#but if i draw him creepy my brain will go “you look like that btw” and ill get distraugut

[gh0sdae]

Cooking up some comic ideas but then I realize I'll have to draw willy afton probably constantly :(

^ originally referred to him as "old man willy" but I saw the problem very quick

[pumpkinstrawbrew]

🆃🅷🅴 🆆🅸⨢.🅲🅷🅸🅽🅶 🅷△🆄🆁.

>>> the grim adventures of jon n' jack. feat batman n' spiderman. <<<

...

it was only a matter of time, before i would have made another crossover with those two. i can't deny, that they are very 1:1 for me, when it comes to comics supervillains. so why not to mix one awesome n' beloved thing with another? esp since funny enough, they do have quite a few similar plot-points. well, the halloween themed costume aside. i mean it goes as far as jack once having the bat-themed boyfriend pal, which reminds me of someone else, i know.

anyho'...

i've tried to make my notes more or less readable here, but they still might be a bit scattered. i attempted to keep them as short as possible, but i just cannot talk 'small'.

1. the first art is low-key based on underdeveloped AU, that i have about the early comic scarecrow n' modern jack meeting n' hitting it off serial killiar style. considering, that both of them possess killing methods, which have a noticable tradmark to it, i imagine that they will leave one hell of a mess behind, while traveling across the country. in that timeline, batman is dead. n' jack's shitty foster dad was killed off earlier on. neither of them knows what to do with themselves, since the people who they had *twisted* emotional conection with are gone. without any direction, they meet in the middle, n' decide that they can as well team-up n' try to make being a villain fun again. jon might experiment on their victims *or torture them if its his ex bullies* n' then give them to jack, who would scoop their brains out and put candle inside their skull. n' uh yeah, he literally did it in the comic. i was honestly surpised that marvel come up with smth that creepy. it really sounds more alined with dc, if anything. but either way, here they are. two *grieving* psychos going downtown. they will make one another so much worse, i imagine. n' they will totally kill that npc dude btw.

2. dark magic n' the drip. or jon n' jack at their corniest. like, jonathan looks like he watched too much the nightmare before christmas n' jack dress up like count dracula for no reason. it's so random-ish n' cheesy. but with this being said, i love both of those designs, n' think, that they really suit the vibe of comic issues in which they were featured. jack always came off as a he-witch to me, but it was nice to see it being played on in a different way. n' then, crane really rocks his own outfit as well. i totally need to draw him in it more often, haha. they dress up for a halloween party for real this time. n' well, i added batman n' spiderman into the mix here, bc i kinda wish that they got to fight / interact with those versions of jon n' jack. it would have been fun for a few reasons. also this can be technically counted as shipping art, but can be viewed as your typical gloating bad guy n' helpless hero thing too. n' to clear any possible questions, i only create stuff with adult peter parker. like cartoon era/late early comics, 20 smth one. i love my spiderman being of age, where he can legally mingle with his villains, not be detained at school lol.

3. the classic four from the timeline, when the comic plots were a bit more ligthearted. aka during the times, when the deadly mercenary n' crazy scientist were robbing banks, instead of harming *torturing* people. i love dark stuff, but there is charm to how 'simple' the scarecrow's and jack's goals once were. n' i love how the scarecrow used to do the lil, dorky dances. it really suits him. n' since at least 2 or maybe, most of jack o' lanterns are southernish in their roots like jon, i had an idea of them having a country dance *in the middle of graveyard* kinda just makes sense to me, haha. batman and spiderman merely happen to find them like that. n' well, it's kinda awkward. esp bc they technically don't do anything bad. i also imagine spiderman being like 'oh, so you have one of those too'. which is mostly a ref to how both the scarecrow n' jack were called 'the reject from land of oz' by other characters. they can rejoice here.

4. the develish & undead duo!! my friend once told me to try n' watch older superhero cartoons, and at first i was like 'welp, they prob be hella boring'. but then i caved in, n' watched a couple of superfriends episodes. as result, i fell in love with their scarecrow's desingh! it was unexpected tbh. usually, i prefer jon's older, classic scarecrow look. so no straw hair, less features exposed, just a hat n' a sack on his head, but their version of him actually did it for me. i find their crane both creepy n' cute. n' i also read on wiki, that he might be undead. so that bit interested me as well. non-human jonathan crane, what a concept! him returning from the grave just to be a menace to batman. n' to accompany him, there is an undead jack o' lantern from the ghost rider comic. his corpse literally got possessed by satan. anyways, both of them raised army of zombies. both of them undead n' prob won't ever get out of their spooky suits, since i don't think that they can. n' funny enough, jack's hometown was called sleepy hollows, if i remember correctly. so they can haunt people there, make it into a truly cursed land.

5. the last one was kinda spontaneous on my part. the other day, i was looking at what kind of action figures the scarecrow n' jack have. saw one, where jon was looking kinda strange, all black n' yellow. which is how i find out that he *apparently* got yellow lantern powers in newer comics, even if it was like for 10 seconds or smth. i didn't read the issue itself, but i found the idea kinda fun, n' his design was decent enough for me to get interested n' wonder what i can do with it. then, a bit later, i saw that jack had a venom-funko figure. i don't think, that he was ever canonically venomized in any of the actual comic issues, but once again, the mere idea of it happening was enough for me to consider doing smth with it. i mean, a venom-like tongue, but its made out of fire? dang. that's kinda cool. so yeah. the yellow lantern scarecrow n' symbiote jack o' lantern being the double trouble. if they weren't enough of a mean goblin-man before, now they surely will be.

[intertexts-moving]

YOUR TAAAAGS YOUR TAGS YOUR TAGS YOUR TAGS. ok. off is kind of hit or miss for most people because its so weird and vague and i am extremely biased bc its one of my favorite thinfs ever BUT. i am going 2 say i think u will love it actually. its got soooo many fairytaleisms. its got tragedy. its got extremely morally grey characters. theres no good guys or bad guys. ITS GOT WEIRD LITTLE GHOSTS !!!!!! look at these bitches i used 2 doodle the off spectres in my notebooks like constantly they feel like home 2 me

the art style is so unsettling and creepy. its got sketchy lines and weird freak of nature characters. i am going to be EXTREMELY selfish here in saying that i think u will very much enjoy the art style and also i want 2 see how u would draw some of the characters bc ur style is very monochrome and messy (<< i mean this in a beloved sense i love your linework so much) and i think it fits the vibe so perfectly. on a completely unrelated note are you still taking commissions.

ITS GOT ONE OF THE ALL TIME BEST OSTS EVER BTW. i still have the main battle theme (which is called pepper steak btw. best name for a song ever) as my ringtone on my phone. my video game ost rank goes 1.portal 2 2. off 3. undertale 4. minecraft. the off ost holds higher regard in my brain than undertale. shaking your shoulders it fits the vibe of the game soooo perfectly.

i will not get into the story too much here bc i already talked about some vague spoilery stuff in that post and i dont want to tell u too much more in case u do play the game urself BUT. ohhh my god. i could talk about the story for hours. u can ask aster after we finished the game we sat on call for like 2 hours while i walked her through my personal take on the ending and then she gave me her thoughts on the ending and EVEN THOUGH WE PLAYED THE GAME TOGETHER AT THE SAME TIME (i streamed it for her) WE HAD DIFFERENT OPINIONS ON THE END. ITS SOOOOO FUCKING GOOD its one of those things where like. its so open ended that nobody ever gets into fights about what the "right ending" is because. well. there isnt one UGH i love that shit.

also zacharie is here. he is such a beloved character to me hes been one of my biggest huge comfort characters since like. 2015. i love him. hes like sans undertale for people in 2008. he was the original sans undertale. i think they would be best friends

oh also despite the fact that the setting is very much like. weird abstract, sort of fantasy sort of industrial, the main character is a fucking baseball player. hes so out of place its so funny

^ official art btw. to give u a taste of mortis ghost's art style. its so silly and weird i love it so much

OK THAT WAS MY OFF PROPAGANDA SORRY FOR INVADING UR INBOX I LOVE YOU also ive been in a huge off mood for like 3 days now and have not been able to talk about it so im EXPLODING now

OHHHHGHGHGHGHHH. MACKERELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL MAC U CAN'T DO THIS TO ME..... ohhhh my god. ok. ok yeah im pinky promising u right now i WILL play it. like. SOON. it looks so good hooly shit. game that i can TELL will rearrange my brain. also it looks SO nice... i like the art style so much. mac u are GETTING me here u KNOW what u are doing. u cant just go ros theres an unsettling morally gray tragic game with an incredible ost and weird art and NOT expect me to go fucking bonkers.

[sillysadduck]

Hello! i THINK you said you are a hater of claire ( dhmis ) right?

may i ask y do you hate her so much? and thank you for responding!

( mostly i can respect ur opion cuz i dont really like claire. overall shes very hard to draw for me-- )

( AND IM SORRY IF SOMEONE ASKED YOU THIS ALREADY AND I DIDNT CHECK!!- btw take your time to respond! )

HELLOOO yeah I can explain that bc it probably doesn't make any sense for new followers and all that, sorry if this is too long idk how to keep things short 😭 I was ok with the character at first like she's just a boring background character with no personality, whatever. Even if she's extremely overrated for no reason, again I was ok with that because it's whatever.

The thing is people started mentioning her in things like MY POSTS that had nothing to do with her and making gross comments about Yellow because of that character. Comments like "omg its so funny that he has the brain of a child and still had sex in front of everyone look how cute he looks in this art but he's a pervert 😍🥰". Go on Tiktok for five minutes under the tag and I'm sure you'll find them, I'm not making this up.

And they completely forgot Yellow is his own character outside of Claire. Making jokes about him being a pervert, being "so horny he forced her to have sex at work" and also hating on people who hc him as aroace because "hE's mArRied😡😡" and imo he was never 'married' it was just an illusion that lasted a day. But finding a Claire fan that wasn't like that was super hard. So I just decided to straight up say I hate the character so people stop mentioning her and being gross in my posts.

Even when I genderswapped the characters, (Yellow is a kid in my personal hc) I had them under my posts saying how lucky Claire would be to [insert inappropriate comments about the things they would do to that version of Yellow that was obviously drawn as a child. Super rapey. I don't even want to remember.]

TLDR: my problem is mostly the fans, but I've been through hell with Claire fans. Some of them are so disgusting and obviously into underage and noncon. If they hc both as adults that can consent and dont make it creepy then good! But that wasn't the case with the ones I've met. And I'm not risking it.

[thinkingisadangerouspastime]

I just want to say, before I say anything, I'm not accusing you of saying this and I understand that you feel how you feel. I'm just asking this in a very general way and was wondering your thoughts. Why is it so verboten to think Zuko might have had a slight crush on Katara? There seems to be a rush to not just deny it but to treat it like it's some sort of horrible thing to even suggest it and I'm not sure why that is?

Katara is presented as a beautiful, lively girl who is a powerful bender. Why wouldn’t Zuko be a little starry eyed over that? It doesn’t mean she likes him back. Idk, I’m not exactly sure where my point is, except that being shouted down for just advancing the idea that maybe Zuko had the hots for Katara is a little frustrating? I’m not saying he was wacking off in his bunk thinking about her or expected to get some while they were hunting Yon Rha.

Also, unrequited crushes happen in ATLA-verse? Toph/Sokka anyone? Why does that never get screeched on but saying “Hey, Zuko loved Mai but he was probably looking at Katara and thinking ‘noice!’ a couple of times” the worst thing in the world? Is it the Water Tribe/Fire Nation thing? I mean, if it’s that, I wish people would just say that and stop screaming at people for their headcanons and whatnot. [theend]

Lol do not worry anon I know this isn’t an accusation!! Not only have I myself never perpetuated this rhetoric, but I don’t think I’ve really heard it before! Maybe once or twice?? I might just keep to chill parts of fandom, lmao, and that’s why I’m not very familiar with it. But I’ll do my best to theorize what may spark conflict based on the info you provided me!

(I’ve talked very briefly here about Zuko having/not having a crush on Katara before, if you were wondering.)

My main guess is that it’s not the headcanon itself that makes people frustrated, but how some shippers probably treat the HEADcanon as canon-canon (not an issue exclusive to Zvtara, btw; all big fanon ships have this problem - Zvkka, anyone? lmao). I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with headcanoning that Zuko had a crush on Katara! But in that same vein, there’s nothing inherently wrong with others acknowledging that the headcanon has no basis in canon either, if that makes sense. And headcanons don’t need canon basis! Headcanons are fanon! That’s why they’re so much fun! I ship Kuzaang like there’s no tomorrow, but I can also acknowledge that there wasn’t anything in canon that demonstrated Aang having a crush on Kuzon. Kuzaang is strictly fanon, and I love that about the pairing! It means I have incredible free reign, hehe.

But yeah. I don’t think it has anything to do with their different nations! Like I said - it’s probably solely an issue of some shippers (and undoubtedly just a loud minority) treating the headcanon as canon.

I don’t think saying “Hey, Zuko loved Mai but he was probably looking at Katara and thinking ‘noice!’ a couple of times” is the worst thing in the world, lmao. I do want to make a distinction here, though; this example you provide is actually an example of aesthetic attraction, which is not the same as a crush (crushes are indicative of romantic attraction)! So saying/headcanoning that Zuko thought Katara was pretty (as anyone with a brain would say, let’s be real) does not actually equate to him having a crush on her.

But back to the crush headcanon. I mentioned that I (personally!) don’t think it has canon basis. I will admit that I am not alloromantic, so crushes in themselves are a little confusing to me (I mean,, people just randomly like someone?? based on their appearance?? without even knowing them?? hell nah), but even disregarding that, I don’t think it would make much sense within canon for Zuko to have had a crush on Katara.

Again, disclaimer: there’s nothing wrong with the headcanon! Fanon is meant to contradict canon! To expand canon! To rewrite canon! Fanon is transformative. That’s the entire purpose of fanon. Go wild with that headcanon!! Make art!! Produce fics!! Support content creators!! Hell yeah!!

So what do I mean when I say that I personally feel there’s no canon basis for Zuko having a crush on Katara? Well, for one, he joined the Gaang in episode 12 of Book 3. That’s episode 52 of 61 overall. So in everything prior to that, Zuko not only has no idea who Katara is but he is also neck-deep in imperialistic rhetoric (you know, racism, superiority complexes, all that jazz. not fun for anyone non-FN). No possible crush there. In “The Western Air Temple” episode itself, Katara (understandably) threatens Zuko. She means what she says, and I think Zuko recognizes that. A crush there wouldn’t make sense - they’ve only properly met this second time and Katara (understandably) hates Zuko’s guts for what he’s done to the Gaang and to her personally.

Episode 53 is “The Firebending Masters” - Zuko’s too hung up on his firebending not working to think about anything else (Katara obviously still does not trust him yet, either, meaning Zuko is pretty much on edge around her. again, she threatened him, and Zuko no doubt took her threat seriously).

54 and 55 are “The Boiling Rock” episodes; not only are these Maiko-heavy but also in general… I mean, Katara’s not really in them. At least not from Zuko’s POV. So nothing implies a crush there. And then after those episodes, it’s worth considering that Zuko probably thinks Mai is dead. That he left her, the girl he loves, to die at Azula’s hands. We know Zuko tends to hold guilt to his chest, so concluding he blamed himself for Mai’s “death” is not illogical. Why would he all of sudden switch his sights to Katara, even if it was just a simple crush? While he’s grieving? That doesn’t track to me.

And then, of course, “The Southern Raiders.” This episode has been talked about to death, so I’ll keep it brief, lmao. I will draw attention to only one line, spoken by Zuko:

This isn’t fair! Everyone else seems to trust me now! What is it with you?

As we all know, TSR was not a flattering episode for Zuko. He was a racist asshole to Aang and - as aforementioned - acted as if he was entitled to Katara’s trust. Obviously, Zuko grows through the episode, and we see by the end that he respects Aang’s wisdom and respects Katara’s decision to walk away from Yon Rha (which is awesome!! I adore this brief but incredibly crucial arc of his!!). But my point is that nothing demonstrates romantic interest from Zuko to Katara. If anything, his initial motives are pretty damn selfish (i.e. demanding her to trust him because he feels like he “deserves” it already).

Emphasis on “initial” motives, of course. Obviously he grows more sincere!! (Tis the point of the episode for Zuko.)

So they end TSR on new, peaceful terms. Personally, I don’t think their relationship would be magically sunshine and roses after that (Zuko did some fucked up shit to the Gaang, lmao), but I do think things are getting better between them! Still, there is nothing indicative of a canon crush.

Next episode, in EIP, they scoot away from each other at the possibility of being together, yk? That doesn’t mean they hate each other’s guts, lmfao, but EIP is meant to depict imperialist Fire Nation propaganda - who wouldn’t be uncomfortable with that? Like, the entire Gaang is demeaned in that play. There’s nothing romantic about it. It’s a similar situation later with June - this is a lady that doesn’t know anything remotely personal about Zuko or Katara. Of course they’d react in a horrified and flustered manner when this - for all intents and purposes - total stranger suggests that they’re together! That’s creepy as hell! Definitely not indicative of a crush, lmao. And considering that the Gaang never teases Zuko about having a crush on Katara (compared to how I think Toph teases Katara about Haru?), i.e. the people who know them the best, there’s no reason for the audience to think anything is going on between them.

For other references, here are a few addressing EIP, June, etc.

And after all that… Well, now we’re in the finale. What time is there for romance? There’s a reason the canon couples don’t reunite until after the war is won! (Minus Sukka, I guess, but they’re not professing their love on the battlefield, per se, lmao.) Zuko chooses Katara to go with him because she’s a powerful waterbender and the only person who’s been able to handle Azula in the past (besides Aang, arguably, who’s obviously occupied with Ozai), not because he “likes” her in a romantic sense.

All of this is to say that to me, Zuko having a crush on Katara is strictly fanon. Which is awesome! Fanon is fantastic, and I actually really like these types of headcanons (like, Teo having a crush on Aang? GOOD SHIT). Some people are just jerks about it. That said, I can still understand why people might get frustrated by those who preach this headcanon as if it’s pulled straight from the text itself. I absolutely think it’s ridiculous to harass others over a headcanon (which unfortunately you see on both sides of the ship war), but in that same vein - of course it’s frustrating when those loud few act like their fanon is canon and proceed to shove it down others’ throats, lmao. It’s an imperfect situation, basically.

TL;DR - The headcanon in itself is great, and no one should be getting freaking harassed over it. But it is strictly fanon, so when some shippers treat it like canon, that’s understandably going to frustrate the rest of the fandom. Headcanons are a double-edged sword, lmao.

So that’s my personal theory as to why people get pressed over this headcanon. If anyone else has a different idea, please feel free to rb/comment with it!

[the8thsphynx]

p,,, p l e a s e ? I mean, please don't feel pressured to tell us about Herc either though!!! but if you want to ramble about her I'll very happily listen,,,,, as a greek mythology buff with fate brain rot your Herc makes me,,,, very happy,,,,, 🥺

HECC YEAH!

Alright, so as a disclaimer, she looks Like That(tm) because I’ve had Heracles as an OC since I was like an 11yo, so LONG before I even knew Fate existed and I’m not planning on changing the way she looks to look more like FSF/FSN Herc.

I also think that the armor I already have designed on her looks closer to Achilles/Jason/Asclepius/Odysseus’s more mecha-centered looks for Fate Greek Servants.

Next, I’ve established that the reason she is female is two separate reasons, and this has to do with compatibility for Roleplay:

When I did roleplay with others, I just had it set that she was from Musashi’s timeline and she isn’t actually the Heracles/Alcides of our timeline.

For my personal writing, it’s like an Artoria situation where history chose to remember her as a man because misogynistic Ancient Greece being like, ‘well there’s no way a woman could be a child of Zeus and this powerful and skilled at being in charge, so you must actually be a man’.

Second Disclaimer: no one has permission to take my designs and recreate them or use them for RP or fanfics.

SO listed below are the major points about her history in this verse and also how she currently operates as a Servant!!

In her history:

Same song and dance as the beginning where her powers surfaced at a young age, so Chiron found her and took her in to train her to be a hero. However, the change-up here is that Zeus gifted Heracles a portion of his power when she was born because he had the intention of this child being the hero that would guide Greece into a new age as his tickcet for his bet with Hera (this was in the 12 Trials original writing). Basically she never had a choice on whether or not she would be a hero.

When she traveled to Thebes in order to attempt to enter the Thebian Army, a whole situation happened with a coup and an attack with a hydra from Lernaea that got lured to Thebes from a nest by the people doing the coup... It was an entire thing. Heracles defeated the hydra and helped identify the traitor guards, so she was able to prove herself to Queen Eurydice and King Creon, who immediately had her married to their son Megara (below).

(he may have been in line for the Thebian throne and an incredibly skilled warrior, but he was THE Malewife.)

A bit before she moved to Thebes, when she was staying in Athens, Eurystheus met her and fell in love with her, but when she rejected his feelings that was when Hera came to him and ‘chose him as her champion’ so she could start her dirty ass scheme.

Heracles had a happy and loving marriage with Megara and they had one daughter and two sons. She would frequently go out with the Argonauts, but always came home to them as soon as she got back on shore.

When the Hera Snake Shit(tm) happened, Heracles was... broken. After the fact, the shock and grief made her go mad all over again until she dragged herself to Thebes and tried to convince Eurystheus to execute her, but because he was in cahoots with Hera he forced Heracles to the 12 Trials instead to ‘redeem’ herself... and this shit lasted 12 years, btw. So that’s 12 years of retraumatizing herself by being forced to do these impossible feats to be forgiven for the murders she was forced by Hera to commit... on top of Hera also sabotaging the Trials wherever she could.

When Heracles completed the initial 10, Eurystheus tricked her into two more, and after completing those two she snapped and nearly killed him, screaming at him to free her. It was then that Eurystheus bitched out and confessed everything to Heracles; Hera’s hatred, her whole plan... all of it. Heracles then stormed her ass out of Mycenae and Thebes and never returned.

She spent the rest of her life until her death by Nessus being cruel, cold, and tyrannical. Heracles had 1 (one) last biological child that she left with a king who would eventually raise that child to found Sparta (Leonidas’s ancestor), but the rest of her very numerous children were all actually orphaned or less fortunate children that she adopted so they could claim the title of ‘child of Heracles’ to help themselves get ahead in life (this is where the Heracleidae came to be). Even so, she usually left them on their own and didn’t open herself to them as a mother-figure.

Her life as a Servant:

She may have manifested as an Avenger class, but this is because of Megara becoming a part of her soul and manifesting with her as the manifestation of her hatred for the gods; he’s made the active choice to turn himself into the arrow meant to kill Hera.

If it weren’t for Megara bonding with her Spirit Core, Heracles would qualify for Grand Berserker class. Because of this, Heracles still has a Madness Enhancement factor that will kick in when she encounters a god. Very similar to when Penthisilea goes buckwild at the mention of Achilles, except it only activates and makes her black out when she is face-to-face with and aware that someone is a god.

Despite being an Avenger, she has an incredibly sweet disposition, especially towards kids. A habit from her life that stuck with her as a Servant is that if she sees a child (Heroic Spirit or not) who has no parents or awful parents, she WILL adopt them and start calling them her child, and no, not in the creepy weird m*mmy k*nk way, foh. In some cases, she’ll just adopt someone because they look like they could be her child. One fucking hilarious instance of this is that she has adopted Archer Emiya even though he gripes all the time that they look the same age physically. Does she care?? NO, that’s her son, babey!

Her Noble Phantasms are the almost the same as FSF Archer Alcides, especially Reincarnation Pandora and King’s Order... and Reincarnation Pandora is actually the reason why she would up contracting with Goetia. But she also has the manifestation of all 12 Trials, albeit in a different form than what Archer Alcides can bring them forth as, and this is because by some handiwork by Daedalus, Heracles can alter the King’s Order to adapt to whatever situation she needs them for.

ex: Cerberus can become a motorcycle aside from also being a three headed hellhound and the famous Lernian Hydra can turn into a Mercedes Benz aside from also being the fuck-off giant Kinghidorah.

Daedalus messing with Heracles’s Noble Phantasms is the most shown in her (Daedalus is a woman in this verse bc fuk u) alteration of Nine Lives to be a multi-adaptable weapon with nine different functionalities that Heracles can flip them to at a moment’s notice. These alternate forms include: bow, twin swords, double-ended spear, polearm, long barreled rifle, twin short arms, bludgeon, battering ram, and can even conform to the braces on her arms and become gauntlets (yes, her and Ruler Martha would vibe).

(I realize that this isn’t the best design, I’m still working on drawing weapons)

Oh, I almost forgot about her other non-combatant quirk: she fucking LOVES blond men. If a grown dude is a blond and NOT a Greek-- regardless of anything else about their physical appearance-- it cranks their attractiveness scale up by at least 2 points for her. Goetia, Fionn, Arthur/Artoria, Gawain, Kintoki, Gilgamesh (he’s on thin fuckin ice), Jekyll, Goredolf... none of them are safe.

She also very much loves modern era fashion and dressing up. Heracles quickly befriends a lot of the female Servants/staff and goes on periodic ladies nights out with them.

[atalante241]

Imagine if Samukai just took Zane along with Dr. Julien, as a measure to make sure he did stuff.

Considering the fact that Zane’s memory switch was turned off when Dr. Julien died, that would mean that he’d have no idea how he got to the island. So Dr. Julien has an option, tell him or to not tell him.

Not telling him: Zane wouldn’t think mutch of being trapped on the island, he’s spent his life up to that point living in the Birchwood forest so he wouldn’t really think much about the fact that he was now just trapped someplace else. When the skulkin show up to check on Dr. Juliens work Zane’s super friendly to them because “oh, hello nice to meet you my name is Zane”, the skulkin would probably be super confused about his chirpyness. But after they take whatever they need from Dr. Julien they demand to know why Zane’s so freaking chipper, “oh, I didn’t tell him” “why???” “Idk, just figured it would be better”

Dr. Juliens tells Zane something like “oh these here.... nice ppl, uh. Helped me feel better, that’s why I’m not super duper dead right now. Aight champ?”, and Zane’s just like “oKaY”

Telling him: Zane would be pissed, not idiotic pissed just grumpy angry. He would scowl at the skulkin from underneath the stairs when they’d show up.

After they stop coming he gets worried for his daddy-o because food, so he starts diving, getting somewhat damaged in the process because starteeth are things that exists in Ninjago. He kinda befriends the leviathan, but doesn’t free him until the ninja show up and start to leave the island with the two of them.

He has this place below the stairs that’s blocked off with blankets, it’s where he spends the nights: reading and drawing because of boredom. (Dr. Julien forbid him from leaving the lighthouse during the night, because it’s dangerous.) The falcon came with them, so Zane spends his time with it. Sometimes it leaves for the mainland to search for help, this is because Dr. Julien realized that it could help with their rescue. But it just mostly spends that time helping the ninja.

Echo doesn’t exist in this AU (sry), ‘cause it woluld be kinda creepy to make a model replica of your son when you two are living together.

When the ninja show up lots of talking happens, (Not told!Zane is very shocked to hear that the skulkin are the reason that the 2 of them r there) the ninja and crew find out that Zane’s an Android when he gets half of his face chewed off when he dives into the ocean to free the leviathan. When the ninja leave for the temple of light Zane comes with them because he feels like he has to for some BiZaRe reason (it’s the vision thing), would you believe it that everyone’s a little shocked to find that the random android from the middle of nowhere that they found on accident is actually the EM of ice. He receives a very small amount of training, mostly how to hold a sword without killing himself.

After that he helps with the school, but recivess very little training so he’s above Dareth or around him in skill. He still dies in s3. S4 rly the same but Zane finds his true potential, somebody else figures out the dragon thing. S5 Zane figures out spinjitzu at the start of the season, and then has to cram airjitzu into his brain just after. He isn’t the best at it, and by that I mean he learned it after Nya.

Zane really isn’t recognized as a ninja by the public, just as the hero who blew himself up to save them all.

Everything still happens but Zane’s just some amounts less skilled, s11 (ice chapter) is more manipulative from Vex. But at the same time Zane is a 40-100 yr old man, because he was built like 40 yrs ago, then he got sent back in time in the never realm for like 60 yrs so that means he’s like a 100 at the end of season 11.

So in this AU, the ninja are babysitted by a calm 40/100 year old man. That isn’t Wu. This Zane also has a fascination with yellow butterflies, and the falcon looks still the same as it did at the start. (He totally has a yellow butterfly generator in his chest.)

He uses more flowy clothes, like a white kimono kinda thing, with those wooden sandals with socks thing that Japan’s got going. He’s got this mystical wibe about him at the end of s11. He totally hides those big ass shurikens and smaller ones in his sleeves, I’ve now decided that the bow is made out of ice but the arrows are just normal arrows. He stores them the same as the shurikens.

So he’s basically got more a graceful, calm feel to him. Even though he’s not the best fighter he’s a good listener, but that doesn’t mean that he isn’t somewhat socially awkward. It wouldn’t be Zane without the awkwardness.

Dr. Julien still dies btw.

[mmmmalo]

@overtrolled-liveblog‘s recent post on Gamzee made me realize that Gamzee’s first interaction with Terezi (Terezi attempting to hurt Gamzee and being angry when he doesn’t react) is also the basic dynamic of Terezi’s ill-fated attempt to “avenge” herself upon Gamzee around Game Over. I never understood why Terezi’s was manifesting for Gamzee in that interaction, but the repetition seems like a good lead. So here’s an attempt:

Aranea’s mind control is being juxtaposed with whatever allowed Gamzee to maintain his composure in Act 5. Sopor is an obvious candidate, as is his general early interest in avoiding conflict, but there might be something else to it...

2018. When Gamzee remarks (in the narration) that "it is dangerous to leave unarmed", the commentary has this to say: "It's probably not actually that dangerous to leave unarmed. This was probably something his goat dad told him a long time ago. But only to scare him, and make sure he stayed inside so no one would ever see him, because he was so embarrassed by him. Goatdad is probably one of the most sympathetic characters in the story. If Gamzee was your son, wouldn't you abandon him too?" Glib dismissal, veering sharply into needless cruelty. But it nonetheless draws attention to the narration's unreliability, moored as it is to Gamzee's POV.

2017. Speaking of unreliable: "You aren't supposed to eat that slime. It does funny things to a troll's head. // But you were never taught that on account of a lousy upbringing. Your custodian was always out to sea." Gamzee is evidently thinking the very thing he was never taught, but he attributes that thought to a higher power (the narrator) and thereby pleads ignorance of it? Or it could be read as an expression of shame: as Gamzee eats his pie, he imagines a stern voice admonishing him from over his shoulder. OR you might more literally parse the contradiction as the voice of two separate Gamzees sharing the brain space in some kind of daze...or you could call it simple memory loss. These are inclusive ors, btw.

2019. Anyway, Gamzee reaches the beach and we get this line: "You leave your hive and head out to the beach. There is no sign of your custodian. // You should not stay out here very long. The SEA DWELLERS are quite hostile." Commentary on his custodian's absence, followed by a voice of authoritative behavioral cautioning, as though a guardian were living in Gamzee's head. Immediately following this, Terezi manifests for Gamzee, though he doesn't answer immediately... so I suspect Terezi's manifestation will be an elaboration this internal division?

2020: "You're always down for shooting the wicked shit with anyone that who'll put up with you." Man... Act 5 is misery. The Miracle Modus is a picture of Gamzee's brain being fried to a point of being nearly inaccessible. Vivid flashing colors (like Jade's rich scents) are a mark of unfiltered EXPERIENCE sans language/reason (which is probably why Lord English's eyes are flashing), but here that means disorientation -- difficulty organizing sense experience...

2022: Gamzee says a prayer and Faygo gets launched out of his sylladex... is the Faygo the prayer? Jane launched wishes into the sky with the balloons on LOCAH -- but the balloon shape was inverted and transformed into Gamzee's bottles of "potion"... that association seems to be expressed more concisely here. Jane's case was also related to decapitation motifs, which I don't really see with Gamzee here... (aside from Terezi's general association with going for the neck) But at any rate, what is he wishing for?

2023. Gamzee standing in front of his sylladex is getting to me, even more so that his reaching into the sylladex. You are not SUPPOSED to be on that layer of the image. What are you doing. Is that safe? Are you okay?

2024. The conversation itself...continues to evade summarization. I'm going to just describe it piece-by-piece and see if I get anywhere.

Terezi deliberately misspells Gamzee's name in service of a joke: from 'gamzeez' to 'gamezez', highlighting its phonetic proximity to 'games'. Though I wonder if this disguises another sort of exchange: Gamzee goes down to the beach to find his dad, but instead finds Terezi. I'm humoring the idea that she is effectively functioning as the fatherly authority in Goatdad's place. But as the preceding panels indicates, that very notion of authority occupies a place in Gamzee's head that he remains somewhat...detached from? If Terezi gives voice to this aspect of Gamzee, the word blurring could obfuscate that she is saying "Gamzee" /twice/, such that her invitation to play games is an offer for Gamzee to pilot himself? (Which in the parent:child::head:body paradigm is not entirely ridiculous?)

Come to think of it, this is the second time Terezi has harassed someone on a waterfront (hi, Rose) and even then main subjects were a) haha your guardian abandoned you because you're terrible and b) a sense of hearing imploring voices in your head...

Terezi implies that she doesn't like Gamzee and is only inviting him in service of a joke. Gamzee ignores the ulterior message and accepts the given reason as justifiable... after which Terezi gets angry. But she doesn't seem angry that the implication was misunderstood (and her disdain ignored) but is rather angry that the arbitrariness of his selection wasn't itself objectionable -- /after/ which she confirms her own disdain by saying "no wonder Vantas can't stand you". The motivation for the joke became the effect of the joke...

"BUT WHO C4R3S 4BOUT H1M, W3R3 GO1NG TO H4V3 SOM3 MOTH3RFUCK1NG SH1TTY B1TCH3S PL4Y1NG TOG3TH3R!" as Rose said, "Still not sure if I'm being courted or trolled here." Terezi is making fun of how Gamzee talks but nonetheless seems to be attempting to bond with him here...?

With "keeping an eye out" and "you know how it is with family" back-to-back with Terezi's aggression, it kind of feels like Gamzee is likewise (successfully) attempting to bother Terezi... but his defense is his forgetfulness, like a taboo subject just slipped... the same is true of Gamzee's claim that he was never taught that sopor is dangerous, the legitimacy of which depends on Gamzee forgetting?

"The Bard of... fuck, i forgot" is literally a joke on Gamzee "forgetting" his way around anger and aggression, by way of the omission of Rage? Also, it's a generic phrase but John uses 'fuck i forgot' when reminded of his birthday in the Epilogues... topic of birthdays is significant since Gamzee parses his state of mind as 'spacing out' and 'losing track of time' -- a birthday is, in that context, a reminder of time's progression.

Twice in Gamzee's conversation he asks Terezi for a little bit more time before he plays the game with her. This again reminds us of Rose's procrastination -- which among other things represents a deferral of encounter with the Truth, again bringing us to forgetting.��

2028. But interestingly enough, the motif of procrastination continues in the section with Karkat that follows: Karkat expresses apprehension about meeting his guardian before the narrative segues to Terezi, which is structurally resonant with Gamzee going to the beach for his guardian, only to find Terezi? Which again associates her with unseen authority figures... 

Oh shoot, and the panel cuts from Karkat looking down through the hole in his floor to a low-angle shot of Terezi's skylight? As though she were below like crabdad. That seals it for me.

2030. Actually, I mentioned how Gamzee's flashing modus is related to the unmediated sensory bouquet that Lord English sees ALL THE TIME by having flashing eyes, but Terezi's room? Is set up to be exactly that sensory bouquet, all the time, with loud colors plastered and mixed haphazardly. I've mostly focused on Terezi's relation to English by way of their shared association with the Law (x)(x) but this is a fresh angle...

And since it becomes apparent that the scenes that /follow/ Gamzee's conversation inform the way it should be read, I would be remiss to exclude the Karkat/Sollux conversation between the Gamzee and Terezi sections... in which the ~ATH (til death) code is brought up, which proves central to Lord English's creation.

2026. "later on you would run this code in a fit of stupidity." Creepy! I always assume the narration to be bound to the present tense, like the character's POV, so this sudden interruption from the future is really unnerving. How does Karkat know this? Is that just a miserable self-assessment, like he knows he'll harm himself when he gets worked up? Is this Karkat planning to curse everyone, but renouncing his decision as a product of fate? I feel like this confusion nicely complements the paradoxical ~ATH code on screen (Sollux's double reacharound virus)

2027. "Speak of the devil" Sollux has manifested for Karkat... yeah I still can't make sense of this as far as manifestation goes. BUT I think the fact that chatlogs are likewise two-colored might mean that Sollux and Karkat's conversation is in some sense analogous to the code...? The architecture of the conversation is... accusing eachother of self-loathing and then agreeing upon mutual self-destruction (of the conversational log), which at least superficially resembles a program that exists to destroy itself and the medium in which it resides? Maybe...

Shot in the dark: the (much procrastinated) march unto Truth is a march unto Judgement, which means both God and Death. Thus Gamzee (the procrastinator who avoids truth) transitions to Karkat/Sollux (vaguely suicidal gesture in their conversation) transitions to Terezi (judge and executioner, associated with ultimate authority and thus God). That's my best assessment of the proceedings thus far.

[heyyyharry]

In Another Life Series: Chapter 8 - The Curse

…in which Y/N discovers the truth, and Harry is just late.

Series description: Y/N and Harry are soulmates and destined to meet in every lifetime, but no matter how many times they reincarnate and find each other again, they never seem to get it right.

AU: reincarnation, soulmate!harry, prince!harry, assistant!y/n, witch!y/n.

Chapter 7 - The Tour: Harry’s tour begins, and Y/N struggles with her feelings for him.

(So this is pretty dark...but it turned out better than I’d expected. Btw, all the characters besides Harry, Jeff, Mitch, Sarah don’t exist in real life lol)

wattpad link

.

Jason loved Y/N. It was obvious, like a written fact. His parents knew, all their friends knew, only she didn’t. Well, Jason assumed she probably did, but in order to keep their friendship from falling apart, she pretended like she had no idea. 

She called him up again tonight and told him, Harry/ her boss/ the-man-she-was-in-love-with decided to stay in his toxic relationship, choosing his girlfriend and not her. Y/N was crying, and Jason swore he almost booked a plane ticket to go see her right away. He’d known it was a bad idea since she started having these dreams about Harry, which had gotten quite intense lately; the most recent one being him getting hit by a car right in front of her eyes. It wasn’t just a nightmare because she woke up crying and gasping for air. 

Jason couldn’t logically explain the reason why this guy named Harry had such a tremendous impact on his best friend that it was gradually driving her insane. However, he knew it would be best if she came back home. 

“I will,” she told him, to his surprise. “I’ve…made up my mind. I’m going to quit.”

“Are you sure?” He asked though he felt so relieved knowing she was going to walk away from the job that had been tormenting her from the beginning.

“We’re doing the LA show tomorrow night and I’ll let him know right after that. Don’t worry.” The sigh at the end of her sentence left a heavy feeling in the bottom of his stomach. She truly loved this man who didn’t love her, and the worst thing about that was Jason knew exactly how she must have felt.

“I’m sorry for calling you up, J. Thank you for hearing me out,” she said.

To which he replied saying it was not a big deal. “We’re best friends, aren’t we?”

“The bestest.” He could feel a smile in those two words. “I’ll call you tomorrow. Good night, J. Love you.”

“Love you,” he repeated what she’d just said, while meaning something else entirely different.

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.

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Ann sat by the fireplace in her dark room, all windows were closed and the only source of light in presence was the flame dancing before her eyes. She was bored, so she tapped her forefinger once, almost putting out the fire and then one more time to revive it. The witch repeated her magic trick a couple more times, when all of a sudden, there was a knock on the door, which caught Ann off guard, causing the flame to flare and knocking Ann right off her chair. 

She sat on the floor, eyes wide, mouth agape, chest heaving up and down as she had no idea what had just happened, and how. For a second there, she lost control of her own power.

The person knocked louder this time. Ann hurriedly stood up, then told them that they could now enter.

“Ann, darling, I brought you your meal,” said the young maid who was carrying a tray into the room. Ann was disappointed because she’d been expecting to see Edward, though she’d known it couldn’t have been him in the first place, he wouldn’t have knocked.

“Marina,” spoke Ann as the maid turned to leave. “Do you have an idea where Edward might be?”

“No, dear, I haven’t seen His Highness today,” she replied with a sympathetic smile.

“Oh….”

“He’s been busy you know. I heard he had to meet with the ambassador from Spain this morning and show them around, and also there’s a lot to prepare for his wedding with princess Emilié.”

Ann nodded once, staring down at her feet. “Right…the wedding.”

The maid released a long sigh as she slowly approached the sorrowful girl, reaching out to hold her hand. “My dear, I’m very sorry, I know how much you love His Highness.”

“Marina, am I being stupid for loving him?” Ann asked quietly, her voice trembling as if she was on the verge of tears. 

“You’re not the first to fall in love with the Prince,” said Marina. “But…you’re the first he’s fallen in love with. I’ve seen the way he’s always looked at you, and he keeps reminding me to send you nice clothes and fine meals and making sure you stay warm at night.”

Ann looked up to meet her eyes. What the maid had just said should’ve made her feel better, yet it didn’t, not a bit, not at all.

“But, again, His Highness is always going to choose his throne, which also means…the Princess.” Marina gives Ann’s hand a gentle squeeze as she noticed the young girl’s glistened eyes. “If I were you, I wouldn’t build my hopes up so high for it to get shattered down. I know you’re a good person, Ann, and you deserve more than a troublesome life bound by these walls.”

Ann mumbled her gratitude then watched the girl walk out of the room. Soon the door was closed again and she was left alone, again. Edward hadn’t come visit her since last night, after she’d found him and Emilié, his true wife-to-be. Maybe he’d made his choice. 

However, Ann loved him too much to make her own.

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“Hey, Lisa!” Jason smiled when Y/N’s flatmate came to answer the door.

“Hi, kid. What are you doing here?” Lisa raised an eyebrow at him. “She’s on tour with Harry Styles, the love of her life, remember?”

He rolled his eyes and stepped inside before she even intended to invite him in. “I left my notebook in Y/N’s room the other day when I was helping her pack. I come to get it.”

“Okay. Be quick, I’m leaving in five minutes.”

“Five minutes. Got it,” Jason said quickly as he headed straight to Y/N’s bedroom. He’d been here too often so it was like his own place now, but his best friend had never been a tidy person, so to look for something in her room in five minutes only would be quite a challenge.

“Where the hell is it?” grumbled the young man when he searched through the stuff on Y/N’s working desk, which was always disorganized anyway.

By accident, he knocked over a pile of books with his elbow, cursing and bending down to pick it up. It was only then did he discover a brown paperback sketch book which, for some reason, caught his attention before anything else lying on the floor. He picked it up and sat down on the edge of her bed as he opened it. He’d never seen this book before, but he was sure she wouldn’t mind him taking a look for she loved bragging about her masterpieces to him anyway. Jason had always loved seeing Y/N’s artworks; whenever she showed them to him she would go into every detail from her choice of colors to the story behind each sketch and painting. Nevertheless, there was something wrong about these drawings. These weren’t what she normally would draw. 

The first few pages of the book were portraits of familiar strangers, whom Jason could easily recognize, but he never would’ve thought his best friend would know about these people. He flipped fast through the next pages and found some scenes she’d described to him before, those were the scenes from her dreams, she’d been drawing them probably to remember or to try and put two and two together. She wanted to know the answer for them perhaps.

The most recent sketch in the book was of a throne, on which sat a king whose face was blank, which was too creepy for Jason’s taste. On the walls behind the faceless man hung plenty of portraits of royal members without faces as well.

“Hmm…portraits…a palace…a king…” 

Jason widened his eyes when he felt a lightning strike right through his brain. He swiftly flipped back to the first pages of the book. How could he have missed it? The portrait of Edward Rammour in the museum!

Y/N was right to say he didn’t know any celebrity who was still alive, because Jason recognized most of the people in her sketch book. The only thing they had in common, besides the fact that they were all famous and dead, was how much they resembled one another. 

All of them possessed a strikingly identical pair of green eyes.

.

.

.

“Edward, stop!”

The young Prince squeezed his eyes shut when he halted his feet, then turned around to face his mother, the Queen. Her eyebrows were knitted together when she approached him, and without waiting for the young man to speak for himself, she scolded him first, “I can’t believe you called off the meeting to run off to see your lover! That was not how a prince should behave!”

“Mother, I called off the meeting because that man was talking nonsense.”

“That man, was about to offer us powerful warships so whatever nonsense he’s feeding you, you accept, with gratitude!” Said the Queen, shutting Edward up for good. “You need to stop acting like your father and keep it in your pants, for God’s sakes!”

“This is not about Ann, mother.”

“It’s been about her since the day she arrived!” 

Edward didn’t argue this time, so she knew she was right. That girl must have casted a spell on her child, because the son she’d brought up wouldn’t be such a fool for any woman. She didn’t raise him to be like his ignorant father.

“Edward,” she lowered her voice and laid a palm on his face, stroking his cheek gently like she’d always done since he was a baby. “You’re young and I cannot forbid you from lusting for beautiful ladies, but she’s not worth the time. You’re getting married, and you should only be this devoted to your wife and your wife only.”

“I…I’m gonna try to accept the marriage,” he said, almost making her happy. “But I don’t love Emilié, mother. I never will. You told me to follow my heart, right? That’s exactly what I’m doing here. I love Ann, and I want to be with her.”

The Queen did advise him that, but what she meant was him falling in love with a noble, not a girl with no background or title. 

“Edward, you’re hurting both girls by making this decision,” she said, stopping him immediately when he intended to walk away. “Do you think she’s going to stay around while you’re married to another? And what would the people say if they know their King is in love with a peasant?”

“Father sleeps with the whole kingdom and he’s still King, isn’t he?” The question slipped out before Edward could stop himself, leaving him and his mother in utter shock.

He swore he’d never seen her so hurt and disappointed for she didn’t need a reminder of how her husband had never loved her, especially when it was a reminder from her own child.

“I didn’t mean t—“

“Enough.” She raised her voice. “You are coming with me back to the throne hall. We’re having tea with the ambassador.”

“But mother—“

“Either you come, or you can stop calling me mother for good.” With that, she stormed away, leaving the Prince behind with a difficult decision to make. 

Edward thought about Ann and how sad she must have been waiting for him to come visit. He loved her, he truly did, but he also loved his mother, and he couldn’t let her down like his father had always done. Taking a deep breath, letting it out, Edward quickly followed the Queen back to the throne hall, even when his heart was aching to be elsewhere.

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.

.

Y/N knew she was supposed to hand in her resignation form after the show, but then she overheard some girls in Harry’s team gossiping about how she was in love with him and he’d told her no because he was in love with Lillie. They called her by these awful names she couldn’t forget, and they didn’t even know half the story to make such cruel accusations. All those lies made her feel sick and she couldn’t be anymore patient to wait until the show was finally over to get this pain off her chest.

That was why she knocked on the door of his dressing room just fifteen minutes before the show, thinking there was no turning back now that she’d made up her mind; yet the moment she saw him and he smiled at her, she almost forgot why she was there. 

However, she couldn’t allow herself to forget, not this time.

“I quit.”

Harry froze as soon as he heard those two words from his assistant, who was actually handing him her resignation form. This clearly wasn’t a joke.

“Why?”

“Why?” Y/N furrowed her eyebrows at her employer and snorted humorlessly.

That was his response? Just a one-word question without any emotion at all? That was how much she meant to him?

Despite the look of shock on the assistant’s face, Harry seemed rather indifferent to this news, almost as if he didn’t care, which made her wonder,

Does he care?

“Your contract hasn’t ended yet, so if you want to quit you must give me a good reason.”

“It’s all in this form—”

“No. I want to hear you say it.”

Now Y/N had officially lost her patience. She withdrew the paper and held his eye-contact as she spoke loud and clear, “I cannot be around you anymore, Harry, that’s why. Is that a good enough reason for you?”

“And why can’t you?” He raised another question, looking as calm as ever, which drove her insane.

“Are you seriously not letting me quit?”

“You have to answer my question, Y/N.”

She looked at him.

He looked at her.

She didn’t know what he wanted or why he was acting this way. He appeared like he didn’t care whether she left or not, but at the same time he didn’t seem like he wanted to let her go. What exactly was it that he wanted? She wasn’t a psychic, he couldn’t expect her to read his mind!

“Y/N,” Harry broke the silence to remind his assistant he was still waiting for her reply.

Well, if he wanted to know the truth so badly, she would let him. It didn’t matter anymore, because once she’d left this job and gone back home, they would never see each other again. She would never see him again…Though the thought of that made her sad, it was reality, and she needed to accept it, and move on.

“Because…” She took a deep breath. “I think I love you.”

Harry didn’t say anything, just stared at her. Though she wasn’t looking at him, she could feel his eyes burning holes on her face. Y/N wished he would start to speak, he could just laugh at her if he must, at least give her a reaction. His silence right now is slowly killing her.

“Now you know the real reason,” she said because he didn’t. “Can you let me go?”

“Think?” He puckered up his forehead, leaving her surprised. “You’re not sure?”

“Was that all you cared about?!”

“Yes, Y/N, that was all I cared about because I am sure. I love you.”

What?

“I love you,” Harry repeated once again, assuming she didn’t hear it the first time, but she did. She did clearly. She was just bewildered and had no idea how to react and what to believe.

“But you and Lillie—“

“Are over,” he finished that sentence for her, leaving her once again at a loss for words. “I broke up with her that day when she came here. She asked me to do her a favor by letting her team announce our breakup, because you know…Lillie. She’ll probably say she broke up with me, whatever, that doesn’t matter anymore.”

Harry left silence for Y/N to fill in but she remained quiet and kept gazing at him. It was all up to him now. He’d said what needed to be said and she hadn’t stormed out so it was a good sign. He might as well finish this the right way, what he should’ve done along time ago.

“I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone, but I’m telling you now because…” Y/N felt her stomach tighten, and her hands shake, when he took a step forward closing the distance between them. “I don’t want you to leave.”

She had never stand this close to him. She thought she might pass out, hoping she wouldn’t. Their lips were just a few inches apart. So close. Almost…

Is he gonna—

Then her phone started to ring.

“Don’t answer that,” Harry whispered, a frown formed on his face as he stared at her intensely while reaching out for her hands. Y/N, however, recognized the special ringtone so she couldn’t ignore it now.

“It’s my best friend Jason,” she said. She had never neglected any call from Jason. The voice in her head told her this one might be urgent, it hadn’t been wrong lately, which was what she was afraid of. So she withdrew her hands from Harry’s, excusing herself to go outside and answer it.

“I’ll be right back, I promise,” she said before walking out of the door. 

Harry watched her go with a lump in his throat and an ache in the chest which he couldn’t explain, even to himself. What if that moment before the call was the only happy moment they would ever get? What if the promise she made, was the only one she failed to keep for him? 

.

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.

Emilié had no idea why she was requested to come meet the Queen in her garden by the lake. She was specifically told to come alone, so it shouldn’t have been something as simple as discussing a royal ball or her wedding with the Prince, which, by the way, was getting quite close already.

“You would like to see me, Your Majesty?” 

The Queen, whose back was turned to Emilié, didn’t speak, she nodded to signal her two maids to leave her with the Princess, and went on admiring the beautiful red roses she loved so dearly. 

“This is my favorite spot,” she spoke and carefully ran her fingers across a delicate rose petal. “I’ve grown these myself, do you like them, Princess?”

“I do, Your Majesty,” replied Emilié. “But I suppose they’re not the reason you wanted to see me?”

“Well, they are, just not entirely.” The Queen finally turned around to face the young lady. She might not be as youthful as Emilié, but her beauty was doubtlessly timeless. Everyone knew Edward didn’t inherit his beauty from his father, but from his mother, who, unfortunately, was never the King’s favorite woman.

“You see, our people grow a lot of trees and flowers and herbs in this garden. My roses are indeed the most beautiful of all, I’m very proud of them,” the older noble said with a gentle smile. “So tell me, Princess. If our palace was ever under attack, and if you were given a chance, what would you most be likely to save from this garden?”

“The roses, Your Majesty?”

“False,” the answer left the Princess in shock. “The herbs.”

“But you said—“

“The roses are just for presentation. We like to look at them, but we don’t need them, whereas the herbs can be used as remedies for sickness, healing herbs can ease pain and fix wounds.” The Queen took a long pause to study the Princess’ face, and once she was certain Emilié knew where she was heading to, she continued, “You are a rose, beautiful, yet useless. She is a herb, Edward needs her to survive. She’s in charge of his heart, sooner or later, my throne.”

“He cannot make her his Queen, she’s not a highborn.” Emilié laughed wryly, however, deep down inside, losing her title as the future Queen of England was what she’d been afraid of since the moment she’d laid eyes on Ann.

“You foolish child!” The Queen suddenly raised her voice, causing Emilié to flinch in shock. “Edward ran away from everything once and he didn’t have a solid reason then. Now, he’s got her, so if he cannot run away, he’ll make sure she stays by his side, no matter what the cost is.” 

There was something in the Queen’s tone that gave away her fear and worry which she’d tried so hard to cover up. The fear that her one and only son, whose royal blood was running through his veins, was likely to give up his crown for a peasant, with no background or title.

“I raised him. I know how stubborn he can be. Edward would go against God to make that girl his Queen if he wanted to. So as long as I’m alive, I cannot let a dynasty crumble to pieces, just because my son’s wife is an idiot who cannot keep her man.”

Emilié swallowed hard and took a step back once the Queen took a step forward. 

“He promised he would give me a chance…”

“Promises can be broken, like stitches! She’s already sleeping in his bed and you’re here to tell me my son’s future is built upon a promise?”

“I’ll come up with a better plan—“

“No. You’ve done enough,” said the Queen as she raised one hand in the air, telling the girl to shut up and pay attention. “This time you do as I say.”

“What if Edward finds out we’re plotting behind his back? I cannot risk losing his trust again…” 

The Queen released a sigh, for she could see behind the face of a ruthless girl like Emilié was still a fragile heart. She used to be like that, many years ago, soft and weak. Having lived that long and gone through that much damages like she had, the heart, like a rose, would eventually wilt to brown. 

Edward was the only light that kept the Queen’s heart from rotting, and she would do anything, and she meant anything, to make sure her first and only son got to sit on that Throne, unharmed. His desire for the girl named Ann would threaten his claim as well as the French alliance, and if she ever got to become Queen, blood would have to spill. A mother could not standby and watch that happen to her own child.

“Don’t worry, darling,” the Queen said, lifting the Princess’ chin up with one finger. “By this time tomorrow, the girl named Ann will have been long gone.”

.

.

.

Harry was sweating in this suit.

He had never experienced such anxiety before going on stage. He’d been performing in front of a massive audience ever since he was a teenager. He was born for the spotlight, he loved being up there, he loved the sound of the crowd cheering him on. So what was happening here? Why were his palms shaking and why couldn’t he breathe? 

“Kid, are ya alright?” Mitch asked in concern as he saw Harry struggling to even stand on his own two feet. 

Though his headache was killing him, the first thing coming out of Harry’s mouth was, “have you seen Y/N?”

“No, she came to see you earlier, didn’t she?”

“Yes, she did, but then she left to answer a personal call.”

“H, you’re sweating. Are you sure you can go on stage?”

“I’m sure…” he replied, trying to steady his breathing. “I think I’m just nervous.”

Mitch laid his palm on Harry’s forehead, then with a frown, he said, “kid, you’re burning up. You can’t go on stage now.”

“I can,” Harry groaned, eyes squeezed shut, reaching for his friend’s shoulder for support. He didn’t look fine, not at all.

“Don’t be an idiot,” Mitch scolded him while holding his face. “I’m gonna get Jeff alright.”

“Get Y/N...”

“Okay, Jeff and Y/N. You sit here.” Mitch grabbed a stool nearby, pulling it to his side and making Harry sit down on it before telling a guy from their team not to let Harry on stage until he felt better. Everything after Mitch was gone became hazy to Harry. All the sounds were muffled and his sight started to fade. All that was left in his head, was Y/N. 

In the bathroom, down the hall, Y/N was hiding in a stall, sitting on a toilet lit while talking to her best friend, because the loud music from outside didn’t allow her to hear him clearly.

“Hurry up, Jason! I’m late!” Y/N cried out, burying her face into her palm. “This better be important or I won’t ever pick up your calls again!”

“Look, you need to calm down and hear me out! Jesus…just…put me on video.”

“I don’t have time to video chat with you, J.”

“Damn it, just do it!” His response really surprised her. He’d never talked to her like that, so she was taken aback and therefore didn’t hesitate to do as he said immediately. Jason’s face popped up on the screen soon after, he was still sitting at her desk, in her bedroom.

“Wait, are you in the bathroom?” He raised an eyebrow, causing her to squint her eyes in annoyance.

“Just hurry up!”

“Okay, okay, do you know these people?” Jason went straight into the point with a question while showing her drawings on the cam for her to see.

“How dare you look at my—“

“Just answer the question!”

“No! They were just random people I saw in my dreams!” She breathed harshly, confused and offended by his weird behaviors. “What’s wrong with you today, J?! It’s like you’re being possessed.”

Jason ignored that and went on explaining, “these aren’t just people from your dreams, Y/N. They were real people!”

Y/N snorted, though she was a little bit creeped out by her own best friend at this point. “J, I know I’ve told you some weird stuff but—“

“This one is Basilio,” Jason began anyway, pointing to the first portrait in Y/N’s sketch book. “He was a famous British painter in the 17th century who fell in love with a girl named Elia. His family forbad their love and then she died of a terrible disease.” He quickly flipped to the next page. “Jameson Wallace, an 18th century’s writer. In his autobiography, he mentioned his lover Martha who killed herself when he chose to marry another woman, whom he’d been engaged to for two years before he met her.” Then onto the next drawing. “Lewis Reeves, a scientist in the 19th century, already married when he met the love of his life, they had an affair and he died while traveling at sea.” The one after that. “Leon Morrison, an actor in the 20th century, their love story made the papers because she was seventeen and he was twenty-five, they couldn’t be together and he died later in a car crash.”

“But—“ Y/N was almost speechless. She was scared, no, terrified. “Those people couldn’t be real, because…”

“Because you thought they were different versions of Harry that you came up with in your own head?” 

Yes.

“No.”

“Then we all circle back to…this.” Jason ignored his best friend’s denial and moved the phone’s camera to the laptop behind him, on the screen of which was an image of the portrait of the King, the one they’d seen in the art museum, where it all began. “Edward Rammour, King of England in the 16th century, fell in love with a peasant girl who was prosecuted of treason and later on executed.”

No, this can’t be true.

“Remember when you told me how this man’s eyes resembled Harry’s, and you kept seeing them in your dreams? What if it’s not just a coincidence, Y/N?”

This can’t be happening.

“What if they’re all linked together?”

“This…is insane, Jason…” Y/N tried to laugh, but she found no humor in the story. “Tell me this is all a prank you came up with to scare me.”

Jason looked at her, frowning as he shook his head, “I wish I could, Y/N…”

“So you’re telling me these are all…the same person?”

“Not really...Have you ever heard of reincarnation?”

She had. She remembered reading about it somewhere but she didn’t believe it. No sane person would, obviously. 

“Reincarnation is the philosophical or religious concept that an aspect of a living being starts a new life in a different physical body or form after each biological death.” Jason read out loud the information on Wiki and turned back to the cam. Y/N’s head was spinning, still she managed to hear some keywords to understand what he was talking about. 

“Y/N, describe again to me that room you see in every single one of your dream.” 

“Why?”

“Do it.”

She breathed harshly, shutting her eyes to reimagine the scene before her eyes. “Okay, it was in a palace. There was…a high back chair made of a deep dark oak finish with a red velvet cushion…a throne, it sat at the top of a three stepped platform. There were high windows, many tapestries hung from the walls. There were…many paintings…portraits of faceless people…That’s all I can remember.” 

“Like this?” He showed her an image he found online, which was exactly like the room she’d just described. 

“H-How?”

“This is the throne hall in the Rammours’ palace. How do you know the details of a room you’ve never been in, Y/N? The only reasonable explanation is that you have been there before.” Jason looked at her and he was just as frightened as she was, maybe more. “Those dreams you were having weren’t dreams, they were memories from your past lives.”

.

.

.

Everyone in the Kingdom had heard of the King’s reputation. He was everything his son Edward was not. He cared about himself more than his people and had spent most of his time on the throne sleeping with young girls and blaming others for his own failures. Instead of trying to stop crimes, poverty, and hunger, he wasted so much effort and wealth into these terrible witch hunts, for which countless of innocent lives had ended in ashes.

Rumors had it, when the King was still a young prince, a fortune teller told him a woman with magical powers - a witch, would take away everything he loved. She would end his life and also his family name on the throne. He believed her words entirely, so the first thing he did when he became King was to capture every woman whom he suspected to be performing witchcrafts, then have them burnt alive with no mercy.

However, a witch wouldn’t have easily got caught by an imbecile monarch whose heart was as small as his brain. Witches were usually charming and wise and beautiful, and a man like the King would never have harmed or suspected a beautiful lady. 

His lust for Ann had intensified since the day his son brought her to court. The only reason he hadn’t laid a hand on her was because Edward was always by her side. The only person beside himself and Ann that could sense his desire for the young girl was his wife, the Queen. 

“Your Majesty,” a guard announced to the King, who was getting dressed in his chamber by two of his maids. “Princess Emlié is here.”

“Send her in.”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

Emilié entered shortly after with a vibrant smile on her face, the one that would light up every single room. Had she not been his own son’s future Queen, the King wouldn’t have let such an opportunity pass by.

“You’d like to speak to me, Princess?”

“Yes, Your Majesty, but—“ She pursed her lips, looking at his servants. “—Could we speak alone?”

“Don’t mind them. They’re quiet as mice,” the man said and raised his arms so the girl in front of him could button up his shirt. “I’m a busy man, Princess. You’d better not waste my time.”

Emilié straightened her back and cleared her throat. She couldn’t let anxiety talk her out of this. “It’s…It’s about the girl named Ann living in this palace, Your Majesty.”

“What about her?”

“Well…She’s a dear friend of my future husband, your son, Edward, and we are very close to each other. She’s told me that she…she had a desire for…you, Your Majesty.”

The King froze at once, then held up his hand to tell his maids to step aside. The Princess stood with her head hung low as the monarch approached her. His broad-shouldered figure towering over her, leaving her hands trembling on her sides.

“Is this true?”

“Yes, Your Majesty. And I’ve noticed the way you’ve always looked at her, so I told her that you might feel the same, and she was very happy.”

“Was she now?” 

Emilié nodded, then finally looked up at the older man, faking a smile. “She will be waiting for you at midnight, in your library, if you are interested.”

There was a long pause in the conversation. The King probably needed a little bit time to think about the offer, but of course, he couldn’t say no to it.

“Tell lady Ann, I’ll be there.”

“She’d be thrilled to hear that, Your Majesty.” Emilié bent her knees and gave the King one last smile before making her way out of his chamber. Her heart was beating like a drum, yet there was a strange kind of liberation inside of her. She’d thought she would feel so remorseful for doing the thing that she’d done, but now, revenge actually made her feel…alive. 

.

.

.

“So I was all of those dead girls, and Harry was all of those dead guys?”

“Y-yeah…” Jason nodded fast. “Jeez, it sounds creepy when you put it that way.”

Y/N hated how her best friend sneaked in a joke in every situation, including ones like this. She ignored him and continued, “okay so…if that’s true. Then why did it only happen to Harry and I, and not…you…or Lisa! Or anyone else for that matter!”

“Okay, my theory…” He tapped a finger on his lip, forehead crinkled from thinking too hard. “The witch, well, the first you, got angry because Edward didn’t stop her execution, so she cursed him to never find love again?”

“Then she would curse him to die in every lifetime, but that wasn’t the case wasn’t it? You told me there was that girl who killed herself, one died from a disease? I mean, why would you curse your own self in the after life to die? Unless this witch me really sucked at being a witch.”

“Okay, you’ve got a point, so it wasn’t her who cursed him.” Jason rested his chin on his knuckles on blew air from his mouth from frustration. 

“Yeah, I refuse to believe the first Harry would agree to kill the first me, I mean, he might not be Harry but he was still…Harry. And Harry’s too kind...” She bit on her bottom lip, holding back another sigh as she mumbled to herself, more like a realization then a wild guess, “maybe he was just late. He couldn’t save her.” 

Jason noticed the way Y/N kept her head down and he intended to ask her what she was thinking of. He didn’t need to though, it was her who spoke first, “so what will happen in this life then?” Her voice was trembling because she was truly afraid. “Is either of us going to die?”

That, Jason had no answer for. He wished there was anything he could do to find out, to protect her, but he knew as much as she did, maybe less. He couldn’t be her hero, not in this story.

“I…don’t know…but that was how it went, right? They died because they fell in love.”

It took Y/N a moment.

“No…” Her eyes widened as she discovered something. “They died because they tried to get together. They all met at the wrong time, one was either taken, engaged, forbidden by their family or too old and too young for each other…But Harry and I, we’re different.”

“He’s got a girlfriend, Y/N!”

“He told me he broke up with her, J! He told he loved me right before you called.”

“He…he did?” Jason didn’t know how to feel about this, but he’d got a bad feeling because it wouldn’t be this easy. He didn’t want to tell her that though, she looked so much happier, he couldn’t put out the hope in her eyes.

“Yeah, this is a good sign right?” She smiled, exhaling all at once. “Maybe we’re an exception! Maybe it’ll all work out in this lifetime!”

“Y/N, I think—“

Suddenly, Jason was interrupted by a voice from the other side of the door. “Y/N, are you in there?”

“Sarah?” Y/N spoke up, giving Jason a look before standing up from the toilet lit.

“Oh God, there you are! Everyone’s been looking for you. Are you alright in there?”

“Yeah, I’m on the phone…” Y/N answered honestly, but she couldn’t help but notice how frantic her friend sounded. “What is it, Sarah?”

“Harry…” There was a pause, as if Sarah couldn’t find a proper way to deliver this news, or maybe she didn’t want to be the one to do this. It took her a few seconds to finally complete that sentence, knowing it would crush Y/N.

And, it did.

“Harry…Harry’s in the hospital, Y/N.”

[demolitonlcvers]

I found this note on my phone called “My Emo Dreams” and I can’t stop laughing

My Emo Dreams

What is my brain

Ok so I just had a really weird dream that it was Halloween and I was at this "museum" with my parents and my friend Magnolia. We went into the museum and there was a little kids room and we were in there when one kid started chasing the rest of us and we were terrified bc as soon as she touched someone, they turned into an exact replica of her, and so the remaining kids ran and I ended up right in front of a hall of these kids, like ten of them. They saw me and I ran, ending up at this weird playground thingy. Only one of them was still chasing me, and I avoided her like a badass. I found my dad and my uncle at this concert and the people on stage were obviously these clone things. I told my dad and he believed me for some reason. Then again, it's a dream. I went back to the museum to find my mom but couldn't and needed a car, and I saw a group of people in costume. And Brendon Urie was one of them. Which is weird cause I live in Pennsylvania and he lives in Vegas or something? Anyway, I was chasing him like a deranged fangirl or something (which I am tbh), and he tripped over a trash can, and I told him about the clone people. For some reason, he, too, believed me, and I ended up getting a ride from Brendon to get my mom?

What is my brain I mean

But I got to meet Brendon Urie in the dream sooooo...

I had this other dream where I was with Tyler Joseph but I don’t remember it well

Ok so I had another dream this time it was "the Hat Fic" (which I'm never going to read btw) but instead it was this fanfic about Fall Out Boy in which Pete has to kill the other members for some reason

I had another dream where I lived with Dan and Phil and there were unicorns and a girl wearing a Fall Out Boy shirt And I opened the door to the house I lived in with Dan and Phil and they were like "what do you see" and I said "Phan" (even though I don't ship it that much) which freaked them out And then I woke up

I had a dream that I was with a group of killjoys and I had to save the original killjoys and we did and there were people shooting at us but when party poison appeared they were like “oh no it’s party poison” and backed up and then another party poison appeared and we were like “WhO iS tHe ReAl PaRtY pOiSoN??!?” And there were little children and they figured out that the first one was the real one even though his uniform was all messed up but you know the other ones jacket was white and literally said “DeAd pegAsUS” so yeah So we were walking out with party poison and I was like hi party poison and I looked at him and what did I see? THIS KID IN MY GRADE IN A RED WIG WTF

So I’ve had three dreams about warped tour in the past three days and here they are

Don’t remember it that well but my best friend was there and we walked around but it was before anything actually started and I think it was in a library

We saw Falling In Reverse (my best friend was also there) and we were in like the front row and it was great

For some reason the entire family decided to show up and we were eating at a restaurant and we had my dog and my mom was like “go take him to the dog park thing and then hang out with your friends” so I took the dog to the dog park thing but all the dogs were wayyyy bigger than him and so I was like “lol no” and carried him back and he turned into a loaf of bread so I ate the loaf of bread and gave one little piece to my mom and she was like “where’s the dog” and I said “lol what do you think that bread was” and then my dad and my brother got into an argument about whether or not the dog was still alive

I had another dream about warped tour even though its been a few weeks basically I went to warped tour with Sarah and we met Palaye Royale and for some reason they decided to hang out with us so we were like lol sure so we just walked around and talked to Palaye Royale for a few hours fun

I had another dream that I saw Panic! again and Dallon was still there and Brendon flew right over me during Dying in LA. Also my friend Tori was there and I was texting my other friend about it the entire time and then later I went to visit him and then I woke up

I had another dream where we were at a school thing and Gerard Way was there but it was 2017 Gerard Way and he was doing a signing/meet and greet and I got too scared to talk to him but then later he came up to me and we talked a little bit and then the head of the school talked to me, my best friend, and some other girl about making a bi club and I would have to make the promotional video so yay

I had another dream that it was warped tour (I’ve had like five of these smh I’m still not over it) anyway I saw As It Is with my best friend and then met Patty Walters which was pretty cool. And then later I ended up in a school bus and part of a horror movie (????) and then when I got out of that I got wrapped up in this car washing thing for school cause Fall Out Boy was there and Pete started spraying me with a giant hose so I got mad and slapped his car. And then finally I got out of the car washing thing but I got lost and had to help this old guy and watched a few episodes of some show about animated fish. And then I finally got back to warped but Palaye’s set was over and their meet and greet was also almost over. So I got at the end of the line and talked to Emerson for a really long time and hugged Sebastian for like a minute straight and it was fun.

So I’ve had two dreams about Hot Topic:

The first one I just walked in and I’m pretty sure they had a bunch of like comforters and bedsheets for sale??? And then I walked down this really creepy staircase to this underground room which was huge and full of records and posters and stuff and I had a lot of fun.

So I had another one just the other day that the mall near my house was closing so me and two of my friends decided to walk around for the last time and we found the Hot Topic and the inside was kinda empty but the outside had all the band merch. We went inside and Awsten Knight was there and he was like “hi I’m going to draw on you” to one of my friends and started drawing on her so we were all sitting together and I talked about warped and Awsten was like “oh cool you saw me at warped have a free poster or two OR THREE give them to your friends” and I was like “thanks” and then he said “no thank you, little teenager Awsten is quaking” and I was like “ohhhh”

I had another dream that I was at this camp thing and Beyoncé was there and me and my best friend went to this other thing with Hayley Kiyoko and she hugged Hayley really awkwardly and then Tom Holland appeared and it turned out there was this like claw machine that lets you pick out celebrities at any age and two kids were playing with it and they brought out 8 year old Frank Iero and he was really mean and hated me for no reason and also highkey looked like a vampire

I had ANOTHER dream about warped Jesus Christ I need to stop Anyway I was on a tower with a bunch of people from school and watching the main stage from there and mcr was the last band playing and Remington was there and he climbed on the stage and they played Surrender the Night and closed with Burn Bright which is cool

I had a dream that I saw Paramore and I was like right in the front and Hayley kept making eye contact with me and then there was an intermission and panic! played and it was a fun time

Why am I like this what has the internet done to me

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 17.10.17 lb

heyyyyy, palindrome date! ^^^ 

also, is2g there better be a lot of rikara today to make up for yesterday’s fuckery or imma flip. 😣😣😣

ugh what is this fuckery???? like flying coach isn’t unbearable enough already without a bunch of obnoxious qawwals and their ghissi pitti shayari. I JUST WANT SILENCE AND LEG SPACE TILL I REACH MY DESTINATION OK?!?!?!

the most unrealistic thing about this set here is the amount of leg space between the seats btw. the only person who i know who flies coach comfortably is my mom, and she’s barely 5 feet tall on a good day. 

shivaay be like “economy class. never again. in fact commercial air travel never again. never not taking the private jet. i’m not meant for this peasantry.” 

ANIKA STOP DRAWING ATTENTION TO YOURSELF YOU IDIOT

damn this lady qawwal be forward af. give me her confidence. 

“i’m not majnu. i’m shivaay singh oberoi.” pffffffffffffffft. 

ok shivaay, literally no one gives a fuck about your philosophy about love rn when you haven’t even bothered telling your wife where you’re going. excuse me if i’m not swooooning, even if your dumbass wife is in the background there. 

ANIKA PUT THE NIQAB BACK ON YOU IDIOT 

lmao her pride on “her asar” on him tho. 

“mere majnu hai!” haha awwwwwwwwww

jennifer is me. i am jennifer. i wish i drank - it would make it so much easier to get through the day. 

jenny’s pissed at shivaay for walking up and down the aisles like it’s his baap ka plane and i don’t blame her one bit. 

bua - don nonsense. 

aaaaaaaaand anika’s seen bua. 

and bua’s seen anika. oufffff. 

lol anika’s switching seats as though this be a local bus. 

OUFF MORE BUA DON. CAN WE NOTTTTTTTTTTT!??! 

hahaha shivaay sits down to discover begumjaan as seatmate. 

“aap se seedha tum pe utar aaaya miyaan? ajnabi potti ke saath aisa tu-tadaa kaiko hona???” “ajnabiii???? realllllly????? 😒😒😒” 

one - surbhi really honing the hyderabadi urdu she got from bobby jasoos waala tiny role. and two - hubs bhi chodne waale nahi hai now that he’s gotten her cornered. 

snorttttt, she’s sooooo annoying and doing fulllll on ungli. 

“tumhare chauffeur.... SHOHAR allow karte hai kya?” 

lol like she needs YOU to allow her to do anything. 

“enough anika!” “aniSa begum! aniSAAAA!” “naam badalna hi tha toh kuch aur rakh leti, apna hi naam ulta karne se kya hota hai?” “jaldi jaldi mein aisa hi hota hai. 😣😣😣”

pfffffffffffffffft, anikaaaaaaaaaaaa. 

lmao shivaay is so fucking doneeeeeee with this terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day already. and it’s jusssssssssssst getting started. 

ooooh challenge. he’s gonna make her admit it’s her. this is gonna be funnnnnnnnnnn. and she’s like I’LL NEVER ADMIT IT. 

god nakuul looks so exhausted in the close ups. someone give the man some b6/b12 or something. 

i knewwwwwwwwww it. i knew she’d be terrified at take off! 

haaye. babies. warming my cold dead heart. 😭😭😭😭💖💖💖

YAS. DILPREET. MY BABY. I HAVE REASON TO LIVE.

ok omki’s purana waala socialist-communist side is coming out. 

but alsooooooo violent oberoi side. yikes.

“tussi vi nahi jande main kaun hoon ji.” 

more like mera bhai kaun hai but ok. 

so this “sardar naal panga” thing is a recurring thing here to stay huh? 

LMAO I RELATE WITH JENNIFER’S FRUSTRATION LEVEL SO MUCH, IT’S NOT EVEN FUNNY. 

ok fwding this bua nonsense. FUCKING GIMME MORE SHIVIKA/RIKARA IN THAT TIME. UGH. 

patidev ke dimaag ke phurze ghooming to make wife admit.  

ooooooh. tobasco. he’s allergic, remember? 

why do i know this shit????? i barely know what *i’m* allergic to. wtf is my life even, lord. 

god these two idiots are so ridiculoussss. ek hai ki he’s willing to ingest an allergen to break her, and doosri hai ki she’s gonna do something extra af to stop him without breaking. 

this maaaaaaaa is so fucking useless. i hate her so much. i need her to DIE. now. 

oh omkiiiiii you’re such a bad liar. and you talk waaaaaaaaaay too much as dilpreet. 

but you’re so stinking cute i can’t even. ugh. so cute. *pulls your cheeks* 

since when is omki suchhhhhhhhhhh a believer in god? matlab, itna drastic change from naastik, so quickly?? 

girl you’re staring at his face and... like... i just can’t. IT’S THE SAME FACE AS YOUR HUSBAND!?!? IT’S NOT EVEN LIKE AWAIII KE IDHAR UDHAR KE SIMILARITIES. IT’S THE EXACT SAME FACE. 

LMAO HIS PANICKED YELLING AT THINKING IT’S A RAKHI HAHAHAHA

ok based on whattttt is this “sabse achcha dost” - you’ve known him 48 hours. 48 hours. it takes me more time than that to decide on whether i should buy a pair of shoes i saw at the mall. 

ok but then gauri always moves on fast fwd. omki ko pati bhi maan liya tha, in like 3.43 minutes. yeh toh at least 2 din le liye dosti ke liye. 

awwwww he’s all weepy and emotional at being considered a friend. ouff, this man and his redemptionnnnn. my hearttttttttttttt. i wanted to hate him some moreeeeeeeeeee. 

meanwhile this fucker is about to kill himself... 

great. don bhi ghus gaya in dono ke beech mein. bas iski kami thi. 

“she’s my wife ok, she’s anika!” “ya allah, yeh daadi waala pottta mere peeche hi pad gaya!”

lololololol

ummmmmmmmm why did anika just randomly attack sundari bua? what the fuck even. ouffffff. 

ok dilpreet calm the f down with the gauri praise, you looking hella thirsty. 

ugly has put nazar on gauri and omki’s pati waale ghanti are ringinggggggg. 

DAT JAW CLENCH THO. 

oh ugly is ladke ka bhai. 

may we all be blessed with a man like dilpreet in our lives who fucks up men who leer at women with luchi tuchi gandiiii nazarein. 

WHY IS BHAVYA STILL STANDING???? DID HE NOT BUY HER A SEAT???? YOU’RE REQUIRED TO BUY HER A SEAT, RUDRA!!!!!

“babyyyyy i need some actionnnn.” 

may we all have baby’s confidence in demanding action when we want it. 😉😉😉

oufff nonsense naach gaana. fwding. 

OK WTF SHE JUST FELL DANCING INTO THE COCKPIT AND PRESSED SOME RANDOMASS LEVER WHAT EVEN IS THIS SHOW MY GOD I ACTUALLY FEEL MY BRAIN CELLS DYING WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF

*DEEEEEEEEEEEEP BREATHS AND VISUALIZES OMKI AND ABHAY’S FACES TO REMIND MYSELF WHY I DO THIS* 

where’s abhay today? i miss his cuteass face.

gauri’s more dressed up than the bride. why does richa look so pheeeeki??? 

ugly ko kya aitraaz hai ab? 

pffffffffft. cheap tactics. dafaaaa ho, ugly. 

UGH UGLY YOU’RE SO CREEPY. I HATE YOU. 

LET GOOOOOO OF HER CREEEEEEP. 

also sardar ka sar ghoooom raha hai. ab dangal hoga! 

aaaaaand those weirdass diamond teeth of bua’s are in... shivaay’s pockets???? great. he’s gonna be caught for fucking smuggling now. GOD. 

lmao whut, india doesn’t even have an air marshal system!!!!!!!! 

WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS THIS PLANE WAAALA PLOT MAN I CAN’T EVEN ISSE ACHCHA TOH ABHAY AUR TANYA KA CHUTIYAAPA DIKHAATE

every time they show maaaaaaaa, my bp goes up by 10 points. i hate her so much. useless woman. 

isn’t this golden dupatta gauri’s wearing pilfered from anika’s ghatiya shaadi waala wardrobe?? 

OK HANDS OFF, UGLY!!!! 

lol omkiii’s sidelines waala glaring. 

wow, ugly has the power to undo dori by just staring. like joey could undo a bra by just looking at it! amaze! 

justtttt like in ipkknd, i don’t even get why this is such HAWWWWWWW waala issue. waise saara ka saara outfit is backless, yeh choti si dori kaunsi izzat bacha rahi thi??? awaiii ke “sanskaari” chonchle.

wow omki, that was not smoooth at alllllllllll. like, you coulda done that with some more finesse???

but fuck me over my trash heart loves this trope to the high heavens. i do i do i do. give me allllllllllllll the dori scenes! 😫😫😫😫

mental note: go read @vishwaspur ka seskkkky waala fic again. 

LMAO HIS ANGRY SHOULDER SHIMMYING IN THE BG WHILE GLARING AT UGLY 😂😂😂😂😂

oh boyyyyyy is it about to be a dance off???? #teamDilpreet

HAHAHA HE ACTUALLY GAVE HIM THE I’M WATCHING YOU GESTURE. PFFFFT SUCH ALPHA MALE NONSENSE. 

WHAT NEXT OM, YOU GOING TO PEE AROUND HER? 🙄🙄🙄

oh. back to murder foursome and shukla. 

lmaoooo how conveniently shukla slipped back into a coma to avoid answering abhay’s questions. amazing tactic. i should try this sometime. 

ugh. ugly’s cornering gauri again and fucking maaaaaaaaaaaaa just dragged omki away. 

fuck you maaaa, you can’t do anything right!!!!! 

HEY UGLY, CAN YOU NOT SEE HER MANGALSUTRA???? LIKE???? 

wait??? he knows???? WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU, FREAK???? WHY IS EVERYONE IN THIS SHOW TOTALLY COOL WITH POLYGAMY?????? 

god this is suchhhh a nonsensical situation. as is all of this stupid show and alllllllll the plotlines right now. but you know me.... 

[reddiess]

[stan_the_man messaged you]

For the anon who wrote:  "stenbrough social media/college au where person A is an instagram model and person B is a fan who has a friend that forces them to follow and comment, and !! person A notices him!!!!" i’m so sorry something was wrong with the connection so i either didn’t post it or deleted it but shoot me a message if you liked it op! you can also find this on my AO3 Requests are open, shoot me a prompt for a fic or headcanon!! Summary:  Stanley Uris has an undying crush on Instagram model Bill Denbrough. Which is fine, until Richie Tozier goes and messages him. * The moment Stanley Uris spots his best friend with his phone in his hand, suspiciously only tapping once on the screen and with purpose, is the moment he knows Richie Tozier is fucking dead. "Richie," he draws the word out as if to question his friend's entire existence. "What are you doing with my phone?" The traitor looks up and has the audacity to smile innocently, like he doesn't know what Stanley is talking about. "Um... Nothing?" "Nothing my ass," Stan murmurs under his breath before sizing the situation up and jumping into action. He throws himself over the back of their leather couch but Richie is already out of the living room, wheezing as he bolts towards the kitchen door. Stan stops and crosses his arms in front of his torso, waiting for the inevitable— CRASH! He watches with perverse satisfaction as his flatmate trips over the ironing board standing in the entrance to the kitchen, toppling to the floor. "There's something in the way," he deadpans. "Watch out."

"Fucking bitch." Richie pushes himself up. Somehow, there's still an unnerving grin splitting his frog face in two. "I still messaged him though."

Stanley's eye twitches. "Who exactly, again?" He stomps over to the monster he calls his best friend and rips his phone out of his hand. "WHAT THE FUCK!"

*

DING!

stan_the_man followed you

DING!

stan_the_man mentioned you in a comment: @billyboy boi fuk me up u fiiiiiiine

Bill Denbrough's eyebrows draw together in confusion, his stare almost piercing holes into the touchscreen of his phone; what kind of language...?

DING!

stan_the_man messaged you: dam boi are u a pair of ray bans bc ud look great sitting on my face ;);););)

The line is so out of the blue and bizarre that Bill actually bursts out laughing. He sits up and quickly screenshots the ridiculous message to send to the groupchat with his closest friends.

Out of pure curiosity he clicks on stan_the_man's profile and is surprised to find that the guy looks fairly normal – handsome, even – and not at all creepy like he would've expected. There's also no trace of the attitude or the, um, grammar he used in his direct message to Bill. He actually just looks like a regular guy who's nice and hot and therefore way out of Bill's league.

He goes back to the direct message to type in a reply but changes his mind pretty quickly. Should he even address something as childish and weird as this message? Should he even...

DING!

He almost drops his phone in surprise.

stan_the_man: Oh God, sorry. That was my roommate, this is so embarrassing. He thinks he's funny.

No emojis, no pickup lines. But at least the guy has good grammar. That's more than what he normally sees on Instagram these days.

*

Stan tries to forget all about the most embarrassing event of his life, also known as the time Richie dm'd his Instagram crush with a godawful fuckboy one-liner. He doesn't unfollow Bill Denbrough though because why would he?

He does still spend a good majority of his free time stalking the guy's profile. What can he do when Bill is literally perfect with all his black and white photoshoots and colorful model shots in European countries and mirror selfies with his dog? What is Stan supposed to do, ignore it? Yeah well, not today - and not only because he's a photography major and the shots make his heart weep but also because Bill is ridiculously perfect.

So here's the brief story of how he found the guy: He was exhausted after a long day of work and was in search of a movie stupid enough for his mushy brain to absorb. In this state of mind, a person's brain capacity is not exactly at its full potential, and so that's his excuse for clicking on a Buzzfeed article titled "21 Hottest Male Models We Shamelessly Follow On Instagram". Go figure.

All of them were hot, of course. But Bill Denbrough was... something else. All Stanley could think about was photographing him. Most of the models were these muscly, handsome machos with chiseled jawlines and messy hair - your typical, well, douchebag look. None of them were Stan's type by far, so he was ready to close the article but then he saw number 21, Bill Denbrough aka @billyboy. Bill was... stunning, to say the least. For starters, he didn't have any facial hair, one point for him. He was not buff, more of a tall and lean type, another point. Not the average face that's considered universally attractive but more of a unique charm and he seemed to have a dog; more points. His bio said:

Bill Denbrough 23yr old model based in New York, loves dogs, books, nature and tv shows. Advocate for LGBTQ+ and homeless youth. For business inquiries, please contact...

His pictures all matched with his bio, Stan realized as he scrolled through his profile. He really was a dog and nature lover, liked to read and was actively helping the LGBT and homeless youth - infinite points and there went Stanley Uris' heart.

So that was then. Now is now, and now... Stan is getting a message from him.

What!?

Stan clears his cache, force stops and restarts the Instagram app and cold boots his phone but it's still there:

billyboy: Haha, no problem man. I know a lot about annoying roommates. I like your work btw!

What. The. Fuck. He doesn't know if he should smack Richie or kiss him.

stan_the_man: Wow, thank you! I'm a photography & imaging major so they're mostly my assignments, but some of them are just for fun. Are you still studying?

Lame, but kind of okay. Acknowledged Bill's compliment, gave a bit of insight related to the topic, asked to show he's also interested in having a conversation. That's normal, right? He waits a couple of minutes before sending it just so he doesn't seem desperate but gets a reply almost instantly.

billyboy: Yeah, I'm studying creative writing, it's my last year though. Can't wait to be out of uni tbh.

stan_the_man: same, I'd sell my soul at this point for it to be over

Bill laughs, or at least sends a laughing emoji so Stan guesses he does. That's how he starts talking to his Instagram crush.

*

It doesn't help much with his crush, talking to Bill. If anything, it makes him like the guy even more, which in turn just makes his heart hurt when he thinks about how he doesn't have a chance. Sometimes he has a flicker of hope, like when Bill says something especially flirty or compliments his new picture. He doesn't post many selfies but the one he does Bill ends up commenting on ("What a handsome curly man #crying") and Stanley ends up gaining 300 followers overnight.

And his infatuation with the model just keeps growing and growing. He's certain Bill is not perfect, he can't be but what can a man do when it sure seems like he is? Stan has no chance. So he does the stupidest thing he can do and invites him out for coffee. As soon as he sends the message he throws his phone across the room, the childhood habit of biting his fingernails making a short but threatening return. Get your act together, Stanley thinks. He's just a guy.

He's Bill Denbrough, he's not just some guy! His mind helpfully supplies.

You're arguing with yourself again. Stop it.

I do whatever I w--

DING!

That has to be Bill. It has to be. Stan carefully rounds his bed and reaches for his phone, pushing the home button so he sees his lockscreen. The preview of Bill's message starts with Sure! When are you... and then it's cut off.

Stanley looks around to see if Richie is in hearing distance, and when he finds he's in the clear, he does a dance of celebration.

He really should give a present of gratitude to Richie now.

*

It goes well. Coffee, that is. They hit it off right away because as normal as Bill comes through in his messages, his humour actually aligns with Stan's in that dry, passive aggressive, death loving kind of way. Which is fine. Amazing.

What's not amazing however, is how perfect he actually is. Stan sees his clear skin and perfect hair and amazing body proportions and red lips every day on Instagram but it has nothing on the real thing. There's just no way any camera could ever capture the charisma the guy has.

(Stanley is going to try though. Even if Bill wouldn't have agreed to it, he would somehow bribe him into modeling for his portfolio. He did agree though, and without any extra convincing too so Stan is going to make the most of that promise.)

It turns out that Bill's favorite tv show is Supernatural, bless his soul, but his favorite movie is Edward Scissorhands, which Stan also loves. They also realize they go to the same university and actually took a course together last semester – some bullshit class where attendance wasn't mandatory – except Stan never realized it. Bill traveled a lot last year due to his modeling career and Stan literally never was there so there was little to no chance of them meeting; which is nice because he would have had an aneurysm on the spot.

When he gets home that afternoon Richie is already sitting in the armchair in their living room with crossed legs.

"I see you've had a fun day," he waves his phone at Stanley, who has to squint to see that Bill has uploaded the selfie they took together to his Instagram.

"None of your business," Stan replies and automatically turns to leave. Well, he would if Richie Tozier didn't jump on his back the next second and really, how is he that fast?

"Tell me EVERYTHING Stan the man, don't you even think about sparing me any juicy details!" Richie booms in his ear before he manages to shake him off enough that only his arms remain locked around Stan's neck. "Come oooon, I hooked you guys up!"

"What the fuck do you mean you hooked us-" DING! "Excuse me, I have to go." He unceremoniously bites Richie in the forearm until he has no chance to let go with a yelp.

"At least tell me later!" his best friend shouts after him but he's already halfway to his room. He plops down onto the light blue bedsheets he changed just yesterday, and the faint smell of the detergent kind of reminds him of how Bill smelled when they half-hugged while saying goodbye.

billyboy: Thank you for the coffee today! I actually have a confession to make.

billyboy: Tell me if I got the wrong message or anything but I had a very hard time not kissing you after we met. I just thought it would be fair to tell you.

Stan turns so his face mushes into the pillow and screams.

*

("When were you going to tell me this?!" Richie shouts, pushing his phone screen into Stan's face. "HUH?"

It's a picture Bill took on campus of them kissing - he uploaded it onto his Instagram story which in turn spiked hundreds of fans to raid Stanley's DM's – mostly with positivity – and Richie to, apparently, have a mental breakdown.

"Just die," Stan replies, pushing the oversized phone out of his face, but he is smiling. "I was going to tell you later, maybe when we're not in the library? You're making a lot of noise."

He's pretty sure he can see Richie's face turn purple with how much he's trying not to scream.

He is going to buy him a present, don't worry. But for now, he has to work on his assignment so he can go meet his boyfriend.)

[koumikoumikoumi]

Kyousei review!

Almost 2 weeks after the premiere I finally mustered the courage to put my conflicting thoughts in text form. This will be a light review of the movie, no questions or meta will be included (I save those for separated posts to ease discussion). Ok, let’s go!

- First minutes were okay, nothing happened that we didn’t know before. The bird scene was creepy and I felt bad for the birdie (later in the movie I felt bad for the scared Meicoomon).

- Taichi saves Meiko (it’s okay, Yamato can’t always be the one to jump in)

- what the hell are you doing with that??? creepy lunatic Himekawa.

- Meicoomon really is a Digimon, phew!

- SHE HAS WHAT IN HER? oh sheeeet

- I’m gonna say it: everything Hackmon says makes total sense to me. I’d do the same if I was Homeostasis.

- It was funny seeing the children fall from disappearing cliffs.

- Eh.

- Really nice drawing! Because that’s what this is. No animation, just some splendid still-image.

- ........ I really should stop caring.

- By this time, the thought of this being pure ship tease occurred to me. (plus, WHAT A BRUTE GEEZ!!!!!)

- Look at this whiny baby! Papa JOUUUUU to the rescue

- In the cave, Meiko doubts about herself (understandable) and everyone talks about bonds between partners. She then doubts about being Meicoomon’s partner and why she was chosen (also understandable).

- Nice Butterfly instrumental while talking about partners and bonding. Hikari makes a nice empathic speech about being okay to be weak sometimes and ask for help.

- Stupid!Agumon interrupts. I can’t stand this guy in Tri.

- Hikari urges Meiko to believe in Meicoomon and to go save her (along with everyone). Meiko is still holding back and I really don’t get why.

- Hackmon serves Daigo some tea and calls him useless. I don’t 100% agree with him here but I’m a fan of this savage!

- Back in the real world, Taichi grabs Meiko’s hand to run because reasons.

- ?????????? what.was.this

- Jyou talking about his school record being stained! I love JOUUUUU

- Daigo presents himself with his full title position and I lost it x)

- “TAICHI WHY WON’T YOU DO ANYTHING”

- Meiko feels bad about herself and doubts about her role (again!). Everyone throws some more “partners and bonds” talk at her (this is getting annoying). Then they talk about hope, Takeru says nothing (okay then...?) and Meiko ignores them all.

- Takeru’s actually too busy asking the questions everyone should be asking. Koushiro suddenly remembers he has a brain capable of asking/answering questions and comes up with the idea of Meicoomon being a switch to make other digimon evil.

- Everyone dwells on it for a moment until they remember they’re hungry. They don’t seem to worry about this anymore for the rest of the movie.

- GHOST STORY TIME

JOUUUUU

- Yamato being scared of ghosts doesn’t fit my HC, but it was fun. Especially the air bass thing!

- More Meichi moments. Meiko keeps blaming herself but Taichi has had enough (at this point I have too). Agumon steps in and talks about liking Meicoomon without really knowing her. This makes no sense but it’s effective and Meiko finally cries.

- Meicoomon appears, DIGIVOLUTION FEST that I really enjoyed.

- JESMON AWESOME APPEARANCE.

- Everytime this guys comes up I get excited! Awesome voice actor btw.

- Fairy!Mimi!!!

- I remember Garudamon carrying the children in her hands....... oh well.

- Homeostasis possesses Hikari. Her saying there should never be sacrifices is rather laughable. And calling Homeostasis selfish is just the icing on the cake! Still, points for trying not to be a vessel anymore and standing up for what she believes.

- Man, I love him.

- In the DW follows a battle which no one really understands.

*SCREECHES IN EXCITEMENT*

- This is my favourite scene in the whole movie.

- Meanwhile things get heavy in the DW and Meiko asks the children to kill Meicoomon. I won’t lie, her words affected me a bit. The music is awesome too.

- TAICHI WHY WON’T YOU DO WHAT I WANT YOU TO. THAT IS TO ACT WHEN NEEDED, BUT OBVIOUSLY NOT NOW.

Jokes aside, Yamato getting angry when Taichi agrees to do something he himself punched him for a few years ago is ironic. Dude needs a chill pill and some of his old personality back.

- Meiko thanks them and starts running to Meicoomon. I swear to god!

- Everything falls apart and Daigo jumps to help Taichi. I think I’m starting to agree with Hackmon.

- Then Hikari gets possessed and Koushiro looks at his computer as if he knows exactly what is happening.

- Awesome moment when Ophanimon FM is born. Sadly we only got 1 min of her and then chaos ensued. Great nostalgia soundtrack.

- Ew and Wow and OMG, all at the same time. (why does she have legs when she definitely can’t walk with them!?)

- THE MUSIC. HELP MEEEEEE

- My babies are cute ^-^ apart from that, THE FEELS.

- New goggle boy is born but I’m sad he didn’t show any emotions. Same for catatonic Hikari, it goes according to my HC but I was expecting something different from her. Maybe next movie.

So yeah. I was expecting more answers, meaningful battles and a better pacing. Also, more Ophanimon FM and a thrilling Hikari part. But overall I liked it!

[itsybitsylemonsqueezy]

Gotham 4x03: A Liveblog

It’s that time of the week again. Hoo boy. I have a sneaking suspicion my son gets thawed this episode and... PHEW, body is not ready. But, here we sure go.

TL;DR - Why.

Question: why does Arabia 125 A.D. look like an edgy production of Les Miz? Just saying

Into the Resurrection Pond! Because... y’know... that’s a thing. That is... Clearly how resurrecting is done. It all totally makes sense now

What is this, divine amniotic fluid? Also why are his clothes gone? He definitely had clothes when he went in. Why did the pond dissolve his clothes but heal his body? ...wut?

I... I don’t... old guy, you’ve explained officially nothing. Nothing here makes sense. What the fuck.

We have a fancy sword now, that’s ALL I’m taking away from this.

BTW, this is a show about Batman

I wonder what the mysterious crates Penguin’s shipping contain

Meanwhile in... Spain? Mexico? Is this what Falcone meant when he said “a place down South”? I thought he meant like... fucking Jersey, not south of the border XDDD

Anyway, meanwhile Jim is here in this tonal departure of a location to get his head shot off

Oh jesus fuck and there’s ALREADY ANOTHER LOVE INTEREST? FUCK EVERYTHING. WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS, ALWAYS STUBBORNLY, OBSESSIVELY SHUNTING JIM INTO EVERY HETERO SHIP THAT COMES ALONG? I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHO SHE IS, SHE’S JUST SOME CHICK RIDING A HORSE, BUT GIVEN THE WAY THIS SHOW RUNS, SHE’S PROBABLY FALCONE’S DAUGHTER OR GRAND NIECE OR SOME BULLSHIT AND JIM WILL HAVE YET ANOTHER DOOMED ROMANCE WITH HER IN THE EYES OF PAPA FALCONE WHO IS COMPLETELY HIS DAD SUBSTITUTE. JESUS.

Please get a NEW FUCKING PLOT Gotham

Unrelated: Margot Verger flashbacks, but this show 1) would never and 2) Does Not Deserve Margot. They Could Never.

STOP LOOKING AT HORSE GIRL OH MY GOD, Why is my life suffering.

YUP. CALLED IT. FUCKING CALLED IT. HIS DAUGHTER. GUESS WHO JIM’S NEXT RELATIONSHIP IS WITH GUYS? I hate myself, I hate this show. Fuck you all.

Godddddd and she’s the heir to the throne, wants to take over the family business... Fuck. This. Fuck This. Fuck everything. I hate this show.

I’ll miss you Papa Falcone, I’m so sorry you couldn’t help us this time and instead enabled a TERRIBLE subplot that I already fucking HATE. HATE SO MUCH.

“A real crime”? because muggings aren’t real crimes? Great, I’ll inform the government of that shall I? Tell them to stop breathing down my neck when I pirate music. Just because Selina was there Bruce doesn’t make it a better crime than any other. If you go after only big fish, buddy, you’ll become like Jim. Don’t do that shit Bruce. Don’t do that.

Alfred on point today, at least

Zsasz you beautiful angel, you vinyl wearing freak, I love you so much, you’re the only one I love, all the rest of them are trash. I only love you.

Talking to the ice block,mmmhmmm, mmmmmmhmmm, called it. Things going swimmingly for Nygmobblepot, as per usual

That’s uh... this is uh... uhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmm, Who The Fuck?

Also you’re... you’re fucking kidding me. You’re fucking kidding me. A blowtorch. You’re going to melt him with A blowtorch. I... I’m. You’re SURE there isn’t a master power switch that would defrost him WAY faster than this? Because... y’know, if he’s STAYING in the ice at room temperature I uh... I’m PRETTY sure he’s hooked up to some cooling vents to... y’know. Keep him in the ice. So... this whole SINGLE blow torch rescue is... I want to say futile but it’s actually WAY more idiotic than that.

Holy fuck.

Also also WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU. You’re looking at Ed like you want to sit on his face and I HAVE NEVER SEEN YOU BEFORE IN MY LIFE WHICH MEANS ED HASN’T EITHER. WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU AND WHY DO YOU HAVE THIS TERRIBLE, ILL-ADVISED, SUICIDAL CRUSH ON HIM? IF OSWALD DOESN’T MURDER YOU, ED WILL, TRUST ME, THERE IS NO SCENARIO HERE WHERE YOU GET OUT ALIVE. HOLY FUCK YOU WERE NOT AROUND FOR SEASON 3. HOLY FUCK WOMAN WHY DID YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH AN ICEBERG, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

...Zsasz do you know something about this my sweet cream puff? Or are you just amused by Oswald ‘I’m Totally Over Ed Nygma’ Cobblepot screaming at you? I mean, both are fair, both are completely fair.

And I REALLY FEEL I MUST POINT OUT THERE’S NO FUCKING WAY SHE MELTED ED THAT FAST UNLESS SHE TURNED OFF THE FREEZER THAT WAS KEEPING HIM THERE. NO FUCKING WAY. Because, my dear friends, if she didn’t, then the water would have refrozen into harder ice before she could even make a dent. That’s literally how ice sculpture works, to get that nice, smooth, hard finish, you melt the ice and refreeze it and you do it over and over again to get the shape you want. UNLESS she turned off the frost on him, with ONE blowtorch there’s NO FUCKING WAY she got him melted in the SCANT HOURS Oswald was gone. FUCK THIS SHOW. WHY DID I HAVE A BETTER PLAN TO GET HIM OUT OF THE ICE THAN YOU DID?

Ohhhhh god you’re... a fucking psycho. oh god. Just what this needed.

I... I guess you’re the Harley Quin of this show... I... Mmm. mmm. this. this sure is happening. this sure is a thing.

I see we quick taught Bruce how to talk like a dock worker

Everyone needs an accent coach, I guess

Fancy knife makes a reappearance! The plot-relevant fancy knife!

Oswald’s coping with Ed being missing pretty well, all things considering. Also, interesting... belt arm bands. We’re kicking the kink back up in this show I see.

Ah Yes. This Millennia Old Illuminated Manuscript Proves Ra’s Al Ghul Is Immortal. Drawings In Books Are Irrefutable Proof Of Identity. 

Uggggggghhhhhhhh... back to Jim Het Subplot Gordon, ugh I feel like throwing up. All of my tears Harvey. I hope you’re pissed as hell with him.

I hope you kill him, sweetie. I hope you’re only here to murder him. I’d be proud of you.

asfghjshadgksahjfwkhfkjshfdksja <--- rage typing @ Jim’s everything

*siiiiiigh* Well, at least Ed isn’t attracted to her at all. Although... that’s just feeding me ALL of the Harley vibes and MMMM. MMMMMM. You know what we DIDN’T need?

Hmmmmm, Ed doesn’t... Ed seems to be processing some shit. Interestinggggg. There’s hope for this show yet.

Ummm... weird cut away shot. I think that was an homage to Hannibal, the extreme #aesthetic close up, but I’m afraid y’all don’t have the camera crew to carry that off as it took me 8 million years to understand what I was looking at

Hey! Acupuncture is a legit thing Ed, fuck you

Your body is just all fucked up man, this’ll take time

Ed’s uh... having some bad times. Huh. Didn’t think freezing him would fuck up his brain, but uh... let’s see. That would certainly be a departure from the icy convenience.

Ewwwwwwwww @ Jim’s romantic subplot. Ugh. Why.

HE KILLED YOUR BROTHER. GOD I HOPE YOU MURDER HIM.

*rolls around in despair*

Oswald likes Bruce at least, there’s like... one whole thing

Hmmmm, it was the old switcheroo. I mean... frankly I buy the muscle atrophy thing, that totally makes sense, and... I guess his body being fine but his brain being mush, even if it doesn’t make sense, it’s satisfying? Ehhh, we’ll see

Godddd *siiiiigh*

I see that Sofia has a thing against shirts so... I mean that’s a thing

*siiiiiiigh* I hate this, I hate this, I hate this.

Zsasz, my sweet, my angel, I love you, you are my everything

Ed’s uh... he’s fine. He’s fine.

“The Lazarus Pit” ...really? That’s what we’re calling it? I think divine amniotic sack is more appropriate but... whatever man. Call your creepy green goo whatever you want.

Babs and... Ra’s Al Ghul that’s... that’s a new one

Also, how did a quality actor like Alexander Siddig end up in a trash show like this?

[missmeikakuna]

Chad and the Incel Chapter 6

Rated: M

Fandom: Original Fiction (but inspired by the Virgin vs Chad meme)

Relationship type: Male/Male with a bit of Female/Female (the lesbians are adorable, btw) and unrequited Male/Female (in other words, the guys are bisexual).

Description: Chad is, well, a Chad, or at least he looks like one. He’s got his sights set on the cool nerd Becky and enlists the help of her shy incel ex-friend Noah, offering to help him get the gorgeous girl (Stacy) he desperately wants. Noah is reluctant to help, believing that he will be stuck in inceldom forever, but Chad’s interest in his life gives him hope. When their plans go awry, they start turning their romantic attention towards each other.

Content Warning: Given the subject matter, you can guess that this story has dark themes in it, such as suicide and self-harm (plus the mental health issues that often cause them), sexism, slut-shaming homophobia, biphobia and transphobia. There is also swearing and some mentions of sex but nothing too explicit (hence the M rating as opposed to an Explicit rating).

6th Post: [Experiment] (POLL) What do you think of gay men?

At school, Noah saw Chad and immediately looked away. Chad did the same.

As he sat in class, Chad absentmindedly doodled a heart. When he noticed this, a jolt of fear ran through his spine and he scribbled over the drawing. When lunch arrived, Tyrone’s chatter became a blur in Chad’s ears as peridot eyes consumed his thoughts. Despite this, he refused to look at Noah.

On his way to his car after school, he saw a girl with thick-framed glasses who giggled and waved at him. He stared at her with lust in his eyes, but that quickly ended when the memory of Noah putting his glasses back on projected onto his mind.

At home, Chad curled his arm with a dumbbell, a manga in his other hand. When the image of Noah staring at him as he stared back popped up in his head, he dropped the dumbbell and swore as one end fell onto his foot.

The memory was replaced with another, but not of Noah. An image of Chad’s old middle school building flashed in his mind.

The sun woke Chad from his slumber. Well, that and the pencil regularly poking his cheek. He looked up and swore. Almost everyone had left the classroom. Everyone except for the teacher, who was packing her things, and the boy with the pencil in his hand.

Chad gazed at the boy’s face, which was bathed in the sunlight. The boy had a big grin that showed his missing tooth. He wore a pair of round glasses whose size made his face almost disappear. He wasn’t quite bald but had a thin bed of hair on his head. His nose bent a little to the side but he had never complained about it. He smelled strongly of supermarket cologne and his breath, as he laughed his loud, hearty laugh, was minty. When he pinched Chad’s cheek, Chad noticed how warm and sweaty his hands were. This boy was Gerry LeGume. He had been made fun of for his name but took it in stride.

‘What were you dreaming about, Sudan?’

Ah, yes. The nicknames he gave people. Usually, they were based on some sort of pun or similar word to their name. He even called himself either Gus or Matt depending on how highly he thought of himself that day (Gus for his arrogant moods, Matt for his ‘humbler’ moods). He derived these names from a film with his name as the title, a film he hadn’t even seen and yet already decided was genius.

Chad looked away. ‘You don’t dream if you only sleep for a little bit.’ He was kind of lying. He had been dreaming, though that dream swirled around his brain long before he fell asleep.

Gerry’s eyes were wide as if he was staring at a doorway to another world. ‘Is that true?’

Chad shrugged before yawning and stretching his arms. He made sure to continue looking away from Gerry, who reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope.

‘A girl gave me this to give to you,’ he explained. ‘Honestly, I wouldn’t bother reading it. I mean, she’s a coward if she doesn’t give it directly to you. And why write a letter when she could have just asked for your number?’

Chad grabbed the envelope and stared at it, rubbing his thumb against the heart sticker sealing it. He looked back up at Gerry, who was holding his glasses as he stared at him.

‘So watcha gonna do?’

Chad rested his chin on his hand and waved the envelope around with his other hand. ‘I mean, even if she did ask me for my number, I would’ve said no. I’m not looking to go out with anyone.’ Also a lie.

Gerry scoffed a laugh and turned around until he was facing the whiteboard. ‘Gay,’ he said sarcastically, though that sarcasm was lost on Chad, whose eyes travelled everywhere as if looking for an escape.

Gerry stood up and wrapped his arm around Chad’s neck, rubbing the knuckles of his free hand against Chad’s head.

‘You look like a cat that just discovered he got his own tongue,’ he said. Would it be important to mention he had high scores in English, and that he bragged about this constantly?

His body heat quickly transferred to Chad, who felt warm shivers run through his body. The cologne was overwhelming and the laughter-dispensed minty breath tickled Chad’s ear. Chad held his own arms to prevent them from doing something dangerous.

When the proximity became too much to handle, he pushed Gerry away and stood up, picking up his books and running out of the classroom. He raced home, rushed to his room and shut the door closed with all his strength. He stood against the door and slipped down onto the ground.

‘It’s nothing,’ he told himself. ‘I’ve had crushes on girls, so it’s nothing.’ He remembered Gerry’s cologne and changed that sentiment to, ‘I’m nothing.’ He held his knees up to his chin and let sour tears leave his eyes.

He kept crying for a few minutes but then decided to turn on the TV and distract himself. He took a pillow from his bed and put it on the floor, scooting close to the TV. The channel he ended up on when he turned it on was in the middle of a show. In it, a teenage boy was confessing to… another boy? What was this?

The other boy on the show smiled. ‘I thought you liked girls.’

The confessor laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. ‘I do, but I like you more.’

More tears fell down Chad’s face, but this time, when they reached his mouth, they tasted sweeter. When the television couple kissed, his heart, no, all of his organs, jumped up. Part of him felt like getting up and dancing but he heard the front door to the house open and decided against it, especially after hearing his mother call out to him.

The next day, he fidgeted in his seat, waiting for school to end. When the final bell rang, he grabbed Gerry’s arm.

‘Can we talk?’

‘Uh, sure? What is it?’

‘I mean in private. Don’t worry I’m not, you know, going to kill you or anything. Not that I ever would! Um… yeah. I just want to talk somewhere no one will hear us.’

Gerry turned his head to the side while still looking at him, but he nodded. After heading out of the building, they went behind it.  Chad took a deep breath. Then he did it again. Then a third time. He quickly started to sound like he was hyperventilating.

Gerry laughed nervously. ‘You going to talk? You were acting pretty weird yesterday. What’s going on?’

‘Do you have a crush on anybody?’ Chad sputtered out.

A blush appeared on Gerry’s face. ‘N-No… maybe… yes. Why?’

Chad forced himself to look at Gerry. He put his hands in his front pant pockets and swayed back and forth.

‘I’ve got a crush on someone.’

‘Yeah? Who?’ Gerry asked with wide eyes and a grin.

Chad lowered his head and looked at his feet. ‘You.’ He turned around to walk away but stopped himself when he heard Gerry’s reply.

‘The fuck?’ Chad turned back around and saw a barely recognisable face. It was contorted, Gerry’s nose scrunched up and his eyes narrow. ‘I thought you liked girls.’

Chad moved his arm up to grab Gerry’s arm but didn’t touch it just yet. ‘I do, but… I l-like you... m-more.’ He almost slapped himself for fumbling that line. He took Gerry’s arm but Gerry shoved his hand away, dragging Chad’s heart down to his feet.

‘That’s weird. I didn’t expect you of all people to be a faggot. You don’t exactly act like one. Why me? What did I do to deserve this?’

‘Y-you’re just… I dunno… funny and… nice… and stuff.’

‘If I’m those things, then I don’t deserve to be creeped on by a faggot.’

‘But…’

Gerry passed him, walking at an angle to keep his body as far away from Chad’s as possible.

When school ended the next day and the teacher left the room to collect something, Gerry spoke to some other friends of his on the other side of the classroom, not bothering to lower his voice so Chad couldn’t hear it.

‘It’s freaky, huh? I’ve never met an actual homo before.’ He was sitting on another student’s desk and leaning back on his hands, kicking his legs back and forth.

The boy sitting in the seat at the desk laughed. ‘Yeah, and you wouldn’t expect it. I guess anyone we know could be like that. Creepy.’

Chad shuffled towards them. ‘’m not gay,’ he murmured.

‘What? Speak up,’ a second boy commanded. He was standing next to the desk.

‘I’m not gay.’

A third boy snickered, leaning back on his chair, which was behind the first boy. ‘Then why did you say you had a crush on Gerry?’

‘I like girls but I like him more.’

Gerry groaned. ‘That again?’

The third boy shifted his chair closer, sending a light screeching noise into the classroom. ‘So you’re straight?’

Chad stepped back and put his hands in his pockets again. ‘No… maybe… I don’t know. Maybe I’m both?’

The second boy laughed.  ‘You can’t be both. You’re gay or straight. You’re not making any sense.  Do you need to be put in a loony bin or something?’

Tears started creeping out of Chad’s eyes and the boys responded with laughter. The sitting ones stood. Together with the already standing second boy, they loomed closer, towering over Chad’s cowering body.

‘So are you a faggot or are you normal?’ Gerry asked.

The boys kept pushing Chad further down with their stares. He felt like a wounded gazelle in front of an entire pride of hungry lions. He did the one thing he could think to do.

He gripped Gerry’s collar and punched him square in the jaw. The pain in his fist mixed with righteousness in his heart to make a confusing concoction. Gerry pushed Chad to the ground and started repeatedly punching him. Chad pulled his arm towards him and bit it. The other boys pounced on Chad, kicking and punching him.

Chad screamed when he felt one of his ribs crack. He lost all energy in his arms and legs and lied there as the boys continued to bash him. The boys heard the voice of a teacher they knew outside the classroom and headed out, shutting the door.

Chad licked his lips and felt like vomiting as the taste of blood poured into his mouth from the crack in his bottom lip. His gums were in pain, just barely keeping their grip on his teeth after his mouth was punched so many times. He could already feel bruises developing on his chest and cheek, the latter of which stung with tears.

When his teacher returned, she shrieked and dropped her clipboard upon seeing his shivering body. She ran to him, kneeled, held him up and called emergency services.

At the hospital, Chad didn’t tell any of the doctors or nurses what happened, keeping his mouth shut, or at least as shut as it could be with swollen lips.

His parents visited him, but they were always preoccupied with their daughter’s latest achievement, reading articles about her on their phones instead of talking to him.

One day, he asked them to show him the website and he saw a recommended article at the end of the one about his sister. In the thumbnail was a tanned, broad-shouldered man with a neck that still managed to look like a tree trunk under his big helmet. He was holding a football up in preparation to pass it to someone.

When Chad was released from the hospital the first thing he did at home was look up gridiron classes.

After the memory ended, Chad lied down on his bed and did nothing, simply looking at the ceiling and wishing he was tired enough to fall asleep.

Noah posed a question to Incels.me before going to bed. When he returned to the site a few days later, he looked at the poll and saw a mixture of views.

Anicel1919- [Experiment] (POLL) What do you think of gay men?

They’re great- 20 votes

They’re good/okay- 19 votes

I don’t care about them- 45 votes

They’re bad- 23 votes

I hate them- 8 votes

He took a deep breath before looking at the comments. The mixture remained.

Yourwaifuistrash- I mean, they’re not fucking femoids all day, so I don’t care what they do with their lives.

ERdidnothingwrong- They’re degenerates. But hey, at least if we keep them with each other, they can give each other AIDS and die out.

Hopelesscel95- Gas to faggots and trannies.

Ropeourlordandsaviour- They’re fine. Lesbians are trash, though. They claim to hate men until Chad gives them a few bottles. Then see what happens. Fucking sluts.

mxsogklash- Some of them are fine, it’s just the ones that act all effeminate that annoy me. It’s also annoying how much sex they get and despite this fact they’re treated like a protected class.

Joshua69- Soy Boy! Soy boy! Lol, I don’t really care, though. For incels there’s no reason to be against gay people.

Lookcel404- Gay men are just coping incels. They can’t get femoids interested in them so they pretend to be something they’re not and, even though they may act happy and with ‘pride’, they’re really miserable because they can’t get femoids. That’s why so many of them off themselves.

After reading through comment after comment, he noticed how tense his arms were. Was this desire, this want, this need just a ‘cope’? Was he lying to himself? Was he going crazy?

He took a few deep breaths. Just before his breaths had completely calmed down, a memory from middle school jammed itself back into his mind.

Noah closed his tabs as his mother entered the room. ‘Whatcha up to?’ she asked.

‘Nothing.’

His parents weren’t ready for the truth. To him, they were still sheep following the words of a book they hadn’t even read. It was them who gave him the worst name possible. There was no way they would be able to understand their son’s ascendance into intellectual godhood.

What activity was blowing his mind and causing him to question the fragile foundations of society? Watching atheist YouTubers, of course!

When his mother left the room, he reopened the tabs and clicked on a recommended video. The host looked different from the others. He was a clean-shaven, muscular Asian man in a sea of bearded white atheists. He had a big pearly smile as he made fun of the logical inconsistencies in Ken Ham’s books.

Noah initially listened to his counterarguments with great interest, but around halfway through the video his attention went elsewhere- the man’s muscles. After a while, Noah stopped paying attention to his words completely and started noticing how the man’s biceps were slightly shiny. He pictured someone rubbing oil over those arms.

After a few seconds of imagination, he closed the tab again and looked at his door. He breathed a sigh of relief when he realised his mother wasn’t there.

His head started spinning and he felt a little sick. He could feel his heartbeat through his ears and, when he looked down at his lap, he swore. He unzipped his jeans. When he was done, his shoulders felt as heavy as an occupied palanquin under the weight of the shame he had placed upon himself. He looked at his hand as if putrid smoke was coming out of it.

The next day was spent trying to act like nothing had happened. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up when he imagined someone chatting with him and him blurting out what happened the previous night. Luckily no one talked to him.

When he returned home, he lied down on his bed and stared at the ceiling. He wondered what would happen if he prayed. He doubted something would happen, but then he remembered something his mother always said.

‘A prayer a day keeps the despair away.’

He clasped his hands together and closed his eyes. He whispered his prayer. ‘Hey, god, I doubt you exist because your book makes no sense, but, I mean, on the off chance you are real, you mind giving me a girlfriend? You probably don’t want me repeating what I did last night. Make her a cool girl who’s interested in the same things as me. I want her to be smart. But not too smart! I don’t care if she’s pretty or whatever, just give me someone I can talk to easily. Honestly, I don’t know why I’m bothering with this infantile display of societal conformism. You can’t even hear me.’

The shame returned to his shoulders, as did the imagined smoke from his hand.

A week later, a new student joined the class. Becky White, a girl with messy hair in a ponytail and a constant frown. She scanned the class and sneered at them.

‘I was expecting more competition,’ she said as she turned to the teacher. ‘Are any of these people with an IQ higher than 110?’

Noah raised his hand. Facebook tests counted, right? Becky noted the seat next to Noah and sat next to him with a huff.

‘So, who do you prefer?  Xenophanes or Pascal?’ she asked him.

Noah felt a sting from not knowing who either was. ‘Huh?’

‘It’s a very important question. I need to know if you’re a religious conformist or not.’

‘Oh, I’m an atheist.’

Becky grinned and held out her hand. He took it and they shook hands. He couldn’t help but notice how cool, smooth and lacking in sweat her hands were. He gave her a closer look and felt his heart beat just a little faster.

Noah pushed the memory away and watched an anime to let the show occupy his thoughts.

[eye-burn-neon]

Well, Well, Well; Who do we have here?

Caution: RWBY Vol. 3 and Grimm Eclipse Spoilers

I’m re-watching the entire RWBY series; I just finished PvP, and I want to draw your attention to this figure right here:

This guy’s head appears directly after Penny’s eyes go dark, from 5:35 to 5:41 in the episode's video on Rooster Teeth’s YT channel. Here’s the six seconds I’m going to analyze and then rant about:

<iframe src='//gifs.com/embed/dr-merlot-s-first-appearance-in-rwby-pgxE7m' frameborder='0' scrolling='no' width='640px' height='360px' style='-webkit-backface-visibility: hidden;-webkit-transform: scale(1);' ></iframe>

This guy reminded me of someone in particular – Dr. Merlot. Now for any fans who haven’t played/seen/heard of Grimm Eclipse – y'all are missing out, BTW, it’s awesome – Dr. Melot is this crazy scientist who creates mutated Grimm. He’s basically got a couple of screws loose.

Case in point:

Let’s analyze the original photo of the unidentified figure:

So the man himself has unruly white hair that is balding at the top, tanned skin, pronounced eyebrows, and a white shirt that appears to me to be a lab coat, which is what made me think of the Evil Doctor in the first place. I note there are differences between the two, but we also haven’t seen him for a while, and people change appearance, like growing a full beard instead of a weird mustache - goatee combo. Also, self-destructing your life’s work can probably be cause enough for you to lose some hair.

Furthermore, the environment around him is clearly indoors, and reminiscent of a storage facility or hanger. There appears to be either black garage-style doors in the background, or a storage space for what could be a suit of armor -- or perhaps it’s a prototype for a new robot/fighting machine? Either way the lighting gives the space a creepy, laboratory-like feel.

The man is watching the fight take place on a video screen that projects the feed from Atlas News. I’m assuming that the reach of the Atlas tower would include any islands in the northern part of Remnant, so it’s safe to assume that this man is in that area.

From Grimm Eclipse, we know that Merlot island is remote and an unknown location, though it’s probably safe to assume it’s somewhere close-ish to the NW part of Vale, as the cargo ship RWBY stowed away on left from Forever Falls, which is located in Sanus, the region shown here:

I think after Dr. Merlot fled his island, it’s entirely possible he headed north, possibly to build a new hideaway to continue his crazy-pants work. Frankly, we don’t know where he is, so this is up in the air and completely debatable.

Now let’s go back to the man himself:

Let’s look at the clip from a cinematography perspective: the first shot is one of the back of his head, which could indicate:

he’s just watching the telly

the intent is to have a air of mystery about him, to keep his identity a secret.

I’m inclined to believe the latter because there are TWO clips of this man. The second is just of his hand:

The camera focuses on this hand long enough to see it clench. Why would there be a wasted shot of a random man’s hand clenching unless viewers are supposed to be shown that he’s upset about Penny’s death? On that note, I would like to make the following conclusion:

Dr. Merlot built Penny.

I’m going to have to do a lot of analysis here, so buckle up.

In Vol. 2, Chapter 3: A Minor Hiccup Penny tells Ruby “I've never been to another kingdom before. My father asked me not to venture out too far, but, oh you have to understand, my father loves me very much. He just worries a lot.” Merlot seemed very fond of his mutated Grimm, so I would imagine he would be just as fond of Penny; if he built her, she may just be his greatest achievement, and he wouldn’t want her to be compromised or fail.

When Ruby asks why she didn’t let them know she was okay after the fight at the end of the first Volume, Penny responds “I, was asked, not to talk to you. Or Weiss... or Blake... or Yang. Anybody really.” If Dr. Merlot is indeed Penny’s father, he would be angry about their interference on his island, but probably has no way to lash out in revenge without raising suspicion, so he just told Ironwood to keep Penny away from team RWBY (I’ll get to the Ironwood thing in a minute).

"Was your dad that upset?" Ruby asks. Penny hesitantly replies "No, it wasn't my father." Penny then becomes uncomfortable watching the military's presentation. "Maybe we should go somewhere else..." After the truck incident, Penny finally confides in Ruby and tells here in the next episode that “Most girls are born, but I was made. I'm the world's first synthetic person capable of generating an aura." I can’t even begin to imagine how that technology would work, but if Dr. Merlot can do freaky things combining dust and grimm, I think he’s the most likely candidate to be able to combine a soul and a machine into a cohesive unit.

After Penny has exhibited her strength and power multiple times, Ruby says during a crushing hug, “I can see why your father would want to protect such a delicate flower!” Penny says "Oh, he's very sweet. My father's the one that built me! I’m sure you would just love him!” (After the analysis I’ve done thus far, I have to say that, unfortunately, she probably wouldn’t, Penny.)

The next part of their conversation makes me veeerry curious:

R: “Wow, he built you all by himself?”

P: “Well almost, he had some help from Mr. Ironwood.”

R: “The general? Wait, is that why those soldiers were after you?”

P: “They like to protect me too!”

R: “Pfft. They don’t think you can protect yourself?”

P: “They're not sure if I'm ready yet. One day, it will be my job to save the world. But I still have a lot left to learn. That's why my father let me come to the Vytal festival. I want to see what it’s like in the rest of the world, and test myself in the tournament.”

R: “Penny, what are you talking about? Save the world from what? We’re in a time of peace.”

P: “That’s not what Mr. Ironwood said.”

So we know that General Ironwood is on the whole maiden-secret-society shindig, so we presume he’s a ‘good’ guy. I’m sure you’re asking yourself, Now why would Dr. Merlot, a crazy scientist who’s probably a global criminal, be working with the general of an army? I, too, wondered about that, and I think that the most likely explanation is that Ironwood already knew Dr. Merlot; he trusts him. We know Ironwood has robotic prosthetics; his right arm, leg, part of his torso, and right forehead are all made of metal. The piece on his forehead makes me think that part of the damage may have been in his brain, which could be a tricky area to repair. Perhaps Ironwood’s cyborg-like parts were manufactured by Dr. Merlot, who, despite turning to questionable research methods, was a brilliant scientist. Knowing this, Ironwood could which could have led him to turn to the doctor, despite any charges against him. Dr. Merlot could still have a secret vendetta; I think it would be awesome if he resurfaces and is in league with Salem and her squad. I imagine he would have a high interest in the nature of maiden’s powers -- OOH WAIT Ironwood supplied the machines to do the aura transfer from Amber to Pyrrha! Connecting that with Penny’s aura, perhaps Dr. Merlot had dedicated his studies to that of auras, in order to keep under the radar and continue his work.

I look forward to future volume of RWBY to see if Dr. Merlot resurfaces I just hope he doesn’t turn out to be as aura-ble as he was in Grimm Eclipse!

--

K, that got a lot longer than I intended. But that’s good, I found more evidence to support my theory and developed it further. Even if it turns out to be completely wrong (that’s the beauty of a show’s plot development), this was fun to make!

Do you agree with my evidence, or do you have another theory as to the unidentified man’s identity and/or Dr. Merlot’s current whereabouts and motivation? Let me know what you think!