#but i know sora’s not infallible and I’m not gonna buy any narrative that insists he is

[daylighteclipsed]

Sora always without fail chasing his friends to his demise

CoM:

Re:Coded:

DDD:

“Well… my heart was aching. That’s why I kept going.”

“Aren’t hearts great? Steer us wrong every time.”

In DDD, Sora chases after all the people in his heart. Mickey, Donald, Goofy. Namine, Xion, Roxas. Kairi, Riku (who briefly morph into Aqua and Terra before returning to normal). In every instance, his friends are moving away from him, and he’s struggling to catch up, to reach them.

Kairi and Riku are the last people he “finds,” and the dialogue delivery suggests he’s been looking for them the whole time/the most, as if there’s a silent “finally” in his breathless, “I found you!” In CoM, Kairi and Riku are the illusions/false truths (in the forms of Namine and Repliku) that Sora chases through Castle Oblivion — like DDD, the villains there are trying to trick him into renouncing his self and autonomy. And as we all know, Kairi and Riku are the people Sora consistently chases through all of the games.

Castle Oblivion does lead Sora nowhere, to nothing but fake memories and a fractured sense of self and reality. He suffers, and it changes him, and he does not like who he becomes. This is a repeated fear he expresses, turning into or realizing he is somebody else. He is warned he may not be the same after Castle Oblivion, and he rejects his new self in the end. “Make me like I was.” The existence of Roxas, the idea that Sora is not who he thinks he is and has memories he’s not aware of, deeply disturbs him and makes him increasingly hateful towards the Organization members that insist on calling him “Roxas” or “traitor.” Earlier in DDD, Xemnas also unnerves Sora by questioning if his memories and feelings — and thus, his character and identity — are in fact, his own and not the products of someone else.

The dreams in DDD lead him nowhere as well, just deeper into the Chasm of Dreams, the darkness. In both DDD and CoM, he is warned to stop, to recognize the difference between real and unreal, but clings to his friends and unreality regardless. Perhaps because it would hurt more to lose sight of them than to chase them forever just out of reach. “My heart was aching…”

There is something ironic about Data Sora being the only version of Sora to learn how to let go and manage his hurt/loss. Loss of others and/or loss of self — which Sora so closely ties to others. All of his power comes from others. His value. His purpose. Who he is expected to be. Sometimes loss is agony. Grieving a friend or mourning who we no longer are. But loss is part of life, and, as Re:Coded says, the pain of loss helps us understand others better. It can shape us into someone kinder if we accept it, and it can destroy us if we don’t.

It does not feel like a coincidence that Sora, the real Sora, continuously fails to let go/cut his losses and is nearly destroyed or falls to darkness because of it. I pegged this as a flaw all the way back in KH1, after he kills himself to free Kairi’s heart from his body, and it looks like I was right.

Sora has not learned to accept loss, whether it’s letting go of a friend or someone he used to be. He hasn’t changed, and the narrative has not demanded he change much. But now it’s striking next to Riku who has changed a lot, overcoming his flaws and insecurities that prevented him from growing back in KH1. Riku’s developed an immunity to darkness. He’s a Keyblade Master. He’s grown up. Sora has not.

Considering he’s afraid of becoming someone else, it would be cool if some parts of Sora are a product of Ventus and he struggles after losing Ven’s heart. Or if the negativity Sora buries bubbles to the surface more often… in which case it’s less about becoming someone else and more accepting he’s already different. Like growing older irl, his experiences have changed him, and sometimes it’s hard to love who we become. We know the darkness has gotten to him (hello anti-form), but nobody around him seems to notice.

I suspect Sora’s going to keep facing loss and the pain of loss until he learns to accept it. He’s managed to avoid any major consequences up to now, but with how close he comes to being Xehanort’s final vessel DDD is a really close call. It feels like a warning.