#but i wanted her to have some visual motif to represent her connection with the black lagoon and water

[karmathenightowl]

Elizabeth the Sports Druid is an icon 🏀❤️

[el-bellanaris]

I find the fandom consensus that Solas and the Inquisitor going into the fade at the end of Veilguard being an eternal "banishment" really interesting because at least for me I feel like it ignores what the ending is supposed to mean for Solas overall. Solas in Veilguard is finally at the crossroads in his life that some other Inquisition companions and advisors were at in DAI. I mention Inquisition specifically because for me his journey is so much more reflected and connected with them, his journey might take two games but it narratively fits so well within the scope of Inquisition. 

Anyway as the player character, we are given the choice that will define the fate of these characters based on our emotions and logic and this will become the canon choice of that particular world state. For Solas, we aren’t told much information about his future and the results of his choice but we are shown it through visual motifs and more directly through the difference in the pair of remnants left behind by Mythal. We have the remnant that exists in the crossroads and has lived the last couple thousand years existing in a static state never leaving and never growing past her past. The other remnant existed inside Flemeth and we were told by Morrigan in Veilguard that this remnant was able to love and live many lives experiencing the world and living more fluidly.

Our choice is based on our opinion of Solas but the outcome is reflected in what it means for him and if your choice will have him continue the cycle and stay in a static existence without growth or go forward into a future full of new experiences, change and growth. If you fight him you are continuing the cycle of violence, leading to Solas to become as bad as the Evanuris and becoming static - stuck in his ways and as a result likely stuck in the prison of regret that he may never escape from because he refuses to grow. Thus Solas becomes like Elgar'nan and the other evanuris and Rook becomes like Solas in replaying the cycle of history of what happened when the veil was created. 

If you trick him and best him fairly in a battle of wits, Rook becomes his equal, his proper opponent on the chess board rather than just a piece on Solas's board. The cycle breaks because Solas has to come to terms with the fact that he has lost, this results in change that is confronting for Solas but he takes it with grace and falls into a brighter future. 

The last choice, the compassionate ending where Solas is able to confront his past but also be comforted towards the future by the Inquisitor, regardless of whether or not he romanced them will result in Solas actively and freely walking away from his plan and the game he has been playing against and with Rook. The cycle is broken, there are no winners or losers except the Inquisitor who vowed to change his mind and of course a Inquisitor who said that their love would endure. They are the winners here. (Obviously everyone has their opinions on if their love did endure for them personally so this is more so just me describing the facts presented in the game if that ending is chosen)

This ending is also representative of Solas finally reaching the moment that Cullen, Blackwall and the Iron Bull were able to reach where they could find themselves putting down their duty and moving forward with something new. All 4 of them are bound to some kind of organisation or duty be it the templars, the ben-hassarath, Blackwall’s duty to his lie and guilt or in Solas's case the revolutionary for his people. The other three in Inquisition were able to become something new, something in their heart they wanted to be but had to be confronted with the mortifying truth of facing themselves and following a new path. Solas doesn't get the exact clarity in his endings that these three characters get, however he does actively state that he will go to atone and then calm the anger of the blight.

He, like these other three and the remnant of Mythal that left their old lives behind, will now walk on a completely new path. So for me it felt incredibly clear that he would not be stuck in any way anymore because of this and being bound to the prison eternally would not even be an outcome on this path even if he is to go back there first. This ending is about completely forging something new for him, something that requires him to confront himself and accept himself entirely. And the Inquisitor is here as not a prisoner with him, but rather someone to join him on the path he is to take next.

So when people say the pair of them will make the prison into a home or just generally only seem to see a future for them in that prison by themselves I find myself compelled to ask why? Why would the ending that's about breaking the cycle and very visibly showing Solas making the choice for himself and freely walking into the future be one that leads to another eternal permanent state of being. It ignores the idea of what this ending means and I think focuses slightly too heavily on taking the ending slides just as face value. 

The choices you make as the person holding the controller/mouse happen in tandem with what you didn't choose. So they all exist as possible outcomes and you can occasionally get more information from viewing other choices then just focusing on the one you made. When you are given the ending slide for the romanced Inquisitor that follows him into the fade we are shown them hugging, with Solas who has shed his armour and is wearing an outfit akin to what he wore when he was at Skyhold. Aka when he is at home, at rest. This ending shows him at rest with the Inquisitor and we are told they are reunited and their story has come to an "end."

Now it's easy to get tunnel vision and only view this ending and think oh they're just in the fade forever, but if you view the others, especially the ones for where you trick or fight Solas they specifically show Solas falling into the fade. This is important because it shows the direct result of your choice through how he enters the fade and is indicative of the future that will follow for him. In one we see Solas falling into darkness because the cycle of violence continues and in the other Solas falls into a brighter future because he accepts defeat. So for the romanced ending it's not representing their permanent state of being but rather showing us the direct result of Solas entering the fade in the same way the other two I mentioned are. He doesn't fall; rather he finds himself stable, standing up and able to accept the Inquisitor's love in an embrace in a moment alone. That's what he does first, not what they do for an eternity. In the non-romanced option he is actively walking to a brighter future with his staff in hand and dressed ready to approach his next challenge. This is likely what he will do next in the other future too just with the Inquisitor at his side this time but after he gets his bearings and they are able to move forward together.

When I see people say well what about the Inquisitor's life, why is she throwing it away for a man or what about her friends and family deciding that it's absolutely certain she will never see them again I am again compelled to ask why. They are entering a bright future together, and that bright future is defined by you ultimately. For one thing, time in the fade serves to be convenient to the narrative it is in. Rook was in there for a couple hours but in the real world weeks had passed which I assumed was because that was how long the group needed to make the dagger and successfully be able to free Rook. For the Inquisitor they spend hours in the fade in a quest and return within minutes because they were needed in the real world to make a choice about the Wardens that evening. So if you believe wholeheartedly that your Inquisitor would never abandon the world right now there's no reason why the fade wouldn't let them out in whatever time is most convenient for the imagined future for your character. Maybe the two of them spend weeks healing the anger of the titan's dreams and then return to this world in an hour. Let's not forget these are two people who rarely sit on their ass and just wait for the world to fix itself. The minute Solas was out of the prison he was out there in Minrathous fighting Elgarn'arn and Ghila'nain whilst protecting the people of the city. The Inquisitor is helping lead the efforts against the blight in three different countries based on their letters so why wouldn't either of them join the forces to help the world heal. Neither of them understand rest truly, so this moment of love together with them is likely just a quick break in between making their next steps. 

In terms of where they end up, I personally believe any ending that shows Solas entering the golden part of the fade indicates both a brighter future for him but means he will not enter that prison again. There is no need to, the prison is figuratively a representation of Solas being trapped by his regrets and unable to move forward so when he walks forward into a new future this prison now has no hold on him. Even when he is tricked, I think accepting defeat is enough to free him. He would just need longer to find his bearings and move forward but still would not need the prison anymore. We see light in these endings and the only places that are bright and full of light in the fade are the Dread wolf’s crossroads and the lighthouse so most likely he is returning to one of those places. Especially when in the non-romanced compassion ending he is dressed differently and has his staff he would need to acquire from the lighthouse. The Black City is also the closest I’ve ever seen it when viewed from inside the crossroads so it would make sense for him to reach it from there.

To end this very long post I will say that even though we aren’t told exactly what happens to Solas and the Inquisitor in the end I will stand by the fact that this game isn’t telling us they are banished to be alone in a prison forever. The game doesn’t tell us everything in words, rather it frequently relies on themes, imagery, actions and our own interpretations to make up the rest however so much is said to us and I wanted to write it all out somewhere for my own sanity really.

[atamascolily]

Analysis: Alleyway Scene, Rebellion

After Sayaka rescues Homura from Mami, their conversation plays out in a souped-up version of the alleyway where Sayaka first met Kyouko in the anime. But first the original version appears briefly in a montage of landscape shots to indicate the passage of time between Homura's first day at school and the first conversation with Madoka in the park.

This is also where Homura broke up that fight, so staging the conversation here is an interesting move on Sayaka's part. She's taking advantage of the labyrinth to re-enact the past, now taking the role of the experienced veteran.

Like all of the spaces in the false Mitakihara, the alleyway responds subconsciously to Homura's thoughts and emotions, so instead of the straightforward line above, we get a series of panels that can shift and rotate in space.

In keeping with Sayaka's musical theme, both versions still have the "instrument motif" on the walls (confirmed as such in the Rebellion Production Note) - the Puella Magi wiki also notes the resemblance to the "Hof der Elemente" in the Art Courtyard Passage in Dresden, Germany. So it's also representing water as well.

Sayaka using her sword to open the lock and release Homura is laying the groundwork for her using the same trick on Homura's shield.

This scene does a lot of fun things with reflections and upside down imagery, but using the sheen on Sayaka's sword right before she sheathes it is so creative. Note the wavy edge, like the ocean, where the glare is. Also note Homura is upside down and falling (this appears to be a recurring motif in WnK trailers).

Like cats, magical girls always land on their feet. Homura does a little flip (circular motion!) first.

Homura is backdropped by red, Sayaka by blue. The cityscape in the Homura shots is very similar to what we see in Walpurgis no Kaiten trailer with the reddish light--fitting since Homura is dominant there. There is also a giant moon, which is associated with Homura--it round and marks the passage of time (each of her loops is approximately one month).

If you're thinking "how can an alleyway have 3 different views?" it's because this is actually a crossroads, both literally and metaphorically. Homura is deciding what she wants to do and where she wants to go and also who she wants to be. All of these questions are interconnected in the world that is also her soul.

I think the panels rotated in-between shots, which aligns with the spacial wonkiness in previous scenes--but it's also supposed to be disorienting, both to Homura and to us. The moon is also moving way too fast as well - compare the shot above to this one with the moon directly above them.

As you can see, the reflections change from moment to moment--sometime reflecting stars and sometimes the alleyway pipes. Some of this is due to changing camera angles and some of it is good old reality wonkiness. As the conversation progresses, the puddles get weirder and weirder... only to distort as Homura realizes Oktavia is directly below her.

For what it's worth, the Rebellion Production Note says this is not Oktavia but Homura's memory of Oktavia, which is why she has her original series form rather than her new form that we see in the battle against Homulilly later. If I understand correctly, Homura is "filling in the gaps" by hallucinating what ought to be there because she can't perceive Oktavia directly.

It seems like Sayaka is doing her own reality-warping to (at least temporarily) counter Homura's, or at least that's how Homura and the audience interprets it.

After she stops time, Homura pulls away the sheet, revealing the illusion. Everything is now blue, as Sayaka gets the "last word" visually as well as orally. The discarded cape is also the "bridge" connecting this scene to the next, as Homura reflects.

One of the many profound ironies of this scene is that in the end, Homura does exactly what Sayaka advises her to do--she traps everyone in her remade world, and maintains the status quo--only Sayaka is furious. In some ways, this makes Sayaka a hypocrite, but I would argue no more so than Homura--they each change their minds and adapt the other's original position by the end. The difference, of course, is the scale and the stakes--Sayaka is happy to play around and get a second chance as long as it's a separate bubble and not the entire universe, whereas Homura is the exact opposite.

The circular structure of Rebellion means that every scene has a counterpart elsewhere in the film and this is one of the more obvious pairings.

[aliensupersyn]

Love, Isolation, and Heavenly Restrictions

"Love is worthless" Sukuna vs. "I don't have a heart" Maki.

NOTICE: This was written after the end of 251, weeks before 253's serialization.

TLDR: My case for why Maki will play a pivotal role in killing Sukuna, and showing how her character arc has led to this exact moment. In other words, she's gonna humble the King of Curses. Skip to section four if you don't care for a summary of their combined arcs. Here's the reddit thread if you're into that sort of thing.

I. Fate

Love and isolation have been major motifs throughout JuJutsu Kaisen, mainly concerning Sukuna and Gojo; both these characters satisfy a fateful premise in jujutsu: the existence of the strongest sorcerer of a generation or era. Sukuna, Kashimo, and Gojo all hold the title of "strongest sorcerer" for their respective eras, and for the sake of this post, I will call it a fateful role.

I say fate because Tengen and the omniscient narrator refer to fate as something real that connects certain roles throughout the different eras. For example, it has been Kenjaku's fate to be stopped by a six eyes user.

Toji's existence as an anomaly beyond the power of jujutsu allowed him to break the chains of fate and change the world. By killing the star plasma vessel, something fate was constantly protecting, he opened the doors for Kenjaku to complete his ludicrous plan of merging all Japanese citizens with Tengen.

II. Visual motifs between Toji, Maki, Gojo, and Sukuna

The main (obvious) connections between Toji and Maki:

While Naoya was an idiot, his comparison between Gojo and Toji was not random and should be acknowledged. He recognized the two of them as being the pinnacles of strength. Though, Naoya did not have the sense to understand what Toji and Gojo represented: jujutsu and the rejection of it. Naoya could never occupy the space that Toji and Gojo did. Not only due to his lack of power, but also because he doesn't have the same Heavenly Restriction that Toji and Maki share. Moreso, Toji and Maki represent the antithesis of the strongest sorcerer by being the strongest beings beyond jujutsu sorcery.

Toji, and Maki by extension, have been narratively connected to Gojo, who satisfies the fateful role of strongest sorcerer. Toji's connection to Gojo mirrors Maki's connection to Sukuna. The backstab in 251 seals this connection between the two pairs (will come back to this).

Gojo thinks of the last time he's ever feared loss, and remembers Toji. I believe Sukuna will have a similar moment where he fears loss by Maki's hands which will mirror this page.

Gege has left little crumbs throughout the story connecting Toji and Gojo, depicting Toji to be the antithesis to jujutsu, and finally connecting Toji and Maki. While that's commonly understood, I don't think enough people respect the fact that Toji, Gojo, and Maki's connection meets Sukuna in the end. Gege has tied all four of them together in the narrative, and that's sure to have some major payoff.

III. Love and Isolation

Yorozu, Kashimo, and Gojo all misunderstand Sukuna as being lonely, the latter two projecting their feelings of dejection onto him.

Gojo and Kashimo's sentiments were useless, as Sukuna completely rejects love and calls it worthless. He's not lonely because he's the strongest, he's the strongest because he's alone! Sukuna has evolved past being a human who needs love and he does only what satisfies his own desires. He eats what he wants, he kills what he wants, and he makes anything his own amusement if he wishes to. Sukuna represents a completely selfish outlook that takes and rarely gives. The only thing Sukuna gives is death, and even that he withholds from people who do not interest him.

While Maki appears as being cold, she still cares for her friends. Even before her and Mai made up, she still showed love for her sister, but refused to belittle herself for the sake of their relationship. Maki represents a person who refuses to allow love to hold her back.

Even though Maki gained new powers after Mai's sacrifice, she still could not reach her full potential because she was modeling herself after sorcerers, which she can never be. Maki and Toji can see curses, but relying on her vision only held her back. Her last fight with Naoya was about her finally breaking away from jujutsu's holds and becoming free. First she cleansed her family tree, her namesake that literally connected her to jujutsu, then she freed herself from thinking like a sorcerer altogether.

Finally, she became a demonic fighter. While she appears cold, she still cares for others. She doesn't regret Mai's fate, but instead embraces it and their relationship. Maki's still a heartless fighter, but one who can express care and concern for her allies. She's selfish enough to refuse to allow others to hold her back, but loving enough to protect those she cares about. Sukuna similarly refuses to be held back by love, and therefore cannot be lonely. Maki exists somewhere in the same realm of being loveless, but not nearly as much as Sukuna.

While the two of them share a heartless attitude and a monstrous demeanor, they exist as complete opposite beings. Sukuna's the greatest and strongest model of jujutsu, and Maki's the absolute antithesis of sorcery. Both of them stand alone in their respective extremes, and again, are alone because they are the strongest. Maki's vision of curses, her last remaining connection to jujutsu was hindering her ability to grow stronger; she was blind to her own abilities because of sorcery. Gege makes it obvious that Toji and Maki break the rules of sorcery. Meaning, Maki will be Sukuna's downfall.

IV. Maki's Advantages Over Sukuna

Toji and Maki are the only two of their kind to ever exist. Therefore, Sukuna has never fought a being, a monster like Maki in his entire life. Megumi never found out about Toji or his abilities, so Sukuna still does not have a reference for Maki's abilities. He may be able to recount Megumi's fight against him, that's very limited information, especially because Toji was not full strength. Maki has the element of surprise.

Maki's backstab leaves many questions. The narrator specifies that Sukuna should have been able to sense a sorcerer performing the backstab, but he failed to sense Maki; she is not a sorcerer, but an anomaly, a monster who is not beholden to jujutsu or sorcery. Sukuna's lack of awareness could be because he's been weakened, but he's failed to notice Maki before.

Many people misinterpret this panel to be Sukuna surprised by Maki's aura, but I disagree and argue that he's shocked that he cannot sense her. Both Yuji and Sukuna are suprised by her sudden appearance. Due to Maki not having any cursed energy, Sukuna cannot sense her power and will be forced to rely on sight to find her. Yet, Maki needs neither sight nor cursed energy to fight curses. Maki senses the air's temperature and density, a sight only she possesses that gives her an advantage over curses.

Also, Sukuna sensed that Maki was a problem and thanked Uraume for possibly taking her out:

The top four seek to stop the merger and sever Megumi from Sukuna's body, and Maki possesses a sword that severs souls! Sukuna has been worn down until his cursed energy matched Yuta's, who's now number one since Gojo's died. Keep in mind that Gojo was worlds ahead of Yuta, so Sukuna's power has plummeted and he needs time to recover.

Sukuna's inner monologue in 250:

Maki has the Heavenly Restriction, the sword, the sight, and the timing needed to be able to face Sukuna and possibly even defeat him. Gojo, Kashimo, Higuruma, Yuta, and Yuji were all a means to an ends to weaken Sukuna until Maki could come and clean up (I'm exaggerating).

Maki's entire character arc has been about her clashing with Sukuna. Maki, the monstrous human w/o CE vs Sukuna, the monstrous once-sorcerer with the most CE. Their fight will be about both their ideals and powers. Is strength truly isolating? To what extent does the monster cast aside love? Can monstrous strength be used to protect others?

Edit:

Sukuna's domain may be the only one that works on her (and Kenjaku's but he's dead) because they don't have barrier mechanics. As pointed out by SwimmingStreet8981, "Sukuna showed that he cuts absolutely everything in his domain. He turned buildings to dust without even trying."

Either Gege restores Sukuna's domain to turn the battle once more, or the domain battle with Gojo was for the sake of the top 4 not having to worry about Sukuna's domain. I think the latter tbh.

Questions for their battle:

Now that Sukuna's down to two hands and one mouth, and Maki might be the fastest person in meta at this moment, how much deep shit is Sukuna in?

Will the soul splitting blade be the key to stop the merger? How does that even work against Sukuna?

[isfjmel-phleg]

1, 5, 17, and 19, for Amarantha?

1 What was the original thought that led to the creation of this character?

I don't remember when I was struck with the idea of making a sequel to the original Blackberry Bushes story that would feature Elystan's nurse's daughter, but it was a pretty early concept (I was about fourteen then). The original drawing of Amarantha still exists somewhere. The story was more about how she and Elystan have an adventure together after going through the blackberry bush portal to the real world and getting accidentally stuck there, but the basic arc about her relationship with Elystan was present. Not much else to her at that point, though. I did know what her basic temperament was. That was one of the first things I decided.

5 How did you choose their name and why? Was it simply based on vibes or is there any specific meaning behind the name? Are the reasons behind their name different in- and out of universe?

I originally chose her name because the amaranth flower had magical significance in the world of the story, back when it was still a very bad fantasy. It is an actual name, meaning "unfading," though I've never heard it used anywhere else--CORRECTION: I just made the mistake of googling it and found out that it's also the name of a character in one of those awful "A Court of..." type books. I used it first though!

So later when I dropped the amaranth thing, I didn't want to change Amarantha's name because I'd gotten used to it, so I came up with the in-universe excuse of her father the part-time poet not being able to help himself when naming his child.

17 Are there any motifs or symbols associated with the character? How are they represented, in their design, personality or in some other way?

Her concept of The Hedge. The discussion of her favorite color of maroon and Elystan's later being associated with teal as a signal that they are complements. Her interest in portraiture as a means of conveying character, which connects with her belief that she objectively understands who people really are, when in fact she's very subjectively sketching them through the lens of her biases--but her art will improve as she becomes less judgmental and more genuinely insightful. Her pinned-up braids, as a visual for her uptightness and how her early encounter with Elystan has had a lasting effect (he pulled her loose hair then, so she's ensuring that no one can do anything like that to her again).

19 What is your general favourite thing about the character? What is your least favourite?

I like that she's what I would consider a rare type in fiction: a quiet angry girl. Quiet female characters tend to be calm and patient and saintly and diffident in constrast to the outgoing spirited girls who are usually the only ones who get to experience emotions like anger, and while there are a lot of amazing characters that fit this pattern, it's a dichotomy that can be overdone and restrictive. Amarantha is quiet, generally polite, and conscientious; she is also an angry jerk. These are things that can exist at the same time, this is something that I can find relatable, and I enjoy trying to make her a believable person rather than one of a few acceptable archetypes.

Least favorite, though...she's not always easy to write, and if I'm not careful, there's a temptation to reduce her to her relationships and not develop her as a distinctive character in her own right.

[dyemelikeasunset]

I'm curious about the zombie and ghost motifs for Dom and mor! Also the mannequin and ragdoll motifs as well.

So, why did you pick those motifs for them?

Whew, here are some of my personal essays about my symbolism!

spoilers and upsetting themes under the readmore

Ghost & Zombie:

Because they meet after near-death experiences, they have a lot of motifs about the afterlife (I mean their prequel series is titled "It Was You & I & The Afterlife")

Mor represents the corporeal or physical plane, so her undead theme revolves around a zombie, an undead being that still has a body. Zombies also have folklore origins in the Carribean and further back to central Africa, which is Mor's family heritage (Jamaican with possible roots from Congo)

Dom represents the spiritual and immaterial plane, so her undead theme revolves around ghosts, usually severed from their bodies. She's specifically a Diao Si Gui, or Chinese ghost of a person who was hung to death

in you&i, they are tortured by conflicts from their opposite planes. Mor is tortued by spirital and immaterial problems, while Dom is tortured by physical and corporeal problems. They slowly lead the other to a middle ground, where they can protect each other from their opposing traumas

Mannequin & Ragdoll:

This theme is focused around lack of self ownership, something they both struggle with. It has a lot to do with sexuality, race, and personal dissociation

Mor's lack of identity often centers around love, as dolls are meant to be loved and cradled but often tossed aside as they get worn and used. Morgan puts a lot of her self worth into her romantic relationships, and feels very empty and worthless when she's single. A lot of this comes from her abandoning parts of her identity in the pursuit of (and hope for) an ideal love A constant motif for her is how she struggles with her racial identity and her queer identity, represented by her strained, back-and-forth relationship with her mother and her euphoric-then-tumultuous dating history The ragdoll imagery combines her compartmentalized identity (a major overarching theme that runs through most of her other subthemes) with her visual characterization of having stitches everywhere. There is also a mental health metaphor for "unraveling" and her "fabric of reality coming undone" Deep down, Morgan wants to be a princess and a Barbie, but in the end she feels more like a fabric doll that gets used and discarded easily

For Dom, the fashion mannequinn metaphor is pretty obvious, but I centered most of the visualization on vintage mannequins that resemble empty cages. Dom has a visual subtheme of a hollow ribcage, partly to reflect how she doesn't understand love in any form, but it also represents the fact that she lacks passion and love for life. She is largely defined by her job-- which uses and objectifies her but also gives her meaning Unlike Morgan's Ragdoll, which is meant to be held, Dom's Mannequin is only meant to be looked at, touched only by the people posing her for display. This plays into Dom's touch starvation and her not understanding how to fulfill that deep human need without relationships that prioritize sex The mannequin does purposefully combine bits of "porcelain doll" imagery to reflect the way that Dominique's race plays into the specific exotified objectification she suffers in her industry

Ultimately this theme dyad represents the unique connection they find in each other, as women who don't belong to themselves. It represents their desire for some form of love and recognition, something gentler than what they've experienced throughout their lives

[tangledinink]

how did you go about designing gemini mikey venus and jennika's masks? they look so cool!

Oh gosh what a fun question. I'm about to babble a bunch so I'll put it below a cut 'cause it's long, sorry...

The main motivation for giving Mikey a mask in the first place was I wanted him to have some design element that called back to the horns on Draxum's helmet, (kinda like how @evenmoreofadisaster's Two does) to represent how Mikey looks up to him and emphasize the importance of their relationship. I didn't wanna just do the same thing as EMD, though, of course, and that same design element wouldn't work for Mikey the way it does for Two, anyway. So then the question was-- how do I give this guy horns?

I ended up landing on "oh, I can give him a mask!" I referenced a bunch of different japanese oni masks for the design-- it specifically has 'X's' for eyes to reference his canon kneepads. :3c I hadn't planned to include Venus and Jennika when I designed Mikey, and ended up adding them in a bit later, but it always kinda seemed obvious that they should have masks, too...

I wanted Venus's mask to appear a bit calmer and softer, to kind of reflect her personality, and while I considered giving her the classic "mask tail braid," I also wanted to give her a bow (since all the Hamato Kids have one somewhere!) and keep her 'different,' so I ended up deviating slightly and giving her braids coming from the mask's 'mouth,' instead, to represent smoke, steam, or clouds, which is a somewhat common motif I saw when looking at reference materials for her.

For Jennika, I knew I wanted to give her a big ol' bow, and after a bit of experimenting I decided the best way to do this was to put the mask on the back of her head-- which I also found meant I had the chance to add the fun little design element of giving her 'horns' that sort of appear to be her own by poking out over the top of her head. She's a bit of a spit-fire, so she has sort of 'devilish' little horns to represent this. Her mask being on the back of her head instead of the front like her siblings is also sort of a reference to how she feels a bit less connected to their 'mission' than them, or at least, feels the devotion differently than they do. Venus and Mikey's masks, the visual representation of their relationship with Draxum and their 'divine mission,' is right in the forefront, covering half their faces. Though Jennika still wears a mask, her face is bare-- her mask is behind her, rather than being the very first thing you see.

[trthfck]

𝖍𝖔𝖑𝖎𝖊𝖘𝖙 𝖔𝖋 𝖍𝖔𝖑𝖞, 𝖊𝖎𝖐𝖔𝖓-𝖘𝖑𝖆𝖞𝖊𝖗. ⸻ A SERIES OF MODERN UNIVERSES , with VARIANTS. ( revre merva. )

some things to first take into consideration are that most, if not all of these, default into a modern fantasy/science fiction/alternative 'modern' in which there are multiple races of creatures, both humanoid and bestial / 'monstrous' races exist. being a viera is integral to revre's character and her creation, so i don't ever want to change that. (though, there will be some modern verses in the future that mention her as being 'genetically altered' to have those rabbit-esque appearances and viera traits. see below.)

however, what i am willing to go back and forth on is her ability to use black magic. while her connection to nald'thal in particular is important, it is easy to swap out the specific ffxiv element of that god into another god of death / curse / eldritch being. given that revre by nature has some semblance of eldritch motifs with her black magic, i would be happy to remove addressing revre's patron god by name (and is explicitly done in one of the variants below).

please only have interest in this verse if you're okay with maintaining an alternate element of a modern timeline, such as her visual appearance or ancestry.

variants: standard modern, alternate modern (cyberpunk and science fiction to come later)

𝖎. 𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖆𝖗𝖉 𝖒𝖔𝖉𝖊𝖗𝖓. ⸻  they say there's an influential woman who is equal parts affluent and eccentric. they say she lives in a penthouse elsewhere in the city and does dealings with anyone who might find themselves in the need for divine intervention. some call her a modern-day goddess; others will call her by what she is: their beloved saint merva.  the standard deviation into a modern universe places revre into the role of an affluent woman whose money seems to be never-ending and has plenty of tasks for others in need of adventure or occupation to do. damn near an urban legend, revre is an imposing figure who seems to have friends in all kinds of high places and a bottomless pool of followers/employees who will do whatever it takes to please her. the rumors about her change on the daily: that she is a company president, that she is a mob boss, that she is born into old money, that she leads a secret society. no one knows what the truth really is, but it seems that revre enjoys hearing new rumors about herself.

in this universe, revre is best suited to be an employer, handler, provider, sugar mama, etc. while she can't use her black magic like she does in her home media (swapping between fire and ice, using the elements, etc), she does appear to be religious, and there are aspects about her that just seem... wrong. she will have eldritch elements here, including but not limited to the ability to change her appearance to best suit her needs (sometimes even going so far as to grow another set of eyes or split her tongue or take a more monstrous shape) or manipulate shadow to appear and work as tendrils (often doing mundane things, such as reaching for something she can't grab). the cult of nald'thal is represented here by revre's group of employees/devotees who do not accept her disappointment as an option.

𝖎𝖎. 𝖆𝖑𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖒𝖔𝖉𝖊𝖗𝖓. ⸻ there is a run-down church on the outskirts of town that god has long since forgotten. there is a woman who keeps its company, keeps it clean, tends to the effigies and the flame, but the church that exists there is no longer devoted to god.  they call it the church of nald'thal,  who supposedly is a god of dual domain: nald, of the riches and affluence, and thal, of the dead and of graves.  in which revre works and serves as the high priestess of a 'coven or cult' of sorts, devoted to the god nald'thal, who gives his blessing to revre and is considered her 'father'. 

in this universe, revre is best suited to be an advisor, teacher, mentor, or friend. when she is not attending the church or giving her sermons as the high priestess of nald'thal, she runs an occult shop not far from the church, where she ensures that anyone who might need to find her can do so. most citizens would have a bad feeling about her, or tell their younger ones to stay away from her, in the same way that witches of a previous era would have been ostracized or sent away for consorting with 'the devil'. 

[veileranthonypopularmusic]

'My Heart Will Go On': how is the song connected to Mediations and Histories? & New question for my topic research

Today’s post will be devoted to this iconic song from Celine Dion, who is by the way one of my favourite female singers. Even though she is a Canadian singer, she composed several English songs, among which ‘My Heart Will Go On’ is undoubtedly one of the most famous ones. It is a 1997 song recorded by her, which, as everybody know, has been used as the soundtrack to James Cameron’s epic romance and disaster movie, Titanic. I assume that there is no need to summarise it, is there? ‘My Heart Will Go On’ is often said to be Celine Dion’s signature song in that its worldwide sales are estimated to 18 million copies! In addition, it is the second best-selling physical by a woman in the music industry and one of the best-selling physical selling of all time. The song’s music was composed by James Horner and the lyrics were written by Will Jennings. The music video was directed by Bille Woodruft and was released at the end of 1997. In 2017, Celine Dion performed the song to honour the 20th anniversary of Titanic at the Billboard Music Awards.

The song had a huge cultural impact and was said to become imprinted on the movie’s legacy and that every listen is a reminder of the blockbuster and the hype that goes with it. In this sense, the song will forever be linked with the movie. According to The Washington Post, it is the marriage of music and image that contributed to the its incredible success.

Here is a list of all the numerous awards the song got:

As I have said before, the music video was directed by Bille Woodruff, a film director. It shows Celine Dion who is singing at the bow of the ship. What is interesting to know is that the she actually provided one special effect on set and she sung in a high speed version of the signature song.

Originally, it was James Horner who had composed the music for the song and it was portrayed as an instrumental motif, which he used in many scenes during the movie. On the lyricists part, it is said that they wanted to wrote lyrics which would reflect the following : ‘from the point of view of a person of a great age looking back so many years’. However, James Cameron did not want this type of song in the first place but it turns out that Will Jennings wrote the lyrics anyway. In the same way, Celine Dion, when she heard out the song for the first time, she did not want to record it, believing that she was pushing her luck by singing another film theme song. In fact, she sang for ‘Beauty and the Beast’ and ‘Because You Loved Me’. But James Cameron felt the need to include a theme song to promote his fim. Celine Dion recorded the song for her album release when the movie was released with its considerable success. It definitely became a hit song.

According to me this song have close links with Mediations and Histories. Let's see how:

On the one hand, I believe the song is connected to Mediations in the sense that it perfectly feats with the movie and thus it sets a world around the music. I am sure that whenever a person ears the song, he or she instantly visualizes plenty of images : Rose and Jack, the ship, and many other things Titanic represent. Besides, I think the movie contains many symbolic images which we can remember so easily. The film has really made it possible to illustrate the sounds conveyed by the song.

On the other hand, I think that the song can also be linked with Histories. Indeed, since the movie is based on the real sinking of Titanic in April 1912, the song, even though it is not at all its main theme, can in some ways relate to its historical impact, given that this tragic accident had cost the lives of so many people. I think we can agree on the fact that if we listen to the song, it is somehow remeniscent of the real sinking of the Titanic, even though the song is obviously made to illustrate the movie above all.

Alright, I'll finish here.

Did you see the film? Did you like it? What about the song?  Do you think it can be representative of Mediations and Histories?

_________

SOURCES:

Concerning my research project :

I decided to simplify my question, which was a bit ambitious, so instead of talking about Maryline Monroe as an American figure of culture imperalism, I would rather ask the following:

How did Maryline Monroe succeed in providing an image of sex-symbol into the music industry as part of an American centered culture?

Hopefully, this question will be more manageable to approach my topic on M.M

[sepublic]

Meta Marcy Wu

           Marcy really does have that energy of like. Someone who doesn’t have a whole lot of ‘opinions’ on bigger matters (such as the conflict between Toads and Newts, Sasha and Anne, Maddie and her sisters, etc.) so she just sort of. Awkwardly waits and sits off to the side, kind of biding her moment for when it’s finally over. Letting others take charge so long as she gets her own little space to function in. She’s not against or for anyone in particular, she just needs people to decide for themselves who she should follow, Marcy prefers to be a follower and ONLY that- Her debut has her asserting her own control for herself, but she doesn’t seem to care much else about others, I’m afraid.

           Contrast that with Anne, who needs her own control- BUT she also has the Heart, so she cares about others, she’s proactive and has agency despite initially being told to be reactive and not stand up for herself. Even if she can’t stand up for herself, she will stand up for others… And I think she was lowkey influenced by Sasha’s obsessive desire to protect the girls, and that played into Anne being a little bit toxic, but ultimately learning and having that inner fire to take a stance on things based on moral reasons, whereas Sasha seems more concerned for power than the actual social plight of the Toads- So even if Anne isn’t with the rebellion, it’s ultimately something she WOULD fully dedicate herself towards, like when we saw her stand up for the Frogs against Bog and the other Toads.

           And like, I have to wonder if Marcy’s more hands-off, simple follower approach is lowkey what contributed to Sasha’s belief in controlling others, because it validated that- But at the same time, we talk about how Sasha might care more for Anne than Marcy, and we see how Sasha is frustrated by Toadie, who is but an echo chamber for her. So maybe while Marcy is convenient to her, she’s just a bit too passive and thus not as ‘fun’ as a friend as Anne, who is also a concern because she has genuine motive to question Sasha not just on the basis of their friendship, but people OUTSIDE of it, which Marcy doesn’t.

           Anne being fiercely loyal and protective and sticking up for others, it also could’ve fed back into Sasha’s own tendencies as well. And of course these more proactive, in-your-face girls, always on the frontlines, are going to clash, while Marcy the forgotten follower, the wall-flower, the one in the background focused on more ‘nerdy’ things that are less glamorous, like logistics and whatnot… SHE’s the lynchpin that actually tips the scales- Because she’s the third girl who ‘sides’ with Anne between the initial conflict from Season 1. She’s the one with Andrias, flipping things up when Anne and Sasha are going to fight, contributing to that prophesized endgame.

           Marcy is the one, ironically, with the power –albeit as an extension of Andrias really- and so she’s the antagonist who’s clashing with Sasha, who is also power-hungry, but really beginning to learn as well. Marcy is caught up in her own little fantasy land and world, both literally and figuratively, happily enjoying and watching as a witness and bystander, almost detached in a sense to really participate and appreciate it as a very real thing… And being separate and an ‘audience’ member, Marcy is of course forgotten by Sasha and Anne, who play the part of characters; Fitting, because in that one flashback, they were Captain Hook and Peter Pan, while Marcy worked back-stage, literally pulling the strings (well, rope) for Anne!

           It’s Marcy who’s obsessed and fascinated with the meta of fandom and fiction, so of course she’s the one who steps back and observes it like media, takes the time to comment on it as if it were all tropes, watching and enjoying while for Sasha and Anne they participate directly without that kind of detached meta awareness, the kind someone like Andrias would have, because for THEM it’s real, there are stakes, power for Sasha and people for Anne! And Marcy is the backstage audience, fourth-wall crewmember, unnoticed by all who forget and ignore her, and she’s used to it. Maybe Marcy even enjoys and prefers it that way, and/or learned to- And it’s too late to pay attention, to see themselves as characters in that wider play and story and plot, unlike Andrias who notices and takes advantage… And may have been writing since who knows HOW early?

           If I could get into meta, Marcy playing that quiet, unnoticed support role, doing whatever’s convenient- It reminds me of how the visual basis for your typical Ninja in black garb… It came from plays where performers in black garb would maneuver props, and the audience was supposed to intentionally ignore them, see them as separate from the actual story; But every now and then, one play might have a ‘twist’ where that background actor actually IS a character, and assassinates someone to reveal themselves as the hidden Ninja!

          So maybe Marcy is like that… The background crewmember, not calling attention to herself in the acting role- In plain sight but we figure we’re meant to ignore, and so we’re utterly blindsided when she DOES strike! It’s Marcy who appreciates the little technical know-how and details, valuing the role that Frogs and agriculture play, considering Newtopian infrastructure, working back-stage in a Peter Pan play… Appreciating the writing conventions and tropes of her favorite games and fantasies, and so that in a way enables her to ‘game’ the system in a sense, play into it with her own hands, or even set up that game and story in the first place, because she knows how to make one!

          She is the drummer while Anne and Sasha play guitar and sing, not as glamorous or recognized amongst a crowd, but just as vital as the rest… She’s a very META kind of person, befitting her choice of METAmorphosis as part of her drummer costume! You don’t pay mind to a caterpillar, but then little do you know, it becomes an even more unnoticeable cocoon… Only to sprout into a brilliant butterfly! But while the BLUE butterfly is associated with Anne and her connections back home through Pearl Paddock, who is representative of familial bond, remembering who you are… Marcy is disconnected, she’s a GREEN butterfly, green like the lilypads of Amphibia, and she wants to stay there!

          And the best part, I think? I don’t think Marcy herself is even fully aware of what she’s doing… I doubt she sees herself as some clever manipulator. She’s just doing what she can, having her fun plans and machinations like in New Wartwood, but she’s not ACTUALLY approaching this as some devious mastermind- She’s literally just a kid! She gets caught up in her own things, because she is an autistic mood, and I get that! I resonate with that! And so it’s so easy for Marcy to be blindsided by HERSELF, by her own flaws and borderline antagonistic role in the story, to realize what she’s doing is kind of messed up and trivializing- Because we know that she WANTS to care, but it’s so easy and convenient for her to forget and play into the fantasy… Especially with someone like Sasha, and especially Andrias, to enable her, to provide that safety and support net that MARCY doesn’t complain about or take for granted, unlike that ‘ungrateful’ Anne, as Sasha might’ve one said!

           And if Marcy isn’t really self-aware of her own issues or even the full messed-up scope of her actions, to take a look back and critically examine herself the way she might a character or even her own friends; Then that can also make her a victim to her own antics, just as Sasha kept burying herself into a deeper hole. And it’s hard to do the right thing, if you don’t even realize you’re messing up in the first place- Recognizing your fault is kind of one of THE foundations of actual reform, growth, and redemption. I think Marcy needs guidance, and she needs to show more initiative and take a stance not just for herself, but regarding others as well… And that can lead to her choosing between Anne and Andrias.

           Andrias, whose name is like Anne’s but more fantastical, who is blue like Anne’s motif… And who looks after her like a good friend, makes things easier and promises they will be! And he’s invested into the fantasy, he doesn’t want to go home and complicate things, get into fights with Sasha, because it’s the person in charge who decides how it is, right? Which is why True Colors continues to concern me… Amidst, you know, the many OTHER issues as well.

[ofmermaidstories]

i’ve been thinking about one of my favourite videos, lately, and i want to share it.

Beyond Ghibli is a video essayist who focuses on Japanese animation/entertainment. His most popular video is his first — a look into anime directors beyond Hayao Miyazaki, followed up by his videos on Akira, and its creator, Katsuhiro Otomo; and then how Studio Ghibli’s aesthetic and films have inspired Breath of the Wild. All of his videos are beautiful — and I mean that, beautiful, lovingly complied and narrated — but my favourite of his, however, happens to be his essay on Makoto Shinkai — and Shinkai’s 2016 runaway hit, Your Name.

There’s something very calming, about Joe’s voice. He’s gentle; carefully enunciated. And the things he chooses to focus on, in his essays, always underscore just how... powerful media can be. With his essay Shinkai - Not Separation, But Connection, he does it to incredible effect. Makoto Shinkai undeniably creates some visually stunning films — and Joe explores that, as well as Shinkai’s weaknesses in his storytelling. And yet it’s not a criticism — it’s just an observation, one that makes Shinkai’s work perhaps even more lovely, for being able to recognise it. There’s one particular beat, in the video, that encapsulates everything I love about Joe’s essays — it’s the lead up to him introducing Your Name, a passage where he summarises the core theme that reappears, again and again, in Shinkai’s works. I couldn’t tell you why it strikes me. On the surface level, I’d say it was the music it’s set to; Joe always carefully picks the score, for his videos, borrowing from whatever piece he’s talking about, and in this particular passage he uses a piece from Kashiwa Daisuke’s score for Shinkai’s 2013 The Garden of Words — The Afternoon of Rainy Day. It’s a beautiful piece, just by itself, divorced of any context; it sounds so much like the melancholy and the ache of being caught in a gentle rain, with no expectations of the day in front of you. Music is manipulative, and I have no doubt that using this piece has underlined the beauty of Joe’s words — but it’s what he says, the words themselves, that always make me pause. I think it’s because the whole passage represents what anyone who creates wants out of this world — to be seen. To have you, have what you create, be seen and be recognised as whole; flaws and all, and to still have it matter, even if it’s just to one person.

That hook, whether it be body-swapping teenagers, the Land of the Dead or girls who can control the weather, are all in service of a theme Shinkai has woven through every movie he has made: separation.

Whether by space, by illness, by d i s t a n c e, by age, or even by death — this beautiful, but heart-breaking motif is omnipresent in his work.

It would all be a little dour, perhaps, if Shinkai didn’t conveniently provide the antidote as well: because for all the melancholia of what separates us, these films are ultimately about what connects us.

It’s so simple. It is simple and it is loving and it’s the kind of mirror that I think anyone would be overwhelmed to have held up to them; to be reflected in. It does Makoto Shinkai’s career, and his art, justice. And he does it for every piece and creator he examines, in his essays; my next favourite of his is his two-parter on Mari Okada and her complicated relationship with her mother, and consequently, motherhood, in her work — specifically, Maquia: When The Promised Flower Blooms. But the one I’ve rewatched the most, after his Shinkai essay, is I Want to Eat Your Pancreas - The Fault in Her Guts, which is a look at the story over its varying adaptions, and what each one brings (and loses). It convinced me to watch the anime movie (which I did, and then immediately bawled through) which in turn convinced me to buy the manga. The soundtrack for it is one of my favourites — I had it as background noise whenever I was working on (or more accurately, daydreaming about) surrender. It’s hopeful, like the story itself — like Joe’s essay for it.

If you have some time to fill, or you just want some calming background noise, then — I cannot recommend his channel enough. Even if it’s just for his voice.

[sneakydraws]

Well, here it is - a lengthy explanation of each card in my mdzs major arcana deck and what I meant to convey/what i would have changed in retrospect/what alternatives i considered! It’s a bit messy and my typing style is lazy but hopefully it will be an interesting read to some of you :)

And so you don’t say I didn’t warn you - jiang cheng’s section (11 justice) is absurdly long lmao

0 the fool  I elaborated on this in the post itself but yeah basically jin ling is kind of representative of all the damage and trauma caused by the past, and there’s a kind of danger there of him falling victim to the same vices as the older characters and repeating the same mistakes and perpetuating the cycle of war and misery (the cycle that we already see with how the jin sect became the new wen sect, and later with how jgy became the new wwx) and he has a lot of room to grow! He grows so much over the course of the novel, comes to realise the complexities of the past and gets a harsh life lesson in how nothing is as black and white as it seems. But ill save talking about his progress for the end, for now whats important is that he has room to grow and also a dog. I don’t really have a justification for the sun, i mostly just thought it looked sick? It made its way to the next card as well, where it makes a bit more sense, but then i realised it was a dumb motif to include 1 the magician I still very much like wwx for the role, and that illustration would have probably had him raising a corpse on his left and pointing threateningly to the sun on his right. I considered including the table as well, with some mdzs relevant items replacing the card suits. Anyway, like i said wwx got a few cards to himself already so i went with the alternative wq design, since i think she fits the card as well. Both she and wwx are highly skilled people, extremely driven once they set their mind to something. The card to me symbolises the creative mind as well as a general drive for action, which fits them both - wwx was famously a prolific inventor, and wq came up with a previously unheard of surgery, after all. This card strays pretty far from the rider-waite deck design, largely because i was still figuring out how i wanted to approach this series, but you can still see the influence. 2 the high priestess I was actually going to skip this card at first because I couldn’t think of a fitting character, but once i considered a qings character post death, it all fit pretty well. She was already a highly intuitive person in life, and in sharing her memories with wwx she is, in a way, relaying a kind of secret knowledge. Anyway she’s one of my fav characters so im glad i got a chance to include her. The coffins could be interpreted to be xxc and sl or xxc and xy 3 the empress Theres other mother figures in mdzs who got to be mothers for a longer time, but jyl definitely embodies the positive aspects of this card the best. She’s nurturing, kind, emotionally supportive, she already mothered wwx and jc quite a bit when she was young. Plus i liked that the rw card had both water and flowers, making an easy lotus connection. In retrospect the stars look kind of out of place and i should have replaced them with something more relevant... Also, i should have had her hold a lotus seed pod instead of a flower, haha 4 the emperor Like i said I considered jc for the role but hoching bullied me into admitting that nmj was better… they’re both more of an inverted emperor than an upright one but then again theres hardly any character in mdzs who would fit upright emperor so. Jgs was also considered but he’s even uglier than nmj so i couldn’t bear to draw him 5 the hierophant It was pointed out to me that lqr would have fit this card better and the truth if that statement haunts me to this day. Unfortunately I have no space in my brain for lqr so lxc got the role instead. My main reason was his role during the wen destruction of gusu lan, when he ran away with the contents of the library - this is why there’s bookshelves behind him. The keys, take, from the rider-waite deck, are meant to represent the gusu pendants that allow you to enter 6 the lovers Im sure many people would have chosen wangxian here but I uhh don’t really care abt wangxian personally? And also their love story is so convoluted that jyl and jzx seem idyllic by comparison lol. Also i didnt really have an idea for who to put in the angel’s place for wangxian… mme jin certainly did not get these two together in the end but undeniably she and mme yu did initially give them a chance to fall for each other so. Thats something i guess. Anyway the trees became their sects’ flowers and the mountain became the burial grounds - an omen of their tragic fate, basically 7 the chariot There might have been other characters who fit this card better but i couldn’t really think of another card for lwj and i thought it would be weird to not include him… anyway i don’t really care for current timeline lwj BUT i do like that he was clearly influenced by wwx to walk his own path in life based on his moral convictions rather than follow his sect’s rules blindly. The chariot is to me a card of self control, self determination and focused action, so it seemed fitting. The composition felt kind of empty without the actual chariot so i padded it out with the guqin, the cloud recess in the bg (it doesn’t look great but i tried to replicate the drama design….) and the bunnies which conveniently fit the colour scheme of the sphinxes in the rider-waite design 8 strength Like i said before, my interpretation of this card is more… morally ambiguous than the quote unquote official meaning, so i thought about manipulative or duplicitous characters more than kind characters whose strength is expressed through gentleness (though i did consider jyl briefly for the latter interpretation). As such, i considered both jgy and nhs, but ended up going with jgy largely because i couldn’t pass up the opportunity to put the nie sect’s beast as the lion. 9 the hermit My thoughts immediately went to bssr lol. It may be an overly literal interpretation but whatever, i like it just fine. And i like that i managed to echo the rider-waite silhouette in the mountain and the tree (and even in bssr herself) 10 wheel of fortune God i love the parallels between these 2… this card to me is about how you cant trust your current situation, good or bad, to last forever, and these 2 embody that perfectly imo. Wwx went from son of a well off servant and a powerful cultivator, to street rat orphan, to adopted son of sect leader jiang, to double orphan, to MIA, to terrifying but admired warrior, to terrifying and despised traitor, to dead, to, at the very end, suddenly respected and trusted again. The dishonesty and cheapness of whatever the public’s current opinion of him is is portrayed beautifully as far as im concerned. And jgy of course claws his way up to power only to instantaneously become public enemy number one, to the point that he’s probably blamed for stuff there’s no reason to believe he had a hand in. Wei wuxian’s silent astonishment at how quickly the cultivation world turns against jgy and towards him again is a delicious moment of thematic resonance.  11 justice I settled on this card for jc after he got booted from the emperor seat but i do think it fits, in a somewhat convoluted way. I turned both the sword and the scales into visual representations of the golden core transfer (can you tell im obsessed with it). According to biddy tarot, the justice card is partly about searching for the truth, and the scene where jc finds out about the transfer is of course a big deal. I was also very influenced by the reversed meaning again - which is about being reluctant or unwilling to face or accept the consequences of your actions. I feel on an intuitive level that this fits jc but I’m not sure how well i can explain it - it’s something about how he’s a little too comfortable scapegoating wwx for things that were also, if much less so, influenced by his actions, and also something about the way he keeps wwx at an arm’s length emotionally but still leans on him and accepts his support when he really needs it, and somewhat hypocritically expects wwx to put the needs of him and the jiang sect before the needs of others. And also something about the core exchange is the consequence and proof of wwx’s deep - terrifyingly deep, even - love and care for him, which is something jc doesn’t seem to let himself acknowledge. Maybe even something about how you could argue that the way all of the jiangs acted around wwx - jfm’s favouritism that left him with the feeling of a debt he needs to repay, mme yus insistence that he be a servant more than a brother to jc, prepared to give his life for jc, and jc’s own unwillingness - or inability, he was a child after all - to clearly acknowledge wwx as an equal to himself, enabling wwx’s self sacrificial and protective tendencies - that all of this was what caused wwx’s complete and unquestioning willingness to do whatever it took to protect jc, and therefore paved the way to the golden core transfer. And i don’t mean this to be scapegoating jc - especially considering how young he was when this all went down, it wouldn’t be fair to expect this level of emotional perceptiveness, awareness and maturity of him - but i think adult jc has to grapple with the fact that the chain of cause and effect was not as simple as wwx fucking everyone’s lives up to be a martyr, and that both jc and his parents had a role in that story as well. I don’t even necessarily think this is something that jc only realised in the current timeline - i think it’s something he felt on some level this whole time, and it probably led to a lot of feelings of guilt - but the suibian reveal definitely puts it in sharp focus, and i think he’s now better equipped to handle this introspection than he was as a recently orphaned, traumatised teenager, lol. ANYWAY the window with the fabric is both a nod to the rider-waite design and a reference to the destruction of lanling - i actually did some basic ass research for this, and it seems that in ancient china fabric would indeed be hanged in a window if the normally used paper was damaged. The design of the window, as well as the very idea to use it to imply the reconstruction of lanling, was taken from this great piece of jc angst by my pal moroll1! Oh yeah also the covered window kind of works as a denial of forgiveness for jc because it’s like a halo but covered up... Also I completely forgot to put a blindfold over his eyes which would be perfectttt because blind justice and the core exchange......... ok moving on 12 the hanged man I always have issues with this card because i cant find a satisfactory summary of what it’s really about. Best i can tell it symbolises a need to hit pause, surrender or let go of something… ive also seen it tied to sacrifice? So mo xuanyu doesn’t fit perfectly, but sacrifice is definitely there in a surface level reading kind of way, and the idea that you have to surrender or let go in order to achieve your goal does fit the whole deal of getting revenge but giving up your life in exchange and not being there to see it 13 death This is probably one of my favourite cards, definitely not because I have huge issues with change or anything…. I see this card as signalling the necessity of change or putting an end to something / leaving something in the past in order to start anew? At first i considered putting past wwx, mxy and current wwx here as a kind of transformation and one cycle flowing into the next... But firstly, I’d already used mxy in the very previous card, so putting him in again would feel like overkill, and secondly, the longer I thought about it the less convinced I was that this would even fit with the card’s meaning? Because coming back from the dead doesn’t like... trigger an internal transformation within wwx or anything? Anyway, fun fact: the design I ended up going with was actually originally intended for judgement! I thought I was being very clever with the whole “figure plays an instrument and the dead rise” parallel, but apparently I’d just completely forgotten that the judgement card had a completely different composition... Truly I was boo boo the fool... But yeah anyway at the end of the day I figured the design would kind of work for death as well, with Wen Ning and the theme of transformation, (since in his case coming back as a fierce corpse does actually mark a certain transformation in behaviour) and Wei Wuxian’s protection of the Wen people essentially signifying an attempt to break the cycle of oppression if that makes any sense? Like, wwx is trying to revolutionise the way the world works a bit, if you catch my drift 14 temperance  The centrist card! Again this is probably going off track from the “official” interpretation, but to me this card has a certain “don’t commit fully; do everything in moderation; don’t take either side” flavour to it that i personally find infuriating irl and that i very much assign to lxc. It’s entirely possible that I’m misinterpreting his character because i didn’t really pay him (and the 3zun in general) much mind while reading, but hell, I’m allowed to pick favourites and choose who i want to interpret deeply vs shallowly. Again, i wish id chosen lqr for hierophant because its so annoying for a character i don’t care about to get two cards…. But oh well 15 the devil My alternative idea for this was jgy as the devil and lxc plus nmj as the figures, but since all three had been featured already (multiple times, even!) i figured I’d go with xy instead, especially since he’s among my faves lol. I think the devil signifies something along the lines of unhealthy attachment, obsession or addiction, which isn’t 100% accurate in the case of xxc and a-qing, but if i stretch it a bit to cover toxic relationships in general, and especially manipulation or negative influence, i don’t think it’s half bad. My main struggle here was to choose who amongst the xxc/sl/aq trio to choose for the human figures. 16 the tower Arguably jin zixuans death and the following massacre of nightless city were the final and most direct reason for the siege of burial mounds, and the tiger seal is good shorthand for wwx’s loss of control over his powers, which led to the deaths of jzx and jyl. When reimagining major arcana i like to feature some kind of building in this card (spoilers for a possible future project but in my rose of versailles major arcana set the tower is bastille) and even if it’s not a tower, the image of wwx looming over the gathered crowd from atop a rooftop is so good i couldn’t resist 17 the star Struggled with this one - considered both jin ling and lsz for it, as symbolising a hope for the future, but that was kind of covered by the world so it wouldn’t make sense to include here as well... As usual when I struggle with interpreting a card (as opposed to understanding it but struggling with matching a character to it, like with death or moon) I went to biddy tarot and read all the details about its meaning. What i got was that this card signifies an incoming period of introspection and inner peace following a time of turmoil, as well as a general moving on into a new, better phase of one’s life or finding new meaning and purpose. The figure also suggests someone vulnerable, but possessing a keen sense of intuition as well as a good degree of practicality and common sense. Given all those, I settled for mianmian because IM LOVE HER..... I also kind of see her as a prelude to the “just one person is enough” theme present in tgcf!! And i think her decision to abandon her sect because she saw the toxicity and corruption in it is a very inspiring action - even if it didn’t make a large visible impact, i think the appearance of her and her idyllic family at the very end of the novel - paralleling and mirroring wangxian - implies that at the end of the day, it was a meaningful one 18 the moon Another card i ALWAYS fuxking struggle with - this time less because i can’t grasp its meaning and more because I can never find a character that fits it well. I usually get fixated on the “dreams and subconscious” part, but if i lean more on the “disguise, deceit, anxiety and fear” part, i eventually figured the whole yi city arc wouldn’t be a bad fit. I say the entire arc because it really does encompass all those themes if you include both the past and the present - xue yang’s disguise, his tricks with the villagers, a-qing’s lies and even xxc’s reluctance to talk about his past as well as xue yang pretending to be xxc all fit the disguise and deceit angle, and the general mystery and creepiness of the current timeline yi city work well with the anxiety and fear - the mist, the slow uncovering of the past, even a-qing being revealed to be an ally after scaring the shit out of the protags. I definitely struggled with including all the elements and characters, and even moreso with making them vaguely fit the rider-waite composition, but i think it ended up okay ish. OH and i completely forgot to draw mist swirling around them :( 19 the sun I was considering mianmian’s family for this one, but since I used her for star, I ended up with wwx and his parents instead. Once again I’m reinterpreting the card a bit - normally I think it symbolises incoming times of pure happiness and abundance, as well as a connection with the inner child, but I gave it more of a nostalgic or sentimental twist - wwx looking back at the brief glimpse of his happy childhood. 20 judgement another card that i struggle to interpret a bit... Here i actually used the tgcf tarot zine as a reference! In it judgement is summarised as “rebirth, following duty, absolution” SO i figured that nhs, mxy and wwx all together would fit pretty neatly... wwx achieving (public) absolution through clearing his own name after being reborn, and nhs sort of calling on wwx to expose jgy’s crimes... It’s a bit messy but not bad I think! 21 the world This ties very closely to my read on mdzs as a story - which is that it’s, at the end of the day, largely about cycles, and about how hard it is to break them, but how we gotta keep trying and have hope anyway. Or maybe more precisely, that the people directly involved with and influenced by the trauma of the past might not be able to get over said trauma and that the hope for healing from it will be shouldered by the new generation. Or something like that… Basically what i mean is that jc and wwx and lwj and lxc and nhs and jgy and all these people who were in the thick of the sunshot campaign and the siege are so profoundly affected by it that it genuinely feels by the end of the story like there is little hope for them to ever truly overcome that trauma and build a better future without repeating the same old mistakes - but there is a glimmer of hope in the new generation, specifically in jl and lsz. And it’s a bit paradoxical, because they have also been directly impacted by the past tragedies - lsz having his entire clan wiped out after wwx failed to protect them, jl losing both his parents to wwx’s mistakes - but despite that loss, and despite coming from arguably the two opposing sides of the past conflicts, they are both, in the end, capable of moving past that tragedy, of recognising the complicated nature of those conflicts (jl’s moment of clarity at the end is both heartbreaking and hopeful) and forging friendships between clans in the process. I honestly think that the extra where jl is struggling to assert his authority as sect leader, to treat his subjects well and to cooperate with other sects in a truly amicable way is the single hopeful ending note for the larger themes of the novel - it allows us to imagine that maybe these kids can learn from the mistakes of their elders rather than getting sucked in by resentment at those mistakes, and actually build a brighter future for the cultivation world. And sidenote, this is also why i have a soft spot for jin ling and lan sizhui as a ship... speaking of which their poses were directly referenced from the lovers card ehehe

Looking back, I’d like to add some symbol of jin ling’s trauma so that it mirrors baby wen yuan in the tree stump... maybe his father’s sword? 

[plotbnuy]

KarpReviews - Neon Genesis Evangelion (1995) and End of Evangelion

It took me a good while to really get into anime. Well, maybe that’s technically not true, as I grew up with the Pokemon and Yu-gi-oh anime series. That’s really where my exposure to the medium stopped for a long time, though. There was scattered influence, such as an ephemeral viewing of Spirited Away on Cartoon Network, and access to one of the Naruto fighting games. Ultimately, though, I hardly knew what anime was until high school. It was around this time that I would occasionally stay up late to watch Toonami on Saturdays. Toonami provided me with several of my first and favorite anime series, including Cowboy Bebop, Deadman Wonderland, and Soul Eater. One night, however, I found myself treated to something completely bizarre. 

I can’t say for sure exactly what I had watched, though my current knowledge suggests it was one of the Evangelion recap movies. These are abridged versions of the series that tell the story in a more condensed format, though it’s possible I just caught a few episodes of the regular series. The show itself was overwhelmingly confusing and bizarre, with concepts my teenage mind struggled to grasp, and characters that seemed strange and depressing. It certainly didn’t help that I was watching this show in the dead of night while sleep repeatedly attempted to pull me down. I was mesmerized regardless, and the images I saw never left my mind. 

It wasn’t until now that I decided to finally watch the series in its entirety. I was excited to figure out exactly what I’d seen, why the robots in the show looked the way they did, why the “monsters” had such abstract and strange designs. Most importantly, I wanted to experience one of the major pieces of Japanese animation that had influenced so much of popular media. Thankfully, Neon Genesis Evangelion did not disappoint. 

To briefly summarize for those who still haven’t seen the show, the main premise is that, for one reason or another, Earth has become assaulted by powerful beings known as Angels - strange monsters that threaten humanity with their otherworldly power. An organization called NERV, led by Commander Gendo Ikari, plans to protect humanity and destroy the Angels with mysterious and strange humanoid mecha named “EVAs.” They can only be piloted by particular children, one of whom is the main character and Gendo’s son, Shinji. The Angels themselves, as well as their lore, hearken to Christianity, though in the same way that American media loosely uses Greek mythology. While the premise of the show seems to match that of other mecha, such as Gundam or Macross Saga, Evangelion is more about it’s heavy, layered theming as opposed to mecha and kaiju battles. Evangelion’s storytelling is rich and layered, yet I never found it to be overwhelming or poorly paced. Even though it’s dark tone is prevalent throughout, the battles between EVAs and Angels are still exciting and enjoyable on their own, each encounter building the stakes higher and higher, until it almost feels that everything will suddenly explode. Almost. 

Visually, I think Evangelion holds up phenomenally. The animation style is instantly recognizable while still carrying the same charm that many 90′s anime have. Characters are expressive and animated when they need to be, and backdrops are detailed and colorful. I was blown away especially during the show’s numerous fight scenes. Unlike the bulky mechs featured in most media at the time, the EVAs are nimble and powerful, often performing acrobatic feats or creating stunning displays of destruction. I was absolutely captivated by the designs of the EVA’s and Angels, just like I was in high school. The EVA’s are both incredible and sinister, immediately intriguing just from their design alone. Just looking at one makes you want to know more about them. The character designs are simple but still memorable, which matches their personalities well. What I love most about the visuals of this show, however, isn’t the fluid action or expressive characters, but the implementation of long shots and surreal visuals. Several times throughout the series, the show will linger on a single frame for an extended period of time. There’s no dialogue in these segments, just ambient noise or background music. These moments are some of the most engrossing, trapping the viewer in a single uncomfortable moment, such as the gruesome aftermath of an Angel attack, or a long elevator ride following an argument between Asuka and Rei.

Speaking of, the characters in this show are truly fascinating. Nearly every character is layered and interesting, and each one has their own ways in which they deal with the pressure and terrors of the world around them. I was surprised with how much I ended up liking Shinji (during the main series that is, but we’ll get to that) whose awkward and conflicted personality can be easily polarizing to viewers. I thought Asuka was a nice foil for Shinji, and an entertaining character on her own. She is a bit rough around the edges, and her loud and often self-centered personality can be grating at times, but ultimately her presence is a positive one, and I feel she inadvertently pulls other characters out of their shells. Rei, the third part of our pilot trio, is quiet and mysterious, and she adds to a lot of the show’s intrigue. My favorite character is easily Misato. On top of keeping the younger character’s intense personalities in check, her own story is one that the show graciously gives a lot of attention to. Watching her start to work through her demons was thoroughly compelling to me, and I felt that even through her faults she always tries to be mindful of the people around her. Ryoji was another character that I was a bit worried about after his introduction, but thankfully he had much more going for him than his flirty, aloof attitude. The one person that I never got totally sold on, though, is Gendo Ikari. While he’s certainly integral to the plot, his character was too nuanced for my liking, and it dampened his impact on the story. He’s also one of the characters who I can confidently say isn’t a good person, making his presence even more distasteful. Important for sure, but generally unpleasant. 

Perhaps the most memorable piece of this show is it’s music. Truly, every single track within this anime screams “iconic.” The catchy drumming of “Decisive Battle” constantly plays within my head, a track that helped every Angel encounter feel like an elaborate chess game. “Angel Attack” has a memorable, intense melody that felt appropriate for the show’s surreal and powerful monsters. Of course, nothing needs to be said about one of the most iconic anime openings ever, “Cruel Angel’s Thesis.” By far my favorite, though, has to go to “Komm, süsser Tod.” Playing during the finale of End of Evangelion, this hauntingly beautiful song fits the show perfectly, from it’s use of choir-like vocals to the chaotic mess of strings towards the end. Every song in the show’s OST is wonderful, and I often listen to various tracks while I’m working. Even if you don’t want to watch the show, I strongly urge you to check out the soundtrack anyway. 

Deep within these varied, elaborate pieces, behind the catchy music and incredible action set pieces, Neon Genesis Evangelion is a show about depression. Each character struggles with this in a different way: Shinji keeps his distance from those around him, despite needing more than anything to connect to another human being. Asuka searches for validation from the people around her, becoming angry when anyone takes attention away from her, afraid that she’ll be ignored or forgotten. Rei struggles in general to feel like a real person, to become more than her birthright and her purpose. Misato tries to drown herself in her work and in alcohol, keeping herself in denial while she tries to distance herself from her past. In some ways, the EVAs represent the responsibilities of everyday life, highlighted by Shinji’s struggle to fully commit to his obligation of protecting mankind. The characters in this show are broken, messy husks, and for almost the entire show these struggles seem impossible to overcome. These themes and motifs become especially true starting with episode 16, where the show begins to slow down and focus on its characters as the final Angel threat is thwarted. Ultimately, however, the message of the original series is a hopeful one, sending the viewer off with the message that only when you’re able to help yourself can you finally start to truly connect with and help others. It’s a poignant message and one that I think the show earns by weaving it’s theme of depression throughout the entire show, not just focusing on it near the end. 

The end, however, is where Evangelion becomes a truly fascinating piece of media. Part of what makes this true is that, actually, Neon Genesis Evangelion has two endings: the final two episodes of the show, and the movie appropriately titled End of Evangelion. The series has separate endings for a couple of reasons, actually. While I won’t explain it in depth here, the summarized version is that the latter episodes of Evangelion, starting with episode 16, are subjected to a bit of a paradigm shift following production issues and budget cuts. These later episodes are where the various characters’ faults take the forefront of the narrative, and the action scenes become scarce. The final two episodes take on an especially bizarre nature, analyzing the characters within the context of the show, using abstract visualization and disjointed dialogue to do so. Personally, I’ve grown to appreciate this ending. As I mentioned before, while the focus does change towards the end, I still believe the show was always more about the heavy themes than it was about the robot fights. Many, however, do not share my opinion. When the finale originally aired, many viewers were incredibly unhappy. Unreasonably so, as thousands sent angry letters and death threats to the studio, griefing the creator for his vision. They called for a different ending, one with a more satisfying conclusion, with more action and a clearer sendoff for Shinji and the other characters. 

Needless to say, creator Hideaki Anno obliged them. 

Releasing in 1997, End of Evangelion is perhaps the most spiteful piece of artistry ever conceived. While the original series ended with a message of hope, this film turns the series on its head and creates a narrative that simply reeks of despair. Junko Enoshima  could only dream of creating something so explicitly hopeless. While Shinji takes his first steps towards healing in the original ending, this film features a Shinji who has completely and utterly given up. He’s succumbed to his base desires, numb to the world around him in a way that’s turned him into a monster. His thoughts and actions are violent and abusive, he becomes completely deaf to the needs of those around him, and in a few short minutes of this film, he becomes almost completely irredeemable. He knows he’s become a despicable shell of a human being, but he almost seems to revel in that fact. This version of Shinji is utterly useless, and his actions - or rather inaction - causes the complete destruction of everyone he loves. This film is depressing, it’s uncomfortable, and it’s absolutely unconscionable...

And I loved it. 

In context, it’s hard not to imagine that End of Evangelion is a deliberate slap in the face to the fans who so ruthlessly tore apart the original ending of the show. It completely reverses the progress that was made in the original series, opting to create an ending that is more intense and action-packed, but at the price of turning Shinji, the audience surrogate, into a complete bastard. Watching the film for the first time is almost infuriating, especially as Shinji repeatedly destroys everything in his wake through his own self-loathing. Yet, after letting the film sit in my mind for a while, I found it to be a truly unique piece of art. It’s hard to stomach, and I don’t think I can recommend it, especially on its own, but End of Evangelion is a truly fascinating film. 

As a whole, I’m extremely happy I decided to go back in time to watch this old classic. I believe it holds up incredibly well overall, and it has so much to say in just 26 episodes. Watching it reminded me a lot of Samurai Jack and Cowboy Bebop, especially with its use of masterful long takes and thick atmosphere. If you haven’t given this anime a shot, I strongly recommend checking it out on Netflix or wherever you can get your hands on it. It may not be for everyone, but for this kaiju-loving gal, it exceeded every expectation. 

[thewatsonbeekeepers]

Chapter 12: Three Men in a Boat [TFP 2/3]

[This was completely missing from my tumblr, via every search function and everything! So I’ve reuploaded - thanks anon for letting me know!!]

This section of the meta is going to deal with the events at Sherrinford – I’ve broken TFP up into three sections to try and get the most out of it. This isn’t just a read through like the first part of the meta, it has a specific structure, much like Eurus’s trials for the boys, so it’s really important to take this bit in one chapter. My hypothesis is thus – that each episode of s4 has been a different obstacle to be broken through in Sherlock’s mind, and that each of them is represented by one of the different Sherrinford tasks. It’s essentially an illumination of Sherlock’s progress through his mind – but it’s set up by Eurus, who is Sherlock’s mental barrier, so these are going to represent Sherlock’s darkest fears about each of the obstacles. Ready? Let’s go.

We take up the episode at the pirate hijacking, which is quite BAMF, but also illuminates a couple of things that we should bear in mind going into this episode. The first is that the transition from a blown up Baker Street to Sherlock and John hijacking a boat without a scratch on them is absolutely bizarre and leaves SO many questions – it’s dream-jumping of the most obvious kind. The second is that water has played a long role as a metaphor through the show, particularly in the EMP sequence, and it’s climaxing now – we are in the deepest waters of Sherlock’s mind.

Mycroft and John working together in the disguise sequence is metaphorically lovely – in the Oscar Wilde scene of the last part we saw Sherlock’s brain and heart finally coming together, and here for the first time they’re working together to give Sherlock the ability to go and confront Eurus. This is what makes Mycroft’s line so powerful. He says:

Say thank you to Doctor Watson. […] He talked me out of Lady Bracknell – this could have been very different.

Comic throwaway? Maybe. But given what we know about Lady Bracknell from the first part, this also has a more powerful meaning – heart!John finally stopped brain!Mycroft from being an obstructive force in Sherlock’s psyche, and they started working together instead to save him. This could have been very different is far more loaded than it sounds. All this whilst creating an image of Mark Gatiss as a Victorian aunt – wonderful.

When we first meet Eurus proper, her similarity to Sherlock is striking. She plays the violin – this isn’t a Holmes thing, because Mycroft doesn’t – it’s Sherlock’s motif throughout. Her hair is like a feminine Sherlock, her pallor and cheekbones match Cumberbatch. For reference, this is a picture of Sian Brooke and Benedict Cumberbatch together in real life.

I’ve done a section on why I think Eurus is the most repressed part of Sherlock’s psyche, and his traumatic barrier to love and life – I sometimes glibly refer to this as gay trauma, but that’s its essence. The similarity between Brooke and Cumberbatch in this scene is really compelling, looking the same but lit and dressed in opposite colours. Similarity and difference both highlighted. Even nicer, the white of Sherlock’s shirt is the same notable brightness as Eurus’s uniform, but it’s hidden under his jacket – a visual metaphor for her being hidden inside him.

Eurus gives Sherlock a Stradivarius as a gift. This should set alarm bells ringing for anybody who has seen TPLoSH. If you haven’t seen The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes, please do so immediately because my God you are missing out, but TLDR – a Russian ballerina offers Holmes a Stradivarius to have sex with her so she can have a brainy child, and he declines because he’s gay. (This is not just my interpretation, this is genuinely what happens, just to be clear.) Eurus giving Sherlock a Stradivarius is a deliberate callback to the film which Mofftiss cite as their biggest inspiration; just like the ballerina tempted Holmes to feign heterosexuality, so does Eurus – and both make clear that it’s not without its rewards, which is unfortunately true for real life as well. This moment in Sherlock’s psyche also recalls the desperate unrequitedness of Holmes’s love for Watson in TPLoSH, a reference to our Sherlock’s deepest fear at the moment – he has realised his importance but not John’s romantic/sexual love for him, as we’ll see. So here, trauma!Eurus isn’t just referencing closetedness, but is actively drawing on a history of character repression with which to torment Sherlock – metafictionality at its finest.

The Stradivarius is specifically associated with closetedness, but violins more generally in the show are used to show expressions of love that can’t be voiced out loud – think of John and Mary’s wedding, or the desperate bowing of ASiB. So Eurus, gay trauma that she is, telling Sherlock that she taught him to play is a moment of distinct pain – she is the reason he can’t speak his love aloud, but instead has to speak in signs.

When Sherlock plays ‘him’, rather than Bach, to Eurus (he has a big Bach thing with Moriarty in s2, take from that what you will because I don’t know!), he’s playing Irene Adler’s theme. As a fandom, we’ve generally agreed on associating Irene’s theme with sexual love, which ties in nicely with Eurus’s question – has Sherlock had sex? It’s unanswered. At the end of ASiB, Irene calls Sherlock the virgin, suggesting that he hasn’t.

My favourite moment in s4 without a doubt is Jim dancing to I Want To Break Free. I know it’s the most boring thing to say, but my two greatest loves are Andrew Scott and Freddie Mercury, so it was like Christmas. Here it is also Christmas, but there are two possible timelines. I hypothesise that this refers to Christmas 2010, but it’s absolutely conceivable that it could be Christmas 2009. If we acknowledge that Sherlock is in a coma in 2014, then five years ago is Christmas 2009; however, given that we’ve jumped to 2015 in dream time, I’m going to make the guess that Jim’s visit to Sherrinford is supposed to take place in 2010. This ties up with the idea that this is when Moriarty first started taking an interest in Sherlock, who had never heard of him before ASiP, particularly as this is all in the EMP.

I firmly believe that Jim represents the fear that John is in danger – I highlight this in the chapter on HLV, where you’ll recall we first encounter Jim in the EMP and he sends Sherlock on his journey through the EMP with the words John Watson is definitely in danger – a pretty big sign. Even without this, though, his biggest threat to Sherlock has always been hurting John, whether in TRF or with the idea of burning the heart out of him with Semtex. It’s not unreasonable then to assume that MP!Jim first getting inside Sherlock’s subconscious to represent this fear happens in 2010, when he first meets John. He slips in and stays there, and he melds with Eurus. We see this in the powerful visual of the two of them dancing in front of the glass as Jim’s image slowly becomes Eurus’s reflection – the fear of John dying embeds itself into the gay trauma that Sherlock has stored up, even without him realising it. This ties in nicely with the choice of I Want to Break Free, which is famous for its use of drag in the music video – Jim melding into Eurus is the dark side of queer genderbending that we hate to see. It’s also a pretty fitting song name for an intensifying of repressed gay trauma, even without the association with queer king Mercury.

[A side note to all of this – there were wonderful TEH metas about trains in tunnels being sexual, which isn’t just a tjlc thing but is a well-established idea in cinema – Moriarty’s consistent train noises here seem like a horrifyingly inverted version of that sexual longing.]

Task 1 – The Six Thatchers

The governor is set up as a mirror for John in this task, which provides some helpful context for the episode as a whole. Heart!John makes this comparison himself, by drawing out the similarity between the situation with the governor’s wife and his with Mary, though in this case the governor does kill himself because of his wife – or so it seems. The suicidal instinct matches with everything we’ve learned about John in s4, but I want to hypothesise, perhaps tenuously, that he’s more connected with Eurus than we might think. We know that Eurus has had control of the governor for quite some time, and one of the things we hear her saying to the governor in the background of the interrogations is that he shouldn’t trust his wife. This is an odd thing to pepper into the background when he’s about to commit suicide for her, and perhaps suggests that he’s more of Eurus’s pawn than he lets on, though I grant this may be spurious.

The idea that he distrusts his wife because of Eurus is important, however, because we’ve already seen John engage with Eurus in various forms, but this seems like an extension of E; Eurus, aka Sherlock’s hidden self, has been making John doubt Mary, even before she shoots Sherlock. John cannot know she’s a spy at this point, so it’s unlikely he’s doubting her goodwill; he’s simply doubting her.

Before we look at how the actual task impacts the governor and how that illustrates what’s really going on in TST, it’s worth pointing out that it is the governor’s engagement with Eurus which prompts the entire shutdown of Sherrinford and forces Sherlock (with brain!Mycroft and heart!John ever at his side, of course) to engage once and for all with Eurus. This points to everything that s4 has been telling us – that Sherlock’s understanding of the relationship between him and John, including his power to save him (we’re going to see the governor play the foil here) is what sends his brain into stay-alive-overdrive. Sherrinford is the peak of this.

Summary of the task, for those who hate TFP: Sherlock is given a gun and told he can pick either John or Mycroft to kill the governor, otherwise the governor’s wife will be killed by Eurus. As I’ve written about in its chapters, TST is about Sherlock trying to get to the bottom of Mary and why she tried to kill him – and, of course, the impact this will have on John. In brief, by displacing the shot onto Mary in his mind, he’s discounting his own importance and instead thinking about what it will mean for John to lose Mary. His greatest fear is that losing Mary will break John, and it isn’t until the end of TLD that he recognises that the return of John’s suicidal ideation isn’t over Mary, but over him. TFP presents the horror version, the version of TST that Sherlock’s trauma wants him to believe but which he has to overcome. In this case, Mycroft and John resolve to keep the governor alive in their passivity, but that passivity – Sherlock’s coma – is not enough to keep the governor from killing himself over Mary. This is the most feared outcome from Mary’s death that Sherlock can think of – his fear of losing John combined with John’s love of Mary, which in TST Sherlock is still taking as read.

Double naming in this show should never be neglected, and in this case we learn shortly before the governor dies that his name is David. Again, the dramatic manner in which we learn this (on the moment of execution) draws our attention to it – we know another David in this show.

Yup – Mary's ex who’s still in love with her from TSoT. So even though Sherlock is experiencing the panic of John killing himself for loss of Mary, his subconscious is still pointing out to him that that’s not what’s happening here. This mirror version of John that he has set up, who is broken by the loss of Mary as Sherlock fears in TST, is actually the other man in Mary’s life – even with Eurus forcing the worst possible scenario onto him, this still can’t quite fit John’s character. And so we move onto the second task.

Task 2 – The Lying Detective

This section of the Sherrinford saga is the three Garridebs, the closest thing that the fandom has ever got to a collective trauma. I do think, however, that it’s fully reclaimable for tjlc and means the same as we always wanted it to; I also think that it’s possibly the most gutting part of Eurus’s metatfictional power play.

If you haven’t read The Adventure of the Three Garridebs, it’s quite short and the most johnlocky of the Holmes canon, so I’d thoroughly recommend. For the purposes of mapping bbc!verse onto acd!verse, however, here’s the incredibly short version. A man called Evans wants to burgle Nathan Garrideb, so he calls himself John Garrideb and writes an advertisement from a man called Alexander Hamilton Garrideb (make of that what you will, hamilstans) declaring that he wants to bequeath his fortune to three Garridebs. “John” gets someone to pretend to be a Howard Garrideb to get Nathan out of the house to meet him – he comes to burgle the house but Holmes and Watson are lying in wait. He shoots Watson, and Holmes thinks Watson is seriously injured and so we have this wonderful section:

“You’re not hurt, Watson? For God’s sake, say you are not hurt!”

It was worth a wound–it was worth many wounds–to know the depth of loyalty and love which lay behind that cold mask. The clear, hard eyes were dimmed for a moment, and the firm lips were shaking. For the one and only time I caught a glimpse of a great heart as well as of a great brain. All my years of humble but single-minded service culminated in that moment of revelation.

“It’s nothing, Holmes. It’s a mere scratch.”

He had ripped up my trousers with his pocket-knife.

“You are right,” he cried with an immense sigh of relief. “It is quite superficial.” His face set like flint as he glared at our prisoner, who was sitting up with a dazed face. “By the Lord, it is as well for you. If you had killed Watson, you would not have got out of this room alive. Now, sir, what have you to say for yourself?”

Mofftiss have referenced this moment as being the greatest in the Holmes canon for them, the moment when we see the depth of Holmes’s affection for Watson, and so it seems odd to waste it on such a tiny moment in TFP. Many fans, myself included, were really upset to see Eurus drop all three Garridebs into the sea, the implication being that tjlc would never be real, and it was that moment that caused many (including me) to walk away. I came back, obviously, but I completely understand why you wouldn’t. However, I want to map one Garridebs story onto the other to show how they might match up.

The Garridebs that Eurus presents us with are not the three Garridebs from the story. In the story, there are three physically present Garridebs – Nathan, John and Howard – although admittedly only Nathan is an actual Garrideb. Alexander was completely invented by John and existed only in a newspaper advertisement. Evans, alias John Garrideb, is the criminal in the Garridebs story; Alexander is an invention.

So – what happens if we substitute John for Alex in bbc!verse, as in canon they are the same person? This is interesting, because double-naming means that John becomes the killer. Whilst it’s true that John Garrideb is known as Killer Evans for his murder of a counterfeiter back in America, in canon he is done for attempted murder – of John Watson, of course. Here we have a situation where a John is set up killing John. This is exacerbated by the victim in bbc!verse being called Evans; Roger Prescott, the counterfeiter, would have been a much more canonical nod to the books, so we can assume that the choice of Evans is therefore significant. It should be noted that Evans and John/Alex Garrideb are the same person in acd!canon - so killing Evans is a representation of suicide. But, in case we weren’t there yet, the reason that Evans took the name ‘John’ is acd!canon is very likely to be because Evan is Welsh for John – so whatever way you look at this situation, you have Sherlock deducing John killing John.

This is, of course, exactly what Sherlock deduces at the end of TLD, far too slow, when we see Eurus shoot John in an exact mirror of the shot from TST – I explained in a previous chapter why this means that John is suicidal without Sherlock. However, much like the passivity of Sherlock, John and Mycroft in the first task, here we see that Sherlock’s act of deduction is good, but can’t actually save anyone; Eurus kills off our Garridebs moment as Sherlock is left to watch, and it’s notable that heart!John is the most distressed about this. Remember, in the first task Eurus left Sherlock with an image of a John who was suicidally devoted to Mary, and although the Garridebs moment is one which metafictionally highlights the relationship between Sherlock and John, she’s still presenting him with a Garridebs moment in which he is fundamentally unable to save John. This is a direct result of the Redbeard trauma that Sherlock has experienced – helplessness is key to that, and this is what Eurus has come to represent in his psyche. But – Eurus isn’t real, Eurus is testing Sherlock, trauma trying to bring him down, and Sherlock’s job in TFP is to break through the walls that his consciousness has set up for him.

The power in Sherlock saying I condemn Alex Garrideb is heartbreaking, then, because it is Sherlock recognising that he is the reason that John is going to die. Eurus is there to make him confront that reality, which she explicitly makes him do. We get the split-second moment where he thinks he’s saved Alex, and then he’s plunged into the sea – but remember, this is Eurus taunting Sherlock, presenting him with worst-possible-scenarios. TFP is set up as a game for a reason – it is a series of hypotheses cast in Sherlock’s mind by his trauma that he has to break through one by one. Remember, although she’s ostensibly trying to hurt Sherlock, Eurus’s ‘extra’ murders in the first two tasks are aimed at hurting John, which wouldn’t make sense if he weren’t the mp version of Sherlock’s heart.

Task 3 – The Final Problem

Pretty much straight after this episode aired, people were pointing out that Molly is a clear John mirror and that pretty much all of the deductions Sherlock makes here could be about John. Again, we’re seeing Sherlock’s emotions being resolved in a heterosexual context – the presence of Eurus means that he’s unable to process them in their real, queer form. However, if we take Molly to be a stand-in for John in this scene, it may tell us what TFP is about – and the scenario that Eurus presents will be the worst one, the thing that is causing Sherlock the most pain.

TLD/the previous task have shown us that John is in imminent danger, so the transition to Molly Hooper’s flat being rigged with bombs is not a difficult one; we must assume this to be the suicidal ideation that we’ve just deduced. The time limit suggests that Sherlock is running out of time to save him (fucking right he fell into a coma SIX YEARS AGO). Putting Molly in a bad mood isn’t really necessary for this scene – they make her seem a lot more depressed than she would necessarily need to be, and they emphasise her aloneness and her ability to push people away, which isn’t something we know Molly to do. These traits are all much more important in the context of a suicidal John – they paint a much clearer picture of someone who is depressed and alone than we really need for this scene, where it’s not relevant to the surface plot.

Sherlock and the audience believe he has won this task, but of course he hasn’t - there were never any explosives rigged up in Molly’s flat, and it was a ruse to destroy his relationship with Molly. This is what he fears then – what if he’s wrong? What if coming back to life because he loves John won’t save him – it will destroy him and their relationship? The problem to be wrestled with is how to save John – according to the symmetry of these tasks, that is the final problem. We know that the scenario Eurus has presented isn’t real, but Sherlock doesn’t; he is being held up by his inability to cope with interpersonal relationships, and to get to the bottom of that we’re going to need to understand what he’s been repressing – part 3 of this meta.

There’s a wonderful shot just as Sherlock is destroying Molly’s coffin which zooms up and out through a ceiling window, all the way above Sherrinford, as though to emphasise not how remote Sherrinford is but just how deep inside it Sherlock is. Given what we know about the height metaphor as well as the water metaphor, this shot is a pretty clear way of telling us – this is as deep inside Sherlock’s mind as we go, this is the nub. But Sherlock smashing up the coffin has another powerful connotation – he's refusing death. In terms of metaphor, he’s refusing John’s death – there will be no small coffin, because he will not let it happen – but the visual of him smashing the coffin also suggests that he is rejecting his own death. The two are, of course, inextricably linked. Our boys’ lives are tied together.

Epilogue: The Hunger Games

I can’t watch this without thinking of The Hunger Games, I just can’t! But regardless of how much Sherlock seems like Katniss in this section, let’s press on. I don’t count this as one of the typical tasks, because this isn’t Eurus presenting a ‘haha I tricked you scenario’ - far from it. This is Sherlock’s way into unlocking his repression. The key takeaway from this scene, as we’ll see is that trauma has hurt Sherlock, and it’s going to try pretty hard here to mutilate him – but it can’t kill him.

We get a great line from Sherlock at the beginning of this, where he tells John that the way Eurus is treating him isn’t torture, it’s vivisection. Because it’s an experiment? Perhaps. But the more logical way to phrase this would be that it isn’t vivisection, it’s torture. Torture is much more emotionally charged than vivisection as a phrase – from a writer’s perspective, this phrasing is strange because it seems to negate rather than intensify the pain our characters are undergoing. Why, then, would vivisection be more important than torture? Well, put simply, vivisection is the act of cutting someone open and seeing what’s inside – and that’s what we’re doing. This isn’t just an analogy for experimenting on people, it’s an analogy for going literally inside somebody. In EMP world, then, these words are well chosen.

Sherlock is offered the choice – John or Mycroft? Heart or brain? We might initially think that this is Eurus pressuring Sherlock into death, but that’s not the case at all – we know from the early series that Sherlock has survived before (although very unhappily) with just one of these two dominating the other. It has taken his EMP journey to unite them into a functioning entity, and Eurus is bent on destroying that, mutilating either his emotional capacity or his reasoning, the two parts that make him human. This is a good sign, as well, that trauma has been acting on Sherlock through the first three series, when his psyche was dominated by brain!Mycroft - Eurus is keen to revert to that state, when trauma had control. It is touching, then, that brain!Mycroft is willing to relinquish that control and leave Sherlock with his heart, perhaps because this new unity allows him to recognise how damaged the Sherlock he created was. We should also note that this diminishing of Sherlock’s heart is compared to his Lady Bracknell, which we know to be his repression of all Sherlock’s romantic/sexual impulses – except this time it’s less convincing, because his brain doesn’t believe it anymore. What is also devastating is heart!John’s lack of self-esteem or knowledge, the sense that he isn’t useful to Sherlock, which of course will be proven wrong.

[if anyone has thoughts on the white rectangle on the floor, do let me know. It’s bugging me!]

Mycroft says that he acknowledges there is a heart somewhere inside of him – again, this is emotionally powerful in the context of the brain/heart wrangling that we’ve seen inside the EMP. Just as Sherlock’s psyche has tried to compartmentalise them all this time and they’re finally working together, now there’s an acknowledgement that the compartmentalisation into personae is maybe inaccurate as well – brain!Mycroft’s pretence to be emotionally detached is not in fact correct, as we’ve been suspecting for a long time.

Brain!Mycroft also states that it’s his fault that this has all happened because he let Eurus converse with Jim. If you spend any time thinking about the Eurus + Jim meeting, like many elements of this show it doesn’t make sense. There isn’t a feasible way this could have been planned, recorded etc in five minutes, and although it’s true that Jim could have come back to shoot the videos under the governor’s supervision, it’s not clear why he’s so important. Unless he takes on the metaphorical significance that we’ve assigned him, letting Jim see Eurus seems pretty unimportant – he is only the garnishing on Eurus’s plan. Instead, Mycroft is at fault for letting John be in danger – not only did Sherlock misdeduce Mary (although we can lay the blame for that at the feet of heart!John - see meta on TST), his reasoning was blinded and so he missed John’s suicidal urges and the danger to his life. Brain!Mycroft holds himself responsible – all of these EMP deductions are way late, comprised of things Sherlock should have noticed when his brain wasn’t letting his heart in.

Five minutes. It took her five minutes to do this to all of us.

The lighting is dramatic, so I can’t properly gauge Ben’s expression at this moment, but his eyes look crinkled in confusion, just like they are at the moments when a sense of unreality starts to set in in TAB. Indeed, these aren’t very appropriate words for when you’re about to kill your brother; it’s like he’s being distracted, like there’s something important that he’s missing. Mofftiss are drawing attention to the sheer impossibility of the situation – and Sherlock’s nearly there. His Katniss Everdeen move, threatening to kill himself, is the recognition that his trauma doesn’t have that power – it can hurt him and deform him by twisting his psyche into unbalance, like it has before and like Eurus is trying to here, but it cannot kill him. We can see that Sherlock has risen above the one-sided dominance that he began the entire show with when Eurus shouts at him that he doesn’t know about Redbeard yet – that’s not going to change his mind today, but it’s a direct throwback to the days when it would have, in ASiP with the cabbie. Character development, folks.

The shot of Sherlock falling backwards into the dark water links to two aspects of the EMP. One is the continued metaphor of water to represent sinking into the depths of his mind. The water is so dark it looks oily – it could be argued that this is the oil that is corrupting the waters of his mind as we finally cut to the repressed memories. I quite like this reading, though I have little other oil imagery to link it to in the show. The other notable point is the slow-motion fall backwards – instead of showing Sherlock, John and Mycroft all falling, we cut to Sherlock falling backwards exactly like he did in HLV when he was shot by Mary. This is a really clear visual callback. Even though we’re going deeper, we’re linking back to the original shooting, back in reality, suggesting that this depth is paradoxically going to lead us back to the start. To go back to the oil imagery, don’t forget that oil floats on water – although it looks like we’re sinking, there’s a real sense that these repressed memories are actually pulling us to the surface of Sherlock’s subconscious, quite unlike the deep zoom out we saw when Sherlock was destroying the coffin.

And that’s it for part 2 of the TFP meta! Part 3/3 will deal with such highlights as John not being able to recognise bones and presumably getting his feet pulled off by chains. Good thing this is just a dream. See you then!

[misscrawfords]

Okay. I've been sitting on this for two days so here we go.

I freely admit two things: a) I have not yet finished watching the show (only because I had to work... I will do!) and b) I do not have a PhD in film music so this is just an opinion.

I'm just really disappointed by the soundtrack.

The composer Joseph Trapanese has stated that he was inspired by Prokofiev, Russian fairytales and folk tunes. I've listened to the soundtrack several times through on youtube and I can sort of see that in places such as at the beginning of "Ask the Saints" and in "Ravka". But while I was watching the show I felt very much that the music sounded extremely generic "fantasy soundtrack" and when I walked away between episodes I couldn't think of a single memorable theme to hum back that really summed up the show. And until Alina's court demonstration, I did not feel the music was really adding too much to my understanding of the world. I couldn't put myself into the show's soundscape. Visually, it's incredibly evocative but in terms of audio... not so much. The interview linked above suggests Trapanese was aiming for themes for different characters and developing them thematically and maybe it's just too subtle for me but I feel the end result was lacking. Barring a few distinct moments, I could have been on another planet, in a generic period drama, in literally any fantasy story.

The setting of this show is a gift to a composer. It's fantasy Tsarist Russia for goodness sake! I was really expecting soaring Tchaikovsky alongside the deep sound of male voiced choirs. What we got was something oddly muted. Alongside this wonderful chocolate box of inspiration, you've also got characters and themes that lend themselves to Leitmotifs that twist and alter giving insight into motivations and hidden feelings - a big deal in this story. There was an opportunity for this soundtrack to sit alongside Lord of the Rings, Star Wars or Doctor Who which have all achieved this in an epic fantasy landscape.

As it is, even after listening through the soundtrack several times, I couldn't tell you what Alina's theme is, what the Darkling's theme is, what theme signifies "home", what the dregs' theme is, what the grisha music is, what the war music is... and I think that's a real shame. So for a totally pointless exercise, this is what I'd done with the soundtrack:

I'd start with establishing a theme/motif for the grisha as that's going to link many different different characters and themes. Out of that theme is going to come Alina's theme which we will not hear fully in all its glory until her court demonstration. Alina's full theme actually is the grisha theme which is heard elsewhere in playful or royal or warlike versions when the other grisha are present depending on what they are doing.

The Darkling's theme is an inversion of Alina's but they fit together perfectly and the resulting theme is the most seductive of the entire soundtrack.

The soundscape of Ravka is Tchaikovsky, Rimsky-Korsakov, Prokofiev, Rachmaninov. Full orchestra, lush.

The volcra have a broken, distorted version of the Darkling's theme.

Baghra has a sweeter, sadder, and more mystical version of the Darkling's theme. Perhaps turned major if the Darkling's theme is minor, for example. In fact her theme represents "magic" separated from the grisha specifically.

Alina's theme is based on a folk song. Which is first heard initially in a lighter, thinner, more rustic iteration before it has any association with the grisha. Similar instrumentation and melodic ideas are used in Mal's theme which is associated with the orphanage and Alina's past. When Mal reaches the Little Palace his theme also adapts to the lush orchestration of Ravka.

Deep, male voice choirs are used to build the sound scape of the First Army. The use of choirs will signify war and conflict so when the grisha are at war then they will also gain a choral sound. Deep, sparse folk songs will be used for Mal as a tracker and to convey the isolation and emptiness of his pursuit of the stag.

This soundscape is mirrored in the Fjerdan music which is also very empty and sparse and deep but instead of Russian influences, here we are going for the open bleakness of Sibelius and melodies of Grieg. There's opportunities for some very romantic sea music here in a Scandinavian style as the storm hits the ship.

Ketterdam and the dregs have a very different musical landscape. We're in fantasy Amsterdam now so I'd go for a baroque feel with rhythmic, precise strings and a very prominent harpsichord. Harpsichords can really sound very playful when they want and bass continuos can really give the sense of pushing forwards in a time frame which will give the dregs a sense of action and urgency to contrast with the more drawn out and lyrical music for Ravka.

Kaz, Inej and Jesper will each have their own instrument in this baroque soundscape. I see Jesper as a trumpet or horn, Inej as an oboe, and Kaz as the harpsichord. The continuous beating heart of their operation.

When they go to Ravka these instruments take their own journey as their plans differ during the heist and their individual themes meld more romantically with the Ravkan court music. The heist music itself is a lilting, off-kilter 19th century waltz based on the Ketterdam theme with romantic orchestration - and anachronistic harpsichord.

Nina's theme is a variation of the grisha music on the flute. Her theme becomes melded into the sparse Sibelius soundscape of the Fjerdans to give her and Matthias a love theme. But it will also eventually exist in the Ketterdam theme, pulling their sound forward a century or so.

You can use all these motifs to make subconscious connections. For example, using a male voice choir in the background of the Darkling's theme at times could signify his connection to war and destruction. Different orchestrations of her theme could signify the extent to which Alina is longing to go backwards (rustic, folk, Mal's theme) or fowards (more orchestrated, inverted for the Darkling). The use of the harpsichord even when the Crows are not around could suggest sneakiness and double-dealing is going on.

Anyway, y'know, the soundtrack as it stands is nice to listen to and has some very pleasant moments. But I still can't recall any memorable themes and I don't feel it really enhanced my understanding of the characters. Maybe this is just my problem with the story/writing and because I haven't got to the end of the series yet, but I'm finding it sometimes hard to engage with the characters and their motivations. Sometimes a character seems to be one thing and then the next moment they're making a decision and I'm not 100% sure why and I think I really well-articulated and subtle musical landscape would actually enhace the story so much.

[notesofarichlycolorednight]

eyooo!! i listened to firesorrow girl [TUMBLR | SOUNDCLOUD] by @gerrydelano and HAD A MIGHTY NEED (to also analyze this)

disclaimer: I have only listened to TMA through one (1), read it ONE time, so if you read something that seems wrong it probably is because my memory is not The Best (the seasons are 40 eps long and 30 mins each, Jonny why) and I’m probably straight-up not remembering or misremembering some aspect or detail about a character/a relationship/a part of their narrative

(and before you say it, i absolutely CANNOT just go relisten to an ep out of order. my nd brain Will Not Let Me until i have listened thru all 4 seasons, In Order, several times)

ALSO: i speak very definitively here, but it doesn’t mean i’m right abt my analysis

italics and bold are lyrics, normal is analysis. if there’s a way i can make this more accessible, lmk!

analysis under cut

little girl tries sleeping in the fireplace at home no one banished her inside it, she just lay down on her own she stares up into the darkness of the chimney and she hopes that someday she may go up in smoke this makes me think abt hilltop road first and foremost (but i have a feeling i’m missing something aljlkdjf) this is also the first hint to agnes’s wavering thoughts abt her being “the chosen one” for the lightless flame she’s already wishing she could burn, or in other words be normal

oh, the ends of her hair curl into embers in the wood beneath her head like a pillow, splintered shoulders in the soot flickers turn to flame and moves in kisses up her arms it loves her, so refuses her a scar i really like the imagery here bc, aside from the splinters, it evokes a softness embers are pretty, pillows are soft, “moves in kisses up her arms” really evokes a gentle intimacy, even before the line “it loves her” but then the last line really solidifies agnes’s relationship with fire--she wishes it would burn her but it loves her too much to do that, so she doesn’t

she doesn't burn oh, she learns again, reinforcing the motif agnes’s relationship with fire--the layers of 1) her not wanting this but 2) the first doesn’t care and loves her anyway i also see it as foreshadowing, or at least leading up to what she learns (put a pin in this)

pretty girl sits quiet in the coffee shop alone staring empty out the window like she used to do at home she feels his eyes fall down upon her from the counter, like a doe the ache of yearning blisters in her bones jack barnabas! hilltop road the use of doe, evokes the visual of “wide eyes,” which, in turn, evokes naivety--jack doesn’t know who agnes is, what she is, or that she could hurt him, even if she didn’t want to love, love, LOVE the fire motif here and used throughout the song--using fire metaphors bc it’s so fitting (put a pin in this)

he follows her up to the hill where water never works to send him down she broke his crown and blessed him with a curse her only kiss a smear of kerosene, a desperation unrehearsed and love made sure to let her know it hurts (love made sure it hurt) this only hit me like after the 5th time listening in a row, but LISTEN, “jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water.” i think it could also mean hilltop road, but i do think the stronger theme lies in that nursery rhyme. his name is jack and then to solidify that, “to send him down she broke his crown” vs. “jack fell down and broke his crown” i really love the contradiction of “blessed him with a curse” *ben from parks and rec voice* it’s about the layers. so listen, love is often seen as a blessing. but coming from agnes it’s a curse bc she burns anyone she touches. this is also in reference to her momentarily transferring her curse (the love from the lightless flame/fire) to him through her kiss “smear of kerosene”--another way of using a metaphor that evokes images of fire, and I LOVE IT “a desperation unrehearsed” MORE LAYERS YO. she knows what her touch will do to him but she’s so desperate to feel normal for even a second, she kisses him anyway “and love made sure to let her know it hurts”--going back to her curse, the love from fire/flame, and the destruction is causes bc of this. it could also be representative of how love can be very destructive. ppl often describe “the fires of passion” or passion as being like fire/hot *eyes emoji* i think the addition of “love made sure it hurt” could also communicate how the fire’s love for agnes is possessive--she cannot be normal or human or have any other relationship except with the lightless flame

he burns oh, she learns a parallel to “she doesn’t burn”--the striking difference between her and jack (the lightless flame and the rest of the world) what she learns here, tho, is also a parallel between what she learns at the beginning of the song there she is learning abt herself, here is is learning about everyone else

learns that breathing screamsmoke blackens hearts as much as lungs a heart motif, representative of love another fire-related metaphor that breathing in smoke doesn’t just fill your lungs with soot, but also covers the heart (love) in soot, as well a toxic love, as soot is bad for lungs and hearts it can’t be coughed back out and she can’t glisten like the sun using fire-related metaphors--the soot in her lungs and on her heart cannot be “cleaned” or cleared from her body with the body’s natural reaction to something obstructing breathing, which is coughing listen, i’ve said this before AND YOU’LL HEAR IT AGAIN: i really love “she can’t glisten like the sun” bc the whole point of fire, as the lightless flame sees it, is what the fear is named for: desolation. BUT fire is ultimately a neutral thing. if you respect and carefully control it, it can give warmth and life--like the sun (tho you can’t control the sun lmao). so there are positive aspects to. but not for agnes, given her upbringing and literally how she was conceived there’s no one left to save with love and no one she can touch affection is the pyre built on wildfire in the brush reinforcing her being unable to connect with normal humans bc of who she is ALSO i’m pretty sure this is referencing the bonfire she was born in--the ritual that made her the lightless flame’s messiah also, also, the use of the word “affection” uses the theme that fire itself love agnes, in it’s own, twisted way

her hands were only ever made to press through burning flesh and boiling tears won’t put it out but scald it like the rest referencing her birth again--that she was made to be this messiah for the lightless flame, for their ritual to remake the world through the lens of the desolation also more fire-related metaphors that i am IN LOVE with ugh, and, okay “boiling tears” communicates what agnes is feeling again--that she Does Not want to be their messiah, she just wants to be normal. she doesn’t want what the fire has given her but even her tears burn bc that’s what she is, what she was made for and the love of waxen women makes no difference in the end if never she can make and keep a simple human friend reference to jude, specifically, but other members of the lightless flame, as well. from what i remember, they all loved her but in the way that the fire loves her: possessive and toxic (like soot in the lungs) and then the reinforcement that she’s not human and cannot have the connection with humans she desperately craves, even if it’s just a tiny sliver

she can’t burn oh, she’s learned YO the difference between “she doesn’t burn” and “she can’t burn”--there’s a passiveness to it in the first line, but it’s more active in the second. here me out: as i said before, the “learn” lines communicate the inner thoughts of what agnes is thinking, the revelations she makes as he grows and lives. so “she doesn’t burn” communicates her learning and get used to the fact that fire doesn’t hurt her. versus “she can’t burn” communicates her knowing and accepting that the fire doesn’t hurt her, but she can hurt others with that very same fire. lowkey it’s so hard to articulate this difference, but this is the best my brain came up, hope it makes sense

YOOOO GIVE ME A MOMENT THIS NEXT PART IS MY FAVORITE PART

firesorrow girl says, “hang me up; i’d like to go” (i would like to go) referencing her death--her realizing that bc she’s fallen in love with jack, she can no longer lead the ritual for the lightless flame. but bro, listen, the addition  of “i would like to go” is a direct line to what agnes is thinking and feeling. more than not being able to lead the ritual, she doesn’t want to live like this anymore; doesn’t want to live her life unable to make connections with humans this isn’t quite a chimney she can column up to choke (i choose now to choke) a throwback to the first lines about her lying down in the fireplace and looking up through the chimney ALSO has a double meaning here, reinforced by what agnes is thinking: you can choke on smoke. her death involves literal choking the “i choose now to choke” again is a direct line to what agnes is thinking/feeling BUT ALSO a decision she finally gets to make autonomously the weighted hand upon her waist is chained there like a ghost, (always been a ghost) i know you’re probably tired of hearing but i ain’t gonna stop saying it. I REALLY LOVE THIS LINE. the lyrics say one thing, agnes’s internal thoughts say another bc raymond fielding is a ghost. not just like a ghost. he is one to her. i believe it was distortion helen who said that there was a scar on hilltop road. and we find out later that it’s bc hilltop road belonged to the web and even tho agnes burnt the house down, the web still left a mark on her. part of that mark is fielding, who i assume, was an avatar for the web. and it’s quite literal, as agnes never got rid of his hand he literally is a ghost haunting her bc of this but the rope she wears is woven cold with hope (yearning to be cold) THIS LINE BRO,,, i’m gonna say it I FUCKING LOVE IT. of course, referencing the rope she uses to hang herself BUT LISTEN “woven cold with hope” YOOOO THIS IS TAKING THE FIRE LOVES HER THEME AND TURNING IT ON ITS HEAD COMPLETELY she has been burning with fire this entire song, her body a raging inferno, contained in a body that appears human but hurts anything she touches. BUT AT THE END OF THE SONG WE GET THE COLD fire is often associated with warmth is often associated with hope, right?? but this time bc of the circumstances and what fire means to agnes and the lightless flame, being cold, not burning everyone she touches horribly, is her hope ”yearning to be cold” strengthens that message coldness is also associated with death, and here it’s quite literal but it’s also important to note that it’s also still agnes’s hope. so it’s still a very positive thing, even tho it’s associated with very negative things. bro,,, i gotta go lie down

those who can remember sing her name out like a prayer (i am not your prayer) the lightless flame, of course, bc they are a cult. don’t @ me, i’m right BUT “i am not your prayer”: again, a direct line into agnes’s thoughts. she never wanted, nor asked to be their messiah. she was thrust into the position against her will as she was literally borne in flames. from birth she had this shouldered on her. and she doesn’t want it, even in death the music to it hollow of the truth in her despair (hollow with despair) goes along with the “prayer” for her above: the lightless flame sing and mourn her but they’re not mourning her, not agnes, they’re mourning their messiah, the one who was going to lead them through a ritual that would remake the world. their words ring hollow bc of this. and it hurts even more with “in her despair” bc even in agnes’s despair at not being able to connect with a human, as well as not being able to lead the lightless flame like they wanted her too, they’re only mourning the idea of agnes they’ve created in their minds, not who agnes really was in wickerwind the crackleburn of candles cries for fate (i rewrite my fate) and firesorrow girl may someday be chosen again (firechosen girl, again) i LOVE the use of “wickerwind” and “crackleburn.” no analysis i just love the way they sound okay but the “cries for fate.” i think this has a lot of meanings. one is the fire crying out either about agne’s ultimate fate (having to kill herself or die, anyway) and/or crying out for another to fill her position (putting agnes’s fate onto someone else’s shoulders). another is the lightless flame also crying out for the same reasons. and the third is agnes, herself, crying out about her unfair fate. i think that last one is strengthened by “i rewrite my fate.” a common but powerful theme in many stories of a character defying fate bc it’s unacceptable to them. it’s also wholly contradictory to what the lightless flame wanted and then, of course, the second line strengthens the idea that they’re already looking for another messiah for their ritual

and so the wheel turns ‘round and ‘round

final note abt the music that is probably wrong bc i’m not musically inclined BUT i have been listing to sideways on youtube, who is very musically inclined. and that makes me an expert right? /s anyway, what i wanted to note abt this musical structure is that the beats aren’t the usual 4/4 that most popular songs use these days.

and what that means is that you get gratification ever 4 beats. (sideways describes it way better than i ever could here) this song doesn’t follow that structure (i think lakjlkdjf again, i’m not musically inclined at all) and i think it really adds to the theme of how agnes feels: trapped with this fire burning inside her until she finally chooses freedom (tho i know it’s more complicated than that in-verse).

now whether was was purposeful or not, i have no idea. but still a cool detail i, personally, noticed.

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again hope it was semi-coherent. as with my other analysis, i just listened to the song and wrote what i was thinking, stream of consciousness

bloodwater ballad analysis | bonus meme i made for these analyses bc it’s funny and i wanted to share