her and scoot back to make more room.

“Uhh…” Robin is dazed, but then again, it’s a pretty constant feeling for her when she’s near you. It’s a wonder she can ever function around you and your pretty smile. After a moment, she shakes her head and clears her throat, scooting down to be closer as she starts to ramble again, “I mean, just so you know… well, you know I don’t paint my nails very often, so I’m not very good at it, but I promise I’ll try my best to be careful. And I won’t get any on the rug! Probably.”

“Robin, you’ll do fine,” you assure her, handing the color back to her and holding your hands out, palms facing the floor.

She nods again after a moment, taking your hand into hers gently. There’s a moment of hesitation, but then she lifts your hand, pressing a kiss to the back of it, causing you to push your hot cheek into your shoulder, nearly shying away from the gesture. Your relationship is still brand new, and you rarely engage in PDA seeing as you live in Hawkins, so any time Robin is affectionate, your whole body feels like it’s on fire. If she notices, she doesn’t say anything as she dips the brush into the polish, wiping the excess off onto the rim of the bottle before carefully brushing over the nail on your index finger carefully.

It’s quiet in your room, save for the music that’s playing quietly from the cassette player that sits near your window. You’re humming along quietly, barely audible, with the music as you watch Robin work diligently. Your usually loud and talkative girlfriend is quiet as she concentrates; you’ve quickly learned you just need to give her something to focus on to calm her racing mind. She’s sitting with one knee bent up so she can rest your hand on it, and her other leg is tucked underneath. You can feel her breath, warm against your skin, she’s sitting so close with her head ducked down to see clearly as she moves onto painting the third nail. Your favorite part, though, is that she’s concentrating so hard that the tip of her tongue is poking out of the side of her mouth.

Something inside of your chest is bursting as you watch her, the warm feeling of admiration curling and twisting inside of you. Around your heart and lungs and rib cage. Maybe even your spleen, though you have no idea where that is in your body, or what it does. Robin could tell you, though, you’re sure of that much. You know you’re grinning like a fool as she looks up, having finished painting one of your hands, but you don’t have it in you to care. You really like her.

“Okay, the first hand is done! It’s not terrible, but don’t get me wrong, it’s not good. I’ll do your other hand now. I—“ she trails off when she notices you staring, “What? Did I mess it up?”

You shake your head quickly, “No! I just… you’re really cute when you’re concentrating, Robs. I really like you.”

The blush on her cheeks is back with a vengeance, the pink nearly overtaking the pretty freckles dotted all over her face. She lets out an embarrassed squeak of a laugh as her smile takes up her entire face. You’re thinking about how much you want to kiss her when she smiles like that, and it seems she’s in your head, because she leans forward, planting one hand on the rug between you, the other coming up to cup your cheek gently. Her eyes flick between yours and then your lips before she closes the small space between you, nose nudged into yours, lips soft against your own. You’re not sure you’ll ever get over the feeling of kissing her.

Your hand moves practically on its own accord, coming up to slip into her hair, but before you can get anywhere close, Robin pulls back quickly, eyes wide. Slightly startled, worried something is wrong, you give her a confused look. Her long fingers wrap around your wrist delicately, yanking it away from her hair, “Don’t ruin all my hard work!”

“Jesus!” you gasp, lips pushing out into a pout, upset that she’d broken off the kiss much too early, “I thought something was wrong!”

“Sorry,” she gives you a sheepish smile, “It’s just, your nails aren’t dry yet and I don’t want them to smudge. Let me do your other hand. The sooner I do it, the sooner they’ll dry, and the sooner I can kiss you again.”

You can’t argue with that logic and mumble in agreement, letting Robin take your other hand and get back to work. Just before she brushes the paint over your nail, her eyes flash up to yours with a grin, and she leans forward to quickly peck your lips again.

A comfortable quiet falls over the two of you again as Robin goes back to concentrating on painting your nails as cleanly as she can. You can’t help yourself when you lean forward and press a kiss to her forehead as she runs her own nail along the edge of yours to clean up some of the paint. When she’s done her head pops back up as she twists the top back onto the bottle, “Okay, I’m done.”

You hold your hands up, admiring the soft yellow adorning your nails and nod as you glance up at Robin, “It looks good, Robs. Can I still paint yours?”

“Yeah,” she nods quickly, more than willing to make you happy however she can. But then she adds, “When yours are dry.”

“Okay, okay,” you concede, lips twisting into a smile. You begin sorting through the colors, trying to pick something for her she wouldn’t normally choose. Robin doesn’t wear nail polish often, but when she does, it’s always something dark, usually black or dark blue. Part of you wants to choose something crazy and paint her nails bubblegum pink, but you know she’d be itching to take it off way too soon.

After a few moments, you pick one of your reds. It’s not a dark red that she might pick, but rather something a bit brighter, more of a scarlet color. You hold it up to her, silently asking if she’s okay with it as you wait for her reaction. She nods, grateful that it isn’t hot pink or neon blue or something that totally isn’t her.

It isn’t as quiet as you paint her nails — with a lot more precision — as she tells you about her day. You’re listening intently as she rambles on about band practice and how she almost lost the mouthpiece for her trumpet, and before you have time to reply, is jumping to a different story about something stupid Steve said at work. She’s still talking by the time you’re finished, but you let her keep going, absolutely enamored with how animated she could get. It isn’t until she pauses and finds you watching her, your chin resting on your knees, that she pauses, cheeks flushing instantly, “Oh, sorry, I’m doing it, aren’t I? I’m rambling again.”

“It’s okay, I like listening to you.”

Robin smiles bashfully, head tilting to one side as she lifts her hands to look at the color of her nails, “Ugh, you did a much better job than me.”

“Well, I should hope so,” you tease.

She looks up from her hands, gaping at you, “Rude!”

You dissolve into giggles, shifting so you’re laying on the floor on your back. Lifting your hands so the palms are facing the ceiling, you admire Robin’s work, “No, they’re really not that bad, love.”

Her hand appears in the air next to yours as she shifts to lay down on her back next to you, and while you’re in the middle of nitpicking your work, her hand slides into yours smoothly. Her fingers slip between the spaces of yours, interlocking together as she drags your hands down, the back of your hand pressing to her chest, still mindful of your sticky nails.

When you turn your head to look at her, she’s already staring at you, messy bangs falling into her face. You’re impossibly close, so close you could count each individual freckle on her face if you wanted. You move in the tiniest bit closer, the tip of your nose nudging into hers. Before your lips can meet, she murmurs, “I really like you, too, by the way.”

#robin buckley #robin buckley x reader #robin buckley blurb #robin buckley fluff #robin buckley oneshot #robin buckley imagine #girlfriend!robin buckley #girlfriend!robin #sunshinehollandd writing #sunshinehollandd

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bopbopstyles · 4 years ago

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3. More Than a Song

SERIES RATING: M (sex)

CHAPTER WORD COUNT: 9.7k

MASTERLIST | INSPO TAG | ASK

Y/N promised herself she would never date a musician. It was her one rule–her only rule, actually–when it came to dating. But then, Harry Styles rolled into her life and asked her to break it, just this once. And this is what happened.

a/n: prepare for ANGST! and dunkirk premiere harry aka one of his best looks ever :) also thank u to @havethetimeofyourstyles for making my line breaks bc i’m inept at making things xoxo

pls reblog to spread the word about only exception! 🥰

“Baby,” Harry said, turning to her from where he stood in his closet. “Can you help me with my collar? I can’t get it.”

Y/N set down her phone—she was ready first, which wasn’t surprising considering it took Harry ages to get ready, partially because he kept getting distracted with her. He’d touch her, run his hands all over her, ask if he could get her out of her lingerie, and she’d have to remind him that she’d barely even had it on and they had an important event. “Sure.”

Harry looked dashing—he always did. After much debate, they had decided on a simple white silk short-sleeved button down and a pair of flared black pants, cool enough for May in LA, but still perfectly Harry. Y/N had painted his nails last night a pastel purple while they had watched a documentary about sheep—which Harry had selected—and the color popped against the neutrals of the rest of the outfit. Shoes were still up in the air, but Y/N was trying to get him to wear the yellow loafers he’d gotten recently, the ones she was so obsessed with she was considering stealing for herself.

Somehow Harry always managed to mess up his collars before big nights, the nerves probably getting to him. Y/N smoothed the material on his shoulders to relax him before popping up his collar and folding it back down crisply. “There you go.” In the mirror in front of Harry, her eyes trailed down his body, from his sweet curls she had labored over styling in the bathroom, to the recently tailored pants he wore. She wrapped her arms around his waist and squeezed, a smile dancing onto Harry’s face at the action. “Nervous, bubs?”

He turned his head and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. “Bit. More for you to hear it than anyone else.”

The honesty of his statement brought butterflies to her tummy. Harry had been in and out of meetings for the past few months getting together the release of his debut album and putting the final touches on it, but at no point had he let her hear it. She suspected it was because he was scared she’d hate it, but when she asked her dad about it, he told her to think about it as his journal. His journal of a past that Y/N hadn’t been a part of. That had made Y/N understand a bit better, the prospect of being nervous of what she’d think of him more the worry than a worry of what she’d think of the music. So she nuzzled her nose into his shoulder, careful not to get lipstick on the fabric, and told him, “I’m going to love it. It’ll be perfect, just like you.”

Harry’s arms wrapped backwards so he could hold her to him and they stood there, holding one another, basking in each other’s presence before everyone else arrived. It had been a busy couple months for them to start a relationship—Y/N was swamped at work, her boss having left so she had to take on extra work, and Harry was releasing his album, Dunkirk was coming out in the summer, and his tour started in the fall. It was a lot to say the least, and Y/N tried not to think about it too often because she’d get all in her head and ignore Harry’s texts for hours until he called her and asked her if she wanted gummy worms or Hershey’s for movie night. Then, she’d remind herself that they were doing good—really good, even. Better than other relationships that she had been in for this long. Usually this was when she got bored, but with Harry she kept falling for him more and more every day they spent with each other.

He was like a drug, and she was addicted.

“We should head down,” Y/N said, brushing back from him. “Wear the yellow ones, yeah?”

He mumbled something under his breath about her being bossy and coming for Lambert’s job and she snorted, leaving him in the walk-in closet to straighten himself out. Her phone in her hand, she slipped on her heels, a summer sandal with a platform so her feet didn’t hurt, the perfect compliment to her flowing sundress she’d selected for the release party. When Harry had seen it he’d promptly asked if she could take it off so he could ravish her, so she decided it was a good choice. It emphasized her curves in a way that made her feel confident and she’d pinned her hair over one shoulder, the earrings Harry had gotten her for their three-month anniversary on display.

Re-emerging, Harry rolled his eyes over her body and she gave him a soft smile at the way his eyes screamed with desire. “See something you like?”

“Fuck yes,” he cursed. “Can’t wait to have you all to myself later.” Hands in hers, he pressed a searing kiss to her lips, the kind that made her toes curl, before pulling back. “C’mon, Azoff is yelling at me over text about being late to my own party.”

“It’s literally downstairs,” she pointed out. “He’s just mad he can’t embarrass you in front of your friends.”

Harry laughed, arm tucked around her waist as they descended the stairs of his house. He’d bought it at the end of February, a birthday gift to himself, and Y/N had thought to herself at the time that it wasn’t about her, it was about him. But it was kind of hard whenever he had her help him pick out all the furniture, making sure she approved of the colors he painted the walls and the patio furniture.

Downstairs, the party was in full force. Harry hadn’t invited too many people, mostly the same crowd as his birthday. Since it was at his house, he was hesitant to give the address out to too many people, but ultimately he wanted to be able to do whatever the fuck he wanted to celebrate, no paps around. Also, it was hot and he had a pool, so he had told everyone to bring a swimsuit just in case they wanted to take a dip. Y/N had persuaded him to keep it simple and they’d ordered pizza from his favorite place and she made some a ton of margaritas for everyone to help themselves to. Jeff was left in charge of the door when Harry was late finishing getting dressed, and she could tell that he had done a fine job. The tunes were going, people were drinking, and everyone seemed happy. He had even put the album countdown that Y/N had spent two hours making that morning on the TV.

“Stay close to me, please?” Harry asked her, bending his head to whisper in her ear when they reached the group.

Y/N nodded, and Harry began happily talking to Jeff. Y/N started up a conversation with another one of the Full Stop employees who had come who she’d met at a brunch a few weeks ago, plucking some details from her brain about her boyfriend to check-in about. Then, a familiar face flashed in the crowd. “Hanna!”

Harry had suggested the idea of inviting her best friends to the party and Y/N had leapt at the idea. The prospect of having her two favorite people be there with her to celebrate her boyfriend was her idea of a perfect night. Hanna’s red hair popped up, her smile giddy from seeing Y/N. Cutting through the crowd, she quickly made it to Y/N, who wrapped her best friend up in a tight hug.

“I’m so happy you’re here,” she said. “Find it okay?”

Hanna nodded. “Security at the gate did not want to let me in though. Jamie is on his way—Cole called while he was walking out the door.” Jamie and Cole had been together for years and Y/N decided the first time she met Cole that there wasn’t anyone better for Jamie, and Jamie seemed to agree. “How are you?”

“Amazing,” Y/N replied and she truly was. She felt like she was on cloud nine right now, the energy bouncing off of Harry absorbing into every one of her pores. “Excited to finally hear it.”

“You should be.” Hanna leaned over and tapped Harry on the shoulder.

His attention shifted from some work-related conversation with Jeff quickly over to his girlfriend’s best friend. “Oh, hello Hanna,” he said, giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. “Thank you so much for coming.”

“No place I’d rather be,” Hanna replied. “Now can I steal Y/N?”

Harry’s eyes lingered on Y/N, but he gave her a warm smile. “‘Course.”

Y/N followed her best friend out onto the patio, giving hugs and saying hello to the friends of Harry’s she’d met during the past few months of them being together. Harry watched her with awe at how well she had fit into his life, she’d succeeded faster than any other girl he’d ever dated. The tidbits of information she remembered and the way she made an effort to be present in the conversations, her deep knowledge of music and the industry coming in handy. He loved having a girl at her side who knew what all of his team did without him having to explain it to her. It was small, but it made a difference to him.

“H,” Mitch said, pulling his gaze from his girlfriend back to the conversation he’d been having with Mitch, Adam, and Sarah. “You good?”

“Yeah,” he replied, taking a sip of the margaritas Y/N had made for the party. She’d slaved over them all day while he was on calls and doing interviews and he appreciated it so much. He reminded himself to tell her later when he had her alone and could tell her properly.

Sarah smiled at him knowingly. “He’s just looking at Y/N, as usual.”

Mitch and Adam chuckled, but Harry frowned. “Am I not allowed to look at my girl?”

“You are,” Adam said, “just be careful, mate. You told us about the rule, remember?”

The Rule. The goddamn rule that controlled this relationship more than he felt like he did, sometimes. He didn’t know how much Y/N thought about it at this point in their relationship, but then again it was still technically pretty early in the grand scheme of things. But for him, it was a constant reminder than their time together was fleeting, that at any point she might want to leave him, his lifestyle too hard. And it’s not that he blamed her. He just hated that it was a possibility. “I know.”

“How’s it going?” Adam pressed. Harry had been distant these past few weeks, holing himself up in the house with Y/N every chance he got when they weren’t rehearsing and he wasn’t on a call. It was hectic and he knew that his friends worried about him.

Harry took another sip of his margarita, eyes finding Y/N out on the patio laughing with Hanna, hair blowing in the wind. “Been good. She seems really happy,” he continued at the sight of her smile. “Bit nervous about tonight, if I’m being honest though.” He’d told Y/N the same thing, but the pit in his stomach still lingered. She had said she was excited, but he didn’t know how she would react to him releasing an album full of songs about his exes and flings.

They all got it though. “About which song?”

“All of ‘em,” he said nervously, and it was true. Y/N came into his life after the album was done, the idea of adding a song about her impossible. Even though he could’ve written dozens—he already had, the voice memos on his phone to prove it. Sometimes he’d sneak away to the bathroom while she slept to sing something that popped into his head, and the few that he’d shown the band they liked. It was all material for the next album, they told him. Some of them had even become full-fledged songs after a few hours locked in his office, but he hadn’t shared them yet. They still felt too raw.

Sarah reached out a hand and squeezed Harry’s shoulder. “She’ll get it, H. Her dad’s a musician, you know? If there was anyone who would understand, it would be her.”

And she was probably right. But there was a feeling in his gut that Harry couldn’t shake—that tonight wouldn’t end well for them. He’d felt it when he had woken up this morning and no matter how many time he kissed Y/N to make it go away, it lingered and it was making his brain go wild.

He hoped it was just the nerves.

The night passed quickly. There were speeches, a cake, Jeff pulled out a bottle of champagne, and Y/N had rejoined Harry at his side for the most part. And at this party, there was no question as to who she was—to everyone she was “Y/N, my girlfriend,” and Harry loved it. Particularly the look on her face that she would get every once in a while when her eyes caught his. He didn’t know what to call it, but he just knew that he felt the same way.

Before he knew it, it was 11:59 and everyone had gathered in the living room. The TV had the countdown on that Y/N had designed, the album cover with the numerical countdown over it, another bottle of champagne in Harry’s hand, ready to pop. Y/N stood a few people away from him, watching him with that look in her eyes that she’d been giving him all night that made him weak in the knees and made him curious what she would do to him when they were upstairs. He knew why Y/N was keeping her distance right now—she had mentioned it once before when they were curled up in bed after Harry asked her to be put down as a co-host for the party, that this success was his and his alone. That she was here at the end and she wanted it to be all his. She was here to support him and give him kisses after, but it was all his.

“10, 9, 8.” This was it. It was Harry’s debut album, his first solo record. It was weird for the rest of the guys to not be here when an album dropped. Usually, they were all standing together with bottles of champagne, ready to celebrate with one another.

“7, 6, 5, 4.” And Harry didn’t know which one was worse and which was better. Maybe they were both equally as wonderful, because he had other friends here to stand by his side. Jeff, Sarah, Mitch, Adam. James, floating around somewhere. His mum and sister tried to be here but Gemma got sick and Anna wanted to stay behind to take care of her.

“3, 2,” He had Y/N. He had Y/N’s excited expression, her wide eyes and flushed cheeks, the look of pride on her face that he treasured.

“1!” But this was his, his success, his win. With the first notes of the album playing in the room, he popped the bottle of champagne and with the bubbles running down the side of the bottle, he took a long swig.

Cheers went up around him, his best friends celebrating his biggest success of his career thus far, one he’d fought long and hard for. One he was immensely proud of and he hoped he would always look back on fondly. And the sound of his album blaring in his house’s sound system—the sound of Meet Me in the Hallway, it brought him to tears.

“Aww, man,” Adam brought him into a hug, patting Harry softly on his back. “Y/N! Come here!”

Y/N was there in an instant, wrapping Harry up in her arms, his head falling onto her shoulder, sobs wracking his body as they stood there. He didn’t even care that his friends were all there witnessing him crying into his girlfriend’s shoulder, he was just so overwhelmed.

“You okay, bubs?” Y/N asked, petting the back of his head softly.

“It’s a lot,” he replied softly, trying to find the words. “Happy. But also just…”

Her hands ran up and down his back, rubbing circles. “I know, baby. You don’t need to explain, okay?”

Harry didn’t reply, just tried to find his breath and stop the tears that were welling in his eyes. And when he did, he lifted his head and his lips met Y/N’s, the sound of whoops and cat-calls breaking out around them. The middle finger that Harry raised to them all did nothing to stifle them either. “Thank you,” he said into her hair when they broke.

The feeling of her lips on his neck, a soft kiss, brought him to his knees. “Always.”

And Harry hoped it was true.

While the rest of the party swirled around her—dancing had broke out, James had started making themed drinks, his favorite being the Sign of the Times one—Y/N sat right in front of the speaker, listening to every word of the album. It was her first time hearing it and she knew Harry would probably play it for her later, but she wanted to hear it now. She wanted to hear his pride and joy, the thing that had him beaming and laughing with his friends, belting out the lyrics with Mitch and Adam in a conga line that was worming its way through the room.

And what she heard broke her heart in so many ways.

Y/N knew that music, and much of art, stemmed from pain and hurt. A good amount of it was also about love, but the songs that were some of the rawest, the ones that hit home for most people, were the ones about our darkest moments. Harry’s album was full of them. Heartbreak, heartache, regrets, addiction to people and things. It was chock full of every one of his deepest darkest secrets, especially the women who he had loved before he met her. There was a part of her that knew that he would tell her in his own time about the stories of some of these women—he had mentioned a few when she’d asked about them—and that she didn’t need to push, but there was this disgusting, self-sabotaging part of her that wanted to know every sordid detail, even though she knew it would hurt her.

This was one of the many reasons she had always told herself she would never date a musician, but more importantly that she would never fall for one. Because their relationship, their joys and pitfalls, heartache and brightest moments, it was all fodder for a song, an album, a career. It wasn’t the artist’s fault, that’s how it worked, but that didn’t make it any easier to be the person they were writing about.

Was that all she was? Another girl for Harry to write a song about?

She wanted to be happy for him, to be glowing and beaming for him, but the part of her that she hated, the part that conjured the worst possible parts of people, it was crawling out of her head. It was twisting Harry and she knew it, but that didn’t mean she didn’t believe it.

The album only lasted 40 minutes, but in those 40 minutes the party died down. People had jumped in the pool while Y/N sat by the speaker, they had finished their drinks, they had said their goodbyes, the object of the event passed. Hanna and Jamie came over and gave her hugs, concerned looks on their faces, and told her to call them if she needed anything. When she looked up, the last notes of From the Dining Table fading, it was just her left.

A light from the patio twinkled and she could see the water rippling under the moonlight. Harry.

She left the stereo silent, not cuing up another playlist, and tugged off her shoes, then her dress. Following the pull of the man who had written such a beautiful, heartbreaking, hopeful record, she walked to the patio.

“There you are.” He was floating on his back in just his boxers, which didn’t surprise Y/N in the slightest. The fairy lights they had strung up together were dim in the nighttime darkness, but just bright enough so she could see Harry and all his beauty. “Look bloody gorgeous, love.”

Y/N tucked her hair into a loose bun at the nape of her neck, knotting the hair so it stayed. “Finished the album,” she said, walking to the water’s edge.

“Yeah?” Harry swam over to her, leaning his head on her thighs that rested on the concrete that lined the pool. “What’d you think?”

She couldn’t help the heartbroken smile that graced her features, because she was too tired to lie to him. Exhausted from trying to pretend that she didn’t think about the fact that he could leave her at any moment, that the insecurities of who she was and who he was didn’t catch up to her sometimes. His fingertips brushed at her cheeks and Y/N realized she was crying.

“Y/N? What’s wrong?” He hoisted himself out of the water and hooked one of his legs around her waist, pulling her into his wet skin. It was cold against the night air, but somehow Harry was still warm to her.

“I don’t know how to say this,” she said slowly, struggling to find her words.

Fingers drifted up and down her back. “Just do your best.”

She tried not to think about the fact that she was crying on his album release day, that they were having this conversation now. One that sat in the back of her mind when she was alone and Harry couldn’t banish it. “The album is beautiful, Harry,” she started, “but it’s about a past that I wasn’t a part of.” Harry was quiet, but his arms didn’t move from their place around her, so she forged on. “I know that artists write from their experience, and that this album was done before I met you, but there’s this part of me, this horrible part that I utterly despise, that is jealous of them. The women who you wrote about. And the fact that it’s them that you’re going to sing about on stage every night. Does that make sense?”

The brush of his chin against her spine showed her that yes, he understood.

“And,” she continued, voice breaking, “I can’t stop thinking about the fact that maybe I’m going to be a song.”

“Of course you’re going to be a song,” Harry said, his voice soft and sweet.

He didn’t get it. To him, being a song was an honor, but to her, it was a threat almost. “No—it’s that I’m going to be only a song.”

The man next to her didn’t say a word. The chirp of the crickets stretched between their bodies, which were still close on the concrete floor, not a muscle moved.

“I don’t want to only be a song.” Y/N’s voice was hoarse, sobs wracking her body she didn’t expect, didn’t want. She couldn’t have this conversation if she was crying, but she couldn’t hold them in either. It was her biggest fear, the one that festered below all of the others, threatening to consume the relationship she had with a man she was falling for. And falling was the only way to describe it—without any support, a free fall that was utterly terrifying but also blissful peaceful.

Suddenly, his fingers swept across her neck, brushing against her sensitive skin. “Y/N,” he whispered, “you could never be just a song. You’re—you’re like the stars and the moon to me. In that room I could always feel you, wherever you were, and I didn’t want to be anywhere where you weren’t. And maybe this is too fast and too soon, but what I feel for you, fuck Y/N how can you not see how much you are to me?”

He pulled her head so she faced him, his eyes teary to match her own. “Do you hear me? You’re so much more than a song. You’re an album. You’re my life’s work, my masterpiece, a symphony. A song can’t contain how I feel for you, it’s just a piece of a billion I could write.”

Soft as a feather, his lips pressed to her cheeks and then up and across her forehead, over her eyelids, barely leaving a mark but a searing fire in his wake that shook Y/N’s core. “And Y/N, you’re better than a song. You’re my life. You’re here, you’re real, you’re with me. Y/N, you will never be just a song to me. You never could be. Not to me.”

Y/N rested her forehead against his, inhaling his cologne and exhaling her feelings for him. He managed to rip down all her defenses, the ones she had spent years building up, and it was frightening. But then she looked at him, the way he smiled at her, the way he kissed her, the way he said her name, and it wasn’t quite as scary. She hoped he could feel how much she cared for him in the way she kissed him, their tears blending into one as they scrambled for each other. Lips breaking and meeting, desperate for more and more and more. Her fingers gripped the back of his head, holding him to her, wanting to have his whole body imprinted on hers.

“Y/N,” he breathed, “you heard me? You understand?”

“Yes,” she replied softly, “I hear you.” She brushed her fingers through his hair gently, curling the wet strands back. “You may need to remind me sometimes.”

“Always,” he whispered, catching her kiss with his own, tugging her into him, arms around her body in a vice grip.

She lost herself in Harry, him an ocean and her a boat lost at sea. Maybe it was their conversation or the night or the alcohol flowing through their veins, but it felt different. The way he kissed her felt heavier, her moans a prayer, his fingers on his back a weight she never wanted lifted. Her legs wrapped around his waist so she was firmly in his lap, arms thrown over his shoulders, their bare bodies except for their underwear pressed against each other without a molecule of air between them.

His lips drew a line across the top of her shoulder, a fire building in her belly as his fingers fumbled with the clasp of her bra. It was a light pink she’d worn just for him and when he nudged at the strap with his nose, letting it slip from her shoulders, she didn’t care that he could barely see it. She’d show him tomorrow morning. He pulled the fabric away and bent his head, licking at one of her nipples and then the other, gasps falling from her mouth like poetry. Without meaning to, her hips rolled over his cock, the thin fabric of their underwear doing nothing to keep the heat of her center from touching his sensitive skin.

He moaned her name, the sound muffled against her neck as he sucked a love bite into the spot that made her keen every time he nipped into it. She rocked again on him, his fingers digging into her skin so hard it would leave marks tomorrow but she didn’t care. In fact, she wanted to have his marks on her tomorrow, she wanted to show the world that she wasn’t just a song, she was his, she was his girlfriend and she made him feel this way.

Hands on skin, he pressed her down onto the concrete so she was lying down, her ankles tucked around his hips, anchoring her to him. When his hips bucked into hers, she let out a sharp cry, the angle brushing her clit perfectly. “Right there?” He mumbled, nipping and tugging on her nipple, laving a circle that left her squirming against the concrete.

“Off,” she whispered, tugging at his boxers with her hands. “Wanna feel you.” With his help, they shimmied off his boxers without too much difficulty and Y/N let out a sigh of relief when she could feel his cock brush against her covered folds. Reaching a hand down, she brushed the pad of her thumb across his tip, a pained hiss flying from Harry’s throat. He was sensitive and Y/N loved it.

They didn’t have a condom, but she didn’t care. She’d been on birth control for years and she knew Harry hadn’t slept with anyone else since she found her way into his life. Plus, she needed him—she wanted to feel him, raw and bare inside of her.

They were going to have sex on the concrete next to his pool, but she didn’t care. They had had sex before and they would have sex again. She just needed him in a desperate, crawling way. When he nudged at her underwear she pressed into him, letting him pull them down her legs without a second thought.

“Condom,” Harry mumbled as she chased after his lips, open mouthed and heavy.

“It’s okay,” she said, fingers digging into his shoulder blades. “Want you like this.”

Harry’s head dropped to the space between her neck and shoulder, the groan that filled the air unlike anything she had heard before. “Gonna ruin me,” he whispered, brushing his cock against her folds. Y/N whimpered at the sensation, her fingers begging him for more, for anything she would give him. When his fingers brushed her clit, his name tumbled from her lips without abandon.

“Harry, please,” she panted, fingers deep in his hair.

That was all it took. She was so wet from the foreplay and just him that he didn’t even need to stretch her out. Her mouth fell open as he pushed inside, a mewl landing on his lips as he kissed her. Slowly, he pulled out and then back in, both of them groaning from the sensation of him being bare inside her. He felt impossibly close, every ridge and edge of him pressing against her in the most perfect way. She didn’t know if she could use condoms again, because holding Harry to her chest, arms around his shoulders as he fucked slowly, deeply, into her, her able to feel every inch of her, it was bliss on a new level. A sensation she didn’t know she was missing with him.

Her ankles hitched higher on his hips and when he pushed back in he hit a new angle, a groan ripping from his throat that set her on fire. “Can I go faster?” He said with a grunt. “I—I don’t know how much—“

“Yes,” she whimpered at his words.

He didn’t wait. He drew back and into her, pistoning his hips at a pace she couldn’t even describe, hitting that spot deep inside of her that made her eyes roll back over and over. How he managed to do that she didn’t know, but he deserved an award. Fingers grabbing at his skin in desperation for something to hold her together, Y/N gasped and exhaled his name, a plea and a beg and a prayer all in one. Her back hurt from the concrete but she didn’t care, she just wanted to finish, to feel him release deep inside of her.

Then he thumbed over her clit and she arched up, back leaving the concrete as the fire deep within her threatened to bubble over. When he start brushing circles there, Y/N gripped his shoulders like they would keep her anchored to Earth, her body possibly transcending. Harry bent his head and sucked a love bite on her breast, the puncture of skin forcing her head back, unable to keep it together.

“You close?” He asked, littering her chest with kisses, “Please tell me you are, I can’t, I can’t hold on…”

She mumbled a yes as he drove deep inside of her, swiveling his hips in a brutal way that left her hands squeezing his butt cheeks to get him to do it again. When he did, she swore she saw stars. “Gonna come,” she said, eyes searching for his lips in the low lighting. “Kiss?”

Without hesitation, he kissed her, open mouthed and dirty and sloppy and perfect. She wanted every rough-edged and sweet part of him, every kiss and press of his body against hers. “Y/N, Y/N, Y/N,” he chanted as he pressed into her again and again, her body drawing tighter and tighter. Then, he pinched her clit and she came, the ball in her tummy unravelling, hips bucking up against him as she rode out her high. Her eyes stayed trained on him as she did, not wanting to miss his face when he came inside of her.

His hips stuttered, release unloading inside of her in ropes that left him cursing like a sailor. Hair wet and sweaty, sticking to his forehead, and irises blown out, he looked beautiful. She held him close until his body settled, shaking as he came down from his high, forehead resting on the swell of her breasts.

Slowly, he rolled off of her, tugging her body into his so she wasn’t on the cold concrete anymore. He was fiery hot and it kept her warm in the cold air. “Can we never use a rubber again?” He asked softly, and she giggled, hiding her face in his neck.

“Don’t see any reason to,” she replied and he hummed with joy. Tucking her hands under her chin, she looked at him with a smile. “Congrats on your album, baby.”

He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear tenderly. “I’m so happy I shared today with you.” She kissed him softly and let him hold her close, not wanting to move even to go to bed because it meant leaving his grasp. And as much as her head told her that it wasn’t forever, she couldn’t help but hope it would be.

It had been four days since Harry had texted her. Five since he called her. Six since they FaceTimed.

He was in London for the press junket for Dunkirk and Y/N was supposed to fly out for the July 13th premiere—it was decided a month ago, the tickets booked and her time off from work already approved. But as the days stretched on and the silence grew longer, she couldn’t help but wonder if something was wrong. If she had done something wrong.

It wasn’t the first time he had been away from LA. They had a conversation about how they were going to handle distance when he travelled back in April, before the album came out and he had to fly around and do press for two weeks. That time, though, he handled it well—he called every night before she went to bed if he could, if not, he sent a long voice memo that she listened to when she woke up. They texted all day, him sending photos from dressing rooms and backstage at talk shows, even FaceTiming her so she could meet the stars he shared the nights with.

But this time was different. Since he left he had texted her just a handful of times and it was when he was at his mom’s house visiting home before press started. And then once press kicked into gear, he was gone, her texts ignored, calls not returned. She was trying not to seem desperate, but with the more time that passed the more anxious she got. It wasn’t how this was supposed to go, this wasn’t what they’d agreed on. He knew her fears, the dark thoughts that crowded in when she spent too much time worrying about their relationship, and yet he wasn’t taking the actions that helped her calm down. Even though she knew it wasn’t his responsibility to take care of her brain, it helped to know he thought about her, at the very least.

The morning before her flight was supposed to leave, she called Hanna in a panic. Her suitcases laid open on her bed, clothes scattered around her, tears streaming down her face. She had tried to call Harry again to confirm her arrival plans, only to be met with his voicemail, again.

Hi, you’ve reached Harry. I’ll give you a call back when I can!

Somehow, the sound of his voice made it worse.

“Han,” she choked out when her friend picked up, “I don’t know what to do.”

“Did he not answer?” Hanna had been counseling her through the whole thing, helping her stay calm and sane, as much as possible at least. From Y/N’s lack of response, just more sobs, Hanna knew immediately. “That prick.”

Y/N wiped a tear from her eye and looked at the ticket in her hand. Harry had forced her to accept his offer of first-class, booking her flight through his agent and everything. “Does he even want me there? Should I not go?”

Hanna was quiet, thoughts rolling through her head. “No,” she finally said. “You should go. Even if it’s just to talk to him in person. You deserve to hear it face-to-face, not by him ghosting you.”

“Even if that means I end up in London and he breaks up with me?”

“Yes,” Hanna replied softly. “But I really, really hope that is not what’s happening.”

At first it had been that he was busy, that he would text when he had time, but it had been six days. Now, both Y/N and Hanna were increasingly worried that it meant the end of their relationship and Y/N was simply not ready for that possibility. She had let Harry in—he had begged her to let him in—and he was going to end things like this? When things got hard with the distance he just…cut her out? “Can you take me to the airport?” Y/N asked, sniffling. “If you don’t I don’t think I’ll be able to force myself to go.”

“Was already planning on it,” Hanna replied. “I’ll bring snacks for the flight.”

“Love you,” Y/N told her. Hanna was her one constant, who knew Y/N better than she knew herself.

“Love you more. Now go finish packing and call me if you need me, okay?”

Y/N told her okay and hung up, her gaze shifting to her suitcase. If he was going to break up with her, then she was going to look so magnificent he would regret every second of it.

Eleven hours in the air meant plenty of time to run over her entire relationship with Harry. She had sat curled up in her seat scrolling through her camera roll and listening to Bon Iver, which was the sappiest thing possible and she didn’t care. Y/N didn’t want to break up with him and the photos and the texts and the memories proved it. Her time with Harry had been so beautifully bright, his presence in her life making so much better, from her confidence to her knowledge to her music taste. And she cared about him in a way she hadn’t let herself do—ever.

She had texted Jeff before she took off, telling him she couldn’t get a hold of Harry and asking where she should go when she landed. He replied with Harry’s Hampstead address and the door code, saying there was a key waiting for her, hidden in the garden, an apology on Harry’s behalf for how busy he had been. The words meant nothing, though, to Y/N. If Harry wanted to apologize he would have to do it in person, not through Jeff.

It was eleven by the time her Uber pulled up to Harry’s house and she thanked the driver as he tugged her luggage from the boot. She waited until he pulled away before she typed in the gate code, not wanting to reveal Harry’s security to anyone—she have been mad at him, but she still didn’t want anything happening to him. The door unlocked for her and she slid inside, shutting it quickly behind her. Pulling her suitcase behind her, she walked up the path, searching for the garden statue Jeff had told her the key was hiding under. When she found it, her fingers ran across the ridges as she made her way to the front door.

His house in LA was warm, it was the Harry she knew. But this house felt colder, the design modern, his personal affects not as visible. Although to his credit, he hadn’t been here for more than a few days in months. A few photos of Anne and Gemma were scattered through the front hall, some framed photos of his time in One Direction nestled between them.

“Harry?” She knew he wasn’t there, but the idea of walking into his house without checking felt too uncomfortable for her. She locked the door tightly behind her, typing in the security code Jeff had sent before re-arming it.

Y/N took her time exploring his house. She perused the main spaces, testing out the couches and peeking at his bookcases, studying the art lining the walls. Then she made her way upstairs to the bedrooms, running her fingers along the edges of his One Direction album plaques that lined the walls of his office, the ones from his debut still resting on the floor waiting to be hung. She found the guest bedrooms with ease and she spent a good five minutes standing on the landing deciding if she should go into his bedroom or set herself up in a guest one.

She settled on a guest bedroom. If he was going to break things off, she didn’t want to know what his bed felt like or smell his clothes or take a shower in his bathroom.

Instead, she showered in the guest bath, washing off the plane smell that lingered on her body. She dressed in shorts and a tank top, letting her hair air dry since she would have to just re-style it for the premiere later. Jeff hadn’t told her what time Harry would be back and she was ravenous, so she wandered downstairs to fix herself some lunch. To fill the silence in the house she turned on The 1975, playing the music from her laptop she had open on the counter as she cooked some pasta she had found in the cabinet. As she ate at his dining table, she tried not to think about the fact that this could be the last time she was in a space of Harry’s. The last time she sat on things he had picked out, the last time she rooted through his fridge, past his obnoxious green juices and leftovers since he hated eating out if he didn’t have to. Her fingers brushed at her eyes, trying to stop the tears that threatened to fall down her cheeks.

Reaching down for her fork to take another bite, she suddenly heard the lock click in the front door and the security system begin to beep.

He was home.

She slid her bowl away from her and turned to look at the doorway, waiting to see his face for the first time in over a week. And when he appeared, she couldn’t the return the stretched across his face at the sight of her in his house. He looked the same and somehow that was worse. In a nice shirt from interviews this morning, his hair slightly tossed from running his fingers through it, the sheen on his upper lip from the heat outside. He looked like her Harry, but she didn’t know if he was hers anymore.

“Y/N!” His voice rebounded off the walls, filling her heart with a kind of hope that was crushing.

“Hi,” was all she could muster before looking back down at her pasta. An anger rose in her, replacing the hurt that had lingered for so many days. How could he pretend like everything was okay? How could he smile at her like he hadn’t been ignoring her for days, too busy to even check and see how her flight was?

His footsteps were heavy on the hardwood floors as he made his way over to her. “Baby? What is it?”

“Do you want to break up?” She asked, her question hard compared to his kind, gentle, tentative tone.

“What?” Harry dropped into the seat caddy-corner to the chair she sat in. “What are you talking about?”

She pushed away her bowl and looked him dead in the eye. “I haven’t heard from you in days, Harry. Days. I flew halfway across the world for you and you couldn’t even manage to check-in to see if I was alive?”

He flinched at her words, eyes dropping to the table they sat at. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, words barely audible above her heart beating a mile a minute, pulsing with anger.

“That’s not going to cut it,” she told him, standing up and taking her bowl to the sink. “You fucking ghosted me like I was a girl you’d just met. We’re about to celebrate six months together. And you know what this shit does to me.”

And he did. She could see in his eyes that he knew he was in the wrong, and yet he was quiet. “I was busy.”

“So was I! But I still found two seconds to text you asking how it was going, I found fifteen minutes before bed to call you, and I kept trying even though you couldn’t even manage to reply to me. You’re not that busy, Harry.”

He stood too, walking over to where she stood in his kitchen so that he was a few paces away from her. “I was in and out of interviews from morning to night and when I wasn’t, I was with the cast who I haven’t seen in almost a year. And when I wasn’t doing that Jeff was harassing me about tour details or I was sleeping. I’m sorry if my schedule didn’t allow me to talk to you at every second of the day, Y/N, but this is a huge moment for me and I had to focus on that.” His words were measured, but she could feel the tension rising between them, words unsaid bubbling over.

“And your career is more important than our relationship.” She nodded sarcastically, wiping her wet palms on the dish towel and turning to face him. “Got it, heard loud and clear.”

“Fuck—you know it’s not!” His hand ran through his locks and down his face, struggling to get a handle on his breathing.

“Harry,” she said, trying not to yell, “I’m not going to force you to stay in a relationship that you don’t want to put the time in for. But you know exactly what I need from you—I have been very clear. You know my fears and my insecurities, and you know what triggers them. We had a plan for how to deal with this, and you completely disregarded it!” Her voice rose at the end, the fact that he couldn’t even meet her eyes pushing all of her buttons. “Fucking look at me when I talk to you!”

His eyes met hers and she didn’t see the Harry she knew, the Harry who cared for her, the soft, gentle man. Instead, she saw someone who was pissed off and hurt and grasping at straws. “I can’t dance around your fears every moment of the day,” he said, voice spitting anger. “And I’m sorry if that breaks one of your rules,” the word hitting her in the face, “but you’re going to have to get over it because I can’t spend every second of the day wondering if something I did or said has made you think I don’t care about you! You should know that I don’t want to hurt you, that of course I want to be with you!”

“Well, how am I supposed to know if you don’t tell me!” His words stabbed her right where it hurt, hitting her fears right in the heart.

Harry turned, his body facing the counter, fingers gripping the edge of the marble. He sucked in breath after breath trying to calm himself down and Y/N tried to find it within herself to have sympathy for him, but she just…couldn’t. She was so pissed off at him she couldn’t think straight.

“I’m not some girl waiting around for Harry Styles to come home, begging him to never leave me,” Y/N said. She was done. She was done with this fight, with him expecting her to be someone she wasn’t. “I’m me and I’m waiting for Harry, the person I care for so deeply it hurts—you are held to the same standards as every other guy, no matter how busy your schedule is. I should not be expected to fit into your schedule all the time. It goes both ways and you operated this week as if it was entirely my job to stay in touch with you. And I am not going to stay in a relationship like that.”

Harry’s head whipped to hers, eyes boring straight into her. “Are you saying you want to break up?”

Y/N tried to keep her head high, tried to hold back the tears. “If you’re going to do this when you’re on tour, I’m done. You know what I want—it’s the same thing I wanted from this relationship the moment I met you. You’re the only one who seems to think things have changed.” And with that, she stormed out of the room, which was probably petty but she didn’t care. She was so mad at him for his actions and his words that she couldn’t stand to be in the same room as him.

Harry didn’t follow her.

At 1 o’clock, a knock came on her door.

“If you still want to come, we have to leave for the premiere in an hour. It’s up to you.” And with that, he walked away, not even waiting for her to open the door.

She sat on the bed, considering her options. Did she go and support him anyway, pretend everything was fine? Or did she stay here—or maybe find a hotel—and leave him alone for the premiere?

He had told her how nervous he was about this. This was his first time on a movie red carpet as an actor and he was freaking out about it before he left, a ball of anxiety that she had to carefully untangle. The thought of him being up there alone pained her, despite how his hurtful words lingered in her head. That she had to get over it as if it was that simple.

The red dress she had bought for the premiere hung in the bathroom where she had left it while she showered so the wrinkles would leave the fabric. It was beautiful—a tiered taffeta skirt that cinched in at the waist, a caged bodice showing off her shoulders. When she had tried it on she had felt beautiful, powerful, as if she could take on anything and everything. She had spent a ton of money on the dress and she didn’t want to waste it.

So she got up, turning on BANKS and set about her hair and makeup in the bathroom, praising Hanna for teaching her how to do her makeup in college. She painted her lips red, in the shade that she adored wearing, and twisted up her hair into a chignon that emphasized her neck. Running her fingers along the skin she remembered when Harry had kissed it, but the love bite he had left behind was long healed. Was she asking too much of him? She wondered as she looked at herself in the mirror. Was he right, were her fears stifling him?

Then she remembered what Hanna had told her. That he wasn’t anyone different from other guys she had dated, and what she was asking from him wasn’t out of left field. Any guy she would date she would except to check in with her when he was traveling and Harry was no different, no matter what his job was.

Harry was waiting downstairs for her, probably having heard her rummaging around in the closet. When he heard her heels on the stairs, he looked up and his eyesight on her skin burned because he looked gorgeous. Maybe this was a horrible idea, she thought as she made her way towards him. She would have to touch him all night, look at him in his tailored suit, gaze into his green eyes as they were photographed on the red carpet.

“You look beautiful,” he said, words gravelly in his throat.

She stopped a few paces away from him. “Thanks.”

He fiddled with his keys, the silence stretching between them. “Thank you for coming with me. I know you have no reason to, but having you there…It means a lot.”

Instead of replying, because she didn’t have words for him, she just nodded. Because she did have a reason—even though she was mad at him, she still cared for him. Despite not wanting to, she still craved him giving her a kiss on the cheek as they walked out the door.

The drive to the red carpet was quiet, the radio playing softly in the background the only sound. They sat on either side of the backseat, Y/N staring out the window while Harry fiddled with his phone. She hadn’t been to London since she was 18 for her graduation present from her mom, and the city held warm memories for her. She wondered if that would change after today.

When they pulled up, an anxiety Y/N didn’t know she was holding started building, the sight of the photographers and the screams from the fans barricaded in. With all that had been happening, she had somehow forgotten what going to the premiere meant for her. Her eyes fell to Harry who was staring at her, trying to gauge her reaction. She had never done this before and he knew that.

“I’ll be with you the whole time,” he said, trying to calm her fears. “Promise.” It helped. At least she wouldn’t be completely alone. “Ready?” He stretched out a hand to her and she took it, letting him help her from the car.

The second her feet hit the pavement, the screams got louder. Fans with signs and their phones outstretched on either side of the wide red carpet, the word DUNKIRK in large white letters closest to the entrance to the theater. Harry’s hand gripped her as she stood, thankful for his body to help her keep balanced.

“Just smile as best you can,” he whispered in her ear as the car pulled away behind them. “And if your eyes start hurting from the flashes, just look at me, okay?”

Y/N nodded, and with his hand in hers, fingers entertained, they made their way down the carpet. He stopped a few times to take photos with fans and sign cards, but all that time he never strayed too far from Y/N’s side. With his arm securely wrapped around her waist, they stood for photos, Y/N trying to stand up as straight as she could and smile sweetly. Harry was a pro at this, a smile practiced for years, but she didn’t have the same experience. She was just a regular person who didn’t know which side was her bad side and had her eyes closed in half her photos.

The cameramen screamed questions at them, about their relationship, if they were married. They’d never quite publicly announced their relationship, Harry preferring to keep his private life private, so this was the first time they’d ever even publicly been out as a couple. And for it to be like this…Y/N hated it. She wanted to stand there and be utterly infatuated with Harry like she usually was, but this time her spine was rimrod straight, trying to keep her emotions in check. It was awkward, the way he tentatively touched her body, not wanting to overstep but also wanting to present the aura of normalcy.

Then they took a few steps and rotated to another set of cameras and Y/N understood what Harry had meant about her eyes hurting from the flashes. She turned her head to him and he found her eyes, giving her a wide smile meant just for her. Without thinking about it, her hand pressed to his suit right over his heart, the soft material of his suit jacket butter under her fingers. Then, he leaned in and pressed a kiss to her cheek, softly and sweetly and to most it wouldn’t have meant much. But to Y/N, it was the first time he had kissed her since she’d seen him. And the feeling of his lips on her skin lingered, a tingle moving through her body. Her hand gripped his back a little tighter and he just kept smiling at her, utterly entranced by her eyes.

Their bodies had betrayed them. To anyone who looked, they would have seen perfectly fine, not that they had been fighting only two hours ago. But they knew the reality, and this moment, their bodies close together and emotions running through them without being able to stop it, it made it clear that neither of them wanted to break up. They would just have to find a way to move through it.

TAGLIST

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NEXT CHAPTER COMING JULY 11TH @ NOON CST

#Harry Styles Fan Fiction #harry styles fic #harry styles one shot #harry styles drabble #harry styles writing #harry styles smut #harry styles x reader #harry styles x you

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fenharel-archived · 4 years ago

Text

— OTP MEME

tagged by @arlathen, thank u carly!!!! 💜

tagging everyone who wants to do this!!! (pls @ me so I’ll see it, xoxo)

— Cari Amell & Zevran Arainai { Dragon Age: Origins }

— Nymeria Tabris & Alistair Theirin { Dragon Age: Origins }

— Eleanor Hawke & Anders { Dragon Age 2 }

— Falon Lavellan & Dorian Pavus { Dragon Age: Inquisition }

#ive done this particular meme so many times & the only DA ship i've ever filled it out for was alvar/solas; c'mon @ me #so here we go!!#cari x zevran #eleanor x anders #falon x dorian #nymeria x alistair #ocs tag #me bolding grow old together everywhere: bioware u agree with me right 🤡

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busybby · 5 years ago

Note

Hey I’m gonna start at community college, would u have any tips for starting college in general? I come from being homeschooled in high school

hello! i’m gonna be real w you so some of these may be commonly said and others not so much but they’re truly just what i’ve discovered in my experience! also every school/person is different so ultimately the biggest thing is being open and willing to try things and then looking inside yourself to see if it’s truly serving you! if you can do that everything else will fall into place. other things tho!

eat what you want but be conscious of it! i’m not trying to say go vegan or only eat junk food, just notice how your body feels in response to food! i don’t think we realize how significantly what we eat impacts us. until about 2 months ago i’d been having horrible stomach aches for 2 ish years. this semester i cut out all dairy to see if that would help except for cheese (it’s my fav food and the pain is worth it for me lol) and i have only had 3 major stomach aches since! what you eat really impacts your energy so be willing to eat what makes you feel good but don’t be afraid to be flexible and still eat what u love! (drinking water goes w this!)

listen to music, podcasts, watch movies and tv! for a long time i didn’t think i had time for these while at the same time i was feeling so lonely. they can be great ways to feel less alone and let your mind rest.

have some go to outfits for different occasions (exams, spending a day in the library, etc.)

read for fun! i know it’s hard since you probably have tons of school reading anyways, but it has really become an amazing act of self care for me and i’ve read more books for my self this year than i have since middle school! audiobooks are great too and you can access them and ebooks for free using the app overdrive if u connect it to ur library

it’s never too late to try new things. i spent a lot of last year just adjusting to college life and now i’m finally ready to find my community. this semester i’ve joined 2 new clubs and 1 academic ish program

that being said, finding community is important imo but don’t rush it. it may take a while but that’s okay!

take classes that genuinely interest and excite you! this is the best way to stay engaged in courses and will help you stay up to date with your coursework. also pick your major this way (imo).

breaks from school work and from people are so important

keep an eye out for mentors!

just talk to people! there have been a few people this semester who i’ve wanted to befriend but i felt awkward because it didn’t feel as easy. during orientation/your first sem everyone is clearly looking and open to finding friends but as your time in school goes on it feels less and less like that. my roommate told me this isn’t the case tho and she’s so right! no one gets 7 friends and says okay i’ve reached the quota! no more friends for me! people are always looking for more friends. (compliments and questions are a good way to go about this)

college can be so lonely bc for a lot of people it’s their first time being really independent and far from their regular support system (it was for me). instead of seeing this as a negative, try to reframe it positively. this is an opportunity to learn what you like in classes, in a roommate/living space, in friends, in your spare time. you are not here for anyone else, you’re here for you!

i know it’s not always easy at all, esp due to mental health stuff, but even trying to reframe things in a positive way can be so helpful. i went thru a rough patch at the beginning of this semester, one of the symptoms being that i had zero motivation. slowly i’ve been working to get myself out of this state, and one thing i’ve been doing is repeating mantras/affirmations about how i love and value learning (which i truly do) and just reminding myself how much i used to love learning.

having less stuff can be nice bc the clutter won’t weigh on your mind, especially if you’re already living in a small space

self care is a lot more than just a face mask and it does not have to cost money. it may mean deciding to go to therapy, schedule a doctors appointment, set a boundary, go on a walk, cook yourself dinner, open up to a friend, etc.

journaling in particular has been so important for me. i love reflecting and being able to look back on things. it’s a great way to get everything off your mind in a positive, constructive way and learn about yourself and the world/people around you!

pls let me know if you have any more questions or wanna talk about literally anything!! i love connecting with people 💖 i hope this resonates w you in some way!! xoxo annie

#studyblr #studyspo #answered #annie talks #college advice #collegeblr

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wweimagineandedit · 7 years ago

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Locked In - Shane McMahon x Reader

Summary:- You’re Shane’s assistant and you’ve had feelings for him for a long time. Shane hears you talking to a friend about how you feel about him, and once you two are stuck in a room together, you’re forced to speak to Shane about what happened - and things escalate from there.

Warnings:- Smut, Swearing

Word Count:-1,773

Requested By Anon

A/N - Well guys, after far too long - I’m finally back.

@fangasm202 @blondekel77

Let’s be real. Being the assistant of Shane McMahon was not the easiest job in the world to say the least. Constant running around trying to get everything done for a set time, always having to be on my toes in case something unexpected was to arise. Most people would hate the job I’ve got – but I couldn’t be any happier. I like to be kept busy all the time, the pay is good, and Shane is, well, rather dreamy.

I think the time I realised I had feelings for him was when he went on holiday to The Caribbean and insisted that I come with him. “There’s still gonna be business to take care of when I’m away, (Y/N). I’ll need you there, just in case” were the exact words he said to me. I remember them as if they were yesterday, playing them over and over in my head, trying to stop convincing myself that he wanted me to come away with him because he had feelings for me. Stopping myself from thinking that our relationship is anything but business.

I’m snapped out of my thoughts when I feel a buzz in the right pocket of my tight fit black trousers.

Pulling my phone out of my pocket, my phone screen lights up to a text from Shane.

“Pick me up a bottle of water from catering pls (Y/N). Dehydrating here lol. C u in 5 x.”

Grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, I text him back. “No probs. Be there in 3 ;) x”

After pressing send, I immediately regret sending the winking face. Was that too flirty? He is my boss at the end of the day. Shaking my head, I head towards the meeting room to meet with Shane and the creative team.

After the meeting with the creative team, I glance at my phone and see text from Carmella.

“Hey (Y/N)! Haven’t seen you for so long. I mean, I’ve seen you with Shane, how’s that going by the way girl? ;) Come down to the locker room and tell me everything! Xox” I smile and roll my eyes before turning to see Shane heading towards me.

“Successful meeting, don’t you think?” He says, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and giving me a tight squeeze. No matter how many times he did that, it always gave me goosebumps.

“Aren’t they always when you’re the one leading them?” I shoot back playfully.

“Well I’m not one to blow my own trumpet but…” He laughs.

Laughing back at him, I say “Am I alright to go see some of the girls for a bit? You don’t need me do you? Cause I’ve got nothing on my schedule for some time and-“

Shane cuts me off mid sentence. “Of course you can. I’m your boss and your friend, not your probation officer.”

“Haha yeah of course. Well, you know my number if you need me.”

With that, I head towards the locker room to see Carmella, ignoring how much Shane using the word ‘friend’ stung.

Sitting on some crates near Gorilla with Carmella, I fill her in on everything happening regarding my feelings for Shane.

“So do you really think it’s strictly professional between you guys? I mean so may of us girls see the way he looks at you, it looks like so much more than a employee/employer thing?” Carmella says.

“I wish it was more than that. Literally all that he has to do is let his knee touch mine in a meeting and my heart melts. I wish I wasn’t so afraid of telling him you know? Everything else is so easy to talk to him about, but this is just something I’m so afraid of. He’s one of the most wonderful, kind, caring and loving men I’ve ever met. It’s so cringey how much I like Shane. I wish I didn’t but I do.”

Carmella makes no facial expression, she just points behind me. My heart drops, and I already know what it is. As usual, I’ve lost track of time speaking to Mella, and Shane’s opening Smackdown tonight. I turn around and see Shane looking at me.

“I-I have to go!” I stammer before running off down the corridor. I hear Shane calling after me, but I hear his music hit, so I know he can’t follow me.

I spend the entirety of Smackdown hiding from Shane. Finding a safe hiding spot in an empty meeting room, I sit down on the couch in the corner, clutching my phone in my shaking hands. My phone blows up with texts from Carmella and Shane.

“(Y/N) Where are you? I’m worried! Call me. Love C xoxo”

“(Y/N) Please answer me x” “Where are you? We gotta talk about this x” “Pls tell me where you are (Y/N). I’m worried about u xx” All from Shane.

Tossing my phone to the couch beside me, I curl up on the couch as I feel the pit in my stomach grow and grow. Laying down, I turn over to face the back of the couch. Shutting my eyes, I try to block out all the events of the last hour.

All of a sudden, I feel a hand gently shaking my shoulder. Turning over, I look up and see Shane looking down at me. Quickly I sit up, moving to the other side of the couch. I pick up my phone, 11:30pm, realising I must of fell asleep.

I stand up and head towards the door. “(Y/N) please stop. I’ve been worried about you and looking for you for hours. We need to talk about this.” Shane says earnestly.

“Look I just want to go back to the hotel, I don’t want to talk about this Shane.” I retort, grabbing the door handle and pushing it, but the door jams. I try again, the door jams again.

“The doors stuck.” I sigh.

“What? Let me try” Shane says pacing towards me.

Dropping my hands to my sides, I move to the wall on the opposite side of the room as Shane tries to open the door with no success.

“The doors stuck” Shane says flatly.

“Tell me something I don’t know”

“Okay. I feel the same about you.”

Shocked, I turn my body towards Shane. “Don’t joke about that, Shane.”

“(Y/N) I’m not joking. For so long I’ve wanted to tell you but I thought you’d think it was weird, having your boss hit on you. You get me, (Y/N). You go out of you way to help me get things done, you’re always there to talk to, you’re kind, funny, sexy as hell.”

I can’ t help but smile as he throws compliment after compliment at me. “And honestly, (Y/N),” he walks slowly towards me, trapping me between his body in the world, his face so close to mine I can feel his breath on my face “I think about you every second of every day”.

He places his hand on my cheek, planting a soft kiss on lips, taking me by surprise. However, I react in no time, putting my arms around his neck as he wraps his around my waist.

The kisses quickly become more passionate and wanting, his tongue sliding into my mouth, his hands wandering from my waist to my ass. I pull his shirt over his head, and he grabs either side of my shirt, ripping the buttons open and kissing from my collarbones down my torso, causing the hairs on the back of my neck to prick up.

He moves back up my body, kissing my neck as he lifts me up. I wrap my legs around him, feeling his rock hard dick pushing against the fabric of his pants. He gently puts me down on the couch, kissing just above my waistband as he undoes the button of my trousers.

He pulls off my trousers, tossing them to the side and drinking in the sight of me in my matching black underwear set. He runs his hands down my body,

“I’ve imagined what you look like under those clothes a million times, but nothing I’ve imagined will ever compare to how fucking hot you are In real life.” He rasps.

I sit up, mimicking his actions, kissing above his waistband and unbuttoning his trousers, pulling both his trousers and boxers down at once, letting his huge member spring free. I lick the length of his dick, flicking my tongue over the tip, making him bite his lip and shudder.

“Mr McMahon, I could say the exact same for you” I smirk, lightly kissing his tip once more before lying back down, him following me down so his body is pressed against mine.

He kisses me softly on the lips as he pushes my soaked panties to the side, as I feel a trickle of my wetness run down my pussy. He rubs his dick against my slit, enjoying teasing me.

“Jesus please just fuck me”

Shane nips at my neck before responding by slowly pushing himself inside of me, stretching my pussy as it adjusted to his length.

“Fuck!” I moan as he starts to pick up a pace, pushing himself in and out of me.

“Shit you feel amazing (Y/N)” Shane rasps as he pushes himself deeper inside of me, causing my legs to shudder as I claw down his back when his pace increases even more.

He reaches his arm down between us and starts to play with my clit, making me lose my breath even faster than before. I feel a familiar sensation pooling in my abdomen, “Fuck Shane I’m gonna cum don’t stop!” I whisper hoarsely into his ear.

He pushes himself deep inside me once again, and I feel my walls contract as I cum all over Shane’s huge dick. Shane follows seconds after, “Fuck (Y/N) I-I” he stammered as he emptied his load inside of me.

Shane kisses my forehead and smiles down at me, stroking my hair back. “I’m afraid I’m gonna wake up and this was all a dream.” He chuckles.

Gently placing my hand on his neck, I pull myself up to place a kiss on his lips. “Trust me, this is real.” I smile up at him.

We dress just in time to have someone bust the door open.

“Mr McMahon, Miss (Y/N), we’re so sorry! We’ve had a few complaints about people getting stuck in here. Are you both ok??” The man dressed in all black with an earpiece in asks, worried.

Shane slips his hand into mine and looks down at me smiling. “Yeah, everything’s perfect now.”

#wwe #wwe smackdown #wwe smut #wwe fanfiction #wwe fic #wwe superstars #shane mcmahon #shane mcmahon x reader #wwe x reader #wwe superstar #wwe oneshot #wwe one shot

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leekycauldron-blog1 · 8 years ago

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alicia!! how was ur easter? i've devised a clever trick to keep getting eggs even tho I'm an adult, i tell my mum what egg i want and when she tells me i'm too old i point out that my brother got an egg at my age (he's 3 yrs older) and then they have 2 get him one too to be fair so I do the same thing next year i have unlocked #infinite eggs lmao could I have a br pls for pansyparquinson? thank u love xoxo

omg fran this is so fucking delayed cuz of the amount of work i had but ive finally got around to this!! but omg my easter was good! and that is the cleverest idea! im gonna do that next year i think cuz im sure this was my last year of getting eggs hahahahaha

compliment/advice: ahhh fran i really do love ur blog (nd u) quite a lot. nd pansy is an actual babe im so jel of your url and your domain name!! ahh your blog is one of my favourites (also agian im sorry this is so delayed fml)

#alicia does br #glowinjpg

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mchumsindie · 8 years ago

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avcntgarde xoxo

my opinion on;

character in general: there are a bunch and i love them all??? i lowkey want a thousand oc ships but i have thus far kept my cool you’re welcome also you play an awesome kurt (my life goal is to get u to do kurtic with me) & blair thanks byehow they play them: REALLY WELL obviously everyone is interesting and fun and i love all of your repliesthe mun: you’re super rad and you have my second place dream job which is awesome and you put up with me even though i suck and pls love me

do i;

follow them: yasrp with them: yaswant to rp with them: yasship their character with mine: yas give me twenty ships

what is my;

overall opinion: i’m intimidated and not worthy but in the way that’s a compliment so like yknow they’re really great follow them forever

#i'm so bad at thESE but yknow #avcntgarde #answered prompt.

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survivormuxloe · 6 years ago

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Episode 13: "so things went from Guatemala to Guatepeor” - Ahrre

david REALLY GOT BRAVE TRYNA COME FOR ME WHEN HIS ASS AINT IMMUNE HUH. aint it so.. vote me and ur ass gonna go... ijs!! rip my perf game but at least i was the last person to recieve votes so thats kinda cute.. it doesnt change the fact that im winning tho ALMFNBG like. just 3/4 more tribals to survive bitch.. give those immunity wins to me pls x :)))

LOWKEY MY ASS WAS NERVOUSSSS LIKE I DONT WANNA READ MY NAME ON THOSE PIECES OF PAPER AGAIN THO!!! altho my name is cute written out by anna highkey ngl.. maybe she'll write them in cursive for my winner reveal? x

my mind tho. rhys/tobi/ryan r all under my spell. missus mo and ahrre got brave and are gunna get a taste of hell when im not dying under exams lol x ALMFJHBFG

lvoe u gusys. xoxo ur winner scooty toots

Well fuck. David is gone. I’m in the minority. So now it’s just me and Ahrre. But I don’t want to settle for 6th or 5th place. I’ve made it this far I wanna make it to the end. So I’m going to try to wiggle my way through.

http://images6.fanpop.com/image/photos/41700000/Avengers-Endgame-2019-avengers-infinity-war-1-and-2-41740034-540-225.gif

So the situation is looking pretty grim, Rhys stuck with the majority, David the absolute unit is dead and I wouldn't be surprised if I'm the next one to go.

So right know things change as it's no longer about getting majority but rather get that group of 4 to cannibalize itself. Now the thing is that each of those 4 seem so confident in their position but only 3 make it to the end so that means at least one will end up being left out and that's just with a minimum level of snaking, but we know they are capable of way more shafty shit.

But their overconfidence in their position is not the only problem. It's also kinda hard when I've tried to blindside 3 of them. But hey at least you can't say I didn't try. Tobi is not willing to even tell me anything until tomorrow after we do the challenge. But he also says he's rooting for me as an underdog even if we're in oposite sides... Cheky fecker trying to get my jury vote...

As for the rest well I'll try to talk to them tomorrow, if I can commend Mo for something is that at least they might be more willing to work with him than me, which is clearly not a good thing for my game but eh wadda you do. I know for a fact by now everyone is gonna be saying that the plan is me going home probably 5-1 but if that's gonna end up being true or just a bluff for one of the 4 to get blindsided is still to see.

Either way I'm gonna try to stir some shit up and not be a voulnerable pleb waiting to be taken out or saved. Better dead than a goat.

These fattys are going down one by one... i love it... like highkey david going means that me and scott have to step up our physical games if we wanna take out ryan... someone else has to win immunity and then we can start pinning moves on ryan... I'm slowly repairing my relationship with ahrre by having a frank talk with him about our relationship in the game, which was both awkward but i think it helped??? im trynna work him pretty hard because he's a tough nut to crack but i think i can do it hehe... scott is working on mo but lets be real mo is easier to crack than ahrre, and honestly rhys' performance last tribal was good.. too good imo like.. i previously pinned him as an inactive goat but if he's able to connect with the other side that well and have them believe what he was saying, i have to give him props because that's some good plays in terms of benefiting our alliance for knowledge, bad jury management sure, but good for the alliance... at this point tbh,,, who the fuck cares about jury management... but then again it's important if you wanna win so maybe im just a dumbass

Well right now it’s final 6 and the question of a final 2 or 3 is up for debate because it could be either or.

After that tribal and David left, he tried to expose me when I had exposed myself already to the people he exposed me too. So sis there was no new tea.

Honestly now one of our 4 needs to go. The only one I would feel confident about going to the end with would be Ryan. Just as I feel he has done less. I’m super close with Scott, so I think right now I need to try and convince some people to vote out Ryan.

The only problem is I will probably need to convince Ryan and Scott or mo and ahrre. Mo and ahrre may not that me after lying to them two rounds in a row. And Scott seems to be strong for our alliance sticking to the end. So I’m going for this immunity as if I win it should all the confidence I need to make a move against my own.

I’m not feeling great. I don’t like a conversation I just had. It made me wanna quit. I’m not going to because I wanna do my best.

i really found an idol day 1 and made it to final 6 with it safe and sound.... ctfu how did this even happen, and Scott too we rly did that. the only thing about that is.... at least until we surpass final 5, there's always that worry that im gonna make a fool of myself with it and hnnnng. i feel like our 4 is solid af and yet, i'm still making myself paranoid that Tobi or even Rhys would perk up and randomly try to blindside me or Scott... but anyway yeah thats where my head at rn. i still don't talk to ahrre at all so he's a complete mystery and no idea if anyone else talks to him so that's great. Mo is an oddball still idk what to do w him kfsdfa

So I want to flip on my alliance this round. But 2 people outside my alliance are throwing me hardcore under the bus. Ok. So like how am I gonna make a move now.

pls god... lett this immunity challenge be in my favour alkfjnhfg i just want a win pls pls pls let me be guaranteed f4 lol

I just had a really good conversation with Tobi and it’s making me like really happy because this entire game I’ve gotten the short end of the stick. With people not thinking I don’t deserve to be here, that I’m a goat and people sending me condescending messages about my mistakes. It feels really nice to get praised for the good things. Don’t get me wrong I own up to my mistakes and I do my best to improve and change moving forwardss so I don’t make the same mistakes again. But usually the conversations that happen before that aren’t very happy, they’re needed and they end on a peaceful note but they don’t start out happy. But Tobi just praised me on my gameplay complimenting me and it’s such a good feeling. I think I might end up in fifth or sixth place but I’m still proud of myself and I’m going to keep fighting till the end.

so like... I'm really happy i won immunity but im kinda more annoyed with scott right now like... we had this big plan to take out ryan at 6 which is literally a perfect time now since 1) we can access numbers for it 2) he wont suspect it so the chance of an idol popping up is low 3) we can gain trust with ahrre and mo this way... but NOOOOOOOOO lets play with our emotions instead of our BRAINS and take out someone who has played a bad game and would be EASY to beat in the end like JESUS and i thought ahrre had his head up his ass... also scott is SO fucking confident know like he acts like he will 100% win against anybody in ftc and like sis... that's not the case... not if you're constantly confronting and arguing with mo and ahrre... use. ur. BRAIN.

Cemetery....

Anywho, this vote. Mo & Ahrre are voting me probably. So It seems to be a 4-2 vote. However an Idol may be played now more than ever, as I think this is the first time someone from the bottom hasnt had any hope of staying. (Dani, Felix & Jones were all blindsided , and Michael & David had some chance of staying). So one could easily be played. So ima try to push a 2-2-2 vote to save my ass.

so. (: I lost spelling bee. (: LAMDLFNFG

lowkey feel as if the words are suitable to the player tho. embarrass for ahrre as in that game is embarrassing. accommodate for Mo as in we have to accommodate for the fact that he’s a goat. Cemetary for rhys bc he makes us all wanna die @ tribals. handkerchief for me bc my ass gotta clean up ryan and tobi wanting to target each other.. and rhythm for tobi bc while hes in time rn that time is gonna run out soon :flushed:

i just dont want 6th ):

So I know it’s me and Ahrre on the chopping block. I just kinda wanted to make a quick plea. I really really wanna stay. I want to go as far as I can even if that’s just fifth. Not only to prove people wrong thinking I don’t deserve to be here, but also to prove to myself. Whatever decision you make tonight I respect wholeheartedly. But I’d love to go further.

I CACKLED @ THIS COPY PASTED PLEA.. MO BABY WYD

I’m currently making my plea to the others on why I deserve to stay. I’m proud of myself no matter the outcome but I’d love to go as far as I can.

So ahrre and mo are both kindve pleading for themselves. Mo just wants him to be saved where as ahrre is trying to flip people. He is trying to flip me again which is funny. Lowkey am a little worried just Incase it’s a ploy to get people to vote me or something. But he needs me and tobi to flip. So I think he won’t vote me which is great, incase a surprise idol is played.

soooo final 6 tribal. I definitely want Ahrre to leave finally, so how to make that happen. Scott informed me that mo/ahrre lowkey suspect i have an idol so wig. i would prefer if we went 4 strong on Ahrre bc I really don't think he has any powers, but the thing about that is i don't want to campaign for that to happen and make it look like i feel safe about idols... i don't want tobi or rhys to get suspicious and get the urge to flip on me/scott.. so kinda tricky. we'll see what happens

so recently scott and ryan have really been pounding on mo for his goatness and like... I took advantage of that hehe... I talked to mo and had a real heart to heart with him and like... I told him that he deserves more credit than he's getting and then more wholesome stuff and then BAM we got past the barrier we previously had and now we're totally cool!!... where ryan and scott burn bridges, im gonna build new ones!! so like that wasnt TOTALLY just for strategy like im not that big of an asshole... but its a mix of both. mo is a good kid and he gets too much backlash for his game.. and im gonna take advantage of that by showing up as his guardian angel hehe.. and who knows like this might pay off hugely when i need his vote at f5 to take out a bigger player but for now i'll stick to tending to his wounds that scott and ryan left.. and they really did come for him pretty hard... like REALLY hard so there is no harm in coming to him and helping him with his confidence and who knows, that might be a jury vote right there

Right so things went from Guatemala to guatepeor, I didn't win immunity I actually flopped at it in wonderful fashion it was quite beautiful really. But anyhow Tobi ended up winning it.

So I tried to talk to people and get them to do ANYTHING but to no avail really. Ryan and Scott seem set on stone. I did get Tobi to tell me that if it ties 3-3 he would flip on the revote but that's just playing it safe. Rhys told me he doesn't want to go to rocks so I'm like hey Tobi supposedly flips on the revote so maybe there's no need for that go talk to Tobi.

But they all seem to be giving me the silence threatment right before tribal even Mo has accepted what seems to be me going home.

It's a shame really cause if I do end up going home one of the majority of 4 is gonna regret it the very next week and two more later when the 4th beats them at the end. But hey congrats to that 4th guy whoever it is.

I've tought about doing an idol bluff but it wouldn't make sense for me to tell anyone I have it. Even Mo since if I hipotetically had it he wouldn't help me with it because he would be the one going home probably. Also because I would've definitely played it in a previous round for someone else if I had it and the rest probably knoes that.

Either way rn I'm currently trying to get home in time for tribal since I had to walk a chunk because I almost didn't had enough for the bus fare lel. Who knows maybe I'll survive somehow like the cockroach I am but I don't rate my chances or luck very highly. Either way at the end of the day I'm happy and you can't say I didn't try!

Ahrre is voted out 5-1.

#royallyyours #episode

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