#but i still want to live at the end of the day

[strange-aeons]

hi strange i’ve been enjoying yr videos for about four years thank u for giving me giggles for so long. however i am writing as i am not totally sure who else to ask…

my boyfriend had a traumatic pneumothorax last week and about 80% of his right lung collapsed. i don’t really know anything about pneumothorax (although i have learned so much recently lol) aside from hearing you mention it and as such i don’t know how to help him :(

i know it’s a shot in the dark but i was wondering if there are any comforts or ways to alleviate pain you could share? thank you so much strange you are super tough btw to have gone through this several times this Sucks big time

many good wishes to you and your sweet hairless babies in the new year!

If it happened one week ago he’s already gotten through the worst part! I’m assuming he’s still hospitalized with a chest tube in right now??

When I was in that situation it helped a lot having frequent visits from my partner and family. Especially when they brought snacks!!!!!! Hospital meals can be borderline inedible and there’s no way of escaping to the food court when you have a chest tube in (unless you plan to deceive multiple nurses and risk life threatening infection through the OPEN HOLE IN YOUR CHEST. Don’t do that).

Good food can be a relief in an otherwise horrible time, so finding out what he really wants to eat and brining it will definitely help. If he has no appetite then things like smoothies or drinkable soup can be very helpful. I often live off booster juice and Tim Hortona chicken noodle soup when hospitalized.

Finding the right media to keep sane is also very important!!! Your sleep schedule disintegrates entirely when laying on your back full of tube for multiple days. 2AM listening to alarms go off and 6AM getting woken up for x-rays and 1pm having the lunch slop delivered and 3pm being woken up for x-rays and 9pm visit from your surgeon all become basically indistinguishable, especially if you have no windows. Podcasts were ideal for me because it can be very hard to find a comfortable position with a chest tube / pneumothorax and looking at a screen was often too much of a hassle. Queer as fact and fall of civilizations are both excellent if you want non fiction btw. Old gods of Appalachia or welcome to nightvale if you want fiction.

There’s not a lot that you as a loved one can do about his physical pain, but I will share some of my pneumothorax expertise with you and anyone else who might go through this.

There’s no nerve endings in the lungs so all the pain/ discomfort related to a pneumothorax has to do with pressure in the chest cavity.

The pain is the absolute worst when your lung is actively collapsing so when that feeling starts SHOVE SOME EXTRA STRENGTH ADVIL OR TYLENOL DOWN YOUR THROAT, then lay down and wait for it to finish collapsing. It may seem tempting to rush to the hospital as fast as possible (or rush your loved one who’s lung is collapsing to the hospital) but trust me the last thing you want to do with a lung that is actively deflating like a sad balloon is exert yourself (this is how I collapsed my lung the full 100% and could not move my upper body for an hour. Quirky). Give it at least 30 minutes of floor time before you try to move. You will have a way better time getting to the hospital.

Wait sorry I lied lung re-inflation hurts sometimes more than the initial collapse. The sometimes are the times when ER nurses do not know how to do it properly. Immediately after they put the chest tube in, they attach it to a suction machine to suck out the excess air in your chest cavity. I do not know if these machines are the same internationally (I’m Canadian) but if you’re dealing with one where the settings are percentages, the one you want is 20% suction. NOT 100%!!! that just causes unnecessary excruciating pain without being more effective. I have had to fight numerous nurses while in the worst pain of my life to TURN THE PAIN MACHINE DOWN. fuck the pain machine. Anyway. After the pain machine they leave the tube in for a few more days to make sure the lung stays inflated. Nearing the end of that process, most of the discomfort is caused by the tube itself, so as horrible disgusting the worst getting that thing ripped out is, just know you will feel so much better after.

Throughout the healing process (and in the case of small pneumothoraxes not requiring chest tubes — I’ve had over 10 of those ones) I’ve noticed that heightened discomfort lasting a few minutes results from going from laying down to standing up or vice verse, or from bending over. This is why I have pioneered the sophisticated technique know as the pneumothorax squat. It is just as cool and hot as you’re imagining.

This post was supposed to be about how to support a loved one with a pneumothorax what the heck am I even talking about now.

Most of what he’s going to need will seem boring or insignificant. Companionship. Food. Medication. Toiletries. COMPANIONSHIP. podcast recommendations. But it absolutely is not insignificant. Abruptly losing mobility, independence, and bodily autonomy as a young person is really fucked up and I cannot fathom doing it without my family and my partner, even if most days that consisted of talking to me and bringing me smoothies and underwear.

Wishing a quick recovery to your boyfriend! Good luck with everything!!

[bladu-bladu]

I've lived in many places, moved many times, had to start over friendships again and again. Some people keep calling and you want to keep calling them; some people turn out to be only friends of proximity, and once you're no longer around each other, the friendship cools.

I have childhood friends that still live in that city and we are friends because once in three years i show up on their doorstep and say hey there im alive, and they say lets go out one of those days, and then i leave and we will see each other in a few years once again. I don't have their number and I don't want their number, because we dont have anything in common anymore, but we have been friends for decades because that's what we were when we last played together and it is enough to see them healthy and happy even if i dont know the particulars.

I had a friendship that lived on 6 month old message replies, and it was important and meaninful and i very much didnt care all that much about the time it took to answer, because if i said "im coming over next week" id have a spam of gushing and plans making and lets go there and there and do this and that and youre staying for how long and stay a few days at my house. And we would talk about everything and update each other on our lives and sometimes not talk at all, but just being around and realising that yes, we like each other still! was great. It is very strange to be making plans to visit and knowing they're not there anymore, they're not here anymore, but the urge to message is still strong, the friendship is still there, even thought they aren't.

I have a frienship that survived end of school, end of college, moving cities and states and a decade without seeing each other. And i asked for a place to stay and they said you can stay as long as you need. Live with me.

I have a friendship that started at work, and they said they feel inferior because oh you know so much about so many things, and i said you know just as much as i do, everytime you and our common friends talk, i know zero references, i dont know the people, the shows, the meaning, the implication, so who knows more than the other here? and i asked to be invited to their wedding and they started giggling. we have nothing in common besides our profession, and i wish to hold this person forever.

I've had friendships that i thought would survive distance but frizzled out. That i thought were meaningful, but were for (their) convenience. That i thought were real, but where only of proximity.

Maybe it's from the experience of having started over and over and over, but letting go of those that give you nothing but the taste of pain isn't the end of the world. The loneliness, the feeling of being unmoored and what do i do with my time that was theirs before fades away, and you find something else to occupy yourself with, you meet new people. Maybe you stay as acquaintances for years until you or they reach out. It does need courage, it does need work, but it is so very much worth it.

Also re: the fact it’s normal to have a period of time where you have no friends: sometimes this means no “real” friends aka still have people you know from work, school, family, neighbors, acquaintances, etc etc you interact with but are not close with and couldn’t go to for anything on any deeper level. But sometimes it actually does mean no friends. No social interaction, nobody to call, no other option, don’t talk to anyone for days, don’t know who would find out if you died. The thing is there really is coming back from both of those situations ofc it takes a good deal of work and can feel like pulling teeth to put yourself out there but god it pays off. You can always start over from scratch, and it’s true most people are just as lonely as you are

[multific]

Between Doubt and Secrets

Emperor Geta x Reader

Summary: When Geta and Caracalla left to attend to their duties as Emperors, you stayed behind due to sickness. Geta returns he notices just how distant you are, a week passed and he thinks he knows the reason behind your coldness. 

The sound of his boots on the stone floor echoes in the quiet of the palace, each step bringing him closer to you. 

After what feels like an eternity, Geta is done with his daily duties. 

Normally, that would be a relief, a reason to smile.

But tonight, the air between you feels different. It’s heavy with a secret you’ve carried alone for far too long.

You stay by the window, watching the fading light of the setting sun. You were nervous. 

The day is ending.

The news of your child you have known for over three weeks now. The doctor confirmed your suspicion and your heart sank. 

A child wasn’t part of your plan. At least not now.

In truth, it’s thrown everything into chaos. 

But now Geta is back, and the tension in the room is thick.

When he steps into the room, his presence fills the space. 

His eyes immediately find you, but there’s something different about his look tonight. 

It’s not the warmth you’ve grown to know, not the loving look he only gives to you. 

No, tonight his eyes are sharp, suspicious. His brow furrows just slightly as he approaches.

“Where have you been today?” he asks, his voice even, too calm for the question. He was angry.

In the morning he did ask to see you, but you failed to.

For a moment, you stop. 

You weren’t expecting interrogation, weren’t prepared for it. His eyes are searching, like he already knows something.

“I was... outside. Just needed some air.”

He doesn’t immediately respond, but you can see the suspicion in his eyes.

It doesn’t take much for him to read you, to notice when something’s off. To know when you lie.

And for the last week he has been home, something has been off.

“You’ve been distant,” he says after a long pause. “Too distant. I’ve been gone for weeks, and it feels like you’ve shut me out.”

His words cut deep, though you know he doesn’t mean to hurt you. 

He doesn’t understand. 

He hasn’t seen the turmoil you’ve been living with, the fear that’s kept you awake at night.

“I’m not... I’m not shutting you out,” you say, your voice barely above a whisper. “It’s just... a lot has happened while you were gone.”

He steps closer, his eyes narrowing. 

“What kind of ‘a lot,’ exactly? Have you been seeing someone else while I’ve been gone?”

The accusation hits you like cold water. 

It’s not anger that fills his voice but hurt. 

The kind of hurt that makes your stomach swirl. 

You want to tell him that it’s not like that, that there’s no one else. But the truth is so much more complicated. And far more frightening.

“Geta, no,” you say, your voice trembling. “There’s no one else. I’ve been alone while you were gone. It’s just... I’ve been trying to figure things out.”

He watches you for a long moment, and you see the doubt still in his eyes. 

You know he’s not convinced. 

But you don’t know how to explain the truth. 

How could you tell him that you’re carrying his child when you haven’t even come to terms with it yourself?

How could you tell him that you have been inside all day trying to figure out how to finally tell him?

Especially when he specifically told you he is not ready for a child. Only the senators demand such a thing. And he doesn't want to give into their needs.

He had enough to care for already, the Empires, his brother and now this.

For a long moment, the room is silent. You tried to collect your thoughts as you played with the hem of your dress.

You and Geta loved each other. Your love was known far and wide for its fire.

Then, finally, you collect yourself. You took a deep breath and realized, you needed to say it.

“Geta... there’s something I must tell you.”

His eyes shoot up to yours, but he doesn’t interrupt, doesn’t say a word. He just waits, watching you closely, as if bracing himself for whatever you’re about to say. He prepared for the worst, he is scared you are about to break his heart.

“I’m pregnant,” you finally say. The weight now lifting from your shoulders but it fills the room instead.

The silence that follows is thicker than the air.  Almost makes in impossible to breathe.

His expression shifts from one of anger to one of pure confusion. 

He was a smart man, he probably connected the events already.

“Pregnant?” he repeats, voice low. “But... how? Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“I didn’t know how to tell you,” you whisper, your hands trembling as you spoke. “I wasn’t sure what to think, and... I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

“Disappoint me?” he shakes his head. “I... I don’t understand. I thought you were... I thought you were pulling away from me, that you found someone.”

“How can I find anyone Geta? I love you so much. I just didn’t know how to tell you. I didn’t expect this. I didn’t plan for it. And what you said about the senators... I was scared.”

He falls silent, staring at you for a long time, as if frozen in time. He realised it was all his fault. That day, he spoke out of anger, he didn't realise just how much pressure that put on you.

In reality, he always wanted a child with you, just on your own terms.

After a moment, he steps closer, his hands trembling as they reach out to you.

“Are you truly pregnant?”

You nod, and a single tear slips down your cheek. The weight that’s been crushing you lifts just a little.

Then, without warning, Geta pulls you into his arms. 

It’s a sudden and tight hug as if he’s afraid to let go of you. 

His embrace is tight, warm, and for the first time in what feels like forever, you allow yourself to believe that everything will be okay.

“I thought I’d lost you,” he murmurs against your hair, his voice thick with emotion. “I thought... you didn’t want me anymore.”

You pull back slightly to look at him, searching his eyes, you offer him a warm smile. 

“I do want you. I just... I was scared. This wasn’t how I imagined it would happen.”

He brushes a hand over your stomach gently. 

“You’re carrying our child, the future of Rome.” he says softly, the disbelief still evident in his voice.

“I am,” you reply, your voice catching in your throat.

His hand rests on your stomach, his fingers warm and protective. "I'm not leaving your side again. And what I said about the senators... I don't care for them. I care for you, I love you. I will protect you and our child. I promise."

For the first time in weeks, you allow yourself to breathe. 

“We’ll be okay,” you whisper, more to yourself than to him, but he hears it.

Geta presses a soft kiss to your lips, pulling you close again. His voice and heart beat fill you with hope. 

“I promise.” he whispered again. 

And you knew Geta always kept his promise.

Suddenly, your baby felt like a blessing. The future of Rome and you.

Gladiator II Collection

Taglist: 

@castellandiangelo @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl @manduse @jacalineiscomingforyou

@mandoloriancookie @deliciousfestsalad @lilliumrorum @asgards-princess-of-mischief  

@fallout-girl219 @dracaryxzs @snowtargaryen @brevlada24

@mel-vaz @akamitrani @ange-olras @nicholaschavezslut69

~Masterlist~

ˇAO3ˇ

/YOU DO NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO TRANSLATE, TO STEAL OR TO REPOST ANY OF MY WORKS TO THIS OR OTHER PLATFORMS/

[madamechrissy]

I'll look After You

Pairings: Satoru Gojo x fem reader (reader is a mom)

Summary: You longed to hear from Satoru, After an epic night hooking up in a club bathroom, sure you'd been strangers, but he has your number, he made you feel so special... but... he never contacts you again. Ten months later, you have a beautiful baby named Reign, with those exact blue eyes. You never saw him again, couldn't even find him, so now, you are living your life as a single mom. Messy bun, dark circles, exhausted, you run into Satoru one day, and he sees her, his baby girl, and sees you struggling, he knows then, you're what's been missing in his life.

CW: Going to be sweet and emotional, Satoru is a freaking doll, misunderstanding led to him not knowing (nothing is kept from anyone on purpose) Fluffy long oneshot where Satoru falls in love with reader and his little girl. Gojo being a dad and being cute! Will have smut at the end as all my oneshots do lol, so MDNI, and flashbacks to the original bathroom smut (will list all the warnings when it comes out!)

Preview below! Comment to get added to the taglist when it's out!! (Soon!!) <3

You often wondered about him, Satoru was his name.

As you look down at your baby girl, with her brilliant blue eyes while she’s cooing happily, giving you a gummy little grin, you wonder what he’d think if he knew about her. The random guy at the bar you gave your number to after hooking up in a bathroom, the guy who never called, the guy with no social media of which to speak. The guy you never, ever saw again.

Your baby’s father, the best thing that ever happened to you, surely, but also it was very difficult, being a single mom, you’d have to go back to work soon which you were dreading, spending sleepless nights up feeding, changing her. It had been a rough pregnancy, and a shocking one at that, people had questioned you over and over, some mentioned not having her.

But something in you knew you could do this, you could have this baby, you’re broke as fuck but she has all she needs, and she makes you so happy, but those eyes are unmistakable. No one has eyes like that, except her and her… well was he really her 'dad'? You wonder if he’d run ten million miles from you if he knew, or would he have been okay with it?

It’s odd that just a night of fun, alcohol and being on antibiotics created this amazing little girl, but you can’t be upset, not when she brightens your world. But you still ache at times, for her to have a dad, you hope you’re enough. You wonder about him though, the bright energetic man, the one that had made you feel more in one evening than anyone ever.

The last man you’d been with.

Yes, it’s been that long, Reign was two months old, so you’re damn near at a year, you say it’s because you’re so busy, but something deep in you knows that you felt something for him, deeper than the obvious physical. Something about how he looked at you, at how he laughed, at how he made you feel so special.

You assume it must have been some act, clearly, here you are, alone after all. You both only knew each other’s first names, it’s true, but he had that number. Maybe it wasn’t all you thought it was? Maybe he just was that sort of guy, the one that made women think they’re his everything with one of his kisses, maybe you were just too drunk, and he was too pretty.

You blink a bit, shaking the haze thoughts of him as you yawn a bit, exhausted from Reign keeping you up all night, her tummy had been hurting. You’re sleepily putting things in the cart, baby items, groceries, the essentials, you catch sight of yourself in the mirror above the produce, wincing then. You have a messy bun and are in pajamas, god help you if you ever wanted to meet a guy.

‘Oh hi, I have a baby with a random blue eyed dude from a bar, I’m broke as fuck, and I wear pajamas to the store. Wanna date?’

Yeah. That would go over well.

“It’s… it’s… you!?” You sleepily look up then, so exhausted you barely register the six foot three man for a moment, then suddenly it all hits.

He stares at you, those blue eyes, the eyes your baby has, wide now, his pouty pink lips dropped open. He’s just as gorgeous as you remember him, like it’s some dream, you feel weak then, chest rising and falling as your breaths come too quickly. He steps closer to you then, he hasn’t seen her yet, nestled in her little car seat on the cart, you’re panicking.

“Do you even remember me? Oh my god, that night my phone broke, and I had just got it, they couldn’t transfer the numbers! And I tried to look you up? But I couldn’t find you… and I never saw you… and then- fuck I’m rambling.” He laughs nervously, swiping his hand through his snowy locks. “Forgive me, please… what I mean to say is… Hi?”

“Hi…” Your baby whines then, and Satoru pauses, blinking and you move to the side then, he steps closer when Reign opens her eyes, grinning at him.

Satoru’s heart pounds in his chest, his entire world tilts on its axis, he was already so thrown off by seeing you again, the girl he hasn’t been able to stop thinking of, but now… he looks at you in shock, you look exhausted, but so beautiful, your eyes tear up then, he watches your shoulders slump, then he looks back at the baby, realization sinking in.

“She’s… is she… there’s no way…”

“She’s yours, I only hooked up with you for the past… year.” You manage to say softly, right in the middle of the fruit aisle, Satoru was finding out you have his baby.

“You did this alone?” He says then, blinking back emotions for a girl he barely knew, but who now has a part of him, a part he wants to know so badly suddenly, shocking him.

“I had no clue who you were, how to tell you, even if so, it’s not your responsibility okay? I take care of her just fine, I make it work.” Satoru’s heart breaks then, seeing how tired you are, seeing the endless baby items and cheap toilet paper, a cheap bottle of wine, is that all you get yourself?

You did this alone, you have his baby alone, altering your life while he’s living his just the same, partying with his best friends, working and living a luxurious life. Satoru was rich, and it’s clear his baby and his baby’s mother are struggling, and he’s here doing what? Could he have tried harder to find you!? Could he…

“We’re okay, you don’t have to worry. I’d never come for you for anything, I am happy being her mommy.” You say with a tired smile, reaching to touch her little chubby cheek, and Satoru has never seen anything so beautiful, the two of you.

He’s felt so empty for this year, is this what he was missing?

“Can I… please… can I know her?” He asks, gulping now, and you blink in shock, nodding quickly.

“I would love that.” You can’t stop your tears then, sniffling and shaking your head. “Please, let’s talk outside of the produce aisle?” You whisper, he nods quickly, unable to take his eyes off you, off his baby.

Coming sooon- based loosely on a request for @bunheadusa hehe, prob gonna be long I can't help myself.

perma tags- @alt--er--love @cuntphoric @seeing-stars-alt @nanasukii28 @labelt-san @makingtimemine @aldebrana @n1vi Perma Gojo tags: @chiyokoemilia @haruhatake @strychnynegirl <3

[the-original-skipps]

|| Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine x Reader || Headcanons || Honkai Star Rail ||

you guys voted so here it is! I tried to write it without the yandere but I couldn’t lol also I got another yandere pirate aven where’s he’s alive if yall wanna check that out

HUMAN VER.

CW: slight sexual content. forced relations. major yandereness. ghost possession. non-consensual touching. mentions of death & the afterlife.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who feels himself standing by death's door but doesn’t want to actually die. He thought he’d be able to accept it or welcome it even - it’s what he’s always wanted; to be free from this cursed life but images of you flash through his mind as he takes his last breaths.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who before he completely loses himself to the beckoning darkness, silently pleads for death not to take him. There’s so many things he wants to see, to accomplish, that lost treasure he’s yet to find - but most of all he wants to remain beside you longer.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who realizes his luck somewhat saved him again as he’s now a ghost. He’s disappointed that he no longer has a mortal form, completely phasing through any physical object. He also no longer feels urges like hunger or sleep but one urge still remains within him. The urge to see you again.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who leaves the cold waters of the ocean to roam the mortal realm to try to find you again. He’s not sure how long it’s been since he died, he’s not sure if you’re even alive but he needs some closure. Maybe if you’ve died, he hopes that by gaining that knowledge there will be no more lingering regrets tying him to this world. He’d pass on, hopefully to see you in the afterlife. Though he doubts that sinners like him wouldn’t end up in the same place as you.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who has supposedly died but is somehow here in your very living room. After an excruciating long time, he manages to find you alive and well. He looks the same as the last time you’ve seen him except now his fingers have turned blue. Ghostly blue orbs floating around him as he smiles at you gleefully.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who decides to bind himself to you. It’s the whole reason he’s still alive right? The gods he never believed in - they’ve heard his pitiful last wish to remain by your side. They’ve granted it to him! He’ll remain by your side until death comes knocking at your door too. Then you’d be together forever right?

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who’s just as mischievous and teasing as when he was still alive but only this time you can’t do anything against him. He’d play countless pranks to scare you - delighting in your frightened expressions. He’ll randomly appear behind you, make objects float around you and purposely make sounds late into the night to frighten you into not sleeping. Don’t sleep, he’s awfully lonely when you do that.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who spends every single second attached to your side. Even if you’re at home or outside in town - he’s there floating around you. Not only is he always there, he also never stops talking. He can’t help it, he’s got no one else to talk to and you’re the only one who can see him.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who likes to whisper distracting and sometimes dirty things in your ear when you talk to other people. Making it hard to concentrate and for the other person to look at you weirdly. Because why are you glancing at something behind them? There’s nothing there right? Right?

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who asks - borderline pleading for you to let him possess you. It’s been awfully long since he’s done anything besides being glued to you. You don’t always respond to him either, choosing to ignore him, he needs something else to do. So he constantly asks you to the point of annoyance to give up your body for him. Which one day succeeds because you’re tired of listening to him - even when you’re trying to sleep he doesn’t leave you alone. A decision you’d come to regret.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who immediately breaks the rules you’ve set for him once he’s possessed your body. He can’t help it, there are just so many things he’s always wanted to see you do but you keep refusing to. So he uses this opportunity to make you pull different faces and say things you’d normally not say for his amusement. Is it weird to feel his heart fluttering when he makes you say things like you love him, that you only need him - even though he’s the one who’s controlling your body to do these things?

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine after being deprived of you for so long, wants to play with your body. He’s missed you deeply, the sight of your bare skin reflected in the mirror inducing excitement within him - your body. It’s a strange feeling he must admit as he runs your hands through your body, wanting to know what makes you tick. He can’t help it, he wants to know everything about you, especially what makes you feel good. As your hand inches closer to your most sensitive parts, Aventurine thinks to himself. You wouldn’t mind if he played a little right? Your body would definitely enjoy it.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who had to forcibly peel himself from the mirror finally heads into town to indulge himself. He doesn’t want to spend the money you painstakingly made so he has to earn some himself. Aventurine in your body hits up the largest tavern in town to gamble. It didn’t take long for him to sweep the table clean of riches, all for his taking. The usual accusations of cheating happens, and a fight breaks out. The last thing he wants to do is to get injuries on your precious body so he ends the fight quickly and cleanly. He has some shopping to do after.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who lays down beside you on your bed after enjoying a night out in town. As much as he enjoyed possessing you, he misses your actual presence. So, he lays there beside you until you wake up. When you do, you almost jump out of your skin with how close his face is to yours. You feel as if you’ve gone into the deepest sleep, not remembering anything after you gave Aventurine permission to possess you. You immediately ask him what happened and what he’s done while he controlled your body. Only for him to give you a teasing smile. Which makes you horrified and confused as to what he’s done. Also as to why your room is filled with ribboned boxes.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine as days goes by starts to become more possessive of you - wanting to monopolize you. He keeps track of the people in your life, who they are and what they mean to you. He wants to get rid of them one by one until you have him remaining. So, don’t be so surprised to hear that your friends want nothing to do with you anymore - or if the person who was seemingly interested in you disappears. Oh, they got into a tragic accident? How unfortunate! Don’t look at him like he didn’t do anything or so he wants you to believe.

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who’s starting to miss touching and holding you like he used to when he was still alive. At this point he’s starving for the feel of your skin on his hands again. He ponders if he should possess someone to make that happen but he doesn’t want anyone else’s hands to touch you even if he’s in control of it. He’ll just have to find some other way then. He’s heard rumors of a sea witch who supposedly grants people’s wishes. Maybe he’ll pay her a visit?

Yandere Ghost Pirate!Aventurine who contemplates every now and then when you’d die. If you died would you also become a ghost? He ponders this question a lot in his abundant free time. What if you just pass on? There are too many uncertainties, he needs to find the answer. When the time comes you’ll gladly join him right? No? Well, he has ways to make it happen whether you’re willing or not. Only then would you both be truly bound to each other, beyond life and death. 

[thanosscross]

Baby - Choi Seung Hyun x reader

A/n: I decided to do both!! I didn't want anybody to feel like I chose one over the other, so here is our first fic, next up will be pre games! Thanos x reader, but what do you think, smut, fluff, angst?

Summary: After going to a club you met a quite intoxicating man, who you later found out to be the same person you and your friends were going to see live

Warnings: Implied smut, drinking

You were a regular at the certain club you were at, both you and friends, so whenever the line was out of the door you were all confused, slowly making your way through, waving at the bouncer as you walked in you noticed the club a lot more alive than usual, along with a group of guys dancing around with drinks on the dance floor. As you made you way day, you made eye contact with the taller one of the group, you friends cheered rushing to the bar to start your adventure of friday night drinking.

It didn't take long for you to be tipsy from the drinks, making your way to the floor whenever your friend's favorite song came on, you just laughed dancing along with her and your two other friends, that was until you noticed the one guy staring at you while talking to his friend. "Hey...do you see that guy?..he's been staring since we got in" You asked, not knowing if you should be flattered by the staring or not, but instead your friend just laughed "Look how tall he is! Go talk to him I bet he's hot too!" She cheered before spinning you around to the music before shoving you over in their direction.

Seung Hyun smiled watching you spun over very disoriented and starting to lose your balance, as you were now tipsy and dizzy, squealing whenever you felt two hands catch your hips, halting your spins and stumbles "Oh my goodness! I am so sorry m-my friend!-" The mystery man just shushed you with a soft very attractive chuckle "You're okay baby" He replied, leaning close to your ear to be heard over the speakers, you blushed brightly and for a minute you were happy it was darker in the club, his voice was on the deeper side "Choi Seung hyun" He whispered lower to your ear, making your shudder under his touch, only now realizing his hands were still placed on your hips. "What? o-oh! y/n" You smiled resting your hand on his forearm, feeling just how much muscle was hiding under the suit jacket he wore. "You're a great dancer" He laughed, you were in awe, just this man's voice and laugh was enough to want to give over your hand in marriage.

You continued to dance with each other for a few more songs, feeling the alcohol start to take over you again as you turned around placing his hands on your waist as you continued to dance with him. Once the song ended, he laughed leaning closer to you if possible "Hey, my friends and I are leaving..if you wanna grab a drink for the road and come with?" he asked hands still placed firmly on your waist, you just nodded lightly against his chest, he just laughed in replied, he couldn't help it, between the alcohol and how absolutely adorable he thought you were being right now was like a laughing gas.

Walking out of the club and climbing into the limo should've been your first clue these guys weren't your average guys, but you obviously followed the man you seemed to be getting drunk off of. As he sat down, he grabbed your wrist with a sense of force but with a certain gentleness that made your heart swoon, he pulled you down to sit right next to him, pulling your legs to sit over his lap, your ass basically on half of his thigh. "You smoke baby?" He asked softly raising his eyebrows, you leaned your head to the side raising your eyebrows "If you do" You smirked, he just smirked chuckling a bit as he lit his joint he had stashed behind his ear, his friends smirking as they glanced over realizing Seung Hyun somehow pulled a girl who was either too drunk to know him or just didn't know him, which was rare.

You were both in your own world though, Seung Hyun inhaling before pulling your lips closer to his to blow the smoke into your mouth, you leaned forward to connect your lips but he quickly pulled away smirking, a smile on his face as he raised a finger wagging it towards you "Patience, baby" He whispered in the one tone that was starting to kill you. Pouting as you pulled away he chuckled leaning forward, leaving rough kisses down to your collarbone before biting your neck, you gasped running your hands through his hair, this man was just getting hotter and hotter the more he spoke.

Whenever you woke up the next morning, your entire lower half was sore, you had slight memories of the night before, especially whenever you saw a naked man asleep next to you. Slowly you tried to climb out of his bed without disturbing him, but as you started to pull on your dress you heard a deep breath and what sounded like a whine "leaving so soon, baby? How do those legs feel?" He asked smirking rolling onto his side to see you, you blushed as you stood up straighter turning around "M-my friend is probably worried a-and we had plans tonight" You stuttered "My number though?" You offered handing him your phone sweetly "Of course, but it's too cold to wear that, let me find you something, baby" He offered, throwing the blanket off of him, revealing his naked torso, a pair of boxers covering what still showed off as a big package. He walked over grasping your hand gently taking you into a giant closet, going through his shirts before pulling out a long sleeve shirt, a jacket, and some sweatpants. "That should be good enough to keep you warm, I'd hate for you to be shivering" he frowned, you looked up at him in awe "I hate sounding like one of those girls, but..You'll text me right?.." You asked placing your hands on his sides "Of course, baby, I gotta show tonight..but afterwards...how about you come back over" He smiled placing his hands on your hips swaying you gently, that should've been your second sign to put two and two together, especially because you and your friends were going to an award show tonight. "Deal.." You whispered, going to press your lips against his but you stopped yourself planting your feet to the floor. Seung Hyun chuckled shaking his hand before using his index and thumb to lift your head up "Come here, baby" He chuckled pressing his lips to yours, you held onto his arms as you leaned into the kiss, he pulled your hips closer smiling against your lips "Are you scared of me now, baby?" He asked teasingly, slowly pulling away from you "Not-uh" You whispered shaking your head "You're just...familiar" You mumbled "But I can't tell" You continued before shrugging, he sighed looking up to the clock frowning "I gotta get goin, baby...but I'll text you after my thing tonight..we can meet up again" He smiled, you nodded sadly as you pulled away from him starting to strip to change into the clothes he gave you "You're gonna kill me baby" You heard Seung Hyun groan from the doorway, you turned around blushing just in time to see him biting his lip before smacking the doorway "Saving that mental picture, because I like, I gotta go though, baby" He said quickly winking at you before disappearing out of the room to start getting ready.

As you were leaving the home, it all hit you, the voice, the body language, how familiar he sounded calling you baby, you just fucking slept with THE T.O.P and stayed the night in the same house as BigBang. As you opened the front door you were stopped by rushed footsteps and Seung Hyun's shouts "Y/n! Wait!" He shouted before coming to a stop in front of you, holding your hips in his hands, he loved the way they just perfectly fit into his hands at any point, from front or behind ;). "See you tonight, yea?" He asked, hopeful he'd get to see your beautiful smile and adorable demeanor again "Of course, just let me know when and where" You smiled kissing him one last time before leaving.

You spent the rest of the day trying to get your friends to believe who you slept with, but they just kept calling you delusional, as you walked into the giant arena, your friends squealed rushing to the barricades, you followed behind watching as everybody funneled in. It was packed, and for most of the show you were behind your friends, until your favorite song started to play, and you and your friend had switched spots, your friend and you both screaming as Knock Out started to play loudly over the speaker G-Dragon and T.O.P rushed out on stage again "Look! It's you're secret night lover, y/n!" Your friend teased, still thinking you were just delusional, until Seung Hyun turned, spotting you standing barricade to his show, so you did know who he was. He made his way over, squatting down, never skipping a beat with his rap as he made eye contact with you before motioning to security to bring you up to his room after the set. You almost fainted, not only did you fuck him and play it cool, but now he knew and still wanted to see you.

After the show ended you smiled looking at your friends "You guys! I'll meet you at the bar okay?" You smiled leaving them at the gates before aimlessly wandering around, trying to find the guard that was waiting for you before, as you continued looking, the venue started to empty, until it was just you in the halls, now turned around and lost. Never noticing Seung Hyun making his way to you, he just smiled to himself, of course you got lost, you were adorable. Making his way up behind you he grabbed your hips "Hi baby" He smirked "Didn't think I'd see you here" he said spinning you around to face him "I wanted to see you again" You frowned resting your hands on his chest "Was my performance not enough?" He asked with a fake pained face, you just shook your head wrapping your arms around him "So, why'd you want me to stay behind?" You asked looking up to him "I wanted to see you again" He repeated your reply from earlier before leading you back towards a small hall that was blocked off with multiple different dressing rooms.

"Baby" Seung Hyun called out, causing you to blush, you were just trying to introduce yourself to the others, but you were learning now the hotter older male was also clingy, but from what the others stated, he wasn't usually like this. Walking towards the bathroom door peeking in "yesss" you called back, smiling whenever you saw him peek out behind the foggy glass shower door, his light teal hair soaking wet slicked back from his face "Shower?" He asked, you were very very tempted to get in, but then you remembered how hard he was jumping on stage "Not-uh, you probably still stink" You protested, squealing as all the other saw was you dissapear behind the bathroom door as Seung Hyun grabbed your wrist pulling you into the bathroom. He stepped fully out of the shower towering over your small frame "That was rude" He scoffed, for a moment you thought he was serious until he smirked starting to peel his shirt off of you "Come on" He offered again before stepping back into the hot water.

You stepped in behind him once you finished stripping, this was your first chance to actually see him naked sober, and it was not a disappointment at all. "You're staringg" He teased pulling you closer by your hips, making you almost slip if it weren't for him catching you, you grasped his arms tightly looking at him terrified knowing it'd probably hurt like a bitch to fall. "I got you, baby" Seung Hyun whispered, ghosting his lips over your neck "You looked hot singing along to me" He whispered, you leaned into his touch, yea that water was warm, but he was somehow warmer. "You looked hot" You replied, feeling him squeeze your hips "Why didn't you say you knew me? us?" He asked, ghosting his teeth over your neck, you shivered under his touch "I didn't know who you were..until I left" You explained trailing your hand down his chest and stomach, feeling his stomach move as his breath hitched, his hand caught yours before it could go any further though "I like you" he stated, leaning away from you to be able to see your face "I like you too" You smiled cupping his cheek with your friend "Yes but do you like famous me...or me?" He asked, holding your hand close to his chest, over his heart "Be honest, y/n" He whispered, you nodded leaning closer to him "I like you, being around you just in the short time I have, it's been fun and I like being around you alot" You admitted, he just nodded kissing you softly, you leaned into him further, not wanting this moment to end

--

first Seung Hyun fic! What do we think? Part two? Leave it here? Feedback, lovelies, feedbacks.

[uncle-fruity]

I love the new year! It's my favorite holiday, and people who say that nothing changes or resolutions don't work or that everything is bad so there's no point in celebrating miss the point, imo. It's about getting through another year! It's about progressing and surviving and setting intentions for the new year. But too many people think of resolutions and new beginnings as things that have to be Big and Challenging for them to be meaningful, but that's really not how change works.

For the last several years, I've done what I call Resolution Bingo. I think of 24 things that range from Easily Doable to A Challenge and write them out on a bingo sheet. (Free space is always just Stay Alive.) The idea isn't to do all 24, but rather to try to get one or more bingos throughout the year.

I have never actually gotten a bingo (though I've come very close) but it doesn't matter. The point of Resolution Bingo is to put intention out there for the new year. I think of things I want to do or learn or get back into and I put them on my bingo sheet. Because of Resolution Bingo, I've gone to see more live shows than I used to. I've done more art projects & followed through with them. I've visited new places & had new adventures. I've learned new skills in cooking, needlework, and many other areas of interest. I have made both big and small positive steps for my life because of the resolutions I set at the beginning of the year.

So my advice is to think of resolutions as less of a major life change that you want to dive into -- take the stress off. You can make smaller resolutions that help with your bigger goals. I always tell people who decide they also want to do Resolution Bingo that they shouldn't put anything like, "Run daily/weekly," because as soon as you miss a day, it can demotivate you into stopping all together. Or, if you keep it going, you might feel guilty about marking it off on your bingo sheet at the end of the year, even if you still did a lot of work towards the goal. So, usually, I recommend setting realistic goals that get you going. Stuff like "run a 5k" or "run 3 different running trails" or you know... whatever is reasonable for you and has a tangible beginning & end. If you start working towards something fun or rewarding, you will still be doing the running you set out to do. Going for a daily run is good and all, but it's a slog if you don't know what you're working towards or if you don't allow yourself to rest on days that you really need rest.

My resolutions this year include things like getting a piercing, reading 50 academic papers, visiting all the libraries in my city, learning to place all the countries on a world map from memory, learning 3 new recipes, go somewhere new, complete 1 sewing project... Stuff that will take time and energy, but which will improve my life in ways I want to see it improve. If I don't set some goals -- even fun ones like going to a new museum -- I will just forget to do anything exciting or new & get lost in the depressing Grind of Life. And if you're lost in the depressing Grind of Life, remember to get outside and so anything at all that sounds appealing or productive or fun. It really helps to connect with the good things in life; makes you stronger and more stable in the long run.

I'm coming out as a new year's enjoyer. "Oh you will never stick to these goals" "nothing is really different between one day and the next" "why celebrate the bad years" because I want to!!! Because I love endings and beginnings and making lists!! I love the concept of starting the year by partying I love the drama of kissing someone at midnight I love the one time of the year when it is cold I love starting a new calendar and I love cheering for no reason

[shrimpybbq]

a timeline of rafe cameron and obx actress!reader’s character’s relationship (+ their real life one) pt 2

season 2: the yearning

season 2 is where rafe's obsession with iris really grows

he's constantly wondering about her, and how she feels about him. he's so convinced that she hates him and will never speak to him again, but he has this feeling that she won't report him

after john b and sarah 'died', iris spends more of her free time with the pogues. she comforts jj, and often seems to end up bailing him out of trouble

but they don't know that rafe's managed to get her phone number, and he keeps sending her messages trying to explain what happened on the tarmac - she doesn't respond

he even tries to go to her work, but she's not working that day

as rafe spirals, he genuinely feels she's the only one who would be able to understand him

he messages her before he goes to the bahamas

r: "hey, i'm gonna be gone for a few days, but i still really need to talk to you, ok?"

r: "please, i need to explain"

r: "just give me a chance to explain"

r: "please"

iris has him under his first initial in her phone, just in case any of the pogues happen to see her notifications. finally, she decides to respond, if only to understand more (and to get him to stop texting her)

i: "ok"

rafe literally shouts with joy seeing her response, no matter how dry it is. she's finally acknowledged him

while he's away, iris goes to see barry. her mom has been getting worse, and in a way, barry understands what she's going through. he's surprisingly good to talk to and the pair end up smoking together more than once, venting about their lives

in his deluded state, rafe truly thinks he will be able to win iris over with the gold. he's dreaming about paying for her mom's medical bills, winning her favour and looking after iris, living their happy little lives together forever

iris and rafe finally talk at tannyhill, rafe pleading that he was just trying to protect his dad. surprisingly, she listens intently, and lets out some small 'hmms' and 'mhms'. they get back to neutral ground, though she's still torn between what to do, but inside, she knows rafe shouldn't go to prison for a mistake

side note: ward oversees the pair talking, noting his son's wildly erratic hand gestures and decides to keep an eye on whatever is going on between the two

they're good for a few days, and then the pogues return to kildare with a very much alive sarah and john b, and everything changes once again

iris was so busy working that she hadn't had much to do with the gang, until jj texts her that john b had been arrested, and that rafe had tried to shoot them all - safe to say she's disappointed

oh but she's so mad when she hears of him trying to drown sarah, and she fully ices him out again

rafe kidnapping iris was not his finest idea, but she won’t listen to him after she hears and he’s just so mad. he’s got her in his car on the side of the road, just trying to get her to listen but she keeps telling him she “knows what he did”

rafe doesn't register what he's done until the sound of her sobs cut through his internal monologue, shamefully apologising and dropping her home, not even trying to say anything more

he’s just mean mean mean in this season bc he's hurt, but also he wants iris so bad and when she won’t even look at him, he can't control his actions

iris hears from the pogues that there is a warrant for his arrest and can't help feel concerned for him, only to be both shocked and concerned at the sight of ward cameron blowing himself up, her being the one to console sarah on the pier

everything is awkward between the pogues now, but it only gets worse once they see the texts on iris's phone following rafe's release from jail, him asking to see her...

they completely shut her out, refusing to even speak to her, and it only serves to push her further into rafe's (extremely willing) arms

he wants her to stay with him for the next few days, unknowingly about to bring her into all the drama with the cross

iris and rafe end up kissing for the first time just before he manages to get the cross for himself, and from then on, it's on between them - they're all over each other. think making out against the wall, in bed, on the couch

they both understand each other, able to see through the tough facade they put on and be vulnerable around each other. at their core, they’re just two hurt kids clinging on to each other

rafe literally thinks he will combust if she ever tries to leave him after he got a taste

unfortunately for him, he tries to get her to come along with him to guadeloupe, but she refuses

"Rafe, I can't leave my mom…. she can't survive without me," Iris whispered.

"No, no, c'mon, we can go together and I'll make sure she's got a carer and everything, the best medical treatment, ok? I just - I just need you with me for this," Rafe pleaded, desperation seeping through his tone.

"I'm sorry Rafe, but I can't."

and just like that, the beginnings of their relationship crumble, leaving rafe feeling betrayed, hurt and angry, spiralling as he lost something he barely had, and leaving iris all alone on kildare once the pogues get lost at sea, vulnerable and hurting

season 2: behind the scenes

heheheheehhehe

season 2 is where rafe and iris get closer, and the flow on effects are felt between drew and obx actress!reader

the kisses they share on screen are so steamy it has fans freaking out, especially at the quick glimpses they get of their tongues melding together. even people from outside the fandom start resharing videos of the kiss with hashtags like #wantthis #hot #menext

like i'm talking hands in hair and 'rafe' gripping her waist like he's about to be torn away, pulling away panting, red lips, etc.

drew and obx actress!reader had both spent time looking forward to the kiss, each secretly reminiscing on the kiss at jd's party. neither objected when they had to redo the take multiple times

the lingering touches shared between their characters are also picked up on, with rafe often touching iris and keeping her close by the end of the season

drew and obx actress!reader spent more time together this season working to develop their relationship after the directors told them more of the series plans, growing their bond even more

the attention on season 2 is greater this time around, with more fans and more people interested in the actors personal lives

obx actress!reader posts a few behind the scenes pictures, but nothing that really gets tongues wagging

it's a picture posted by madison bailey that does, with drew and obx actress!reader lying next to each other on a yacht, the pair side by side as they appear deep in conversation. fans go crazy from all angles, from the tiny bikini she was wearing to drew only in his swim trunks

the pics of them getting clingy and touchy later on in the evening don't ever make it out however….

the cast just sigh, having flashbacks to the 'friendly kisses' the pair always seem to share after a few drinks

in interviews, fans learn of obx actress!reader spending christmas at drew's and they just go wild, convinced the pair are in a secret relationship

with rafe and iris becoming more important characters in season 2, interviewers are lining up to film with the two of them alone, and for the few that manage, the views on the clip are sky high

it's literally just drew and obx actress!reader flirting and giggling the whole time with each other

obx actress!reader 100% simps for drew, complimenting his new look to the interviewer and saying he looks so handsome. drew can only blush and look down at his hands, all shy and cute

ok but lets talk about the bloopers!

it's the scene where they're in the car, rafe begging iris to listen to him after trying to drown sarah, and drew is waving his hands around wildly and accidentally hits her in the head. drew is instantly all over her, tenderly brushing her hair away from her head, checking in on her and apologising so much. it's quiet, but the microphones pick up on drew whispering "are you ok, baby? 'm so sorry"

but yet, they're not in a relationship??? and then drew starts filming hellraiser and people become convinced he's dating odessa??? and everyone is just so confused (including drew and obx actress!reader)

but then? there's pictures posted by paparazzi of drew and obx actress!reader together in new york, seeming far too close to be platonic and cuddling up against each other? queue even more confused fans

hehehe

Q: if i were to give obx actress!reader a love interest to spice things up and build some more angst, who would you want to see???

[kari-sims]

Tomiko Moriyama (she/they) as my entry for the Total Drama Sims season 3 by @jonquilyst!! (thanks for letting me participate <3)

also huge wall of slightly amusing text below the cut (you've been warned!) cause i was caffeinated and ended up having some fun with this ৻( •̀ ᗜ •́ ৻)

👩 Age: 14 🪐 Lives in: Strangerville 🐛 Goals in life: to open a bug museum 💖 Orientation: thinks girls are cute, but doesn't want to waste their short teen years chasing them around (that's what the 20's are for!) 🎶 Hidden talent: encyclopedic knowledge of kpop girl group's songs and dances 🥇 Honorable titles: -> 'Mighty Collector of the Fun Hats' -> 'Prestigious Ambassador' at the ''International Bug Diplomacy Federation'' (only actual human member, but it'll grow, just wait!) 👍Likes: iridescent beetles / cut rock hard candy / slippery mud you can draw on / putting googly eyes on random things 👎 Dislikes: homework / cleaning things that'll get dirty again / humans evil bug killing inventions (unless it's a laser shooting death ray gun for mosquitoes, cause yeah, even a bug loving girl hates those bastards!)

[RECORD 434, another sunny day in strange Strangerville]

🔴 ▶ •၊၊||၊|။||||။‌‌‌‌‌၊|•

(sound of someone clearing their throat, followed by what's obviously a kid trying to speak in an exaggerated deep voice)

Tomiko: "Tomiko is a girl who didn't need a home with walls or windows - the roof to her 'home' has always been the sky above." (pauses, mutters to themselves) Ooh that's a good one! Wait, people will think i live in the woods, no? Wouldn't that be the dream…

(moment of silence as Tomiko daydreams, then remembers she just started recording)

"Tomiko doesn't have many friends, because she was destined to be a free-spirited loner. With the exception of Clarisse, a girl who dreams ofbecoming a marine biologist. Clarisse was made fun of by strangers on a dumb internet show she went to one day, all because she wanted to win the money and go on a trip to Sulani. Now everyone calls her the 'Dolphin Girl'. After Tomiko decided to console her at lunch in school, both of them ended up bonding over their crazy obssession with nature. They've been inseparable friends ever since."

(another pause, followed by an audible sigh)

"Well, they were inseparable, until Tomiko moved away. Now Clarisse is being weird for no reason... anyways, where was i?

(forgets why they went on a Clarisse tangent and starts to fumble with their unorganized notes)

"Oh yes, destined to be a free-spirited loner, ya-da ya-da. Unfortunately, Tomiko was forced to live in a boring house made of bricks, with white furniture, and a mom who was always mad about her muddy boots on the carpet."

(voice shifts to mimic the mom's screech)

- I'm not gonna raise a savage wild child! Since you love dirt so much, go live with your bum of a father in that Strangerplace world, or whatever it's called.

"Best thing to ever happen to me!" (voice switches to normal accidentally, then goes back to the fake deep one) - I mean - best thing to ever happen to Tomiko! Even though her dad looks kinda weird lately, walking around aimlessly at night in search of his mother. Classic dad, being a weirdo. No idea how this man got married..."

- Dad, I told you grandma still lives in Willow Creek. Why do you think she's in the middle of the desert? Also, she wouldn't be caught dead wasting away her fabulous heels in this god-forsaken place.

"Tomiko pretends she doesn't see it, because now she can do whatever she wants, why complicate things? The only problem is, there isn't much to do in Strangerville with the infection rumors going on, and all the damn sus soldiers. Also, the taste of travelling for the first time has left her wanting to see more. Imagine all the bugs she could find?! But you need money for that, sooo… what to do, what to do…"

(voice returns to normal, a bit defensive)

"Okay, fine, I'm the one recording this… (sighs) I know what you're thinking - "just steal from your dad!". Seriously, who do you think I am? Anyways, I did something else instead. I heard there's this competition with other teens where you get to travel the world, and guess what? I signed up for it! Without my parents knowing, of course, but that is irrelevant. They won't even notice I'm gone, I fear. I just hope the organizers don't ask for their permission, because Clarisse was the one who knew how to fake signatures, but now she's hanging out with other kids at school, and thinks she's better than me."

(inhales, then proceeds to speak loudly at a wall, probably)

"Like... Nina? The enemy? Be so for real right now Clarisse! My life is just grand without you! I'll get to travel the world and educate people on how bugs are friends, and definitely NOT disgusting or too dangerous! Well, most times. I'll also prove that even if you're a weird bug loving kid like me, you can still have a chance at a game that requires you to make friends. It'll be eaaasy! In a few weeks I'll be like, Clarisse who? Hahah!"

(brief pause on their flex-rant, which is totally NOT a defense mechanism because she's hurt by them growing apart. They return, slightly worried)

"Do you think I can die in there? Cause gosh, let's hope not! Imagine going on an adventure of a lifetime and not being able to tell people about your heroic deeds... that'd be so lame! Anyways, I'll see you when I see you, whoever is listening to this… Tomi out!"

🟥 ▶ •ııııııııııııııııı•

[RECORD ENDS]

wow if you're still here, thanks for reading, you wonderful bean! here, have a cute snail

(´・ᴗ・)>~🐌

[theblacklewinsky]

Note: getting off these drafts. btw i heard kelvin's next 😮‍💨

DILEMMA. | Aaron Pierre.

Rich! Terry Richmond x Black! Female Reader.

Warnings: MDNI!! this story is 18+ with depictions but not limited to; sexual content ( fingering (fem receiving), penetrat!on (unprotected p in v, don't do that!), water sports, slapping/hitting, degradation), extreme language (cursing, use of b-word and others.) angst, guilt (you're a cheater, bitch) slight daddy kink if you squint. Not proofread. Terry referred to as Terrell.

Summary: in which an engaged woman and a rich man fall into a heavy affair, she's hesitant.

i be so in love with your girlfriend,

and she loves it too, and i love it too

when we rendezvous, we get comfortable.

"yeah, I miss you too," you cooed softly into the phone, your stomach churning at how honest your voice sounded despite your despicable actions.

You probably would've meant it if it were any other day, if you were any other place. Maybe if you were actually in London, like you told your fiancé you'd be before you landed in Toronto, you'd mean it. But every time you came back to this country—the city rather, you never meant it.

Your truths given to another man all at once, that you had no choice but to lie to the man you'd planned to spend the rest of your life with. You looked at the blinging engagement ring on your left hand and grimaced. You halfway listened to the man muttering on the other end of the phone and half of your attention, scoured through your head as you paced the small area of the hotel balcony you were standing on.

"Alright, babe," he hummed on the other line, "just wanted to make sure you landed alright, I love you."

You shuddered at how genuine he sounded. You loved him back too—but even you battled with that sentiment, you had another man making his way up to the hotel room in a country you weren't even supposed to be in.

Maybe if you'd forgiven him for all those mistakes he made over the course of your relationship—maybe if you went to counseling like your parents and friends advised you to you wouldn't be sneaking off on the love of your life.

"I love you too, baby," you feigned a smile, hoping that he could hear how genuine you tried to be, "can I call you back later? Everyone's checking in right now."

He subtly agreed with you on the other end, telling you to call him back later when you settled in before ending the call. Thank god for your job. Had you not been a flight attendant, this shit probably would've been a little harder to pull off.

That was the issue though, is that all this shit was getting harder to pull off. You loved your fiance, sure, but you were in love with Terrell. And that was never supposed to happen.

None of this was supposed to happen.

Six months ago you were supposed to go on a quick girls trip with your homegirls. Nowhere too far, but nowhere too close. So it was decided upon on Toronto. You'd been to Toronto countless times before on layovers and international flights, which is how you knew about how lively the city was. You and a few of your favorite coworkers leaving the hotel on the few nights you spent there, hitting up the clubs and after hour bars.

But you weren't supposed to meet Terry.

There you and your homegirls went, all strutting through Revival as if it wasn't the biggest club in Toronto. You'd been here once before, briefly with a few coworkers, but you still gawked how lovely it was. Looked straight out of a Vegas strip catalogue, and who owned that very busy, popular club? Terrell indeed.

Having drinks being sent to you and your homegirls section. And not just little shots—you had a bottle of Louis XIII sent to your table by a gorgeous bottle girl, you and your homegirls gaped at her. Who the fuck and how the fuck were yall about to pay for a $4,000 bottle of cognac? But she set your fears aside, claiming that it on the house, and was from the boss.

You and your homegirls bristled in happiness after that. Where the fuck was the boss on your first visit here? But nevertheless, you chalked it up to the people of Toronto being courteous to tourists. Up until you met Terrell on the dance floor. Oh, and you didn't fuck around when it came to that, you were two years fresh out of college, your party days were not behind you.

You thought he was simple club goer too, just finding you on the dance floor and making conversation, shouting in each other's ears over the music. He was handsome of course, eyes piercing, tall, full lips, dressed in nothing but designer. It wasn't until he asked you if you and homegirls liked the bottle of LOUIS XIII he sent to your section, that your slightly intoxicated mind put the dots together. You thanked him profusely, and told him how much all of you were enjoying his club.

And although he seemed happy to hear that, he seemed happier to know what exactly only you had planned after this. You'd been out the game so long you'd forgot what flirting looked like, but even you knew this was flirting. You told him about your Fiancé, and that seemed to slightly deter him (not really) but somehow you and your homegirls still managed to take turns hanging out the sunroof of his Mercedes Benz as he ripped through the streets of Toronto after the club closed.

And that was six months ago.

And within those six months you'd visited Toronto more times than you could remember, without coworkers, and without your homegirls, and simply with Terry.

At first it was fun. Harmless fun, you thought. Here you were, a man with far too much money fawning over you. You were far too loyal (at the time) to give him your number, and instead had given him your moderately sized instagram. There he damn near never missed a story, constant heart eyes, constant attention. Attention and flirting your man hadn't given to you since he courted you. That weakened you.

Before you knew it you were on constant first class flights from your city to Toronto, constant sex and low key outings were you and Terry's favorite pastimes when you did come for your brief visits.

But over the next few months you'd became invested. The little gifts had become more meaningful. Once just flowers, and cards and small designer items had become more than just materialistic and more like keepsakes. You cherished them. And although nothing had been concrete in your little affair, you assumed it was all through good fun. Here this man was, older, rich, single and fine—he could pick any single woman in Toronto, but he chose you. Engaged, committed. So maybe he knew he didn't have to commit?

You remembered the way he didn't even flinch when you told him you were engaged to be married, he simply just kept his lingering gaze on you and apologized. The conversation seemingly still seemed to flow, and he still asked you to ride with him afterward. You, not willing to leave your homegirls, and disrespect your engagement (at the time, slut) agreed, under the condition that your homegirls rode too.

Yet, here you were now. Riding him alone. And as bad as you wanted to cut it off, a part of you, bigger than you'd wanted to admit, didn't want to. You liked how free you felt with him, how natural and different things felt. How cherished you felt.

You hadn't even realized that he'd came in, finally, it was his hotel suite after all, paid and reserved for by him. But he was courteous enough to tell the Ritz Carlton front desk employees that his girlfriend would be arriving before him, securing you a keycard of your own.

"How long you got?"

You jumped at the sound of his voice shaking you from your own wandering mind, eyes flickering over to Terry leaning on the frame of the open sliding door. You understood his absence of pleasantries and greetings, y'all were way past that.



He looked so handsome though, per usual. He was always dressed to T's. Even now, black durag adorning his head, a black long sleeved Under Armor compression shirt enhanced his already perfect physique, a pair of matching compression pants under the mismatch Nike basketball shorts he wore. Or maybe he just made everything he wore look good.

"Two days," you said slowly hands gripping the railing of the balcony, averting your attention back out onto the view of downtown Toronto in front of you.

A small bout of silence stretched between the two of you, the air charged with a little bit of everything. Sexual tension, apprehension, passion—like always. But, your hesitance and distance added onto that, and Terry could feel that.

You sighed in contentment against him when he wrapped his broad arms around your waist, pressing your shorter frame into his from behind. His lips finding that sweet spot just behind your ear. "You good?" He mumbled against your skin, persisting kisses there.

You rested your head against his lowered shoulder, his face tucked into the crook of your neck as you hesitantly answered him, giving him a small "yes". To which he knew wasn't true.

And in his mind when you were with him, thinking was void. That's why he handled everything, from the travel, to the hotels, to the outings. He made sure he was your escape. He knew the wifely duties you had back in the states, cooking, cleaning, working—that's the shit your main man put you through. He didn't.

He could tell the night met you, you needed a well deserved break. You seemed tense from the moment he approached you, he literally watched it all melt away during the duration of your conversation, you were already pretty, too pretty. But you looked even prettier when you were relaxed. So, that's what he strived to see.

"What you thinkin' about, mama?" He hummed against your already hot flesh. "You know I don't condone that shit."

You laughed at how serious he sounded, prompting him to chuckle right behind you. You raised your shoulder from his head, craning your head up at his now lifted frame behind yours with furrowed brows, "you don't condone that? Me thinking?"

"You know that," he casually responded, "why you think I handle everything? You do that shit back home with that nigga. Here, I don't need all that." He mumbled before using his opposing hand to tap lightly against your temple, softly kissing your lips.

And that was the problem. Him handling everything. Not wanting you to think and enjoy your time together. That's what made you feel free, that's what had you feeling all types of feelings about him. But you couldn't voice that, just staring back up at him with that dazed stare you gave him every time he kissed you.

You didn't speak until he led you back into the spacious suite, back to the bedroom where the huge king bed was that you belly flopped on when you first arrived. You didn't speak until he started removing the Swarvorski pumps he'd bought you on your last visit, grasping your left ankle and lifting it up to his lips, pressing summer kisses up your calves. You teeth sinker into your bottom lip, watching him as he watched you. Everything else melted away for a moment. Just a moment though.

"Terrell," you huffed as your thoughts overcrowded your mind again, jerking your leg away from his lips, though it still remained secure in his grasp, "this is wrong." If only your fiancé hadn't called and ruined the very sexy mood you were in, you could do this. You would've done this.

Terry recoiled at the reference of his real name with you, and the fact that you were back with this again. He hadn't heard those three words up until the third month, and here you hear three months later singing the same tune again. He sat your leg down gently, getting up from his kneeled position on the floor. "Nah, don't start that," he firmly replied joining you on the bed in one swift motion. Pressing his lips against your non-responsive ones, trailing his kisses over to your cheek, jawline and then finally your neck before you pushed away from him.

"I'm serious," you muttered quietly, folding your arms over your chest, "I can't keep doing this to my fiancé, I'm about to get married in a few months. This shit is wrong, and you know that." You gave him a side glance, chewing anxiously on your bottom lip.

Terry sighed, his eyes on you in a near blank stare. This shit was tuning him out. Where was all this shit coming from again? "You came all the way out here to tell me that? What you sayin'?" He asked you, brows slightly furrowed as he looked over your solemn side profile.

You were silent for a moment, mind racing. You dropped your arms from their folded position, fiddling with your fingers and wringing them out in nervous jitters. "We can't do this...any more." You said slowly. You weren't strong enough to do this three months ago, but maybe now? Terry's brows now no longer furrowed, he looked at you with now a completely blank stare, almost like your words weren't toward him. He nodded slowly as you continued though. "But that doesn't mean that I don't wanna see you anymore—we can still be friends, I can still come see you sometimes." You foolishly said.

"Yeah?" Terry asked eyes trailing over your seated figure, hungrily. His hand didn't hesitate to retreat to your thigh, rubbing the thin material of your dress up your thighs. "We can be friends?"

Your eyes dropped from his gaze, to his wandering hands. Skin feeling hot all over again, you resisted the urge to close your eyes, not trusting yourself to speak you nodded slowly. Silly girl, really.

"Yeah?" He asked you once again, brow raising in mock surprise. "You sound so sure, mama. How can we be friends and I can't even keep my hands off of you?" His hands trailing up, up, till they got to the waistband of your pretty images, his long digits slipping inside.

You huffed as soon as his middle finger started circling your hard clit, eyes fluttering closed as you fought to give him a response in return, "you'll learn," you huffed through his subtle, teasing on your clit.

He laughed in response to your statement, "you know that shit ain't true. Don't even know why you fightin' this shit to be honest," he coyly responded, finger sliding up and down slowly from the hood of your clit down to your entrance before slowly slipping his finger inside of you, feeling how snug you felt around him. He mocked your moan of pleasure, watching as your head fell against his shoulder, a small whimper slipping past your lips.

"It's wrong, can't do this, you 'bout to get married," he repeated your phrases back to him, tone patronizing, "but this pussy so wet for me," he mumbled pressing a kiss to your forehead, resting his lips there before slipping another finger in, eyes darting between your expression and his hand in your panties.

Fingers curling and pushing so deliciously deep, your brows furrowed as you gasped sharply, a soft pretty moan following right after. Terry persisted his soft kisses against your forehead as he continued his assault with his fingers, pace picking up ever so slightly, sounds of your sticky arousal coating his fingers filled the spacious bedroom. You nodded your head at the immense pleasure you felt, soft gasps slipping past your lips with every thrust, "yes, yes, yesss," you chanted to nothing in particular, eyes squeezed shut as your hands instinctively wrapping around his working wrist.

His free hand lazily knocking them away, almost as if you were disturbing him. You whined, feeling his fingers increase in speed, the sound of nothing but your arousal filling your ears as your moans and chanting became silenced behind your quickly approaching orgasm.

Terry took note of your shallow breathing, frozen figure and agape mouth, pressing another soft kiss to your forehead, "there we go," he mumbled against your skin, "cum. Cum for me," he rushed out, fingers slipping out of you to rub in rapid, vigorous circles against your clit. Juices spurting out of you seemingly on command. "Gimme all that shit, stop playin' wimme." He hummed grabbing your slackened jaw, fingers still effortlessly working against you, juices still squirting out of you wildly. Capturing the moans you were finally able to let out right into his mouth.

He didn't stop kissing you, or his lewd actions with his finger until he was sure you had finally rode out your orgasm, trembling and all. He slipped his hand out of your panties, fingers dripping in your essence as you both watched. "Look at that," he mumbled, "came so fuckin' hard." He said before rubbing his fingers against your parted, swollen lips, before slipping them inside your wet mouth. Fingers fucking your wet mouth and throat as he watched, teeth sunken into his bottom lip looking at you with hungry eyes at you tasting yourself.

He slipped his fingers out of your mouth all at once, immediately slapping them against the seat of your nose soaked panties. "Can't make you do that if we just friends."

You hadn't got a chance tip properly take off any of your clothes. He didn't give you a chance. Your dress pushed up above your exposed titties, bra hanging lazily off of one arm, panties pushed to the side. He was so hungry to ravage you, almost like if he'd given you a chance to undress you could change your mind. You were a lost cause as soon as he got you to that bed tbh.

"Stop playin' wimme," he looked up at you, face stern, a stern look in his eyes, hand slapping against your left ass cheek with a hard force, leaving a lasting sting behind you would've cried at hadn't you been so turned on, a needy moan leaving your lips as you slumped against him, "ride that dick right."

You whimpered as he pushed you back, your hands grasping both of his shoulders as you stabilized yourself on the tips of your toes before lifting and slowly lowering yourself onto him, you didn't dare take all of him, what you were taking was just enough, hitting that spot that you liked so much. You kept this up for as long as you could, avoiding his impatient glare.

"Yeah, you playin' with that dick," he mumbled irritancy clear in his tone, both hands gripping either sides of your fleshy hips forcing you down onto him, the stretch coming with that perfect sting, the force of him filling you hurt so good, a guttural moan erupted from you, eyes glazing over as you stared down at him with parted lips, "you know who you with, ride that shit how I like."

The casualty in his tone was abstract to the dirty things he was saying to you, that alone had you leaking all over him. Your whimpers and moans fell into synchronization with the creaking bed, squelching of your pussy and your skin slapping together as you took all of him. Terry's grunts and groans matching yours, his eyes averting back and forth between your pleasurably contorted expressions to where you met at the base of his dick. You felt your self started to slink against his upright figure, arms wrapping around his neck as you buried your face in his neck muffling your audible moans as you continued your rushed pace.

But he had to see you. Had to watch all the pretty faces you made when he made you take him deep like this. Both his hands grasped your torso, lightly pushing you away from him, halting your movements causing him to furrow his brows. "I ain't say stop, keep ridin' that dick," he affirmed, sending another sharp slap to your ass. You whined at the sting, starting to bounce again, ignoring the aching in your calves. Him filling you up once again making your mind a fuzzy mess.

"Just like that," he groaned, looking up at you leaning forward to catch one of your pierced mounds into his mouth, lips latching on softly, the sight making you huff through a moan your own eyes fluttering closed as you continued riding him. He pulled back with a loud pop, eyes watching you intently. "Look at you, fuckin' yourself on my dick like this. But you done with me, yeah?" He asked voice low and uneven as you sunk yourself down to his sticky base where you met, a shallow breath slipping past your parted lips. "You done with me?" He asked a bit louder, his eyes boring into your soft ones.

You could barely answer, mind fuzzy as you fucked your self into an empty oblivion. Eyes closing and then promptly opening, only to roll back. His hand grabbed your jaw roughly, making your brown eyes flutter open, a series of heavy breaths slipping past your lips as you tried to focus on his gaze. "Say the wrong thing and watch I don't let you cum on this dick, you heard me."

"I'm not done," you managed to slur out, voice small and breathy as your hands wrapping around his wrist, for leverage at your now burning knees.

Your quiet response obviously not satisfactory to Terry. "You wanna cum on this dick?" He asked you, still holding onto your slackened jaw.

"Yesss!"

"So let me hear you say that shit. You done with me?" He repeated more firmly.

"Im not done, daddy!" You cried out shaking your head in his grasp vigorously, the tears burning behind your now shut eyes threatening to spill over as you continued trying to fight off your quickly approaching orgasm.

"I know," he cooed, pressing open mouthed kisses all over chest, "I know, baby. You love fuckin' this dick don't you?" He muttered against your skin. Hand dropping from your jaw to join his other in wandering all over your body. You felt so hot, everywhere. Everything felt so good and like too much all at once.

"Yessss!"

"Yeah you do," he hummed through a moan of his own, "keep fuckin' me just like that. Such a nasty lil bitch, keep goin," he groaned.

You opened your tear filled eyes, soft and unfocused as you gazed down at him almost pathetically, "wanna cum daddy. wanna cum so bad," you whimpered.

"m' almost there, baby," he rushed out, eyes focused on the mess you were currently making on him, breathing ragged, "keep goin."

You could tell exactly how close he was when he started thrusting into you, luckily for you anyways, your knees were burning, calves aching, you didn't know how much longer you could've kept up.

"Oh my god," you repeated over and over through a series of heavy breaths and moans, your eyes low, vision blurred as tears ran down your soaked cheeks, "I'm gonna cum! Daddy im gonna—"

"Cum," he breathlessly mumbled, lips parted, "cum on my dick. Let me cum in you, mama."

"Cum in me daddy!" You rushed out, mind completely fuzzy and blank. "I'm cumming! I'm cumming!" You frantically announced, slouching against Terry's broad figure as he continued his sloppy, hard thrusts groaning and grunting as he filled your sensitive pussy with his warm cum. Your ears muffling the sounds of him announcing his orgasm, late of course.

Soft kisses covered your neck and chest as you came down from your orgasm, his strokes now slow and relaxed. But as you came back down you noticed your horrible mistake.

"Cum in me daddy!" Your words echoed in your now stable mind. Canada had to sell plan B's, surely. Right?

Hope you enjoyed <3

tag list: @avoidthings @megamindsecretlair @nickidub718 @keehendrixx @planetblaque @blowmymbackout @b2hotty @partypoison00 @grooveoftiro @nahimjustfeelingit-writes @dxddykenn @motheroffae @kaylaahisthebestest- - @hello-therree @simplyzeeka

[mandalhoerian]

i gotta reblog this because this is 100% the case!!!! rafayel uses pain in life that resonates with his own!

i want to dial it down and ground it in his objective in life for this particular reading though, and say another facet/layer to this is that the love&relationship he has with mc is interfering with his revenge by affecting the tool he uses for it (art) and eclipsing all the pain he's feeling and should be feeling, not to mention should actively be seeking out. mc is soothing those feelings down and basically acting as balm to his injury, shifting the perspective with which he looks at live by just existing by his side. suddenly it's not "an ocean drying up in the desert" but "how surprising it is that an ocean exists in the desert" -- when it should be the former that he has to focus on.

and he realizes he isn't suffering as much and isn't as miserable as he was before. he has something else in his life other than this mission. he has a little bubble of happiness. these two sides of his life are clashing. It's not only pain and suffering and mourning and anger, and it hasn't been for a while now that he's been with mc. he just comes to terms with it at the end of intertidal zone after his "pain reserves" dry up and "he can't find supplements", and he has to confront why head on.

but he's so wired for pain that he expects love will bring it to him one day (as it has before, he's been burned by mc), but he still wants it anyway and mc shoots it down thankfully. i just want to put him in a jar and shake it 😭

Repost because tumblr's tags were broken yesterday and it ate my post up 😞 Spoilers and translation notes for Rafayel's intertidal zone & analysis because it kinda floored me, I was just as a blank page as he was throughout this. I had to watch it like 5 times to understand what the story was saying and dig into chinese and japanese versions of this to piece together what was really happening. It may be my idiot brain not getting it and maybe it was like the easiest thing to understand for you but. Yeah. I may be just dumb LMFAO AND!!!! There's also a theory of mine into how Rafayel is actually able to read mc's mind/wishes through their lemurian bond, so stay tuned for that I guess

EDIT: correcting some transcriptions of chinese characters and the translations. sorry about that! google couldn't transcribe it correctly. for clarity's sake i will also include original screenshots. please tell me if anything is wrong!

EDIT 2: Check out part 2 to this as well for stuff I missed!

EDIT 3: An Abysswalker connection I found

EDIT 4: Debunking the myths of non-consent & Rafayel hurting MC in the spicy scene

So Rafayel’s whole deal in this memory, I believe, is dependency. Like, too much intensity, too much need, too much fear -- about scaring her off, about what he sees himself possibly becoming in the future, overall just being too reliant on mc and getting scared by it.

Let's begin with this massive fear of being a taker, not just in the “I’m stealing someone’s fries” way, but in this existential, soul-deep kind of way where he’s terrified of turning everything he loves into something he exploits out of demand for his art. And yeah, it’s sad when you first hear him say it, but it’s also really interesting when you look at how this all ties into his relationship with MC and his inspiration source drying up because of her.

Before Rafayel became an artist, he looked at the world in this super pure, wholesome way. Sceneries and nature were just there, things to admire and feel awe over without needing to do anything about it. Like, imagine standing at the edge of a desert, looking at a sea that’s drying up. Sure, it’s tragic, but it’s also kind of beautiful in a raw, heartbreaking way. That’s how Rafayel saw things, he could appreciate them without feeling like he had to do anything.

But then Rafayel started creating, and suddenly, sceneries weren’t just sceneries anymore. They became inspiration. He wasn’t just admiring beauty, he was extracting something from it, its meaning, its pain, its soul, to turn into art for other people. And that made him feel all kinds of icky, because now he wasn’t just looking at the drying sea. He was taking from it. Just as he's using his people's pain in his art as well, that's also a thing.

Now let’s talk about MC. Rafayel loves her like he used to love those sceneries,,, in this pure, untainted way. There's a parallel here. But here’s the kicker, he’s not the same guy who can just admire something and leave it untouched anymore.

And suddenly, this is no longer only about losing inspiration for him.

This happens after he and MC get together, and it’s like all the pain and anguish that used to fuel his creativity just.. ... dries up. He can’t find that spark anymore because now his life is surrounded by love instead of suffering. In fact, his inspiration starts coming from her and it's starting to clash with how he makes art. In the phone call, he seeks her out and says he needs her so bad and she only needs to talk to help him out. This is the first wink wink nod nod of the story.

So what does Rafayel do? He goes on this big, dramatic trip to "find inspiration" (or at least his muse), but it’s not just about his art. He’s not just looking for inspiration, he’s trying to figure out how to be less dependent on her and becoming increasingly more restless over this. The temparature and physical discomfort is making things worse, he's anxiously overthinking, and imagine trying to fight this and the longest art block as of late off when all you want to do is indulge in this special person and be comforted like a lap cat all day every day.

He understands that if he lets himself indulge without restraint, one day his love for mc will turn into pure need. He’ll become more and more greedy, and he doesn’t want that and is afraid of being abandoned because of that growing neediness and dependency.

This is in relation to his art, because as @/dat-silvers-girl put in the comments, he's struggling with "the genuine fear of not being able to enjoy anything in life because all you're thinking about how to use it (as an artist)" . what if he starts doing this to her? to their love and relationship? take from her, and become someone who only takes in every area of life -- like someone who only exploits things by extracting what he feels about them to use it for his art. he's afraid of that, he doesn't like that and possibly doesn't like himself who does it. so why should she? she would leave him for sure, in his head, that's a solid reason to.

The first time around he brings up his anxiety about MC leaving him out of the inner realization of his dependency, the possibility of just what he can become, and fear of abandonment. she effortlessly soothes his worries. It's heavily implied they did it afterwards and after hearing "her life has already been consumed by him" he tweaked out a little bit and his "obsession" seeped through.

After it fades to black, he says ほら……僕もとっくに……君に侵食されてしまっているんだ…… which means "See... I've already been completely consumed by you too" in Japanese instead of the life being made a chaotic mess localization. While I think MC's line was jokey and lighthearted, I don't think this man is joking at all. Rafayel didn't say his life was consumed by her as well, he said HE was consumed. Ouh.

This took the edge off from him for a while but they hadn't gotten to the root of the problem yet, so he was back to square one after the memorial hall, because remember, he's trying to find inspiration as an act of making this dependency of his better. Pain and suffering are all around him here, which his inspiration feeds off of. The dried up ocean he could hear weakening, the skeleton of the whale, the burden of his people and homeland more prominent than before. And what does MC do? Tear through the perspective of pain and introduce a hopeful alternative, "Isn't it a surprise to see an ocean in the middle of the desert?"

This is a place that gave Rafayel the height of helplessness and suffering when he visited by himself before despite momentarily being hopeful after the locals told him such a place existed. But now, she was there to comfort him through his loneliness and pain, hug him, and give him hope yet again. He brings up how he wanted to come here with the most important person to him when he was still hopeful about it before consumed by the pain of it all, and that wish has been granted. That moment has to be so powerful for Rafayel. Literally light at the end of the tunnel.

It had me reeling that he just sat in the car after all that, staring at her for god knows how long until she woke up. He was probably overthinking again, but my interpretation that it was heavily emotional for him (it could have meant so little for MC but the world for him, she doesn't even know) and he wanted to be in that moment with her, just feel and look without restraint. Indulge a little. (I can just imagine him going just a little bit more, I'll go after she wakes up.) And like. His eyes are shining in the darkness is the description here. Perhaps he was feeling so much here. So much love. So much happiness. And he's about to go in for a kiss (heavy breathing and everything) after that, but holds himself back and actively has to pry himself away. He's feeling the neediness again.

That’s why he makes an effort to actively wean himself off and says he'll be okay on his own. What he says to her after MC is like "spoiling him" being all "hey you're sick maybe don't go? or let's go together?" (which is NOT helping Rafayel at all) is even more meaningful in Japanese and I didn't know why they left out this context, but the rearranged line would be "Do you want me to become a sea creature beached on the sand after the sea recedes, unable to breathe on my own ever again?"

Yeah. YEAH. This is about dependency. (He's saying don't coddle me I'll literally become that wolf tearing his shirt meme 😭)

So of course his stubbornness and anxiety force him to do things without MC and distance himself, he can do it. He’s determined to prove to himself that he can endure it on his own.

I also feel like part of the reason he insisted on going to the salon alone is that he’s still worried mc might come to dislike the version of him who's someone he's so sure she will leave, who isn't perfect and he hides behind the persona he's put up just for her. If he truly becomes addicted to her and shows her everything/his true self, and she ends up leaving him, it would completely break him. He's trying to be like "im so normal about her haha" but he's so not normal about her at all. He's literally obsessed I feel like, and perhaps this is him fighting it knowing it's not healthy.

and OOOH about why he ends up coming back from the salon all hot and bothered.

I have strong context that she flicked the bean in there after he left her high and dry in the car ("hot water washes away the stickiness from my body and his stifled breaths still echo in my ears, enveloping me along with the steam in the bathroom. The warmth from his fingertips lingers in the places where he touched me..." is the english. however, in chinese, it goes "熱水洗去身上的黏膩，壓抑的喘息迴盪在我耳畔，和浴室裡氤氳的水氣一起包裹著我." stating "the suppressed breathing" -- which doesn't have any possessive adjectives when I translated it on google and later explicitly asked chatgpt if it had any his/my adjectives involved, just to be sure. it said no but i'd like it if a real chinese speaking person could give their input on this !!! PLEASE DONT LEAVE ME WITH CHATGPT

so um. if the context is in fact the case that he heard her masturbating to him, the intensity with which he attacked her would be normal, I think 😭

I have belief that MC unconsciously shatters his "training himself to be without her" determination through their bond. She just keeps thinking about him the entire time. about him reading her thoughts, though. we still don't know all about the lemurian bond they share. I’d say it grants him some sort of mind/heart reading ability or connects their minds together (when she was thinking about whether she should hug him, he answered “yes”).

At the salon, I imagine Rafayel was already thinking about her like crazy. Then he realized, or perhaps, "heard" she was still worrying about him and thinking of him (as much he thought about her) and decided to go back. Rafayel probably felt that suppressing himself was only making her more anxious and unsettled. She's thinking all about him, unconsciously calling to him to come to her, she didn't want to let him go at all, wanted to go with him, etc...

but even if it was his own decision and no mind reading was involved... uh. If you ask me. He did quite literally hear her after coming back. That's also something that might make him think she wants him as much as he wants her, which made his self-restraint utterly meaningless from the start.

Disregarding this theory of mine proven wrong until a Chinese speaker helps me out here, MC returned to Rafayel's room. A translation omission happened here from what I saw. There are no possessive adjectives in the Chinese text about the room she returns to, and the Japanese one states she returned to the guest room (doesn't specify which one. She was also able to enter Rafayel's room without needing to knock before.)

so uh. she went into rafayel's room y'all. the line "this is my room, you're the one who walked in here" MAKES SO MUCH MORE SENSE. (SO LIKE. NOT ONLY DID SHE GO INTO HIS ROOM, SHE FLICKED THE BEAN THERE AND HE POSSIBLY HEARD IT. SHE'S MORE OF A FREAK THAN HE IS, I UNDERSTAND WHY HE LET GO AFTER THAT LMFAO)

I don't put it past him to get worked up after he finds her in his room post-bath even without my theory lmfao (idk why they put her in a dress when she should be in a bathrobe or something 😭)

His conclusion at the end of this memory that "he finds inspiration in pain and the art of creation is a part of his life. mc made him realize love and art are so alike. even if they don't complete him but burn him instead he wants them (love and art) with every fiber of his being" and MC says she doesn't like that, rightfully so.

So like. There's SO MUCH to unpack in here.

When Rafayel says he finds inspiration in pain and that creation is a part of his life, he’s admitting something raw and essential about himself: pain isn’t just a byproduct of his art, it’s intrinsic to it. For Rafayel, pain and art are intertwined in a way that’s almost inseparable. It’s like his muse isn’t just beauty, but beauty that hurts.

But then he takes this further by connecting art to love. He’s realized that both art and love demand the same from him: vulnerability, passion, and sometimes suffering. They don’t necessarily complete him (he’s not romanticizing them as salvation), but they burn him, wear him down, consume him (coincidentally, this is something he said to MC in the JP dub of this memory, that she consumes him), but also give him life. And for Rafayel, that’s the crux, even if they burn him, he wants them with every fiber of his being.

This is such a Rafayel thing to say. It’s dramatic, it’s tortured, but it’s also deeply SUBTLE. He doesn't spell all of these out, mind you, I got a headache trying to understand him. Or I'm just slow, I don't know. It shows how much he values creation and connection, even if they come at a cost.

MC, on the other hand, challenges this perspective. When she says she doesn’t like that he views love and art as things that burn him, she’s pushing back against the idea that suffering is a necessary part of creation, or love. MC doesn’t want Rafayel to see their relationship as something that requires him to hurt. She’s telling him, “You don’t have to destroy yourself to love me.”

When MC says, “You’ll never have to burn for me,” she’s giving Rafayel an alternative to his destructive mindset. She’s saying that love doesn’t have to hurt, that their relationship can exist without him sacrificing himself on the altar of passion. It’s a refusal to let Rafayel romanticize pain as the price of love.

And I love that Rafayel goes, "Will you help me look for other parts in life outside of pain?" in response. This is NOT about art or inspiration anymore, and the way the dialogue is written is just AUGH. Again I had to rewatch this over and over again for the nuances and subtext.

I love MC's response, she knew exactly what to say. “I’ll always be the one who walks along the shore with you. Of course, diving into the sea bed is fine too. If it can snow in the desert, there will be a day when the ocean returns.”

MC’s response is layered with metaphors, but at its core, it’s about unwavering support and hope::

Walking along the shore: This represents safety and companionship. MC is saying she’ll be with Rafayel in the calm, in the moments where they’re just observing life without diving into its depths. She’ll be his steady presence, his grounding force.

Diving into the sea bed: This is an acknowledgment that life and love sometimes require going deeper and they may go through hardships, into the unknown, the murky, the challenging. MC isn’t afraid of this, she’s willing to go there with him too.

Snow in the desert and the ocean’s return: This is a symbol of hope and transformation beyond being a nod to The Sea of Golden Sand. Snow in the desert seems impossible, just like the idea of Rafayel finding inspiration outside of pain might feel impossible to him. But MC believes in the extraordinary, in change, and in the possibility that beauty and creation can exist outside of suffering.

Her words are a promise: she’s willing to stand by him, to face the unknown together, and to hold onto the belief that a new way of seeing the world is possible.

And Rafayel LOWKEY PROPOSES IN RETURN.

By saying “let’s watch the sea together,” he’s accepting MC’s offer of companionship and hope in the long run. He’s recognizing that life doesn’t have to be about diving into the depths alone, it can be about sharing the experience with someone else, even if it’s just standing on the shore and watching.

“Every sea”: This phrase is key. Rafayel isn’t just committing to one kind of life or one kind of inspiration, he’s opening himself up to all possibilities. Watching every sea means embracing all facets of life, whether they’re calm or turbulent, painful or beautiful. It’s a marriage proposal declaration that he’s ready to explore the world beyond pain, with MC by his side.

So. I love that his inspiration returns after his freak is accepted by MC because he literally feels the acceptance through the bond.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. This memory DRAINED me. They were just supposed to bang what the fuck happened. Why did I have to go treasure hunting to find what was going on in this card. anyway...

[australet789]

Some assholes on Instagram saying that Epic fans are "gaslighting" themselves about Odysseus being faithful to Penelope because of the Circe part and being pretentious about it and how we are stupid for considering The Odyssey romantic

Motherfucker

1. The Odyssey is an epic poem we all fucking know that? That it's a tragedy, technically comedy (comedy in ancient literature used to mean "happy ending", not funny stuff)

2. The Circe bit can be interpreted in different ways, as if it was fully consensual or not or just a transaction. There was still a difference in power dynamics, which was 100% mentioned by Calypso in the beginning, but if you choose to ignore that part if the same as saying some of Zeus' kids were ok to be conceived because the women agreeded to what A GOD wanted.

3. Obviously Epic!Odysseus is differente from Homer!Odysseus, but trying to say Homer! Odysseus is a horrible person that fully wanted to cheat on Penelope just because you want to defend ALEXANDER HAMILTON, i have bad news about you.

4. "The crew had to beg to go back!" I read the Odyssey too. As a child and a few days ago. They stayed on Circe's island to rest so Odysseus job as a captain was literally wait until his crew told him they were ready to leave, specially after what they have lived. Odysseus didnt force anyone to stay in that island, when the crew went "oh, sir, we miss our families, please lets go back now, yes?" Odysseus immediately said "ok". It literally felt like a father waiting for the kids to stop playing in the playground.

5. Homer!Odysseus is not perfect, at all (man killed his disloyal maids because he didnt want to deal with shit anymore, even if they also were coerced/raped by the suitors), but come with a better gotcha than Circe. You are just fixiated on the Telegony and it shows.

6. Idk what to tell you, but if you think renouncing a life with two inmortal godesses (one of whom offered you immortality), traveling for 10 years defying a God's rage, killing 108 men who wanted to marry your wife (and ruined your house), almost killed yourself when said wife rejected you only for her to go "haha i was just testing you, silly :)", have your literally marriage have a word created for you two specifically is not romantic... Idk go read Bridgerton

[f1cflcfic]

The Prophecy (SMAU ft. Lando Norris)

pairing: lando norris x singer!reader (y/n)

summary: what happens after the break-up that noone saw coming? as Y/N L/N gears up to release her next album, each song reveals a little bit of the past, present and future of her relationship with Lando Norris. Inspired by a curated playlist built around "The Prophecy". note: this is RPF and is obviously in no way, shape, or form reflective of real persons. Also, this story is angsty with a happy ending - it does not contain any smut or suggestive themes. [A/N: This is my first SMAU and hooooooly shit did I totally underestimate how much work it is, and how things work within Tumblr to make it look alright. If you have any tips, let me know lol. I had to split it up in pieces, but i've got all the content written out already, so will be updated soon with the next part!]

♥･*:.｡ ｡.:*･ﾟ♡･*:.｡ ｡.:*･ﾟ♥

December, 2025

February, 2026

[Excerpt from red carpet interview at the Grammy's with Y/N]

How are you feeling tonight? You're up for 3 awards, one of them Album of the Year for All I Ever Needed - that's huge!

"It's so overwhelming, to be honest."

Even when you've gone through this experience before? This is your fourth time attending, second time as nominee.

"Yeah, maybe even more so! It's a great chance to hang out with friends and meet new people, but it's also really prestigious still. Being nominated - I try to act like it doesn't matter, because awards always involve politics too - but at the end of the day, you do want it."

And who're you most looking forward to seeing tonight?

"Honestly? I came alone tonight, so I can't wait to find Sabrina [Carpenter] and Jade. I'm gonna need my girls."

Your friend Miley is also up for an award tonight in the same category, what's that like?

"Ha, if the Grammy's do the right thing tonight she'll win it - I know I voted for her!"

You'll also be performing one of your songs - Ruin My Life, can you tell us a bit about what to expect?

"I really wanted this to be visually interesting, but it took me a while to get the right concept for it. I think it's because to me this album and song already feel sort of far removed, and lived in? I'm in a different phase of my life right now, so I had to find a new way to still connet to it. I was really grateful to work with a great art director to bring a different version to the stage."

March, 2026

July, 2026

[SkyNews excerpt]

Lando Norris wins Silverstone GP, dedicates his 20th podium win to his family

The man of the hour is none other than Lando Norris, who’s just gone on to claim his 20th victory at his home race. You’re reading that right, his home race! While he still owns his apartment in Monaco, Norris revealed today that he’s been living back in England for the past few months. “I just wasn’t in the right headspace anymore and wanted to live closer to my family. Especially now that my brother’s kids are growing up, I just like knowing I could drive over – rather than having to fly across countries.”

Speaking on the importance of his family being present, Norris shared that it means everything to him. “In this sport you need to have skill, talent, trust and investment from your team, but also you need that stable sense of safety from the people you love. If your mindset isn’t there, you can’t be competitive.”

Norris has been vocal about mental health in the past, and has advocated for more access to mental healthcare facilities and professionals across motorsport.

“Especially in tougher years where there’s just a lot of noise and turmoil, it’s nice to have a professional coach you to mental fitness as well.”

It was the only notable reference to Norris’ private life, which ended on a low note last year after splitting from long-time girlfriend y/n l/n. The two were originally thought to have had an amicable split, but recent reports hint at a different story, with Norris unfollowing his ex and her friends unfollowing him in return.

August, 2026

September, 2026

♥･*:.｡ ｡.:*･ﾟ♡･*:.｡ ｡.:*･ﾟ♥

Part II can be read here! likes, comments, reblogs are always very much appreciated ♥

[siddyyyyyyyy]

Comfort

Damian Wayne x Batsis!Reader

wc: 1.3 K summary: your younger brother tries to comfort you when you're sick. warnings: none, fluff, platonic, no y/n used a/n: I'm doing this because i dont want to live, so here you go. (divider)

It started with a sore throat after patrol. Nothing too scary and you made yourself a warm tea to make it go away before going to sleep. But it was bold of you to assume that it won't get worse overnight. Tea isn't medicine after all.

It started to get worse in school, the next morning. You noticed the tremors going through your body and light sweat covering your skin as you went through each period, but you didn't want to skip the day just because of that. So, you powered through, even when you felt like a walking zombie by the end of it. After you managed all your classes, you get back home and make the agonizing way upstairs. Entering your room felt like heaven, being reliefed that it's over, but now you have to take care of yourself somehow.

Settling down in the kitchen, you make another hot tea and slice up some fruits, in hopes the vitamins will make you fitter. You sit down at the kitchen table with a light grunt, only now noticing the terrible aching of your limbs.

To make your throat hurt less, you take a few careful sips before you take a few small slices and try eating them. It feels refreshing but swallowing them down feels like getting sand paper getting shoved down your throat. And taking sips of hot tea doesn't help your case. So, you give up on eating the whole plate and leave it half-finished at the table. After downing the last sips of your cup, you move back upstairs and snuggle into your fuzzy blankets.

It feels heavenly and you wait for the shiver to go away, starting to warm up slowly under the mountains of blankets. Still in school uniform, you take a short nap, which didn't feel satisfying or restful at all. Your body keeps shivering and your head is pounding with a dull ache, not even being able to relax fully by yourself. Being fed up and still sick, you slowly creep your way towards the Batcave since your first aid kit in your room doesn't have medicine, and the most useful stuff should be down there.

Your aching limbs manage to carry you down to the elevator, eventually getting to the medical section of the batcave. The cold climate of the cave doesn't help you, only making the shivers become more violent. But you find the needed items for your fever and some for your runny nose, eventually turning around to get back upstairs.

There stands the smaller but chilling creature, your younger brother. You jump up and almost let the packets of medicine down before you compose yourself quickly

»What are you planning with the medicine? Are you sick?«

It's clear by his tone that he's worried, but he still frowns up at you, arms crossed tightly.

»Uhm... « That came more as a croak, clearing your throat as you try to speak up properly. »Yeah... fever. « You finally manage out and sigh out afterwards, which only results into a coughing fit.

Damian leans away lightly, even though you're coughing into your inner elbow and try not to face him while doing so. With narrowed eyes, the younger teen gets the medicine from your hands and nods to the elevator.

»Please go upstairs and try not to slip and die. I will handle this for you.«

Despite his rough approach at this, you know that he only means well. With a softer expression, you get back into the Mansion and you make your agonizing way upstairs all over again. Finally there, you change into more comfortable clothes and collapse back onto bed. Waiting for Damian to return, you do nothing but stare up at the celing tiredly, and wish last night wasn't so rainy during patrol.

But you don't have much time thinking about it, hearing a short knock before Damian steps in with a bigger tray in hands. He comes closer and sets the tray on to your night stand, looking you over again.

Damian prepares a few pills and hands them over to you with a cup of water. »Take these.«

After swallowing down the few meds, you finally take in what's on that tray he brought in. There's a steaming cup of tea and a bowl of soup, a smaller plate with garlic bread and there's also a banana. He rubs the back of his neck as you take it in, eventually taking the bowl and almost salivate.

»I wish my nose would be working right now...« You rasp out, voice being mostly broken due to the fever and your stuffy nose. Damian presses his lips tightly together, eventually gesturing to the tray.

»Eat up. I know it's not the best, but at least you'll be better afterwards... do you need anything?« You shake your head at his words and start eating the warm soup, feeling like you might just descend into the sky. Your younger brother eventually quits your room and trusts you to rest up, even though he'll make sure to check up on you every now and then.

After finishing some of the soup and fresh garlic bread, you got back into your sheets and took a proper nap. Your fever went slightly away during that time, still feeling a bit cranky when you wake up. It's later into the evening and you're unsure if you can patrol tonight. Your determined mind, however, comes up with every excuse to go out anyway. A few moments later there's a short knock at your door before Damian enters again, checking up.

»How's your fever?« He asks straight away, coming up to the edge of your bed. You shrug lightly, leaning back against your headboard.

»Better, I think I'm healing up. Was just a bit dramatic earlier.« Knowing him, he will definitely be against going out on patrol with you tonight. So, you wait for his answer, but he doesn't and simply presses the back of his hand on your forehead. He frowns lightly, letting go after a moment.

»You're not dramatic. But that fever is dramatic. You need rest.« He stubbornly crosses his arms and tilts his head up, trying to look down at you this way. It makes you huff out, shortly after getting another coughing fit. Damian proves himself right and grins lightly, eventually handing you the banana you didn't finish up.

»Eat. I'm sure father won't you let out tonight either.«

And with that, he turns on his heel and leaves your room without further argument.

You stay in your bed for the rest of the evening, getting another portion of food from Damian for dinner. This time it was a salad and some warm mashed potatoes, saying that you should eat some light food but with enough nutrition. It does make you feel satisfied and you take another nap without even realising.

He quietly takes the dishes out of your room while you sleep, eventually leaving you alone again to rest up plenty. And indeed, when Bruce finally goes up to check up on you, he won't let you go out to patrol and instead makes sure that Alfred will keep an eye on you, ensuring him that you won't sneak out.

Now bored and sick, you do your studies as best you can, but eventually give up on them as well, after being unable to concentrate due to your growing headache. Falling asleep another time, Damian comes back inside after patrol and tucks you in properly, carefully laying your studies away and takes you in briefly before leaving to his own bed. He would be lying if he said he isn't worried. He almost panicked when he saw your pale and tired face back in the Batcave, having thought something way more serious has happened. But even after taking care of you like this, he still feels a tiny bit concerned. Be assured you'll be made fun of once you get back on your feet.

←MASTERLIST

[svgarseason]

𖹭 cw: mildly suggestive, fluff

══════════════𖹭 MINORS DNI 𖹭═════════════

PT 1 ⋆ PT 2 ⋆ PT 3 ⋆ PT 4 ⋆ PT 5 PT 6 [SOON]

English professor Nanami knew you were having relationship issues. Your boyfriend called him from a blocked number and told him to stay away from you. He made many not so eloquent accusations and threats before Professor Nanami calmly invited the man to put him in a position where he would be forced to defend himself.

Professor Nanami sincerely wishes that he would. Every time he thinks about the disgusting way the man spoke of you, he sees red. You deserve so much better than some insecure prick who steals numbers off your phone and talks about you like you're garbage.

Professor Nanami resists bringing it up with you, he knows you well enough to realize that it would only embarrass you. Although it pains him to see your face a little more drawn and tired for the next couple of days, he knows you are strong. He noticed that you changed your phone background from a picture of you with a man to a picture of you and what appears to be a young sibling. This is heartening. He hopes you have stopped inflicting that loser upon yourself.

Since he can't talk to you about it, he brings you coffee just the way you like it when you forget. He asks you if you've eaten when you don't take your lunch break. He thinks he understands why you are avoiding the cafeteria and the parking lot at this time of day, so he brings you a sandwich and soup from his favorite cafe across the street. It's hard to hold your gaze when you look at him the way you do after he offers it to you.

Even harder than that is looking at you stretched out on your belly asleep on the couch in his office. Hands tucked under your cheek, lips parted, bare legs peeking from beneath the blanket just below the curve of your ass, hair falling over the edge. It caught him off gaurd, that's why his heart lurches and his skin crawls with sparks of heat. That's why he has to step back into the hallway and take a deep breath, try to think of something unpleasant to combat the heat blooming low in his guts. That's what he tells himself, although he's not sure there's much of a point in maintaining the self delusion anymore. You are waking up when he steps back inside.

Professor Nanami 's mind is a whirlwind of thoughts before he even confirms with you that you've been sleeping on campus. It isn't safe. You must not be parking in the parking lot, they close that. You must park down the street. The building is locked at night. Gates are locked. What if you had some sort of medical emergency? No. You can't sleep here. He knows immediately that you've misunderstood him when he sees the way your face falls.

"You can stay with me," he hears himself say the words, drowning out the voice of reason telling him it's wildly inappropriate, that it can only end badly. Perhaps there is still a point in deluding himself, because he needs to be the one to fix this. "I have a spare bedroom. Just until you figure things out. You don't have to explain anything," he is saying but you are already nodding and smiling. Then you are off the couch in a blur of motion, which is a relief because the last thing he needs right now is to get a good look at you in you little tank and shorts. You are hugging him tight around the waist, cheek pressed into his chest, thanking him.

Professor Nanami pats you on the back, fighting for his life not to slip his hands around your waist and let his fingers map out the skin beneath your top. With herculean effort,he peels himself away from the warm crush of your body, the maddening scent of you. He is quick to take a seat at his desk, coat in his lap hiding the evidence his true feelings until you leave to shower and dress, cursing his perversion. Hard from a simple hug. How will he tolerate you living in his house?

𖹭 a/n: just want to say thanks for reading. Really appreciate you guys interacting. I'll be done with this series after a few more parts, so feel free to send me requests (:

[rafesapologist]

the 1 — rafe cameron (mini series)

summary: one summer with rafe cameron was enough to make you fall madly in love with him, but at the end of the day you were just a pogue, and rafe would be leaving for college soon.

warnings: angst, age change (y/n is 17, rafe is 18), swearing, underage drinking, unedited

author's note: a fair warning to all of you who know of it, but this mini series will be inspired by 'the notebook'. i rewatched it before i started this and i was inspired + i wanted to do a mini series for holiday break, so without further ado, enjoy!!

You stand there, your apprehension dripping off of you like the summer humidity clinging to the air. The Boneyard sprawls before you, a kaleidoscope of bonfires, shadows, and laughter carried on the salty breeze. This is your first party ever, even though you’re seventeen. Your friends had begged you to come, their promises of escapade outweighing your usual reluctance.

Now, standing in the open among a mix of Kooks, Pogues, and Tourons, you feel impossibly small. Even with your group of friends around you, the scene feels overwhelming. It’s the beginning of summer break, the time to shed inhibitions and let loose. But you don’t know how, your comfort zone is a quiet corner, not the chaos of a gathering like this.

Your mind races, a storm of doubt and self-consciousness that won’t quiet. You wonder again why you even came. Around you, everyone else seems to be living their best lives—laughing, shouting, throwing themselves into the night like it’s their birthright. It’s as if the start of summer ignited something in them that you don’t have, something wild and carefree.

But not you. You can’t seem to shake the tension knotting your shoulders, the unease simmering just beneath your skin. You take a cautious sip of your drink, wincing as the sharp burn of vodka mixed with cranberry juice scratches at your throat. It’s not pleasant, but you hope it might work some magic soon.

You linger on the edges of your friend group, pretending to listen as they exchange jokes and stories you can’t bring yourself to care about. Their voices blend into the background noise of waves and music. Your mind drifts, untethered, far from this moment.

You take another sip, silently pleading for the alcohol to loosen its grip on your nerves, to numb the anxiety you’ve carried here like a weight. But it doesn’t come. The tension in your chest refuses to yield, a stubborn reminder that this kind of freedom might not be yours to claim.

Reality snaps back the moment your friends erupt in sudden cheers, rallying you to join them at the makeshift bar just a few feet away. The noise jolts you like a splash of cold water. You glance down at your half-empty cup, the remnants of cranberry-red liquid sloshing faintly under the firelight. For a moment, you hesitate, but then you shrug, forcing yourself to down the rest in one go. It burns on the way down, and you fight the urge to grimace as you follow them.

At the bar, you retreat into your usual timid form, arms crossed over your chest, shoulders drawn tight. The crowd buzzes around you like a hive, each person louder, more confident, more at ease than you feel. You stand silently, watching your friends engage in their effortless chatter with the person mixing drinks, their laughter spilling into the night. You’re grateful for their boldness, it saves you from the awkwardness of having to ask for anything yourself.

When one of them hands you your new drink, a familiar vodka cranberry, you give them a small smile. It’s the best you can muster, but it feels genuine in that moment. “Thanks,” you murmur, raising your cup slightly in their direction before taking another swig. The drink goes down a little easier this time, though the warmth spreading through your chest still feels foreign. You hope it’s the beginning of something, anything, that will make this night a little less daunting.

The next half-hour drifts by in a blur of drinks and laughter, each sip peeling back a level of your apprehension. The alcohol works its slow magic, loosening the tight grip anxiety has on you. You’re not the life of the party, not yet, but you’re finding your voice in the safe confines of your friends. It’s a small victory, but it’s something.

Your group gravitates toward the bonfire, standing in a loose circle that feels warm both from the alcohol pooling in your veins and the fire crackling behind you. The world feels softer and easier now, its edges smudged just enough to make everything seem less sharp, less overwhelming.

It’s in this softened haze that you feel it: the weight of someone’s gaze, heavy and deliberate. It prickles at the back of your neck, enough to jolt you from the conversation. You glance up, scanning the crowd beyond the flames. The faces blur slightly, but then you see him.

He’s tall, towering even, easily over six feet. His hair catches the firelight, dirty blond despite the buzzcut that does little to dull his striking features. His broad shoulders and strong stance exude an intimidating confidence that sets him apart from the crowd. But it’s his face that holds you, the sharp angles, the perfection of it all, like something carved from stone.

You can’t tell if it’s the alcohol or something else entirely, but your chest tightens as his piercing gaze meets yours. It’s unrelenting, a tether that keeps you locked in place, even as the world spins around you.

Your breath catches, a sharp intake that barely fills your lungs. His gaze remains steady, unyielding, like he’s daring you to look away first. The boldness of it unsettles you but he doesn’t flinch, doesn’t shift uncomfortably under the weight of being caught. If anything, he seems to relish it, a quiet confidence radiating from him.

You take in more of his surroundings, noting the group of guys he’s standing with. Their clothes polished, expensive, unmistakably Kook signal their place on this island’s invisible social ladder. His presence among them only cements your assumption: he’s a Kook too, one who belongs to the world that always feels just out of reach, a world that seems to thrive on your unease.

His appearance, so composed and self-assured, intimidates you further. It’s not just his stature or his looks, it’s the certainty in the way he holds himself, as if the world bends to his will.

Your friends are oblivious to what’s unfolding, their laughter a faint echo in the background. For a moment, it feels like time has slowed, the firelight casting shadows that flicker between you and this stranger. Nervous energy wells up in your chest, an overwhelming tide that you can’t push back.

It consumes you, forcing you to break first. You glance away, the weight of his gaze still lingering even as you turn back to your friends. Their conversation sweeps you back into its folds, and you force yourself to smile, to nod along as if you’re present. But in the back of your mind, the image of him and his piercing eyes, his commanding presence; burns like an afterimage you can’t quite shake.

A few more minutes slip by, and you glance down to see your cup empty, save for the faint red tint of cranberry at the bottom. “Be right back,” you tell your friends, raising your voice just enough to cut through their chatter. “Just getting another drink.”

They barely register your words, caught up in their conversation, and you head to the bar alone this time. Without your friends flanking you, the walk feels more exposed, but the alcohol dulls that vulnerability. It’s easier now to shift through the sea of bodies, the music and laughter blurring into white noise.

You order your usual, vodka cranberry, and step aside to let the next person take their turn. Leaning against the counter, you let your gaze wander, caught somewhere between the firelight and the rhythm of the night.

Then it happens. A deep voice cuts through the haze, pulling you sharply back to reality.

“Are you new around here?”

The words are casual, but they send a jolt through your chest. You turn, almost cautiously, to face whoever spoke them.

And there he is. The stranger from across the bonfire. Up close, he’s even more striking, tall and broad-shouldered, with a presence that seems to command the space around him. His piercing eyes meet yours, and though his expression is relaxed, there’s an intensity in the way he looks at you that’s impossible to ignore.

"Uh," you stammer, your voice catching as you clear your throat. "No. No, I’m not. I just… don’t go out very often." You laugh, hesitant and unsure, trying to chip away at the palpable tension settling between you and this stranger.

He tilts his head slightly, his expression shifting from curiosity to faint surprise at your answer. After a moment, he simply nods, taking a slow swig of his beer. The motion is unhurried, his confidence unsettlingly effortless.

“You shouldn’t be hiding a face like yours,” he says, the words slipping from his mouth with a sly edge.

The comment catches you off guard, and your eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Heat creeps into your cheeks, unbidden, and you’re certain the faint flush is visible even in the dim light.

“Oh. Thank you,” you murmur, your voice softer now, barely audible over the surrounding noise. You chuckle nervously, the sound light but forced, and avert your eyes to the ground. The weight of his intense gaze is too much to bear, and you focus instead on the empty cup in your hands, fiddling with it as if it might offer some kind of escape.

There’s a silence that stretches between you, fragile and uneasy, like the moments just before a storm breaks. The fire crackles somewhere behind you, but its warmth can’t touch the chill that prickles at your skin. His eyes stay locked on you, unrelenting, like he’s studying the cracks in your armor. And you can tell he enjoys this.

He revels in the way you fidget under his stare, the way your breath catches and your fingers curl tighter around the plastic cup. But there’s something else, too, something darker in the way he looks at you. It’s not just confidence; it’s control, a hunger for whatever power this moment gives him. And yet, even knowing this, you don’t move.

His words shatter the silence. “Let me take you out sometime.”

It isn’t a question. It’s a statement, sharp and certain, like he’s already decided the answer.

Your eyes snap up to his, wide and startled. You almost laugh, because surely this is a joke, a cruel one meant to entertain him and his perfectly dressed friends who are probably watching from somewhere nearby, waiting for you to embarrass yourself.

“What?” The word tumbles out before you can stop it, your voice barely steady.

His lips curve slightly, but it isn’t quite a smile. “I said, I’d like to take you out sometime.” He repeats it slower this time, as if you didn’t hear him the first time, as if he’s daring you to challenge him.

You open your mouth to respond, but nothing comes out. The world tilts slightly, whether from the alcohol or the weight of his words, you can’t tell. All you know is that he’s still staring, waiting for you to say something, to give him a reason to step closer or walk away.

And you can’t decide which one you want more.

You shake your head firmly, the movement small but resolute. "I don’t think that’s a good idea," you say, your voice steadier than you feel.

But he doesn’t flinch. That smirk, half amusement, half something you can’t quite name, lingers on his lips, and it sets your nerves alight. It’s infuriating, how unaffected he seems, like he’s already won this game you didn’t agree to play.

You brace yourself, expecting him to scoff or roll his eyes, to walk away and let this moment crumble into nothing. But he doesn’t move.

"And why’s that?" His words are low and deliberate, tipped with sarcasm, and they hit you square in the chest.

You falter, staring at him like he’s some kind of puzzle you can’t figure out. Why hasn’t he given up yet? Most people would’ve shrugged off your rejection and moved on, but he stands there, solid and unwavering, as if you haven’t just pushed him away.

You swallow hard and force yourself to speak. "Because…" You gesture vaguely at him, your words fumbling as you try to make sense of this. "Look at you. You’re clearly a Kook, and I’m not. I’m not going to say yes just to end up being laughed at, for what? Being some dare your friends put on you?"

His head tips back slightly, and he laughs. It’s not cruel, but it’s sharp and warm, like he’s genuinely amused by how wrong you are. The sound coils through you, confusing and unsettling all at once.

"You think I came over to talk to you because my friends dared me to?" he repeats, the question coated in disbelief and something dangerously close to admiration.

You don’t answer, just stare at him, your pulse quickening under the weight of his words.

Because he’s still standing there, still looking at you like he sees something worth waiting for. And it terrifies you.

"Well, yeah," you reply, matter-of-fact and sharp, but the edge in your voice doesn’t hide the unease curling in your stomach. "Why else would you be here with a Pogue?"

The words hang there, heavy and bitter. You force a half-hearted laugh, hoping it might soften the blow or drown out the doubt clawing its way to the surface. But it doesn’t. The uncertainty lingers, sticking to you like salt air and sweat.

He doesn’t waver. Instead, he licks his lips, slow and deliberate, before tipping his beer back for another sip. It’s infuriating, the way he moves with such ease, as if he’s never doubted himself a day in his life.

Then he says it.

"I came over here because as soon as I saw you, I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you."

His voice is steady, low enough that you feel it more than hear it, but there’s no mistaking the confidence in his tone. It’s not a line, it doesn’t feel rehearsed or hollow. It’s simply the truth, spoken as plainly as if he were commenting on the weather.

And that’s what makes it so dangerous.

You can’t stop the sharp breath that slips past your lips or the way your fingers tighten around your empty cup. He’s too much; too bold, too certain, too beautiful for someone like you.

You drop your gaze, trying to regain some semblance of control, but it doesn’t help. His words linger, heavy and unshakable, seeping into your skin. You look back up at him, and he’s still there, still looking at you like you’re something worth staring at. And it terrifies you more than anything ever has.

Your breath catches, shallow and unsteady, as if the weight of his words has pressed the air right out of your lungs. You open your mouth, but nothing comes out. Your voice caught somewhere between disbelief and fear.

Your eyes flicker away from him, desperate for an escape. You scan the crowd, the fire, the shadows cast by bodies moving and swaying in the night; but no matter where you look, you can feel it. Him. His stare clings to you like smoke, thick and suffocating, refusing to let you slip away unnoticed.

If he’s lying, he’s a hell of a liar, you think. Too practiced. Too composed. And yet, there’s something unsettlingly genuine about the way he’s looking at you.

You hate how much you want to believe him.

Still, you don’t move, don’t let yourself lean into the moment. You’ve been here before, dangling on the edge of something that felt real, only to fall flat when the truth unraveled. And you refuse to be played again.

“How do I know you’re not just messing with me?”

The words fall out before you can second-guess them, softer than you intended but laced with an edge of defiance. Your gaze finally snaps back to his, searching for cracks, for some sign that this is just another game, another pretty lie dressed up in confidence and charm.

But he doesn’t flinch.

Instead, he steps closer, just enough to make your pulse quicken. The firelight catches in his eyes, and for a moment, you swear they burn just as fiercely.

“You don’t,” he says, the corners of his mouth tugging into the faintest smirk. “But maybe that’s what makes it worth finding out.”