#but if a trans person is telling you that the thing you're saying is untrue/is a harmful transphobic stereotype

[two-calicos-in-a-trenchcoat]

You know what im not done with this

Like im really not trying to come off as some chronically online gen-zer that gets easily offended or some shit

But fuck man just being older does not mean you always know more than someone younger than you especially in terms of knowledge about things that YOU DO NOT HAVE PERSONAL EXPERIENCE WITH

Like no, random cis person who has known very few trans people irl and only has the absolute elementary school level of knowledge of what transness is, you dont actually know more about being trans and what constitutes transphobia than the 26 year old trans person that you're arguing with

And them getting frustrated with you for defending saying transphobic shit and not listening when they calmly try to explain it to you does not make them overly sensitive

[euniexenoblade]

https://www.tumblr.com/spacelazarwolf/762656296882372608/httpswwwtumblrcomeuniexenoblade7625264206794

"B-But transfemmes are the ones who made the film into a cult classic! If you don’t like it, don’t watch it!! It’s literally that simple!!!"

First off, space laze deciding a long post I wrote about trauma is an "argument" is very telling, it's not an argument, the post in question even says that it's just thoughts. Hold on. Why am I saying this, I'll just screenshot it.

This is not an argument. This was never an argument. This is just digesting thoughts about how so many of us have trauma with a specific piece of media. The "transfemmes made it popular" thing, though silly and untrue, isn't actually addressing anything I said. My post can *still* be true while that'd be true too, the two don't contradict each other.

That said it's untrue. Transfems do not hold that level of social capital. The movie isn't a niche hit with trans specific crowds, it's a literal cult classic. The love for it is so much bigger than that. It's a bigger movie than that now. Are there transfems that love it? Yeah. Are there transfems that were involved in its uprising as "queer cinema?" Yeah. But to say it was only transfems is ahistorical and silly.

At the end of the day, it's once again just a guy mocking a woman for something they didnt even bother to read. It's typical anti-feminist methodology. The entire book about problematic media goes out the window. "Uh uh uh people can't be traumatized with the movie cuz ummm transfems like it!" That's not how things work and never has been. Liking a movie that is problematic isn't a bad thing, but if you're literally so resistant to any critical reading of a movie, you're just anti-intellectual.

"if you don't like it, don't watch it." Ok, but the thing is *I don't watch it* and I'm discussing why. Like, it's just misogynistic and dismissive. But also - just because a woman criticizes a movie doesn't mean you're not allowed to like it, spacey. This is the same response that my Barbie movie review garnered "UHHH why are you writing 8999 paragraphs just don't watch it" it's anti-feminism and anti-intellectualism. The dude did not need to be a douche about what is a personal post.

Speaking about *that*

The second part of this:

Anon, why are you sending my personal posts to a known anti-feminist/transmisogynist? Did you not think I wouldn't notice the ask that they received looks awfully similar to this one I got? Or did you think I'd be blinded by the specter of drama that I'd not notice? Why are you stirring the pot? Scroll through my blog, you'll just find me writing smut and reblogging art. Did that bother you? Did you *crave* me being in arguments? Why? Why are you sending douchebag MRAs I have blocked my posts?

I will not answer asks like this ever again. Stop being a coward and do it off anon you creep.

[albeitinzane]

sooo i'm watching james somerton's apology video (an unlisted reupload because i do not want to give him money!) and i'm only 2:31/43:01 in but i already have so many thoughts about how manipulatively worded this video is so i thought i'd make a blog post about it, maybe see what some other people thought.

james tries to frame himself as a wellmeaning, albiet privledged, white cis gay man. he tries to say that he was trying to be a voice for the queer community because he wanted to uplift more marginalized members of the queer community. i think this is inherently false.

the way james repeatedly presented himself to his audience was that he was the only person talking about the issues he was discussing (while stealing other people's words, but we'll come back to that in a second). he literally said "people thought i was crazy until i explained it and then they came around to seeing it my way" (maybe he didn't say it exactly that way, i'm paraphrasing, but you get my point). him trying to say that this is not what he did is so obviously untrue. he DID do that. multiple times. he propped himself up as the only gay creator talking about the issues he discussed, and rarely promoted other queer content creators. if he wanted to be a spokesperson for the queer community, he would have at least mentioned other queer people who talked about issues he found important, rather than just stealing their content and reposting it as his own. it's disingenuous to call himself a spokesperson when he never highlighted the people he was supposedly speaking for.

it wouldn't be bad, per se, if james was actually trying to be a spokesperson for the queer community, though i think that even if that motivation were true, it'd still be misguiding. while allyship from more privileged members of the community is important, it feels like a bit of a white savior complex for him to claim that he wanted to be a spokesperson for the queer community. plenty of other people are much more qualified to be spokespeople for the queer community, and i personally think that if the queer community did have a spokesperson, it would make more sense for them to be a black trans woman instead of a cis white gay man.

and back to the stealing part. if you wanted to be a spokesperson for a community, you'd respect them. you'd credit their work. you'd make it clear where you were quoting them, and you'd promote their content, not just the content you're citing or borrowing from, but other things that they create that you find meaningful or interesting. james never did this. if someone made an intelligent article about queerness in media, he wouldn't promote it. he'd steal it, and use it along with some stock footage with an intro he bought to make a video where the only acknowledgement the article would receive is a vague "based on" credit, assuming they'd get anything at all.

so, no. i don't believe james is telling the truth. he had many opportunities to come clean. he was called out before, and instead of being honest, he chose to lie. and i hope that the best job that he can find in the future is being a fry cook at burger king, where he can experience just a tiny taste of the exploitation that he utilized to make thousands of dollars off of small queer writers.

[softbutchthatlovesyou]

First things first: I am not deactivating. Just. Taking a break.

Mututals: You can get my discord if I don't ask for yours before I leave in a couple days. You can also give me a snap though I may be worse at responding to that.

This is my reasons for leaving so no one thinks I do anything crazy, or if anyone has their own gripe they can take this as a sign to take a mental health break of your own.

.

The Racism on this site remains unchecked, and the agression against black user who call it out should absolutely NOT be that high. You adore recreating the racist systems that got us here in the first place. You think your lense on how we experience opression, even the theories we wrote, are better and clearly so much superior.

Exorsexism is disgustingly rampant. We are a jokes to people. We are fakes to other. We are a convenient argument about people passing. We are "dangerous" to a preciously protected set of binaries that do nothing to help any of us.

Lesbophobia across the site has no reason to be so high on a site with so many Lesbians and yet!! We treat labels like they're more important than lives. People act like a personal interpretation of the idenity is an attack. We go "Being a Lesbian is so complex. It's intricate and special" And then when a butch takes t, or a femmes uses he and maybe even gets top surgery, or someones attraction isnt the simply wlw Lesbianism they're told they're doing it wrong and that it's not fair to try and over complicate being a lesbian.

Transandrophobia and Transmisogyny against me and other trans people on this site is out of control. People are infighting and people are lashing out laterally and comparing it 1:1 to the opression the system holds against all of us.

Intersexism continues to be like, so easy for you guys to commit no matter how many voices speak up about how best to be aware of intersex issues.

You guys adore ableism just as you have for years and years. You're obsessed with degrading people who do mental illness or disability "wrong." You see someone stuggling with illness and you don't wait to tell them your personal opinion on their experience. Adding ocd triggering guilt tripping to post. Refusing to hear out people about adding image ids/alt images and how screen readers work.

The Antisemitism I was seeing well before 10/7 was gross. It only increased as people scrambled not to be associated with "the bad jew." People had mutuals and friends for years that abandoned them at the first chance. They spread lies or twisted truths in order to chose Jewish bloggers off the site. I DO notice that when people make post on antisemitism there is often more Jewish people than goy in the notes acknowledging it. I don't think I've seen one without horrid Antisemitism in it's own notes in months. Multiple people have told me to leave my heritage out of pride in their attempts to keep out Jewish people.

Voices from Palstine are only used when they support certain ideas. You all turned supporting people into a fucking witch hunt against profiles on the Internet. You reblog a post of Palastine joy and then reblog an unsourced tweet about something Palstinians have said isn't true, that slanders Jewish people unprompted. For a long time some of you weren't even sharing the right sources for helping them bc you couldn't fact check before sharing?

-

And then there's fucking STAFF. They couldn't stop themselves from banning trans blogs if you paid them. They couldn't keep harassment campaigns at bay if it killed someone.

They used us to coax queer people here for years by sharing that they support queer identities and even at one point let our porn exist here! And then it was all fucking wiped off the map. Now one mass reporting of an untrue claim can get an minorties blog permanently removed.

They say "We need money!" but when people gave it to them this site got w o r se. They use distractions and try and make stuff around the fun shit we came up with to keep us from fussing.

They mute and remove users who make a loud enough point to sway people. They mute and removes uses that are so quiet no one would notice.

Minorties inboxes are a headache.

.

So I'm out. I'll probably be back at some point because I have things I DO enjoy here.

But for mental health I just gotta catch my breath.

This will be my pinned until I get back I guess im case anyone wonders where I went.

I'll have a queue going of a few last minute things i want on my blog but when it runs out thats it for a while until I return.

Thats all

[nerdygaymormon]

Matthew 15: 10-20 - Racist, transphobic, and homophobic words make us unworthy

10 Jesus called the crowd to him and said, “Listen and understand. 11 What goes into someone’s mouth does not defile them, but what comes out of their mouth, that is what defiles them.”

12 Then the disciples came to him and asked, “Do you know that the Pharisees were offended when they heard this?”

13 He replied, “Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by the roots. 14 Leave them; they are blind guides. If the blind lead the blind, both will fall into a pit.”

15 Peter said, “Explain the parable to us.”

16 “Are you still so dull?” Jesus asked them. 17 “Don’t you see that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body? 18 But the things that come out of a person’s mouth come from the heart, and these defile them. 19 For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander. 20 These are what defile a person; but eating with unwashed hands does not defile them.” (Matthew 15:10-20 NIV)

————————————————————

There's 4 points in this passage I want to highlight.

Point #1 - What goes into someone's mouth does not defile them

I know this is referring to food and is about eating, especially about eating non-kosher foods, but I also think of the ways people think of sex and sexuality as defiling people. Some people think certain types of sex are wrong or bad or icky and defile the people involved. If you want to put things in your mouth that others say is defiling you, tell them "Jesus says 'Don't yuck my yum."

In January 1982, the First Presidency sent bishops a letter that oral sex is "unnatural, impure, and unholy." Many bishops started denying temple recommends to married couples who engaged in oral sex. You can imagine the ruckus this caused. Nine months later, after receiving many letters, the First Presidency sent another letter with the instructions to stop asking couples about this. Unfortunately, the idea stayed around and it was common for engaged couples to be taught that once they were married they could not engage in oral or anal sex and still be considered worthy. But that was wrong!

—————————

Point #2 - It's what comes from someone's mouth that defiles them

The words you speak which hurt others actually defiles the speaker because they reflect what's in their hear. Racist, transphobic, and homophobic words make someone unworthy! Saying mean thing in order to cut someone deeply makes you unclean!

—————————

Point #3 - What we speak can heal & purify us and others

The words we speak reveals our heart. Hurtful and untrue words defile us. The opposite would be true, that loving, uplifting, kind words protect and cleanse us. In our churches, do we speak up for the marginalized?

One way we can do this is to think about how we can be a trans ally at church.

Does our building have a restroom open to all genders? If not, we could ask for this. Such restrooms benefit not just people with queer gender identities, but everyone who wants a little more privacy or a parent helping a little child in the restroom.

If there's someone who is trans, enby, intersex, genderfluid, we can offer to have them accompany us to the gendered meetings of Relief Society, Young Women classes, or Priesthood quorum. It's more difficult for genderqueer individuals to be excluded if cisgender people are showing solidarity.

When we have the opportunity to speak in Sacrament meeting, do we include trans people in the stories we share? Telling a story of a dad playing ball with his son doesn't have to be cis and straight, trans people also do these things.

Think about how you might respond to transphobic comments made in Sunday School. "Hey, these are children of God you're talking about. The Handbook says they're welcome to attend our church. Be kind!"

—————————

Point #4 - It's okay to leave

One of the disciples points out to Jesus that the Pharisees were offended by what He said, and Jesus basically said, "Don't care!"

Jesus went even further, and says, "Leave them. What they're teaching isn't from God and they're leading people astray, so don't waste your time putting up with their bullsh*t."

For queer people in unaffirming churches, it is fine to leave. You don't have an obligation to stay and fix the church.

The primary commandments are to love God and love people. If they are not loving queer people, then they are blind. Don't follow the blind into the pit they're headed for.

I continue to attend a non-affirming church. I point out the inappropriate and hurtful things said and done to queer people by my church. I try to increase understanding. But it is a choice, I'm not required to spend my time and energy defending myself or trying to get church leaders to change their minds. More importantly, by being in this church I can help myself and other queer Latter-day Saints learn to accept and love themselves, and that is keeping the commandment to love yourself and love your neighbor.

[stellacadente]

For the ask game

14 and 8!

thank you!! <3

14. Who is your favorite director? Why?

hard to pick just one, but if i have to, i'd say mrinal sen. because he had such a raw and unflinching way to look at and show the issues of his country, india (which are, in some ways, issues not just restricted to india, but he obviously looks at how they present in india). he wasn't afraid to show the ugly truth and to denounce the injustices that pervaded the country (and in some ways still do). i love the way he's able to sometimes mix fiction and documentary, and i think some of his movies that i watched had insane editing

8. Has a film ever made you extremely angry?

ohhhhhh yeah. a fantastic woman (2017). just literal trauma porn about a trans woman who doesn't experience one single good thing and is treated like shit by everyone around her in the vilest, most overt ways. which, i'm not denying it happens, but the film clearly only wants to show the most obvious transphobia and 1) it's stomach turning to see a trans woman on screen go through so many hate crimes and invasions of privacy and just the worst shit ever; trans people, especially trans women, don't want to see a movie directed by a cis man that shows how utterly, always horrible life is for a trans woman character; 2) in doing this, in showing only the most extreme, overt transphobia, it tries to tell cis audiences that that's the only way they can be transphobic and mistreat a trans person. it's like giving them a pat on the back like, don't worry, if you're not doing this really horrible thing to a trans woman in your life, you're safe, you can't be transphobic and have no self reflection to do (untrue most of the time! as shown by the vastly positive reception this film got from cis people). anyway, i'd have more to say, and i especially had more to say when the movie was fresh in my mind (it's been over 3 years, thankfully it's not anymore) but suffices to say it's a movie about a trans woman made by a cis man for a cis audience

[vulpinesaint]

camelia + papyrus + taro <3 mwah

camellia ⇢ what were you like when you were younger? do you think you’ve changed a lot?

man honestly i think i was just a smaller version of myself when i was younger haha. when i think of myself as a kid i think of how judgemental i was in my head... truly starting the haterism young. you know me and you have met my mother and if i tell you that i was raised that way it probably makes sense haha :) forever thought i was doing SUCH a good job of being subtle about disliking people but someone in middle school casually mentioned "yeah, you hated me in elementary school" so. just as with now. very good at being a hater not very good at hiding it. sorry nick you were actually the cool one of that group of boys but i thought your friends sucked so bad 👍

DEFINITELY a little superiority complex. my mom raised me to be confident in my abilities and has never been shy about saying that she thinks i'm better than my peers 😭 voracious reader, insane little reading level, very opinionated and sure of himself. developed the opposite problem though where i came to the conclusion that people would not like me if i was succeeding where they were not and that nobody would want to be my friend if i told them i got 100% on a test so i kind of. stopped talking about my academic achievements to people. currently working very hard on being able to just say "i did this and i'm proud of it!" to people cause i feel like i'm being an asshole and bragging every time 😭 i have this foundational memory of using a big word in like. fourth grade maybe. and having sam mullen Stare at me like i'd grown another head. and deciding that i needed to dumb down my vocab a little bit when i was talking to people that were not my parents lol

lots of whimsy alongside the haterism though! believed in fairies for sure, played the hell out of imagination games. really liked peter pan and alice in wonderland. favorite computer game was that little pixie hollow game that loaded slow as hell. loved reading fantasy stories. would wrestle my brothers to the ground and pin them there to win arguments and assert dominance. had monster high and ever after high dolls :) draculaura was my favorite obviously (dressed up as her for halloween once) but i always knew in my heart that i was more of a frankie stein whether i liked it or not... thought raven queen was cool obviously.

all the time i'm going "man it doesn't even matter but i'm not a good trans person i was such a girly girl" but this is like. untrue. my mother put me in dresses throughout most of my elementary school career cause she really wanted to make sure that me and my siblings were presentable so i certainly Seemed girly. i liked dressing up. but i also went to kindergarten and i remember staring so hard at this girl named hannah who was a tomboy while i was in the sandbox or whatever. and i decided in my head that i Was a tomboy. like i wore dresses but that wasn't what mattered... i had other things going on that made me a tomboy... and i told my mom that and she laughed and it broke my heart a little bit so i said Nothing about anything like that again until i came out as transgender in high school 😭 in middle school i remember thinking that i kind of wanted to dress like a boy except i Couldn't. not because it wasn't allowed but because it was Ugly. genuinely stopped myself from being a boy because i hated the thought of khaki cargo shorts so much. all of which is to say that i think i am just the same as i was when i was a kid haha :D

papyrus ⇢ if you put your ‘on repeat’ playlist on shuffle, what’s the first song that comes up? what do you like about it / associate it with?

so american by olivia rodrigo. you have done ruinous things to my reputation by making me like this song so much... someone looked over at my phone once and went "you're listening to olivia rodrigo?" how am i supposed to keep my cool alt boy façade up if i am forever so delighted and bashful and giddy and enamoured with the fact that i am the boy who is like a poem you wish you wrote. to me seeing you post so american by olivia rodrigo is like when you see me post poems that you know are about you... in my head forever. nobody ever talks about the feeling of hearing what someone else's love song is For You

taro ⇢ if someone called you right now to catch up, what’re the things you’d tell them about?

what a silly question to ask me when you know damn well from experience that it's venom all the way down haha. would tell them about school i guess! told annelise today about my professor who married a republican that i hate and about my friend who got pronouns over the summer! but then uh. that's the friend who works at a comics store. who is getting me venom comics. and then we're sitting in a park with cheesecake having a lovely picnic and i am vividly narrating the last fifteen issues of the venom run i'm on and talking about the differences between the comics and the movies when you have seen Neither of them yet 👍 i am a simple man. i have literally nothing fucking else in my head right now 😭

 ﹟random get-to-know-me ask game  !! 

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

On the topic of fem fortress, I agree and disagree. For the record I fall under the trans umbrella myself as well and I used the have the same opinion. You are entitled to your opinion of course but calling gender swapped art transphobic is a little too much. My problem with gender swapped art is if they make the female version without wrinkles or without the same body type. If you want to draw the mercs as trans that is totally fine and awesome but again calling people transphobic for drawing vid versions of characters sounds like a little bit of projection no offence. If someone were to draw me as a gender swapped version of me as cis personally I wouldn’t care. And again I’m only talking for me here but calling someone transphobic over something as small as this is taking away from actually transphobia that us real living people have to deal with. I don’t think I’ll change your mind and that’s ok with me. I hope you’ll at least consider this point of view. Love your blog and I hope you have a nice day.

Anon I genuinely do not want to be mean but like. do you know how to read? Nowhere in that post do I say "all genderbent art is transphobic" and I specifically disclaim that I do NOT think that because I KNEW this was the kind of reaction I would get. I can't help but feel like you are either intentionally or unintentionally misrepresenting what I said in order to make my critique sound more outlandish and unreasonable and craaaaaazy and thus easier to disagree with than it is, which is something that Always fucking happens to me whenever I talk about transphobia as a trans person, biphobia as a bi person, racism as a Latino person, etc, someone misrepresenting my argument to make me look like an oversensitive "triggered" idiot for even daring to see bigotry in something "small". I understand that YOU might feel comfortable with people whose genderbent art is like "the thing that makes this character a man is that he was born with a penis and ascribes to all cis standards of 'masculinity' and the thing that makes my new genderbend a woman is that she was born with a vagina and ascribes to all cis standards of 'femininity'" but I don't! I would not want someone to "genderbend" me and make me cis! I do not think it "takes away from 'REAL' transphobia" (whatever that means, transphobia in media and fiction is still transphobia and still affects people in real life) to say that "associating the gender of a character with the 'biological sex' of that character is cissexist" and/or "showing that you have 'genderbent' a 'male' character by making them ascribe more heavily to 'female' beauty standards is not just transphobic but misogynistic" (MASSIVE FUCKING PROBLEM with "fem fortress" designs, since when is Medic tf2 thin and petite or since when does Sniper tf2 wear makeup and a crop top and since when do either of them not have any wrinkles), that's like. completely normal media critique. I know that a lot of my followers enjoy "fem fortress" and I have tried to be as nice as I can about my critiques of SOME VERSIONS of it because of this, but like you need to be able to take critique of things that you enjoy. Nowhere do I say "all genderbend art is transphobic" but it seems like people are rejecting that for "no genderbend art is transphobic" which is just objectively untrue. I enjoy tf2 and I am able to make and take critiques of it, especially things like its portrayal of women characters (or lack thereof), but not everyone can. I would like to be able to talk about misogyny, biphobia, racism, or transphobia within this game and/or its fandom just once without someone inevitably coming to tell me "it's not that bad and you're just overreacting". I guess I'm not saying you have to agree with me but maybe try actually listening to what I say and not knee-jerk react like this bc I lightly criticized something you enjoy (which I have even praised in other posts, wouldn't you know! I think fem fortress is fun!)

[corvusissotired]

Trans and jewish ppl also said they still support and love the franchise. It was an integral part to their journey. Guess what. They have been told to stfu because they don't speak for their community. You see how fucked up it is? BOTH povs are valid. You can't dismiss one voice over the other to fit your agenda. The world is not black or white. Ppl are entitled to their opinion and telling trans and jewish ppl that support the game and franchise to fuck off is wrong. Period.

Lol buddy cmon. First, like I'm gonna believe an anon. It's so easy to link evidence of these Jewish and trans people saying they needed to buy the game because HP--an antisemitic, racist series made by a fomenting, raging mistake of a human being who has literally implied ALL trans women are, TRIGGER WARNING, rapists in a wig and skirt--was integral to their journey. Not saying it's not true, just saying it's hard to believe. Put up or shut up.

Second, at no point have I said it's ok to tell Jewish and trans people who play HL that they aren't part of their respective communities because they enjoy HP or even HL. It's not. But please note that, while you're 100% still part of the community and deserve rights as much as the rest of us, I will not trust you. A lot of us won't. Because you put a game above our lives, above your own life. And you absolutely are allowed to be upset about that but...something something fuck around and find out? Your actions have consequences. Literally don't know what else to say. It also makes zero sense. You want rights...but you're actively shitting on them by buying this game. Not saying it's ok to gatekeep, just putting it into perspective that if you do want basic fucking rights, maybe don't buy a game thats made by someone who is actively working to take them away? In any case, I have yet to see anyone in the anti HL tag, to streamers, to ANYONE who's playing the game, say any of that. That sounds fake as hell. Again, could be real but it's a bit unbelievable. Put up or shut up.

Anyway, not sure why you're bent about all this in my inbox. I have said none of these things so sounds like you're just another one of those people who, every time a trans person has a negative opinion about HL, you feel guilty and lash out. If you're here from my post, guess what? None of what I said was meant to be taken as a threat to people who play HL. My point with that post was to point out the people who buy it purely to hate trans people even more and that they're proving our ostracization, our being killed, is merely a joke to them. If you don't see the issue with that, or think there's 2 eQuaLLy iMpOrtAnt siDeS, there's seriously no helping you.

Please also note that none of what I said was untrue either. This is how fascism works. It starts slow and small. It's just a game right? But that game takes money. And that money goes into the pockets of an absolute mistake of a human. And then she gives it to politicians and bills and organisations that actively want marginalized people gone, dead. And now those politicians make office and those bills pass and those orgs are funded even more by these people now in power. And now they've seized that power and are actively killing people like me and you and other marginalized groups.

But go a-fucking-head. Have your game. Enjoy your nostalgia. But please ask yourself: was it worth it? Was it worth it to help put people's lives even more in danger than they already are, just so you could have your few months of dopamine and nostalgia from a game that will be forgotten in about a year? And maybe also ask yourself if it was worth it to put YOUR OWN life at risk for a few months of nostalgia and dopamine. Because a LOT of us don't think it is. And it's unfair that you are putting a literal game above our and your own life.

[jackawful]

Thing is, isolating their targets from trans women is an intentional step too. The lies they tell about trans women depend on you not like...personally knowing any. But also, the existance of people who can choose womanhood and experience it as a positive thing directly disproves the "womanhood is inherently about suffering" point they use to convince transmascs to detransition. Having good relationships & community with trans people of all sorts of gender and life experience makes it clear that what terfs say is obviously untrue. When you're transmasc, comparing experiences with transfems lets you tease out, materially, the differences between misogyny and dysphoria. Which makes it clear that a lot of detransitioners who think womanhood is suffering are dysphoric and hate being women because they're not women.

Got a terf in my sideblog and the reply is not worth deigning with a response but the pinned post?

This? This is a trap. This is concern baiting. Be very sure that shit like this is not in your best interest and does not care about you. The goal of rhetoric like this is conversion.

You’ll be welcomed and asked to ignore transphobia. You will be asked to side with transphobes at the expense of trans women. Eventually, you’ll be asked to see that, hey, maybe you transitioned to escape how terrible it is to be a woman?

This may seem obviously a trap but I see people every day buy into this. People like this do not care about you! They want to “rescue” you and don’t let them convince you otherwise.

[thekaratcake-blog]

Again you're adding "especially" because it makes you sound less like the tantrum throwing child that you are, that isn't what was said at all. And no, it is in no sense exclusionist to specify one group in a positivity post, and that's not a "real issue" like you claim to care about. There's no real "logic" to what you're doing, you just want to kick up a fuss about anything and everything that you don't think is morally perfect or doesn't center you specifically.

And again, you are not the only person on the planet. You are also not a wheelchair user and have no idea what it's like to be one or what issues wheelchair users face. Go back to Reddit where at least you'll be annoying people like yourself, instead of harassing people trying to talk about their oppression because you think that anything that isn't about you isn't real.

Right so if it's not exclusionary to take an otherwise more supportive sentence and directly narrow the scope of it by adding an extra qualifier where it's completely unnessecary, what would you call that? Btw?

Also we literally just covered the fact that I'm calling out shit that is directly about me

Anyway, how close are we to the part where you start misgendering me and telling me to kill myself? All your friends have done it and after all you read my post that says "I'm not on here to fight, I want to look at memes" and went "HA! I know better what this person wants than they do, I should go harass them and drag them into one of those fights they explicitly said they don't want, over issues that I don't understand!"

But please, tell me, do you agree with the posts I called out?

Do you agree that all of american pop culture is designed specifically to hurt intersex people?

That no one in the queer community other than other trans men will believe them about their dysphoria?

Or are you just arguing because me pointing out blatantly untrue and patently absurd things has made you insecure about your own blatantly untrue and patently absurd beliefs?

Or you think it's just oh so awful that someone wouldn't believe massive sweeping claims on someone's word alone despite it contradicting all evidence and statistics?

Oh and about that whole tantrum throwing child, you wanna explain what part of what I'm doing is that? Or are you just throwing around insults because it makes you feel tough, because you have nothing productive to say and just want to hurt other people for disagreeing with you on the internet

I tend to stay off reddit, because it has a shitty atmosphere, and I'ad vise you do the same, as if this is your reaction to someone saying "Hey that doesn't actually happen" or "Hey specifically adding a word that wasn't nessecary to narrow the scope of a support post and exclude certain people from it is... narrowing the scope of the post and excluding certain people on it" and if I am "breathtakingly" bigoted, pretty sure you'd explode there, or like, actually talking to just about anyone in real life

Do you have any idea how sheltered it makes you seem that I am your standard of "breathtakingly" transphobic? Do you have any idea how hard that makes it to take you even slightly seriously? You have people out here advocated for the genocide of trans people, calling them evil mentally ill perverts preying on children, but no, I am "breathtakingly transphobic" for... explicitly saying I support other trans people but that doesn't give them a pass to blatantly lie or exaggerate things? Because nothing does?

Go outside man, go see the world and grow thicker skin, "breathtakingly transphobic" that's... honestly genuinely funny

[easily-bullied]

alright updates. I texted them. things blew up. I was made to feel like my feelings exist to make the other person feel bad. that my having needs was unreasonable. and bigggg realization... that was a microcosm of the whole relationship. making myself as small as possible hoping that would be small enough and then it wasn't. real bad. a roller coaster. and I I was addicted to it. at least I have closure. at least I know that I can't and I won't go back. at least I know that they hurt me and I hurt me. at least I know I have the capacity to dilute myself still. that I can still go to that toxic well. I'm so fucking used to it. daddy issues. god.

so I move forward? god I'm desperate to be loved again though. like I have this need to have someone tell me I'm special. I was reading back what I wrote last time and it was both sad and enlightening. that girl was still so love sick. I'm sorry baby but that was a waste. not that I blame you. but I'm glad to see that lookin back in it feels like almost someone else. and it wasn't long ago or anything, just that door is firmly closed. by me. but hey girl in the past, they did miss you, they told me. and then they still couldn't prioritize your feelings in any way. same as always. me doing all the work for them. apologizing to myself for them, making excuses for them, limiting what I say for them. huh sounds like there might have been a reason you were so tired Momo.

god I'm loving writing again. mosa, don't forget this helps you. I forget every thought I have lol. when I record them and look at them again it's like oh RIGHT ya she figured that out. I need to give myself more credit.

a lot of people telling me that I have a life they're jealous lately. that's something to think about I guess. not to placate my depression or convince myself of something untrue, but to at least be grateful for the good things, the things I started to take for granted. a full social life, a found family, a great apartment, the perfect kitty, an identity that's growing and changing but there, firmly planted. I've been feeling like I'm not filled in lately, like I'm an outline. mosa give yourself grace. you're a sapling still. just planted. you still need extra water, you're still just making roots. but you're out of the soil, you're reaching for the sun, you're definitely visible and here. there's still lots to go and isn't that exciting? the tree you're becoming. the tree that you are, the seed that you were.

I hate that I'm going to have to just love myself. that that's the solution. god doesn't someone else wanna do that for me? can't I have someone be like oh wait you like vacuuming and I like loving you?! let's split the chores! oh well. more improvements needed I guess. never gonna be finished. always fighting my demons. guess I'm gaining exp (barf)

not me trying to focus on how at least I've fucked hotties all summer. like that's something I can hang my hat on. so stupid Mosa. well if I participate in hook up culture, I get to hook up with cuties. unfortunately I want to be WIFE. I am good at wife I think. apparently I'm good at hook ups too but thats less fulfilling. and I'm always trying to be good enough at hook up to become wife.

hey mosa, can I talk to you for a second. don't creep on ex's socials. bad idea. we've now felt bad again for 24 hours. stupid and you knew it. let's be stronger than that. let's brag about how strong we are. you deleted all that shit for a reason. let's forget about it. god mosa, you're a teenage girl at the end of the day. and it's cute but fair warning... those years suck. remember?? oh but I love so hard, oh but my feelings are so big. what a blessing. fuck me. seriously fuck me. I want a big feeling.

my new job is waking up and checking every dating app for new trans cuties and then swiping left on everyone and then being mad. it's GREAT for my mind. it's been so helpful. I feel so settled. I don't feel desperate and crazy AT ALL. can you settle down for one fucking second mosa? would it kill you to be alone?? you did it for 2 years, then after 4 months now you're like AAAAHHHGHH. pathetic.

you're not tho babes. it makes sense. we all want that. everyone you know wants that. and hilariously you're the one who had it most recently. why do you think you're never gonna find it? you're having the most luck! you're having the most sex! ingrate! (jk jk baby. you just got hurt bad.)

I should end this. but it's good to get down the big things. they hurt you. you're mad. you're moving on. it's their loss (classic bs) but you know they feel that too. how do I stop people from falling in love with me they said. and I know the answer, it's don't tell them you're falling in love too. that would help. minimize their own feelings, maximize mine. that fucking sucks. and meanwhile I did the opposite lmfao. I fucking suck. ok now go find love or else you'll have to die

[puppkatt]

quick rushed doodle bc things be Rough as a duosex person (ik not all people vibe with duosex or nullsex, and no I'm not a transmed, but it fits me best). it constantly feels like I'm faking, because I can't transition yet. when people look at me they don't see masculine, only feminine.

I have a chubby, curvy body, a noticeable chest, I am not the skinny androgynous white kid on tiktok who's so perfectly nonbinary. I look and sound like a woman. I don't plan on changing my name either. it's caused me to hate my body, as perfect androgyny is what's expected of me, as well as thinness.

but I'm both a woman and a man. I like my chest and my curves. I want to grow my hair out. one day I'll get testosterone, get bottom surgery, masculinize and feel like I am what I feel I am inside. both. but I can't yet. and that's okay. it's not my body's fault. it's the fault of my transphobic parents and my age.

people are always telling me I have to be the person they want. thin, androgynous, a youngshit (yes unfortunately im still trying to quit the hellhole of 4chan), all these stupid things. otherwise I'm a "trender" or "theyfab" or "tucute"

but I'm me. all of me. those stretch marks and scars (those lines are scars of an emergency surgery I had a bit ago) and bone structure and long eyelashes and curves and hip dips and chub and body hair every single part of me are all, well, a part of me.

and I know that I'm trans. I have dysphoria. I will transition as soon as I'm able bc otherwise I'll probably go insane bc it's been hell so far without it (not that you're not trans if you don't have dysphoria and/or don't transition, I'm just saying I personally do) and nothing anyone says makes that untrue.

we are the only people who can tell ourselves who we are. that goes for anyone reading this too. trans or not. you're you.

and I'm nonbinary. no matter what. I'm me.

sorry for all that ramble just over a shitty doodle, just something I've been struggling with lately

[nocturnalgemstones]

Matpat's "but that's just a theory!" feels comparable to a sexist comedian's or a sexual predator's "it's just a joke!". Or a transphobe going on a transphobic, homophobic rant and tacking on "but that's just my opinion lol" at the end. To breakdown the flawed logic in each of these statements:

"It's just a joke" doesn't absolve you of anything you said because fact that you find sexism and unwanted sexual comments funny is still a problem.

"It's just my opinion" doesn't absolve you of anything you said because it wouldn't be you opinion if you didn't also think it was fact.

"It's just a theory" doesn't absolve you of any of the racist, ableist, transphobic or homophobic things you say in a video because you're still spouting racist, ableist, transphobic and homophobic things...for entertainment.

This is why the "Matpat doesn't believe his own theories!" defense doesn't work and makes him look worse in some cases. Because it changes him from a person who is only ignorantly transphobic and immaturely covers his ears like a fucking child when trans people try to tell him what he did wrong, to a person who is perfectly aware that everything he is saying about minorities is untrue but doesn't care that he's spreading this misinformation to his young audience as long as he can get more views.

(And if Matpat does believe what he's saying...so? If a tumblr user made a theory stating, "I think this canonically mentally ill character is going to snap and kill all their friends", but provided flimsy evidence and basically made it clear that the only reason they even came to this conclusion if because the character is mentally ill, Tumblr would not let them get away with it. So I don't know why this site is so lenient with Matpat, especially considering his larger audience and the amount of influence he has. And how many people in his fanbase are kids.)

[coughloop]

vent/rant post about fash/cryptofash/reactionaries on tumblr under the cut dont reblog

im really frustrated with how things have gone down in the last week and im gonna ramble a lot, also im gonna use fash/cryptofash/reactionary and maybe some other terms pretty interchangeably cause they all feel like umbrella terms for the type of people im talking about.

I know we're all getting tired of blocking the same cryptofash accounts that keep remaking over and over again, as well as new ones that find their ways into the periphery of popular posters and have suddenly shoot into popularity until they post something super racist. And a lot of the time it feels so useless and futile, like half the time they have a backup ready to go and the other half just remake in under 24 hours. and like, what does it even do? its not fighting any real world issues, i have no idea what the social effect of having super racist people 3 degrees of separation from everyone on the site actually means, but I know I really fucking dont like it, I know it makes me super uncomfortable to see a mutuals reblog from someone who constantly reblogs and interacts with people that fantasize about beating up trans people on the street.

and now that people like me and some others are getting more and more savvy about noticing cryptofash blogs, it becomes harder and harder to not see how many people i follow that keep me 3 degrees of separation from them.

take ukrainianbimbo for example. they constantly reblog from terfs, transphobes, racists, misogynists and anti-Semites AS WELL as trans people, Jewish people, and people of colour. i blocked them from following me months ago after spending 30 seconds on their blog and recognizing multiple well known tumblr reactionaries. when they noticed i had blocked them and made a couple posts about how easy it is to not follow and reblog from fascists they went on a posting spree whining about how they dont check who they reblog from and why should it be their responsibility. wah wah wah, shut up. anyway, last week they got properly called out for this behaviour and badgrapple came to their defense, going on the dumbest tirade ive ever seen about how theyre sick of fake callouts for people who havent done anything wrong (tell that to your friend ukrainianbimbo who's reaction to being labelled an anti-Semite and a fascist was to triple down on telling a trans jewish woman that she was ugly and should kill herself (both of these things are very untrue shout out Agent, you dont deserve that at all)) and now both of them are going out of their way to interact with more bigots seemingly as a protest for being repressed over hanging with those types in the first place. Fuck off.

All of this then led into people i respect making random vagueposts like "feel like fash is a word being thrown around way too liberally on tumblr these days" and like, yeah, in a way i guess it is, but also people are acting like fascists! crypto fascists specifically because theyre never completely open about their beliefs. fash is shorter and less confusing however (thanks cryptocurrency for that) so thats what people genuinely call them. Why is that a bad thing? If you're posting things that people look at and say "woah dude, you sound like a fascist", maybe thats on you for doing things that other fascists on this site do, not on them for using the "wrong word" for it.

on top of all this though, people HAVE started making up unchecked callouts about people, like Declan smokeweedinbong, who was unfairly called a fascist by someone because declan responded to a comment on his post he didnt background check, thats totally unfair to declan but fuck the reaction from a lot of my mutuals was REALLY WEIRD. people didnt start posting in defense of declan, who again, did nothing wrong but not pay as much attention to a random person as he could have (ive done that too i get it!), but instead people started beating the "cancel culture has gone to far" drum, fucking again. why is that your response?? defend your friends, please! but why is it people who dont want to be exposed to racists and transphobes and anti-Semites ultimately receiving the pushback? its so dumb!

so now half the time i see someone getting an anon about reblogging from a fash, they respond positively but why do they always get follow up anons like "thats dumb who cares, i never look at who i reblog from" like maybe you fucking should?? shut up! people are so fucking stupid on anon it blows me away soemtimes.

i really have no idea where im going with all this, i just really needed to get this frustration of my chest. thanks for reading my run on sentences if you did, and sorry for being somewhat incoherent, i just am so fucking tired of all this, and it doesnt even mean anything. whatever

[ihopesocomic]

You don't have to answer this, but what are your thoughts on bi/pan lesbians? asking because the recent question you got about shipping lesbians with men reminded me of someone trying you argue that it's okay to ship a lesbian with a man if you hc them as a bi/pan lesbian because "you're not erasing the fact that they're a lesbian", and that just never made sense to me

tw: lesbiphobia, lesbophobia, biphobia, panphobia, transphobia

There's a reason it never made sense to you, its cuz the label doesnt make sense LOL "Bi/pan lesbian" is inherently lesbiphobic/biphobic/transphobic

1) Lesbians by definition have no attraction to men. Implying we can means that the ongoing struggle, of being told we “just haven’t found the right guy” or whatever lesbian-specific discrimination you can imagine that infantalizes our sexuality, means absolutely nothing. It also disregards the compulsory heterosexuality lesbians often experience. It supports (cis straight) men’s beliefs that they "have a chance" when that’s obviously not the case. Men have a snowball’s chance in Satan’s buttcheeks of being with a lesbian romantically or otherwise, and we like them to remember that. Not validated by some made-up label.

2) The deep-rooted bi/panphobia of the label. Like besides the implication that a bi person has ”finally picked a side”. There is no reason for any person who is attracted to men to be ashamed of their m-spec label and to adopt a label that is very specific in its lack of attraction to an entire group of people. Bi/pan people are attracted to men. Lesbians are not. Those things cannot exist in the same label because they directly contradict each other. And I do not think it’s because they don’t know that. I don’t believe anyone is really that foolish. I can’t imagine any reason to have this label other than being ashamed of being attracted to men. There’s this weird slew of people who think lesbians are “more woke” in their lack of attraction to men, or bi/pan people are somehow "better" if they're in a same-gender relationship, and that’s just plain untrue. Even having a preference or whatever doesn't erase your attraction. There is no reason to not proudly express your sexuality. So therefore there’s no reason to take my label for yourself just because you simply can’t use perfectly good already existing labels.

3) And I’ve seen this on a smaller scale, but some people have used this label because they are bi/pan or lesbian, who are dating someone or are attracted to someone who is trans and still on the gender binary or they’re treating nonbinary as a “third gender” (which I’ve stated before is too broad a label to categorize like that). I don’t want to get into speculation of specifics as to why they feel this way, but for whatever transphobic reason you can imagine, they don’t want to let go of the lesbian label, even tho nonbinary people are nonbinary, trans women are women, and trans men are men. And if you are attracted to trans men then you cannot be a lesbian. To say otherwise is transphobic and disrespects their gender. (Like its in the word, it’s not that fucking difficult to comprehend.)

I hope this helps validate your concerns. I’m not gonna suggest telling people off if they don’t respond to reason, I’m just simply making everyone aware about why this label is harmful. Awareness is all I care about. I could really care less about changing minds of people who are being willingly ignorant. - Cat