#but idk maybe i'll at least color this panel or something

[retrogradedreaming]

Little WIP from the thing I'm working on!

I forgot to save the csp file though, so I'm currently redoing half the lineart 🥲

[theblogwithoutfear]

Thoughts on the Ahmed run (spoilers)

I know we're only three issues in, but I thought I'd ramble about the current state of the union

My main complaint is the memory loss story--it's a little disappointing. I was hoping that arc would go further and have a lasting impact on Matt; but he remembers everything so fast. Within the first issue he was back in the suit, and it feels like he moved on so easily from the trauma of everything.

Idk, I think it makes his sacrifice from Zdarsky's run feel a bit meaningless.

However, I'm willing to give it the benefit of the doubt, and wait for a while to see how it goes.

I'm loving Matt as a priest at the group home. It feels a little bit like a nod to the Netflix show, with Sister Maggie and the orphanage. Maybe I'm just reading into that, idk. I realize a lot of people hate when the comics start taking things from the show--but I don't mind in this case. Plus, seeing Matt interact with kids is always a win for me

And the religious overtones/dark imagery? The moral complexity of his head vs. his heart? The duality of what he does in the day vs. the night? Love it. give me more.

I do miss lawyer Matt, though. It's been a hot minute since we've seen that, and I'm really hoping Ahmed will take Matt back to his roots at some point.

I'm torn on the artwork. There are some BEAUTIFUL panels (this one is one of my favorites) and the coloring is so vivid and dynamic. And Matt is hella attractive in this run so far, so that's a big plus

but also, there's something a little too... like... shiny? About everything? Things look polished almost, in a way that's a little weird. Sometimes the faces don't feel very defined.

I also think there's less weight in the artwork. The movement is a lot less dynamic and fluid than the last run. Everything feels a little like it's floating, the punches don't carry much weight, and it just makes everything feel... lower stakes, I guess.

I don't know, I'm a big Checchetto fan, and his artwork felt really solid and grounded. So maybe I'm just still adjusting--I'll give Kuder some time before I really make a judgement call.

Because again, there's still some really beautiful and dynamic things here. He's doing neat things with panel placement/shape, which breaks up the page nicely and has cool effects on the pacing

I've also got mixed feelings about the tonal change thus far. Maybe this is a hot take, but I'm not into quippy Daredevil. I think he functions best as a character when he's really serious. He's usually got a gravitas that really informs the way he conducts himself. The quips in the latest issue take away from that, at least in my opinion.

Then again, Mark Waid made it work really well. Ahmed could very well be trying to do something similar. Again, it's something I'll reserve judgement on. I'm not against a lighthearted Matt, per se. I just think the darkness makes the storytelling so much more compelling and grounded (which is the reason I think people are also tired of the quippy humor in the MCU lately).

I hope the goofiness isn't going to be a long-term thing, but I feel okay about it for the time being. Especially since it's only every so often (at least so far). The run overall still feels fairly gritty and grounded.

I'm intrigued to see where he's going to take Elektra as the Woman Without Fear. I was pleasantly surprised by that arc in the Zdarsky run (wasn't much of an Elektra fan until recently, tbh) and I'm curious to see what's next for her. We haven't seen as much of her as I'd like so far, but hopefully that will change.

All that being said, I'm actually really enjoying this run so far. I'm not enjoying it quite as much as Zdarsky, but I still think it's really excellent. Ahmed's doing some interesting things with the character, and I'm really excited to see where he takes it.

Anyway, I'm curious to know if anyone else has thoughts on the run thus far. Opinions? Thoughts? Vehement disagreements?

(bonus picture because I'm obsessed with the priest vigilante look)

[sayakxmi]

[Magi reread] Night 73: Rukh's Will

I feel like this shot looks a little better.

The only valid reaction at this point ngl.

Literally never paid enough attention to realize there are human silhouettes

Well, NOW I can tell

Cute, and tbh I'm absolutely reading too much into this, but Aladdin looks kinda sad, so I suspect he KNOWS.

Alibaba thinking about Cassim;;;

Anise genes are strong af. All Rashid gave Alibaba is hair color, the horn and insecurity.

That. Smile.

YEET

Love it, but it also makes me think that the pairings go as follows: Alibaba (Amon's a Heat Djinn) + Aladdin (Heat Magician), Kougyoku (Vinea's a Water Djinn) + Judar (Water Magician) and Hakuryuu (Zagan & Belial are both Lfie Djinns) + Titus (Life Magician). Idk, made me think about combos when I read that, and it's kinda funny that all the main KVs have a fitting Magi.

RIP Sinbad

Alibaba... really tends to get caught by some weird tentacles, huh.

Bye

This action will have severe consequences.

Like, seriously, do you ever think how if Judar hadn't been shown this by Aladdin, he probably wouldn't have left Al-Thamen for real & team up with Hakuryuu? Like, maybe he would've, but he would've been still under Al-Thamen's control in some ways, like, I doubt he would've put his all into supporting Hakuryuu. Before that he was just vibing. Now he has a goal and it's revenge, which is what unites them later on. Not to mention, Judar was kinda Meh magician before (probably cuz Al-Thamen, I recall some extra abt him having to practice magic in secret), so he would've been much weaker.

Anyway, all I'm saying is, Aladdin created his own most powerful adversary, and I think that's neat. Wouldn't have it any other way.

Enlightened. In the worst way.

The more you look at these panels, the sadder it gets. And I'm starting to think about them more, and I'm starting to get sadder, too. Like. Lil Judar reaching towards his father. His dad is crying, his mom, too, but she's smiling, probably trying to console him. Do you think lilttle Judar is crying, because he can tell something is wrong? Or maybe he's laughing, because he doesn't fully realize the danger?

Did he reach him just in time to get killed? Oh my god.

There's blood on his blanket. His parents' blood. God.

No shit dude gets immediate breakdown, who wouldn't.

Man, I didn't come here to be sad for Judar.

THAT'S what I'm here for. Oh man.

What do I even say

What a fucking mess, man

The thing is. I don't think Alibaba's ever suspected that Cassim actually hated him. Least of all that he hated him the most. Their relationship was a mess, and Alibaba knew it was a mess, like, since post-palace Cassim had treated him awfully from what we've seen. There's no way Alibaba didn't understand at least that Cassim was angry with him. But to actually hate him? And what's more...

...to hate him since they were kids? If it started later, then at least Alibaba could've reasoned it in some way, like after Mariam's death, because Alibaba was gone when they needed him etc, but sinec they were kids? What had Alibaba done to earn this? If it's not something he'd done, then the only thing left is that it was just... him. That Cassim hated him for the way he was.

Which is exactly what it is. I'll never get over their (and also Hakuryuu & Alibaba, bc they share some similarities) mess of a relationship. Because as much as Cassim hates Alibaba, he loves him just as much. It probably infuriates him even more.

Sorry for sending the entire page, but I'm near photo limit, so I had to make some changes.

The sheer irony is that half of the time it was Cassim keeping him safe. Because the fucker couldn't make up his heart whether he really wanted Alibaba ruined or to remain as pure as possible. God.

Bro's traumatized. Can't blame him. Imagine the last living member of your family who's also been your best friend since forever & you love him more than anything & you spent half of your life confused about him betraying you and then justifying that, because you cannot even consider an idea that he could've actually wanted to hurt you, only for him to just say straight to your face that nah he hates your guys and wants to fuck you up as much as possible.

The root of Cassim's anger is his self-hatred, and that just breaks me a little. His self-loathing is just that bad, and the world made him feel like trash, and so did the trauma, and so did his childhood near Alibaba who'd had an opportunity to be a happy kid unlike him, just reminding him how different they were. Man.

Can we just talk how Aladdin is in the middle of fighting Judar & he still does everything he can to guide Alibaba?

Neat image.

And that's the horrifying part. The fact that these are his real feelings. And it will hurt. But only Alibaba can do something about it now.

I fucking love this image. And the whole, "You're my candidate to be king!". Like, Aladdin is embracing his role of a Magi, now that he truly understands it, and he chooses Alibaba. Because of course he does. And the contrast between Alibaba and Cassim... Ughh, that's the good stuff.

I could probably talk more, but I have to go now, but anyway, man, I love this series.

[mimiatmidnight]

I love your new layout <3 so pretty! Any fashion prediction on Meghan's appearance in NY in DEC?

Aw thank you! 🥰 I figured, hell it's been long enough, time to grow up and finally install an actual theme lol.

For the gala, what I predict and what I want are two very different things haha. I tried to flip through some photos from this event's previous years to get a vibe, and it seems there is quite a range in the dress code of the attendees. Some of the women are in full formal evening wear and some are in, like, barely business casual. However, Meghan has proved in the past that she's not afraid of being the most overdressed person in the room, so let's cross our fingers that she holds true to that this year! (And promise that if you read through this long post full of evening gowns, and then she shows up in a pantsuit, none of you will make fun of me for dreaming 😭)

So let's start with the more boring, safe options. Meg has mostly not been one for extravagant appliques or patterns or textures. Especially in recent years, she seems to have favored simple, solid swathes of fabric that instead bring their interest with rich, vibrant colors, and occasionally a unique tailoring detail. If she follows this same path next month, I hope at least she shakes things up with a color we haven't seen on her yet, like the options I've got here from a mix of brands, including both Meg-fave brands and new-to-Meg brands.

Starting with Safiyaa, we've got this fun hot pink Barbie moment; a very regal periwinkle; a lovely pale yellow; this soft pink that she's worn several times before in a warmish beige tone, but instead in this cooler-toned variety that I'd be curious to see her in; and this lush mint look that is certainly a well-worn silhouette for her, but with an interesting new neckline paneling.

Here are more options with the same idea as above, just from other brands outside Safiyaa. There's a Zuhair Murad in a brilliant orange, which she's never worn before; a Romona Keveza in royal purple; a Carolina Herrera in yellow-gold; a sort of Little Mermaid-esque ombré moment from The Danes New York; a Halston in bubblegum pink that I think would be so flattering on her; and finally, another dress from Carolina Herrera, that I'm pretty sure I picked just because it fondly reminds me of her famous 2019 red and purple look.

Now for the more fun, day-dreamer options. I'm hoping for GLITZ. It's been sooooooooo long since we've seen her in something sparkly, so here are some exciting pieces that I could still sOmEwHaT realistically see her picking out to wear herself. My top pick is this glittering dream (with my favorite, PLEATS!!) from Paolo Sebastian AW22-23. I could also easily see her in this silver-rooted look from Georges Hobeika FW22-23. (I think it's reminding me of something she wore in the past, but I'm not sure what. Maybe a mixture of her ODLR bird dress and the Safiyaa halter she wore to Royal Variety? Idk)

I'll admit that these next two are less about realistic expectations, and more about squealing "OOH SPARKLY!!!" First, a column of pure glitter gold from Naeem Khan F22. Next, a festive emerald JUMPSUIT (!) from Elie Saab FW22-23.

Bringing this back a bit closer to earthly expectations, I've got these options in descending order of formality, so it depends on how dressy Meg is feeling. We've got an elegant splattered gown, again from Naeem Khan F22; a lovely pleated dress with gold foil detailing from Marchesa Notte; and last but not least, if she absolutely must revert to her favorite look of all-black pants, why not jazz it up with some fun sleeve paneling, like this jumpsuit from Safiyaa.

And to finish this whole thing off, just because I'm so charmed by the idea of predicting these two side-by-side, a blazing flame by Elie Saab and a mesmerizing ripple of water from Rene Ruiz.

And that's my list! Anyways, see y'all next month when, with my luck, Meg shows up in slacks.

[frogsandfries]

This is going insanely better

The tension is so even, it has almost no flex, which is better than the first one. I'm very excited about the bottom of this box being much more stable than my first box. The curveball I threw myself was that I may have chosen about two too many colors. Firstly, only four fit on my work surface, but second, I had to label little pieces of masking tape with the corresponding symbols to identify the colors. Luckily the first and last colors are the least used, so I can just pour myself a couple when it comes time for them and put any extras back right away. But the main four, I've poured a little of two colors into one rows and the others in the second row, and put the labeled containers next to the little piles of beads. Maybe eventually I'll get like some of those diamond painters that have a bunch of trays of drills spread out in front of them, but with seed beads.

In lesser news, I'm newly not sure I chose the right colors. These two darker blues are seeming to bead up very similar in color, and somehow the lighter beads feel like they're doing the same. But I'm just going to trust the process. Experimenting with patterns is fun, but it's more important to get good at building these containers. And even if this goes poorly, I'll learn something about how colors function in different arrays of beads.

Total aside, but one of the cool things about ordering from Fire Mountain is the freebies. They sent me some glass shell beads with this AB finish in the texture. I'll have to take a picture of them. It's too tempting to figure out how to make them into feet for this box. The problem with Fire Mountain is, I think what I paid for the amount of beads that I actually got was too expensive. It remains to be seen. I managed, I'm pretty sure, to find the vendor who originally sold me those 15/0 seed bead color mixes aaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllllllllll the way back in 2013. I'm eager to purchase from this vendor again.

On another, other note, I also can't wait till payday. I really want to start stocking up on beads for a lantern that I'm eager to weave up. I'm taking inspiration from Beadflower UK, but I want to do a more irregular lantern shape, and I do love the idea of the changeable windows, so I could do like, butterflies for one set and maybe Halloween or silhouettes or something. I thought the Disney Aurora and the prince dancing silhouette might be cool, maybe for two window panels. Idk something like that. There's this one metallic color that only seems to come in size 11/0, but I will hardly let that deter me. I might do some kind of gradient or mix, but really, I'm so stoked about the idea of making those windows. These clear beads are so fucking cooooool. I can NOT wait to see them in action.

I'm eager to see how far I can get with just some regular fishing line.

[oveliagirlhaditright]

I feel like you can't really say that Angel is uninteresting, when you haven't seen his own show and therefore have only scratched the surface of his character. But that's your point of view and right, so I can't fault you for it, either.

I completely disagree about the Angel and Spike stuff, personally. Though I'll admit that I've sort of been becoming anti-Spike some lately, so that's surely coloring my perspective here.

But here's my perspective on it all (though if you don't want to see any negative looks at Spike, you might want to stop reading now):

With the whole "a soul was forced on Angel" thing "and Spike chose to fight for one," I feel that that's not really a fair argument. In Angel's case, I feel it's more what he chose to do with it after he got it. I mean, yeah: he didn't choose it. But neither did Buffy choose to be the Slayer. But when they were both forced into these positions they didn't want, they then chose to make the most of it and be heroes. And that says a lot about them. This is even an intentional parallel between Buffy and Angel that ties them together.

As for the Spike choosing to get a soul thing... a large part of me feels like he did so for selfish reasons: So Buffy would then have to forgive him for the attempted rape thing, and quite possibly finally love him. Since the main thing she could never get around with him was that he didn't have a soul.

Like, these comic panels kind of confirm my belief that Spike went to get his soul to try and win Buffy, not for any moral reasons. At least partly. And it also strongly makes it seem like he was trying to copy Angel. Maybe in thinking that Buffy loved Angel more/truly loved Angel? And that if he was more like Angel, she might actually go for him? IDK. (Edit: Though in Spike's defense in the above panels, he is drunk there.)

And then when Spike does get his soul... I mean, he does do good with it, yeah. He helps with the daily battles and apocalypses. But it's nothing he's really driven to do. It's not something he really cares about, like it is for Buffy and Angel.

Furthermore, Angel is always haunted by and trying to make up for all the deaths that he caused in the past... and Spike just isn't?

When his soul is first returned to him, he does feel awful about it those weeks he's in that basement. And he even tries to rip his soul out, so he no longer has to feel the torment for his sins. There's also when Spike realizes that he can be possessed by the First, that he's trying to convince Buffy to kill him--because he realizes what a danger he can be and that Buffy has never met the real soulless him... but then that all just disappears. (And if I'm being honest, I feel like even what we got there probably isn't as severe as it could've been/should've been. And it's nothing at all like it was for Angel. As Angel says in Angel the series, "I spend a hundred years tryin' to come to terms with infinite remorse. You spent three weeks moaning in a basement, and then you were fine.")

In Angel season five, Angel and Spike somehow get into some sort of argument about Angel's past sins (or perhaps both of their past sins together), and Angel finishes the conversation off by saying something like, "and I'm paying for it every day." And then Spike replies with something like, "And you should stop with that, mate. You're starting to look haggard." (Clearly, he's not worrying about any of that at all.) This episode does end with Spike starting to care (or to care again. Because he was caring in season seven, but then it went away, when he went to Angel season five), when the team loses Fred (someone that Spike had come to care greatly about), and we get this quote from him, "...For a demon, I never did think that much about the nature of evil. No. Just threw myself in. Thought it was a party. I liked the rush, I liked the crunch. Never did look back at the victims." And I love this quote a ton. It's just a wonderfully written one, overall and James Marsters plays it beautifully. And I adore that he is starting to look back here (again?) and think about all of this. But it does show us that until here, he didn't

But, once again... when we get into the comics, he doesn't ponder this stuff. At all.

And he absolutely should be! Because Spike is the second most sadistic vampire to ever walk the Earth, after Angelus. Something both the fans and the writers often forget. If Angel needs to be thinking about his past victims and making amends, Spike most definitely needs to be, too!

Which is why I really appreciated when in Kendare Blake's "In Every Generation" book, this one demon (who's actually good? And helping Willow's daughter, who's the new Slayer) challenges Watcher!Spike (who's still a vampire) about something he said--and his whole attitude--by saying, "And just because you have a soul now, that automatically makes you good and no longer accountable for your past sins?" To which Spike sobers up and feels a lot of remorse for his past actions and says, "No, it doesn't." Like, jeez. Why do I think this book written AGES after the show--by someone who's not a show writer!--with this one line is getting into things with souled-Spike the show definitely should have; and even doing some better work with him than they did?

Though I do understand that some of this stuff with Spike probably happened to keep from turning Angel and Spike completely into the same character. Like, I guess after James Marsters heard that Spike was going to get a soul, he came to Joss all excited about it, with ideas for a show for him and apparently Joss just looked at James and said, "And what will we call this show, James? 'Angel?'"

But with all that being said... the way they handled Spike once he got a soul, I can't help feeling Angel's the better person.

Like, I see it like this: Human Spike versus human Angel? Spike's the better person, for sure Angelus vs. Spike? Spike's the better person, hands-down. Chipped Spike vs. Angel? This one's a little tricky... but I'm saying Angel's better, for some of the things I said above. And because chipped Spike tried to rape Buffy. And the narrative tries to tell us things like, "If Spike didn't have the chip in his head, he'd be out hunting humans," even though Spike is starting to become great here and undergoing monumental growth. Souled Angel vs. Souled Spike? Souled Angel is better than Souled Spike to me for all the things previously mentioned. -shrugs- But that's just my personal opinion.

You know... I've often been wondering lately if part of the reason for Angelus' name change from Angelus to Angel when he goes from evil to good is partly inspired by the Bible (and I don't think I've ever seen anyone else discuss this. I think the closest I've seen is this really amazing fic I read on fanfiction, that explores the emotional upheaval and whole journey Angelus/Angel went through first ensouled, that was very much Biblically themed, and ended with him realizing that the old must pass away and "another story must begin," to quote Les Mis here; and him then coming up with his new name. But it didn't go as far as to tying in the Biblical name changes).

Because while the creator of the series, Joss Whedon, is atheist and both Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel the Series definitely have atheist themes, there are for sure Christianity ties going on with Angel's character. I mean, duh. Look no further than what his name is.

But for those who don't know... a number of times in the Bible, people are renamed (quite a few times something similar to the name that they already had--like Abram becoming Abraham or his wife Sarai being renamed Sarah--not unlike Angelus being altered to Angel). And often times it is after that person has undergone a huge transformation. And the name change is almost as if to truly add to that--as if to say, "you really aren't that person you once were anymore." (I guess I should also note that it's not only in the Bible that this happens, but the Abrahamic faiths in general. But since I think that it's really Christianity that the writers were writing about with Angel's character, that's what I'm focusing on here.)

But evidence that Christianity--or perhaps faith in general--is central to Angel's character, of course: Angel--Liam, actually--as he was known back then, was born in Galway, Ireland in 1727. And the area at the time was largely Catholic, I do believe. And Liam, no differently, was from a very Catholic family. But he couldn't live up to his family's expectations--and was a huge disappointment to them (particularly his father)--as he was lazy, drank a lot, whored, etc. All of this culminated in him meeting Darla one night, who of course turned him. And with the rage he still felt towards his family, he ended up killing them all (his mother, father, and sister. Though this isn't really a surprise in the Buffyverse, as most newly turned vampires end up slaughtering their family members: probably for any grudges they might have against them, and because the family probably won't know you've been changed and you have easy access to them, and thus are easy first kills. I should also probably mention that for anyone reading this who might not know the Buffyverse, all vampires in this series have no souls). But the way he got an invitation into his house, is because his little sister invited him in, thinking he was the angel of her brother returned to them (because they had thought Liam died, as he'd been missing for days). And this is when he comes up with the idea to call himself Angelus. Can you say religious trauma?

Angelus eventually ends up siring someone named Penn--his first childe--who sort of obsesses over Angelus, and becomes a copycat killer of his. Way in the future (in the 2000s), when Angel is calling himself "Angel" and has a soul and is good--and is trying to make amends for all of his past crimes--Penn is in L.A., where Angel is and murdering people the way Angelus used to (because he learned his craft from Angelus and never changed his ways, nor had any desire to). After he brutally kills people, he carves crosses into their cheeks. Kate Lockley, a police detective trying to profile the killer, thinks that the suspect might be a religious fanatic. But Angel says that it's the opposite of that: that this is a mockery of God. This also tells us, of course, what Angelus himself was thinking when he was doing these things himself. And perhaps another reason why he chose the name Angelus.

But despite all of this, despite Liam/Angelus/Angel in whichever incarnation he's in clearly having religious trauma, it's clear that he actually still holds to some Catholic beliefs. It's an interesting case. He definitely believes in God--and in the comics, Xander (finally trying to offer an olive branch to Angel) mentions how therapy has actually helped him out a lot, since he's had repressed anger over the years that he didn't know how to deal with and is now figuring it out, and that Angel should maybe try that; but Angel says that he would rather go to church (not in a sarcastic way, but something that sounded like he actually wanted to do... even though it could potentially hurt him as a vampire, with the crosses there)--and with the soul, he tries to make amends and do what is deemed right there. And he's looking for redemption and forgiveness, however you want to look at that, which could be in a religious sense or perhaps not. (Also, it's definitely hinted at that one of the reasons that he didn't just kill himself after regaining his soul, so he wouldn't have to suffer the torment of dealing with the guilt of all the horrific stuff he'd done for more than a hundred years, was because he believed people who committed suicide went to Hell, and he didn't want to go to Hell.)

But at the same time, Angel will say things like, "I never had much love for preachers," after decking an evil one in the face and coming to Buffy's rescue there. It's very interesting.

Angel's journey and relationship with all of this is interesting.

He himself is very interesting.

Edit: I don't know if I got across the point I'm trying to make here. It's like this: as Angelus, circumstances beforehand had led him to be very anti-religion (and that's putting it lightly) and he showed his hate by it with his name and by mocking God in the way he went about his murders. But then when he got his soul, he was no longer atheist at all. And really, probably never had been. And all of a sudden, it's like, "What have I done? Sweet Jesus, what have I done?" to steal another quote from Jean Valjean's Soliloquy from the Les Mis musical. And he begins drowning. But when he eventually surfaces and realizes he needs to try and aim for accountability and change himself (including his name), he does so in the way the saints themselves did, in how they changed their names: the saints he's probably now trying to be like himself.

Does that make sense? Man, I really hope I managed to get everything across that time, but I'm still not sure.